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Hey, guys. Tonight is the Purge...
and I want all of my white friends to be safe.
Rules of the Purge. You have 12 hours...
to do any crime you want against anyone you want.
You can shoot, kill, stab.
Twelve hours of death, mayhem.
Lock your doors. Protect yourself.
Make sure your rent is paid...
and all of your pets are put up.
But the most important rule of all...
stay tight, stay white...
and this is only gonna last one night.
Let the games begin.
All right, I wasn't gonna do this, but forget it.
Here goes nothing.
This is a story about the worst day of my life.
Well, one of them.
See, I was wiring shit,
car stereos, alarms, you name it.
Don't Hate Wiring, that's my company.
And that's me, Carl Black.
You see this ugly cat right here?
That's Key Flo, a big-time drug dealer.
One day while working on his alarm...
Key Flo got busted.
They took his ass far away.
What they didn't know was in his house was a lot of money.
So I took it as a payment for all the work I did.
With a payday like this...
it was time to move.
Well, I did owe a few people in Chicago a few things...
but no one's tripping.
So I loaded up the family and got the hell out of Chicago.
Leaving Chicago before the Purge...
was the greatest thing I ever done.
I met this cool dude on the Internet...
who helped us qualify for this big-ass house in Beverly Hills.
I might've falsified a few things...
but, hey, this is for my family.
Those are my kids.
My son Carl Jr. thinks he's a damn vampire.
Think again, buddy.
And this dummy with this do-rag?
That's my little cousin Cronut.
He went to jail for some parking tickets...
and now he think he's a gangster.
Ride my mustache.
That's my beautiful wife.
Did I mention the greatest thing about my move?
Rich people don't purge.
Getting the hell out of Chicago...
was the best thing ever.
Well, here's how the worst day started.
Hey, come on, man!
Hey, how you doing, sir?
- You lost? - I beg your pardon?
Man, you gotta be. Check this out.
Go right down here, make a U-turn...
then you can pull right out, and you'll get back...
to wherever it is you need to get to.
- I live here. - No. No, I'm serious, man.
I live right there at Cherry Blossom.
- I'm Carl Black. - Black?
You said Carl Black?
I just moved from Chicago.
Man, listen, I'm gonna be real with you, man.
Don't no niggas live here, man.
I'm the nigga that living here!
I'm the new nigga that living here, all right?
Save me some trouble, man.
We've been having all these break-ins and the rappers dance, loud mus... rims.
Come on, man. Look at you, man.
You can't live here, man. Go on and make...
Don't fucking try to play me like this!
I live here! I'm fucking crazy!
Look at my eye right here.
- Forest Whitaker eye. - Okay, you're right. I see.
I found it. You're right.
Carl Black. Right here. Carl Black.
- You said I can go? - My bad, man.
Thank you, brother.
Have a nice day, man. I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry. - Bitch.
Please don't tell me your ass is in California.
Don't call my phone no more.
You told me you were going to the store!
- I'm married now. - You're married?
You keep blowing up... Look, you pissing me off...
to the highest of "pisstivity."
"Pisstivity" ain't even a word, dumbass.
Shoranda, I don't wanna be over at your house...
with all them kids over there smelling like urine.
I know you didn't just say that about my kids.
You bitch, nigga!
Come out! Come to me!
Everybody is gonna come in your house...
they're gonna fuck you!
I've traveled a long way to find you.
Hey! Caesar!
Don't try to play me.
You're Carl Black from Chicago, right?
Yeah, and you're Caesar from The Planet of the Apes, right?
Do I look like a fucking joke to you?
- Yeah. - Consider yourself served.
Hey, man! Don't hit me with no... don't do that!
Don't do that.
You're harassing me.
You're at my mansion. I'm in Beverly Hills.
No, don't do that.
If you didn't do nothing wrong, if you was a perfect human being...
none of this shit would happen.
- I wouldn't have to be here. - I ain't did nothing wrong!
You're racial profiling me!
You're too black to profile another black person.
- What's wrong? - "Do I think you're black"?
Look at me and look at you!
- We are both black people. - You are black as fuck.
What the fuck? Don't say that.
Don't put that Ebola finger in my face.
- No... - Look at your feet.
What the fuck is wrong with my feet?
You think this shit is a game?
You fucking redbone bitch...
don't ever disrespect my feet like that again.
- I'm not disrespecting you. - Yes, you are...
and it's because of your company...
that Don't Hate Wiring...
that has destroyed the best restaurant...
- No, don't... - Not just restaurant.
African restaurant in the city of Chicago!
Who else have you fucked up?
I done wired all these different houses.
I'm from the hood. I made it out of there.
We wired Bishop Tutu's hut.
We wired Idi Amin's bathroom.
So get on out of here, man.
You're very disrespectful.
- Well, you bitch nigga. - No, you're a bitch nigga.
And whatever container you came in...
and whatever trunk they smuggled your black ass in...
take your ass back.
Hey, who are you talking to?
- Bitch. - Hey!
- Don't touch! - Throw them keys again.
Don't touch me! Hey, my hand!
Fuck you, you redbone bitch.
- Fuck you. - You haven't made it yet...
you punk-bitch nigga.
Your mother's dick is bigger than yours.
You're the only nigga in this neighborhood...
that is still on welfare.
Yes, I Googled you.
Get the fuck off the door.
Don't worry, Lestat.
We will teach them all!
As the purging descends...
the vampires will take their rightful place...
as the leaders of the... shit!
Man.
- What the fuck! - Intruder! Intruder!
- Punk-ass alert. - What the hell is that?
Punk-ass alert.
- Yeah. - Carl's Jr., get this shit out of here!
Carl's Jr.!
I'll bite your neck.
Little bad motherfucker.
I'm getting rid of these damn kids.
Is anybody here?
I mean, we done really came up.
We in a mansion, girl.
- Damn, girl! - I know!
Girl, what your daddy do to leave Chicago?
I don't know what my father's doing but he done did something really, really dope.
Baby!
Tell me about your husband. Your husband play football?
Well, my baby owns an electronic wiring company...
and he just landed this huge account.
That's why we're here.
And what he does is he goes to people's houses...
he wires people's cars...
and he just landed this amazing new client.
That's why we can live here.
- How long you been here? - Girl, three days.
What do you do all day...
Ming, I take care of his kids.
- You see this house? - Hey.
Hey, baby!
Damn, you haven't finished unpacking?
You're out here getting your nails done...
and looking all good and...
- And what's going on? - I'm getting a manicure.
- Plum wine. - You're looking good, too.
Lord, Jesus! Baby.
All for you, my love.
Good lord, give me some of that Chinese...
My fault. I'm sorry, I can't play a little bit?
- Stop playing. - She wanted a nigga.
She's my new friend.
- Leave her alone. - I know, I know.
- I'm just kidding. - Stop playing.
- He lie. He lie. - I know he's lying.
- I know him. - These manicure hoes is on me now.
You know what I'm saying? That's what I'm talking about.
All he does is jack off all day.
Okay, Carl. Carl, I'm gonna need you...
to turn around really slowly...
because you don't believe when I tell you this.
- You see this tongue. - He is so gross.
Ride my mustache.
- Ride... Oh, shit! - Cronut!
- Baby, that's not right. - Did he have his little nuts out...
- just there in the window? - No, his tongue was enough.
It's just wrong, baby. I don't...
He's probably smelling your panties in there...
- lying around the house. - Oh, lord.
Man, hide your underwear around the bedroom. Shit.
- Are you gonna answer that? - Yeah, I got it.
Yeah, this might be... Oh, that ain't nothing.
- Carl, pick up your phone. - What?
I can't answer the phone.
Ain't nothing but my friends from Chicago.
- What friends from Chicago? - A bunch of drug dealers...
and all kind of crazy motherfuckers...
baby mamas, I can't answer the phone.
- That's why I moved out here. - Okay, all done!
- Okay, Ming, I just need one more thing. - $100.
$100. $100... what?
Oh, tonight Purge!
Killing, death.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait. Purge? - Killing.
- I need to go home. - Carl.
People keep saying Pur... We in Beverly Hills.
This is a gated community.
We've got security. We don't have no Purge problems.
Not tonight. Need to go home.
- 100, please. - Yeah.
- 100 in what? - $100.
It's a Purge coming.
Ain't nothing you can do with no $100.
- Once the Purge comes... - Carl, cash, money!
Just pay her the $100, please, baby.
- $100. Let me handle this. - Ming.
Ming, listen to me.
Pay me cash!
I told you that I was gonna pay you in credit.
Credit is king in America, okay?
Pay me in cash, or I purge your ass tonight, bitch.
- Come on, you done disrespecting me. - What the hell?
Just pay her.
- You said you were rich. - I tried to give you a chance...
but you disrespected me.
Get your ass out of here, both of y'all.
I'm gonna fuck your wife! I'm gonna crush her pussy!
Back up, Wesley Snipes and his new wife.
What? Who is that African man?
Wesley Snipes.
He just got out of jail. You didn't hear...
- Carl. - I ain't gotta play.
- Baby. - Stop.
Come on. Don't do that. I can't do it.
- Come on. - Can't do what?
- What is the deal? - Who was that man?
I don't know who they was.
They's people from my past, okay?
It wasn't Wesley Snipes, though.
I mean, he was black as hell like him, but it wasn't him.
Carl, the only thing I need to know from you right now...
I swear you better not lie.
- Do we have this money? - We got the money.
Look, your ass is standing in a big-ass mansion.
I bought you a brand-new car.
What the hell? What are you worried about?
I'm worried about how you got it.
What did you do to get it?
Okay, what did I do?
I did a little dancing in Atlanta.
Male gigoloing.
Did something strange for a little piece of change.
No. No, for real.
Look, I got a chain of Wing and Things that I landed.
That's what I'm doing. I'm going around
hooking up wiring all over from here to San Diego.
Baby, I want to believe you...
but I can't keep uprooting this family...
in the middle of the night again.
I can't do that, okay? These kids need to trust me.
They need to believe that we're in a family...
that we're a unit, that they're secure.
- I don't feel that right now. - Babe, the kids do trust you.
They hate me, Carl.
The kids don't hate you.
No, they don't. You guys just need to get to know each other a little bit.
- I'm trying. - And I know that you're getting upset.
It's irritating you to see little Carl Jr...
running around here with a little Batman outfit...
with his little ass cheeks cut out.
- It's a vampire. - Okay, a vampire outfit.
And Allie's running around with Mr. Frosty...
- whoever the fuck he is. - His name is Freeze.
Yeah, I'ma freeze his ass. That's what I'ma do.
Please trust me on this.
- I have trusted you. - Well, keep trusting me, then.
We got the Wings and Things...
we got the house, we got the car.
Look, let's enjoy this.
- You living the life. - Okay.
I'm gonna believe you.
- Believe me. - Bye-bye.
Carl Black!
And you are Mexican and black.
- Carl, goodbye. - I'll be right back, all right?
We interrupt our program...
to bring you this important message.
As everyone knows, tonight is the Purge.
- Oh, my God. - And you know why we gotta purge.
First of all...
for all of you who keep thieving...
killing, selling drugs that we can't tax...
for all you who ain't paying your child support...
but just bought a brand-new Xbox and some Jordans.
I'm talking to bankers making a cool million...
each time you sneeze...
while the public can't afford to pay the mortgages...
that you sold them.
So tonight, as Americans...
we purge.
Hey, if you ain't done nothing wrong...
you got nothing to worry about.
Purge ain't about you.
It's about the rest of you.
And you know who you are.
Good thing we're in Beverly Hills.
Yeah.
Knock, knock.
Yeah!
They gonna love this back in Chicago.
Somebody's got to do it.
Yeah, we're in the money!
We got money!
Where'd you get all this money from?
- Damn, girl! - Hold on, hold on, girl.
- Hold on. - All right.
What?
Who is this?
Hey, girl, let me call you back.
You better call Freezee. You know he be tripping.
- All right. - Love you, girl.
All right, love you, too. Bye!
Bye!
This is some dumb shit.
Big Sean!
Oh, nigga, I thought you was Big Sean.
Freezee!
What are you doing here? You scared me half to death.
You know I couldn't be in Chicago without you, baby.
I'm rich.
If you say you're my friend, you're my friend!
Baby, stop. My dad!
Baby, how did you get here?
- You don't have a car. - Baby, with love like ours...
I don't need a car. I took the Greyhound.
- You took the Greyhound? - Three days and three nights...
just like Jesus Christ did in the desert with Moses...
Adam and Eve. "Holy-lujah."
Baby.
Oh, my God. If Dad catches you here...
you know he's gonna kill you.
Look, I'ma take my chances with your dad.
Matter of fact, it might be nice to see him.
- Pop him one time. - What?
- Call him "pop" one time. - Stop it.
- Pop that nigga one time. - Baby, stop it.
- Allie Black! - I've been going to church for you.
Well, then why did Keisha say...
you was with that thot Valerie last night, then?
- Keisha be talking bullshit! - Nah.
You can't be believing Keisha, man.
Baby, I love you. Look at me, look at me.
Repeat after me, baby. I...
- I. - Love.
- Sex.
I knew you wanted the D, baby.
- Let me get it one time from the back. - Allie!
Bet you didn't think I'd be participating tonight.
Purge?
They're still on that shit?
But your president is a man of the people.
And like you, I got the urge to purge.
Purge these nuts.
It's going down, y'all.
Jay Leno, you got a lot of cars.
Pick a fast one, motherfucker.
Allie, the TV's fucked up again.
Hey, nigga! Fuck you, nigga!
Shut the fuck up, nigga.
Hold on, you ain't gonna be treating me like no side bitch.
Baby, please, please. You're gonna get me in trouble!
- You're gonna get me in... - Allie!
Say, "Fuck you, Dad," and then make me a sandwich.
- Make me a sandwich. - Okay, I'll make you...
a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
- Allie! - All right, Daddy, I'm coming!
All right, Daddy, fuck you!
- I said it in your voice. - Shut up!
Allie Black!
- What's up, Daddy? - Don't you hear me calling you?
I'm trying to... What are you doing?
- Nothing. - ...no place that you are safe.
I'm trying to get this TV working.
It's on some bullshit.
Well, dang, Daddy, ain't this what you do for a living?
Yeah, but I didn't wire this shit up.
Some white man wired this up.
This ain't nigga-rigged.
Hey, you know what would be great? Two birds with one stone?
If you could hide in Erik Estrada's house.
Everything on here is the Purge.
- I know. - You ain't gonna be able...
to watch nothing else today.
It's the government, the Purge.
All right, well, we ain't scared of no damn Purge.
- We're from Cook County. - What?
We grew up on food stamps. That's the Purge.
- Shit. - We know this life.
- First and 15. - What?
- Nigga. - Yeah.
- Fix the TV. - All right.
Arnold Schwarzenegger, I'ma be out there.
Let me get this call.
- So go do it now. - Hello?
I'm gonna take this for myself, bitch.
- He called me down here for nothing. - I live in Beverly Hills now.
I don't live in Chicago.
Locating enemy target.
Target locked.
Carl's Jr., stop it!
Junior, you get that out of here!
Holy shit!
You know what?
Carl needs me.
He needs me to take all this.
Thank you. Just take all this little money.
And all this weed in the house. We got kids in here.
Cronut!
Freezee, you can't stay here.
- You... - What you mean?
- Look, you gotta go. - Where am I supposed to go?
I don't know, but you can't stay here, nigga.
- You gotta go. - It's sundown, baby.
I'll get my ass purged quick.
Baby, I've seen it.
- They purge niggas like me quick. - I don't wanna get you purged.
Well, then... I mean, what...
- Come on. - My dad, man.
I'll handle your dad. Let me stay.
Please let me stay. Come on.
Do it for us. Let me put the tip in.
Let me stay. Pick one or the other.
All right. Okay.
- Okay, I can smash? - No!
You can stay, but you... Baby, listen to me.
You have to be quiet. My dad don't play that shit.
Baby, you gotta be quiet 'cause you know when I lay it down...
- Okay, okay, okay. - Shut up.
45, 47.
- Carl? - What's up?
- We need to talk. - I thought we already talked.
- Where's the kids? - Cronut's disgusting.
- Cronut? - Allie and Carl's Jr. both hate me.
- I don't know what to do, Carl. - Come on, just have a seat.
Come on, come on, come on, relax.
Just talk to me. What is the deal?
I can't live in this house...
knowing that there is a man fully masturbating to me.
There's a tent coming up in his pants every time I'm around.
Okay, okay, look. Cronut, he been in jail.
He's been in prison. He's a little weird.
- But let me control that, okay? - When?
I'm gonna get ahold of his little ass. Relax.
Let me get the little leprechaun in my possession.
- Kick his ass out. - Look, I'ma go talk to Cronut...
and we're gonna have a family meeting.
We're gonna get together. Let's...
Let me handle it, okay?
- Okay. Okay. - All right.
- Thank you. - Okay, baby.
All right, let me go talk to Allie.
I gotta find a way to make this family work.
Shit.
Cronut!
Cronut.
Don't be playing around, Cronut.
Yeah, you see this? You see it?
You ride my mustache.
Ride my mustache.
Don't act like you don't... Don't act.
- What are you doing? - Come on, cuz. We cousins.
- Don't be scaring me like that. - I asked you to come out here, man...
and look at my SUV, man...
and change the oil. What the fuck is this?
I was trying to change the oil, man...
but the oil's so gooky and shit...
it's like dried-up nut. I can't do that.
I don't need no little shade tree mechanic running around here.
If you don't know what you're doing, take my shit to Midas.
I do know what I'm doing.
It's made me come up with great ideas.
- A great idea like what? - A million-dollar idea.
- A million-dollar idea? - Yeah.
- With brand-new SUV? - Brand-new?
It was brand-new when civil rights movement was going on.
It's a one owner.
One owner? Who was the one owner, Jesus?
Nah, man! A white lady had it in her garage...
- and never drove it. - Was it Driving Miss Daisy?
What's that little bolt right there?
- Which one? - Goddamn mouth.
- What's with you, bro? - Talking about my shit ain't brand-new.
- Man, you need counseling, bro. - You do, too.
No, I don't. You do, man.
'Cause I got great ideas. I'm trying to help you out...
make this situation better for both of us...
'cause I got this great idea. Let me tell you about it, man.
All right, hear me out, bro.
Here's what I'm thinking. These models are notorious...
for having electrical problems that start fire.
So what I'm thinking is speeding up the process.
That way, this bitch explodes...
- you feel what I'm saying? - Yeah.
If it explodes...
we get a new model, and a big settlement.
And if I get a big settlement, boom!
So you think you're gonna get a settlement for blowing up in this truck?
- If I'm in it. - You're gonna blow up?
I'm not gonna blow all the way up.
I'm not gonna die, that'd be stupid.
All I'm gonna do is just burn my whole front of my body.
Like you know how Kunta Kinte's back is?
That's how the front of my chest's gonna look...
Dumb as a box of fucking rocks.
You got a bad bitch now...
No, no, no, no. And speaking of a bad bitch...
stop fucking with my wife around here.
No, for real. Stop jacking off to her...
- stop watching her. - Who told you? They snitching on me?
No, she told me. You've been running around here...
with your little dinkle out and stuff.
- Cut it out! - Did she tell you she don't like you...
'cause you look like Lionel Richie?
I don't look like no fucking Lionel Richie.
- Yes, you do. - No, I don't look like Lionel Richie.
You gotta look at it from my point of view.
I've been locked up for two years now.
I know. I put money on your fucking books.
So I haven't seen nobody that fine... I ain't seen no woman.
- All I've been seeing is dick. - Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Like, I mean, like, them niggas...
- Them niggas in jail got big-ass dicks. - I don't wanna hear that shit!
We in shower, they swinging dick everywhere.
Shit missed and bumped me in my elbow...
- and I was on the other side of the room. - Okay, enough.
Enough with other men. That too much.
Well, let me fuck your old lady. I won't talk about 'em no more.
What did I just say about you, Cronut?
You think it's a fucking game. Stop playing.
- All right. - We're having a family meeting...
in 10 minutes.
Get my truck, put back the fuck together...
- and get in there on the meeting. - All right.
Take that black curtain rod off your head.
- No, I got wave caps. - That ain't a wave cap.
- I'm trying to get waves. - Them is fingerprints in your head.
No, this is nice waves.
Yes, boss. I's-a getting to it.
Treat me like I'm a goddamn slave.
I'm your peoples!
Now, this is a family meeting for the Blacks.
Now, I'm a little upset...
that you guys haven't been appreciative...
of this big mansion that I put you in.
You know I'm grateful.
You don't get no more "gratefu-ker" than me.
Kids, I did all this, guys, for you.
Well, Daddy, we didn't ask for this.
- You need to get Ray Rice. - Carl, do you see...
- Cronut, shut the fuck up. - Yes, Your Highness.
I've been trying to get this Wings and Things account...
so that I can give you guys a better life...
so I can put some smiling faces on your face.
All right, how about a smile?
Listen, we are here to have a good time.
No iPhones, no iPads.
- What? - Put that shit down.
- We're rich... - Rich.
We're black, and we're going for a walk.
You guys couldn't even walk in Chicago...
- Let's go. - Listen to what the man's saying!
- You heard Father. - Let's go.
I got this. Oh, never mind.
I was just...
Damn, this is nice.
We gotta meet some friends around here.
Oh, no, no, no.
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony and Kim Kardashian.
Not in my neighborhood.
911. The janitor speaking.
Yeah, I'd like to report a suspicious black family in my gated community.
Give me your address...
They're just walking down the street.
Free for everyone to see.
They probably have weapons of mass destruction.
The little one looks like an evil overlord.
Can you please send someone, please?
Hello? Hello!
Babe, let's just go back to the house.
They don't wanna walk.
Come on, let's enjoy this.
We in Beverly Hills. Look how nice this neighborhood is.
Smell the fresh air.
It's nice, right?
- Oh, man, damn. - This is dumb.
Don't try to take my side either, okay...
because I still don't know you like that.
Hey, hey, hey, watch your mouth now.
Daddy, that's not my mother.
I don't have to listen to her.
My mother died, okay? That's just your wife.
- Okay, now... - That's just a side chick that made it.
You're gonna respect your elders now.
- Happy Purge, neighbor. - The fuck?
Baby, he's got a gun.
- Can I please go back in the house, Dad? - I'ma pop them legs now.
- Relax. - What?
That's why I got the switch.
- Welcome, Blacks! - Hey, hey, hey!
- Why you yelling? - Oh, you must excuse him.
He gets so excited when we get to meet new people.
Especially different people.
So welcome to our beautiful neighborhood.
- I am Jim Smith and... - That makes me Mary Smith.
And we are... the Smiths.
- We come bearing gifts. - I'll take that.
- You eat this? - Yeah.
It's little goodies from Williams and Sonoma.
- So it's food. - Never mind him.
- He's a little... - Yeah, special needs.
Oh, I get it.
She's got a brother that's got special needs, too.
It's okay, little fella.
- That's a nice little guy. - What the fuck?
Why are you rubbing him like a yorkie terrier?
He is such a stinker.
It's true, I am.
I did not get your names.
- You are...? - I'm Lorena.
- Lorena. Latina? - Yes.
- Un nombre bonito. - Mucho gracias.
Okay, that's a fucking 'nough, Bill.
- Come on, man, what are you doing? - Stop flirting, you.
All that neato Telemundo shit.
Why would you want that when you can have this?
Sweetie, you know I can't resist a beautiful face.
- Thank you. - You better put a leash on his ass.
And you are?
My name is Carl Black.
Don't Hate Wiring. You've probably seen, you know, yeah.
But I also own a new company now.
It's called Mandingo Plumbing...
'cause I lay pipe.
- Carl. Carl, stop. - I'd like to lay some on your fat ass.
- And I come right after it. - Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed.
- Okay. - And look at this.
Are you a little black vampire?
- Stop it. - It's a little ironic...
that your name is Black...
- because you are... - Don't say it, bitch.
- Carl! - No, she know what she's doing.
You moved into the house...
at the end of Cherry Blossom, is that right?
- Yeah, yeah. - Yeah.
Yeah, I'll bet you got a deal on that one.
I did... oh, we did get a good deal in it, yes.
- Why? - Well...
Let's just say the last owners...
left in a little bit of a hurry, mid-renovation.
What the fuck is mid-renovation?
They didn't survive the Purge.
But, you know, I'm sure...
That's the first warning.
- Yes. - Happy Purge, neighbors.
Happy Purge!
Okay, well...
here's dinner.
- What is that? - It's chicken.
What, you've never seen chicken, Allie?
- Are you sure? - The kitchen is brand-new.
There's all those knobs, and I didn't really know how to put the...
I understand. It looks good.
Yeah, it looks like a vampire chicken...
after the sun comes out.
That better be the sound for the club.
What's with this Purge bullshit, all right?
Oh, my God, Dad. You don't pay attention to anything.
Tonight's only the most dangerous night all year.
Yeah, people can get away with robbing, murdering...
whatever crime they want for 12 hours.
And the police can't do anything about it.
Okay, look. Enough with this Purge shit, all right?
It's a damn joke.
People don't purge in no damn neighborhood like this.
Shit, man, I just got out of prison and here you go with this fuckin' shit.
I didn't come out for this shit.
I'm too old for this shit, man.
- Shit. - Maybe it was just down the street.
Maybe we should board up the windows or something.
- Yeah. - Blacula.
Are you scared?
I thought you was the night of the walking dead.
I'm the living dead.
The walking dead are zombies.
I think Carl's Jr.'s right. We need to batten down the hatches.
- You know what I'm saying? - No, no, no, listen, guys.
I moved you guys to the safest zip code in the country, all right?
They don't purge in neighborhoods like this.
Back in Chicago, we couldn't even look out the windows, remember?
But at least we knew who was coming for us.
Now, we're safe.
This is protection.
This is first class living right here, all right?
We don't have to worry about all that crazy stuff.
Oh, shit, I'd rather be in jail getting fucked.
Fuck this shit. I ain't with this.
They're ready to kill all the blacks.
They are purging for blacks!
- They want the niggas! - Shut up!
Carl, we need to get everybody in the car right now...
and drive out of this crazy neighborhood right now!
Listen, listen, listen. Listen, everybody.
Listen, all right?
Now, we're gonna go to the panic room.
Relax. It's the purge...
but it ain't for us, okay?
- Okay. - All right, come on, let's go.
Let's move. Let's go.
I thought we weren't allowed to go out there!
We gotta go!
Thanks.
Does asbestos smell like weed?
'Cause if so, I smell it.
Shut up.
Nothing. You see anything?
Do you see anybody?
- No. - All right, then.
- What does this button do? - Stop touching stuff, Junior.
What? I didn't even do anything!
Ever since Mom died, I can't do anything right.
- Carl's Jr. - No.
Dad...
that was really messed up.
You know what? I'm going to my room.
And don't anyone come and check on me, okay?
Not tonight.
They acting like Will Smith's kids now.
Carl, is she hiding something?
- She's spoiled. - I know.
All right, I'm gonna go check on them.
I'll leave you alone.
Carl's Jr!
Are we in a scene of Diff'rent Strokes?
'Cause that's what it feels right now.
You Mr. Drummond now.
Cuz, just relax, cuz.
They all know you got a lot of stuff on your mind.
But you know what'll ease that?
Smoke a little ganja.
I got ya. I'm gonna roll up.
Freezee!
You're hot, nigga.
- Not if I kill 'em first. - Who that?
What?
You gotta go. Who is it?
- Lorena. - Oh, shit.
My dick hard. Let me just finish real quick.
Go in my bathroom.
Coming!
- What do you want? - Well, I wanna talk to you.
- Are you coming in my room now? - Yeah.
- What are you doing? - What's going on?
- Okay... - What are you doing?
What do you want?
I don't want anything. I just...
Allie, listen.
I just wanted to come talk to you...
because I am really not happy...
with all this fighting that's going on between us.
I know I'm not your mother.
- I don't want you to be my mother. - Trust me, I'm not.
And I will never be your mother...
but I want us to at least try and be friends.
I don't like all this fighting that's going on.
It's... It's uncomfortable.
- Okay. - Okay, good.
Look, I brought you a little gift...
a little peace offering.
You brought me something?
My mom gave it to me.
Oh, 'cause you don't got no money.
It's a necklace of the Virgin Mary...
and now I'm giving it to you to protect you tonight...
for this so-called Purge.
- Thanks. - You like it?
Yeah.
Okay, how about a thank-you hug?
- Okay. - Okay, come here.
It's a hug, Allie.
- God! - Okay.
- Okay, goodbye. - All right.
Bye! Thank you. Bye.
I'm gonna go talk to your brother.
All right. Okay.
What are you doing?
- I'm coming! - What are you doing?
Look at how you live.
Oh, my God!
Yo, man.
It's never fucking enough.
Man, it's hard trying to please this girl...
my family, my cousin, my friends.
I'll tell you right now...
I ain't one of them 'cause I'm proud of you, cuz.
- Yeah? - With the Wings and Things shit, man.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Shit, when I was locked up, cuz...
the only thing I could think about was getting out of Chicago...
and look at us now.
Beverly Hills! Nigga, we made it.
You got all types of shit.
Look at all these lions, tigers, and bears, oh, my!
- Yeah. - For real, nigga...
like, are we on "Animal Planet" in this motherfucker?
You ever watch that channel? Them motherfuckers be...
You killed all this yourself?
You're doing your thing, man, but for real, cuz...
I'm telling you, man, like...
you got me out of this shit.
Like, when I grew up, only thing, you know...
all I've been doing was robbing, stealing, cheating.
Now I ain't gotta do none of that shit no more.
And I know, I know your family tripping off me and everything...
but let me tell you something. They'll get over it.
The best thing about it...
we 3,000 miles away in Beverly Hills...
from Key Flo's crazy ass.
I do not wanna be around that nigga.
- That nigga is... - Excuse me. Back up.
Key Flo's out?
Yeah, you ain't know that?
I thought he had about five or six years.
Nope, that nigga's good and out now.
He killing all the witnesses now.
For real, like, he is killing them.
But the crazy part about it...
is the police never found the money...
or they didn't find the weed.
He killed all the witnesses.
Killed them all, man.
You remember that grandma that told on him?
Bitch dead.
Then he killed this preacher.
This preacher was sitting there riding on a bicycle.
- He shot her 72 times. - All right, shut the fuck up, man!
I'm trying to tell you a story.
Fuck Key Flo!
All right?
Why? You nervous?
You you should know...
Weren't you with him the day...
the day he got locked up?
You was with him, right?
'Cause you were doing some installation on...
No!
I'm just saying, I mean...
you're good, though.
We're out here in Beverly Hills.
Ain't nobody gonna fuck with us.
You act like you're with him or something.
Look, I feel, I feel Key Flo...
'cause if that was my shit...
nigga's gotta die. D-E-D.
Die. Dead.
Finito.
Killing everything. Women, kids, grandma.
Lions, tigers, all this shit.
Nigga gotta die.
Nigga's got... It's karma, bro.
If you're gonna take something from somebody...
- then he's gonna... - I gotta go.
Spit all on the weed.
Carl's Junior?
- Hey, Lorena. - Hey.
Oh, this looks cool.
Thanks. It's my vampire lair.
I see that. What are you doing?
I would tell you, but I fear the NSA will implicate you.
I completely get it.
I get it.
Are you doing okay?
Yeah, it's just that Dad's always yelling at me.
- And he just makes me mad sometimes. - You wanna talk about it?
You don't have to be nice to me.
What do you mean "have to"?
I know I'm a weirdo.
My real mom could barely stand to be around me.
She have birth to me. All you did was marry my dad.
Okay, listen. Your mom loved you.
I promise you she loved you.
And I, believe it or not...
can totally stand to be around you.
- Really? - Yeah.
Well, most of the time.
- Thanks, Lorena. - All right, listen.
We have a deal, okay? You don't hide anymore.
We're gonna stick together.
We're gonna be a team, okay?
- Okay. - All right.
Oh, my God!
Where's my lighter at?
- Hey. - You got another one of these?
This motherfucker here don't seem like it wants to work.
Where'd you get that at?
Where'd I get it from?
Yeah, where'd you get my shit at?
Nigga, I see you have a whole life's supply of this shit...
so I figured I'd help myself, cuz.
What the fuck you talking about?
Oh, God.
No.
What was that?
- What was that? - I don't know.
Where's the money at?
Is that my dad?
Let's go see what your crazy father's doing...
- with Cronut. - Cronut.
'Cause I didn't know if the Purge was gonna come in here.
I brought you out here. You're disrespecting my kids.
- Man, come on. - Messing with my wife.
- Come on, bro. - You're threatening them.
- Who would threaten... - You did! You did!
- Get out of here. Get out of here. - Hey, stop.
Hey, you ain't gonna hit me no more...
with that goddamn bat.
You know I did the two years. I die by mine.
Know that. Don't hit me no more.
- Okay, well, know this. - What?
Some kids need their ass spanked...
I think it's the Purge.
I wasn't gonna fuck your old lady.
Boy, ain't no purge happening in Beverly Hills.
What's that mean?
You know what? I'm just gonna check it out.
- Just stay here, okay? - ...I'm sorry!
- Just don't move. - Okay.
Time to die, everyone. Movie over.
They're gonna purge me, Carl!
Daddy? Daddy!
- ...you're gonna be sorry! - Get your ass out of here.
- Dad! - Carl, that is your family out there.
- Fuck him! - But tonight's the Purge!
You put out Cronut again?
Yeah, I kicked Cronut's ass out of here.
Y'all gonna defend a damn dude...
- that just got out of prison? - What?
Let him do some time in Beverly Hills.
- He's gonna die out there. - I don't give a fuck if he dies.
- R-I-P, Cronut. - Cronut needs to be inside with us.
It's the Purge! They're crazy.
- Let him back in the house. He's family! - Move, bitch!
Yeah! What's up?
Yo, what's up, Mr. Frosty?
It's Freezee, nigga! I'm sick and tired of you.
- What you doing in my house? - What I was up here doing?
I was making sweet love to your daughter...
making you a grandkid.
With no protection.
John Witherspoon-looking little motherfucker.
- I'm coming up here. - Purge on this nigga!
- Run! - Bitch!
You ready for the Purge?
Allie, what you doing up there with that boy?
- What are you doing? - I'm gonna purge this nigga.
- Why? He's my family. Stop! - Shut up!
I'm doing it for you.
I thought you said you loved me.
- I love you. Watch this. - That's my family!
- Shut up, bitch! - Daddy, run!
Hey, bitch! Shut up!
- You shut up! - Shut up!
- No, you shut up! - Shut up!
- Bitch. - Freezee!
- Bitch, I'm crazy. - Stop!
I done... with you.
I knew it. I knew you was crazy!
- Fuck you, Mr. Freeze. - No! Daddy, hide!
Put the gun down!
- I'm in the studio, bitch! - Why you doing this?
You told me I was your trap queen!
Oh, shit!
Fuck. Daddy!
I think I killed him!
Oh, my God. Carl, we're going to jail.
No. Allie, you're going to jail.
I don't wanna go to jail!
- Look what you did. - You told me I was your trap queen!
- Freezee. - Oh, shit.
- Damn. - Carl, touch him.
All right, we got a dead nigga in the house.
- Oh, Carl. - Okay, now listen.
I watched First 48. We gotta wipe this house down.
- First 48? - First 48.
We gotta make sure ain't no more black people around here...
- 'cause they will snitch. - Wait, it's the Purge, okay?
It doesn't... we're not gonna get in trouble, remember?
Yeah, but they'll charge me.
Carl, no. Don't touch him.
- That makes it worse. - I don't wanna touch him either.
- Carl. - Roll up, roll his ass up.
- Come on. - Oh, no!
- How are we gonna... - I don't wanna touch him!
Shut the fuck up.
Oh, God.
Carl, who is that?
Dad, who is that?
- He's got a chainsaw. - Who is that?
It's Donald Trump.
I'm just kidding. It's been a while.
Go to the panic room.
I heard you.
- Let's go. - CJ, come on.
Hello, Carl.
Or should I call you Mr. Black?
How do you know my name?
We know how you can afford...
to live in this neighborhood...
- and you're not welcome. - You've been Googling my ass?
You're not wanted here, Carl.
We enjoy watching your kind on the football field...
the basketball courts, and the boxing ring.
But we pay for cable TV...
to see you on our television...
not to live in our neighborhood.
Daddy, I'm scared.
It's a matter of time...
before your wife starts to braid hair...
like Allen Iverson!
Why does he still have the braids?
We like Allen Iverson's braids.
- Yeah. - We do.
Mr. Black...
it's a matter of time...
before our wives want to sleep with you.
And I do not want you destroying my wife's guts.
So I must destroy you.
You think I'm scared of you?
We don't want a nigga.
- What? - What?
You out of your mind?
- Too much? - Yeah!
- What the hell are you thinking? - Way too much.
Sorry about that, Carl.
Nah, fuck all that.
No, no, don't be sorry.
Your ass is grass for saying that.
That's on me. I really wanna apologize for that.
So everything else I meant.
That last part I didn't, so sorry about that.
Don't... that ain't...
- Put the... - Dude, just let...
You wanna be sorry? Get out my motherfucking house.
Tonight, you're being purged for being a liar, Carl Black...
- and I'm coming in there! - You can't get in here!
- Yeah. - Watch, bitch.
It's protected by Viper!
I'm going to cut the power now, Mr. Black.
So it's going to be harder to see you and your family.
Maybe if you smile...
it would help us find you in the dark.
Fuck.
Jesus. My power tool has run out of gas.
What are the chances?
I'll be back, Mr. Black.
Why is my power tool out of gas?
The Purge is the same time every year, you two imbeciles.
- I'm scared of the dark. - What?
How are you a vampire and scared of the dark?
Vampires are scared of the dark sometimes.
It's just a little thing that goes on.
Don't worry about it. We're on lockdown.
They can't do nothing to us.
They killed the power.
Up with y'all?
What the hell? Where'd you come from?
- I came through the back. - The back?
What the hell you mean you came through the back?
- We on lockdown! - Clearly, we're not.
Man, you got a lot of broke windows out there in the back.
You need to get that shit checked.
You ain't check that shit on Zillow before you bought this shit?
Look, if that window's open...
who knows what else is open.
You go check out the front...
and I'ma go check out the back.
Wait, wait, wait, black people don't split up.
- Yeah. - We gotta split up tonight.
Girls, y'all stay here.
Come on, let's do it.
All right, guys, listen...
we're gonna be fine as long as we stay together.
I can't take this anymore. I have to go.
- Carl's Jr! - God!
The Purge is on, motherfuckers!
- Who's there? - Welcome to the neighborhood, Blacks!
Hey, hey! They're upstairs!
It's gonna be okay.
Dark is just the opposite of light.
I don't play that shit.
You think you're gonna run me out of this nice-ass house?
I'm from the hood. Can't nothing fuck with me.
Once you go black, you die!
Bitch, this is not a game.
Shut the fucking door around here, shit.
Bitch-ass!
Bad night to be a lyin', thievin' runaway.
Key Flo...
what you doin' in L.A., baby?
Crazy shit goin' on out there tonight, Carl.
You scared, Carl?
No, I ain't scared.
I'm just doing some dishes for my family.
Fuck am I scared, be scared of?
You look real good, Carl.
I appreciate it. I been drinking my water...
eating cantaloupes, watermelons.
Real good, like a scoop of...
- What the fuck is that? - ...chocolate ice cream.
You know chocolate's my favorite, man.
Well, I'm mocha brown.
Damn, I heard you just got out too, man. You look good.
They said you was just rollin' around the neighborhood, man...
and decided you want to stop in my kitchen.
- Yeah, to your kitchen. - Yeah.
Looks pretty good, marble tables...
- Since we old friends, I need to know... - Oh, shit.
How much a place like this costs.
Man, you know this ain't really, like, a real mansion.
- Really? - Yeah.
Whatever you paid, it had to be steep.
I got some financial backers, man.
Financial backers? Maybe like Bank Key Flo.
Remember that?
You forgot about how you left Chicago?
With a whole lot of money and a whole lot of drugs...
that didn't belong to you.
I'm not even gonna bring up the shit you stole...
- besides that, you know. - What did I take?
- A space heater. - I didn't take no damn space heater.
Nigga, you took my space heater, nigga!
That's right.
You took my toilet seat with the dollar bills on it.
- A toilet seat? - You know what the fuck I'm talking about!
I don't even like toilet seats!
That's one thing about me.
Guess what?
You gonna get my money and my dope back.
Tonight.
Why are you so angry?
Nigga, you don't need to worry about all that.
- You know what you need to worry about? - What?
Is that tonight, I can kill you for free.
- For free? - For free.
Won't go back to jail. You'll just be smoked, nigga.
Off the count. You know what I'm saying?
You're gonna give me all my shit back... tonight.
How did you get out here, on Southwest?
I know you's a funny nigga and all that...
but I ain't in the mood for no jokes right now.
I know it, and I'm trying to make sure that me and you don't fall out.
I'm gonna give you your money back.
I got some Mexicans that's gonna come in town.
They bringing a hundred of them things in here.
- I'm their connect. - Who's your connect, nigga?
I will cut your fucking goatee off, nigga!
- Please, don't. - This not a fucking game.
This is real. This is real, nigga.
You gonna give me all of mine tonight.
And if you don't give me mine...
I'ma have to add some more colors to my flashy track suit.
Yeah, maybe some red or some brown.
Whoever let you walk out the house with that jacket is not your friend.
Nigga! This ain't the time for your goddamn...
I want my money and my dope, nigga.
Tonight.
You wrong, man, 'cause you got busted.
When the police came looking for you, you left...
and that's when I took the stuff.
The police was gonna get it anyway.
- Hey, baby. - Carl, you lied to me.
Baby, not right now. Come on.
You have this man in here with a gun...
about to purge us, and you're lying?
No, I didn't, I didn't...
Look, I can't explain it to you right now...
but I'll explain it to you later, all right?
Can't catch a break tonight, can you, Carl?
- Daddy, help me! - I think that's Allie.
That's my daughter right there, man, they gonna purge me!
I'm purging you, nigga!
- There is no "they." - Look, man, let me tell you something...
I don't know who the fuck you think I am...
- but I ain't gonna stand for this! - Shit!
Bitch-ass.
Key Flo?
Key Flo? Key Flo?
Key Flo, you cool? Key Flo?
Bitch, you thought I was gone?
Duck, duck, goose, motherfucker.
Carl Black, bring your bitch-ass out here.
You are light-skinned. All light-skinned niggas are bitches.
You can't hide!
Lady on my chain, please don't let them...
Daddy, they purgin' us!
Daddy...
You freakin' republican!
Please! Please don't hurt me!
Please!
- Who are you? - You missed.
- Who are you? - Bitch.
- What do you want? - Cut it out.
Dennis Strahan.
But you might know me by another name...
Visa.
- Visa? - That's right.
And I'm here for Carl Black.
Your deadbeat dad has multiple cards under multiple names...
buying iPads he can't afford. I see the Louboutin receipts!
Well, can't he just take out a loan, or layaway...
Too late for that. The bigwigs decided.
I'm here to take the Black family off the books.
Tonight!
- Where is he? - I don't know!
- Yes, you do, little girl. - No, I don't!
And I'm gonna find him!
Your account is canceled, bitch!
Surprise!
Shut up! Don't you call my girl a bitch!
Fuck you!
You people are all the same.
You want the best brand names...
but do you want to work for it? No!
Well, guess what? We're the credit card company...
and we own your ass!
Get off of her.
Get off of her!
Is he dead?
I think we killed him.
Take that, motherfucker! Yeah!
Piece of shit!
Come out, come out, wherever you are.
Come to papa.
I'm coming for you, storm troopers.
Carl, stop playing that.
They purgin', bro.
Are you okay?
No!
I thought you said we were safe in Beverly Hills.
Your father told me the same thing, okay?
Okay.
Allie, did you hear that?
- Daddy! - Fuck! What y'all doing over here?
You lied to us.
Look, we're gonna talk about that later, all right?
- When? - Don't start that shit right now.
- I can't stand you. - Stop it!
Listen, if anything happens to me...
- I love y'all. - Stop that shit right now.
You can't hide forever!
- Look, they purgin', all right? - She killed somebody.
- I did! - I killed a motherfucker, too!
Listen, where's Carl's Jr?
- We don't know, he's hiding. - Go find him, Carl.
Oh, man, that's my only son.
- Please get us out of here. - Isn't this more fun than our anniversary?
- We've gotta go find Carl. - Let's go. Come on.
- Carl, be careful. - Come out to play, Webster.
- I ain't fuckin' scared. - What you talkin' about, Willis?
- I'm scared. - I'm the man of the fuckin' house.
If the tall one looks like O.J., I'm gettin' him!
I don't wanna die.
- I love you. - Don't hold my fuckin' arm so tight.
I'm sorry!
- Carl. - Go kill it.
Okay, come on, come on.
I'ma blow that do-rag right off 50 Cent.
Slow down, Carl.
See anything?
- What's wrong, son? - Come here, Carl.
Carl's Jr, come here.
Boy, get your ass over here.
Goddamn!
What the fuck?
Tonight is the Purge, Carl Black.
Wait, where... Where I know you from?
Carl Black, you know me.
You better let my son go!
Not tonight, Carl.
Not tonight. You have to pay your debt tonight.
- Where do I know you from? - Got a real short memory, Carl.
- Where do I know you from? - Shit.
I'm James Clown...
from Clowny Bouncing House and Party Rentals.
- You know me. - Oh, yeah, I remember you.
You were at my 10th birthday party.
- That was a really good one, right? - Yeah!
I really enjoyed that one, too. They don't give parties like that anymore.
But still!
Nigga, you talkin' about the jumpy houses?
Yeah, I'm talkin' about the jumpy houses that you rented and never paid me...
and had me there all day.
- I think I do remember this. - Yes, you remember me...
and tonight you gonna pay with your narrow ass.
You got the bouncy house,
you got the card trick.
You got the Platinum Party Package deal.
Yes, you got it all, and you never paid.
I got the Platinum Party Package Deal?
You know you got it, Carl Black...
and then you gave me this fake number...
to call you for an invoice, and there was nothing.
Let me tell you something, James Clown from the jumpies.
I don't give a fuck where you from.
That's my motherfucking son...
and I'd die for his ass.
- Really? - Really.
Leg shot!
- I got fired because of you. - No, no you didn't.
You should have had the damn party...
on the first or the 15th of the month, that's what.
Goddamn rotten little kids of yours. They threw pies at me.
I don't know where they get those goddamn pies.
- Yeah, they ain't worth a damn. - I never seen a pit bull with a perm.
Your mother's so ugly, when she turns around...
she make Right Guard make a left, and make Secret a rumor, motherfucker.
Hey, man, your breath smell like adult toys.
Motherfucker!
I want my money!
Give me my money now, Carl Black.
Take your motherfucking hands off my motherfucking cousin, clown.
Don't make me make you my bitch, nigga.
You better recognize and realize. Better not touch my dog.
Turn around right now and tell him you sorry...
or I'll beat your motherfucking ass.
I ain't scared to go back to jail, nigga. I already did two years, nigga.
I know my number by heart. 643586 something, nigga.
- Tell him them numbers. - Fuck's wrong with you?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Leg shot.
I ain't even feel it. I ain't even feel it.
Give me my money, you dumb son of a bitch.
You still got pieces of ear in your teeth.
You're a low-down, sucker, fucker, fake...
I'm gonna drill your big-ass head.
No one messes with Cronut's family!
You hear me?
Oh, my God, you killed him!
- He's dead. - Oh, my gosh!
- Oh, man. - Shit. They gonna take me back to jail.
- I killed him. - You done killed Venus Williams.
They gonna take me back to jail, Carl!
- Shit. - Cronut!
We gotta get out of this house. Come on.
Told you!
Who can I snitch on this time?
Oh, shit!
Carl Black?
Where you at?
Where's the keys to the car?
They're right there on that table.
Got get 'em.
Come on, Carl, man. I just killed somebody, man.
I'm tired, man.
All that shit you was talking?
Carl Black? Are you dead, motherfucker?
Let me protect them. I'll protect them.
- You go and get 'em. - Yeah! Somebody gonna get purged tonight!
I got them. I got them. You go get him.
Be careful, Daddy. Be careful.
You stole that money and ran off to California like I couldn't find you!
You took Key Flo's money, and I need it back.
I need that money back...
I know you was wondering who was coming down that chimney.
It ain't Santa Claus, bitch.
Ho, ho, merry Christmas.
I'm about to give you peace on Earth...
'cause I got the pieces right here, motherfucker.
I came down your chimney, I had to hold my breath.
All the way down, and do you know how long I had to hold my stomach in...
to get through that motherfucker?
Up on the rooftop Click, click, click
I'm 'bout to shoot off Carl Black's dick
Where you at, bitch?
- Where you at? - I don't even know you, man.
I see you, motherfucker.
Remember me? I'm your parole officer, bitch...
and I'm your P.O...
who is pissed the fuck off.
Fuck you!
- Y'all run! - You stole from Key Flo.
Your mama snitched on you.
It's easy to get something out of your mama...
when I gave her some Hennessey and some of this dick!
If I throw a cheeseburger on the ground...
you've got to make a decision, big boy!
I got the keys, fat motherfucker.
Fuck you callin' me fat?
Yeah, I was just playing with you, Carl Black.
Thinking about sending your punk ass to jail, make you somebody's bitch.
You my bitch!
Now I got these infrared beams out, pimp...
and they never miss.
Hey, Carl Black, consider your ass...
purged!
I thought he shot me.
Shit. It's a fuckin' cardboard box.
What the fuck?
God is good.
Precious is dead down here!
We killed Shamu!
Carl Black, you punk bitch...
I told you I'd be back.
Nigga, where are you? I will fuck your wife.
Daddy!
- Carl! - Take that thing off.
They tried to kill me downstairs.
- They're trying to kill all of us, man. - For real.
Why'd you leave him down there alone?
Somebody had to be there to protect y'all. I'd die for y'all.
I'm here for you, and you!
Okay, okay, listen, listen.
We got to get downstairs and we got to get in that truck...
and get the fuck out of here, all right?
- Now. - Let's go, man, you right.
- Yeah, let's do it. - I need my weed and I need my money.
I promise I'ma give you everything as soon as we get out of here.
You better. Junior, come out from up under there.
- Come on, baby. - Junior!
I'm not the one you want! You want Carl Black!
Saw someone run down the hall.
Cronut, Cronut, Cronut!
- Damn! - Cronut, God damn.
Are we just gonna leave him in there?
They got him. That mean they got my damn money.
Cronut's going to little man heaven.
Daddy, now is not the time.
They took his do-rag off. You know he balded.
Oh, no.
Feels like we in a goddamn horror movie.
- Okay, now, what's the rules? - What are the rules?
- What rules? - The scary movie rules.
Yeah, horror movie rules.
We gotta do the shit that white people don't do.
- Survive? - No.
Let's get out of here quicker than a cat can lick its ass.
Carl Black?
I came to purge you. Come on, you bitch-ass nigga!
I'm going to blow-dart your ass.
Scary movie, scary movie. Texas Chainsaw...
- Friday the 13th... - Gonna get you, suckers.
- No... - Carl's Jr., you're not helping.
I'm trying.
Okay, Halloween, Laurie Strode...
Jamie Lee Curtis, in her breakout role.
- Escapes from Michael Myers. - What does she do?
She stabs him in the eye and pushes him out the window.
Come on out, Sofia Vergara.
Of course, he's not dead. He comes back again and again and again,
becoming an undead killing machine.
So, basically, what I'm saying is, we're going to die.
- We're all going to die. - You gonna die! If you keep talking!
- Just talking about scary... - Shut up! Who got a belt?
Okay, okay! I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I'll tear your ass up in the middle of this purge.
- Can't run from us now! - Quit trying to help!
Smells like black chicken.
I'm gonna go get the black one!
- Told you. - You can't hide forever!
Carl's Jr!
Carl!
I'm just gonna go get him, okay?
All right.
Look, this is my fault.
When I came with all them scams and all that different stuff.
I was just trying to give my family a better life, okay?
- I know. - And now people getting killed and shit.
- Damn. - Come out, come out wherever you are!
I hope you forgive me.
I forgive you for it.
I love you.
You lied, Mr. Black...
- so I'm here to purge you, Carl. - Go, go, go, go.
Carl, careful.
If you want me, come and get me.
Carl, you lied to me on your application!
Nobody has a credit score of 45,000!
Carl, your family and you don't belong here.
I invited some of your friends from Chicago.
Turns out you owe everyone money.
- Why you doing this to me? - You were born.
We don't want you in this neighborhood, Willis.
Next thing you know, try to buy my son some Air Jordans...
they're gone.
Now my son's gotta wear New Balance.
Then your kids...
are gonna wanna have sex with my kids...
and we got a bunch of kids...
Paula Pattons running around the neighborhood.
Man, fuck Nick Cannon!
What's Nick Cannon got to do with this shit?
I don't know! I'm rambling.
I have never been inside this home.
The crown molding is amazing.
This would be a great house to live in.
Or a great house to die in!
Tell you what, Carl.
Consider this home a swamp...
and I'm the alligator.
Chomp, chomp.
About to bite that ass.
Han Solo's dead.
Spoiler alert.
The little one, he escaped!
We have to find him now...
that little Kevin Hart.
Weird, cap-looking bitch.
One down, five to go.
Carl's Jr?
Carl's Jr.
- Damn it. - Okay.
Okay, all right, all right, all right.
Allie, stop crying, okay?
Nobody's gonna kill us, okay?
We are not gonna get purged in here.
We are the Blacks, do you understand?
- Who are we? - We're the Blacks.
- Okay. - Is this 911?
No, 211.
Yes, my name...
My name is Carl Lawrence Black.
Stop breathing so hard, motherfucker.
I'm not selling ass.
We have to go into the shower...
...together.
I don't wanna be gay.
Not like that.
- You go first. - You go first.
- He's your brother. - This is your house.
Fine.
I need you to send some help over here right now...
'cause if you don't, I'ma kill myself!
Well, nigga, go ahead!
Kill yourself. I don't give a fuck.
Allie, look at me. We can do this, okay?
We're not gonna die here, all right?
- You really do love us, Lorena. - Of course I do.
What do you think I'm doing all this crazy shit for?
- I thought you was a ho. - God.
All right.
Allie.
All right, one, point the light that way...
- Okay. - ...and let's go.
Okay.
All right, let's go.
Man, I'm a black man in Beverly Hills.
- I got a 310 number. - Nigga, you don't move your black ass...
out them white people's house. They're gonna fuck you up, man!
Get out, nigga!
Hello?
Hello!
Hello?
Hey!
- Hey! - Shit.
I'm gonna purge your ass tonight, yeah.
Gonna purge your ass tonight.
Gonna purge your...
What y'all bitches doing in my mansion on purge night?
- Your mansion? - Did I stutter?
My mansion!
If you're here, okay, to purge my husband Carl...
Your husband?
Carl, your husband?
Baby, I could write a book...
on the shit you don't know.
- Allie, who is this? - I don't know.
Talk to Shoranda. I'm listening.
We don't know who you are, bitch.
- Who the fuck are you? - Who the fuck are you?
- Shut the fuck up! - She has a cleaver!
I will chop them fucking brains out, bitch.
Okay, okay, okay, wait, wait, wait.
Miss, what do you want?
I came to get my husband back...
Carl Black.
- Your husband? - Yes.
My husband that you stole from me.
He belongs to Shoranda.
Shoranda Black, bitch.
Oh, my God, I do remember her.
- From where? - She gave my daddy a ride...
and he got a restraining order against her.
And I made that fool a pie.
He doesn't like pie.
He loves this pie, boo.
- Hey! - She's a stalker.
Don't play with me.
I will slit your fucking throat.
Hey!
Let's purge, bitch.
Lorena!
Stop it!
Girl, he's not your man.
He's a liar, but he's my liar.
He's my liar, too, bitch!
- Big Shoranda. - Slam it over her head.
Fuck it...
You done hit me on my goddamn back!
Carl's Jr! Oh, my gosh.
You did it. You did it!
- Are you okay? - Yeah, I was hiding over there, Mom.
- You called me mom. - Yeah, is that okay?
Yes.
- Oh, my God. Allie, are you okay? - I'm fine.
- Thank you, Lorena. - You're welcome.
All right, listen, guys.
We have to go out there...
Why are you taking your shirt off?
...and get your dad, okay?
- No more hiding, Junior, okay? - Okay, okay.
All right, let's stick together, okay?
- Okay. - Okay.
- Let's go. - You did it, Blacula.
- Crazy bitch. - Hey!
We gotta get out of this house.
We gotta get out of here!
Carl, come on, man. Come out!
In another neighborhood, we could've been friends.
I saw Django.
I was glad Jamie Foxx killed all those people.
I would've never put your wife in a box...
in the backyard.
That was bullshit.
Fuckers.
- White power. - White power.
You motherfuckers think you can come here on Purge night?
Welcome to the Beverly Hills Ku Klux Klan, motherfuckers.
Amen!
You think you can come into my neighborhood...
straight out of Compton...
waving your hands in the motherfucking air...
like you just don't care...
This look like the Oscars.
Oh, my God.
- You guys are about to die! - Please, white nigga.
- Please take me with you, please. - No.
- I want the same outfit. - I got a chair right here...
waiting for your friend, Mr. Carl Black.
Yeah, motherfucker.
I'm in the Klan, too.
White nigga, listen to me. I'm on your side.
I will take one of them sheets right now and work with you...
and kill these niggas together.
Please don't kill us both. Just kill him.
He's the reason why we're even in America.
- White power. - We wouldn't have been on that boat...
- if it wasn't for him. - Shut the fuck up.
- White power. - How do you think they got here?
My great-grandfather sold these niggas to y'all.
- White power. - They also brought Ebola.
- Fuck you. - Fuck you, you "10 cents a day."
- You guys are confusing me! - Fuck you!
- White power! - Where the fuck is Larry?
- Please. - White power.
- Larry, where the fuck have you been? - White power.
Tom, this is a black!
- What the hell? - Yeah!
- White power. - I am black.
Carl Black.
Take that now. Yeah. Yeah!
Get on the ground with that.
- White power! - White power!
You want some of this shit, too?
Oh, damn!
- What the fuck is this? - White power.
- Looks like an M&M. - Big, black nigga dicks...
and big, black balls.
- Hey! - Big, wide, juicy white pussy.
- Damn! - What the fuck?
- God damn it. - What the fuck...?
Come on, let's get out of here.
- You see anything? - Let's get out ofhere!
- All right, guys. - Are we gonna die?
No, baby. We're just gonna go find your father.
We have to go downstairs, though, okay?
I wanna go home.
- Allie, I know, baby. - Where are we going?
We have to go downstairs and find your father.
- Downstairs? - We can't go downstairs!
Guys, we have to. Come on, come on.
Let's go, fast.
Come on.
Carl!
Okay, come on.
Carl!
- Oh, my God. - Hey!
I never thought I'd say this, but I missed y'all.
- You're still alive, Cronut. - Yeah, I'm here.
Listen, is everybody all right?
Yeah, I helped Lorena kick some ass.
I'm proud of you, man. Listen, we gotta get out to that garage...
and get in that car and get the fuck away from here.
- I'm ready. - Okay. Cronut, calm down.
Slowly.
- Carl? - There's people all over the place.
I didn't know you were black.
I should've known when you gave me the deposit...
in a Crown Royal bag.
Come on, let's just talk.
This house is too big.
You guys are acting like you're the Jackson 5 or something.
- You got the keys? - Yeah, I got 'em.
Cool, player.
Hey, man, if I die...
I'ma just give you all my money.
- It's all in the will for you. - You ain't got no fucking money.
The fuck?
What was that?
What? What, you hear something?
I think that's the "xactlies."
What's the "xactlies"?
Your breath smells exactly like your ass.
Carl.
Stop blowing on my neck.
Stop.
Go, go.
Come on. Come on, come on.
Come on. Get in the truck.
Oh, shit.
- Put your seatbelts on. - Put your seatbelt on.
Let's go.
- Drive, drive, drive. - Put your seatbelt on.
What the...?
Hey, hey! Be quiet!
Hey, hey!
You leave the keys in the car...
and get your ass out.
Man, get your ass out of my car!
Ain't no goddamn way. They're purging like crazy out there.
I've just seen a dog on its hind legs walking a human!
Listen, I can't believe I got a crackhead in our car...
- from Beverly Hills. - A crackhead? Look at me.
Do I look dressed like a crackhead to you?
I'm the damn repo man!
The repo man?
- Yeah, I... - You just keep lying.
Don't nobody get no car...
from Big Little Jimmy's Auto Shop and not pay!
- Get your ass back. - Your eyes is amazing.
Hey, hey, hey! Stop complimenting me!
He looks real cute in the face.
Hey!
- Don't look at me. - I can't see. I'm blind.
Had you paid your damn payments...
then maybe I wouldn't be here right now on Purge night!
- Get your ass out of here. - I'ma make my payments, man.
No, no, no. You're not gonna make 'em.
Everybody's gonna pay with a gun in their face.
When I'm like this, everybody's paying.
Can I just give you a money order?
On Purge night? Get out the car!
I done told you four times.
- Get out! - Okay, okay.
All that shit! Get out!
- Get your ass out of here. - All right, all right!
Call me.
You could've refinanced, man.
Listen, man, I'm a great devoted dad.
- I see that. - And I got this house out here...
because I wanted to give a better life for my family.
- I know, man. - But I'm black...
and I won't even let the boogeyman run me out of my shit.
Okay?
It's a purge going on...
and we don't need this.
We're trying to stick together.
Why come you can't come with us, man?
You look like Vanessa Williams, bro.
I know, man. I sat in this motherfucking car...
and I've been thinking like, "Why am I not a the house?
- Why am I not in a house?" - You're a nice guy, man.
I started doing all the math, and I thought about it.
It's 'cause motherfuckers like you don't pay shit.
Therefore, I can't buy no house like this.
I gotta always chase a motherfucker down...
and tonight, on Purge night of all nights...
they give me the slip?
Me? All the white motherfuckers...
that work there, and they gave it to the mixed nigga?
Why? 'Cause they thought I might almost kill your ass.
But tonight, I'll do it, motherfucker.
I got a couple hours left, and I will shoot you in your motherfucking face.
They killed my grandparents tonight, man.
They made them kill each other with plastic spoons.
They made them kill each other with plastic spoons!
- Get out. - All right.
Get out slowly.
- I'ma pay with your ass in a minute. - Can I get out this way?
Hell no, you know you can't get out this way.
Slick-ass niggas.
Damn, man.
Got me out here on Purge night.
Telling me all you got with your family problems.
I got family problems, too!
This is impolite as hell, too.
You knew goddamn well I'm gonna this car.
I'll shoot little Dracula.
- No, don't do it! - Shoot little Dracula, hell yeah!
No one dance to this shit.
Pay your bills, I wouldn't be here, man!
God damn it, don't you try nothing.
I hate to do this to you, man.
Looked like you were capable of paying them notes.
Looked like you could've did if you believed in yourself.
Could still see your ass in the rearview. Don't try no slick shit.
'Cause don't you try shit.
Don't you try shit.
What's that noise?
Shit, I got balls.
I got balls, homie!
I got balls, homie.
Yeah, boom! Yeah.
Just like Paris Hilton did back in the day.
Turn it, turn it.
I know the dance move. I know the dance move.
I know the dance move. I know the dance...
Oh, but turn it around. Look out.
Get ready! Do-rag!
- Gonna kill you first. - Get back, get back!
I told you I'd get you sooner or later, Carl.
- Any last words? - Yeah, why does your voice keep changing?
I'm just working on different shit.
Jim! Mary!
- Hey, Larry. - Larry.
- What are you guys doing here? - Happy Purge.
Yeah, you guys brought the guns and the vests...
and the bullets, the shot...
That's a good look on you, Mary.
Just don't give me them bedroom eyes...
or I'm gonna have to purge Jim.
I'm just fucking with you. Hey, that thing got a laser on it?
Yeah! Mary got this online for me at the pre-Purge sale.
- Thank you, baby. - Thank you.
Larry, here's the thing. You're the worst president...
this Home Owner's Association's ever had.
It was you who filled out that application...
- and accepted it, right? - What?
I didn't know they were a black family.
How can you not know that?
Did you see their car? Did you see their rims?
I was doing the paperwork. I looked down, I just saw "Blacks"
Thought it was, like Jack Black.
We're gonna have to go back to a two-term limit.
- Larry, it's disappointing, man. - Absolutely.
You guys are so sensitive.
Tell you what. I'ma cut Carl up.
- You guys get the rest of the family. - Carl, no!
- We can do that. - Yeah.
Let's purge. We're gonna do a black family...
whose name's Black. It's twofer.
- Hey, Carl. - No, no. Come on, come on.
Shot me in the back!
I'm gonna need a wine cooler and you.
I thought we were friends.
Jim and Mary, thank you so much.
Thank you.
- You're welcome. - Hello, Blacks.
- Hey! - Just got one more thing for you.
- What? - What?
As the...
I guess I'm the new president of the Home Owner's Association.
Let me just say you have no business in this neighborhood.
- Excuse me? - Once a hood rat...
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
...always a hood rat.
You're the guys that brought us a gift basket.
Yeah, we did.
We give them to everybody.
I told you they don't like black folks in this neighborhood, man.
And now we're gonna serve you up your eviction notice, brother.
Damn!
They are killing like shit around here!
Jorge...
neighborhood watch, saves the day.
- Not again. Come on. - No, it's Jorge.
Baby, look, I told you my people are good.
Gracias, Jorge. Gracias. Besito, mi amor.
Well, I couldn't let them have all the fun.
Oh, God!
- Dang it! - Hold up, man. It's 7:01.
- The Purge is over. - Yeah, the Purge is over.
I don't give a shit what time it is.
For me, there's only one time.
- Oh, man! Just... - And it's time to take out the Blacks.
Okay, now, listen, man...
enough is enough.
- You're gonna kill us? - Fuck it.
Let me pray with my family.
Do what you gotta do...
and when you're down there, take care of me.
I'll wait.
Come on.
Let me pray with my family.
Everybody get over here.
Dear heavenly Father...
Motherfucker!
Oh, shit!
Stay back, stay back, stay back.
He might not be dead.
- No, he dead. - He's dead?
He's gone.
You did it!
- Daddy. - Babe.
My family, I love y'all.
I know I done made a whole lot of mistakes in my life...
but if there's one thing we learned today...
it's that we all love each other...
and we stick with each other, okay?
And, Allie, I'm proud of you.
But I want you to leave guys like Mr. Freezee alone.
You're a real woman. You need something better than that.
- All right, Dad. - Junior...
you can be anything you want in life.
- Just don't be like your daddy. - Thanks, Dad.
And, baby, I love you.
I love you, baby. Thank you.
- I'm over here. - Cronut.
- What's up, boy? - I need my money from you, man.
I got you. I'm gonna go get it right now.
But you ain't got nothing positive about me?
I like how you blew Sinbad up in that damn.
I told you, man, it's gonna work. You gotta put more trust in your boy.
I just ain't get the settlement, but you're good.
- You got your bread. - Yeah, well, go get it.
I'm gonna get... All right, I got it.
Don't purge your boy.
Yeah, man, I'm...
You know, Daddy made a whole lot of mistakes...
but there's one thing about me.
I love my family.
- I love us, too. - Love you, baby.
We gotta pack our shit up and get the fuck out of Beverly Hills.
- Yeah, let's go. - I'm with you.
Black family!
Boom, selfie! Nigga, we made it.
So we survived the night...
and I learned some valuable lessons.
Always handle your business the right way...
'cause fools be trippin'.
Never deal with racist homeowners.
And the most important lesson...
nothing is more important than family.
I'm still alive, nigga.
Winter's coming.
This is it.
Our new home.
This is our own cabin.
- It's gonna be great. - There it is.
New beginnings.
- It's so beautiful. - It is, right?
We can make s'mores and stuff like white people.
- It's gonna be fun. - I'm bringing all my bitches here, too.
Shut up.
- It's gonna be great. - Carl Black done escaped the Purge?
We beat the Purge. Black family!
Jason Voorhees?
I'ma drop a dime on Jason Voorhees.
I don't like that shit.
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