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In today's episode of our series Where Are They Now?: Tomek Wilczyński!
Invisible for ages, so where is he? And has anyone found his body?
Nah, come on. He's definitely alive, selling himself on Dedykacja.pl
For a couple hundred, he'll send you his wishes.
That's not all.
The host of the controversial
and once-popular The World According to Wolf
is supposedly working on a new show.
Will this be a triumphant return of Wolf to TV?
My question is, is anyone even waiting for that?
Anyway, I wonder where he's been hiding the last few years.
Wolf? Maybe in the woods.
You have to admit, Marcel has good taste.
I'm really curious about this new project.
Well, that's not the only project you'll have to work on.
Perfect.
Listen, can't we for once do it just like that?
-Like what? -Like, for pleasure?
Nope.
Okay.
BABY+
DEDYKACJA.PL YOU HAVE TWO ORDERS
Majeczka! All the best from Wolf!
Don't worry, 50 is a beautiful age.
All the repulsive men will finally stop checking you out.
SEND WISHES
May your dreams come true.
Except for the one with the naked priest, right?
Kisses!
YOU RECEIVE 500 PLN DEDYKACJA.PL
Another satisfied customer?
-I hope it's not the last one today. -This is some kind of e-prostitution.
Maybe I should let them put me in the cage and smash my face?
Yeah, right. It's total exploitation. 500 for a few minutes of work.
Very funny. I really feel like a commodity.
Right. Sorry, love, but my fertility window has opened,
so we're on a tight schedule to make this work.
Couldn't we have asked the bellhop for help?
I'm not paying some twit five Euros to carry my bags for 30 seconds.
My back is about to snap after that flight.
You birthed children, you'll cope.
Well?
Which way now, Magellan?
Come.
Here, look.
Voilà!
Get in, mama!
-Ti-da-ri-ra! -Ti-da-ri-ra.
-Hey… -Try the other way.
The other way what?
-You broke it. -I broke it? You broke it.
Wait, it's stuck.
Tomek, slow down.
Ania? What are you doing here?
-It's obvious. -And you?
-Hey. -Hi, Tomuś.
Champagne?
-But this is number six. -Nine.
Okay. Never mind.
Why didn't you tell us you're coming? Marcel didn't say anything. Did he?
We flew with a different airline to avoid 5G towers.
What?
They spread COVID, don't you know?
So we took a 10-hour flight just to avoid 5G?
Marcel.
Hi. At last.
-We'll come back to this. -Where can we find you?
Marcel!
Look at you, man!
I'm so glad to see you.
Hey!
I know that you're all wondering
why I brought you here.
-Right? -Exactly.
But before…
Before I explain everything, let me introduce someone to you.
Miguel.
Kalimera.
It's a pleasure to finally meet you all. Marcel told me a lot about you.
Bogdan. Ola.
Ola.
Ania.
-Tomek. -S'up?
And Bogdan.
So, we're sitting in one of the best restaurants in Malta
when I realize that if I don't find a home for this cute dog, no one else will.
And that was the end of the romantic dinner on the beach.
We spent the next four hours looking for a dog shelter on the island.
I was worried that Marcel would never forgive me.
That was the moment I realized that I'd found someone really special.
I mean, who else would walk away from a two-star restaurant?
Miguel!
It sounds like an old-Polish name from the Gniezno and Poznań region, right?
Actually, it's Michał.
-Ha! Michał? -Miguel stuck over the years.
I like it.
Marcel, Zosia says hi. Sadly, she couldn't come.
-I know. How's the baby? -I have new photos. Wanna see?
Yeah.
Miguel, after all these travels, are you planning to move in with Marcel
in Warsaw?
You didn't tell them?
Didn't tell us what?
Oh no!
-I ruined the surprise, did I? -No, relax.
What surprise?
I love surprises.
Miguel and I are staying on the island.
What?
As in…
We bought this hotel.
Kalós írthate, my dears.
With what?
Hold on.
You sold all your properties in Warsaw?
Yes. I needed money for the down payment. It was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
-Kalimera, Mr. Marcel. -Kalimera.
Guantanamera.
Marcel, when you said you were working on a new project,
I was convinced you meant an awesome TV show,
not buying a hotel in the Greek boondocks!
It's both. I mean, two in one.
We're making a new reality show.
People meet online and then in real life, on a romantic island.
You host the show, it pays the mortgage, everyone's happy.
-I just have to convince the investor. -Marcel.
This is so unlike you.
You always had everything well-organized, but now you're acting irrationally.
Why irrationally?
You disappear to the far end of the world with a random dude you met when?
Merely a few months ago.
Marcel, have you completely lost the plot?
Buying a hotel you can't afford to make a show you can't produce? Marcel.
Besides, what idiot would invest in something like this?
Hello?
Hi.
Great.
Yes. Talk to you tomorrow.
Bye.
Who was that?
The moron who wants to invest in our show, Planet Single: Island.
-No. -Island!
PLANET SINGLE ISLAND
Of course, the lying media want you to believe that it's
just a normal millionaire's vacation.
People, come on!
There's no mention of the fact
that the guy's been travelling for months, buying land from Crete to Madeira.
Why is he doing that?
He'll be erecting new weather control towers.
Exactly. That's why the weather in Poland is unbearable.
-Stop it! -Weather changing towers?
Stop it!
5G signals?
What other conspiracy theories will you come up with?
-Maybe UFO? -It's not UFO. Give it a break.
It's UAP, okay?
Unnormal Aerial Paranoic, get it? Besides, let me tell you this.
The US government officially admitted
that for the last 50 years, they've been using alien technology.
Bodzio, come on. Do you even remember that you're a school principal?
I take you on a trip to such a beautiful place and you?
You don't even see where you live. You live in an illusory world.
In the Matrix. Time to wake up, woman.
-Illusory? What are you on about? -Yes. If you don't wake up, you're done.
You'd know if you read or browsed the web,
but you just go, "Buy me this, get me that."
Give it.
-Come on, don't-- -You want to browse?
There. I'll shove that phone up my ass, maybe then you'll notice me,
you old fart with a belly, sitting like this.
Hey.
Have you noticed
that Miguel is kind of weird?
Totally.
He's charming,
handsome, and has a good sense of humor.
Let's not exaggerate. He's not that funny.
Jealous much?
No, just worried about my buddy. What do we even know about this guy?
Just shut up and kiss me.
-Do you think he's from Warsaw? -Who?
Tomek.
I have a window.
Okay.
If you want to learn more about Miguel, then go and ask him.
Now kiss me.
Genius!
-Not now! -Why not? Now is the best time.
-No! -He's not expecting me.
Get it? Just the two of us, tête-à-tête.
Genius! I love you.
Miguel.
Let's talk. You and I, Miguel.
Hey, man-to-man. Come on.
Hi, love. Marcel went to pick up the supplies.
Are you free?
This stays between us.
-Hey. -Hey.
-Hi. -What are you doing here?
Ola threw my phone out. Why are you lurking?
-Anything interesting? -Where?
There.
What? Nah, I came out, you know…
to get some air.
Okay.
-Done? -Yeah. See you.
See you what? Let's grab a drink at the bar.
-Sure, but not today. The heat got to me. -Come on! We're on vacation.
We'll have a drink and seafood. Let's go.
Here's the North Pole and here's the ice wall.
The dome, made of the atmosphere and gases trapped between them, works like a lens
and creates an illusion of roundness of the actually flat Earth.
Listen, have you noticed that he's been acting weird recently?
Marcel?
Marcel sleeps with guys, that's weird in itself.
No, look. He sold everything he had.
He hid away in the middle of nowhere with a guy he's known how long?
Six months?
Do you know how they met?
Through a dating app.
This reminds me of a situation from a documentary The Planet Bandit.
-Have you heard of it? -No.
It's on Netflix. You have to watch it. A huge scandal!
It's about a guy who meets women through an app, bedazzles, and robs them.
He takes it all, including their savings. Everything.
He's elusive, still hasn't been caught. You have to watch it.
The Planet Bandit.
That's right.
He told me, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He was so handsome and charming.
He even convinced me to mortgage one of my properties in Malibu.
The Planet Bandit operates on an international scale,
enamoring wealthy, lonely women from Malta to Macedonia.
But over time, all of them discover that instead of passionate love
and a soulmate,
they're left with broken hearts and empty bank accounts.
Ridiculous.
Excuse me?
I wanted to get some tan
but all I want now is to buy baby sleepers.
Weird, right?
I know what you mean.
Do you have kids?
Sadly, it's not in my cards.
-Sorry for prying. -It's ancient history.
The best kids are other people's kids.
Maximum pleasure,
minimum responsibility.
I'm Ania, by the way.
Maria.
Like a fairytale.
So that's how it is. Serpent.
With a new friend, the old one is no longer important.
Kalimera.
-One. -One? Follow me, please.
No, frail people over there.
What? Gray?
Relax, Zeus. I'll get tanned.
Hello. Magda.
Hello.
Ola.
Hey, love.
Sorry you had to wait. Sincere apologies.
-Hi. -Ready?
Yes, come.
Let's go.
Chop, chop.
Tomek?
What are you--
Damn. Turn off the music.
Marcel, honey.
Are you playing Tarzan?
At the hotel? Of course I remember.
I'll be there soon.
We'll have to do it later.
-I followed Miguel. -Right.
He met up with some guy, and now he paid another guy to undress.
See? He's scouting for new victims. The Planet Bandit scammed many people.
-It's a Ponzi scheme. -What baloney--
Shush!
Dude.
What?
The Planet Bandit scammed women, right?
-Right. -And Marcel is…
-Gay! Do I have to draw you a diagram? -How do you know?
Maybe he's bisexual, demisexual, trisexual?
There are 68 sexual identities, according to Facebook.
Where did you get this number?
What do you mean, you're on the island? Since when?
No way.
Leave Marcel out of this.
Let's talk in private.
There are 68 sexual identities.
He can be any of them.
The yacht of the recluse billionaire Aleksander Ostrowski,
the owner of Planet Single,
has been seen today off the coast of Crete.
To recap, a few years ago,
his then partner, Anna Kwiatkowska, rejected his marriage proposal
and soon after married showman Tomek Wilczyński,
leading to Ostrowski's withdrawal from the limelight.
Welcome.
What's your first impression?
Well, it seems small.
But there's potential.
Aren't we waiting for your friends?
Nah, they're here for the casting.
They already scored a few points.
Casting? So soon?
Time is money. Most of them are already at the hotel.
Haven't you noticed how many people arrived this week?
I thought they were tourists.
I'll be honest with you.
There's no drama here.
Love, feelings, communication, it's all great.
But who cares? What's the point watching that?
Imagine this.
Sexy couples, alone on a desert island,
competing to steal each other's partners.
Now that's a show.
Yeah, but it seems that we'd be rewarding people
for dishonesty and infidelity.
Exactly.
"Happily ever after" is a myth.
It's boring. Nobody wants to watch those happily in love.
The algorithm data says so.
We want to provoke changes.
-Inspire the viewers. -Marcel. Don't make it difficult.
It's done. The promo campaign starts in a few days.
It'll be a big event.
Event?
Promo campaign?
Why do you think I invited people to the casting?
Reporters, red carpet, you know. It'll be hot!
It's the organizer.
Hello?
How's everything?
The organizer? Who are we then?
I think we should reconsider.
I'll convince him.
So, here's the situation. On the one hand, we have two handsome guys.
On the other, there's a stranger on the phone, right?
Sounds like a gay porn script.
Right. I understand all that, but I don't get Alexander's role in this.
-I know he controls the weather but… -What?
-Demar-- -Controls the weather?
Never mind. Dematabilizes, whatever.
Dude.
It's all about the fact that…
Miguel is definitely cheating on Marcel and I need proof of that, get it?
Not you, us. We have to be partners.
Because you can't do it on your own.
We'll be like Clooney and Pitt, get it? I'll be Clooney.
Ola!
There you are. I've been looking for you everywhere.
The sun.
You might have noticed me
if you weren't so intrigued by your new friends on the other side.
No way. You saw me and didn't come over?
Listen, Maria is very nice. You'd like her.
I don't care about your Maria. Besides, I have a new friend too.
Maybe Magdalena will answer my calls,
be nice to me, and sometimes make an effort.
-It's not like that. -What's it like then?
-Not like that. -Girls!
You're on a beautiful island, the sun is shining, you're surrounded by…
so many fantastic guys that are easy on the eye.
Why argue?
Besides,
at some point, your husbands will die, and you will only have each other.
Life's so short.
Okay.
Here's what we'll do.
I'll say, "I'm sorry."
It's okay.
And we'll go out tonight. Just the two of us.
-Without the old farts? -Without.
Ladies night, like in the good old days?
Wait, what's "sweet" in Greek? Taglita?
I don't know.
Jeez, it's so beautiful here!
And? Can you see anything?
Nah. It's too far away.
Try this.
Son of a gun! What a scumbag. He's looking for new victims.
Damn philanderer.
-Show me. -What?
Why do you need so many binoculars?
For bird watching.
-You brought a sandwich? -We're on a stakeout, okay?
Aren't they too young?
-Chill your cheeks. -Polish girls?
-Polish girls. -Polish girls!
Watch out, he's coming! Hide!
Okay.
What now?
-The window is open. -What?
-We have to find out what's in his laptop. -I'm not breaking into his room.
I'll give you a boost. Do you want to know if he's the Planet Bandit or not?
-I do. -Let's go.
Okay.
When you're inside, open the back door for me.
-Okay. -Let's go.
To the Polish girls.
-Yiamas! -Yiamas!
Damn, a password.
LOG IN MARCEL'S B-DAY
There's a hint. Birthd-- I know.
Sneaky!
-Bingo. -Well done!
This guy buys more stuff on Etsy than my aunt.
Okay, here's a chat app.
You slimy reptile!
A total scumbag.
Got him.
"Let's meet at the winery tomorrow…"
-Jesus! -Let's go!
-The closet. -What are you talking about?
No, I'm not. I'm not avoiding you at all.
But I asked you not to call this number ever again.
What don't you understand?
It's over.
You have to accept it.
Listen. Of course I will always love you.
But the rules have changed.
Are you threatening me?
I really thought you're better than that.
I have to go. Bye.
Marcel, honey. Hey.
Yes. Everything's okay.
I'm just having a very busy day.
You dirty boy.
Yeah? Is that what you want?
And what else?
Tell me about it.
And I've been a vegan ever since.
I love animals.
I mean, I eat fish, right?
Sometimes chicken.
Steak, once in a while. But just for protein.
-Besides that, I'm totally vegan. -Very noble.
Your palm says that you're a very lively girl.
It does?
But kind of, I don't know, lost?
Are you drinking this?
-Here. -Fucking awesome.
One minute.
Excuse us for a moment.
Hey! He was telling my fortune.
Ola, can we blow them off,
sit down somewhere and…
you know, talk?
We came to dance and you're fussing about. Don't you like your guy?
We can find you a different one.
Ola, they're morons. I have to listen about chicken not being meat.
Don't be picky. They're all right.
Check this out!
I know that you like when I dominate, but…
maybe let's switch the roles tonight?
If you want, you can even call me Tomek.
I'm just kidding.
Okay, stud.
Now I really need a cold shower.
See you at dinner.
And after, we'll have…
a special dessert.
-Bye. -Jeez, what does Marcel see in him?
Dude, wait.
We have to check if he has the Planet Single app on his phone.
Damn, he doesn't. Maybe he has two phones?
Wait, let me see.
Where are his recent calls? Here.
-That's my number. -Yeah. It's an old trick.
They think they're chatting with Miguel but they're texting us.
-Yeah. -Wait.
Let's find out who the mysterious Don Pedro is.
-The spa. -At 10 p.m.
Okay, no clothes, no hidden weapons.
-Let's go. -Okay. Leave it.
Hey! I didn't delete the last message. Delete it.
Wait.
I'll make a dietary plan for you, if you want.
-I can do that, you know? -Great.
I can make a--
Okay. Maybe later.
Keep dancing, okay?
Okay.
-I'll be right back. -Andrew!
Maria!
Wait.
Remember me?
-Sure. -Ania.
Looks like the party is really getting started.
Classic Ola.
It starts innocent and before you know it, the gates of hell swing open.
Ania?
Ania!
Don't you get what's going on? Miguel's ex is on the island.
And we're about to prove that he's cheating.
How do you know it's an ex? Planet Bandit can't have acted alone.
He needed accomplices to scam so many people.
So, you know. It could be both.
Stop straining your brain so much.
Give me this.
What have you done? You've completely used up the battery.
It was your idea to use my cell phone.
Shush. I'll figure something out. Follow me.
Ania!
Are you having fun?
Ola, what happened to you?
You'd know if you didn't ditch me again.
Ola, I didn't ditch you. I'm just talking. Have you met Maria?
-Hi, I've heard a lot about you. -You know what?
This was supposed to be our night.
Like in the good old days.
You didn't call, text, nothing for six months!
Tell me, is this being my best friend?
-Half a year? Good reason to get mad. -Whose side are you on?
-Stay out of this! -Girls, no need to get vexed.
Let's go for a long, romantic walk--
-You're out. Now! -That's right.
I've been dragging you out to people my whole life!
I've been dragging you out to parties, so you didn't have to be alone!
-You want to party? -Yes, please!
So we're going to party.
Maybe if I get drunk…
I'll be more like you.
You see,
I'd actually like to be…
more like you.
Maybe then I'd become a mom.
Because it's not happening when I'm myself.
But…
-Jesus! -No!
Paradise!
Let's focus.
Right.
What's the plan, Sherlock?
First, we have to check out everyone with a cell phone.
Okay.
Watch out.
Let's split up.
Where are you? I've been waiting for 15 minutes. Call me.
This is highly unprofessional. I'm waiting in the massage room.
Tomek!
Tomek?
Aleksander?
You're late.
You know who sent me, right?
My name is…
Bernardo.
There's been a mistake. You're not my type.
You're not my type either.
But you know why we're here?
A true professional.
I like that.
How about if, before we get down to business,
we get to know each other?
With pleasure.
Start with my shoulders.
Marcel surprised me a bit at the beginning.
But it makes sense.
Your show hires the entire resort from him.
Marcel gets free publicity and money.
You get the venue together with the best director in the industry.
-And everyone is happy. -Yeah.
Just tell me, what does Miguel get out of this?
You don't know?
I don't.
Tell me, how long has this been going on?
This isn't my first time, if that's what you mean.
-There were others? -Many.
Where?
The usual. Bangkok, Egypt.
Szczecin.
Marcel had only two conditions.
First, you'll host the show.
Second, he and Miguel will be equal partners.
What?
I tried to talk him out of it.
Business and pleasure is a bad combination.
As you know, I've learned that myself.
Still hurts, does it?
No. I don't hold a grudge.
Ania and I…
It wouldn't work.
I know it now.
Poor men. What did they do to you?
You want details?
I want to know everything, okay?
Every single place, name, hustle, and the total.
Well, that could take a while.
Fine.
We've got time.
UNKNOWN NUMBER
What's going on?
You haven't touched anything.
You know, I've been… wondering whether…
this show is too much of a hassle.
We should quit all this and leave.
It's a bit too late for this. The mortgage won't pay itself.
I know, Marcel. I just don't want you to feel let down.
I don't want you to be disappointed.
Do you remember the first place we… visited here?
Mount Juktas.
The destination for couples in love.
The unhappy ones jump off the cliff,
and the happy couples vow love until death do them part.
Here's my star.
Aleks, where have you been hiding?
Tomek, Danuta.
I know you.
Aren't you the guy from Dedykacja.pl?
Tomek used to be a TV star.
-Before they invented the Internet? -Yeah. Back in Chaplin's time.
Wow! Did you work with him?
Right.
Duty calls. Let's go.
Say hi to Ania.
You know, when I saw you behind the railing back then, I…
I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
All I needed was one look.
One glance at the island.
This is the place of my dreams.
And the person I can share it with.
I never said it would be easy.
But I know that in the end it will be worth it.
And as our sweaty bodies writhed in ecstasy…
Salazar leaned towards my ear
and whispered in his charming Moroccan accent,
"And that's the little death, darling."
I'd never had an orgasm like that before.
Bernardo! This was amazing. A confession and massage in one.
I'll recommend you to my girlfriends.
Better not. Today's my last day.
That's a shame.
I'm here. A massage for Ms. Magda?
Thank you, I'm good.
Bernardo?
Bogdan.
Sorry.
One question, if I may.
Why would such a wonderful woman like you pay for sex?
Sex is easy, love is hard.
A young, attractive guy appears out of nowhere.
He talks to you, adores you, admires you.
He seeks your company.
You feel attractive again.
The Planet Bandit knew that too.
-You know The Planet Bandit? -Of course I do.
All my friends have seen it and let me tell you, it's kind of our…
joint fantasy.
But they lost their fortunes. He stole everything from them.
Come on!
They exaggerated for dramatic effect.
Half of my friends spend more in one night at the casino.
I'm curious about something else.
He didn't sleep with any of them.
A romantic?
Emotionally unavailable?
Perfection?
Jeez!
How did I not think of that myself?
-He's gay. -Stop talking nonsense.
Well, excuse me.
The Planet Bandit scammed women in Malta.
He's gay.
Miguel and Marcel met in Malta.
Miguel's accomplice was meant to be at the spa. Aleksander was there.
What? You think Aleksander is Miguel's accomplice?
Think who, apart from Miguel and Marcel, will gain the most from this show?
-Right. Aleksander. -No.
You.
Aleksander can produce 300 shows like that
with younger and better hosts than you.
But he wants you specifically.
You want me to believe that one of the richest guys in Europe
hired Miguel to pick up Marcel to get back at me
for stealing his girlfriend ages ago?
Wow. That's even better than what I've got.
Man.
-What are you doing? -Shush!
Bogdan, what's going on?
They're listening to us, get it? There are cameras everywhere.
Did you know that Aleksander
has been buying stretches of land from Peloponnese to the Suez Canal?
And that they bought a company called OVM?
They'll produce our show.
And have you ever wondered why the weather in Poland is so bad?
-Because it's in Poland? -No.
Because they also own The Weather Channel.
Bogdan.
You believe that people control the weather?
That Miguel is the Planet Bandit
and Aleksander is his boss?
I am concerned.
Honestly, I'm concerned that you're in a serious mental health crisis, Bogdan.
Out of respect for you, let me just say that I can't cope with this.
Sorry.
YOU'RE IN FOR IT NOW
Okay, so explain this.
Here! Why is he giving money to that guy?
You can't even see that person. I don't know. Maybe it's a plumber.
-We've been having problems. -This is the proof. As clear as can be.
What proof? There's nothing here!
What's your problem?
I'm worried about you! I don't want you to end up in hot water.
As always.
You're worried about me or yourself?
Tomek.
Don't make me choose between the two of you.
I'm glad you now talk to each other.
We had no choice. We carried you two kilometers to your room.
I'm sorry.
No worries. That's what girlfriends are for.
Plus, the juicy details about Bogdan.
It was worth it.
Dull, more like.
We still know nothing about you. What is such a doll doing here alone?
I'm after a new adventure.
Any requirements?
Right now, I don't know…
I want something nice and simple.
Like?
Someone rich. No strings attached.
Or at least someone who… doesn't live with his mom.
-And has more than two brain cells. -We'll have to clone Bogdan.
We'll show you the Eagle Claw technique.
Here. Go for the eyes.
We then move on to the next element, the knockdown.
We enter with our hip, right here.
The Eagle Claw?
Come on, that's just regular judo. It won't work in real life.
So that went to shit. He wouldn't listen. Now I'm the worst friend in the world.
No way.
Miguel has a meeting at the winery.
-Come, we'll get him there. -Good luck.
-You're not coming? -Of course not.
After yesterday? No, thanks.
Why? Did I say something wrong?
I thought we were partners, but you showed what you think of me.
Listen.
-I got carried away, okay? -I have feelings too.
Do I have to get on my knees and apologize?
I was running around naked because of your stupid ideas.
And what you made me do in Miguel's room? People go to prison for that.
Hello! Who let whom in from the back? You let me, right?
Yes, but it was meant to be quick. Wham, bam, done.
-But as always, it went ass-backward. -Now you're embarrassed?
I saw how excited you were that for once you could do something different.
Listen. I'm sorry, okay?
I'm sorry.
I could see that you were trying.
-I appreciate it, okay? -I forgive you.
I do.
But I want you to know that it really matters to me.
Right. High five.
I'm sorry to interrupt,
but it's wonderful to see a couple talking through the issues.
You're totally cute.
-Can we go now? -Yes.
Thank you.
Rough night?
I've heard you were on the island.
I was worried you were avoiding me.
You? Never.
No way. You really date only…
through an app?
Yup.
It's like constant market research.
It's not very romantic.
Who said it has to be romantic?
Jeez, do you know how many terrible blind dates I've been on?
With an app, everything is crystal clear.
-The relationships are simple and honest. -Transactional.
That's what makes it honest.
Jeez, what happened to the guy who believed in true love?
Who wanted to help everyone find their soulmate.
-I think we both know the answer to that. -No.
We both know that I wasn't right for you.
Okay.
Let's say that back then I was a naive guy with big plans,
who didn't quite get how the world works.
But now I do.
I've got to say that I miss
your unwavering optimism.
-So do I. -Excuse me?
Never mind.
You know what?
Don't stop searching for true love.
I know, times have changed.
But you've changed less than you think.
Sorry to disturb you,
but I just received your notes about the format of our show.
And?
I understand that sex and infidelity are currently on top.
But we could change this trend.
-Let's not go for inferiority. -Marcel, you're talking about Poles.
Poles love to watch things that make them feel awful.
I have data on this.
Have you seen the trailer?
-Trailer? -Yup.
AI is power.
20 SINGLES ONE ISLAND
ZERO RULES ZERO CLOTHES
LOVE OR BETRAYAL?
PLANET SINGLE: ISLAND
-Why are they all bold these days? -Wait. Show me.
PROFILE-69 ACCEPT?
This one looks cool.
-Ola! Are you crazy? -She has to practice.
With a random guy?
Girls, I really know how to operate this.
Wow, he's fast.
Sneaky rascal.
Is this supposed to be a greeting? Times really have changed.
-It shouldn't look like that. -That should be treated.
Tell him to go see a doctor.
Pass.
The original Single Planet was a success because it was based on love.
On hope that love can be found, and on faith that it can last forever.
Maybe in the past.
Before the algorithms.
Poor thing, she looks lost.
She needs to be shown the way.
TOGETHER ON ONE PLANET MARIA, ALEKSANDER
ALEKSANDER ACCEPTED THE INVITATION
Oh my God! Girls, we've got it!
He accepted?
What should I reply?
-You had 92% compatibility with him. -What are your interests?
Chopin, Bergman… Ask him if he read the latest Tokarczuk.
Ania, she's supposed to flirt, not write a fucking PhD thesis.
Okay, whatever.
What did he say? Show me.
-He's funny. -He is.
Hello?
Say you like it too.
Are you stressed?
No, this isn't my first time.
Good.
Shall we wait?
No point. Anka's on her way with Marcel.
Follow me.
Hey, let's do the good and bad cop.
-I've always wanted to be the bad-- -Shush!
Okay. On my signal.
May I?
Okay.
We're going in.
We have doors.
-Can I loosen it up? -It should be tighter, love.
That's too tight for me.
I don't want to rip it.
Jesus, I can't listen to this.
Listen.
Perfect. We're going in.
Come.
There we go! Having fun?
-What are you doing here? -Nah.
We're asking questions here.
Does Marcel know about your secret meetings?
Marcel doesn't know, and I'd rather it stayed this way.
Oops, too late.
What's going on here?
Marcel, sweetie, I'll explain everything.
Yeah. Why don't you start from the fact that you paid this guy for copulation?
-That's not true. -No?
He's a musical artist.
We were trying on the costume.
And the paid service…
covers decorations he's been working on since yesterday.
Cute!
Miguel.
Were you…
going to propose to me?
Your Honor…
guilty as charged.
Marcel, don't believe him. He's lying like a rug.
Marcel, there's a second guy!
The photographer?
Sorry for being late. I forgot the album.
Good you're here.
This is our journey from our first date until now.
It's beautiful.
You really like it?
It's divine!
But he's a scammer. He's a…
He's…
He's the Planet Single Bandit! The Planet Bandit. Bogdan can tell you.
-Tell them, Bogdan. -No.
Listen, dude--
You be quiet! Marcel. Don't you see what's going on?
He planned everything from the very beginning.
From your first meeting in Malta. He made you fall in love with him.
He convinced you to sell everything and buy this resort.
And the wedding? What does he need it for?
-To take over half of your estate! -Tomek.
Enough! I'm not going to passively watch how my best friend is being scammed!
Enough!
My whole life
I've been helping you fulfill your desires.
Your dreams.
Always putting mine on the sidelines.
Have you ever asked me what I really want?
No.
I never held that against you. I never regretted it.
Until now.
Marcel, wait!
Marcel!
Shame on you.
God, I'm such an idiot.
You're not alone.
Some partner you are.
You said you'd have my back but you just stood there.
I'm sorry.
Confrontations like that overwhelm me. They're not for me. I'm too sensitive.
Whatever. It's just another of my many failures.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You're a famous celebrity.
-You lead a totally different life. -A celebrity? A diminishing one.
You know how much savings I've got? I'm a step away from applying for social.
This project is my last chance. The only thing I have in the pipeline.
-If it doesn't go ahead, I'm done. -But you have Anka.
You know how much work it is?
The injections and doctors.
And nothing. Zero results.
You think Ania will give up?
You gave up.
But you know?
When the baby's born
and you see the first smile, hear the babbling sounds,
something magical happens.
You change.
Get it?
You become that kid's Superman.
And then you start to believe that you're a Superman.
The most important thing is to stop having expectations.
Would I go through all this again?
I would, in a heartbeat.
It's worth it.
I could eat some fish.
Come, let's get some fish.
Gosh, the way she looks!
So cute.
I'd go for her myself.
So, to sum up,
Swayze could never win against Bruce Lee. Have you seen Enter the Dragon?
And you, Road House?
He rips out a guy's larynx with his bare hands,
leaving a hole with guts and stuff, man.
That's why he should play laryngologists, not people of combat.
But how strong do you have to be to rip a throat out like that?
Hey, the Planet Single guy.
Look.
Told you they were associates.
He's coming here, right?
I'm sorry you had to wait.
-Hi. -Yes?
Yeah, I can.
Jeez, look at that boor on his phone.
Why--
-What on-- -It's a disaster.
I'm sorry.
Work.
Well then.
Tell me something about yourself.
I have a better idea.
Each of us will admit to something.
Something we'd never tell anyone else.
And we have to promise we'll keep it a secret.
The other one is coming. Watch out.
That's new.
Okay.
I'm in.
But ladies first.
Is that Miguel?
Good evening. How do you like the place?
Phenomenal.
You look familiar. Have we met before?
No, I'd definitely have remembered.
Maria.
Mano!
Come!
I took the liberty of asking the kitchen to prepare a few local specialties.
We'll start with the appetizers.
-Right. You were saying? -This is a few years ago.
I'm 21…
And flamouriana.
An exquisite soup made of fresh tomatoes.
Really?
He did that on purpose.
-Where? Come on! -Sorry.
Oh my God.
Why is she laughing?
You know what? Hold on.
I mean this…
This color doesn't suit you.
I don't believe that.
Wanna cook anything more?
Look what he's up to over there.
It's sabotage.
Something has to-- We can't leave it like this.
Relax. He's just seasoning the food.
Seasoning?
So, you're 21.
-Yes, I'm 21-- -Again, my deepest apologies.
There you go again.
It's time to surrender your senses to Greek gods.
Spécialité de la maison.
Really?
Thank you.
You're 21 years old.
I'm 21 years old.
I'm going to see a new gynecologist for the first time.
The guy calls me in and tells me to get ready.
I take off my underwear and just stand there, naked.
He turns around.
Eyes wide open.
Bewildered. I don't know what's going on.
After a while he says
that the gynecologist's room is at the far end of the corridor,
and he's a dentist.
True story?
A dentist.
Oh my.
Everything okay?
Oh my God.
-Hang on. -Oh my God, he's choking.
-Maybe we should help. -Give it a rest.
Hold on. Maybe I should slap you. Wait.
This is terrible.
Mother of God! Get up. How do I…
More.
Oh my God. Hold on.
Aleks?
I think I'll have soup.
Are you okay?
Jeez. This is me.
Right.
Listen.
This evening has been quite a surprise for me.
Shame it's about to end.
Who said it's about to end?
-Yes! -Yes!
I feel like I'm back in high school.
-Ania! -Jesus!
-What are you doing here? -Well…
We have serious suspicions that Aleks is in cahoots with Miguel.
-What? -Yes.
We saw how Miguel seasoned Aleks' food.
And before that, Miguel started receiving threats and warnings on his phone.
How do you know Miguel gets threats?
-From his phone. Got it when we broke in-- -What?
Stop it.
But…
-We didn't steal from anyone. -Yeah.
So, you've been playing detectives because of some conspiracy theory?
We only broke into his computer.
-I've had enough of this. -Stop it.
Have you seen my husband?
-What? I'm here. -Bogdan!
-Olka! -Bogdan!
Every time you drink, you go crazy.
-Tomek. -Ania…
Okay. I know that I've been screwing up lately but--
To put it mildly.
Marcel was devastated.
Okay. But I'm protecting him, first and foremost, right?
Why don't you simply admit that you're scared of losing him?
That you're doing all you can to keep things intact?
Because things used to be good.
Now everything sucks and it'll only get worse.
Wow.
-Ania… -Thanks.
-Ania, I'm not talking about us, okay? -You think it's easy for me?
To smile and pretend that everything is okay? Well, it's not.
Fair enough.
It's harder than we expected.
But I was hoping we'd get through it together.
Please.
Don't let me down.
-Who? -Wolf.
Night on the couch?
Yeah.
You?
-Beach. -Wow.
You win. Let's go.
What do you want?
I'm sure your husband loves you very much. He just doesn't know how to show it.
He doesn't even notice me.
My first husband would always wear jackets but he'd never hang them back.
He'd throw them wherever.
On the kitchen table, on the bathroom floor…
in our kid's bedroom.
It used to drive me crazy.
In the end, I said enough is enough, and I divorced him.
Now, 30 years and three divorces later, I'm thinking that…
it was very stupid of me.
He was a nice guy.
I regret that I didn't just carry on hanging up those damn jackets myself.
Thank you.
The truth is that…
I acted like a jerk.
A jealous jerk.
Jealous.
A jealous jerk, okay?
I should've trusted Marcel trusting you and…
So, in terms of all the moral damage…
-Well, I'm sorry. -We're sorry.
You can apologize in your own way, okay?
So?
Are we cool?
I really appreciate it.
I know how hard it is to admit to a mistake.
Tomek.
-Wait. -Tomek!
-Wait! You'll get your turn. -Just read it.
-What? -This!
Man…
What happened?
Someone texted you that you have two hours to leave the island,
or they'll reveal your identity to the police.
-How did you get this? -Just did.
-You're the Planet Single Bandit. -I knew it from the start.
-Call Marcel. -No, please. I'm begging you.
Please don't.
It's true.
It was supposed to be another scam, but then…
everything changed when I got to know and fell in love with him.
I really wanted to follow a different path and start a new life,
but things didn't go my way.
I've ruined everything.
Everything.
Marcel deserves the truth.
No.
The truth would kill him.
Let's do it this way.
I'll leave and…
I'll never come back.
Like a total coward.
Tell him whatever you want, but…
not the truth.
What?
What's your problem? You got what you wanted.
Where are you going?
Knock, knock.
Tomek? Welcome.
You know what? You've got some balls.
-Excuse me? -Stop pretending.
We know everything. We read the texts.
Miguel admitted to everything this morning and left.
-I'm sorry to hear that. -You are?
You knew from the beginning
that Marcel wouldn't get to put on the show he envisaged.
You've been deceiving him from the beginning. Why?
Just to get back at me?
You don't lack self-esteem.
You can take that show of yours and shove it right up your ass!
What was that?
The last cry of a dying career.
What do you mean, he's gone?
I think he left. For good.
-I'm sorry. -What did you tell him?
Nothing. We came to apologize but he was already gone.
What you're saying makes no sense!
Maybe he got cold feet about the wedding?
What wedding? He didn't even get to propose because of him!
It's all your fault. Everything was fine until you showed up.
-I shouldn't have invited you at all! -I'm sorry, okay? I really am.
You can blame it all on me. I don't mind.
Maybe it's my fault?
All I talked about was this damn show and he…
He kept saying not to do it, but I was pushing for it.
-I kept pushing. -Marcel, come on. Stop it. And the show…
I don't think you have to worry about it anymore.
What do you mean?
Well, I kind of had a chat with Aleksander.
Oh no.
What did you tell him?
What else did you screw up?
Listen, you can always sleep on our couch in Warsaw.
Jeez, no! Marcel, stop! No. Calm down.
All of it looked so real.
You tried to warn me but I didn't see it.
I thought you were jealous.
And I was.
Sorry for smashing your lip.
-I had it coming. -Well, actually…
Yes.
You did.
If Miguel
wants to destroy everything we've built together,
so be it.
I can do the same.
You spend so much time with someone.
Put all your heart in.
Just to find out that they're a total stranger.
This was our first date.
In Malta.
His shirt got dirty,
so I gave him my scarf.
He tied it around his neck
and said he'd never give it back to me.
-Ola! -What?
How?
This was in Malta?
Yes.
What?
-Maria. -Maria.
Maria what?
Wow. I've finally earned a visit.
I wouldn't have left without saying goodbye.
Well, make it quick. Aleksander and I have plans.
So? Am I supposed to congratulate you?
Actually, I have to thank you.
The stunt with the soup was top-notch. The best icebreaker I've ever seen.
-You know that you don't have to do this. -I have to.
Actually, I do.
I'm not stupid enough to fall for a guy who was supposed to be our mark.
Please don't say that.
You left me.
Your own sister.
We've always been partners
but you chose to ditch me for some shitty fling!
It's not a fling.
For the first time in my life I feel that…
I love.
I'm happy for you.
Our whole lives we've been saying that love is nonsense.
What if we actually need it?
You should give yourself a chance too.
Get out.
-Get out. -Please.
-You've made your choice. Get out. -Maryś!
So it was Maria on the other end of the phone.
That's right. She was his silent partner.
She was sending the texts because together they are…
Planet Bandit!
I love you!
Wait a minute.
What if Marcel wasn't the actual target,
but Aleksander?
Yes! She used Marcel to get to Aleksander.
And I led her right to him. What a slut!
Ania! She's just a sleazebag.
But that means that Aleksander has nothing to do with this.
Damn it!
So why was Miguel trying to poison him during dinner?
What was the spilled soup about? Nothing makes sense.
He didn't want to poison him.
He wanted to ruin his dinner, get it?
He knew that Maria wants to scam Aleksander.
He wanted to protect me because he loves me.
He loves me!
We have to save Aleksander.
Without him, the show will fall apart.
Oh my God! I destroyed our belongings! I burned our ABBA tickets!
How am I going to get new tickets now?
Marcel, we have to find Aleksander.
-Hey, boss. -Where's the lady from room 13?
She checked out.
Aleksander's car took her to Palladium about 15 minutes ago.
-Sleazebag. -The press event.
Boss, Miguel left this for you.
What's up?
Marcel! What's going on?
I have to go.
No, we have to go to the press event to find Aleks.
-Right. So you go there and I'll go there. -Where the hell do you want to go?
Where the heart leads.
Let's go spoil somebody's fun.
I'll park it for you, sir.
I'll be right back.
Mount Juktas. You've got to be there.
And here's Wolf and Ania! The faces of Planet Single Classic.
Wolf, what's it like to pass the baton to the younger generation?
It's like riding a bike without the saddle.
Excruciating at first, but you get used to it.
Always a fan!
No means no.
Let's go!
See you inside!
Let's go!
Come on, let's go!
Got you, hick.
Right, I'll distract Aleksander and you-- Olka!
Hello.
Ania! You came after all.
Well, I thought it'd be nice.
-Maria, this is Ania. -We've met.
A long time ago. Come.
Let's talk about the good old times.
Old friends. You know what it's like, right?
-The time has come, partner. -What time?
Well, you're the bad cop.
I am.
The Eagle Claw!
Hey, it works!
Not the hair.
What are you doing?
Isn't it obvious?
-I'm philandering with a billionaire. -Stop this bullshit. You're a con artist.
Aren't we all?
Some like to pretend they're younger, others, that they have perfect lives.
Yet deep inside, we all know it's fiction, right?
See? Told you it would work.
Well, man, I'm really impressed.
Listen.
Run, Tomek. Run, okay?
No!
Bogdan!
Dude, what have you done?
I did it. To make it clear, I was saving your ass.
You did.
Don't let it be for nothing.
I have to go.
-Go. -Hang on.
Thanks.
Show them.
Who let you shoot at people? What a moron!
So? You want a finder's fee?
How much? Ten percent?
-Back off. -In your dreams.
You have no idea what I went through to get here.
In that case, we'll tell Aleks who you are.
If he learns about me, you can say goodbye to your show and the hotel.
And then, Marcel will be screwed.
We'll take the risk.
Honey.
You have to know how to bluff.
And since you have no hard evidence, who will convince Aleks?
A jealous, unhappy, mousy ex?
Or the chick he just spent the night of his life with?
Yiamas!
She's good.
We're moving to plan B.
Do we have a plan B?
So it's my turn to have a heart attack?
Marcel?
Please, leave.
I don't want you to see this.
You know I can't.
Go away!
I used you.
I don't love you, Marcel.
My sister was right.
I am a liar.
I destroy everything I touch.
I don't want to live knowing that I screwed everything up.
That I've hurt you. I can't!
So live your life proving to me that you're not like that.
Making it up to me!
Fight for us.
Are we not worth it?
It's not that simple.
Who said it's supposed to be simple?
And what? You're simply going to…
forgive me?
You'll forgive me after everything I did to you?
I don't know.
I don't know what comes next.
But if you are the man I think you are…
then I really want to try.
How about mouth-to-mouth?
I'll take care of this.
For almost a decade, Planet Single Classic
has been Europe's number one dating app.
With Planet Single Hookups,
we've entered the global market and took the world by storm.
Well done!
And tonight,
a surprise.
The brand is constantly evolving.
In line with that, you're about to see something completely new.
An international reality show,
Planet Single: Island.
And now, a special guest who will entertain us at today's party.
Straight from Ibiza…
Tomek Wilczyński!
Thanks! It's great to be here with you!
Thank you very much! Hey!
You're just lovely! I'm glad I agreed to this.
Take the microphone from him, but be discreet.
Aleksander is completely right.
We desperately need a new place for people who are seeking sex and titillation.
Listen. I'm not saying that it's a bad idea, it's just…
It's a great idea!
I mean, why do we need love…
if we have endless options to choose from?
We've been fed the myth of true love our whole lives.
But the truth is
that "happily ever after" is bullshit!
-Yay! -That's right!
True that!
The original idea for this show,
Marcel's idea was never going to work.
It was supposed to be about people who meet on the island
and overcome challenges together through the power of love and empathy.
Sorry, I'm falling asleep just talking about it. Get it?
What crap!
Luckily, thanks to Aleks' idea, we'll soon be able to watch couples
who don't face such problems!
Just excitement and sex!
Only what's best without the hard work! And if they get bored…
We all do that anyway.
We don't appreciate what we have.
Instead, we fixate on stuff that we could've had.
And so, it consumes us day by day.
We drift apart.
And we feel increasingly unhappy.
But the truth is that all good things require work.
Including love.
Because true love has to be fought for.
Fascinating, really. Fascinating! But what were you hoping to achieve?
Dude, what happened here is the least of your problems.
Do you know she's a con artist?
In addition, she has hair extensions and a bad attitude!
I have no idea what she's on about.
Maria.
It's over.
No more lies.
What's he talking about?
What's going on?
Maria is a professional con artist. She's using you and only wants your money.
Everyone only wants my money.
Thank you for the concern. But relationships are transactional.
You give, you get.
Fucking awesome!
-Popeye, please remove Mr. Wilczyński. -Come on. Have you lost your mind?
Ania, this isn't Notting Hill.
You can't gatecrash my press conference, make a few impromptu speeches,
and hope that it will change the course of a multi-million dollar transaction.
Besides, Marcel's idea is simply stupid.
I happen to like it.
Can you stay out of this? It's none of your business.
No, I can't.
I'm the CFO of this company
and I'm very interested in the potential of this new show.
Mom, please.
-You're his mom? -You're his mom?
Did I not mention it?
I guess it didn't come up.
Marcel’s idea goes against what the others are doing.
And those who stand out from the crowd win.
So if you don't mind, I'll start working on the new show,
and you play…
with your new toy.
I think we've all had enough of stories about men
who only want to screw and cheat,
so why don't we, for a change, tell a story about love and empathy?
Marcel, my dear.
Tell me everything.
-In detail. -Of course.
Mothers.
They know how to fuck up your fun at any age.
Got any plans?
My yacht is waiting.
As long as we go far away from here.
-Galápagos? -Galápagos? Why there?
-I'm buying some towers there. -Towers?
-A few properties. -Tomek!
Tomek, did you hear that? Tomek!
No, Bodzio. Let it go.
Tomek! Where are you going?
We've got some catching up to do.
Bodzio! There's a group online
that noticed a link between weather control towers and…
You're back.
-We start shooting in a month. -Yeah, I can't wait. Really.
-Good luck. -And to you.
-So? See you in Warsaw? -No, we're going with you.
-With us? -Yup.
-They're going with us? -Yeah, why?
What about the 5G towers?
Like water off a duck's back to me.
That's the spirit.
Let's go.
That's a great title!
It'll be a hit!
You know, I think last night might have been it.
Yeah.
I have a good feeling about it too.
Whatever happens, we're in this together.
Forever.
Subtitle translation by: Maja Konkolewska