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Awesome.
Hey, does Mom know you drive like that?
Whatever, OK. Can you get your stuff? l'm missing 90210.
You know, you're lucky you have all that gear in your mouth,
'cause they're gonna need your teeth to identify your charred remains.
- Shut up! You're such a dick! - Bye, Nicole.
- time apart. That's all. - Where is this coming from?
You can come, all right? lt's not...
Never mind. You don't want me to come, l'm not coming.
- Fine. Then l want you out. Bye! - Am l a partner or am l not?
You don't support me. You don't support me and my band.
l support the band. l love the band.
Just get in the car.
Don't hurry back.
Come on!
You missed a spot right here.
Can l clear these for you, sir?
Will you be wanting any more peanuts?
l think they have another crate in the galley.
Thanks.
Oh, dear. All right, then. l'll just be getting you a towel.
Oh, dear, l'm... Oh, l'm so sorry.
l'm sorry.
l'm fine, thank you.
There's towels in here. So l don't really need...
- Everything all right, sir? - Every... Yeah.
Everything's good. Thanks.
Your attention. please.
There has been a luggage carousel change for flight 640.
It will now be on caroudel four.
Don't.
l'm Oliver.
- l just thought we'd chat ab... - Blah, blah, blah.
- See, it's ruined. - What's ruined?
Our little secret.
Actually, l think the stewardess was kind of onto us, so...
Well, she'll have to be killed.
- l'm Oliver. - You keep saying that.
Wow. You don't make it easy for a guy.
l think l made it pretty easy for ya, Oliver.
So, what's Bon Jovi do?
- Who? - The boyfriend.
Ex-boyfriend.
Yeah, l noticed that.
So, what happened there?
What, are we friends now?
l'd say we're a little bit more than friends.
Bon Jovi get a big record contract or somethin'?
His name's not Bon Jovi.
Oh.
He plays guitar.
Everyone plays guitar.
You play guitar?
No.
Strike two.
Strike two?
What was strike one?
Would you like to sit next to your girlfriend?
Thank you very much. l'd love to.
So, what's your deal, Oliver? You in New York on business?
Me? Oh, uh... Well, thank you for asking.
No, actually l'm here visiting my brother.
He's a lawyer. Well, he's going to be. He's in law school, so...
ls that what you wanna do, too?
l don't know.
l just finished school.
Don't people usually graduate in June?
Yeah.
lt's almost a year ago. You still don't have a job?
What are you, my mom?
l don't know, when you look at me, do you see your mom?
- What sign are you? - What sign am l?
Cancer.
Strike three.
Thanks.
lt's Emily.
l'd have never guessed Emily.
Don't get mugged.
Nice to meet you too, Oliver. l'm Carol. l've heard a lot about you.
l'm sorry, l thought you were...
Yeah.
(# ''Walkin' On the Sun'' by Smash Mouth)
((imitating Elvis Presley)) Thank you very much.
# It ain't no joke I'd like to buy the wworld a toke
# And teach the wworld to sing in perfect harmony
- Where'd it go? - What?
My jacket. lt was right there.
What jacket?
l ain't seen no jacket.
What?
What can l get for 20?
20?
Dollars?
# So don't delay. act now supplies are running out
# Allow. if you're still alive. six to eight years to arrive
# And if you follow there may be a tomorroww
# But if the offer's shun you might as well be walkin' on the sun
# You might as well be walkin' on the sun
You know, kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray.
Really? What's screwing one like?
- You stalking me? - Yes.
Oh, somebody stole my jacket.
What are you doing? You wanna do something?
What, are we friends now?
Ah! Here she is.
- l thought you were using the ladies'. - l was. But, um...
l just came out to get some air.
Hi, l'm Brent, Emily's father.
Hi, Oliver.
- Christine. - My stepmother.
So, you ready for some Guggenheim?
You know what? Can l... Would you mind if l skipped the museum?
- Oh, Em, Christine took off work. - l know. l'm sorry, it's just...
Would you mind if l tell them?
No, not at all. Go ahead.
Oliver is getting some test results back today,
and he was just wondering if l could go with him.
lt's a scary time. lt's OK.
- So... lt won't take long. - Oh, don't you worry about that.
You take as long as you need.
l'm sure everything will turn out fine.
You'll see.
Good luck.
- l'll see ya later? - OK.
Thanks.
You know, stuff like that's not even funny.
You only get one chance to make a first impression.
What do you care what my dad thinks?
What if we hit it off, become a thing or something?
- What was that? - You and l would never become a thing.
Oh! OK, you really think pretty highly of yourself, don't you?
First of all, why would l get mixed up with a guy who l know firsthand
will jump into an airplane bathroom with the first girl that comes a-knockin'?
That was with you!
You don't wanna get mixed up with me because l slept with you?
Second of all, you're not even close to being my type.
Well, l'm not lookin' for a girlfriend anyway, so...
And thirdly, it turns out you might be gay.
l mean, l want a girlfriend.
Whatever. Just first things first, you know?
- What things? - l don't know.
Make a plan and get all my ducks in line.
You mean ducks in a row?
- Yes, l mean ducks in a row. - Well, what ducks are those?
Like the normal kinda ducks. Like, job, career, house, future.
And what? Then the girl of your dreams will just come and find you?
Yep.
l'll find her. We'll find each other.
Don't worry about me and girls, OK? l do all right.
Here.
What's that? Stop. Get outta here.
You're not unattractive.
(# ''Save Tonight'' by Eagle Eye Cherry)
You do realize it's the middle of the afternoon, right?
Mm-hm.
Two more?
You know what? l still got stuff to do today, so...
So do l.
You know what? Make 'em doubles.
They are doubles.
26.
You know what? l got it.
- l know. - You know.
You know what? l don't mind paying,
but l hate the fact that you assume that l'm paying.
That's just... l mean, at least make a move.
Like, make the reach for it or something.
What if you don't get your ducks in a row?
l'll get my ducks in a row. ln a line.
What if it takes 20 years?
lt's not gonna take 20 years. lt's gonna take five years.
Six, maybe. Max.
You don't even have a job.
- You don't even have an inkling of a job. - See, that's not true.
l'm kinda interested in all the stuff going on with the lnternet.
Well, that's good. l hear that's gonna be huge.
- lt will be. - l'm sure.
- Are you being sarcastic? - No!
l think you're gonna be beating away chicks with a stick.
Do you really think that six years from now,
a guy like me, with a job, a house, a car - a nice car - and a future,
you think l'm gonna have a problem findin' somebody to fall in love with me?
Oh, l think you're gonna have a big problem.
You...
What are you doing?
All right. l am writing down my parents' phone number.
- You live with your parents? - No.
Yes. But not in six years, l won't.
What does six years have anything to do with it?
Yeah, well, if you let me finish, it's my whole... it's my whole point.
Six years from now, you call this phone number,
my parents will answer the phone. You ask 'em how to reach me.
They'll give you the number.
Then you call my house, and when my beautiful wife answers the phone,
then you can ask her where to send the 20 bucks you owe me.
20 bucks? l thought you were gonna be some hotshot business guy.
Fine. 50.
- 50 big ones. - 50 it is.
Whoa.
(# ''Mint Car'' by The Cure )
# The sun is out I'm so happy I could scream
# And there's no where else in the world I'd rather be
Any time before Christmas.
- l'm saving my film. - For what?
For your trip? This is your trip. lt's happening right now.
Don't. Be careful. l got it for Christmas, so don't...
Oh, no. You're not shooting me.
Oh. All the places l've traveled.
Nice. Mom's gonna love that one.
Look alive. Look, act really natural in your surrounding.
Look sexy. Let's see Ollie being sexy.
Ooh, l like it.
There you go. That's good.
Yeah!
Make love to the tree. Yeah!
Now give it to me.
- Give me the camera. - ''Please.''
Would you give me the camera?
- Are you done? - You're out of film.
No.
- How did you shoot a whole roll? - You're very shootable.
Did l not just say l'm saving the film?
Hey.
- Did you get the right film? - l don't know.
- 400 speed? - l don't know, l just got film.
- Was there change? - Shut up. Give me that.
l gotta go.
OK.
- So... - Don't.
You'll ruin it.
That was, uh...
That was pretty good.
Pretty good?
All right, awesome.
- Mm-hm. - Mind-blowing.
Out of this world. ls that working for ya?
- Yeah. - Yeah? All right.
- Where are you going? - l gotta work. l'm sorry.
Oh, my God, are you serious? l thought l was terrible.
OK, wait, let me just get a pen. Hold on.
Honey.
OK, go ahead.
Uh-huh. ls that the Valley?
OK. No, am l gonna be late?
OK, OK. l will.
l will. OK, thank you.
OK. Bye.
l got it. l got it!
You... what? You got the part?
No, l got a callback. But still!
lt's one of those low-budget independent films, but who cares?
Sweetie, will you just run my lines with me before l go?
OK, what do you think?
l don't wanna look too desperate, even though l am.
What are you doing?
l'm going.
Honey, you don't have to go, l'm going.
- You can have two whole hours here. - No, Em.
l mean...
l'm going.
l'm sorry.
- Martin, please, listen to me. - Let go, Alexa.
lt can't end this way, Martin, not like this.
You should've thought of that before, Alexa.
Don't turn your back on me, Martin. You owe me more than that.
l don't have anymore to give, Alexa. You've taken it all.
- l'm sorry, just... Look at me, Martin... - OK, thank you.
Sorry, l just lost my place. Sorry.
Emily, Emily, it's... lt's very, very good.
Just try and keep in mind how much you love him.
- Martin? - Yeah.
- OK. - He's the love of her life, OK?
So how would that make her feel if he was leaving her?
- Desperately unhappy? - Exactly.
Just one more thing. Try and keep in mind she's a vampire.
OK, here we go. And action.
You're better off. That's what l think.
Of course she's better off.
Dumps you right before New Year's. lt's awful.
l didn't want to say anything to you while you were still seeing him...
- Here, Dallas. -...but it's always gotta be about him.
Well, l didn't see Peter that way at all. He could be too nice.
Yeah, l guess you're right. But she's still better off.
- Oh, she is much better off. - She's better off.
When it's over, it's over.
- You're coming tomorrow, aren't you, Em? - She's coming.
Hey, how about a blind date? l know someone.
- You can't take a blind date to New Year's. - Why?
Why? Because it's a blind date. You don't roll the dice on New Year's.
Well, you don't go to New Year's alone either.
- Why not? l'm going alone. - Well, that's you.
- And what's that supposed to mean? - l'm just sayin'.
The point is, is that it's New Year's. And you know, date or no date,
you just don't spend New Year's alone.
Don't. She quit.
# All decked out in her designerclothes
# Drivin' in a Beamer with the top down
Hi, is Chris there?
Oh.
# Now stepping stones and licking bones and cast them all aside
# I wonder what she's looking for tonight
Hello?
Hey... He-hello? Hi.
- Yeah?! - Telephone!
Hello?
- Hello? - l got it, Ellen.
Yeah, yeah. l'm here.
l just came across your number all of a sudden
- Sure. - So, really?
- Oliver. - l'm on the phone, Ellen.
You got a pager, Ellen.
- I know, but I can't talk on a pager. - Ellen, get off the phone!
You are such a dick!
- Ellen! - Hello?
Sorry about that. You still there?
Yeah.
- Hello? - Hello, it's me.
- Hi. - Hi.
Ahh!
You...
- He's a little... - He's saying you're crazy.
Yeah, l got that.
Did she honk?
- Bye. - Bye. Bye.
- Hi. - Hi.
- You look different. - So do you.
- But, like, good different. - You, too. l like your hair.
Thank you.
l'm still signing.
Your brother screen all your dates?
This is a date?
Can l get you anything to drink? A tea or a soda?
- l'm good, thanks. - Just gonna grab a beer.
Because l'm not the same girl you met three years ago.
l mean, l'm the same girl, but it's not at all the same situation.
Right. l understand.
Yeah.
l am looking for your crazy pills.
That's not funny.
l had a car, then l sold it. l needed the capital for my business.
That's right. The plan. The ducks.
That's right.
''Diaper-rush-dot-com''?
- Just need a good business plan. - Diapers?
Big talk coming from a diaper salesman.
Oh, OK.
You did. ln your kitchen during your hypoglycemic rant.
l'm not telling you.
Did you dump him? No. He dumped you.
- l'm not gonna talk about it. - OK.
Fine. Then l'm not talkin' at all.
- You're not talking? - You ain't gettin' boo outta me.
Fine, l'm not talking either.
Are you OK?
OK, fine. l'll tell you.
- l met him in class. - Yeah?
- Ah, he's an actor.
Hm. Hi. Could l get a coffee?
- After you. - Oh, sorry. Go ahead.
- Frappuccino, please. - All right.
He left me.
- l got it. - No, l got it.
No. But l appreciate the reach.
The acting classes are really paying off, but l got it.
Shut up, l got it.
- Bunch of amateurs getting drunk. - Yeah. Yeah.
Lame.
Let's go.
Try this.
Just be yourself.
Hey, Emily. l gotta ask you somethin'.
- Hey, do you mind? - Sorry.
You can't get strike one before you step up to the plate.
You came!
- Hello, ladies. - Oh, my God! Look at you.
- Get you a drink? - l'm good, thanks.
l think l'll get one.
Uh-uh. You are not getting off that easy.
He's an old friend.
Uh-oh.
Hello?
Ellen, it's me.
- Thank you. - Eminem's here?
Some guy.
ls he kissing her back?
l'm sorry, l couldn't hear you. lt sounded like you said you sell diapers.
There you are!
Come on.
(# ''Mad About You'' by Hooverphonic)
#...it's driving me insane
Put your hands on my ass. That'll really get him.
# Mad about you
- You all right? - Yeah.
l'm gonna go... l'm gonna go to the ladies' room.
l'll be right back.
Come on in here, y'all!
1 0...
3, 2, 1!
- Clearly, you're not a fan of... - Shh!
- Ooh! - Ooh!
- You OK? - l'm fine.
Yeah. l told you.
You did?
Earlier.
- Ollie. - Yeah?
Hey, l took this.
You framed it.
- Yeah, l liked it. - You framed my picture.
lt's a good picture.
l think that... that it's time that...
l think it's time that l stop...
being somebody's...
girlfriend.
Hold on one second. Just one sec.
Emily?
You OK?
- Hey, baby.
l'm home.
Sorry l'm late. l got hung up at the office.
Don't bother, l already picked it up.
You seen my red shirt?
This.
Yes, and a bonus track. So you see my dilemma.
Oh, jeez, spare me the pickup line. Here.
And you are...
...Emily.
- Here. - No, l couldn't.
- Come on, just take it. - Really, it's yours.
No, just take it. Seriously, l feel bad. Take it.
- Really? - Yeah.
Airport. Yeah.
Exactly like this. All black like Batman.
Yo, you should get one, too, like Batman and Robin.
Come on, hop in.
Dude, take a step back, man. You're startin' to depress me.
Beautiful.
- Gorgeous. - Come on, Hailey.
Oh, my God, are you guys kidding? Get a room.
Oh, l can't help it, he's so hot.
Hi. Emily.
Hi.
- That's all l'm gonna get outta you, isn't it? - Yeah.
- Bye, hon. - Bye, sexy.
- See ya. - Bye.
lt's a game people play at picnics, honey.
Hey.
So make yourself at home.
Emily, let's not get picky.
And l couldn't look less sexy.
You don't need it. Call me.
But...
She said that she couldn't be number three or number four
on someone's list of priorities.
This is... Hi. Hello?
- lt's not. - It'll be fine.
Don't call back here.
Sorry about that, l just...
l'm pro pancakes.
l just can't...
Come on, Ollie, you gotta just let it go.
There it is. That's the one.
- Hi.
Really long, yeah.
Emily. Hi.
- Hey. - Uh, it's...
- Yeah? You're good? - Yeah.
Oh. Great.
Yeah, no, it's good that you both said hi.
Yeah, no, l'm glad you sa...
- Hi. - Hey.
Oh. You're right.
- Bye. - Nice meeting you!
- Let's get outta here. - OK.
All right. Come on. Let it go.
Shut up.
Get off the road, grandma!
Come on.
No.
- (# ''If You Leave Me Now'' by Chicago) - l remember this one time...
# Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-oh, baby, please don't go
# Ooh-ooh-ooh, no, baby, please don't go
# Find
Come on.
Just... just pick something.
Oh, look at the moon.
No.
l thought l did.
l didn't hear anything.
Oh, my God!
Oh!
Oh, my God. Are you OK? Ollie, are you all right?
l looked.
- Ooh, looking good. - Shut up.
OK, the shutter's gonna stay open for 40 seconds.
- Are you ready? - Ready.
# I never knew what love was for
# What a feeling
# What a feeling in my soul
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# Brighter than sunshine
# And it's brighter than sunshine
# I never saw it happening
# I'd given up and given in
# I just couldn't take the hurt again
# What a feeling
# But suddenly it seemed so right
# Me and you, what a feeling
Folks, can l talk to you out here for a second?
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
Folks.
# And it's brighter than sunshine
Folks, this is a national park.
l gotta go.
OK.
lt sounds exciting.
- l'll grab this. - l got it, l got it.
You got my number.
Yes, l do.
Oh, yeah, yeah. Good.
some, like, feelings to sort through.
- About... - Bridget?
Yeah.
l didn't forget. lt's ''Bridget.''
- l... lt's... - lt's OK.
- ls it? - Yeah.
l met someone.
You met someone?
A different guy?
Thank you.
So...
Don't.
You'll ruin it.
Get outta here, l'm sick of you.
Pitch and go. Pitch and go, keep up the pace.
lt's not a big deal. l'm sorry.
lt actually is quite a big deal. But don't go too fast.
Jeet-o, l need you to shut up. All right?
...the baby...
The...
Client.
The client inputs the child's data
There it is. Bam. Just on your doorstep.
No hassle, no fuss.
Freddy.
Gabe the babe.
That's 254,000 babies a day.
Yes.
lt's mine.
Yep. Can you hold on one second? lt's bad reception right here.
Found it.
Looks good.
Blue.
That's perfect.
Today's her birthday.
Talk to me.
Doesn't matter.
All right.
There's...
There's this kid, OK?
And the kid looks really sad
And the lady says,
And little Johnny says,
Thank you.
# It's hearing your name, hearing your name
# Since I've lost what I had to gain
# No one to blame, no one to blame
So, that's...
l can't.
No.
OK.
- Hi. - Hi.
- l'm Jeeter. - l'm Natalie.
- Nice to meet you, Natalie. - Good to meet you, too.
- You did, actually. - Yeah?
- Yeah. - You like that?
lt's... lt's interesting.
There's a dial tone.
No. They said Friday afternoon. lt's still Friday afternoon.
- Hello? Diaper...
Hello? There. Hello?
Yeah.
Right.
OK, so...
Thank you.
Oh, yes!
Yes!
That is one special lady.
l'm gonna miss her.
- Just need the keys. - Oh! Yeah.
Hey, can l hang on to the key chain?
- They're, like, 25 bucks. - You serious?
- Thanks. - Yeah.
You need a ride?
Just gonna clear some stuff outta my office.
Yeah, definitely.
# Take my photo off the wall
# If it just won't sing for you
# 'Cause all that's left has gone away
# Oh, look what you've done
# Oh, well, it's seems like such fun
# Until you lose what you had won
# Give me back my point of view
# 'Cause I just can't think for you
# Well, you choose
# Oh, look what you've done
# Oh, well, it seems like such fun
# Until you lose what you had won
# Oh, look what you've done
# 'Cause all that's left has gone away
# Oh, look what you've done
# Oh, well, it seems like such fun until you...
Hi. Back again?
Yep.
# Oh, look what you've done
Chris.
Not so far. Just come back. There you go.
# l heard your suitcase say goodbye
l...
# As my broken heart lies bleeding
# l'll be there for you
# Steal the sun from the sky for you
# l'll be there for you
You suck!
l don't.
Emily...
l'm flat broke.
You're married.
l'm engaged.
No. l think l need the air.
You sound really good.
# 2am and I'm still awake writing this song
# If I get it all down on paper it's no longer inside of me
Ugh! That skirt.
Not the boots.
Kind of.
- You ready? - l gotta go.
l can't let him shop alone.
Talk. Tell me. Do l look fat?
Seriously. The pinstripes, they make me look fat?
- Yeah. - Shirts, huh?
That's a nice shirt. Look at this one.
Shirts.
- Here. - Socks. Yeah.
Thought you quit smoking.
l did.
You better find it.
ls that my tie?
or if it's been disconnected,
or if l can make an emergency breakthrough.
Ben and l broke up.
Honey.
lt's gonna be fine.
Do you remember me?
You just need to talk to him. Just set a time to meet.
Emily...
he's getting married.
OK, you ready? Here it is.
l forgot the number. Find the number.
- Hold on, l'm looking, l'm looking. - She's looking, she's looking.
Big day!
Are you ready, gentlemen?
Ready? Yeah.
- All right. - Let's get started.
Hello?
Honey, are you OK? Shall l call a doctor?
l'll get somebody to help you. Go get somebody to help her.
- Call 9-1 -1. - Just get her some ice...
Are you OK?
- l got it. l got her. - l'm sure there's a doctor...
- l got her. lt's fine. - OK.
- You OK? - Yeah.
l had your number and l just... l called lnformation and got your address.
- l got this. - All right.
lt's good, thanks. ls your head OK?
Yes.
You should go. l'm gonna go.
OK.
Emily.
No.
lt's too late. l'm too...
You're not too late.
l'm not getting married, my sister is.
You're such a dick!
Let's go.
Don't.
You'll ruin it.
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# Brighter than sunshine
# And it's brighter than sunshine
# I never saw it happening
# I'd given up and given in
# I just couldn't take the hurt again
# What a feeling
# But suddenly it seemed so right
# What a feeling in my soul
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# Brighter than sunshine
# And it's brighter than the sun
# It's brighter than the sun
# It's brighter than the sun, sunshine
# Give me your hand and you will see
# Your heart is keeping time with me
# Oh, what a feeling in my soul
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# It's brighter than sunshine
# Got a feeling in my soul
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# Brighter than sunshine
# I got a feeling in my soul
# Love burns brighter than sunshine
# It's brighter than sunshine
# And it's brighter than sunshine
# Maybe it's just me
# But you seem finally happy
# I don't think I've seen your face just glow like a neon sign
# And maybe we should be
# 'Cause even all the nights alone at least I'll make it another day
# But I can live without you if it makes you smile
# Oh-oh-oh
# After all that went down
# But I can live without you if it makes you smile
# And I can't wait to see you rise
# And I can't wait for you to shine
# But I can wait for you if all you need is time
# But I can live without you if it makes you smile
# And I can't wait to see you rise
# I can't wait to see you shine
# But I can wait for you if all you need is time...
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