1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM 2 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:10,649 Come on. Let's go. 3 00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:14,621 Wait a minute! You can't just return them. 4 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,295 They said I wasn't a good fit. 5 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,917 There'll be another family, Michelle. 6 00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:37,012 Oh, come on! Wait a minute! 7 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,641 What's the matter with me? 8 00:01:41,685 --> 00:01:43,435 Not a thing, Michelle. 9 00:01:44,354 --> 00:01:46,694 God's children are all perfect. 10 00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,149 In their own way. 11 00:01:57,201 --> 00:01:59,081 Fuck you! 12 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,754 Never lose hope, Michelle. 13 00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:05,545 There's a family out there for everyone. 14 00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:07,836 Come on, Agnes. Families are for suckers. 15 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:10,838 Don't worry about me. I don't need anybody. 16 00:02:10,881 --> 00:02:12,721 I'm going straight to the top. 17 00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:16,720 Michelle. Michelle? 18 00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:18,432 Michelle! Michelle! 19 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:19,644 - Michelle! - Michelle? 20 00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:23,483 She's the CEO of three Fortune 500 companies 21 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:28,060 and the best-selling financial author of Money Talks, Bullshit Walks. 22 00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:31,228 The one, the only, Michelle Darnell! 23 00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:35,699 Who wants to make some money? 24 00:02:37,741 --> 00:02:40,741 I can't hear you, Chicago! 25 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:47,964 Get those hands up! 26 00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:56,473 Come on! There we go! 27 00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:59,549 MD going in on the verse 'Cause I never been defeated 28 00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:00,636 And I won't stop now 29 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:01,812 Keep your hands up, put 'em in the sky 30 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:03,810 For the homies didn't make it and my folks locked down 31 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,602 I never went nowhere 32 00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,686 They're saying 'Chelle's back Blame it on the conjure 33 00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:10,322 They call it M.D.-ac 34 00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,069 Can't never count me out 35 00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:13,439 Y'all better count me in 36 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:16,647 Got twenty bank accounts Accountants count me in 37 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:18,278 Make millions every year 38 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,953 The Chi's champion 39 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,993 'Cause all I do is... 40 00:03:22,244 --> 00:03:24,084 Give it up for T-Pain! 41 00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,621 All I do is win, win, win no matter what Got money on my mind 42 00:03:26,707 --> 00:03:28,117 I can never get enough 43 00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:31,248 And every time I step up in the building 44 00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:33,305 Everybody hands go up 45 00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:35,845 And they stay there 46 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:37,724 And they say yeah 47 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,091 And they stay there 48 00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:41,346 Up down, up down, up down 49 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:44,390 'Cause all I do is win, win, win 50 00:03:44,474 --> 00:03:48,404 And if you goin' in put your hands in the air Make them stay there 51 00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:01,491 Thank you, Chicago! 52 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,624 Thank you. All right. 53 00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:05,753 I love you! 54 00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:07,539 Thank you. I love you, too. 55 00:04:07,623 --> 00:04:09,293 My name is Michelle Darnell 56 00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:12,383 and I am the 47th wealthiest woman in America. 57 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,135 How wealthy am I? 58 00:04:16,173 --> 00:04:19,593 I had Destiny's Child reunite 59 00:04:20,344 --> 00:04:23,684 only to have them come over to my personal living room 60 00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:25,854 so I could watch them break apart again. 61 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,016 Huh? 62 00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:31,525 How did I get to my success level? What's my secret? 63 00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:33,769 I worked myself silly. 64 00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:36,360 Okay, number one. 65 00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:38,703 You work your ass off to get what you want. 66 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:43,237 Number two. You do not let other people drag you down. 67 00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:44,705 'Cause they will. 68 00:04:46,745 --> 00:04:51,205 They are an anchor in your life that you do not want. 69 00:04:51,250 --> 00:04:54,380 Cut 'em loose and sail off. 70 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,251 If you work this program... 71 00:04:56,338 --> 00:04:59,378 You. Will. Get. Rich. 72 00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,220 And I'm not talking about chump change. 73 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:08,224 And I'm not talking about some loose dollar bills at the bottom of your purse. 74 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:11,138 I'm talking about real fucking money! 75 00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:13,478 Life-changing money! 76 00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:17,937 Real fucking money! Real fucking money! 77 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:19,396 That's how you do it. 78 00:05:21,697 --> 00:05:23,527 Now let's go make some money! 79 00:05:55,606 --> 00:05:57,356 Thank you, Tito. What a night! 80 00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:59,611 That's right, MD. 81 00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:00,743 Yeah. 82 00:06:01,570 --> 00:06:04,450 I'm amazed that the United Center is even still standing 83 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:06,071 because I crushed it tonight. 84 00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:07,486 You crushed it like velvet. 85 00:06:07,576 --> 00:06:10,446 Like velvet! Send T-Pain some "thank you" flowers. 86 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,537 - Okay? - Okay. 87 00:06:11,622 --> 00:06:13,792 Look into getting more fire power to that bird. 88 00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:15,504 Absolutely. More power. 89 00:06:15,584 --> 00:06:17,794 No. The fire marshal almost shut us down 90 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:19,500 based on the pyrotechnics we used tonight. 91 00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:20,628 I don't think that's an option. 92 00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:22,724 Let's hire a new fire marshal. 93 00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:25,089 I don't think you can hire a fire marshal. 94 00:06:25,177 --> 00:06:27,007 I think it's a city-appointed position, 95 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:28,135 but I'll look into it. 96 00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:31,144 All she does is win, Claire. Toot-toot! 97 00:06:31,183 --> 00:06:33,943 I got this, Tito. Okay? You can sit this one out. 98 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:36,145 Claire? 99 00:06:36,188 --> 00:06:37,898 Oh, teeth whitening. Sorry. Sorry, yes. 100 00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,361 - My God. - Sorry. 101 00:06:39,942 --> 00:06:43,702 - Hmm. - I have to remind you. That seems... 102 00:06:44,154 --> 00:06:46,914 That seems like a little the opposite, right? 103 00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:47,990 Yeah. 104 00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:50,660 Okay. Yeah, I think if you keep your... 105 00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:53,412 You need to keep your tongue inside your mouth for this to work. 106 00:06:53,497 --> 00:06:57,247 Last week you very specifically said, "Keep tongue out." 107 00:06:57,334 --> 00:06:59,004 - No. - You did say that, Claire. 108 00:06:59,044 --> 00:07:01,134 I said, "Get your tongue out of the picture." 109 00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:02,591 She's got to breathe, Claire. 110 00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:04,473 Somebody must be hungry. 111 00:07:04,508 --> 00:07:07,338 Somebody gets very crabby when she's hungry. 112 00:07:07,678 --> 00:07:09,178 You're a little hangry, Claire. 113 00:07:09,263 --> 00:07:10,683 I'm not hangry, Tito. 114 00:07:10,806 --> 00:07:13,136 Hungry and angry. You hangry, Claire. 115 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:14,733 Sixty seconds of no talking. 116 00:07:14,810 --> 00:07:16,190 'Cause this has to set for 60 seconds. 117 00:07:16,311 --> 00:07:17,691 I've been waiting. I mean, I'm in here. 118 00:07:17,729 --> 00:07:19,269 You're the only one that's talking, Claire. 119 00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:21,686 You're the only one talking. It's hilarious. 120 00:07:21,733 --> 00:07:26,863 It's like that classic comedy gag, "He's on my baseball." 121 00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:28,195 Who's on my baseball? 122 00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:29,623 Who's on my baseball? 123 00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,913 Uh, who's on my baseball? 124 00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:34,249 - Oh, no it's... - Who's on my baseball? 125 00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:37,999 I think it's, "Who's on first. What's on second? I Don't Know is on third." 126 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:39,041 Right? 127 00:07:39,877 --> 00:07:42,377 - I don't think that's... - Uh, no. 128 00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:45,376 I think you're on my baseball. 129 00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:47,134 - Who's on my baseball? - First base. 130 00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,891 What's on my baseball? 131 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,260 Baseball 132 00:07:53,348 --> 00:07:55,728 Great. So, since I have you for a second, 133 00:07:55,767 --> 00:07:59,307 you told me to remind you exactly a year ago today 134 00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:03,066 that it's been three years since my last pay increase. 135 00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:04,608 I don't think that's true. 136 00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:06,403 That doesn't ring... 137 00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:08,075 Does that seem accurate to you? 138 00:08:08,447 --> 00:08:10,197 That sounds false. 139 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,584 But you crushed it tonight! 140 00:08:12,618 --> 00:08:15,288 It's not false, Tito. It's entirely accurate. 141 00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:17,620 And I wrote down what you said. 142 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:20,496 Oh, Claire, I don't know why you always have to quote. 143 00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:22,924 "Claire, exactly one year from today 144 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:25,423 "I'm going to give you a raise so big 145 00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:28,466 "you'll cream your jeans and shat your chaps." 146 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:32,390 Claire. That is wildly inappropriate. 147 00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:34,431 - Wildly. - Lowbrow, Claire. 148 00:08:34,473 --> 00:08:36,933 I run your entire organization, Michelle. 149 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,234 I do a great job. 150 00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:40,598 I made myself available for you 24 hours a day 151 00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:43,146 while being a single mom, I might add. 152 00:08:43,232 --> 00:08:45,732 I deserve a raise and a title change. 153 00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,356 I'd like "Executive Assistant." 154 00:08:48,487 --> 00:08:51,867 Now that surprises me, 'cause I did not know that you had a child. 155 00:08:52,616 --> 00:08:55,286 Was that through... Was that through intercourse? 156 00:08:55,536 --> 00:08:56,576 Yes. 157 00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:57,950 You know what? Good for you. 158 00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:01,077 Michelle, if you can't give me a raise, 159 00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:02,634 I can't continue to work here. 160 00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:08,554 Well, look who finally showed up to my seminar. 161 00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:11,886 'Bout time, Claire. I love it. 162 00:09:11,969 --> 00:09:13,799 I didn't know if you were listening all these years. 163 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:14,967 What am I always saying? 164 00:09:15,097 --> 00:09:16,257 "Don't go in that room." 165 00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:18,926 True. I do say that. But I also say, 166 00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:21,984 "If you want something, you gotta take it." 167 00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:24,060 Claire, you just took it. 168 00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:25,977 And you grew a pair in the process. 169 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,436 I'm holding your earrings. 170 00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:29,654 You're holding a pair of earrings 171 00:09:29,945 --> 00:09:33,205 that in 2001, I paid $62,000 for. 172 00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:36,621 And that's your raise, now. That's a good raise. 173 00:09:36,660 --> 00:09:37,790 And you earned it. 174 00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:39,201 Thank you. 175 00:09:39,288 --> 00:09:41,618 Congratulations on your balls, Claire. 176 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,670 Isn't Tito the greatest? 177 00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,091 I love Tito. 178 00:09:46,378 --> 00:09:47,588 What are you doing up here? 179 00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:50,341 Miss Darnell, this just came for you. They said it was urgent. 180 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,183 Oh, it's ringing. 181 00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:00,892 Oh, boy. 182 00:10:01,727 --> 00:10:03,017 Go for Darnell. 183 00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:05,904 I will not be ignored. 184 00:10:06,148 --> 00:10:07,148 Ah. 185 00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:09,529 Hi there, Ronald. 186 00:10:10,152 --> 00:10:11,282 It's "Renault." 187 00:10:11,737 --> 00:10:14,607 Why are you muscling in on my Takoro deal? 188 00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:17,200 You know what? A little birdie told me 189 00:10:17,284 --> 00:10:20,044 that Takoro was merging with Samson International. 190 00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:22,078 So I acquired the majority of the stock. 191 00:10:22,164 --> 00:10:24,674 That's called insider trading, Michelle. 192 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,538 Which makes you a criminal. 193 00:10:26,627 --> 00:10:29,047 You're going to be sorry you ever dishonored me. 194 00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:31,717 God, for the last time, you're not a samurai, Ronald. 195 00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:32,798 It's "Renault"! 196 00:10:32,883 --> 00:10:36,143 No, it's not. It's "Ron," and you're from Jersey. 197 00:10:42,434 --> 00:10:45,154 Phil. Take off that ridiculous top. 198 00:10:45,354 --> 00:10:46,984 You should never cover that up. 199 00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:48,114 Okay. 200 00:10:48,690 --> 00:10:51,150 Please don't forget you have an interview first thing Monday. 201 00:10:51,235 --> 00:10:52,325 We'll see. 202 00:10:53,195 --> 00:10:55,075 Let me just... Let me just help you out there. 203 00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:03,253 You'll regret this, Michelle! 204 00:11:08,252 --> 00:11:10,002 Get me the SEC. 205 00:11:10,087 --> 00:11:11,087 Okay. 206 00:11:11,797 --> 00:11:15,427 We are back with the one and only, Michelle Darnell. 207 00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:17,717 Let's talk about your relationship with your mentor, 208 00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:20,101 that mega mogul, Ida Marquette. 209 00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:23,391 Well, Gayle, we've got a terrific relationship. 210 00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:25,103 Really? I'm so surprised to hear that, 211 00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:28,523 only because we came across this tape the other day. Take a look. 212 00:11:28,647 --> 00:11:30,857 - Oh. - I was Michelle's mentor. 213 00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:32,611 It's so hard to describe her. 214 00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:36,743 She's a business woman, a visionary, a leader, 215 00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:39,320 a natural born cocksucker, a motherfucker, 216 00:11:39,408 --> 00:11:41,618 an ass-wipe, a shit stain, 217 00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:45,460 and sewer rat, fuck-face, professional. 218 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,630 Doesn't sound so chummy. 219 00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:51,630 Oh, I think a couple of those beeps were actually compliments. 220 00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:53,250 That's one way to look at it. 221 00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:54,957 Michelle, I want to talk about you. 222 00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:58,008 That you were, basically, abandoned as a child, 223 00:11:58,093 --> 00:12:00,643 bounced around from foster home to foster home, 224 00:12:00,721 --> 00:12:03,601 and that, really, you were raised in an orphanage. 225 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:04,930 No, no, no. 226 00:12:04,975 --> 00:12:10,315 I was lucky enough to attend a beautiful, lovely elite boarding school, 227 00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,977 very much like Hogwarts, to give you a visual. 228 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:16,436 And almost as magical. I feel very lucky. 229 00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:22,990 Where'd you get that? 230 00:12:23,035 --> 00:12:24,665 We've got a really good research team, 231 00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:26,583 and when I look at that picture, I don't think "elite." 232 00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,333 Can we talk about this for a second? 233 00:12:29,541 --> 00:12:31,631 - This interview is over. - Where are you going? 234 00:12:31,668 --> 00:12:33,208 I was not trying to upset you, Michelle. 235 00:12:33,295 --> 00:12:34,755 - Why are you leaving? - You know what, Gayle? 236 00:12:34,838 --> 00:12:37,668 Nobody spells "Gayle" with a "Y." It's pretentious. 237 00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:39,550 You've got a great story to tell. 238 00:12:39,635 --> 00:12:40,975 Keeping the mic! 239 00:12:41,887 --> 00:12:44,507 Gayle King ambushed me. You get that segment pulled before it airs. 240 00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:45,678 Miss Darnell, you're under arrest 241 00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:48,176 for insider trading and defrauding the Securities Exchange Commission. 242 00:12:49,061 --> 00:12:50,231 Are you kidding me? 243 00:12:50,312 --> 00:12:51,522 Would I kid you? 244 00:12:51,563 --> 00:12:53,023 - Claire, call my lawyer. - Okay. 245 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,186 Stay back. 246 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:56,193 What do you make a year? I'll double it. 247 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,486 Did you just try to bribe me? 248 00:12:57,528 --> 00:12:59,948 No. I mean, unless you're tempted... 249 00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:02,407 Hey! This is... 250 00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:04,741 This is not reasonable. Claire! 251 00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,156 - Don't fight it, Michelle! - Let me go! 252 00:13:06,578 --> 00:13:07,868 Ooh. Don't struggle, baby! 253 00:13:09,831 --> 00:13:11,121 Renault ratted me out! 254 00:13:11,208 --> 00:13:14,168 It's just insider trading! Everybody does it! 255 00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:16,051 You are fighting with the wrong redhead! 256 00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:20,382 Yeah. I'm out. 257 00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:22,965 I'mma get my job back at Best Buy. Boom! 258 00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:25,182 God, you're the worst. 259 00:13:25,639 --> 00:13:26,679 In breaking news... 260 00:13:27,015 --> 00:13:30,225 Michelle Darnell was sentenced to five months in federal prison 261 00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:31,730 for insider trading. 262 00:13:31,770 --> 00:13:33,900 Currently, Darnell Enterprise stocks... 263 00:13:33,981 --> 00:13:36,231 I told you you'd regret it. 264 00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,606 You can really hold onto a grudge. 265 00:13:38,694 --> 00:13:40,404 I can't believe you two used to date. 266 00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:41,735 Ah. It was the Go-Go Nineties. 267 00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:44,032 She was my yin, I was her yang. 268 00:13:44,408 --> 00:13:48,748 Our bodies were intertwined, but our spirits were in constant opposition. 269 00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:49,909 Dynamic. 270 00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:56,842 I got this promotion locked! 271 00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:58,092 Mmm-hmm. Yeah. 272 00:13:58,172 --> 00:13:59,422 Don't worry. Once I become senior VP, 273 00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:00,876 nothing's gonna change between us. 274 00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:03,894 It better not. You look so fucking rad when you do coke. 275 00:14:04,636 --> 00:14:06,716 Hey, guys! Guys! 276 00:14:06,763 --> 00:14:07,893 What? 277 00:14:07,931 --> 00:14:09,851 They're about to announce who gets the promotion. 278 00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:11,103 Pretty exciting, huh? 279 00:14:11,143 --> 00:14:12,563 Fuck off, Bryce! 280 00:14:13,103 --> 00:14:14,773 All right, listen up, everybody. 281 00:14:14,813 --> 00:14:16,113 I'd like you all to join me 282 00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:21,610 in offering a hearty congratulations to our newest senior VP. 283 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:24,029 Michelle Darnell! 284 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:25,911 Oh, my... 285 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:27,579 - What? - Oh, my God. 286 00:14:29,203 --> 00:14:30,333 I totally... 287 00:14:30,704 --> 00:14:32,754 Fuck off if you think that you can take 288 00:14:32,789 --> 00:14:34,459 my client list and I wasn't gonna notice. 289 00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:35,539 You bitch. 290 00:14:35,626 --> 00:14:38,416 Oh, thank you! That's so supportive, Ron. 291 00:14:38,462 --> 00:14:40,212 I couldn't have done it without you. 292 00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:42,131 Ron! Coffee! 293 00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:44,934 "Ron" is gone. 294 00:14:47,137 --> 00:14:48,387 End of broadcast. 295 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,310 It's bullshit, Marty. 296 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:55,853 I take one little tip from an insider 297 00:14:55,938 --> 00:14:58,268 and I find myself in an absolute hellhole. 298 00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:01,655 I mean, look at me, fighting for my life in the yard. 299 00:15:01,735 --> 00:15:03,185 Well, the news gets worse. 300 00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:05,658 - All your accounts have been frozen. - What? 301 00:15:05,948 --> 00:15:07,988 Your shareholders have all sold off. 302 00:15:08,075 --> 00:15:11,955 Renault is orchestrating a hostile takeover of your entire holding company. 303 00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:13,955 - No. - Darnell Enterprises is bankrupt. 304 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:16,667 - Can he do that? - Turn off the machine, Don. 305 00:15:16,708 --> 00:15:17,918 No, he cannot. 306 00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:20,671 Yes, he can. He actually did it beautifully. 307 00:15:26,009 --> 00:15:27,839 That's my Adam's apple, you bitch! 308 00:15:27,928 --> 00:15:29,798 Claire, get me a new lawyer. 309 00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:30,887 There's not gonna be another lawyer 310 00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:32,103 if you don't have any money, 311 00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:33,482 you stupid ginger! 312 00:15:34,268 --> 00:15:36,978 You know what? I'm a ginger, but I'm a natural redhead. 313 00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:38,520 Not that you're ever gonna find out. 314 00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:41,265 Because you will never be invited into my basement. 315 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:43,028 I don't wanna see your basement! 316 00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:44,110 Yes, you do! 317 00:15:44,194 --> 00:15:46,034 And by the way, Claire works for me. 318 00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:47,203 Actually, Michelle, 319 00:15:47,698 --> 00:15:50,198 I can't work for you anymore. I got a new job. 320 00:15:50,284 --> 00:15:52,044 I just came to tell you as a courtesy. 321 00:15:52,411 --> 00:15:54,201 I would think a courtesy would be 322 00:15:54,288 --> 00:15:56,538 you sticking with me through my tough times, Claire. 323 00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,713 I would. You know I have a kid to think about, so... 324 00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:00,172 You have a kid? 325 00:16:01,545 --> 00:16:04,015 I can't tell if you're joking because I did tell you 326 00:16:04,047 --> 00:16:06,047 - that I do have a kid. And I... - I am. 327 00:16:06,091 --> 00:16:07,091 - Remember? - Yes. 328 00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:09,546 - You do? - I am. I'm joking. I gotcha. 329 00:16:09,636 --> 00:16:10,886 - Okay. - Zinger. 330 00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:17,391 Hello, gal. I wasn't into you but I was flattered. 331 00:16:18,270 --> 00:16:21,560 Okay, here we go. Tom, do you mind grabbing that bag for me? 332 00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:23,982 Kimberly, I thought you had today off. 333 00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:25,107 Yeah, I knew you were leaving. 334 00:16:25,194 --> 00:16:26,404 You're sweet, Kimberly. 335 00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:28,146 Now, you're gonna remember what I told you? 336 00:16:28,238 --> 00:16:29,238 - Yes. - Okay? 337 00:16:29,281 --> 00:16:30,701 Stocks are gonna go up and down. 338 00:16:30,741 --> 00:16:32,451 The big money's in the long game. 339 00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:34,914 - Thank you so much, Michelle. - Thank you, Tom. You're so sweet. 340 00:16:35,913 --> 00:16:37,413 We're actually gonna miss you around here. 341 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:40,247 Well, I would hope so! It sounds right to me. 342 00:16:40,334 --> 00:16:42,504 All right, give me my freedom. 343 00:16:49,843 --> 00:16:52,433 Yep, the air is sweeter out here. 344 00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:56,637 Did you set up a ride? 345 00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:59,845 No, I was assuming that a town car or something would be provided. 346 00:16:59,937 --> 00:17:01,557 Lock it up, Danny. 347 00:17:02,773 --> 00:17:04,943 You know, she thought a town car was coming! 348 00:17:05,901 --> 00:17:07,571 Well, could you call a cab? 349 00:17:10,572 --> 00:17:11,782 I'll get one myself. 350 00:17:16,537 --> 00:17:20,167 Okay, this is my house right up here. This is good. 351 00:18:14,428 --> 00:18:15,638 Oh, come on! 352 00:18:17,598 --> 00:18:18,598 Hey! 353 00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:21,429 Can you please stop ringing the door? 354 00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:24,228 Hi. Does Claire Rawlings live here? 355 00:18:24,313 --> 00:18:25,363 I don't know. 356 00:18:25,981 --> 00:18:28,071 You don't know because you're not very bright, or... 357 00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:31,488 I'm not supposed to talk to strangers. 358 00:18:31,695 --> 00:18:33,605 You know what? Are you Claire's daughter? 359 00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,487 I thought you were in jail. 360 00:18:36,325 --> 00:18:40,505 Aren't you charming for yelling that out on the street like that. 361 00:18:41,330 --> 00:18:42,540 May I? 362 00:18:42,623 --> 00:18:43,713 No way. 363 00:18:44,166 --> 00:18:45,376 Why not? 364 00:18:45,459 --> 00:18:48,379 Because Mom's at work and you're fresh out of prison. 365 00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:52,049 Okay, white-collar crime doesn't count! 366 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,512 Yes, it does! 367 00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:55,720 No, it does not. It does not. 368 00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:08,150 - Hi. - Hi. 369 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:11,570 Whoa. 370 00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,988 Claire. Wow. 371 00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:15,196 Hi, Dana. 372 00:19:15,239 --> 00:19:18,279 My goodness, you are so late. 373 00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:19,367 I am? 374 00:19:20,077 --> 00:19:22,657 You're right. You're absolutely right, Dana. 375 00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:24,456 I'm three minutes late. 376 00:19:24,540 --> 00:19:27,250 Hey, do you work at the excuse factory? 377 00:19:27,918 --> 00:19:30,418 I wasn't making an excuse. I was just agreeing that I was a little... 378 00:19:30,504 --> 00:19:31,924 Well, I think that you're saying 379 00:19:31,964 --> 00:19:34,094 this is an excuse factory, right? 380 00:19:34,132 --> 00:19:35,592 Hey! Yo, Dana! Hey, hey, hey. 381 00:19:35,634 --> 00:19:37,224 So, hey, I wanted to tell you. 382 00:19:37,261 --> 00:19:39,141 There is a bunch of people gathered in the break room... 383 00:19:39,221 --> 00:19:40,221 What, why? 384 00:19:40,264 --> 00:19:42,024 ...just raving about your fourth-quarter review. 385 00:19:42,099 --> 00:19:43,309 Who is? What? 386 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:44,770 That's why I was late. 387 00:19:44,810 --> 00:19:48,610 Because we were all up there, you know, trading our favorite Dana stories. 388 00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:50,479 So it was... It's positive... 389 00:19:50,566 --> 00:19:51,936 It's good buzz? There's a lot of good buzz? 390 00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:53,775 Buzzworthy. Absolutely, yeah. I mean, they're raving. 391 00:19:53,819 --> 00:19:55,949 - I have to go get coffee. - Yeah, you do. 392 00:19:56,446 --> 00:19:58,106 She's a nightmare. She's a tool. 393 00:19:58,198 --> 00:19:59,618 She's so many things. 394 00:19:59,658 --> 00:20:01,618 She is definitely a lot of things. 395 00:20:01,702 --> 00:20:02,912 Uh... 396 00:20:03,328 --> 00:20:05,578 Look at this, look at this! We have so much in common, me and you. 397 00:20:05,622 --> 00:20:06,962 We have a good banter here, right? 398 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,040 A little back and forth. 399 00:20:08,125 --> 00:20:09,585 I think maybe we should 400 00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:11,536 try and keep this little banter wagon going, right? 401 00:20:11,628 --> 00:20:12,798 Maybe we can go hang out... 402 00:20:12,838 --> 00:20:16,338 We can dish about the boss, and gossip about stuff and... 403 00:20:16,884 --> 00:20:18,764 You know, probably do it over dinner or something, 404 00:20:18,802 --> 00:20:20,802 'cause all that dishing can be exhausting. 405 00:20:20,888 --> 00:20:22,348 Work up an appetite. 406 00:20:22,431 --> 00:20:25,311 Yeah, well, I'm... First of all, I'm flattered. 407 00:20:25,726 --> 00:20:26,976 It's a little complicated for me. 408 00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:30,060 I'm a single mom and I really try to, you know, 409 00:20:30,147 --> 00:20:32,147 devote a ton of energy to my kid, 410 00:20:32,191 --> 00:20:33,321 and see her as much as possible. 411 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,400 I just don't think that it's a good time. 412 00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:38,026 Yeah, cool. 413 00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:39,663 I was hoping you would say that 414 00:20:39,698 --> 00:20:41,828 because I love rejection, so... 415 00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:43,412 - Cool. - Cool. 416 00:20:43,493 --> 00:20:44,543 Sorry. 417 00:20:59,801 --> 00:21:01,681 Michelle. 418 00:21:05,557 --> 00:21:06,597 Michelle. 419 00:21:09,269 --> 00:21:11,229 - Hello. - Hi! 420 00:21:12,356 --> 00:21:14,016 Hi. Hello, Claire. 421 00:21:14,441 --> 00:21:15,531 Surprise! 422 00:21:15,609 --> 00:21:17,189 What are you doing here? 423 00:21:17,361 --> 00:21:20,321 Oh, well, I had stopped at our old office 424 00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:23,034 and the security gentlemen did mention 425 00:21:23,116 --> 00:21:26,366 that you were now the curator of my estate. 426 00:21:26,453 --> 00:21:30,003 So, I just thought I should pop over 427 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,830 and maybe pick up my things. 428 00:21:32,709 --> 00:21:35,749 Okay, I guess you wanna come up and grab it. 429 00:21:35,838 --> 00:21:37,878 - Yes, absolutely. - Do you need... 430 00:21:38,549 --> 00:21:40,879 If you'd like, you can grab that trunk. 431 00:21:40,968 --> 00:21:41,968 Oh, no. 432 00:21:47,808 --> 00:21:49,268 Well, this is just... 433 00:21:50,519 --> 00:21:51,519 This is... 434 00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:53,771 This can't be all of it. 435 00:21:53,856 --> 00:21:55,686 I mean, this isn't all of it. This is... 436 00:21:56,483 --> 00:21:58,073 Where are my things? 437 00:21:58,569 --> 00:22:02,319 My paintings, or, I mean, my Degas, my rugs, my... 438 00:22:02,823 --> 00:22:05,583 - Where are my things? - I'm really sorry, Michelle. 439 00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:07,367 They seized everything. 440 00:22:07,411 --> 00:22:08,701 This is what's left. 441 00:22:18,255 --> 00:22:20,925 Martha Stewart got everything back. 442 00:22:21,008 --> 00:22:23,588 I mean, they rallied around her. They loved her more. 443 00:22:23,677 --> 00:22:27,427 Well, Michelle, know that Rachel and I are rooting for you, 444 00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:30,564 and, if you need us, you can always call 445 00:22:30,684 --> 00:22:33,734 or send a letter here, or just a quick text. 446 00:22:34,104 --> 00:22:35,774 Um, do you want me to help you out with this? 447 00:22:37,399 --> 00:22:40,149 If she doesn't have anywhere to go, she should stay here. 448 00:22:40,235 --> 00:22:43,775 Honey, she knows plenty of people. She has plenty of places to stay. 449 00:22:44,323 --> 00:22:46,493 Tito won't return any of my calls. 450 00:22:47,034 --> 00:22:48,454 My sweet Tito. 451 00:22:49,369 --> 00:22:50,909 Fucking Tito. 452 00:22:52,247 --> 00:22:54,617 Mom, we can't let her sleep on the street. 453 00:22:54,958 --> 00:22:56,918 Do you really not have anywhere to go? 454 00:22:57,419 --> 00:22:58,999 No. I don't. 455 00:22:59,087 --> 00:23:00,957 Okay, you can stay here. 456 00:23:01,340 --> 00:23:03,800 But for a very limited amount of time. Okay? 457 00:23:03,842 --> 00:23:05,302 - Yes. - Just until you get back on your feet. 458 00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,385 - All right? - Yes. 459 00:23:06,470 --> 00:23:07,890 It's a small space. You know. 460 00:23:07,971 --> 00:23:09,891 It's tight sometimes for Rachel and I, so... 461 00:23:09,973 --> 00:23:12,893 It is really small, it's like... It's freaky small. 462 00:23:12,976 --> 00:23:15,186 Well, but you're welcome, here. 463 00:23:15,270 --> 00:23:17,980 If you need to crash, you can have the couch. 464 00:23:18,065 --> 00:23:19,985 - Yes. We'll draw straws. - Okay. 465 00:23:20,067 --> 00:23:22,147 It'll be a fun kind of roommate... 466 00:23:22,236 --> 00:23:23,276 It's not a negotiation. 467 00:23:23,403 --> 00:23:24,493 ...stuff. Okay. 468 00:23:26,406 --> 00:23:27,406 Ha. 469 00:23:27,658 --> 00:23:30,788 A bed inside a sofa. That's neat. 470 00:23:30,827 --> 00:23:33,327 Well, it's old, but it's comfortable, so... 471 00:23:33,997 --> 00:23:35,117 Thank you, Claire. 472 00:23:35,582 --> 00:23:36,712 Good night, Michelle. 473 00:23:41,755 --> 00:23:42,795 It's... 474 00:23:44,633 --> 00:23:45,683 Well... 475 00:23:48,178 --> 00:23:49,178 This isn't so... 476 00:23:50,514 --> 00:23:53,104 Oh, my God! Oh, God! 477 00:23:59,147 --> 00:24:00,227 Claire! 478 00:24:01,441 --> 00:24:04,031 I think I've shattered my pelvis. 479 00:24:16,623 --> 00:24:18,673 Oh, Michelle! Oh, my God. 480 00:24:18,709 --> 00:24:19,789 Claire! 481 00:24:19,877 --> 00:24:22,667 Michelle, why are you in my bed? 482 00:24:22,713 --> 00:24:24,883 Because your sofa threw me against a wall, 483 00:24:25,007 --> 00:24:27,177 and I've had a cellie for the last six months. 484 00:24:27,217 --> 00:24:30,047 I find it very difficult to sleep on my own. 485 00:24:30,762 --> 00:24:32,392 Wow. Okay. You're kicking up a lot of... 486 00:24:32,431 --> 00:24:34,061 Is that from... Is that me? 487 00:24:34,141 --> 00:24:35,141 I think... 488 00:24:35,225 --> 00:24:36,805 Yeah, that's me. 489 00:24:36,894 --> 00:24:38,404 You know what? I got into 490 00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:40,148 a wee bit of your Scotch last night. 491 00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:42,230 And, you know what else I tried 492 00:24:42,357 --> 00:24:44,397 that I thought was terrific, was a Dorito. 493 00:24:44,818 --> 00:24:46,028 I think it was the cheese. 494 00:24:46,069 --> 00:24:49,659 I mean not a cheese found in nature, but cheese-adjacent. 495 00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:52,240 I just thought it was wonderful. 496 00:24:52,284 --> 00:24:53,704 What a wonderful chip. 497 00:24:54,620 --> 00:24:57,910 Michelle, you can't sleep in my bed. I don't want you in here. 498 00:24:57,998 --> 00:24:59,458 You gotta get it together, Michelle. 499 00:24:59,541 --> 00:25:01,251 I am together, okay? 500 00:25:01,335 --> 00:25:04,135 This morning, I'm meeting with a bunch of old colleagues. 501 00:25:04,213 --> 00:25:07,303 I'm gonna pour this into something creamy and delicious, 502 00:25:07,382 --> 00:25:09,052 and see who takes a big sip. 503 00:25:09,092 --> 00:25:10,472 Get out, out of my bed. 504 00:25:10,552 --> 00:25:14,892 God. I see why this half of the bed maybe is empty. 505 00:25:14,932 --> 00:25:17,732 Okay? You're a real B-I-T-C-U-N-T in the morning. 506 00:25:17,768 --> 00:25:19,558 You think about that. 507 00:25:21,772 --> 00:25:23,482 Michelle, you gotta get out of the bathroom. 508 00:25:23,565 --> 00:25:26,605 I'm already late for work and Rachel's gonna be late for school. 509 00:25:26,652 --> 00:25:28,192 Well, I'm going as fast as I can. 510 00:25:28,278 --> 00:25:29,608 You're welcome to come in. 511 00:25:30,197 --> 00:25:32,737 Fine, but we gotta get on a schedule if you're gonna be here... 512 00:25:32,783 --> 00:25:33,993 Oh, my God! 513 00:25:34,743 --> 00:25:35,833 Close your robe. 514 00:25:35,953 --> 00:25:37,083 No, absolutely not! 515 00:25:37,162 --> 00:25:40,212 I'm self-tanning and my legs are still wet. 516 00:25:40,624 --> 00:25:42,384 I can see your vagina. 517 00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:44,999 Well, congratulations and you're welcome! 518 00:25:45,087 --> 00:25:47,457 You know, I had it rejuvenated in 2010. 519 00:25:47,548 --> 00:25:49,418 They call it a vaguvenation! 520 00:25:49,967 --> 00:25:52,637 You know, it's like a soft silk coin purse. 521 00:25:52,719 --> 00:25:54,299 I can barely urinate. 522 00:25:54,388 --> 00:25:55,468 Oh, my God! 523 00:25:55,556 --> 00:25:56,636 Now, do me a favor 524 00:25:56,723 --> 00:25:58,983 and tell me if I have any streaks on my hamstrings. 525 00:25:59,017 --> 00:26:00,187 Oh, God! Put it away! 526 00:26:00,394 --> 00:26:01,524 - Whoa. - Put it away. 527 00:26:02,062 --> 00:26:03,772 Hi, Raquel! 528 00:26:03,814 --> 00:26:04,944 It's Rachel! 529 00:26:04,982 --> 00:26:06,072 Go grab your backpack, honey. 530 00:26:06,149 --> 00:26:08,529 We don't need to brush our teeth today. Our teeth are fine. 531 00:26:09,319 --> 00:26:12,319 You need to wipe some of that off your face. You know it dries darker? 532 00:26:12,406 --> 00:26:13,986 - No, does it? - Yes. 533 00:26:14,074 --> 00:26:15,914 But that's not what the bottle says. 534 00:26:17,286 --> 00:26:20,656 Oh, it's okay. It's coming off like a dream on your towel. 535 00:26:20,706 --> 00:26:21,866 You need to clean up the bathroom. 536 00:26:22,374 --> 00:26:25,924 And consider staying away from self-tanner altogether. 537 00:26:26,003 --> 00:26:28,883 Your pelvic region is the color of curry. 538 00:26:30,174 --> 00:26:32,094 Namaste, Claire. Thank you. 539 00:26:32,176 --> 00:26:33,336 It's not a compliment. 540 00:26:33,468 --> 00:26:34,468 Oh. 541 00:26:39,474 --> 00:26:41,394 All right, here's a little joke for everybody. 542 00:26:41,476 --> 00:26:44,436 What do golfers do on their day off? 543 00:26:45,189 --> 00:26:46,189 Putter around. 544 00:26:51,737 --> 00:26:53,607 Tom, I'm gonna crunch those numbers for you, 545 00:26:53,697 --> 00:26:55,567 but I'm going to make you pay through the teeth. 546 00:26:56,241 --> 00:26:57,451 Oh. 547 00:26:57,534 --> 00:26:58,744 Bryce Crean! 548 00:26:58,827 --> 00:27:01,867 Oh, my God! How long has it been? 549 00:27:02,206 --> 00:27:04,866 You old son of a bitch! It has been too long! 550 00:27:04,917 --> 00:27:07,127 Terri. Hello, gentlemen. Hi... 551 00:27:07,711 --> 00:27:08,751 Carl. 552 00:27:08,962 --> 00:27:10,462 Oh. Look at that beard. 553 00:27:10,547 --> 00:27:12,967 How's that old ball-and-chain Pam treatin' ya? 554 00:27:14,009 --> 00:27:15,719 Pam passed away four months ago. 555 00:27:17,054 --> 00:27:19,894 That's tough. That's tough. 556 00:27:19,973 --> 00:27:21,733 We're kind of in the middle of something here, Michelle. 557 00:27:21,808 --> 00:27:23,058 So, thank you very much. 558 00:27:23,685 --> 00:27:27,555 Word on the street, Bryce, is that you're just about to close on that Kraft deal. 559 00:27:27,648 --> 00:27:30,188 So if you want me to head up that division... 560 00:27:30,234 --> 00:27:34,244 I think I could be a pretty big asset to you on that account. 561 00:27:34,863 --> 00:27:37,573 You've got no capital and nobody likes you. 562 00:27:37,616 --> 00:27:39,406 Nobody here at this table likes you. 563 00:27:39,493 --> 00:27:42,083 - Nobody at this entire club likes you. - That's not true. 564 00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:44,160 Horrible, horrible feedback from everybody. 565 00:27:44,498 --> 00:27:47,748 So, thank you for the groveling. Good bye! 566 00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:51,170 Fuck off, Bryce. 567 00:27:51,505 --> 00:27:53,015 Yeah. You know what? 568 00:27:53,632 --> 00:27:54,922 You wouldn't even be here 569 00:27:55,008 --> 00:27:57,218 if I hadn't brought you in as a junior executive. 570 00:27:57,261 --> 00:27:59,931 And, Terri, you think anybody else would've hired you right out of college? 571 00:27:59,972 --> 00:28:01,852 No! I don't who the fuck you three are. 572 00:28:01,932 --> 00:28:02,932 But I'll guess this. 573 00:28:03,016 --> 00:28:05,096 I bet you got here climbing on my back somehow. 574 00:28:05,143 --> 00:28:07,103 Carl, I gave you that Landis account. 575 00:28:07,187 --> 00:28:11,437 I handed you your career and I'm the one that made Pam a sales rep! 576 00:28:11,483 --> 00:28:12,613 Pam is dead. 577 00:28:12,693 --> 00:28:14,113 Pam was a whore! 578 00:28:14,194 --> 00:28:16,784 She fucked her way through the whole IT department. 579 00:28:16,864 --> 00:28:18,994 And Terri knows it, 'cause you were in on it, too! 580 00:28:19,324 --> 00:28:20,784 - Yeah! - The tech guys? 581 00:28:20,868 --> 00:28:22,408 You think Pam did all the tech guys? 582 00:28:22,452 --> 00:28:26,082 The lowest, weirdest, saddest guys! 583 00:28:26,164 --> 00:28:27,464 That's who Pam fucked! 584 00:28:27,541 --> 00:28:29,041 Go to hell, Michelle! Go to hell! 585 00:28:29,126 --> 00:28:31,956 When I get to hell, I'll tell Pam that you said hello, 586 00:28:32,004 --> 00:28:34,134 'cause she's probably down there fucking IT guys. 587 00:28:34,173 --> 00:28:38,473 Weird little guys, carrying wires around in weird hats. 588 00:28:38,510 --> 00:28:40,050 That's who she's fucking in hell. 589 00:28:40,137 --> 00:28:41,137 Yeah. 590 00:28:41,388 --> 00:28:42,598 I don't need you. 591 00:28:42,639 --> 00:28:45,309 I don't need you and you're gonna be sorry. 592 00:28:45,350 --> 00:28:48,400 'Cause I got a sweet deal for you and you're letting it walk out. 593 00:28:48,478 --> 00:28:50,978 You know, you want to be dumbasses? Be my guest. 594 00:28:51,023 --> 00:28:53,193 I'll tell you what, you're gonna regret this. 595 00:28:53,734 --> 00:28:54,864 Yow! 596 00:28:56,653 --> 00:28:58,703 Yow! Son of a bitch! 597 00:29:00,657 --> 00:29:02,327 - Holy shit! - Son of a bitch! 598 00:29:02,409 --> 00:29:03,829 How'd she survive that? 599 00:29:03,911 --> 00:29:05,581 'Cause she's horrible. 600 00:29:05,662 --> 00:29:06,752 Let's go. 601 00:29:06,830 --> 00:29:08,330 Mother of shite! 602 00:29:09,833 --> 00:29:11,293 I dinged my pelvis again. 603 00:29:18,467 --> 00:29:19,467 Ah. 604 00:29:21,178 --> 00:29:22,598 - Tell me everything. - Okay. 605 00:29:22,679 --> 00:29:26,929 So, right off the top, Bryce ordered a Nicoise salad 606 00:29:27,017 --> 00:29:29,437 but he asked for the tuna to be really well done. 607 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:31,860 But if it's a quality piece of tuna, you don't wanna have it... 608 00:29:31,897 --> 00:29:33,857 - Not relevant. - Okay, right. 609 00:29:34,983 --> 00:29:37,403 Bryce did everything you asked him to do. 610 00:29:37,486 --> 00:29:38,606 Michelle came in. She was like, 611 00:29:38,695 --> 00:29:39,815 "I wanna be in a business." 612 00:29:39,863 --> 00:29:41,493 And he was like, "No dice." 613 00:29:41,532 --> 00:29:44,202 And then, she fell down a flight of stairs. 614 00:29:44,243 --> 00:29:46,333 Did she hurt her wonderful body? 615 00:29:46,370 --> 00:29:48,250 I have a video of it. Do you wanna see? 616 00:29:50,541 --> 00:29:51,541 I'll tell you what. 617 00:29:51,959 --> 00:29:53,129 - Oh, look at her. - Mmm-hmm. 618 00:29:53,961 --> 00:29:55,091 Oh. 619 00:29:58,799 --> 00:30:00,299 Oh. 620 00:30:02,386 --> 00:30:04,006 So you see the normal intestine. 621 00:30:04,388 --> 00:30:07,518 Now, notice the difference between that intestine and this intestine. 622 00:30:07,558 --> 00:30:10,728 I'm getting light-headed. Is there any of that brownie left? 623 00:30:10,769 --> 00:30:12,649 - Yeah. - I feel like my blood sugar's dropping. 624 00:30:12,729 --> 00:30:15,689 I should probably pop it with a little sugar. 625 00:30:17,442 --> 00:30:20,742 Holy shit! That is a good brownie. 626 00:30:20,779 --> 00:30:21,779 Language. 627 00:30:21,864 --> 00:30:23,744 Well, I'm sorry, you give me a holy-shit brownie. 628 00:30:23,782 --> 00:30:24,992 I'm gonna say, "Holy shit!" 629 00:30:25,075 --> 00:30:28,995 'Cause holy shit, this is a good brownie. 630 00:30:29,079 --> 00:30:31,409 I can't believe... Your mom makes these, right? 631 00:30:31,456 --> 00:30:33,376 Yeah, it's a family recipe. 632 00:30:33,750 --> 00:30:34,830 Hi! 633 00:30:36,628 --> 00:30:39,508 I'm pretty sure Michelle has diverticulitis. 634 00:30:39,590 --> 00:30:40,920 - What? - I got it. 635 00:30:41,758 --> 00:30:43,588 I think it's pretty advanced, Claire. 636 00:30:43,635 --> 00:30:44,925 Who said that? 637 00:30:44,970 --> 00:30:46,010 Doctor Oz. 638 00:30:46,096 --> 00:30:47,256 Look. 639 00:30:47,389 --> 00:30:48,559 Oh, my God! 640 00:30:48,599 --> 00:30:50,229 There's my colon again. 641 00:30:50,267 --> 00:30:53,097 Okay, you need to get off the couch 642 00:30:53,145 --> 00:30:55,525 because you've been laying down for about three weeks. 643 00:30:55,606 --> 00:30:58,066 And, also, you have to start pulling your weight around here. 644 00:30:58,108 --> 00:30:59,278 We can start tonight. 645 00:30:59,318 --> 00:31:01,438 You can take Rachel to her Dandelions meeting. 646 00:31:01,528 --> 00:31:03,448 - What? - Why aren't you taking me? 647 00:31:03,530 --> 00:31:04,530 Sweetie, I can't. 648 00:31:04,615 --> 00:31:08,875 My boss, who is a massive fan of yours, by the way, 649 00:31:08,952 --> 00:31:11,202 has decided I need to go back in for the evening. 650 00:31:11,288 --> 00:31:12,288 Okay? 651 00:31:12,372 --> 00:31:16,292 Let's go! The most important part of the plan being "get off the couch." 652 00:31:18,879 --> 00:31:21,459 I don't think I like sassy Claire. 653 00:31:23,634 --> 00:31:26,394 All right. I want you to give me the lowdown on this meeting. 654 00:31:26,470 --> 00:31:28,560 What are my opportunities? What are my pitfalls? 655 00:31:28,639 --> 00:31:29,929 What do you mean? 656 00:31:30,015 --> 00:31:32,225 Well, I want to know what I'm walking into. 657 00:31:32,392 --> 00:31:34,352 Oh, everyone's pretty nice. 658 00:31:35,521 --> 00:31:40,281 I forgot how many people ride the "L." It's kind of fascinating. 659 00:31:40,317 --> 00:31:44,237 Some people depend on this. Like, they don't have a car. 660 00:31:44,905 --> 00:31:45,955 Well, I know that. 661 00:31:47,366 --> 00:31:49,326 Roller-skating or roller-blading? 662 00:31:50,244 --> 00:31:51,334 Roller-blading. 663 00:31:51,370 --> 00:31:53,080 Honey or agave nectar? 664 00:31:53,163 --> 00:31:54,833 - Agave. - No, they're both terrible. 665 00:31:55,249 --> 00:31:57,169 Cell phone, landline? 666 00:31:57,209 --> 00:31:59,419 - What? - Oh, God. 667 00:31:59,878 --> 00:32:01,588 Do you not know what that means? 668 00:32:01,672 --> 00:32:03,632 - No. - Oh, Jesus. 669 00:32:04,258 --> 00:32:06,508 Okay, this should be interesting. 670 00:32:07,845 --> 00:32:11,225 Ladies, big news. Great news. 671 00:32:12,015 --> 00:32:16,225 Marsha Swan's tabby cat, Spaghetti, is on the mend 672 00:32:16,311 --> 00:32:19,521 and expected to make a full recovery. 673 00:32:19,565 --> 00:32:20,825 Yay, Spaghetti! 674 00:32:23,402 --> 00:32:24,532 Yay! 675 00:32:25,946 --> 00:32:28,776 My daughter, Beth, was so worried about Spaghetti. 676 00:32:28,866 --> 00:32:30,826 Thank goodness she's back on her feet. 677 00:32:30,868 --> 00:32:33,868 Funny fact about Spaghetti, she hates spaghetti. 678 00:32:34,371 --> 00:32:36,211 You seem fucking crazy to me. 679 00:32:36,290 --> 00:32:37,290 Excuse me? 680 00:32:37,374 --> 00:32:38,964 Cute as a daisy to me. 681 00:32:39,793 --> 00:32:42,003 Okay, now, not to sound too kookie, 682 00:32:42,045 --> 00:32:44,875 but let's talk "cookie" sales, that is. 683 00:32:48,218 --> 00:32:52,468 Okay, so this year, we came in with $21,000. 684 00:32:52,723 --> 00:32:54,563 Pretty good job, big bucks. 685 00:32:54,600 --> 00:33:00,400 But Detroit is still in the lead for the year with $189,000. 686 00:33:00,856 --> 00:33:02,516 Can I just ask you, are these numbers 687 00:33:02,649 --> 00:33:04,319 you're talking about just cookie sales? 688 00:33:04,401 --> 00:33:07,361 And, if so, how many troupes are we talking about here? 689 00:33:07,821 --> 00:33:13,081 There are 3.2 million Dandelions all over the world 690 00:33:13,118 --> 00:33:16,198 blown across the earth, making a difference. 691 00:33:16,246 --> 00:33:17,406 Is this global? 692 00:33:17,873 --> 00:33:21,213 Wait, I recognize you. You're Michelle Darnell. 693 00:33:21,251 --> 00:33:23,041 Please, don't make a fuss. 694 00:33:23,086 --> 00:33:24,586 Oh, I'm gonna make a fuss. 695 00:33:24,630 --> 00:33:27,470 You're a convicted felon sitting in a room full of children. 696 00:33:27,549 --> 00:33:28,759 You're a criminal. 697 00:33:28,842 --> 00:33:30,222 It was white-collar crime. 698 00:33:30,260 --> 00:33:31,930 Okay, you don't have to defend me. 699 00:33:31,970 --> 00:33:33,260 You're such a loser. 700 00:33:33,722 --> 00:33:35,352 I'm sorry, what did he say? 701 00:33:35,724 --> 00:33:36,774 What? 702 00:33:36,808 --> 00:33:38,058 - Well, I would... - Yeah. 703 00:33:38,101 --> 00:33:39,691 Excuse me. Hi. 704 00:33:39,770 --> 00:33:40,900 I gotta ask you. 705 00:33:40,938 --> 00:33:44,688 Now are we talking part-time or full-time employees here? 706 00:33:44,775 --> 00:33:47,695 Nope, just happy volunteers. 707 00:33:47,778 --> 00:33:48,778 What? 708 00:33:48,862 --> 00:33:50,702 For your information, jailbird... 709 00:33:51,198 --> 00:33:52,528 She seems great. 710 00:33:52,616 --> 00:33:54,946 The Dandelions helps girls build leadership skills. 711 00:33:54,993 --> 00:33:56,833 It looks good on their high-school transcript 712 00:33:56,912 --> 00:33:58,462 and they are bettering their community, 713 00:33:58,580 --> 00:34:00,080 which is more than I can say for you. 714 00:34:00,165 --> 00:34:02,245 A-ha. What is your name? 715 00:34:02,292 --> 00:34:03,542 Helen Kreagan. 716 00:34:03,627 --> 00:34:06,297 Oh, you know what? I think you dropped something right here. 717 00:34:06,338 --> 00:34:07,958 - You go fuck yourself. - Go fuck yourself. 718 00:34:08,465 --> 00:34:09,585 Go fuck yourself. 719 00:34:09,967 --> 00:34:11,627 I don't think you know who you're talking to. 720 00:34:11,677 --> 00:34:14,217 I think I do. And I think I want you to fuck off. 721 00:34:14,304 --> 00:34:15,354 I don't think you do. 722 00:34:17,391 --> 00:34:18,391 Oh, my gosh! 723 00:34:19,685 --> 00:34:22,985 Can we just take a minute and give congrats to Sarah, here? 724 00:34:24,606 --> 00:34:27,606 Thank you. It's Sandy. It's Sandy. 725 00:34:27,651 --> 00:34:29,321 - Or Sandy. - I like Sarah. 726 00:34:29,361 --> 00:34:30,741 Whatever, either one. 727 00:34:30,821 --> 00:34:33,991 I gotta know how much are you selling these boxes for? 728 00:34:34,449 --> 00:34:36,789 - Girls. - $7. 729 00:34:36,827 --> 00:34:37,987 $7? 730 00:34:38,495 --> 00:34:39,785 Ka-ching, right? 731 00:34:39,830 --> 00:34:43,830 I got a guy in Shanghai who can make this same box of cookies, 19 cents. 732 00:34:43,917 --> 00:34:46,247 This is an official meeting and you're interrupting it. 733 00:34:46,336 --> 00:34:47,956 Let's take a poll, show of hands. 734 00:34:48,088 --> 00:34:49,708 Who finds Helen to be a bummer? 735 00:34:51,633 --> 00:34:53,683 Lots of hands. Oh, Helen. 736 00:34:53,927 --> 00:34:55,467 Toot. 737 00:34:57,014 --> 00:34:58,684 Do something, Mom. 738 00:34:59,266 --> 00:35:01,886 I object to parolees attending our meetings 739 00:35:01,977 --> 00:35:03,397 and I'd like to put that in the minutes. 740 00:35:03,854 --> 00:35:05,024 May I? 741 00:35:05,105 --> 00:35:06,605 Let me just handle this. 742 00:35:06,690 --> 00:35:08,690 Another great point by Helen. 743 00:35:08,775 --> 00:35:09,935 You know what, Helen? 744 00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:11,527 If you don't get off my fucking back, 745 00:35:11,612 --> 00:35:14,822 I'm gonna shove a box of chocolate clusters up that tight ass of yours. 746 00:35:16,283 --> 00:35:17,283 Oh. 747 00:35:17,743 --> 00:35:19,373 I would love to go to lunch. 748 00:35:19,411 --> 00:35:23,501 You're on. You got yourself a date. That sounds terrific, okay? 749 00:35:23,707 --> 00:35:25,577 Sandy, I love that kerchief. 750 00:35:25,667 --> 00:35:26,667 Was that necessary? 751 00:35:26,752 --> 00:35:28,252 - Super necessary. - Yeah. 752 00:35:43,393 --> 00:35:44,733 Michelle? 753 00:35:45,103 --> 00:35:46,233 - Hi! - What are you doing? 754 00:35:46,313 --> 00:35:47,563 What is all this? 755 00:35:47,606 --> 00:35:49,146 This is my way back, m'kay? 756 00:35:49,233 --> 00:35:51,613 You are looking at Darnell 2.0. 757 00:35:51,693 --> 00:35:53,363 I wondered when you were getting up. 758 00:35:53,570 --> 00:35:55,240 Have you not gone to bed yet? 759 00:35:55,322 --> 00:35:57,072 No, I have been up and percolating 760 00:35:57,157 --> 00:35:58,987 since 11:00 p.m. last night. 761 00:35:59,076 --> 00:36:01,036 - Just great stuff, Claire! - Okay. 762 00:36:01,078 --> 00:36:02,248 You're having a breakdown. 763 00:36:02,287 --> 00:36:05,787 No, no, no! I'm having a breakthrough, because of you. 764 00:36:05,874 --> 00:36:07,674 Sit down, I gotta show you this. 765 00:36:07,751 --> 00:36:12,261 Let me introduce you to my new golden goose... 766 00:36:14,091 --> 00:36:16,431 Darnell's Darlings. 767 00:36:16,510 --> 00:36:17,680 Rough sketches. 768 00:36:17,761 --> 00:36:19,301 So, I know. Those will be perfected. 769 00:36:19,388 --> 00:36:21,928 But, really, tell me, what's your initial thoughts? 770 00:36:23,433 --> 00:36:25,193 - Stalin. - Okay. 771 00:36:25,269 --> 00:36:27,019 - Communist youth. - All right! 772 00:36:27,437 --> 00:36:30,107 Japanese-y black power? 773 00:36:30,190 --> 00:36:32,730 My takeaway from that is "powerful." 774 00:36:33,110 --> 00:36:35,740 Powerful imagery and I'll take that any day of the week. 775 00:36:36,947 --> 00:36:37,987 Why are you up? 776 00:36:38,115 --> 00:36:40,415 Sit down, sleepyhead. Let's wake it up. 777 00:36:41,702 --> 00:36:43,912 Claire, we're gonna start a brownie company. 778 00:36:43,954 --> 00:36:46,754 No, we're gonna start a brownie empire. 779 00:36:46,790 --> 00:36:49,330 Okay? And we're gonna call it Darnell's Darlings. 780 00:36:49,793 --> 00:36:52,843 Illinois alone has 25,000 Dandelions. 781 00:36:52,921 --> 00:36:57,801 They're pulling in, in one year, $32,500,000. 782 00:36:58,135 --> 00:37:00,015 This is a global company. 783 00:37:00,095 --> 00:37:02,635 The Dandelions are making a billion dollars a year. 784 00:37:03,015 --> 00:37:06,145 Is that going in your pocket? Helen's probably pocketing it. 785 00:37:06,226 --> 00:37:10,056 I mean, that horrible bitch would take teeth right out of a kid. Am I wrong? 786 00:37:10,314 --> 00:37:13,654 If she could sell teeth, she'd rip kids' teeth out. 787 00:37:14,234 --> 00:37:16,744 I'm gonna let it go, but Helen's horrible. 788 00:37:16,820 --> 00:37:18,700 The Dandelions are a non-profit, Michelle. 789 00:37:18,780 --> 00:37:20,910 That money goes back into great programs for the girls. 790 00:37:20,991 --> 00:37:22,831 Oh, great programs? That's interesting. 791 00:37:22,910 --> 00:37:24,990 Rachel, do me a favor. 792 00:37:25,037 --> 00:37:28,537 Tell your mom what was the last "great program" you completed. 793 00:37:28,749 --> 00:37:30,329 Go ahead, go ahead. 794 00:37:30,417 --> 00:37:33,497 Scout leader Sandy gave me a "Social Butterfly" badge. 795 00:37:33,545 --> 00:37:34,745 That's great! 796 00:37:35,088 --> 00:37:37,298 Tell her what a "Social Butterfly" badge is. 797 00:37:37,341 --> 00:37:41,851 I had to hold a conversation with a new person for 30 minutes... 798 00:37:42,304 --> 00:37:43,514 - Okay. - ...and demonstrate 799 00:37:43,555 --> 00:37:45,095 how to be a good hostess. 800 00:37:45,849 --> 00:37:48,729 Next week, I'm thinking maybe they'll arrange marriages. 801 00:37:49,019 --> 00:37:50,979 I'll tell you what, I'm gonna design 802 00:37:51,104 --> 00:37:53,064 a special new badge for the Dandelions. 803 00:37:53,148 --> 00:37:56,028 It's gonna be a real big one, so no one misses it. 804 00:37:56,068 --> 00:37:57,858 And I'm gonna make it a picture of a woman. 805 00:37:57,903 --> 00:38:01,873 A real sad woman with apron strings on, bent over in front of an oven. 806 00:38:01,949 --> 00:38:05,289 And it's gonna say, "You know why we like vaginas better than your mouth? 807 00:38:05,369 --> 00:38:07,539 "Because they don't have teeth and they don't talk." 808 00:38:07,788 --> 00:38:10,168 And you could turn that badge over and you're gonna realize 809 00:38:10,207 --> 00:38:12,627 that there's a man in the oven and she's giving him a blowjob. 810 00:38:13,085 --> 00:38:14,175 Good luck earning that! 811 00:38:14,211 --> 00:38:15,381 Michelle! 812 00:38:15,629 --> 00:38:17,339 I heard everything anyways. 813 00:38:17,714 --> 00:38:19,764 These girls are gonna earn some real money 814 00:38:19,842 --> 00:38:21,682 that can go towards a college fund, 815 00:38:22,052 --> 00:38:25,722 give them empowerment, give them a good sense of self. 816 00:38:25,764 --> 00:38:27,684 I find that exciting, Claire. 817 00:38:28,141 --> 00:38:30,061 It's a nice idea, Michelle, 818 00:38:30,143 --> 00:38:33,063 but it's also a crazy one. 819 00:38:33,105 --> 00:38:35,075 Claire, I want you to listen to me. 820 00:38:37,401 --> 00:38:39,651 You have an amazing product. 821 00:38:39,736 --> 00:38:42,486 - You make a mind-blowing brownie. - Okay. 822 00:38:42,573 --> 00:38:46,703 And I can sell anything I believe in, and I believe in your product. 823 00:38:47,077 --> 00:38:50,457 We can be partners. Not my assistant. Fifty-fifty. 824 00:38:50,789 --> 00:38:53,419 That's how much I believe in this. What do you say? 825 00:38:55,127 --> 00:38:56,877 I have to keep my job, Michelle. 826 00:38:57,004 --> 00:38:58,764 This is... It's just too risky. 827 00:38:59,548 --> 00:39:01,048 Come on. 828 00:39:01,592 --> 00:39:03,592 You don't even like your job, Mom. 829 00:39:04,469 --> 00:39:06,429 Oh, that was beautiful timing. 830 00:39:06,471 --> 00:39:07,641 I didn't even set that up. 831 00:39:08,432 --> 00:39:10,602 You know what, Claire? Keep your terrible job. 832 00:39:10,642 --> 00:39:12,442 Do this on the side. 833 00:39:13,103 --> 00:39:15,813 Okay? Plus, it's gonna get me off your couch. 834 00:39:15,898 --> 00:39:16,938 I'm in. 835 00:39:17,441 --> 00:39:18,441 - You're in? - Mmm-hmm. 836 00:39:18,942 --> 00:39:20,032 Let's do it, people! 837 00:39:20,110 --> 00:39:22,110 Okay, Rachel, you go get dressed. 838 00:39:22,154 --> 00:39:24,454 I'm gonna take you to school. We're gonna get some new recruits! 839 00:39:24,531 --> 00:39:26,951 It's 4:00 a.m. I'm going back to bed. 840 00:39:26,992 --> 00:39:28,122 Night, sweetie. 841 00:39:28,202 --> 00:39:29,452 What? Okay, you know what? 842 00:39:29,536 --> 00:39:31,616 You get your rest, you're gonna need it! 843 00:39:31,663 --> 00:39:34,253 We gotta recruit some Darnell Darlings today! 844 00:39:34,291 --> 00:39:36,131 Claire, my quarterback, 845 00:39:36,210 --> 00:39:37,960 I need you to bust ass into that kitchen 846 00:39:38,045 --> 00:39:40,635 and start making pan after pan after pan of brownies, 847 00:39:40,714 --> 00:39:42,924 'cause that's how fast I'm gonna sell 'em, okay? 848 00:39:42,966 --> 00:39:44,796 - Right now? - Right now! All right? 849 00:39:44,885 --> 00:39:46,895 I may have tried to preheat that oven, 850 00:39:47,012 --> 00:39:49,012 so I think there's a little bit of a gas leak. 851 00:39:49,097 --> 00:39:50,467 - Huh? - If you think about it, it may be 852 00:39:50,641 --> 00:39:52,021 why you guys are feeling a little logy. 853 00:39:52,142 --> 00:39:55,312 Hey, Rach, you know what? Don't go to sleep! Don't go to sleep! 854 00:39:55,395 --> 00:39:56,395 Oh, my God! 855 00:39:57,314 --> 00:39:59,404 Okay. We may have to walk her. 856 00:40:02,945 --> 00:40:04,245 Ah. You know what? 857 00:40:04,321 --> 00:40:07,321 It feels good to kind of put the shine and polish back on again. 858 00:40:07,991 --> 00:40:10,331 People say it doesn't matter, but it does. 859 00:40:10,369 --> 00:40:13,159 Puts a little kick in your step. 860 00:40:15,582 --> 00:40:17,082 Who is that beast? 861 00:40:17,543 --> 00:40:19,593 That's Chrystal Delveccio. 862 00:40:19,670 --> 00:40:21,840 She's always getting into fist fights. 863 00:40:22,381 --> 00:40:24,341 - Later, Dad. - That's perfect. 864 00:40:24,675 --> 00:40:26,685 That is exactly the kind of gal we want to recruit. 865 00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:28,300 You know what? Another little tip. 866 00:40:28,345 --> 00:40:30,965 Look for girls that are named after precious stones. 867 00:40:31,014 --> 00:40:33,774 Topaz, Sapphire, Opal, Amber. 868 00:40:34,059 --> 00:40:35,229 They're all gonna spiral down. 869 00:40:35,310 --> 00:40:38,020 We want to get 'em when they're angry and fresh going in. 870 00:40:38,105 --> 00:40:40,405 Why don't you check out Chrystal's availability? 871 00:40:40,732 --> 00:40:41,732 Got it. 872 00:40:45,070 --> 00:40:47,030 My mom never lets me drink coffee. 873 00:40:47,114 --> 00:40:49,124 Really, why? 874 00:40:49,575 --> 00:40:51,165 She says it'll stunt your growth. 875 00:40:51,201 --> 00:40:52,911 That's not true. That's crazy. 876 00:40:53,245 --> 00:40:55,335 What, do you wanna be freakishly tall? 877 00:40:57,624 --> 00:41:00,174 All right. Get in there, drum up some good recruits. 878 00:41:00,878 --> 00:41:02,878 I feel kind of sweaty and scared. 879 00:41:02,963 --> 00:41:04,843 That's just the coffee kickin' in. It's good for... 880 00:41:04,882 --> 00:41:07,722 Oh, you know what? Wait a minute, let me see something. 881 00:41:09,386 --> 00:41:10,886 Oh, I may have switched them. 882 00:41:10,929 --> 00:41:13,389 This one's yours. I put a little splash of bourbon in mine. 883 00:41:13,473 --> 00:41:14,643 That's okay. 884 00:41:15,475 --> 00:41:16,725 It's kind of a secret weapon. 885 00:41:17,269 --> 00:41:18,899 It's what makes the Irish so mean. 886 00:41:19,021 --> 00:41:20,611 And I can say that 'cause I'm Scottish! 887 00:41:21,398 --> 00:41:22,568 Go get 'em! 888 00:41:24,109 --> 00:41:27,649 And so, due to some unforeseen complications, 889 00:41:27,738 --> 00:41:29,568 and just, um... 890 00:41:30,032 --> 00:41:31,242 Giving up... 891 00:41:31,325 --> 00:41:33,415 Spaghetti passed away last night. 892 00:41:33,493 --> 00:41:35,083 Listen up, motherfuckers! 893 00:41:35,120 --> 00:41:36,160 Michelle, language! 894 00:41:36,246 --> 00:41:37,656 Who here wants to hear about 895 00:41:37,748 --> 00:41:39,828 an un-freaking-believably exciting opportunity? 896 00:41:40,083 --> 00:41:41,083 Huh? 897 00:41:41,585 --> 00:41:43,385 All right! Woo! Look at this group! 898 00:41:44,296 --> 00:41:46,126 All right. What's with all the long faces? 899 00:41:46,215 --> 00:41:47,515 Did somebody die? 900 00:41:47,591 --> 00:41:50,431 Yeah. Spaghetti died last night. 901 00:41:50,511 --> 00:41:51,761 Who is Spaghetti? 902 00:41:51,845 --> 00:41:53,005 The cat. 903 00:41:53,096 --> 00:41:55,096 The cat? Oh. Can I be honest? 904 00:41:55,182 --> 00:41:57,642 That cat probably killed himself because his name was "Spaghetti." 905 00:41:57,768 --> 00:41:58,768 Right? Hey-oh! 906 00:41:58,810 --> 00:41:59,940 - Michelle. - Oh... 907 00:42:00,771 --> 00:42:03,231 All right, okay. Why don't you take off, Sandy? 908 00:42:03,273 --> 00:42:04,483 It's my meeting and I'm... 909 00:42:04,608 --> 00:42:05,858 Okay. 910 00:42:05,943 --> 00:42:07,443 Go catch it. Go catch it. 911 00:42:07,528 --> 00:42:08,818 Really sorry about your loss. 912 00:42:09,154 --> 00:42:11,534 As you already know, my name is Michelle Darnell 913 00:42:11,615 --> 00:42:12,625 and this is my partner. 914 00:42:12,741 --> 00:42:15,911 And by "partner," I don't mean like girl-on-girl kind of stuff. 915 00:42:16,036 --> 00:42:18,286 - Whoa! - What's "girl-on-girl stuff"? 916 00:42:18,956 --> 00:42:21,166 Uh, well, great question. I love an inquisitive mind. 917 00:42:21,250 --> 00:42:23,290 Girl-on-girl stuff is really just referring to 918 00:42:23,377 --> 00:42:25,917 something you're probably gonna dabble with in college, 919 00:42:26,004 --> 00:42:27,094 but not stick with, you know? 920 00:42:27,130 --> 00:42:28,170 Let's not... Don't tell her that. 921 00:42:28,257 --> 00:42:29,337 Unless you're Hannah. 922 00:42:29,424 --> 00:42:30,764 Hannah, you're gonna stick with it. 923 00:42:30,843 --> 00:42:31,843 Don't... You know what? Let's... 924 00:42:31,927 --> 00:42:34,467 And I got a hunch that your mom should've stuck with it. 925 00:42:34,513 --> 00:42:36,143 She wouldn't be so pent-up and angry. 926 00:42:36,473 --> 00:42:37,473 That's my hunch. 927 00:42:37,558 --> 00:42:38,638 Let's change the subject. 928 00:42:38,725 --> 00:42:42,645 We brought you guys some delicious homemade brownie treats. 929 00:42:42,688 --> 00:42:45,648 Ooh. Look at this! We brought treats, everybody! Treats! 930 00:42:45,732 --> 00:42:47,442 Let me ask you one question. 931 00:42:47,484 --> 00:42:49,864 When you sell a box of cookies, what do you get? 932 00:42:49,945 --> 00:42:52,825 You get points that can apply to your canoe trip. 933 00:42:52,865 --> 00:42:55,375 Wrong, you get a big plate of bullshit! 934 00:42:55,868 --> 00:42:58,698 That is 100% right, you beautiful giant! 935 00:42:58,787 --> 00:43:01,327 Now, at Darnell's Darlings, we don't think that's right. 936 00:43:01,373 --> 00:43:03,833 We think if you go out and sell a box of cookies, 937 00:43:03,876 --> 00:43:05,376 we should give you 5% commission. 938 00:43:05,669 --> 00:43:07,709 5% commission, every box you sell. 939 00:43:07,796 --> 00:43:09,376 It was supposed to be 10%, I think. 940 00:43:09,715 --> 00:43:11,385 - That's right, we did say that. - Yeah. 941 00:43:11,466 --> 00:43:13,756 So far, you suck at this. Just letting you know that. 942 00:43:13,844 --> 00:43:15,514 Okay, it's 10%. 943 00:43:15,596 --> 00:43:18,136 You come work with us, you get a share of the profits. 944 00:43:18,682 --> 00:43:19,972 Okay. Or you can stay here! 945 00:43:20,017 --> 00:43:21,597 Be my guest and, I don't know, build some 946 00:43:21,685 --> 00:43:23,975 dirty badger nests in some kind of tree. 947 00:43:24,062 --> 00:43:25,862 Or what did you have planned, Sandy? 948 00:43:26,356 --> 00:43:29,776 Well, actually, we were gonna build a dirty badger nest in a tree. 949 00:43:30,777 --> 00:43:32,447 My God. 950 00:43:32,529 --> 00:43:34,529 My God! And I was making that up. 951 00:43:34,615 --> 00:43:38,665 I was trying to think of the worst possible scenario on Earth. 952 00:43:38,702 --> 00:43:40,412 What the hell is going on in here? 953 00:43:40,704 --> 00:43:43,044 I leave the room for one minute to talk to my landscaper 954 00:43:43,123 --> 00:43:44,623 and the meeting goes into the toilet? 955 00:43:44,875 --> 00:43:46,295 Sorry, Helen, we're almost done. 956 00:43:46,376 --> 00:43:49,206 Okay, you guys, the best part about Darnell's Darlings 957 00:43:49,296 --> 00:43:52,216 is that, for each box sold, an extra 10% 958 00:43:52,299 --> 00:43:54,429 will go into a college fund for you. Okay? 959 00:43:54,551 --> 00:43:57,471 We are gonna help you save for your college education. 960 00:43:57,554 --> 00:44:01,524 Wait, are you trying to poach girls from a Dandelions meeting? 961 00:44:01,767 --> 00:44:03,307 No! 962 00:44:03,393 --> 00:44:06,353 Helen, we are not trying to poach girls. 963 00:44:06,396 --> 00:44:10,476 We are actively and definitely poaching girls from this meeting. 964 00:44:10,567 --> 00:44:11,567 Get your hands off me. 965 00:44:11,652 --> 00:44:13,112 - Fuck you, Helen! - You fuck you! 966 00:44:13,946 --> 00:44:15,406 Tell your little shitty daughter, 967 00:44:15,489 --> 00:44:17,779 never talk to Rachel like that again. 968 00:44:17,866 --> 00:44:19,906 - Let's um, go, girls. - Okay, girls! 969 00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:22,830 Whoever wants to go to the fun room, come on with me! 970 00:44:22,913 --> 00:44:26,583 Just down the hall. The bigger, the better room. We got foosball! 971 00:44:26,959 --> 00:44:28,959 Okay. And I promise, no Helen! 972 00:44:29,461 --> 00:44:31,631 - Bye, Helen! - Good luck with your product! 973 00:44:32,256 --> 00:44:33,416 Oh, man. 974 00:44:33,507 --> 00:44:34,587 I mean, what is it, anyway? 975 00:44:34,633 --> 00:44:39,603 It looks like just a bunch of homemade, gluten-filled, sugar-filled, 976 00:44:39,847 --> 00:44:41,347 diabetes cake. 977 00:44:49,773 --> 00:44:51,113 With chocolate! 978 00:44:51,733 --> 00:44:53,113 Oh, my God. 979 00:44:54,528 --> 00:44:55,858 It's good. 980 00:45:23,307 --> 00:45:24,427 Now, what are we doing? 981 00:45:24,474 --> 00:45:26,644 Selling brownies! 982 00:45:26,727 --> 00:45:28,767 Okay, what do we say if somebody doesn't want to buy? 983 00:45:28,812 --> 00:45:30,402 "Buy my brownies or I'll kill you." 984 00:45:31,023 --> 00:45:32,073 Don't say that, Chrystal. 985 00:45:32,149 --> 00:45:33,189 Say that. That's perfect. 986 00:45:33,317 --> 00:45:35,237 All right, now go make some money! 987 00:45:35,986 --> 00:45:37,196 Woo! 988 00:45:37,321 --> 00:45:39,031 The van leaves at 7:00! 989 00:45:39,114 --> 00:45:41,324 If you're not back, we will leave without you! 990 00:45:41,366 --> 00:45:43,736 No, we're not gonna leave. Nobody's leaving you. 991 00:45:43,827 --> 00:45:45,617 We're leaving at 7:00 sharp. 992 00:45:45,829 --> 00:45:47,829 - 7:00! - The van'll be here. 993 00:45:48,415 --> 00:45:50,245 I didn't count how many there were. 994 00:45:51,335 --> 00:45:52,635 - I did. Whew. - Oh, good. 995 00:46:01,845 --> 00:46:04,135 Okay, these are cut and cooled. Bag 'em. 996 00:46:04,681 --> 00:46:06,101 Michelle, are you helping? 997 00:46:06,183 --> 00:46:07,563 Yes, of course, I'm helping. 998 00:46:13,649 --> 00:46:15,359 By the way, don't give him anymore freebies, okay? 999 00:46:15,442 --> 00:46:17,692 He's gotta pay for them, just like everybody else. 1000 00:46:17,986 --> 00:46:19,106 Oh, they're so good! 1001 00:46:19,196 --> 00:46:21,696 There you are. All set. 1002 00:46:23,033 --> 00:46:24,083 Don't forget the tip. 1003 00:46:24,201 --> 00:46:25,291 Now, how could I? You're so big. 1004 00:46:25,369 --> 00:46:27,539 You've said it so many times. And, there, you got it. 1005 00:46:32,626 --> 00:46:33,956 Hi, do you have money? 1006 00:46:35,671 --> 00:46:36,711 Hey! 1007 00:46:37,047 --> 00:46:39,127 There ain't gonna be any brownies left in the world. 1008 00:46:39,216 --> 00:46:41,086 Get outta here. Go sell brownies! 1009 00:46:42,636 --> 00:46:44,546 - Okay. - Hello, Bonnie! 1010 00:46:44,596 --> 00:46:48,216 Look at this. Patrice, take that. 1011 00:46:48,267 --> 00:46:49,727 Take that and buy me something! 1012 00:46:49,768 --> 00:46:51,478 I'm just kidding, but if you want to... 1013 00:46:57,568 --> 00:47:01,318 Remember, girls, when the houses are nice, we double the price. 1014 00:47:01,405 --> 00:47:03,915 Rich people don't trust affordable snacks. 1015 00:47:03,991 --> 00:47:06,581 - You know what? Let's go up to $10 a box. - Hey! 1016 00:47:08,537 --> 00:47:09,827 What do you think you're doing? 1017 00:47:09,913 --> 00:47:11,413 Hi, Helen! 1018 00:47:11,748 --> 00:47:14,418 We're participating in the American Dream. 1019 00:47:14,501 --> 00:47:16,001 Not on this street, you're not. 1020 00:47:16,086 --> 00:47:17,916 This is Dandelion territory. 1021 00:47:18,005 --> 00:47:19,175 It's okay, Helen, we'll just... 1022 00:47:19,256 --> 00:47:20,756 - Shut up, Sandy! - Okay. 1023 00:47:20,841 --> 00:47:21,931 You guys are losers! 1024 00:47:21,967 --> 00:47:24,177 Hey, suck my dick, Gigantor! 1025 00:47:24,261 --> 00:47:25,261 You're fucking dead! 1026 00:47:25,345 --> 00:47:26,385 Hannah, stop it! 1027 00:47:26,638 --> 00:47:28,558 We are not gonna behave like this! 1028 00:47:28,599 --> 00:47:29,769 Michelle. 1029 00:47:30,142 --> 00:47:31,232 A word? 1030 00:47:31,268 --> 00:47:32,438 I'd be delighted. 1031 00:47:32,603 --> 00:47:36,613 First rule of business, pretend to negotiate and then take what you want. 1032 00:47:41,445 --> 00:47:43,115 Listen, jailbird. 1033 00:47:43,363 --> 00:47:45,123 You think because you used to be someone 1034 00:47:45,199 --> 00:47:46,569 that the rules don't apply to you 1035 00:47:46,658 --> 00:47:48,868 and your pathetic band of rejects? 1036 00:47:49,953 --> 00:47:51,123 Well, you're wrong, bitch. 1037 00:47:51,246 --> 00:47:52,866 Ugh. Helen! 1038 00:47:53,540 --> 00:47:56,290 You got a case of the old trench-mouth. 1039 00:47:56,376 --> 00:47:59,296 Did you let a corpse curl up and die in there? 1040 00:47:59,505 --> 00:48:00,635 Forget it, Michelle. 1041 00:48:00,964 --> 00:48:03,554 - Let's just start on the next block. - No, no, no. 1042 00:48:03,967 --> 00:48:08,637 Second rule of business is when a stanky, hummus-eating bitch 1043 00:48:08,722 --> 00:48:12,312 and her yeti of a daughter gets in your face, 1044 00:48:12,643 --> 00:48:13,983 you gotta regulate. 1045 00:48:15,687 --> 00:48:17,647 Hannah, give me some space. 1046 00:48:22,986 --> 00:48:23,986 Oh. 1047 00:48:24,071 --> 00:48:25,821 - How'd that taste? - Nice. 1048 00:48:30,369 --> 00:48:31,659 Chomp on that! 1049 00:48:37,501 --> 00:48:39,251 Let's get 'em! 1050 00:48:57,020 --> 00:48:59,940 They're animals! They're animals! 1051 00:49:09,241 --> 00:49:10,701 Rachel's not done! 1052 00:49:11,034 --> 00:49:12,994 Rachel's thirsty for more! 1053 00:49:19,918 --> 00:49:21,038 Yeah! 1054 00:49:22,212 --> 00:49:24,342 Hey, Chrystal! I'm coming for you! 1055 00:49:24,798 --> 00:49:26,048 Bring it on! 1056 00:49:35,559 --> 00:49:37,729 Oh, no, you don't! You're not going anywhere! 1057 00:49:37,811 --> 00:49:40,021 Do you understand me? Dandelions never leave a street fight! 1058 00:49:40,063 --> 00:49:41,403 God damn it, Helen! 1059 00:49:41,440 --> 00:49:42,690 We're gonna wipe the floor! 1060 00:49:45,736 --> 00:49:47,236 Sandy, why? 1061 00:49:47,321 --> 00:49:49,241 'Cause I'm the leader, dang it! 1062 00:49:49,364 --> 00:49:50,784 - You're a traitor! - No. 1063 00:49:51,575 --> 00:49:54,335 Move! That bitch is mine! 1064 00:49:54,411 --> 00:49:55,541 Wait. No! 1065 00:49:55,579 --> 00:49:58,999 Hey, time to put the cookies back in the cookie jar, Helen! 1066 00:49:59,082 --> 00:50:01,382 - Ooh. - I warned you, Helen! I warned you! 1067 00:50:01,585 --> 00:50:03,255 Those clusters are scratching me! 1068 00:50:03,337 --> 00:50:05,417 Good! Darlings! 1069 00:50:05,964 --> 00:50:07,094 Let's go! 1070 00:50:08,342 --> 00:50:09,592 Stay down! 1071 00:50:09,676 --> 00:50:11,296 - Don't tell your mom. - Okay. 1072 00:50:11,428 --> 00:50:13,428 This was great. 1073 00:50:20,312 --> 00:50:21,312 Ooh! 1074 00:50:21,438 --> 00:50:23,058 That batch is burnt! 1075 00:50:25,234 --> 00:50:26,324 Bye. 1076 00:50:28,946 --> 00:50:30,316 One of 'em's in me. 1077 00:50:33,283 --> 00:50:35,623 Hi, is there a Claire here? 1078 00:50:35,786 --> 00:50:37,036 Is Claire... 1079 00:50:39,456 --> 00:50:41,116 Hi! Where is Claire? 1080 00:50:41,208 --> 00:50:43,668 Section 509, but return on investment... 1081 00:50:43,752 --> 00:50:44,752 Ugh, ugh. 1082 00:50:45,254 --> 00:50:46,464 Oh. 1083 00:50:46,630 --> 00:50:48,670 - Look at you, in the middle of everything... - I'll call you back. 1084 00:50:48,757 --> 00:50:49,797 In a bullpen. 1085 00:50:49,842 --> 00:50:50,972 What are you doing here? 1086 00:50:51,510 --> 00:50:53,800 We're out of brownies. We need you to make more. 1087 00:50:54,137 --> 00:50:55,507 Well, I'm at work! 1088 00:50:55,973 --> 00:50:58,563 Uh, hi, there! Hey! You're Michelle Darnell. 1089 00:50:58,976 --> 00:51:00,516 - Of course I am. - Yes, you are. 1090 00:51:00,602 --> 00:51:02,522 Mike, this is Michelle. Michelle, Mike. 1091 00:51:03,981 --> 00:51:04,981 Ah... 1092 00:51:05,482 --> 00:51:06,822 "Mike" Mike. 1093 00:51:08,068 --> 00:51:09,188 Oh. Rejected Mike. 1094 00:51:09,278 --> 00:51:10,988 - The rejected Mike? - Don't... 1095 00:51:11,071 --> 00:51:14,161 You know, he is kind of cute. I think you should toss him a pity date. 1096 00:51:14,199 --> 00:51:15,529 I don't need the pity, 1097 00:51:15,617 --> 00:51:17,737 but I will take the date if that's out there. 1098 00:51:17,828 --> 00:51:18,948 If that's an option. 1099 00:51:18,996 --> 00:51:21,366 Pity's all you've got. Pity's your best friend. 1100 00:51:21,665 --> 00:51:23,335 - Okay. Good to know. - Okay. 1101 00:51:23,417 --> 00:51:25,207 Just stop talking to him, okay? Leave him alone. 1102 00:51:25,294 --> 00:51:26,844 What is going on here? 1103 00:51:27,171 --> 00:51:29,381 Oh, my... Greatest. Okay. 1104 00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:31,590 You are Michelle Darnell. 1105 00:51:31,675 --> 00:51:32,875 Guilty as charged. 1106 00:51:33,010 --> 00:51:36,010 Oh, wow. I have two personal heroes in my life, 1107 00:51:36,054 --> 00:51:38,184 and I am staring at one of them right now. 1108 00:51:38,390 --> 00:51:40,770 - Oh, no. No touching. - No. 1109 00:51:41,018 --> 00:51:43,058 Curious to know who the other one is. 1110 00:51:43,145 --> 00:51:45,485 It's Benedict Cumberbatch, and you. 1111 00:51:46,023 --> 00:51:49,403 Huh. I did not peg you for a "Cumbersnatch." 1112 00:51:49,693 --> 00:51:51,403 That's me. Cumbersnatch. 1113 00:51:51,486 --> 00:51:52,856 You seem like a real Cumbersnatch. 1114 00:51:52,905 --> 00:51:54,705 Well, thank you so, so much. 1115 00:51:54,781 --> 00:51:55,871 You're welcome. Oh... 1116 00:51:56,491 --> 00:51:58,031 Thank you. Great encounter. 1117 00:51:58,118 --> 00:52:01,538 It's always fun. And I think I'm done with you. 1118 00:52:01,788 --> 00:52:05,418 Absolutely. And, madam, it was an honor. 1119 00:52:05,501 --> 00:52:07,591 - Off you go! - And here I am, okay. 1120 00:52:09,713 --> 00:52:10,713 Strange girl. 1121 00:52:12,257 --> 00:52:13,377 Okay. 1122 00:52:14,176 --> 00:52:18,006 Claire, if this company is going to work, I need you full time. 1123 00:52:18,055 --> 00:52:19,605 I can't have you here. 1124 00:52:20,265 --> 00:52:21,975 Are you in or are you out? 1125 00:52:22,059 --> 00:52:23,979 I can't just leave my job! 1126 00:52:24,061 --> 00:52:26,101 I mean, I have to have a steady income. 1127 00:52:26,188 --> 00:52:27,558 I have Rachel to think about. 1128 00:52:27,648 --> 00:52:30,068 No, no, no. This is for Rachel. Okay? 1129 00:52:30,108 --> 00:52:32,738 If this works out the way I know it's going to work out, 1130 00:52:32,778 --> 00:52:34,398 it's gonna set you two up for life. 1131 00:52:34,905 --> 00:52:36,075 We're already making enough money 1132 00:52:36,156 --> 00:52:37,816 to pay your rent and all your bills, 1133 00:52:37,908 --> 00:52:41,538 and I'm just about to put a very big fish on the hook as our investor. 1134 00:52:41,620 --> 00:52:42,790 This is what I do. 1135 00:52:42,871 --> 00:52:44,411 Okay? You know that. 1136 00:52:45,165 --> 00:52:46,785 You have to trust me. 1137 00:52:48,168 --> 00:52:49,838 I do hate this job. 1138 00:52:50,462 --> 00:52:52,302 I mean, it's a terrible job. 1139 00:52:53,090 --> 00:52:55,090 My God. I mean, look at him. 1140 00:52:55,551 --> 00:52:58,091 He's slumped over, asleep. I hope he's asleep. 1141 00:52:58,136 --> 00:52:59,846 You don't want to be that guy. 1142 00:53:00,597 --> 00:53:01,807 What do you say? 1143 00:53:03,517 --> 00:53:04,597 Okay. 1144 00:53:04,685 --> 00:53:06,565 Yes. I'm all in. 1145 00:53:06,603 --> 00:53:08,193 Dana, I quit. 1146 00:53:08,397 --> 00:53:10,437 I'm gonna start my own business, okay? 1147 00:53:10,482 --> 00:53:12,652 - I have my own business. - Yes, she does. 1148 00:53:12,734 --> 00:53:14,614 Guys, it was lovely here. 1149 00:53:14,653 --> 00:53:17,163 Not really, but I hope you all have a wonderful day. 1150 00:53:17,239 --> 00:53:19,449 Mike, would you still like to go on that date? 1151 00:53:19,533 --> 00:53:20,623 Uh, yes, I would. 1152 00:53:20,701 --> 00:53:23,121 I'm free tomorrow at 7:30. Bring your A-game. 1153 00:53:23,829 --> 00:53:26,459 Tracy? Wake up! I'm out! 1154 00:53:26,498 --> 00:53:28,208 Wake it up, Tracy! 1155 00:53:28,292 --> 00:53:29,292 - No. - No. 1156 00:53:29,376 --> 00:53:30,586 - No, thank you. - I'm so... 1157 00:53:30,794 --> 00:53:32,924 - Ooh. No. - I'm very flattered. 1158 00:53:34,631 --> 00:53:37,761 Seems like a good night for sexual activity, Claire. 1159 00:53:39,052 --> 00:53:42,102 How long has it been since you've had sexual activity? 1160 00:53:43,098 --> 00:53:46,978 Stop yelling "sexual activity." 'Cause Rachel might hear you. 1161 00:53:48,645 --> 00:53:52,015 You know, you're the one that's yelling "sexual activity" out in the hallway. 1162 00:53:52,316 --> 00:53:54,066 Just answer the question, Claire. 1163 00:53:54,151 --> 00:53:55,321 I don't know. 1164 00:53:55,402 --> 00:53:57,152 If I had to guess, 1165 00:53:57,487 --> 00:54:00,407 maybe four, five, six years? 1166 00:54:01,116 --> 00:54:03,656 What? Oh, my God. Did you take a vow? 1167 00:54:03,744 --> 00:54:06,004 It's very hard to find a good sitter. 1168 00:54:06,496 --> 00:54:08,576 Okay. We'll go with that. I just... 1169 00:54:08,665 --> 00:54:10,495 I'm gonna say, it probably doesn't help 1170 00:54:10,542 --> 00:54:13,252 that you're dressed like you grocery-shop at a CVS. 1171 00:54:13,921 --> 00:54:14,961 What? 1172 00:54:15,005 --> 00:54:16,335 I love this sweater. 1173 00:54:16,673 --> 00:54:18,053 I don't know why you would. 1174 00:54:18,133 --> 00:54:20,183 This sweater goes with everything. It's a neutral. 1175 00:54:20,302 --> 00:54:23,682 It doesn't go with you or your skin, or your face. 1176 00:54:23,931 --> 00:54:26,601 That sweater is the equivalent of a sandwich board 1177 00:54:26,683 --> 00:54:28,443 that just says, "I give up." 1178 00:54:28,519 --> 00:54:31,099 And then in the back, it says, "I never started tryin'." 1179 00:54:31,897 --> 00:54:33,517 It somewhat looks like you have 1180 00:54:33,607 --> 00:54:38,397 sewn together two very long, sad tube socks and then filled each end 1181 00:54:38,779 --> 00:54:41,739 with wet sand and rocks. 1182 00:54:41,823 --> 00:54:43,243 What are you talking about? 1183 00:54:43,325 --> 00:54:44,955 It just looks like two basset hounds 1184 00:54:45,077 --> 00:54:46,697 may have cried themselves to death 1185 00:54:46,787 --> 00:54:48,247 in your sweater. 1186 00:54:48,330 --> 00:54:50,710 I like it. I think this looks great. 1187 00:54:51,375 --> 00:54:52,505 Can I... 1188 00:54:52,543 --> 00:54:53,883 - Michelle! - Well... 1189 00:54:53,961 --> 00:54:55,091 - You are... - I had to check. 1190 00:54:55,170 --> 00:54:56,380 I didn't know what was in there. 1191 00:54:56,463 --> 00:54:58,593 You're making me feel very insecure right before my date. 1192 00:54:58,674 --> 00:54:59,764 Don't! 1193 00:54:59,842 --> 00:55:02,092 If your breasts could speak right now, 1194 00:55:02,177 --> 00:55:04,387 I think they'd be saying, "Claire, 1195 00:55:04,555 --> 00:55:06,725 "please don't zip me up in your jeans." 1196 00:55:06,807 --> 00:55:08,097 - That is... - You're gonna zip a nipple. 1197 00:55:08,183 --> 00:55:09,393 That's not what they'd say. 1198 00:55:09,476 --> 00:55:11,436 May I adjust your strap? 1199 00:55:11,520 --> 00:55:13,480 'Cause I'm trying to help you, Claire. 1200 00:55:13,564 --> 00:55:15,444 You say, "Be more helpful." And I'm trying to be helpful. 1201 00:55:15,566 --> 00:55:16,646 You can tighten the strap. 1202 00:55:16,733 --> 00:55:18,443 Okay. What... 1203 00:55:18,527 --> 00:55:20,197 Just a little, 'cause I want it... 1204 00:55:20,237 --> 00:55:21,447 What is that toggle? 1205 00:55:22,406 --> 00:55:23,696 Oh, it's a nursing bra. 1206 00:55:24,366 --> 00:55:26,576 Oh, my God. Are you still nursing Rachel? 1207 00:55:26,618 --> 00:55:30,038 No, it's from when she was a baby. But it's very comfortable. 1208 00:55:30,247 --> 00:55:32,247 That's not comfortable to see. 1209 00:55:32,332 --> 00:55:33,752 Now, let me see this. 1210 00:55:33,792 --> 00:55:34,922 It's very often a fit issue. 1211 00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:38,170 Why do these have so much pull? 1212 00:55:38,297 --> 00:55:39,547 All right, well... 1213 00:55:39,590 --> 00:55:42,340 Claire! It's like Geppetto! 1214 00:55:42,426 --> 00:55:44,676 Look at that. Look at this. It's like, "Horses, horses." 1215 00:55:44,761 --> 00:55:45,891 - It's like I'm... - Oh, my God. 1216 00:55:45,929 --> 00:55:47,509 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay! 1217 00:55:47,598 --> 00:55:49,218 It feels good. I need to be comfortable. 1218 00:55:49,266 --> 00:55:51,226 It doesn't feel good to my eyes. 1219 00:55:51,268 --> 00:55:52,938 Can I just put 'em where they're supposed to be? 1220 00:55:52,978 --> 00:55:55,228 And I want you to be able to see the difference. 1221 00:55:55,272 --> 00:55:58,532 You got "Happy girl", and then, uh-oh. 1222 00:55:58,817 --> 00:55:59,937 They just drop out. 1223 00:56:00,527 --> 00:56:02,777 And I should not be able to separate... 1224 00:56:02,821 --> 00:56:03,951 - Okay. All right. - They're heavier, but... 1225 00:56:03,989 --> 00:56:05,989 So how do you like it when I just get in there and bang around? 1226 00:56:06,116 --> 00:56:07,616 - I love it. - Why is there not... 1227 00:56:07,910 --> 00:56:08,990 Oh, there's no give. 1228 00:56:09,077 --> 00:56:11,287 Look at that. I can't even feel that. 1229 00:56:11,371 --> 00:56:12,411 That's when you know... 1230 00:56:15,125 --> 00:56:17,335 I don't feel it, okay? 100% silicone. 1231 00:56:17,419 --> 00:56:20,299 And not the kind that's supposed to ever be inside the body. 1232 00:56:20,380 --> 00:56:22,010 I know. They're fantastic. 1233 00:56:22,090 --> 00:56:23,130 That's something else. 1234 00:56:23,217 --> 00:56:24,297 Might feel that. 1235 00:56:24,343 --> 00:56:25,513 That's my nipple. 1236 00:56:26,220 --> 00:56:28,300 - Yeah, they're up here, where they should be. - Oh, my God. 1237 00:56:28,388 --> 00:56:29,888 No, see, you need to bring 'em down. 1238 00:56:29,973 --> 00:56:31,603 No! They can't, anyway, no. 1239 00:56:31,642 --> 00:56:33,772 That's what you need to do. They're too high, Michelle. 1240 00:56:33,810 --> 00:56:35,150 - There's a structure. Stop. - No. 1241 00:56:35,187 --> 00:56:36,307 If we were... You need to... 1242 00:56:36,355 --> 00:56:38,235 - Look, just take 'em a little bit lower. - Oh, my God. 1243 00:56:38,315 --> 00:56:39,485 - How about that? - I paid a fortune for these. 1244 00:56:39,566 --> 00:56:40,776 - No, I'm gonna bring 'em... - I'm keepin' 'em up! 1245 00:56:40,817 --> 00:56:41,817 Just gonna push 'em right down. 1246 00:56:41,902 --> 00:56:42,902 I'm trying to help you not... 1247 00:56:42,986 --> 00:56:44,566 What're you guys doing? 1248 00:56:44,738 --> 00:56:46,028 Hey, there! 1249 00:56:46,114 --> 00:56:49,374 We're just... There was a... Probably a... 1250 00:56:49,451 --> 00:56:50,491 - I was... - Bugs. 1251 00:56:50,577 --> 00:56:54,617 We were jostling each other's bosoms like... 1252 00:56:54,915 --> 00:56:56,005 Gals do. 1253 00:56:56,083 --> 00:56:57,583 No, we weren't. 1254 00:56:57,668 --> 00:57:00,708 I was just trying to help your mom here get ready for her big date. 1255 00:57:00,796 --> 00:57:03,296 - I'm a little nervous. - She's a little bit nervous. 1256 00:57:03,340 --> 00:57:06,180 Always gotta stretch your boobs when you're nervous. 1257 00:57:07,427 --> 00:57:08,467 You should change. 1258 00:57:08,846 --> 00:57:10,966 That's your TV-watching sweater. 1259 00:57:11,598 --> 00:57:12,808 Thank you. 1260 00:57:13,475 --> 00:57:15,595 Okay. Thank you for that. 1261 00:57:15,686 --> 00:57:17,396 Okay, well, we're gonna leave you to it. 1262 00:57:17,479 --> 00:57:18,859 You can treat yourself to a little underwire 1263 00:57:18,939 --> 00:57:21,019 and something that doesn't look like you sell ceramics. 1264 00:57:21,108 --> 00:57:23,068 Let's go watch a movie. I'm babysitting. 1265 00:57:23,151 --> 00:57:25,201 - Have you seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre? - No. 1266 00:57:25,320 --> 00:57:27,030 I'm kidding! I'm not kidding. 1267 00:57:39,835 --> 00:57:41,045 Hi. 1268 00:57:41,211 --> 00:57:44,421 Hi. Oh, my God. You look gorgeous. 1269 00:57:44,506 --> 00:57:46,676 I'm wearing a bra, a new bra. It's not new. 1270 00:57:46,717 --> 00:57:48,637 It's old. I just haven't worn it in a while. 1271 00:57:48,719 --> 00:57:51,719 Hey, you know what, I went with an old bra tonight, too, so... 1272 00:57:52,681 --> 00:57:53,771 Let's get a table. 1273 00:57:53,891 --> 00:57:55,021 Absolutely. 1274 00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:59,850 I wanted to tell you earlier actually, on a serious note. 1275 00:58:00,522 --> 00:58:02,902 When you walked out the other day from work, 1276 00:58:02,941 --> 00:58:04,781 quite dramatically, I might add, 1277 00:58:04,860 --> 00:58:06,240 six other people quit. 1278 00:58:06,653 --> 00:58:08,493 - What? - Mmm-hmm. They just walked out. 1279 00:58:08,572 --> 00:58:10,282 - Oh, my God. - I know, right? 1280 00:58:10,407 --> 00:58:11,567 I started a chain reaction. 1281 00:58:11,658 --> 00:58:12,948 You started a huge chain reaction. 1282 00:58:13,035 --> 00:58:14,245 Six people walked out 1283 00:58:14,328 --> 00:58:15,908 and then immediately three people walked back inside. 1284 00:58:15,954 --> 00:58:17,254 I think they were outside smoking. 1285 00:58:17,539 --> 00:58:19,119 But it was like you were a cult leader. 1286 00:58:19,249 --> 00:58:20,829 It was like a tremendous show of support. 1287 00:58:20,918 --> 00:58:23,418 It was, like, very inspiring. 1288 00:58:23,837 --> 00:58:25,837 - Really? - Yeah, really. 1289 00:58:26,256 --> 00:58:27,666 Do you find that hard to believe? 1290 00:58:27,758 --> 00:58:30,468 - That I'm tremendously inspiring? - Yeah. 1291 00:58:30,552 --> 00:58:32,012 - Yeah, a bit. - Really? 1292 00:58:32,095 --> 00:58:33,675 Well, let me tell you something, lady. 1293 00:58:33,764 --> 00:58:36,104 You are more than a little inspiring. 1294 00:58:38,644 --> 00:58:40,854 I have been talking ad nauseam here. 1295 00:58:40,979 --> 00:58:43,189 Can you, uh, grab the mic for a sec? 1296 00:58:44,191 --> 00:58:46,111 Well, I, um... 1297 00:58:46,151 --> 00:58:48,781 I got knocked up in grad school by my TA. 1298 00:58:48,862 --> 00:58:50,072 When he found out I was pregnant, 1299 00:58:50,155 --> 00:58:51,905 he pretended like we didn't know each other. 1300 00:58:51,949 --> 00:58:53,779 - What? - Then gave me a "D." 1301 00:58:53,825 --> 00:58:55,235 - What? - Yeah, nice surprise. 1302 00:58:55,285 --> 00:58:56,325 Yeah. 1303 00:58:56,411 --> 00:58:58,201 But I got a great kid out of it. 1304 00:58:58,539 --> 00:58:59,709 I bet you're a great mom. 1305 00:58:59,831 --> 00:59:01,001 I try. 1306 00:59:01,083 --> 00:59:03,753 I mean, unless she is currently unsupervised. Then you're a horrible mom. 1307 00:59:03,794 --> 00:59:05,554 No, she's with Michelle. 1308 00:59:05,629 --> 00:59:07,209 - She's with Michelle? - Yes. 1309 00:59:07,297 --> 00:59:08,917 She's your felon babysitter. 1310 00:59:09,842 --> 00:59:12,142 Oh! Oh, my God! 1311 00:59:12,219 --> 00:59:14,299 Rachel, it's the goriest part! 1312 00:59:14,388 --> 00:59:16,638 It's the goriest part. You're missing it! 1313 00:59:16,682 --> 00:59:19,982 Oh, my God. He's killing her with a chainsaw. 1314 00:59:20,060 --> 00:59:21,190 Oh. 1315 00:59:21,645 --> 00:59:23,775 I have a felon watching my child. 1316 00:59:23,814 --> 00:59:24,984 That just occurred to you, didn't it? 1317 00:59:25,065 --> 00:59:26,315 - Yes, it did. - Yeah. 1318 00:59:26,400 --> 00:59:28,280 - It's good thing I'm here. - Let's have some more wine. 1319 00:59:28,652 --> 00:59:30,862 Absolutely, yeah. Hey, excuse me. 1320 00:59:31,154 --> 00:59:33,994 Hi. Do you think maybe we could get two more glasses of the... 1321 00:59:34,783 --> 00:59:36,333 No. Hold on. 1322 00:59:37,119 --> 00:59:39,079 Bring us a bottle of whatever the lady would like 1323 00:59:39,162 --> 00:59:41,922 in the twenty-five to twenty-eight dollar range. 1324 00:59:42,749 --> 00:59:45,249 Sure, I'll send somebody to Walgreens to get you something nice. 1325 00:59:45,335 --> 00:59:47,745 Cool. You guys do that? What's with that? 1326 00:59:47,838 --> 00:59:49,128 Oh, my God! 1327 00:59:50,007 --> 00:59:52,007 Is that like a really cheap bottle of wine? 1328 00:59:55,137 --> 00:59:57,967 You got a lot of balls showing up here, Darnell. 1329 00:59:58,682 --> 01:00:01,892 Listen, Ida, I know you're still mad at me, and I don't blame you. 1330 01:00:02,019 --> 01:00:04,019 I shouldn't have cut you out of that Emerson deal. 1331 01:00:04,062 --> 01:00:05,942 But if it makes it any better, 1332 01:00:06,023 --> 01:00:08,273 I made a blinding amount of money on that deal. 1333 01:00:10,485 --> 01:00:14,235 You know the first time I saw you? Twenty-three years old. 1334 01:00:14,323 --> 01:00:16,323 Yeah. I knew right away, 1335 01:00:16,658 --> 01:00:18,578 you were a tough, money-hungry, 1336 01:00:18,660 --> 01:00:21,710 self-serving, see-you-next-Tuesday gal 1337 01:00:21,747 --> 01:00:23,117 just like me. 1338 01:00:23,207 --> 01:00:27,377 And that's why I decided to mentor you. Just let you get too close. 1339 01:00:28,128 --> 01:00:30,508 I started to think of you as family. 1340 01:00:32,216 --> 01:00:34,546 Well, families are for suckers, right? 1341 01:00:35,260 --> 01:00:36,550 That's for sure. 1342 01:00:37,638 --> 01:00:39,468 What do you want, Michelle? 1343 01:00:39,556 --> 01:00:41,136 I need an investor. 1344 01:00:41,725 --> 01:00:43,515 Oh, for your little brownie venture? 1345 01:00:44,228 --> 01:00:46,098 How do you even know about that? 1346 01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:49,730 Because I'm Ida Marquette. I know everything. 1347 01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:51,400 Here. 1348 01:00:52,486 --> 01:00:53,736 Come on, Ida. 1349 01:00:53,820 --> 01:00:56,030 I'm sure you got quite an overhead on this glue factory here. 1350 01:00:56,073 --> 01:00:58,243 - Do you want in or not? - You know, 1351 01:00:59,993 --> 01:01:02,163 I once made love on a pool table 1352 01:01:02,246 --> 01:01:04,246 in Hot Coffee, Mississippi 1353 01:01:04,373 --> 01:01:07,253 with six members of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. 1354 01:01:08,544 --> 01:01:09,754 Are you stroking out? 1355 01:01:09,795 --> 01:01:13,135 What does this have to do with what we're talking about right now? 1356 01:01:13,298 --> 01:01:16,508 The point is, Darnell, I have very few regrets in my life. 1357 01:01:17,344 --> 01:01:20,394 But you... You were my best protégée. 1358 01:01:21,473 --> 01:01:22,473 Tell you what. 1359 01:01:22,558 --> 01:01:26,688 I'll back you, if this checks out. Just for old times' sake. 1360 01:01:26,937 --> 01:01:27,977 Okay. 1361 01:01:28,063 --> 01:01:29,613 If you'll excuse me, Shawshank, 1362 01:01:29,982 --> 01:01:31,982 I'm late for my morning ride. 1363 01:01:32,067 --> 01:01:33,227 Yes! 1364 01:01:34,278 --> 01:01:35,358 Okay. 1365 01:01:35,445 --> 01:01:37,105 You better make me a shitload of money. 1366 01:01:37,197 --> 01:01:38,657 Away, Butters! 1367 01:01:44,538 --> 01:01:46,248 Come on! Eat up, ladies. 1368 01:01:46,290 --> 01:01:47,670 This is a celebratory dinner. 1369 01:01:47,749 --> 01:01:49,379 We got our investor. 1370 01:01:49,459 --> 01:01:51,209 Okay. Here we go. 1371 01:01:53,338 --> 01:01:54,628 Hoo-hoo-hoo. 1372 01:01:54,756 --> 01:01:55,836 Look at this! 1373 01:01:56,216 --> 01:01:57,296 What is this? 1374 01:01:57,384 --> 01:02:00,474 Well, I feel it's time you become more adventurous. 1375 01:02:05,225 --> 01:02:06,975 Thank God! Pizza! 1376 01:02:07,227 --> 01:02:08,977 I know you don't like sushi. 1377 01:02:09,062 --> 01:02:10,942 Thank you, Michelle! I'm starving. 1378 01:02:11,356 --> 01:02:13,356 And fugu for the lady. 1379 01:02:13,734 --> 01:02:15,744 - Thank you, Ping. - Fugu? 1380 01:02:17,988 --> 01:02:20,528 The infamous pufferfish. 1381 01:02:20,616 --> 01:02:24,696 When prepared incorrectly, it can lead to paralysis or even death. 1382 01:02:24,786 --> 01:02:29,036 But when it is prepared correctly, it is like a volcano erupting in my mouth. 1383 01:02:29,124 --> 01:02:30,714 Let's hope for the second. 1384 01:02:35,672 --> 01:02:37,972 Oh, this is nice. Get in here, guys. 1385 01:02:38,008 --> 01:02:39,378 I don't wanna hog it all. 1386 01:02:39,927 --> 01:02:42,257 Michelle, are you all right? 1387 01:02:42,429 --> 01:02:47,599 When it's this perfect, it takes you to the brink of paralysis. 1388 01:02:47,684 --> 01:02:50,524 And then, at the last minute, it just lets you go. 1389 01:02:51,188 --> 01:02:53,148 Three, two... 1390 01:02:53,857 --> 01:02:54,977 Uh-oh. 1391 01:02:57,945 --> 01:02:59,245 Michelle? 1392 01:03:06,662 --> 01:03:09,332 - Whoo. - That's a very risky dish. 1393 01:03:09,373 --> 01:03:11,253 Oh, God. How long was I out? 1394 01:03:11,333 --> 01:03:12,923 Are you serious? Like 10 seconds. 1395 01:03:13,377 --> 01:03:14,417 Yeah. 1396 01:03:14,837 --> 01:03:16,297 It's a personal best. 1397 01:03:16,713 --> 01:03:18,053 I was thinking about having more. 1398 01:03:18,131 --> 01:03:20,181 All right, I think everybody's done with the fugu. 1399 01:03:20,217 --> 01:03:22,337 - I'm gonna tea it out, just for a second. - Yeah. 1400 01:03:22,386 --> 01:03:23,756 I made you something. 1401 01:03:23,846 --> 01:03:24,886 What? 1402 01:03:24,972 --> 01:03:27,392 I mean, I thought I should give it to you now 1403 01:03:27,432 --> 01:03:31,232 'cause you keep eating things that almost kill you. 1404 01:03:33,105 --> 01:03:34,735 I made the frame at school. 1405 01:03:40,237 --> 01:03:43,567 It's a nice frame, Rachel. You did a good job. 1406 01:03:43,907 --> 01:03:45,027 Thanks. 1407 01:03:45,075 --> 01:03:48,945 When I look at the picture, I just think we're like a weird family. 1408 01:03:52,708 --> 01:03:53,748 Okay. Ah. 1409 01:03:54,710 --> 01:03:58,090 Family? That's a little heavy-handed. 1410 01:03:59,131 --> 01:04:01,881 I think, you know, I'm not much into labeling. 1411 01:04:02,467 --> 01:04:04,587 You say "family," and we don't look alike. 1412 01:04:04,678 --> 01:04:08,308 I mean, I'm not even sure that you two look alike. 1413 01:04:08,390 --> 01:04:11,310 We'll have to do a blood test on you for that. 1414 01:04:11,435 --> 01:04:15,735 You know, it's funny, looking at this, I think what day is this? 1415 01:04:15,772 --> 01:04:19,902 'Cause I'm pretty sure I have a... 1416 01:04:20,402 --> 01:04:23,282 I have a previously scheduled thing. 1417 01:04:23,363 --> 01:04:25,283 I don't know what I was... You know. 1418 01:04:25,407 --> 01:04:27,947 Do what you do. I'm gonna do what I do. 1419 01:04:28,076 --> 01:04:29,446 I'll take care of the check. 1420 01:04:30,913 --> 01:04:31,913 I just... 1421 01:04:34,666 --> 01:04:35,916 What was that about? 1422 01:04:37,169 --> 01:04:40,339 I don't know, sweetie. I don't know. 1423 01:04:47,304 --> 01:04:50,274 Hi! Sorry, baby. Michelle was supposed to pick you up. 1424 01:04:50,307 --> 01:04:54,187 I know. I texted her like 500,000 times. 1425 01:05:03,612 --> 01:05:05,032 All of her stuff is gone. 1426 01:05:11,161 --> 01:05:14,831 "Thank you for letting me stay in your home. Sincerely, MD. 1427 01:05:14,915 --> 01:05:17,335 "P.S. I won't miss your couch." 1428 01:05:17,376 --> 01:05:18,746 That's impersonal. 1429 01:05:19,461 --> 01:05:20,671 A bit. 1430 01:05:21,338 --> 01:05:23,548 I shouldn't have given her that picture of us. 1431 01:05:23,632 --> 01:05:25,512 Sweetie, she loved your picture. 1432 01:05:25,551 --> 01:05:30,011 No, come on. She left because it was her time to leave. 1433 01:05:30,097 --> 01:05:32,017 Michelle is a redhead and a Scorpio. 1434 01:05:32,099 --> 01:05:34,429 It's a very impulsive combo. 1435 01:05:37,479 --> 01:05:40,359 These little bites of goodness are puttin' kids in college... 1436 01:05:40,440 --> 01:05:41,440 Yes. 1437 01:05:41,525 --> 01:05:44,155 ...are giving young women in this country a business plan 1438 01:05:44,194 --> 01:05:46,654 and the thought in their head of like, "Yes, I can." 1439 01:05:46,697 --> 01:05:47,857 Is she picking up? 1440 01:05:47,906 --> 01:05:50,076 And if you buy four sets, you get this adorable wagon. 1441 01:05:52,494 --> 01:05:54,754 No. It's her voicemail. 1442 01:06:03,839 --> 01:06:06,759 I got 'em! I got 'em! 1443 01:06:17,519 --> 01:06:18,899 These are going to be huge. 1444 01:06:25,027 --> 01:06:27,237 How does she do it? I want in. 1445 01:06:27,779 --> 01:06:28,949 More milk. 1446 01:06:29,031 --> 01:06:31,741 No, I'm feeling reckless. I want to do it myself this time. 1447 01:06:34,995 --> 01:06:36,045 Ah. 1448 01:06:36,079 --> 01:06:37,329 Good job. 1449 01:06:39,166 --> 01:06:41,996 It's just, a little common courtesy would be nice, you know? 1450 01:06:42,085 --> 01:06:43,585 If she ever returned my calls, 1451 01:06:43,670 --> 01:06:46,260 I would know about these press days in the middle of nowhere. 1452 01:06:46,298 --> 01:06:47,378 Mom, look! 1453 01:06:48,383 --> 01:06:50,143 Congratulations, Claire. 1454 01:06:53,722 --> 01:06:55,772 Honey, why don't you, um, go on inside, 1455 01:06:55,891 --> 01:06:57,931 just look both ways before you cross, okay? 1456 01:06:58,018 --> 01:06:59,018 Okay. 1457 01:07:01,605 --> 01:07:02,985 What're you doing here? 1458 01:07:04,775 --> 01:07:07,655 Looks like you and Michelle have built yourself quite a little empire. 1459 01:07:09,446 --> 01:07:10,446 What do you want? 1460 01:07:10,531 --> 01:07:13,951 I want to take what Michelle Darnell has built. 1461 01:07:14,034 --> 01:07:16,624 I want her to realize that I have taken it away. 1462 01:07:16,703 --> 01:07:20,293 And when she realizes it, when that moment of realization crosses her face, 1463 01:07:20,374 --> 01:07:22,334 and she realizes that I have realized it as well... 1464 01:07:22,417 --> 01:07:23,417 I've lost my train of thought. 1465 01:07:23,460 --> 01:07:24,500 Yeah, I'm not following. 1466 01:07:24,586 --> 01:07:26,166 I want the fucking company, Claire. 1467 01:07:27,548 --> 01:07:29,008 It's only a matter of time 1468 01:07:29,091 --> 01:07:31,221 before Michelle Darnell screws you over. 1469 01:07:31,385 --> 01:07:32,395 So get in there. 1470 01:07:32,469 --> 01:07:34,469 I see you eyein' those brownies. 1471 01:07:34,555 --> 01:07:35,815 Let's have some bites. Go ahead. 1472 01:07:35,889 --> 01:07:36,889 They're not gonna bite you. 1473 01:07:36,974 --> 01:07:38,354 You're gonna bite them. 1474 01:07:38,433 --> 01:07:39,643 Let's get a shot of those. 1475 01:07:54,992 --> 01:07:56,832 Huh, pretty good stuff, right? 1476 01:08:02,666 --> 01:08:04,996 Oh, my God. 1477 01:08:05,085 --> 01:08:06,335 Oh, amazing! 1478 01:08:06,753 --> 01:08:09,513 This is Chrystal. It's one of the Darnell originals. 1479 01:08:09,548 --> 01:08:11,218 She's a giant. Huh? 1480 01:08:11,300 --> 01:08:13,180 I mean, I'm not a doctor, but I have eyes. 1481 01:08:13,218 --> 01:08:15,048 Isn't that fun? Come on with me. 1482 01:08:15,137 --> 01:08:17,007 I got a surprise for all of you guys... 1483 01:08:17,139 --> 01:08:19,019 I think you're gonna be very excited about. 1484 01:08:19,099 --> 01:08:22,189 I'd like to present the new Darnell Darlings' mascot! 1485 01:08:22,269 --> 01:08:23,309 Hit it! 1486 01:08:25,189 --> 01:08:26,859 Take some snaps of this. I know you want to. 1487 01:08:26,940 --> 01:08:28,230 It's a phoenix. 1488 01:08:28,317 --> 01:08:29,317 Michelle. 1489 01:08:29,359 --> 01:08:31,149 You get in there. I know you're not shy. 1490 01:08:31,236 --> 01:08:32,276 What is this? 1491 01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:35,657 It's a phoenix, Claire. It's my totem animal. 1492 01:08:35,699 --> 01:08:39,909 Okay. So you leased a commercial kitchen without telling me? 1493 01:08:39,995 --> 01:08:42,625 Yes. I'm kind of waiting for a, "Thank you, Michelle!" 1494 01:08:42,706 --> 01:08:44,956 Wow, um. I'm having a hard time with the "thank you" 1495 01:08:45,042 --> 01:08:48,712 because you also hired all of these people without consulting me. 1496 01:08:48,795 --> 01:08:52,045 I do know that you've been complaining pretty consistently 1497 01:08:52,132 --> 01:08:54,552 about having to do all the baking and doing it at your house. 1498 01:08:54,635 --> 01:08:55,725 I fixed all that for ya. 1499 01:08:55,761 --> 01:08:56,891 And you're more mad than ever. 1500 01:08:56,970 --> 01:08:58,260 - I don't get it, Claire. - You didn't... 1501 01:08:58,347 --> 01:09:00,887 Michelle, you didn't consult me on any of this, okay? 1502 01:09:00,974 --> 01:09:02,234 I see a bunch of press. 1503 01:09:02,309 --> 01:09:04,769 One of us, not you, got the press here. 1504 01:09:04,853 --> 01:09:05,853 Right. Okay. 1505 01:09:05,896 --> 01:09:07,396 Well, maybe they should know that 1506 01:09:07,523 --> 01:09:09,023 the new and improved Michelle Darnell 1507 01:09:09,066 --> 01:09:12,236 is just as self-centered and egotistical as the old Michelle Darnell. 1508 01:09:12,319 --> 01:09:14,239 - Really? Do you wanna do this? - Sure! 1509 01:09:14,279 --> 01:09:15,529 - 'Cause I would love to do this. - Great. 1510 01:09:15,572 --> 01:09:16,572 You follow me. 1511 01:09:16,657 --> 01:09:18,237 I will follow you, from the front. 1512 01:09:18,283 --> 01:09:20,413 - No, not from the front. From the back! - Yes! 1513 01:09:20,911 --> 01:09:22,751 Don't put your arm in front of me! 1514 01:09:22,788 --> 01:09:24,078 You can't tell me what to do! 1515 01:09:24,122 --> 01:09:25,752 You're not my boss anymore! 1516 01:09:25,832 --> 01:09:27,542 We are partners, 50-50, 1517 01:09:27,584 --> 01:09:29,594 and you can't make decisions without telling me! 1518 01:09:29,795 --> 01:09:31,675 We are not partners, Claire! 1519 01:09:31,755 --> 01:09:33,085 I am a successful businesswoman. 1520 01:09:33,173 --> 01:09:36,473 You are a lonely woman who can make a halfway decent brownie! 1521 01:09:36,552 --> 01:09:38,602 And we all have our little secrets, Claire. Right? 1522 01:09:38,637 --> 01:09:41,427 You double-crossing, hand-holding, sneaky little rat! 1523 01:09:41,473 --> 01:09:42,723 What are you talking about? 1524 01:09:42,766 --> 01:09:44,386 God, I can't believe I helped you! 1525 01:09:44,434 --> 01:09:46,644 I took you in off the street, okay? 1526 01:09:46,728 --> 01:09:47,938 When no one else would. 1527 01:09:48,021 --> 01:09:49,811 You are such a cliché. 1528 01:09:49,898 --> 01:09:52,938 Okay? You're getting close to people so now you have to push them away. 1529 01:09:52,985 --> 01:09:55,205 Okay, don't analyze me, Dr. Phil! 1530 01:09:55,279 --> 01:09:56,989 Why're you guys doing this? 1531 01:09:57,614 --> 01:09:59,284 Rachel, you know what, just go inside, honey. 1532 01:09:59,366 --> 01:10:02,036 No! No! You do not tell my daughter what to do. 1533 01:10:02,119 --> 01:10:03,999 And you know what? Don't ever speak to her again. 1534 01:10:04,079 --> 01:10:05,869 Mom, why would you say that? 1535 01:10:07,958 --> 01:10:12,798 It's fine, Rachel, just... Girls, go inside! Now! 1536 01:10:14,882 --> 01:10:16,592 You know what? I don't need this. 1537 01:10:16,633 --> 01:10:17,933 I don't need that. 1538 01:10:18,468 --> 01:10:19,468 I don't need any of it. 1539 01:10:19,803 --> 01:10:22,183 Let's see how far your brownie recipe takes you. 1540 01:10:23,056 --> 01:10:25,596 I'm cutting you loose and sailin' off! 1541 01:10:25,893 --> 01:10:27,813 I don't need you two weighing me down! 1542 01:10:29,146 --> 01:10:30,306 Rachel! 1543 01:10:30,439 --> 01:10:31,439 Rachel? 1544 01:10:48,332 --> 01:10:51,082 You're the only one that's gonna take care of you. 1545 01:10:51,502 --> 01:10:52,592 The only one. 1546 01:10:54,838 --> 01:10:56,838 Excuse me, you can't just go in there! 1547 01:10:56,882 --> 01:10:58,012 Watch me. 1548 01:10:58,842 --> 01:11:00,222 Hi, Ronald! 1549 01:11:00,552 --> 01:11:03,182 Ooh, I like your new bitches. 1550 01:11:03,222 --> 01:11:05,312 I saw you sniffing around my bakery. 1551 01:11:05,349 --> 01:11:07,519 You looking to get into the brownie business? 1552 01:11:07,559 --> 01:11:10,309 Why? Are you looking to sell your business? 1553 01:11:10,354 --> 01:11:11,354 Why not? 1554 01:11:11,813 --> 01:11:15,153 I have no personal stakes in it. It's just business to me. 1555 01:11:15,192 --> 01:11:17,322 And you've always liked collecting my things. 1556 01:11:25,619 --> 01:11:28,159 Okay. And since this one's coconut macadamia, 1557 01:11:28,205 --> 01:11:30,085 if you have a nut allergy, I don't want you anywhere near... 1558 01:11:30,165 --> 01:11:31,665 When's Michelle coming back? 1559 01:11:31,708 --> 01:11:32,958 I don't know, Chrystal. 1560 01:11:33,043 --> 01:11:34,343 She's like our leader. 1561 01:11:34,378 --> 01:11:36,168 My mom's gonna run this place. 1562 01:11:36,213 --> 01:11:38,593 Yes, I will be running the business 1563 01:11:39,132 --> 01:11:41,892 until Michelle comes back, or... 1564 01:11:41,927 --> 01:11:43,887 Knock, knock. Hi, it's Stephan! 1565 01:11:44,513 --> 01:11:48,893 Hi! I have a message from the new owner of Darnell's Darlings, 1566 01:11:49,017 --> 01:11:50,387 Mr. Renault. 1567 01:11:50,686 --> 01:11:52,056 Uh, sorry, I think there's a mistake. 1568 01:11:52,145 --> 01:11:53,685 I'm one of the owners here. 1569 01:11:54,189 --> 01:11:56,319 This is an eviction notice. 1570 01:11:59,444 --> 01:12:00,654 She sold us out? 1571 01:12:01,530 --> 01:12:02,740 How could she do that? 1572 01:12:02,823 --> 01:12:04,243 Oh, she just did it. 1573 01:12:04,324 --> 01:12:05,874 Okay, let's kick this guy's ass! 1574 01:12:05,909 --> 01:12:07,039 Hey, shit brains! 1575 01:12:07,077 --> 01:12:08,197 Chrystal! 1576 01:12:08,245 --> 01:12:09,705 Protect me. Protect me. 1577 01:12:09,746 --> 01:12:11,996 This is not cowardice. She's very tall! 1578 01:12:15,752 --> 01:12:17,922 Really wish you'd let me kick his ass. 1579 01:12:29,558 --> 01:12:32,808 You know what? It was a good business decision. 1580 01:12:33,854 --> 01:12:36,904 Don't start feelin' bad about good... 1581 01:12:39,610 --> 01:12:41,110 Good decisions. 1582 01:12:42,404 --> 01:12:44,864 Why would Michelle do that to us? 1583 01:12:45,449 --> 01:12:47,159 I just don't get it. 1584 01:12:51,246 --> 01:12:56,166 Well, you know, sweetie, Michelle has got a lot of baggage. 1585 01:12:58,378 --> 01:13:00,008 She's an asshole. 1586 01:13:00,797 --> 01:13:02,217 Language. 1587 01:13:02,299 --> 01:13:03,299 Sorry. 1588 01:13:04,885 --> 01:13:08,355 But you're right. She is an asshole. 1589 01:13:11,850 --> 01:13:14,390 Darnell, you are a real asshole. 1590 01:13:29,910 --> 01:13:31,200 Piece of shit. 1591 01:13:59,523 --> 01:14:00,523 I know what I'm gonna do. 1592 01:14:00,774 --> 01:14:02,694 - I'm gonna sue the pants off her. - Oh... 1593 01:14:02,734 --> 01:14:05,494 No, I'm not because she'll throw too many lawyers at me 1594 01:14:05,529 --> 01:14:07,659 and she's a shark in court. 1595 01:14:07,698 --> 01:14:09,948 Yeah. This is a test. 1596 01:14:10,284 --> 01:14:12,244 You want me to kill her with this bagel knife. 1597 01:14:12,327 --> 01:14:13,617 And I'll do it. 1598 01:14:13,704 --> 01:14:16,214 To pledge my allegiance to you, milady, I'll do it. 1599 01:14:16,248 --> 01:14:17,748 No. Thank you. 1600 01:14:19,001 --> 01:14:20,381 Ooh, you guys are kissing. 1601 01:14:20,836 --> 01:14:23,206 - Heya, Rachel! Hi. How are you? - Hi. 1602 01:14:23,255 --> 01:14:25,265 - Did you sleep over? - Oh, God, no. 1603 01:14:25,382 --> 01:14:26,842 What, have a sleepover here? Ew. 1604 01:14:26,884 --> 01:14:28,054 - No, he didn't. - Yuck! 1605 01:14:28,135 --> 01:14:30,185 - No, that would be terrible. - I don't know about "yuck". 1606 01:14:30,304 --> 01:14:31,354 I don't mean "yuck." I meant... 1607 01:14:31,430 --> 01:14:33,220 - Don't know if it'll... - I mean... 1608 01:14:33,265 --> 01:14:35,145 - It could be nice. - Might be nice. 1609 01:14:35,225 --> 01:14:37,265 - It's nice for people to spend the night. - We don't know yet. 1610 01:14:37,352 --> 01:14:39,232 - We don't know yet. - We don't know yet. 1611 01:14:39,730 --> 01:14:42,070 Would you please grab some more garbage bags? 1612 01:14:42,149 --> 01:14:43,649 We have a lot of trash. 1613 01:14:43,734 --> 01:14:44,864 Yeah. 1614 01:14:45,068 --> 01:14:46,698 Why did I make that so weird? 1615 01:14:46,737 --> 01:14:47,897 - It's fine. - Didn't have to. 1616 01:14:47,946 --> 01:14:49,406 Didn't have to make it that weird. 1617 01:14:50,157 --> 01:14:52,447 - Holy shit! - Language! 1618 01:14:53,994 --> 01:14:55,414 Holy shit! 1619 01:14:55,579 --> 01:14:56,789 Uh... 1620 01:14:57,414 --> 01:15:00,334 This is all seeming probably so much 1621 01:15:00,459 --> 01:15:03,379 stranger than what I had intended. 1622 01:15:03,420 --> 01:15:06,260 I'm sorry to startle you, Rachel. 1623 01:15:06,340 --> 01:15:08,430 What are you doing in my closet? 1624 01:15:08,509 --> 01:15:11,089 Well, uh, to give you the whole... 1625 01:15:11,136 --> 01:15:13,846 I thought I have a great idea 1626 01:15:13,931 --> 01:15:17,021 to surprise you with an apology, 1627 01:15:17,100 --> 01:15:19,560 and my sincere "I'm sorry." 1628 01:15:19,603 --> 01:15:22,983 So I let myself in, in the middle of the night. 1629 01:15:23,065 --> 01:15:25,445 So once I was actually waiting here in the dark, 1630 01:15:25,484 --> 01:15:28,114 and you were getting up for the morning, I thought, "Uh-oh. 1631 01:15:28,153 --> 01:15:30,783 "This could seem kind of threatening and menacing." 1632 01:15:30,864 --> 01:15:32,624 And I panicked a little bit 1633 01:15:32,658 --> 01:15:35,618 and just darted into the closet. 1634 01:15:36,203 --> 01:15:40,293 So, surprise! I'm sorry. 1635 01:15:40,374 --> 01:15:43,844 And, dang it, I shouldn't have sold that company. 1636 01:15:45,003 --> 01:15:46,883 I think we're done. Okay, well... 1637 01:15:46,964 --> 01:15:50,434 You know... So thank you, I guess, for breaking into my home. 1638 01:15:50,467 --> 01:15:51,927 I said I was sorry. 1639 01:15:51,969 --> 01:15:54,009 Great. We heard you. Okay. 1640 01:15:54,096 --> 01:15:55,926 - I apologized. - I heard you. 1641 01:15:56,306 --> 01:15:57,636 There's the door. 1642 01:16:02,145 --> 01:16:03,475 You sold us out. 1643 01:16:04,481 --> 01:16:05,611 Yeah, I did. 1644 01:16:05,983 --> 01:16:10,203 I sold you out. And I'm sorry. I'm very sorry. 1645 01:16:10,279 --> 01:16:14,949 And I'm hoping, somehow, you can forgive me. 1646 01:16:14,992 --> 01:16:20,122 And I just wanna throw it out there that I have completely forgiven you, Claire, 1647 01:16:20,163 --> 01:16:23,923 for trying to sell me out first with Renault so... 1648 01:16:24,668 --> 01:16:26,668 What are you talking about? 1649 01:16:26,712 --> 01:16:27,752 I saw you. 1650 01:16:28,255 --> 01:16:32,095 Okay? I saw you and Ronald outside the bakery. 1651 01:16:32,176 --> 01:16:33,506 He was smelling your hand 1652 01:16:33,552 --> 01:16:35,972 and I know what that means, okay? 1653 01:16:36,096 --> 01:16:39,136 I mean, he has smelled many of my parts, 1654 01:16:40,017 --> 01:16:43,477 and I have smelled many of his parts. 1655 01:16:43,854 --> 01:16:46,694 I was telling Renault that I'm not willing 1656 01:16:46,857 --> 01:16:49,687 to sell him a single, solitary brownie, 1657 01:16:49,735 --> 01:16:51,705 let alone my entire company. 1658 01:16:53,822 --> 01:16:55,782 That's a mix-up, huh? 1659 01:16:56,074 --> 01:17:00,704 Michelle, I would never in a million years do that to you, okay? 1660 01:17:00,746 --> 01:17:03,866 You know... I mean, God. What goes on in your brain? 1661 01:17:03,916 --> 01:17:05,036 I don't know. 1662 01:17:05,375 --> 01:17:08,745 I mean, I don't have a lot of, 1663 01:17:10,380 --> 01:17:14,760 you know, experience or a reference point for... 1664 01:17:14,843 --> 01:17:17,973 I didn't have a family, or a mom, or a dad. 1665 01:17:18,055 --> 01:17:22,275 And I totally get it if you never talk to me again. 1666 01:17:22,684 --> 01:17:25,404 So I don't want you to feel bad about that. 1667 01:17:25,479 --> 01:17:28,569 I just wanted you to know that I think you're very nice people. 1668 01:17:29,066 --> 01:17:31,226 Great people, actually. 1669 01:17:31,318 --> 01:17:35,358 You're the closest thing to a family I've ever had. 1670 01:17:35,405 --> 01:17:40,195 And I'm real sorry I screwed that up. 1671 01:17:42,746 --> 01:17:44,536 I'm gonna miss you, Michelle. 1672 01:17:46,792 --> 01:17:47,792 Should I go? 1673 01:17:49,086 --> 01:17:51,336 I think I should go. 1674 01:17:51,421 --> 01:17:52,711 - Oh, my God. - It's an awkward time for me 1675 01:17:52,756 --> 01:17:54,416 to just be, like, creeping around in the background. 1676 01:17:54,508 --> 01:17:56,428 I had no idea you were still here. 1677 01:17:56,510 --> 01:17:58,140 - Should I go, or should I... - No, you're fine. 1678 01:17:58,220 --> 01:17:59,640 I do not like what you did. 1679 01:18:00,347 --> 01:18:04,177 I do not like it! And I do not like it. 1680 01:18:04,810 --> 01:18:06,980 She really doesn't like it, guys. 1681 01:18:08,856 --> 01:18:09,856 You know, I... 1682 01:18:10,566 --> 01:18:15,106 If anyone's curious, I do think I know how to fix this. 1683 01:18:16,029 --> 01:18:18,869 I signed that contract with Renault late Friday night. 1684 01:18:18,949 --> 01:18:21,949 I wanna remind you I was wounded, I was a little tipsy. 1685 01:18:22,035 --> 01:18:23,615 - Oh, God. - Okay. 1686 01:18:24,079 --> 01:18:27,329 And it's Sunday. No one will be in his offices. 1687 01:18:27,416 --> 01:18:29,786 Plus, he can't file for a corporate change of ownership 1688 01:18:29,877 --> 01:18:31,747 until tomorrow morning. 1689 01:18:32,004 --> 01:18:33,254 I can get in there tonight, 1690 01:18:33,297 --> 01:18:36,377 I can get that contract, and I can take our company back. 1691 01:18:36,633 --> 01:18:38,133 Wait, what do you mean "get the contract"? 1692 01:18:38,177 --> 01:18:40,507 He must have scanned and emailed it a hundred times by now. 1693 01:18:40,596 --> 01:18:43,216 No, no, no. Anybody else, yes, but not him. 1694 01:18:43,307 --> 01:18:46,517 Ronald is completely paranoid about being hacked. Okay? 1695 01:18:46,602 --> 01:18:51,152 He has no cell phones, no emails. He leaves no digital trail. 1696 01:18:51,190 --> 01:18:53,480 Claire knows this. He's all old-school pen and paper. 1697 01:18:53,567 --> 01:18:54,937 It's the samurai way. 1698 01:18:55,444 --> 01:18:58,284 Okay, I'm in. Let's do this. I'm in. 1699 01:18:58,322 --> 01:18:59,572 Why would you be in? 1700 01:18:59,656 --> 01:19:01,066 What do you mean why would I be in? 1701 01:19:01,158 --> 01:19:02,158 You've been talking all morning about 1702 01:19:02,242 --> 01:19:03,992 how you wanted to get your company back. 1703 01:19:04,077 --> 01:19:06,827 And you guys are gonna need help, and I'm a helpful guy. 1704 01:19:06,914 --> 01:19:08,254 How's that for a reason? 1705 01:19:08,790 --> 01:19:10,170 You're gonna get rewarded for that. 1706 01:19:10,209 --> 01:19:12,339 Well, that's not why I did it. 1707 01:19:12,794 --> 01:19:14,844 - I'm in, too. - No, Claire. 1708 01:19:14,922 --> 01:19:17,012 This is my fault and I'm gonna fix it. 1709 01:19:17,090 --> 01:19:18,970 Michelle, this is my decision. 1710 01:19:19,009 --> 01:19:20,429 And I want our company back. 1711 01:19:20,511 --> 01:19:22,011 Yes, Claire. 1712 01:19:22,095 --> 01:19:23,965 All right, let's fuck this shit up. 1713 01:19:24,056 --> 01:19:26,176 - Language. - Sorry. I'm sorry. 1714 01:19:26,975 --> 01:19:28,475 I need to get a sitter. 1715 01:19:29,144 --> 01:19:30,404 Yeah, you do. 1716 01:19:32,481 --> 01:19:34,941 As soon as we get out I want you to grab the gasoline, 1717 01:19:35,025 --> 01:19:36,395 some rags, and torch the van. 1718 01:19:36,485 --> 01:19:37,575 What are you talking about? 1719 01:19:37,653 --> 01:19:39,073 I rented the van. It's on my credit card. 1720 01:19:39,154 --> 01:19:40,414 You go down, you go down alone. 1721 01:19:40,489 --> 01:19:42,119 How would we even get home? 1722 01:19:42,199 --> 01:19:43,989 That's a good point. MVP, Claire. 1723 01:19:44,076 --> 01:19:47,536 Uh-oh. There's no door handle back here. There's absolutely... Oh. 1724 01:19:47,913 --> 01:19:49,583 Thank you, Claire. 1725 01:19:50,123 --> 01:19:52,293 Okay. I still don't think you should be here. 1726 01:19:52,376 --> 01:19:53,376 But if we get caught, 1727 01:19:53,502 --> 01:19:55,752 I want you to tell the police that I forced you here by gun. 1728 01:19:55,838 --> 01:19:57,008 You gotta watch out for Rachel. 1729 01:19:57,047 --> 01:19:58,917 Okay. You don't have a gun, though, right? 1730 01:19:59,007 --> 01:20:00,877 - What am I, a thug? - Okay. 1731 01:20:00,926 --> 01:20:03,506 I'm such a badass! This is gonna be amazing! 1732 01:20:03,595 --> 01:20:05,885 Also, by the way, guys, I was googling jail sentences. 1733 01:20:05,973 --> 01:20:08,183 Since none of us are actually armed, minimal jail time. 1734 01:20:10,686 --> 01:20:12,806 Oops. Just excuse me for one minute. 1735 01:20:12,896 --> 01:20:13,936 Michelle! 1736 01:20:14,064 --> 01:20:15,194 Well, it's a collector's item. 1737 01:20:15,899 --> 01:20:16,899 Ditch it. 1738 01:20:18,277 --> 01:20:19,777 Chuckin' a gun in a garbage can. That's smart. 1739 01:20:19,862 --> 01:20:20,862 - What? - Oh, my God. 1740 01:20:20,904 --> 01:20:23,114 Okay! I know it was wrong. I self-corrected. 1741 01:20:23,198 --> 01:20:25,078 No, you didn't. I just asked you to throw... 1742 01:20:25,158 --> 01:20:27,448 Well, you made me throw it away. Okay. 1743 01:20:28,412 --> 01:20:30,332 Okay, there it is. Renault Enterprises. 1744 01:20:31,582 --> 01:20:35,382 The contract is probably in his private office, which is at the top of the building. 1745 01:20:35,419 --> 01:20:37,499 I'm guessing there's a safe, could be in the wall. 1746 01:20:37,588 --> 01:20:39,798 Could be behind one of those creepy paintings. 1747 01:20:39,882 --> 01:20:41,762 There's one guard on duty tonight. 1748 01:20:41,925 --> 01:20:43,465 Mike, I need you to distract the guard 1749 01:20:43,552 --> 01:20:46,302 while Claire lumbers in, and I follow behind like a cougar. 1750 01:20:47,055 --> 01:20:48,555 Okay, next, we head upstairs. 1751 01:20:48,599 --> 01:20:50,099 Claire, I'm gonna give you a head start 1752 01:20:50,184 --> 01:20:52,484 'cause I'm gonna take those motherfuckers 10 at a time. 1753 01:20:52,561 --> 01:20:55,151 You stand there with your mouth hangin' open, and pointin', 1754 01:20:55,230 --> 01:20:56,940 and I'll slide into home base. 1755 01:20:58,025 --> 01:21:00,035 Mike, I need you to distract the guard 1756 01:21:00,152 --> 01:21:02,152 by coming from the east, turning him around, 1757 01:21:02,237 --> 01:21:04,317 so when we approach, while you're sucking his dick, 1758 01:21:04,406 --> 01:21:05,816 we can get right past him. 1759 01:21:05,908 --> 01:21:07,278 So under no circumstances... 1760 01:21:07,326 --> 01:21:08,906 I'm sucking his what? 1761 01:21:09,161 --> 01:21:10,291 You're sucking his dick. 1762 01:21:10,370 --> 01:21:11,960 - I'm sucking his dick? - Oh. 1763 01:21:12,164 --> 01:21:13,334 Well, I'm not gonna suck his dick. 1764 01:21:13,415 --> 01:21:16,245 I'm the brains behind it. The brains never sucks the dick. 1765 01:21:16,335 --> 01:21:18,385 - Why am I sucking his dick? - I don't wanna suck his dick! 1766 01:21:18,462 --> 01:21:20,462 Claire doesn't wanna suck his dick! 1767 01:21:20,547 --> 01:21:22,757 How 'bout none of us suck that man's penis? 1768 01:21:22,799 --> 01:21:24,299 Yeah, what if nobody sucks his dick? 1769 01:21:24,384 --> 01:21:25,514 No dick suckin'. 1770 01:21:26,470 --> 01:21:28,600 Well, I worked on that plan a long time. 1771 01:21:28,639 --> 01:21:30,639 Fine. Fine, let's go to plan B. 1772 01:21:30,724 --> 01:21:32,144 Yeah, that sounds good. 1773 01:21:32,184 --> 01:21:34,944 If you're gonna be a baby and not suck dick, that's fine with me. 1774 01:21:48,659 --> 01:21:50,449 - Hey, there. - Hey! How you doing? 1775 01:21:50,494 --> 01:21:54,334 Is this 9800 Michigan? I'm late for a birthday party. 1776 01:21:54,414 --> 01:21:56,044 No, this is 9900. 1777 01:21:56,124 --> 01:21:57,714 - This is 9900? - Yeah. 1778 01:21:57,793 --> 01:21:58,963 - Well, wouldn't you know it? - Yeah. 1779 01:21:59,002 --> 01:22:00,172 Why are you dressed like that? 1780 01:22:00,254 --> 01:22:01,424 What are you dressed as? 1781 01:22:01,505 --> 01:22:02,515 I'm glad you asked me. 1782 01:22:02,589 --> 01:22:05,469 I am actually a demon. I'm a phoenix. 1783 01:22:07,344 --> 01:22:08,604 Pretty cool, right? 1784 01:22:09,137 --> 01:22:10,177 Are you into demons? 1785 01:22:10,973 --> 01:22:13,063 Yeah. I know a fair amount. 1786 01:22:13,141 --> 01:22:14,231 That is very cool. 1787 01:22:14,309 --> 01:22:15,809 You can touch the feathers if you want. 1788 01:22:15,853 --> 01:22:18,193 Yeah, a lot of people don't know that. It was a demon. 1789 01:22:18,272 --> 01:22:21,522 It's actually pronounced Quetzalcóatl. 1790 01:22:21,567 --> 01:22:22,897 He's talking too much. 1791 01:22:22,985 --> 01:22:25,405 He'd be a lot quieter with a penis in his mouth. 1792 01:22:25,946 --> 01:22:27,156 - I'm into demons. - You are? 1793 01:22:27,197 --> 01:22:28,367 - Yeah. - I think you said that. 1794 01:22:28,407 --> 01:22:30,157 I really am. I do a lot of fantasy role-play. 1795 01:22:30,200 --> 01:22:31,660 That's so weird. 1796 01:22:31,702 --> 01:22:33,542 Yeah, gets a little boring in here sometimes. 1797 01:22:33,579 --> 01:22:35,249 - I bet. - I whistle. 1798 01:22:35,330 --> 01:22:36,960 - You whistle? - I whistle a lot in here. 1799 01:22:37,040 --> 01:22:38,120 - Let's hear some. - Yeah. 1800 01:22:43,547 --> 01:22:45,257 Why is that one whistling? 1801 01:22:47,384 --> 01:22:48,724 Just kind of holding that one note. 1802 01:22:48,802 --> 01:22:51,972 Yeah, I like to do that. I like to play with bars and structures, things like that. 1803 01:22:52,055 --> 01:22:53,885 You got a real hefty lung capacity there. 1804 01:22:53,932 --> 01:22:55,432 I never got your name. 1805 01:22:55,517 --> 01:22:58,807 - Yeah, it's... It's Jim. Jimberly. - Jim? 1806 01:22:59,188 --> 01:23:00,938 - Jimberly? - Jimberly Stevenson. 1807 01:23:02,941 --> 01:23:04,321 What's going on? 1808 01:23:04,401 --> 01:23:06,991 It's a cramp! God, I got a cramp! 1809 01:23:07,070 --> 01:23:09,950 - Kenny! - All right. I can help you. I can help you. 1810 01:23:10,073 --> 01:23:12,333 - It's in the quad! No, it's in the quad. - Right here? Right here? 1811 01:23:12,409 --> 01:23:13,909 That's the top. That's the top. 1812 01:23:13,952 --> 01:23:15,082 Okay? Right there? 1813 01:23:15,120 --> 01:23:16,500 That's a little too close to the groin, Kenny. 1814 01:23:16,580 --> 01:23:17,580 That's a no-fly zone. 1815 01:23:17,623 --> 01:23:19,253 - All right? How's that? - Jelly. Back to square one. 1816 01:23:19,291 --> 01:23:20,751 - We're good? - Yup! Yup, yup. 1817 01:23:20,834 --> 01:23:22,294 - I don't wanna overdo it. - Phew. 1818 01:23:23,295 --> 01:23:24,885 Okay. Well, hey. 1819 01:23:24,922 --> 01:23:26,592 - Kenny, you're one of the good ones, man. - Yeah. 1820 01:23:26,632 --> 01:23:28,222 Yeah, not a lot of guys would do that for another guy. 1821 01:23:28,258 --> 01:23:30,048 - I'll do it for you. - Thanks, man. 1822 01:23:30,093 --> 01:23:31,933 - But we'll hang. We'll do it. - Yeah, we'll totally hang. 1823 01:23:31,970 --> 01:23:33,430 No big deal, buddy. All right, have a good one. 1824 01:23:33,514 --> 01:23:34,684 Bye, Jimberly. 1825 01:23:36,350 --> 01:23:38,600 That's an odd choice for a lobby sculpture. 1826 01:23:38,685 --> 01:23:39,685 He's an odd guy. 1827 01:23:39,770 --> 01:23:41,940 You know, they say he killed a man in Costa Rica. 1828 01:23:42,606 --> 01:23:43,606 What? 1829 01:23:48,278 --> 01:23:49,278 Oh, Jesus. 1830 01:23:49,780 --> 01:23:54,080 Jimberly. "J", "J". 1831 01:23:54,535 --> 01:23:56,455 Maybe it's "J-Y-M." 1832 01:23:56,954 --> 01:23:58,624 What the fuck? There's no Jimberlys. 1833 01:23:59,456 --> 01:24:01,246 Okay, well, where is it? 1834 01:24:01,291 --> 01:24:04,381 I'm sorry, I was a little tipsy last time I was here. 1835 01:24:06,463 --> 01:24:07,513 Oh. 1836 01:24:07,589 --> 01:24:09,469 - Oh, God! - Oh, my God. Guys, check us out! 1837 01:24:09,550 --> 01:24:11,800 We're total burglars. We burgle. We're burgling! 1838 01:24:17,224 --> 01:24:19,274 I feel like this is going great. 1839 01:24:19,309 --> 01:24:22,809 Michelle, you brought trash bags, baby wipes, shower gel. 1840 01:24:22,855 --> 01:24:25,155 Do you actually think we're gonna need rope? 1841 01:24:27,109 --> 01:24:30,489 Come on! Every story about a burglar always involves rope. 1842 01:24:30,571 --> 01:24:31,911 - That's true. - It's in all the movies. 1843 01:24:31,989 --> 01:24:34,159 I am a mogul, not a cat burglar. 1844 01:24:34,241 --> 01:24:36,281 I'm also the only one that thought to bring provisions. 1845 01:24:37,160 --> 01:24:38,750 Michelle, stop! I forgot, I'm sorry. 1846 01:24:39,538 --> 01:24:41,958 I stole the guard's keycard while he was massaging me. 1847 01:24:41,999 --> 01:24:43,249 You stole his key? 1848 01:24:43,625 --> 01:24:44,625 Yeah. Okay. 1849 01:24:48,005 --> 01:24:49,555 Somebody loves Mortal Kombat. 1850 01:24:49,631 --> 01:24:51,171 Let's just find the contract and get outta here. 1851 01:24:51,258 --> 01:24:52,678 - Okay. - I bet you he put it in his panic room. 1852 01:24:52,759 --> 01:24:54,259 That's what I'd do if I had a panic room. 1853 01:24:54,344 --> 01:24:56,354 It's probably voice-activated, high-tech stuff in here. 1854 01:24:56,388 --> 01:24:57,468 Open desk. 1855 01:24:57,514 --> 01:24:59,184 - Yeah. Open desk! - Open... 1856 01:24:59,224 --> 01:25:00,734 No, it was just manual. 1857 01:25:02,519 --> 01:25:04,519 I got it! In his desk drawer, 1858 01:25:04,605 --> 01:25:06,445 in a file marked "Darnell." 1859 01:25:06,523 --> 01:25:08,783 Probably overthought that one. It's classic Mike. 1860 01:25:08,859 --> 01:25:10,859 - I do that a lot. - Let's go! 1861 01:25:10,944 --> 01:25:13,074 Son of a bitch, Stephan! You left the door open! 1862 01:25:14,698 --> 01:25:15,698 Oh. 1863 01:25:16,408 --> 01:25:17,618 Well, who do we have here? 1864 01:25:18,577 --> 01:25:22,407 Michelle Darnell, the baker and Quetzalcóatl. 1865 01:25:22,497 --> 01:25:24,707 That is impressive. I mean, you gotta give him that. 1866 01:25:24,750 --> 01:25:26,380 I'm not even wearing the mask. 1867 01:25:27,044 --> 01:25:30,054 That wouldn't be our contract you're holding, would it, Michelle? 1868 01:25:30,506 --> 01:25:33,126 You wouldn't be foolish enough to back out of our plan, would you? 1869 01:25:33,217 --> 01:25:35,887 You know what? It was never her company to sell. 1870 01:25:35,969 --> 01:25:39,009 - I own 50% of it, so... - Yeah. 1871 01:25:39,056 --> 01:25:41,726 - I may have fudged the initial paperwork. - You what? 1872 01:25:41,767 --> 01:25:43,137 - But I am sorry. - So, I'm not... 1873 01:25:43,227 --> 01:25:44,227 - And I will rectify... - Michelle! 1874 01:25:44,269 --> 01:25:46,149 You will be. You will be. I'm sorry. 1875 01:25:46,230 --> 01:25:49,650 I wonder, how should I approach this? 1876 01:25:54,613 --> 01:25:57,533 Call the proper authorities and turn you in? 1877 01:25:57,574 --> 01:25:59,914 Or we could just talk it out amongst ourselves. 1878 01:26:00,744 --> 01:26:02,794 Do you know what the fascinating thing is 1879 01:26:02,913 --> 01:26:04,963 about the Japanese martial arts? 1880 01:26:06,083 --> 01:26:07,503 The discipline. 1881 01:26:07,668 --> 01:26:08,998 Ya! 1882 01:26:10,045 --> 01:26:11,375 The integrity. 1883 01:26:14,967 --> 01:26:16,427 The loyalty. 1884 01:26:18,679 --> 01:26:20,099 Okay, okay, stop! 1885 01:26:20,138 --> 01:26:21,348 I'll do it. 1886 01:26:22,432 --> 01:26:24,102 - I'll suck your dick. - What? 1887 01:26:24,142 --> 01:26:25,442 I don't wanna do it, 1888 01:26:25,519 --> 01:26:27,899 but if you promise not to hurt anybody in this room, 1889 01:26:27,938 --> 01:26:29,148 I'll suck your dick. 1890 01:26:29,231 --> 01:26:30,271 Mike, no. Whoa, whoa, whoa. 1891 01:26:31,024 --> 01:26:32,364 - Oh, my God. Mike, no. - What? 1892 01:26:32,442 --> 01:26:34,112 - You don't want me to suck his dick? - No. 1893 01:26:34,152 --> 01:26:36,282 Wrong dick, wrong time, Mike. 1894 01:26:36,321 --> 01:26:37,321 - Wrong dick. - Wrong dick. 1895 01:26:37,406 --> 01:26:38,776 It was supposed to be the security guy's dick. 1896 01:26:38,866 --> 01:26:40,196 I was trying to be a team player. 1897 01:26:40,284 --> 01:26:42,454 Real eager, Claire. It's a red flag. 1898 01:26:42,536 --> 01:26:43,616 I don't like sucking dicks. 1899 01:26:43,704 --> 01:26:44,914 It's not my business. 1900 01:26:44,955 --> 01:26:46,295 Nobody's sucking my dick. 1901 01:26:46,373 --> 01:26:47,503 Fair enough. 1902 01:26:47,583 --> 01:26:50,423 Well, that's the first time I've heard you say that, but... 1903 01:26:50,460 --> 01:26:51,460 I'm going to plan B, 1904 01:26:51,545 --> 01:26:53,135 my tongue has always been my sword. 1905 01:26:53,213 --> 01:26:54,213 Okay. 1906 01:26:55,799 --> 01:26:57,799 Put the knife away, Ronald. 1907 01:26:58,093 --> 01:27:00,803 It's not a knife. It's a katana. 1908 01:27:00,846 --> 01:27:01,966 Katana. 1909 01:27:02,181 --> 01:27:05,481 You're not gonna cut anyone with that knife and we all know it. 1910 01:27:07,144 --> 01:27:08,314 Oh, shit! 1911 01:27:08,353 --> 01:27:10,813 Big bird, blondie, over there! Go! Scoot! 1912 01:27:10,856 --> 01:27:12,266 Okay. All right, easy! 1913 01:27:14,818 --> 01:27:15,858 Oh, shit. 1914 01:27:17,237 --> 01:27:19,407 Are you crazy, Ron? I'm bleeding! 1915 01:27:19,656 --> 01:27:21,116 Give me back what's mine. 1916 01:27:22,492 --> 01:27:23,702 Michelle! 1917 01:27:25,245 --> 01:27:26,655 - Oh, hello, old friend! - Get off! 1918 01:27:27,664 --> 01:27:28,754 Oh, God, I've missed this. 1919 01:27:28,832 --> 01:27:31,252 God, you keep that shit tight. No! 1920 01:27:33,504 --> 01:27:34,634 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1921 01:27:34,755 --> 01:27:35,925 Michelle, get up! Get up! 1922 01:27:38,342 --> 01:27:39,512 Just get up. 1923 01:27:40,135 --> 01:27:41,585 Okay, let's be reasonable. 1924 01:27:41,678 --> 01:27:43,928 You know, I'm sure we can come to some kind of an agreement. 1925 01:27:44,348 --> 01:27:45,518 Oh, we're past that point. 1926 01:27:45,557 --> 01:27:47,807 For the first time in my life, I'm trying to do the right thing! 1927 01:27:47,851 --> 01:27:49,601 This is not about me and you! 1928 01:27:49,686 --> 01:27:51,346 You don't even want our company! 1929 01:27:51,396 --> 01:27:54,936 That's true, but you screwed me over 25 years ago, you bitch. 1930 01:27:55,692 --> 01:27:57,532 I thought sending you to prison would help, 1931 01:27:57,611 --> 01:28:00,661 but cutting you to ribbons is the only way I'll get satisfaction! 1932 01:28:02,699 --> 01:28:03,869 Had enough? 1933 01:28:04,868 --> 01:28:05,868 Shit. 1934 01:28:06,245 --> 01:28:08,255 - Oh, check this out. - Fucking psycho! 1935 01:28:12,042 --> 01:28:13,042 Back up. 1936 01:28:15,212 --> 01:28:16,212 Look at that! 1937 01:28:16,547 --> 01:28:18,417 Just a figure eight. It's like double Dutch! 1938 01:28:18,507 --> 01:28:19,547 That's not how you do it. 1939 01:28:19,716 --> 01:28:20,756 Yeah, looks like I'm doing it. 1940 01:28:20,843 --> 01:28:23,093 Look at that. I can bob, somebody can weave. 1941 01:28:23,178 --> 01:28:24,218 You see this shit. 1942 01:28:24,346 --> 01:28:25,886 Ow! God! 1943 01:28:28,892 --> 01:28:30,392 Huh? Twelve years of baton. 1944 01:28:30,435 --> 01:28:32,185 Everybody likes to make fun of the baton girls. 1945 01:28:32,229 --> 01:28:34,649 Seven, eight, one, two, three, four... 1946 01:28:38,902 --> 01:28:40,282 Just give him the contract! 1947 01:28:40,362 --> 01:28:42,862 No! I'm getting our company back! 1948 01:28:54,209 --> 01:28:56,799 I will cut you in your white meat! 1949 01:28:56,879 --> 01:28:58,089 - What? - Oh, my God. 1950 01:28:58,797 --> 01:28:59,837 Ha! 1951 01:28:59,923 --> 01:29:01,423 Now we both have swords, huh? 1952 01:29:01,508 --> 01:29:02,968 What is happening? 1953 01:29:03,051 --> 01:29:04,181 Pretty fucking literal, Claire! 1954 01:29:04,261 --> 01:29:07,511 We're having a sword fight. We're both fighting with swords. 1955 01:29:07,598 --> 01:29:09,928 I haven't been with another woman since I've been with you. 1956 01:29:10,017 --> 01:29:13,437 Really? I've been with hundreds of men. 1957 01:29:13,770 --> 01:29:14,900 You whore! 1958 01:29:20,319 --> 01:29:21,649 Oh, shit! 1959 01:29:24,281 --> 01:29:25,281 Claire! 1960 01:29:27,701 --> 01:29:29,371 - Michelle, let's go! - Michelle, come on! 1961 01:29:30,621 --> 01:29:32,161 It's been so long. 1962 01:29:33,540 --> 01:29:35,630 That's enough! It's too hot. 1963 01:29:44,426 --> 01:29:46,006 Wait a minute! Why are we running up? 1964 01:29:46,136 --> 01:29:48,296 I don't know, it was the only door. I'm doing the best I can! 1965 01:29:48,347 --> 01:29:50,267 I should not be running with a sword! 1966 01:29:51,141 --> 01:29:53,141 Okay, all right! Okay. All right. There's gotta be a way down! 1967 01:29:53,185 --> 01:29:54,605 Get away from there. Come here. 1968 01:29:54,686 --> 01:29:56,096 Michelle, I'm not so good with heights, you know. 1969 01:29:56,146 --> 01:29:57,306 I'm feeling kind of tingly. 1970 01:29:57,356 --> 01:30:00,526 Claire, look at me. You have been on a helipad before and it's gonna be fine. 1971 01:30:00,609 --> 01:30:02,939 Right. Right, but then they weren't chasing us with swords! 1972 01:30:03,654 --> 01:30:06,914 You make a good point. Claire, I'm sorry I got you into this. 1973 01:30:06,990 --> 01:30:08,320 Michelle! 1974 01:30:08,367 --> 01:30:09,947 God, I need to do more cardio. 1975 01:30:09,993 --> 01:30:12,163 Go over there. Go over there! Be careful. 1976 01:30:13,163 --> 01:30:14,663 You left so suddenly. 1977 01:30:14,748 --> 01:30:17,668 Okay, let them go. I'm the one you want. 1978 01:30:19,002 --> 01:30:21,802 You know, I killed a man in Costa Rica with this sword. 1979 01:30:22,589 --> 01:30:25,879 I guess you would call it my killing sword. 1980 01:30:37,563 --> 01:30:39,063 You're terrible in bed! 1981 01:30:39,606 --> 01:30:40,606 I know. 1982 01:30:41,859 --> 01:30:42,979 Oh, my God! Michelle! 1983 01:30:43,527 --> 01:30:44,937 Whoa. Honey! Let her go, Claire! 1984 01:30:45,028 --> 01:30:46,698 She's making a fortune in heaven. 1985 01:30:47,865 --> 01:30:50,035 Hey, hey. Hey, smile! 1986 01:30:50,075 --> 01:30:52,535 Okay, everyone take it easy. 1987 01:30:52,578 --> 01:30:54,078 I've been filming this the whole time. 1988 01:30:54,580 --> 01:30:56,870 Take the sword away from her or I swear to God I'm gonna hit "send." 1989 01:30:57,457 --> 01:30:59,537 Yeah, you're not gonna hit "send" 1990 01:30:59,710 --> 01:31:01,800 because I'm gonna chop your hand off. 1991 01:31:01,879 --> 01:31:02,999 No! 1992 01:31:03,046 --> 01:31:04,336 Oh, my God. 1993 01:31:04,381 --> 01:31:06,131 - Brother! - No! 1994 01:31:06,216 --> 01:31:09,506 Son of a... Samurai! 1995 01:31:09,553 --> 01:31:10,683 Shut up! 1996 01:31:10,762 --> 01:31:13,642 Oh, thank goodness! Michelle, are you all right? 1997 01:31:13,724 --> 01:31:14,774 I'm fine! 1998 01:31:15,058 --> 01:31:16,978 I'm about to feel much better. 1999 01:31:18,187 --> 01:31:19,557 - No. - Yes! 2000 01:31:19,980 --> 01:31:22,400 Be wrong to ask for your forgiveness? 2001 01:31:24,109 --> 01:31:25,739 It's Ron talking. 2002 01:31:26,904 --> 01:31:28,664 - Oh, Ron! - I'm sorry. 2003 01:31:28,947 --> 01:31:32,237 Renault, do you still need me to hold them at bay? 2004 01:31:34,411 --> 01:31:35,411 Oh, my God. 2005 01:31:35,454 --> 01:31:36,504 Come here. 2006 01:31:37,456 --> 01:31:38,456 Ow. 2007 01:31:38,832 --> 01:31:39,832 Ow. 2008 01:31:41,251 --> 01:31:44,881 Michelle, don't make out with the sociopath! 2009 01:31:45,088 --> 01:31:47,718 I know. You make a good point. 2010 01:31:48,300 --> 01:31:49,930 But this is really good stuff. 2011 01:31:49,968 --> 01:31:51,178 Victim here. 2012 01:31:51,261 --> 01:31:52,601 Michelle! 2013 01:31:54,765 --> 01:31:58,355 Michelle! He literally tried to kill you! 2014 01:31:58,435 --> 01:32:00,595 I know. But his mouth didn't! 2015 01:32:08,237 --> 01:32:12,067 Okay! Attention, everyone! 2016 01:32:12,115 --> 01:32:15,945 I just wanna say what a great first year for the Darnell's Darlings. 2017 01:32:15,994 --> 01:32:19,254 And what a great first house for Rachel and Claire. 2018 01:32:20,707 --> 01:32:21,787 Cheers! 2019 01:32:21,834 --> 01:32:25,884 Finally, they have a decent guestroom so I can stay over when I get blasted. 2020 01:32:25,963 --> 01:32:27,633 - Michelle. - What's "blasted"? 2021 01:32:27,673 --> 01:32:29,923 I'll show you in about three drinks. 2022 01:32:30,050 --> 01:32:31,840 - No, she won't. - I'm kidding. 2023 01:32:31,927 --> 01:32:33,137 But if I can, 2024 01:32:33,220 --> 01:32:35,220 can I take a serious note for a minute, 2025 01:32:35,305 --> 01:32:37,925 and I just wanna say I'm proud of you. 2026 01:32:37,975 --> 01:32:40,645 You've built a great family home here for you and Rachel. 2027 01:32:40,686 --> 01:32:43,976 And I'm awfully glad that I get to be a part of that. So. 2028 01:32:44,731 --> 01:32:45,901 Thank you, Michelle. 2029 01:32:45,983 --> 01:32:47,113 Thank you. 2030 01:32:47,150 --> 01:32:50,490 Oh, and thank you for the new sofa! You really shouldn't have done that. 2031 01:32:51,113 --> 01:32:52,823 Oh, well, I should have, though. 2032 01:32:52,865 --> 01:32:56,455 I mean, the old one was very uncomfortable and very dangerous. 2033 01:32:56,493 --> 01:32:58,333 But don't worry. I don't wanna hear it. 2034 01:32:58,412 --> 01:33:01,122 I did donate it to just the right person. 2035 01:33:08,172 --> 01:33:09,342 Hannah! 2036 01:33:10,299 --> 01:33:12,679 Michelle Darnell just sent us a sofa bed. 2037 01:33:12,759 --> 01:33:15,759 You know what I call that? A victory. I win. 2038 01:33:16,555 --> 01:33:17,725 Whatever. 2039 01:33:19,516 --> 01:33:20,846 Oh, it is comfortable. 2040 01:33:23,187 --> 01:33:25,107 Ah. 2041 01:33:26,106 --> 01:33:27,186 It's comfortable... 2042 01:33:29,776 --> 01:33:31,106 Darnell! 2043 01:35:37,863 --> 01:35:39,863 I may have had a little bit of your Scotch last night 2044 01:35:39,948 --> 01:35:42,988 and I got into the most wonderful chip. 2045 01:35:43,076 --> 01:35:45,246 It was called a Dorito. 2046 01:35:49,666 --> 01:35:52,336 I've had wonderful Vermont ched... 2047 01:35:54,713 --> 01:35:56,513 I'm so sorry. God, I'm a hack. 2048 01:35:56,757 --> 01:35:58,167 Hi, Rachel. 2049 01:35:58,217 --> 01:35:59,467 It's Rachel! 2050 01:35:59,510 --> 01:36:00,970 That's what I said. 2051 01:36:01,637 --> 01:36:02,637 One more time. 2052 01:36:04,556 --> 01:36:07,056 I'm an icon. I am not a professional burger. 2053 01:36:10,687 --> 01:36:12,607 But I like burgers. 2054 01:36:13,023 --> 01:36:15,153 I took the guard's keycard. Oh, fuck me. 2055 01:36:15,192 --> 01:36:17,442 I took the card from the geek. What the fuck is it? 2056 01:36:17,528 --> 01:36:18,948 I took the guard's keycard. 2057 01:36:19,029 --> 01:36:20,199 I took the card from the geek. 2058 01:36:20,239 --> 01:36:21,819 Oh, my God. Again. 2059 01:36:21,865 --> 01:36:22,865 Katana. 2060 01:36:23,367 --> 01:36:24,987 Oh, gosh. Sorry. 2061 01:36:25,786 --> 01:36:28,866 Stop picking up wood! Michelle! 2062 01:36:33,544 --> 01:36:34,674 Here we go. 2063 01:36:34,711 --> 01:36:35,961 Oh, God. I'm gonna pee my pants. 2064 01:36:38,549 --> 01:36:40,759 Oh, my God. No. Please give me one more shot. 2065 01:36:42,052 --> 01:36:43,052 You pop... 2066 01:36:44,137 --> 01:36:46,387 When you left my life... Shit. Fuck. 2067 01:36:46,473 --> 01:36:49,313 What was that? I should've been so... 2068 01:36:49,393 --> 01:36:51,733 Meryl Streep would've just kept going. 2069 01:36:51,770 --> 01:36:54,560 I stand corrected. Do you want some nuts? 2070 01:36:56,441 --> 01:36:57,571 So we can get to the elevators 2071 01:36:57,609 --> 01:36:59,109 while you're sucking his dick. 2072 01:36:59,653 --> 01:37:00,863 Wait. I'm sorry. 2073 01:37:00,904 --> 01:37:05,784 I'm so sorry. I saw it coming from a mile away. I'm so sorry. 2074 01:37:06,451 --> 01:37:07,991 Okay. I can get in there. 2075 01:37:08,078 --> 01:37:10,868 I can get the contract and I can take back our country. 2076 01:37:10,914 --> 01:37:12,044 What do you mean "take..." 2077 01:37:12,165 --> 01:37:13,245 God damn it. 2078 01:37:14,668 --> 01:37:17,418 I object to parolees attending our meetings 2079 01:37:17,462 --> 01:37:19,592 and I'd like to put that in the official transcreept... 2080 01:37:21,049 --> 01:37:23,049 I made a good business... 2081 01:37:24,678 --> 01:37:27,598 You know what? You made a good business... 2082 01:37:27,639 --> 01:37:31,689 Really? You fucking kidding me? I can't say "decision." 2083 01:37:31,935 --> 01:37:33,225 - Language, Michelle. - Yeah. 2084 01:37:33,645 --> 01:37:34,805 Good night! 2085 01:37:36,440 --> 01:37:38,110 You think they'll ever yell "cut"? 2086 01:37:40,068 --> 01:37:42,018 No. 2086 01:37:43,305 --> 01:37:49,914 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/xftz Help other users to choose the best subtitles