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GEMMA: My next guest on the couch
is music industry guru, kingpin,
and former head of Creation Records.
He's political, occasionally controversial,
and he's a great friend.
He is, of course, Mr. Alan McGee.
[ Rock music playing ]
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ Dealers keep a-dealin' ♪
♪ Thieves keep a-thievin' ♪
♪ Whores keep a-whorin' ♪
♪ Junkies keep scorin' ♪
♪ Trade is on the meat rack ♪
♪ Strip joints full of hunchbacks ♪
♪ Bitches keep a-bitchin' ♪
♪ Clap just keeps a-itchin' ♪
♪ Ain't no use in prayin' ♪
♪ That's the way it's stayin', baby ♪
♪ Johnny ain't so crazy ♪
♪ He's always got a line for the ladies ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Get your rocks off ♪
♪ Get your rocks off, honey ♪
♪ Shake 'em now-now ♪
♪ Get 'em off downtown ♪
♪ Get your rocks off ♪
♪ Get your rocks off, honey ♪
♪ Shake 'em now, now ♪
♪ Get 'em off downtown ♪
♪ Creeps keep a-crawlin' ♪
♪ Drunks keep a-fallin' ♪
♪ Teasers keep a-teasin' ♪
♪ Holy joes are preachin' ♪
♪ Cops keep a-bustin' ♪
♪ Hustlers keep a-hustlin' ♪
♪ Death keeps a-knockin' ♪
♪ Souls are up for auction ♪
♪ Ain't no use in prayin' ♪
♪ That's the way it's stayin', baby ♪
♪ Johnny ain't so crazy ♪
♪ He's always got a line for the.. ♪
[ Music distorts ]
-[ Bell rings ] -ALAN: Drowning in money.
Don't need to be a shrink to work that one out.
A wee ginger cunt from Glasgow
in the land of the beautiful.
You're wondering how I got away with it, eh?
-Well, I'm assuming you are. -[ Bell dings ]
Since you're watching this film.
CAPTAIN: Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
This is your Captain.
We're about to start our descent
into Los Angeles LAX Airport,
where the local time is 2:34 p.m.,
and the weather is a clear and sunny 72 degrees.
The rest of you will be travelling to '70s Glasgow,
where it is a constant bleak and frosty,
and the, uh, outlook is grim.
MUD: ♪ I really love your tiger light ♪
♪ That's neat, that's neat, that's neat, that's neat ♪
♪ I really love your tiger feet ♪
♪ Your tiger feet ♪
ALAN: Glasgow wasn't all bad.
We lived in a decent house.
I had two sisters, so I had my own bedroom.
This is me doing a closing encore at the Barrowlands --
with a tennis racket.
What a tool.
[ Music playing ]
[ Singing softly ]
Thank you, Glasgow!
Goodnight!
[ Panting ]
Jesus Christ!
Have you got your sister's make-up on?
I'm not a pooftie, Dad.
Well, why you poncing about like one?
-You're a bloody disgrace. -I'm just pissing about, Dad.
You should be in the street with your football.
Go and wash that shite off! Go on!
[ Door slams ]
Should be on the street playing football, you wee cunt!
STEWART: ♪ There was a soldier, a Scottish soldier ♪
ALAN: It's a cliche,
but I never felt I fitted in with my family.
JOHN: I just don't get it.
I bet your mates don't spend it on make-up
and posters of men dressed up as tarts.
ALAN: I loved my ma and my sisters.
JOHN: You're not a kid.
ALAN: But Dad -- he hated everything I did.
You get nothing in this life if you're not prepared to work.
ALAN: And Grandma just hated me.
[ Quietly ] Wee ginger bastard.
[ Whistles ]
ALAN: I had two obsessions back then --
serious now -- music and money.
I've got an Advertiser. Do you want an Advertiser, sir?
Put your money in the box. There you go. Thank you.
[ Music playing on stereo ]
[ Young Alan whistles ]
Oh, wee man.
Are you into your music?
Yeah.
You like T-Rex?
Aye. So what?
Nothing. They're fucking cool.
[ Boy shouting in distance ]
Do you like Thin Lizzy?
Do you know they're playing the Barras?
Fuck off. Are they playing the Barras?
Aye. Next week.
Cockney Rebel supporting.
YOUNG BOBBY: You mean in the Barras, aye?
[ Bell dings ]
[ Music plays indistinctly ]
-Bobby. -"Rebel, Rebel."
Fucking ace, man.
Go get the other copy, Bobby.
I'll buy it you.
-Aye? -Aye.
So, where the fuck do you make that kind of money?
See, so I get 4p for every newspaper I sell,
but they cost 15p.
Now if I turn up an hour early, though,
five instead of 6:00, there's no one around.
So, I take a load of extras, sell them on top.
YOUNG BOBBY: They don't count 'em?
YOUNG ALAN: No.
Guess how much I made last week.
-Don't know. -Guess.
A fiver.
20.
I'm gonna be a millionaire one day.
What, selling fucking papers?
YOUNG ALAN: [ Laughs ] Fuck off, Bobby,
-I'm just a rebel. -BOTH: Rebel!
♪ Rebel, Rebel, you've torn your dress ♪
♪ Rebel, Rebel, your face is a mess ♪
[ Sighs ]
ALAN: Dad was a talentless bastard,
but he had one skill.
He could smell money, like a pig with truffles.
-[ Door slams ] -ALAN: I earned it.
He's not lying, Dad.
Mum, I earned it. I swear I did.
I'd just sell a few extras, I take.
You mean steal.
Dad, I actually increased circulation.
Oh, it's okay to steal from the people paying your wages.
-He's doing them a favor. -Dad, it's not fucking stealing.
-No! No! -Don't you dare!
JOHN: You think you're clever, Alan,
But you're not clever. You know nothing.
Oh, John! John!
-Darling, let me see you. -[ Door slams ]
Oh, you're bleeding.
-Jesus, f-- -It's no good, Ma.
I can't make it stick.
-He'll have to go to A&E. -Alright.
Well, then, you take him, Laura.
-[ Breathes heavily ] -And if anyone asks, Al,
you fell when you were out.
Okay?
That's my good boy.
ALAN: It was shameful if Social Services
paid you a visit back then.
Like most families,
we sorted out our own mess.
ANNOUNCER: Hear the band the whole world is talking about.
Oasis, live at the Hollywood Bowl,
only on KPWR.
ALAN: Oi, Mate. Slow down a minute.
-ANNOUNCER: Where rock rocks. -Mate.
DEEJAY: Wow. That gig is sold out.
These guys, they are like the new Beatles.
ALAN: The 1960s, they basically buried Jesus,
and Bowie was the new messiah.
I wanted to walk where he walked
and do all the things he did.
[ David Bowie's "Rebel, Rebel" plays ]
But, I didn't have any talent,
which limited my options some.
JOHN: Okay, son, you're gonna be Murray's apprentice.
-This is a big opportunity. -Right.
Hey, hey, hey. Don't embarrass me, alright?
-[ Car horn honks ] -Good boy.
-[ Breathes heavily ] -[ Metal clanging ]
ALAN: I tried not to embarrass my dad,
but that didn't stop his mates from ripping my pants off
and spraying my balls red...
You fucking wee tube.
ALAN: ...as an initiation.
[ Water running ]
Fucking bastards.
-Fucking... -You dirty wee ginger bastard.
Oh, no. Fuck! Grandma, no, I can explain.
-Announcer: President Kennedy... -ALAN: People talk about telly
in reference to history.
You remember watching the news about Kennedy,
or the moon landing.
Queen's Coronation.
Fuck that.
There was only one historical televised event in our house.
They're a group called the Sex Pistols.
ALAN: And that changed everything.
♪ I am an anti-Christ ♪
♪ And I am an anarchist ♪
♪ Don't know what I want, but I know how to get it ♪
♪ I wanna destroy the passer-by ♪
Hit record. The new craze, they tell me.
♪ Cause I wanna be
♪ Anarchy ♪
♪ No dogs body ♪
♪ Anarchy for the UK ♪
♪ It's coming sometime and maybe... ♪
What a fucking rotter. You dirty fucker.
♪ Your future dream is a shopping scheme ♪
♪ 'Cause I ♪
♪ I wanna be
♪ Anarchy ♪
♪ In the city and I wanna be anarchy ♪
MCLAREN: Musicians are such boring people.
Why should talent have anything to do with rock and roll?
Why should music be in the possession
of people so [bleep] dull?
Announcer: I'll say nothing else about him.
We'll be back tomorrow,
I'll be seeing you soon, I hope,
If I'm not seeing you again, from me though, goodnight.
ALAN: Now there were new rules.
There were no rules.
I didn't need talent.
I just needed a guitar and some mates.
[ Distorted guitars playing ]
We have Andrew Innes on lead guitar.
And on the bass guitar, the wee ginger bastard himself,
Alan McGee.
[ Young Bobby shouting ]
Look at this, son.
Is this this new punk rock thing?
Aye.
What's the name of this outfit?
[ Young Bobby grunts ]
-The Drains. -The Drains.
Well, I don't want you blocking the drains, Bobby.
Just keep it down a wee bit, eh?
-Aye, see you, Dad. -The fucking Drains, eh?
-[ Door closes ] -Your dad's cool, Bobby.
What's that thing he was wearing?
Ah, he's into his politics.
He'll run for Parliament one day.
Aye, he's a socialist.
My dad talks about socialists. Fucking hates 'em.
Oh, what's your old man into?
Just boring stuff.
What's all this Grandma Barr tells us, painting your pubes?
Oh no, Dad. That was just fucking some --
Are you fucking mental? What's gotten into you?
This is all that punk rock shite they've been talking about, aye.
-Hey, this is a decent house. -Oh, aye.
Hey, if I so much as hear you mention those Sexy Pistols,
you'll wish you were never born.
Now get that shit off.
You look ridiculous.
YOUNG INNES: And what have we got up here?
Lena Zavaroni, The fucking Bay City Rollers.
Ah, let's go to London. Let's just fucking go.
My Dad'll never let me go to London, Innes.
Doesn't matter. You're nearly 18.
[ The Damned's "New Rose" plays ]
JOHN: Do you know what punk means?
It's American slang for homosexuals in prison.
THE DAMNED: ♪ I got a feeling inside of me ♪
♪ It's kinda strange like a stormy sea ♪
♪ I don't know why, I don't know why ♪
Have you ever even been to London?
-Do you know anyone there? -No.
I can be whatever I wanna be in London.
My dad'll skin me alive, you daft cunt.
Fucking do you for kidnapping.
And you for kiddie fiddling, Alan.
You come and join us when you got some pubes, eh, Bob.
[ Laughter ]
We've only just started going out with each other.
INNES: You're a ginger prick, Alan.
You've got a chance to become a qualified electrician.
You cannae just leave.
Innes, it's in here, man.
Can you hold that for us, pal?
Right, here we go.
It feels like -- like you're running away from me.
THE DAMNED: ♪ I can't stop ♪
-Wanker. -[ Young Bobby laughs ]
BOTH: Oh, fuck off.
You two, out.
Fucking hell, right.
I'll get you in the Freemasons. We look after one another.
Fucking hell! Piss off.
I'll write to you every day, Yvonne.
Fucking pen pal.
THE DAMNED: ♪ Why should it be? ♪
-No! -Alright.
THE DAMNED: ♪ I don't deserve somebody this great ♪
Think about the future, son, eh?
I'm always thinking about the future, Dad.
It's you that's not.
-[ Horn blares ] -[ Rock music plays ]
ALAN: Los Angeles.
Land of the back stabbers,
the vacuous, and the soulless.
They say in London, you're never more
than 6 feet away from a sewer rat.
Well, in LA, it's the same,
except here, it's dealers...
-[ Knocks on door ] -ALAN: ...whores, pimps,
and fucking agents.
-Sup, man, how you doing? -Good to see you, Rich.
RICH: Don't mind if I do, huh?
You Brits are fucking crazy, man.
You come to L.A. You hang out in a fucking hotel room.
That's why you guys are all pale.
So, we got the, uh...
-[ Sniffs ] -Got the what?
The gear.
[ Laughing ]
RICH: I'm fucking with you, man.
Got the fucking gear. It's strong though, man.
Okay, that shit's like some new shit that's come in.
People going crazy over that shit.
That is all there.
ALAN: Forget everything in that last voice-over!
I fucking love LA!
-Later, bro. -I've got it! I've got it.
Yeah, I'll call you. Cheers, Rich.
-[ Door closes ] -[ Upbeat music playing ]
[ Telephone ringing ]
Hey, Felipe! Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's right, yeah.
Gemma, it's the magazine. Yeah, some interview.
Yeah, show them my poolside table,
take in a couple of smudges.
Yeah, lovely. Love you.
[ Alan sighs ]
YOUNG INNES: Oh, this is fucking great.
Well, what do you think?
It's a shithole, Innes.
That may very well be the case, but it's fucking free.
Where do we sleep?
Anywhere you like.
What the fuck, man?
It's London. What did you expect?
I'm a nihilist, man.
There's nothing to it.
[ Syringe clangs ]
ALAN: So anyway, I'd left a decent job,
decent home, decent birds,
to move into some London shithole with my best mates
and some random smackheads.
Thought I got scurvy once.
-Scurvy? -Yeah, scurvy.
Can you spell that for me?
Yeah, S-C-U-R-V-E --
No, "Y." Fucking one of them.
Scurvy is like a medieval disease
that pirates would get from not eating properly.
We settled down, despite the squalor.
By the time we got to London, punk was over.
It had left all these various counter-cultures in its wake,
all wanting to be seen and heard.
We spent our dole money making a demo.
Bobby's learning bass with Caesar McNulty.
-From Altered Images? -Aye.
Throb's learning guitar. It's in the demo.
Just smell that, Alan. Do you know what it is?
Is it B-O? Fish?
It's the smell of possibilities.
Laughing Apple.
Hopeless this morning.
-MAN: No. -Laughing Apple.
I heard this job's going at British Rail.
British Rail?
I could go London to Glasgow line to see Yvonne.
Fuck Yvonne.
No, no, let's face it, one of us needs a job.
You can't run a venue and press records
and promote a band on 13 quids a week, can we?
Laughing Apple.
Greatest band to come out of Scotland!
-Laughing Apple! Laughing Apple! -Laughing Apple!
Greatest band to come out of Scotland!
MAN: Fuck off home, you scroungers.
Cunt!
[ Band tuning instruments ]
ALAN: We sorted out our line up
with that nihilist, the skaghead flatmate, on drums.
Are you sure about him?
I didn't say he could play. I said he had a kit.
[ Playing drums ]
It'll be fine.
Hello, we are the Laughing Apple,
and nobody knows why.
[ Playing guitar riff ]
♪ I would never leave my trust to her ♪
♪ I would deny my love ♪
♪ I leave my all to her ♪
♪ I leave my clothes maybe ♪
♪ I'll leave my memory ♪
♪ I live for passion ♪
♪ I love to go away go away ♪
♪ Go away, go away, go away ♪
♪ Goodbye ♪
♪ I love you precious feeling ♪
[ Playing drum solo ]
[ Plays off rhythm ]
You alright? You good?
Yeah.
Thank you, cheers.
ALAN: So now I had a proper job
that I proper fucking hated.
Come on, lads and lasses.
But even though we weren't selling out gigs,
I was still spending every penny
pressing our records.
Ah, good.
ALAN: Surprisingly...
We sold all the other copies.
You have?
Oh, yeah, yeah, I thought you would.
Do you have any more bands on your label?
-Label? -[ Train rumbling ]
Get your tickets out! Come on!
ANNOUNCER ON TV: This year's Christmas number one
is from Renée and Renato,
and here they are with "Save Your Love."
[ Music playing ]
[ Machine whirring ]
♪ Save your love, my darling ♪
♪ Save your love ♪
[ Machine continues whirring ]
♪ A serenade I long to sing you ♪
So, how's it working out in London, eh?
Couldn't be better.
[ Chuckles ] Tell that to your pal, Innes.
Had a kidney pack up and moved back.
Drugs, no doubt -- that and living in a shithole.
ALAN: Innes was more into the scene
than just the music, and he did lose a kidney.
No, Mum, he's on the mend,
and his dad says he can move back
only if he gets a place at Uni though.
But we've got a new guitarist now,
and he's more sensible.
[ Crowd chattering ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
GEMMA: So, you were shooting for the moon,
but you still had a boring job, huh?
Come on, all jobs are boring, when you think about it.
Even being a millionaire is bloody monotonous.
You know, as soon as someone makes a million,
all they can think about doing is making another million,
another million, another million --
Well, hence drowning in money.
I told you that?
Your dream, your recurring nightmare.
Have it on a sandwich. You'll be great. Thank you.
ANNOUNCER: The Christmas number one 1983,
The Flying Pickets.
ALAN: I've started focusing on promoting the bands now,
managing.
JOHN: Brian Epstein, eh?
Well, he was a Jessie, you know.
Yvonne, every Christmas --
-she turns up here with you... -[ Yvonne Sobbing ]
JOHN: ...I breathe a sigh of relief.
[ Gulps ]
-[ Guard whistles ] -[ Train horn blows ]
Yvonne moved down to London. We got married.
She started working in the office with me at British Rail,
ALAN: We tried to be a normal couple, but...
We're starting a new club?
[ Music playing faintly ]
[ Rock music plays in distance ]
[ Rock music plays indistinctly ]
[ Brakes squeak ]
Oi!
You Alan McGee?
You owe me 15 quid cab fare.
What? You talking to me?
Where's the PA?
ALAN: Every now and then,
a band comes along that changes your life.
Television Personalities changed mine.
[ Engine idling ]
[ Guitar distortion buzzing ]
LANDLORD: Who the fuck are you?!
[ Feedback ]
ALAN: Part cabaret.
Go faster.
ALAN: Part chaos.
Musician. Engineer.
ALAN: Piss take punks.
♪ Walkin' down the Kings Road ♪
Organized anarchy.
SINGER: ♪ I see so many faces ♪
♪ Many places ♪
♪ They come down for the day ♪
Fuck me!
-This thing run on gas? -[ Volume increases ]
SINGER: ♪ And try and look trendy ♪
-[ Crowd cheering ] -♪ I think it's a shame ♪
I'll need that an' all.
SINGER: ♪ That they all look the same ♪
♪ Here they come ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ The part time punks ♪
♪ Here they come ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ The part time punks ♪
♪ The part time punks! ♪
♪ Then they go to Rough Trade ♪
♪ To buy Siouxsie and the Banshees ♪
♪ They heard John Peel play it ♪
♪ Just the other night ♪
♪ Just the other night! ♪
♪ They'd like to buy the O-Level single ♪
♪ Or read about Seymour ♪
♪ But they're not pressed in red ♪
♪ So they buy The Lurkers instead ♪
♪ The Lurkers instead! ♪
SINGER: ♪ Oh, here they come ♪
-[ Crowd cheering ] -♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ The part time punks! ♪
Thank you, thank you.
We are the Television Personalities,
this next song is the same as the last one...
only louder!
[ Crowd cheering ]
♪ They play their records very loud ♪
♪ And pogo in the bedroom ♪
-♪ In front of the mirror ♪ -[ Crowd cheering ]
♪ But only when their mum's gone out ♪
ALAN: They never made it though.
Sexton Ming and Jowe Head were performance artists,
and the band was just an extension of that.
Dan Treacy was a brilliant front man.
Sofa surfer got locked out one night
and kicked half to death by some cunts.
He never really recovered.
The "Slaughterhouse" Joe Foster,
the anarchist with multiple personalities,
all of them mad,
Ed Ball, the coolest fucker you've ever seen,
even when he lost his hair,
and Dick Green, the dullest man to ever tune up a guitar.
With these three liabilities,
I knew we could take over the world.
♪ The part time punks ♪
ANNOUNCER: The 1985 Christmas number one, it's Shakin'.
Merry Christmas Everyone.
ALAN: I mean, we were still working for the railways,
but my next thing, I'm trying to get this fanzine together.
Like, it's a magazine, to sell to fans at the gigs.
Trying to get into publishing really.
JOHN: Come on.
BARBARA: Well, I am proud of you, son.
It's good to have a dream.
JOHN: Come on.
We need more dreamers in this family.
Your dad's never really had a dream.
Did you, John?
No, maybe it's a good job I didn't.
Who'd have put a roof over our head and food on the table, eh?
[ Record player crackling ]
[ Alan sighs ]
GEMMA: It must have been hard though.
It's 10 to 4:00. You're in work at 7:00.
I dunno. I got a real buzz out of being the outsider.
I was answering to no one.
[ Train rumbling ]
Except the rail company.
[ Chuckles ] True. What a bunch of cunts.
-[ Train horn ] -[ Alan gasps ]
GEMMA: So, would you say that managing Jesus and Mary Chain
was your first big break?
Uh, I didn't really see it as a break at the time
because you're too busy getting on with it,
but, yeah, I knew I'd found something special.
Jesus and Mary Chain.
The Jesus and Mary Chain.
Jesus and Mary Chain.
-Jesus... -...and...
-...Mary... -...Chain.
The Jesus and Mary Chain.
[ Man speaks Dutch ]
-Hi, guys. -ALAN: Let's rewind.
[ Music rewinding ]
So, I'm in London getting a decent turnout for the club,
recording demos for the bands that ask,
signing, pressing, and selling records
for the ones that we fucking love.
In Glasgow, word is,
we're big-time Charlies down in London,
and Bobby is putting
Primal Scream together with Innes,
who's getting over losing his kidney.
He gets given a demo to give to me.
Interesting racket -- Velvets meets The Stooges.
We come down to do a gig. Joe does the sound.
But Joe had worked his way through a bag of pink speed
and hadn't slept in days.
[ Club music playing in background ]
Chaos, straight off.
[ Crowd cheering ]
Fuck it.
But I loved it.
[ Rock music playing ]
I signed them.
[ Music continues ]
The drummer, trappy cunt, complained about the money,
so we sack him off, we put Bobby in.
It's two drums on stands -- Any fucker can do it.
Abraca-fucking-dabra. Now they're sexy.
Joe does the recordings
with that same mental, evil, fucking racket.
[ Distorted music playing ]
John Peel plays the record. It goes bananas.
I sign them to a bigger label.
I stay on as manager.
They record "Psychocandy." Bang!
The album goes gold.
We're in the charts -- Proper charts.
-Jesus and Mary Chain. -The Jesus and Mary Chain.
MAN: Jesus and Mary Chain.
[ Overlapping talking ]
Recent concert has been completely dogged by riots.
People say that it was you who organized the riots
at The Jesus and Mary Chain concerts.
People can say what they want.
[ Background music playing ]
WOMAN: That happened tonight accompanied by,
no doubt, rioting.
-It's... -Jesus and Mary Chain.
ALAN: You see, magic isn't about pulling rabbits out of hats,
but it is about making something materialize.
[ Music playing ]
Hailed as the most controversial band
since the Sex Pistols.
JIM: We're not remotely like the Sex Pistols.
The comparison's silly.
Don't particularly like them, so...
We're a very commercial group, you know.
Some say that The Jesus and Mary Chain
is all about aggression, violence.
You know what The Beatles did
when they were doing it in the '80s?
We've got our eyes on the pop charts, you know,
direct competition is, like,
Culture Club and Duran Duran.
DUTCH INTERVIEWER: The New Musical Express
compared it with Joy Division for its intensity.
Joy Division were fucking shite.
We don't even like being mentioned
in the same breath as them.
Joy Division were boring.
-[ Record scratches ] -[ Crickets chirping ]
ALAN: Conjuring success and victory,
but these days, that's in film, and TV and music.
[ Chattering indistinctly ]
See, if you possess a certain understanding,
you can make it work in your favor.
-Don't wanna know. -Gonna be bigger than U2.
We were being magicians with Creation Records.
We were like accidental alchemists.
Sometimes we seemed to turn shit into gold.
Alan, bank statements.
ALAN: And sometimes, much as we loved it...
it just stayed shit.
[ Screams ] Fuck!
♪ So young ♪
Look, is it just the cash flow? Because if it is...
I'm afraid it's the maintenance
of your overdraft and loans.
I'm about to do a deal that is gonna turn everything around.
What's that?
Demos of future releases, chart material, pure pop.
Hits!
Alan, the money you earn from managing the, uh, Mary and...
-Jesus and Mary Chain. -Jesus and Mary Chain.
You can't keep funding a label out of your own pocket.
-[ Chuckles ] -ALAN: Why not?
Some of these acts I've got are gonna be bigger than U2.
I've done the research, and the fact is,
the record industry in this country
ain't what it used to be.
Comedy is the new rock and roll, Alan, Newman and Baddiel,
they just sold out Wembley Arena.
"That's your Mom, that is!"
[ Laughs ] They're very good,
but do you have an act that can do that?
Will any of they? No.
What you have is a very small, potentially healthy business
with a thick and lowering glass ceiling.
What we have to do is minimize the venture,
try and increase the profits
and then use them to address the charges on your debts.
Just run a small tight ship.
It's not the '60s anymore, Alan.
Or?
Or you lose everything.
Thanks a bunch, Nostradamus.
Catch you later, eh?
[ Music playing ]
Joe, I've just been meeting the biggest cunt of my life,
I mean, everyone, every fucker in the office,
10:00 a.m. tomorrow morning.
Whilst we appreciate everything that's going on at the moment.
[ Upbeat music plays ]
Shhh! Shut up, Ed!
It's the fucking bailiffs.
-Who? The bailiffs?
-ED: Oh, man! -No, no, no, no.
We've got a band called The Bailiffs.
No, no, no, no.
Demos, promos, white labels,
anything you can find in this box, any value.
ED: TV piece.
MAN: Hey!
Later.
[ Music continues indistinctly ]
Uh, you're Alan McGee?
As I live and breathe.
Demos, promos, white labels.
Worth a fortune.
Sorry, boys, just on the phone to New York closing a deal.
Got a band that are gonna be bigger than U2,
Unbelievable!
-How much was it again? -£400.
[ Laughs ]
Nae sweat.
Uno. Dos.
Go on, Dick. At this rate, how long?
-[ Belches ] -ALAN: How long can we survive?
At this rate? Alan, we're already dead.
You know, on a long enough timeline,
the survival rate of most things is zero.
JOE: Shut up, Ed. How long?
If we can somehow maintain this line of credit,
-we've got about a month. -Month?
That's not bad. We can fix it.
Rome was built in a month.
That's not exactly the saying.
Shut up, Ed.
We'll just have to postpone the next releases. Fuck it.
We do that, we're not a record label anymore.
Well, I mean, how could things get any worse?
I'm pregnant, Alan.
You see, by then, me and Yvonne had already split up.
But we hooked up one night on the rebound,
and she got knocked up, so...
We're separated.
It doesn't look like we're gonna get back together,
does it, so...
Get a fucking grip, you stupid ginger gargoyle.
ALAN: See, Yvonne had had enough of the all-nighters
and the bands crashing over and poverty.
She was having a baby, and all of that was gonna stop,
whether I liked it or not.
And pretty rude about it.
You horrible goblin.
So, you just weren't ready to be a father?
I had no say.
I'm keeping it. You have no fucking option.
The truth is... we'd drifted apart.
You can't afford to divorce me.
You've got no choice, pal.
But see, if she'd said something,
anything at all, begged me to stay, I would have.
But when someone tells me I don't have a fucking option,
that's when I'm at my absolute worst.
I've got to prove them wrong.
So, you guys split, divorced?
Yeah, she kept the poxy semi, gave birth to Daniel.
Met someone else, he adopted him.
Good man.
Bit of a boring cunt, mind.
Waiter!
So now I was officially single.
-Thatcher's a Nazi. -Yeah.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
-Disgrace to feminism. -Yes!
ALAN: Free to make an absolute twat out of myself
at any opportunity.
MAN: Turns out I went to the doctors,
and it was piles.
WOMAN: Yes!
-[ Laughing ] -Bobby!
-Oh, fuck off. -Aah!
We -- We played a fundraiser for the striking miners last week.
A fundraiser?
Yeah, we raised a few quid, didn't we, Ed?
Fundraising isn't gonna help the oppressed of this country.
You have to be out there, rioting.
Yeah, but that's never gonna happen, is it?
-Oh. -What do you mean?
What do you mean? Of course, it's gonna happen.
Look at the Sandinistas and Nicaragua.
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Look, I'm right behind the Sandinistas,
but there's kids going without food
in those mining villages in Yorkshire.
What a bourgeois thing to say.
Stick to making your little records.
Yeah, fuck off, go on.
Stay away from politics.
Thanks a fucking bunch, boys.
Man! She's right.
Want the boge back?
LEWSBERG: ♪ Up and away in the cold light of day ♪
♪ Up and away ♪
♪ Up and away in the cold light of day ♪
-ALAN: You alright, Mary? -MARY: Aye, Alan, good, and you?
Still teaching?
Aye, primary school.
I can handle the little school kids.
Keep up the good work, eh?
Children are our future.
[ Music continues ]
[ Whirring ]
[ Urinating ]
[ Breathing deeply ]
[ Laughing ]
[ Flushing toilet ]
[ Faucet creaks ]
-[ Tense music playing ] -[ Water running ]
Alright?
ALEISTER: Please allow me to introduce myself.
The name is Aleister, but you can call me Al.
That's a song title if I ever heard one.
Ideas are everywhere.
You have only to reach out...
and grab them.
[ Breathing heavily ]
[ Laughing ]
Who is Aleister Crowley?
ALAN: Aleister Crowley, author of "The Book of Thelema,"
"do what thou wilt," the cultist, and prophet.
My hero!
Famous poet, magician, artist.
Your father has a particular mind.
He only wants what he believes is best for you.
Oh, yeah!
The Stones wrote that song about him.
ALAN: That's right.
I once slept with faith
and found a corpse in my arms when I awoke.
And yet another night,
I drank and danced with doubt
and found her a virgin in the morning.
They called him the wickedest man in the world.
[ Tense music continues ]
He was into child sacrifice.
No, that's a myth.
He was really talking about...
[ Camera clicks ]
You know...
-[ Camera clicks ] -...wanking.
I was wrong and handled the narcotics.
Get to fuck.
Calm down.
-[ Party music playing ] -Who's he talking to?
Anyone that'll listen.
Anyone of an independent mind
must be one who resists authority.
A [echoing] rebel.
[ Rock music plays ]
Take my advice, young man.
Let go of your past.
[ Music continues ]
Well, let's round it up to a nice even number then.
I'll pay you for five next time.
ALEISTER: Stay on the path you have chosen.
♪ Rise you make me ♪
ALEISTER: If enough people agree with and follow the rebel,
then we finally achieve greatness.
ALAN: Crowley was right. We were rebels.
So what if you are going out of business.
We keep doing what we did best,
signing bands that were fucking genius.
[ Music distorts ]
[ Fast-paced rock music plays ]
We'd keep running till the wheels
fell off the fucking bus.
Here's to excess!
Apparently it leads to the Palace of Wisdom.
-WOMAN: William Blake? -[ Glasses clinking ]
"The Marriage of Heaven and Hell."
He might have been describing the entertainment industry.
How did you keep the label going?
I have a dream! We can do this, boys.
Well, I gave that speech about tightening belts,
squeezing money out of every angle,
facing the record pluggers, stepping up fly posting.
Fight of our lives, all that fanny,
And then Ed --
Of all people, Ed pipes up.
Or...
Margaret Thatcher had introduced this thing called...
The Enterprise Allowance Scheme
under the Conservative Government
allows you to have £40 a week extra -- it's free money.
-[ Audience applauding ] -Whoever thought I'd be grateful
to this fucking witch.
Only joking. This bit never happened.
THATCHER: [ Gasps ]
You were running Creation Records
on 40 quid a week each?
We were the coolest label on the planet
and running on empty.
[ Speaking indistinctly ]
Why has he got such a way with women?
-You know why? -Go on.
'Cause he listens -- Or rather he pretends to.
-It's a bad example, yeah. -Where the fuck have you been?
But what's the point in that? I mean, look at her.
She's not gonna have sex with him, is she?
Got more chance than you have talking to Male Silly Bollocks
dancing with himself.
ALAN: That's what's brilliant about it.
Lovely talking to you, darling, Sorry your boyfriend's a tosser.
Hey, big day tomorrow. Yeah?
It's fine. I know what I'm doing, piece of piss.
DICK: Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?
Nah.
-Uh, excuse me? -Alan fucking McGee.
MITCH: I'm not gonna bullshit you, man.
There's no need.
You know what we do,
and you know we're fucking good at it.
Let's face it, Al.
You have got a very, very cool record label.
And with us behind you,
you could become a very wealthy man.
So we are "owned" by a corporation.
but they let us do what we like, you know?
The bean counters just leave us alone
to get on and make great rock and roll records.
-Great! -Good, yeah. Fuck!
Yeah, bottom line.
I'm just like you, Al.
A maverick.
Difference is, I do my thing on the inside.
That's the only way to get results.
Sure. Okay.
People say to me, "Hey, Mitch, you used to have
that real cool record label, what happened?"
And I say to them, "Well, really cool is great,
but it didn't get me that Chateau in the Ardennes."
Or that Primrose Hill postcode, you know what I mean?
ALAN: I've got a vivid imagination.
MITCH: Everyone wants to get rich, Al.
And if that means getting fucked in the arse
every once in a while...
so what?
-MAN: [ Grunting ] -It hurts, initially!
But it's the kind of pain you forget.
Like childbirth.
You alright, Al?
Sorry? Yes.
Uh, what were you saying?
I was saying, have we got a deal?
Corporate always fucks what's cool.
GEMMA: Wait a minute, you turned down a deal
from a major record company and went to a loan shark?
ALAN: Yeah! See, corporations want to own you forever.
The loan shark just wants his money back.
It's a more honest transaction.
You don't pay them...
"we break your fucking legs."
But eventually, you did sign with a corporation.
Eventually.
But on our own terms.
We weren't doing it for ourselves.
We were doing it for the bands.
We had a couple of indie hits in the charts.
I paid them back, and we were flying again.
See, fuck that mullet cunt!
I didn't need a chateau in the Ardennes --
whatever the fuck that is.
All I needed was some mothers' little helpers,
Dixies, Damies, Bobbys, Bennys, Charlies,
Farlies, Jellys, Fannys,
Red Devils, Black Bombers,
Purple Hearts, Special Teas,
a wee bit of Les.
Everything was absolutely fine.
[ Woman screaming ]
Exactly how long has he been in the fucking studio?
Which studio? This is their fifth.
Kevin Shields is a genius.
-Shut up, Ed! -He's absolutely killing us!
You know we're already up to £250,000 in a recording.
He'll fucking ruin us.
DICK: There's no fucking end in sight.
Hey, Joe.
You get yourself down there, get on the desk.
You're a brilliant engineer.
You can get this fucking mixed by the end of the week.
He won't let me near him.
He's not even returning our calls.
-He's got this sonic vision. -Shut up, Ed.
He'll have a fucking hole in his head when I'm done.
I've had to re-mortgage my own house.
-Jesus. -I know.
You own a house?
I don't need this shit!
My mother's sick, and I've got a money-spunking
mad, fucking genius who won't return calls.
Fuck this!
[ Rock music playing ]
Excuse me, Sir, can I help?
I'm here to see my band.
Which band?
My Bloody Valentine.
Oh, right, yeah. Uh, are you Alan McGee?
Yeah, can you let me in, pal?
Well, I've been instructed not to.
Instructed not to? Instructed by whom?
The band, Mr. Shields.
-[ Band music playing ] -Fuck you, you jobsworth!
Who do you think's paying for this fucking studio?
Who do you think's paying your fucking wages?
Now get in there and drag that slippery cunt out here now.
Kevin!
If you don't calm down, Sir.
I'm gonna have to call the police.
Aye, good idea, call them.
I want to report a robbery.
That's my fucking name, you've had everything I've got.
Of course, he's a genius, but two years?
It's not the money but I suppose it is.
It's gonna cost us half a million.
But what really hurts is that we believed in him,
and he treats us like this.
I know the man's a sonic pioneer.
I know he's pushing the envelope.
I know he's making futuristic music
but the problem is, by the time we get to release it,
the future will be a distant fucking memory.
We'll all be long dead. I'm not a philistine.
I know art takes time, but come on, man.
Two weeks to master one track! Two fucking weeks!
Oh, cheers, pal. You can just drop me here. That's great.
We're not a taxi service.
That's perfect, thanks.
[ Music playing in distance ]
JOE: Enough for me. A load of fucking shit.
ALAN: But from every negative comes a positive.
What the fuck is this place?
It's where the young blokes hang.
This is my scene, man.
-ALAN: Ooh, nice. -Thanks.
[ Dance music playing ]
This is Alan. Alan, Bez.
ALAN: They called it acid house, and I appreciated the energy.
What are you -- What are you drinking?
What's that?
-What is it? -ED: Ecstasy.
ALAN: No one was drinking, just water.
Hydration.
ALAN: I fucking hate water.
Give it 20 minutes.
ALAN: But it was when ecstasy kicked in
that I really fuckin' got it.
See, in the old days,
it was cheap speed made in bathtubs.
Or prescription uppers -- Dixies, Bombers --
both of which are pretty anti-social.
And nobody could afford cocaine. That was far too chic.
But this stuff,
E's, cheap and friendly.
A revelation and a revolution.
[ Up-beat party music plays ]
It all became clear in that instant,
pop culture never dies.
It reincarnates.
Everything was going to be alright.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Up-beat party music resumes ]
MAN: ♪ We are now in our minds ♪
♪ You cannot turn us back ♪
♪ We're marching to the hands of time ♪
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Up-beat party music resumes ]
ALAN: The future has arrived, Ed,
We gotta get Bobby into this, Gillespie.
He'll fucking love it, man!
ALAN: And then, Ed, again -- Of all people, Ed pipes up.
We should put acid records out.
Ed, you're a genius, man. Yeah, definitely.
I'm telling you, man, I've got it all planned.
ALAN: Definitely.
We can start sampling bits of film, Alan,
and I know all the DJs.
[ News report plays indistinctly ]
[ Cash register dings ]
What's this beat you're spinning, mate?
-It's great. -It's a dishwasher.
All these records that we're gonna be putting out, eh?
Where the fuck are we gonna find the acts, eh?
Manchester.
-Manchester? -Yeah.
[ Upbeat music playing on tape recorder ]
If I ordered a chicken sandwich and an egg sandwich,
which one do you reckon will come first?
What?
MAN: Fuck this. Full of retards.
DICK: Alan! Is he in here?
-Where's Alan? -JOE: You didn't know?
JOE: Know what?
-He's gone. -He's gone where?
Alan, he's gone.
What do you mean, gone?
Gone to Manchester.
What, for a meeting?
[ Dance music playing ]
ED: Alan feels like he needs to be submerged
in the waters of acid house.
JOE: I wonder where he got that from.
It's him and his fucking silly bollocks.
Alan doesn't need to be in Manchester.
He needs to be in London with us.
Running this record label, remember?
Good luck trying to get him back, Dick.
Much better drugs up there.
How is it little fishes can swim with the big sharks
and not get eaten, huh?
Gotta be faster, more nimble.
I could be like BMG. They're a great white.
You notice a scene rising up --
an A&R arsehole has to take it to an executive arsehole,
who's got to take it to the chairman arsehole,
and if they agree, they take it to the lawyer arseholes.
And when that's done, they all go to their marketing arseholes
and when everyone's got their fingers out of each other's
arseholes, they might sign a band.
And by then, everyone's missed the fucking boat.
With Creation, it was just me, and I'm at the scene.
I had first choice.
I had the artist signed, recorded, pressed,
and spinning in clubs before the corporates
could open a bottle of Chardonnay.
[ Dance music plays ]
You left your business,
all your stuff, without any warning.
ALAN: Yeah, well, that's rock and roll.
Then, it was just like grab a bag and fuck off someplace.
No planning, no packing, shite like that -- just vanish.
No, not when you have a business!
The boys all had it under control.
Besides, when I got back,
I was totally rejuvenated.
Babe, I need that PolyGram contract now!
We were a solvent business,
flying by the seat of our leather pants, maybe,
But getting away with it.
These guys are gonna be bigger than U2, ya cunt.
No, but I've got it in front of me in black and white.
WOMAN: Creation Records?
-What? -Alan McGee?
McGee? That's me.
[ Both cheering ]
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
[ Women cheering ]
Ed! Ed!
-Help me out here! -ED: Girls...
ALAN: Teenage Fanclub are now my band.
I will ring him the fuck again, then.
[ Screaming ]
[ Telephone rings ]
Hello?
MAN: ♪ I know I can't believe ♪
Yeah, I'll be right up.
Get me a flight to Glasgow!
No! no! A flight tomorrow's no good.
Hey, pal. Can you drive me to Glasgow?
-Glasgow? -[ Car honks ]
ALAN: Mate, mate! Hold the train.
-[ Whistle blowing ] -CONDUCTOR: Calm down, son,
There's another one in half an hour.
Thank fuck for that.
It's the sleeper, mind, but you'll still get there.
-The sleeper? -[ Laughs ]
Jesus, man.
-[ Train rumbles ] -ALAN: Fuck...
Fuck!
Susie!
Laura!
[ Sobbing ]
She's gone?
[ Voice breaking ] I tried. I couldn't get a flight.
-It's alright, Alan. -ALAN: I tried.
I couldn't get a flight.
[ All sobbing ]
It's okay, darling. You're here now.
You're here for the funeral.
Come on.
[ Guitar playing ]
-BARBARA: What song was that? -I just --
I just made it up.
You just made it up? Do you know anything I know?
[ Chuckling ] I don't --
-I don't think so. -[ Both laughing ]
I'm sure you get this from my side of the family though.
-I'm sure it's not your dad's. -Oh, God, no.
You keep practicing, son. You keep practicing.
Aye.
You're gonna be a big star one day.
I hope.
[ Guitar playing softly ]
[ Somber music playing ]
BARBARA: Alan, I've been saving up,
just wee bits here and there.
It's not much, but I want you to take it.
Mom, you don't have to do that.
I know I don't have to do it, but I want to do it.
I want to give you this so you can go to London --
and get started.
You follow your dream, come back a big pop star.
Show your dad. Show everybody.
That's my boy.
[ Somber music continues ]
[ Loud banging on door ]
BARBARA: Oh, you can hammer away all you like.
-JOHN: Let me in! -No, I will not, John McGee.
You have got my heart roasted.
You've laid a hand on our Alan for the last time!
You would cause a fight in an empty fuckin' house,
and now you've got me swearing!
You're just jealous!
You're just jealous because Alan's different!
He's artistic!
He's got imagination,
and you have got none!
-[ Banging continues ] -Alan! Comin'?
Yeah.
[ Somber music continues ]
JOHN: Such a shock, you know?
Thank you so much for coming over.
I really appreciate that.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
How are you doing, Alan?
Alright, yeah. I've got a splitting headache.
I'll get you some water, okay?
There you go.
Taking drugs at your mother's funeral, eh?
It's paracetamol. He's been having headaches.
Dad, please --
Dad.
Da...
They say, other than losing a child,
losing your mother is the worst bereavement,
and it happens to nearly all of us.
I wish it had been that sour-faced,
old coffin dodger I was burying.
Wee ginger bastard.
How you feeling, mate?
Sorry about all this.
I mean, they insisted on staying.
I can get rid of them if you want.
[ Sighing ] Let them sleep.
[ Both chuckle ]
We were living the rock and roll even more than the bands were.
Surely that made things harder to get done?
No, not really, because we only did something
if we really believed in it.
And somehow...
an album would just, like...
appear, materialize,
and suddenly, everything would just make sense.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ Together as one ♪
You've fucking done it!
This is gonna go down as one
of the greatest albums in rock history!
And it's my mates from school!
[ Applause ]
Bobby, man.
You're the fucking dude, man!
Whoa!
You guys are gonna be bigger than U2!
Wished that you would have come to join us here,
be part of Creation and...
[ Sighs ] Nah, fuck that. I'm down to one kidney.
You cunts would have fucking killed me.
You off your head?
ALAN: I suppose we were a victim of our own success.
Three international hit albums.
We'd done amazing by ourselves.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ Come together as one ♪
ALAN: But we had to move forward.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ We are together ♪
ALAN: Not for us.
We owed it to the bands that stuck with us.
Acts that would never leave,
but deserved to be heard, by the whole world.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ Because together we got power ♪
♪ Apart we got power ♪
♪ Together as one ♪
ALAN: We had no choice but to take Sony's money.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ We are together ♪
ALAN: It's time to stop fucking about and grow up.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ Today on this program you will hear ♪
♪ Gospel and rhythm and blues ♪
So what if we're owned by a corporation?
They let us do pretty much what we liked,
The bean counters leave us to get on with making records.
Yeah, but I'm a maverick. I'm doing my thing inside...
No matter how much smoke they blew up our asses,
Sony didn't care that we were
the coolest record label on the planet.
And all the critical acclaim meant fuck all to them.
We had to deliver a band that were gonna sell multi-millions.
A band that could justify their investment.
PRIMAL SCREAM: ♪ I was blind ♪
♪ Now I can see ♪
ALAN: See, I'm a tight bastard.
That Sunday was Mom's anniversary,
and I'd gone to visit my dad and my sisters
on a cheap, away-day return.
I hadn't packed a bag, didn't even have a toothbrush.
[ Whistle blowing ]
Stop! What time's the next train?
Oh, that's it for tonight. Next one's 6:00 a.m.
ALAN: I'll get this one then. Hold on!
No! Sorry!
Oh! You again, you jobsworth cunt.
Cunt!
See, this jobsworth prick.
This prick didn't know it. He changed history.
Fuck!
Fuck you!
All right, Susan.
Yeah, I missed the bloody train.
I know.
Got any plans?
Well, if you're not sick of the sight of me,
I've got 18 Wheeler playing down at King Tut's.
Get there early. Check out the support, maybe.
Oh, come on, Alan.
Dad's never exactly been good
at showing affection, has he?
Too late for affection.
Just appreciate a wee bit of recognition.
He still thinks I'm a deluded wee punk.
He does not. He recognizes you're doing well.
-He's just...torn. -"Torn"?
Aye, he doesn't understand all this music business stuff.
He's frightened you're gonna fall on your arse.
Ah, see, he wants me to fall down
and just stay the fuck down, but I keep getting back up.
He does not -- He just wants you
to have a job with security.
ALAN: Security?! Talk about delusional.
I've got a company with Sony, for fuck's sake.
Oh, I know.
You're Thatcher's little wet dream, you, ain't you?
You're an entrepreneur. [ Laughs ]
I don't care who you're friends with.
You're not booked. So you're not playing tonight.
BOUNCER: What, you want a slot?
I'll give you a fucking slot in your throat.
What you drinking?
Vodka tonic, please. I'll get us a seat.
BOUNCER: Fucking cunts.
Double vodka and tonic,
double Jack Daniel's and Coke, please.
Hey, hey. You're Alan McGee.
Local boy done good.
What brings you home, pal?
Oh, just a bit of family business.
Any of this lot yours?
Aye, 18 Wheeler.
And then my pal, Debbie, is on support.
What was that back at the door?
It's just some Manchester band giving me some fanny
about saying they were booked to play tonight,
but it's the first I've heard of it.
Looked like it was gonna kick off.
Aye. Hope not tonight, though, because I've got no bouncers.
But don't tell them that.
Better squeeze them in somewhere.
You don't want a bunch of Manc scallies kicking off.
Trust me. I lived there.
I will, Al.
Gave them 20 minutes.
Give the DJ time to go for a shite.
What they called?
Oh, it's a crap name, man.
Oasis.
[ Music plays indistinctly ]
[ Feedback ]
Malcolm.
Malcolm!
Go and have a fag.
It's 20 minutes, you understand?
We start proceedings with a band
who should be called Fucking Cheeky Bastards.
I'd like to welcome to the stage, Oasis.
[ Audience applauding ]
MAN: Get on with it.
I mean, there's you talking about the recognition
you need with your own dad,
and you're not even paying attention to your own wain.
He's just a kid, and that's your family.
Dad's got a grandson he doesn't even see.
Do you think that doesn't disappoint him?
[ Susan speaking distorts ]
[ Distorted guitar plays ]
♪ People say it's just a waste of time ♪
♪ Then they said I should feed my head ♪
♪ That to me was just a day in bed ♪
♪ I'll take my car and drive real far ♪
♪ They're not concerned about the way we are ♪
♪ In my mind, my dreams are real ♪
♪ Now we're concerned about the way I feel ♪
♪ Tonight ♪
♪ I'm a rock 'n' roll star ♪
♪ Tonight ♪
♪ I'm a rock 'n' roll star ♪
PRESENTER: In just under three years,
Oasis will have gone from being a new signing
to one of rock's true giants.
PRESENTER 2: The live gig of the decade.
PRESENTER 3: Oasis gears up to rock
a quarter of a million fans.
PRESENTER 4: Oasis is gonna play to more
than a third of a million
people in just over one day.
OASIS: ♪ Today was just a blur ♪
♪ You've got a head like a ghost train ♪
GIRL: I don't know any teenage lad
who wouldn't wanna be like them.
[ Crowd shouting and cheering ]
I don't know any teenage girl that would say that
they didn't actually want to go out with Liam Gallagher.
[ Rock music playing ]
-[ Shouting and cheering ]
♪ But you don't care ♪
Noel, I love your eyebrows! They're sexy.
PRESENTER 4: The most honest band on the planet.
We're not pop stars. We're lads.
OASIS: ♪ That the devil sends ♪
♪ You think they're talking about you ♪
♪ But you don't know who, I'll be scraping their lives ♪
♪ From the sole of my shoe tonight ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
[ Guitar solo ]
-[ Song resolves ] -[ Cheers and applause ]
Nice work.
Did you hear that?
Yeah.
-Good band. -Good?
They're fucking amazing.
Hey, man, come here.
-Who do I talk to? -What, in the band?
-Aye, who's the leader? -Joan of Arc.
He's the only sensible cunt amongst them.
-Do you want a record deal? -You what?
Do you want a record deal? I'm Alan McGee --
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, cool.
I know who you are.
You're not already signed, are you?
-No. -Have you got a manager?
No. Do you want a tape?
I don't need a tape. I've heard and seen enough.
Mate, calm down.
You've had a drink, and you're a bit excited.
Take a tape.
ALAN: That tape had most of "Definitely Maybe' on it.
PRESENTER: The fastest-selling album ever.
25 weeks in the charts, with singles like...
NOEL: "Live Forever"! "Rock 'N' Roll Star"!
ALAN: See, Noel had been writing songs since he was 16,
and Liam...
Liam was just a born rock star.
Give it up for Oasis,
making their TV debut with "Supersonic."
[ Crowd cheering ]
Put this on it.
My band's just nicked the headliner's rider,
so we're gonna do one.
Big fan of your label.
BAND MEMBER: Hey, hey.
ALAN: It was a case of right place, right time.
Synchronicity.
Fuck you!
From the moment I was born, I was meant to miss that train.
Some people's destiny was to meet particular people,
or go to foreign lands.
Well, my whole life had been leading up to me
missing that fucking train.
Now you had one of the biggest bands in the world.
Finally! Bigger than U2.
[ Both laugh ]
Where does it go from here?
Well, for me, it's a party in a club on Sunset.
You coming?
I'd love to, but I have a deadline.
Hey, can we meet up again when I'm back in London?
-I can do an update piece. -Absolutely.
Oh, if there's one thing I love more than being talked about,
it's being written about.
I just wish I could write it.
What're you talking about?
It's a puff piece, mainly photos.
Oh! Tell them to get the fuck.
Go and sell it to Rolling Stone or someone.
Tell them Alan McGee is up there with Brian Epstein,
Peter Grant, Malcolm McLaren,
as one of the greatest rock managers in history.
That's what I'd tell them anyway.
You're so modest.
Modesty gets you nowhere. Listen.
I know that every fucker out there knows,
that I'm talentless.
But I'm a situationist, huh?
-Yeah. -I make things happen.
Sheer determination, I -- I get it.
You do.
Well, let's definitely meet up in London.
I-I might be in a position
where I can write a piece that matches your ego.
That's a very noble ambition.
Good luck with that.
Hey, oh, can I have my glasses?
Thanks. Have fun at your party.
ALAN: Like I said, LA --
-land of the soulless... -WOMAN: Cheers.
ALAN: ...the vacuous,
the back stabbers, and, of course...
-Oh, hey, man. -ALAN: ...the wannabes.
So Noel and Liam, is it true they just beat up each other?
-What? -MAN: The brothers,
do they beat the shit out of each other on stage.
Right.
[ Speaking indistinctly ]
[ Rap music playing ]
MAN: ♪ Yeah ♪
WOMAN: Nice shoes.
Oh, you like them?
Got them in Japan.
By some miracle, they've survived Glastonbury.
Are you English?
-Scottish. -Ah.
And this Glastonbury, is it -- Is it close to Liverpool?
I love The Beatles.
It's a festival.
Like Burning Man, but with rain and mud
and fucking awful toilets.
Cool!
So, what brings you to LA?
Bit of business.
Huh, yeah. What is it you do?
I own a record label.
-Really? -Hmm.
Wow, that is so interesting because, um...
I'm a singer-songwriter, um...
Della.
Will you...
Will you take a listen?
I mean, it needs work,
but it has my number on it on the back.
ALAN: Now, one of three things can happen here.
She gets what she wants.
[ Both moaning ]
ALAN: I get what I want.
DELLA: I'm like a cross between
Joni Mitchell and Patti Smith.
Creation would be the perfect label for me.
How do you know I own Creation?
Or, we both get fuck all
and jog on.
Don't try and hustle a hustler.
I've got people listening to demos all day long.
Thank you.
Fucking asshole.
Alan!
ALAN: You see this Charlie?
He's someone else that's gonna change my life,
and not for the better.
You cheeky fucking...
ALAN: I couldn't remember his name for the life of me.
But when you've done enough drugs...
Rambo, I'm with him.
ALAN: ...you just open your mouth,
and say the first name that comes into your head.
Alright, Ralph?
I was just talking about you the other day to, um...
oh, what's his name, tall fucker with the piggy eyes.
Who gives a fuck? How are you, darling.
I'm good, Ralph. You?
Yeah, really great.
-Actually, really smashing. -How was rehab?
Fantastic. Best ever.
-I'm producing again. -No way!
-Yeah, I know. -ALAN: Back in the zone.
I'm being totally different this time, I swear to God.
A little bird told me you are
fucking killing the music business.
-World domination time. -Too modest.
Um...
Fancy a cheeky toot?
I shall live and die in LA.
ALAN: There are a million Ralphs in LA.
Rastafarians who left the public schools of England
to be Hollywood producers.
Of course, they conned me out of the inheritance.
But who needs a fucking castle. Chin-chin.
ALAN: Never seen a frame of anything he's produced,
and I don't think anyone else had.
Just met at some forgotten Hollywood bash somewhere.
That's the thing about cocaine.
-Shall we? -ALAN: You end up sniffing it
off toilet seats with total strangers
who become your best friend for the next few hours.
RALPH: Ah!
So, what's your new movie about?
Oh, I met this amazing,
really charming young man from Compton,
called Hercules the Reaper.
[ Farts ]
Actually, oh, this place is absolutely moribund.
Let's go to his club.
-His club? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's right up your straza.
-Let's go. -RALPH: Come.
Tidy up.
Here we go.
Oh, Christ.
RALPH: Give us a couple of beers, will you?
This is the life.
Love this town.
[ Sniffles ] Ah.
So, what is this film?
Is it like some kind of, uh, documentary or a...
No, it's a biopic.
Story of a man's incredible life.
Well, it looks like a vanity project
because he's paying for it all, but it's not.
"Forrest Gump" meets "Boyz in the Hood."
-"Forrest Gump"? -RALPH: Yeah.
-What's that about, then? -More like a black Forrest Gump
with good music, you know.
If we're lucky, we'll have them singing songs
and shooting each other in the playground.
I hate biopics.
Yeah, let's hope nobody else sings like you, cunt.
We'll see. Do you need some music for it?
I don't -- What, your kind of music?
[ Exhales ] I don't think so, unless you're gonna Black up.
[ Party music playing ]
Hey.
Herc, my brother.
Boom!
This is my very good friend, Alan.
Where are you?
He's a major player in the music biz.
-Major. -Pull up.
Thank you.
Hello, how are you?
Ralph tell you? He making a movie about me.
-What? -A movie, yes.
HERC: Some real shit.
Rags to riches.
RALPH: But Alan's just like you, Herc.
-He's from the hood. -What?
Well, in the UK, we call them council estates,
but they're really the same thing.
It's just lots of poor people crammed into suffering together.
Hmm, I'd like to visit the UK one day.
Not at the moment, though.
Feds won't let me leave the country.
Oh, the Feds are persecuting Herc, Alan.
They're all up in his shit.
They won't give a brother a break, right?
Right, well...
Brother, take it to the VIP.
Laters, holmes.
You.
-In here. -What's happening?
Whatever you like, my friend.
What happens in Compton, stays in Compton.
[ Laughs ] Hello, ladies.
This is my friend, Alan. He's terribly shy.
[ Insect buzzing ]
[ Maurice beatboxing ]
MAURICE: ♪ If you hear any noise ♪
[ Beatboxing ]
RALPH: Oh, Sleeping Beauty. Welcome back.
-[ Maurice beatboxing ] -This is Maurice.
Fucking fantastic.
-[ Maurice beatboxing ] -[ Fly buzzing ]
I said -- I said you might give him --
give him a record deal.
Maurice, you haven't already got a record deal, have you?
Shit. I didn't -- I didn't think of that.
He might -- He might already have a record deal.
-I don't know. -Ricky ticky tick.
Ricky ticky ticky ticky ticky ticky tick-tick.
-Ralph. -This is...
Ralph!
[ Beatboxing ]
-Ralph, can I have a wee word? -Yeah, yeah, sure.
As I say, you're on my soundtrack,
I swear.
[ Maurice beatboxing ]
[ Laughing ]
[ Serene music playing on radio ]
How did we end up in that fucking crack den?
-Aaah! -I know.
It's awesome, isn't it?
-[ Sighs deeply ] -No one's gonna jack you.
They all know I'm down with Herc's crew.
[ Alan exhaling ]
Looking at that lovely lolly, though, it reminds me,
there's a fabulous whore house over there I used to frequent.
Let's pop in for some breakfast and a happy ending, hmm?
Just take -- take me to the hotel.
Alright, Grandpa.
There we go.
Ah, I'm afraid I can't take you up the hill.
The reverse is a little unpredictable on this thing.
It's alright. [ Coughing ]
Oh...
Well, better out than in, as Mummy used to say.
Oh, now listen.
Tonight, there's a fabulous bash in Topanga.
Porn producer friend of mine.
Wall-to-wall totty.
-Fancy it? -I'd better not.
Fine, well, I'll give you a tinkle later,
in case you grow your cock back.
One for the road?
NEWS REPORTER: We begin with that breaking news.
A state of emergency in California.
Here's what we know right now.
[ Neuroticfish's "They're Coming To Take Me Away" plays ]
Homes have been destroyed there...
...mandatory evacuations of more than...
NEUROTICFISH: ♪ Remember when you ran away ♪
♪ And I got on my knees ♪
♪ And begged you not to leave because I'd go berserk? ♪
♪ Well, you left me anyhow ♪
♪ And then the days got worse and worse ♪
[ Alan screaming ]
♪ They're coming to take me away, ha-ha ♪
♪ They're coming to take me away ♪
♪ Ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-ha ♪
♪ To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time ♪
♪ And I'll be happy to see those nice young men ♪
♪ In their clean white coats ♪
♪ And they're coming to take me away, ha-ha! ♪
[ Glass shattering ]
NEWS REPORTER: ...Southern California this morning.
I want you to take a quick look at this town,
That's actually the main part of the...
NEUROTICFISH: ♪ You know you laughed, I heard you laugh ♪
♪ You laughed, you laughed and laughed ♪
[ Alan screaming ]
♪ And then you left, but now you know I'm utterly mad ♪
♪ And they're coming to take me away, ha-ha ♪
♪ They're coming to take me away, ho-ho ♪
[ Music distorts ]
♪ To the happy home ♪
[ Alan screams ]
[ Loud metal music playing ]
[ Metal music continues ]
ALAN: I don't believe that anybody
feels the way I do about you.
Exhaustion, panic attacks.
It's a breakdown, Ed.
Looks like the rock and roll
has finally caught up with me, eh?
ED: I'm gonna stay with you as long as it takes.
I need you to get me the fuck home.
I can't stay here. This place is evil.
Hey, how you doing?
Nice and cozy.
You're alright, mate.
Just some Valium.
You don't need that.
You know, a fear of flying
comes from the fear of not being in control,
and that's caused by the fear
of not feeling worthy of your position.
And that leads to all sorts of things,
like excessive drink, excessive drug-taking.
For fear of actually engaging in reality,
because in reality...
we're not in control.
That's why God
gave everyone an ego.
To feel like we're important enough,
to feel like we're in control.
[ Soothing music playing ]
That's pretty deep, Ed.
You've got so many people that love you, so many.
You're gonna get all the help you need.
I just want you to get better, Alan.
[ Susan sobs softly ]
[ Peppy music playing ]
GEMMA: Heck, this joint took some finding.
ALAN: Avoid Central London these days.
-How long are you in town? -GEMMA: Uh, four days.
I'm doing a piece on Bono with Rolling Stone.
-ALAN: Ouch! -It's been years.
Tell me about it. You're doing really well.
I read a lot of your stuff. That Lou Reed piece.
The memories of Michael Ronson piece.
You read that?
Hey, I heard that you had Bill Clinton
come and crash at your house.
He was looking for somewhere free to crash.
He's a tight cunt like me.
So, I think someone from the Labour Party hooked it up.
Oh, yeah, I wanted to ask you about that.
You'd taken some time off.
ALAN: Call it what it was.
It was a breakdown.
BMX BANDITS: ♪ She said maybe ♪
ALAN: Agraphobia.
Or agoraphobia, as the Americans call it,
which makes it sound like some kind of luxury wool.
No, it ain't woolly.
It's fear and dread.
It's all around you, and it's far away.
It's just fucking terrible.
I went to therapy, all that jazz.
Just get better.
Yeah, alright.
See you soon.
[ Door slams shut ]
[ Sighs ] Fuck.
Come in, come in.
Oh, no. No, no, no.
No, here.
Oh, sorry.
It's okay.
[ Chuckles ] Talk about predictable, eh?
WOMAN: I suppose I was feeling extremely pressured.
I mean, my parents are high-flyers, you know?
And I wanted them to be proud of my achievements.
All of the time, though.
Did you read the info on the Alcoholics Anonymous?
I'm with Groucho Marx.
I wouldn't want to join a cult that would have me as a member.
[ Laughs ]
They're not a cult.
I started self-medicating.
Prozac, Valium, beta-blockers.
Me too, but I was writing myself
prescriptions for ecstasy, speed, coke, acid, whiskey --
-almost every day. -[ Banging on door ]
I've been trying to contact you. Where you been?
I've got something here that'll liven you right up.
ALAN: If there's one thing dealers hate more
than not being paid, it's being paid.
You owe them, they've got the upper hand.
Pay off the debt, and they lose interest charges.
You don't have to settle the tab yet.
How much is the tab? How much?
ALAN: They're no different to bankers.
It's exactly the same transaction.
Thank you.
But Alan, you're my best customer.
There we go. There we go, alright?
All right, well, look,
give me the money for that next time.
ALAN: They just have a better product.
Oh, shit.
-[ Door creaks ] -That's Alan's dealer.
He's not in the kitchen, is he?
Where is he?
That was my dealer just 'round, eh?
Flushed it down the pan.
At least your ones were over the counter.
-[ Scoffs ] -Uh, well...
it's not important what type of crutches we all use.
See, what's important is getting to the root
of why we needed those crutches in the first place.
BLAIR: Education, education and education.
Susan's gone to meet a doctor.
He's got a clinic.
ALAN: Crutches?
Oasis were becoming the biggest band on the planet,
and here I was, a shivering mess.
It's like I was throwing the best party in the world,
but got shit-faced the night before
and was too hungover to join in.
Was I the ghost at the feast,
the mythical creator of this world,
hosting this party in my absence?
Truth is, no one gave a fuck.
The party just rolled on, whether I was there or not.
What the fuck?
I replaced it with cold tea.
You're a man.
It's up to you what you do with your life, son.
I don't want this to come across the wrong way, but...
Oh, go on.
Bottom line is...
it was fun.
-[ Upbeat music plays ] -Hmmm.
I was having a good time.
I could afford it.
The only person I was putting at risk was me.
If someone had said to me, "Hey, Alan,
all that shite is gonna fuck you up one day,"
well, truth is, I still would have done it.
And you know something?
If I wasn't such a fucking lightweight,
I wouldn't be sitting here right now,
in this circle of whatever.
I'd be out there, be out there with my mates,
right now.
If I had the constitution
of some of the rock stars I was looking after,
I'd still be out there, taking everything in sight.
Hey?
[ Music continues ]
It was exceedingly...dull.
It's just noise.
[ Mimicking instruments ]
Music does not exist in science.
Why is it some noise...
[ Shouting indistinctly ]
See, what you call something
completely changes perceptions of it.
You say "nervous breakdown," people think "funny farm",
but you say rehab, now you're cool.
I've got millions riding on a bunch of noises
that it's impossible to even quantify.
It's enough to make anybody absolutely crackers.
You're an industry casualty.
It's like membership to the "Terminal Fame Club
of Rock and Roll Fatality."
[ Mumbles ]
I can come back tomorrow, if you like?
No, I'm good. I'm good.
Everyone's asking about you.
Oh, yeah?
What did you tell them?
That you're ill.
ALAN: Just tell them the truth, Dick.
It's nothing to be ashamed of.
What, that you're in rehab?
Yeah.
It's pure rock and roll, isn't it?
Thank God for that.
I was running out of illnesses.
You know, I told The Guardian
that you was having an operation to remove piles.
Fuck off! What did you tell them that for?
Well, I had it done.
Could you not think of something a bit more sexy than piles?
Well, maybe we should tell them
that you're having plastic surgery on your penis.
Okay, tell the world I've got a tiny cock.
-How's that sexy?! -No, no, no, no, no.
You're gonna have a penis reduction.
Christ, Dick, just stick to the rehab story.
Keep my cock out of the press.
Okay.
This came for you as well, It's, um...
It's addressed to you personally.
ALAN: New Labour?
But it did get me off the rollercoaster for a while.
As soon as I got out, though, I knew I needed to reconnect.
I started going to see my bands again.
It felt strange watching them straight.
[ Music playing ]
I was still the same Alan.
Only now I was seeing things
that I would remember the next day,
and most of it...
Till the day you fucking die.
ALAN: ...wasn't worth remembering.
LIAM: Just gotta get in your own world, man,
You know what I mean, like, sort it out.
Everyone gets told they're worthless, you know what I mean.
Like, you've gotta prove it, ain't you?
Maybe one day they'll sit up and listen.
As you were, Alan.
What's he like, eh?
And I'd lost Joe.
Creation was becoming too corporate
for our in-house anarchist.
I think this is as much as Dick could squeeze out, you know.
I'm sure it's a fortune.
Please stay.
Nah, not for me.
Bloody rock and roll.
All them corporate tosspots.
-Been a blast, though. -Yeah.
♪ Here they come ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
Come on!
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ The part time punks ♪
♪ The part time punks! ♪
♪ Here they come!
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ The part time punks ♪
ALAN: And there he went,
the world's wealthiest anarchist.
And in true unconventional style,
went on to marry a midget.
You know what, Ed?
I just realized I don't know any of these people.
You resented Sony.
ALAN: No, it wasn't resentment.
It was more I'd given my favorite toy to the big boys.
Now I had nothing left to play with.
So, is that when you started getting into politics?
Well, they do say politics is rock and roll for the ugly.
I started hooking up with Malcolm McLaren.
Sex Pistols were my favorite band,
and I was in awe of him.
Ennui's a killer, Alan.
Everything I've done, the shop, the clothes,
the Sex Pistols, the opera, the hip-hop, the art,
was all a reaction against boredom.
Since man learned to harness fire,
and build shelter and clothe and feed himself,
boredom reared its ugly head.
All creativity, all culture is a reaction against boredom.
You've done hedonism, and you need to find something
to stop you from falling into that claustrophobic comfort.
We are alchemists...
of magical stuff.
We take boredom, and we weave it into a spectrum.
A gift that often bestows.
We are masters
of other people's destiny.
You've always voted Labour, right?
Mom always voted Labour.
What do you think about this Tony Blair dude?
I think he's giving them a real chance
of winning the election.
Did Noel agree with you?
[ Chuckles ] Noel's like me.
Good on him. Listen, we can help.
They fucking love us.
They want us to get involved.
You can't tell him what to do.
British music brought £8 billion into the...
But you can lay out the facts and trust that he'll do
exactly what you want him to do.
We represent all this cool Britannia bollocks.
They still didn't win the election.
But they will this time.
Obvious it's the right idea.
PRESENTER: And the winner is...
Oasis!
[ Crowd cheering ]
Politics isn't that much different from entertainment.
Seven people in this room tonight
will give a little bit of hope to young in this country.
That's me, our kid,
Bonehead, Guigsy, Alan White,
Alan McGee,
and Tony Blair.
And if you've all got anything about you,
you'll get up there and shake Tony Blair's hand, man.
Why, because it's like, uh...
It's like selling an idea, right?
Correct.
Packaging...
and selling.
[ Upbeat music plays ]
Ah, Alastair Campbell, Communications Director.
We spoke on the phone. And you are...Alan McGee.
Where's Tony?
ALASTAIR: Oh, Tony can't be with us, I'm afraid.
Have you met Peter Mandelson?
-Mandy! -Mmm-hmm.
We've got Peter to thank for the modernization
of the Labour Party.
The man is a political genius.
Peter, Alan McGee.
Oh, super!
Man of the hour. Ah!
Dying to meet you, Alan.
Can't tell you how much we appreciate your help.
[ Reporters shouting ]
Do you really think that it's a good idea
for pop stars to get involved in politics?
Do you think they can influence the future Labour government?
What's in it for you, McGee?
Well, we're all big fans of The Oasis and The Blur.
Blur aren't one of my bands.
It's all Britpop, isn't it?
-Spice Girls? -No.
-MAN: Silly. -[ Chuckles ] Thank you.
Sweet boy, saving me once again from humiliation.
Nothing in it for me.
I pay something called income tax on my earnings.
They're supposed to be spent helping people
less fortunate than me.
I just want to see others given a chance.
Not what I was expecting at all.
I'm sure.
I can't imagine any of this lot
on a picket line or a demonstration.
New Labour. Modernization.
Can you understand why some people might think
that this is a publicity stunt?
Some sort of hype?
Creation Records doesn't need any hype.
We look after the biggest band on the planet.
Alastair is going to want to talk to you
about the campaign song.
We're expecting great things.
FEMALE REPORTER: Does this mean that you might possibly stand
for election yourself one day?
-Me?! -I think Alan...
Are you taking the fucking piss?
[ Laughter ]
That's all the questions we're gonna answer right now.
-Alan's a very busy man. -[ Reporters clamoring ]
I genuinely believed in Tony Blair.
He was a man that wanted to progress the party
without scaring away the working classes.
D:REAM: ♪ In a different life ♪
♪ In a different light than I did before ♪
♪ And I've found the cause ♪
That's the campaign song he chose.
Mmm-hmm.
It's house music for people who hate house music.
Well, somebody in Peter's team
suggested that maybe Oasis could do a cover of it
for the campaign theme.
D:REAM: ♪ Things can only get better ♪
Let's face it, that's shite.
D:REAM: ♪ Can only get better now ♪
♪ Can only get better ♪
Under a Labour government,
things can only get better.
D:REAM: ♪ Things can only get better ♪
♪ Can only get better ♪
♪ Now I found you ♪
♪ Things can only get, can only get ♪
ALAN: We helped them win.
We were invited to the podium.
Everybody saw us on TV.
It was all part of the circus.
But then came the invite
to Chequers.
The very private country residence
of the incumbent prime minister.
Hello, hello.
ALAN: To walk in the footsteps of leaders and kings,
like Churchill, Eisenhower, Gorbachev.
Did you know Tony used to be in a band?
Yes, I heard about that.
Great thinkers and world leaders discussed means of peace
and laws for the betterment of mankind.
Now, Kate, come and let me show you around our little pad.
You'll love it. See you boys later.
ALAN: A wee ginger tool from Glasgow...
What a place you've got here, Tony.
Oh, it's a bit ostentatious for my taste,
but, yes, I suppose it is magnificent.
ALAN: ...in the court of kings.
We need to get started on this new deal
for unemployed musicians as soon as possible, please.
Right, yes, uh... Chris Smith's your man.
-He's not here. -JIMMY: Now then. Now then!
-[ Chuckles ] -TONY: Sir Jimmy.
Anthony, Anthony, Anthony, my dear boy.
-TONY: Ah! -JIMMY: Oh!
TONY: Oh, have you met Alan McGee?
JIMMY: I do not believe he has had the pleasure.
ALAN: Jimmy Savile.
Alright?
JIMMY: Um, Mr. Brit-pop, I presume.
ALAN: Everyone in music knew. Malcolm told me.
Johnny Rotten even said it on the BBC in the '70s.
JIMMY: Sir James...
ALAN: It's hard to believe all these royals
and politicians didn't know.
-[ Laughing ] -Excuse me.
JIMMY: Eh? Oh, yes. The little girl's room
is just across the hall, young lady.
You'll get used to the lie of the land,
over the course of the weekend.
CHERIE: Tony's band was called Ugly Rumour.
TONY BLAIR: That's right.
ALAN: Jimmy Savile,
one of the most prolific child rapists in history.
Did you see the way Blair was sucking up to him?
Oh, he makes my skin crawl.
You don't understand, that beast is the sickest cunt
in show business.
What have we done?
Try the chamomile tea. It's out of this world.
See, this decade, it started with a bang,
and ended with an explosion.
What we wrestled out of the hands
of the dullest cunts on earth...
got taken back, and they weren't losing it again.
Corporate disguised itself as hipster,
and indie...
just disappeared.
They were gonna do whatever they wanted,
no matter what the people thought.
GEMMA: My next guest on the couch
is music industry guru, kingpin,
and former head of Creation Records,
who brought us the likes of Primal Scream,
Jesus and Mary Chain, and, of course, Oasis.
He's political, occasionally controversial,
and he's a great friend.
He is, of course, Mr. Alan McGee.
PRODUCER: And roll VT.
ALAN: Beaming lights.
PRESENTER: Alan McGee, the man with a masterplan,
whose Creation Records went supersonic
by taking him from Brit Rail employee
to Britpop president.
But some might say he went
from rolling with it to rolling in it,
by selling his shares little by little to Sony
before collapsing the label.
-Did he slide away? -Whoa.
Wait a minute, whoa. Is this a stitch-up?
PRESENTER: Leaving the bands
all around the world without contracts.
-No. -What is your first question?
PRESENTER: One thing's for sure.
Creation Records didn't live forever, know what I mean?
Stop that racket.
You can edit it in afterwards. What's your first question?
Uh, what happened with Creation?
Why did you shut it down?
It was mine. I made it.
I folded it. No one got hurt.
Most of the bands got re-signed to Sony.
We didn't need Creation anymore.
Yeah, but why kill it?
-It doesn't make any sense. -Why not?
Look, I built the biggest independent record company
out of nothing.
I discovered and signed the world's biggest act
and reignited a record industry I was told was dying.
CD sales went up 800% between '89 and '99
with me on the charts, and overseas sales
made the UK more money than the motor industry.
My bands did that, and everyone else,
Pulp, Blur, Radiohead, benefited.
I got a whole country into E's and dance music.
And then I got them into coke and rock and roll.
And once I'd done that, I got political,
and went and put some of the biggest cunts
on God's green earth into government.
-Mandy Mandelson, what a tool. -[ Whispers ] He said cunt.
Tony Blair, they made out they cared about social justice,
when all they cared about was keeping hold of power
and lining their own pockets.
Who got them to make a new deal for the musicians?
I did, despite George Martin's objections.
That's government policy. I changed that.
Anyway, Blair had me ex-communicated,
because I tried to turn Malcolm McLaren
into Mayor of London.
Ex-communicated!
Who does he think he is, the bastard Pope?
See, you give them a little bit of power,
they lose all touch with reality.
Christ, look at me!
I lost it when I got a bit of power running a record label.
I know how those fuckers think.
Look, Gemma.
There is...
magic in this world.
OASIS: ♪ Hold up ♪
Some people
are alchemists.
OASIS: ♪ Hold up ♪
It chooses you.
You become able to make things happen because of it.
Able to manifest destiny.
OASIS: ♪ Don't be scared ♪
♪ You'll never change ♪
You see, if I'd fallen off of that ladder
when I was a kid,
this world wouldn't be the same.
Everyone I touched,
everyone I worked with...
OASIS: ♪ Shine on ♪
...gone on, been a success.
♪ Shine on ♪
Even you, Gem.
♪ Don't be scared ♪
Made millions.
OASIS: ♪ Don't be scared ♪
It's a Midas touch.
Excuse me if I'm...
wary of what I apply my skills to next.
That's a lot to take on board
for someone that hasn't been in your shoes.
But why don't you try and change the way
that you fit into your environment,
rather than try and change your environment?
I mean, friends, family.
Build a bridge.
Don't try and change the course of the river.
Hmm.
[ Scoffs ]
Yeah, you're right.
Listen, everybody. Sorry about that.
[ Scoffs ] I'm a tool.
Scrap that shite. Let's --
Let's go again from the beginning.
-Huh? -GEMMA: Really?
Roll VT. Did I say that right?
-PRODUCER: Roll VT. -Alright.
My guest on the couch is music industry guru, kingpin,
and former head of Creation Records...
ALAN: See, I don't really believe
it's about bridges or rivers.
It took me a long time to realize.
I see that thing you push against...
Dad!
Dad! Dad!
...that's the same thing
that's pushing you forward.
And it can sometimes be the wall
that's propping you up.
[ Singing off-key ] ♪ There are many things that ♪
♪ I would like to say to you ♪
♪ But I don't know how ♪
[ Oasis' "Wonderwall" plays ]
OASIS: ♪ I said maybe ♪
♪ You're gonna be the one that saves me ♪
♪ And after all ♪
♪ You're my wonderwall ♪
♪ I said maybe ♪
♪ You're gonna be the one that saves me ♪
ALAN: So be a punk,
be a poet, be political,
be posh, be proud,
or be poor.
But be a rebel always.
OASIS: ♪ You're my wonderwall ♪
ALAN: 'Cause there's always something to rebel for.
OASIS: ♪ I said maybe ♪
♪ You're gonna be the one that saves me ♪
♪ You're gonna be the one ♪
ALAN: Thank you, Glasgow. Goodnight.
♪ You're gonna be the one that saves me ♪
[ Glasvegas' "Shake The Cage (fur Theo)" plays ]
♪ Start ♪
♪ Breathe ♪
♪ Hatch ♪
♪ Begin ♪
♪ See ♪
♪ Dream ♪
♪ Come ♪
♪ Go ♪
♪ Appear ♪
♪ Disappear ♪
♪ Reappear ♪
♪ Remember the future ♪
♪ Predict the present ♪
♪ Guess, win ♪
♪ Guess, lose ♪
♪ Guess more ♪
♪ Guess lest ♪
♪ Rev, rev, rev, say yes ♪
♪ Observe ♪
♪ Understand ♪
♪ Look ♪
♪ Lock, snap ♪
♪ Hang photographs ♪
♪ Crawl ♪
♪ Rise ♪
♪ Cry ♪
♪ Stand ♪
♪ Step ♪
♪ Step-fall ♪
♪ Cry ♪
♪ Laugh ♪
♪ Cry with laughter ♪
♪ Stand alone ♪
♪ Run ♪
♪ Speed ♪
♪ Race ♪
♪ Fall ♪
♪ Forget ♪
♪ Bleed ♪
♪ Read ♪
♪ Heal ♪
♪ Need ♪
♪ Imagine ♪
♪ Help ♪
♪ Wear trousers under a skirt ♪
♪ Travel ♪
♪ Unravel ♪
♪ Eclipse your world ♪
♪ Collect ♪
♪ Reflect ♪
♪ Expect ♪
♪ Release ♪
♪ Disconnect ♪
♪ Perfect ♪
♪ Play ♪
♪ Speak ♪
♪ Sting ♪
♪ Bleed ♪
♪ Tear ♪
♪ Smash ♪
♪ Break ♪
♪ Admire ♪
♪ Regret ♪
♪ Romanticize ♪
♪ Criticize ♪
♪ Fantasize ♪
♪ Crucify ♪
♪ Watch time fly by ♪
♪ Wonder why ♪
♪ Hardly try ♪
♪ Propel high ♪
♪ Tighten ♪
♪ Enlighten ♪
♪ Feel threatened ♪
♪ Dance ♪
♪ Doubt ♪
♪ Dance ♪
♪ Enchant ♪
♪ Spread love ♪
♪ Speak above ♪
♪ Stand on a wave ♪
♪ Calculate quantum mechanics ♪
♪ Surf ♪
♪ Dance ♪
♪ Believe in trance ♪
♪ Escape ♪
♪ Make love ♪
♪ Not war ♪
♪ Stand up for ♪
♪ Fly a kite ♪
♪ And speak the light ♪
♪ Hold on tight ♪
♪ Never give up the fight ♪
♪ Trip ♪
♪ Be inappropriate ♪
♪ Stay there ♪
♪ Transmit ♪
♪ Commit ♪
♪ Be fully wrong ♪
♪ Rise ♪
♪ Brave ♪
♪ Keep the faith ♪
♪ Explain ♪
♪ Remain the same ♪
♪ Evolve again ♪
♪ Philosophize ♪
♪ Surprise ♪
♪ Teach me how ♪
♪ Roll dice ♪
♪ Radiate ♪
♪ Investigate ♪
♪ Single-handedly move God's airwaves ♪
♪ Help hurt ♪
♪ Help help ♪
♪ Help hate ♪
♪ Her love ♪
♪ Help hurt ♪
♪ Disturb ♪
♪ Operate ♪
♪ Don't do ♪
♪ Do ♪
♪ Don't ♪
♪ Accept ♪
♪ Struggle ♪
♪ Produce ♪
♪ Experiment ♪
♪ Break on through ♪
♪ Alter ♪
♪ Give-get-get ♪
♪ Offer ♪
[ Music fades ]