Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM
No. Hey, Hazel.
You sleep any better last night?
He says, "How the hell should I know? It's 200 miles away."
And the wife says, "What was all that about?"
Then he slams the phone down.
He said, "I don't know. It's just some jackass asking if the coast was clear."
Hazel? Hazel?
Hey, Hazel.
I don't know what to say.
I guess I should say,
you're going to a better place.
Nothing but doggies.
Oh, maybe you don't want to hear that.
Maybe you just want to wait and see.
I'm gonna just sit here,
as long as they let me.
I'm giving him the sedative now.
He may close his eyes.
Okay. Now he's very relaxed.
I'm going to inject the pentobarbital.
This will stop his heart.
Okay. His heart has stopped.
I'm very sorry.
Take as much time as you need.
Excuse me?
You okay?
You seemed, um...
Oh, what? Are you saying you thought I was dead?
No, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay.
And you're okay.
Well, I'm not okay. I'm terrible.
Okay.
Who are you?
There was always another guy here. Richie.
Richie moved on.
He had a difference of opinion with the owners.
So, I'm the new guy.
Okay, clean away, new guy.
You don't look that old, by the way.
I mean, I wasn't worried because you look old.
Yeah, well, you know you always got to assume the worst.
Don't worry about it.
Hey.
Uh, excuse me. Excuse me.
Sorry, but can I ask you a favor?
Hey, you see anything?
I do not.
Well, keep looking. Check everywhere.
I just didn't... I didn't see anything.
So maybe he's gone.
Wouldn't you... I just can't imagine where it came from.
I mean, I've never even seen a mouse before, but a rat.
A big black rat.
I have to get back to... I should get back to work.
Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. I wasn't...
Thank you.
Sure. Lloyd.
Lloyd, I'm Carol. I'm sorry about before.
Oh, it's...
I'll be outside if the rat comes back.
All set.
Oh.
I suspect this was a black rat or what we call a roof rat.
Very common in Southern California.
But where do you think it came from?
Oh, they're everywhere.
They live in the trees. They're all over the city.
I will set a few traps to be sure,
but I think what we have here is an isolated incident.
Can I help you find something?
Well, I don't know. I'm...
I just wanted to make sure that I'm getting enough of everything.
Do you have any health issues you want to address?
No. No.
Okay, well then, let's just start with some basics.
Um, magnesium, do you take magnesium?
I don't think so.
You don't need all that.
Just right the way you are.
Hey, Rona, did you see Jerry today at the pool?
- Jerry who? - There's only the one Jerry.
No, there are three Jerrys.
Jerry Davis, Gerry Phillips, and Jerry Li.
See?
Gerry Phillips is Gerry with a G, though.
Does he count?
Do you know who he was with?
Which one?
Jerry Davis, for Christ's sake.
Girls, are we playing cards or what?
- Yeah. - Look, it's your bid, Georgina.
- One spade. - Pass.
- One no trump. - Pass.
Two no trump.
Pass.
Three no trump.
Okay, girls, got to tell you, I'm feeling good.
You are definitely not winning tonight.
Pass.
Okay, so who the hell was he with?
- Who? - Jerry Davis.
Oh, right. Jerry was with Karen.
Really?
And I could've sworn she was doing you-know-what to him in the pool.
- Sally! - What? No.
Not sex, Georgie.
I think she was just giving him a little tug.
Language!
- What language? - Tug.
How is that language? I said "tug."
I didn't say she was "jerking him off."
Oh, and that pool is so disgusting.
There are way too many people in that pool.
I love that pool.
Carol, when are you gonna move in here?
Susan just passed on. She was two cottages over.
That reminds me, we got new brochures
and I want you to see the new brochures.
I don't want to see the new brochures.
I saw the old brochures.
Well, I'm bringing them to your house this week.
Yeah, Carol, you're missing out on all the action.
You know, I'm happy in my house.
I'm very happy, thank you.
Guys ask about you all the time, Carol.
I could hook you up.
Oh, come on, don't start with that.
What?
Dating talk. The second husband talk.
You couldn't pay me.
But they do pay you, when they die.
Not always.
And who's saying "husband"?
Yeah, maybe you can date somebody.
Yeah, maybe I can stick a fork in my eye.
Well, it's not like you dated after Gary died.
When you've had the best, who cares about the rest?
You see, Rona, it's not when you had the best,
then you go out and get another one
and then another one, then another one and...
All right, all right, I've only been married three times.
- Only three? - Yeah.
Yeah, well, I'm with Georgina. I'm not interested.
Uh-uh. No more.
Oh, come on, Carol! Don't you even think about it?
I mean, just someone to go out with once in a while.
You know, it's not that simple.
If it were that simple...
What? You mean like you got to put out?
Like the Jerry in the pool.
No, that's not what she means.
I just mean, I don't like my life all complicated.
I like it just the way it is.
Hazel's gone, but I'm fine. Really. I'm just fine.
Ooh.
Let's just have the maximum shot count be 10, for Christ's sake.
Look, the shot count is however many strokes it takes
to get the ball in the hole.
Golf talk is so sexual-sounding, isn't it?
Balls, holes, strokes, putts.
Just count up your score, Sally.
And be honest.
- What is this, the PGA? - Uh-huh.
The Senior-Senior Tour.
I might have won on one of the holes.
One of the holes.
You want a drink?
It's early. I got to drive.
I didn't hear a "no." Excuse me.
I'll have a Bud and a chardonnay for this one.
Thanks, dear.
Oh, he's handsome.
What?
That guy.
Oh, yeah. I've seen him.
He talked to me the other day at the store.
Are you kidding me? My God, Carol!
He's so sexy.
He must be new. I'm gonna find out.
Hey, don't you dare.
You sit down.
Look at you like a nervous schoolgirl.
What are you afraid of?
Hey, you know what?
You should come with me tomorrow night to the speed-dating thing.
Oh, no, no, no.
Oh, come on.
They do it right inside the clubhouse.
You meet some guys, you talk a little.
It's not even dating. It's just socializing.
No big deal.
Maybe he'll be there.
Oh, thank you.
Okay, thank you.
Like new.
Yeah, well, what was wrong with it?
Well, they tend not to work so well when they come unplugged.
Oh.
Do you mind if I use your bathroom?
That was a long time ago.
Sorry, I'm nosy.
No, it's fine.
You were a musician?
Yeah, I was in a band a million years ago
in New York in the Village. I sang.
Is that your husband?
No. That's John.
My husband came later. Bill.
- I was in a band once. - Yeah, you were?
I sang, too. I mean, if you be...
If you use a very loose definition of singing,
you can call it singing.
Where was that?
That was in Austin. I just moved back.
What brought you back?
Well, I grew up here in the Valley.
So you have family here?
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm staying with my mom.
I mean, I'm living with her now.
It's a temporary situation.
Hey, you want a drink?
I was just gonna open a bottle, another bottle.
I...
I'm on the clock.
Oh, come on.
Just pretend to have a drink with me.
You want a little bit or the full treatment?
Let's try that full treatment.
Yeah.
Cheers, Lloyd.
Cheers.
Mmm.
This is really good.
Yeah, it's a good one.
So, what kind of music do you sing?
The closest I come to singing these days is karaoke night at the bar.
Yeah, but I started writing some songs.
Yeah? You're a songwriter?
No.
No, I'm definitely not a songwriter, but I studied poetry in college, so,
it's sort of the same thing.
You went to college just to write poetry?
Yeah. Hence the pool boy getup.
Well, I guess they're not hiring many poets these days, huh?
Not currently, no.
Haven't been since I can remember.
Perhaps ever.
But someday I'll have a lot of poems about pools.
But you were in... I mean, you were in like an actual band.
Just for a little while.
The photo of that guy you saw, he played the guitar.
The one that's not your husband?
Yeah, John.
So what happened with your husband?
You get divorced?
He died.
And I think they set it up so that you have to meet some new people
every couple of minutes. Ugh.
Doesn't that sound awful?
Oh, it's an experience, right?
Oh, yeah, an experience.
- I think it sounds fun. - Yeah?
Why not?
Yeah, why not?
I have to go meet my mother for dinner.
Oh, okay. I'm sorry I kept you so long.
Are you kidding me? This is great.
You are a good drinking buddy.
That's very sweet of you to say.
I'm not just saying that.
Hey, whatever happened to the rat?
The rat, the rat, he's... He left, I hope.
The guy said it was an isolated incident.
Whatever that means.
Do you, um...
I don't know, do you, maybe we...
Do you want to
hang out sometime? I don't mean like that. I...
Do you want to hang out like we did here, but we'll just...
We'll go out?
Not go out. Um... This is...
I just... Well, like meant, I was thinking maybe we could go to
the karaoke place or something and...
I would love to see you get up there and just knock 'em dead.
Maybe.
Okay. Cool.
Bye.
Oh, that's nice.
There are no men here.
They'll be here. Trust me.
I can't believe I'm doing this.
- Hey, you called me. - Well, I was drunk.
You know, my decision-making skills were very low.
Welcome, everyone. Welcome. Now, settle in.
Come on, settle down. Everyone find your seat. Find a seat.
All right, everyone sit down. Settle in.
Hello, everyone.
This is going to be really fun.
The boys are waiting back in that room, and in just a moment,
they're gonna come in and we're going to begin.
Each date lasts five minutes
and then we move down the table to the next date.
When I tap the spoon that's your 30-second warning
that the men are going to shift down to the next chair.
Now, that's your opportunity to exchange information,
if that's what you feel like doing.
Are we ready?
Yes!
Oh, come on! We can't do better than that?
Are you ready?
Yes!
That's a lot better.
So, let the dating begin!
Gentlemen, please come on out.
Good to see you.
Oh. Thank you for coming. Thank you.
I'm glad you could make it.
- Hi. - Hi.
Carol.
Yeah. Carol.
Oh, yeah.
I'm Carl. Funny.
Um...
- Is this your first time? - Yeah.
- Yeah. Same. - Yes.
Well, I...
I've had girlfriends.
But I am looking for somebody, you know, special.
But...
What are your interests?
Oh, you...
You mean, what do I like to do?
- Yeah. - Uh-huh.
Um...
By myself, or with other people?
Either.
How about your interests? What are they?
Um...
Well, right now,
I guess my interest is you.
Right. Yeah.
Well...
Thirty seconds to shift.
Oh, boy. Thirty seconds to shift.
All right.
Nice to meet you, Carol.
You, too. You, too.
Shift!
That's right. Shift down.
Everyone just move to the next table.
Yes, right there.
This is great.
Five minutes starts now.
I'm gonna cut to the chase here, if that's okay?
Okay.
Sex is still very important to me.
Oh.
No one told me you have to carry a sweater around
with you at all times in California.
The most important thing is that you're around all the time.
You know Barry Manilow is coming to town
and who doesn't love Barry Manilow?
What am I afraid of, herpes?
So I have herpes for a few years and then what,
I'm dead anyway, you know.
I mean, I don't have herpes, but it's okay with me if you do.
The last woman I dated was never there.
She was always playing bridge or at the movies
or having coffee with friends.
The AC is out of control.
I mean, what are they trying to do?
Refrigerate us?
I like having you there next to me.
If we were to go out, I'd like to get right to it, if you know what I mean.
We don't have much time left.
Let's just have some fun, huh?
So that wasn't so bad, right?
Not so bad?
I live a long healthy life for that?
What the hell was I doing in there?
Oh, lighten up.
Oh, yeah, did you talk to the herpes guy?
One of them had herpes?
No, he didn't care if I did.
This is nuts.
You?
I want to have lunch with you. What's your name?
Yes.
Your name is Yes?
Yes, I'll go to lunch with you.
Just like that?
How else would you like it to be?
- When? - Now.
- Now? - I'm hungry.
Just give me your phone number and I'll call you.
Ask you out properly.
Oh, you're on your way to a date right now. Is that it?
Just give me your number.
You have a pen and paper?
We seem to be in a real bind here.
I'll remember your number.
818-754-8737.
All right, I'll call you.
But who am I calling?
Carol.
Carol. I'm Bill.
Oh. Hi, hi. I'm looking for Lloyd?
Oh.
Well, can I leave him a message?
Hello?
Hey, Carol, it's Lloyd.
I got your message.
Is everything okay with the pool sweep?
Yes, Lloyd. Lloyd, uh,
is there any karaoke around tonight?
I'm sure there is, somewhere.
Oh, that'd be so great.
Um...
Hello?
Sorry, I'm thinking. I, um...
And I could definitely find a place.
Oh, good. So, you'll pick me up?
How you guys doing?
Hey.
What can I get you?
Oh, I don't know.
Well, I'll have whatever you're having.
Two Modelos.
Got it. All right.
Have you ever been here before?
Yeah, a few times. I like it.
Here you are. And here you go. Enjoy them.
Great, thank you.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Oh, that's good.
It's good to be out.
You had a rough day at the office?
Not exactly that, but...
Guess we're here a little early.
Yeah. Shouldn't this be happy hour?
Oh, no, no.
Nowadays people don't go out until pretty late.
- Really? How late? - Yeah.
- 10:00 or 11:00. - 10:00 or 11:00. Geez.
Even on a weeknight, huh?
Yeah.
Don't they have jobs?
Not so much anymore.
And here we go.
Wow. Looks good.
Mmm.
Wow. What did you make me?
That is called an appletini.
Appletini? Appletini.
Well, I got to write that down.
Mmm. Don't want to forget that.
Good.
You ever have one?
An appletini? No. No, I haven't.
Okay, so...
Oh, I got one.
- What is it? - Yeah. I'm not telling you.
Oh, yeah, yeah. I can do this one. Ready?
Yeah, I'm ready. I know what I'm gonna do.
Already?
Yeah. Oh, yeah, I do the same one every time.
I think we're alone now
Doesn't seem to be anyone around
I think we're alone now
The beating of our hearts is the only sound
Break it down for the organ break.
Running just as fast as we can
Holding on to one another's hands
Hands, hands
Trying to get away into the night
And you put your arms around me
And we tumble to the ground
And then you say, I think we're alone now
The beating of our hearts is the only sound
Thank you.
That was very good.
Thank you.
It looks like the 10:00 crowd is filtering in now.
God, it's about time.
Hey, you good? Did you sign up?
Yeah. Yeah.
Now, you say
You're lonely
You cried the long night through
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
And now you say
You're sorry
For being so untrue
Well, you can
Cry me a river
I've cried a river over you
You drove me, nearly drove me
Out of my head
While you never
Shed a tear
Yeah. Remember, I remember
All that you said
Told me love was too plebian
You told me you were through with me
And now
You say you love me
Well, just to prove that it is true
Come on, come on and
Cry me a river
'Cause I've cried a river over you
Thank you.
That was incredible. I have goose bumps.
Okay. Can we go now?
Already?
Yeah, I'd like to quit while I'm ahead.
Oh...
I'd definitely say you're ahead.
Wow.
I really needed that. God, that was...
I was scared at first, but it was really fun.
Why did you stop singing?
I don't remember.
I woke up one morning and I wasn't singing anymore.
Hey, do you want some coffee?
What?
Oh, come on.
Really, I am really making coffee.
Don't be an asshole.
Okay.
This is a really nice turntable.
Yeah, Bill was very picky about his stereo stuff.
Aha, the old...
What kind of plans do you have, Lloyd?
Uh, I'm not really in like a plan-making place.
No?
No.
I'm more just trying to sock some money away.
How did you earn your money?
I was a teacher.
Huh.
What did you teach?
Well, I taught reading, which I really loved.
And then I taught the classes that nobody else wanted,
like health and typing.
And so you earned your money and that's what you retired on?
No. On Bill's life insurance. I retired right after he died.
He died pretty young?
Yeah. A plane crash.
It was a really big news story back then.
It went on for a long time after.
A lot of people died.
He was on a business trip.
How long ago was that?
Twenty years ago this spring.
It's, I mean, that's... Stories like that,
that just make you want to live in the moment.
Screw the job.
Can't have it both ways, huh?
I guess not.
You don't get it because you're young.
You're looking forward to everything.
Um...
I don't think I'm looking forward to anything.
I mean, I moved back really to be with my mom.
She's been having some health issues and...
I don't know, I mean, nothing serious, but you know.
My dad died a few years back.
I don't even think she enjoys having me around, to be honest.
I'm just trying to be responsible.
Do the right thing.
You're doing the right thing, Lloyd.
And just know
that no matter what you do, it's all gonna just
run together by the time you're 50.
Yeah?
Yeah, I mean, time just goes by quicker.
I don't know,
maybe if my daughter had married and I'd had some grandchildren,
that might have slowed things down a little here and there.
I mean, people talk about living in the moment,
like it's some kind of a goal.
What does that even mean?
You know, I think it means...
You know, like, not being weighed down
by what you think you should be doing.
Oh, come on, that's impossible. There's no such thing as that.
I mean, didn't you feel it
when you were up on stage singing?
- Feel what? - Like that was it.
Like, while you were singing, that was all that existed.
Like that...
Like all your worries just disappear.
People can spend their whole lives doing that.
Waiting to find that feeling.
Trying to find that feeling over and over.
And in the end, everybody gets it.
We wait our whole lives for something and we get it.
And you know what that is?
Happiness?
It's death.
Yeah, I get it. I'm gonna get it.
I'm not very good at jokes. Sorry.
That was a joke?
Yeah, you're not very good at jokes.
Oh, God.
Hey, rise and shine.
Hey. You fell asleep
and I didn't know what to do with you,
so I just let you stay there.
Yeah.
Well, I'll make you some coffee and then you should go.
Okay, 'cause I got to start my day here.
Okay.
Oh, boy.
- Hi. - Hi.
Oh, hi. Hi. What are you doing here?
Uh, brought the brochures. They have floor plans now.
Okay, good. You want a cup of tea?
Sure.
Thank you.
Okay, so, who's the guy?
What guy?
The young guy with the bed head that I just ran into outside?
Oh, my God, you are such a snoop.
I am not a snoop.
I brought these over and I see a guy
leaving your house at 8:00 in the morning.
And I'm just wondering, of course, what's going on.
Mmm. Right. It's none of your business.
I think I know what's going on.
Are you some kind of cougar?
Yeah, right. That's me.
You're a cougar and I'm proud of you.
Will you get out of here?
But don't let him videotape you, 'cause it will be all over the Internet.
You should know.
Mmm-hmm.
You have two new messages.
Hey, Mom, it's Kath.
I got some frequent flyer miles, so I bought a ticket to L.A.
I haven't been down there in a while, so I just figured I'd book it.
I'll be in next Tuesday. I hope that's okay.
I'll call you later. Love you.
Next message.
I'm talking to a machine here, I guess.
But the machine said this was Carol.
So, Carol, this is Bill.
I remembered your number, so I thought I'd give you a call.
If you're not busy today,
why don't you come down to the clubhouse around 11:00?
I'll be on the patio waiting for you.
If not, hey, no big deal.
End of messages.
- Hi, Carol. - Hi.
Glad you came.
- Can I get you anything? - Oh...
No. No, thank you. I...
You know, I didn't know how to dress or...
I wasn't sure if I should bring my golf clubs or...
You're dressed just right. I don't play golf.
You live on a golf course and you don't play golf?
Yeah, it's just not my game.
Never had the patience.
We're gonna do something else today.
My car's out front. You ready?
- Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah?
Yeah.
Where are you taking me?
You'll see.
"So what?"
Miles Davis.
Oh.
Kind of Blue.
You know your stuff.
You don't get seasick, do you?
You ever fish?
Not really.
It's easy.
You just throw in a line and wait.
That's it, huh?
We're not gonna try too hard.
We're just gonna sit out here and enjoy the day.
Hey, you ever gonna light that thing?
I used to light them all the time.
Trying to be more health conscious in my later years.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
And someone once told me that I had a oral fixation. So...
So, you do this for all the girls?
I don't do this for anyone.
You're the first one out on my boat.
Really?
You think I'd lie?
I have no idea.
I mean, I'm being very trusting with somebody I don't know.
For all I know, you could be a murderer and you brought me out here to kill me
and dump me in the ocean, like The Sopranos.
You watch that show?
Every episode.
That was a great show.
No, I just bought this boat.
I took one look at my retirement and I said, "Screw it.
"I'm moving to California and I want a boat."
And where were you living?
I was in Dallas at the time.
I've lived in a lot of places.
I don't have any kids, no family, no one to leave it to.
I just decided,
I want to spend it all before I go.
How's that going for you?
So far so good.
You know, people that retire with all their money,
it's like they don't know what to do with themselves.
They just sit.
You know, watch TV.
Play golf.
You know, they go out and eat cheap dinners.
Go to the movies, the casinos.
I didn't want to end up like that.
So what are you doing living with all those people
at the retirement community?
I'm a social guy.
I don't like being alone.
But I like this, too.
I like being out here
away from all the noise.
When did your husband pass away?
1994.
You still seem kind of,
I don't know, mournful to me.
Do I?
Yeah.
There's like a...
I don't know, you seem kind of pissed.
- Pissed? - Yeah.
But in a sad sort of way, if that makes any sense.
Well, my dog died.
I had to put him down last week.
That must have been sad for you.
That'd piss me off.
I'm very sorry.
Well, I've been feeling,
I don't know, numb.
You know, I feel like I should be more sad.
He meant the world to me.
But...
I don't know, I just... I can't put my finger on it.
Yeah.
It's bittersweet.
You don't want them to suffer.
But you can't let them go.
It's hard to lose somebody.
No matter how many legs they have.
Just leaves a big hole.
Yeah.
How old was he?
Fourteen.
Wow. You've been through a lot together.
Yeah. You think he saw it that way?
Did you ever lose anybody?
A wife or...
My wife left me.
Then she died.
Boy, that would piss me off.
Could have been worse. Could have been me.
I like you a little bit, I think.
Yeah.
You're okay.
Thank you for a wonderful evening.
Day, I should say.
Yeah, I... God, I don't even remember the last time I spent
a whole day away from my house.
I had a great time.
Good. I'm glad.
- So... - Where you going?
Home. Isn't that where I am?
Okay.
Thank you.
Can I see you again?
You didn't hear anything in the walls last night?
Well, I didn't sleep here last night.
I don't see anything. I don't hear anything.
He might be in the walls, but...
I'll set a few more traps outside by your plumbing.
Okay. Good.
Oh, I'm getting another beer.
Anyone want a refill?
Maybe I'll split a beer with somebody.
I'm not splitting a beer with you.
Why not?
Last time, you got your lipstick all over the can
and you only had one freaking sip.
You want a whole one or not?
I don't know.
Maybe you can pour me a little in a glass?
Carol, do you want a refill?
- Carol. - What?
You haven't said a word all night.
I'm just thinking.
- About what? - I know.
You don't know, Ro.
What does she know?
Is there something you'd like to share with the group, Carol?
Anything you want to tell us?
No. There's nothing to share.
Okay, be like that.
Yeah, let's just play the game.
Come on, Rona.
What?
Carol, you want a refill?
- Yeah, I do. - All right.
Hey, actually, do you still have any of that medical marijuana?
Yeah.
I haven't smoked since the '70s.
How the heck does this thing work?
It's got to warm up.
It's like pre-heating an oven.
Have you smoked recently?
I can't even remember the last time I smoked.
Why am I so nervous?
My heart's beating really fast.
Why? You're not gonna OD.
Okay. Try it now.
But pull slow. This thing will mess you up.
I know what I'm doing.
All right, all right, let's get this going.
Where's the smoke? I don't see any smoke.
It's vapor.
Oh, man, oh, jeez. That's great.
Carol, you ready?
Me, me, me, me.
I don't know if I'm gonna do this.
I don't know.
There it is again. Did you hear that?
I didn't hear anything.
Really?
Me neither.
You both need hearing aids.
Where's Carol?
In the kitchen.
Same place she was two minutes ago when you asked.
I knew I shouldn't have smoked this stuff.
You've turned me into an advanced Alzheimer's patient.
Just try to relax, Georgie. It'll wear off. Yeah.
I'm feeling pretty good.
There it is again.
Well, what the hell is it?
Like a dog barking.
What kind of dog?
Like a little dog. Like a little teeny dog.
Really?
Yip.
Yep?
Yip.
- Got the munchies? - Mmm.
I'm just looking around.
This ceramic owl, it's really staring me down.
We found it!
What?
It was Sally's smoke detector.
What the hell did you do to that thing?
It was yipping like a dog.
Dead battery.
Well, what am I supposed to do with this?
Is there anything to eat?
You guys having a party?
No.
Oh, my God, this is good.
You can eat that?
We're eating mothballs.
Mothballs.
They're really good for your gums.
Wait, what is that?
There's a cop car back there.
- What? Why? - He turned away.
- That was a cop car? - Yeah.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, what the hell did we do?
Did we do something?
All right, we have done nothing, right?
Sober up.
Ladies.
What's going on here?
We've been shopping.
I can see that.
What are you doing in the street?
Well, there are no sidewalks, so how else are we gonna get home?
This neighborhood isn't very pedestrian-friendly, officer.
You can't arrest people for walking, can you?
No, I don't think so.
What about the shopping cart?
What about it?
You guys plan on returning that?
You know, technically that's theft.
Alphonse said that we could borrow this thing.
- Oh, Alphonse said. - Yeah.
Who's Alphonse?
He is the manager. Alphonse.
Yeah.
He said that to us personally.
We're just a bunch of old ladies.
We are turning right up the road
to our place where we live.
The Royal Oaks Village Retirement Village.
Sir, we are making...
She's just silly tonight.
Okay, look. Just stay safe.
All right? Stay out of the road.
Yeah?
Yes, sir. Aye aye, sir.
Thank you, officer.
Uh-huh.
Good-bye, officer.
Thank you very, very, very much, sir.
Good night.
Shh! Shh! Shh! Don't!
- Bye. - Bye!
Are you kidding me?
Oh, my God!
- I thought I was gonna choke. - Did you hear...
Alphonse? What's?
Alphonse? Who's Alphonse?
I made it up.
He was cute.
I didn't know they had cute policemen like that.
You have three new messages.
Hello, Carol, this is Bill. I'm just calling to say hello.
I'd like to see you again.
If you're not busy this week, give me a call.
Next message.
Hey, Mom, it's Kath. I didn't hear from you, so,
just making sure it's okay that I'm coming Tuesday.
Give me a call when you get a chance, okay? Love you.
Next message.
Listen. How about tomorrow night?
Let me know.
End of messages.
Hi, Carol.
Hi, stranger.
Are those for me?
No, I thought I'd just carry some flowers around tonight.
They're beautiful. Come on in.
I'll put them in some water.
Thank you.
Oh. Hot date tonight?
Rona!
Rona, this is Bill. Bill, Rona, my friend.
Nice to meet you, Rona.
I've seen you at the Oaks.
Did you two have plans?
No, actually I was just stopping by
to see if she wanted to take a walk, but,
I can tell you have more exciting plans, so...
- Bye. - Bye.
- Shall we? - Yeah.
So how you doing?
Really well.
Good.
So I'm thinking this is going okay.
Yeah.
That we might want to spend some more time with each other.
You want something to drink?
Are you gonna have anything?
Well, I... I don't know.
What are we doing? Are we doing something?
I think so.
Yeah, because you know, I'm out of practice with this
sort of thing.
And please don't say it's like riding a bike,
because I can't ride a bike to save my life.
It's just like swinging a golf club.
Well, now, how would you know that?
You don't play golf.
Oh, God.
Yeah. I guess it is more like riding a bike.
A very nice bike.
We should do it again.
I can't. Well, not now.
I don't mean now.
I need some time to recuperate.
It's been a while for me, too.
I don't believe that.
That's true.
What did your husband do?
Why are you asking me about my husband?
I was just curious.
I just want to know more about you.
He was a lawyer.
His name was Bill, by the way.
You got to be kidding.
What was he like?
Nothing like you.
I'm sorry, I don't have any jam.
Oh, no jam?
That's beautiful. Thank you.
So, uh, you know what, it's supposed to really get hot later on,
so I thought after we digest our breakfast,
maybe we'll have a swim?
That'd be good.
So, have you ever thought about getting remarried?
What?
God, I hope you're speaking theoretically.
Yeah, maybe.
What does that mean?
You're not speaking theoretically?
I'm just testing the water.
Well, just get out of the water.
I barely know you.
Too soon to ask your thoughts?
I never considered.
Never?
No. I mean, I've been married.
Well, we get married and the next thing is what?
I'm washing your underwear?
I guess that's part of being married, isn't it?
Oh...
Who could that be this early?
Oh.
Hey.
Is this a pool cleaning day?
Actually, I quit.
Ah.
The owners and I had differences.
Well, you know, actually we completely agreed
that I shouldn't be working there anymore.
Yeah, I just wanted to just, you know, come by and tell you that
I'm not gonna be cleaning your pool anymore, so...
Wow.
But I was looking for another job anyway.
An opening came up, so it all worked out well.
What kind of job did you get?
A pool cleaner.
Just a new outfit.
Pools By Us.
Well, with the economy the way it is,
I can't just go changing careers willy-nilly.
Got to stick with my skill set.
Um...
Carol, are we good?
Yeah, of course we are.
Okay.
- Ah. Bill. - Hey.
Bill, this is Lloyd. Lloyd, Bill.
- Hey, Lloyd. - Bill.
Lloyd's the pool guy.
Ah. The pool guy.
Actually I was just telling Carol that I'm not the pool guy anymore.
I mean, I'm not gonna be cleaning her pool.
Moving on to other pools.
Good luck with that.
So we're just having some breakfast.
You want to join us?
No, no, no, no, no. Thank you.
- Well, nice meeting you. - You, too.
Okay.
Yeah.
Bye, Carol.
So when can I see you again?
Well, my daughter's coming to town tomorrow,
so I need to spend a little time with her.
Your daughter?
Jesus, did I not tell you that I had a daughter?
No. Not that I asked.
Well, I have a daughter. Kath. Katherine.
Katherine.
I'd like to meet her sometime.
Well, I'll see about that.
Okay.
Look, I'm sorry.
This is just all really new for me.
I understand.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
I like you, Carol.
I'll let myself out.
Hi.
So glad to see you. Good flight?
It was all right. Yeah.
- Mom. - What?
Are we gonna talk at all on this visit
or are we just gonna sit quietly like this?
Do you want a glass of wine? 'Cause I want a glass of wine.
- How are you doing, Mom? - I'm fine.
No, I mean, really?
Really. Really, I'm fine.
'Cause you seem a little, I don't know.
What?
Different, I guess. Is it Hazel?
I mean, you always call me back and you didn't call me back till yesterday.
I almost canceled my ticket.
Oh, God, I'm sorry, honey.
I've just... I've been very, very busy.
With what? You're never busy.
No, I mean, not in a bad way. It's just...
You're never particularly busy.
I think that's pretty fair to say.
You know, I have a life, sweetie.
It may be hard for you to imagine, but I do have a life.
Okay. That's great, Mom. I was just curious.
God, where is that waitress?
I'm seeing somebody.
Are you serious?
Oh, my God. Is this the first time since Dad?
Twenty years?
- Wow! - Yeah.
See, I knew it. I knew something was different.
I could tell in your eyes.
You weren't as preoccupied with just yourself.
Oh, thanks.
Well, come on. You usually are. You know you are.
Well, I am preoccupied, that's for sure.
Yeah, you are. Do you like him?
How long has it been going on?
Well, like a couple of dates.
I don't know what the hell I'm doing.
Yeah, you like him.
No, seriously.
Well, are you gonna call him?
'Cause I'd really like to meet him actually.
- I don't know. - Oh, come on, Mom.
I'll make spaghetti and we'll just keep it real casual.
You know, we won't make a big deal out of it.
You're the one making a big deal out of it.
Whatever.
You have two new messages.
Carol, oh, God, I wish you had a cell phone.
It's Rona and I was at the clubhouse and...
Just call me, okay?
Next message.
Carol, for Christ's sake, call me on my cell phone!
Call me as soon as you can.
End of messages.
Excuse me. I'm here to see Bill, Bill Young.
He was admitted earlier today.
- Bill Young? - Yes.
Are you a family member?
No, I'm a friend.
I'm sorry, but at this time, only the immediate family is allowed.
Yes, but I just... I want to see if he's okay.
I'm so sorry, but I can't give you any information
unless you're a family member.
Couldn't we maybe leave a number
and you can contact us?
If you leave me your number, I'll try and get someone to call you.
Thank you.
Here. Give her my number.
Okay.
Thank you very much.
Thanks.
I don't know why we do this.
Do what?
Why we get attached to people in the first place.
It's always so much worry.
I barely know this man and look at me.
Well, you're a good person.
When you were young, when you were just a little baby...
Well, it's lucky you don't remember this because you were...
You were sick all the time.
There was a lot of
illness and hospitals
and sleepless nights.
Not really worth it, huh?
You were worth it.
Hello?
Yes.
Yes, yes, I am.
What...
What was it?
No, thank you, thank you for the call.
You doing okay?
I don't know.
You feel like talking?
You know, there's a...
There's a box or two of your things
that are still up in the guest room closet.
Maybe you should go through it before you head back.
Okay.
Mom.
Look what I found.
Where was this?
Maine, I think.
Oh, yeah.
You know, when that picture was taken,
growing old was the furthest thing from my mind.
I don't remember saying to your dad,
"Why don't you die in a plane crash, and I'll grow old alone."
You know, he wanted to get married, this guy.
- Bill? - Yeah.
I liked him.
I really liked him.
I just didn't know him.
Who knows? Maybe it would have worked out.
I mean, I just feel so incomplete.
Like there's supposed to be something more.
You've had a great life, Mom.
A full life.
A great husband and a career in music.
And a wonderful career as a teacher.
Not that wonderful.
And you had me.
It's all in the past tense.
Everything you just said is what I had, what I did.
I'm still here.
And you're the best of what I had.
You and Dad.
I loved your father, Kath.
Yeah, I know, Mom.
- Hi. - Hi.
Can I get you something?
Uh... Yeah. I'd like an appletini.
- Got it. - Please.
Actually, no, I'd like a Modelo.
Do you want a glass with that?
No.
Hey, is there karaoke tonight?
No, we actually only do that on Thursday nights.
Ah.
Sorry.
There you go. Enjoy.
Nice uniform.
Why, thank you.
Pools By Us has a little stricter dress code.
You like it?
Well, I like a man in uniform.
Come on in.
Would you like something to drink?
I'm okay.
Yeah.
I don't need the pool cleaned.
The guy just did it, actually.
Okay.
Did he do a good job?
Well, it was okay.
Sorry I stopped by the other day unannounced while your friend was here.
I should've called first. Um...
Are you okay?
The rat.
I got it! I got it.
What should I do with it? Should I kill it or...
Carol, are you okay?
Carol.
I just lost my friend.
That guy that you met, Bill.
He died. He died.
That's terrible.
And I keep wondering
what made his body stop.
What made it say,
"I'm done."
I just don't get it, Lloyd.
There's nothing to get.
I hate that fucking rat.
We got it. We got you.
That might be my biggest accomplishment right now.
Come on, you're young. You got a lot more life to...
Screw it up even more?
You got plenty to show for it. You know that, Lloyd.
I wrote a song.
I want to hear it.
Yeah, someday I'll sing it to you.
No, I want to hear it now.
- Really? Right now? - Mmm-hmm.
Um...
I mean, I would need a guitar or something.
Okay. Uh...
I'm not finished with this.
It's a work in progress, so,
keep your expectations low.
I walk alone
I didn't know where I was going
I felt so low
As the moonlight started showing
Then I saw you
Somewhere in the distance and you said
"How are you?
"You're not gonna want to miss this"
When the sun goes down
I think of you now
When the moon comes up
I don't turn around
I just stare at the darkness
And I think of you there
Way across the distance
Of that star-filled air
And I know I'll see you
I'll see you in my dreams
Sometimes things may flee you, but
They never, ever leave
So I'll see you, I'll see you
I'll see you in my dreams
I'll see you, I'll see you
I'll see you in my dreams
Dreams, dreams
I mean, it's not about pools, but...
Thank you, Lloyd.
For what?
For coming by.
Playing that song.
And for catching the rat.
I'm glad I was here.
Me, too.
Should we do something about that guy?
You want a drink?
God. I think I got to get out of here.
Go on a cruise or something.
What do you say? You guys want to go with me?
Oh, come on, ladies. I know you can all afford it.
Yeah, depends on where.
- And when. - And why.
Iceland.
Look, I don't know. Any place.
I told you why. I'm feeling agitated.
You mean, uh, horny?
That's what you mean.
I hear good things about Iceland.
Well, I'm gonna go to New York next month to see Kath.
Great, so why don't we meet in New York,
hop on a boat someplace.
You guys, I get seasick,
and I keep reading about people getting stranded
and people getting sick and having that horrible diarrhea.
That sounds fun, right?
And that fella Bill, he had a boat, didn't he?
Yeah. So What.
Oh, I was just asking.
No, no, Georgia.
It was the name of the boat, So What.
So what ever happened to the boat?
And all his stuff? No family?
He really had no one?
No. No family. Really.
Truly, truly, nobody. He had a lawyer.
And judging by the funeral, he had a lot of friends.
I asked his lawyer if I could keep one of his things.
What happened to his boat? To everything?
I don't know.
I mean, last I saw, it was still at the dock.
You know, I can't know anymore.
I don't want to know.
God, I'd be dying to know.
Yeah, I know you would.
Hey, what the hell? Let's go. Let's go to Iceland.
- That sounds great. - It does.
Now, that's what I'm talking about.
I will bring Dramamine, Rona. You will be fine.
And Imodium.
Why didn't I think of that? Imodium.
That's Beenie. He's a sweetheart.
He's older. I think he's about 11 or 12.
He is a sweetie.
A family had to give him up. I forget why.
Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org