1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,883 ‪NETFLIX 喜剧特辑 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:08,967 --> 00:00:11,302 ‪你知道观众其实都是演员吗？ 5 00:00:11,386 --> 00:00:12,762 ‪不可能 6 00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,014 ‪-是 ‪-难以置信 7 00:00:14,097 --> 00:00:15,306 ‪尼克 吃个煎蛋吗？ 8 00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:17,809 ‪不用了 我吃这个阿卡伊浆果碗就好 9 00:00:17,892 --> 00:00:21,604 ‪天然抗氧化 还很好吃 10 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,481 ‪看看好莱坞巨星的生活方式 11 00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:27,026 ‪格温妮斯帕特洛刚打电话 ‪说你要赶不上蒸阴道了 12 00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:29,738 ‪哈哈 笑话不错 13 00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:32,574 ‪顺便提醒一下 尼克 ‪那个读作“阿萨伊”浆果 14 00:00:33,241 --> 00:00:34,617 ‪不是的 15 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:36,786 ‪绝对不是 就是“阿卡伊” 16 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:40,999 ‪其实我觉得你吃的是藜麦 17 00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:42,500 ‪哥们 你说什么呢？ 18 00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:44,210 ‪是阿卡伊浆果 19 00:00:44,294 --> 00:00:45,754 ‪-阿卡伊？ ‪-阿卡伊 20 00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:46,671 ‪-是藜麦 ‪-我们能别争了吗？ 21 00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:48,381 ‪天哪 你好难闻 22 00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:50,842 ‪你们知道吗？我们不应该这么吵 23 00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,678 ‪我们都是成年人了 ‪我们不应该吵... 24 00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:57,140 ‪他刚朝我脸扔了薄煎饼？ 25 00:00:57,223 --> 00:00:58,391 ‪他刚朝你脸扔了薄煎饼 26 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:06,941 ‪接招！ 27 00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:14,365 ‪嘿 28 00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,076 ‪好了 兄弟们 29 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,036 ‪你们想打？ 30 00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:20,413 ‪咱们去地下室 31 00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:23,792 ‪先生们 欢迎来到 ‪乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部 32 00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:26,753 ‪乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部 ‪有几条规则 33 00:01:26,836 --> 00:01:29,172 ‪乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部的第一条规则 34 00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:31,466 ‪我们不谈论乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部 35 00:01:31,549 --> 00:01:33,635 ‪乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部的 ‪第二条规则... 36 00:01:33,718 --> 00:01:34,803 ‪嗨 宝贝 37 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:37,305 ‪不 我在乔纳斯兄弟搏击俱乐部里 38 00:01:38,515 --> 00:01:39,974 ‪很快 我们在我的地下室里 39 00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:42,769 ‪都是秘密规则 40 00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:44,312 ‪-哥们 ‪-什么？ 41 00:01:44,395 --> 00:01:45,939 ‪秘密规则 42 00:01:47,482 --> 00:01:49,192 ‪-哦 规则... ‪-是 43 00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:52,570 ‪我再打回给你 爱你 再见 44 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:54,572 ‪好吧 抱歉 你刚说什么？ 45 00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:57,242 ‪孩子们！你们最好别在地下室里胡闹 46 00:01:57,325 --> 00:01:59,410 ‪又搞愚蠢的搏击俱乐部 47 00:01:59,494 --> 00:02:00,578 ‪-没有 ‪-我们没搞 48 00:02:00,662 --> 00:02:02,163 ‪-从没搞过 ‪-我们只是... 49 00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:03,248 ‪我们一起看黄片呢 50 00:02:03,331 --> 00:02:06,126 ‪什么？你简直口不择言 51 00:02:06,209 --> 00:02:08,253 ‪-这小子 ‪-对 52 00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:10,463 ‪第三条也是最重要的规则 不要打脸 53 00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:11,464 ‪我们太帅了 54 00:02:11,548 --> 00:02:12,382 ‪-当然 ‪-是 55 00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:14,926 ‪-看见这张脸了吗？ ‪-好了 56 00:02:15,009 --> 00:02:16,386 ‪-咱们来吧 ‪-来吧 57 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,767 ‪等等 我们在干什么？ 58 00:02:23,768 --> 00:02:25,061 ‪我们是兄弟 59 00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,771 ‪兄弟不该这么做 60 00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:28,690 ‪他们应该... 61 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,734 ‪洛基 你为什么要这么做？ 62 00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:34,112 ‪洛基 你为什么要这么做？ 63 00:02:34,195 --> 00:02:36,072 ‪-你不是索尔 ‪-我当然是索尔 64 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,032 ‪哦 你以为我要当洛基 65 00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:40,618 ‪我觉得很明显这家谁是洛基 66 00:02:40,702 --> 00:02:43,329 ‪洛基 你为什么要这么做？ 67 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,498 ‪拜托 凯文 你认真的吗？ 68 00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,083 ‪朋友们 我很英勇 69 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:49,502 ‪你没看到我在 ‪《嫁给乔纳斯》第二季中 70 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,421 ‪如何应对丹妮妹妹毕业的吗？ 71 00:02:51,504 --> 00:02:53,673 ‪等等 那破玩意竟然拍了两季？ 72 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:55,800 ‪住手！ 73 00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:57,760 ‪咱们来妥善处理这个局面 74 00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,555 ‪你当然会把我们带到《摇滚夏令营》 75 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:03,766 ‪你当主角的一部 ‪真电影真是展现出了老二的特征 76 00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:07,186 ‪-真渴望关注 ‪-我能说什么？ 77 00:03:08,062 --> 00:03:09,314 ‪摄像机爱我 78 00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:10,440 ‪我们能专心点吗？ 79 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:14,277 ‪朋友们 我希望咱们回到这里 ‪是因为在这里我们能心连心 80 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:16,529 ‪在这里我们作为 81 00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:18,156 ‪乐队伙伴和兄弟能获得治愈 82 00:03:18,823 --> 00:03:21,117 ‪还能登上舞台好好摇滚一把 83 00:03:21,701 --> 00:03:25,997 ‪你们怎么想？咱们出去 ‪摇滚这个夏令营！ 84 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:27,248 ‪好！ 85 00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:28,625 ‪我真为我们骄傲 86 00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:31,753 ‪我觉得我们都能进一步体会 ‪什么是兄弟之爱 87 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:34,380 ‪我去买杯咖啡 你们想要什么吗？ 88 00:03:34,464 --> 00:03:37,091 ‪-我来杯特浓 ‪-你想说的应该是浓缩 89 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:41,554 ‪我要摧毁你 快于... 90 00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,766 ‪你个人专辑卖出去的速度 91 00:03:44,849 --> 00:03:45,725 ‪说得好 92 00:03:46,768 --> 00:03:49,229 ‪别以为我没看出你外表下的内心 93 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:50,563 ‪伪装的乔纳斯 94 00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,607 ‪你这种眉毛下还能看出东西来？ 95 00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:57,278 ‪朋友们！ 96 00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:59,697 ‪我有个更好的办法 ‪帮你们把怒气发泄出去 97 00:04:01,991 --> 00:04:06,162 ‪欢迎主持人基南汤普森！ 98 00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:11,668 ‪你们好 99 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,419 ‪太好了 100 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,422 ‪大家好吗？ 101 00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:20,802 ‪大家晚上好 ‪先生 你好 很高兴见到你 102 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:24,347 ‪很高兴见到你 都坐吧 太隆重了 103 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:25,556 ‪非常感谢 104 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:29,018 ‪欢迎来到乔纳斯兄弟吐槽大会 105 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:31,145 ‪我是你们的主持人基南汤普森 106 00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:32,772 ‪非常感谢 107 00:04:34,565 --> 00:04:37,568 ‪女士们先生们 乔纳斯兄弟就在现场 108 00:04:38,319 --> 00:04:39,362 ‪没错 109 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,155 ‪没错 110 00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:44,534 ‪今晚会登台吐槽的有皮特戴维森 111 00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:47,537 ‪莉莉辛格 112 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,165 ‪杰克怀特霍尔 113 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:52,500 ‪约翰传奇 114 00:04:53,751 --> 00:04:55,003 ‪奈尔霍兰 115 00:04:55,586 --> 00:04:57,797 ‪蓬松哥加布里埃尔·伊格莱西亚斯 116 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:02,176 ‪这是家庭活动 117 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:06,556 ‪当然兄弟们的另一半也会到场 118 00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:12,186 ‪丹妮尔乔纳斯 索菲特纳 ‪和朴雅卡乔普拉乔纳斯 119 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:15,106 ‪很荣幸请到大家 120 00:05:15,189 --> 00:05:17,150 ‪我们开始吧 121 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,986 ‪没有吐槽对象可开不成吐槽大会 122 00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:24,949 ‪请大家鼓掌欢迎凯文、乔和尼克 123 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:28,453 ‪也就是乔纳斯兄弟！ 124 00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:46,262 ‪就是他们 125 00:05:46,804 --> 00:05:47,972 ‪就是他们 126 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:49,974 ‪就是他们 127 00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:53,686 ‪好了 128 00:05:54,812 --> 00:05:56,856 ‪朋友们 你们感觉如何？ 129 00:05:56,939 --> 00:05:58,775 ‪你们期待今晚还是怎样？ 130 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,027 ‪我们挺紧张的 基南 就这么回事 131 00:06:01,110 --> 00:06:04,530 ‪但我相信有你主持 今晚会有趣 132 00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:07,366 ‪加上这么棒的观众 ‪我们会过得很愉快！ 133 00:06:07,950 --> 00:06:09,077 ‪大家玩起来吧！ 134 00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:13,164 ‪有很多可紧张的 你们抽大麻吗？ 135 00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:15,833 ‪抽啊 我现在嗨得不行 136 00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:17,668 ‪太好了！ 137 00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:18,961 ‪越来越真实了 138 00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,546 ‪好吧 那... 139 00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:24,425 ‪今晚我将做你们的向导 ‪介绍乔纳斯兄弟的一切 140 00:06:24,509 --> 00:06:27,720 ‪下面介绍乔纳斯兄弟的基础知识 141 00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:29,097 ‪咱们看一下 142 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,348 ‪好耶 143 00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:32,391 ‪好了 144 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:36,729 ‪乔纳斯兄弟成长于新泽西州维考夫 145 00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:40,274 ‪-耶！ ‪-他们成了有史以来 146 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:43,486 ‪出自新泽西的最伟大音乐人 147 00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,073 ‪除了弗兰克辛纳特拉 148 00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:49,617 ‪或者除了布鲁斯斯普林斯汀 149 00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:51,744 ‪或者惠特尼休斯顿 150 00:06:52,954 --> 00:06:55,790 ‪或者法兰基维里 奎恩拉提法 ‪萝伦希尔 乔治克莱顿约翰逊 151 00:06:55,873 --> 00:06:57,166 ‪库尔伙伴合唱团 邦乔维 152 00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:00,461 ‪但在这些人之后 153 00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:03,381 ‪新泽西只剩你们了 ‪明白我在说什么吗？ 154 00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:04,841 ‪我喜欢 代表新泽西 155 00:07:05,716 --> 00:07:07,969 ‪-我们做到了 ‪-我们做到了 156 00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:09,762 ‪在乔纳斯兄弟很小时 157 00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:13,266 ‪他们亲爱的父母就鼓励他们 ‪投身自己热爱的音乐 158 00:07:13,349 --> 00:07:16,811 ‪也就是老凯文乔纳斯和丹尼斯乔纳斯 159 00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:19,605 ‪老凯文今晚也来到了现场 160 00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:23,568 ‪但丹尼斯今晚不能来 161 00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:26,362 ‪因为她有贾斯汀比伯演唱会的票 162 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,531 ‪我们都知道你不能放弃这种票 163 00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:30,116 ‪好吧 164 00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:31,534 ‪看他们一家 165 00:07:33,369 --> 00:07:38,124 ‪最前面的这个小孩是 ‪这家最小的弟弟富兰克林 166 00:07:38,207 --> 00:07:39,333 ‪好耶 167 00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:46,048 ‪我被严格要求不能叫他 ‪“额外的乔纳斯” 168 00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,342 ‪他今晚没来 169 00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:50,720 ‪所以我就叫他 ‪“这家不认的乔纳斯” 170 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,556 ‪那时候 171 00:07:53,639 --> 00:07:56,309 ‪乔纳斯兄弟驾驭各种狂野造型 172 00:07:56,392 --> 00:07:59,353 ‪没人有任何意见 ‪他们当时就这么有名 173 00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:01,063 ‪看看当时的造型有多扯 174 00:08:03,774 --> 00:08:04,692 ‪尼克 175 00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:07,069 ‪那帽子怎么回事？ 176 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,237 ‪我不知道 177 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:11,449 ‪你看起来像 ‪枪花Slash的奇怪继子 178 00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:18,539 ‪不知怎么的 数不清的窄领带 179 00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:21,209 ‪马甲、装饰围巾 180 00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:25,254 ‪都没能让我们不注意他们的绝美头发 181 00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:27,423 ‪是啊 182 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:29,634 ‪这个牛 183 00:08:30,134 --> 00:08:31,219 ‪天哪 184 00:08:31,302 --> 00:08:32,345 ‪你们瞧瞧 185 00:08:33,137 --> 00:08:34,263 ‪我佩服他们 186 00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:37,683 ‪这些是我见过的最真实的头发卷之一 187 00:08:39,101 --> 00:08:41,771 ‪每个兄弟都有自己的特点 188 00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:44,815 ‪首先看看最孤独的乔纳斯 189 00:08:45,608 --> 00:08:46,859 ‪凯文 190 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:48,736 ‪（当你去见朋友时） 191 00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,404 ‪（你是第一个到的） 192 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:52,782 ‪有多孤独？ 193 00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:56,827 ‪孤独到这个表情包 ‪被分享了成千上万次 194 00:08:57,870 --> 00:09:00,164 ‪当你去见朋友时 195 00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:02,124 ‪你是第一个到的 196 00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,418 ‪凯文 没事 197 00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:05,586 ‪常言道 198 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:08,214 ‪天命真女这样的组合中 ‪总得有米歇尔威廉姆斯 199 00:09:08,297 --> 00:09:10,216 ‪没错 200 00:09:10,299 --> 00:09:12,176 ‪这是吐槽 朋友们 201 00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:13,761 ‪我们会吐槽得越来越恨 202 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:16,639 ‪行了 203 00:09:16,722 --> 00:09:22,103 ‪下面是乔乔纳斯 ‪他是乔纳斯兄弟中的米特罗姆尼 204 00:09:22,186 --> 00:09:23,813 ‪米特罗姆... 205 00:09:25,523 --> 00:09:28,901 ‪他看起来就像 ‪一杯牛奶活了过来 这... 206 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:30,987 ‪我喜欢 207 00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:33,531 ‪一个有趣的故事 乔曾在采访中说 208 00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:37,326 ‪他最爱的网站是YouTube 209 00:09:38,202 --> 00:09:41,330 ‪真是在信息前沿 乔 好了 210 00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:45,126 ‪当然还有乐队中的小弟弟 211 00:09:45,209 --> 00:09:47,878 ‪其实是“大弟弟”尼克乔纳斯 212 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,301 ‪他什么都行 213 00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:55,386 ‪好歌手 好演员 214 00:09:55,469 --> 00:09:58,431 ‪你基本上不能怪他 ‪在2013年解散乐队 215 00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:02,810 ‪因为他觉得 ‪他比其他人都棒 我们理解 216 00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:09,483 ‪但好在2019年乔纳斯乐队重组了 217 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,193 ‪他们现在表现更好了 218 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:13,696 ‪前所未有地好 219 00:10:14,655 --> 00:10:16,073 ‪他们现在前所未有地好 220 00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:19,452 ‪而丹妮尔、索菲和朴雅卡 221 00:10:19,535 --> 00:10:23,039 ‪谢谢你们让我们的男孩 ‪成长为我们今天看到的男人 222 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:30,087 ‪说真的 223 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:34,425 ‪要有很了不起的本事 ‪才能在世界各地永远亿万粉丝 224 00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:38,596 ‪尤其了不起的是 ‪能维持这种状态超过15年 225 00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:41,140 ‪-向你们致敬 ‪-谢谢 226 00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:44,685 ‪向你们致敬！ 227 00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:49,440 ‪我保证有一天我也会 ‪记起你们其中一首歌的 228 00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:54,111 ‪现在我们都对乔纳斯兄弟 ‪有了基础了解 229 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:55,696 ‪那干吗不开始呢？ 230 00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:57,239 ‪你可能会很惊讶 231 00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:59,867 ‪乔纳斯兄弟还有朋友 232 00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:02,745 ‪我们很激动请出其中之一 233 00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:06,123 ‪女士们先生们 精彩的莉莉辛格！ 234 00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:21,055 ‪谢谢大家... 235 00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:22,807 ‪谢谢！ 236 00:11:24,892 --> 00:11:29,688 ‪很荣幸参加乔纳斯兄弟吐槽大会 237 00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:31,148 ‪好耶 238 00:11:32,149 --> 00:11:34,443 ‪老实说 239 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,320 ‪我已经觉得自己是这家一员了 240 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:40,116 ‪因为尼克和朴雅卡结婚时 ‪凯文和乔对我说 241 00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,451 ‪“我们特高兴 ‪你和我们的弟弟尼克结婚” 242 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:48,332 ‪如果你不认识我 完全合理 243 00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,543 ‪我是莉莉辛格 你们好吗？ 244 00:11:50,626 --> 00:11:51,544 ‪谢谢 245 00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:54,422 ‪我太爱乔纳斯兄弟了 246 00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:56,465 ‪以致于我今天打扮得 ‪像凯文乔纳斯一样 247 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,636 ‪正如你们所见 我们都 ‪在Forever 21买衣服 248 00:12:03,013 --> 00:12:06,267 ‪我是在Youtube上 ‪做喜剧视频起家的 249 00:12:06,350 --> 00:12:09,353 ‪从那时开始 ‪在一个仍由白人男性主导的行业中 250 00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:13,107 ‪我经历了事业的高低起伏 251 00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:17,027 ‪所以我很激动终于可以 ‪上Netflix的喜剧特辑 252 00:12:17,111 --> 00:12:19,697 ‪来庆祝三个来自新泽西的白人男子！ 253 00:12:21,949 --> 00:12:26,162 ‪乔纳斯兄弟太白太简单了 254 00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:29,498 ‪就跟低度汽水酒一样 255 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:35,212 ‪乔太白了 给自己的乐队起名时 256 00:12:35,296 --> 00:12:37,047 ‪“dance”都能少写一个a 257 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:43,679 ‪我还是个小女孩时 ‪确实喜欢过乔纳斯兄弟 258 00:12:43,762 --> 00:12:45,639 ‪我的墙上贴了他们的海报 259 00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:47,183 ‪拜托 他们那时帅吧？ 260 00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:48,309 ‪没错！ 261 00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:52,146 ‪他们当时帮我了解到 ‪我到底是个什么样的人 262 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:55,691 ‪我永远不会忘记 ‪当我在加拿大 还是个小女孩时 263 00:12:55,774 --> 00:12:57,818 ‪盯着乔纳斯兄弟的照片 想到 264 00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:00,154 ‪“我可能喜欢女孩” 265 00:13:05,951 --> 00:13:07,203 ‪太有意思了！ 266 00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:12,833 ‪不过太疯狂了 乔纳斯兄弟 ‪现在快30岁或者过了30岁 267 00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:17,004 ‪但他们脸上的毛发还是都不如我多 268 00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:19,381 ‪没错 我这个特长很奇怪 269 00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,050 ‪我知道我的特长和弱点 好吗？ 270 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:25,095 ‪说到弱点 凯文在这儿！ 271 00:13:28,098 --> 00:13:31,435 ‪凯文 说真的 ‪乔纳斯兄弟中我最喜欢他 272 00:13:31,519 --> 00:13:32,478 ‪确实 273 00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:34,605 ‪我也最喜欢他 274 00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:39,985 ‪因为他让我相信任何人 ‪都能当流行明星 275 00:13:40,444 --> 00:13:43,614 ‪当你看到照片中他在尼克和乔身旁时 276 00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:45,199 ‪你总会想 277 00:13:45,282 --> 00:13:48,452 ‪“哇 尼克和乔 ‪跟他们的会计关系真好” 278 00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,331 ‪现在该说尼克了 279 00:13:52,414 --> 00:13:54,416 ‪你永远是乔纳斯兄弟中的小宝贝 280 00:13:54,917 --> 00:13:56,669 ‪-当然 ‪-我不知道大家是否知道 281 00:13:56,752 --> 00:13:58,963 ‪他似乎永远对女人没兴趣 282 00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:01,173 ‪所以他娶了一个作掩护 283 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:03,425 ‪噢 284 00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:05,761 ‪靠 285 00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:12,184 ‪但很难不爱尼克乔纳斯 对吧？ ‪看看他的帅样 286 00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:15,479 ‪是啊 287 00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,899 ‪尼克是坚定不移的梦想家 288 00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:20,526 ‪他想做最好 289 00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:25,114 ‪尼克希望有朝一日获得 ‪格莱美、艾美、奥斯卡和托尼奖 290 00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:26,824 ‪他会的 291 00:14:26,907 --> 00:14:31,036 ‪如果他再领养四条狗 并把它们 ‪命名为格莱美、艾美、奥斯卡和托尼 292 00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:36,250 ‪嗨 乔 293 00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:40,421 ‪-我没忘了你 ‪-谢天谢地 294 00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:43,340 ‪2008到2015年期间 ‪我确实忘了 但今晚没忘 295 00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:49,513 ‪但我衷心地说 今晚很荣幸来到这里 296 00:14:49,597 --> 00:14:51,599 ‪参加你们的吐槽大会 297 00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:52,808 ‪非常感谢你们邀请我 298 00:14:54,059 --> 00:14:57,229 ‪显然我特喜欢 299 00:14:57,771 --> 00:14:58,814 ‪基南汤普森 300 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,316 ‪非常感谢 大家晚安！ 301 00:15:00,816 --> 00:15:01,775 ‪好耶 302 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:04,361 ‪-朋友们 莉莉辛格 ‪-谢谢 303 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,156 ‪表现得很好 304 00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:08,157 ‪-好耶 ‪-非常感谢 305 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,325 ‪非常好 给她鼓掌！ 306 00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:13,746 ‪她把你们都骂了 307 00:15:13,829 --> 00:15:15,539 ‪-我喜欢！ ‪-你们很有体育精神 308 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:17,374 ‪老爸 你感觉如何？你还挺得住吗？ 309 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:18,626 ‪我知道这些是你的孩子 310 00:15:18,709 --> 00:15:20,169 ‪-我的孩子 ‪-我听见了 311 00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:21,128 ‪好吧 312 00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:23,088 ‪“我的孩子” 313 00:15:23,172 --> 00:15:26,508 ‪关于乔纳斯兄弟 314 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:27,760 ‪你可能还有所不知 315 00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:31,263 ‪在2007年的 ‪梅西百货感恩节大游行中 316 00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:34,725 ‪坐在了熊熊工作室的花车上 317 00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:35,726 ‪很好 318 00:15:36,393 --> 00:15:37,770 ‪-很厉害 ‪-然后 319 00:15:37,853 --> 00:15:39,980 ‪游行结束后 他们利用 320 00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:42,107 ‪凯文的鬓角造出了只熊 321 00:15:43,901 --> 00:15:45,277 ‪嘘！ 322 00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:46,695 ‪嘘！ 323 00:15:47,404 --> 00:15:49,782 ‪抱歉 什么？有人刚嘘我了？ 324 00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:50,950 ‪嘘！ 325 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:54,662 ‪太粗鲁了 你们可能不会信 326 00:15:55,162 --> 00:15:59,208 ‪但乔纳斯兄弟 ‪作为最年轻的乐队登上了... 327 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:01,210 ‪-滚... ‪-《滚石》的封面 328 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,169 ‪我们知道！ 329 00:16:04,338 --> 00:16:06,340 ‪皮特？是你吗？ 330 00:16:06,423 --> 00:16:07,341 ‪是我吗？ 331 00:16:07,841 --> 00:16:08,717 ‪皮特戴维森 332 00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:11,387 ‪对 333 00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:15,224 ‪这就像在问乔纳斯兄弟牛不牛 334 00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:16,392 ‪当然牛了 哥们！ 335 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:18,686 ‪你在这儿干吗？ 336 00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:21,188 ‪我不知道 我太醉了 337 00:16:22,189 --> 00:16:24,900 ‪我刚和奈尔喝了低度汽水‪酒 ‪那孩子挺酷 338 00:16:25,776 --> 00:16:27,444 ‪所以你是他们的粉丝 339 00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:28,946 ‪我是超级粉丝！ 340 00:16:29,029 --> 00:16:32,408 ‪每次在超市里 我都听乔纳斯兄弟 341 00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,370 ‪给他们点尊重 好吗？ 342 00:16:36,453 --> 00:16:38,080 ‪尼克现在是正式的演员了 343 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:40,582 ‪从儿童选择奖到青少年选择奖 344 00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,292 ‪他赢得了一切 345 00:16:44,044 --> 00:16:44,962 ‪是 346 00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:46,547 ‪-很好 ‪-谢谢 347 00:16:46,630 --> 00:16:49,174 ‪尼克有首热单叫《嫉妒》 348 00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:52,469 ‪尽管凯文唱出来会可信得多 349 00:16:56,473 --> 00:16:59,393 ‪你们难道没听过那首《过山车》？ 350 00:16:59,476 --> 00:17:01,770 ‪你知道写一个 ‪自己都不够高去坐的玩意 351 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,480 ‪有多勇敢吗？ 352 00:17:05,441 --> 00:17:07,484 ‪我怎么能拿这些人找乐呢？ 353 00:17:07,568 --> 00:17:11,030 ‪如果他们的妈妈像他们的姐姐的话 ‪那我也像他们 354 00:17:12,781 --> 00:17:16,035 ‪不好意思 但我们得让节目继续 355 00:17:16,118 --> 00:17:17,870 ‪拜托别再打断节目了 356 00:17:17,953 --> 00:17:19,163 ‪-好吗？ ‪-好 357 00:17:19,246 --> 00:17:20,164 ‪-谢谢 ‪-好 358 00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:25,919 ‪乔纳斯兄弟已经在白宫表演过 359 00:17:26,003 --> 00:17:26,962 ‪几次了 360 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:31,008 ‪但最值得注意的是 ‪他们为了推广女子乐乐棒球 361 00:17:31,091 --> 00:17:33,844 ‪唱国歌那次 362 00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:39,266 ‪这项运动有个更常用的名字 ‪等等 真有这项运动吗？ 363 00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:42,853 ‪行了 你太过分了 好吗？ 364 00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:45,355 ‪这些人很棒！好吗？ 365 00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:48,442 ‪《再长一点》是他们的专辑中 ‪我最喜欢的... 366 00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:50,903 ‪没错 367 00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,282 ‪也是索菲对乔阴茎的希望 368 00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:56,992 ‪悠着点！ 369 00:17:57,743 --> 00:18:00,412 ‪凛冬将至 但索菲的高潮还没到 370 00:18:00,496 --> 00:18:01,747 ‪-皮特！ ‪-干吗？ 371 00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:05,209 ‪-你不能这么说话 ‪-拜托！ 372 00:18:06,293 --> 00:18:08,212 ‪出去 你不能这么说...出... 373 00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:09,630 ‪-抱歉 ‪-把皮特请走 374 00:18:09,713 --> 00:18:11,507 ‪-抱歉 ‪-朋友们 皮特戴维森 375 00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,092 ‪但你得出去 376 00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:15,969 ‪天哪 377 00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:18,931 ‪索菲 那是你的私事 378 00:18:22,142 --> 00:18:24,812 ‪下面欢迎更有才华 更美丽 379 00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:28,357 ‪更受欢迎 更开心的 380 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,652 ‪尼克乔纳斯妻子 ‪朴雅卡乔普拉乔纳斯 381 00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:41,370 ‪好耶 382 00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:42,579 ‪现在好害怕 383 00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:44,873 ‪但谢谢你们创造出了 ‪如此温暖的氛围！ 384 00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:46,041 ‪太棒了！ 385 00:18:46,583 --> 00:18:47,960 ‪大家好！ 386 00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:55,467 ‪我很荣幸 很激动 也很开心 387 00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:59,847 ‪今晚来此吐槽我的丈夫尼克乔纳斯 388 00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:04,184 ‪还有他那些我记不住名字的兄弟 389 00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:10,566 ‪我来自印度 这个国家有丰富的文化 390 00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:12,151 ‪音乐和娱乐 391 00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:14,903 ‪显然乔纳斯兄弟没打入印度 392 00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:21,660 ‪尼克和我有十岁的年龄差 393 00:19:21,743 --> 00:19:23,120 ‪-耶！ ‪-是的 394 00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:25,330 ‪确实差了十岁 395 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:29,960 ‪许多90年代流行文化典故他不了解 396 00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:31,253 ‪我得跟他解释 397 00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:33,922 ‪没关系 因为我们互相教导 398 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,591 ‪我们互相教导 399 00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:38,552 ‪比如他告诉我怎么用抖音 400 00:19:39,303 --> 00:19:43,098 ‪我告诉他成功的演员生涯是什么样的 401 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:44,474 ‪靠！ 402 00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:55,444 ‪天哪 403 00:19:56,153 --> 00:19:57,404 ‪还有 你们注意过没有 404 00:19:57,487 --> 00:19:59,740 ‪乔纳斯兄弟在网上发了多少内容？ 405 00:19:59,823 --> 00:20:03,869 ‪他们好像永远 ‪在Instagram 在电话上 406 00:20:03,952 --> 00:20:05,329 ‪真可爱 407 00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:07,706 ‪我来告诉你们为什么 408 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:11,543 ‪因为他们所有人加起来的粉丝 ‪还没我一个人多 409 00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:15,672 ‪是的 410 00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:16,590 ‪是真的 411 00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:20,469 ‪-是真的 ‪-所以我猜乔纳斯家最红的 412 00:20:20,552 --> 00:20:22,346 ‪是Instagram上的 ‪@PriyankaChopra 413 00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:31,146 ‪不过说真的 我确实想聊聊 ‪我有多爱我丈夫 414 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,482 ‪以及我爱他什么 415 00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:36,860 ‪我爱我丈夫的一点是 ‪我们有很多共同点 416 00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:39,905 ‪比如我们都完全 417 00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:43,408 ‪痴迷尼克乔纳斯 418 00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:46,370 ‪我们爱尼克乔纳斯 419 00:20:46,453 --> 00:20:48,705 ‪我们俩都爱 他是我们的最爱 420 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:49,623 ‪真的 421 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:51,917 ‪-他是我们的最爱 ‪-没错 422 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,085 ‪-没错 ‪-千真万确 423 00:20:53,168 --> 00:20:55,545 ‪我不想嫁给其他任何人 424 00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:59,216 ‪我是认真的 ‪除非克里斯海姆斯沃斯突然单身了 425 00:20:59,299 --> 00:21:00,342 ‪我可能会改变想法 426 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:04,012 ‪自从我们结婚 ‪人们就质疑我们的婚姻 427 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:07,015 ‪是吧？人们说：“不过是炒作做秀” 428 00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,267 ‪怎么可能？ 429 00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:10,852 ‪我当时甚至不知道尼克多有名 430 00:21:10,936 --> 00:21:14,898 ‪我只知道他是凯文乔纳斯的小弟弟 431 00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:18,068 ‪真的 432 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:23,073 ‪完全是真的 我愿意嫁给 433 00:21:23,156 --> 00:21:25,742 ‪重视家庭的人 就像我自己一样 434 00:21:25,826 --> 00:21:28,537 ‪如果你们不知道的话 ‪我们是这家唯一... 435 00:21:29,371 --> 00:21:30,664 ‪没孩子的夫妻 436 00:21:31,206 --> 00:21:33,166 ‪这就是我为什么迫不及待 ‪发表以下声明 437 00:21:34,751 --> 00:21:35,752 ‪抱歉 宝贝 438 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:38,672 ‪尼克和我要... 439 00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:41,633 ‪今晚大醉一场！ 440 00:21:41,717 --> 00:21:44,011 ‪明早睡过头！ 441 00:21:47,597 --> 00:21:49,850 ‪我说那句话时 你脸上的表情很搞笑 442 00:21:49,933 --> 00:21:52,102 ‪是 我有点担心 443 00:21:52,811 --> 00:21:54,938 ‪好了 说真的 我爱他们全家 444 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:57,274 ‪尼克 乔 凯文 你们都很棒 445 00:21:57,357 --> 00:21:58,692 ‪尼克改变了我的生活 446 00:21:58,775 --> 00:22:01,945 ‪我不想做别人的保姆 ‪我是说我不想嫁给别人 447 00:22:04,448 --> 00:22:05,657 ‪永远不 448 00:22:05,741 --> 00:22:09,661 ‪女士们先生们 ‪为朴雅卡乔普拉乔纳斯鼓掌！ 449 00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:11,288 ‪谢谢 450 00:22:15,625 --> 00:22:17,044 ‪天哪 451 00:22:17,127 --> 00:22:18,045 ‪你感觉如何？ 452 00:22:18,128 --> 00:22:19,588 ‪看看这对爱侣 453 00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:21,923 ‪你做到了 454 00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:28,221 ‪很多乔纳斯兄弟的趣事 ‪大多数人都不知道 455 00:22:28,305 --> 00:22:30,682 ‪比如 有一次 当他们还是... 456 00:22:31,850 --> 00:22:32,684 ‪等一下 457 00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:36,813 ‪我知道到处都会响起这种琴声 458 00:22:36,897 --> 00:22:39,816 ‪女士们先生们 约翰传奇来到了现场 459 00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:41,151 ‪好耶 460 00:22:43,445 --> 00:22:44,446 ‪你怎么样 哥们？ 461 00:22:47,783 --> 00:22:49,951 ‪你还好吗？你整晚一直坐在那儿？ 462 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:52,370 ‪你知道我的 ‪我喜欢好玩的派对 基南 463 00:22:52,454 --> 00:22:56,500 ‪无论何时城里有派对 ‪我就带着我的钢琴现身 464 00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:57,667 ‪没错 465 00:22:57,751 --> 00:23:00,962 ‪既然你在 那你介意 ‪为我们弹首歌吗？ 466 00:23:01,046 --> 00:23:02,214 ‪介意 你知道为什么吗？ 467 00:23:02,839 --> 00:23:05,926 ‪我为我最爱的乐队写了首小曲 468 00:23:06,009 --> 00:23:07,052 ‪好耶 469 00:23:07,135 --> 00:23:09,012 ‪乔纳斯兄弟 你们干吗不过来？ 470 00:23:09,096 --> 00:23:10,555 ‪-好！ ‪-下来 朋友们 471 00:23:12,516 --> 00:23:13,350 ‪给你们写的 472 00:23:13,850 --> 00:23:14,976 ‪专门献给你们 473 00:23:15,060 --> 00:23:16,269 ‪专门献给你们 474 00:23:16,353 --> 00:23:17,312 ‪享受吧 475 00:23:17,395 --> 00:23:18,271 ‪好好享受 476 00:23:26,279 --> 00:23:29,491 ‪工薪阶级的少年 ‪怀揣梦想长大 477 00:23:29,574 --> 00:23:33,870 ‪他们赚了很多钱 ‪使很多女孩尖叫 478 00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:37,749 ‪他们做的音乐 ‪席卷全球 479 00:23:37,833 --> 00:23:41,002 ‪无论去哪儿 ‪票都卖光 480 00:23:41,837 --> 00:23:42,712 ‪确实 481 00:23:42,796 --> 00:23:45,382 ‪我只想成为他们最爱的粉丝 482 00:23:45,924 --> 00:23:49,136 ‪我写了首歌来告诉他们 ‪他们是我最爱的乐队 483 00:23:49,761 --> 00:23:53,682 ‪我希望他们能听到 ‪但他们今天没到场 484 00:23:53,765 --> 00:23:59,354 ‪没有约翰 保罗 乔治和林戈 ‪只有乔和尼克 我想说... 485 00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:00,689 ‪基思？ 486 00:24:02,190 --> 00:24:05,569 ‪你们不是披头士 487 00:24:05,652 --> 00:24:10,115 ‪不是披头士 ‪尽管你们人很好 488 00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:15,036 ‪你们很帅 ‪也比汉森兄弟强 489 00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:17,664 ‪但你们永远成不了披头士 ‪你们尽力了 490 00:24:17,747 --> 00:24:20,876 ‪你们不是披头士 491 00:24:21,751 --> 00:24:25,130 ‪不是披头士 ‪我告诉你们为什么 492 00:24:26,548 --> 00:24:28,925 ‪你可以带他们回家见奶奶 493 00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:30,594 ‪但他们永远带不回格莱美 494 00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:32,804 ‪他们永远成不了披头士 495 00:24:32,888 --> 00:24:35,974 ‪这辈子都没戏 496 00:24:37,642 --> 00:24:41,313 ‪想象一下写不出《想象》 497 00:24:42,898 --> 00:24:45,734 ‪只会写《舔狗》 ‪我忘了其他 498 00:24:47,068 --> 00:24:50,488 ‪想象一下保罗麦卡特尼 ‪出演《勇敢者游戏》？ 499 00:24:50,572 --> 00:24:53,825 ‪不是《让它去》 ‪而是尼克的《嫉妒心》 500 00:24:54,576 --> 00:24:58,246 ‪林戈斯塔尔也不会是最弱一环 501 00:24:58,330 --> 00:25:01,333 ‪只有基思...还是科克？ 502 00:25:01,917 --> 00:25:03,084 ‪他叫什么？ 503 00:25:05,128 --> 00:25:07,797 ‪乔治哈里森每次听到 504 00:25:07,881 --> 00:25:10,759 ‪《海边蛋糕》 505 00:25:11,218 --> 00:25:14,471 ‪都会气得在坟墓中打滚 506 00:25:14,554 --> 00:25:17,891 ‪你们不是披头士 507 00:25:17,974 --> 00:25:22,604 ‪不是披头士 ‪尽管你们人很好 508 00:25:23,396 --> 00:25:26,816 ‪你们很帅 ‪也比汉森兄弟强 509 00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:29,778 ‪但你们永远成不了披头士 ‪你们尽力了 510 00:25:29,861 --> 00:25:32,864 ‪不是披头士 511 00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:37,160 ‪不是披头士 ‪我告诉你们为什么 512 00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:41,414 ‪你可以带他们回家见奶奶 ‪但他们永远带不回格莱美 513 00:25:41,498 --> 00:25:44,000 ‪他们永远成不了披头士 514 00:25:44,084 --> 00:25:46,628 ‪这辈子都没戏 515 00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:48,964 ‪大家跟我一起唱 516 00:25:49,506 --> 00:25:54,886 ‪哦 不 517 00:25:56,554 --> 00:25:58,890 ‪不要尼克和乔 518 00:26:00,058 --> 00:26:01,184 ‪还有基思？ 519 00:26:02,602 --> 00:26:07,399 ‪哦 不 520 00:26:07,482 --> 00:26:09,484 ‪不 521 00:26:10,986 --> 00:26:13,697 ‪不要乔纳斯兄弟 522 00:26:14,781 --> 00:26:15,865 ‪对我来说 523 00:26:17,784 --> 00:26:20,203 ‪你们不是披头士 524 00:26:22,038 --> 00:26:25,667 ‪不是披头士 ‪尽管你们人很好 525 00:26:26,251 --> 00:26:30,046 ‪你们很帅 ‪也比汉森兄弟强 526 00:26:30,547 --> 00:26:32,590 ‪-这点我认！ ‪-但你们永远成不了披头士 527 00:26:32,674 --> 00:26:33,508 ‪你们尽力了 528 00:26:33,591 --> 00:26:35,844 ‪不是披头士 529 00:26:37,053 --> 00:26:40,557 ‪不是披头士 ‪祝你们下次好运 530 00:26:42,225 --> 00:26:43,977 ‪但往好处看 531 00:26:44,060 --> 00:26:45,895 ‪你们都娶了漂亮妻子 532 00:26:45,979 --> 00:26:48,273 ‪她们没破坏你们的组合 533 00:26:49,983 --> 00:26:53,028 ‪而你们也都没死 534 00:26:56,740 --> 00:26:58,408 ‪约翰传奇 535 00:27:01,578 --> 00:27:02,871 ‪约翰传奇 536 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:04,539 ‪女士们先生们 537 00:27:08,835 --> 00:27:09,753 ‪谢谢 538 00:27:09,836 --> 00:27:10,837 ‪太棒了 539 00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:12,380 ‪-抱歉 ‪-太棒了 540 00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:13,506 ‪-太精彩了 ‪-谢谢 541 00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:14,966 ‪你唱得对 542 00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:16,301 ‪-你是对的 ‪-太棒了 543 00:27:16,384 --> 00:27:17,969 ‪-约翰传奇！ ‪-不是披头士 544 00:27:23,975 --> 00:27:28,855 ‪最近乔纳斯兄弟去了洛杉矶公羊队的 545 00:27:28,938 --> 00:27:30,815 ‪全新主场来判别 546 00:27:30,899 --> 00:27:34,319 ‪他们中谁在橄榄球上最不糟 547 00:27:34,402 --> 00:27:35,695 ‪咱们去看看情况如何 548 00:27:38,698 --> 00:27:39,783 ‪（洛杉矶公羊） 549 00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:43,078 ‪你能相信汤姆布雷迪 550 00:27:43,161 --> 00:27:44,412 ‪-要教咱们打橄榄球吗？ ‪-我懂 551 00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:45,372 ‪太疯狂了 552 00:27:45,455 --> 00:27:46,706 ‪汤姆布雷迪要教咱们 553 00:27:46,790 --> 00:27:48,917 ‪-打橄榄球 ‪-你们好吗 乔纳斯兄弟？ 554 00:27:49,876 --> 00:27:51,044 ‪你们准备好了吗？ 555 00:27:52,212 --> 00:27:53,296 ‪我是你们的教练 556 00:27:53,838 --> 00:27:55,090 ‪汤姆格雷迪 557 00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:57,675 ‪不 我们在等汤姆布雷迪 ‪不过谢谢你 558 00:27:57,759 --> 00:27:59,260 ‪他说你们在等汤姆... 559 00:27:59,344 --> 00:28:01,304 ‪天哪 为什么汤姆布雷迪要教你们？ 560 00:28:02,138 --> 00:28:03,223 ‪咱们开始训练吧 561 00:28:06,518 --> 00:28:07,394 ‪好了 先生们 562 00:28:07,477 --> 00:28:09,437 ‪今天我负责训练你们 563 00:28:09,521 --> 00:28:10,397 ‪橄榄球 564 00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:12,315 ‪训练结束后 我会放你们回去 565 00:28:12,399 --> 00:28:15,443 ‪但那之前 我要宣布 ‪你们中谁打得最差 566 00:28:16,236 --> 00:28:17,112 ‪高抬腿！ 567 00:28:17,195 --> 00:28:19,823 ‪高抬腿！收臀！ 568 00:28:19,906 --> 00:28:20,865 ‪收臀？ 569 00:28:20,949 --> 00:28:22,158 ‪做开合跳 开始吧 570 00:28:22,242 --> 00:28:24,411 ‪一、二、三、四 游泳摆臂 571 00:28:24,828 --> 00:28:26,579 ‪一个乔纳斯兄弟 572 00:28:26,663 --> 00:28:27,831 ‪两个乔纳斯兄弟 573 00:28:27,914 --> 00:28:29,332 ‪三个乔纳斯兄弟 574 00:28:29,416 --> 00:28:30,625 ‪我赢了！ 575 00:28:30,708 --> 00:28:32,127 ‪好了 咱们去吃点玉米片 576 00:28:32,627 --> 00:28:34,587 ‪假设现在是超级碗第四节最后一分钟 577 00:28:34,671 --> 00:28:36,005 ‪开球！ 578 00:28:39,175 --> 00:28:41,511 ‪我明白为什么人们 579 00:28:41,594 --> 00:28:43,555 ‪嫌乔纳斯兄弟太白了 580 00:28:43,638 --> 00:28:45,557 ‪你们乐队里需要黑人 581 00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:48,893 ‪尼克！认真比赛 582 00:28:48,977 --> 00:28:50,145 ‪开球！ 583 00:28:52,397 --> 00:28:55,108 ‪这才是我说的！ 584 00:28:57,652 --> 00:28:59,404 ‪-好！ ‪-好了 凯文 你没问题 585 00:28:59,487 --> 00:29:00,488 ‪开球！ 586 00:29:03,867 --> 00:29:05,034 ‪加油 凯文 587 00:29:05,952 --> 00:29:07,620 ‪天哪 拜托 588 00:29:11,916 --> 00:29:12,876 ‪我们今天就到此为止吧 589 00:29:12,959 --> 00:29:14,335 ‪-没事 凯文 ‪-咱们围过来 590 00:29:14,419 --> 00:29:16,504 ‪-咱们积极点围过来 ‪-你下次就行了 591 00:29:17,213 --> 00:29:18,465 ‪天哪 592 00:29:20,091 --> 00:29:22,469 ‪你们那天感觉如何？享受吗？ 593 00:29:22,552 --> 00:29:25,013 ‪凯文打橄榄球打得真烂 594 00:29:25,388 --> 00:29:28,433 ‪我感觉他们把我剪辑得很烂 595 00:29:28,933 --> 00:29:30,810 ‪我不知道那天有没有那么烂 596 00:29:30,894 --> 00:29:32,312 ‪-他不会打橄榄球 ‪-是 597 00:29:32,395 --> 00:29:33,605 ‪你的救赎来了 598 00:29:33,688 --> 00:29:38,026 ‪你还要接受一次挑战 ‪来看看你能否结束 599 00:29:38,109 --> 00:29:39,360 ‪橄榄球低能儿的状态 600 00:29:40,403 --> 00:29:42,113 ‪我们为何不看一看呢？ 601 00:29:42,197 --> 00:29:43,156 ‪这是你的时刻 602 00:29:43,239 --> 00:29:44,240 ‪请看 603 00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:47,619 ‪（SoFi体育场） 604 00:29:49,829 --> 00:29:51,289 ‪（SoFi体育场） 605 00:29:51,372 --> 00:29:52,916 ‪（家庭） 606 00:29:52,999 --> 00:29:54,709 ‪（横冲直撞） 607 00:29:58,630 --> 00:30:02,091 ‪凯文 该把你放到熔炉里试炼了 ‪看看能炼出什么 608 00:30:02,634 --> 00:30:07,764 ‪你要回到那个球场上 ‪但这次要球场里有七万名球迷 609 00:30:08,348 --> 00:30:09,224 ‪好 610 00:30:09,307 --> 00:30:11,851 ‪集中精神 努力踢进一个球 611 00:30:11,935 --> 00:30:13,394 ‪你能做到的 612 00:30:13,478 --> 00:30:19,192 ‪记住 擦亮眼 打开心 ‪我是你的脑残粉 613 00:30:20,026 --> 00:30:20,944 ‪好 614 00:30:21,027 --> 00:30:22,153 ‪咱们上场吧！ 615 00:30:23,905 --> 00:30:25,281 ‪天哪 会很糟的 616 00:30:25,365 --> 00:30:26,950 ‪就像送羊进屠宰场 617 00:30:27,492 --> 00:30:30,954 ‪请欢迎来自新泽西的跑卫 618 00:30:31,037 --> 00:30:34,457 ‪1号凯文乔纳斯！ 619 00:30:38,002 --> 00:30:39,087 ‪来了！ 620 00:30:44,092 --> 00:30:45,718 ‪好了 球迷们 621 00:30:52,642 --> 00:30:55,436 ‪好了 凯文 大家看看 ‪他能否把球踢过横杆 622 00:31:10,493 --> 00:31:15,164 ‪踢过去了 是个好球！ 623 00:31:22,380 --> 00:31:23,715 ‪你真棒！ 624 00:31:23,798 --> 00:31:25,550 ‪就该这么做！ 625 00:31:25,633 --> 00:31:26,885 ‪天哪 626 00:31:26,968 --> 00:31:28,303 ‪天哪！ 627 00:31:28,386 --> 00:31:30,346 ‪洛杉矶 为他欢呼！ 628 00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:36,436 ‪我做到了 教练 629 00:31:36,519 --> 00:31:38,897 ‪你做到了！你他妈做到了！ 630 00:31:38,980 --> 00:31:40,565 ‪当着所有这些人的面！ 631 00:31:41,232 --> 00:31:42,483 ‪太棒了 632 00:31:43,234 --> 00:31:45,028 ‪干得好 小凯 633 00:31:46,195 --> 00:31:47,363 ‪你做到了！ 634 00:31:47,447 --> 00:31:48,489 ‪第一次就成功了 635 00:31:48,573 --> 00:31:50,783 ‪当着七万人的面 了不起 636 00:31:50,867 --> 00:31:52,952 ‪没法证实那是第一次 637 00:31:53,036 --> 00:31:54,287 ‪我不确定 638 00:31:54,370 --> 00:31:56,831 ‪你踢那个球 ‪就像他们把你踢出乐队一样 639 00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:58,291 ‪不错 640 00:31:58,374 --> 00:31:59,751 ‪嘘！ 641 00:32:00,543 --> 00:32:02,420 ‪不过唯一的区别是我成功了 642 00:32:02,503 --> 00:32:03,630 ‪他们没有 所以没事 643 00:32:04,213 --> 00:32:05,673 ‪有来有往！ 644 00:32:06,633 --> 00:32:09,135 ‪我们拍了两部《勇敢者游戏》好吗？ ‪我认为我们成功了 645 00:32:11,220 --> 00:32:12,639 ‪确实 646 00:32:13,806 --> 00:32:14,974 ‪-两部 ‪-我喜欢你这样 647 00:32:15,058 --> 00:32:16,476 ‪你和巨石强森是朋友吗？ 648 00:32:16,559 --> 00:32:18,061 ‪不 他没回我电话 649 00:32:18,519 --> 00:32:19,854 ‪那个矮家伙呢？ 650 00:32:19,938 --> 00:32:20,980 ‪我跟他是朋友 651 00:32:21,064 --> 00:32:22,649 ‪黑人矮子总是最棒的 652 00:32:22,732 --> 00:32:23,608 ‪好了 653 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:28,821 ‪请欢迎最了解 654 00:32:28,905 --> 00:32:30,615 ‪乔纳斯兄弟的人 655 00:32:31,783 --> 00:32:33,284 ‪富兰克林乔纳斯 656 00:32:40,708 --> 00:32:42,126 ‪谢谢 657 00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,672 ‪-不 ‪-大家好！ 658 00:32:45,755 --> 00:32:46,965 ‪谢谢 659 00:32:47,048 --> 00:32:50,468 ‪是我 如假包换的富兰克林乔纳斯 660 00:32:51,636 --> 00:32:54,389 ‪他们叫我“‪额外‪的乔纳斯” 661 00:32:54,472 --> 00:32:57,308 ‪因为只有我拿不到薪水 662 00:32:58,559 --> 00:33:02,146 ‪我完全靠他们仨的 ‪圣诞礼物和生日礼物活着 663 00:33:02,772 --> 00:33:04,232 ‪#吃富人 664 00:33:05,441 --> 00:33:08,528 ‪说真的 作为你们的小弟弟 ‪我特别自豪 665 00:33:08,611 --> 00:33:11,906 ‪你们知道吗？你们很了不起 ‪能这么登顶 666 00:33:11,990 --> 00:33:13,533 ‪公告牌二百强专辑榜 667 00:33:13,616 --> 00:33:16,619 ‪但你们还需要我 ‪来摸到任何架子的顶层 668 00:33:18,454 --> 00:33:22,458 ‪我的生活很艰难 我告诉你们 669 00:33:23,501 --> 00:33:25,169 ‪真的艰难 670 00:33:26,462 --> 00:33:29,090 ‪有时我就觉得自己总是第四好的 671 00:33:29,674 --> 00:33:31,676 ‪哪怕我能找出新冠的治疗方法 672 00:33:31,759 --> 00:33:34,887 ‪你还是会觉得“不错 ‪但你没演过《摇滚夏令营》！” 673 00:33:36,764 --> 00:33:39,726 ‪但我还是爱你们 我只求你们 674 00:33:39,809 --> 00:33:41,769 ‪把余兴派对的地点发给我 675 00:33:41,853 --> 00:33:44,147 ‪我有了新手机 ‪所以你们得输到我的手机里 676 00:33:44,230 --> 00:33:46,190 ‪你知道吗？我们... 677 00:33:46,274 --> 00:33:49,736 ‪好了 皮特 感谢你的表演 ‪但你不能就这么走向乔纳斯... 678 00:33:49,819 --> 00:33:51,446 ‪谁是皮特？我是富兰克林 679 00:33:51,529 --> 00:33:52,739 ‪我是富兰克林乔纳斯 680 00:33:52,822 --> 00:33:54,240 ‪-明白 ‪-我只是要跟兄弟们在一起 681 00:33:54,323 --> 00:33:56,284 ‪我理解 但他们 ‪会在节目后见你 富兰克林 682 00:33:56,367 --> 00:33:57,535 ‪去你的 基南 683 00:33:57,618 --> 00:33:58,619 ‪-别这样 ‪-去你的 684 00:33:59,412 --> 00:34:02,957 ‪富兰克林乔纳斯 即皮特戴维森 685 00:34:03,541 --> 00:34:04,792 ‪再为他鼓掌 686 00:34:08,171 --> 00:34:12,633 ‪好了 咱们看一下 ‪乔纳斯兄弟吐槽大会 687 00:34:12,717 --> 00:34:14,010 ‪观察席 688 00:34:14,427 --> 00:34:18,097 ‪专属乔纳斯兄弟美好伴侣的 689 00:34:18,181 --> 00:34:19,599 ‪安逸贵宾区 690 00:34:20,183 --> 00:34:21,059 ‪等等 691 00:34:22,477 --> 00:34:24,479 ‪好吧 692 00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:26,814 ‪嗨 基汤 693 00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:30,276 ‪菲尔医生？ 694 00:34:35,948 --> 00:34:40,912 ‪你坐在乔纳斯兄弟妻子的 ‪专属高级沙发上干吗？ 695 00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:42,747 ‪我是医生 696 00:34:43,372 --> 00:34:44,916 ‪作为医生 697 00:34:44,999 --> 00:34:48,044 ‪我绝对有义务掺和 698 00:34:48,127 --> 00:34:49,837 ‪任何家庭闹剧 699 00:34:50,755 --> 00:34:54,050 ‪好吧 我想你应该发过医生誓言 700 00:34:54,133 --> 00:34:57,553 ‪我每天都在践行着那个誓言 基南 701 00:34:57,637 --> 00:35:01,641 ‪我用我训练有素的眼睛 ‪一直观察着吐槽大会 702 00:35:02,809 --> 00:35:04,894 ‪我觉得我能看出问题在哪儿 703 00:35:05,436 --> 00:35:09,899 ‪吐槽大会太刻薄了！ ‪我们教人们如何对待我们 704 00:35:09,982 --> 00:35:13,152 ‪如果你觉得别人该对你挑三拣四 705 00:35:13,236 --> 00:35:14,862 ‪别人就会对你挑三拣四！ 706 00:35:16,322 --> 00:35:19,992 ‪是 不过菲尔医生 ‪吐槽大会只是为了好玩 707 00:35:20,076 --> 00:35:22,161 ‪我受够了 基南汤普森 708 00:35:22,245 --> 00:35:23,579 ‪-冷静 ‪-好吧 709 00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:26,707 ‪关于乔纳斯兄弟 我要告诉你们 710 00:35:27,375 --> 00:35:30,878 ‪跟别人讲甜言蜜语总是比 711 00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:32,964 ‪让他们面对真相容易 712 00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:35,424 ‪我告诉你他们要面对的真相是 713 00:35:35,508 --> 00:35:39,137 ‪他们任何一个都配不上自己的妻子 714 00:35:40,429 --> 00:35:43,683 ‪那些男孩真是攀了高枝 715 00:35:44,892 --> 00:35:46,769 ‪难以置信 716 00:35:46,853 --> 00:35:49,814 ‪我不觉得你适合建议别人 ‪如何处理家庭关系 717 00:35:49,897 --> 00:35:51,774 ‪我是说你的儿子也在场 ‪你好吗 乔丹？ 718 00:35:52,900 --> 00:35:54,068 ‪闭嘴啊 爸！ 719 00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:56,487 ‪我告诉过你了 要叫菲尔医生 720 00:35:57,530 --> 00:36:01,701 ‪知道吗？你们这些男孩都无可救药了 721 00:36:02,118 --> 00:36:05,079 ‪你们彻底完蛋了 我走了 722 00:36:06,914 --> 00:36:08,499 ‪-大家 这是菲尔医生 ‪-抱歉 女士们 723 00:36:09,333 --> 00:36:10,209 ‪抱歉 724 00:36:11,294 --> 00:36:12,128 ‪该死 725 00:36:14,463 --> 00:36:15,590 ‪表现不错 菲尔 726 00:36:17,508 --> 00:36:19,051 ‪狒吠医生 727 00:36:19,844 --> 00:36:24,098 ‪女士们先生们 请欢迎丹妮尔乔纳斯 728 00:36:24,182 --> 00:36:25,600 ‪好耶 729 00:36:32,899 --> 00:36:36,861 ‪这边有点情况 我们快速解释一下 730 00:36:36,944 --> 00:36:38,112 ‪来吧 丹妮尔 731 00:36:39,197 --> 00:36:40,781 ‪她写道：“我失声了” 732 00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:41,699 ‪倒霉 733 00:36:41,782 --> 00:36:43,367 ‪-不 ‪-可怜的姑娘 734 00:36:43,451 --> 00:36:49,916 ‪“没事 至少我还有声音 ‪可以失去 不像凯文 735 00:36:51,792 --> 00:36:53,377 ‪他只唱和声” 736 00:36:53,461 --> 00:36:54,629 ‪没错 737 00:36:56,380 --> 00:36:59,842 ‪“失声了 我就不能吐槽凯文” 738 00:37:00,593 --> 00:37:01,636 ‪好 739 00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:03,179 ‪“也许你能代我吐槽？” 740 00:37:03,262 --> 00:37:05,056 ‪我？当然好 741 00:37:05,139 --> 00:37:06,432 ‪-我很乐意 ‪-好啊 742 00:37:07,475 --> 00:37:11,145 ‪好吧 我就替丹妮尔吐槽凯文 743 00:37:11,229 --> 00:37:12,146 ‪阿门 744 00:37:14,273 --> 00:37:15,650 ‪这些是她写的 745 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:18,277 ‪“我在度假时遇到了凯文 746 00:37:18,861 --> 00:37:22,615 ‪在那之前 我在假期中唯一做过的 747 00:37:22,698 --> 00:37:24,200 ‪自毁行为是编辫子 748 00:37:27,703 --> 00:37:30,414 ‪我基本上全程无视了他 749 00:37:30,915 --> 00:37:34,961 ‪他喜欢这点 ‪因为这让他想起了自己的妈妈” 750 00:37:35,044 --> 00:37:35,878 ‪天哪！ 751 00:37:37,755 --> 00:37:38,756 ‪重锤！ 752 00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:41,425 ‪“不过... 753 00:37:42,385 --> 00:37:45,513 ‪我喜欢我们过去12年的关系” 754 00:37:45,596 --> 00:37:46,764 ‪-耶 ‪-谢谢 755 00:37:46,847 --> 00:37:48,933 ‪“我们有两个可爱的女儿” 756 00:37:49,016 --> 00:37:50,184 ‪是的 757 00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:51,185 ‪是的 758 00:37:53,020 --> 00:37:56,941 ‪“我怀上孩子的方式很老套 ‪他出去巡演 759 00:37:57,024 --> 00:37:58,567 ‪我跟送奶工睡了” 760 00:37:58,651 --> 00:37:59,735 ‪丹妮尔！ 761 00:38:00,695 --> 00:38:01,779 ‪我不信 762 00:38:02,613 --> 00:38:03,614 ‪我不信 763 00:38:04,448 --> 00:38:05,658 ‪我不信 764 00:38:06,659 --> 00:38:10,079 ‪“但凯文真的是最好的父亲 ‪就像大多数家庭...” 765 00:38:10,913 --> 00:38:11,998 ‪没错 766 00:38:13,499 --> 00:38:14,750 ‪“就像大多数家庭 767 00:38:15,209 --> 00:38:17,920 ‪我们的女儿不知道她们的父亲有名” 768 00:38:20,673 --> 00:38:23,801 ‪“当然我觉得凯文是 ‪乔纳斯兄弟中最可爱的 769 00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:26,721 ‪-他有很美的眼睛” ‪-谢谢 宝贝 770 00:38:27,138 --> 00:38:28,848 ‪“最亲切的笑容 771 00:38:28,931 --> 00:38:31,684 ‪和巨大的...” 哇 772 00:38:31,767 --> 00:38:32,601 ‪好吧 773 00:38:35,146 --> 00:38:37,398 ‪胸怀 是胸怀 774 00:38:39,859 --> 00:38:40,735 ‪好 775 00:38:41,819 --> 00:38:42,903 ‪抱歉 776 00:38:44,655 --> 00:38:46,532 ‪丹妮尔 我不会念这句 777 00:38:47,742 --> 00:38:49,452 ‪但你不错哟 凯文 778 00:38:50,619 --> 00:38:51,912 ‪你明白我在说什么吗？ 779 00:38:53,122 --> 00:38:54,332 ‪你应该非常自豪 780 00:38:54,415 --> 00:38:55,624 ‪谢谢 781 00:38:55,708 --> 00:38:56,876 ‪老凯文 782 00:38:56,959 --> 00:38:58,878 ‪你也应该非常自豪 ‪我看见你那儿也很鼓 783 00:38:58,961 --> 00:39:00,588 ‪所以我知道他从哪儿获得的遗传 784 00:39:01,380 --> 00:39:02,298 ‪就是这么回事 785 00:39:02,381 --> 00:39:05,134 ‪“总之 我爱你 凯文” 786 00:39:05,718 --> 00:39:06,552 ‪我爱你 宝贝 787 00:39:06,635 --> 00:39:08,846 ‪掌声鼓励丹妮尔乔纳斯 ‪女士们先生们 788 00:39:11,891 --> 00:39:13,976 ‪爱在哪里？ 789 00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:16,228 ‪甜蜜啊 790 00:39:16,312 --> 00:39:18,105 ‪送她回座 791 00:39:22,943 --> 00:39:23,819 ‪干得好 792 00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:25,613 ‪下面... 793 00:39:26,447 --> 00:39:29,033 ‪一位非常了解尼克的人 794 00:39:29,116 --> 00:39:31,410 ‪心中有话 不吐不快 795 00:39:31,494 --> 00:39:32,411 ‪咱们看一下 796 00:39:33,704 --> 00:39:34,705 {\an8}‪听着 797 00:39:34,789 --> 00:39:36,165 {\an8}‪我是尼克电视上的亲密朋友 798 00:39:36,248 --> 00:39:37,208 {\an8}‪（布雷克谢尔顿） 799 00:39:37,291 --> 00:39:39,001 {\an8}‪我认识他很久了 大概... 800 00:39:39,502 --> 00:39:40,961 ‪两季的《美国之声》 801 00:39:41,504 --> 00:39:43,714 ‪他是我个人的亲密同事 802 00:39:44,256 --> 00:39:46,634 ‪我想告诉你们 ‪我爱尼克乔纳斯的几个原因 803 00:39:47,593 --> 00:39:48,469 ‪一 804 00:39:48,969 --> 00:39:50,096 ‪他没威胁 805 00:39:50,596 --> 00:39:52,765 ‪音乐公司不会告诉自己的艺人 806 00:39:52,848 --> 00:39:56,102 ‪“这周别发歌 ‪因为尼克乔纳斯要发专辑” 807 00:39:56,185 --> 00:39:58,145 ‪一般公司说的话正好相反 808 00:39:58,229 --> 00:40:02,024 ‪“这周赶紧发歌 没人竞争” 809 00:40:02,108 --> 00:40:02,942 ‪你真棒 810 00:40:03,734 --> 00:40:04,568 ‪二 811 00:40:04,652 --> 00:40:07,530 ‪总能很容易找到他 ‪因为他每次离开家 812 00:40:07,613 --> 00:40:10,741 ‪就自拍 然后 ‪发到Instagram上 813 00:40:11,617 --> 00:40:12,451 ‪三 814 00:40:12,535 --> 00:40:13,702 ‪他是个好演员 815 00:40:13,786 --> 00:40:17,665 ‪他在《美国之声》上 ‪连演了两季专业声乐教练 816 00:40:17,748 --> 00:40:18,707 ‪（四 817 00:40:18,791 --> 00:40:21,043 ‪我爱尼克乔纳斯的最后一个原因是 818 00:40:21,127 --> 00:40:24,463 ‪他周围聚集着远比他酷的人 819 00:40:24,964 --> 00:40:27,842 ‪尼克和其他的乔纳斯兄弟 我爱你们 820 00:40:27,925 --> 00:40:30,511 ‪谢谢你们让我在另一个录影棚 ‪参与这个节目 821 00:40:31,095 --> 00:40:33,597 ‪你们付的钱不够让我到场 822 00:40:33,681 --> 00:40:34,682 ‪再次感谢 823 00:40:37,226 --> 00:40:38,227 ‪好 824 00:40:39,353 --> 00:40:40,729 ‪布雷克谢尔顿 825 00:40:42,231 --> 00:40:44,358 ‪-哇 ‪-天哪 826 00:40:44,442 --> 00:40:48,988 ‪许多人不知道 但乔纳斯兄弟的粉丝 827 00:40:49,071 --> 00:40:49,989 ‪遍布世界各地 828 00:40:50,948 --> 00:40:51,907 ‪请... 829 00:40:53,617 --> 00:40:56,537 ‪掌声欢迎大洋对岸的 830 00:40:56,620 --> 00:40:58,122 ‪特别吐槽者 831 00:40:58,205 --> 00:41:02,877 ‪他是英国最有名的喜剧明星之一 ‪杰克怀特霍尔 832 00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:03,919 ‪掌声欢迎！ 833 00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,715 ‪杰克 834 00:41:07,798 --> 00:41:09,383 ‪杰克 835 00:41:09,467 --> 00:41:10,676 ‪杰克 836 00:41:10,759 --> 00:41:12,261 ‪-杰克！ ‪-耶！ 837 00:41:16,015 --> 00:41:16,932 ‪太好了！ 838 00:41:17,516 --> 00:41:18,851 ‪十分荣幸来到这里 839 00:41:18,934 --> 00:41:22,354 ‪我一定要提醒你们 ‪我的国家里有很多吐司 840 00:41:22,438 --> 00:41:23,522 ‪而不是吐槽者 841 00:41:23,606 --> 00:41:24,982 ‪我今晚不会 842 00:41:25,065 --> 00:41:27,776 ‪有片刻当着你们的面 843 00:41:27,860 --> 00:41:32,072 ‪玷污这些年轻绅士的品格 844 00:41:33,240 --> 00:41:34,575 ‪-看看他们 ‪-我怀疑 845 00:41:36,118 --> 00:41:39,288 ‪你们这些漂亮的混蛋 846 00:41:40,372 --> 00:41:41,832 ‪你们的父亲呢？他在哪儿？ 847 00:41:41,916 --> 00:41:43,334 ‪那边坐了一个骄傲的男人 848 00:41:44,335 --> 00:41:45,669 ‪老凯文 849 00:41:46,295 --> 00:41:47,505 ‪没错 850 00:41:47,588 --> 00:41:51,091 ‪给那人的睾丸一座格莱美 851 00:41:51,175 --> 00:41:53,928 ‪以表彰它们在音乐上的贡献 852 00:41:55,554 --> 00:41:57,389 ‪-耶！ ‪-给老凯文的蛋蛋 853 00:41:57,473 --> 00:41:58,807 ‪热烈鼓掌！ 854 00:41:58,891 --> 00:41:59,892 ‪为什么不呢？ 855 00:42:02,811 --> 00:42:06,106 ‪那些器官应该挂在摇滚名人堂中 856 00:42:07,608 --> 00:42:09,985 ‪今晚我觉得我终于 857 00:42:10,069 --> 00:42:12,696 ‪我该向世界承认 858 00:42:12,780 --> 00:42:15,908 ‪我不是戒毒前的约翰木兰尼 859 00:42:17,576 --> 00:42:21,956 ‪我是杰克怀特霍尔 ‪我是乔纳斯兄弟的狂热粉 860 00:42:22,456 --> 00:42:24,375 ‪感觉真好 861 00:42:25,751 --> 00:42:26,752 ‪坦白的感觉真好 对吧？ 862 00:42:26,835 --> 00:42:28,546 ‪我被乔纳斯果汁迷醉了 863 00:42:29,338 --> 00:42:31,298 ‪我是乔纳斯成人脑残粉 864 00:42:32,424 --> 00:42:34,802 ‪你们是我罪恶的快乐 865 00:42:34,885 --> 00:42:38,722 ‪就跟在洗澡时撒尿 ‪或在优步中手淫一样 866 00:42:40,057 --> 00:42:43,727 ‪这些爱好中 最让我难过的是 867 00:42:43,811 --> 00:42:45,354 ‪喜欢你们的音乐 868 00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:48,274 ‪不过老实说 优步那个也有点 869 00:42:48,691 --> 00:42:52,486 ‪但为什么呢？为什么一个男人 ‪就不能爱乔纳斯兄弟呢？ 870 00:42:53,112 --> 00:42:54,405 ‪对 为什么呢？ 871 00:42:54,905 --> 00:42:57,992 ‪我的牌落在劳凯利手里 ‪都不会受到这么多审视 872 00:43:00,286 --> 00:43:02,955 ‪为什么摇滚非得硬派呢？ 873 00:43:03,038 --> 00:43:05,040 ‪我就喜欢软蛋摇滚 874 00:43:05,874 --> 00:43:07,459 ‪蛋软了 才可以用手指 875 00:43:08,502 --> 00:43:11,463 ‪三个看起来应该给A&F看门的男人 876 00:43:11,547 --> 00:43:12,923 ‪做出了这种音乐 877 00:43:14,842 --> 00:43:16,802 ‪也许两个看门 一个在库房干 878 00:43:18,178 --> 00:43:19,471 ‪抱歉 尼克 879 00:43:19,555 --> 00:43:21,432 ‪哦 谢谢 880 00:43:21,515 --> 00:43:24,310 ‪你知道作为在英国长大的小男孩 881 00:43:24,393 --> 00:43:26,145 ‪喜欢乔纳斯兄弟有多难吗？ 882 00:43:26,604 --> 00:43:29,064 ‪老被欺负 先生 每天都被欺负！ 883 00:43:29,148 --> 00:43:31,400 ‪在学校被霍格沃茨的男孩欺负 884 00:43:32,901 --> 00:43:36,697 ‪人们总给我压力 ‪要我听酷的前卫的音乐 885 00:43:36,780 --> 00:43:41,035 ‪不能听麻木心灵的乏味小调 886 00:43:41,118 --> 00:43:41,994 ‪（杰克怀特豪尔） 887 00:43:42,077 --> 00:43:45,414 ‪他们还说“如果你听乔纳斯兄弟 ‪你就泡不到任何姑娘 杰克” 888 00:43:45,497 --> 00:43:47,333 ‪也许我就不想要姑娘呢 889 00:43:48,334 --> 00:43:51,420 ‪也许我心里乔纳斯兄弟比婊子重要呢 890 00:43:53,547 --> 00:43:54,423 ‪好耶 891 00:43:54,506 --> 00:43:57,009 ‪知道吗？既然在这里的都是朋友 892 00:43:57,092 --> 00:43:59,303 ‪这是个安全空间 ‪我就分享几句心里话 893 00:43:59,386 --> 00:44:03,432 ‪朋友们 我可是发誓守贞了 894 00:44:04,224 --> 00:44:05,267 ‪没错！ 895 00:44:05,351 --> 00:44:08,020 ‪把我这个甜心锁起来 再扔掉钥匙！ 896 00:44:09,104 --> 00:44:10,898 ‪谁准备好撬开罐子尝蜜糖 897 00:44:10,981 --> 00:44:12,316 ‪就喊一嗓子！ 898 00:44:14,026 --> 00:44:15,819 ‪看来今晚有很多处女到场！ 899 00:44:15,903 --> 00:44:16,904 ‪很好！ 900 00:44:17,863 --> 00:44:20,324 ‪跟你们一样 我少年时代大部分时光 901 00:44:20,407 --> 00:44:22,743 ‪都发誓守贞 902 00:44:22,826 --> 00:44:28,248 ‪我发誓不碰学校里的任何女生 903 00:44:30,250 --> 00:44:34,546 ‪你们知道我的男性处女膜怎么能 ‪这么久还不破吗？ 904 00:44:35,964 --> 00:44:38,467 ‪就因为你们 说真的 905 00:44:38,550 --> 00:44:41,053 ‪我越跟姑娘们说我听你们的音乐 906 00:44:41,136 --> 00:44:43,263 ‪她们就越不愿意跟我上床 907 00:44:44,390 --> 00:44:48,352 ‪我可能像个麻风病人脖子上 ‪挂警铃那样挂着你们的专辑 908 00:44:49,645 --> 00:44:50,896 ‪我不行了 909 00:44:50,979 --> 00:44:55,442 ‪不过听着 说真的 ‪我们还得谈谈艰难时期 910 00:44:56,235 --> 00:44:58,695 ‪2013年10月30日 911 00:44:59,405 --> 00:45:01,323 ‪拜托别笑 话题很严肃 912 00:45:01,824 --> 00:45:03,617 ‪简直是音乐行业的911 913 00:45:04,410 --> 00:45:09,581 ‪那天我的心被撕碎成一千片 914 00:45:10,541 --> 00:45:13,419 ‪听着 我不会站在这儿指责谁 915 00:45:13,502 --> 00:45:16,171 ‪不然我们可以说一整晚 ‪“尼克说了这个” 916 00:45:16,255 --> 00:45:17,256 ‪“尼克做了那个” 917 00:45:17,339 --> 00:45:20,884 ‪不 解散是共同决定 918 00:45:20,968 --> 00:45:23,095 ‪这样尼克才可以专心发展个人事业 919 00:45:23,720 --> 00:45:26,723 ‪任何人都不怪 除了尼克 ‪绝对是他的错 920 00:45:27,808 --> 00:45:29,476 ‪看看他 921 00:45:30,853 --> 00:45:32,813 ‪抱歉 我还难受呢 922 00:45:34,565 --> 00:45:35,774 ‪破坏兄弟关系的人 923 00:45:36,525 --> 00:45:38,235 ‪流行音乐届的梅根王妃 924 00:45:41,321 --> 00:45:43,574 ‪现在乐队重组了！ 925 00:45:43,657 --> 00:45:44,700 ‪没错 926 00:45:46,660 --> 00:45:47,494 ‪太好了！ 927 00:45:48,912 --> 00:45:49,872 ‪不客气 928 00:45:51,039 --> 00:45:51,957 ‪谢谢 929 00:45:52,040 --> 00:45:56,003 ‪你抑制不住这些人 ‪他们就像新冠病毒 930 00:45:56,545 --> 00:45:59,423 ‪如果第二波疫情教给我们任何事的话 931 00:45:59,506 --> 00:46:03,177 ‪那就是这个社会消灭不了乔纳斯兄弟 932 00:46:03,260 --> 00:46:05,095 ‪我们必须学会跟他们共存 933 00:46:06,346 --> 00:46:08,223 ‪并祈祷他们不会变异 934 00:46:10,058 --> 00:46:13,228 ‪我的重点是 不开玩笑 935 00:46:13,312 --> 00:46:16,523 ‪你们给太多人留下了不可磨灭的痕迹 936 00:46:16,607 --> 00:46:18,275 ‪尤其是我 937 00:46:18,358 --> 00:46:20,527 ‪说真的 我这话可是有隐含意的 938 00:46:20,611 --> 00:46:24,740 ‪多年前 我走进纹身店时 ‪他们对我说 939 00:46:24,823 --> 00:46:27,910 ‪我在犯一个很严重的错误 940 00:46:27,993 --> 00:46:30,204 ‪但你们知道我对他们说什么吗？ 941 00:46:30,287 --> 00:46:31,622 ‪无悔 942 00:46:32,372 --> 00:46:34,291 ‪“乔纳斯兄弟比‪婊子‪重要” 943 00:46:40,088 --> 00:46:41,215 ‪傑克 944 00:46:43,759 --> 00:46:44,718 ‪好耶 945 00:46:44,801 --> 00:46:46,136 ‪杰克怀特霍尔 女士们先生们 946 00:46:46,220 --> 00:46:47,095 ‪哇 947 00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:50,933 ‪是那纹身 948 00:46:51,558 --> 00:46:54,228 ‪任何在抖音上关注乔乔纳斯的人 949 00:46:54,311 --> 00:46:57,356 ‪我猜其中大多数人是真人 950 00:46:57,439 --> 00:46:59,233 ‪都知道他最近突然造访 951 00:46:59,316 --> 00:47:03,320 ‪单向组合对乔纳斯兄弟主题 ‪动感单车健身课堂 952 00:47:03,403 --> 00:47:05,447 ‪-没错！ ‪-所以这次 953 00:47:05,531 --> 00:47:08,867 ‪他决定再来一回 并带上奈尔霍兰 954 00:47:10,202 --> 00:47:12,496 ‪只不过这次他们变装登场 955 00:47:12,579 --> 00:47:14,081 ‪请热烈鼓掌欢迎 956 00:47:14,873 --> 00:47:18,710 ‪我今天要面试的新教练 957 00:47:18,794 --> 00:47:21,088 ‪史蒂夫！ 958 00:47:21,171 --> 00:47:22,589 ‪大家动起来！ 959 00:47:22,673 --> 00:47:24,049 ‪女士们先生们 感觉如何？ 960 00:47:24,132 --> 00:47:24,967 ‪（乔乔纳斯） 961 00:47:25,050 --> 00:47:25,884 ‪咱们开始吧 962 00:47:25,968 --> 00:47:29,680 ‪我叫史蒂夫 很激动今天来到这里 963 00:47:29,763 --> 00:47:31,223 ‪你们好吗？ 964 00:47:31,306 --> 00:47:34,560 ‪我叫托比 来自澳大利亚悉尼 965 00:47:34,643 --> 00:47:35,477 ‪（奈尔霍兰） 966 00:47:35,561 --> 00:47:36,937 ‪你们好吗？ 967 00:47:37,521 --> 00:47:39,356 ‪是吗？很好 968 00:47:39,439 --> 00:47:40,816 ‪（第一轮） 969 00:47:42,568 --> 00:47:45,404 ‪我听说乔纳斯兄弟甚至都不是亲兄弟 970 00:47:45,487 --> 00:47:47,614 ‪我读到过乔纳斯兄弟 ‪甚至都不是亲兄弟 971 00:47:48,657 --> 00:47:49,866 ‪迪士尼弄虚作假 972 00:47:49,950 --> 00:47:50,993 ‪迪士尼弄虚作假 973 00:47:51,827 --> 00:47:53,954 ‪我的朋友约会过其中那个浓眉的 974 00:47:54,037 --> 00:47:55,414 ‪超级差劲的男友 975 00:47:55,497 --> 00:47:57,416 ‪我的朋友约会过其中那个浓眉的 976 00:47:59,167 --> 00:48:02,337 ‪她说他很差劲 好了 977 00:48:04,089 --> 00:48:05,924 ‪单向组合是有史以来最帅的男孩组合 978 00:48:06,008 --> 00:48:06,842 ‪我说得对吗？ 979 00:48:07,593 --> 00:48:09,803 ‪说他们有名多了 一直如此 980 00:48:09,886 --> 00:48:12,848 ‪他们有名多了 成功多了 981 00:48:15,142 --> 00:48:17,185 ‪你们听说过奈尔霍兰吗？ 982 00:48:17,269 --> 00:48:18,645 ‪还不如叫他“奈尔无聊” 983 00:48:18,729 --> 00:48:19,688 ‪对 984 00:48:19,771 --> 00:48:21,732 ‪他无聊透顶 985 00:48:21,815 --> 00:48:22,691 ‪你们知道他吗？ 986 00:48:23,650 --> 00:48:24,610 ‪老让人失望 987 00:48:25,611 --> 00:48:28,447 ‪不过他已经是他们组合里最帅的了 988 00:48:28,530 --> 00:48:32,117 ‪不过他已经是...人们总在谈哈里 989 00:48:32,743 --> 00:48:36,204 ‪可他才是组合里最帅的人 ‪远胜于其他人 990 00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:39,166 ‪你们同意吗？ 991 00:48:40,626 --> 00:48:41,710 ‪撒谎 992 00:48:43,003 --> 00:48:44,212 ‪（第二轮） 993 00:48:44,296 --> 00:48:45,714 ‪你们谁想有这样的肌肉？ 994 00:48:46,340 --> 00:48:49,926 ‪你们谁想有这样强悍的肌肉？ 995 00:48:50,385 --> 00:48:52,804 ‪动起来！ 996 00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:55,974 ‪说：“谁想骑车锻练出 ‪我这样的臀部？” 997 00:48:56,058 --> 00:49:00,896 ‪别害羞 让我听见你们喊 ‪“我们想骑车锻练出大翘臀” 998 00:49:00,979 --> 00:49:03,273 ‪好了 谁想要我这样的大翘臀？ 999 00:49:04,066 --> 00:49:05,067 ‪喊出来 1000 00:49:06,318 --> 00:49:09,404 ‪翘臀！ 1001 00:49:10,197 --> 00:49:11,740 ‪好在我们在车库 1002 00:49:11,823 --> 00:49:13,617 ‪我自己这辆车的大翘臀可不小 1003 00:49:13,700 --> 00:49:15,911 ‪好在我们在车库 ‪我自己这辆车的大翘臀可不小 1004 00:49:18,789 --> 00:49:19,873 ‪（第三轮） 1005 00:49:19,956 --> 00:49:22,417 ‪告诉他们你昨晚刚跟女友分手 1006 00:49:22,501 --> 00:49:25,921 ‪我昨晚刚跟女友分手 1007 00:49:27,047 --> 00:49:28,256 ‪感觉有点难过 1008 00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:31,677 ‪如果你是摩羯座 你就歇一会儿 1009 00:49:32,219 --> 00:49:33,845 ‪如果你是摩羯座 你就歇一会儿 1010 00:49:35,055 --> 00:49:35,931 ‪别走 1011 00:49:36,014 --> 00:49:39,309 ‪如果你是天蝎座 ‪你就以现在的两倍速骑车 1012 00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:42,104 ‪对 如果你是天蝎座 骑快点 1013 00:49:42,187 --> 00:49:44,356 ‪你说“我的前女友是天蝎座” ‪然后开始哭 1014 00:49:44,773 --> 00:49:46,316 ‪我的前女友是天蝎座 1015 00:49:56,410 --> 00:49:57,536 ‪你们喜欢托比吗？ 1016 00:49:57,619 --> 00:49:58,787 ‪你们喜欢托比吗？ 1017 00:49:59,955 --> 00:50:01,832 ‪我们昨晚出去晚了 1018 00:50:01,915 --> 00:50:03,333 ‪你说“他真是个垃圾” 1019 00:50:03,417 --> 00:50:05,293 ‪他真是个垃圾 不是吗？ 1020 00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:08,463 ‪你说“他不知道 1021 00:50:08,547 --> 00:50:10,549 ‪我开始跟他女友布鲁克约会了” 1022 00:50:10,632 --> 00:50:11,508 ‪他其实不知道 1023 00:50:11,591 --> 00:50:13,051 ‪但我开始跟他女友布鲁克约会了 1024 00:50:16,513 --> 00:50:17,472 ‪好了 祝你们好运！ 1025 00:50:18,557 --> 00:50:19,641 ‪太好了 1026 00:50:20,267 --> 00:50:21,268 ‪干得好 1027 00:50:21,351 --> 00:50:22,519 ‪-天哪 ‪-干得漂亮 1028 00:50:22,602 --> 00:50:23,687 ‪太有意思了 1029 00:50:23,770 --> 00:50:27,983 ‪谢谢大家参与了这么棒的一节课 1030 00:50:28,066 --> 00:50:33,155 ‪现在希望大家能掌声鼓励 ‪我们今天的特别教练 1031 00:50:34,364 --> 00:50:36,783 ‪好耶 1032 00:50:41,788 --> 00:50:44,583 ‪耶 嘿 1033 00:50:46,209 --> 00:50:48,420 ‪非常感谢大家！你们太棒了 1034 00:50:48,503 --> 00:50:50,338 ‪咱们狂欢吧！ 1035 00:50:51,965 --> 00:50:53,341 ‪欢呼吧！ 1036 00:50:54,217 --> 00:50:55,761 ‪我们还有两位特别来宾 1037 00:50:59,639 --> 00:51:01,099 ‪干得好 1038 00:51:01,183 --> 00:51:02,350 ‪-谢谢 ‪-演得不错 1039 00:51:03,143 --> 00:51:04,019 ‪干得好！ 1040 00:51:04,102 --> 00:51:05,771 ‪你们表现很好！谢谢！ 1041 00:51:05,854 --> 00:51:07,564 ‪谢谢大家 你们很棒 1042 00:51:07,647 --> 00:51:09,733 ‪这两个教练中 你们觉得谁更好？ 1043 00:51:09,816 --> 00:51:11,151 ‪奈尔！ 1044 00:51:14,362 --> 00:51:16,406 ‪我觉得很明显 奈尔 你赢了 1045 00:51:22,662 --> 00:51:23,705 ‪-演得好 ‪-当然 1046 00:51:26,833 --> 00:51:28,585 ‪非常感谢奈尔霍兰 1047 00:51:28,668 --> 00:51:30,253 ‪-请为奈尔霍兰鼓掌 ‪-奈尔 1048 00:51:33,173 --> 00:51:37,594 ‪下面请欢迎等这个机会 ‪已经等了五年的人 1049 00:51:38,220 --> 00:51:39,596 ‪索菲特纳 1050 00:51:43,266 --> 00:51:44,768 ‪-来吧！ ‪-鼓掌欢迎！ 1051 00:51:49,397 --> 00:51:50,649 ‪你们好 1052 00:51:51,525 --> 00:51:52,359 ‪大家好 1053 00:51:53,860 --> 00:51:56,488 ‪说真的 我过来只是因为 ‪人们告诉我 1054 00:51:56,571 --> 00:52:00,158 ‪美国的大家庭聚会 ‪就是你最狠吐槽家人的场合 1055 00:52:00,242 --> 00:52:01,368 ‪所以... 1056 00:52:01,827 --> 00:52:05,080 ‪当乔请我参与这个活动时 ‪我就说：“当然了 蠢货” 1057 00:52:07,707 --> 00:52:09,876 ‪咱们谈谈守贞戒指吧 1058 00:52:12,170 --> 00:52:14,464 ‪如果你们还不知道 1059 00:52:14,548 --> 00:52:18,301 ‪戴守贞戒指就表明你在婚前 1060 00:52:18,385 --> 00:52:19,511 ‪要戒绝性行为 1061 00:52:19,594 --> 00:52:21,721 ‪而乔纳斯兄弟全戴过守贞戒指 1062 00:52:21,805 --> 00:52:23,640 ‪我知道这是吐槽大会 1063 00:52:23,723 --> 00:52:26,017 ‪你们觉得我要吐槽他们 1064 00:52:26,101 --> 00:52:29,145 ‪我要在这里建立一个吐槽标准 1065 00:52:29,229 --> 00:52:32,148 ‪守贞戒指不是好主意 1066 00:52:33,149 --> 00:52:37,404 ‪它是标志着你拙劣可笑到 ‪让人脚趾蜷缩 1067 00:52:38,947 --> 00:52:43,326 ‪但请记住 它不只是标志 1068 00:52:43,410 --> 00:52:46,538 ‪它还关乎信仰和原则 1069 00:52:46,621 --> 00:52:49,708 ‪关乎你的表态 你要做出表率 1070 00:52:50,125 --> 00:52:53,336 ‪听着 乔乔纳斯不只 ‪把手指伸到蠢金属环中 1071 00:52:53,420 --> 00:52:55,380 ‪他的手指还伸进过合作明星 1072 00:52:55,463 --> 00:52:59,759 ‪女演员 甚至一两个超级名模 1073 00:53:05,807 --> 00:53:09,686 ‪老实说 乔和守贞戒指这事 1074 00:53:09,769 --> 00:53:11,229 ‪就像现代的灰姑娘故事 1075 00:53:11,313 --> 00:53:14,983 ‪乔多次尝试 想找到 ‪他守贞戒指匹配的地方 1076 00:53:15,066 --> 00:53:17,986 ‪最终我匹配上他的手指了 1077 00:53:22,782 --> 00:53:25,702 ‪还有一点像灰姑娘的故事 ‪他尝试过的大多数姑娘 1078 00:53:25,785 --> 00:53:27,203 ‪都在迪士尼旗下 1079 00:53:28,496 --> 00:53:29,331 ‪噢 1080 00:53:30,665 --> 00:53:35,378 ‪我当然爱他 ‪我为了跟他在一起搬到了美国 1081 00:53:36,338 --> 00:53:38,131 ‪不是没遇到困难 1082 00:53:38,214 --> 00:53:41,134 ‪两国使用的词语不同 对我有点困难 1083 00:53:41,217 --> 00:53:43,094 ‪美国叫西葫 1084 00:53:43,178 --> 00:53:44,846 ‪英国叫小胡瓜 1085 00:53:44,930 --> 00:53:48,141 ‪美国称路边的突起为人行道 1086 00:53:48,224 --> 00:53:50,018 ‪英国称其为行人道 1087 00:53:50,101 --> 00:53:52,771 ‪有趣的是 美国称 ‪《摇滚夏令营》的续集 1088 00:53:52,854 --> 00:53:54,981 ‪为《摇滚夏令营2》 1089 00:53:55,065 --> 00:53:57,609 ‪英国称其为大烂片 1090 00:54:00,487 --> 00:54:01,321 ‪没错 1091 00:54:02,697 --> 00:54:05,825 ‪我开始演戏时 ‪我说过我永远不会跟演员约会 1092 00:54:05,909 --> 00:54:08,954 ‪我看过《摇滚夏令营2》后 ‪我知道跟乔约会没事 1093 00:54:11,039 --> 00:54:13,416 ‪认识这些人简直是我人生的高光时刻 1094 00:54:13,500 --> 00:54:16,628 ‪凯文很棒 尼克就是尼克 1095 00:54:19,923 --> 00:54:21,299 ‪乔 我很爱你 1096 00:54:21,383 --> 00:54:24,636 ‪我爱你们是因为无论你们有多成功 1097 00:54:24,719 --> 00:54:26,805 ‪你们始终保持新泽西本色 1098 00:54:26,888 --> 00:54:29,474 ‪我知道你们肯定是新泽西人 ‪因为你们的嗓音 1099 00:54:29,557 --> 00:54:31,893 ‪跟《黑道家族》的 ‪硬汉新泽西老大一样 1100 00:54:32,310 --> 00:54:34,813 ‪我开玩笑 你们跟硬汉不沾边 ‪也毫无嗓音可言 1101 00:54:36,439 --> 00:54:37,983 ‪我真的很想参与这次活动 1102 00:54:38,066 --> 00:54:40,318 ‪因为乔纳斯兄弟是个很好的乐队 1103 00:54:40,402 --> 00:54:43,655 ‪尽管每个人跟你都不这么说 1104 00:54:45,240 --> 00:54:46,157 ‪我爱你们 1105 00:54:46,783 --> 00:54:48,576 ‪咱们后台和圣诞再见 1106 00:54:48,660 --> 00:54:51,413 ‪乔 不用等我 皮特戴维森 ‪塞给我了他的电话号码 1107 00:54:51,496 --> 00:54:52,414 ‪所以... 1108 00:54:54,290 --> 00:54:58,003 ‪大家掌声鼓励索菲特纳！ 1109 00:54:59,879 --> 00:55:01,131 ‪北境女王 1110 00:55:01,756 --> 00:55:04,634 ‪太棒了 爱你 1111 00:55:06,469 --> 00:55:07,387 ‪讲得好！ 1112 00:55:09,556 --> 00:55:11,433 ‪乔 你预想到这一切了吗？ 1113 00:55:11,516 --> 00:55:12,976 ‪菲尔医生还在吗？ 1114 00:55:15,562 --> 00:55:16,896 ‪你们家的体育精神都很好 1115 00:55:16,980 --> 00:55:19,524 ‪今晚我们明白了 1116 00:55:20,191 --> 00:55:23,445 ‪没人能像家人那样直击痛点 1117 00:55:24,070 --> 00:55:27,073 ‪该兄弟间一个接一个 1118 00:55:27,157 --> 00:55:28,241 ‪互相吐槽了 1119 00:55:30,076 --> 00:55:31,327 ‪-好 ‪-开始吧 1120 00:55:31,911 --> 00:55:35,290 ‪我们准备了一个板子 ‪上面列出了你们生活的 1121 00:55:35,373 --> 00:55:36,207 ‪多个方面 1122 00:55:36,291 --> 00:55:38,209 ‪你每个人依次上来 1123 00:55:38,293 --> 00:55:40,503 ‪选其中一些 然后随意吐槽 1124 00:55:40,587 --> 00:55:42,380 ‪咱们按从年长到年少的顺序 1125 00:55:42,464 --> 00:55:44,174 ‪凯文 你先上 1126 00:55:44,257 --> 00:55:45,175 ‪-好 ‪-来吧 1127 00:55:49,804 --> 00:55:50,930 ‪大家好吗？ 1128 00:55:51,931 --> 00:55:54,267 ‪-哇！ ‪-加油！ 1129 00:55:54,851 --> 00:55:57,187 ‪那我就先选“单飞生涯” 1130 00:55:57,270 --> 00:55:58,480 ‪先说乔 1131 00:55:59,522 --> 00:56:02,901 ‪我知道你上台前有个固定仪式 1132 00:56:02,984 --> 00:56:06,029 ‪你登台前要扇自己巴掌 1133 00:56:06,112 --> 00:56:06,946 ‪真的 1134 00:56:07,030 --> 00:56:08,448 ‪这实在太巧了 1135 00:56:08,531 --> 00:56:11,451 ‪因为我每次听你的歌之前 1136 00:56:11,534 --> 00:56:13,161 ‪都得先让车撞一下 1137 00:56:14,954 --> 00:56:18,750 ‪说真的 我喜欢 ‪你在DNCE的每首歌 1138 00:56:18,833 --> 00:56:21,628 ‪从最热单曲《海边蛋糕》到... 1139 00:56:30,470 --> 00:56:32,263 ‪没有别的了 1140 00:56:32,347 --> 00:56:34,849 ‪你还试过表演 1141 00:56:34,933 --> 00:56:37,685 ‪乔在《超级名模2》中演得多棒？ 1142 00:56:38,186 --> 00:56:39,187 ‪没错 1143 00:56:39,270 --> 00:56:40,688 ‪就是这个形象 1144 00:56:42,315 --> 00:56:43,858 ‪不 等等 1145 00:56:43,942 --> 00:56:47,112 ‪这只是乔在万圣节 ‪打扮成电影里的角色 1146 00:56:48,446 --> 00:56:51,116 ‪我想找到电影剧照 1147 00:56:51,199 --> 00:56:56,204 ‪但他的角色太小了 ‪以致于没有影像证据 1148 00:56:59,165 --> 00:57:01,167 ‪但演得不错 乔 我们非常为你骄傲 1149 00:57:03,711 --> 00:57:06,464 ‪尼克 不用这么害怕 1150 00:57:07,215 --> 00:57:08,800 ‪自从我请你在《嫁给乔纳斯》中 1151 00:57:08,883 --> 00:57:10,426 ‪露脸后 我还没见过你这么低落 1152 00:57:12,595 --> 00:57:14,347 ‪尼克 你带来了三重威胁 1153 00:57:14,430 --> 00:57:16,307 ‪你能唱歌 能演戏 1154 00:57:16,391 --> 00:57:18,852 ‪还能再次威胁解散乐队 1155 00:57:22,355 --> 00:57:24,566 ‪这对我一点伤害都没有 1156 00:57:27,485 --> 00:57:30,071 ‪尼克很激动能上《周六夜现场》 1157 00:57:30,155 --> 00:57:32,157 ‪既作主持人 也作音乐嘉宾 1158 00:57:34,576 --> 00:57:37,495 ‪尼克终于能跟他最爱的人合作了 1159 00:57:37,996 --> 00:57:38,955 ‪即尼克乔纳斯 1160 00:57:40,665 --> 00:57:44,794 ‪不过吐槽放一边 我很开心我没单飞 1161 00:57:45,545 --> 00:57:48,256 ‪做你们的大哥是我人生中最大的快乐 1162 00:57:48,715 --> 00:57:49,799 ‪做你们俩的大哥 1163 00:57:49,883 --> 00:57:52,594 ‪当然与之并列的还有 ‪娶了这位漂亮姑娘丹妮尔 1164 00:57:53,094 --> 00:57:54,137 ‪我爱你 1165 00:57:55,930 --> 00:57:58,099 ‪还有我两个可爱女儿的出生 1166 00:57:58,766 --> 00:58:03,646 ‪还有登上《人物》杂志 ‪最性感男人榜单 1167 00:58:05,899 --> 00:58:07,692 ‪没错 你们现在可以鼓掌了 1168 00:58:07,775 --> 00:58:08,818 ‪我爱你们 1169 00:58:09,736 --> 00:58:10,612 ‪先生们 1170 00:58:11,571 --> 00:58:12,822 ‪吐槽完毕 1171 00:58:13,323 --> 00:58:15,533 ‪凯文乔纳斯 1172 00:58:16,743 --> 00:58:17,952 ‪干的好 小凯 1173 00:58:20,705 --> 00:58:21,539 ‪好了 1174 00:58:22,123 --> 00:58:26,002 ‪接下来上台的是乔乔纳斯 1175 00:58:26,085 --> 00:58:27,712 ‪-好啊 ‪-上吧 乔 1176 00:58:30,757 --> 00:58:31,883 ‪很好 1177 00:58:33,510 --> 00:58:34,385 ‪这就对了 1178 00:58:37,263 --> 00:58:38,139 ‪谢谢 1179 00:58:39,766 --> 00:58:42,477 ‪那我就选“童年”吧 1180 00:58:43,895 --> 00:58:46,022 ‪既然你第一个上 ‪那我就先吐槽你 凯文 1181 00:58:47,398 --> 00:58:49,400 ‪凯文 什么都是你第一个做 1182 00:58:49,484 --> 00:58:51,069 ‪凯文是第一个孩子 1183 00:58:51,861 --> 00:58:53,738 ‪他第一个毕业 1184 00:58:54,239 --> 00:58:55,615 ‪他第一个结婚 1185 00:58:56,199 --> 00:58:58,159 ‪他也是第一个被踢出乐队 1186 00:59:01,120 --> 00:59:04,082 ‪随着凯文长大 ‪他很快找到了自己的风格 1187 00:59:04,624 --> 00:59:06,834 ‪他总戴围巾 甚至在夏天都戴 1188 00:59:08,920 --> 00:59:12,507 ‪不是因为天冷 ‪而是因为作为20岁的摇滚明星 1189 00:59:12,590 --> 00:59:14,175 ‪他要遮挡自己没有唇印 1190 00:59:16,386 --> 00:59:18,137 ‪有时你很孤独 1191 00:59:18,221 --> 00:59:20,306 ‪录第一张专辑时 1192 00:59:20,390 --> 00:59:23,309 ‪凯文在卫生间的时间可疑地长 1193 00:59:23,393 --> 00:59:24,310 ‪一天还去好几次 1194 00:59:26,229 --> 00:59:29,983 ‪我们之后发现卫生间里 ‪有一堆《花花公子》 1195 00:59:31,651 --> 00:59:33,570 ‪那是凯文唯一一次单独行动 1196 00:59:36,990 --> 00:59:37,949 ‪正中靶心！ 1197 00:59:40,451 --> 00:59:42,662 ‪我很幸运有凯文这样的哥哥 1198 00:59:42,745 --> 00:59:44,205 ‪关于生活 他教了我很多 1199 00:59:44,914 --> 00:59:46,624 ‪比如 如果没有自己的生活也没关系 1200 00:59:49,127 --> 00:59:50,211 ‪嗨 尼克 1201 00:59:51,963 --> 00:59:53,965 ‪从小到现在 尼克的一切都没变 1202 00:59:54,048 --> 00:59:55,675 ‪甚至他小弟弟的尺寸 1203 00:59:58,136 --> 01:00:00,555 ‪尼克 如果不是你 ‪我们就成不了乐队 1204 01:00:01,097 --> 01:00:03,182 ‪我们只会是三个相亲相爱的兄弟 1205 01:00:03,266 --> 01:00:05,393 ‪也不会一直吐槽你的自负 1206 01:00:09,564 --> 01:00:11,482 ‪太好玩了！ 1207 01:00:12,775 --> 01:00:13,818 ‪我喜欢！ 1208 01:00:16,237 --> 01:00:18,239 ‪我只是很高兴再也不跟他们住一起了 1209 01:00:18,323 --> 01:00:20,033 ‪生活简单多了 1210 01:00:22,243 --> 01:00:24,829 ‪从尼克还是孩子开始 ‪他就一直是家里最严肃的人 1211 01:00:25,330 --> 01:00:28,875 ‪几乎跟他的大乳晕一样严肃 1212 01:00:31,919 --> 01:00:32,795 ‪是假的 1213 01:00:33,671 --> 01:00:34,547 ‪假新闻！ 1214 01:00:35,256 --> 01:00:36,132 ‪伪造的 1215 01:00:37,425 --> 01:00:39,969 ‪我现在就给你们看 没那么大 1216 01:00:40,595 --> 01:00:43,723 ‪我们都知道这图像经过处理了 ‪做成了表情包 1217 01:00:44,349 --> 01:00:45,558 ‪我们只是不知道谁处理的 1218 01:00:48,353 --> 01:00:49,479 ‪或者我们知道？ 1219 01:00:53,858 --> 01:00:55,735 ‪尼克年轻的身体里总是有老灵魂 1220 01:00:56,277 --> 01:00:58,196 ‪我得说比我们中任何人都成熟 1221 01:00:58,571 --> 01:01:01,282 ‪就算是现在 尼克 ‪也比他的美丽妻子朴雅卡小十岁 1222 01:01:01,366 --> 01:01:02,241 ‪她就在现场 1223 01:01:04,160 --> 01:01:06,537 ‪靠 这倒提醒了我 我们得赶快 1224 01:01:06,621 --> 01:01:07,455 ‪明天学校还有课 1225 01:01:07,538 --> 01:01:09,582 ‪我答应了朴雅卡 ‪要在宵禁前 把他送回家 1226 01:01:09,666 --> 01:01:12,710 ‪非常抱歉 我们马上带他走 1227 01:01:13,461 --> 01:01:17,173 ‪听着 我其实不相信 ‪所谓的老二综合征 1228 01:01:17,674 --> 01:01:20,510 ‪我其实过得挺好的 虽然凯文是我哥 1229 01:01:21,260 --> 01:01:23,012 ‪我弟是个小贱人 1230 01:01:26,557 --> 01:01:28,059 ‪很好了 丢麦吧 1231 01:01:28,142 --> 01:01:28,976 ‪太牛了 1232 01:01:31,979 --> 01:01:33,940 ‪为乔乔纳斯鼓掌 女士们先生们 1233 01:01:36,442 --> 01:01:37,402 ‪真是火力全开 1234 01:01:38,152 --> 01:01:41,155 ‪-最后但也绝对重要的是... ‪-基南！ 1235 01:01:41,239 --> 01:01:42,073 ‪基南！ 1236 01:01:42,782 --> 01:01:43,783 ‪讲得好 1237 01:01:43,866 --> 01:01:46,536 ‪我受够了！ 1238 01:01:47,704 --> 01:01:49,122 ‪请欢迎尼克乔纳斯 1239 01:01:51,958 --> 01:01:52,792 ‪乔 1240 01:01:53,835 --> 01:01:58,423 ‪我会给同学们看看我的乳头 ‪以证明乳晕没那么大 1241 01:02:02,343 --> 01:02:03,803 ‪来吧！ 1242 01:02:03,886 --> 01:02:06,264 ‪我一周内只有几天 1243 01:02:06,347 --> 01:02:07,932 ‪是个小贱货 1244 01:02:10,727 --> 01:02:13,020 ‪非常感谢大家过来见证 1245 01:02:13,104 --> 01:02:15,565 ‪乔纳斯兄弟的解散 1246 01:02:18,192 --> 01:02:19,736 ‪我们上一次解散时 1247 01:02:20,069 --> 01:02:21,112 ‪可没这么好玩 1248 01:02:21,779 --> 01:02:23,781 ‪皮特戴维森当时还不在呢 ‪我告诉你们 1249 01:02:23,865 --> 01:02:25,575 ‪Neflix也没付我们钱 1250 01:02:26,868 --> 01:02:28,911 ‪我们免费解散了 1251 01:02:29,829 --> 01:02:31,539 ‪哪个脑子正常的会这么做？ 1252 01:02:32,832 --> 01:02:35,293 ‪我们现在不会解散 我保证 1253 01:02:39,088 --> 01:02:40,339 ‪我们上次做到了 1254 01:02:41,174 --> 01:02:42,216 ‪乐队解散后 1255 01:02:42,759 --> 01:02:45,470 ‪我们能各自成长 追随自己的理想 1256 01:02:46,012 --> 01:02:48,806 ‪朝创意和艺术领域拓展 1257 01:02:48,890 --> 01:02:53,227 ‪比如 乔组了自己的乐队DNCE ‪这乐队很棒 1258 01:02:57,482 --> 01:02:58,649 ‪而凯文... 1259 01:03:04,405 --> 01:03:05,531 ‪凯文忙于... 1260 01:03:06,324 --> 01:03:08,826 ‪与丹妮尔结婚 组建美好家庭 1261 01:03:12,205 --> 01:03:14,999 ‪他们有两个女儿 ‪阿莱娜和瓦伦蒂娜 1262 01:03:15,082 --> 01:03:17,502 ‪但可悲的是 你们大多数人都不知道 1263 01:03:17,585 --> 01:03:19,295 ‪当在凯文开始组建家庭时 1264 01:03:19,378 --> 01:03:22,298 ‪他不得不搁置自己的副业 1265 01:03:22,924 --> 01:03:25,009 ‪你们可能要问 什么副业？ 1266 01:03:26,260 --> 01:03:28,513 ‪在乔纳斯乐队的早期 1267 01:03:28,596 --> 01:03:30,431 ‪也就是我们还带着守贞戒指时 1268 01:03:30,515 --> 01:03:33,476 ‪凯文开始了臭名昭著的副业 1269 01:03:33,559 --> 01:03:34,894 ‪来赚点小钱 1270 01:03:36,062 --> 01:03:37,897 ‪可不是音乐 1271 01:03:37,980 --> 01:03:38,856 ‪也不是演戏 1272 01:03:41,108 --> 01:03:42,360 ‪而是伴游服务 1273 01:03:43,611 --> 01:03:44,487 ‪什么？ 1274 01:03:44,904 --> 01:03:47,448 ‪别担心 他没有失贞 1275 01:03:49,242 --> 01:03:50,660 ‪他拿嘴服务而已 1276 01:03:55,414 --> 01:03:56,457 ‪抱歉 老爸 1277 01:03:57,959 --> 01:03:59,919 ‪拜托 我们都知道 ‪凯文不提供伴游服务 1278 01:04:00,002 --> 01:04:01,045 ‪他是处男！ 1279 01:04:06,092 --> 01:04:07,552 ‪我们都有自己的定位 1280 01:04:07,635 --> 01:04:09,011 ‪我害羞 1281 01:04:09,929 --> 01:04:11,097 ‪乔可爱 1282 01:04:11,722 --> 01:04:14,058 ‪凯文是处男 1283 01:04:15,601 --> 01:04:17,979 ‪但没关系 凯文 ‪你利用这个形象打捞特捞 1284 01:04:18,062 --> 01:04:19,063 ‪你表现得很好 1285 01:04:19,647 --> 01:04:21,399 ‪差不多在那段时间 1286 01:04:21,482 --> 01:04:24,110 ‪你的肥水也没流... 1287 01:04:26,070 --> 01:04:26,904 ‪外人手 1288 01:04:32,201 --> 01:04:34,370 ‪可乔却提供伴游服务 1289 01:04:35,580 --> 01:04:37,832 ‪只不过没人付钱给他 1290 01:04:40,042 --> 01:04:41,544 ‪他免费服务 1291 01:04:42,628 --> 01:04:45,256 ‪抱歉 乔 我不是想对你 ‪进行荡夫羞辱 我保证过我不会 1292 01:04:45,339 --> 01:04:47,216 ‪你这个肮脏的男妓 1293 01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:52,263 ‪但我很高兴你找到了真爱 1294 01:04:52,346 --> 01:04:53,306 ‪当然了 1295 01:04:57,393 --> 01:04:59,604 ‪凯文 这些年来 ‪作为已婚人士开拓出了 1296 01:04:59,687 --> 01:05:00,730 ‪你自己的一片天地 1297 01:05:00,813 --> 01:05:03,190 ‪但现在我们也要把这片天地夺走 1298 01:05:05,192 --> 01:05:07,778 ‪没关系 可能你还有真人秀这个领域 1299 01:05:07,862 --> 01:05:10,656 ‪你之前和你的妻子丹妮尔 ‪做了《嫁给乔纳斯》 1300 01:05:13,117 --> 01:05:16,662 ‪你还参加了一集《名人学徒》 1301 01:05:18,372 --> 01:05:20,041 ‪然后特朗普就开除了你 1302 01:05:22,501 --> 01:05:25,379 ‪这是我和特朗普唯一的共同点 1303 01:05:30,259 --> 01:05:31,969 ‪我爱你们 过来 1304 01:05:32,053 --> 01:05:33,346 ‪我们没要解散 1305 01:05:33,429 --> 01:05:34,347 ‪过来 1306 01:05:34,847 --> 01:05:36,557 ‪尼克乔纳斯 大家掌声鼓励 1307 01:05:36,641 --> 01:05:37,934 ‪很精彩 哥们 1308 01:05:38,851 --> 01:05:40,770 ‪很高兴刚才的吐槽不尴尬 1309 01:05:40,853 --> 01:05:42,897 ‪我们只想说非常谢谢 1310 01:05:43,773 --> 01:05:44,899 ‪索菲特纳 1311 01:05:46,317 --> 01:05:47,777 ‪丹妮尔乔纳斯 1312 01:05:48,903 --> 01:05:50,696 {\an8}‪朴雅卡乔普拉乔纳斯 1313 01:05:51,572 --> 01:05:56,702 {\an8}‪女士们先生们 ‪今天的乔纳斯兄弟吐槽大会到此结束 1314 01:05:56,786 --> 01:05:57,620 {\an8}‪晚安！ 1315 01:06:02,500 --> 01:06:05,211 {\an8}‪纪念品销售 来这儿买纪念品 1316 01:06:05,294 --> 01:06:06,879 {\an8}‪嗨 乔纳斯兄弟！先生们 1317 01:06:06,963 --> 01:06:11,133 {\an8}‪我能向你们介绍 ‪一些高端乔纳斯兄弟纪念品吗？ 1318 01:06:11,217 --> 01:06:13,177 {\an8}‪-我们什么都有 ‪-说到什么都有 1319 01:06:13,678 --> 01:06:15,596 {\an8}‪没有这个你的生命可不完整 1320 01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:18,683 {\an8}‪乔纳斯兄弟六件美发套装 1321 01:06:19,642 --> 01:06:20,518 {\an8}‪80美元 1322 01:06:20,601 --> 01:06:22,436 {\an8}‪80美元？就是一堆塑料而已 1323 01:06:22,520 --> 01:06:24,480 {\an8}‪是收藏品 1324 01:06:24,563 --> 01:06:26,440 {\an8}‪会值很多钱 1325 01:06:26,983 --> 01:06:28,275 {\an8}‪只等你们死了 1326 01:06:28,651 --> 01:06:33,114 {\an8}‪说到生活 这些乔纳斯兄弟拖鞋 1327 01:06:33,197 --> 01:06:34,281 {\an8}‪点亮了我的生活 1328 01:06:35,366 --> 01:06:38,035 {\an8}‪尼克 你知道的 ‪鞋的尺寸刚好适合你 1329 01:06:38,411 --> 01:06:41,872 {\an8}‪我的脚比它们还是略大点 1330 01:06:41,956 --> 01:06:43,874 {\an8}‪鞋的尺寸难以说清 不过没关系 1331 01:06:43,958 --> 01:06:46,544 {\an8}‪-就50美元 ‪-50美元？ 1332 01:06:46,627 --> 01:06:49,046 {\an8}‪50每只 这里有两只 1333 01:06:49,130 --> 01:06:52,717 {\an8}‪听着 谢谢你找到了 ‪这堆我们的旧纪念品 1334 01:06:52,800 --> 01:06:54,969 {\an8}‪并想转卖给我们 但我有点饿了 1335 01:06:55,052 --> 01:06:56,762 {\an8}‪我得去吃点东西 1336 01:06:56,846 --> 01:07:01,017 {\an8}‪你饿了？我也能满足你 ‪看 乔纳斯兄弟午餐盒 1337 01:07:02,184 --> 01:07:03,853 {\an8}‪我的女儿会喜欢这个 1338 01:07:03,936 --> 01:07:06,105 {\an8}‪给我15美元 我再附赠点零食 1339 01:07:06,188 --> 01:07:08,399 {\an8}‪我们会考虑的 我们得走了 1340 01:07:08,482 --> 01:07:10,443 {\an8}‪好吧 1341 01:07:10,526 --> 01:07:15,614 {\an8}‪这个怎么样 千真万确 ‪独一无二的尼克乔纳斯钱夹？ 1342 01:07:15,698 --> 01:07:17,324 {\an8}‪我觉得这就是我现在的钱夹 1343 01:07:17,950 --> 01:07:20,244 {\an8}‪我拉在休息室了 你拿了我的钱夹？ 1344 01:07:20,327 --> 01:07:22,955 {\an8}‪拿 借 无所谓 反正现在给你了 1345 01:07:23,956 --> 01:07:25,291 {\an8}‪给我200美元就好 1346 01:07:25,374 --> 01:07:26,751 {\an8}‪哥们 你开玩笑吗？ 1347 01:07:26,834 --> 01:07:28,627 {\an8}‪算了 拿去吧 1348 01:07:28,711 --> 01:07:30,880 {\an8}‪拿去吧 因为我喜欢你 1349 01:07:30,963 --> 01:07:33,215 {\an8}‪虽然你之前发的那歌... ‪再看看这个？ 1350 01:07:33,299 --> 01:07:37,470 {\an8}‪官方乔乔纳斯娃娃 1351 01:07:37,553 --> 01:07:41,932 {\an8}‪等等 《摇滚夏令营》衍生的 ‪尼克和凯文唱歌娃娃在哪儿？ 1352 01:07:42,600 --> 01:07:44,727 {\an8}‪人们很喜欢玩凯文娃娃的 1353 01:07:44,810 --> 01:07:46,395 {\an8}‪你就不停说给自己听吧 小凯 1354 01:07:47,563 --> 01:07:49,482 {\an8}‪还有一样 1355 01:07:50,816 --> 01:07:52,276 {\an8}‪我是你们的“舔狗” 1356 01:07:52,902 --> 01:07:55,029 {\an8}‪还是我唱得更好 还有其他类似的货 1357 01:07:55,112 --> 01:07:56,113 {\an8}‪-谢谢 ‪-好吧 1358 01:07:56,197 --> 01:07:57,073 {\an8}‪-行 ‪-再见 1359 01:07:57,156 --> 01:07:59,366 {\an8}‪我稍后可能会买几样 我会回来的 1360 01:07:59,450 --> 01:08:00,367 {\an8}‪好 1361 01:08:02,411 --> 01:08:07,416 ‪字幕翻译：徐姣