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(soft reflective guitar music)
- Hey, Samantha.
- Yeah, Ben, right?
- That's me.
Here, let me help.
- Okay, thanks.
- Yeah, no worries.
Natalie called me three times this morning
to make sure I was gonna get here on time.
- Yeah, we haven't seen each other in awhile.
I guess she still likes me.
- That's good.
Because I still haven't gotten her a present.
(phone ringing) So I may say that...
Hello?
- [Natalie] Hey, do you have her?
- Hi, Nats.
- [Natalie] Sammy!
Oh, I'm so excited.
Ben, drive faster.
When are you guys gonna get here?
- Probably not for awhile.
We just got out of LA.
Might be after seven.
- [Natalie] Are you guys on the five?
- No, we're no the 101.
- [Natalie] 101?
Why?
No, get back on the five.
It's not too late.
- The five sucks.
- [Natalie] Sammy, don't you want to see me?
- I want to see the ocean, darling.
- [Natalie] It's my birthday, asshole.
- We'll be together soon, Nat, I promise.
- [Natalie] Okay.
And Benjamin, feel free to crash at my place, too.
I don't know what your situation is.
- I'll be fine.
I'm staying with my sister in the city.
- [Natalie] Whoa, in the city.
Aren't you cool.
- You know it, Cronkite.
- [Natalie] Ben, it's my birthday.
- [Ben] All right, Nat.
We'll call you when we're getting close.
- [Natalie] Call me when you're in Gilroy.
- Yeah, all right, see ya.
- Love you. - Bye, beautiful.
Love you, too.
Ben, you better bring me a really fancy gift
it better have (phone beeping).
(laughing)
- [Sam] Cronkite?
- [Ben] Yeah, you should ask her about that.
- [Sam] Thanks for driving.
- I fucking love this drive.
- Me, too.
It's like once you get over that big hill
the world opens up and the city's gone.
It finally starts smelling like ocean air
and celery and strawberries.
It's like nothing behind that hill matters anymore.
Have you seen "Spirited Away?"
- Yes.
- It's like when that little girl goes
through the tunnel to the other world.
It's totally magical.
- Yeah.
And then her parents get turned into pigs
and she gets enslaved by a witch
that gave me nightmares until I was 12.
- Yes but she saves the day and she meets Haku.
- Yeah. - Love that story.
- It's definitely tied for best animated movie
of all time.
- Tied?
What else is there?
- Oh, "WALL-E."
- [Sam] Oh yeah.
- Barriers are a big things in stories.
Crossing from one side to the other.
Like in Greek mythology
they used to put a coin in the mouth of the dead
so that they could pay the ferryman
to take them to the afterlife.
- Yeah nothing spiritual
doesn't have some sort of crossing.
I think it's a way to symbolize things
that we don't quite understand
like concepts like love and death and change.
They're so intense, we almost need something physical
to transcend it so that we can say
that it actually happened.
Like here, after this moment, things were different.
- You ever felt something like that before?
- You know I am human.
As much as it may seem otherwise.
- Hey, mind if we're another 30 minutes late?
I have a little detour I think would be fun.
- [Sam] Sure, sounds exciting.
(soft guitar music)
Have you lived here your whole life?
- [Ben] Yeah, pretty much.
What about you?
- [Sam] I was born in New York
but we moved here when I was 12, so.
- [Ben] You miss it?
- [Sam] Yeah, I go back for holidays and stuff
but it will always feel like home.
It's weird how two places that are so different
and so far apart can give you that same feeling.
- [Ben] You're gonna kill me after you die.
- You're gonna murder. - Or.
- [Sam] No you're gonna murder,
I'm gonna see it coming
and I'm just gonna push you off the cliff.
- [Ben] You're figuring out my elaborate plan.
- [Sam] I figured it out, yes.
- Well then. - Water.
(laughing)
- [Ben] I'm not even sure you what just said.
(laughing)
- [Sam] It's a classic murder.
The guy with the hood popped up.
- He supposedly needs help. - Needing help.
- Yeah. - Oh, fuck this place, dude.
- All right.
Welcome. - What have you done?
- Let's go.
Trust me, it's gonna be cool.
- [Sam] Are you sure?
- Yeah, it will be really cool.
Yeah yeah.
Right over here.
- Okay, so how did you find this place?
It's really fucking creepy.
- I've been up here rocking climbing a few times.
I like the sandstone, you know, the shapes.
- Yeah, I used to boulder a little bit.
- Why'd you stop?
- I still do but at a certain point
you have to start going to the gym like crazy
and no ones got time for that.
- Oh, so you saying you weak?
- I'm stronger than you.
Wanna see, let's go.
- Oh, I think I need new glasses.
- Maybe this is where I murder you.
Okay, this way?
- Yeah.
(grunting)
- Easy.
Shit.
You good?
- I'm good. - All right.
- It's slippery.
- Yeah.
Wanna sit?
So you know anymore detours?
- Well.
There's the five, which sucks.
The 101 which is pretty nice.
- Then there's the one.
- And then there's the one.
(soft upbeat guitar music)
- That sounds nice.
♪ Come closer ♪
♪ To the bridge of my nose ♪
♪ Baby ♪
♪ Do you like this ♪
♪ Being downstairs alone ♪
♪ In the basement with the TV on ♪
So you are Natalie's other LA friend?
I've heard lots about you.
- [Ben] Oh I have a reputation.
- And I'm in the car with him for another seven hours
and all I'm saying is that I don't want
to get paid today, you know what I mean?
- That's not what I said.
- It's what you said.
- Let the record show I did not say that.
I said that there are places that I know of
that is a thing.
- The fact that you know of these places
is really awkward.
♪ Do you wanna stay like this ♪
♪ Forever ♪
♪ Or just a day ♪
♪ Either way I'm sure ♪
♪ It's okay. We'll see what my dad has to say ♪
♪ In the morning ♪
♪ Now that we've ♪
♪ Covered all of the places ♪
♪ I think I like you ♪
♪ But I wouldn't even tell you ♪
♪ That yet ♪
♪ 'cause it'd scare you ♪
♪ Do you want to recreate senior prom? ♪
♪ Mine was shit but I'm sure yours was good. ♪
♪ Did they play this song in the gym room? ♪
♪ So can you drive now? ♪
♪ Let's just drive now ♪
Haven't done that since I was a kid.
- Drank a beer?
- No.
- I was gonna say, that's a long time to quit drinking.
- No, drive up the one.
- Right.
- I forgot how nice it is.
- Yeah.
I try to do that drive like once a year.
Even for no reason.
Best part is that for a huge stretch
there's no cell service.
- Yeah, I noticed that.
- Imagine when we have service everywhere, though.
Then we'll have no excuse.
It will be like someone knocking on your door
but they know that you're home.
- Isn't that kinda what Santa Claus is for?
Not to spread joy and giving and family
and coming together
but to show that it's okay to lie sometimes.
- I don't know.
Santa?
No one gets away with that lie.
You either find out on your own
or from Peter Jansberg's older brother
when he wants to see you cry.
- Touchy subject?
- They were Jewish.
- Everyone's gotta lie sometimes, though.
I'm lying right now.
My aunts, I have a crazy family, they're super weird
but my aunts are having a seance for my Mom.
They wanted me to be their spirit anchor,
whatever the fuck that means.
- For your mom?
- Yeah, she, she passed away.
It's, don't, it's okay, sorry. - I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
But anyway, yeah.
Fucking seance.
So to them, Santa Claus is alive and well.
Like, what am I supposed to do be like,
hey guys, I'd rather Ouija board Hannibal Lecter
than hang out with the ladies this weekend.
No.
- You know I'm actually a professional spirit anchor
so if you need any tips, or, you know.
I'm sorry.
That was a terrible joke.
- Careful, I'm gonna call my friend
mister lotion in the basket.
- That does qualify for some crazy family behavior, though.
- They mean well, I guess.
They love me but,
if it helps, who I am to kill Santa Claus and ruin it?
And if they honestly believe
that they're gonna talk to my mom
I mean if I believed that then, yeah.
- Wow.
Having an incredible personal thought just then.
- No, not really. - It's none of my business,
you don't have to share it.
Just.
- Not really.
- What were you thinking about?
- [Sam] Maybe you gotta earn that one.
- [Ben] You know the moon looks different
to people on the other side of the equator?
- [Sam] Really?
- [Ben] Yeah.
- [Sam] Just full of thoughts, aren't you?
- What's something you believe in
that you can't necessarily prove?
- Hmm.
Aliens.
- That's a good one.
If you were first contact, what would you do?
- What would I do?
- Yeah.
An alien comes down off of his flying saucer
or whatever and he comes there
and you are the first Earth being that he encounters.
What do you do?
- It depends.
Does he want to kill me?
- I don't know, who knows.
He's standing there, he's looking at you,
he's probably judging you by now
because you're taking so long to respond.
Maybe there is no intelligent life
on this planet after all.
- Okay, hi, hello.
- Hi, hello? - Yeah, hi, hello.
That's what I'd do.
- Wow.
He just ate you because he assumed you had no consciousness.
- What would you do?
That's it?
- Yeah.
Circle says a lot.
Fine, if he's not satisfied I'll draw some dots.
Okay, now I have a circle and some dots.
No way he doesn't recognize my brilliance.
- Maybe there is no intelligent life after all.
Is that us?
- That's us.
"On it, everyone you love, everyone you know.
Everyone you ever heard of.
Every human being who ever was lived out their lives."
- [Sam] Will you read some more?
- "She was a wonder junkie.
In her mind, she was a hill tribesman
standing slack jawed before the real Ishtar gate
of ancient Babel.
Dorothy, catching her first glimpse
of the vaulted spires of the emerald city of Oz.
She was Pocahontas, sailing up the Thames estuary
with London spread out before her
from horizon to horizon."
- Hi.
- About time.
- I'm sorry.
(laughing)
Hi.
- What took you so long?
- Hey, sorry.
- We were driving.
- Cute, cute, love it.
- Hi. - Hi.
- Oh my god, Nat.
- What?
- I saw Victor Flores on Onegle.
- No.
- Like a month ago.
I was just fucking around.
- Who's this? - Yeah, who is that?
- Oh she was in love with him in high school.
- Oh my God, it was a crush.
- Yeah, okay.
You took that stupid photography class
for like four years just for him.
- Okay, he was hot.
Plus I got really good at taking photos.
Does anyone want to see one of my more famous photos?
It's of Nat homecoming,
senior year. - All right, no, no, no.
We are not playing this game. - Yeah, yeah I wanna see that.
- Kevin. - No, I wanna see it, too.
- I have it, I have it. - How did this
become about me?
I think that we should really just bring it back to Victor.
- Oh, Victor Flores.
God, I swear he is the only reason
I ever started touching myself.
- Me, too.
- Mine was Tori Black.
(laughing)
- Was she one of the popular kids?
- This one time, I really wanted Hot Cheetos
and I wanted to go to the nice vending machine
on the other side of the boy's locker room.
You know what goes down there.
- Cooties.
- Worse.
So I just want my chips
and I have the money
and of course the Hot Cheetos
get stuck in the little curly thing
and all the football guys come over
and they start hitting it
and they're like grabbing it
and I just want to get out of there
and I was like,
this thing is gonna break.
We're all gonna get in trouble.
I'm never gonna go to college.
And then Victor shows up.
God, that beautiful man.
He rolls up his sleeves
and he pulls out a dollar
and I swear, he just walks straight up
to me with two bags of chips and just goes,
here's one for later.
- Go fuck yourself. (laughing)
- I did.
I did do that.
I did.
- You know, in high school, I played soccer
and there-- - Oh, babe.
Babe, don't, don't try to beat Victor Flores.
You're not Victor Flores.
That's because you are so much better than Victor.
- [Kevin] I'm better than Victor Flores?
- Oh yeah. - Yeah?
- Well, am I bigger than Victor Flores?
- So much bigger.
- [Kevin] Say my name, baby.
- Mhm, Victor.
- Oh yeah, come on, all right.
Seriously.
(laughing)
- Very good.
Good save, good save.
- I'm sorry.
- I don't think you are.
- I'm not.
But tell us about soccer.
- I couldn't.
The stories gone.
- Oh come on, we wanna hear about your glory days.
- All right, all right, so coach let me play forward.
- He's so excited. - Big game, right,
semifinals.
- Hey.
Forgot your jacket.
- Oh.
- So. - Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Thanks for driving today.
- Yeah, no worries.
Actually had a lot of fun.
- Yeah, it was a lot of fun.
- So you know what Natalie's doing, right?
- She's doing it to you, too?
- Uh huh.
- What should we do about it?
- I don't know.
Don't really want to give her the satisfaction.
She's hold it over us forever.
- That's definitely true.
- What do you think?
- Uh, uh I don't have the confidence
to answer that question.
- What time are you getting here tomorrow?
- Probably a little before eight, I guess,
depends on when I can convince my sister
to get out the door.
- Okay.
Well I'll see you then?
- Yeah.
All right.
- Bye, bye. - Thank you.
- Yeah.
(knocking at door)
- You hungry?
- Yeah, I could eat.
- Please don't make me go tomorrow.
- You always said you wanted to make friends.
- How was the drive, how do you feel?
- Feel good.
We took the one up.
- We?
- I picked up one of Natalie's friends in LA
and drove up with her.
- Her? - Uh huh.
A female.
- Was she cute?
- Yeah, she's pretty cute.
She's nice.
- Nice?
Oh, shit.
Okay, tell me about her.
What you guys do?
Oh my God, you were in Big Sur together, fucking hell.
Where'd you guys get dinner?
Did you go to a sit down restaurant?
Was it on the coast?
Did you hold hands as the sun went down?
- Jesus you are insane.
- Tell me!
- We stopped in Monterey.
- Oh Ben, you have so much to learn.
- You wanna meet her?
- Is she coming over?
You know I just go that couch.
- Why do you even say things like that?
- What?
I don't want you two making squishing noises on my couch.
- Okay just stop, please.
- I'm just excited that you're getting back out there again.
You've been pretty much radioactive for three years.
- Thanks.
- I always thought that nurse had a thing for you.
- Yeah, you weren't too subtle about that.
- Okay, so when do I get to meet car girl?
- Probably tomorrow.
- What's tomorrow?
Oh fu...
- Happy my birthday.
- Happy birthday.
You know my sister, Jackie?
- Jackie, you look so good. - Happy, happy.
- You look so good. - Happy birthday.
- I'm obsessed with it.
Give me a hug.
(upbeat dance music) (indistinct conversations)
- Wait, how can you like Eddie Vedder and not Pearl Jam?
- I don't know.
I don't really like Pearl Jam.
I mean they're good but they're not as good
as just Eddie Vedder, you know?
- What has he even done?
- He did the "Into the Wild" soundtrack
and an album with a ukulele.
- Oh, so you're a pussy.
- Okay, where's Ben?
He would agree with me on this?
- And Sam.
Have you guys seen them?
- They're not in here.
- Jules.
Have you seen Ben or Sam?
(speaking French)
Oh my God, come on.
- Oh my God, I figured it out.
You sound like the narrator on SpongeBob.
You know, the welcome to Bikini Bottom.
(muffled dance music)
- Hey, hello.
- Hi.
- You guys are cute.
- Oh.
You know I can see your ass every time you bend
over in that dress.
- That's the point.
- Okay, bye.
- Sorry.
- Don't leave me in here with her.
- Oh wow, oh.
(laughing)
That was a whole thing.
- Yes it was.
- I like your sister.
- Yeah, she's, all right.
- You know what she told me?
- Oh god, what?
- Let's see, she said that used to pee like a dog
or that she caught you peeing like a dog.
- It was one time.
- Why?
- I don't know.
I was a kid and I saw the dog peeing in the backyard
and thought it looked fun and so I tried it.
- What do you mean try?
- So you're gonna make me spell this okay.
Okay, yeah, all right.
Well, I got on all fours
and I lifted a leg up and peed.
- Oh my god.
- All right.
- I have a sister.
- Yeah, what's her name?
- Kelly.
She just got married in April.
- Oh nice.
What was your role at the wedding?
- Maid of Honor.
- Right.
- It was hell, though,
I wanted to light her hair on fire half the time.
- She older or younger?
- Younger.
- Damn.
How does that make you feel?
Younger sister getting married before you.
You know that could get you killed in certain cultures.
- Shut up.
Being married right now sounds awful.
Kelly's 23.
I don't even know I want to be married at 33.
- You know that could get you killed in our culture.
- But why?
Relationships are insane.
Every relationship that I've ever had has failed
and if by some miracle one doesn't fail
then I'm gonna be with that person for the rest of my life.
I don't know which one sounds worse.
Like I get it when marriage had a purpose.
You know, when our life expectancy was lower
and men hunted and women gathered and all that.
But I don't know, I just seems like our society
has out paced our biology.
I mean, it be insane if I popped out five babies
by the time I was 21.
I would of made my mom cry.
- No, I get that.
I'm part of a generation
that will never be forced to go to war.
Right, I'm not gonna find myself
on some cloudy beach one day
and be told to run up a hill or die.
- You think that's wrong?
- I don't know.
If I say no is that fucked up?
- Yeah.
(laughing)
I'm kidding.
- What about you?
- What about me?
- You could go to war, too
What leaves you out of this?
- They don't want me.
I can barely do 10 pushups.
- Oh what happened to miss muscles from yesterday?
- I'm just saying I'm stronger than you.
- Yeah, you could barely get up those rocks.
- You think I couldn't?
You wanna kiss me again.
(muffled singing of "Happy Birthday")
Should we go inside?
- No.
- Come on, we should.
♪ Happy birthday dear Natalie ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
(cheering)
- Yeah!
- Speech. - Speech.
- Okay, okay.
Okay, thank you all for coming.
You all know how I do my birthday
and so if you're brave enough,
you're gonna stick it out until the very end
and you're all brave enough.
So I don't want to be the only one
who runs into that wall tonight.
(laughing)
But seriously, I look around this room
and I see my favorite people, people I love,
and some people who piss me off.
- [Man] Fuck you.
(laughing)
- I'm really glad you guys knew who I was talking about.
But seriously, I'm so happy you're all in my life
and I'm so happy you're here tonight.
So cheers. - Cheers.
- All right, get over to that table.
We're getting fucked up.
(cheering)
(lighthearted indie music)
♪ If you're lost ♪
♪ And feeling gloomy ♪
♪ We can cuddle up ♪
♪ And listen to me ♪
♪ You're gonna be okay ♪
♪ Soon ♪
♪ If you've got the Monday blues ♪
♪ If there's water in your shoes ♪
♪ You're gonna be okay soon ♪
♪ So cheer up ♪
♪ The world is spinning ♪
♪ People that you love are living ♪
♪ You can light up the room ♪
(lighthearted kazoo music)
♪ Cheer up ♪
♪ The world is spinning ♪
♪ People that you love are living ♪
♪ You can light up the room ♪
♪ Cheer up ♪
♪ Make a smoothie ♪
♪ Take a bath or watch a movie ♪
♪ You're gonna be okay soon ♪
(indistinct conversations)
- Sounds good.
- Dancing.
I remember dancing.
- Well, you danced. - That's all you remember?
'Cause there was a lot more
than dancing we did. - I remember tequila.
- Yeah and Jell-O shots.
- Too many Jell-O shots.
- [Sam] That you tried to make more of
once you were completely inebriated.
- Oh my god, that's the shit in the sink this morning.
- [Sam] That's the shit in the sink this morning.
- Make so much sense now.
- Yeah, that was it.
- [Sam] Well congrats.
You uncovered the mystery.
- What do you guys think of my hangover cure spot?
- I love it, it's cute. - It's great.
- I used to work right down the street from here.
- Still work right down the street from everywhere.
- Hey, I gotta get paid.
- You gotta not get fired.
- I got fired one time.
- Whoa, how were you fired?
- Fraternizing with the customers.
- Yeah, with you.
So really it's your fault and I wasn't fired,
they just stopped giving me shifts.
- Okay so how fraternized were you?
- Fratner.
- But it worked out.
I mean I was out of a job and you were free
and I think that's the weekend
we spent in San Diego at your cousin's place.
- Yeah, it's all part of your evil plan
to get me to like you.
- I think you always liked me.
We can ask your old boss if you liked me.
- I didn't like you, we had chemistry.
I liked you later.
- When did you like me?
- [Natalie] When did you like me?
- I always liked you.
- No, you didn't.
- Yeah.
I mean that was the least of my feelings.
- Oh boy. - Stop.
My skins gonna crawl off.
Stop.
- We're making things awkward?
- I'm not looking, I'm not looking.
- Okay, okay, okay.
Well, if we're gonna make this awkward
let's make this awkward.
Ben, who likes who more?
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. - I'm sorry.
- Do you like Sam more does Sam like you more?
Like where are we at here?
- You mean like do I like--
- Don't, don't answer.
Just don't answer it.
Just don't.
- There is something here though, right?
Oh man, you guys gotta take words less seriously.
I mean getting to know people,
like finding things about people, that's hard enough.
You guys are here delicately sweeping away
but you gotta just rip that shit out of the ground.
You know, time's wasting.
What are you waiting for?
- I mean between us there's something fun.
But, I. - But but but.
Well then what is it, Sam?
Why won't you guys just say it?
- Kevin we all know that your mom still dresses you.
Just 'cause we don't say it doesn't mean it's not true.
(laughing)
- [Sam] Slow clap.
- You son of a bitch.
- I'm sorry, I'm not laughing.
- What did you say?
- I'm on your team.
- What did you say?
- [Sam] I'm proud of you for that.
- [Ben] Yeah, thank you.
Thank you.
Now we can move on.
- [Sam] Now we can move on.
(soft music) (indistinct conversations)
- Alrighty.
We gotta go meet my parents.
Gotta do it.
I love you. - Love you.
- See you guys later.
Are you gonna be okay?
Of course you are.
Let's go.
- Bye.
- Bye bye.
- See ya, Kev.
- See ya.
- I hate them.
They're cute and I hate them.
- How you feeling?
- Good.
Food helped.
- Yes, it did.
You wanna do something?
- Sure, like what?
- [Ben] Let's drive across the Golden Gate bridge.
- [Sam] Really?
- [Ben] Yeah.
- [Sam] It's all traffic.
- [Ben] Okay, I dragged your ass
all the way up the one yesterday
and I think it's only fair that we cross the finish line.
The Golden Gate is pretty much the most iconic part
of the entire PCH and we're just not gonna do it?
I mean it's right there.
- Okay.
- All right.
- [Sam] Back in high school,
Natalie and I used to bring our boyfriends up here.
- Oh.
- Natalie boyfriend had the only truck
in the entire city, I swear.
We would all cram into his flat bed
and listen to country music and play stupid games
like truth or dare.
Sometimes we'd steal some beer from Natalie's parents.
It was very rebellious time.
- Oh yeah.
This you and Victor?
- Who?
Victor Flores? - Yeah.
- No.
I had Michael.
- Oh, Michael.
Yeah he sounds ugly.
You guys still talk?
- No.
But if I messaged him we'd catch up no problem.
- So this is kinda like sacred ground for you up here.
- Yeah.
Right there, it's where I smoked weed
for the first time in my life.
- Right there?
There?
- Yes.
- Can we sit there?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, sure.
(laughing)
Viola.
- Wow.
So what, you're just sitting here
and someone just hands you a joint?
- Yeah, totally.
Except we were so uncool.
It wasn't like, hey do you want to fit in,
it was it, is this how you do it?
- Come on.
There's no way you were uncool.
You are objectively and scientifically
decently attractive.
- Well, we thought we were cool.
Let's just put it that way.
- So which one of you lost your virginity up here?
Oh come on.
One of you guys must have.
Look at this spot.
It's like embarrassing how romantic it is.
If I was Michael and I was sitting next to you,
it be hard to be thinking about anything else.
If I was Michael, of course.
- Well, you're not wrong.
- About what, about fucking up here?
Virginity?
No.
Natalie.
Wait you?
Where?
He...
Here?
On the dirty ass stairs?
- Yeah.
- What?
You and Michael right here?
- Stop.
- I can't even be here with you.
I can't be sitting there.
- Shut up. - This is wrong.
- Stop.
- This is like, this is like going to a stranger's funeral.
- Sit down.
Jesus.
- It's forever unclean. - Shut up.
- I can smell it.
- Shut up.
(soft reflective music)
- [Ben] So how'd it start?
- [Sam] So I don't get it, is that the one or the 101?
- [Ben] It's both.
- So they just split off and just one keeps going?
- They split off somewhere up there.
We can check if you want.
- No.
Fuck Google.
We'll just drive, we'll find it.
Do you think that we have no culture?
- [Ben] You and me or just you?
- [Sam] Ha ha.
No us, Americans.
Do you remember that guy at the party,
the French guy, Emma's friend?
He was saying that he loves America
because we have no culture.
- [Ben] We definitely have culture.
You should ask the guy if he's ever seen
a movie or listened to music.
- I think we were listening to all the wrong things
to make that argument.
- [Ben] What you say to him?
- I told him we make better wine than them.
- Oh, those are fighting words right there.
- I know, he got so mad.
It was great.
(cursing in French)
He said, we have better wine than you.
In the whole world, it's the best.
- That was you, that was your French accent?
- Yes, thank you. - French accent.
- I know.
(speaking mock French)
Yes.
- That's better.
- [Sam] That literally is what I said.
- Say it again.
Let me hear it. (mock French)
That's not quite what I'm saying.
But. - Well, that's how he said it.
I don't know if you think you're the expert.
- I mean he's French, I don't think he said it
like what you said.
And look, they've got their wine, okay,
and they've got their cheese and their rusty old tower
but if we take away their wine,
then what do they got?
They just got a bunch of cheese and a tower, sober.
- Yeah. - It's almost un-American.
- It felt rude. - Yeah, damn right.
- Like, no culture?
What isn't culture?
Culture is history and places and cities and food.
It's like saying we have no personality.
That's what it felt like when he said it.
I don't know, they have the Eiffel Tower
we have the Statue of Liberty.
They have wine, we have wine.
They have cheese, we have pizza.
- Okay but do you know how the Statue of Liberty came to be?
- [Sam] No, how?
- The French gave it to us.
- Oh come on.
You know what else they gave us?
- What.
- Louisiana.
And if they had just kept that to themselves
then they could have said that they invented Forest Gump
and also Jazz.
- It could be argued that classical French brass
did inspire Jazz.
- Can you?
- Think you about it, it makes sense.
Like, okay the northeast is New England, right,
and it's pretty English.
The southwest is Spanish.
Louisiana is French.
We all have what we got.
You and me are just a sad followup
to another lost generation.
- Who said that, lost generation?
- Some old lady used to describe people like
Hemingway, Fitzgerald, Picasso.
Guys who survived WWI
but weren't particularly happy about it.
- See, there's more classic American things.
For Whom the Bell Tolls.
The Great Gatsby.
WWI.
- Yeah, except for the fact that I think she met
them all while they were expats living in Paris, France.
- No. - Fitzgerald even wrote
The Great Gatsby, I'm pretty sure,
while he was in Paris.
- Now you're just making shit up, stop.
- Maybe that guy was right, though.
Are we French?
Are we French right now?
- I'm feeling really French right now.
There's a lot happening.
- They drive on the right side of the road.
We drive on the right side of the road.
We didn't have to do that.
- Wait, why do we wear shoes on our feet?
- Personally, I saw a French guy do it once
so I took 'em off my hands,
tried it the French way, total game changer.
- You know that every menu in the whole McDonald's world
has the French on it?
- George Washington, he didn't speak English.
- I'm just imaging that painting
where he's crossing The Delaware
all sneaky in the middle of the night
and no one in the whole boat
can understand a word he's saying
- God damn it, George, what the fuck are we doing?
There's fucking icebergs out here.
(mock French accent) It's George.
(laughing)
(soft reflective guitar music)
- Wow.
Well they don't got this, my friend.
(soft reflective music)
What does this make you think of?
- How lucky we are in this life.
And a slight fear of getting pooped on.
What about you?
- My mom and dad took us out here when we moved.
Just me and my sister.
I think they wanted to show us how awesome
the West Coast was gonna be.
But I hated it.
First day, I ran out into the woods and got super lost.
I just remember being really afraid of every little sound.
Eventually, I got to this river
and I just took my shoes off and I cried,
like I really had a moment.
But when I looked up, in front of the redwoods,
I saw these three deer.
It was a mom and her two babies.
She was just staring at me.
Really staring at me.
Her ears and everything just completely facing me.
I thought they were gonna cross.
- Did they?
- No.
It's the thought that counts.
- Almost time.
Don't touch the pot.
- The one that's in the fire?
- That's the one.
- [Sam] Hurry up, I'm hungry.
- Hey, can I tell you something?
I don't think I'll ever forget today.
- I'm gonna set up some blankets before it gets dark.
But, I'm having a good time, too.
Ben.
- Yeah?
- I need help.
♪ There's a ship ♪
♪ That sails by my window ♪
♪ There's a ship ♪
♪ Sails all night ♪
♪ There's a world ♪
♪ Under it ♪
♪ I think I see it ♪
♪ Sailing ♪ (Ben shouting)
- That's, that's. - Wanna go get him?
- [Ben] No.
You just want to pick up a hitchhiker?
♪ I think I see it. ♪
- [Sam] He's going exactly where we're going.
♪ While it's crashing me by ♪
He's going to where we're going.
- [Ben] You just wanna pick up this guy?
- [Sam] Yeah, he's singing.
- [Ben] Look at him.
- [Sam] I like him.
♪ Crashing me ♪ - Let's do it.
We're not us, though.
- [Sam] What do you mean we're not us?
- [Ben] We're, just, we're not us.
Just go with it.
- Hey, Oregon.
- Y'all heading to Oregon?
- Hell yeah.
You need a ride?
- Heck yeah.
- You can put your stuff back there.
I'm Cider.
That right there is Chardonnay.
- Well Cider, Chardonnay.
I'm Shine.
- All right.
- [Ben] So Shine, what you up to?
- Oh I'm just traveling around a bit, I guess.
Trying to see as much of the world
as I can get my hands on.
What about you fine, folks?
- We're treasure hunters.
- Treasure hunters?
What kind of treasure you talking about?
- Well, Shine, since it aint likely
I'm ever gonna see you again.
We'll tell ya.
We're looking for Bigfoot.
- Big...
Get out.
You serious?
You think he's out there?
- Oh we know he's out there.
Tell him, Cider.
- [Ben] He's out there.
I seen him.
- You're telling me that you've seen Bigfoot?
- [Ben] Yes.
- Where?
- Oh that, I can't say.
- My goodness, y'all crazy.
You gotta be the second looniest lovebirds
to ever pick me up, I swear.
You gotta let me come with you.
- [Ben] You wanna come with?
- Heck yeah.
You saying you trying to find Bigfoot.
How can I say no to that?
- All right, slow down, hotshot.
We don't even know if we're ready.
- All right well, ask away, Chardonnay.
- He's not ready.
- Oh come on, my momma was a bloodhound
and my daddy was a hawk.
I can find anything
- [Ben] Okay.
- You got any talents?
- Talents, sure I got a few of those.
I can play the guitar pretty decent
and this here harmonica.
(playing harmonica)
- Oh, very nice.
You do anything else?
- I mean there is this one thing
I've been doing since I was a kid, I think.
It's a bit strange and seeing as y'all fancy
towards the supernatural,
I think maybe we can give it a shot.
- [Ben] Okay, what is it?
- I know two things about everybody.
Anybody in the whole world
and I've known these two things all my life.
All's I'm missing is who they belong to.
- All right, do Cider.
- What?
No, no.
Do Chardonnay first.
- Come on, it will be fun.
- No, Cider, I don't do this unless you want it.
- Do it.
Do it.
- All right, well, first.
Congratulations on your most recent success.
We're all very proud of you.
And second, you're a good cook.
- Good cook?
We had instant noodle for dinner last night.
- Okay, Chardonnay.
Let's see what the man has to say about you.
- You presume to know anything about me
and I'll kick you straight out of this car.
- Okay, ma'am.
So it be's.
- What recent success?
- Maybe the simple fact that you're sitting
in my passenger seat.
- Give me a break.
- Cider and Chardonnay.
Y'all sound like a cocktail.
- [Ben] What would you call it?
- That's not for me to decide.
I'm only drinking it.
(soft harmonic music)
(upbeat honky tonk music)
Cider.
- Yeah?
- What's the best day that you've had on this Earth?
- Damn, I don't know.
- That's a good thing.
It means that you've had many good days.
But you still gotta choose.
So, what is it?
- All right, two years ago,
I went to visit my sister in Germany
and we decided to go into town one day for lunch.
We stopped at this beautiful restaurant
in the middle of this old square.
One of those with a fountain in the middle
and a church at one end.
It was already a perfect day
but then out of nowhere, there's this loud trumpet.
(mimics trumpet blowing)
It sounded like it was right in my ear
but it was coming from the church.
Coming from this guy
that looked like he jumped straight out of the Renaissance.
And as he's emptying his lungs into this thing,
the guy, trumpet guy, he bows his head
and he turns towards the double doors, they open.
There's this old lady standing there.
- Who was?
- The Queen of England.
- What?
- Yeah.
(laughing)
- That's nuts. - Yeah.
- You gotta be kidding me, man.
- She just like stood there
and waved for two minutes and went back inside.
- Wait, that's wild.
- Yeah, felt like a cuckoo clock.
- [Shine] That's what I'm talking about, man.
- Well, what about you, Shine?
You have a crazy life.
What's your best day?
- That's easy, it's today.
- No, no, no, no.
You're not coping out like that.
- Why not?
I believe it.
Today is the only day that is.
Okay, today is the day that I would have forever.
For it is the anchor of all other days.
And plus, y'all are pretty cool.
- Bullshit.
- All right, we'll let him have it
but we get to ask you one more question.
- Ask away.
- Have you ever been in love?
- Oh my God.
I thought we were only asking easy questions, Chardonnay.
Yeah, I have.
- [Sam] Well, are you in love?
- Yeah.
- When was the last time you saw her or him?
- Her.
It was, it was September, last fall.
- [Ben] What's her name?
Say it out loud. - Yeah, say it out loud.
- Yeah, say it.
Come on. - Say it.
Say it.
- All right, her name's Holly.
- Holly. - Holly.
Okay you happy?
All right, whatever.
- So what happened?
Why is there no Shine cocktail in the backseat?
- [Sam] Where is she now?
- That's the best part.
No one even knows.
She lives on a ship.
This old rusted out thing
and I did too, for awhile.
In the North Atlantic, saving the whales
and protecting the environment
and all that cool stuff.
And after awhile, I wanted to leave
but she didn't, she wanted to stay.
- Does she still love you?
- Who knows, man.
She's all passion.
I swear, some of the things that came out of her mouth
changed my life.
See, that's why I like you guys.
Y'all get me.
We're too young, man.
We're all too young for love.
But that doesn't stop us from doing it.
I mean, what's love anyways
except for the lost parts of ourselves, right?
We have no dependents, no inheritance,
nothing to split, nothing to lose.
Buying the love for the love, man.
It's the best day of my life.
I swear.
Y'all my summer cocktail.
- A Shiner.
- Oh. - Shiner.
- Cider and Chardonnay.
A Shiner.
- That sounds mighty fine to me.
(somber harmonica music)
- [Ben] So what grocery store you go to?
You ever go to Santa Fe?
- [Sam] Sometimes.
But I mostly go to the Korean market on Chavez.
- Wait, you, too?
You ever have one of those donuts
that they have behind the checkout?
- Pam pies?
All the time.
I can't believe you even know about that.
- That's the only reason why I go there.
- How have we never met?
- Maybe we have.
- Makes me sad.
- Hey, cocktail.
I made some friends down at the beach,
they want to help us out with dinner.
What y'all think?
- We're following you, man.
- Go on, get your asses out.
Let's go.
- There's a cute dog, that dog.
- [Shine] Hey Judy, Karl.
I found 'em.
- Oh, hey.
Are these the sweethearts?
Yes they are, I can tell.
I'm a master at love.
Just ask Karl.
(laughing)
So, you want to catch some dinner?
- Sure. - Yeah, sure.
- You can catch us some dinner, too, while you're at it.
Come on, you'll love it.
Come on.
- Okay.
- You don't mind getting dirty, I can tell.
That's the sign of a real woman right there.
A real woman aint afraid to roll up her sleeves.
You get to be my age and all you got left are T-shirts, so.
(laughing)
So, this is how you catch the clam.
You take this here tube
and you shove it down into the sand.
Careful not to crush any.
Now, you got to put your thumb over the hole, like this,
then when you lift up, all the sand'll come falling out.
(cheering)
See, and then you just look for the little wiggly tongues.
It's, you know, (goofy warbling).
Hey, Karl, you gonna do me like that later?
(goofy warbling)
- Damn, Judy.
- God.
(laughing)
- Well, then you, it's easy.
You just, you pick 'em up, throw 'em in the bottle.
It's easy.
- [Sam] Wow, round of applause.
- Well thank you, sweethearts.
Now, see how many you can catch
while I go drink a beer with my man
and we'll have ourselves a little fry tonight, huh?
Okay, there you go.
- Thank you. - Sounds good.
- Come on.
- All right.
- [Judy] Hey, Karl, you got me a cold one?
Oh, you're a good man.
(soft reflective indie music)
♪ Take me down to the ocean ♪
♪ Let me into the sea ♪
♪ 'Cause I'm drowning in silence ♪
♪ From the things we don't speak ♪
- The thumb, the thumb. - Yeah, come on.
Jump on it.
♪ Though you fade without pain ♪
♪ Like a portrait I once knew ♪
♪ And once was ♪
- What are we betting? - I don't know
but I'm gonna win.
♪ Of me ♪
- All right, let's see it.
♪ Fall asleep ♪
♪ Wait till I dream ♪
♪ Maybe then ♪
- Are we gonna starve tonight because of me?
- I'm more worried that they're gonna be upset with us.
♪ That we weren't meant to be ♪
♪ You and me ♪
Judy's gonna kick my ass.
This is Judy's!
(reflective indie music)
I don't know what happened.
It just broke.
I can get you a new one.
I did what you told me to do with it.
♪ With our hearts on our sleeves ♪
♪ I can tell you a story ♪
♪ If you just let me know ♪
♪ What kind of an ending ♪
♪ And the pacing how slow ♪
♪ We could fall asleep ♪
♪ Making a dream ♪
♪ Maybe then ♪
♪ I wouldn't conceive ♪
♪ How we were ♪
♪ Meant to be ♪
♪ You and me ♪
(cheering)
- [Ben] So what did you do?
- Oh man, I put it in my travel sack.
I rode up straight to my front door,
in the middle of the night.
It was no easy task.
Let me tell you.
- This is what I'm dealing with.
A fool who thinks the sky is falling down.
- I'm telling you, honey,
that thing almost tore my face right off.
- Okay, so you, two.
Picked this guy up off the side of the street.
- Yup.
- Yeah.
- Were you hitchhiking?
- Yes, ma'am.
Not my last time, either.
- And how did you know he wouldn't just kill you?
- Oh he still might, we're not entirely sure yet.
(laughing)
- Were you lost?
- No, I had a pretty good idea about where I was.
- He had a sign with him
and it just said Oregon on it.
- Well, at least he had a sign.
You know, some people just stand out there
with their thumb out.
Like "The Twilight Zone" and I'm the main character.
- So is that you two right now?
Twilight Zone?
- Two lovers pull off the side of the highway
where a solemn drifter awaits them.
On a tablet is etched his only commandment, Oregon.
But this is a false promise
for their true destination is a place without borders.
Without logic.
Like an upside arrow that points these travelers
down a road, a road they did not choose.
That road is.
- [All] The Twilight Zone.
(humming Twilight Zone theme)
(laughing)
- I know it's "The Twilight Zone"
but that sounds like so much fun.
- Well if they're in the twilight zone
then so are we.
- Right on.
- May we never leave.
- Cheers to that.
Cheers to that.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Hey.
- Excuse me, darling, thank you.
So this is me from back in the day.
They used to call my Judy Booty.
Remember when they called me Judy Booty, Karl?
- Judy you're hot.
And Karl not bad.
(laughing)
- I was Miss Vegas 1971.
Back when that town had some class.
Everybody knew me.
I used to serve drinks to Frank and the boys
after they'd finish a show at The Sands.
Oh he had the most wonderful smile.
And he always made sure I had enough
for a bottle or two.
- Who is Frank?
- Who's Frank?
It's Frank.
These kids come in here saying
they don't know Frank no more.
Oh lord.
Oh save me.
♪ Fly me to the moon ♪
♪ Let me ♪
You know how much I hate that song.
- Frank Sinatra?
- You know any other Franks?
There was Frank and Sammy and Dean. Ooh.
Dean.
One time Dean asked me to go with him to Chicago
and I told him, your room's a lot closer.
- Judy! (all laughing)
- See, Karl gets me, he loves me.
All these horrible stories, he loves me anyway.
But you would of done the same thing.
- Says who?
- You know you would of.
- Oh, I would.
- Oh those panties would be flying off of you.
They would go flying.
(laughing)
I love you, Karl. - Am I dreaming right now?
- See, he gets me.
That's why we've lasted so long.
Right, sugar?
(soft reflective music)
- [Sam] I think my mom would of liked you.
- If she's responsible for this,
I think I would of liked her, too.
- Ben.
- Yeah?
- I don't want to go home.
- Well, you're in luck.
'Cause we're going far away from there.
- You've really done a number on that boy.
He's handsome.
- He has his moments.
- That's right.
They must always think they can't do better than us.
- No one can do better than you, Judy.
- Oh, girl.
Well that's very sweet of you to say.
But between you and me.
I've done so much cocaine in my life
they'd let me met Pablo Escobar.
- Geeze.
- Truth is.
If I was Karl, I'd of left my ass in Varadero.
Look at our boys.
If you're gonna leave him, do it now.
- Across that bridge is Washington.
- It's so green.
- Can you get my sunglasses out of there?
- Oh my God.
This has been here the whole time?
Hey, Cocktail.
I don't know what you expected...
- [Shine Voiceover] When you pulled over for me
back in California
but I hope that I was able to brighten your journey,
like you have for mine.
I don't know where you're heading
or how many miles you've come
but as long as this cocktail is still shaking,
the world'll keep spinning true.
We'll see each other again someday.
(laughing)
Until then. - Bye, lovebirds!
- [Shine Voiceover] Look for me in the beach foam
on your feet.
Between the branches of the evergreen.
The flat stones lying in the creek.
I'll play you a song.
Love, Shine.
(reflective harmonic music)
- [Sam] I saw you talking to Karl for a bit.
- Yeah, I didn't think I'd ever hear two words
from the guy but this morning we just started chatting.
- What he say?
- He said a lot of things.
You asking?
- Kinda.
- Well he talked mostly about him and Judy.
About how they were married and then split
and then married again.
First marriage was a couple years.
This one over two decades.
Talked about you for a bit, too.
- Me?
- Mostly good things.
Mostly.
- You're evil.
Would you have their life?
- [Ben] Oh, in a second.
What about you?
- [Sam] Maybe, it doesn't seem so bad.
- [Ben] Which part?
- The house, the quiet.
Clams, or lack thereof.
They looked happy.
- You think it's possible to have that kind
of happiness alone, without someone else?
- I don't really think we know what that love is.
I mean, Shine was right when he said
that our kind of love is simple.
Imagine that after you spend so much time with someone
love becomes less of a feeling
and more of just an identity.
I mean, it's not uncommon for old couples
to die within months of each other.
It's like, at a certain point,
your self preservation just encompasses things
that aren't yourself.
- Imagine giving that up.
It be like selling your soul
just to meet the devil.
- It's not that bad.
- Well maybe not that dramatic.
- Have you ever felt that?
Like your identity was apart of someone else's?
- At times, maybe, but just in those moments.
You know?
Now, that seems crazy.
- It is crazy.
Like committing your entire life to someone,
having someone commit their entire life to you.
It's almost unethical.
- So you've at least been close?
That poor boy.
- I don't know, I just feel
like I'm fooling myself, sometimes.
Like I have to act a certain way
because I have this responsibly to rebel.
All the expectations that are put on us.
Like shaving everything underneath our eyebrows.
Ordering fruity drinks at the bars
and getting married and having kids.
It's irrational but I feel like if I do,
I'm being a bad feminist.
And I don't want to get married.
That's the truth of it.
But, I don't know, if I did, it be like, boom,
I'm Judy and Karl and everything's perfect
and even though everything's perfect,
I'm a fraud deep down.
I don't know.
- You're allowed to want what you want.
Even if you try to rebel against one social construct,
you're just subscribing to another.
You just gotta do you, man.
- My mom always used to say that.
"Just do you, girl."
- [Ben] I said man.
- I know.
You're lucky I like you.
Just don't expect to get married.
- Hey, what happened with your mom?
You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.
- She got sick.
It was really tough for her and everyone.
I don't know.
At the end, I could just see it fading away
and the last couple months, she was just really weak.
- I'm sorry, Sam.
- I'm okay.
I just, I don't really know how to be, yet.
Cancer's pretty annoying.
- Tell me about it.
Yeah.
It's not easy.
- You look outside, what do you see?
♪ I see trees of green. ♪
♪ Red roses, too ♪
♪ I see them bloom ♪
♪ For me and you ♪
♪ And I think to myself ♪
♪ What a wonderful world ♪
- That was my parent's favorite.
- Yeah, you told me.
- Anytime I heard that song,
I knew they were downstairs with a bottle of wine dancing.
My dad would do that thing where he'd dip her.
She'd touch his cheek.
And I knew if that happened,
I had five seconds to run upstairs
because they were done dancing.
- Hey, Sam.
- Yeah?
- I like your moves.
(laughing)
- Are you?
Stop laughing.
- Don't break my, bag, too.
- I'm gonna break your bag.
- Hey.
- Oh shit.
- Fucker.
I'm gonna fuck you up.
(soft reflective music)
Ben.
(soft reflective music)
I was wondering where you went.
- Yup, just wanted to get some fresh air.
It's really nice out.
- Yeah, it is.
- You wanna join me?
- Okay.
Getting a little tipsy.
- Yeah.
The closer you are to Natalie,
the more you're at risk of Jell-O shots.
- I know.
She already made me take four with her.
- Oh yeah, after the first two
I got as far away from her as possible.
- You left me?
- I had no choice.
- How could you do that?
I thought you liked me.
- I like you.
I have a fifth grade crush on you,
it doesn't mean I'll do four Jell-O shots.
- Fifth grade crush on me?
- Yeah.
It's sort of a bad example.
- Why?
- I was terrified of my fifth grade crush.
- And me?
- Terrified of you, too.
(swelling reflective music)
Chardonnay.
- What?
- Just get over here.
[Mock British voice] We stand at the edge of the map.
- Jesus.
- Beyond this point lies an unexplored wilderness.
An uncharted void.
And they're counting on us, Chardonnay,
to erase the compass rose and fill it
with land.
- It's Canada.
- Okay, well if you say it like that.
- You make it sound like it's the afterlife.
- If I died and went to Canada,
I'd consider myself lucky.
- What if you died and went to Canada
and I ended up in Mongolia?
- Well, then I'd start walking.
Or drive, whatever they got.
I'm not trying to work that hard.
- Imagine we're the first people here
and we had to draw the map.
We started from where we started,
and we took notes all the way up the coast.
Maybe there's already a map but it's old
and drawn from a ship way out there.
The ship never stops at night,
and so the people never sleep
and in the morning they have to draw in all the dark parts
and then the further up north we get,
the more different the maps look
and we have to fill in coastlines
and mountains and rivers and change history.
How would that make you feel?
- Frustrated, probably.
I'd assume I was wrong.
- Yeah.
Yeah, assuming your wrong for thousands of miles
for what feels like years
and then you get here and you have two maps
and you wonder if they were even in the same place at all.
- Maybe they're not.
You really don't want to go home, do you?
Why not?
- Because I know what happens when we go home.
- What happens?
You know, I never asked you to be my girlfriend or anything.
I didn't say, let's go home and get married.
- I know.
- What then?
- Back there's the real world, you know,
that's our lives.
- So what, in the real world this,
this could never be a thing?
- But this isn't me, this is you.
This is you.
This is what you're all about.
You have the car and all the stuff, just ready to go.
Out here you can be yourself.
But not me.
Out here I can be someone else.
I can pretend.
- I don't believe that, though.
I don't believe that this is just the stage
for some giant performance.
This was the truth.
Look, this thing that we found out here,
this place didn't give it to us.
- Maybe I just don't want you to be upset when that changes.
(swelling reflective music)
- There's a ferry that leaves at nine tomorrow morning
and a later one.
- Maybe, what are the times?
- [Ben] It's every hour until four.
- Okay.
- Ten o'clock?
- Okay.
- Okay, I'm booking the tickets.
- Wait, maybe not yet.
- We should just book 'em now
and then if we're late, we can always change 'em.
- Can we just get them when we get there?
- [Ben] I'm right here, I can just do it.
- Can you just wait?
- Okay.
- What if tomorrow you just drop me off at the ferry
and I went and you didn't?
- That's a bad plan.
- I know.
- Okay, good.
'Cause I'm coming.
- I just don't want to ruin this.
- You must really think you got me hooked.
Relax, okay.
In the morning with some time,
everything will be okay.
- Yeah but it's not just the morning,
it's the next day and the next day and the next day
and God knows how much longer after that.
Like what if I want to spend another month out here?
- Then let's spend another month.
Fuck it, that will be fun.
- I know you, Ben.
I know we haven't been together that long
but I know you're not gonna want to do that.
- You don't know shit about me.
Okay you don't even know half the stuff I haven't told you.
- Okay then how do you think this next month is gonna go?
- We get on the ferry, together.
And then we get off and we get back in the car
and keep driving.
Maybe check out Vancouver.
I don't know just get into a bunch of trouble
like we've been doing.
- And we never bring this up again?
- No.
You said what you needed to say and I heard you.
It's done.
I'm fine.
- Sure.
- [Ben] You'd really rather just end it, right here?
- Here's how I see the next month going.
We get on the ferry, together.
We get off, we get in the car.
Then I completely forget about this conversation
and I keep feeding this fucking time bomb
and then we keep exploring and living
and fucking and drinking
and then I'll tell you that I love you.
Because I'll love you.
But it's not a fair love
it's like the kind of love
that exists in the absence of everything that's gone.
Everything that we left behind.
And I did leave things behind.
Things I don't want to go back to.
So I forgot about them
and I replaced them with these places
and these moments and these days with you.
But.
You're not gonna forget like that.
While I'm busing exercising these delusions
you're gonna remember tonight
and you're gonna think,
maybe, maybe it's different now.
And maybe you won't even bring it up,
maybe something else will bring it up
but it will be there again
and then all of a sudden I become everything that I hate
and then all these amazing things.
Everything we've done together.
They'll become nothing.
- I think you're being dramatic.
- [Sam] I think you're being condescending.
- I'm being condescending?
You're the one that's acting like this $40 ferry ticket
is a fucking a diamond ring.
- I was out there today, I saw your face.
- God, what is your problem?
You can't even see that everything you want me to do
is just a way for you to put it all on me.
'Cause if I do it, then you don't have to
and then you can get mad at something other than yourself
and you can stay in this selfish, safe place
while I do all the heavy lifting.
- Don't fucking lecture me.
Especially about myself.
You wouldn't last one day in my brain.
- No, I probably wouldn't.
- No, you would be a pathetic curled up ball
on the floor and you'd cry forever.
- Oh yeah?
'Cause your life is so hard.
Is it, Sam?
No one understands you.
No, the only person that knows tragedy
in this world is you.
Because the only tragic things that happened
happened to you.
Yeah, your mom died.
But you're not the only person going through shit.
- You know what the truth is?
Truth is I don't want to be with you.
I'm not afraid that you're gonna abandon me
because that would be a fucking gift.
I'm afraid you're never gonna leave.
- Fear no further.
We go to the same grocery store.
What do if I see you buying carrots?
- I don't like carrots.
- I'm not just gonna walk right by.
- Then say hi.
- Hi, Sam.
How's it going?
You wanna walk home together?
God, of all the ways to die.
Kill me with small talk.
You let it get too far.
- I couldn't help it.
(somber reflective music)
Is your car unlocked?
- Yeah.
- Hey.
- Where'd you get that?
- I stole it.
- Really?
- No, I bought it at the store yesterday.
At least it's not Jell-O shots.
- At least.
- Come on, we need this.
I need this if we're gonna get through the night.
I think there's plenty for a couple of Shiners.
- Don't do that.
- You can at least call me Chardonnay one more time.
Made me sound so Southern.
Chardonnay.
- It made you sound like a porn star.
Not front page porn star, either.
Maybe like page three porn star.
- Like Tori Black.
You thought that flew right over my head, didn't you?
- Hey, Tori Black is front page, top five.
- Come on.
It's not gonna drink itself.
(soft reflective music)
- [Ben] Hey, little girl.
- Fuck.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
- I just came to help out this time.
- Help what?
- Well at first I thought you were sneaking out
every morning to bury your victim.
- I'm not that entertaining.
I'll let you be my first.
- I doubt I'm your first.
So what is it this time?
Was that hers?
It's really pretty.
- May as well say something.
- Okay.
Hi, Mrs. Muller.
I'm here with Sam.
She said she wanted to be at the seance thing
but truth be told, I've abducted her
and she's been my prisoner ever since.
She said one time that you'd like me.
I hope so.
'Cause I could use a little help.
She's gotten in there.
She's stolen all the jewels.
All the money.
Maybe some vital organs.
I blame you.
Because the things that she does
that stir me up are just from her.
Just what she's made of.
Same things you're made of.
We're proud of you.
And we miss you.
- That was okay.
- I like the prisoner part.
Chardonnay.
(twigs snapping)
Shit.
- What the fuck was that?
Did you see something?
- No.
It was something heavy, I think.
- Ben.
- No way.
[Sam] ♪ This one goes out to all my pretty mommas ♪
♪ Well since my baby left ♪
♪ I found a new place to dwell ♪
♪ Down at the end of the lonely street ♪
♪ At the Heartbreak Hotel ♪
♪ I get so lonely baby ♪
♪ So lonely I could die ♪
- You jerk.
- For a second there, you really looked like Elvis.
- I am Elvis.
- So you really gonna leave me at the dock, alone?
♪ So lonely I could die ♪
- Yeah, you deserve it you whiny little bitch.
- Come on, let's keep driving.
- Where would we go?
- All over, wherever.
- We could explore Seattle, the fish market.
- Or Canada.
- Space Needle.
- Vancouver.
- We don't have passports.
- They don't give a shit.
- What about the edibles?
- We'll eat them all.
- We'd die
- Well let's die.
I' die one more time
if it meant I could get back in that car with you.
Give me a chance.
I don't want to go home.
Take me far away from here.
Take me.
(somber piano music)
(soft reflective music)