1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

2
00:01:07,495 --> 00:01:08,989
Hello, folks at home.

3
00:01:10,581 --> 00:01:12,538
I'm 100 yards from the top of Mt. Everest.

4
00:01:12,625 --> 00:01:16,290
Yet there's a part of me
that can't wait to end this silly vacation...

5
00:01:16,378 --> 00:01:19,712
...and get back to work,
where the real challenges await.

6
00:01:20,883 --> 00:01:23,421
Shouldn't you take your age
into consideration, sir?

7
00:01:23,511 --> 00:01:25,550
After all, you're 82 years old.

8
00:01:25,805 --> 00:01:27,215
Am I 82?

9
00:01:27,389 --> 00:01:31,339
These numbers mean nothing to me.
My journey through life has just begun.

10
00:01:31,435 --> 00:01:32,894
Sir! Sir!

11
00:01:33,229 --> 00:01:36,146
-Oota tells me the storm's getting worse.
-Very, very bad.

12
00:01:36,232 --> 00:01:39,351
We must abandon our ascent and
go down the mountain immediately.

13
00:01:39,443 --> 00:01:42,480
We're so very close to the top,
Mr. Puffy Jacket Man.

14
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I'm heading down now, sir.
I advise you to do the same.

15
00:01:46,617 --> 00:01:48,111
All right, so be it.

16
00:01:48,202 --> 00:01:52,282
See you at the staff meeting on Monday.
And I'll bring the Krispy Kremes!

17
00:02:11,016 --> 00:02:14,599
There, once again, the sad footage
we've been watching all day.

18
00:02:14,728 --> 00:02:19,141
A beloved visionary who turned a single
radio station into a global media empire...

19
00:02:19,233 --> 00:02:22,732
...Preston Blake, dead at 82. More after this.

20
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You're watching
the Blake Broadcasting Network.

21
00:02:29,410 --> 00:02:32,115
The stock of Blake Media,
the parent company of this network...

22
00:02:32,204 --> 00:02:34,778
...plunged this morning
on the news of Blake's death...

23
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...but bounced back after a statement by
Blake's long-time number 2, Chuck Cedar.

24
00:02:39,086 --> 00:02:41,375
All the king's horses
and all the king's men...

25
00:02:41,464 --> 00:02:44,879
...couldn't save Preston Blake
from becoming a human Popsicle.

26
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And sources indicate that Blake, who was
single and had no children, left no will.

27
00:02:50,598 --> 00:02:54,049
So who inherits Blake's 49 percent stake
in the company's stock...

28
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...valued at $40 billion?

29
00:02:56,604 --> 00:03:00,933
We'll discuss that with people close
to Blake, including his long-time barber...

30
00:03:01,025 --> 00:03:04,939
...on tomorrow's Inside Access.
Until then, I'm Mac McGrath.

31
00:03:07,031 --> 00:03:08,905
-Are we clear?
-Clear!

32
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,525
Babe? Where's Babe?

33
00:03:11,869 --> 00:03:14,538
-I'll come over and choke you to death.
-Babe!

34
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I got to go.

35
00:03:15,581 --> 00:03:18,072
Freaking barber!
That's the best you could get me?

36
00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:20,836
People tell everything to their barbers.

37
00:03:21,003 --> 00:03:24,372
He's been his closest confidant
for more than 20 years.

38
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:28,379
I'm not putting this guy on the air.
Get me something better and get it quick.

39
00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:29,928
Or it's your ass.

40
00:03:34,391 --> 00:03:36,183
Did we find this heir yet?

41
00:03:36,268 --> 00:03:39,305
We should be getting that information
via fax any minute now.

42
00:03:39,396 --> 00:03:41,638
I have lawyers
looking through birth records...

43
00:03:41,732 --> 00:03:44,519
...in all 50 states, Puerto Rico and Guam.

44
00:03:44,610 --> 00:03:49,106
In fact, we have a little pool going.
Guam's paying off at 1000-1.

45
00:03:49,782 --> 00:03:51,406
Is this a joke to you?

46
00:03:52,368 --> 00:03:55,867
Some genetic lottery winner
now controls the fate of this company.

47
00:03:55,955 --> 00:03:58,528
No, I agree. It's troubling.

48
00:03:58,624 --> 00:04:01,329
Troubling? Your beard is troubling.

49
00:04:01,794 --> 00:04:06,005
Your pipe is troubling.
Your yellow teeth are really troubling.

50
00:04:06,215 --> 00:04:09,880
But if I lose control of this company,
it'll be catastrophic.

51
00:04:15,766 --> 00:04:18,340
Does anyone know a Dr. Mendlesohn?

52
00:04:19,311 --> 00:04:21,885
Congratulations, you have a spastic colon.

53
00:04:22,898 --> 00:04:25,105
That would explain a lot.

54
00:04:40,082 --> 00:04:41,660
"Longfellow Deeds."

55
00:04:48,048 --> 00:04:50,670
Chuck, I think we're there.

56
00:04:52,595 --> 00:04:54,303
My God, it's all green.

57
00:05:00,060 --> 00:05:03,844
Look at that thing.
Fighter pilot on your left.

58
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:06,894
Got that sucker!

59
00:05:21,916 --> 00:05:23,114
You guys lost?

60
00:05:23,209 --> 00:05:25,996
We're looking for somebody:
Longfellow Deeds.

61
00:05:26,295 --> 00:05:28,584
Is that Deeds' first name?

62
00:05:28,672 --> 00:05:31,342
If the Deeds you're referring to
is Longfellow Deeds...

63
00:05:31,425 --> 00:05:33,797
...then yes, that is Deeds' first name.

64
00:05:33,886 --> 00:05:36,803
I don't know Deeds' first name.
Maybe it's Greg.

65
00:05:37,139 --> 00:05:39,262
-Maybe it's Longfellow.
-Maybe.

66
00:05:39,350 --> 00:05:43,015
But I don't know. I know another guy
named Greg. You want me to call him?

67
00:05:43,103 --> 00:05:46,270
No! Thank you.
Please, just tell us where Deeds lives.

68
00:05:46,398 --> 00:05:50,313
All right, don't get all hyperactive.
I'll take you straight to him.

69
00:05:56,575 --> 00:05:58,235
Step right in, fellows.

70
00:06:01,539 --> 00:06:04,539
-He lives at a pizzeria?
-You can't live in a pizzeria.

71
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:06,748
He lives upstairs. He owns it.

72
00:06:06,836 --> 00:06:09,124
Excuse me. Is Mr. Deeds around?

73
00:06:09,213 --> 00:06:13,839
No, I'm sorry, he's out making deliveries.
The regular delivery guy called in sick.

74
00:06:14,009 --> 00:06:18,921
-But you don't look too sick, Murph.
-I forgot I was faking sick today.

75
00:06:19,932 --> 00:06:24,558
-You two tricked me into coming here.
-Put on an apron and give me a hand.

76
00:06:24,979 --> 00:06:28,098
You guys played me like a fiddle. Touche!

77
00:06:29,150 --> 00:06:31,023
Is Mrs. Deeds around?

78
00:06:31,110 --> 00:06:34,313
Mrs. Deeds?
I don't think that poor boy ever had a date.

79
00:06:34,530 --> 00:06:38,444
-Do you know when he'll be back?
-Before lunch is out. Today's Card Day.

80
00:06:38,534 --> 00:06:40,610
-Card Day?
-Deeds writes greeting cards.

81
00:06:40,703 --> 00:06:43,869
Every Monday, he tries out a few
and then he chooses one...

82
00:06:43,956 --> 00:06:46,447
...and sends it
to one of the big card companies.

83
00:06:46,542 --> 00:06:48,867
Now, he hasn't sold any yet, but...

84
00:06:49,170 --> 00:06:50,368
...he will.

85
00:06:51,547 --> 00:06:53,705
You guys need anything else here?

86
00:06:53,841 --> 00:06:55,300
"To my sweetheart

87
00:06:56,343 --> 00:06:59,013
"I love you completely, with all my soul

88
00:06:59,221 --> 00:07:02,258
"Without you I'm nothing, a butterless roll"

89
00:07:03,726 --> 00:07:05,006
That's good.

90
00:07:05,102 --> 00:07:06,680
Like that, gentlemen?

91
00:07:07,688 --> 00:07:10,523
Hallmark said it showed potential,
which is pretty cool.

92
00:07:10,608 --> 00:07:12,896
-Longfellow Deeds?
-Just call me Deeds, pal.

93
00:07:12,985 --> 00:07:15,061
Easy with that Longfellow stuff.

94
00:07:15,321 --> 00:07:16,779
Chuck Cedar, CEO.

95
00:07:16,864 --> 00:07:19,699
Cecil Anderson,
General Counsel of Blake Media.

96
00:07:19,783 --> 00:07:22,701
Handshakes are for strangers.
We hug around here, buddy.

97
00:07:22,786 --> 00:07:24,909
What's up? Welcome to town.

98
00:07:26,081 --> 00:07:28,039
Come on, don't be shy.

99
00:07:28,792 --> 00:07:32,244
I like that beard. Abe Lincoln-style.
Have a seat, boys.

100
00:07:32,421 --> 00:07:33,666
-Murph!
-Deeds?

101
00:07:33,756 --> 00:07:36,673
-I thought you were sick today.
-That was a lie, pal.

102
00:07:36,759 --> 00:07:38,170
You fooled me.

103
00:07:38,260 --> 00:07:39,375
-I did?
-Yeah.

104
00:07:39,470 --> 00:07:41,427
-Mr. Deeds?
-Just Deeds.

105
00:07:41,847 --> 00:07:45,596
You sounded so sick on the phone.
You're good. Do that sick voice again.

106
00:07:45,684 --> 00:07:49,634
Deeds, I can't come to work today.
I think I got strep throat.

107
00:07:53,108 --> 00:07:56,524
That's unbelievable.
You could be a radio actor or something.

108
00:07:56,612 --> 00:07:58,901
-Thanks, buddy.
-Sure.

109
00:07:59,114 --> 00:08:02,566
Hey, Deeds. Read a card already.
I got to get back on duty.

110
00:08:03,702 --> 00:08:06,193
I'd better get up there.
Good meeting you, gentlemen.

111
00:08:06,288 --> 00:08:09,373
Mr. Deeds, does the name Preston Blake
mean anything to you?

112
00:08:09,458 --> 00:08:11,451
Mom's maiden name was Blake.

113
00:08:11,794 --> 00:08:16,290
Only one this week, but I got a feeling
it'll end my losing streak with Hallmark.

114
00:08:18,217 --> 00:08:20,459
Preston Blake was your mother's uncle.

115
00:08:20,553 --> 00:08:23,554
You're kidding me, I got an uncle?
Awesome. How's he doing?

116
00:08:23,639 --> 00:08:24,837
He's dead.

117
00:08:25,307 --> 00:08:27,596
Oh, no. If there's anything I can do...

118
00:08:27,685 --> 00:08:29,393
Deeds! Deeds!

119
00:08:30,062 --> 00:08:31,971
I'll be right with you guys.

120
00:08:33,232 --> 00:08:35,853
When Mr. Blake died,
he left an enormous fortune.

121
00:08:35,943 --> 00:08:38,648
$40 billion. He left it all...

122
00:08:39,238 --> 00:08:40,649
...to you, Deeds.

123
00:08:42,992 --> 00:08:44,534
Wait a minute.

124
00:08:45,494 --> 00:08:49,326
What are you talking about, you got
to get back on duty? You're not a cop.

125
00:08:49,415 --> 00:08:52,036
You're right.
I got this down at the costume shop.

126
00:08:52,126 --> 00:08:54,083
But it can't hurt to pretend.

127
00:08:55,045 --> 00:08:56,705
What a wisenheimer!

128
00:08:56,839 --> 00:08:58,831
Okay, everybody, it's show time.

129
00:09:00,676 --> 00:09:02,918
I call this "50th Anniversary Card."

130
00:09:03,512 --> 00:09:05,552
Which is quite a feat nowadays.

131
00:09:06,056 --> 00:09:09,805
"Fifty years have passed by
with laughter and tears

132
00:09:10,519 --> 00:09:12,726
"Do you remember when we went to the zoo

133
00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:15,185
"and that time we drank all the beers?"

134
00:09:15,941 --> 00:09:16,937
Beers!

135
00:09:18,527 --> 00:09:21,979
"I promise to love you for 50 years more

136
00:09:22,490 --> 00:09:25,823
"Even when your bosoms
sag down to the floor"

137
00:09:27,453 --> 00:09:30,122
That was awesome! How's he do it?

138
00:09:33,542 --> 00:09:36,828
It looks like you won't have
to deliver pizza anymore, Deeds.

139
00:09:36,921 --> 00:09:38,581
You're a very rich man.

140
00:09:38,839 --> 00:09:41,461
What's that got to do with delivering pizzas?

141
00:09:41,550 --> 00:09:43,958
Ladies! The top one is yours.

142
00:09:44,053 --> 00:09:46,045
-Thank you, Deeds.
-Of course.

143
00:09:46,138 --> 00:09:48,131
-Yummy!
-So, Deeds, what's new?

144
00:09:48,766 --> 00:09:51,387
I found out I have an uncle, but he died.

145
00:09:51,727 --> 00:09:53,008
That's too bad.

146
00:09:53,270 --> 00:09:56,722
-He gave me $40 billion, though.
-Well, that's nice.

147
00:09:56,899 --> 00:09:57,812
Oh, yeah!

148
00:09:57,900 --> 00:10:01,233
Don't you go and spend it all
on some fancy record player.

149
00:10:01,487 --> 00:10:02,566
I won't.

150
00:10:02,655 --> 00:10:04,232
Who are your friends, Deeds?

151
00:10:04,323 --> 00:10:08,736
I'm sorry.
Chuck, Cecil, this is Jane, Kitty and Sue.

152
00:10:09,203 --> 00:10:13,117
-Pleasure to meet you, Cecil.
-Pleasure's all mine, Kitty.

153
00:10:13,541 --> 00:10:16,114
Or should I just say, "Meow"?

154
00:10:18,254 --> 00:10:20,293
Keep it in your pants, Anderson.

155
00:10:21,590 --> 00:10:26,133
-Now, why am I inheriting this money?
-You're Mr. Blake's closest living relative.

156
00:10:26,428 --> 00:10:29,180
-Really? He had nobody else?
-Nope, that's it.

157
00:10:29,265 --> 00:10:31,304
Gosh, I never even met the guy.

158
00:10:34,186 --> 00:10:36,345
Would you hold this for a second?

159
00:10:37,481 --> 00:10:39,688
Mr. Wetherley. How you doing, pal?

160
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:42,937
Very well, Deeds.
Just going to the pharmacy.

161
00:10:43,028 --> 00:10:45,698
Well, let me get you there a little quicker.

162
00:10:48,576 --> 00:10:50,699
-How's your wife?
-She's fine.

163
00:10:50,786 --> 00:10:53,242
-Terrific. Say hi for me.
-I will.

164
00:10:53,330 --> 00:10:54,825
Okay. Here you go.

165
00:10:56,041 --> 00:10:58,793
-Thanks for the lift, Deeds.
-You got it.

166
00:11:01,714 --> 00:11:05,628
We need you to come back to New York
with us. Just for a few days.

167
00:11:05,718 --> 00:11:08,125
We're drawing up some papers
you'll need to sign.

168
00:11:08,220 --> 00:11:09,714
What kind of papers?

169
00:11:09,805 --> 00:11:14,301
Technically, you've inherited
300 million shares of Blake Media, Inc.

170
00:11:14,393 --> 00:11:17,809
Chuck and l, along with
some of the partners, will buy that stock...

171
00:11:17,897 --> 00:11:21,147
...for $40 billion,
which we've had to borrow from various...

172
00:11:21,233 --> 00:11:23,392
Who cares about
the financial mumbo jumbo?

173
00:11:23,486 --> 00:11:26,321
We need a little time
to dot the t's and cross the i's.

174
00:11:26,405 --> 00:11:29,739
And while we're doing that,
we need you to stay away from the press.

175
00:11:29,825 --> 00:11:33,111
The media frenzy will die down
in a couple weeks but until then...

176
00:11:33,204 --> 00:11:37,284
You don't want reporters crawling
all over this lovely little town, do you?

177
00:11:37,374 --> 00:11:38,370
Oh, no!

178
00:11:41,420 --> 00:11:43,662
-Crazy Eyes!
-What?

179
00:11:46,675 --> 00:11:50,210
How you doing, pal?
I got your pizza, just the way you like it.

180
00:11:50,304 --> 00:11:51,300
Oh, yes!

181
00:11:52,473 --> 00:11:55,676
French fries and Oreos.
You know me all too well, Deeds.

182
00:11:55,893 --> 00:11:57,138
What are you in for?

183
00:11:57,228 --> 00:11:59,932
I'm doing a one-nighter
for biting Ed the mailman.

184
00:12:00,022 --> 00:12:03,521
The guy was trying to cast a spell on me,
like a wizard.

185
00:12:04,652 --> 00:12:08,484
-Are you sure about that?
-I don't know. Maybe he was just waving.

186
00:12:10,032 --> 00:12:13,567
-Who are your friends?
-This is Chuck and Cecil from New York.

187
00:12:15,037 --> 00:12:16,496
I don't like them.

188
00:12:17,289 --> 00:12:18,997
Okay. Nice seeing you.

189
00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:23,624
I've never been to New York before.
I suppose I could check out the sights.

190
00:12:23,712 --> 00:12:26,001
-Give me an hour to pack, okay?
-You got it.

191
00:12:26,090 --> 00:12:30,004
I'll be the first guy to leave here since
Jimmy McNally went to Disney World.

192
00:12:32,555 --> 00:12:34,298
See you later, everybody!

193
00:12:37,351 --> 00:12:41,100
Tomorrow is "Kids Eat For Free" Day.
Don't forget to clean the highchairs.

194
00:12:41,188 --> 00:12:43,560
Don't worry, I'll take care of everything.

195
00:12:43,649 --> 00:12:45,807
-Go, have a good time!
-I'll miss you.

196
00:12:45,901 --> 00:12:48,108
'Bye, Jan. Smell you later, Murph.

197
00:12:49,864 --> 00:12:51,488
-Give us a card!
-Yeah!

198
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,908
"On my way to the big city
for a business trip

199
00:12:58,414 --> 00:13:02,708
"Never, ever left Mandrake Falls before
Ain't that a pip?

200
00:13:05,463 --> 00:13:09,211
"But while I'm gone
I know I'll miss you all a lot"

201
00:13:09,675 --> 00:13:13,589
"So bring your rich butt back here
and buy us all a shot"

202
00:13:15,431 --> 00:13:16,925
You got it, pal!

203
00:13:21,437 --> 00:13:22,848
Take it easy.

204
00:13:31,447 --> 00:13:35,445
The biggest story of the year
and we've got nothing?

205
00:13:36,035 --> 00:13:39,867
Do you want to be tabloid journalists?
Because I don't think so.

206
00:13:39,955 --> 00:13:42,790
You've got to be ruthless.
When I started out...

207
00:13:42,875 --> 00:13:45,746
...I slept in Tom and Roseanne's dumpster
for two days...

208
00:13:45,836 --> 00:13:49,039
-...disguised as a giant carton of ice cream.
-I got it!

209
00:13:49,381 --> 00:13:51,754
My source at Blake says
the company helicopter...

210
00:13:51,842 --> 00:13:55,377
...took off from there this afternoon
with two male passengers aboard...

211
00:13:55,471 --> 00:13:57,428
-...headed for Mandrake Falls.
-Where?

212
00:13:57,515 --> 00:13:59,803
Some little hick-ass town in New Hampshire.

213
00:13:59,892 --> 00:14:03,724
But now they're on their way back
with three male passengers.

214
00:14:04,438 --> 00:14:06,431
-That's one more!
-Duh!

215
00:14:07,316 --> 00:14:10,103
That third guy's our heir. Nice work, Marty.

216
00:14:10,194 --> 00:14:12,767
They were supposed to arrive
at Blake Media at 5:00.

217
00:14:12,863 --> 00:14:15,568
But they made an unscheduled stop
in Connecticut.

218
00:14:15,658 --> 00:14:18,030
I'm so happy I got the Big Bacon Classic.

219
00:14:18,119 --> 00:14:20,325
Thanks for stopping. This is unbelievable.

220
00:14:20,412 --> 00:14:23,616
-Happy to do it.
-How's that Frosty treating you, Cecil?

221
00:14:24,125 --> 00:14:27,375
You got some on your beard.
I'm just kidding.

222
00:14:27,461 --> 00:14:29,169
I got him big time, man.

223
00:14:30,047 --> 00:14:32,503
I'm going on the air in two hours' time.

224
00:14:32,591 --> 00:14:36,375
And I want that guy's life story by then.
I'm talking to you, Jim.

225
00:14:36,846 --> 00:14:39,383
And I'm also talking to you, Babe. Babe?

226
00:14:40,307 --> 00:14:41,932
Where the hell's Babe?

227
00:14:42,017 --> 00:14:44,769
You missed another staff meeting.
Mac's pissed.

228
00:14:44,854 --> 00:14:48,223
He won't be pissed
when I crack this Blake story.

229
00:14:48,315 --> 00:14:51,519
-What do you got?
-Nothing. Do you have anything?

230
00:14:51,777 --> 00:14:53,734
I'll have a lot more in a few hours.

231
00:14:53,821 --> 00:14:55,232
You got to be a pal.

232
00:14:55,322 --> 00:14:58,905
I need this story.
I'm flat broke and Mac is going to fire me.

233
00:14:58,993 --> 00:15:01,994
How're you flat broke?
You make more money than anyone here.

234
00:15:02,079 --> 00:15:04,155
-What did you blow it on?
-Shoes.

235
00:15:04,248 --> 00:15:06,821
I'll tell you everything I know
over lunch tomorrow...

236
00:15:06,917 --> 00:15:09,040
...as long as your club promoter boyfriend...

237
00:15:09,128 --> 00:15:11,833
...doesn't try to run me over
with his motorcycle again.

238
00:15:11,922 --> 00:15:15,754
You're safe there.
Ken and I are kind of taking a break.

239
00:15:15,843 --> 00:15:17,586
Really? So he moved out?

240
00:15:18,929 --> 00:15:22,096
Babe, what are you staying here for?
I have a spare bedroom.

241
00:15:22,183 --> 00:15:24,341
We tried that once, remember?

242
00:15:24,435 --> 00:15:28,598
I woke up and you were standing
over my bed, breathing heavily.

243
00:15:28,689 --> 00:15:31,975
I was having an asthma attack.
I couldn't find my puffer.

244
00:15:34,778 --> 00:15:39,191
Easy, fellows.
The Biggie Fries are making a comeback.

245
00:15:39,825 --> 00:15:43,953
You guys football fans? The Pats
could take the conference this year.

246
00:15:44,038 --> 00:15:47,039
The Dolphins are overrated
and the Jets are choke artists.

247
00:15:47,124 --> 00:15:48,784
I wouldn't say that, Mr. Deeds.

248
00:15:48,876 --> 00:15:52,245
-Just Deeds. Why is that, though?
-You own the Jets, Deeds.

249
00:15:52,338 --> 00:15:53,666
I do?

250
00:15:55,883 --> 00:15:57,046
That sucks.

251
00:15:58,135 --> 00:16:02,464
I hope they don't play the Pats
in the playoffs or I'll have to kill myself.

252
00:16:04,266 --> 00:16:06,638
I'm still very worried about this.

253
00:16:07,394 --> 00:16:10,977
What do you got in that pipe, hashish?
You're paranoid.

254
00:16:11,232 --> 00:16:14,435
-This guy's perfect for us.
-What if he won't sell us his shares?

255
00:16:14,527 --> 00:16:16,852
If I got Blake to trust me with his company...

256
00:16:16,946 --> 00:16:17,822
...I can get this moron to do the same.
Look at him.

257
00:16:17,822 --> 00:16:19,779
...I can get this moron to do the same.
Look at him.

258
00:16:45,558 --> 00:16:47,135
That's right, Anderson.

259
00:17:01,448 --> 00:17:02,991
Enough!

260
00:17:04,451 --> 00:17:05,697
Party pooper.

261
00:17:10,249 --> 00:17:11,660
Holy cow!

262
00:17:12,126 --> 00:17:13,750
What's up, New York?

263
00:17:14,378 --> 00:17:18,376
It's an honour to come
to the greatest city in the world!

264
00:17:25,764 --> 00:17:30,723
Congratulations, Deeds, you're now
the most eligible bachelor in New York.

265
00:17:30,978 --> 00:17:33,765
I don't want to meet a girl
just because I'm wicked rich.

266
00:17:33,856 --> 00:17:36,525
That's nice, but let's see
how you stick to your guns...

267
00:17:36,609 --> 00:17:40,191
...once you've paid a visit to one
of our many fine gentlemen's clubs.

268
00:17:40,279 --> 00:17:41,192
What?

269
00:17:41,614 --> 00:17:43,405
My father saved my mother.

270
00:17:43,490 --> 00:17:46,112
She was figure skating
and fell through the ice.

271
00:17:46,202 --> 00:17:49,986
I always thought I'd meet
a girl the same way. Bullspit like that.

272
00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:53,746
Then I'll just keep a lookout
for ladies in distress, as it were.

273
00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:56,159
-That'd be nice.
-Hey, Mandrake Falls!

274
00:17:57,421 --> 00:17:59,129
Security, stop that guy!

275
00:17:59,965 --> 00:18:01,045
Stop! Come back!

276
00:18:01,133 --> 00:18:04,467
He'll get $100,000 for the picture.
It'll be on the news in an hour.

277
00:18:04,553 --> 00:18:07,471
He deserves it with those
James Bond moves he just pulled.

278
00:18:07,556 --> 00:18:11,720
No, he deserves to get his throat cut,
the filthy spy. Come on, let's go.

279
00:18:18,943 --> 00:18:20,651
So this is where my uncle lived?

280
00:18:20,736 --> 00:18:24,319
Yes, sir. For the last 35 years
of his astonishing life.

281
00:18:24,698 --> 00:18:28,317
-You kind of snuck up on me there.
-I am very, very sneaky, sir.

282
00:18:28,536 --> 00:18:30,991
I see that. My name is Deeds.

283
00:18:31,121 --> 00:18:33,529
I am Emilio, sir. I am your servant.

284
00:18:33,874 --> 00:18:38,417
Servant? I don't want a servant,
but if you want to be my friend, I'll take that.

285
00:18:39,046 --> 00:18:40,161
Friends.

286
00:18:40,714 --> 00:18:42,790
Yes, good friends.

287
00:18:43,801 --> 00:18:48,344
Would you like to go to your apartment?
I'm sure it's been an exhausting day.

288
00:18:48,472 --> 00:18:50,928
-That okay with you, Chuck?
-You'll be safe there.

289
00:18:51,016 --> 00:18:54,266
It'll take us a couple days
to draw up the papers for you to sign.

290
00:18:54,353 --> 00:18:56,393
-Go make yourself at home.
-Terrific.

291
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:58,639
-Later.
-I will be with you shortly, sir.

292
00:18:58,732 --> 00:19:01,852
You got it. Nice to meet you. I'm Deeds.

293
00:19:02,736 --> 00:19:05,441
-I'm Reuben, sir.
-This is a wicked nice elevator.

294
00:19:05,531 --> 00:19:08,697
Keep an eye on him, Emilio.
Or it's your ass.

295
00:19:08,826 --> 00:19:10,617
It's nice to see you too, sir.

296
00:19:10,703 --> 00:19:13,276
So how's the elevator business
treating you, Reuben?

297
00:19:13,372 --> 00:19:15,281
It has its ups and downs.

298
00:19:15,708 --> 00:19:17,831
All right! All right!

299
00:19:18,752 --> 00:19:20,033
That was good.

300
00:19:21,130 --> 00:19:23,455
Jeesum crow,
how'd you get down here so fast?

301
00:19:23,549 --> 00:19:26,301
Sneaky-sneaky, sir. Right this way.

302
00:19:30,097 --> 00:19:31,093
Wow.

303
00:19:34,351 --> 00:19:35,680
Wow.

304
00:19:37,438 --> 00:19:39,395
Is something the matter, sir?

305
00:19:41,859 --> 00:19:44,314
-That's an echo, sir.
-Yeah, you try it.

306
00:19:44,820 --> 00:19:46,860
-Me, sir?
-lt's a lot of fun.

307
00:19:51,869 --> 00:19:54,360
Come on, you can do it louder than that.

308
00:20:02,463 --> 00:20:04,254
-Serious.
-Thank you, sir.

309
00:20:04,507 --> 00:20:07,626
Hey, buddy, how you doing?
You want to give it a shot?

310
00:20:09,762 --> 00:20:10,675
Nice.

311
00:20:13,098 --> 00:20:15,850
You guys want to join us?
Make a weird noise.

312
00:20:24,610 --> 00:20:28,359
That was a great time. Well, I'm tired.
I'd like to go to sleep.

313
00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:31,448
-This way.
-Thank you very much. Good night.

314
00:20:31,534 --> 00:20:32,732
Good night.

315
00:20:41,293 --> 00:20:44,793
You just going to lie there
and let the Post take your story?

316
00:20:58,394 --> 00:21:00,054
What's up, New York?

317
00:21:11,115 --> 00:21:11,532
He had a water fountain in his room.
I love it.

318
00:21:11,532 --> 00:21:14,070
He had a water fountain in his room.
I love it.

319
00:21:22,543 --> 00:21:24,203
That's Hawaiian Punch.

320
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,249
He adored...

321
00:21:26,422 --> 00:21:27,833
...Hawaiian Punch.

322
00:21:27,923 --> 00:21:31,968
Wow! You kind of just snuck up on me.

323
00:21:32,553 --> 00:21:35,803
I fear you're underestimating
the sneakiness.

324
00:21:36,015 --> 00:21:38,719
I guess I was.
What are you doing down there?

325
00:21:38,976 --> 00:21:41,514
I am assisting you with your sock change.

326
00:21:41,604 --> 00:21:44,854
You'd change my socks for me?
You don't got to do that. Stand up.

327
00:21:44,940 --> 00:21:45,722
Thank you.

328
00:21:45,816 --> 00:21:48,603
Besides, you don't want
to have to touch my right foot.

329
00:21:48,694 --> 00:21:52,478
I got wicked bad frostbite when I was
in the Scouts. Check it out.

330
00:21:57,786 --> 00:21:59,329
Pretty messed up, huh?

331
00:21:59,413 --> 00:22:03,707
The hideousness of that foot
will haunt my dreams forever.

332
00:22:04,501 --> 00:22:06,375
Yeah, I've heard that before.

333
00:22:06,462 --> 00:22:09,379
But the weird thing is
I got no feeling left in it.

334
00:22:09,465 --> 00:22:12,335
So you could jump on it
and it wouldn't hurt me.

335
00:22:12,510 --> 00:22:15,676
-Go ahead, jump on it.
-I'd really rather not, sir.

336
00:22:15,763 --> 00:22:17,471
Please jump on my foot.

337
00:22:27,900 --> 00:22:29,228
I didn't feel that.

338
00:22:29,318 --> 00:22:33,398
What else you got? Get that
fireplace poker and whack my foot.

339
00:22:33,739 --> 00:22:37,357
-Do I absolutely have to?
-lt's going to be fun. Just grab it.

340
00:22:39,036 --> 00:22:41,907
All my friends do this when they're wasted.

341
00:22:42,331 --> 00:22:43,327
Come on.

342
00:22:44,583 --> 00:22:46,375
Go ahead, give it a whack.

343
00:22:49,755 --> 00:22:51,036
-Nothing.
-Really?

344
00:22:51,131 --> 00:22:52,507
Isn't that sick?

345
00:22:54,009 --> 00:22:56,417
Didn't feel that. Isn't that awesome?
Go ahead.

346
00:22:56,512 --> 00:22:57,508
Nothing.

347
00:22:58,264 --> 00:23:01,798
You're starting to like it, aren't you?
Chop that wood!

348
00:23:02,184 --> 00:23:03,465
That's it!

349
00:23:05,187 --> 00:23:08,556
You're sick! You're sick!
Why would you do that?

350
00:23:08,649 --> 00:23:10,558
I'm just kidding you, pal.

351
00:23:11,902 --> 00:23:15,567
-You had me going there.
-I saw your face, you were like...

352
00:23:17,283 --> 00:23:20,983
I got to find out from Cedar and Anderson
what I'm supposed to do today.

353
00:23:21,078 --> 00:23:24,696
So could you take that out of my foot?
I'm nailed to the ground.

354
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:26,072
There you go.

355
00:23:26,709 --> 00:23:30,042
I must insist on absolute secrecy
regarding this discussion...

356
00:23:30,129 --> 00:23:32,702
...till I've officially acquired
Mr. Blake's shares.

357
00:23:32,798 --> 00:23:35,289
If that's acceptable,
then as far as I'm concerned...

358
00:23:35,384 --> 00:23:38,005
...you've just bought 2,000 radio stations.

359
00:23:39,180 --> 00:23:40,425
Good morning.

360
00:23:41,765 --> 00:23:42,761
Deeds.

361
00:23:43,184 --> 00:23:44,298
What's up?

362
00:23:44,810 --> 00:23:46,518
Doing a little business.

363
00:23:49,607 --> 00:23:53,390
This room's an echo room, too.
I'm sure you guys already knew that.

364
00:23:54,320 --> 00:23:55,351
May I help you?

365
00:23:55,446 --> 00:23:58,815
I just wanted to see
if there's anything I should do today.

366
00:23:59,825 --> 00:24:02,067
I think we've got everything under control.

367
00:24:02,161 --> 00:24:06,787
There's got to be something. Until I sign
those papers I own this place, right?

368
00:24:08,334 --> 00:24:09,496
What?

369
00:24:10,002 --> 00:24:12,410
Ladies and gentlemen,
pardon me a moment, please.

370
00:24:12,505 --> 00:24:13,584
Of course.

371
00:24:13,672 --> 00:24:17,373
What's up, buddy? I was dreaming
about Frosties all last night. You?

372
00:24:17,468 --> 00:24:20,635
I tried to make my own at home,
but it wasn't the same.

373
00:24:21,847 --> 00:24:22,629
Deeds.

374
00:24:22,723 --> 00:24:26,673
Every stockholder, large and small,
has a say in the operation of this company.

375
00:24:26,769 --> 00:24:29,390
They have this say
at the annual stockholders' meeting.

376
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:33,098
The other 364 days of the year,
the officers of the company, like me...

377
00:24:33,192 --> 00:24:35,944
-...run the show.
-You mean now that my uncle's gone.

378
00:24:36,028 --> 00:24:38,353
Yeah, and it's not all fun and games.

379
00:24:38,697 --> 00:24:41,948
This company is a player on so many levels
and in so many areas...

380
00:24:42,034 --> 00:24:45,284
...that running it is literally
a 24-hour-a-day job.

381
00:24:45,871 --> 00:24:48,541
I only got three hours of sleep last night.

382
00:24:48,874 --> 00:24:51,544
Then it's actually a 21-hour-a-day job, huh?

383
00:24:51,877 --> 00:24:54,878
Move it, lady.
I don't give a damn about no meeting.

384
00:24:54,964 --> 00:24:56,672
Mr. Cedar, I am sorry...

385
00:24:56,882 --> 00:25:01,260
I passed for 3,500 yards last season
and I ain't gonna touch a football...

386
00:25:01,345 --> 00:25:05,888
...until you get off your fat, rich asses
and renegotiate my bullshit contract.

387
00:25:06,892 --> 00:25:10,095
Easy with the language, buddy.
There are ladies present.

388
00:25:10,896 --> 00:25:13,268
Shut the hell up, rich boy!

389
00:25:13,941 --> 00:25:17,476
I want more money,
or you all can just suck my...

390
00:25:21,991 --> 00:25:23,236
I warned you.

391
00:25:24,618 --> 00:25:28,698
You went down like a sack of potatoes,
I'll tell you that much. Come on.

392
00:25:30,082 --> 00:25:32,454
Come on, big man. Upsy-daisy.

393
00:25:32,626 --> 00:25:35,034
Ladies and gentlemen, football!

394
00:25:36,422 --> 00:25:38,794
What's the problem with your contract?

395
00:25:39,383 --> 00:25:43,381
I figured if I played well,
I'd renegotiate and get more money.

396
00:25:43,762 --> 00:25:46,966
If you didn't play well,
could we renegotiate and pay you less?

397
00:25:47,057 --> 00:25:48,220
Shit, no!

398
00:25:48,726 --> 00:25:50,386
I mean, no.

399
00:25:51,437 --> 00:25:53,513
Doesn't seem fair to me.

400
00:25:53,606 --> 00:25:57,935
-He led the League in touchdown passes.
-That's okay, Chuck. I got this one.

401
00:25:58,235 --> 00:26:00,905
Listen, fellows, I want more money...

402
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:03,901
...or I ain't even gonna play another down.

403
00:26:06,785 --> 00:26:09,027
Well, we'll have to let you go then.

404
00:26:09,914 --> 00:26:12,749
-Let me go?
-Yeah, you're fired.

405
00:26:14,376 --> 00:26:16,084
So can I sign with another team?

406
00:26:16,170 --> 00:26:19,040
You can do anything.
I suggest you change your attitude...

407
00:26:19,131 --> 00:26:21,622
...or nobody will want to work with you.

408
00:26:22,551 --> 00:26:23,547
'Bye.

409
00:26:25,137 --> 00:26:26,133
Deeds.

410
00:26:26,430 --> 00:26:29,929
Kevin won the Heisman Trophy
two years ago. He is our best player.

411
00:26:30,017 --> 00:26:33,718
-Don't worry, he'll be back.
-Biggest mistake of your lives!

412
00:26:34,021 --> 00:26:35,515
This thing is cool.

413
00:26:36,023 --> 00:26:40,234
Why don't you get out and enjoy the city?
Everything's fine here. Take that with you.

414
00:26:40,319 --> 00:26:43,770
I'll leave it here. That's all right.
But call me if you need me.

415
00:26:43,864 --> 00:26:46,949
-Absolutely.
-Thanks. Love you, Anderson.

416
00:26:47,118 --> 00:26:51,411
All you guys, I noticed you were French.
The opposite of bonjour to you.

417
00:26:54,667 --> 00:26:56,244
You look so hot as a blond.

418
00:26:56,335 --> 00:26:59,252
It's not too streaky?
I feel like he did it really streaky.

419
00:26:59,338 --> 00:27:02,624
I love it, but let me go undercover.
This could get dangerous.

420
00:27:02,716 --> 00:27:06,796
He said he likes ladies in distress,
not men who wear too much cologne.

421
00:27:07,054 --> 00:27:09,296
-There he is.
-Thanks for the tour.

422
00:27:09,390 --> 00:27:12,759
-You're welcome.
-Hidden cameras on, ready? Molest me.

423
00:27:13,894 --> 00:27:15,686
-Molest me!
-You got it!

424
00:27:15,771 --> 00:27:17,764
-God, help!
-Give it to me.

425
00:27:17,940 --> 00:27:19,932
-Help, I'm being mugged!
-All right!

426
00:27:20,025 --> 00:27:22,481
Help! Help! I'm being mugged!

427
00:27:23,153 --> 00:27:25,823
-Stop it!
-Good luck. See you at the office.

428
00:27:27,449 --> 00:27:29,941
-Don't worry, I'll get him.
-Oh, shit!

429
00:27:30,953 --> 00:27:32,364
Stop right there.

430
00:27:37,626 --> 00:27:38,871
Come on!

431
00:27:43,048 --> 00:27:44,792
What's your problem, pal?

432
00:27:52,141 --> 00:27:53,386
Come up here.

433
00:27:54,977 --> 00:27:57,894
Got your pocketbook. Get a job, pal.

434
00:28:00,274 --> 00:28:01,472
Miss! Miss!

435
00:28:01,984 --> 00:28:04,736
-Are you okay?
-What happened?

436
00:28:04,820 --> 00:28:06,314
Let me help you up.

437
00:28:07,364 --> 00:28:09,357
All right, now. All right.

438
00:28:15,247 --> 00:28:18,533
Ma'am, you were just the victim
of a New York City mugger.

439
00:28:18,626 --> 00:28:21,081
As I suspected,
he was a coward and a weakling.

440
00:28:21,170 --> 00:28:23,922
And also wore more cologne
than any man should wear.

441
00:28:24,006 --> 00:28:26,675
-I got this back for you, though.
-Thank you.

442
00:28:27,968 --> 00:28:30,803
-Can I take you to the hospital?
-No, no.

443
00:28:31,764 --> 00:28:36,177
I'll be all right.
I just feel a little dizzy and violated.

444
00:28:37,061 --> 00:28:38,389
I'm fine.

445
00:28:41,398 --> 00:28:44,150
Please, let me take you
to the emergency room.

446
00:28:45,194 --> 00:28:47,946
I'm sure I'll be all right. I just need to...

447
00:28:48,364 --> 00:28:50,321
...perhaps walk it off or...

448
00:28:50,407 --> 00:28:52,115
-Could you?
-Sure.

449
00:28:52,201 --> 00:28:53,280
Thank you.

450
00:28:54,495 --> 00:28:55,954
Thank you so much.

451
00:28:56,997 --> 00:28:59,667
My name is Pam. Pam Dawson.

452
00:29:00,292 --> 00:29:04,586
My name is Deeds. I'm not from here.
I'm just visiting.

453
00:29:06,173 --> 00:29:07,881
Where do you hail from?

454
00:29:08,217 --> 00:29:12,713
Mandrake Falls, New Hampshire.
Just a little town nobody's ever heard of.

455
00:29:13,347 --> 00:29:15,505
I'm from a little town like that.

456
00:29:16,058 --> 00:29:18,976
-ln lowa.
-ls that right? What part?

457
00:29:20,479 --> 00:29:23,599
Winchestertonfieldville.

458
00:29:25,401 --> 00:29:29,529
Yes, the small town
of Winchestertonfieldville, lowa.

459
00:29:32,408 --> 00:29:33,606
I'm sorry.

460
00:29:33,701 --> 00:29:36,785
-What are you doing in New York?
-I'm a school nurse.

461
00:29:37,580 --> 00:29:41,494
-There's no way you're a school nurse.
-Why, don't you believe me?

462
00:29:41,959 --> 00:29:44,284
You're too nice to be a school nurse.

463
00:29:44,587 --> 00:29:48,335
My school nurse was so mean,
every time I'd tell her I had a tummy ache...

464
00:29:48,424 --> 00:29:51,378
...she'd send me back to my class
and say, "Stop whining."

465
00:29:51,468 --> 00:29:54,256
-But that's awful!
-Well, I said it every day.

466
00:29:56,515 --> 00:29:58,009
I missed my mother.

467
00:29:59,518 --> 00:30:00,847
That's sweet.

468
00:30:01,604 --> 00:30:02,802
Miss Dawson?

469
00:30:03,439 --> 00:30:06,356
How would you like to maybe go out...

470
00:30:06,442 --> 00:30:09,063
...and have a New York City dinner with me?

471
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:10,482
Golly.

472
00:30:12,156 --> 00:30:13,947
That sounds wonderful.

473
00:30:14,158 --> 00:30:15,617
-lt does?
-Yeah.

474
00:30:16,035 --> 00:30:18,277
-Let's do it, then.
-Okay.

475
00:30:19,663 --> 00:30:21,620
Damn you, Old Spice.

476
00:30:25,127 --> 00:30:28,828
So you run this pizza place
and you have your poetry.

477
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:31,714
What brings you to the big city?

478
00:30:31,801 --> 00:30:34,338
Actually, I just inherited $40 billion.

479
00:30:35,471 --> 00:30:39,634
Well, that's nice, but I think anything
over $30 billion is just gravy.

480
00:30:42,686 --> 00:30:43,931
I like that.

481
00:30:45,022 --> 00:30:47,893
Your hair is very blond and pretty.

482
00:30:47,983 --> 00:30:51,317
I'm of Swedish ancestry.

483
00:30:52,112 --> 00:30:53,655
-Really?
-Yes.

484
00:30:54,532 --> 00:30:57,486
My grandfather was in ABBA.

485
00:30:58,953 --> 00:31:00,577
ABBA, the band?

486
00:31:01,205 --> 00:31:05,072
Excuse me,
do you get any famous people in here?

487
00:31:05,167 --> 00:31:06,578
Famous, rich, powerful.

488
00:31:06,669 --> 00:31:09,504
Really? We don't get
any famous people in Mandrake Falls.

489
00:31:09,588 --> 00:31:12,079
Stephen King stopped by
our gas station one time...

490
00:31:12,174 --> 00:31:14,546
...but everyone was too scared
to talk to him.

491
00:31:14,635 --> 00:31:16,426
I'd imagine he'd be very spooky.

492
00:31:16,512 --> 00:31:19,881
Jake, the gas station attendant,
made eye contact with him.

493
00:31:19,974 --> 00:31:21,931
That night he lost 200 pounds.

494
00:31:24,144 --> 00:31:25,140
Wow.

495
00:31:26,063 --> 00:31:28,269
Your chicken parmesan
should be ready soon.

496
00:31:28,357 --> 00:31:32,569
Okay, buddy. I saw a couple over there.
It's their anniversary.

497
00:31:33,195 --> 00:31:36,030
Give them this.
Don't say it's from us, though.

498
00:31:36,740 --> 00:31:38,199
This is like $20,000.

499
00:31:38,284 --> 00:31:42,115
Tell them it was a restaurant giveaway
or something. Thanks, buddy.

500
00:31:43,372 --> 00:31:46,788
That's an awfully nice way
to start spending your money.

501
00:31:46,876 --> 00:31:48,952
-ls that who I think it is?
-Who?

502
00:31:49,545 --> 00:31:52,380
Preston Blake's nephew,
the $40-billion man.

503
00:31:53,299 --> 00:31:55,125
We have to meet him. Dave?

504
00:31:55,509 --> 00:31:58,510
Gosh, I hope that mugger got home okay.

505
00:31:58,846 --> 00:32:00,174
-Mr. Deeds.
-Yeah.

506
00:32:00,264 --> 00:32:03,384
Mr. Simonds would like
to invite you to join his party.

507
00:32:03,934 --> 00:32:05,132
Why is that?

508
00:32:05,519 --> 00:32:07,678
Just to enjoy the pleasure of your company.

509
00:32:07,771 --> 00:32:09,811
Wow, that's pretty cool of him.

510
00:32:14,194 --> 00:32:16,271
That was a very nice hug, Deeds.

511
00:32:16,405 --> 00:32:19,774
It's wicked nice of you to invite us over.
This is awesome.

512
00:32:19,992 --> 00:32:23,076
-Have we met?
-Not unless you have a sick kid.

513
00:32:23,495 --> 00:32:26,699
You're a very important man
in this town now, Mr. Deeds.

514
00:32:26,791 --> 00:32:28,201
I don't know about that.

515
00:32:28,292 --> 00:32:30,119
I sing at the Metropolitan Opera...

516
00:32:30,210 --> 00:32:33,876
...and Blake Media contributes
50 percent of our budget.

517
00:32:33,964 --> 00:32:35,874
So, on behalf of the opera:

518
00:32:35,966 --> 00:32:39,916
"Thank you"

519
00:32:43,098 --> 00:32:44,509
That was awesome!

520
00:32:44,850 --> 00:32:48,017
You shouldn't thank me, though.
You should thank my great-uncle.

521
00:32:48,103 --> 00:32:49,479
He was an interesting man.

522
00:32:49,563 --> 00:32:51,971
I served on the board
of the Guggenheim with him.

523
00:32:52,066 --> 00:32:55,399
Really? I'm not sure what that is,
but good luck with it.

524
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:59,155
I'd love to write a piece on you
for The New Yorker.

525
00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:00,817
What's The New Yorker?

526
00:33:01,784 --> 00:33:03,159
It's a magazine.

527
00:33:03,953 --> 00:33:06,622
With essays, witty cartoons.

528
00:33:07,331 --> 00:33:11,281
I read the Mandrake Falls Gazette
and they got some cartoons in there also.

529
00:33:11,377 --> 00:33:13,950
You know who's a riot?
That Beetle Bailey guy.

530
00:33:14,046 --> 00:33:16,917
He's always wearing his hat
and doing his thing.

531
00:33:17,258 --> 00:33:20,045
But it is an honour to meet
a real writer like you, George.

532
00:33:20,135 --> 00:33:22,757
I've been trying
to get my stuff published for years...

533
00:33:22,847 --> 00:33:25,053
...but Hallmark is one tough cookie to crack.

534
00:33:25,140 --> 00:33:27,678
-Hallmark?
-He writes greeting cards.

535
00:33:28,394 --> 00:33:31,560
-I try.
-You must share one with us.

536
00:33:31,647 --> 00:33:35,230
-I don't know about that, Mr. French.
-Who's Mr. French?

537
00:33:35,317 --> 00:33:38,603
-Doesn't he look like Mr. French?
-I've never heard of him.

538
00:33:38,696 --> 00:33:39,645
Come on.

539
00:33:39,738 --> 00:33:41,363
All right, I'll give you one.

540
00:33:41,448 --> 00:33:44,070
This is a Mother's Day card
I've been working on.

541
00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:48,240
"Mom, you are the one
who brought me to planet Earth

542
00:33:49,123 --> 00:33:52,243
"You are the one who suffered
through my 14-hour birth

543
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:56,910
"You're the one who made lemonade for me
after I'd come back from play

544
00:33:57,339 --> 00:34:01,467
"I love you, Mom,
so have a wicked nice Mother's Day"

545
00:34:02,011 --> 00:34:03,553
Something like that.

546
00:34:04,221 --> 00:34:07,471
-An instant classic!
-"Genius, genius, genius"

547
00:34:07,850 --> 00:34:10,222
Do you write your poems with a crayon?

548
00:34:14,189 --> 00:34:15,470
It's amazing!

549
00:34:16,817 --> 00:34:19,735
I see why you brought me here.
To goof on me, huh?

550
00:34:20,196 --> 00:34:22,769
-Don't be silly, Deeds.
-Pipe down, George.

551
00:34:23,198 --> 00:34:26,235
I may seem funny to you,
but if you came to Mandrake Falls...

552
00:34:26,327 --> 00:34:29,447
...you might seem funny to us.
Only nobody would laugh at you...

553
00:34:29,538 --> 00:34:32,409
...and make you feel stupid,
that wouldn't be good manners.

554
00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:36,165
Maybe my poems aren't that great,
but I know some people who like them.

555
00:34:36,253 --> 00:34:40,298
Anyways, it's the best I can do.
We're going to get going.

556
00:34:40,382 --> 00:34:43,586
Sorry about that, Pam.
I hope I didn't embarrass you.

557
00:34:48,599 --> 00:34:52,217
And if it wasn't for Miss Dawson being here,
I'd knock your heads in.

558
00:34:52,311 --> 00:34:53,509
I don't mind.

559
00:34:53,812 --> 00:34:54,808
Okay.

560
00:34:58,484 --> 00:34:59,479
"No!"

561
00:35:06,241 --> 00:35:10,109
I think I just shat myself.

562
00:35:10,996 --> 00:35:13,369
How would you like to see the sights now?

563
00:35:13,457 --> 00:35:15,995
I just need to powder my nose.

564
00:35:16,085 --> 00:35:18,623
That would be great. I'll get your coat.

565
00:35:19,088 --> 00:35:22,872
Hey, buddy, this will pay for everything
I damaged. Sorry about that.

566
00:35:22,967 --> 00:35:25,339
-Good to meet you guys.
-Thank you.

567
00:35:25,427 --> 00:35:27,171
God, that was good stuff.

568
00:35:30,641 --> 00:35:32,183
I want a raise, Mac.

569
00:35:36,564 --> 00:35:38,390
Hey, man! What's up?

570
00:35:38,691 --> 00:35:40,849
Holy cannoli, you're John McEnroe!

571
00:35:40,943 --> 00:35:44,027
I saw what you did to those guys
making fun of you. Nice work.

572
00:35:44,113 --> 00:35:47,232
You know what it's like to get riled up
don't you, Johnny Mac?

573
00:35:47,324 --> 00:35:50,160
-That I do.
-I'm Deeds, by the way.

574
00:35:50,244 --> 00:35:53,945
Deeds, nice to meet you.
You got to let me buy you a drink.

575
00:35:54,039 --> 00:35:55,831
Miss Dawson, this is John McEnroe.

576
00:35:55,916 --> 00:35:59,581
-Miss Dawson, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you, too.

577
00:35:59,795 --> 00:36:02,369
I promised Miss Dawson
I'd take her sightseeing.

578
00:36:02,465 --> 00:36:05,715
The sights are great.
I've seen the sights. I love the sights.

579
00:36:05,801 --> 00:36:08,885
Let me show you a New York
most people will never see.

580
00:36:09,346 --> 00:36:12,715
-That okay with you, Miss Dawson?
-Sounds like fun!

581
00:36:12,808 --> 00:36:15,299
Here's to a big night on the town.

582
00:36:27,781 --> 00:36:29,441
What happened?

583
00:36:29,533 --> 00:36:33,780
Here are some aspirins, Mr. Deeds.
They make your head seem smaller.

584
00:36:37,791 --> 00:36:40,958
-How did I get in these pyjamas?
-I changed you.

585
00:36:41,504 --> 00:36:43,164
I was very gentle, sir.

586
00:36:44,673 --> 00:36:48,007
I think I drank all the alcohol in Manhattan
last night.

587
00:36:48,302 --> 00:36:51,303
And you nearly succeeded,
according to Miss Dawson.

588
00:36:52,181 --> 00:36:55,846
Miss Dawson! I don't even remember
taking her home. Is she okay?

589
00:36:55,935 --> 00:36:59,185
I took the liberty of sending her off
in the company limousine.

590
00:36:59,271 --> 00:37:02,272
She was a lady in distress and I helped her.

591
00:37:02,858 --> 00:37:04,768
Dreamt about her last night.

592
00:37:05,069 --> 00:37:08,153
Usually, when you get blackout drunk
you don't dream.

593
00:37:09,406 --> 00:37:10,486
So I read.

594
00:37:15,079 --> 00:37:16,489
What's up, Chuck?

595
00:37:19,917 --> 00:37:22,075
America's newest billionaire...

596
00:37:23,796 --> 00:37:25,835
-...stupid and drunk.
-What's this?

597
00:37:25,923 --> 00:37:28,840
It was quite a night for Longfellow Deeds.

598
00:37:28,926 --> 00:37:31,547
They'll know my name is Longfellow.

599
00:37:32,012 --> 00:37:34,503
After punching out some society types...

600
00:37:35,891 --> 00:37:40,304
...Deeds joined forces with the original
bad boy of tennis, John McEnroe.

601
00:37:40,604 --> 00:37:43,060
And stupidity won in straight sets.

602
00:37:50,031 --> 00:37:51,940
How'd they get that footage?

603
00:37:52,241 --> 00:37:53,901
Watch out, Johnny!

604
00:37:56,579 --> 00:37:59,745
What kind of driving is that?
You're a fucking disgrace!

605
00:38:00,416 --> 00:38:02,455
No, sir. You're a disgrace.

606
00:38:02,543 --> 00:38:04,832
-We did it, man!
-Johnny McEnroe!

607
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,254
Look at Deedsy hanging out with McEnroe!
That's awesome!

608
00:38:09,008 --> 00:38:10,632
I love the Beach Boys.

609
00:38:11,343 --> 00:38:13,466
Here I go, here I go.

610
00:38:15,848 --> 00:38:18,635
This is not the kind of attention
we need right now.

611
00:38:18,726 --> 00:38:19,805
What do you mean?

612
00:38:19,894 --> 00:38:22,729
For the moment
you're the largest stockholder...

613
00:38:22,813 --> 00:38:25,351
...and people might think
any instability you show...

614
00:38:25,441 --> 00:38:27,932
...may equal instability in the company.

615
00:38:31,697 --> 00:38:32,693
My bad.

616
00:38:34,742 --> 00:38:36,984
My bad. My bad.

617
00:38:37,077 --> 00:38:38,026
Okay. Okay.

618
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:39,199
-My bad.
-Okay.

619
00:38:39,288 --> 00:38:42,455
Shall I call your car, Mr. Cedar,
to take you to the funeral?

620
00:38:42,541 --> 00:38:43,870
What funeral?

621
00:38:44,793 --> 00:38:46,418
Your great-uncle's funeral.

622
00:38:46,503 --> 00:38:48,662
-His funeral's today?
-Today, yes.

623
00:38:48,839 --> 00:38:50,631
I'll go get my suit on.

624
00:38:58,140 --> 00:39:00,263
-Cute, bigmouth.
-Sir?

625
00:39:00,684 --> 00:39:03,056
As soon as that moron goes back
to Cowpie Falls...

626
00:39:03,145 --> 00:39:06,182
...you are out of here
on your fat Puerto Rican ass.

627
00:39:10,820 --> 00:39:12,527
I hail from Spain, sir.

628
00:39:18,702 --> 00:39:19,947
Ole.

629
00:39:21,330 --> 00:39:25,410
Now, Brother Preston is soaring
with eagles high above.

630
00:39:26,669 --> 00:39:29,290
Because he lived a life of love.

631
00:39:30,881 --> 00:39:33,716
Yes, he's flying way up high...

632
00:39:34,677 --> 00:39:37,250
...because he was a super cool guy.

633
00:39:38,597 --> 00:39:41,966
He's gone away, too soon, it seems...

634
00:39:42,601 --> 00:39:45,519
...leaving behind his unfinished dreams.

635
00:39:45,855 --> 00:39:48,606
This guy could make a fortune
writing greeting cards.

636
00:39:48,691 --> 00:39:51,526
Yes, we remember Preston Blake...

637
00:39:52,027 --> 00:39:54,863
...a man with faith no man could shake.

638
00:39:55,698 --> 00:39:57,856
A strength no man could break.

639
00:39:58,409 --> 00:40:00,900
A character no man could fake.

640
00:40:01,704 --> 00:40:04,277
For goodness sake, let's eat some cake.

641
00:40:04,665 --> 00:40:06,124
Amen.

642
00:40:08,043 --> 00:40:10,961
Excuse me, Reverend,
that was a grand slam.

643
00:40:11,046 --> 00:40:13,964
That part with soaring with the eagles
gave me goose bumps.

644
00:40:14,049 --> 00:40:17,383
-Thank you, my brother.
-My friend got me a mug for my birthday.

645
00:40:17,469 --> 00:40:21,467
It says, "It's hard to soar with the eagles
when you're surrounded by turkeys."

646
00:40:21,557 --> 00:40:23,514
But what you said was better.

647
00:40:23,726 --> 00:40:25,006
It's all good.

648
00:40:25,394 --> 00:40:29,308
Rest in peace, Preston.
That concludes today's service.

649
00:40:30,858 --> 00:40:33,396
I actually thought I would say something.

650
00:40:34,945 --> 00:40:37,650
Deedsy was always
the best speaker in school.

651
00:40:38,323 --> 00:40:39,154
Deedsy?

652
00:40:39,241 --> 00:40:41,649
That's some job, by the way, Your Majesty.

653
00:40:41,744 --> 00:40:44,116
I thought we were watching Scooby-Doo.

654
00:40:44,580 --> 00:40:48,744
Hi, my name is Deeds.
I was Preston Blake's great-nephew.

655
00:40:49,168 --> 00:40:52,501
I wrote a poem for him
on my way over here, in my head.

656
00:40:52,838 --> 00:40:55,246
And I'm going to recite it for you.

657
00:40:55,925 --> 00:40:59,922
I didn't realize I'd be following
the rhyme-master Reverend Sharpton.

658
00:41:00,387 --> 00:41:02,095
But here we go anyways.

659
00:41:02,681 --> 00:41:05,635
"You climbed mountains
and built skyscrapers

660
00:41:06,852 --> 00:41:10,766
"You made TV shows
and put out newspapers

661
00:41:12,441 --> 00:41:15,014
"You were wicked good at doing stocks

662
00:41:16,153 --> 00:41:19,024
"You liked it
when Emilio would change your socks

663
00:41:20,282 --> 00:41:23,117
"We never hung out and that makes me sad

664
00:41:23,953 --> 00:41:26,278
"All the good times we could've had"

665
00:41:26,998 --> 00:41:28,456
Nice rhyme.

666
00:41:28,916 --> 00:41:32,367
"But when I die, Uncle Preston,
you better say, 'Cheers!'

667
00:41:33,128 --> 00:41:35,798
"'Cause me and you are hanging
at the pearly gates

668
00:41:35,881 --> 00:41:39,796
"I'll bring the beers, I'll bring the beers"

669
00:41:40,511 --> 00:41:41,590
He's good.

670
00:41:42,137 --> 00:41:43,133
Amen.

671
00:41:43,222 --> 00:41:46,887
I know this is supposed to be
a closed casket, but where I come from...

672
00:41:46,976 --> 00:41:50,890
...we feel it's good to see the body
for the grieving process, so...

673
00:41:53,607 --> 00:41:56,608
Sorry about that!
I'll keep this sucker closed.

674
00:42:01,448 --> 00:42:03,275
He's still pretty frozen.

675
00:42:03,909 --> 00:42:05,154
Almost there.

676
00:42:07,413 --> 00:42:09,820
I'll keep an eye on the company for you.
Love you.

677
00:42:09,915 --> 00:42:12,585
Nice meeting you.
Thanks for the apartment.

678
00:42:12,668 --> 00:42:14,043
That was freaky.

679
00:42:14,336 --> 00:42:16,128
Everybody drive home safe.

680
00:42:16,213 --> 00:42:18,289
Man, this guy is in way over his head.

681
00:42:18,382 --> 00:42:20,541
-Take care.
-You'll see him tonight?

682
00:42:20,634 --> 00:42:23,968
Yes, I'm calling around 4:00.
That's when I get off work.

683
00:42:24,179 --> 00:42:26,884
Remember, I'm Pam Dawson,
virgin school nurse...

684
00:42:27,016 --> 00:42:29,803
...from Winchestertonfieldville, lowa.

685
00:42:32,229 --> 00:42:33,640
That's priceless.

686
00:42:35,065 --> 00:42:36,310
You, a virgin.

687
00:42:42,865 --> 00:42:45,356
-All right, thank you.
-Excuse me, sir.

688
00:42:45,784 --> 00:42:48,192
-I told him he could have that.
-Thanks.

689
00:42:48,287 --> 00:42:50,078
Right on. Nice seeing you.

690
00:42:50,164 --> 00:42:52,951
You need to use our bathroom,
come back and use it, okay?

691
00:42:53,041 --> 00:42:54,999
Will do, Deeds!

692
00:42:56,462 --> 00:42:58,620
How do you think I did at the funeral today?

693
00:42:58,714 --> 00:43:00,541
You spoke beautifully, sir.

694
00:43:00,674 --> 00:43:01,837
I still feel bad.

695
00:43:01,926 --> 00:43:05,626
I snapped my uncle's hand off
when I put him back in the casket.

696
00:43:06,096 --> 00:43:08,173
Lucky for him, he was dead, sir.

697
00:43:08,557 --> 00:43:11,178
Even though his face was frozen that way...

698
00:43:11,477 --> 00:43:14,644
...it looked to me like he was a happy guy.
Am I right?

699
00:43:14,813 --> 00:43:17,518
-He truly was.
-Come on, sit down, please.

700
00:43:18,025 --> 00:43:21,476
And I got to hang out with him,
just like this...

701
00:43:21,987 --> 00:43:24,110
...almost every day for 30 years.

702
00:43:24,615 --> 00:43:26,323
What did you guys talk about?

703
00:43:26,408 --> 00:43:30,572
We spoke of life, love, art, wine, business.

704
00:43:30,996 --> 00:43:32,704
I learned much from him.

705
00:43:32,998 --> 00:43:35,038
-I bet you miss him, too.
-I do.

706
00:43:35,334 --> 00:43:37,243
He was like a parent to me.

707
00:43:38,003 --> 00:43:41,088
You see, I never knew my father,
and Mama...

708
00:43:41,674 --> 00:43:44,295
...she passed while giving the birth to me.

709
00:43:47,429 --> 00:43:49,967
-You want some Cocoa Pebbles?
-No, thanks.

710
00:43:50,599 --> 00:43:53,885
I have much work to do.

711
00:43:54,186 --> 00:43:57,472
-Thanks. You don't have to do that.
-Enjoy your Pebbles.

712
00:43:58,857 --> 00:44:00,268
One more thing.

713
00:44:00,901 --> 00:44:04,566
Your great-uncle did not let me
change his socks for him, either.

714
00:44:05,531 --> 00:44:06,776
I like feet.

715
00:44:07,783 --> 00:44:09,242
I do not know why.

716
00:44:17,626 --> 00:44:18,456
Hello.

717
00:44:18,544 --> 00:44:21,213
Hi, Deeds? It's Pam. Pam Dawson.

718
00:44:21,297 --> 00:44:25,294
I'm so happy you called.
I'm wicked sorry about last night.

719
00:44:25,384 --> 00:44:26,961
I don't drink very often.

720
00:44:27,052 --> 00:44:29,923
I thought you held your liquor very well.

721
00:44:30,014 --> 00:44:32,421
Unfortunately, I couldn't hold it for too long.

722
00:44:32,516 --> 00:44:36,134
That's okay.
I didn't really like that skirt anyway.

723
00:44:37,438 --> 00:44:40,889
I'm getting a call on the other line.
Can you hang on for a second?

724
00:44:40,983 --> 00:44:42,643
-Sure.
-Thank you.

725
00:44:43,319 --> 00:44:44,101
Hello.

726
00:44:44,195 --> 00:44:47,563
Mr. Deeds, this is Kevin Ward,
the quarterback you punched.

727
00:44:47,781 --> 00:44:49,192
What's up, buddy?

728
00:44:49,366 --> 00:44:54,324
I wanted to say that I was thinking it over
and I'd like to live up to my word.

729
00:44:54,580 --> 00:44:56,371
And I'd like to win you a Super Bowl.

730
00:44:56,457 --> 00:44:59,826
-That's terrific, pal.
-And my daddy wants to speak to you.

731
00:45:00,503 --> 00:45:02,910
Deeds. Buddy Ward here, Kevin's daddy.

732
00:45:03,005 --> 00:45:04,168
How you doing, Mr. Ward?

733
00:45:04,256 --> 00:45:06,629
I just want to thank you
for teaching my boy a lesson.

734
00:45:06,717 --> 00:45:10,715
He's a good kid. He just has to watch
his language in front of the ladies.

735
00:45:13,807 --> 00:45:15,930
I'll remind Kevin where he comes from.

736
00:45:16,018 --> 00:45:17,477
That sounds terrific.

737
00:45:17,561 --> 00:45:20,681
You used foul language in front of a lady?

738
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:22,685
No, Daddy, no!

739
00:45:26,821 --> 00:45:27,686
Pam.

740
00:45:28,030 --> 00:45:29,193
Still here.

741
00:45:29,281 --> 00:45:30,906
How's it going? You at work?

742
00:45:30,991 --> 00:45:34,158
-Yep, here in the nurse's office.
-Any customers?

743
00:45:34,954 --> 00:45:37,112
Customers? Oh, sick kids.

744
00:45:38,082 --> 00:45:41,415
Well, little Billy Barty's here.

745
00:45:42,252 --> 00:45:47,247
-You're not feeling too good, Billy?
-Miss Dawson, my tummy hurts.

746
00:45:47,550 --> 00:45:50,005
Why don't you just lay back and relax?

747
00:45:50,636 --> 00:45:52,213
That was nice. Good job.

748
00:45:52,304 --> 00:45:56,053
I've got too much doo-doo
in my underpants.

749
00:45:57,142 --> 00:45:59,468
Make the stinky go away.

750
00:45:59,854 --> 00:46:02,854
Well, you sound like
you got your hands full, so...

751
00:46:02,982 --> 00:46:04,974
...l'll just come out with it.

752
00:46:05,234 --> 00:46:08,235
How would you like
to do something with me tonight?

753
00:46:08,612 --> 00:46:10,521
I'd love to do something with you.

754
00:46:10,614 --> 00:46:11,563
Great.

755
00:46:11,698 --> 00:46:14,368
We can't go out drinking.
I got our company in trouble.

756
00:46:14,451 --> 00:46:18,070
That's okay.
I was brought up never to drink alcohol.

757
00:46:18,789 --> 00:46:20,746
Not even rum raisin ice cream.

758
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,621
I like that. I'll think of something good.

759
00:46:24,211 --> 00:46:25,242
See you tonight.

760
00:46:25,337 --> 00:46:26,535
Okay. 'Bye.

761
00:46:30,467 --> 00:46:32,010
I got to try this.

762
00:46:44,857 --> 00:46:46,268
Was that awesome?

763
00:46:47,943 --> 00:46:49,568
Am I out or safe?

764
00:46:51,405 --> 00:46:52,864
I'm with you.

765
00:46:54,825 --> 00:46:58,490
What is this?
My great-uncle's personal journal.

766
00:47:00,039 --> 00:47:02,530
-Should I read it?
-Family.

767
00:47:04,293 --> 00:47:06,084
Family, safe, good.

768
00:47:06,503 --> 00:47:10,169
All right, have a good night. My back hurts!

769
00:47:15,012 --> 00:47:17,384
-Nice doing business with you.
-Thank you.

770
00:47:17,473 --> 00:47:19,015
Thanks for the bikes.

771
00:47:19,099 --> 00:47:21,590
What are you gonna do with your $20,000?

772
00:47:21,685 --> 00:47:24,473
Buy a giraffe.
What are you gonna do with your $20,000?

773
00:47:24,563 --> 00:47:26,022
Quit school.

774
00:47:26,106 --> 00:47:30,270
Good idea, school is for fools. Look at me!

775
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:57,593
The park is beautiful.

776
00:47:58,514 --> 00:48:02,179
These trees, they remind you
of Winchestertonfieldville at all?

777
00:48:03,269 --> 00:48:05,594
Oh, yes. Very much so.

778
00:48:06,272 --> 00:48:08,430
What was it like growing up there?

779
00:48:08,565 --> 00:48:09,811
It was great.

780
00:48:10,526 --> 00:48:14,274
I remember walking down
to the corner drugstore...

781
00:48:14,363 --> 00:48:16,652
...and getting malted milkshakes.

782
00:48:17,783 --> 00:48:19,574
What was your house like?

783
00:48:20,035 --> 00:48:22,324
We had this big Victorian.

784
00:48:23,372 --> 00:48:25,080
Right off Main Street.

785
00:48:25,875 --> 00:48:29,623
-Blue shutters and a big red door.
-All right.

786
00:48:30,004 --> 00:48:33,918
-And a tire swing in the front yard.
-I love it.

787
00:48:34,383 --> 00:48:38,926
And I remember the time I fell out of
old Boo Radley's apple tree...

788
00:48:39,054 --> 00:48:40,596
...and broke my arm.

789
00:48:41,098 --> 00:48:45,511
And my father, before he passed away...

790
00:48:45,936 --> 00:48:48,178
...from the disease of the lepers...

791
00:48:48,272 --> 00:48:52,601
...he came and he scooped me up
and he ran me all the way to Dr. Pepper's.

792
00:48:54,236 --> 00:48:55,399
Dr. Pepper.

793
00:48:56,238 --> 00:48:57,234
Yeah.

794
00:48:57,531 --> 00:48:59,488
I'm glad that guy was around.

795
00:49:00,242 --> 00:49:02,484
-Want to sit down?
-Sure.

796
00:49:04,538 --> 00:49:06,246
-Thank you.
-My pleasure.

797
00:49:06,749 --> 00:49:10,200
I was reading my great-uncle's journal
on my way over to you.

798
00:49:10,294 --> 00:49:12,536
And, when he was age 9...

799
00:49:12,630 --> 00:49:16,378
...he wrote that he had the only family
on the block with a radio...

800
00:49:16,467 --> 00:49:19,384
...and he was dreaming
of becoming a disc jockey someday.

801
00:49:19,470 --> 00:49:21,795
A disc jockey?

802
00:49:24,099 --> 00:49:27,468
You know, when I was a kid,
I wanted to be a news reporter.

803
00:49:28,437 --> 00:49:31,189
I used to go around interviewing everyone...

804
00:49:31,273 --> 00:49:34,440
...and writing notes
in my little Holly Hobby notebook.

805
00:49:36,237 --> 00:49:39,487
People didn't like that. I got beat up a lot.

806
00:49:39,657 --> 00:49:43,606
-Do you remember their names?
-No, it was a long time ago.

807
00:49:44,787 --> 00:49:46,530
But my grandma said to me:

808
00:49:46,914 --> 00:49:50,117
"One day you'll grow up
and work for 60 Minutes...

809
00:49:50,209 --> 00:49:52,700
"...and make a difference in the world."

810
00:49:53,212 --> 00:49:57,292
You do make a difference in the world,
every day. You're a school nurse.

811
00:50:00,427 --> 00:50:02,550
Anyways, this is what happened
to my uncle.

812
00:50:02,638 --> 00:50:06,849
Later on in his life, he'd go
to this radio station that he owned...

813
00:50:06,934 --> 00:50:09,852
...at 3:00 in the morning and DJ for an hour.

814
00:50:09,937 --> 00:50:11,182
That's great.

815
00:50:12,189 --> 00:50:15,356
So, don't give up hope.
You'll be a reporter someday.

816
00:50:15,943 --> 00:50:17,521
If you really want to.

817
00:50:18,988 --> 00:50:20,612
That would be nice.

818
00:50:23,701 --> 00:50:25,824
-Jeesum Crow, a fire!
-A fire?

819
00:50:26,328 --> 00:50:28,202
-We should help.
-We should?

820
00:50:28,289 --> 00:50:30,281
-Let's get going.
-To the fire?

821
00:50:30,833 --> 00:50:34,498
-Fifi, get over here right now.
-Come on, we'll catch you.

822
00:50:34,837 --> 00:50:38,372
Go away! I can't leave without my kitties.
They're all I got.

823
00:50:39,466 --> 00:50:40,332
Crazy lady!

824
00:50:40,426 --> 00:50:43,462
-Oh, babies, where are you?
-Up there now, get going!

825
00:50:43,762 --> 00:50:48,424
Longfellow Deeds, Mandrake Falls
volunteer fire chief. I'll be up there in a jiff.

826
00:50:48,517 --> 00:50:51,553
-He's crazy!
-He's going up there right now, though.

827
00:50:51,687 --> 00:50:53,763
-Look at him.
-Where's he going?

828
00:50:54,815 --> 00:50:56,013
Watch it, man!

829
00:50:56,317 --> 00:50:58,808
-Sully, who's that guy up there?
-I don't know.

830
00:50:58,903 --> 00:51:01,987
He says he's from
the Mandrake Falls Fire Department.

831
00:51:02,698 --> 00:51:06,281
-How's he climb like that?
-He must have monkey blood in him.

832
00:51:06,368 --> 00:51:09,038
It's an honour to work
with New York's bravest, guys.

833
00:51:09,121 --> 00:51:10,450
Be careful!

834
00:51:10,539 --> 00:51:13,955
-I'll get you.
-Babies, where are you?

835
00:51:14,043 --> 00:51:16,284
-Ma'am!
-Lord, it's hot in here.

836
00:51:16,503 --> 00:51:19,837
-Kitties, come to Mommy.
-Calm down. Everything will be all right.

837
00:51:19,924 --> 00:51:22,165
Okay, but I'm not leaving without my kitties.

838
00:51:22,259 --> 00:51:24,051
-How many do you got?
-Seven.

839
00:51:24,136 --> 00:51:26,176
Holy shit! Let's get cracking.

840
00:51:27,890 --> 00:51:30,760
-I apologize for the language.
-Apology accepted.

841
00:51:35,481 --> 00:51:38,150
-Fire excites me.
-Knock yourself out.

842
00:51:40,069 --> 00:51:42,357
-Come here.
-That's Freddy.

843
00:51:43,197 --> 00:51:46,198
-Here we go!
-Oh, my children!

844
00:51:52,331 --> 00:51:55,202
-Nice catch, Pam!
-Good throw, Deeds!

845
00:52:06,428 --> 00:52:09,928
-That's Frobo. Thank you, darling.
-Coming at you, boys.

846
00:52:13,894 --> 00:52:15,223
I'll take that.

847
00:52:16,021 --> 00:52:18,263
-There's a lot more.
-Okay, okay.

848
00:52:30,494 --> 00:52:32,238
Holy shit, it's a cat!

849
00:52:35,958 --> 00:52:38,116
Full snap. I got you, kitty.

850
00:52:40,713 --> 00:52:42,041
Nice grab!

851
00:52:43,507 --> 00:52:44,788
One more to go.

852
00:52:45,259 --> 00:52:47,382
Fifi, where are you?

853
00:52:48,637 --> 00:52:51,638
-I think I found Fifi.
-Oh, good!

854
00:52:52,474 --> 00:52:54,348
Hang in there, buddy!

855
00:52:55,853 --> 00:52:57,098
I got it!

856
00:53:04,904 --> 00:53:06,813
Okay, let's do this together.

857
00:53:08,073 --> 00:53:09,568
Be careful!

858
00:53:09,658 --> 00:53:12,529
All right, they do it all the time. Here we go.

859
00:53:15,748 --> 00:53:16,827
Oh, shit!

860
00:53:20,377 --> 00:53:21,373
Deeds.

861
00:53:21,921 --> 00:53:23,249
I'm okay.

862
00:53:23,798 --> 00:53:25,042
Are you okay?

863
00:53:26,217 --> 00:53:28,542
Yes, I am. Thanks to you!

864
00:53:30,971 --> 00:53:32,430
You're hurting me!

865
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:38,767
Longfellow Deeds is at it again.

866
00:53:39,438 --> 00:53:41,561
His latest victim, Coretta Keeling...

867
00:53:41,648 --> 00:53:44,436
...whose only crime
was loving her cats too much.

868
00:53:44,526 --> 00:53:46,768
And letting Deeds find out about it.

869
00:53:47,071 --> 00:53:49,396
-I'll get you!
-Go away!

870
00:53:50,199 --> 00:53:52,191
-I love it.
-Here comes two!

871
00:53:55,037 --> 00:53:58,287
-Cat killer!
-After he finished with her cats...

872
00:53:58,374 --> 00:54:01,244
...he turned his sights
on Miss Keeling herself.

873
00:54:03,587 --> 00:54:04,832
My God!

874
00:54:05,381 --> 00:54:06,709
That's not what I shot.

875
00:54:06,799 --> 00:54:09,504
Has Longfellow Deeds been locked up?
Of course not.

876
00:54:09,593 --> 00:54:14,089
While the rest of us obey the law,
rich playboys like himself get to laugh at it.

877
00:54:15,724 --> 00:54:19,140
Longfellow Deeds. Our jackass of the week.

878
00:54:20,062 --> 00:54:22,351
What the hell? Who edited that?

879
00:54:22,690 --> 00:54:27,019
I did. Your first cut was great,
but I needed to spice it up a bit.

880
00:54:27,319 --> 00:54:29,229
The truth was a great story.

881
00:54:29,613 --> 00:54:32,614
He saved that woman and her seven cats.

882
00:54:32,699 --> 00:54:35,404
-He was heroic!
-Heroic is nice.

883
00:54:35,703 --> 00:54:38,241
-Depraved and insane is better.
-Hell, yeah!

884
00:54:38,330 --> 00:54:42,114
This footage you're getting, gorgeous.
Keep it coming!

885
00:54:43,210 --> 00:54:45,748
God, how can we do this
to such a sweet guy?

886
00:54:45,838 --> 00:54:47,877
Sweet? Sweet?

887
00:54:48,591 --> 00:54:50,049
Look at me!

888
00:54:50,134 --> 00:54:53,668
Was he sweet when he gave me
the most savage beating of my life?

889
00:54:53,762 --> 00:54:56,051
-You were mugging me!
-Babe!

890
00:54:56,891 --> 00:55:00,224
No one is as good
as this guy's pretending to be.

891
00:55:00,853 --> 00:55:02,395
Don't be a sucker.

892
00:55:03,063 --> 00:55:04,771
He doesn't deserve this.

893
00:55:06,942 --> 00:55:08,602
He doesn't deserve you.

894
00:55:10,237 --> 00:55:11,566
My neck!

895
00:55:16,243 --> 00:55:20,407
I feel like an idiot.
They made me look like a fool, Jan.

896
00:55:21,082 --> 00:55:24,450
I was thinking of going down
to that Inside Access place...

897
00:55:24,585 --> 00:55:27,586
...and giving Mac McGrath
the beating of a lifetime.

898
00:55:27,963 --> 00:55:31,249
That sounds like fun,
but don't stoop to their level.

899
00:55:31,759 --> 00:55:33,835
You're better than that, Deedsy.

900
00:55:34,011 --> 00:55:37,546
So hang in there.
And know that we are always here for you.

901
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:42,934
Thanks, Jan.
My uncle really built an amazing company.

902
00:55:43,520 --> 00:55:46,770
Because of him, 50, 000 people have jobs.

903
00:55:47,274 --> 00:55:49,848
And he always tried to do the right thing.

904
00:55:50,861 --> 00:55:53,103
Well, he does sound amazing.

905
00:55:53,656 --> 00:55:56,906
But don't forget, he was related to you.

906
00:55:57,326 --> 00:56:01,739
Enough about that.
Tell me more about this girl.

907
00:56:02,998 --> 00:56:06,616
She's nice, a small-town kid, like me.

908
00:56:07,461 --> 00:56:10,379
Deedsy, you sick ass mo' fo'...

909
00:56:10,464 --> 00:56:13,964
You got to tap that
before she starts boning other guys, kid.

910
00:56:14,593 --> 00:56:15,625
Boo-Yah!

911
00:56:17,554 --> 00:56:20,923
He thinks it's you! He thinks it's you!

912
00:56:22,309 --> 00:56:26,437
-Let's go, Cedar. Put some steam on it, kid.
-Here it comes.

913
00:56:29,149 --> 00:56:31,901
He's trying to kill me. You're good at this.

914
00:56:31,986 --> 00:56:35,236
When you asked me to play,
I thought you'd done this before.

915
00:56:35,322 --> 00:56:38,074
No, Johnny McEnroe said
it was wicked easy.

916
00:56:38,325 --> 00:56:40,532
Plus, it was my uncle's
favourite game, right?

917
00:56:40,619 --> 00:56:43,324
-How'd you know that?
-I read it in his diary.

918
00:56:44,165 --> 00:56:45,160
Really?

919
00:56:46,166 --> 00:56:48,159
I didn't know he kept a diary.

920
00:56:52,381 --> 00:56:54,089
Sorry about that, dude.

921
00:56:54,216 --> 00:56:56,292
It's okay. He's a new member.

922
00:56:57,094 --> 00:56:58,173
Ball boy.

923
00:56:59,221 --> 00:57:00,301
Ball boy!

924
00:57:02,641 --> 00:57:04,848
All right, baby, I'm ready for you.

925
00:57:09,273 --> 00:57:10,436
You okay?

926
00:57:10,691 --> 00:57:13,478
-Not a problem.
-Anderson, you liked that, didn't you?

927
00:57:13,569 --> 00:57:14,731
I did.

928
00:57:14,945 --> 00:57:17,317
Listen, Deeds, I got some good news.

929
00:57:17,406 --> 00:57:19,564
Those papers will be ready
to sign tomorrow.

930
00:57:19,658 --> 00:57:23,110
So you can relax knowing
your uncle's company'll be in good hands...

931
00:57:23,203 --> 00:57:25,362
...and you can go home $40 billion richer.

932
00:57:25,456 --> 00:57:28,029
I was thinking about
maybe sticking around here...

933
00:57:28,125 --> 00:57:30,877
-...and going to some meetings with you.
-What?

934
00:57:33,005 --> 00:57:34,168
Fault!

935
00:57:34,298 --> 00:57:37,168
I figured I could learn, like this tennis thing.

936
00:57:40,638 --> 00:57:43,307
I swear to God, I'm not trying to do that.

937
00:57:44,809 --> 00:57:47,644
I don't got to sell my shares right away,
do I?

938
00:57:48,062 --> 00:57:51,894
Plus, I met this girl, Cedar.
I swear to God, I think she's the one.

939
00:57:53,150 --> 00:57:54,894
That's wonderful for you.

940
00:57:57,822 --> 00:58:00,194
That got you right in the throat, huh?

941
00:58:01,450 --> 00:58:04,736
Got to ask you, though, if it hits you,
is it my point or yours?

942
00:58:04,829 --> 00:58:07,154
-Yours.
-I'm winning then, I guess.

943
00:58:13,128 --> 00:58:16,332
"Deeds info, meet in shower"?

944
00:58:21,637 --> 00:58:23,012
Sweet Jesus!

945
00:58:23,722 --> 00:58:27,056
Who are you?
And what do you want to tell me?

946
00:58:27,601 --> 00:58:30,009
I'm a junior producer at Inside Access.

947
00:58:30,437 --> 00:58:34,518
I have information that will help you
get Deeds out of town. Interested?

948
00:58:34,900 --> 00:58:39,527
Very. Provided the information is good
and you stop soaping your ass.

949
00:58:43,534 --> 00:58:46,286
-You know Deeds' girlfriend?
-The school nurse.

950
00:58:46,870 --> 00:58:48,199
Not quite.

951
00:58:50,499 --> 00:58:54,164
Lucy, bring me the overnights.
J.D. will tell you where they are.

952
00:58:54,336 --> 00:58:57,088
Hey. What the hell are you doing
in my chair?

953
00:58:57,631 --> 00:58:58,829
Chuck Cedar.

954
00:58:59,508 --> 00:59:02,177
I think you and I could help each other out.

955
00:59:06,390 --> 00:59:09,723
-You excited about this trip?
-I'm so excited.

956
00:59:10,394 --> 00:59:13,680
-Where are you taking me?
-I told you, that's a surprise.

957
00:59:20,529 --> 00:59:21,560
Well?

958
00:59:23,574 --> 00:59:26,243
"Winchestertonfieldville, lowa."

959
00:59:27,244 --> 00:59:29,071
You got to be shitting me.

960
00:59:29,705 --> 00:59:31,698
I never heard you curse before.

961
00:59:31,791 --> 00:59:33,333
I'm that excited!

962
00:59:37,129 --> 00:59:41,791
All you Winchestertonfieldvillians,
recognize this little girl?

963
00:59:44,595 --> 00:59:47,798
I'll give you a hint.
"I fell out of Boo Radley's apple tree...

964
00:59:47,890 --> 00:59:49,883
"...and my arm is killing me!"

965
00:59:53,937 --> 00:59:56,096
Come on, it's little Pammy Dawson!

966
00:59:58,108 --> 00:59:59,140
Hello.

967
01:00:00,069 --> 01:00:01,895
You related to Bill Dawson?

968
01:00:02,196 --> 01:00:04,947
Yes, he's my relative.

969
01:00:05,783 --> 01:00:07,491
I think I remember you.

970
01:00:08,202 --> 01:00:10,693
Did you used to have a hump on your back?

971
01:00:11,622 --> 01:00:15,620
-Yes, that was me. I had a slight hump.
-Really?

972
01:00:15,709 --> 01:00:17,417
This was no slight hump.

973
01:00:17,628 --> 01:00:21,839
The girl I'm thinking of looked like
she had a damn beach ball on her back.

974
01:00:22,216 --> 01:00:25,916
Okay, it was a huge hump
and I'm a little sensitive about it.

975
01:00:26,136 --> 01:00:29,256
Look, Martha,
it's Quasimodo, all growed up.

976
01:00:29,515 --> 01:00:32,681
How wonderful! I thought you died.

977
01:00:33,936 --> 01:00:36,142
She actually became a school nurse.

978
01:00:36,272 --> 01:00:37,814
-You're a nurse?
-Yes.

979
01:00:38,107 --> 01:00:40,016
What should I do about this?

980
01:00:47,199 --> 01:00:49,524
-I would call Dr. Pepper.
-Who?

981
01:00:49,910 --> 01:00:53,990
It was so great seeing everybody again.
We're going to leave now.

982
01:00:54,331 --> 01:00:55,245
'Bye.

983
01:00:57,000 --> 01:00:58,329
-Hi, mailman.
-'Morning.

984
01:00:58,419 --> 01:00:59,747
How you doing?

985
01:01:03,257 --> 01:01:04,965
Oh, my God, there it is.

986
01:01:05,176 --> 01:01:09,422
Blue shutters, red door, tire swing.
That's your house, isn't it?

987
01:01:10,848 --> 01:01:12,425
Wouldn't you know it?

988
01:01:12,975 --> 01:01:14,137
Come on.

989
01:01:16,520 --> 01:01:19,391
How you guys doing?
You know who she is?

990
01:01:20,774 --> 01:01:23,811
She used to live in this house
when she was a little girl.

991
01:01:23,903 --> 01:01:24,851
It's true.

992
01:01:24,945 --> 01:01:28,777
You live here and she used to live here.
You're practically cousins.

993
01:01:31,285 --> 01:01:33,076
So many memories.

994
01:01:34,872 --> 01:01:36,247
Where to begin?

995
01:01:37,082 --> 01:01:39,490
This is our fireplace...

996
01:01:40,044 --> 01:01:42,582
...where my dad would build fires...

997
01:01:43,339 --> 01:01:44,370
...out of wood.

998
01:01:44,465 --> 01:01:48,213
And this is the dining room,
where we would have our meals...

999
01:01:48,302 --> 01:01:49,677
...made of food.

1000
01:01:50,054 --> 01:01:52,461
And this was my brother's room.

1001
01:01:53,307 --> 01:01:55,216
My parents hated my brother.

1002
01:01:55,476 --> 01:01:59,010
My daddy built this house
with his bare hands six years ago.

1003
01:02:00,022 --> 01:02:01,730
Your daddy is a liar.

1004
01:02:02,733 --> 01:02:04,061
How come you...

1005
01:02:07,321 --> 01:02:10,156
He's choking. We should go.

1006
01:02:10,240 --> 01:02:12,150
-Help.
-What are you talking about?

1007
01:02:12,243 --> 01:02:14,615
-You're the nurse, help him.
-Save him!

1008
01:02:14,745 --> 01:02:17,117
-Stand back, kids.
-He's gonna die!

1009
01:02:17,707 --> 01:02:20,197
-Take him to the hospital!
-Smack it out!

1010
01:02:20,375 --> 01:02:22,701
-Save him!
-Get it out of him!

1011
01:02:23,087 --> 01:02:24,498
Save him, please!

1012
01:02:29,969 --> 01:02:32,257
-That was amazing.
-Thank you.

1013
01:02:32,930 --> 01:02:34,341
I saved his life.

1014
01:02:35,307 --> 01:02:37,217
You're my hero, Nurse Dawson.

1015
01:02:42,398 --> 01:02:43,975
Thank you, thank you.

1016
01:02:45,234 --> 01:02:47,642
-Good parking job, buddy.
-Thanks, Deeds.

1017
01:02:48,070 --> 01:02:49,612
Testing, testing.

1018
01:02:50,031 --> 01:02:52,106
I had such a wonderful time.

1019
01:02:52,449 --> 01:02:54,905
Thank you for such a great day.

1020
01:02:56,579 --> 01:03:00,623
-Thanks for showing me your town.
-I hope sometime to see your hometown.

1021
01:03:01,250 --> 01:03:03,871
Maybe someday this will be
my new hometown.

1022
01:03:05,129 --> 01:03:06,125
Deeds.

1023
01:03:07,047 --> 01:03:10,381
-There's something I have to tell you.
-What's the matter?

1024
01:03:12,344 --> 01:03:13,258
What?

1025
01:03:14,680 --> 01:03:17,930
Go back to New Hampshire
and enjoy being rich.

1026
01:03:18,684 --> 01:03:19,799
Just...

1027
01:03:20,394 --> 01:03:23,015
...don't let anyone hurt you anymore, okay?

1028
01:03:24,565 --> 01:03:25,728
Sucker.

1029
01:03:28,736 --> 01:03:29,731
Pam.

1030
01:03:31,822 --> 01:03:33,400
I made a card for you.

1031
01:03:34,158 --> 01:03:35,486
It's kind of dumb.

1032
01:03:35,576 --> 01:03:39,408
I never worked on anything harder, though,
so don't laugh at me.

1033
01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:43,744
Remember we went to the restaurant
that first night...

1034
01:03:43,834 --> 01:03:45,743
...and you ordered chicken parmesan?

1035
01:03:45,836 --> 01:03:47,496
So I drew you a plate.

1036
01:03:48,297 --> 01:03:50,788
There's the chicken and the cheese...

1037
01:03:51,467 --> 01:03:55,251
...and the linguini. That took me
a long time with the squigglies.

1038
01:03:56,305 --> 01:03:57,585
It's beautiful.

1039
01:03:57,932 --> 01:04:00,008
There's a poem inside for you.

1040
01:04:04,813 --> 01:04:07,565
"Hard to breathe, feels like floating

1041
01:04:08,567 --> 01:04:11,651
"So full of love my heart's exploding

1042
01:04:13,822 --> 01:04:16,148
"Mouth is dry, hands are shaking

1043
01:04:17,493 --> 01:04:19,651
"My heart is yours for the taking

1044
01:04:21,539 --> 01:04:24,076
"Acting weird, not myself

1045
01:04:26,126 --> 01:04:29,376
"Dancing around like the Keebler elf"

1046
01:04:30,131 --> 01:04:31,459
That was funny.

1047
01:04:33,509 --> 01:04:36,296
"Finally time for this poor schlub

1048
01:04:37,012 --> 01:04:39,847
"To know how it feels to fall in lub"

1049
01:04:41,016 --> 01:04:44,183
I couldn't think of anything else
that rhymes with "schlub."

1050
01:04:44,270 --> 01:04:46,179
"Rub" and "tub" didn't work.

1051
01:04:55,948 --> 01:04:57,442
I'm sorry, Deeds.

1052
01:04:59,869 --> 01:05:04,329
-I'm really sorry.
-Don't be sorry, that was unbelievable.

1053
01:05:08,460 --> 01:05:11,995
Hi, Mrs. Finch... Atticus.

1054
01:05:13,382 --> 01:05:14,710
Sleep well.

1055
01:05:18,929 --> 01:05:21,764
-Al, I'm gonna walk home.
-Okay, Deeds.

1056
01:05:31,567 --> 01:05:33,559
I love New York!

1057
01:05:33,944 --> 01:05:35,487
Nobody cares!

1058
01:05:43,120 --> 01:05:44,698
I'm in love with him.

1059
01:05:45,956 --> 01:05:49,041
I'm going to see him tonight
and tell him everything.

1060
01:05:50,961 --> 01:05:54,247
-He'll probably punch you in the face.
-I kind of hope he does.

1061
01:05:54,340 --> 01:05:56,665
Come on, Babe, snap out of it.

1062
01:05:56,759 --> 01:06:00,210
You really want to throw all this away
for a dipshit like that?

1063
01:06:00,304 --> 01:06:04,882
He's not a dipshit. He's a good-hearted guy
who we think is a weirdo...

1064
01:06:04,975 --> 01:06:08,807
...because he doesn't share
our sense of ironic detachment.

1065
01:06:09,229 --> 01:06:13,062
-All this hip, snide, smart-alecky...
-Bullshit?

1066
01:06:13,150 --> 01:06:14,609
Yes, bullshit.

1067
01:06:15,235 --> 01:06:19,530
Well, in a few moments,
I'll put on my Versace overcoat...

1068
01:06:19,615 --> 01:06:23,315
...get into my Mercedes,
drive to my Fifth Avenue apartment...

1069
01:06:23,410 --> 01:06:26,660
...and squeeze my girlfriend's
big, fake boobs.

1070
01:06:27,331 --> 01:06:31,163
And that bullshit you're talking about
paid for all of it.

1071
01:06:31,835 --> 01:06:34,920
Good for you, Mac. But I'm still telling him.

1072
01:06:35,339 --> 01:06:36,370
Well...

1073
01:06:38,134 --> 01:06:40,007
Babe Bennett falls in love.

1074
01:06:41,470 --> 01:06:43,961
I'm happy for you. I am.

1075
01:06:45,266 --> 01:06:46,843
Gonna miss you, Babe.

1076
01:06:47,685 --> 01:06:49,095
Something fierce.

1077
01:07:18,382 --> 01:07:20,209
You think she'll like this?

1078
01:07:20,718 --> 01:07:21,832
All right.

1079
01:07:21,969 --> 01:07:25,219
Chicken parmesan? Terrific, thank you.

1080
01:07:25,973 --> 01:07:27,218
Let's hear it.

1081
01:07:30,519 --> 01:07:33,141
-She gonna like that, Mr. Deeds.
-Okay.

1082
01:07:33,981 --> 01:07:36,389
-Emilio, it looks beautiful.
-Thank you.

1083
01:07:40,112 --> 01:07:43,446
These roses might be a little too high.
I won't be able to see her.

1084
01:07:43,532 --> 01:07:45,655
-Do we have anything smaller?
-Yes, sir.

1085
01:07:45,743 --> 01:07:46,739
Okay.

1086
01:07:47,661 --> 01:07:48,657
Byron?

1087
01:07:49,413 --> 01:07:50,788
That's terrific.

1088
01:07:51,248 --> 01:07:54,083
-Would you mind sitting for a second?
-Yes, sir.

1089
01:07:56,420 --> 01:07:58,626
Say something to me. Pretend you're her.

1090
01:07:58,714 --> 01:08:00,753
-Me, sir?
-Please.

1091
01:08:01,759 --> 01:08:02,754
Well...

1092
01:08:03,969 --> 01:08:07,801
...it's nice of you to have invited me
to dine with you this evening.

1093
01:08:07,890 --> 01:08:09,384
It's my pleasure.

1094
01:08:09,516 --> 01:08:12,352
Actually, you're too tall.
Can you slink down?

1095
01:08:14,188 --> 01:08:15,848
-Like this?
-That's good.

1096
01:08:16,607 --> 01:08:20,106
This is one of the best dates
I've ever been on.

1097
01:08:21,111 --> 01:08:23,104
You make me feel very special.

1098
01:08:23,989 --> 01:08:26,196
You make me feel very special, too.

1099
01:08:26,867 --> 01:08:28,860
That's why I got this for you.

1100
01:08:29,704 --> 01:08:31,197
Okay, lean forward.

1101
01:08:36,126 --> 01:08:39,293
-I really like you a lot.
-I like you, too.

1102
01:08:39,588 --> 01:08:43,289
-I can't stop thinking about you.
-I can't stop thinking about you.

1103
01:08:43,384 --> 01:08:45,376
Please let me touch your feet.

1104
01:08:45,928 --> 01:08:48,845
Okay, this is getting weird.
You can stand up now.

1105
01:08:52,017 --> 01:08:53,975
-Deeds!
-Fellows!

1106
01:08:54,478 --> 01:08:57,313
We wanted to come and wish you
the best on your big night.

1107
01:08:57,397 --> 01:09:01,478
Thanks a lot. I'm so nervous.
I never asked anybody to marry me before.

1108
01:09:01,652 --> 01:09:04,190
It's 7:30, time for Inside Access.

1109
01:09:04,280 --> 01:09:07,067
We're not in for any more
nasty surprises, are we?

1110
01:09:07,158 --> 01:09:10,906
I don't think so. I haven't done
anything stupid all day. I've been here.

1111
01:09:10,995 --> 01:09:15,123
Let's see what lame show they put on
when they don't have Deeds to pick on.

1112
01:09:15,207 --> 01:09:16,618
Excuse me!

1113
01:09:17,584 --> 01:09:21,167
-Could you put on Channel 8, please?
-You got it.

1114
01:09:23,716 --> 01:09:26,385
Welcome to Inside Access.
I'm Mac McGrath.

1115
01:09:27,136 --> 01:09:31,003
All of us here at I.A. take pride
in our ability to handle...

1116
01:09:31,098 --> 01:09:33,671
...every story with sensitivity and empathy...

1117
01:09:33,768 --> 01:09:34,514
Okay, pal.

1118
01:09:34,602 --> 01:09:37,472
...while maintaining
an appropriate journalistic distance.

1119
01:09:37,563 --> 01:09:42,106
But what happens when a reporter
becomes part of what she's reporting?

1120
01:09:42,192 --> 01:09:46,060
What happens when a journalist
falls in love with an idiot?

1121
01:09:47,281 --> 01:09:49,320
That's Longfellow Deeds with Pam Dawson.

1122
01:09:49,617 --> 01:09:52,534
-I can't believe they involved her in this.
-A school nurse...

1123
01:09:52,620 --> 01:09:56,238
...who recently moved to New York City
from Winchestertonfieldville, lowa.

1124
01:09:56,332 --> 01:10:00,199
But wait. Doesn't Pam Dawson
bear a striking resemblance to...

1125
01:10:00,460 --> 01:10:03,711
...Babe Bennett,
a producer here at Inside Access?

1126
01:10:04,048 --> 01:10:06,717
In fact, the two are one and the same.

1127
01:10:06,800 --> 01:10:10,584
We'll wire your apartment
with state-of-the-art surveillance video.

1128
01:10:11,097 --> 01:10:12,377
Sounds good.

1129
01:10:13,391 --> 01:10:14,386
Deeds.

1130
01:10:21,398 --> 01:10:24,399
I came here to try to explain.

1131
01:10:53,681 --> 01:10:55,922
I'm the biggest sucker in the world.

1132
01:10:56,767 --> 01:10:58,427
This town can be brutal.

1133
01:10:58,978 --> 01:11:00,520
I don't belong here.

1134
01:11:00,646 --> 01:11:03,600
I can't run the company,
I can't even run my own life.

1135
01:11:03,691 --> 01:11:06,264
Sure you can.
The good news is the papers are ready.

1136
01:11:06,360 --> 01:11:09,942
Once you sign them, we'll get our stock
and you'll get your $40 billion.

1137
01:11:10,030 --> 01:11:13,115
I don't want that money.
Just give it to a charity.

1138
01:11:13,200 --> 01:11:16,949
-What's a good charity?
-The United Negro College Fund?

1139
01:11:17,288 --> 01:11:19,197
Okay, give it to those guys.

1140
01:11:24,670 --> 01:11:28,584
Can we give you a ride to the airport?
The company chopper will take you home.

1141
01:11:28,674 --> 01:11:31,379
Thanks, anyway. I'll be all right on my own.

1142
01:11:32,219 --> 01:11:35,054
-Nice meeting you all.
-Nice meeting you, Deeds.

1143
01:11:38,684 --> 01:11:39,763
Goodbye!

1144
01:11:41,645 --> 01:11:42,676
Goodbye.

1145
01:12:27,566 --> 01:12:28,846
It's not right.

1146
01:12:29,401 --> 01:12:30,682
It's not right.

1147
01:12:57,846 --> 01:12:59,922
You must be Jan. My name is...

1148
01:13:00,015 --> 01:13:03,219
I know who you are. Wham-bam Dawson.

1149
01:13:04,353 --> 01:13:06,393
A.k.a. Little Miss Slut-Slut.

1150
01:13:07,690 --> 01:13:09,766
Okay, I deserve that.

1151
01:13:09,858 --> 01:13:12,101
Do you have any idea
how much you hurt him?

1152
01:13:12,194 --> 01:13:14,401
You're not getting anywhere near that boy.

1153
01:13:14,488 --> 01:13:18,356
I have to find him and there's nothing
you can do to stop me.

1154
01:13:19,952 --> 01:13:24,164
-There's a lot I can do to stop you.
-He needs to know how bad I feel.

1155
01:13:24,707 --> 01:13:27,198
And that I would go to the end of the earth...

1156
01:13:27,292 --> 01:13:31,160
...I would do anything
to take back what I did to him.

1157
01:13:31,255 --> 01:13:35,003
I'm sorry, all I heard was,
"Blah, blah, I'm a dirty tramp."

1158
01:13:36,677 --> 01:13:38,884
Tell you what. You get by me...

1159
01:13:40,973 --> 01:13:42,930
...l'll tell you where he is.

1160
01:13:49,022 --> 01:13:50,351
Feeling crazy!

1161
01:13:53,110 --> 01:13:54,438
Come to Mama.

1162
01:14:00,868 --> 01:14:05,495
I was a rodeo clown for six years.
You'll have to step it up a notch, shorty.

1163
01:14:05,581 --> 01:14:07,123
You mean like this?

1164
01:14:11,545 --> 01:14:14,795
Where were you kicking?
I ain't got no balls, dummy!

1165
01:14:15,632 --> 01:14:16,628
Get up!

1166
01:14:17,760 --> 01:14:19,836
-Put me down!
-You got it!

1167
01:14:24,267 --> 01:14:27,766
-Just tell me where Deeds is.
-Bring your bony ass over here.

1168
01:14:28,770 --> 01:14:32,471
I want to cut you into
eight slices of bitch-eroni.

1169
01:14:46,539 --> 01:14:47,997
Are you all right?

1170
01:14:48,916 --> 01:14:51,205
Good kick, honey. Good kick.

1171
01:14:55,047 --> 01:14:56,245
Crazy Eyes!

1172
01:15:03,806 --> 01:15:05,514
-All right.
-Here you go.

1173
01:15:06,141 --> 01:15:08,549
Peanut butter and gumballs. Nice combo.

1174
01:15:08,644 --> 01:15:11,811
Don't worry about what happened.
Time heals all things.

1175
01:15:12,940 --> 01:15:14,648
Except these crazy eyes.

1176
01:15:15,150 --> 01:15:17,642
It's good to be home. I know that much.

1177
01:15:18,070 --> 01:15:22,233
I wasn't talking to you, Deeds.
I was talking to that squirrel over there.

1178
01:15:24,201 --> 01:15:26,573
Although it's a shame
about that Cedar fellow...

1179
01:15:26,662 --> 01:15:30,161
...tearing apart your uncle's company
and firing all those nice people.

1180
01:15:30,249 --> 01:15:31,280
Where'd you hear that?

1181
01:15:31,375 --> 01:15:33,948
I watch the stock market channel
all the time.

1182
01:15:34,044 --> 01:15:38,125
I watch because I suspect that anchorman
of being an evil leprechaun.

1183
01:15:38,215 --> 01:15:40,676
He can bullshit everybody else,
but he ain't fooling me.

1184
01:15:40,676 --> 01:15:41,423
He can bullshit everybody else,
but he ain't fooling me.

1185
01:15:45,431 --> 01:15:46,759
There it is.

1186
01:15:56,275 --> 01:15:57,270
Someone!

1187
01:15:57,693 --> 01:15:58,772
Help!

1188
01:16:04,575 --> 01:16:06,449
Deeds! Help!

1189
01:16:07,995 --> 01:16:10,118
Deeds! Help!

1190
01:16:10,206 --> 01:16:11,914
Oh, God! Deeds!

1191
01:16:23,135 --> 01:16:24,463
Oh, my God!

1192
01:16:33,604 --> 01:16:36,142
Where do you got the camera hidden,
in the woods?

1193
01:16:36,232 --> 01:16:37,394
No camera.

1194
01:16:37,483 --> 01:16:39,974
I'm so cold. Please!

1195
01:16:40,235 --> 01:16:42,359
You gonna get mugged in there, too?

1196
01:16:42,446 --> 01:16:43,644
I'm so...

1197
01:16:44,656 --> 01:16:45,736
...sorry.

1198
01:16:45,824 --> 01:16:48,825
I really love you.

1199
01:16:49,870 --> 01:16:51,199
Bullshit!

1200
01:17:16,897 --> 01:17:18,060
I'm coming!

1201
01:17:20,526 --> 01:17:23,195
Go down! Go down!

1202
01:17:23,278 --> 01:17:25,187
Here comes the black foot.

1203
01:17:27,199 --> 01:17:28,195
No!

1204
01:17:31,912 --> 01:17:34,201
I know it's gross, but grab it.

1205
01:17:38,794 --> 01:17:40,917
I got you. I got you.

1206
01:17:41,088 --> 01:17:45,797
-Oh, God, your foot is disgusting!
-I know, I know. Come here.

1207
01:17:46,427 --> 01:17:49,048
Come on, you okay? You okay?

1208
01:17:49,597 --> 01:17:50,841
I think so.

1209
01:17:54,518 --> 01:17:57,602
You didn't really fall out of an apple tree,
did you?

1210
01:17:59,356 --> 01:18:00,352
No.

1211
01:18:02,985 --> 01:18:04,609
But I really love you.

1212
01:18:06,613 --> 01:18:08,736
I don't even know who you are.

1213
01:18:09,825 --> 01:18:11,105
I'm sorry.

1214
01:18:37,687 --> 01:18:39,513
I am so sorry.

1215
01:18:47,530 --> 01:18:51,942
A company in tatters. Preston Blake's
great legacy gone to the highest bidder.

1216
01:18:52,034 --> 01:18:55,984
The shocking announcement from Chuck
Cedar today confirmed that Blake Media...

1217
01:18:56,080 --> 01:18:58,950
...will be stripped down
and sold off piece by piece.

1218
01:18:59,041 --> 01:19:02,457
The only man who could stand up
to Mr. Cedar and save the company...

1219
01:19:02,544 --> 01:19:07,087
...Longfellow Deeds, has apparently
given up his voting rights and left the city.

1220
01:19:07,591 --> 01:19:10,260
The sale's expected to pass
with unanimous consent...

1221
01:19:10,344 --> 01:19:14,556
...at the annual stockholders' meeting
here in New York tomorrow afternoon.

1222
01:19:14,724 --> 01:19:18,306
Sources indicate that virtually
all of Blake's 50, 000 employees...

1223
01:19:18,394 --> 01:19:20,850
...are likely to lose their jobs.

1224
01:19:20,938 --> 01:19:23,263
Wait a minute. I'm a Blake employee.

1225
01:19:23,732 --> 01:19:26,520
Holy shit! This sucks.

1226
01:19:27,611 --> 01:19:31,395
Ladies and gentlemen,
the bottom line is that this divestiture...

1227
01:19:31,490 --> 01:19:36,484
...will result in every shareholder,
all of you and myself included...

1228
01:19:36,912 --> 01:19:39,866
...getting a substantial premium
for our shares.

1229
01:19:41,708 --> 01:19:45,327
But before we vote, the company bylaws
require me to open the floor...

1230
01:19:45,421 --> 01:19:49,501
...to shareholders for statements
either for or against this buyout plan.

1231
01:19:49,592 --> 01:19:51,917
Does anyone wish to make a statement?

1232
01:19:52,178 --> 01:19:55,760
Dismantling this company
would be an insult to a great man.

1233
01:19:56,599 --> 01:19:57,844
You scared me.

1234
01:19:58,100 --> 01:20:02,264
It is an unspeakable outrage
and it cannot be allowed to happen.

1235
01:20:06,108 --> 01:20:08,266
Excuse me. I got a statement.

1236
01:20:11,072 --> 01:20:12,614
Longfellow Deeds.

1237
01:20:12,698 --> 01:20:15,616
Unfortunately, since you sold me
your 300 million shares...

1238
01:20:15,701 --> 01:20:19,201
-...you've no right to speak at this meeting.
-Unfortunately for you...

1239
01:20:19,288 --> 01:20:22,040
...I bought one share of Blake Media
this morning.

1240
01:20:22,124 --> 01:20:25,160
You told me every stockholder
has a say in this company.

1241
01:20:25,252 --> 01:20:26,794
Even the little guy.

1242
01:20:29,131 --> 01:20:33,544
You have two minutes, but remember,
I control 49 percent of this company.

1243
01:20:33,635 --> 01:20:36,720
You're gonna have to persuade
just about everyone else...

1244
01:20:36,805 --> 01:20:38,549
...to start hating money.

1245
01:20:46,106 --> 01:20:48,313
Hello, everybody. I'm Deeds.

1246
01:20:49,192 --> 01:20:52,312
For a little while,
I was a big part of this company.

1247
01:20:52,905 --> 01:20:55,146
I was wicked rich and powerful.

1248
01:20:55,949 --> 01:20:58,654
Now being rich and powerful
isn't a bad thing.

1249
01:20:59,829 --> 01:21:04,075
It looks like the Monopoly guy over there
is pretty darned psyched about it.

1250
01:21:04,791 --> 01:21:07,793
But the problem is
what can happen when you decide...

1251
01:21:07,878 --> 01:21:12,255
...that you would do absolutely anything
to become rich and powerful.

1252
01:21:12,341 --> 01:21:15,176
I don't know who licked the red off
your lollipop today...

1253
01:21:15,260 --> 01:21:17,834
...but you are preaching to the wrong choir.

1254
01:21:17,930 --> 01:21:20,088
All I'm saying is, when you were kids...

1255
01:21:20,182 --> 01:21:23,551
...did you dream
about becoming a savvy investor one day...

1256
01:21:23,644 --> 01:21:26,847
...who would think with his wallet
instead of his heart?

1257
01:21:27,690 --> 01:21:29,517
Come on, I know I didn't.

1258
01:21:30,025 --> 01:21:31,769
I wanted to be a fireman.

1259
01:21:32,569 --> 01:21:36,270
I wanted to be the guy everybody called on
if they were in trouble.

1260
01:21:36,365 --> 01:21:37,943
I wanted to help people...

1261
01:21:38,034 --> 01:21:41,616
...and yeah, I wanted to slide down
those wicked awesome poles.

1262
01:21:42,538 --> 01:21:45,954
But money,
that was the last thing I thought about.

1263
01:21:46,917 --> 01:21:50,001
What about you, sir?
Did you want to be a fireman?

1264
01:21:50,087 --> 01:21:51,416
No, I did not.

1265
01:21:52,965 --> 01:21:55,207
Truth be told, I wanted to be a veterinarian.

1266
01:21:55,301 --> 01:21:57,756
Cool. Why would you want to do that?

1267
01:21:58,637 --> 01:22:01,757
-I wanted to help sick animals.
-And what do you do now?

1268
01:22:01,849 --> 01:22:04,007
I own a chain of slaughterhouses.

1269
01:22:04,268 --> 01:22:07,435
You kind of went the other way
on that one, didn't you?

1270
01:22:08,230 --> 01:22:09,096
Okay.

1271
01:22:09,189 --> 01:22:11,763
In the back. Come on.
Tell me what you wanted to be.

1272
01:22:11,859 --> 01:22:14,065
I wanted to be a magician.

1273
01:22:15,696 --> 01:22:19,741
-And what do you do now?
-I operate a pornographic website.

1274
01:22:20,451 --> 01:22:24,531
That makes people happy also, I guess.
But kind of in a grosser way.

1275
01:22:25,831 --> 01:22:28,156
-Who else?
-I wanted to be a senator.

1276
01:22:28,667 --> 01:22:32,535
-I wanted to be a florist.
-lnternational House Pancake.

1277
01:22:33,046 --> 01:22:34,707
I wanted to be a man.

1278
01:22:36,884 --> 01:22:38,710
That explains a lot.

1279
01:22:39,303 --> 01:22:41,544
I wanted to be a Ping-Pong champion.

1280
01:22:44,391 --> 01:22:47,511
But you're not those things
you wanted to be, are you?

1281
01:22:47,728 --> 01:22:51,512
Everybody made a compromise,
then another compromise, and now...

1282
01:22:51,607 --> 01:22:56,518
...you're about to put 50, 000 people out
of work to make a quick buck? Come on.

1283
01:22:56,821 --> 01:23:00,355
I bet if we ran into the 6th-grade versions
of ourselves right now...

1284
01:23:00,449 --> 01:23:03,485
...they would kick our asses
and put Bubble Yum in our hair...

1285
01:23:03,577 --> 01:23:05,949
...for even thinking about doing this.

1286
01:23:07,915 --> 01:23:10,666
He's right.
I would've beat my greedy ass red.

1287
01:23:10,751 --> 01:23:13,076
I would've thrown myself
off the merry-go-round.

1288
01:23:13,170 --> 01:23:17,631
I would've tied myself naked to a chair
and burned myself with lit cigarettes.

1289
01:23:19,093 --> 01:23:22,010
Did anyone here dream
of becoming a psychiatrist?

1290
01:23:22,137 --> 01:23:23,596
Just kidding, pal.

1291
01:23:24,306 --> 01:23:27,093
There's still hope
for the kids inside of all of us.

1292
01:23:27,184 --> 01:23:29,722
Please don't break up my uncle's company.

1293
01:23:32,022 --> 01:23:33,849
I always wanted to do that.

1294
01:23:44,493 --> 01:23:45,489
Well...

1295
01:23:46,579 --> 01:23:48,080
...that was very touching, Deeds.

1296
01:23:48,080 --> 01:23:48,744
...that was very touching, Deeds.

1297
01:23:49,540 --> 01:23:52,291
It appears this divestiture
has been defeated.

1298
01:23:52,459 --> 01:23:54,535
Unless I'm forgetting something.

1299
01:23:55,796 --> 01:23:57,374
My 300 million votes...

1300
01:23:57,464 --> 01:24:01,378
...plus the 5 million votes I control
as proxy for the foreign investors.

1301
01:24:01,469 --> 01:24:04,006
So which way should I vote my 51 percent?

1302
01:24:05,389 --> 01:24:06,634
I vote aye.

1303
01:24:07,058 --> 01:24:09,264
305 million times.

1304
01:24:10,561 --> 01:24:14,310
The ayes have it.
And Blake Media is no more.

1305
01:24:14,398 --> 01:24:16,189
Not so fast, Chuck.

1306
01:24:17,610 --> 01:24:20,895
Too bad for you, when I was a kid,
I wanted to be a good reporter.

1307
01:24:20,988 --> 01:24:23,740
Miss Bennett,
I wasn't aware you were a stockholder.

1308
01:24:23,824 --> 01:24:25,947
There's a couple things you're not aware of.

1309
01:24:26,034 --> 01:24:28,572
How to tweeze your eyebrows, for instance.

1310
01:24:29,080 --> 01:24:33,623
Also, when Deeds gave away his fortune,
he gave away something that wasn't his.

1311
01:24:35,043 --> 01:24:39,504
-What are you talking about?
-I have here the diary of Preston Blake.

1312
01:24:42,384 --> 01:24:43,795
I stole it and read it.

1313
01:24:43,886 --> 01:24:47,468
Please don't be mad at me.
I did it for good reasons, I promise.

1314
01:24:47,556 --> 01:24:50,723
I would like to read a passage
from Mr. Blake's diary...

1315
01:24:50,810 --> 01:24:53,348
...dated April 12, 1957.

1316
01:24:54,354 --> 01:24:56,644
"I am a volcano of lust.

1317
01:24:56,774 --> 01:25:00,522
"I've gotten this far in business
by following my heart.

1318
01:25:01,028 --> 01:25:02,937
"And I must follow it now...

1319
01:25:03,364 --> 01:25:04,692
"...in love.

1320
01:25:06,408 --> 01:25:09,860
"If she just gives me a sign, an opening."

1321
01:25:10,246 --> 01:25:13,531
Want me to wipe the leaves
on your ficus tree, Mr. Blake?

1322
01:25:14,708 --> 01:25:16,452
You can call me Preston.

1323
01:25:18,504 --> 01:25:22,204
Want me to wipe the leaves
on your ficus tree, Preston?

1324
01:25:23,884 --> 01:25:24,880
Yes.

1325
01:25:27,054 --> 01:25:28,050
Yes.

1326
01:25:28,931 --> 01:25:29,927
Yes!

1327
01:25:31,142 --> 01:25:33,050
Who was this mystery woman?

1328
01:25:33,269 --> 01:25:37,895
I have here the Blake Media ledger
sign-in book from April, 1957.

1329
01:25:38,565 --> 01:25:43,643
On the night of the 12th, there was
only one woman working on Blake's floor.

1330
01:25:44,071 --> 01:25:48,567
Sadly, nine months later, she died,
giving birth to a son.

1331
01:25:49,118 --> 01:25:50,612
A son born...

1332
01:25:50,911 --> 01:25:53,829
...January 23, 1958.

1333
01:25:54,582 --> 01:25:56,124
That is my birthday.

1334
01:25:56,250 --> 01:25:58,408
To Miss Consuela Lopez.

1335
01:25:59,002 --> 01:26:00,414
That is my mother.

1336
01:26:00,587 --> 01:26:03,423
And the rightful heir to $40 billion!

1337
01:26:03,841 --> 01:26:05,335
That is my money?

1338
01:26:05,551 --> 01:26:08,006
A simple DNA test will show...

1339
01:26:08,137 --> 01:26:12,217
...that Emilio Lopez is
the majority stockholder to Blake Media.

1340
01:26:12,433 --> 01:26:14,591
-lt is my money!
-That's your money!

1341
01:26:14,769 --> 01:26:16,263
That is my money!

1342
01:26:17,896 --> 01:26:19,355
Way to go, Emilio!

1343
01:26:19,565 --> 01:26:21,937
I will do good things for everyone.

1344
01:26:22,317 --> 01:26:24,560
Free flamenco lessons for all.

1345
01:26:24,653 --> 01:26:26,729
People, people! Please!

1346
01:26:26,906 --> 01:26:30,405
-That is my money.
-Don't be misled. These are all lies.

1347
01:26:30,701 --> 01:26:31,981
Mr. Cedar...

1348
01:26:32,786 --> 01:26:34,197
...you are fired.

1349
01:26:34,413 --> 01:26:36,156
You can't fire me!

1350
01:26:36,749 --> 01:26:38,208
I'm in control!

1351
01:26:38,583 --> 01:26:40,162
Get your hands off me! I'm Chuck Cedar!

1352
01:26:40,752 --> 01:26:42,496
At the lake, when you saved my life...

1353
01:26:42,588 --> 01:26:45,458
...which I never got a chance
to properly thank you for...

1354
01:26:45,549 --> 01:26:48,041
-You're welcome.
-You said you didn't know who I was.

1355
01:26:48,135 --> 01:26:50,708
And it made me realize
I don't know who I am.

1356
01:26:50,805 --> 01:26:54,090
So I started working on it
and here's what I got so far.

1357
01:26:54,600 --> 01:26:58,051
My name is Babe Bennett.
I grew up in Syossett, Long Island.

1358
01:26:58,187 --> 01:27:02,231
I have brown eyes and I don't know
what my natural hair colour is anymore.

1359
01:27:02,608 --> 01:27:05,728
When I was in 5th grade,
I got a crush on Walter Cronkite.

1360
01:27:05,819 --> 01:27:09,438
I really did have that Holly Hobby notebook
I was telling you about.

1361
01:27:09,532 --> 01:27:13,612
I love Bruce Springsteen, Almond Roca
and Abbott and Costello movies.

1362
01:27:13,828 --> 01:27:16,034
I don't like liquorice or my ankles.

1363
01:27:16,455 --> 01:27:19,622
More importantly,
I know that I messed up real bad.

1364
01:27:19,791 --> 01:27:22,792
And I'd be willing to spend
the rest of my life...

1365
01:27:22,878 --> 01:27:25,250
...begging you to give me another chance...

1366
01:27:25,339 --> 01:27:28,043
...because I am so deeply in love with you...

1367
01:27:28,759 --> 01:27:32,175
...and I know it's definitely
that forever kind of love...

1368
01:27:32,262 --> 01:27:33,591
You're crazy.

1369
01:27:36,016 --> 01:27:37,808
You have beautiful ankles.

1370
01:27:48,070 --> 01:27:49,529
Let's go home.

1371
01:27:51,990 --> 01:27:54,742
You're fired! You! You!

1372
01:27:55,036 --> 01:27:57,526
Oh, you, sir. You are definitely fired.

1373
01:27:58,164 --> 01:28:03,205
I'd like to stay. I think I can really do
some good if I just got another chance.

1374
01:28:06,922 --> 01:28:10,967
Not fired. But tomorrow morning,
you let me change your socks.

1375
01:28:12,595 --> 01:28:13,590
Okay.

1376
01:28:14,889 --> 01:28:18,008
And you, Long-Long-Longfellow...

1377
01:28:18,267 --> 01:28:21,552
...you are the one
who made all this possible...

1378
01:28:21,645 --> 01:28:24,812
...with your beautiful words
and your beautiful spirit.

1379
01:28:24,982 --> 01:28:27,769
And Miss Bennett,
with her beautiful research.

1380
01:28:28,319 --> 01:28:29,861
How can I thank you?

1381
01:28:30,154 --> 01:28:33,439
All I want is your friendship, Emilio.
You're a good man.

1382
01:28:34,575 --> 01:28:35,773
I'll miss you.

1383
01:28:37,077 --> 01:28:38,073
Deeds!

1384
01:28:39,496 --> 01:28:42,332
-How about $1 billion?
-All right.

1385
01:28:42,875 --> 01:28:43,788
Done.

1386
01:28:56,638 --> 01:28:57,718
Holy Jeez!

1387
01:28:58,516 --> 01:28:59,974
I can't believe it!

1388
01:29:00,559 --> 01:29:03,015
-What's that?
-A letter from Hallmark.

1389
01:29:03,104 --> 01:29:05,595
They're actually going to buy
one of my cards.

1390
01:29:05,689 --> 01:29:09,770
-My gosh! Which one?
-The one I wrote for you, remember it?

1391
01:29:10,319 --> 01:29:11,729
Do I remember?

1392
01:29:12,404 --> 01:29:15,240
"Hard to breathe, feels like floating

1393
01:29:15,741 --> 01:29:18,362
"So full of love my heart's exploding

1394
01:29:18,619 --> 01:29:21,655
"Mouth is dry, hands are shaking

1395
01:29:22,081 --> 01:29:24,370
"My heart is yours for the taking

1396
01:29:24,833 --> 01:29:27,123
"Acting weird, not myself

1397
01:29:27,586 --> 01:29:30,208
"Dancing around like the Keebler elf

1398
01:29:30,505 --> 01:29:33,590
"Finally time for this poor schlub

1399
01:29:35,010 --> 01:29:38,177
"To know how it feels to fall in lub"

1400
01:29:38,764 --> 01:29:40,306
I'm so proud of you!

1401
01:29:46,146 --> 01:29:48,898
Can you believe Deeds bought us all these?

1402
01:29:53,487 --> 01:29:55,396
Damn, these things are fast!

1403
01:29:59,701 --> 01:30:00,982
I'm okay!

1404
01:30:02,037 --> 01:30:03,117
I'm okay!

1405
01:30:04,305 --> 01:30:10,448
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