1 00:00:18,500 --> 00:00:20,500 == Subs by Sub*Sequenta == 2 00:00:23,477 --> 00:00:27,560 This is Houston. We're about to lose radio contact. 3 00:00:29,477 --> 00:00:33,311 This is Houston. We're about to lose radio contact. 4 00:00:38,269 --> 00:00:42,311 This is Houston. We're about to lose radio contact. 5 00:00:56,978 --> 00:01:01,895 -Wake up! Wake up! -What?! 6 00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:05,603 -I can't sleep. -For fuck's sake. -We've lost communication. 7 00:01:05,686 --> 00:01:09,395 -If I can't communicate with people I love, what does that mean? -Peace and quiet. 8 00:01:09,478 --> 00:01:11,478 -Do I exist? -Oh my God. 9 00:01:11,562 --> 00:01:14,103 -Do you believe in God? -For fuck's sake, what time is it?! 10 00:01:14,187 --> 00:01:17,603 -Are we going to crash into the sun? -Probably. -Like Icarus. 11 00:01:17,687 --> 00:01:22,270 No, Icarus' downfall was due to hubris. Excessive pride. 12 00:01:22,354 --> 00:01:24,979 -I wonder what my downfall is? -Being an dick? 13 00:01:25,062 --> 00:01:27,812 Are you making a video? 14 00:01:29,937 --> 00:01:31,521 No... 15 00:01:31,604 --> 00:01:35,062 I see the laptop screen. Get to bed. 16 00:01:37,354 --> 00:01:40,146 You looked like death-warmed-up earlier. 17 00:01:41,854 --> 00:01:45,521 Marion, have you looked in the mirror lately? 18 00:01:45,604 --> 00:01:50,229 -Stay out of this, Mom. -There's a hair on your chin I could swing on! 19 00:02:26,272 --> 00:02:29,272 What are you looking at? 20 00:02:32,981 --> 00:02:35,106 Fucking hell! 21 00:03:07,482 --> 00:03:09,148 Anna! 22 00:03:32,816 --> 00:03:34,274 Get out! 23 00:03:34,357 --> 00:03:37,274 -I'm late! -I don't care! 24 00:03:37,357 --> 00:03:42,649 -Didn't you use to live in a commune? -Yes, but we didn't shower together. 25 00:03:42,732 --> 00:03:48,608 -Is it too much to ask to get dressed before you leave the house? -I haven't left the house. 26 00:03:48,691 --> 00:03:54,024 If you two don't get out of here in 5 seconds I will pull back this curtain. 27 00:03:54,108 --> 00:03:57,066 Oh my god, what is that?! -Mom! 28 00:03:57,150 --> 00:04:00,691 Five, four. 29 00:04:00,775 --> 00:04:03,608 There is post for you. -Three. 30 00:04:03,691 --> 00:04:06,691 -I don't care. -Two. 31 00:04:06,775 --> 00:04:10,025 Can we have a chat about your birthday tonight? -One! 32 00:04:10,108 --> 00:04:13,233 Oh my God, mom! 33 00:06:02,236 --> 00:06:04,278 Sorry.. 34 00:06:07,528 --> 00:06:12,320 -You look like you're lactating. -You need to be having sex for that. 35 00:06:16,820 --> 00:06:19,695 Is work interfering with Maggie's sun tan regime? 36 00:06:19,778 --> 00:06:24,070 She called me at half-7 to tell me about her fungal infection. 37 00:06:24,154 --> 00:06:29,029 -This is not the week for her to be off sick. -What's with the moles? 38 00:06:29,112 --> 00:06:34,446 They want us to keep a record of how many new ones come up every day. 39 00:06:34,529 --> 00:06:38,487 Something about old people tripping over them. 40 00:06:38,571 --> 00:06:41,654 Excuse me ladies, I just found this outside. 41 00:06:41,737 --> 00:06:44,779 Sometimes I wish the suffragettes hadn't bothered. 42 00:06:49,821 --> 00:06:52,988 Hello. You're a bit late for work, are you? 43 00:06:54,821 --> 00:06:59,780 My boss is away this week. I've got the office to myself. - You lucky git. 44 00:07:02,280 --> 00:07:04,863 I've got something for you. 45 00:07:07,405 --> 00:07:09,363 Shit! 46 00:07:13,655 --> 00:07:16,780 It had arms and a face. 47 00:07:16,863 --> 00:07:22,739 If I sent a photo, you might think that I just googled it. 48 00:07:22,822 --> 00:07:26,239 But now I'm standing here holding an old man's dick. 49 00:07:26,322 --> 00:07:29,239 -How's the book going? -Yeah, it's good. 50 00:07:29,322 --> 00:07:31,614 What's it about again? 51 00:07:31,697 --> 00:07:36,739 It's about a cat who goes away. They wonder where the cat's gone ... 52 00:07:36,822 --> 00:07:39,281 -Are you the cat? -No, I'm not the cat. 53 00:07:43,489 --> 00:07:47,656 -Have you been washing up? -I've got a wet bra on. 54 00:07:49,198 --> 00:07:52,531 I thought you'd been dipping them in your tea. 55 00:08:44,116 --> 00:08:48,408 -Ladies and gentlemen. Who are we? 56 00:08:48,491 --> 00:08:53,033 Billy and Anna are twins who grew up in the arse end of nowhere. 57 00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:54,949 Yorkshire, Yorkshire! 58 00:08:55,033 --> 00:08:59,241 They spend their days like any radicals on the fringe of society would. 59 00:08:59,325 --> 00:09:03,241 Dressing up like TV detectives from the 1970s. 60 00:09:03,325 --> 00:09:06,158 -and imagining they were in the A-Team. 61 00:09:06,241 --> 00:09:09,658 ... in 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison ... 62 00:09:09,741 --> 00:09:13,325 It was a happy time. Where dreams of the future were forged. 63 00:09:13,408 --> 00:09:15,492 As far back as I can remember, I've always wanted to be ... 64 00:09:18,575 --> 00:09:20,700 As far back as I can remember, I've always wanted to be ... 65 00:09:22,658 --> 00:09:24,242 You gotta be kidding? 66 00:09:24,325 --> 00:09:26,409 As far back as I can remember, I've always wanted to ... 67 00:09:29,617 --> 00:09:34,159 After narrowly avoiding being beaten up their nan explained a painful home truth: 68 00:09:34,242 --> 00:09:38,492 It's a thin line between a maverick artistic genius 69 00:09:38,576 --> 00:09:41,451 or just some arsehole that everyone finds annoying. 70 00:09:41,534 --> 00:09:46,451 Astonished by the insight of this advance, the twins forged a creative vision to help others 71 00:09:46,534 --> 00:09:49,243 -and thus "How To Live!" ... 72 00:09:49,326 --> 00:09:51,618 Stick the kettle up. 73 00:10:08,410 --> 00:10:13,285 Do you know what happened to the microwave? 74 00:10:13,368 --> 00:10:15,868 Whose is that? 75 00:10:21,368 --> 00:10:25,327 Anna, this is my new hairdresser. Luke. 76 00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:30,577 -She doesn't always look this bedraggled -I think you look great. 77 00:10:30,660 --> 00:10:35,535 You're clearly blind, Luke. I still have spots of gray hair as well. 78 00:10:36,327 --> 00:10:41,911 -Don't be like that, don't walk off. He'll give you a nice haircut. -Brilliant, mum, but I'm busy. 79 00:10:41,994 --> 00:10:44,994 Sorry, Luke. Anna! 80 00:10:53,244 --> 00:10:56,078 -You're being rude. -I've got work to do! 81 00:10:56,161 --> 00:11:00,370 -What are you busy working on? I hope you're not making those bloody film videos. 82 00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:08,286 You look like a homeless teenager. You should have a dog on a piece of string. -Some men like women who aren't making an effort. 83 00:11:10,078 --> 00:11:14,078 You don't look like you haven't made an effort; You look like you can't afford to. 84 00:11:14,162 --> 00:11:19,203 You want to have a go at me as well? What do you think about my hair cut? 85 00:11:19,287 --> 00:11:24,412 It not as bad as the one that is immortalized in your passport where your gender is in question. 86 00:11:24,495 --> 00:11:30,162 Anna. I'm trying to do something constructive for your welfare. 87 00:11:30,245 --> 00:11:36,120 -Bon Jovi is still here. -Don't shut the door. We're not finished! 88 00:11:36,204 --> 00:11:40,662 -Anna. Just come and have a cup of tea. -I'm working. 89 00:11:47,662 --> 00:11:49,163 Mum! 90 00:11:53,121 --> 00:11:55,871 -Mum. Calm down, Marion. 91 00:11:55,954 --> 00:11:58,871 Don't tell me to calm down. It can't go on. 92 00:11:58,954 --> 00:12:02,246 18 months in a shed is too much. 93 00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:05,038 Let's not row now, please. 94 00:12:05,121 --> 00:12:09,038 -You said you'd be out by now. -I didn't, you decided I would. 95 00:12:09,121 --> 00:12:14,163 -You need to get on with things. You're gonna be 30 next week. -Getting on with what? Getting a boyfriend? 96 00:12:14,247 --> 00:12:19,080 Well yeah, if it stops you moping around, making them bloody film videos. 97 00:12:19,163 --> 00:12:22,163 -Well fine. You talk to her. 98 00:12:22,247 --> 00:12:25,414 What your mom is trying to say ... 99 00:12:25,497 --> 00:12:30,247 -It's not normal living in my shed at your age. -Well you live with your mum and you're well old. 100 00:12:30,330 --> 00:12:33,955 She just means it's time you started doing things again. 101 00:12:34,039 --> 00:12:37,872 -You can move into the house. -No. I'm not doing that. 102 00:12:37,956 --> 00:12:43,414 Let's start again. What your mom means, you're not really living right now. 103 00:12:43,497 --> 00:12:46,956 When I was your age I wanted to have an adventure. 104 00:12:47,039 --> 00:12:50,581 Oh sheesh! She doesn't need a bloody adventure. 105 00:12:50,664 --> 00:12:55,289 Anna you need to move on. I think we need to find you a nice flat nearby. - Good luck with that. 106 00:12:55,373 --> 00:13:00,998 I mean it. I want you out of my shed by your birthday. This ends now! 107 00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:08,540 Do you want me to look at your hair? 108 00:15:17,627 --> 00:15:20,168 Anna, are you up? 109 00:15:22,918 --> 00:15:25,168 Anna? 110 00:15:25,252 --> 00:15:30,210 I was thinking. Should we just do a show for your birthday? 111 00:15:30,294 --> 00:15:33,627 Westlife plays around the Civic. 112 00:15:34,669 --> 00:15:39,127 We should book it now, if you want to. Maybe go to a restaurant ... 113 00:15:47,127 --> 00:15:50,752 Anna. It's still your birthday you know! 114 00:16:00,169 --> 00:16:05,753 -Were you up all night watching "Grease" on the telly? -No. Were you? 115 00:16:05,836 --> 00:16:10,211 -My mom had it on. -Oh aye, my mom had it on. 116 00:16:10,295 --> 00:16:13,170 Have you seen "Grease"? -Yes. 117 00:16:13,253 --> 00:16:17,545 At the end he comes on in a white coat, dressed like her. 118 00:16:17,628 --> 00:16:21,920 And she turn up in black, just like him. 119 00:16:22,003 --> 00:16:27,337 He just takes off his coat, like yeah, we'll just dress like me then. 120 00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:30,504 It's not even a discussion. Like maybe they could dress like her. 121 00:16:30,587 --> 00:16:35,004 I know it's the 50s, but that's everyday sexism, gone mad. 122 00:16:36,087 --> 00:16:39,254 -There's 21. -How do you know that? 123 00:16:39,337 --> 00:16:42,046 I like counting. 124 00:16:45,712 --> 00:16:51,837 If we were ancient Greeks, I'd be like Apollo. Like all rational and a bit anal. 125 00:16:51,921 --> 00:16:56,754 But you would be exciting and arty, like Dionysus. 126 00:16:58,213 --> 00:17:02,921 Dionysus is the good one. Most people want to be Dionysus. 127 00:17:04,129 --> 00:17:06,296 Bye. 128 00:17:08,921 --> 00:17:13,255 Alice, you did classics, right? Who was Dionysus? 129 00:17:13,338 --> 00:17:18,255 A sex-obsessed pisser. You shouldn't personify the moles, you know. 130 00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:21,338 Hello, kids club! 131 00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:40,797 You have to take your hat off. You need to take your hat off. 132 00:17:54,131 --> 00:18:00,548 Please, do not use use the oars as weapons. I repeat, do not use the oars as weapons. 133 00:18:01,256 --> 00:18:04,381 -Little shit... -The mic's still on! 134 00:18:46,257 --> 00:18:49,799 What the hell? Are you trying to kill me? 135 00:19:06,300 --> 00:19:09,800 Marion, you have my cup of tea? 136 00:19:11,008 --> 00:19:13,050 Marion? 137 00:19:13,133 --> 00:19:20,633 It's next door's daughter and her little boy. Guess that means there's not long now. 138 00:20:57,428 --> 00:21:01,011 -Hi! When did you get back? -Yesterday. 139 00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:07,595 I've got to wait 2 weeks for my flat, so I thought I'd come home. Get my sister to do my washing. Show off my tan. 140 00:21:07,678 --> 00:21:11,220 -How are you feeling? -Yeah, good. A bit jetlagged. 141 00:21:11,303 --> 00:21:14,553 Mensies surging out of me, as usual. 142 00:21:14,636 --> 00:21:19,262 -Fucking hell, you're living in here? -Yeah, I just needed some space. 143 00:21:19,345 --> 00:21:22,220 There is not a lot of space in here. 144 00:21:22,303 --> 00:21:25,345 You remember, you, me and Billy used to make dens in here? 145 00:21:25,428 --> 00:21:29,845 Your mother would turn off the electricity, to get us to come in for our tea. 146 00:21:35,179 --> 00:21:40,512 It's so weird being back. I can't get used to it. Being in the sun every day. 147 00:21:40,595 --> 00:21:46,346 I've been really good about wearing sun cream though, so I don't think I've got any skin damage. 148 00:21:49,137 --> 00:21:54,387 Hi Patrick. How are you? Yeah, you're right, I have lost weight. 149 00:21:56,513 --> 00:22:00,721 So, I've got something for you. 150 00:22:04,596 --> 00:22:07,513 You're gonna be 30. 151 00:22:09,596 --> 00:22:14,555 -What are we gonna do for it then? We gotta do something! -Why? 152 00:22:14,638 --> 00:22:20,805 Why don't we have a happy un-birthday night. It will be fun! 153 00:22:23,930 --> 00:22:29,347 -You're still mkaing your videos? -No. I needed to renew the domain name. 154 00:22:31,764 --> 00:22:34,764 -Do you wanna watch "Rocky"? -Yes! 155 00:22:39,889 --> 00:22:42,305 I've got it downloaded. 156 00:22:43,347 --> 00:22:46,556 -I've missed you. -I've missed you. 157 00:23:47,141 --> 00:23:49,557 Two minutes! 158 00:24:00,266 --> 00:24:03,891 -Hi. Are you OK? -Yeah! 159 00:24:03,974 --> 00:24:09,475 -Your mom came into the office. You're looking for a flat? -God, my mum can just fuck off! 160 00:24:09,558 --> 00:24:14,683 -I like your badges. What is the green one for? -I don't know. 161 00:24:14,766 --> 00:24:18,475 I think we should get badges for adult life skills. 162 00:24:18,558 --> 00:24:25,975 You know like changing a car tire, or sowing, or sending something back in a restaurant. 163 00:24:30,308 --> 00:24:35,309 -Is that Brendan Myers? Since when did he move back? -He's come back to write his masterpiece. 164 00:24:35,392 --> 00:24:38,142 What the hell are you wearing? 165 00:24:40,309 --> 00:24:44,309 -You're looking for faeces? -Yeah. 166 00:24:44,392 --> 00:24:48,851 You are very good at spotting them. Maybe you could get a badge for looking for faeces. 167 00:24:48,934 --> 00:24:51,434 Show your lunch box, Linford! 168 00:24:52,684 --> 00:24:59,601 Hiya, Brendan. How are you doing you big sexy beast? Your buttocks are like glistening orbs in the morning dew. 169 00:24:59,684 --> 00:25:02,768 Sorry to interrupt for objectifying you. 170 00:25:02,851 --> 00:25:09,435 You do realize Anna's sitting and peeing? Do you not see the steam? Maybe give her a tissue. 171 00:25:09,518 --> 00:25:13,560 I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 172 00:25:13,643 --> 00:25:19,768 There are nettles down there so be careful. You do not want a nettle on your fanny. 173 00:25:23,227 --> 00:25:27,352 You're a bully. -Does he still love the Spice Girls? 174 00:25:27,435 --> 00:25:31,518 He's a lot taller than I remember. Not that that actually means anything. 175 00:25:31,602 --> 00:25:35,852 I learned this after a very disappointing encounter with a basket player. 176 00:25:35,935 --> 00:25:39,852 It has nothing to do with height, or feet or anything like that. 177 00:25:39,935 --> 00:25:46,061 There were these Korean guys, and they measured them and found it is all in the second and fourth digits. 178 00:25:46,144 --> 00:25:48,352 So the key is, look at a guy's hands. 179 00:25:48,436 --> 00:25:54,602 Listen to me, otherwise you're gonna end up with some nice guy who's got a poor digital ratio 180 00:25:54,686 --> 00:25:57,477 -and your vagina is never going to forgive you. 181 00:25:57,561 --> 00:26:00,769 So you've already bumped into the prodigal one? 182 00:26:00,853 --> 00:26:06,728 Yeah, what are you doing here? -Saving the day. I'm helping her out with the kids company. 183 00:26:06,811 --> 00:26:09,894 You're dressed accordingly. -Yes. 184 00:26:09,978 --> 00:26:16,186 -That's just not appropriate footwear -I'm Miss Scarlet. This is my contemporary interpretation. 185 00:26:16,270 --> 00:26:19,103 I'm getting into my past, Stanislavski style. 186 00:26:19,186 --> 00:26:24,478 -Do you think Stanislavski wore porn shoes? -They're your porn shoes. 187 00:26:24,562 --> 00:26:26,520 Fuck! 188 00:26:26,603 --> 00:26:30,978 Hang on! I need you to play the victim. -What? 189 00:26:34,395 --> 00:26:37,354 -So you're with anyone? -Only in the mirror. 190 00:26:37,437 --> 00:26:42,312 Maybe you should become a lesbian. It would quite suit you. 191 00:26:42,395 --> 00:26:47,271 I think you should get more in touch with yourself. 192 00:26:47,354 --> 00:26:51,187 -Try yoga, meditation ... -Stop! No! 193 00:26:51,271 --> 00:26:55,771 You promised that when you came back you wouldn't be wanker. 194 00:26:55,854 --> 00:27:01,438 Well if you'd come with me like you were supposed to, you'd be a wanker too. 195 00:27:01,521 --> 00:27:04,771 -That doesn't make any sense. -This is taking ages. 196 00:27:04,854 --> 00:27:08,396 -Because you're such a fat fucking bitch. -Come on. 197 00:27:17,271 --> 00:27:20,646 Look. Come on. 198 00:27:22,105 --> 00:27:27,022 I want you to survey the scene. 199 00:27:27,105 --> 00:27:32,355 Something is wrong. Things don't add up. 200 00:27:32,438 --> 00:27:36,980 Look at the people. How are they behaving? What are they hiding? 201 00:27:37,064 --> 00:27:40,189 How do they give themselves away? 202 00:27:40,272 --> 00:27:42,772 She's alive. Case solved. 203 00:27:42,855 --> 00:27:45,730 -It's only a game. -A rubbish one. 204 00:27:45,814 --> 00:27:49,606 Right! Let's go and interview Miss Scarlet. 205 00:27:49,689 --> 00:27:54,314 Then we're gonna look at a capsule of information about the victim. 206 00:27:54,397 --> 00:27:57,606 -You look like Clint Eastwood. -My name is Clint. 207 00:27:57,689 --> 00:28:01,314 -Very funny. -Why? 208 00:28:01,398 --> 00:28:05,898 -You serious? -Yeah. My dad is a cowboy. He blows buildings up with dynamite. 209 00:28:05,981 --> 00:28:10,981 -Like a re-enacter? -Yeah, that's what I wanna do when I grow up. 210 00:28:16,856 --> 00:28:21,023 Do you want to see the fastest gunslinger in the West? 211 00:28:23,148 --> 00:28:25,982 -Did you see it? -You didn't do it. 212 00:28:26,065 --> 00:28:29,773 -No, it's a joke. -It's not funny. 213 00:28:30,940 --> 00:28:34,357 -One. -Four. - Two. -Four. 214 00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:36,732 -Three. -Four. 215 00:28:36,815 --> 00:28:40,232 -Four. -Four. 216 00:28:40,315 --> 00:28:43,065 -Six. -Four. Four, four, four. 217 00:28:43,149 --> 00:28:45,190 Fourteen. 218 00:29:04,899 --> 00:29:08,108 -Oh my God! Oh my God! -What the fuck's up with you? 219 00:29:08,191 --> 00:29:12,691 -We're gonna hit the sun. -Fucking hell. You need to read "On the beach". 220 00:29:12,775 --> 00:29:18,483 It's about people awaiting the arrival of deadly radiation. And how they're dealing with their impending death. 221 00:29:18,566 --> 00:29:23,941 They just went on, had picnics and did gardening and stuff. Basically you need a goal. Like Rocky. 222 00:29:24,025 --> 00:29:29,150 Rocky trains to win the fight, and in doing it, he regains self respect. Makes peace with the person he'll never become. 223 00:29:29,233 --> 00:29:34,358 -Adrian says it in "Rocky 3". -When she finally grows a pair. 224 00:29:34,442 --> 00:29:37,609 When she wears that great corral lipstick. -When she's finally given some lines.- When she wears that nice necklace. 225 00:29:37,692 --> 00:29:44,984 What are you doing, you nutter? You need to look after this little dude, cause he's driving the other kids mental. 226 00:29:54,359 --> 00:29:58,276 -Can you stop that? -I'm bored. 227 00:29:59,817 --> 00:30:01,776 Why don't you draw her a picture. 228 00:30:01,859 --> 00:30:06,943 No, I'm not drawing a picture. People will look at it and see what my feelings are doing inside. 229 00:30:07,026 --> 00:30:11,026 Well why don't you draw her a flower. Or a rainbow. 230 00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:18,568 Can I have one? 231 00:30:27,235 --> 00:30:29,943 You missed a bit. 232 00:30:33,693 --> 00:30:36,318 You missed another bit. 233 00:30:41,569 --> 00:30:43,735 And there. 234 00:30:47,110 --> 00:30:51,736 -Don't say anything. -What on earth have you been doing. Come here. 235 00:30:52,986 --> 00:30:55,152 Mum! That is rank! 236 00:30:55,236 --> 00:30:58,152 I can not believe it! 237 00:30:59,527 --> 00:31:05,861 Doesn't she look fun? Fantastic. 238 00:31:05,944 --> 00:31:08,528 Mind your fingers. 239 00:31:11,736 --> 00:31:14,486 Your face is so slim now, I can't get over it. 240 00:31:14,570 --> 00:31:18,570 Thanks. Yeah, I got dysentery when I was in India. It was great. 241 00:31:18,653 --> 00:31:23,945 -When do you go back to London and start work? -Actually I'm gonna have a bit of a career change. 242 00:31:24,028 --> 00:31:30,987 I got into a real energized headspace. I'll be a choreographer and be a yoga teacher. 243 00:31:31,070 --> 00:31:35,278 -I'm rebooting. -It is a good time to make a fresh start. 244 00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:44,237 Anna's problem is that her childhood ambition was to be rescued by David Hasselhoff of Baywatch. 245 00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:50,821 -I wanted to be David Hasselhoff. -If that isn't the cause of an existential crisis, I don't know what is. 246 00:31:50,904 --> 00:31:53,779 -Anna need a way to motivate herself. -I can hear you! 247 00:31:53,862 --> 00:31:58,279 Annas's got ways to motivate herself. She just thinks of Patrick Swayze topless. 248 00:31:58,362 --> 00:32:00,987 Not in "Point Break". That makes me wanna vomit. 249 00:32:11,529 --> 00:32:14,321 Why can't you be more like Fiona? 250 00:32:14,405 --> 00:32:19,946 -What? Go away for 2 years and shack up with a fat South-African? -No, I didn't mean that. 251 00:32:20,030 --> 00:32:24,196 -She's just focused, isn't she? -Leave her alone. 252 00:32:24,280 --> 00:32:27,780 Anna's just having a little think about what she wants. 253 00:32:27,863 --> 00:32:33,905 -What I want is for you to leave me alone. -Well I'll leave you alone, while you look around this. 254 00:32:35,072 --> 00:32:36,572 What? 255 00:32:39,364 --> 00:32:43,530 -I never thought you'd move back here permanently. -Well, you have. 256 00:32:43,614 --> 00:32:46,905 Not permanently, only while I write my book. 257 00:32:46,989 --> 00:32:52,531 -I changed it again, now it's about this ballet dancer... ... Is that you? 258 00:32:57,572 --> 00:33:02,781 Have you had a look around? -Yes. And it made me want to slit my forehead and bleed all over the floor. 259 00:33:02,864 --> 00:33:07,364 It's like a contraceptive made of chipboard and pebbledash. 260 00:33:07,448 --> 00:33:10,656 If she moves in here, her hymen will grow back. 261 00:33:10,739 --> 00:33:14,239 -What does it always have to be about sex? -Cause everything is about sex. 262 00:33:14,323 --> 00:33:19,323 I'm gonna put you on the internet, and find a Neanderthal that'll blow out the cobwebs in ... 263 00:33:19,406 --> 00:33:23,031 I'm not moving out until I've worked out what I'm doing. So back off. 264 00:33:23,115 --> 00:33:27,365 You said that five months ago. Time's up. 265 00:33:31,323 --> 00:33:33,323 Bye. 266 00:33:34,448 --> 00:33:36,073 See you. 267 00:33:59,032 --> 00:34:02,491 How do you know what you want in life? 268 00:34:02,574 --> 00:34:07,366 Listen to your heart. Your heart will tell you what to do. 269 00:34:07,449 --> 00:34:13,033 I can't listen to my heart. It tells me things like: You like "X Factor" more than you care to admit. 270 00:34:13,116 --> 00:34:15,825 And: Consider a perm. 271 00:34:15,908 --> 00:34:20,033 I know what I want. -Oh yeah. What? 272 00:34:20,116 --> 00:34:24,116 -A girlfriend. -You're not gonna find one down here. 273 00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:27,908 -Come down here and give me a hand. -I will not come down until my demands are met. 274 00:34:27,992 --> 00:34:31,325 You'll wait a long time then. 275 00:36:14,244 --> 00:36:17,745 -What are you doing? -Accelerating the cycle of life. 276 00:36:17,828 --> 00:36:24,495 You can't just move them nearby. They have a strong homing instinct. They'll come back. I saw it on "Baywatch". 277 00:36:24,578 --> 00:36:26,578 "Spring Watch", Mother. 278 00:36:26,661 --> 00:36:30,703 -Stop following me. -No, he's going with you. 279 00:36:35,703 --> 00:36:37,995 That's my cowboy horse. 280 00:36:42,620 --> 00:36:47,454 Twenty-five. Twenty-six. Twenty seven. Twenty-eight. 281 00:36:48,662 --> 00:36:51,704 I think I'm gonna be like you when I am growing older. 282 00:36:51,787 --> 00:36:55,287 That's nice. It was a nice compliment. 283 00:36:55,371 --> 00:36:58,662 I meant sad and angry all the time, after my mom dies. 284 00:36:58,746 --> 00:37:00,496 I'm not sad and angry all the time. 285 00:37:00,579 --> 00:37:03,287 -No friends, then. I have got friends! 286 00:37:03,371 --> 00:37:06,788 Okay. Living with your nan, then. 287 00:37:06,871 --> 00:37:11,829 If you take your walkie-talkie home, we can talk at night. 288 00:37:11,913 --> 00:37:15,538 How many moles are there? -29. 289 00:38:23,831 --> 00:38:26,331 -Hi. -Hi. 290 00:38:26,415 --> 00:38:30,207 -How are you doing? -Good. -Nice bike. -Thank you. 291 00:38:30,290 --> 00:38:34,998 -How are things going? -Good, yeah good. I'm on my way to the supermarket. 292 00:38:35,082 --> 00:38:38,582 -7:30. So life is good. -So precise. 293 00:38:38,665 --> 00:38:43,582 -I don't like it when there are children there. -Naturally. Yeah. 294 00:38:43,665 --> 00:38:47,582 Anna's just gone to the bar to get us a drink. Do you wanna join us for a pint? 295 00:38:47,665 --> 00:38:52,082 No. I did not know you were with Anna. 296 00:38:52,165 --> 00:38:54,957 -Why are you being weird. -I'm not being weird. 297 00:38:55,041 --> 00:38:58,291 -Oh my God, do you like her? -No. 298 00:38:58,374 --> 00:39:01,999 -I thought you...? -You thought what? Why does everyone think I'm gay? 299 00:39:02,082 --> 00:39:05,999 I have a soft voice and I wore pink shorts once. 300 00:39:06,082 --> 00:39:08,624 Hey, Anna. 301 00:39:08,708 --> 00:39:12,208 -See you later. -Nice to see you. 302 00:39:12,291 --> 00:39:15,083 We're going to a club on Saturday! Join us! 303 00:39:18,333 --> 00:39:24,958 -I just had the weirdest conversation with Brendan. -Nothing new there. It's like the "Wickerman" in there. 304 00:39:25,041 --> 00:39:30,250 It can't be worse than being at home. Honestly I can really see why you stay around here. 305 00:39:30,333 --> 00:39:35,083 Such a cultured place. That's what dreams are all about. 306 00:39:35,167 --> 00:39:41,750 I dream of making a perfect lasagne. -That's quite an achievable dream for like seven quid. 307 00:39:41,833 --> 00:39:45,292 I did a Thai cooking class. 308 00:39:45,375 --> 00:39:49,917 I can make a Thai curry from scratch. Pad thai, egg fried rice. 309 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:54,417 Egg fried rice is Chinese. It was a real cheap cooking class. 310 00:39:58,709 --> 00:40:00,626 Anna. 311 00:40:01,459 --> 00:40:03,667 Are you there? 312 00:40:05,417 --> 00:40:08,418 Hello? Hello? 313 00:41:33,670 --> 00:41:37,170 -How long have we been doing this? -567 days. 314 00:41:37,253 --> 00:41:43,295 We'll just do the same every day. And then we die. Do you think that makes us ... 315 00:41:43,378 --> 00:41:46,545 -Like John McClane in the "Die Hard" films? -Sisyphus. 316 00:41:46,629 --> 00:41:53,337 He was condemned to repeat the same task. Pushing a rock up a mountain only to see it roll down again. Forever. 317 00:41:53,420 --> 00:41:58,629 We have to imagine we're bigger than our fate. -Blowing up this spaceship would mean that we are bigger than our fate. 318 00:41:58,712 --> 00:42:01,837 -I have no idea what you're on about. -Albert Camus' myth of Sisyphus. 319 00:42:01,921 --> 00:42:07,046 Was he a goal keeper? You need to lighten up. You need to stop listening to depressing hippie music. 320 00:42:07,129 --> 00:42:11,046 Start listening to Whitesnake. Here I go again on my own 321 00:42:11,129 --> 00:42:13,754 There, yes, my friend. 322 00:42:15,379 --> 00:42:20,296 Clint's staying here tonight. His mum's in hospital. 323 00:42:20,380 --> 00:42:23,213 Can we tidy up please? 324 00:42:23,296 --> 00:42:26,463 -Why can't he sleep in the house? -You don't. 325 00:42:28,088 --> 00:42:30,088 Is this clean? 326 00:42:32,672 --> 00:42:38,922 Is that your brother? Yeah, that is Billy. 327 00:42:39,005 --> 00:42:43,213 -Is he dead in the photo? -No! He's sun bathing. 328 00:42:43,297 --> 00:42:45,839 He looks dead. 329 00:42:47,214 --> 00:42:50,422 Was it fun being a twin? 330 00:42:58,839 --> 00:43:01,714 She finds it hard to talk about Billy. 331 00:43:01,797 --> 00:43:07,006 The sad thing is that he is dead. Not talking about him. 332 00:43:16,173 --> 00:43:18,923 -You left him alone in there? -Grow up. 333 00:43:19,006 --> 00:43:21,923 -Where's his nan? -At the hospital. 334 00:43:22,006 --> 00:43:26,798 Well where's his dad? He's doing some controlled demolition somewhere. 335 00:43:26,881 --> 00:43:30,006 I made that for him. 336 00:43:54,632 --> 00:43:58,716 Guided meditation for real men who aren't into hippie shit. 337 00:43:58,799 --> 00:44:02,049 Number 16: Sheds. 338 00:44:03,132 --> 00:44:07,591 Man! Stop what you're doing! 339 00:44:07,674 --> 00:44:11,299 This is your time. 340 00:44:13,299 --> 00:44:17,549 There's nothing you have to do now apart from friggin rest. 341 00:44:17,633 --> 00:44:22,258 Close your eyes. Noone is going to hit you. 342 00:44:23,425 --> 00:44:27,175 Imagine you're in a shed. 343 00:44:27,258 --> 00:44:32,383 A shed with adequate shelving, and nothing touching the ground where it can get damp. 344 00:44:35,925 --> 00:44:39,717 Or imagine you are building a dam in a river - 345 00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:46,092 a brilliant dam, where all the rocks fit together perfectly and no bastard water gets through. 346 00:44:47,342 --> 00:44:52,509 Tell me when I to start. -Muscle lady, designed for building dams. 347 00:44:52,592 --> 00:44:55,550 I ran out of rocks. 348 00:44:55,634 --> 00:45:02,009 There's meant to be no water getting through there, and that basically looks like most of the water is. 349 00:45:03,676 --> 00:45:06,176 I am a man of many talents. 350 00:45:06,259 --> 00:45:09,801 Take it! 351 00:45:09,884 --> 00:45:13,301 I want to do a stunt ... 352 00:45:13,384 --> 00:45:16,218 Is that you and Billy? 353 00:45:16,301 --> 00:45:20,218 Do not touch my tapes. They are precious. 354 00:45:21,384 --> 00:45:24,468 Nan made you this. 355 00:45:41,093 --> 00:45:44,718 -Have you got a teddy? -No. 356 00:45:44,802 --> 00:45:48,094 Have you got a doll or a lion? 357 00:45:52,010 --> 00:45:54,469 Pass us your pillow. 358 00:46:06,469 --> 00:46:10,928 -What was that video for? -Just fun. 359 00:46:11,011 --> 00:46:15,511 Why did the picture stop at the end? -It is not finished. 360 00:46:15,594 --> 00:46:22,553 -Are there any more? -Yeah. Loads. We had a website. 361 00:46:23,678 --> 00:46:29,803 We made videos that were bad instruction guides for coping with things in life. 362 00:46:39,220 --> 00:46:42,345 Is this Billy's? 363 00:46:42,428 --> 00:46:45,220 No, it's mine. 364 00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:50,595 -Why do you have your hair in a pot? -It is from just after he died. 365 00:46:54,220 --> 00:46:57,304 Your body is made up of millions of cells. 366 00:46:57,387 --> 00:47:03,221 I've read somewhere that all your cells are replaced after a few years. 367 00:47:03,304 --> 00:47:08,762 So every day I am less and less the person I was when I was with him. 368 00:47:08,846 --> 00:47:14,304 One day there will be nothing physically left of me from when he was here. 369 00:47:14,388 --> 00:47:18,888 -So I cut of my hair ... -Can I look at the website? 370 00:47:38,388 --> 00:47:41,097 Guided meditation for real men who aren't into hippie shit. 371 00:47:41,180 --> 00:47:44,555 Number 3: Cowboys! 372 00:47:44,638 --> 00:47:51,472 Imagine that you are on a horse, let's call it Tony. You're with your mates, and they are all straight. 373 00:47:51,555 --> 00:47:57,889 But you're drinking beer in a way that makes women want you. Gulp! Gulp! 374 00:48:09,389 --> 00:48:12,973 Where have my shoelaces gone? 375 00:48:54,349 --> 00:48:57,390 This is for you. It's God. 376 00:48:57,474 --> 00:49:01,224 Good morning. Wakey, wakey! 377 00:49:01,307 --> 00:49:04,974 Oh you're up? I've got to get you to the hospital. 378 00:49:05,057 --> 00:49:08,974 Anna, I want all this sorted. We're gonna look at a flat later. 379 00:49:09,057 --> 00:49:14,516 -I want to tell her about the boat we made at school. -Tell her about it later. She's not going anywhere. 380 00:49:14,599 --> 00:49:19,933 -I come around tonight. -Come on, I'll get you breakfast. 381 00:49:46,975 --> 00:49:50,850 We're gonna hit the sun in three days. Have you got a teddy bear? 382 00:49:50,934 --> 00:49:58,184 No. They'll give you no comfort now anyway. All teddy bears are nihilists. The question is existential or moral. 383 00:49:58,267 --> 00:50:00,725 Let's go. 384 00:50:03,934 --> 00:50:07,976 The majority have no concept of the self. so could be considered the former. 385 00:50:08,059 --> 00:50:13,393 Yogi Bear was a moral nihilist, stealing all those picnics. With no consideration of the conseqences. 386 00:50:15,768 --> 00:50:18,768 -Anna, I mean it! That won't help. 387 00:50:18,851 --> 00:50:22,143 Stop being so bloody sanctimonious. 388 00:50:23,309 --> 00:50:30,185 -What are you doing? They don't go there. -Are you moral authority on this? 389 00:50:30,268 --> 00:50:36,810 Every knows you put the mugs on the top shelf. You line them up between the prongs, not over them. 390 00:50:36,893 --> 00:50:39,893 Don't you write me a job description. 391 00:50:39,977 --> 00:50:42,810 Anna, get yourself out here right now. 392 00:50:42,893 --> 00:50:47,352 What shall I do with this? Up my ass? 393 00:50:47,435 --> 00:50:49,727 Fuck off. 394 00:50:52,102 --> 00:50:56,519 Anna, I think you should know, that despite claiming maturity, your mother... 395 00:50:56,602 --> 00:51:00,810 -just mimed the words "Fuck off" to me. 396 00:51:00,894 --> 00:51:04,519 You can't get angry with people for not behaving the way you would, Marion. 397 00:51:04,602 --> 00:51:08,311 Only a sociopath would put mugs on the lower shelf. 398 00:51:08,394 --> 00:51:11,227 I'm not talking about the dishwasher. 399 00:51:18,686 --> 00:51:21,728 Marion, don't lose them both. 400 00:51:31,145 --> 00:51:36,520 -You didn't have to do that. I'm not 9. -Stop behaving like it then. 401 00:51:36,603 --> 00:51:40,187 Can you not text and drive. My life is in your hands. 402 00:51:40,270 --> 00:51:44,062 You are assuming that I am not trying to kill you, Marion. 403 00:51:46,020 --> 00:51:49,978 Council toilet block looks salubrious by comparison. 404 00:51:50,062 --> 00:51:54,770 -You got anything else we can look at? -Not within your specifications, I'm afraid. 405 00:51:54,854 --> 00:51:58,854 -Perhaps you should consider lowering your expectations. -Or I could just give up on life completely. 406 00:51:58,937 --> 00:52:05,687 I can't imagine her bringing someone back here. Are there any woman in the world shagging less than us. 407 00:52:05,771 --> 00:52:09,062 -Do not use that word. -Fucking? 408 00:52:09,146 --> 00:52:13,354 -I cannot believe you're my mother? -Let's get a blood test. 409 00:52:13,437 --> 00:52:16,354 -Sorry. -It's all right. 410 00:52:17,396 --> 00:52:21,188 Have you thought about Brendan? He is quite hunky. 411 00:52:21,271 --> 00:52:27,313 Define hunk, Marion. I don't think anyone's been hunky since 1965. 412 00:52:27,396 --> 00:52:31,730 -Brendan is gay. -I don't think that's necessarily a problem. 413 00:52:31,813 --> 00:52:35,855 It would be healthy for you to be emotionally involved wth someone. 414 00:52:35,938 --> 00:52:39,897 Emotionally involved? Are we in "Pride and Prejudice" now? 415 00:52:39,980 --> 00:52:43,230 It would be good to develop a bond. 416 00:52:43,313 --> 00:52:49,855 -You did not give Luke a chance. -Jesus, Marion, the hairdresser? Have you gone completely mad? 417 00:52:49,938 --> 00:52:54,980 I can't stand a man who wears Ugg boots. -I thought they look quite cozy. 418 00:52:55,064 --> 00:52:58,355 Cozy? Anna does not need cozy. 419 00:52:58,439 --> 00:53:02,147 She needs a man with arms chiseled out of granite. 420 00:53:02,230 --> 00:53:04,939 that can chuck her across the bedroom. It's what all women want. 421 00:53:05,022 --> 00:53:09,356 A monosyllabic lumberjack with an artistic streak. 422 00:53:16,106 --> 00:53:21,981 -Don't put a lot on. -I'm not! I just defining your cheekbones. 423 00:53:22,064 --> 00:53:26,898 I've seen it on my tutorial. You can make really fat faces look slim. 424 00:53:26,981 --> 00:53:29,856 I haven't got a fat face. 425 00:53:29,940 --> 00:53:34,315 Deceptive. My face is five times bigger than this. 426 00:53:34,398 --> 00:53:37,731 What the hell is that? 427 00:53:38,856 --> 00:53:44,107 Clint did it. It is God as a cowboy sitting on a horse, on a cloud. 428 00:53:44,190 --> 00:53:49,773 -The kid has got issues. I like that he does stuff and is not worried about what people think. 429 00:53:49,857 --> 00:53:53,565 You mean he's a little shit. -He's not scared of messing up. 430 00:53:53,649 --> 00:53:57,024 If he wasn't 7 I'd say you have a crush on him. 431 00:53:59,940 --> 00:54:04,941 -You're kiddin?! -I need to rub it in more. 432 00:54:05,024 --> 00:54:10,774 -I look like Adam Ant. -It'll look much better at the club. 433 00:54:14,899 --> 00:54:19,899 -I feel like getting hammered. -Come on let's buy some booze. 434 00:54:19,983 --> 00:54:24,691 What? We embrace restraint whilst getting wasted. 435 00:54:24,774 --> 00:54:31,775 My challenge: If you can get a bloke to say the word "period", without meaning anything historical, 436 00:54:31,858 --> 00:54:34,233 -then you have to snog him. 437 00:54:34,316 --> 00:54:39,525 Shit. I do not have my phone. Sorry. 438 00:54:39,608 --> 00:54:42,400 Two seconds. 439 00:55:43,693 --> 00:55:47,902 It's really cold. It gonna make my nipples stand out. 440 00:55:47,985 --> 00:55:50,193 Let's have a look. 441 00:55:50,277 --> 00:55:53,110 -It didn't work. -Come on. 442 00:55:54,735 --> 00:55:58,569 Oh my God, that's my mum's hairdresser, Luke. Don't engage. 443 00:55:59,819 --> 00:56:02,485 Hi, Luke. 444 00:56:03,902 --> 00:56:08,736 -Hello. -I like your hair. Very 80s. 445 00:56:08,819 --> 00:56:11,777 Bit of double-denim for the ladies? 446 00:56:11,861 --> 00:56:16,152 If I give you money, can you get us some booze? We're having a teenage night out. 447 00:56:16,236 --> 00:56:20,528 Is it fancy-dress? You look like Mumm-Ra. 448 00:56:20,611 --> 00:56:24,861 Can you get us some booze or not? or? -You're serious? 449 00:56:24,944 --> 00:56:31,945 Get us some alcopops or cider. Something that looks radioactive. Thanks. 450 00:56:32,028 --> 00:56:37,695 I would not want him cutting my hair. You reckon he straightens his mullet? 451 01:00:37,910 --> 01:00:43,410 -What are you doing? You can't leave like that. I didn't know where you were. 452 01:00:43,493 --> 01:00:48,285 You could have told me. And that cab just cost me 40 quid. 453 01:00:48,368 --> 01:00:50,577 -40? -I know. 454 01:00:50,660 --> 01:00:53,743 I didn't think you cared as you just had your tongue down someone's throat. 455 01:00:53,827 --> 01:00:56,952 -You're still wasted. -Whose fault is that? 456 01:00:57,035 --> 01:01:02,869 Sorry for trying to give you a good night out. I been trying to make you smile again. 457 01:01:02,952 --> 01:01:05,410 Well you fucked that up, haven't you? 458 01:01:05,494 --> 01:01:12,369 -Did you lock my shed? -What? Yeah ... I can't remember. Why? 459 01:01:12,452 --> 01:01:15,327 My videos and my camera have been stolen. -Are you sure? 460 01:01:15,411 --> 01:01:20,411 -Of course I'm fucking sure! You can't have locked it. -I don't think someone's gonna take your videos. 461 01:01:20,494 --> 01:01:26,244 That just sums you up that you're so self-absorbed. It's always about you. 462 01:01:26,328 --> 01:01:32,286 Oh my God. You make out like you're the only one that knew Billy. 463 01:01:32,369 --> 01:01:35,786 -Bullshit. -You're not the only one who loved him, you know. 464 01:01:35,870 --> 01:01:40,536 Since when did you love him? You think some snog on a school trip counts? 465 01:01:40,620 --> 01:01:45,495 I'm talking about your mum and your nan. Fuck you, of course I loved him. 466 01:01:45,578 --> 01:01:47,870 Fuck you! 467 01:02:12,162 --> 01:02:16,871 Anna! May I tell you about that boat we made at school? 468 01:02:16,954 --> 01:02:21,037 -What are you wearing? -It shrunk in the wash. 469 01:02:21,121 --> 01:02:23,913 What the fuck, that's my brother's! 470 01:02:30,121 --> 01:02:32,538 -You should not swear. -You should not steal things! 471 01:02:32,621 --> 01:02:38,080 Your nan gave me that. Was your nan an astronaut? 472 01:02:38,163 --> 01:02:43,580 -Did your nan go up into space? -No. Does your mom know you're up at the crack of dawn? 473 01:02:43,663 --> 01:02:46,747 She is in hospital. 474 01:02:48,413 --> 01:02:51,872 You should get back to bed. 475 01:03:50,373 --> 01:03:52,790 Are you hung over? 476 01:03:56,373 --> 01:03:58,707 What do you think? 477 01:04:00,374 --> 01:04:03,749 It could be really nice. 478 01:04:05,707 --> 01:04:09,749 Come on, sweet heart. Is it about the jumper? 479 01:04:11,749 --> 01:04:16,249 -Anna, please don't ignore me. -Are you OK, love? 480 01:04:16,332 --> 01:04:21,166 Someone's been in my shed. My videos have been stolen. 481 01:04:21,249 --> 01:04:27,333 -You might find them if you tidied up. -Stop it! What do you want me to do, live in an empty box? 482 01:04:27,416 --> 01:04:31,666 -This is a lovely empty box, Brendan, thank you. -You're welcome. 483 01:04:54,917 --> 01:04:58,583 -You coming, love? -I'm gonna go for a walk. 484 01:05:05,417 --> 01:05:09,917 I'm thinking of quitting. It's not really for me. 485 01:05:10,000 --> 01:05:12,751 You are not very good at it. 486 01:05:12,834 --> 01:05:16,417 -What are you looking at? It was "love" written on the pavement 487 01:05:16,501 --> 01:05:20,459 I took a picture of it, but now I can't find it. 488 01:05:22,376 --> 01:05:26,251 Maybe you are looking in the wrong place. -I'm not. 489 01:05:34,126 --> 01:05:38,085 How is your period? 490 01:05:41,710 --> 01:05:45,043 Don't ask that? Why would I say that? 491 01:05:45,126 --> 01:05:48,710 I said it because Fiona told me to ask you. She thought you'd be impressed. 492 01:05:48,793 --> 01:05:53,793 But it felt wrong, instinctively. I hate Fiona. 493 01:05:54,710 --> 01:05:57,835 Fiona is your worst mate! 494 01:06:06,794 --> 01:06:11,085 This is Fiona's voice mail. Leave a message. 495 01:06:11,169 --> 01:06:14,336 -Don't you fucking dare! -What's going on? 496 01:06:14,419 --> 01:06:18,919 If these are broken, I will fucking kill you. These are really fucking expensive! 497 01:06:19,002 --> 01:06:22,711 -Everything I ever had, she just broke it. -You psycho bitch! 498 01:06:22,794 --> 01:06:27,128 I'm taking the cost of that laminator out of your wages. 499 01:06:27,211 --> 01:06:33,086 You always insisted on laminating everything. She laminated my degrees. 500 01:06:33,169 --> 01:06:37,628 -Laminate this. -If you stay around here, you turn into that. 501 01:06:37,711 --> 01:06:42,920 -You know if you shat yourself, you'd blame it on someone else. 502 01:06:43,003 --> 01:06:46,878 You laminated pictures of Robert Pattinson. 503 01:06:46,961 --> 01:06:51,587 It was not Robert Pattinson! -Why did you need it laminated? That is vile! 504 01:06:51,670 --> 01:06:54,212 What are you getting on it? Fluids?! 505 01:06:54,295 --> 01:06:59,337 -I laminated it for her. -What? I do not like Robert Pattinson. 506 01:06:59,420 --> 01:07:04,295 It was not Robert fucking Pattinson! -All right! 507 01:07:04,379 --> 01:07:09,379 Should have known you two were in this together. Get you and your diseased vagina out of my house! 508 01:08:22,464 --> 01:08:25,756 -Are you OK? -They have killed them. 509 01:08:25,839 --> 01:08:32,423 Humanely though, with these tablets that turn into gas. They don't feel anything. 510 01:08:33,589 --> 01:08:39,090 They are not in those traps. The traps are only if it doesn't work. 511 01:08:39,173 --> 01:08:44,298 -So they're just dead underneath this? -They were undermining the foundations. 512 01:08:44,381 --> 01:08:48,423 So I'll go walking around on dead moles every day at work now? 513 01:08:50,507 --> 01:08:54,673 -Are you OK? -No. Everyone is angry with me. 514 01:08:54,757 --> 01:09:00,590 -Because you don't like the flats? -No cause I turn 30 in 2 days, and I live in a shed. 515 01:09:00,673 --> 01:09:04,590 And I make videos with my thumbs. 516 01:09:04,674 --> 01:09:11,215 -You're weird, aren't you?. I like it. -Noone wants to be liked for being weird, Brendan. 517 01:09:11,299 --> 01:09:14,799 I can objectify you, if you want. 518 01:09:14,882 --> 01:09:22,049 I like your pale skin, your messy hair and your smooth forehead. 519 01:09:22,132 --> 01:09:27,508 -Are you doing an inventory? -Sometimes it helps to apply logic to emotional situations. 520 01:09:27,591 --> 01:09:33,424 I once did a cost-benefit analysis of a relationship, to see if it was worth pursuing. 521 01:09:33,508 --> 01:09:36,758 She dumped me before I could finish it. 522 01:09:37,799 --> 01:09:41,050 -She? -For fuck's sake, I'm not gay! 523 01:09:41,133 --> 01:09:45,258 I like girls. Like you. Weird girls. 524 01:09:45,341 --> 01:09:49,216 But you always used to throw pebbles at me when we were walking home from school. 525 01:09:49,300 --> 01:09:52,258 Yes, because I wanted to fuck you. 526 01:09:55,467 --> 01:09:57,675 Do it now. 527 01:09:57,758 --> 01:10:00,508 Do it now. 528 01:10:00,592 --> 01:10:02,592 Here. 529 01:10:16,176 --> 01:10:18,634 No. 530 01:10:24,759 --> 01:10:28,343 Where are you going? Are you okay? 531 01:11:18,427 --> 01:11:20,052 Clint. 532 01:11:21,594 --> 01:11:26,469 You come for bed now. I've got a nice story for you. 533 01:11:50,053 --> 01:11:52,095 What? 534 01:13:34,514 --> 01:13:38,139 Don't go crackers, Marion. Keep a lid on it. 535 01:13:38,223 --> 01:13:41,598 What on earth is going on? 536 01:13:41,681 --> 01:13:45,015 Anna! 537 01:13:45,098 --> 01:13:48,765 Calm down, Marion. I'm calm. 538 01:13:48,848 --> 01:13:51,848 -Anna. -What's up? 539 01:13:51,931 --> 01:13:56,223 What do you mean? Nothing, everything is fine. Perfectly normal. 540 01:13:56,307 --> 01:13:59,515 I just fancied sleeping in a tent. 541 01:13:59,598 --> 01:14:03,265 Get out! Bloody, get out! 542 01:14:03,348 --> 01:14:06,557 -Let go, mum. -No, you let go! 543 01:14:06,640 --> 01:14:10,140 Will you just stop it! 544 01:14:10,224 --> 01:14:13,765 -I have had enough. -Can I tell you about that boat? 545 01:14:13,849 --> 01:14:17,807 Morning. Somebody's special day tomorrow? 546 01:14:17,891 --> 01:14:20,724 Get out of the way. 547 01:14:20,807 --> 01:14:24,266 -Mum! -Marion! Stop it. 548 01:14:24,349 --> 01:14:28,016 I've had enough of this. 549 01:14:28,099 --> 01:14:30,433 Get out! 550 01:14:35,349 --> 01:14:37,683 Oh my God. 551 01:14:37,766 --> 01:14:40,891 -Anna? -I can feel them. 552 01:14:44,308 --> 01:14:48,433 -What are you doing? There's spiders on me. 553 01:14:48,516 --> 01:14:52,266 -Go inside, Clint. -I need to tell her about that boat. 554 01:14:52,350 --> 01:14:55,142 -Not now, sweetheart. -It is important. 555 01:14:55,225 --> 01:14:58,683 Fine, fine. Show me the fucking boat! 556 01:15:03,892 --> 01:15:06,434 You little thief! 557 01:15:06,517 --> 01:15:09,559 This stuff makes you look ridiculous! 558 01:15:09,642 --> 01:15:13,142 What's happened to your hair, darling? -She did it! 559 01:15:13,225 --> 01:15:17,100 No, I didn't. -Yes, it's in your box. 560 01:15:20,517 --> 01:15:23,976 I knew you were sad and angry all the time! 561 01:15:24,059 --> 01:15:28,809 Maybe I didn't want to tell you that what's happening to your mum, will fuck up your life - 562 01:15:28,892 --> 01:15:32,351 -and you will never be happy again! 563 01:16:16,435 --> 01:16:18,477 What's up with you? 564 01:16:19,644 --> 01:16:21,727 Nothing. 565 01:16:21,811 --> 01:16:23,894 Okay. 566 01:16:25,686 --> 01:16:28,519 I want to be alone. 567 01:16:28,602 --> 01:16:31,269 You are alone. 568 01:16:33,353 --> 01:16:37,728 Can something exist elsewhere after it's stopped existing here? 569 01:16:37,811 --> 01:16:41,853 -Like a parallel universe? -Like a website. 570 01:16:41,936 --> 01:16:44,020 I don't know. 571 01:16:44,103 --> 01:16:50,061 -Are there parallel universes? -They don't know what's out there. 572 01:16:50,145 --> 01:16:54,687 I know one thing that is not out there. -What is it? 573 01:16:55,770 --> 01:16:58,145 Me. 574 01:17:03,020 --> 01:17:06,854 Hello. I was just calling on you. 575 01:17:09,312 --> 01:17:11,520 What are you reading? 576 01:17:12,812 --> 01:17:16,312 It's a pact me and Billy made. 577 01:17:16,395 --> 01:17:22,396 We were forming an alliance to last for decades, then we were going to meet up in our 70, and kill each other. 578 01:17:22,479 --> 01:17:26,021 -That's sweet. -Yeah... 579 01:17:26,104 --> 01:17:28,771 I should go home. 580 01:17:30,146 --> 01:17:32,771 I brought this for you. 581 01:17:33,979 --> 01:17:39,229 I was gonna get you flowers, but I was worried they'd die, so... 582 01:17:39,313 --> 01:17:42,313 -Brendan. -Yes. 583 01:17:44,313 --> 01:17:48,480 Am I still a twin if my twin's dead? 584 01:17:55,647 --> 01:17:58,022 Technically... 585 01:17:59,230 --> 01:18:01,855 ... I don't think so. No. 586 01:18:31,981 --> 01:18:34,023 Mum? 587 01:18:35,273 --> 01:18:37,439 Mum? 588 01:19:10,482 --> 01:19:13,315 You have one new message. 589 01:19:14,607 --> 01:19:16,732 First new message. 590 01:19:16,815 --> 01:19:23,191 Anna, Clint's been missing all day. We need to find him. 591 01:19:23,274 --> 01:19:26,441 We're all out looking for him. 592 01:19:34,774 --> 01:19:36,858 Clint. 593 01:19:38,649 --> 01:19:40,899 Clint? 594 01:19:42,649 --> 01:19:44,441 Clint. 595 01:19:45,525 --> 01:19:48,066 Can you hear me, mate? 596 01:19:57,442 --> 01:20:00,650 Clint. Can you hear me? 597 01:21:13,652 --> 01:21:15,694 Clint! 598 01:21:21,527 --> 01:21:23,777 Clint? 599 01:21:26,486 --> 01:21:28,194 Clint! 600 01:21:40,986 --> 01:21:43,236 Clint! 601 01:21:48,445 --> 01:21:50,653 Clint! 602 01:22:03,403 --> 01:22:05,695 Clint! 603 01:22:11,487 --> 01:22:13,904 Clint! 604 01:22:27,071 --> 01:22:29,112 Clint! 605 01:22:36,863 --> 01:22:38,904 Clint! 606 01:23:22,739 --> 01:23:26,947 I've really fucked up. -Because you've shrunk my jumper? 607 01:23:29,781 --> 01:23:32,281 -I thought he'd be here? -He'll come. 608 01:23:32,364 --> 01:23:35,864 What if he doesn't? 609 01:23:35,948 --> 01:23:39,656 -What if something's happened, it'd be all my fault. -Don't be daft! 610 01:23:39,739 --> 01:23:46,364 I said some really shit things to him. I just want to say that I'm sorry, but I don't know how. 611 01:23:46,448 --> 01:23:49,656 -Yeah, you do. -No, I don't. 612 01:23:49,740 --> 01:23:52,448 Yeah, you do. 613 01:23:54,865 --> 01:23:57,406 No, i don't. 614 01:24:04,490 --> 01:24:07,240 Who are you talking to? 615 01:24:09,907 --> 01:24:13,449 -Noone! -What are you looking at, then? 616 01:24:15,240 --> 01:24:17,615 Nothing. 617 01:24:17,699 --> 01:24:20,365 Ask him. 618 01:24:20,449 --> 01:24:23,949 Go on. This is your chance. 619 01:24:25,866 --> 01:24:31,532 -I don't want to. -No, but you will. 620 01:24:44,533 --> 01:24:47,700 I need you to blow up my shed. 621 01:24:49,783 --> 01:24:51,950 Allright then. 622 01:24:53,033 --> 01:24:56,450 -Can I tell you about the boat now? -Yeah. 623 01:25:01,325 --> 01:25:04,783 There was this man who made a boat. 624 01:25:04,867 --> 01:25:10,367 He kept sailing it and sailing it. Every time he sailed it, it got old, it keeps breaking. 625 01:25:10,450 --> 01:25:13,950 He keeps getting new bits, every time it breaks. 626 01:25:14,034 --> 01:25:18,867 Then one day he realized, there is nothing left of the old boat. There was only new bits. 627 01:25:18,950 --> 01:25:23,575 He thought in his head, if it was the same boat. 628 01:25:23,659 --> 01:25:26,909 -So what's the answer? -There isn't one. 629 01:25:26,992 --> 01:25:30,451 It's one of them questions that you have to think about. 630 01:25:31,534 --> 01:25:34,742 -What do you think? -I do not know. 631 01:25:38,076 --> 01:25:40,534 Is that your dam? 632 01:25:42,076 --> 01:25:45,159 -Yeah. -It is rubbish. 633 01:25:46,409 --> 01:25:48,410 Cheers. 634 01:25:50,035 --> 01:25:52,035 I got you this. 635 01:25:52,118 --> 01:25:55,618 Can I have his bike instead? 636 01:25:59,660 --> 01:26:01,743 Right, let's get you across. 637 01:27:45,913 --> 01:27:49,580 I know what I wanna do for my birthday. 638 01:27:49,663 --> 01:27:52,746 I want Clint to blow up my shed. 639 01:27:52,830 --> 01:27:55,038 Sorry. 640 01:28:30,747 --> 01:28:33,414 You alright? 641 01:28:40,331 --> 01:28:44,706 Anna. There is a young man here to see you. 642 01:28:46,831 --> 01:28:49,498 I'll leave you to it. 643 01:28:57,456 --> 01:29:00,165 You can come in. 644 01:29:02,498 --> 01:29:05,123 Nice shed. 645 01:29:06,748 --> 01:29:12,832 It looks like Stanley Kubrik boxes. He used to keep everything from his films in boxes. 646 01:29:12,915 --> 01:29:16,582 Like meticulously. All sorts of shit. 647 01:29:16,665 --> 01:29:20,457 People said, it was a sign of his genius, so ... 648 01:29:21,874 --> 01:29:26,541 Let's just hope it doesn't mean you fuck up your next film by denying the audience what they want. 649 01:29:26,624 --> 01:29:31,332 What do they want? -To see Nicole Kidman's chumba-wumbas. 650 01:29:33,999 --> 01:29:39,708 Did you actually just laugh at something I said? And there was noone here to witness it. 651 01:29:39,791 --> 01:29:42,333 That is annoying! 652 01:29:43,458 --> 01:29:46,833 -I've got you a present. -It's not a deformed carrot, is it? 653 01:29:46,916 --> 01:29:48,416 No, it's not a deformed carrot. 654 01:30:06,208 --> 01:30:07,792 Thank you. 655 01:30:58,168 --> 01:31:00,418 Congratulations. 656 01:32:37,796 --> 01:32:44,363 == Subs by Sub*Sequenta ==