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Downloaded from
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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      [ambient music playing]       

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          [Celeste Bell]            
 My mother was a punk rock icon.   

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         People often ask me         
        if she was a good mum.       

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   It's hard to know what to say.   

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 Sometimes I think of an answer    
 she might have come up with.      

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       "A good mum?" she'd ask.      

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              How banal.             

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             How mundane.            

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     [ambient music continues]      

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       The funeral was surreal.      

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       [church bells ringing]       

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      My memory of it is a blur.     

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 All these people I'd never met,   

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 people who came to say goodbye    
 to Poly Styrene.                  

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         This famous person.         

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 Someone so far removed            
 from the mother I knew.           

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      I felt sick to my stomach.     

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         I wasn't ready to be        
            the care-taker           

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      of Poly Styrene's legacy.      

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        I'd just lost my mum.        

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        There was only me now.       

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       The only child she had.       

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          And now she'd gone         
             and left me             

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        to deal with it alone.       

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             Thanks, Mum!            

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      ["Germfree Adolescence"       
      by X-Ray Spex playing]        

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       I know your antiseptic      

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    Your deodorant smells nice    

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  I'd like to get to know you    

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          You're deep frozen        
            Like the ice            

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  She's a germ-free adolescent  

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  Cleanliness is her obsession  

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      Cleans her teeth             
     Ten times a day               

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              Scrub away            
       Scrub away, scrub away       

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            The S.R. Way           

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          [waves crashing]          

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            [Celeste]               
         My mother taught me         
          to love the sea,           

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 for water is the beginning        
 and end of life on this Earth.    

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       I find a kind of solace       
     in retracting her footsteps,    

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      barely visible as they are     
        in the sands of time.        

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       [lively music playing]       

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           [Poly Styrene]           
   "July 3, 1976.                   

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            Hastings Pier.           

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           It's my birthday          
     and I'll party if I want to.    

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           Nineteen today.           
      What a birthday surprise.      

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         Tacky Day-Glo sign,         
            Sex Pistols,             

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        market traders,              
        all my Freudian peers,       

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   cockles, winkles and mussels.    

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      Never did like shellfish."     

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     [indistinct conversations]     

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         "I stand centrepoint        
     in an almost empty ballroom.    

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    Three Swedish babes             
    stared at Johnny."              

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     [punk rock music playing]      

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      [cheering and whistling]      

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       [ambient tone playing]       

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            [Celeste]               
       It took me a long time        
      to go through her things.      

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       It was all too painful.       

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        And there was so much        
         to sort through...          

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   Photos, lyrics, albums.          

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           Things of value           
       and cultural importance.      

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       But I couldn't face it.       

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            So, I didn't.            

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   I had her ashes in a box, too.   

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       I kept it in a wardrobe.      

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            She wanted me            
        to take them to India.       

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         But I couldn't face         
            that, either.            

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00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,360
       It was about five years       
           after she died            

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          that I decided to          
        go through everything.       

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 I was blown away                  
 by her artistry.                  

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   She did all the artwork          
        for the band herself.        

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      I enjoyed piecing together     
     all the parts of her puzzle.    

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          Building a picture         
     of who she'd been before me.    

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          [presenter 1]             
         X-Ray Spex are one          
        of the best exponents        

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        of the so-called punk        
         or New Wave music.          

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        Vocalist Poly Styrene        
          is the punkiest.           

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          ["Art-I-Ficial"           
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

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          [presenter 2]             
     Poly Styrene chose her name     
       from the yellow pages.        

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     Otherwise Marianne Elliott,     
        aged 19 from Brixton,        

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           she's thought of          
          by the music press         

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         as one of the most          
       interesting songwriters       

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   to surface from the New Wave.    

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       I know I'm artificial       

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            But don't put           
          The blame on me           

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  I was reared with appliances  

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       In a consumer society       

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          [interviewer 1]           
    One lady that's been causing    

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        a lot of controversy        
        right around London,        

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        is a lady I've got          
        in front of me now,         

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       a Miss Poly Styrene.         
      Welcome to the program.       

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       The name Poly Styrene,       

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        was it given to you         
      by a publicist, or what?      

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   No, I thought I'd use the name   
     of something around today,     

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    you know, something plastic     
          and synthetic.            

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         and I just looked          
        in the yellow pages         

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         and then I saw it.         

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      -[interviewer 1] Really?      
               -Yeah.               

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          [interviewer 1]           
       So that's how the name       
   Poly Styrene finally was born,   

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       -from the yellow pages       
            phone book.             
               -Yeah.               

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          [interviewer 1]           
             Oh, wow.               

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          [Poly Styrene]            
        It sounded alright,         

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       'cos I thought it was        
   a send up of being a pop star.   

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 It was like a little figure,      
 not me, being Poly Styrene.       

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     Just plastic, disposable.      

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       That's what pop stars        
       sort of meant to me,         

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00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:10,960
      so therefore I thought        
    I might as well send it up.     

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            [Celeste]               
      Long before Poly Styrene,      
     there was Marianne Elliott.     

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00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,360
       Like all good heroines,       

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       my mother cut her teeth       
        on a tough childhood.        

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      A so-called "baby boomer"      
            born in '57,             

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 and times, they were a-changing   
         in post-war Britain.        

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          ["Silly Billy"            
      by Mari Elliot playing]       

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          [Poly Styrene]            
      "Who am I? What the hell,      

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   I'm just an ordinary tough kid   

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 from an ordinary tough street."   

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           [Hazel Emmons]           
       We grew up in this estate     
     which was called Gosling Way.   

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         It was one of those         
        old building estates,        

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         where, in our flat,         

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            we had a bath            
   in the kitchen with a lid on.    

121
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           So there was not          
         a separate bathroom.        

122
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         There was coal fires        

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 in the main sitting room          
 and one of the bedrooms,          

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       and in the other bedroom      
     there wasn't any fire at all.   

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        We knew we were poor,        

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 but the benefit system            
 wasn't as such as it is today,    

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              and my mum             
        had to work full time.       

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      She was a legal secretary.     

129
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           And so in a way,          

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        we were kind of like         
      the first latch-key kids.      

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      [ambient music playing]       

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             [Celeste]              
           My nanny, Joan,           
      was a second mother to me.     

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        She looked after me         
        when Mum couldn't.          

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      She looked after everyone,     

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        a true matriarch.            

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00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:53,640
   She was well spoken, upright,    

137
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        but at the same time,        
     something of a free spirit.     

138
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    [swing style music playing]     

139
00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,760
        She met my grandfather       
             at a dance.             

140
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,520
          She was surprised          
       when he approached her.       

141
00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:09,560
             She wasn't              
       used to male attention.       

142
00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:14,680
     When he asked her to dance,     
      her heart skipped a beat.      

143
00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:18,000
   She thought he had the darkest   

144
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:20,560
 and saddest eyes                  
 she'd ever seen.                  

145
00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,240
 A real dapper chap, too.          

146
00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:27,280
          Suited and booted          
        with impeccable style.       

147
00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:31,440
          [Poly Styrene]            
         "Black is beautiful.        
         White is all right.         

148
00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:34,800
       You're half-caste girl,       
         Do you wanna fight?         

149
00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:38,240
              Black girl             
       carries her flick knife.      

150
00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:40,480
         Will she cut me up          
        for being half white?        

151
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:42,840
 The national front are after me. 

152
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,600
          I'm infiltrating,          
           can't you see?"           

153
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,240
      [ambient music playing]       

154
00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:52,480
             [Celeste]              
        My mum was half-caste,       

155
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:55,240
          I'm quarter-caste,         

156
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:57,800
 my cousin's three-quarter caste. 

157
00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:01,520
               Even when             
     I was growing up in the '90s,   

158
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,880
   these were the kinds of terms    
 people would use to describe you 

159
00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,400
       if you were mixed race.       

160
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,320
   It annoyed the hell out of me,   

161
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:13,160
 and I know it upset my mum, too. 

162
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,320
          It's like saying           
       you're not quite whole,       

163
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:21,280
             you're just             
      a part-person, a fraction.     

164
00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:28,360
          [Hazel Emmons]            
          My mum never had           
         no friends as such,         

165
00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:32,680
      because they just saw her      
       as a black man's whore.       

166
00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:34,760
   It was bad enough                
   being a single mother.           

167
00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:38,200
        Being a single mother        
       with half-black children      

168
00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:40,600
      was absolutely "Hey, hey!"     

169
00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:43,800
          You know, the white        
 community shunned Nanny, really. 

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          [crowd chanting]          
      Join the National Front!      

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00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:48,760
        The National Front!         
        The National Front!         

172
00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:50,240
      Join the National Front!      

173
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:52,640
        The National Front!         
        The National Front!         

174
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:55,920
          [Poly Styrene]            
         When a white person         
     looks at a mixed-race child,    

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         they think, "My God,        

176
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            a white person           
      went with a black person,"     

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           and vice versa.           

178
00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,600
 It's their genes, really,         
 trying to preserve themselves,    

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 because they see us as a threat   
   to their genetic existence.      

180
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          [crowd shouting]          

181
00:12:14,840 --> 00:12:17,520
          [Hazel Emmons]            
        There were some nasty        
         remarks sometimes.          

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      I remember her coming home     
       with bruises on her legs      

183
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,240
   where the boys had kicked her.   

184
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:27,640
          She was a fighter,         

185
00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:29,640
 if you said something to her,     
 she won't keep her mouth shut.    

186
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:31,560
             She's gonna             
       answer you back and say.      

187
00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,800
           [Don Letts]              
     That whole mixed-race thing     

188
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     would have been a fairly new    
      phenomena in this country.     

189
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,800
   There was no social experiment   

190
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,240
     for black-and-white couples     
            having kids.             

191
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:45,080
 And consequently,                 
 their kids were very confused.    

192
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,560
      At school, you'd be like,      

193
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:48,800
 "What side should you play on?"   

194
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:52,320
          [Rhoda Dakar]             
        The attitude was that        

195
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,280
          you weren't ever           
         really black enough         

196
00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:56,560
           and you weren't           
        light-skinned enough.        

197
00:12:56,560 --> 00:12:58,360
              You know,              
     you were obviously not white    

198
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,080
     and you weren't black enough    

199
00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:01,880
             to be part              
       of the black community.       

200
00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:06,560
          [Poly Styrene]            
        The black kids there,        
         they could all say,         

201
00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:09,040
            "We're black,            
     we can all stick together."     

202
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,720
   "We don't like white people."    

203
00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,640
        "I could never go out        
         with a pork head."          

204
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:17,000
   But if you're half-caste         
        and you're with them,        

205
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,360
     you don't really feel that,     

206
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,640
             'cos, like,             
       your mum might be white.      

207
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,360
             And they're             
      slagging off white people.     

208
00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,800
             And if you              
       go with the white kids,       

209
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:27,840
 you have to reject your father.   

210
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             [Celeste]              
             My Grandad,             
         Osman Mohammad Said,        

211
00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,480
    wasn't around much              
    when she was a kid.             

212
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,880
            You could say            
         they were estranged.        

213
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:42,400
     He spent his childhood years    

214
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:45,520
             as a nomad              
      in the Somali hinterland.      

215
00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:50,080
   Then he made his way to Yemen    
        to seek his fortune,         

216
00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:55,520
        ending up as a stowaway      
 on a British merchant navy ship. 

217
00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,040
        He worked his passage        
          around the world,          

218
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:02,040
 finally ending up                 
     in the docklands               

219
00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:04,040
        of London's East End.        

220
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,680
        My mum came to resent        

221
00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,400
            always having            
       to answer the question,       

222
00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:13,920
        "Where are you from?"        

223
00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:17,520
        She was a Londoner,          
          born and bred.             

224
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,240
       But she was also brown,       

225
00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:22,640
          so her Britishness         
        was always questioned.       

226
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:26,760
      In the end, she started to     
         question it herself.        

227
00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:29,800
               She had               
      this yearning for Africa.      

228
00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:32,240
       She used to dream about       

229
00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:34,720
            running away             
     from dreary, soggy England,     

230
00:14:35,680 --> 00:14:37,840
   where she never felt at home.    

231
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,320
          [Poly Styrene]            
      "I wanna go back to Africa     

232
00:14:42,320 --> 00:14:44,280
        and find my heritage.        

233
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:47,440
 I wanna learn about the warrior   

234
00:14:47,440 --> 00:14:49,640
      and how my ancestor lived.     

235
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:52,080
          'Cos all I've seen         
          is 'Jungle Book',          

236
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,320
              and I know             
     that ain't the way it looks.    

237
00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:57,960
     I grew up on 'Tarzan', too.     

238
00:14:58,680 --> 00:14:59,760
           What can he do?           

239
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:02,040
           What can you do?          

240
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:05,000
       I'm gonna cross Ethiopia      

241
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,840
      and see that ancient land.     

242
00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:10,720
     And then I'll go to Somalia,    

243
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,800
      barefoot across the sand."     

244
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:17,000
           [traditional             
       Somali music playing]        

245
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:25,400
            [Celeste]               
            Hardly anyone            
       knew my mum was Somali.       

246
00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:28,120
 I mean, most people in the '60s   

247
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:31,880
         knew next to nothing        
 about Somalia or Somali people.   

248
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:35,720
     Even when I was growing up,     
            they didn't.             

249
00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,320
           [Ifrah Ahmed]            
           When I found out          
          that Poly existed,         

250
00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:41,760
           that was, like,           
      such a validation for me.      

251
00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:45,640
   I have a Somali punk icon        
            to look up to?           

252
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:51,520
         [Kinsi Abdulleh]           
   I was interested in her story    
     because of the difficulties     

253
00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:54,480
        when you're growing up       
          between cultures.          

254
00:15:55,400 --> 00:15:57,440
   When you come to a community,    

255
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,200
       you always want to learn      
           about the people          

256
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,760
     who've been here before you.    

257
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:04,640
          Who've pioneered           
        and kicked doors down        

258
00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:08,200
         and flattened walls         
       for us to come through.       

259
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:12,480
    Identity, that's one of the     

260
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,280
         current problems           
    at the moment, is identity.     

261
00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:17,240
           People try to            
      identify with something.      

262
00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:19,200
 Everybody's looking desperately   

263
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:21,200
        to try and identify         
          with one thing            

264
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:23,720
      instead of themselves,        
   and that's what that's about.    

265
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:29,240
 Identity! One, two, three, four! 

266
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,600
            ["Identity"             
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

267
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:47,240
        Identity is the crisis      
           Can't you see?           

268
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:51,240
              Identity             

269
00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:54,000
              Identity             

270
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:57,080
    When you look in the mirror    
       Do you see yourself?         

271
00:16:57,080 --> 00:17:00,080
         Do you see yourself        
         On the TV screen?          

272
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,280
         Do you see yourself        
         In the magazine?           

273
00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:07,000
        When you see yourself       
      Does it make you scream?      

274
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:09,160
         [Pauline Black]            
      Obviously, identity meant      
          something to her,          

275
00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:09,600
         because of the song.        

276
00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:13,640
        It was not only,             
        I feel, talking about        

277
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:15,640
       women within rock music,      

278
00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,840
      it was also talking about      

279
00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:20,440
 how many black women did you see 

280
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:24,200
         on the front covers         
        of fashion magazines?        

281
00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:26,840
      It was, in a way I guess,      

282
00:17:26,840 --> 00:17:29,880
          up to us to carve          
         our own identities.         

283
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:34,240
           [Bruno Wizard]           
   She was a woman of colour,       
      working within an industry     

284
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:38,040
 full of white middle-class men    
 that had it all their own way.    

285
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,560
   It's really important            
   that people get that.            

286
00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:50,400
             [Celeste]              
       When you're mixed-race,       
      it's hard not to feel like     

287
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:52,840
        an outsider looking in       
            half the time.           

288
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:56,680
         You often feel like         
      you don't belong anywhere.     

289
00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:00,080
 But that can be liberating, too. 

290
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,840
            I think my mum           
 got to the point where she said, 

291
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:05,640
         "I'm gonna carve out        

292
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:07,600
              a place in             
        the world for myself."       

293
00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:10,640
          And you know what?         
               She did.              

294
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,520
          [interviewer 1]           
   The daily papers and the media   

295
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:14,960
            refer to you            
        as a bit of a rebel.        

296
00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:19,640
 Um, do you think you're a rebel   
 in today's society?               

297
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:23,600
           I mean, yeah,            
    I suppose I am a bit really.    

298
00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:25,560
       -[interviewer 1] Yeah?       
       -[Poly Styrene laughs]       

299
00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:30,040
          ["I Am A Poseur"          
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

300
00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:40,960
            I am a poseur           
          And I don't care          

301
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:43,680
  I like to make people stare    

302
00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:45,960
            I am a poseur           
          And I don't care          

303
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,440
  I like to make people stare    

304
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,200
           [Rhoda Dakar]            
             Back then,              

305
00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:52,200
        it was fairly unusual        

306
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:53,320
           to be bi-racial.          

307
00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:56,720
              In a way,              
       we were embraced by punk      

308
00:18:56,720 --> 00:19:00,080
       and we were part of punk      
     because it was full of people   

309
00:19:00,120 --> 00:19:01,640
       who nobody else wanted.       

310
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,480
       We were welcome because       
      we were already outsiders.     

311
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:10,000
       [Helen McCookerybook]        
           I first saw Poly          
           at World's End.           

312
00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:11,760
   She had a little stall there.    

313
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:14,560
            This was just            
        on the very, very edge       

314
00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:16,120
     of punk beginning, actually.    

315
00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:18,360
      And she was sitting there      
             wearing...              

316
00:19:18,360 --> 00:19:21,400
      I think it was lime-green      
     and orange plastic clothes,     

317
00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:24,120
 and just looking really naughty. 

318
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:26,560
      [Vivienne Westwood]           
           It was to do              

319
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:27,760
          with the teenager          

320
00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:29,560
      and how brilliant we were.     

321
00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:32,360
      You know, just putting on      
         your dad's sweater          

322
00:19:32,360 --> 00:19:33,760
           and, you know,            
          some black tights          

323
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:36,240
           and running out           
      down the street and stuff.     

324
00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:39,280
 You know, it was something else. 

325
00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:42,160
             [Youth]                
             Even though             

326
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:43,440
        she was certainly part       

327
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:45,440
 of the punk explosion and scene, 

328
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:47,280
     she had a very distinct look    

329
00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,000
 that was very individual to her. 

330
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:51,200
        Her home-made clothes,       

331
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:53,760
       making your own records,      
        having your own shop,        

332
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:55,800
        doing it yourself,           

333
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:58,960
             I think that            
     social-political thing of DIY   

334
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,040
       did inform a lot of punk      
            and post-punk.           

335
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:05,160
       But the way Poly did it       
         was kind of unique.         

336
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:11,040
            [Celeste]               
         My mum was obsessed         
            with fashion.            

337
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,320
           She wrote songs           
       critiquing consumerism,       

338
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:17,880
             but she was             
       the ultimate shopaholic.      

339
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:21,800
         I pretty much hated         
         everything she wore         

340
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,600
         and felt embarrassed        
 to walk down the street with her 

341
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:25,840
          most of the time.          

342
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,640
   Especially when she forced me    

343
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:30,800
     into ridiculous outfits too,    

344
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:32,800
          like the matching          
         mother and daughter         

345
00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:35,720
 Laura Ashley phase she got into. 

346
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:38,480
        She liked nothing more       

347
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,120
        than traipsing around        
            the West End.            

348
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:42,280
     "Let's go window shopping,"     

349
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:43,480
              she'd say,             

350
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:44,280
          and I would groan.         

351
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:47,480
          I couldn't think           
       of anything more boring       

352
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:49,280
    than walking around             
    department stores.              

353
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:54,520
   It was almost as boring          
 as sitting in a recording studio 

354
00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:58,320
      or sitting in a restaurant     
 while she was being interviewed. 

355
00:20:59,240 --> 00:21:01,480
   What an ungrateful brat I was!   

356
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:04,280
        [pop music fades in]        

357
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,400
           [Poly Styrene]           
     Clothes are never really you.   

358
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:10,040
     That's why people wear them.    

359
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:14,080
       'Cos you can just create      
        an image with clothes,       

360
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:16,160
   they're just part of a façade.   

361
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:20,680
          Which is good fun          
       to play with sometimes.       

362
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,320
         [music fades out]          

363
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,200
            [Celeste]               
       By the time I was born,       

364
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:32,440
     Mum had left her punk phase     
           far behind her.           

365
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:35,280
           She always said           

366
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:37,280
            she never even           
      considered herself a punk,     

367
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:42,040
   that it was just a label,        
        coined by journalists.       

368
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:45,120
 At the same time, she recognised 

369
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:47,240
           that the scene            
       was the perfect vehicle       

370
00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:50,280
             for her own             
       creative transformation.      

371
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:55,760
 She placed an ad                  
 in the "Melody Maker" in 1976.    

372
00:21:56,920 --> 00:22:01,280
        It said, "Young Punks        
 Who Want to Stick it Together."   

373
00:22:02,760 --> 00:22:04,960
 She auditioned the band members, 

374
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,600
       and X-Ray Spex was born.      

375
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,640
       [guitar tuning noises]       

376
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:11,880
           [Lora Logic]             
      When she opened the door,      

377
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,600
          it was incredible.         

378
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,280
         She had this lovely,        
     beautiful smile on her face.    

379
00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:19,040
         And when I saw her,         

380
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:20,320
          I just felt like           
        I'd always known her.        

381
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:24,360
       There's definitely some       
 previous life connection there,   

382
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:27,040
        some soul connection.        

383
00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,720
            [Paul Dean]             
         I sat down with them        
          and there was Jak          

384
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:33,400
 playing guitar and Poly singing, 

385
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:36,320
       and they sang some songs      
         and said, "Join in."        

386
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,360
       They gave me a cassette,      
           I took it home,           

387
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,200
     they rang me up and said,      
     "Would you like to join?       

388
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,080
           We've got a gig           
        Saturday at the Roxy."       

389
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:47,840
           [Lora Logic]             
         Yeah, I just came in        

390
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,400
           and the outcome           
 was for anyone to hear me play.   

391
00:22:50,640 --> 00:22:53,120
 I didn't play very much.          
 He just was very quick.           

392
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:55,280
        Two girls together,          

393
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:57,480
       it's gonna be lucrative.      
               [laughs]              

394
00:22:59,360 --> 00:23:01,280
      [ambient music playing]       

395
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:04,320
            [Celeste]               
            Falcon Stuart            
        was my mum's manager.        

396
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:07,520
     He was also her first love.     

397
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:12,200
 She used to speak about him       
 all the time when I was a kid.    

398
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:16,400
         Sometimes she'd say         
     he was the love of her life,    

399
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:20,040
             other times,            
         that he'd ruined it.        

400
00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:24,840
          [Rina Vergano]            
      It wasn't exactly a secret     

401
00:23:24,840 --> 00:23:27,280
            but actually,            
         I wasn't quite sure         

402
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,040
      what the relationship was      
            with Falcon.             

403
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:30,680
            But it became            
        increasingly apparent        

404
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:32,240
            that they were           
          in a relationship,         

405
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:35,520
            and obviously            
     he was a lot older than her,    

406
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:37,280
      and was managing the band.     

407
00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:40,200
   He was a bit like her patron,    

408
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:43,880
       in a Renaissance sense,       
        more than a manager.         

409
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:48,160
               [man]                
   Do you live in a basement flat   
           in his house?            

410
00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:51,800
            -Yeah, why?             
        -I was just asking.         

411
00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:54,840
      I'm not trying to imply       
      you're having an affair       
           or anything.             

412
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:56,480
 No, I'm not saying that you are. 

413
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:58,560
 I just wondered if, what the...   

414
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:01,040
 What the significance of it was? 

415
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:03,960
   I think, well... It's like...    

416
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:06,520
         well, there he can         
          look after you,           

417
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:08,080
   so it's like a patriarch deal.   

418
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:10,040
      Do you know what I mean?      

419
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:13,000
     Oh, well, no, not really.      

420
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:15,720
          [Falcon Stuart]           
        Shall we go inside?         

421
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:18,440
          [Hazel Emmons]            
           He seemed to be           
          mesmerised by her.         

422
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:20,520
        She was different.           

423
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,160
         She wasn't the norm,        
          she was different.         

424
00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:26,080
             Definitely              
      I think he saw potential.      

425
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:28,000
              He saw it              
       from the very beginning.      

426
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:32,240
            I kind of had            
       a soft spot for Falcon.       

427
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,280
    I think he genuinely            
    cared for Marianne.             

428
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:37,880
     But it wasn't a relationship    

429
00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:41,400
         which could sustain         
       itself in a healthy way,      

430
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,680
       because it wasn't built       
          on a healthy way.          

431
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:45,880
      [ambient music playing]       

432
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:50,520
            [Celeste]               
        Every romance she had        
           ended in tears.           

433
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:55,080
             She longed              
      to be loved so very much,      

434
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,600
         but she could never         
        sustain a relationship       

435
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:00,040
       longer than a few years.      

436
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:04,040
     [ambient music fades out]      

437
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,360
          [Poly Styrene]            
       "The infamous Roxy Club       

438
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:12,440
           in Neal Street,           
      Covent Garden, London WC1.     

439
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:16,560
         X-Ray Spex manager          
         Falcon Stuart and I         

440
00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:18,440
 drop in to check out the talent. 

441
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:21,080
        Names that scream out.       

442
00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:23,200
     Billy Idol and Generation X,    

443
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:25,120
            The Buzzcocks,           
      Siouxsie and the Banshees,     

444
00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:27,080
 Captain Sensible and The Damned, 

445
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:29,360
 Johnny Moped and Chrissie Hynde. 

446
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,040
     Poly Styrene and X-Ray Spex     

447
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:33,520
              are booked             
       for the following week."      

448
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:37,240
       [Identity intro live]        

449
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:42,880
          [Jonathan Ross]           
     I'd never even been to a gig,   
             and by chance           

450
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:44,480
             and by great            
        good fortune and luck,       

451
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:47,040
     the first gig I ever went to    
           was X-Ray Spex.           

452
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:49,400
   I think it was 60p to get in,    

453
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:51,720
       went downstairs, waited,      
     expecting a tiny, dirty hall,   

454
00:25:51,720 --> 00:25:52,800
        nothing much going on.       

455
00:25:52,800 --> 00:25:54,520
   And then Poly Styrene came out   

456
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:57,160
       and it was... everything      
      changed for me right then.     

457
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,560
       I fell in love with her,      
     I fell in love with the band,   

458
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:02,880
 I fell in love with the music,    
 I fell in love with the idea.     

459
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:05,440
       [Poly Styrene singing]       

460
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:09,600
          [Hazel Emmons]            
 To see my sister on that stage,   

461
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:12,840
     and the energy and the power    

462
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:14,480
        and the expression...        

463
00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:17,640
               She just              
       was incredible to watch.      

464
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:23,480
    But her words are important     
       as well, aren't they?        

465
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,480
      If only for the titles,       

466
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:28,160
         even if you don't          
        hear all the words.         

467
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:30,600
     The titles are all very...     

468
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,200
           Trash really.            

469
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:41,200
          [Rina Vergano]            
          Her day consisted          
         of writing, largely,        

470
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:44,080
     and she'd write with a biro     

471
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:46,400
          on bits of paper           
         or in little books.         

472
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:48,840
       And sometimes she'd say,      

473
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:51,440
      "What do you think of this?    
 What do you think of this idea?" 

474
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:56,120
 [Thurston Moore]                  
 I mean, nobody else was really    
 singing so much about             

475
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:58,680
     what Poly was singing about.    

476
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:01,720
 It was either about being funny   

477
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,360
   or being kind of pseudo angry,   

478
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:06,720
        or making some kind of       

479
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:09,560
         artful points about         
     the banality of daily life,     

480
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,120
          which had its own          
       weird excitement to it.       

481
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:16,760
            [Celeste]               
         Some of my earliest         
           memories of Mum           

482
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:19,320
         are of her sitting          
      at her little typewriter,      

483
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:23,400
 totally absorbed                  
 in whatever she was writing.      

484
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:26,160
      There was rarely a moment      

485
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,680
           when she wasn't           
        working on a new song.       

486
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,600
              Sometimes              
     I felt jealous of her music.    

487
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:37,600
 Her songwriting robbed me         
     of the attention I craved.     

488
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:41,400
            My grandmother           
          would tell Mum off         

489
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:44,240
            for leaving me           
          to my own devices.         

490
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:49,000
        She'd come over              
       and find me half-dressed      

491
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,560
         with unbrushed hair,        
            causing chaos,           

492
00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:54,840
             drawing on              
       the walls with crayons,       

493
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:58,360
     while Mum was lost             
     in her own world.              

494
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:02,680
     Creative people don't always    
        make the best parents,       

495
00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:07,640
          and she certainly          
     neglected my needs at times.    

496
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:15,160
           [Poly Styrene]           
       Little girls should be       
        seen and not heard.         

497
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:20,200
       Oh bondage, up yours!        
       One, two, three, four!       

498
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,200
      ["Oh Bondage Up Yours!"       
      by X-Ray Spex playing]        

499
00:28:23,360 --> 00:28:25,440
          [Poly Styrene]            
            "I read a book           
          by William Wright,         

500
00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:27,240
            and discovered           
     a newfound sense of freedom.    

501
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:32,520
      Images of the Suffragettes     
       chained to the railings       
         of Buckingham Palace        

502
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,600
             shot across             
       my photographic memory.       

503
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,280
 A faded dream                     
 of Bowie's 'Suffragette City',    

504
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:41,240
   'Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am'    
         ringing in my ears.         

505
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:44,600
   Pictures of ball and chained     
           African slaves            

506
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:48,800
      were stored in my psyche,      
         in sepia of course.         

507
00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:52,080
             I replayed              
      the biblical epic 'Moses'      

508
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:53,680
      on the screen in my head.      

509
00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:58,240
      The story of the bondage       
     of the Israelites in Egypt.     

510
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,560
        I had an innate desire       
             to be free.             

511
00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:05,240
 To be free from unwanted desires 

512
00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:06,680
          seemed desirable."         

513
00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:11,320
         Bind me, tie me            
        Chain me to the wall        

514
00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:14,040
              I wanna be            
         A slave to you all         

515
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:17,040
       Oh bondage, up yours!       

516
00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:20,520
        Oh bondage, no more!       

517
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,600
       Chain-store chain-smoke      
         I consume you all          

518
00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:27,560
  Chain-gang chain-mail           
 I don't think at all             

519
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:30,360
       Oh bondage, up yours!       

520
00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:35,080
        Oh bondage, no more!       

521
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:37,280
          [interviewer 1]           
        Now recording-wise,         
      you've got a single out       

522
00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:39,200
   called "Oh Bondage Up Yours!".   

523
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:42,280
 Now that has struck               
 a bit of trouble                  
 as far as airplay is concerned.   

524
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:45,120
              -True?                
      -Yeah, well... [laughs]       

525
00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:47,320
      I expected that, really.      

526
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:50,520
           [Gina Birch]             
      A lot of men in the media      

527
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,640
          didn't want women          
       to step into that place,      

528
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:55,800
        to be given more power       

529
00:29:55,800 --> 00:29:58,000
             and more say            
         and more visibility.        

530
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:02,120
         [Vivien Goldman]           
     Everybody always talks about    
        "Oh Bondage Up Yours!"       

531
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:04,440
          because in a way,          
           just that sound           

532
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:07,640
            cuts through             
       a sort of glass ceiling       

533
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:11,440
        of what women singers        
      could do with their voice.     

534
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:14,440
          [Lucy O'Brien]            
     It was like a clarion call,     

535
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:17,080
     and it was the way she sang,    

536
00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:18,880
          it was so urgent,          

537
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:21,040
 and it was like a call to arms.   

538
00:30:22,040 --> 00:30:24,320
            It was like,             
          "I am so fed up!"          

539
00:30:26,040 --> 00:30:29,200
          [Poly Styrene]            
           "The journalist           
        Lucy Toothpaste asked,       

540
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:30,760
         'Are you liberated?'        

541
00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:32,720
          'Are you referring         

542
00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:34,480
     to "Oh Bondage Up Yours!"',     
              I asked.               

543
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:39,280
       Lucy replied, 'Well, yes.     
 Is it about women's liberation?' 

544
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:41,640
      'Yes and no,' I replied."      

545
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:45,040
      I was just talking about      
       all forms of bondage.        

546
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:46,880
             You know,              
    repression, everything else.    

547
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:49,880
 Sexual bondage stems from that,   
 so it's all part                  
 of the same thing.                

548
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:51,880
          It all depends            
    which way you interpret it.     

549
00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:54,080
          [interviewer 2]           
         So it's much to do         
        with sexual bondage?        

550
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:55,200
         Yeah, it's to do           
         with all bondage.          

551
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,480
          And it's bondage          
   because it hasn't been played,   

552
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:01,080
      that proves it as well,       
     hat is bondage in itself.      

553
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:05,000
 [Celeste]                         
 I think a lot of people assume    

554
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,000
   my mum was a staunch feminist,   

555
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:09,320
       because of "Oh Bondage",      

556
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:11,800
 because of the way she subverted 

557
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:14,080
             conventional            
         ideas of femininity.        

558
00:31:15,320 --> 00:31:17,880
          But I don't think          
       she felt any allegiance       

559
00:31:17,880 --> 00:31:20,840
            to a particular          
     political position or stance.   

560
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:23,480
       She wasn't ideological.       

561
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:27,320
         She was an observer         
        rather than a critic.        

562
00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:32,440
     There was even a part of her    
      that longed to be a wife,      

563
00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:34,680
         a stay-at-home mum.         

564
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,560
 She often complained about that, 

565
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:38,920
        that she had to work,        

566
00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:41,520
        to be a breadwinner          
           and a mother.             

567
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:46,040
         She secretly wished         
 she could be a lady of leisure.   

568
00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:50,480
          [crowd chanting]          

569
00:31:50,520 --> 00:31:53,880
          [Ana da Silva]            
 We didn't use the word feminist   
     very much at the beginning.     

570
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:56,840
 I was never afraid of the word.   

571
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,560
             But people              
      had their preconceptions,      

572
00:31:59,560 --> 00:32:02,880
     and when somebody asks you,     
           "Are you this,"           

573
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:06,720
      and you know that you are      
        your version of that,        

574
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:09,880
    but you're not the version      
    of the person who's asking.     

575
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:13,400
         [Pauline Black]            
     It's always very difficult,     

576
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:15,000
      and particularly for women     

577
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:16,400
            to make music            

578
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:19,400
             that has any            
       social commentary to it,      

579
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:21,200
        without it appearing,        

580
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,040
   particularly if you're black,    

581
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,640
    that you're the archetypal      
    young, angry, black female.     

582
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,920
          [Rina Vergano]            
        Poly had her own ideas       
          about everything.          

583
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:30,400
      She didn't follow fashion,     

584
00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:32,280
      she didn't follow trends.      

585
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:34,200
     And so, I think the idea of     

586
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:38,760
 anybody telling women what to do 
   when it came to their rights     

587
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:40,840
            was something            
        that she would oppose.       

588
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,240
         [Kathleen Hanna]           
           She talked about          
      people treating each other     

589
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,480
     like they were commodities,     

590
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:48,120
            not just women           
          being objectified,         

591
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:50,760
       but all different kinds       
     of people being objectified.    

592
00:32:51,760 --> 00:32:53,440
          And also not just,         
           "I'm the victim           

593
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:55,240
           and everybody's           
       taking advantage of me,"      

594
00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:56,800
 but writing in this way of like, 

595
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:59,520
           "I live off you           
       and you live off of me."      

596
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:02,160
 "And we're like, both doing it." 

597
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:05,000
        That's something that        

598
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,720
         as a feminist artist        
       is incredibly important.      

599
00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:13,680
        And I think these ideas      
 were so far ahead of their time. 

600
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,800
      [cheering and applause]       

601
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:18,360
           Good evening,            
      it's "Top of the Pops".       

602
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,120
      and we're gonna make you      
         feel like dancing.         

603
00:33:20,120 --> 00:33:21,480
     Here's the chart rundown.      

604
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:26,160
       ["Highly Inflammable"        
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

605
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:39,440
 -[cameraman] Okay, you're going. 
 -Alright, what are you gonna do   

606
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:41,320
       when we get rich, Jak?       

607
00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:44,640
   Well, I wanna buy a bubble car   

608
00:33:45,320 --> 00:33:46,920
       and a little house...        

609
00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:50,080
      And, uh... have a harem.      

610
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:51,760
           A harem, woah!           

611
00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:53,920
      Do you think X-Ray Spex       

612
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:56,440
         is gonna be bigger         
         than The Beatles?          

613
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:59,240
             -Um, yeah.             
          -Yeah. Oh, good.          

614
00:33:59,240 --> 00:34:02,280
            -Positive.              
       -Good, good. [laughs]        

615
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:04,480
   ["Highly Inflammable" playing]   

616
00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:08,280
           [Paul Dean]              
      We tried to be different.      
         We had saxophones.          

617
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:09,080
       We had a female singer.       

618
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:13,200
 And Poly's voice, she could       
 blow them out of the water.       

619
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:17,040
          [interviewer 1]           
     I mean, did you ever think     

620
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:21,120
           that you would           
    be able to walk out on stage    
      and send an entire club       

621
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:22,440
         off their brains?          

622
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:23,840
    No, I don't think like that.    

623
00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:25,240
 [interviewer 1]                   
 All going all around the place?   

624
00:34:26,640 --> 00:34:27,640
           [Paul Dean]              
           Richard Branson           
          of Virgin Records          

625
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:29,480
      wanted to sign X-Ray Spex.     

626
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:31,000
 And he was really, really keen.   

627
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:33,200
         But we went to EMI.         

628
00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:36,240
     [camera shutters clicking]     

629
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:39,240
          [Pauline Black]           
     The first time I can remember   

630
00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:40,560
       that I was aware of her       

631
00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:42,040
           was seeing her            
        on "Top of the Pops".        

632
00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:45,760
 It wouldn't really                
 even have occurred to me,         

633
00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:47,200
             at the time,            

634
00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:49,200
          that she was part          
        of the punk movement.        

635
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,560
 But there were things about her   

636
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,240
            that I thought           
      was the very best of punk.     

637
00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:58,560
   ["Highly Inflammable" playing]   

638
00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:01,480
          [Neneh Cherry]            
      I can definitely remember      

639
00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:02,880
         what happened to me         

640
00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:05,680
           the first time            
        I heard Poly's voice.        

641
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:09,840
 It was like an awakening for me. 

642
00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:12,040
 There were a lot of men around,   

643
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:16,000
     but obviously being a woman,    
       and being a young woman,      

644
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:20,120
        and I think Poly             
        being a woman of color       

645
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:21,360
            on that scene,           

646
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:22,600
          was another reason         
            why she became           

647
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:24,120
      a huge role model for me.      

648
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:27,720
 And I actually started singing    
 because of her,                   

649
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:29,160
       to be perfectly honest.       

650
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:32,000
          [Poly Styrene]            
          I was Tinkerbell         

651
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:35,680
       And you were Peter Pan      

652
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:43,840
             [Celeste]              
 In the '80s, when I was little,   

653
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:46,240
        Poly Styrene was still       

654
00:35:46,240 --> 00:35:48,080
        a pretty fresh memory        
          in the pop world.          

655
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:52,200
 and people would sometimes        
     stop my mum in the street      

656
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:54,560
         to tell her how much        
           they loved her.           

657
00:35:56,080 --> 00:35:58,840
      It didn't really faze me,      
            to be honest.            

658
00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:00,880
           It's all I knew.          

659
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:04,200
       Her reactions would vary      

660
00:36:04,240 --> 00:36:06,680
        according to whatever        
          mood she was in.           

661
00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:11,240
          She used to joke           
     that being famous but broke     

662
00:36:11,240 --> 00:36:13,800
   was the worst of both worlds.    

663
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:18,240
 She had all the attention         
 that comes with fame,             

664
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:21,840
        but lacked the means         
     to protect herself from it.     

665
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:26,560
       [Helen McCookerybook]        
 Seeing Poly on "Top of the Pops" 

666
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:27,840
      with braces on her teeth,      

667
00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:29,760
        just kind of laughing        

668
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:32,520
 and being a normal human being,   

669
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:33,760
       it was a really, really       

670
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:35,160
         powerful statement.         

671
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,200
            You could see            
        she'd made an effort,        

672
00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:41,440
 but she hadn't made that sort of 
      Twiggy and Clodagh Rodgers,    

673
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:42,560
           soft, floaty...           

674
00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:44,600
        She just wasn't floaty       

675
00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:46,400
             and that was            
      just such a bloody relief!     

676
00:36:48,240 --> 00:36:50,080
         [Vivien Goldman]           
     For the regular pop charts,     

677
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:51,240
 we were supposed to all           
 look like Joni Mitchell.          

678
00:36:52,400 --> 00:36:56,280
 Poly was funny looking,           
 with her braces and...            

679
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:59,720
          her unsmooth hair          

680
00:36:59,720 --> 00:37:03,160
   and her very futuristic style.   

681
00:37:05,040 --> 00:37:07,400
          [Rita Vergano]            
              I remember             
       when the album came out,      

682
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,120
        she was really annoyed       

683
00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:11,320
     because the record company     
     had slimmed her image down     

684
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:13,040
 on the front of the album cover, 

685
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:16,760
          and BP's as well.          
       And she was really angry      

686
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:19,120
            that somebody            
      had manipulated her image.     

687
00:37:20,240 --> 00:37:22,320
 "Why couldn't they                
 just put me on as I was?"         

688
00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:24,720
      [Poly Styrene laughing]       

689
00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:26,440
          [interviewer 2]           
           Do you dress             
       to make people laugh,        

690
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:28,200
       or to make them think?       

691
00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:31,600
         I mean, when you           
         put something on,          

692
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:32,760
      do you think the idea is      

693
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,320
          to make people            
       laugh with you, or...        

694
00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:38,720
 Somebody said to me that your... 

695
00:37:38,720 --> 00:37:40,200
    you know, your teeth braces,    

696
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:42,400
        somebody said it was        
      just a device, you know?      

697
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:43,360
                -No.                
           -A stage prop.           

698
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:45,800
        -It can't come off.         
            -Can't it?              

699
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:47,680
        No, not yet, anyway.        

700
00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:50,240
         -Is it screwed in?         
       -No, it's cemented on.       

701
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:53,240
 [interviewer 3]                   
 Then again, with those braces     
 on her teeth,                     

702
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:55,760
            Poly Styrene             
      is hardly Linda Ronstadt.      

703
00:37:56,840 --> 00:37:59,920
     [melancholy tones playing]     

704
00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:03,400
            [Celeste]               
         When Mum was young,         

705
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:06,000
     she was pretty confident       
     about the way she looked.      

706
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:09,760
             She'd never             
       been short of admirers.       

707
00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:13,600
          But the experience         
           of being famous           

708
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,120
          made her insecure.         

709
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,760
         The public scrutiny         
       over the way she looked       

710
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:20,840
       started to grate on her.      

711
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:25,520
      She felt like journalists      
        were celebrating her         

712
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:30,720
    by insinuating that she was     
    unattractive and overweight,    

713
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:32,960
         totally not getting         

714
00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:35,320
               what she              
       was trying to achieve by      

715
00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:40,280
     choosing not to over-expose     
     her voluptuous form on stage.   

716
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:46,520
          [Poly Styrene]            
       I don't want to become        
       totally self-indulgent,       

717
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:49,760
        because I write things       
 that other people can relate to. 

718
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,240
 If I get totally into myself,     
 I won't be able to do that.       

719
00:38:54,600 --> 00:38:57,440
   What I write will just become    
         a reflection of me,         

720
00:38:57,440 --> 00:38:59,920
       instead of a reflection       
         of everything else.         

721
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:03,240
    For some people that works,     
    but it's not what I'm about.    

722
00:39:04,680 --> 00:39:07,240
     I don't personally want to     
     indulge in my own fantasy,     

723
00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:09,600
          my own self-image.         

724
00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:12,800
     [melancholy tones playing]     

725
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:18,760
          [Pauline Black]           
       People make difficulties      

726
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,160
       within the entertainment      
              industry.              

727
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:23,760
              Certainly,             
        they make difficulties       

728
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:26,200
      for young women of colour,     

729
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,120
          there's absolutely         
         no doubt about that.        

730
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:31,760
   Young women of any ethnicity,    

731
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,800
               I think,              
       find it quite difficult.      

732
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:39,560
          [Hazel Emmons]            
     I think she needed time off.    

733
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:40,880
             She needed,             

734
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:43,320
           she definitely            
       needed respite periods,       

735
00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:46,600
       and as everybody knows        
        in the music business        
     and when you're setting up,     

736
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,000
         it's go, go, go, go,        

737
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:50,560
           and I think that          
 was totally destructive for her, 

738
00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:52,040
            it really was.           

739
00:39:56,800 --> 00:40:01,480
          [waves crashing]          

740
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:09,240
     [soft piano music playing]     

741
00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:11,400
          [Poly Styrene]            
      "My God, our name and fame     

742
00:40:11,400 --> 00:40:14,080
     is spread all over             
     the three worlds.              

743
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:18,400
         'We will be famous         
         just for one day.'         

744
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:19,880
             David Bowie.            

745
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:25,200
     'Everybody will be famous      
         for 15 minutes.'           

746
00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:26,880
             Andy Warhol.            

747
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:30,920
          'I am a cliché.'          

748
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:33,240
            Poly Styrene."           

749
00:40:37,240 --> 00:40:40,520
         This one is called         
         "Let's Submerge".          

750
00:40:41,720 --> 00:40:45,400
         ["Let's Submerge"          
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

751
00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,640
    It's dark and eerie            
   And it's really late            

752
00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:58,840
  Come on, kids                   
 Don't hesitate                   

753
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:01,880
          We're going down         

754
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:04,160
         To the underground        

755
00:41:04,880 --> 00:41:07,800
         We're going down          

756
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:09,840
          We're going down         

757
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:12,520
         To the underground        

758
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:16,880
         [Thurston Moore]           
           X-Ray Spex were           
        one of the first wave        

759
00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:18,800
      of punk bands from London      

760
00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:20,160
         to come to New York.        

761
00:41:21,240 --> 00:41:23,920
        In New York, punk rock       
          was a new sort of          

762
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:25,520
        youth culture division       
         that was happening,         

763
00:41:27,240 --> 00:41:30,600
     like investigating this more    
      sort of nihilist attitude,     

764
00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:33,080
    with the fallout of hippie      
    and the fallout of Vietnam,     

765
00:41:34,240 --> 00:41:37,080
        and this kind of             
        failed Utopian ideal.        

766
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:41,080
           [Paul Dean]              
       We went for a residency       
             in New York             

767
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,120
      at a venue called CBGB's.      

768
00:41:44,680 --> 00:41:48,040
         [Vivien Goldman]           
           CBGB's was like           
     a stinky toilet of a place.     

769
00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:52,400
            It was grungy            
       and ghastly and stinky.       

770
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:57,040
          [Poly Styrene]            
         It's dark and eerie        
        And it's really late        

771
00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:59,520
  Come on, kids                   
 Don't hesitate                   

772
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:02,160
          We're going down         

773
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:05,120
         To the underground        

774
00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:08,000
          We're going down         

775
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:10,520
          We're going down         

776
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:13,920
         To the underground        

777
00:42:15,720 --> 00:42:18,520
         [Thurston Moore]           
     Everybody below 14th Street,    
               New York              

778
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:19,600
           was at that gig.          

779
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:22,120
           'Cos everybody            
         would talk about it         

780
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:23,640
        throughout the summer.       

781
00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:28,080
     [indistinct conversations]     

782
00:42:28,800 --> 00:42:30,240
             [Paul Dean]            
            I can see now            

783
00:42:30,240 --> 00:42:33,520
        Paul Weller, The Jam,        
          and Debbie Harry,          

784
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:34,680
      sitting in the front row,      

785
00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:36,240
           cheering us on.           

786
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:39,120
      [cheering and whistling]      

787
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:42,040
       Who the fuck are you?        
       Who the fuck is this?        

788
00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:47,680
       Oh bondage, up yours!        

789
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:51,520
      ["Oh Bondage Up Yours!"       
       live version playing]        

790
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:53,400
         [Thurston Moore]           
         What was so exciting        
          about it was that          

791
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:55,880
            when they did            
       "Oh Bondage Up Yours!",       

792
00:42:55,880 --> 00:42:57,680
          Poly would hand me         
            the microphone           

793
00:42:57,680 --> 00:42:59,560
         to sing "Up yours".         

794
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:04,280
           It was somewhat           
     as if I was being knighted.     

795
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:06,280
         That was wonderful.         

796
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:13,800
        [funk music playing]        

797
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:20,840
            [Paul Dean]             
       When we were in New York      

798
00:43:20,840 --> 00:43:22,200
       we did two gigs a night.      

799
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:26,120
     In between times,              
     we went drinking,              

800
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:28,320
           went to parties,          

801
00:43:29,040 --> 00:43:30,320
            or met women.            

802
00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:34,240
   All kinds of things happened.    
            [chuckles]              

803
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:36,560
            It was totally           
         different to London.        

804
00:43:37,720 --> 00:43:39,240
         Everything was open         
           the whole time.           

805
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:42,240
   Now it seems, "Well, so what?"   

806
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:44,320
   But at the time, that was new.   

807
00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,160
           Put on the TV,            
        had tons of channels.        

808
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:48,240
      We only had three at home.     

809
00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:52,160
             In New York,            
       this is like the future.      

810
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,000
 Oh, is this "Tomorrow's World",   
 you think?                        

811
00:43:55,040 --> 00:43:56,600
 I don't know what program it is. 

812
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:02,160
      [dramatic music playing]      

813
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:04,480
          [narrator]                
       Unlike our grandparents,      

814
00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:06,280
 we live in a world that we made. 

815
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:10,440
            We are crammed           
 like battery hens with stimuli.   

816
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:13,280
   Capitalism, plus electronics,    

817
00:44:13,280 --> 00:44:15,240
        gave us a new habitat.       

818
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:16,640
         Our forest of media.        

819
00:44:17,440 --> 00:44:18,640
      [noise from television]       

820
00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:20,680
              [TV ad]               
 For the first time ever, save $5 

821
00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:23,440
      on our original, realistic     
        pocket weather radio.        

822
00:44:23,440 --> 00:44:25,560
             Now on sale             
        at Radio Shack stores,       

823
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:26,840
             only $10.95.            

824
00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:28,320
            Rain or shine,           

825
00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:30,600
       the exclusive, realistic      
        pocket weather radio.        

826
00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:32,800
      And there's only one place     
           you can find it.          

827
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:35,720
          [Poly Styrene]            
        It wasn't a conscious        
        attempt to be clever.        

828
00:44:35,720 --> 00:44:37,200
         I just thought that         

829
00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:39,480
           I'd write about           
       all these plastic things      

830
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:41,480
     because they seemed to be      
     creeping in more and more,     

831
00:44:42,720 --> 00:44:46,320
 which is why New York             
 totally blew me apart.            

832
00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:49,480
             [TV ad]                
        You'll look so pretty        
         and have such fun.          

833
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:52,120
      [ethereal music playing]      

834
00:44:52,120 --> 00:44:55,200
          [Poly Styrene]            
        I saw everything that        
        I'd been writing about       

835
00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:57,240
      in extreme, but for real.      

836
00:44:58,160 --> 00:45:01,640
     For them it wasn't a joke,     
     it was the way they lived.     

837
00:45:02,240 --> 00:45:04,280
 For me, it was all a joke.        

838
00:45:05,280 --> 00:45:07,560
            Play with it,            
   indulge it, have fun with it,    

839
00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:10,880
     because there's not really     
     that much of it over here.     

840
00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:14,720
       But when you go there,        
     it's so bad that you think,     

841
00:45:14,720 --> 00:45:16,800
           "God, if that's           
       what it's gonna be like,      

842
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:18,200
          I don't want it."          

843
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:22,520
           The weird thing           
        about all the plastic        

844
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,800
           is that people            
       don't actually like it.       

845
00:45:25,720 --> 00:45:26,520
   But in order to cope with it,    

846
00:45:27,720 --> 00:45:30,920
 they develop a perverse           
 kind of fondness for it,          

847
00:45:31,720 --> 00:45:33,240
         which is what I did.        

848
00:45:34,720 --> 00:45:36,600
               I said,               

849
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:39,440
     "Oh, aren't they beautiful      
     because they're so horrible."   

850
00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:43,320
          It's very perverse         
      and I realise that, and...     

851
00:45:44,240 --> 00:45:45,760
 that was what was so frightening 

852
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:47,160
           about New York.           

853
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,640
     [ethereal music continues]     

854
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:54,440
            [Celeste]               
            New York was             
       the start of something,       

855
00:45:55,720 --> 00:45:58,640
            a new feeling            
      she couldn't quite shake.      

856
00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:05,760
 She started to question           
 everything around her.            

857
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:09,440
         Was any of it real?         

858
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:14,360
            [Paul Dean]             
     I think the consumerism side    
             of New York             

859
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:16,920
         and the advertising         
        and the bright lights        

860
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:18,880
 and dazzling lights everywhere,   

861
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:20,680
      that did destabilize Poly      

862
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:23,480
          and affect the way         
        she was writing songs.       

863
00:46:24,800 --> 00:46:27,360
       -Are you gonna change,       
           do you think?            
          -I dunno really.          

864
00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:29,840
    I mean, we're just changing     
     already a bit, you know.       

865
00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:32,400
      Just in the sort of...        
     You know, just the songs.      

866
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,040
         It's just the way          
          everything else           

867
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:37,360
     reflects everything else,      
    and you're just part of it.     

868
00:46:37,400 --> 00:46:39,600
           So the music             
      reflects what you feel,       

869
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:42,400
        and also it reflects        
    what's happening around you.    

870
00:46:45,040 --> 00:46:48,280
            [Celeste]               
      The further she went down      
       the rabbit hole of fame       

871
00:46:48,320 --> 00:46:52,040
 and all the excess                
 that goes with that lifestyle,    

872
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,640
     the more absorbed she became    

873
00:46:54,680 --> 00:46:57,240
      in the dystopian futurism      
            of the world             

874
00:46:57,240 --> 00:46:59,560
          she was creating           
         through her lyrics.         

875
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:05,360
         I think the artifice        
           and insincerity           

876
00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:08,080
   she was surrounded by            
   in the music industry            

877
00:47:08,080 --> 00:47:09,760
           influenced her.           

878
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:14,360
            It influenced            
     her imagining of a plastic,     

879
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:16,480
         synthetic universe,         

880
00:47:17,240 --> 00:47:20,280
       where the natural world       
           has retreated,            

881
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:25,480
          the final triumph          
      of everything that's fake.     

882
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:29,160
     [ethereal music continues]     

883
00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:30,480
          [Poly Styrene]            
       "I muse over the future       

884
00:47:30,480 --> 00:47:31,840
        and all it may bring.        

885
00:47:33,640 --> 00:47:36,400
   I open Pandora's box of hope.    

886
00:47:37,880 --> 00:47:40,160
          I envision a time          
        in the distant future        

887
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,920
        when synthetics rule.        

888
00:47:43,600 --> 00:47:44,760
            The downside:            

889
00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:48,520
          Humankind destroy          
       the natural environment.      

890
00:47:49,640 --> 00:47:51,000
             The upside:             

891
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,040
   Burgers will be cruelty-free,    
        veggie rubber buns."         

892
00:47:58,680 --> 00:48:01,800
 ["The Day the World Turned        
 Day-Glo" by X-Ray Spex playing]   

893
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:05,120
     I clambered over              
    Mounds and mounds              

894
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:08,200
        Of polystyrene foam        

895
00:48:08,200 --> 00:48:11,560
      Then fell into               
     A swimming pool               

896
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:13,760
       Filled with fairy snow      

897
00:48:13,760 --> 00:48:15,440
       And watched the world       

898
00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:18,440
             Turn Day-Glo           
         You know, you know         

899
00:48:18,480 --> 00:48:22,720
       The world turned Day-Glo     
              You know              

900
00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:34,400
             I wrenched             
      The nylon curtains back       

901
00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:37,720
      As far as they would go      

902
00:48:37,720 --> 00:48:41,040
    Then peered through            
   Perspex window panes            

903
00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:43,000
        At the acrylic road        

904
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:46,560
        And watched the world       
           Turn Day-Glo             

905
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:48,400
         You know, you know        

906
00:48:48,400 --> 00:48:52,880
       The world turned Day-Glo     
              You know              

907
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:56,000
               Uh-oh               

908
00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:00,120
          [Ana da Silva]            
        I think she was aware        

909
00:49:00,120 --> 00:49:03,040
     of how society was changing     

910
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:04,840
 into a very consumerist society, 

911
00:49:05,960 --> 00:49:09,080
             and probably            
      coming a lot from America.     

912
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:11,760
       She saw into the future.      

913
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:15,960
            [John Robb]             
          She felt the world         
          was a monolithic,          

914
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:17,360
             cruel place,            

915
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:18,560
         and why can't it be         
            a nice place?            

916
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:20,960
            [Paul Dean]             
 All those songs, "Art-I-Ficial", 

917
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:24,440
   "Highly Inflammable",            
   "Genetic Engineering",           

918
00:49:24,440 --> 00:49:27,080
 all these songs were progression 
         from the early stuff,       

919
00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:30,200
   which was about relationships    
         and about herself.          

920
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:33,480
         The consumer society        
 was there in front of her eyes.   

921
00:49:34,640 --> 00:49:37,600
      ["The Day the World           
        Turned Day-Glo" ends]       

922
00:49:42,240 --> 00:49:45,160
            [Celeste]               
     The whole CBGB's experience     

923
00:49:45,160 --> 00:49:47,600
     changed my mum as a person.     

924
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:51,880
           She was exposed           
 to the city's seedy underbelly.   

925
00:49:53,280 --> 00:49:57,000
        And she lost whatever        
   innocence she still had left.    

926
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:03,600
         She told me that she        
     was given something to smoke    

927
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:05,720
     at a party there one night,     

928
00:50:07,120 --> 00:50:09,240
 and it tipped her over the edge. 

929
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:14,120
   Now she'd also lost her mind.    

930
00:50:14,120 --> 00:50:17,360
    [ambient club music playing]    

931
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:20,000
         [Vivien Goldman]           
       There was what you might      
           call a darkness           

932
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:21,400
        to the New York scene        

933
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:24,480
 that was very different           
 from the British scene.           

934
00:50:26,080 --> 00:50:27,960
      It was much more accepting     

935
00:50:28,000 --> 00:50:30,640
          of heavy drug use.         

936
00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:34,800
     Disco candy was everywhere.     

937
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:37,720
 Hip people took coke in America. 

938
00:50:39,040 --> 00:50:42,120
        It just turned people        
            into demons.             

939
00:50:44,560 --> 00:50:47,480
     And Poly was that sensitive,    

940
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:49,280
            that no doubt            

941
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:51,760
            she picked up            
       on that negative energy.      

942
00:50:53,080 --> 00:50:56,280
         [music fades out]          
    [high-pitched tone playing]     

943
00:50:57,360 --> 00:50:58,720
          [Poly Styrene]            
         I went to New York.         

944
00:50:59,360 --> 00:51:01,280
      It really turned my head.      

945
00:51:02,240 --> 00:51:03,640
         All that attention,         

946
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:05,600
           they treat you            
   like you're really different.    

947
00:51:06,600 --> 00:51:09,240
 It got to me.                     
 I was worn out and doing drugs    

948
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:10,800
       and I was smoking a lot.      

949
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:15,240
        People were all around       
 telling me how wonderful I was.   

950
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:19,680
          I didn't start to          
         exactly believe it,         

951
00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:22,240
         but I started to get        
            very insecure.           

952
00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:26,960
      [shouting and cheering]       

953
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:29,120
     -[Poly Styrene] Goodnight.     
          -Give us a kiss.          

954
00:51:32,240 --> 00:51:34,920
      [shouting and cheering]       

955
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:42,040
       [sombre music playing]       

956
00:51:47,080 --> 00:51:49,360
          [Hazel Emmons]            
           She didn't like           
          that environment,          

957
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,120
           she didn't like           
          "Top of the Pops".         

958
00:51:51,120 --> 00:51:53,280
   She didn't like mixing around    
      all those kind of people.      

959
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:56,560
          She felt they were         
           very superficial          

960
00:51:56,560 --> 00:51:59,080
        and very not genuine.        

961
00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:02,560
          [Rina Vergano]            
 I remember her coming off stage   

962
00:52:02,560 --> 00:52:04,600
        and totally collapsing       

963
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:06,440
       and crying her eyes out,      

964
00:52:06,480 --> 00:52:08,360
 as if she totally forced herself 

965
00:52:08,400 --> 00:52:09,920
           to go on stage            
         in the first place.         

966
00:52:10,600 --> 00:52:12,600
 And I could see she wasn't well, 

967
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:14,200
           she wasn't okay.          

968
00:52:16,240 --> 00:52:18,280
          [Poly Styrene]            
               I mean,               
      it isn't normal for people     

969
00:52:18,280 --> 00:52:22,680
 to be surrounded with people...   
 telling them that they're great. 

970
00:52:22,680 --> 00:52:25,680
 That isn't a normal situation,    
 most people do not get that.      

971
00:52:25,720 --> 00:52:28,080
       It isn't normal to be...      

972
00:52:28,120 --> 00:52:31,720
        up on stage and people       
         jumping all over you        
     and ripping your clothes off,   

973
00:52:31,720 --> 00:52:34,040
      that isn't a normal thing      
        for anybody to take.         

974
00:52:35,440 --> 00:52:38,000
       And then you get people       
      coming backstage as well,      

975
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:39,680
           you get people            
        coming to your house,        

976
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:41,960
       and then you get people       
         trying to break in,         

977
00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:44,800
   and then you just get people     
   surrounding you all the time.    

978
00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:46,760
             And you just            
        are never on your own,       

979
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:49,240
     and that's just not normal.     

980
00:52:49,240 --> 00:52:51,680
      So therefore, you just say,    
               "Go away,             
     I don't want to see anybody."   

981
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:54,680
      [Poly playing the piano]      

982
00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:00,080
       [sombre tone playing]        

983
00:53:00,080 --> 00:53:01,720
         [Vivien Goldman]           
         The thing with Poly         

984
00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:03,240
           is that she was           

985
00:53:03,240 --> 00:53:05,480
 at the same time very resilient   

986
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:07,600
       and yet very vulnerable.      

987
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:12,400
       Especially being so much      
           in the vanguard,          

988
00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:17,400
    her immediate support system    
    of people who really got her    

989
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:20,280
         was not that large.         

990
00:53:22,400 --> 00:53:24,800
          [interviewer 1]           
        We read every week          
     in the music trade papers      

991
00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:26,520
       the exploits of, say,        

992
00:53:26,520 --> 00:53:28,200
          The Sex Pistols           
         and Johnny Rotten.         

993
00:53:28,240 --> 00:53:31,360
         Are you a follower         
    of The Sex Pistols yourself?    

994
00:53:31,400 --> 00:53:33,360
 I mean, I like The Sex Pistols.   

995
00:53:33,400 --> 00:53:34,800
         Yeah, I like them.         

996
00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:38,440
 'Cos they're sort of              
 part of our generation, really.   

997
00:53:46,280 --> 00:53:48,800
          [Adrian Bell]             
             John Lydon,             
     who she really liked a lot,     

998
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,320
 and obviously got a lot           
 of her inspiration from,          

999
00:53:52,360 --> 00:53:53,800
     was living 'round the corner    

1000
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:55,640
   at Gunter Grove at this point.   

1001
00:53:56,720 --> 00:53:59,520
         We used to see him,         
       sometimes, riding along,      

1002
00:53:59,520 --> 00:54:01,320
       we'd stop and say hello.      

1003
00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:05,600
          [Rina Vergano]            
     She was kind of infatuated,     

1004
00:54:05,600 --> 00:54:10,120
       or at least had a crush       
     of some sort on John Lydon.     

1005
00:54:11,240 --> 00:54:14,360
 But she felt                      
 not taken seriously by him        

1006
00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:15,560
        and the rest of them.        

1007
00:54:15,600 --> 00:54:17,240
          [door slamming]           

1008
00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:20,440
       Apparently, Sid Vicious       
     had locked her in a cupboard    

1009
00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:21,400
          under the stairs.          

1010
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:23,800
     She asked where the loo was     

1011
00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:25,680
 and he tricked her                
 into going into this cupboard,    

1012
00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:27,360
           slammed the door          
          and locked her in          
          for about an hour.         

1013
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,920
 Yeah, she was really,             
 really upset by that.             

1014
00:54:32,320 --> 00:54:34,680
         [Vivien Goldman]           
           They were lads,           
         they were laddiest,         

1015
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:38,400
       unthinking, mean things.      

1016
00:54:38,400 --> 00:54:40,080
         Undercutting things,        

1017
00:54:40,080 --> 00:54:43,280
 things designed                   
 to make you feel like nothing.    

1018
00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:45,200
      Like, worse than nothing.      

1019
00:54:45,240 --> 00:54:47,280
              As if they             
        had no regard for you.       

1020
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:53,920
     That was the sort of milieu     
       that Poly encountered,        

1021
00:54:54,480 --> 00:54:56,320
         that encouraged her         

1022
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:59,320
        to go into the toilet        
          at John's house.           

1023
00:55:02,240 --> 00:55:04,040
            [Don Letts]             
             I was 'round            
       at Johnny Rotten's place      

1024
00:55:04,080 --> 00:55:06,240
 and Poly turned up at the door.   

1025
00:55:06,240 --> 00:55:08,680
       Which was a brave thing,      
             'cos you go             
       around to John's place,       

1026
00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:10,720
      it's like baptism by fire.     

1027
00:55:11,880 --> 00:55:13,760
             I remember              
        she was sitting there        

1028
00:55:13,760 --> 00:55:15,360
     and not really saying much.     

1029
00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:18,600
 And we were shooting the breeze   
        and being typical lads       

1030
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:19,880
      and sort of ignoring her.      

1031
00:55:21,160 --> 00:55:22,760
          And at some point          
       during the conversation,      

1032
00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:24,400
          during the night,          

1033
00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:25,800
            she'd got up             
     and went into the bathroom.     

1034
00:55:25,840 --> 00:55:27,840
          [door clacking]           

1035
00:55:27,880 --> 00:55:30,800
             And no one              
       thought anything of it.       

1036
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:39,320
      [ambient music playing]       

1037
00:55:43,440 --> 00:55:46,800
         And then I guess we         
       were talking for a while      

1038
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:48,440
 and not realized she'd been gone 

1039
00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:50,080
       for like, half an hour.       

1040
00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:53,680
          And then we heard          
        the bathroom door open       

1041
00:55:53,680 --> 00:55:55,200
          and we looked up,          

1042
00:55:55,240 --> 00:55:56,320
         and she started to          
       walk down the stairs...       

1043
00:55:57,400 --> 00:56:03,040
       [footsteps on stairs,        
         stairs creaking]           

1044
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:07,000
 And she'd cut all her hair off.   

1045
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:10,600
     [ambient music continues]      

1046
00:56:17,480 --> 00:56:20,840
      I'll be honest with you,       
     we were totally insensitive     
           to the moment.            

1047
00:56:27,560 --> 00:56:30,400
     [ambient music fades out]      

1048
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:33,960
          [Adrian Bell]             
        The thing is, she had        
     a gig coming up.   [chuckles]     

1049
00:56:34,000 --> 00:56:35,840
           What do you do?           
      She'd got a gig coming up,     

1050
00:56:35,880 --> 00:56:38,400
   at Victoria Park, massive gig.   

1051
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:40,480
          [crowd chanting]          

1052
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:43,400
          [crowd chanting]          
         The National Front         
          is a Nazi front!          

1053
00:56:46,440 --> 00:56:48,800
           [Paul Dean]              
              We played              
       at Rock Against Racism,       

1054
00:56:48,800 --> 00:56:50,880
   along with Tom Robinson Band,    

1055
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:53,120
         The Clash, Sham 69.         

1056
00:56:54,440 --> 00:56:56,040
 There were 80,000 people there.   

1057
00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:59,440
     That was a really huge gig.     

1058
00:57:01,240 --> 00:57:03,840
         [Vivien Goldman]           
          If you were ever           
       at one of those events,       

1059
00:57:03,840 --> 00:57:06,680
         like the big events         
          in Victoria Park,          

1060
00:57:06,680 --> 00:57:08,560
        it made one feel that        

1061
00:57:08,560 --> 00:57:10,760
 one was part of a positive army   

1062
00:57:10,760 --> 00:57:13,160
   of like-minded people.           
   You felt so empowered.           

1063
00:57:14,280 --> 00:57:16,520
           You really felt           
         that this generation        

1064
00:57:16,560 --> 00:57:22,000
         had made racism and         
     fascism laughable and passé.    

1065
00:57:24,560 --> 00:57:26,240
            [Paul Dean]             
         When we were driving        
            to the venue,            

1066
00:57:26,280 --> 00:57:28,360
         and Poly was wearing        
           a woollen scarf           

1067
00:57:28,360 --> 00:57:30,240
       wrapped around her head,      
            and she said,            

1068
00:57:30,240 --> 00:57:31,840
            "Oh, I shaved            
         my head last night."        

1069
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:33,480
           And Falcon said,          

1070
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:35,440
        "Well, you bloody well       
      do not take that scarf off     

1071
00:57:35,440 --> 00:57:36,520
      while you're performing."      

1072
00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:39,680
 And she winked                    
 and said, "Oh no, I won't."       

1073
00:57:39,680 --> 00:57:41,800
          [crowd cheering]          

1074
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:43,400
           Halfway through           
         the song "Identity",        

1075
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:48,160
 she was going "Identity..."       
 and she started to unravel it.    

1076
00:57:49,080 --> 00:57:50,640
          [Adrian Bell]             
       She did it in a kind of       

1077
00:57:50,640 --> 00:57:52,480
      seductive, teasing manner.     

1078
00:57:52,480 --> 00:57:55,360
   She started hovering her hand    
     around the top of her head      

1079
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:57,160
             and taking              
      bits of it off like that.      

1080
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:01,720
 By the time she got to the end    
 there was gasps at the front      

1081
00:58:01,720 --> 00:58:04,080
           of the audience,          
         going "Oh my God..."        

1082
00:58:04,080 --> 00:58:06,600
             "Skinhead!"             
             [chuckles]             

1083
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:10,440
            ["Identity"             
       live version playing]        

1084
00:58:15,160 --> 00:58:16,800
 [Paul Dean]                       
 Falcon was going mad about it.    

1085
00:58:16,800 --> 00:58:18,240
   We all laughed our heads off.    

1086
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:21,560
         She said she didn't         
       want to be a sex symbol.      

1087
00:58:21,600 --> 00:58:24,480
           And she'd said            
         if she ever thought         
      she was turning into one,      

1088
00:58:24,480 --> 00:58:25,640
      she'd shave her hair off.      

1089
00:58:25,680 --> 00:58:27,080
       And that's what she did.      

1090
00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:33,640
            [song ends,             
       cheering and applause]       

1091
00:58:35,360 --> 00:58:37,000
             [Celeste]              
      She wasn't the first woman     

1092
00:58:37,000 --> 00:58:39,480
          to shave her head          
        in an act of defiance,       

1093
00:58:40,680 --> 00:58:43,520
        and she certainly            
        wouldn't be the last.        

1094
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:45,640
      [ambient music playing]       

1095
00:58:46,720 --> 00:58:48,720
     It was a powerful statement,    

1096
00:58:49,600 --> 00:58:52,000
 but it was also a cry for help.   

1097
00:58:53,720 --> 00:58:56,040
      She really needed a break.     

1098
00:58:57,000 --> 00:58:58,840
          There was so much          
           pressure on her           

1099
00:58:58,840 --> 00:59:00,480
          to keep doing it.          

1100
00:59:01,800 --> 00:59:04,040
        Something had to give.       

1101
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:09,080
          [crowd cheering]          

1102
00:59:10,800 --> 00:59:14,040
          [Poly Styrene]            
             The moment              
       that changed me forever       

1103
00:59:14,920 --> 00:59:17,120
       was seeing a Day-Glo UFO      

1104
00:59:17,160 --> 00:59:20,040
        in Doncaster one night       
           after a concert.          

1105
00:59:22,000 --> 00:59:24,560
         It was a bright ball        
          of luminous pink,          

1106
00:59:24,600 --> 00:59:26,680
 made of energy, like a fireball. 

1107
00:59:29,040 --> 00:59:31,240
        Everyone else thought        
         I'd lost the plot.          

1108
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:37,480
          [Adrian Bell]             
         It was the last leg         
           of their tour.            

1109
00:59:38,760 --> 00:59:41,360
             She'd gone up           
 to her hotel room after the gig. 

1110
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:42,600
   And she said all of a sudden,    

1111
00:59:43,760 --> 00:59:46,880
      she saw this bright light      
             in the sky,             

1112
00:59:46,880 --> 00:59:48,600
      in the night sky, that...      

1113
00:59:49,640 --> 00:59:50,720
     didn't appear to be a star.     

1114
00:59:51,560 --> 00:59:52,760
       It seemed to be moving,       

1115
00:59:52,760 --> 00:59:53,480
      getting bigger and bigger,     

1116
00:59:54,720 --> 00:59:56,240
           and what's more,          
      it was coming towards her.     

1117
00:59:57,400 --> 00:59:59,360
            And it zoomed            
        right up to the window       

1118
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:00,600
     and seemed to be               
     probing the room,              

1119
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:04,800
        hovering there,              
          taking it all in,          

1120
01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:06,800
         and she's sat there,        
            like, frozen.            

1121
01:00:06,840 --> 01:00:09,640
     [ambient music continues]      

1122
01:00:11,200 --> 01:00:13,440
            [Paul Dean]             
     She'd said at breakfast time    
            the next day,            

1123
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:15,240
              "Oh, I saw             
       a flying saucer outside.      

1124
01:00:15,240 --> 01:00:16,960
       It's told me to give up       

1125
01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:18,520
            the electric             
      and plastic way of life."      

1126
01:00:19,200 --> 01:00:20,520
       "Go for a simple life."       

1127
01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:23,560
               We said,              
       "What are you on about?"      

1128
01:00:25,000 --> 01:00:26,680
 Took no notice,                   
 got in the car.                   

1129
01:00:26,680 --> 01:00:29,440
     And in the car, she started     
       taking her clothes off,       

1130
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:31,080
               saying,               
         "I want to go back,         

1131
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:33,560
        I want to be Marianne,       
         I want to go back."         

1132
01:00:38,640 --> 01:00:40,840
          [Hazel Emmons]            
           She was a very,           
        very sensitive person.       

1133
01:00:41,920 --> 01:00:44,680
               And she               
      was almost like a sponge.      

1134
01:00:46,080 --> 01:00:48,640
           She would absorb          

1135
01:00:48,680 --> 01:00:50,880
            lots of things           
     which were going around her,    

1136
01:00:51,680 --> 01:00:53,480
       for better or for worse.      

1137
01:00:56,320 --> 01:00:59,160
        When you put somebody        
     which is so hyper-sensitive     

1138
01:00:59,160 --> 01:01:01,560
 and so open and so intelligent,   

1139
01:01:01,560 --> 01:01:03,680
        and then you put them        
         in this environment         

1140
01:01:03,720 --> 01:01:07,200
             where there's           
 all this different mix of people 

1141
01:01:07,200 --> 01:01:09,520
      wanting different things,      

1142
01:01:09,520 --> 01:01:12,320
 'cos, you know,                   
 she was a commodity as well...    

1143
01:01:14,600 --> 01:01:17,640
     it wasn't a conducive place     
            for her to be            

1144
01:01:17,680 --> 01:01:19,080
           for who she was.          

1145
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:22,320
     [ambient music continues]      

1146
01:01:24,080 --> 01:01:26,240
             [Yashoda]              
      I mean, she was telling me     
      when she was even younger,     

1147
01:01:26,280 --> 01:01:28,720
            when she was             
        like three years old,        

1148
01:01:28,720 --> 01:01:31,640
     she thought that, you know,     
        she'd met some people        
          from outer space.          

1149
01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:35,280
      She was such a high being.     

1150
01:01:35,280 --> 01:01:37,480
   A very high, spiritual being,    

1151
01:01:38,160 --> 01:01:40,520
            even when she            
        went off the rockers.        

1152
01:01:43,040 --> 01:01:45,160
           [Adrian Bell]            
          I mean, I remember         
     when we were walking through    

1153
01:01:45,160 --> 01:01:47,400
          Kensington Gardens         
            one afternoon.           

1154
01:01:47,840 --> 01:01:50,160
         She saw these crows.        

1155
01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:52,440
              You know,              
       she says that they're...      

1156
01:01:53,440 --> 01:01:54,840
     Like the Vikings used to say    

1157
01:01:54,840 --> 01:01:56,200
     they were the eyes of Odin,     

1158
01:01:56,720 --> 01:01:58,120
            and all that.            

1159
01:01:58,120 --> 01:01:59,880
   She said, "Watch them,           
   they're watching us."            

1160
01:02:04,840 --> 01:02:08,240
            [Celeste]               
        People started saying        
        she'd lost the plot,         

1161
01:02:08,840 --> 01:02:10,400
        that she'd gone mad.         

1162
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:14,200
 But she didn't see it that way.   

1163
01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:16,640
     [soft piano music playing]     

1164
01:02:16,640 --> 01:02:19,080
            She felt that            
        she was going through        

1165
01:02:19,080 --> 01:02:22,240
              some kind              
       of spiritual awakening.       

1166
01:02:22,760 --> 01:02:24,680
      That she could see things      

1167
01:02:24,680 --> 01:02:27,840
             that others             
        were too blind to see.       

1168
01:02:34,840 --> 01:02:37,360
          [Poly Styrene]            
          My mother thought          
         I was hallucinating,        

1169
01:02:37,360 --> 01:02:39,720
   and I was put in the Maudsley.   

1170
01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:43,200
        'Cos if you see things       
           and hear voices,          

1171
01:02:43,200 --> 01:02:45,360
          you are considered         
        to have schizophrenia.       

1172
01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:49,520
      [piano music continues]       

1173
01:02:52,080 --> 01:02:55,560
 [Celeste]                         
 The first time she saw herself    
 singing on the telly,             

1174
01:02:56,480 --> 01:02:58,840
   she was on a psychiatric ward.   

1175
01:03:01,080 --> 01:03:03,280
          Men in white coats         
           carted her away           

1176
01:03:03,320 --> 01:03:05,200
          after an episode.          

1177
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:09,600
     There were lots of episodes.    

1178
01:03:10,280 --> 01:03:12,400
      One worse than the other.      

1179
01:03:15,240 --> 01:03:18,680
         She was misdiagnosed        
          with schizophrenia         

1180
01:03:20,120 --> 01:03:25,240
 when in fact she was suffering    
 from acute bipolar disorder.      

1181
01:03:28,200 --> 01:03:31,880
      [piano music continues]       

1182
01:03:33,080 --> 01:03:36,560
          [Poly Styrene]            
       It felt like a bad omen.      

1183
01:03:37,720 --> 01:03:40,280
              Like I was             
        doing something wrong.       

1184
01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:42,880
          Misguiding people.         

1185
01:03:45,840 --> 01:03:47,280
      I was dealing with a lot,      

1186
01:03:47,280 --> 01:03:49,040
         and then to be given        
          a label like that,         

1187
01:03:50,080 --> 01:03:52,400
        only to find out later       
            that I wasn't,           

1188
01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:55,560
 and that they had got it wrong,   
        was really difficult.        

1189
01:03:58,760 --> 01:04:00,360
           They said to me,          

1190
01:04:01,640 --> 01:04:03,640
         "You're a young girl        
     who has got out of her depth    

1191
01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:06,600
         and you will never          
       be able to work again."       

1192
01:04:06,640 --> 01:04:07,840
              [scoffs]              

1193
01:04:09,040 --> 01:04:12,320
      That is a very hard thing      
          to be told at 21.          

1194
01:04:17,720 --> 01:04:19,400
            [Paul Dean]             
       I'm sorry I didn't treat      
            her very good.           

1195
01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:21,720
           I wasn't really           
       sympathetic at the time.      

1196
01:04:22,800 --> 01:04:25,880
           I was worried,            
     but mainly for my own self.     

1197
01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:28,000
               Selfish.              

1198
01:04:29,200 --> 01:04:32,560
       [sombre music playing]       

1199
01:04:35,680 --> 01:04:37,480
             [Celeste]              
            The only thing           
          that really worked         

1200
01:04:37,480 --> 01:04:40,680
     were the drugs they gave her    
       when she was sectioned.       

1201
01:04:42,520 --> 01:04:45,000
       They would pin her down       
           and inject her            

1202
01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:46,320
         with tranquillisers         

1203
01:04:46,320 --> 01:04:48,080
            strong enough            
        to knock a horse out.        

1204
01:04:50,800 --> 01:04:54,320
            I saw my mum             
      being sedated many times.      

1205
01:04:55,800 --> 01:04:58,000
           I must have been          
         about four years old        

1206
01:04:58,000 --> 01:05:00,640
           when I realised           
       something wasn't right.       

1207
01:05:03,040 --> 01:05:07,480
   Suddenly I was able to detect    
      the changes in her mood,       

1208
01:05:08,560 --> 01:05:12,320
         the constant cycle          
       of elation and despair.       

1209
01:05:16,040 --> 01:05:17,720
   I'll never forget those nights   

1210
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:21,960
          when the sensation         
     that someone was watching me    

1211
01:05:22,000 --> 01:05:26,000
            was so strong            
     that I'd wake up in a panic,    

1212
01:05:27,360 --> 01:05:30,600
   only to see her shadow           
   at the foot of my bed.           

1213
01:05:32,840 --> 01:05:35,200
             She'd stand             
       in the corner of my room      

1214
01:05:35,200 --> 01:05:37,400
      watching me as I slept...      

1215
01:05:39,280 --> 01:05:41,680
       her eyes wide with fear.      

1216
01:05:44,040 --> 01:05:45,920
          I was scared too,          

1217
01:05:47,080 --> 01:05:48,880
            scared of her.           

1218
01:05:56,200 --> 01:05:58,760
      ["Germ Free Adolescents"      
              playing]              

1219
01:06:06,040 --> 01:06:09,080
       I know your antiseptic      

1220
01:06:09,080 --> 01:06:13,000
    Your deodorant smells nice    

1221
01:06:13,000 --> 01:06:15,200
             [Celeste]              
         The show must go on,        
              they said.             

1222
01:06:16,240 --> 01:06:18,080
 So, she tried to                  
     keep it together.              

1223
01:06:19,040 --> 01:06:21,520
   Keep singing, keep performing.   

1224
01:06:22,800 --> 01:06:24,880
            The medication           
         helped for a period,        

1225
01:06:26,000 --> 01:06:28,080
         but she was starting        
             to push back            

1226
01:06:28,080 --> 01:06:29,440
        against the pressure.        

1227
01:06:29,480 --> 01:06:32,400
        to keep up the façade        
          of Poly Styrene.           

1228
01:06:32,400 --> 01:06:35,600
     [suspenseful tone playing]     

1229
01:06:37,000 --> 01:06:39,600
          [Poly Styrene]            
         I'm like an actress         
        that's something else.       

1230
01:06:39,600 --> 01:06:41,240
        On stage I'm one thing       

1231
01:06:41,240 --> 01:06:43,000
            and off stage            
         I'm something else.         

1232
01:06:44,000 --> 01:06:45,800
       But most people are not.      

1233
01:06:47,800 --> 01:06:50,240
        I just consider myself       
          as a person first,         

1234
01:06:50,280 --> 01:06:51,840
          and anything else,         

1235
01:06:51,840 --> 01:06:53,880
          what anybody else          
        might call you, well,        

1236
01:06:55,080 --> 01:06:56,760
 they're just names,               
    really, aren't they?            

1237
01:06:56,800 --> 01:07:00,320
 Just given to trends and people   

1238
01:07:00,320 --> 01:07:01,680
        and things like that.        

1239
01:07:02,800 --> 01:07:06,960
           [suspenseful,            
      distorted music playing]      

1240
01:07:18,400 --> 01:07:23,480
        [soft music playing]        

1241
01:07:23,480 --> 01:07:24,840
            [John Robb]             
 I think a lot of people thought, 

1242
01:07:24,840 --> 01:07:26,840
   "Oh, Poly Styrene's gone mad."   

1243
01:07:28,360 --> 01:07:29,800
      She had a brilliant band,      

1244
01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:31,200
 she had all the success,          

1245
01:07:32,360 --> 01:07:34,840
            and suddenly             
      just walked away from it.      

1246
01:07:40,600 --> 01:07:42,960
            [Celeste]               
        It took an incredible        
         amount of strength          

1247
01:07:43,000 --> 01:07:46,000
       for my mum to walk away       
          from X-Ray Spex,           

1248
01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:50,200
         the band she herself        
          had put together,          

1249
01:07:51,280 --> 01:07:53,520
 the band that was doing so well. 

1250
01:07:54,600 --> 01:07:57,160
       They were at the height       
          of their success.          

1251
01:07:59,480 --> 01:08:01,520
     I think she understood that     

1252
01:08:01,520 --> 01:08:04,440
        the only way she could       
          continue to exist          

1253
01:08:04,480 --> 01:08:06,280
       as an authentic person,       

1254
01:08:07,360 --> 01:08:10,040
              as someone             
       who was true to herself,      

1255
01:08:10,800 --> 01:08:14,040
       was to kill the persona       
           she'd created.            

1256
01:08:16,240 --> 01:08:18,600
       Poly Styrene had to die       

1257
01:08:18,600 --> 01:08:21,600
         so Marianne Elliott         
           could survive.            

1258
01:08:27,360 --> 01:08:30,240
          [waves crashing]          

1259
01:08:33,200 --> 01:08:36,800
       [wind shaking leaves]        

1260
01:08:41,400 --> 01:08:43,120
          [Poly Styrene]            
         "Read   Time   magazine         

1261
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:45,720
      over continental breakfast     
       in the south of France.       

1262
01:08:47,000 --> 01:08:50,280
   Genetic possibilities            
   filled glossy pages.             

1263
01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:56,280
    On a golden stretch             
    of sand in Cannes,              

1264
01:08:56,280 --> 01:08:57,760
      I worshipped the sun god,      

1265
01:08:58,720 --> 01:09:01,880
         in a sunshine yellow        
          towelling bikini."         

1266
01:09:04,840 --> 01:09:06,440
          [Adrian Bell]             
          When I'd met her,          

1267
01:09:06,480 --> 01:09:08,400
              she'd been             
       in a convalescence place      

1268
01:09:08,400 --> 01:09:10,800
       to get over the traumas.      

1269
01:09:13,080 --> 01:09:15,760
     I was staying in a flat,       
     just off the King's Road,      

1270
01:09:17,280 --> 01:09:20,760
   and one night, we walked past    
 this quite flashy designer shop. 

1271
01:09:21,960 --> 01:09:24,120
         And she was outside,        
        looking in the window.       

1272
01:09:25,400 --> 01:09:30,440
          She was dressed in         
 a sort of '50s-type flared skirt 

1273
01:09:30,480 --> 01:09:33,200
          and hair sort of           
        straightened and long        

1274
01:09:33,200 --> 01:09:34,320
         and white stilettos.        

1275
01:09:36,240 --> 01:09:38,640
          Anyway, I thought,         
        "I can't let this go."       

1276
01:09:38,640 --> 01:09:40,600
            So as we were            
        walking past, I said,        

1277
01:09:40,640 --> 01:09:42,280
          "Ah, you're Poly,"         

1278
01:09:42,280 --> 01:09:44,200
       and invited her to come       
      and have a drink with us.      

1279
01:09:45,320 --> 01:09:50,200
          ["Sub Tropical"           
      by Poly Styrene playing]      

1280
01:09:53,280 --> 01:09:58,400
              All alone             
        In a tropical garden        

1281
01:10:01,240 --> 01:10:07,160
           Parakeet trills          
           Slowly harden            

1282
01:10:09,640 --> 01:10:11,720
             [Celeste]              
     It was all rather whirlwind.    

1283
01:10:12,640 --> 01:10:15,240
              They were              
       inseparable for a time.       

1284
01:10:16,400 --> 01:10:19,280
 They didn't even tell anyone      
 when they got married             

1285
01:10:19,320 --> 01:10:22,840
 at the Chelsea Registry Office    
 on the King's Road.               

1286
01:10:24,240 --> 01:10:26,280
          [Adrian Bell]             
      Oh, yeah, we got married.      
            [chuckles]              

1287
01:10:26,320 --> 01:10:28,120
 We got married in the September, 

1288
01:10:28,560 --> 01:10:30,040
         we only met in June.        

1289
01:10:31,680 --> 01:10:34,600
           After, I dunno,           
     three months of meeting Poly    

1290
01:10:34,600 --> 01:10:36,200
          she was pregnant.          

1291
01:10:37,480 --> 01:10:40,400
             [Celeste]              
         Mum was 24 years old        
           when I was born.          

1292
01:10:41,840 --> 01:10:45,760
      She told me that having me     
 was the best thing she ever did. 

1293
01:10:46,480 --> 01:10:48,920
 But motherhood was a challenge.   

1294
01:10:50,320 --> 01:10:52,080
           [baby cooing]            

1295
01:10:52,080 --> 01:10:54,440
              Her mental             
       health was still fragile      

1296
01:10:54,480 --> 01:10:57,880
         and there were times        
 when she couldn't look after me. 

1297
01:10:59,840 --> 01:11:03,960
      It was hard for my father,     
           he was so young.          

1298
01:11:04,760 --> 01:11:06,880
   They were both kids, really.     

1299
01:11:08,520 --> 01:11:11,560
           [Adrian Bell]            
           I knew that Poly          
          had been admitted,         

1300
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:13,360
              you know,              
       sectioned and all that.       

1301
01:11:14,280 --> 01:11:15,760
      I still loved her, though.     

1302
01:11:17,040 --> 01:11:18,680
         I'm obviously gonna         
     stick it out no matter what.    

1303
01:11:20,680 --> 01:11:26,040
          ["Translucence"           
      by Poly Styrene playing]      

1304
01:11:26,440 --> 01:11:27,880
          Just as I met her,         

1305
01:11:27,920 --> 01:11:30,280
      her album was coming out,      
            Translucence.            

1306
01:11:30,640 --> 01:11:32,080
           The solo album.           

1307
01:11:33,440 --> 01:11:35,440
     If you listen to the lyrics,    
       it's totally different.       

1308
01:11:36,720 --> 01:11:39,720
       How you make such a jump      
         from that power pop         

1309
01:11:39,720 --> 01:11:43,440
       to something almost akin      
         to Joan Armatrading?        

1310
01:11:43,480 --> 01:11:46,400
     ["Translucent" continues]      

1311
01:11:50,680 --> 01:11:52,040
           [G.T. Moore]             
      It seemed like she'd been      

1312
01:11:52,080 --> 01:11:53,720
     through some kind of trauma.    

1313
01:11:54,720 --> 01:11:59,080
   And music was her way            
   of dealing with that.            

1314
01:12:03,480 --> 01:12:07,760
 For people that have had          
 bad times in life in some way,    

1315
01:12:07,760 --> 01:12:10,800
       music can be a way of,        
      like, healing themselves.      

1316
01:12:10,800 --> 01:12:13,480
     She was after that             
     in her own music.              

1317
01:12:15,480 --> 01:12:17,680
          [Adrian Bell]             
           So, I was there           
       for all the interviews,       

1318
01:12:17,680 --> 01:12:19,800
            and, you know,           
      journalists coming 'round.     

1319
01:12:19,800 --> 01:12:21,520
          But their reviews          
         were really damning.        

1320
01:12:23,080 --> 01:12:27,040
          Like totally. Like,        
 "What is this bollocks?" almost. 

1321
01:12:28,320 --> 01:12:30,800
            EMI, dismayed            

1322
01:12:30,800 --> 01:12:33,960
           at the negative           
       response from the press,      

1323
01:12:34,000 --> 01:12:35,680
          said "That's it."          

1324
01:12:35,720 --> 01:12:37,680
   They obviously had the option    
           on their side.            

1325
01:12:37,680 --> 01:12:39,480
          [phone ringing]           

1326
01:12:43,400 --> 01:12:46,120
         [music fades out]          

1327
01:12:52,680 --> 01:12:54,440
           Now it just went          
          from bad to worse,         

1328
01:12:54,440 --> 01:12:55,880
        to be honest with you.       

1329
01:12:56,840 --> 01:12:57,840
          I was on the dole.         

1330
01:12:59,240 --> 01:13:01,840
     There was mass unemployment     
         back then, really.          

1331
01:13:02,840 --> 01:13:04,360
       We ended up at my mum's       

1332
01:13:04,960 --> 01:13:06,600
        and then her mum's,          

1333
01:13:09,200 --> 01:13:11,600
              and then,              
       she'd had enough of it.       

1334
01:13:13,000 --> 01:13:14,480
        She went off to India.       

1335
01:13:15,680 --> 01:13:18,360
        And Celeste and I,           
        we stayed at my mum's.       

1336
01:13:20,480 --> 01:13:22,000
 I think she really decided then   

1337
01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:25,040
     she was gonna go head-first     
       into the Indian scene.        

1338
01:13:26,040 --> 01:13:28,880
         She started dressing        
          like proper saris          

1339
01:13:28,880 --> 01:13:31,120
 and with a dot on the forehead.   

1340
01:13:32,480 --> 01:13:34,760
   And so she went back to London   

1341
01:13:34,800 --> 01:13:37,280
         and threw her lot in        
        with the Hare Krishna.       

1342
01:13:38,600 --> 01:13:41,080
 And I mean everything,            
 all her furniture, everything.    

1343
01:13:41,800 --> 01:13:43,440
         Moved in with them.         

1344
01:13:45,840 --> 01:13:48,440
            [reporter]              
     This is Bhaktivedanta Manor     
          in Hertfordshire,          

1345
01:13:48,440 --> 01:13:50,360
        European Headquarters        
   of the Hare Krishna movement.    

1346
01:13:51,720 --> 01:13:53,480
            George Harrison          
     bought it for them last year.   

1347
01:13:54,800 --> 01:13:57,360
          Most of their day          
     is spent worshipping Krishna    

1348
01:13:57,360 --> 01:14:00,040
     and learning his philosophy     
      of perfect consciousness.      

1349
01:14:00,040 --> 01:14:02,160
 ["India" by X-Ray Spex playing]   

1350
01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:05,840
            [John Robb]             
      I think it was The Beatles     
         and George Harrison,        

1351
01:14:05,840 --> 01:14:07,440
      that's how we got into it.     

1352
01:14:08,680 --> 01:14:10,280
      She was a hippie, really.      

1353
01:14:11,160 --> 01:14:12,520
     Too sensitive for the world.    

1354
01:14:14,360 --> 01:14:18,000
 She needed something to give her 
      some stability in her life.    

1355
01:14:20,560 --> 01:14:24,040
         [music fades out]          

1356
01:14:25,240 --> 01:14:26,800
            [Celeste]               
         I was a small child         

1357
01:14:26,800 --> 01:14:29,080
            when we went             
        to live in the manor.        

1358
01:14:30,080 --> 01:14:33,200
             I understand            
 why she wanted us to live there, 

1359
01:14:33,800 --> 01:14:35,360
        surrounded by nature,        

1360
01:14:36,600 --> 01:14:38,960
        and full of little           
        Hare Krishna children        

1361
01:14:39,000 --> 01:14:40,480
          I could play with.         

1362
01:14:41,680 --> 01:14:44,120
 She changed her name yet again.   

1363
01:14:44,920 --> 01:14:46,320
       This time it was a name       

1364
01:14:46,320 --> 01:14:49,640
             given to her            
        by her guru, Bhagavan.       

1365
01:14:50,720 --> 01:14:52,920
      Now she went by Maharani.      

1366
01:14:54,080 --> 01:14:58,560
        He gave me a name too,       
            Radha Shakti.            

1367
01:15:00,320 --> 01:15:03,760
     X-Ray Spex saxophone player     
             Lora Logic              

1368
01:15:03,760 --> 01:15:05,440
 joined the Hare Krishna movement 

1369
01:15:05,440 --> 01:15:08,040
       at around the same time       
             as my mum.              

1370
01:15:09,360 --> 01:15:13,560
      They'd fallen out after Mum    
 cruelly sacked her from the band 

1371
01:15:13,560 --> 01:15:15,120
         during the Roxy era,        

1372
01:15:16,400 --> 01:15:20,720
 but they found a common purpose   
      in Krishna consciousness,      

1373
01:15:20,760 --> 01:15:22,680
          which brought them         
            back together.           

1374
01:15:24,560 --> 01:15:26,000
           [Lora Logic]             
            I don't think            
         it was coincidence,         

1375
01:15:26,000 --> 01:15:28,080
   I think it was highly planned    

1376
01:15:28,080 --> 01:15:31,600
       by the universal laws,        
     'cos nothing's an accident.     

1377
01:15:32,520 --> 01:15:35,000
      But I was a bit surprised.     

1378
01:15:36,640 --> 01:15:39,120
          We had to relate           
     on the platform of the fact     

1379
01:15:39,120 --> 01:15:41,360
 that we were equal spirit souls, 

1380
01:15:42,640 --> 01:15:47,080
 and a platform where              
 there's no false ego or pride.    

1381
01:15:48,000 --> 01:15:51,240
     Yeah, she changed,             
     she changed a lot.             

1382
01:15:53,800 --> 01:15:55,640
           [John Robb]              
              I went to              
       the Hare Krishna temple       

1383
01:15:55,640 --> 01:15:57,160
        with her a few times,        
      actually into the temple.      

1384
01:15:58,400 --> 01:16:00,040
   And she was very different       
          in the temple.             

1385
01:16:00,560 --> 01:16:02,640
   She was very hypnotised by it.   

1386
01:16:04,600 --> 01:16:07,200
       The Hare Krishna kind of      
        saved her in a sense,        

1387
01:16:08,200 --> 01:16:10,600
             it gave her             
      another world to exist in.     

1388
01:16:13,840 --> 01:16:15,480
       She's fragile, you know,      

1389
01:16:15,480 --> 01:16:17,400
      and I think they provided      
          a family for her,          

1390
01:16:17,760 --> 01:16:19,240
            and a comfort.           

1391
01:16:20,560 --> 01:16:22,480
     More than punk, than music,     
      more than being creative,      

1392
01:16:22,480 --> 01:16:24,960
         the Hare Krishna was        
     a central pillar of her life,   

1393
01:16:24,960 --> 01:16:26,680
              and it was             
       really important to her.      

1394
01:16:29,360 --> 01:16:32,320
          [birds singing]           

1395
01:16:36,680 --> 01:16:38,440
            [Celeste]               
        As hard as she tried,        

1396
01:16:38,480 --> 01:16:41,680
   my mother couldn't completely    
        escape her past life.        

1397
01:16:44,040 --> 01:16:47,080
         Those past traumas          
       continued to haunt her,       

1398
01:16:48,120 --> 01:16:51,040
 and she would suffer              
 a series of nervous breakdowns    

1399
01:16:51,040 --> 01:16:53,440
   during our time in the temple.   

1400
01:16:57,800 --> 01:17:00,120
           [Lora Logic]             
            She was very             
       mentally unstable then,       

1401
01:17:01,040 --> 01:17:02,680
     and she looked so disturbed.    

1402
01:17:02,680 --> 01:17:04,640
           [bell ringing]           

1403
01:17:05,960 --> 01:17:08,640
 It was probably triggered         
 by so many things: hormones,      

1404
01:17:09,400 --> 01:17:10,840
            giving birth,            

1405
01:17:10,840 --> 01:17:12,200
               and then              
       the whole new experience      

1406
01:17:12,200 --> 01:17:14,120
        of living in a temple.       

1407
01:17:17,600 --> 01:17:20,120
         She used to do some         
     wacky things in the temple.     

1408
01:17:20,760 --> 01:17:22,160
       I mean, she'd be, like,       

1409
01:17:22,160 --> 01:17:23,720
    in the temple room              
    with no clothes on.             

1410
01:17:24,960 --> 01:17:28,640
        She'd be chasing             
        celibate monks around,       

1411
01:17:28,640 --> 01:17:30,200
      who were in their pyjamas.     

1412
01:17:32,200 --> 01:17:33,960
          She went to India,         

1413
01:17:33,960 --> 01:17:38,240
         and she'd have to be        
     put on a plane and flown home   

1414
01:17:38,240 --> 01:17:41,200
 because she completely lost it.   

1415
01:17:43,600 --> 01:17:46,040
 I think a lot of it               
 was just due to lack of sleep.    

1416
01:17:46,080 --> 01:17:47,400
          She didn't sleep.          

1417
01:17:49,600 --> 01:17:52,200
       She didn't know how to        
   look after herself very well.    

1418
01:17:53,440 --> 01:17:55,720
          It's like she was          
       never quite in her body,      

1419
01:17:56,680 --> 01:17:59,160
   she was always somewhere else.   

1420
01:18:00,480 --> 01:18:02,720
           It was probably           
        all too much for her.        

1421
01:18:08,680 --> 01:18:11,200
            [Celeste]               
   Our heaven had become a hell,    

1422
01:18:12,160 --> 01:18:14,520
              and it was             
       about to get much worse.      

1423
01:18:17,640 --> 01:18:20,480
        We moved into a house        
          near the temple,           

1424
01:18:21,160 --> 01:18:22,640
       and my mother eventually      

1425
01:18:22,640 --> 01:18:24,400
             took me out             
      of the children's ashram,      

1426
01:18:25,800 --> 01:18:29,200
          which was a kind of        
     Hare Krishna boarding school.   

1427
01:18:30,840 --> 01:18:32,800
      I was truly isolated now.      

1428
01:18:34,240 --> 01:18:37,200
         She hadn't been able        
     to leave the house for weeks,   

1429
01:18:37,960 --> 01:18:39,480
        and my little stomach        

1430
01:18:39,520 --> 01:18:41,880
            was as empty             
      as the kitchen cupboards.      

1431
01:18:43,800 --> 01:18:47,680
       One day I climbed out of      
          my bedroom window          

1432
01:18:48,760 --> 01:18:51,280
 and left home                     
 with the social workers.          

1433
01:18:53,520 --> 01:18:56,760
 The nosy neighbours               
 were concerned for my welfare.    

1434
01:18:58,800 --> 01:18:59,840
           I had to leave,           

1435
01:19:01,040 --> 01:19:03,440
             for the sake            
       of my own mental health.      

1436
01:19:05,160 --> 01:19:07,360
      I know it broke her heart.     

1437
01:19:08,920 --> 01:19:10,280
        I abandoned my mother        

1438
01:19:10,320 --> 01:19:12,880
            and the world            
       she had created for me.       

1439
01:19:15,600 --> 01:19:18,720
           And it had been           
      a beautiful world, Mataji.     

1440
01:19:23,840 --> 01:19:27,360
          [waves crashing]          

1441
01:19:44,280 --> 01:19:45,800
            [Celeste]               
        I was eight years old        

1442
01:19:45,800 --> 01:19:47,280
    when I went to live             
    with my grandmother,            

1443
01:19:48,240 --> 01:19:51,200
         who was eventually          
        granted custody of me        

1444
01:19:51,200 --> 01:19:53,600
             after a long            
        and bitter court case.       

1445
01:19:56,320 --> 01:19:58,840
            It was clear             
        Mum had neglected me.        

1446
01:20:00,200 --> 01:20:01,680
     I was three and a half stone    

1447
01:20:01,680 --> 01:20:03,760
          when I was removed         
            from her care.           

1448
01:20:05,000 --> 01:20:06,880
      I needed years of therapy.     

1449
01:20:13,200 --> 01:20:15,000
   To say that I was an angry kid   

1450
01:20:15,040 --> 01:20:16,760
     would be an understatement.     

1451
01:20:18,040 --> 01:20:20,920
           I told the court          
     I wanted to live with my nan,   

1452
01:20:22,080 --> 01:20:23,360
        the ultimate betrayal        

1453
01:20:23,360 --> 01:20:25,400
         as far as my mother         
           was concerned.            

1454
01:20:25,400 --> 01:20:28,320
    [sombre piano music playing]    

1455
01:20:32,800 --> 01:20:35,880
             [Celeste]              
           Our relationship          
     was pretty rough for a while,   

1456
01:20:37,120 --> 01:20:41,040
 lots of shouting,                 
 slammed doors and angry tears.    

1457
01:20:44,240 --> 01:20:46,440
            She pushed me            
        down the stairs once,        

1458
01:20:47,240 --> 01:20:49,360
   and I never let her forget it.   

1459
01:20:53,360 --> 01:20:54,720
       She wasn't in her right       
           mind of course,           

1460
01:20:56,280 --> 01:20:59,920
      but I blamed her for ever      
     bringing me into this world.    

1461
01:21:04,920 --> 01:21:07,880
       But time is the greatest      
          healer, they say.          

1462
01:21:09,480 --> 01:21:11,240
          And we eventually          

1463
01:21:11,240 --> 01:21:13,400
 found it in our hearts            
 to forgive one another.           

1464
01:21:17,000 --> 01:21:20,560
        She moved to Hastings        
         in the early 2000s          

1465
01:21:21,320 --> 01:21:23,480
        and I moved to Madrid,       

1466
01:21:25,040 --> 01:21:26,720
             but despite,            

1467
01:21:26,720 --> 01:21:30,320
     or maybe thanks to being       
     thousands of miles apart,      

1468
01:21:31,040 --> 01:21:32,920
      we were closer than ever.      

1469
01:21:36,240 --> 01:21:38,080
      The slow pace of the town      

1470
01:21:38,120 --> 01:21:40,040
        and the calming effect       
              of the sea             

1471
01:21:41,120 --> 01:21:43,240
           restored a kind           
          of mental balance          

1472
01:21:43,240 --> 01:21:45,640
          my mother had lost         
         all those years ago.        

1473
01:21:49,040 --> 01:21:51,840
 She was refreshed and energised, 

1474
01:21:52,520 --> 01:21:55,680
           ready to start            
         creating once more.         

1475
01:21:58,520 --> 01:22:01,480
          She was even ready         
           to get on stage,          

1476
01:22:02,920 --> 01:22:06,000
   something she had sworn          
      she would never do again.      

1477
01:22:09,320 --> 01:22:13,040
        [faint crowd noise]         

1478
01:22:13,040 --> 01:22:16,880
      [electric guitar riffs]       

1479
01:22:21,080 --> 01:22:24,360
          [crowd cheering]          

1480
01:22:28,080 --> 01:22:31,080
    [live music starts playing]     

1481
01:22:46,280 --> 01:22:49,280
    [crowd cheering gets louder]    

1482
01:22:49,280 --> 01:22:52,120
          ["Crystal Clear"          
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

1483
01:22:56,120 --> 01:23:00,080
        How do you feel now?       

1484
01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:02,800
           I want to know          

1485
01:23:03,520 --> 01:23:06,120
         Clear as a crystal        

1486
01:23:06,120 --> 01:23:10,000
        I can see your face        

1487
01:23:11,360 --> 01:23:13,080
            [Don Letts]             
 I think it was Poly's last gig,   

1488
01:23:13,080 --> 01:23:14,440
   which none of us were to know.   

1489
01:23:14,440 --> 01:23:16,600
           But I remember            
        she was on fine form,        

1490
01:23:16,600 --> 01:23:19,240
      and you gotta understand,      
          I hadn't seen her          
        since the Roxy days.         

1491
01:23:19,280 --> 01:23:21,040
              And she'd              
      been through a whole load      

1492
01:23:21,080 --> 01:23:22,560
     of trials and tribulations.     

1493
01:23:22,600 --> 01:23:24,920
           And to see her            
      come through all of that,      

1494
01:23:26,040 --> 01:23:28,080
            it looked like           
        the sky was the limit,       

1495
01:23:28,080 --> 01:23:29,480
          and that there was         

1496
01:23:29,520 --> 01:23:31,640
          a whole new lease          
       of life in front of her.      

1497
01:23:35,480 --> 01:23:37,040
            [Paul Dean]             
     Up until a few hours before,    

1498
01:23:37,080 --> 01:23:38,720
 I never really was sure           
 if she was gonna do it.           

1499
01:23:40,200 --> 01:23:43,640
 It was very, very difficult       
 for her to get the confidence.    

1500
01:23:46,600 --> 01:23:49,240
            [Celeste]               
         Mum had been taking         
        medication on and off        

1501
01:23:49,280 --> 01:23:50,760
       for her bipolar disorder      

1502
01:23:51,640 --> 01:23:53,440
      since her first breakdown.     

1503
01:23:55,000 --> 01:23:56,640
         I'd always felt that        

1504
01:23:56,680 --> 01:23:58,520
       she didn't take her meds      
     as often as she should have,    

1505
01:23:59,640 --> 01:24:03,040
     and it was a real source       
     of contention between us.      

1506
01:24:04,480 --> 01:24:06,200
       She felt the medication       

1507
01:24:06,200 --> 01:24:09,800
       had a dampening effect        
     on her creative expression.     

1508
01:24:11,320 --> 01:24:13,120
           But she realised          

1509
01:24:13,160 --> 01:24:15,880
    she wouldn't be able to get     
    through the gig without it.     

1510
01:24:18,160 --> 01:24:21,960
 She was terrified that            
 the anxiety of performing live    

1511
01:24:21,960 --> 01:24:24,800
            would lead to            
        yet another breakdown.       

1512
01:24:26,200 --> 01:24:28,400
        But despite all that,        

1513
01:24:28,400 --> 01:24:30,600
             she gathered            
        the courage she needed       

1514
01:24:30,640 --> 01:24:34,080
            to get on stage          
 in front of thousands of people. 

1515
01:24:35,440 --> 01:24:38,640
         And even if she was         
      pretty heavily medicated,      

1516
01:24:39,320 --> 01:24:41,040
      she kicked arse out there,     

1517
01:24:41,840 --> 01:24:43,560
         gave it all she had.        

1518
01:24:44,480 --> 01:24:46,600
        I was so proud of her.       

1519
01:24:46,600 --> 01:24:48,520
           [Poly Styrene]           
       One, two, three, four!       

1520
01:24:48,520 --> 01:24:51,200
 ["Oh Bondage Up Yours!" playing] 

1521
01:24:51,200 --> 01:24:52,680
            [Celeste]               
        I joined her on stage        

1522
01:24:52,680 --> 01:24:55,640
            for an encore            
      of "Oh Bondage Up Yours!".     

1523
01:24:57,120 --> 01:24:58,920
        It was beyond amazing.       

1524
01:25:00,360 --> 01:25:03,200
          [Poly Styrene]            
           Bind me, tie me          
        Chain me to the wall        

1525
01:25:03,240 --> 01:25:05,560
              I wanna be            
         A slave to you all         

1526
01:25:05,600 --> 01:25:08,240
       Oh bondage, up yours!       

1527
01:25:08,240 --> 01:25:10,680
        Oh bondage, no more!       

1528
01:25:10,680 --> 01:25:13,360
       Oh bondage, up yours!       

1529
01:25:13,360 --> 01:25:15,480
        Oh bondage, no more!       

1530
01:25:15,480 --> 01:25:17,680
         [music fades out]          

1531
01:25:18,520 --> 01:25:20,640
          [faint cheering]          

1532
01:25:24,720 --> 01:25:28,200
        [soft music playing]        

1533
01:25:42,000 --> 01:25:44,840
          [Poly Styrene]            
       Now the moment had come,      
           I felt strange.           

1534
01:25:46,480 --> 01:25:48,880
      Half scared, half excited.     

1535
01:25:51,440 --> 01:25:53,400
            It was weird             
        looking at the things        

1536
01:25:53,400 --> 01:25:55,560
   I'd always taken for granted.    

1537
01:25:57,560 --> 01:25:59,640
   Never bothered to think about.   

1538
01:26:02,320 --> 01:26:03,840
          Things like pets,          

1539
01:26:04,960 --> 01:26:06,120
               friends,              

1540
01:26:08,680 --> 01:26:10,320
          places I went to.          

1541
01:26:13,000 --> 01:26:15,600
     But I knew I had to go then,    
          or I never would.          

1542
01:26:18,280 --> 01:26:20,800
       [soft music continues]       

1543
01:26:22,760 --> 01:26:24,320
             [Celeste]              
 She had just finished recording   

1544
01:26:24,320 --> 01:26:27,520
 a new album, Generation Indigo   , 

1545
01:26:28,160 --> 01:26:29,200
        when we found out            

1546
01:26:29,200 --> 01:26:30,920
        she had breast cancer.       

1547
01:26:32,560 --> 01:26:33,960
          Those last months,         

1548
01:26:33,960 --> 01:26:35,760
 when we were blissfully unaware   

1549
01:26:35,760 --> 01:26:38,360
       of the disease that had       
     already spread to her bones,    

1550
01:26:39,240 --> 01:26:40,560
 were some of the happiest times   

1551
01:26:40,600 --> 01:26:42,560
     I ever spent with my mother.    

1552
01:26:43,520 --> 01:26:45,280
 We worked together on the album, 

1553
01:26:46,400 --> 01:26:48,800
        writing and recording        
             new tracks.             

1554
01:26:49,640 --> 01:26:51,560
 She was in her element, really,   

1555
01:26:52,320 --> 01:26:53,320
   doing what she knew best.        

1556
01:26:54,680 --> 01:26:57,120
          And I was so lucky         
     to be able to do it with her.   

1557
01:26:58,720 --> 01:27:02,440
 ["Virtual Boyfriend" playing]     
  I hit the button called send  

1558
01:27:02,480 --> 01:27:05,280
  You're my virtual boyfriend    

1559
01:27:05,280 --> 01:27:08,600
  You're like a MySpace friend    
 That's all                       

1560
01:27:09,440 --> 01:27:12,680
  Just a text or a missed call  

1561
01:27:12,680 --> 01:27:17,040
    I just thought it was funny,    
     'cos everybody were having     
    these relationships online.     

1562
01:27:18,280 --> 01:27:20,400
          And it's great,           
   but you never see each other.    

1563
01:27:20,440 --> 01:27:22,280
 Well, you probably do sometimes. 

1564
01:27:22,280 --> 01:27:23,480
        But I just thought,         

1565
01:27:23,480 --> 01:27:25,680
           why not write            
      a love song about that?       

1566
01:27:25,680 --> 01:27:28,240
        You're not meeting,         
       but you're actually...       

1567
01:27:28,280 --> 01:27:31,200
       And then at the end,         
     just press delete to end.      

1568
01:27:32,400 --> 01:27:33,800
              [Youth]               
       I found working with her      

1569
01:27:33,800 --> 01:27:36,040
         very life-affirming.        

1570
01:27:37,360 --> 01:27:40,040
          Even when she was          
     at death's door, ironically.    

1571
01:27:41,240 --> 01:27:45,480
        She had a great              
         spiritual perception        

1572
01:27:45,520 --> 01:27:48,440
          that was wrought           
        from hard experience.        

1573
01:27:57,480 --> 01:28:00,760
         [distant singing]          

1574
01:28:10,400 --> 01:28:12,800
      [ambient music playing]       

1575
01:28:12,800 --> 01:28:16,080
             [Celeste]              
            I finally took           
       my mum's ashes to India,      

1576
01:28:16,640 --> 01:28:18,160
            to Vrindavan,            

1577
01:28:19,040 --> 01:28:21,720
      the holy city on the banks     
         of the Yamuna River,        

1578
01:28:22,600 --> 01:28:25,280
              the place              
       where Krishna was born.       

1579
01:28:26,760 --> 01:28:29,000
      This was her last request.     

1580
01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:35,400
         [insects chirping,         
          cows bellowing]           

1581
01:28:36,400 --> 01:28:39,280
          [birds singing]           

1582
01:28:39,280 --> 01:28:43,320
        Being there was almost       
         metamorphic for me.         

1583
01:28:44,840 --> 01:28:46,720
        I saw with my own eyes       

1584
01:28:46,760 --> 01:28:49,480
      everything she had told me     
           about the place.          

1585
01:28:52,000 --> 01:28:55,240
          Everywhere I went,         
         I felt her presence,        

1586
01:28:56,520 --> 01:29:00,440
 and I was able to understand her 
           a little better.          

1587
01:29:02,640 --> 01:29:06,960
        [traditional singing        
         and music playing]         

1588
01:29:12,760 --> 01:29:15,360
   She'd wanted to take me there    
           for many years.           

1589
01:29:16,440 --> 01:29:19,000
      But a spiritual pilgrimage     
               to India              

1590
01:29:19,000 --> 01:29:22,360
 didn't have much appeal           
 when I was a teenager.            

1591
01:29:25,400 --> 01:29:27,000
       I went through a period       

1592
01:29:27,000 --> 01:29:30,320
     where I rejected everything     
      that my mum cared about,       

1593
01:29:31,640 --> 01:29:34,480
 including her religious beliefs. 

1594
01:29:38,000 --> 01:29:41,200
        [traditional singing        
         and music playing]         

1595
01:29:45,440 --> 01:29:49,000
      [sombre music fades in]       

1596
01:29:52,800 --> 01:29:55,440
     I was angry for a long time.    

1597
01:29:58,000 --> 01:30:01,560
            I felt my mum            
      hadn't lived up to my idea     

1598
01:30:01,600 --> 01:30:04,080
 of what a good mother should be. 

1599
01:30:06,680 --> 01:30:09,720
            I just wished            
         I had normal parents        

1600
01:30:09,720 --> 01:30:11,440
       and a normal childhood,       

1601
01:30:12,720 --> 01:30:15,840
            where my mother          
     didn't have a mental illness,   

1602
01:30:16,520 --> 01:30:18,320
        wasn't a Hare Krishna,       

1603
01:30:18,760 --> 01:30:20,560
          had a regular job,         

1604
01:30:21,680 --> 01:30:24,920
             didn't have             
        so many crazy friends.       

1605
01:30:27,600 --> 01:30:31,240
      But by the time I started      
        to really appreciate         

1606
01:30:31,240 --> 01:30:34,640
           how lucky I was           
 to have such a remarkable woman   

1607
01:30:34,640 --> 01:30:37,080
   as a mother and a role model,    

1608
01:30:37,680 --> 01:30:39,560
           it was too late.          

1609
01:30:40,560 --> 01:30:42,960
      She was leaving her body.      

1610
01:30:45,520 --> 01:30:47,520
      [sombre music continues]      

1611
01:30:49,080 --> 01:30:51,880
          [Hazel Emmons]            
         Everything about her        
          was inspirational.         

1612
01:30:53,080 --> 01:30:55,720
     She was born an inspiration.    
             [laughs]               

1613
01:30:55,720 --> 01:30:58,040
       She was, she was just...      

1614
01:30:58,040 --> 01:30:59,880
         That's who she was.         

1615
01:30:59,880 --> 01:31:01,920
         That's who she was.         

1616
01:31:02,760 --> 01:31:05,320
        [soft music playing]        

1617
01:31:06,280 --> 01:31:07,720
            [Don Letts]             
 The legacy of someone like Poly   

1618
01:31:07,720 --> 01:31:10,040
        cannot be overstated.        

1619
01:31:10,640 --> 01:31:12,000
             What she did            

1620
01:31:12,040 --> 01:31:13,240
      stands as a great example      
             for women,              

1621
01:31:14,720 --> 01:31:17,240
 not only in the 21st century,     
 I think it'll stand forever.      

1622
01:31:18,080 --> 01:31:20,040
     Because she was brave, man.     

1623
01:31:23,800 --> 01:31:25,080
          [Neneh Cherry]            
          There is something         

1624
01:31:25,120 --> 01:31:27,040
           in Poly's sound           
          and in her voice,          

1625
01:31:27,040 --> 01:31:29,000
          in her expression,         
            in her lyrics            

1626
01:31:29,000 --> 01:31:30,520
         and in who she was.         

1627
01:31:31,720 --> 01:31:33,440
            You could say            
       it's anti-establishment,      

1628
01:31:33,440 --> 01:31:36,760
 or it's anti-this and anti-...    
 But for me it was like,           

1629
01:31:36,760 --> 01:31:38,840
             I could see             
        that it was possible.        

1630
01:31:38,840 --> 01:31:40,720
        That it was important        

1631
01:31:40,760 --> 01:31:44,640
          to fight against           
        the predictable holes        

1632
01:31:44,640 --> 01:31:47,600
   that we are all surrounded by    
          as human beings,           

1633
01:31:47,640 --> 01:31:49,400
       but particularly women.       

1634
01:31:50,680 --> 01:31:52,840
       [soft music continues,       
           bells ringing]           

1635
01:31:52,880 --> 01:31:56,840
           [Gina Birch]             
         For me, her legacy          
       was to open up the box,       

1636
01:31:56,840 --> 01:31:58,840
       give everyone new tools,      

1637
01:31:58,840 --> 01:32:02,480
            and new ideas            
        and new possibilities.       

1638
01:32:06,520 --> 01:32:08,080
          [Pauline Black]           
     The world is playing catch-up   

1639
01:32:08,120 --> 01:32:09,560
          with Poly Styrene,         

1640
01:32:09,560 --> 01:32:11,200
      not the other way around.      

1641
01:32:15,400 --> 01:32:17,840
          [Bruno Wizard]            
        When I saw her, like,        
   three days before she passed,    

1642
01:32:17,840 --> 01:32:19,200
           she said to me,           

1643
01:32:19,200 --> 01:32:20,880
         "You see the lights         
           on the trees?"            

1644
01:32:20,880 --> 01:32:23,360
     "Every one of those lights      
     is like a soul who's passed."   

1645
01:32:24,640 --> 01:32:25,840
   There was something out there    

1646
01:32:25,880 --> 01:32:27,640
              and in the             
        not-too-distant future       

1647
01:32:27,680 --> 01:32:29,240
     she was going to be part of.    

1648
01:32:30,680 --> 01:32:33,480
       [soft music continues]       

1649
01:32:37,480 --> 01:32:39,760
            [Celeste]               
             I remember              
       the last time I saw her       

1650
01:32:39,760 --> 01:32:41,720
        like it was yesterday.       

1651
01:32:44,080 --> 01:32:47,080
     A piece of me died that day.    

1652
01:32:49,160 --> 01:32:50,720
         I cried even though         

1653
01:32:50,720 --> 01:32:54,040
        my Mum always told me        
       not to cry for the dead.      

1654
01:32:58,880 --> 01:33:01,520
               She said              
       it's just the beginning,      

1655
01:33:03,080 --> 01:33:05,680
   even if it feels like the end.   

1656
01:33:07,040 --> 01:33:10,520
       [soft music continues]       

1657
01:33:21,680 --> 01:33:25,320
         [music fades out]          

1658
01:33:28,840 --> 01:33:30,720
           [Poly Styrene]           
   I am a cliché.                   

1659
01:33:31,840 --> 01:33:36,040
          ["I Am a Cliché"          
       by X-Ray Spex playing]       

1660
01:33:41,880 --> 01:33:43,960
    I'm a cliché                   
   I'm a cliché                    

1661
01:33:44,000 --> 01:33:45,680
    I'm a cliché                   
   I'm a cliché                    

1662
01:33:45,680 --> 01:33:47,880
             I'm a cliché           
         You've seen before         

1663
01:33:47,880 --> 01:33:49,640
             I'm a cliché           
           Live next door           

1664
01:33:49,680 --> 01:33:51,840
             I'm a cliché           
        You know what I mean        

1665
01:33:51,880 --> 01:33:54,040
            I'm a cliché            
          Pink is obscene           

1666
01:33:55,600 --> 01:33:57,880
  Huri yama yama                  
 Huri yama yama                   

1667
01:33:57,880 --> 01:33:59,880
          Boredom, boredom         

1668
01:33:59,880 --> 01:34:01,840
  Huri yama yama                  
 Huri yama yama                   

1669
01:34:01,840 --> 01:34:04,120
          Boredom, boredom