1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX

2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

3
00:00:17,767 --> 00:00:22,000
("Faith Hymn" by
Beautiful Chorus)

4
00:00:34,967 --> 00:00:37,300
-  A legend
in the Talmud says

5
00:00:37,300 --> 00:00:41,633
that when a child is born, it
carries a candle over its head

6
00:00:41,633 --> 00:00:44,400
as a symbol that it
knows everything.

7
00:00:46,067 --> 00:00:48,000
In the moment of its birth,

8
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:49,900
an angel blows the candle out

9
00:00:50,867 --> 00:00:52,633
and the child forgets it all.

10
00:00:53,733 --> 00:00:55,700
During the path of its life

11
00:00:55,700 --> 00:00:59,100
it must learn to remember
everything it had forgotten.

12
00:01:00,233 --> 00:01:04,067
(speaking in foreign language)

13
00:01:34,733 --> 00:01:38,667
("Learning" By Perfume Genius)

14
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:40,567
- Mommy.

15
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:48,767
It was 1991.

16
00:01:50,267 --> 00:01:52,733
My mom Nargess was 26 years old,

17
00:01:52,733 --> 00:01:55,167
and she was living alone
with me in Germany.

18
00:01:58,400 --> 00:01:59,333
Momma.

19
00:01:59,333 --> 00:02:00,867
I also had a father,

20
00:02:00,867 --> 00:02:03,533
but he couldn't be with
us for some reason,

21
00:02:03,533 --> 00:02:06,767
that's why we would send him
this video message to Iran.

22
00:02:08,567 --> 00:02:10,667
Iran was the country
we were from,

23
00:02:12,067 --> 00:02:14,433
but I could neither
remember Iran nor my father.

24
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:20,767
* Until you take
your last breath *

25
00:02:20,767 --> 00:02:21,800
* But you

26
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,267
-  Two years later,

27
00:02:23,267 --> 00:02:25,900
I just came back from summer
camp, my mother told me,

28
00:02:25,900 --> 00:02:28,567
"Your father Kasra, is
coming to see us soon."

29
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:33,333
And there he was, standing on
the other side of the street,

30
00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:35,300
dressed all in white.

31
00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:38,300
And I ran into his arms
as if I had just seen him

32
00:02:38,300 --> 00:02:39,600
before the summer break.

33
00:02:42,067 --> 00:02:45,067
The truth was last
time I did see him

34
00:02:45,067 --> 00:02:47,767
it was in one of the most
horrible places in the world.

35
00:02:49,467 --> 00:02:52,267
But, of course, I
didn't know about that.

36
00:02:52,267 --> 00:02:55,467
* No one answer your prayers

37
00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:56,733
* Until you take
off that dress *

38
00:02:56,733 --> 00:02:59,300
-  Today,
I'm 35 years old

39
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:01,400
and I know my father
couldn't be with us

40
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,967
because he was trapped in a
political prison called Evin.

41
00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:05,833
I also know

42
00:03:07,867 --> 00:03:10,067
I was born in that prison.

43
00:03:10,067 --> 00:03:13,400
And that's basically
everything I know.

44
00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:21,533
I mean I know I'm an actress

45
00:03:21,533 --> 00:03:24,600
and I'm pretty good at telling
other people's stories,

46
00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:26,333
but I'm at a point in my life

47
00:03:26,333 --> 00:03:29,400
where I don't wanna hide
behind those stories anymore.

48
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,833
I wanna find out
what my story is.

49
00:03:34,067 --> 00:03:36,100
But where in the world to start?

50
00:03:47,667 --> 00:03:51,567
(speaking in foreign language)

51
00:05:07,667 --> 00:05:11,067
For a long time I had been upset
with my work as an actress.

52
00:05:12,367 --> 00:05:14,600
I was tired playing
those cliches of refugees

53
00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:16,400
who fled from made-up horrors.

54
00:05:17,533 --> 00:05:19,400
I had been a refugee myself

55
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:21,700
and I had a story to tell.

56
00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:23,400
I mean born in prison.

57
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,467
Who in the world is
born in prison and why?

58
00:05:26,467 --> 00:05:30,200
The problem was, I had
no clue what my story was

59
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:34,100
and finding it out,
actually terrified me.

60
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:36,100
What I knew were bits and pieces

61
00:05:36,100 --> 00:05:38,533
my mother with
publicly speak about.

62
00:05:38,533 --> 00:05:40,500
Yeah, that's my mom today.

63
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:45,867
(speaking in foreign language)

64
00:07:03,467 --> 00:07:04,700
(audience applauding)

65
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:07,667
It is really true,
I mean what a story.

66
00:07:07,667 --> 00:07:10,067
My mom was somehow
released from prison,

67
00:07:10,067 --> 00:07:14,433
fled Iran as a single mother,
wrote a PhD in psychology,

68
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:17,133
and became the first
female migrant candidate

69
00:07:17,133 --> 00:07:18,400
for mayor in Germany.

70
00:07:19,533 --> 00:07:20,367
It's crazy.

71
00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,667
20 years ago she
met my stepdad Kurt,

72
00:07:23,667 --> 00:07:25,467
and gave birth to
my sister Mira.

73
00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:29,567
(audience applauding)

74
00:07:41,767 --> 00:07:46,267
(speaking in foreign language)

75
00:07:46,267 --> 00:07:47,933
That's my stepdad Kurt.

76
00:07:47,933 --> 00:07:51,700
He's a psychoanalyst and a
child of Holocaust survivors.

77
00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:55,133
He's a famous researcher on
how trauma is being passed on

78
00:07:55,133 --> 00:07:57,067
from one generation to another.

79
00:07:58,433 --> 00:08:01,233
Kurt's work has always been
a huge inspiration to me.

80
00:08:01,233 --> 00:08:05,133
Since 15 years, he meets with
Shoah survivors every week,

81
00:08:05,133 --> 00:08:07,500
listening to them,
supporting to them,

82
00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:10,633
eating lots of cake and
sharing a couple of jokes.

83
00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:14,267
- She's so young.

84
00:08:14,267 --> 00:08:15,200
(speaking in foreign language)

85
00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:16,267
She's so young.

86
00:08:21,533 --> 00:08:25,533
(speaking in foreign language)

87
00:08:26,967 --> 00:08:28,967
-  My sister
Mira is much younger

88
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,667
and was born with a disability.

89
00:08:32,533 --> 00:08:36,067
So in my family we say
we have got them all.

90
00:08:36,067 --> 00:08:39,367
People with disabilities,
foreigners and Jews.

91
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:45,133
My mom and I get
along super well,

92
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:47,867
but we just can't
talk about the past.

93
00:08:47,867 --> 00:08:49,600
Three decades of silence

94
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:51,433
and not once I had asked her,

95
00:08:51,433 --> 00:08:55,267
"Mom, what has happened
to us in prison?"

96
00:08:55,267 --> 00:08:57,167
And not once did she tell me,

97
00:08:57,167 --> 00:08:59,633
"Maryam, I think we should
talk about something."

98
00:09:02,767 --> 00:09:05,700
On a summer holiday I took
my courage in both hands

99
00:09:05,700 --> 00:09:08,633
and told her about my plan to
do a movie about our story.

100
00:09:10,067 --> 00:09:11,833
I even showed her a
trailer I had made

101
00:09:11,833 --> 00:09:14,400
and hoped that it would
open up the conversation.

102
00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,767
That we would finally
talk and cry a little

103
00:09:16,767 --> 00:09:18,900
and everything would be said.

104
00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:21,167
And in fact, she was very moved,

105
00:09:21,167 --> 00:09:23,800
but eventually the
conversation did not come up.

106
00:09:32,067 --> 00:09:35,933
(speaking in foreign language)

107
00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:13,867
It was too painful
for my mom to talk

108
00:10:13,867 --> 00:10:16,933
and at the same time, I
couldn't go on living in denial

109
00:10:16,933 --> 00:10:19,067
of the questions I had anymore.

110
00:10:19,067 --> 00:10:21,333
I had been in
psychoanalysis for years

111
00:10:21,333 --> 00:10:23,133
and I knew I was
pretty much sane

112
00:10:23,133 --> 00:10:26,333
and this wasn't about
me finding myself.

113
00:10:26,333 --> 00:10:29,467
Something about my birth
was just not personal

114
00:10:29,467 --> 00:10:31,600
and I had to find
out what it was.

115
00:10:39,133 --> 00:10:41,533
So what is it that I do know?

116
00:10:41,533 --> 00:10:44,533
I found this picture of my
mom before she fled Iran.

117
00:10:44,533 --> 00:10:47,233
She was 19 and already my mom

118
00:10:47,233 --> 00:10:48,967
and that wasn't a costume.

119
00:10:48,967 --> 00:10:51,933
She had no choice whether she
wanted to wear that or not.

120
00:10:51,933 --> 00:10:53,367
The law forced her too.

121
00:10:54,833 --> 00:10:57,767
In school I learned that my
parents grew up in a monarchy

122
00:10:59,233 --> 00:11:02,600
and the ruler and dictator
of the country was the Shah.

123
00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:04,367
Under the Shah, my
parents were allowed

124
00:11:04,367 --> 00:11:05,933
to wear whatever they liked.

125
00:11:05,933 --> 00:11:09,233
But everything else, like
freedom of speech, was denied.

126
00:11:11,967 --> 00:11:14,100
-  Could
a journalist in Iran

127
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:16,233
dare to criticize His Majesty?

128
00:11:18,133 --> 00:11:20,333
- He could, but I don't
think that he would.

129
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:26,300
-  The Shah and a
small minority of the country

130
00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:27,967
lived in fame and glory,

131
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,867
while the rest of the country,
was struggling with poverty.

132
00:11:34,433 --> 00:11:36,133
My parents were against that.

133
00:11:36,133 --> 00:11:38,633
They listened to John
Lennon, read Marx

134
00:11:38,633 --> 00:11:40,400
and sang "The Internationale."

135
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,933
(lively music)

136
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:45,967
And they were not alone.

137
00:11:45,967 --> 00:11:49,067
Massive protest spread
around the country.

138
00:11:49,067 --> 00:11:54,067
(crowd chattering)
(cars honking)

139
00:11:55,267 --> 00:11:57,567
That's when my parents
met, decided to marry

140
00:11:57,567 --> 00:11:59,200
and became revolutionaries.

141
00:12:01,933 --> 00:12:04,967
In 1979, the Shah
was overthrown,

142
00:12:04,967 --> 00:12:07,700
but the just and free society
they were fighting for

143
00:12:07,700 --> 00:12:09,833
would soon become their
biggest nightmare.

144
00:12:09,833 --> 00:12:13,767
(speaking in foreign language)

145
00:12:16,933 --> 00:12:19,133
Khomeini, the so-called
religious leader

146
00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:23,233
and just another dictator,
proclaimed the Islamic Republic.

147
00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:28,067
(speaking in foreign language)

148
00:12:28,067 --> 00:12:30,467
Tens of thousands of
political opponents

149
00:12:30,467 --> 00:12:32,867
got persecuted,
tortured and killed.

150
00:12:34,267 --> 00:12:38,433
In 1983, my parents were
arrested too, and me,

151
00:12:38,433 --> 00:12:40,167
who was still in
my mother's belly.

152
00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:44,900
Now what happened to us
there is the missing piece

153
00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:46,233
of our family story.

154
00:12:51,067 --> 00:12:52,933
My dad spent seven
years in prison

155
00:12:52,933 --> 00:12:54,433
waiting for his death penalty.

156
00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:59,067
He also survived
the massacre of 1988

157
00:12:59,067 --> 00:13:01,467
when thousands of political
prisoners were murdered

158
00:13:01,467 --> 00:13:02,833
in less than a few months.

159
00:13:05,467 --> 00:13:09,100
After his release, he sent me
this video message from Iran,

160
00:13:09,100 --> 00:13:12,167
trying to overcome the
distance creatively.

161
00:13:12,167 --> 00:13:14,567
(soft music)

162
00:13:30,300 --> 00:13:34,200
(speaking in foreign language)

163
00:13:57,667 --> 00:13:58,633
(fanfare music)

164
00:13:58,633 --> 00:14:02,400
(speaking in foreign language)

165
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,967
That's the first picture
of me taken after prison.

166
00:17:50,967 --> 00:17:54,800
It's kind of cute, but
what does that child know

167
00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:56,200
that I don't remember?

168
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,100
(speaking in foreign language)

169
00:18:02,100 --> 00:18:03,900
Interestingly, my
mom recommended

170
00:18:03,900 --> 00:18:06,467
I should meet our
friend Shadi Amin.

171
00:18:06,467 --> 00:18:09,333
She was a human rights
activist, a researcher

172
00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:12,067
and had interviewed hundreds
of female prisoners.

173
00:18:13,333 --> 00:18:15,300
She had a special technique
of working with them

174
00:18:15,300 --> 00:18:18,867
and had a agreed to
work with me too.

175
00:18:18,867 --> 00:18:22,767
(speaking in foreign language)

176
00:21:34,733 --> 00:21:36,900
(beeping)

177
00:21:45,467 --> 00:21:48,067
(lively music)

178
00:21:50,067 --> 00:21:52,067
I wouldn't give up so easily.

179
00:21:52,067 --> 00:21:54,533
I knew of someone else
who could maybe help.

180
00:21:54,533 --> 00:21:56,833
My aunt Sima in Paris.

181
00:21:56,833 --> 00:22:00,700
She was the first one we met
after our arrival in Germany.

182
00:22:00,700 --> 00:22:02,400
She was my father's sister

183
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:04,500
and I spent most of
my summer holidays

184
00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:06,667
with her and my
cousins and friends.

185
00:22:07,867 --> 00:22:11,767
(speaking in foreign language)

186
00:24:16,233 --> 00:24:19,367
(vehicle humming)

187
00:24:19,367 --> 00:24:23,267
(speaking in foreign language)

188
00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:07,333
This is Maryam, my
mom's oldest friend.

189
00:28:07,333 --> 00:28:08,900
They were cell mates in prison.

190
00:28:10,567 --> 00:28:13,367
She also lives in Paris,
and is a therapist too.

191
00:28:15,067 --> 00:28:17,067
On the weekends she
works voluntarily

192
00:28:17,067 --> 00:28:18,367
in a gardening project.

193
00:28:19,833 --> 00:28:22,700
She's the only one I know of
who was present at my birth.

194
00:28:22,700 --> 00:28:25,300
(hoe clanging)

195
00:28:35,100 --> 00:28:39,100
(speaking in foreign language)

196
00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:03,867
My mom was angry.

197
00:34:03,867 --> 00:34:06,067
Maryam had called
her after our meeting

198
00:34:06,067 --> 00:34:08,400
and apparently told
her that I was confused

199
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:09,867
and obsessed with prison.

200
00:34:16,500 --> 00:34:20,400
(speaking in foreign language)

201
00:34:30,233 --> 00:34:33,267
My mother wasn't sure
this film was a good idea.

202
00:34:33,267 --> 00:34:35,600
And I stared believing it too.

203
00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:38,867
I was about to cancel my last
meeting with Chahla Chafiq,

204
00:34:38,867 --> 00:34:40,933
the famous
sociologist and expert

205
00:34:40,933 --> 00:34:43,767
on the ideological
prison system in Iran

206
00:34:43,767 --> 00:34:46,367
when she urged me
to come meet her.

207
00:34:46,367 --> 00:34:50,300
(speaking in foreign language)

208
00:34:54,433 --> 00:34:57,367
(elevator chiming)

209
00:34:59,767 --> 00:35:02,600
(traffic humming)

210
00:35:07,300 --> 00:35:09,867
(horn honking)

211
00:35:23,067 --> 00:35:25,433
(woman laughing)

212
00:35:25,433 --> 00:35:29,367
(speaking in foreign language)

213
00:39:07,067 --> 00:39:09,967
(luggage clicking)

214
00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:33,633
(speaking in foreign language)

215
00:40:10,767 --> 00:40:13,167
(soft music)

216
00:40:16,867 --> 00:40:19,800
Chahla not only encouraged
me not to give up my quest,

217
00:40:19,800 --> 00:40:22,067
but also told me
that in Florence

218
00:40:22,067 --> 00:40:24,667
there was a feminist
conference held every year

219
00:40:24,667 --> 00:40:26,767
of Iranian women
living in exile.

220
00:40:28,167 --> 00:40:31,000
Not a few of them were
former political prisoners

221
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,033
who would maybe be
willing to talk to me.

222
00:40:34,233 --> 00:40:37,967
But I had to introduce
my project and myself.

223
00:40:37,967 --> 00:40:40,833
I had never publicly
spoken about my birth

224
00:40:40,833 --> 00:40:43,067
and the idea of talking
in front of them

225
00:40:43,067 --> 00:40:46,533
in my disastrous Persian
seemed really overwhelming.

226
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:49,667
But I had no other choice,

227
00:40:49,667 --> 00:40:52,467
and they seemed kind of nice.

228
00:40:52,467 --> 00:40:55,300
(singing in foreign language)

229
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:58,433
(audience applauding)

230
00:41:00,067 --> 00:41:03,833
(speaking in foreign language)

231
00:41:10,500 --> 00:41:13,667
(audience applauding)

232
00:41:15,867 --> 00:41:19,767
(speaking in foreign language)

233
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:47,433
Okay, I'm going to
speak in English now.

234
00:41:47,433 --> 00:41:51,900
So I know how difficult
this undertaking is.

235
00:41:51,900 --> 00:41:55,533
The whole project still
seems to be a very dark

236
00:41:55,533 --> 00:41:57,967
and stubborn dark hole

237
00:41:57,967 --> 00:42:00,733
where a lot of puzzle
pieces are missing

238
00:42:00,733 --> 00:42:03,967
and, therefore, I
reach out to you,

239
00:42:03,967 --> 00:42:07,433
specifically the mothers and
children of that generation,

240
00:42:07,433 --> 00:42:08,900
to talk to me.

241
00:42:08,900 --> 00:42:12,200
Me and my team will be here
for the next three days.

242
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:13,767
(speaking in foreign
language) Thank you.

243
00:42:13,767 --> 00:42:16,933
(audience applauding)

244
00:42:19,300 --> 00:42:23,200
(speaking in foreign language)

245
00:42:26,867 --> 00:42:30,700
(singing in foreign language)

246
00:42:47,900 --> 00:42:51,833
(speaking in foreign language)

247
00:49:08,233 --> 00:49:12,167
(chanting in foreign language)

248
00:49:38,067 --> 00:49:40,333
(laughing)

249
00:49:41,567 --> 00:49:45,500
(speaking in foreign language)

250
00:51:34,433 --> 00:51:36,300
(plastic bags rustling)

251
00:51:36,300 --> 00:51:40,233
(speaking in foreign language)

252
00:54:45,067 --> 00:54:47,800
So the child of my
father's executed friend

253
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,300
was probably still in Iran.

254
00:54:50,300 --> 00:54:52,567
Iran, the one
place I couldn't go

255
00:54:52,567 --> 00:54:55,533
without risking being
imprisoned again.

256
00:54:56,700 --> 00:54:58,800
In Florence, I hadn't
met a single other child

257
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:00,333
of my generation.

258
00:55:00,333 --> 00:55:02,733
But I was given some contacts.

259
00:55:02,733 --> 00:55:04,700
I wondered who they had become,

260
00:55:04,700 --> 00:55:06,667
what they knew of their story

261
00:55:06,667 --> 00:55:08,967
and if their mom's had
ever talked to them.

262
00:55:10,300 --> 00:55:12,467
Unfortunately, most of
them didn't wanna talk

263
00:55:12,467 --> 00:55:14,233
in front of the camera.

264
00:55:14,233 --> 00:55:17,767
But there was one girl who
finally agreed to talk to me.

265
00:55:17,767 --> 00:55:20,333
The night before our
interview in my hotel room,

266
00:55:20,333 --> 00:55:21,933
she left me a voicemail.

267
00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:29,533
(speaking in foreign language)

268
00:56:27,433 --> 00:56:30,600
(audience applauding)

269
00:56:36,500 --> 00:56:38,067
In Hanover, a conference

270
00:56:38,067 --> 00:56:40,700
of former political
prisoners was held.

271
00:56:40,700 --> 00:56:42,900
It was the hardest
one to get in.

272
00:56:42,900 --> 00:56:45,300
(speaking in foreign language)

273
00:56:45,300 --> 00:56:47,633
The experience had made
them very skeptical

274
00:56:47,633 --> 00:56:50,633
of anyone trying to
attend their gathering,

275
00:56:50,633 --> 00:56:53,233
but with the help of my
father we were allowed in.

276
00:56:54,667 --> 00:56:56,367
We had explained our intentions

277
00:56:56,367 --> 00:56:59,467
and still once we arrived
they asked me again and again

278
00:56:59,467 --> 00:57:01,333
who I was and what I was doing.

279
00:57:02,733 --> 00:57:05,733
The Iranian regime until today
sends their secret service

280
00:57:05,733 --> 00:57:10,300
to all kind of places, so their
fear was not unreasonable,

281
00:57:10,300 --> 00:57:12,300
but I was starting to
feel really pressured

282
00:57:12,300 --> 00:57:15,267
trying to tell the story
with all these restrictions.

283
00:57:15,267 --> 00:57:19,167
(speaking in foreign language)

284
00:59:14,733 --> 00:59:16,500
(raindrops tapping)

285
00:59:16,500 --> 00:59:19,067
So I was standing
outside this conference

286
00:59:19,067 --> 00:59:22,100
and somewhere really close
to me was a child of prison

287
00:59:22,100 --> 00:59:25,400
not wanting to enter the
building, very strange.

288
00:59:26,733 --> 00:59:29,633
At some point, I contacted
Shadi, our friend,

289
00:59:29,633 --> 00:59:32,400
and asked her for help
to find any other child,

290
00:59:32,400 --> 00:59:36,233
no matter where it in the world,
except for Iran, of course.

291
00:59:36,233 --> 00:59:40,133
(speaking in foreign language)

292
01:00:12,900 --> 01:00:15,300
(soft music)

293
01:00:15,300 --> 01:00:19,133
(singing in foreign language)

294
01:00:34,900 --> 01:00:37,667
(birds chirping)

295
01:00:40,133 --> 01:00:44,267
I had a dream last night that
I was arrested with my father

296
01:00:44,267 --> 01:00:45,400
and sent to prison.

297
01:00:49,467 --> 01:00:53,533
We were in a cell when guards
with machine guns entered.

298
01:00:53,533 --> 01:00:55,067
Each of them pushing a child

299
01:00:55,067 --> 01:00:56,633
and pointing their guns at them.

300
01:00:57,967 --> 01:01:00,267
I was convinced they
were trying to scare us.

301
01:01:01,667 --> 01:01:05,100
But then suddenly, one of
the guards pulled the trigger

302
01:01:05,100 --> 01:01:06,867
and shot the child
in front of him.

303
01:01:09,733 --> 01:01:13,200
I turned to my father to see
if this was really happening

304
01:01:13,200 --> 01:01:15,233
when one of the guards
stepped towards me

305
01:01:16,233 --> 01:01:17,467
and shot me in the head.

306
01:01:19,433 --> 01:01:21,467
I realized that I
was about to die

307
01:01:21,467 --> 01:01:22,967
and that everything was ending

308
01:01:24,767 --> 01:01:29,533
and while I was accepting my
death, I thought of my mom

309
01:01:29,533 --> 01:01:31,667
and that I still had to tell her

310
01:01:31,667 --> 01:01:33,900
that life actually is beautiful.

311
01:01:35,433 --> 01:01:38,067
(birds chirping)

312
01:01:38,067 --> 01:01:40,800
Was this dream giving me clues
to some hidden knowledge?

313
01:01:42,233 --> 01:01:44,467
Did other children of prison
have dreams like this too?

314
01:01:50,300 --> 01:01:52,433
There was a child who
had publicly spoken

315
01:01:52,433 --> 01:01:54,633
about her family's persecution.

316
01:01:54,633 --> 01:01:56,967
Back in 2012, in The Hague,

317
01:01:56,967 --> 01:01:59,233
where a people's
tribunal took place

318
01:01:59,233 --> 01:02:01,967
families of executed
political prisoners

319
01:02:01,967 --> 01:02:04,067
organized the Iran tribunal

320
01:02:04,067 --> 01:02:07,067
investigating the
massacres of the 1980s.

321
01:02:08,233 --> 01:02:10,633
One of the witnesses
was Chowra Makaremi,

322
01:02:10,633 --> 01:02:12,267
a child of my generation.

323
01:02:13,900 --> 01:02:17,200
- I was eight months old
when my mother was arrested.

324
01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:19,100
I was two years old.

325
01:02:19,100 --> 01:02:22,967
So she was arrested
on 15th of June, 1981.

326
01:02:22,967 --> 01:02:24,467
I was two years old

327
01:02:24,467 --> 01:02:29,167
when my aunt was
executed in October 1982.

328
01:02:29,167 --> 01:02:33,567
I was eight years old when
my mother was executed

329
01:02:34,733 --> 01:02:37,800
in the massacre of
the summer of 1988.

330
01:02:37,800 --> 01:02:42,067
What maybe I can
say to the court is

331
01:02:42,067 --> 01:02:43,800
what my grandfather wrote.

332
01:02:43,800 --> 01:02:45,067
I quote him.

333
01:02:45,067 --> 01:02:46,733
"We learned she had
been tortured at length.

334
01:02:46,733 --> 01:02:48,067
"Her spine was cracked.

335
01:02:48,067 --> 01:02:51,500
"The eardrum of her left
ear had been punctured

336
01:02:51,500 --> 01:02:54,733
"and there were burn marks
on several part of her body.

337
01:02:54,733 --> 01:02:57,433
"She had been whipped
with electrical cables,

338
01:02:57,433 --> 01:02:59,600
"plunged into a pool
of freezing water,

339
01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:01,867
"wires had been wrapped
around her breasts

340
01:03:01,867 --> 01:03:04,133
"and she had been
given electric shocks.

341
01:03:04,133 --> 01:03:06,567
"She had been burnt
with cigarettes.

342
01:03:06,567 --> 01:03:08,367
"Her teeth had been smashed.

343
01:03:08,367 --> 01:03:09,800
"Boiling water had been poured

344
01:03:09,800 --> 01:03:12,067
"into the sensitive
parts of her body.

345
01:03:12,067 --> 01:03:14,467
"She had been hung
upside down by the feet."

346
01:03:18,067 --> 01:03:19,300
That's all I have to say.

347
01:03:19,300 --> 01:03:21,300
- Again, sorry, and
thank you very much.

348
01:03:25,433 --> 01:03:28,067
The evidence speaks for itself.

349
01:03:29,267 --> 01:03:31,633
It constitutes
overwhelming proof

350
01:03:31,633 --> 01:03:35,767
that systemic and systematic
abuses of human rights

351
01:03:35,767 --> 01:03:38,200
were committed by and on behalf

352
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:40,533
of the Islamic Republic of Iran.

353
01:03:40,533 --> 01:03:43,800
Graves of executed
prisoners stretching out

354
01:03:43,800 --> 01:03:46,067
as far as the eye can see.

355
01:03:46,067 --> 01:03:50,400
Men were arrested at 10 in
the morning and dead by 11.

356
01:03:50,400 --> 01:03:54,067
Rows of prisoners were
shot by firing squad.

357
01:03:54,067 --> 01:03:56,067
The legacy of abuse is extensive

358
01:03:56,067 --> 01:03:59,633
and inevitably persists
to the present day.

359
01:04:00,767 --> 01:04:02,900
The commission concludes

360
01:04:02,900 --> 01:04:05,600
that these violations
of human rights

361
01:04:05,600 --> 01:04:09,367
were devised,
instigation and executed

362
01:04:09,367 --> 01:04:12,733
by a single, central
authority and as such,

363
01:04:12,733 --> 01:04:15,833
the government of the
Islamic Republic of Iran

364
01:04:15,833 --> 01:04:19,600
is the only authority
responsible for these acts.

365
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:26,900
-  Yes, that's my mom.

366
01:04:26,900 --> 01:04:31,367
She was there back in 2012
when the tribunal was held.

367
01:04:31,367 --> 01:04:33,800
Even though it was only
a symbolic tribunal,

368
01:04:33,800 --> 01:04:35,933
since the perpetrators
were absent,

369
01:04:35,933 --> 01:04:38,300
it was a milestone
for the survivors.

370
01:04:38,300 --> 01:04:41,400
But until today, the Iranian
regime remains in power

371
01:04:41,400 --> 01:04:43,967
and denies all responsibilities.

372
01:04:43,967 --> 01:04:47,800
(singing in foreign language)

373
01:05:20,133 --> 01:05:25,133
(audience applauding)
(audience cheering)

374
01:05:48,567 --> 01:05:52,500
(speaking in foreign language)

375
01:05:56,700 --> 01:05:59,067
I traveled back to Paris
to meet brave Chwora

376
01:05:59,067 --> 01:06:00,900
where she was working
on a documentary

377
01:06:00,900 --> 01:06:03,600
on the massacre of 1988.

378
01:06:03,600 --> 01:06:05,967
Yeah true, that's an
interesting parallel.

379
01:06:07,433 --> 01:06:11,333
(chanting in foreign language)

380
01:06:13,800 --> 01:06:16,333
- They are exactly
in the state of mind

381
01:06:16,333 --> 01:06:20,433
that I was kind of
pointing or denouncing.

382
01:06:23,533 --> 01:06:24,900
I think there is so much guilt.

383
01:06:24,900 --> 01:06:27,633
I think one of the key

384
01:06:28,833 --> 01:06:32,067
to the anger, to the
reluctance to talk,

385
01:06:32,067 --> 01:06:33,800
is the guilt, is the guilt

386
01:06:35,433 --> 01:06:40,433
because they survived, because
they lost the revolution

387
01:06:41,967 --> 01:06:45,933
and all the time
they're thinking

388
01:06:45,933 --> 01:06:50,933
of how could have
things been different.

389
01:06:52,067 --> 01:06:55,067
The people who were
children like us

390
01:06:55,067 --> 01:06:57,133
they live with this burden,

391
01:06:57,133 --> 01:07:00,367
but most of them don't
want to talk about it.

392
01:07:00,367 --> 01:07:03,100
It doesn't mean it's not
present in their minds

393
01:07:03,100 --> 01:07:07,433
and in their inner life,
and even if it's not present

394
01:07:07,433 --> 01:07:10,500
then there's a freezing silence

395
01:07:10,500 --> 01:07:15,433
and so they don't hear that,
but they don't much else.

396
01:07:15,433 --> 01:07:18,500
And that's why I called
my part the crossing,

397
01:07:18,500 --> 01:07:20,500
because you have to
cross through that

398
01:07:20,500 --> 01:07:22,967
and then when you cross,
then it's behind you

399
01:07:22,967 --> 01:07:27,233
and you're not afraid
of ghosts anymore

400
01:07:27,233 --> 01:07:32,233
because before I was, before
I read my grandfather's memoir

401
01:07:33,633 --> 01:07:35,833
I knew that he was talking
about my mother's imprisonment

402
01:07:35,833 --> 01:07:38,200
and tortures and execution,

403
01:07:38,200 --> 01:07:40,333
so I knew there was
something really terrible

404
01:07:40,333 --> 01:07:42,667
behind this door, I
didn't want to open it,

405
01:07:42,667 --> 01:07:44,767
but it was terrifying me,

406
01:07:44,767 --> 01:07:47,733
but then once I open
it and I saw it,

407
01:07:47,733 --> 01:07:50,867
yes it's terrifying, it's
gruesome, it's awful,

408
01:07:50,867 --> 01:07:54,067
it's very painful, but
you can name things.

409
01:07:55,233 --> 01:07:56,400
You can put names.

410
01:07:56,400 --> 01:07:59,567
It has a shape, but I would say

411
01:07:59,567 --> 01:08:03,133
as children of defeated
political opponents,

412
01:08:03,133 --> 01:08:05,967
who can each of them
totally stand on their feet,

413
01:08:05,967 --> 01:08:08,333
but collectively they
have been defeated,

414
01:08:10,833 --> 01:08:13,767
we are programmed to do well.

415
01:08:13,767 --> 01:08:16,233
We are their resistance.

416
01:08:16,233 --> 01:08:18,600
We are their answer
to the society.

417
01:08:18,600 --> 01:08:20,533
Like, you know look.

418
01:08:28,100 --> 01:08:29,800
And that's the point.

419
01:08:29,800 --> 01:08:34,800
So we all kind of, we
have become good adults,

420
01:08:36,067 --> 01:08:37,700
good responsible,
successful adults

421
01:08:37,700 --> 01:08:42,700
and that's the answer of
this generation to raise.

422
01:08:43,567 --> 01:08:45,167
Maybe it's not on purpose,

423
01:08:45,167 --> 01:08:48,700
but maybe we also feel
that responsibility

424
01:08:48,700 --> 01:08:53,700
to raise an army of
successful, beautiful people

425
01:08:56,700 --> 01:08:58,900
to show okay this is
what we wanted to do.

426
01:09:08,600 --> 01:09:11,100
(car humming)

427
01:09:27,367 --> 01:09:28,467
-  Chowra
herself had not

428
01:09:28,467 --> 01:09:30,267
been imprisoned as a child.

429
01:09:30,267 --> 01:09:32,900
But I had heard
about Nina in London,

430
01:09:32,900 --> 01:09:35,333
who guess what, was
a psychologist too.

431
01:09:47,233 --> 01:09:49,233
- Thank you, that's really nice.

432
01:09:49,233 --> 01:09:51,400
Thank you very much.

433
01:09:51,400 --> 01:09:52,633
It's beautiful.

434
01:10:00,167 --> 01:10:02,967
- Perfect thank you.
- Thank you.

435
01:10:02,967 --> 01:10:07,800
I think my experience
of time in prison

436
01:10:07,800 --> 01:10:09,533
it would only be one.

437
01:10:10,700 --> 01:10:14,633
When I was about 12,
13, I just kind of had

438
01:10:14,633 --> 01:10:17,233
the same kind of dream
over and over again.

439
01:10:19,700 --> 01:10:21,200
So the dream was that

440
01:10:22,567 --> 01:10:26,100
is this baby is held by this man

441
01:10:26,100 --> 01:10:29,600
and the baby is
crying hysterically,

442
01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:33,233
like really, really just
shouting and screaming

443
01:10:33,233 --> 01:10:36,900
and it's a woman in front of
her who's just being tortured

444
01:10:36,900 --> 01:10:38,567
and there's just
blood everywhere

445
01:10:38,567 --> 01:10:40,633
and they're just
hitting her and hurting.

446
01:10:42,133 --> 01:10:45,333
She's in a lot of pain and
just blood everywhere really.

447
01:10:45,333 --> 01:10:47,300
So I went and woke
my mum up and said,

448
01:10:47,300 --> 01:10:50,167
"Mum, I keep having these
really horrible dreams.

449
01:10:50,167 --> 01:10:51,500
"Well, same dream.

450
01:10:54,900 --> 01:10:56,433
"What is this?"

451
01:10:56,433 --> 01:10:58,900
And she goes, "Oh who told you?"

452
01:10:58,900 --> 01:11:01,800
kind of like, who told me what?

453
01:11:01,800 --> 01:11:06,133
So anyhow, when I told
her what I had seen,

454
01:11:06,133 --> 01:11:08,900
she was like, "Yeah
that's what happened."

455
01:11:08,900 --> 01:11:13,433
She expresses her experiences,
but it's never been where

456
01:11:13,433 --> 01:11:17,100
like how has that
made your feel?

457
01:11:17,100 --> 01:11:20,633
I see the impact every day.

458
01:11:27,300 --> 01:11:30,067
She won't really tell me.

459
01:11:31,600 --> 01:11:33,267
- Just because of
what you were saying,

460
01:11:33,267 --> 01:11:34,300
I don't know if you've heard

461
01:11:34,300 --> 01:11:36,633
about the
psychological phenomena

462
01:11:36,633 --> 01:11:39,067
that's called scenic memories.

463
01:11:39,067 --> 01:11:42,200
- Yeah, uh-huh.
- So my stepdad is working.

464
01:11:42,200 --> 01:11:44,533
That's like his field
and when I was 22,

465
01:11:46,533 --> 01:11:49,133
I was in Morocco
and I was taking,

466
01:11:49,133 --> 01:11:51,267
'cause I have no memories
of prison at all,

467
01:11:51,267 --> 01:11:53,900
like zero, nothing,
nothing, nothing,

468
01:11:53,900 --> 01:11:57,400
but then I was like 22
and I was in south Morocco

469
01:11:57,400 --> 01:12:00,333
taking a bus up to the north

470
01:12:00,333 --> 01:12:02,500
and then they were playing music

471
01:12:02,500 --> 01:12:06,633
and I was like getting
really kind of,

472
01:12:07,800 --> 01:12:10,367
starting to sweat and
being super stressed out

473
01:12:10,367 --> 01:12:11,633
and I normally didn't have that,

474
01:12:11,633 --> 01:12:14,067
i didn't understand
what was going on

475
01:12:14,067 --> 01:12:16,567
and then I realized that
I was really bothered

476
01:12:16,567 --> 01:12:19,067
by the sound to the extent

477
01:12:19,067 --> 01:12:21,700
that I started using
a towel around my head

478
01:12:21,700 --> 01:12:24,067
'cause I was like I
can't breathe anymore,

479
01:12:24,067 --> 01:12:25,533
I'm losing my mind in here.

480
01:12:25,533 --> 01:12:30,100
So I went to the bus driver
and they turned off the music

481
01:12:30,100 --> 01:12:31,867
'cause I was like
screaming at him,

482
01:12:32,867 --> 01:12:34,333
turn off the music.

483
01:12:34,333 --> 01:12:37,967
Anyway, months later I
told this thing to my dad

484
01:12:37,967 --> 01:12:41,300
and he told me that one
of, you know probably,

485
01:12:42,400 --> 01:12:43,500
it was Qu'ran.

486
01:12:44,467 --> 01:12:46,767
(speaking in foreign language)

487
01:12:46,767 --> 01:12:50,900
So yeah, they said one of
the acoustic torture methods

488
01:12:50,900 --> 01:12:54,167
was to play that.
- Really loudly.

489
01:12:54,167 --> 01:12:56,067
- Real loud constantly.

490
01:12:56,067 --> 01:12:58,467
So that was a first time
I was like oh my God,

491
01:12:58,467 --> 01:13:03,167
so there is some kind of
memory or something engraved.

492
01:13:03,167 --> 01:13:05,900
- They look good.

493
01:13:05,900 --> 01:13:06,800
-  Here you go.

494
01:13:06,800 --> 01:13:08,733
- Thank you, thank you.

495
01:13:09,767 --> 01:13:12,633
Thank you so much, that's good.

496
01:13:12,633 --> 01:13:14,467
I think it came to a
point when I realized

497
01:13:14,467 --> 01:13:17,867
a lot of my relationships
were kind of like

498
01:13:17,867 --> 01:13:22,867
I became the mother
and a lot of the times,

499
01:13:24,333 --> 01:13:28,200
the guys were quite, they
come from a very kind of,

500
01:13:28,200 --> 01:13:30,367
not a very pleasant
background as well.

501
01:13:30,367 --> 01:13:31,633
(laughing)

502
01:13:31,633 --> 01:13:34,367
And then you kinda just
wanna go and save them.

503
01:13:34,367 --> 01:13:36,900
My mother always says you've
got it on your forehead

504
01:13:36,900 --> 01:13:40,400
if you have issues,
psychological issues,

505
01:13:40,400 --> 01:13:42,333
please come this way.

506
01:13:42,333 --> 01:13:45,867
And it's unbelievable,
it's true.

507
01:13:45,867 --> 01:13:48,400
And I think yeah,

508
01:13:48,400 --> 01:13:52,567
maybe it's we think
they could relate to us

509
01:13:52,567 --> 01:13:55,400
because we think our
life wasn't normal

510
01:13:55,400 --> 01:13:59,667
and our life wasn't
normal really.

511
01:13:59,667 --> 01:14:01,833
Maybe we think they
could connect with us.

512
01:14:01,833 --> 01:14:05,100
And we clutch onto them

513
01:14:05,100 --> 01:14:07,500
and then we realize Jesus
Christ what have we done?

514
01:14:07,500 --> 01:14:10,067
- Well, I think
if we wanna change

515
01:14:10,067 --> 01:14:11,500
what's written on the forehead.

516
01:14:11,500 --> 01:14:14,933
Until now if it says all
psychopath men towards us,

517
01:14:14,933 --> 01:14:18,933
now we wanna change
that into healthy.

518
01:14:18,933 --> 01:14:20,100
I don't know.

519
01:14:20,100 --> 01:14:23,900
- Well proportionate,
mentally stable,

520
01:14:23,900 --> 01:14:26,067
psychologically.
- Balanced.

521
01:14:26,067 --> 01:14:30,200
- Balanced men, please
walk towards me.

522
01:14:30,200 --> 01:14:34,067
And anybody else who has even

523
01:14:34,900 --> 01:14:37,700
an ounce of stress or

524
01:14:39,700 --> 01:14:41,433
what's the right word?

525
01:14:41,433 --> 01:14:44,267
- Trauma, traumatic past.
- Traumatic past.

526
01:14:44,267 --> 01:14:46,900
No self-esteem, no confidence.

527
01:14:46,900 --> 01:14:49,367
Please do not come towards me.

528
01:14:49,367 --> 01:14:52,200
Take a left and
go straight down.

529
01:14:52,200 --> 01:14:54,133
(laughing)

530
01:14:54,133 --> 01:14:57,967
(singing in foreign language)

531
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:12,100
-  Nina had
gotten into prison

532
01:15:12,100 --> 01:15:13,833
when she was almost two.

533
01:15:13,833 --> 01:15:15,533
But I really wanted
to find a child

534
01:15:15,533 --> 01:15:17,933
who was also born in prison.

535
01:15:17,933 --> 01:15:19,900
What would it be
like to meet someone

536
01:15:19,900 --> 01:15:21,933
who experienced life
for the first time

537
01:15:21,933 --> 01:15:24,433
at the same gruesome place
where my life started?

538
01:15:25,533 --> 01:15:27,067
Would we have
something in common?

539
01:15:31,500 --> 01:15:34,067
After months of
searching, I had found one

540
01:15:34,067 --> 01:15:37,400
on the other side of
the world in California.

541
01:15:37,400 --> 01:15:40,100
Sahar Delijani, the
author of the book,

542
01:15:40,100 --> 01:15:42,633
"Children of the
Jacaranda Tree."

543
01:15:42,633 --> 01:15:44,933
She was born only
two months after me,

544
01:15:44,933 --> 01:15:47,267
so there's a chance
that we even met before,

545
01:15:47,267 --> 01:15:49,067
like baby prison buddies.

546
01:15:50,067 --> 01:15:53,933
(speaking in foreign language)

547
01:15:57,067 --> 01:15:58,100
- That's fun.

548
01:16:00,100 --> 01:16:01,667
I wanna do it next time.

549
01:16:01,667 --> 01:16:02,900
- Yes, you can.

550
01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:09,467
So the first chapter in your
book is a birth in prison

551
01:16:09,467 --> 01:16:11,133
and in order to research that,

552
01:16:11,133 --> 01:16:13,800
you did talk to
your mother, right?

553
01:16:15,233 --> 01:16:17,467
And you said that you kind
of grew up with knowing,

554
01:16:17,467 --> 01:16:19,267
of course, who was
born in prison or not,

555
01:16:19,267 --> 01:16:22,067
but did you ever have
that sit down conversation

556
01:16:22,067 --> 01:16:23,967
about your own birth
with your mother?

557
01:16:23,967 --> 01:16:28,967
- We were on flight to
Canada, going on vacation

558
01:16:30,133 --> 01:16:31,067
for a few days and
we were sitting

559
01:16:31,067 --> 01:16:33,100
and the seatbelt sign came on

560
01:16:33,100 --> 01:16:35,500
and then I thought okay,
so this is the moment.

561
01:16:35,500 --> 01:16:37,867
She can't get up,
I can't get up.

562
01:16:37,867 --> 01:16:39,200
Let's talk about it.

563
01:16:39,200 --> 01:16:41,067
So she was just sitting
right next to me

564
01:16:41,067 --> 01:16:43,133
and then I was taking notes.

565
01:16:43,133 --> 01:16:46,867
So yeah, that's the moment
when she told me the story.

566
01:16:49,300 --> 01:16:50,800
Something she doesn't really,

567
01:16:50,800 --> 01:16:54,533
she had never really talked
about to anybody you know?

568
01:16:54,533 --> 01:16:56,467
But she has these moments
when all of a sudden

569
01:16:56,467 --> 01:16:58,867
she says something.

570
01:16:58,867 --> 01:17:00,333
She was telling me the other day

571
01:17:00,333 --> 01:17:03,500
how she got angry at someone

572
01:17:03,500 --> 01:17:05,367
because of the thing
that person was saying

573
01:17:05,367 --> 01:17:06,900
and how her hands were shaking

574
01:17:06,900 --> 01:17:10,267
and she said, "Never in
my life my hands shook.

575
01:17:10,267 --> 01:17:12,600
"Never, not even in prison

576
01:17:12,600 --> 01:17:15,267
"when they would call
us for interrogation.

577
01:17:15,267 --> 01:17:18,533
"Everybody was like okay,
come on get dressed."

578
01:17:19,967 --> 01:17:21,200
My mom was like, "I
would always say,

579
01:17:21,200 --> 01:17:23,200
"they're the ones who
want to talk to me.

580
01:17:23,200 --> 01:17:24,500
"I don't want to talk to them.

581
01:17:24,500 --> 01:17:27,167
"They wanna talk to me,
so they should take,

582
01:17:27,167 --> 01:17:29,500
"I can take my time,
they can wait for me.

583
01:17:29,500 --> 01:17:33,067
"So I would just wear my socks
and put my blindfold on."

584
01:17:33,067 --> 01:17:35,133
She would talk about it as
if she was getting ready

585
01:17:35,133 --> 01:17:37,600
to go to a party or
something, you know?

586
01:17:39,067 --> 01:17:42,500
Then she's like, "But
this woman, this person."

587
01:17:42,500 --> 01:17:46,300
- Yeah, my mother, she
would never refer to prison,

588
01:17:46,300 --> 01:17:48,467
but now slowly since
I'm doing this movie

589
01:17:48,467 --> 01:17:51,867
she sometimes says something
and there was one time.

590
01:17:51,867 --> 01:17:54,300
She smokes, so my
mom stopped smoking

591
01:17:54,300 --> 01:17:55,800
and then she starts smoking.

592
01:17:55,800 --> 01:17:58,333
Like I did always, but now
I stopped for two years

593
01:17:58,333 --> 01:18:01,467
and she said, I said,
"Mom you know the smoking

594
01:18:01,467 --> 01:18:04,567
"why do you do it and stop
it and blah blah blah."

595
01:18:04,567 --> 01:18:08,067
And she said, "Well, it's
my expression of freedom."

596
01:18:08,067 --> 01:18:11,367
I like, "That's bullshit,
that's not freedom.

597
01:18:11,367 --> 01:18:12,933
"I know you think that."

598
01:18:12,933 --> 01:18:14,900
And then suddenly she
turns around and says,

599
01:18:14,900 --> 01:18:18,167
"You know my best
friend in prison,

600
01:18:18,167 --> 01:18:22,733
"when they asked her what the
last thing was that she wanted

601
01:18:22,733 --> 01:18:25,733
"before being executed,
she asked for a cigarette.

602
01:18:25,733 --> 01:18:28,133
"Just a cigarette, and
they denied it to her.

603
01:18:29,533 --> 01:18:31,667
"So then we went to a
corner and the last moment

604
01:18:31,667 --> 01:18:34,200
"they would take her and
pretend they would be smoking

605
01:18:34,200 --> 01:18:37,633
"and it was our
expression of freedom."

606
01:18:37,633 --> 01:18:40,300
(water rushing)

607
01:19:05,733 --> 01:19:07,200
On the other side of the world

608
01:19:07,200 --> 01:19:09,400
I came to understand
that, in fact,

609
01:19:09,400 --> 01:19:12,367
it was never about my
mom's silence, but mine.

610
01:19:13,533 --> 01:19:15,800
It wasn't about her
answers, but about me

611
01:19:15,800 --> 01:19:17,767
phrasing my questions.

612
01:19:17,767 --> 01:19:20,433
(water gushing)

613
01:19:22,700 --> 01:19:24,800
When you got to prison,
did you tell them

614
01:19:24,800 --> 01:19:25,967
that you were pregnant?

615
01:19:28,067 --> 01:19:30,233
And did they really
kick you in the stomach?

616
01:19:31,867 --> 01:19:33,600
Did you wonder if I may be dead?

617
01:19:35,300 --> 01:19:37,500
Did you talk to me when
I was in your belly?

618
01:19:39,300 --> 01:19:41,467
Were you worried that
they'd kill my dad?

619
01:19:46,467 --> 01:19:49,533
Is it true that you had to
give birth to me blindfolded?

620
01:19:50,500 --> 01:19:51,967
And did you not see me then?

621
01:19:54,233 --> 01:19:56,467
Did they torture you
and was I present?

622
01:19:57,867 --> 01:20:00,500
Why and when was I given out?

623
01:20:00,500 --> 01:20:01,900
And how was that for you?

624
01:20:03,100 --> 01:20:05,633
What happened when
you were released?

625
01:20:05,633 --> 01:20:07,200
Did I recognize you then?

626
01:20:08,433 --> 01:20:09,933
If not, I'm really sorry.

627
01:20:11,667 --> 01:20:14,233
Did you ever plan to talk
to me about all this?

628
01:20:15,667 --> 01:20:19,633
But the truth is, it's not
even about all these questions.

629
01:20:22,467 --> 01:20:24,067
But that I wanna tell you

630
01:20:24,067 --> 01:20:25,933
I'm not afraid of
ghosts anymore.

631
01:20:27,233 --> 01:20:29,633
You only need a candle
to light darkness.

632
01:20:33,100 --> 01:20:36,000
And most importantly,
I wanna tell you

633
01:20:36,000 --> 01:20:38,500
I'm sorry for all you
had to go through.

634
01:20:46,767 --> 01:20:49,500
(water slapping)

635
01:20:57,467 --> 01:21:01,333
(speaking in foreign language)

636
01:26:09,900 --> 01:26:12,667
(match sparking)

637
01:26:23,700 --> 01:26:27,600
(speaking in foreign language)

638
01:28:01,900 --> 01:28:04,733
(plates clanging)

639
01:28:07,200 --> 01:28:11,133
(speaking in foreign language)

640
01:28:36,200 --> 01:28:40,067
(singing in foreign language)

641
01:29:18,833 --> 01:29:22,767
(speaking in foreign language)

642
01:29:59,833 --> 01:30:02,133
(laughing)

643
01:30:02,133 --> 01:30:06,067
(speaking in foreign language)

644
01:31:00,867 --> 01:31:03,767
(soft piano music)

645
01:31:31,200 --> 01:31:34,433
* No one will answer
your prayers *

646
01:31:34,433 --> 01:31:38,600
* Until you take
off that dress *

647
01:31:38,600 --> 01:31:42,267
* No one will hear
all your crying *

648
01:31:42,267 --> 01:31:46,200
* Until you take
your last breath *

649
01:31:46,200 --> 01:31:48,067
* But you

650
01:31:48,067 --> 01:31:49,867
* Will learn

651
01:31:49,867 --> 01:31:53,700
* To mind me

652
01:31:53,700 --> 01:31:57,700
* And you will learn

653
01:31:57,700 --> 01:32:00,367
* To survive me

654
01:32:17,367 --> 01:32:19,267
* Your father before you

655
01:32:19,267 --> 01:32:21,200
* And your sister too

656
01:32:21,200 --> 01:32:24,233
* Your husband and
blah, blah, blah, blah *

657
01:32:24,233 --> 01:32:26,067
* You

658
01:32:50,767 --> 01:32:55,067
("Faith Hymn" by
Beautiful Chorus)