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INVASION OF CHINESE PRODUCTS AFFECTS BRASILIAN INDUSTRY
SEPTEMBER
Condensed milk here, marshmallows here.
Peanut brittles, sweet potato sweets,
and sweet popcorn.
Are you taking any toys? The children love them!
I've got some toy police cars that outside are 15.
But if you take two, I'll let you take them for 10.
-Should I? -Of course you should!
Take all 4 to close the lot. Christmas is here!
-Christmas in September? -Time flies!
The manufacturers are broke and stopped production.
Mr. Nazir knows his stuff. I'd take them all if I were you.
What will you take for the girls?
What girls?
Don't you have a daughter, a niece, a goddaughter?
Look at this nice doll for 19,99.
It's not a cheap one, the eyes open and close.
It has real hair.
If you take 2, I'll leave it at 15, deal?
I saw this doll at half price around the corner.
You get what you pay for!
Those fake toys can lose an eye and the child could choke, die.
-Whose fault is it? -Whose?
-Yours! -Or the fake toys'.
They are destroying Brazil's economy.
Ma'am, olive oil on top,
honey in the middle, and wine at the bottom,
won't fool anyone.
Did you hear? Wine at the bottom.
-Do you want to rot in prison? -No, get me a doll.
-Here, take another. -Alright.
"From To's?"
FROM: TO:
Take the presents. How many children do you have?
-3 boys. -The boys will love them!
-Bye, dear. -Bye.
-Merry Christmas! -To you too.
-Mrs. Fran! -What?
Where is Carlos Eduardo? He's still not here.
I must deliver this to Mr. Bernardo.
I'm worried about him.
He went to see his aunt, she's rag and bone.
She's in the hospital.
Even so, he said he'd be early.
He probably got stuck traffic.
-What happened? -It hit the fan.
That's conspiracy.
Let me tell you,
bet 5 on the Pig, and 5 on the Crocodile.
Repeat last week's.
I can't, my child's bike broke.
-It's up to you. -5 on the Pig and Crocodile.
-Alright? -Thanks.
Hey, honey, you're going to trip walking so fast.
-Oh, my! -Capelete, all on the Peacock.
She jumped the gun! The delivery!
Francis, I'll be right there.
Close up that game.
It's closed, But the cashier isn't.
Pisces:
"Moon in quadrature with Neptune.
Pisceans may be feeling divided.”
I'm divided.
"Emotional matters are focused.”
Check his, to see if we match.
"Sagittarius, an interesting day for revealing conversations."
"You're changing your mind about relationships."
Really?
I'll check the Chinese horoscope.
You are a Snake, and I think he's a Pig.
-Pig? -Hello, ma'am?
Do you have Christmas lights?
Christmas in September?
She's just like me, cautious.
Time flies.
-Don't mind her, she's slow. -I'm not slow.
Then offer her coffee so I can make a sale.
-You cut the coffee. -Find a way.
Read her some mystical stuff,
while I fetch the lights.
Dear, I'm going up to our warehouse
to find your lights.
Stay here with An dress a, she'll show you something cool.
She will read your aura.
Do you have time to take a shower?
-Hey, Jessica. -Hi.
Do you have Christmas lights?
Have Christmas lights arrived?
-Do you have Christmas lights? -No, my dear.
Oh my, where will I find them?
Christmas lights...
Do you have Christmas lights?
-Maybe the Chinese has it. -Across the street?
Christmas trees, Santa Claus, get it?
Flickering lights. Flickering.
Foreigners don't understand a word we say.
Not glasses, Christmas.
Don't they know what Christmas is in China?
The birth of...
Jesus.
Jesus is born, it's Christmas. Peace and love.
Jesus. No, not hair clips.
Jesus.
-Jesus. -Here, all Buddha.
-All "booty"? -Buddha.
-All "boobie"? -Buddha.
Oh, all Buddha!
Interesting, but I want lights.
St. George, give me light. They don't understand.
I know! Flickering!
Look, over here.
Flickering!
-Okay. -Okay, poor thing.
How terrible! I'm glad I'm not foreign.
-Alright! -It's 1,99.
What's with the price? That's outrageous!
-Too expensive? -No, too cheap!
How can 140 lights cost 1.99?
Things here are cheap and very good.
I doubt they'll still be flickering on the 25th.
Get me 10 bucks of lights. That's 5 boxes, right?
So stupid. I'm glad I'm not foreign.
I feel sorry for foreigners. It's the same doll.
Mrs. Chinese...
-What's your name? -Mrs. Lai.
Mrs. Lai, how much are these dolls?
8.99.
-Only that? -"Chip," right?
"Vely chip."”
-Do you have plenty? -Yes, lots.
Oh, darn.
-Hey. -Hey!
Change? Are you trying to annoy me?
Too cheap. Thanks, and bye, Mr...
-Chao. -I'm going, but, your name?
Chao!
How disrespectful! Why won't he tell me his name?
His name is Chao.
I'm sorry. So, your name is Chao?
Ciao, Mr. Chao.
I like it.
-Ciao, Chao. -Bye bye.
Bye bye, may Buddha be with you.
See ya.
Be careful.
Soon skanks will be chasing your husband.
In the summer, they're like cockroaches,
they're out when it's hot.
Here, ma'am, I found your lights.
Sorry for the wait, the stock was a mess.
-How much? -It's 1,99.
-That's it? -Yes, everything is cheap here.
-I'll take 2. -She's cautious like me.
Since I'm so forewarned, let's get your Christmas gifts.
-An dress a will show you. -Yes, let's go.
There are lots of things on sale.
-Thank you. -You're welcome.
-It's a boy, right? -Yes, boy.
-How old is he? -He's 6.
We have building blocks, the ABC game, dominoes.
I'll be right back, dear!
If you came begging for money, just leave!
-Alright. -Have you organized the stock?
-But, Dad, I'm caught up. -Caught up?
I've been asking you for 3 months!
You don't sound like a merchant's son!
-Do you remember grandpa? -Please!
-Your grandpa left Lebanon... -Empty handed.
Here he found enough willpower to make America!
Why didn't he go to the USA? It's a much better America.
Respect!
We are greatly in debt to this country
that welcomed us with open arms.
Dad, that was 100 years ago.
That already happened. Think about the future.
Respect Brazil. Respect!
There's a sign that says:
"Even Lebanon's vines make way for a Brazilian."
- I know. -Very good.
Repeat it.
"Even Lebanon's vines make way for a Brazilian."
With respect. Try again.
"Even Lebanon's vines
make way for a Brazilian."
Very good.
Now go and organize the stock.
Carlos Eduardo, where were you?
I sent your aunt to the hospital for the 3rd time.
Mr. Nazir is out to get you!
You know I live far. I take 3 buses.
If I lived closer, such as, your house.
Don't go there! My house is my house.
I've worked since I was 11 to have my own things.
If I moved in, I wouldn't be late.
You mean, move in with me?
I've already raised my children. Why raise an old man?
-Not over my dead body. -My black girl...
We are a couple, dear. Couples live together.
A couple means women getting screwed up,
or me waking up early to make you dinner?
You want to live together so you can change the channel.
To open my fridge and eat my yogurt?
No way!
Seriously, dear, I'm sure you'd love it.
-Stop it. -Imagine breakfast in bed.
Stop it, Carlos Eduardo.
Caressing you. Cuddling in bed.
How often must I tell you
deodorant is not perfume, Carlos Eduardo?
You wasted my entire can of deodorant!
That one!
Let's see if we can afford it.
-Hello
-How may I help you? -How much is this doll?
-This one? -Yeah.
It's yours.
1800 number, it's free.
It's so cheap it's not even 20; it's only 19,99,
Oh, 19...
Take 2 and I'll leave it at 15.
No, thanks. Take it.
At the Chinese store it's a lot cheaper.
Let's go, my dear.
They're ripping us off.
Oh, my God.
-Come on, everyone! -Geez.
-Everything here is super cheap! -Sorry, Mr. Nazir.
But we must talk, we can't work like this.
-What is it? -Did you hear about the Chinese?
-They're selling a similar doll. -So what?
We sell it for 15 on a bargain, and they price it at 8.99!
Impossible!
-How can they go so low? -I don't know.
I can't sleep just thinking about this.
How can they have such absurd prices?
I don't get it. We have to find out!
Quite the enigma!
But do you know what really annoys me?
Those Christmas lights. How can that be, Mr. Nazir?
A box full of lights costs 1.99!
Think with me, add it up.
I buy a plug at Mr. Salim's, 4 bucks.
One meter of wire at Mr. Hashid's, 10 bucks.
A dozen of lights at Mr. Nacib's,
round it to 12, that's over 20.
And they have to box it and bring it from China!
That's impossible!
You are right!
We can't handle disloyal competition!
Soon they'll be selling dog sfiha.
Did you know they eat dog?
-Are you sure? -Yes, I saw it in a movie.
No, I mean the price.
I'm sure, I saw it for myself.
-That's it! That's it! -Calm down!
That's why we lost so much business!
Please, stay calm, Mr. Nazir.
Why did I open my mouth? He can't handle this.
No one cares about what happens to the Brazilian industry.
-Do they? -Calm down, sir.
Where are you going?
Stay on the register.
Come on, people!
Come on in!
Look, the Arab went crazy.
Come on in!
Cigarettes!
Authentic Paraguayan cigarettes!
Authentic and Paraguayan?
That's all I needed.
Come in, people!
Young lady, please!
Come here.
It's all wonderful!
Come in, guys!
Look at that!
Now I'm only using chop sticks.
Come in, guys!
-Let's go, guys! -Carlos Eduardo?
-Come in! -Carlos Eduardo!
Can you come here real quick?
Right on, my queen.
-What did you say? -What?
Saying you're only using chopsticks from now on.
-I'm watching you! - I was kidding.
Go on, laugh.
-I'm just looking around, okay? -Okay.
-How much is this? -"Thiteen."
-How much? -One, "thlee."”
-One, "thlee, thiteen." -One, "thlee."”
-What a weird bunch. -Who are you talking about?
Those Chinese are very weird.
I saw in a karate movie
that they eat scorpions.
There are no scorpions here. What do they eat here?
I bet they're eating cockroaches.
Look at him!
Poor guy! Oh, my God!
They don't understand a word we say.
Always with a stupid look on their face.
They laugh at the wrong time.
Thank God I'm not foreign.
I heard the Chinese thingy is horizontal.
Show me some respect!
Haven't you ever heard that before?
I think you know a bit too much.
You're too interested in the horizontal.
How much are you selling these for?
8.99.
8.99?
It's "chip."
It's a little too "chip."
No checks, no cards. Cash only.
You are in Brazil, not in China!
You shouldn't speak a foreign language
around a customer!
It's lack of respect! Didn't you know?
No "pulchase," no "ploblem.”
I won't buy a thing!
Who knows if you are badmouthing me?
An dress a?
-Yes, Peri? -My sign is Leo.
Could the stars be favoring an independent, successful,
heir to an empire in Saara,
to go along a wonderful babe like you?
Let's do it.
For you that are of Leo,
the drought goes on.
I doubt it.
-My God! -What's wrong, Dad?
This is becoming Babel!
What happened, Mr. Nazir?
Here in Saara, we all want to make money.
Treating clients well, paying taxes.
But the Chinese!
-What happened? -They can't treat us well.
-Did they offend you? -How should I know?
They only speak Chinese!
St. George Store can't compete with the Chinese prices!
I wish
Dad was here to tell me what to do.
Let him be. We aren't there, and he's not here.
Call An dress a to do a reading on Grandpa.
Shut up!
The Chinese are smart and are taking over the world!
-We'll miss the USA. -That's true.
But St. George is bigger,
he'll teach us how to slay this Chinese dragon.
How, Francis?
That's a smart question. Please, how?
We must fight toe to toe.
We have to buy Chinese products and sell cheaper than them.
Buy them where? They're very reserved.
Here nothing is reserved.
This isn't Chinatown. Everything is mixed up.
I'm going to make them open their eyes.
Even if I have to do a voodoo spell for Buddha.
I'll get the Chinese Dragon under St. George's mantle.
May God be with you.
Din Din no want prisoner! Din Din want go out!
He is not the boss of Din Din.
I will never marry him!
I hate Chao! I hate you!
That's why no one appreciates the pig.
-What? -Do you know why?
What's with the pig?
The pig walks with his head low.
It's about attitude, not looking up or down.
Money fell on the floor? Forget it and keep going.
You're crazy! You drank too much.
Ask for the check. What's with the pig?
Waldir, the check, please.
-Geez, I forgot my wallet! -You forgot?
You haven't seen each other in a long time.
I've got too much in my head.
Too much in the head and nothing in your pocket.
Give me my bag, Zero Credit.
Stop looking for it, you'll never find that wallet.
-I'll get the next one. -I know it by heart.
"Next time, I insist.”
Insist on what?
Waldir, here.
YEAR 4712
Give us each day our daily bread
and forgive our debts
just like we forgive those indebted to us.
Lead us not into temptation. YEAR 2014
But deliver us from evil. YEAR 2014
Because yours is, the king, the glory, and power.
YEAR 5770
At 5, your child is your dictator.
At 10, your slave.
At 15, he resembles you.
And then he becomes
your friend, or foe.
Come on! Peri is a good kid!
God knows, he can't even manage his own room.
-Much less a business! -Things change, Nazir!
My children don't care about the business.
But at least you got them to graduate.
Peri dropped out of college.
"I don't feel like studying."”
What does feeling have to do with thinking?
-But, friend... -What is it?
The raise, it's too expensive. I won't make it.
The rent here is a bargain!
For years it has been the same price!
These are different times!
I've never been in such a tight spot.
I understand you don't feel the burden,
"cause the Chinese don't sell gold.
The Arabs are always the victims!
What are the humble Arabs
compared to those chosen by God?
Carlos Eduardo!
I am free! Bye!
Where are you going, Zero Credit?
-Over there. -No way.
-You're kidding, right? -The China boss hired me.
But, seriously, the boat here is sinking.
When the ship sinks, the rats are the first to leave.
-Are you calling me a rat? -No, stupid.
Do you think you'll have it easy like here?
Let's see when you get late.
-Go on. -You're jealous.
Only beggars envy the poor.
The Chinese are eating out of my hand.
Eating what? You're always starving.
Go on! Get out of here! Hurry!
Do you think I'm a traitor?
Things got rough and you ran.
I'm just trying to make some money
so you stop disrespecting me, calling me "zero credit."
-Get out of here. -I am going.
If you're going to stay like that, then I won't go.
Go! Get out of here!
For you to be like that, no.
-I want you to go. -Look at me.
I would never betray you. Never crossed my mind.
I am loyal to you. We are tight.
-Are we really tight? -You know it.
Then go!
-I'm not going. -Now I want you to go.
-No, I'm not. -Go, Carlos Eduardo!
-Not anymore. -Yes, you are.
Find out how things work, so we can get in.
You want me to discover
where the Chinese hide the cheap merchandise?
-Go! - I got it.
Eye on the China man, I've got my eye on you.
Deal.
Can I have some chopsticks?
Thanks.
Let's go, guys. The prices are wonderful!
You dropped it!
The prices dropped!
Come on, gather round!
Come on in here!
Do you miss the traitor?
Mind your own, An dress a.
But he's not a traitor.
Really? He went over to China's side.
-He's a huge traitor. -Yeah, An dress a is right.
Carlos Eduardo is a traitor.
I'm so ahead of you!
I put Carlos Eduardo in there.
He's spying on the Chinese to find out their scheme.
We have everything! Come on, guys!
Commerce is so stressing.
That's why we must relax on our days off.
-Do you like the beach? -"Bich"?
Beach, sun, sea, beer.
-Mandioc flour. - I don't know.
Do you want to go to the beach on Sunday?
I don't know.
Din Din, what do the Chinese do on Sundays?
-Do they go to mass? -Mass?
Yes, mass, father... Halleluiah, brother!
No brother. In China, only one child.
No, Din Din, no children.
Please, we are just starting to get to know each other.
Let me take you to the beach to have a nice barbeque.
-You need to tan. - I don't know.
-Din Din! -Oh, trouble.
Hey, you!
-Yes, boss? -You get paid to work!
-Not to talk. -We were talking about stock.
Carlos Eduardo doesn't fool around.
Come on guys, get in here! The China man is crazy.
We have a customer.
Move your ass and go there.
No, I'm still in my lunch break.
I'll take care of Andressa's ass.
-What about you? -I'm not a salesman.
I'm the sales supervisor.
Seriously.
-Peri. -Oh, Peril
-Hi, may I help you? -Do you have coin purses?
Coin purses...
Here, I have this bag, that has lots of little bags.
This little one is good for coins.
And you get a beautiful bag for 20 bucks.
Not a bag.
You don't want a bag.
How about an aquatic bag?
-Aquatic? -Aquatic fitness.
-Don't you do aquatic fitness? -No!
But you should, it changes people's lives.
Francis, you used to be better.
Listen, what do you call it, supervisor?
Let me tell you, this boat is sinking.
The owner is old and sick.
The person who should take over, I won't mention any names,
someone who's present, from his own family,
isn't doing anything!
I was looking for the bathroom, I need to piss.
Go back to work!
Of course. Thanks, boss!
Girl, they mentioned my name!
I got scared.
A big man like you scared of a tiny Chinese?
Of course, it looked like a Bruce Lee movie.
And by the look of things, Chao is the boss.
Chao, really? But what were they saying?
I don't know, they were speaking Chinese.
You brought me all the way over here
to tell me that in China the Chinese speak Chinese?
-But I got one thing. -What?
Something like "... container.”
-What? -"... container.”
-Speak slower. -"...container."”
Containers, where they store the merchandise.
So, what besides container?
If I were you, I'd pressure Mrs. Lai.
-Women can't hold secrets. - I noticed she dislikes Chao.
You pressure Mrs. Lai
and I'll pressure Din Din.
Is that all you think about?
I am risking my life for you and you're complaining?
Oh, you're in such great danger.
If you fool with the Chinese, they'll cut off your finger.
That only happens in movies.
- I wouldn't risk it. -Imagine that.
If I cut off your fingers each time you fooled with me,
I'd have to start cutting off other things.
Oh, my God!
Waldir, bring me the check!
Oh, no, stop it!
St. George, it's the end of the world!
What day is today? I declare a national holiday!
Didn't I tell you the next one was on me?
If you don't want it, I'll keep it.
Of course I want it, I just feel bad.
If I knew you'd pay, I'd have ordered some shrimp.
"Ex-Zero Credit"!
Hey, "Ex-Zero Credit".
OCTOBER
That's 4,99. "Vely chip!”
Hi, Mrs. Lai, do you remember me?
I was here last week, Francis.
-"Flancis?” -You don't remember.
So, Mrs. Lai, how do you like Brazil?
Mrs. Lai, I came here to talk to you about...
I wanted to learn Chinese!
Chinese is the language of the future.
Do you want to teach me?
How much are these Christmas lights?
-1.99, can you believe it? -Only that?
-This world of lights. -So cheap.
I don't know how it can be so cheap.
It's a great store!
It's a beautiful store. Who is that?
It's beautiful. Who is that?
-Kuan kun. -Kuan kun?
Kuan kun.
-Good for the store. -Really?
He protects merchants.
-"Waliol.” -A warrior?
Here we also have a warrior protector,
St. George, he protects the store, the people.
It's the same thing.
-And who's that? -More "waliols."
White face good to count.
It's good with numbers?
Red face, good for business.
And black face, well sell.
Black face sells well?
-A good one. -Great.
So, Mrs. Lai, back to business?
-What? -I need to know.
Mrs. Lai, what's the deal?
How can you sell these lights for 1,99?
If I buy a plug at Mr. Salim's, it's 4 bucks!
If I buy a meter of cable at Mr. Hashid's, it's 10 bucks.
A dozen colored lights at Mr. Nacib's, it's 12 bucks.
That's 26 bucks, you sell it at 1,99!
I don't get it.
A letter to China would be more expensive.
Too many questions.
Lai needs to work.
I'm not getting anything out of her.
-Getting what? -Forget it.
Let me be honest, you're a good person.
The merchants here will lose everything.
No one can compete with your prices.
You need to tell me how you do it.
Chao centers all commerce in China.
-Really? -This entire store!
Hi, Mr. Chao.
Keep an eye open for that girl.
Be careful with your daughter, Brazilians are bad.
Specially that Zero Credit.
Black face, he's the worst. Be careful with him.
-Black Face sells well. -Right.
That's why they hired Carlos Eduardo!
Such nonsense.
You voodoo this place and it doesn't work.
They solve their problems with 3 warriors and one something...
My fault? I do what I can to cheer up this place.
No need to cheer up, listen what I'll do.
I'll hang with the Chinese until my eyes get squinted
and my hair gets lank, alright?
Why won't you come out anymore?
Din Din no can talk, Carlos.
What do you mean?
No can!
Then talk to Eduardo.
Don't leave me with such sorrow.
Din Din!
Din Din.
Din Din, I miss you so much.
But Carlos Eduardo and Francis?
We are just friends.
She won't let me eat her yogurt!
-Yogurt? -Yeah.
And won't let me use the remote control!
"Contlol"?
Forget it. I wrote you some verses.
I think you'll like them.
-Verses? -Check it out.
-For me? -For you.
Oh, Din Din,
if you knew how much I want you
the entire world would be Din Din.
-Din Din. -All Din Din.
Din Din.
-Beautiful, Din Din. -Din Din.
Oh, Din Din
If someday you go away
Take me with you, Din Din
Look, Din Din
Stay, Din Din
Din Din!
Man, An dress a?
Do you think I can hook up with that ebony goddess?
I mean to hurt your feelings,
but she's out of your league,
she's too much for you.
I know, I came here for you to help me.
-You're a good talker. - I don't do miracles.
Get me a cachaca and give my student a beer.
We have to figure out something very important.
You want to hook up with An dress a?
I can't think of anything else.
I think of her all day. On the street, on the bus,
in the shower...
Specially in the shower.
First tip,
ask her out.
And you think I haven't?
I've been asking her out for 5 years.
Always the same thing, "Get out of here."
But you have to insist!
Say you want to buy her a beer.
Tell her you just want a friend to talk to.
A friend to talk to?
I like that.
"A friend to talk to" sounds cool.
You're the man.
A friend to talk to, then what?
Then you buy her a gift, got it?
Women like to feel important.
I invite her out to talk, buy her a gift.
What's next?
Then it's up to your talent.
If you want to get her you've got to be smooth.
What's this smooth thing?
That's a myth, it's for soap operas.
Smooth? How?
Being smooth is an art.
It is strength and being gentle.
A firm word in a whisper.
Being smooth is poetry.
You grab her like this,
look her in the eyes,
and tell her the truth.
Got it?
Darn!
That's it.
-Hi. -Hi.
Did you call for me?
Excuse me.
I'm opening a new store.
I need a manager.
Everyone says you're good, you sell well.
I am good.
But I'd be selling a lot more if you hadn't come to my zone.
What?
You don't understand?
You guys breached my beach.
"Bich"?
It's full of Chinese here.
Lots of Chinese. Bad for business.
You don't get it.
Sit down, sir, let me explain.
Chao only understands my business.
And knows you are good at sales.
Thank you.
You are good at sales, good with numbers.
Very "communitacive."
Do you mean, communicative?
Exactly, I am since very little.
I open up, speak a lot.
Yeah...
I'll pay a lot more than your boss!
If you sell more,
you'll earn a lot.
Really?
Good luck comes to women
with a good mind.
I do.
Everyone says I'm smart.
I must be, right?
When can you start?
-It's hot! -Yeah, tea is hot.
How do you hold this?
It's a teacup without the handle.
Yours has a handle, mine doesn't.
You must drink tea hot.
But why? It's already hot in here.
You, manager?
No, my late grandma was called to be manager.
How much will you make?
I'll make 3.3% on every 1.99 I sell, do the math!
Oh, stop it! I mean it!
-Are you going? -I don't know.
How much did he offer you?
A lot more than what I make here.
-I'll talk to Mr. Nazir. -He's just left.
Mr. Nazir?
I'll go and talk to him and solve this right away.
-2 more months? -Yes.
You had said 2 months.
2 plus 2 is 4!
That won't do! I'll look for another store.
Please, Mr. Chao, you must understand,
I can't leave my tenant in the middle of the street.
We need to let him find a spot.
-Why? -Because he's my friend.
Your friend?
Like they say in Brazil,
"Friends are friends and business is business.”
I know, Mr. Chao. But you could make it easier.
You aren't making the price any easier.
-No, because I can't. -Neither can I with a deadline.
If the store isn't mine by Carnaval,
it'll be my problem.
What can I do?
Friend?
Girls?
-Hey, girls. -Hi, Mr. Nazir.
Nazir has a problem.
Is it your health again?
I was going over the stock
and noticed that there's a lot of merchandise missing.
It wasn't me, Mr. Nazir.
-I'm not accusing anyone. -It's the end of the line.
Sales are down, stock being stolen,
that's like beating a dead horse.
In my country they get robbers and cut their hands off.
Here everyone would be one-handed.
But don't worry, I've got my eyes wide open.
When a camel snoozes, you lose.
-A camel? -Everything is camel over there.
I like that look.
Where are you going?
Peri asked me out for a beer.
You decided to give Peri a chance?
No, he just wants to talk to a friend.
Peri is a moron,
but the beer is free.
It'll be a nice pre-night.
-Women are all gold diggers. -No way, bye!
If this were an American movie, you'd stop!
Do you know those movies where a guy gets in a taxi and says,
"Follow that car?
Do just like them! Go! Follow that black car.
There, stay on their tail.
Don't let them see us.
On his tail! Don't miss the light!
Go, sir!
Go ahead.
Load the truck.
Oh, my God! China man, open up!
Help!
An dress a, I invited you here to talk.
I just want to talk to someone.
Cheers.
Let it out, Peri.
An dress a, ...
was a kid who loved the Beatles and the Rolling Stone.
-And sang... -Stop it, Peri.
Alright, the truth.
When I am next to you
my heart races, you know?
My hands begin to shake,
my palms get sweaty.
My body temperature begins to rise.
I feel pain in my joints. I get dizzy.
-That's dengue fever, Peri. -No, it's love!
It's love, madness, passion!
You are the woman of my life! I can see it in your eyes.
Don't you believe in the stars, in the cosmos?
I see our names etched in the stars!
"Forever!" The future owner of St. George's.
I'll make you that woman.
What's that?
For you to get even prettier.
Oh, how gorgeous!
I love it, Peri, thanks! How sweet!
Are you crazy, Peri?
The more I pray, more demons come my way.
What are you laughing at?
She'll be mine, just wait!
Francis, what are you doing here?
Me?
I was in the neighborhood
and decided to take a look.
It's very dangerous here for a woman alone.
- I know. -Very dangerous.
Francis is leaving. Bye, guys.
-Francis. -Yes?
Francis is spying on Chao!
No way!
"Spying" is a heavy word.
I came here 'cause I wanted
to get to know you guys better.
-The Chinese culture. -Say the truth.
The truth is that you are really weird.
I can't understand you.
That's why I'm here. Can I ask you a few questions?
For example, do you really eat dog?
Dog?
Scorpions, cockroaches?
Is the Chinese "thingy" actually horizontal?
Horizontal?
They really don't understand a word.
Forget it. I only want one answer.
Please?
How do those Christmas lights cost only 1.99?
I can't comprehend it!
If I buy a plug at Mr. Salim's, it's 4 bucks.
A meter of wire at Mr. Hashid's is 10 bucks.
If I buy a dozen light, not 40, just a dozen,
at Mr. Nacib's, it's 12 bucks, that's over 20.
A letter to China is more expensive.
How can those Christmas lights cost 1.99?
I don't get it!
China can manufacture things at a lower cost.
Brazil can't.
China works a lot!
You're offending me, I've worked hard since 11.
Brazilians also work hard.
But we cannot compete with those prices!
You're going to bankrupt us all! Like Mr. Nazir.
-Not my problem! -How unpleasant!
What does "unpleasant” mean?
Unpleasant is someone cool.
A really cool person.
You are also a very cool person.
Your lucky that Chao knows Francis.
Let her go.
Bye, thanks! May Buddha be with you.
Oh, my God!
I'll never find out how they sell these lights at 1.99!
I'll stop selling Chinese product and find a way!
-Chinese, really? -Yeah.
I prefer it in a cup.
No, why?
What if the teacup breaks with hot coffee?
-It would burn my belly! -Your belly or worse.
Don't mention it. Keep quiet.
Here.
-What's this? -The rent money.
Ah, yes.
Why didn't you pay at the bank?
I only have half.
Bernard, please!
Please understand, times are tough.
They aren't making commission. I had to pay the girls.
After Christmas, I'll pay you everything.
You have my word.
Nazir, I must tell you something.
We have received an offer of purchase.
-From a Chinese group. -The Chinese!
And you say the Arabs are the victims.
Well, how much time do I have?
If we agree on a value,
we'll have to hand in the building
in March, right after Carnaval.
Din Din do nothing, Carlos colleague.
Din Din want be like woman in Brazil, free!
Din Din want go out and go to beach.
Din Din "Blazilian!" "Calioca" speak Portuguese!
So I'll speak your language!
Get yourself together or he'll send us back to China.
Din Din!
It's beautiful!
Yin yang, opposites attract.
Only if in China, here they attack each other.
It's the "I Ching,"” the book of Chinese wisdom.
Even your voodoo is now made in China!
Everything is Chinese!
I thought you only knew Brazilian spells.
I need to keep myself updated.
Now I'm mixing "I Ching" with aura reading.
-The results are great. -Really?
So, please, check my aura.
-Tell me what's wrong. -Let's see.
I see Christmas with no commission.
Come on, seriously!
You don't need my aura, just check my wallet.
I'm serious, I've never seen such a lame Christmas.
Let me tell you,
I don't think Mr. Nazir will be able to handle it.
Not going to lie, I'm looking for another job.
Really?
-Hi, Mr. Nazir! -Hi, Mr. Nazir!
How long have you been there?
Long enough to know that sometimes
we make of the wolf the guardian of the sheep.
And how about the camel?
The camels too.
We were just mentioning animals. I hope we didn't upset you.
Things are tough, if a miracle doesn't happen
I think you will lose this store.
The Chinese may have all the weapons,
but the Arabs won't leave it unsettled!
Mr. Nazir, are you going to fire us?
No, dear, the best defense is a good offense.
One day of a wise man is worth much more
than an entire ignorant life.
Beautiful, Mr. Nazir! Can I put it on Facebook?
Do whatever you want, dear.
Put it where?
You won't get it.
DECEMBER
Come on in, people!
China man's gone crazy! The right place for cheap stuff!
The cheapest around the corner! This doll is only 8.99!
Almost free! Come on in!
I want to give it away too!
I want to give it away!
Here, take it, the doll, 6.99!
You won't find it any cheaper.
Francis, are you Mrs. Claus or a sorcerer?
I just want to be happy
Sell everything cheap at Mr. Nazir's
And be proud
Of not being a traitor and go selling somewhere else
-You must be kidding. -I don't care, sing away.
Rain falls, the streets flood
The competition is in the mud
Jingle bells, jingle bells prices here fell
-What? -Bye bye, your prices are high
The Dragon is expensive So very expensive
Christmas is at St George's Get out of my sight!
Check out this piggy bank!
Only 3.99, let's fill it up!
His astrological sign is Pig!
But pigs that snore don't bite.
Leave that pigsty, ma'am! The pig here is 2.99!
Lower the price even more!
The Arab is going crazy! It's your chance!
1.99! Buy it and save!
Calm down, there's enough for everyone!
For a girl? Take the car.
-Everyone loves toy cars. -Do we have more of these?
Check out this new edition.
This place is crowded! My stock is running out!
Come on, Black Face.
Black face means strength. Ugly face means hunger.
Be careful, dear, or the dragon will eat you.
Come on in, sir. Here we don't sell jokes.
Flee from the competition to not go zero credit!
At The Dragon we have gifts even for the hard to please!
-Full bed sheets! -Lower the price!
9.99!
-You're in the way, boss. -He didn't rhyme!
-You made me miss a rhyme! -St. George slays The Dragon
-He didn't rhyme! -You're getting in the way.
Get out of here, Dragon, St. George has slain you!
Come on, right in here!
JANUARY
Wow! Look, Francis!
-What? -The Chinese is crying!
-So, what? - I didn't know Chinese cried.
Shut up, An dress a!
Chinese cry, pee, poop, they're people.
A storm is brewing in the East, I'll go check it out!
A woman came in, go.
Din Din.
Din Din!
What's wrong? Are you crying?
Come over here.
What's wrong?
You've been crying, Din Din!
Why, what's wrong?
Din Din is "vely" sad.
What happened?
Din Din no marry Chao, Chao send back to China.
To China, what a pity!
Poor you, having to go back to China.
Din Din want be free!
Go beach, drink beer!
Dump that China man!
Tell Chao "ciao.”
Get out of there. Find yourself a "Blazilian."
A "Blazilian" with money,
not a zero credit like Carlos Eduardo.
Let me introduce you to a very nice guy.
I know a nice guy that you'll like.
Tell Chao "ciao."
-Hey, Peri! -Yeah?
-Come here. -Tell me.
Let me introduce you to Din Din.
Do you remember we talked about her?
Discussing your curiosity.
-That you wanted... -Oh, that!
-Hi, how are you? -That's Peri.
-How's it going? -Okay.
I brought her over because she's sad.
She wants to go to Carnaval, to samba.
She needs company and I thought you could take her.
-That I could take her? -Yes.
-Fran, I prefer more substance. -Come on, Peri.
I'm more into a big steak than kabob.
Please, Peri, I'm asking you.
She's super fun. Right, Din Din?
She'll do anything, rip money, eat crap.
-Anything, right, Din Din? -Anything?
Anything?
-Let's go horizontal? -Yeah, horizontal.
We are in a shithole. Do you want to get in?
See? She agreed.
FEBRUARY
How do you like my Indian costume?
-How do I look? -My goodness!
Very rich! Very luxurious!
But that's not a Brazilian Indian.
Brazilian Indians aren't all that.
I'm finding her a bit too rich!
But for me...
she's a wolf in sheep's clothing.
Can I not wear gold?
Yes you can, but you work at a nearly bankrupt store.
How can you afford it with what you make?
-This was a gift, Mr. Nazir. -A gift, really?
It's either a gift,
or something really strange is going on in here.
Mr. Nazir, are you suspecting me?
Please, Mr. Nazir!
She can be dumb, stupid, clueless,
but she doesn't steal, I vouch for her.
-Thanks, friend. -Ready for the party?
-What's going on? -Peri, talk to your dad.
He doesn't trust me.
Wasn't this all a gift?
-Who gave it to me? -Who?
Who gave it to you?
You? It can't be!
Peri, where did you get the money?
Dad, listen, it was just a bonus.
-Help with expenses. -Bonus is for workers!
You don't do anything! I can't believe this!
I'm sorry, my dear.
You're lucky you're in Brazil!
If we were in my father's homeland, right now,
a scimitar would be cutting your hand off!
Not today. He'll need his hand at the party.
Cut it on Ash Wednesday, alright?
-My dear, I'm really sorry. -It's okay, Mr. Nazir.
-Have fun. - I will!
This is crazy!
Brazil!
Francis! Come here.
Din Din has become the hottest Chinese ever!
Look at that!
You can't notice it's not her butt.
It's hers, she bought it.
I made it, custom-made.
You're jealous of her butt!
Look at all the other Chinese trying to copy her butt.
Stop starring! She's a hit!
Din Din, you're a hit!
Wouldn't you make out with her now, Peri?
Yes, I would.
If certain people
weren't all over her.
Watch out!
-Geez! Look? -Don't start!
Let them have fun, I know Carlos Eduardo is mine.
I'm better than that.
Go! Imagine what she can do in a bedroom.
-It's Carnaval, Peri. -Right on.
Jump in and swap some saliva.
Now that the Chinese has a butt, Carlos Eduardo is after her.
-Come on, An dress a! -I'd keep an eye out.
Where did those 2 go?
Where are they?
Carlos Eduardo, I can't believe this!
-You're here, dear? -I am, but you shouldn't be.
-Din Din is skank! -Din Din is clueless.
Shut up!
Nothing happened, my black babe.
Carlos Eduardo, I'm not your black babe.
I'm not your black babe, and let me tell you something,
to find a woman like me,
there's only one in the world like me.
Now like her there are over 600 million in China alone.
-What's this mess? -My God, what did I do?
My God, what did we do?
This kid must have roof ted me!
Wait, did I hook up with my goddess?
My beautiful Ebony goddess?
Francis, did you get hammered too?
- I got wasted, Mr. Nazir. -My God.
For God's sake, tell me what happened.
Francis, did we do it?
Yes, you did it.
You jumped on An dress a and she slapped you.
-Then you fell over. -Oh, no!
So I didn't hook up with my goddess?
I knew it, I'd never do that to myself.
I would that to myself,
I can feel we hooked up.
In here I know.
Din Din is "Blazilian"! No marry more Chao!
-Din Din is a wild one! -Din Din has big butt!
Look, Zero Credit hooked up with the Chinese ho.
Din Din is "Calioca"!
Carlos Eduardo disappointed me.
Anything a crazy woman cooks,
the blind husband will eat.
What's that, Mr. Nazir?
Francis! Francis!
I have nothing to tell you.
You think I'm hooking up with her?
Do whatever you want.
Creature of God, she got drunk, couldn't understand Chinese.
-Much less Portuguese. -But I know you.
I spent all night thinking about you.
Me too.
-Because you love me. -No, I hate you!
But nothing happened between us!
Carlos Eduardo did Din Din!
That's not true!
What's going on?
Listen,
no more marry this girl.
Din Din lose virginity to that black face!
Din Din stays in Brazil! Carlos Eduardo did Din Din!
For God's sake!
-Did you sleep with her? -No.
No, Mr. Nazir, sleeping isn't what they did.
-I did nothing with Din Din! -Carlos banged Din Din!
-You got screwed, brother. -I didn't bang anyone.
Watch out, China man.
I know Kung Fu. Black Lee!
You ruined my wedding.
For God's sake!
Stop screwing around in my store!
-Hey, Mr. Bruce! -Get black face!
-Mr. Nazir, are you okay? -No, I'm not.
I'm innocent, sir!
-Speak up. -I'm innocent!
-You're innocent? -Arrest Carlos Eduardo.
-He's bad! -What's going on?
He spent the night with this girl.
He had sex with minor, must go arrested.
I am married, Din Din got wasted and passed out.
So you like hanging out with young girls?
-Come on, sir. -Come on to the station.
I'm not a thief!
Wait up, Pereira!
-How long do I know you? -What do you want?
He's a worthless good-for-nothing!
-Are you crazy? -You're all that!
But what you said isn't true.
He spent the night with me.
That's not true, Francis lies.
Don't sweat it, Chao. I have a witness.
-Where? -Right, An dress a?
What?
Didn't I spend the night with Carlos Eduardo
at Mr. Jorge's house?
-With Carlos Eduardo? -Yes, tell them, An dress a.
Yes, you did.
Take off his bracelet. You've got a strong saint.
Now listen, Carnaval is over.
Everybody get a move on.
Get out of here!
Everyone leave!
Get out!
Chinese! Brazilian!
What's with wanting to hit others?
Bad people. Get off me!
Do you know what's the only true thing I said?
That you're a worthless good-for-nothing.
Looking at this empty chair makes me uneasy.
But he's doing better, right?
He'll spend some more time at the hospital,
but soon enough he'll be back.
-With St. George's power. -God willing.
And what will happen to all this, to us?
Francis, I'm not going to lie to you,
I think we will have to close.
Don't say that, Peri, you'll make me cry.
Seeing Mr. Nazir in the hospital is bad enough.
How long have I worked here?
I can't believe this!
After everything that happened, look who showed up.
What is this?
Doctor say Din Din virgin.
Carlos Eduardo no did Din Din.
-Din Din lie to stay in Brazil. -Seriously?
-He's actually innocent. -Really? Let me see.
Without visa Din Din can't stay in Brazil.
-Chao sending us back to China. -That's too bad!
-Poor you. -That's too bad!
Din Din, if you marry a "Blazilian,"”
like, Peri, Din Din stay in Brazil?
-She's yours, Peri. -Yeah, sure.
Finally, Peril!
Finally leaving the stable!
I love St. George!
An dress a big butt.
-Din Din want be like An dress a. -What?
Every Chinese wants to have a big butt like yours.
That's it, An dress a! Got it?
No.
Hey, Nelsinho!
Mr. Bernard!
Mr. Bernard.
-Any news on Mr. Nazir? -Your friend needs you.
What happened?
Did you sell the store to Mr. Chao?
I'm here, guys!
Hey, guys!
May all this become tits and butts.
Nelsinho, I'm so happy I'll give you some change.
OUT TO LUNCH
My God! Only in Saara!
APRIL
-Long live St. George! -Long live!
Long live!
-Lots of people. -Lots of people and faith.
Faith on the warrior.
The rich and the poor come here.
They can all relate to him.
Specially those that deal with weapons.
The police, you know.
Excuse me.
Thieves too.
-Thieves? -Yeah, see his gun.
-"Pliest™? -He's not a priest.
The priest is over there.
He's a type of Candomblé priest.
Do you have voodoo in China? No, right.
To him, from Rio, St. George is Ogum.
But there's lots of people from Bahia.
They're all here from Bahia
because to them St. George is Oxossi, the hunter, got it?
And the Jews too?
There are lots of Jews that come to voodoo.
Specially for bounced checks.
I prefer asking St. Expedite for that.
I don't get it.
-It's too confusing. -Confusing, right?
Confusing, no understand anything.
Brazil is like that.
It's a bit of a mix.
-A lot of a mix. -Very mixed, all bunched up.
You'll get used to it, that's how things are here.
Even without understanding, just pray for him.
Ask for something that you really want.
He's a strong saint.
-Right, my dear? -Strong?
Yes, strong, look at him and ask for something.
OPENING
-Mr. Nazir! -Hey, dear!
I'm so glad you're here!
The Saara isn't the same without you.
-I'm glad. -I'm happy, excited.
I missed you. Feeling brand new?
-I'm as strong as a camel. -That's great!
-What's that? -Do you like it?
I should've told you earlier, but...
What are all the Chinese doing in front of the store?
It's the way I found to save our store and our heads.
How's the heart?
It's okay.
Hold your horses, I have more surprises inside.
-Oh, my God. -Come on!
-Come on. -I'm going!
Did you ever imagine our store like this?
Boosting, crowded.
I don't even know what to say.
We have everything the Chinese girls want,
tight clothes, manicure, hair dresser,
and even a tanning booth.
-Welcome, Mr. Nazir. -An dress a?
We offer the Oriental girls
the best of the Western girls.
In this case, tits and butt.
Look at this.
Look, Mr. Nazir!
This place is crowded! The Chinese are so happy!
They went crazy over the padded jeans.
-Mrs. Lai! -Hi, Mr. Nazir, how are you?
I prayed a lot to St. George for you to get better.
-St. George? -She loved the church!
What does that mean?
It's a Chinese proverb,
it means, first fight, then friends.
Come look at this. Say it, Din Din.
Din Din is now a big butt Brazilian.
A big butt Brazilian. Check it out.
Wonderful!
All products 100% Brazilian, as you always wanted.
I don't know what to say. This place is wonderful!
How did you manage to do all this?
You were a great teacher, I owe it all to you.
But I had help, come and see from whom.
Whom?
Mr. Nazir, come and see who's here.
It's a surprise.
-Bernard! -Nazir, give me a hug.
How great! Now we are partners.
-Partners? -Imagine that.
An Arab and a Jew making money off the Chinese.
-Only in Brazil! -Not only Brazil.
It's all ours now. We'll become millionaires.
Like Dad used to say,
"Never say the stars are dead,
just because the sky is cloudy.”
Please, let me through.
Come on, let me through.
Let me talk to my queen.
Francis! Francis!
-Let me in! -Stay away, Carlos Eduardo.
Butts for export!
Francis, Francis!
Come on, Francis.
Forgive me, Francis.
I know you can call me coward
-What a joke. -You'd better keep an eye out.
-Get down there. -No, I'm not.
I'm not going!
Someone who's never been hurt before
Oh, my God! It's my song.
-Don't do this to me. -Follow your intuition.
Let it happen. I'll get more pants.
And so I'm always suffering
Singing our song isn't fair.
- I have nothing to give -You're killing me.
So I'll do it I want you all to myself
Like the waves belong to the sea
I can no longer live like that
Wanting you without touching you
-Marry me, Francis. -Listen.
If I say yes, there are all those witnesses.
You have to promise
you'll never eat my yogurt without asking again!
You'll never leave the toilet seat up again!
You'll never leave a wet towel on the bed again!
You'll never grab my TV remote...
There you go, man!
Mr. Chao, listen up.
Here, the band plays another tune.
Brazil has no Chinatown, no divided corners.
Here everyone is together.
Got it? Here we're mixed up!
Open your eyes!
Subtitles: DREI MARC Tradutora: Stella Klujsza