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Love.
We're all looking for love.
It's one big adventure.
If you're lucky, you'll find love.
Or sometimes it finds you.
Tell me, how do you see our future?
Very rosy.
No, I don't know. I…
I just go with the flow.
I want to live in the moment. With you.
SOUTH AFRICA
Look!
Honey, come here. Look there.
How cool.
This is wonderful, but we can't live like this forever.
Why not?
Because this isn't real life.
And why isn't this real life?
It's a perfect life that others can only dream about.
SWITZERLAND
AUSTRALIA
BRAZIL
ENGLAND
FRANCE
ITALY
Don't you want children?
No.
You're enough to make me happy.
That's sweet,
but seriously,
don't you want children?
No.
Love.
Whoever came up with that?
Who really knows what love is and when they've found it?
They say it's so easy, so why do we make it so complicated?
-Are you all right? -Yes, I'm okay.
Thank you for putting together all the photos.
No problem. Omie was like a grandma to me too.
Thank you.
There's a slideshow on here with music.
-Thank you. -Shall we see if they have a computer?
Take Said.
He found the love of his life in Bo.
He'll do anything to make her happy.
Although sometimes he takes it too far.
But Bo loves him, even though she could strangle him at times.
Seriously, Said?
I'll miss you, Omie. How sweet you look there.
Sweetie.
Are you coming?
Yes. Have fun in heaven, Omie.
Oh, Bo.
I missed you so much.
For Kiki, love is a game.
The more men you date, the faster you'll find Mr. Right.
The three of us are single and ready to mingle.
I'm getting married!
-Really? -For once, today isn't about you.
For a beautiful woman, you have to do it right.
-Otherwise they're gone. -Congratulations!
I'm so happy for you.
Why is she here?
Cindy thought it was a good idea to fall in love with my ex.
All I'll say is karma is a bitch.
-Congratulations. -Thank you.
Who's the father?
Dammit, Jack! Take some fucking responsibility.
-Who says it's mine? -Goddamn it.
You can have him.
Good luck. He's only ever loved one person. Himself.
And you all knew about this?
-Sorry. -You deserve each other.
Nice belly.
My condolences.
Thank you.
I know these moments can be difficult.
Be strong.
Bitch.
Jack, my ex. He only loves himself.
I really don't know why I ever looked for love there.
He doesn't know how to deal with love.
Look!
That's the heart. Can you see it?
-Everything looks fine. -Great.
I have to take this, sweetheart.
Jack, you're not going to make me deal with this alone.
No, I'm on my way.
If you're not here in ten minutes, I'm leaving.
-Jack? -A few minutes, yes?
-I have to go to the funeral. -Couldn't you have said that earlier?
Funny. One arrives, another leaves.
I'll call you.
Doctor.
And when you think you're done with love, it turns up when you least expect it.
-It's not there. -Try that one, then.
-Try that one. -I'm clicking it.
We can't open the slideshow, but we'll try it another way.
Yes. My thing, okay?
Turn it off!
Welcome.
We are gathered here because of our love for Omie.
We are here as family,
as friends, relatives, and acquaintances.
Although you wonder what some people are doing here.
Omie always said, "You give love because you want to,
not because you want something in return."
She taught me that most people are only passing through your life,
and you should be grateful for the lessons they teach you.
Don't worry. Just a call from the afterlife.
Wrap it up.
Nothing wrong.
Thank you, Omie, for all--
I'll fix it.
Got it!
I just can't believe Omie is gone.
I mean, she was such a lovely woman.
One of the few people who really understood me.
She was also fond of you. Strangely enough. Bye.
I was fond of her too.
Before I forget, can you pick up your stuff next month?
I'm selling the house.
Do you really want to talk about this now?
House prices are skyrocketing. I can make three times as much.
Hey, Lies, I heard--
Can everyone leave me in peace for two minutes? Thank you.
Yes, of course.
-Condolences on your loss. -Noah?
-Why are you here? -You think I'd miss Omie's funeral?
Sweet of you to come.
-It's been far too long. -Yes.
You look beautiful.
Wait. Is this "cheese-and-meat" Noah?
Did you have liposuction? You look fucking delicious.
I've given up cheese soufflés, yes.
What do you do these days?
I rent out a few villas in Ibiza.
Ibiza. I want to go for my bachelorette party.
I'm getting married.
Feel free to come. There's plenty of room.
Sounds lovely, but now isn't a good time.
Great.
Go play outside.
It was a nice service.
You did well by Lisa.
Maybe a career change?
-You were supposed to delete the video. -I know, but…
I wasn't going to show anyone, and those USBs all look the same.
Give me that thing.
It's still at the undertaker's.
Hey, babe, don't worry. I'll go get it.
Then we'll delete it together, okay?
Sweetie, sweetheart, listen. You're upset, yes? And I get it.
But let me fix it, then we'll talk.
No, Said.
I think we should go our separate ways.
FOR SALE
The house is in good shape.
I renovated it two years ago, so it can go on sale tomorrow.
INCOMING CALL
-Wasn't I clear? -I wanted to check how you're doing.
-How was the service? -Very nice.
You could have been there.
Lies.
I miss you.
-You should have thought of that earlier. -Yes, it's empty.
-Sorry, I have to go. -That's very good.
If I give you the keys, you can arrange the viewings.
-All good. -Yes?
Jack. What is this?
What do you mean? We're selling the house, remember?
I didn't agree to this.
I'm selling the house anyway.
You have about two weeks to pack your things.
Don't forget it's my house too.
Leave or I'm calling my attorney.
You mean my attorney.
Bye, Jack.
See what I mean?
That's why we split. She's so selfish.
So, is it time for Mommy to soap you up?
-What the fuck are you doing here? -Why am I here? I live here!
Why does your mom want to wash me?
I thought you were Jack.
Okay, would you mind covering that up?
Shit, sorry, babe. I forgot to say that Said would be staying a while.
Forgot? How the fuck do you forget?
Okay. Everyone out of my bathroom. Now!
Said, come. Don't be so angry, babe.
We helped you out once as well.
And were you staring just then?
Use your ass, Lies, like this. Put some effort in.
What's in the case, granite?
No, pumps, makeup, a pleasure pole.
What?
Vibrator.
You brought a vibrator to your bachelorette party?
Yes, I need to stay in shape.
I can't just ask someone on the island.
Wait, 300?
He wants 300 for that short trip?
How about instead I kick you in the kloot?
No, shit. All my stuff is still in that shitty cab.
Don't worry. You could do with a new wardrobe.
We're in Ibiza, not at church.
They've been here two minutes and are fighting already.
All my stuff is in that taxi.
I offered to pick you up at the airport, but you refused.
-But I'm here now. -Without your case.
I'll show you the house.
Welcome. Leave the cases here.
Here's bedroom one. Bathrooms are on the left.
And the patio.
And this is the kitchen.
And here…
Open that if you want.
Wow, this is really… I don't know what to say.
Well,
this speaks for itself.
Are you sure we can stay? This is really too much.
Just enjoy yourself. Looks like you could do with it.
Noah, if I'd known earlier, I'd have come every summer.
Are you still single? If so, I'll break it off with Johnnie.
I'd keep hold of Johnnie.
Oh, so you have someone already?
-I didn't say that. -Oh, mysterious. I like it.
By the way, I have a friend who's single.
-Her there in the granny blouse. -Kiek.
I'm going over there…
I've got stuff to do at the club.
Make yourselves at home, okay?
-Call if you need me. -Yeah.
I'll do that.
The water is great here.
Guys!
-If you don't do it with him, I will. -You do it with everyone.
He really is great, Lies.
This is the last time we're all single, so let's have fun.
You're not single, are you?
That's not the point.
Come, let's take a photo.
This side. That's my good side.
MISSED CALLS
Yeah.
One, two, three.
Ibiza!
-Do you really need that? -Of course.
And I'm looking for a breast pump. I want to breastfeed.
You need a device for that?
Yes, it's useful for work and lets you give a bottle at night.
And we need to find a place to live. Shall I move in with you?
-Isn't that a bit fast? -Fast? We're going fast already.
We're only here because you forgot your pill.
And you chose to keep it without discussing it with me.
-So you're putting it all on me? -I'm not saying that.
Is it even my child?
You're such an incredible dick.
Disgusting!
Hey, have you arrived?
-Excuse me? -Yeah, what a view, hey?
A beer on the beach, sounds great.
You're doing better than me, but that position here is still open.
-Hello? -Yes?
I've got my legs spread here.
Listen. Just drop by and we'll talk about it.
Yes?
Say hi from me. Yes, got to go. Sorry. Bye.
This is unbelievable.
-I felt him. -Are you going to talk to Said?
I don't know. Should I really put up with all his blunders?
He's staying with us.
Is that a problem?
No, but I hope it doesn't last too long.
I want my privacy back.
So, you're lying down and taking it easy?
That isn't funny.
Okay, everything looks great and…
Would…
Would you like a copy of the photo?
-Yes. -Yes?
-Do it. -Yes, great.
How do you do this? It feels like my boobies are falling out.
-Great. Free the nipple. -You could have borrowed from me.
And look like a retired librarian? No.
Why don't you get us some drinks from Rico Suave? Go on.
I can't believe you're getting married.
I speak Dutch.
How'd you know I was Dutch?
Let's say it was your accent.
So, two mojitos and a screaming orgasm.
Excuse me?
The name of the drink. I recommend it.
Well, in that case, give me two mojitos
and a screaming orgasm.
And whose name shall I put it under?
-Angela. -Javier.
So, two mojitos and a screaming orgasm for Angela.
Coming up.
Look who's here.
-Fuck. How do I look? -Great, don't change anything.
Ladies, enjoying yourselves?
Yes. Thanks for the tip.
-It's a nice place. -Great view.
Nice dress.
Yes, it's not really my style. It belongs to Kiki.
It looks great on you.
Do you want to dance?
Since when do you dance? You were always so uptight.
Okay, I won't force you.
No, please. Let me see.
-See you, Kiek. -Of course.
Don't mind me. My days of pleasure are numbered anyway.
Camarero! Double whisky, please.
And quickly. Pronto. Bring the bottle.
-I used to be madly in love with you. -What?
I was always crazy about you too.
I was always waiting around so we could talk to each other.
That's why I kept running into you.
-Why didn't you ever say anything? -I didn't know how to tell you.
You seem to be doing okay.
Lisa!
Are you okay?
I lost all my cards.
Nice surprise, really.
Smell that? Your pet hasn't showered in five days.
It's just sitting around all day.
-Is that my bathrobe? -Honey, he had nothing else.
I'll buy you a new one.
Jack, I'm pregnant.
I want my privacy back.
What do you want me to do?
Just abandon him?
How many times has Bo kicked him out?
-It's only been three times. -In six months.
Because he always fucks up.
A sex tape at a funeral. That could happen to anyone.
I want him out by the end of the week.
I'll think of something, yeah?
Loser.
What are you doing?
Married for 11 years to a woman who no longer wants me.
Bo will want you back anyway.
I don't know. She's not answering my calls or my texts.
Think of something nice.
Surprise her. Women like that sort of thing.
What though?
Be a man.
But shower first. You smell like a hot day at the zoo.
Yeah.
Looks good on you.
Keep it. As a souvenir.
I feel so stupid.
It could only happen to me.
Yeah, you haven't changed much.
-And you jumped in after me. -I didn't know if you could swim.
And I would do it again.
-Move, I'm standing here. -A bit further over.
-What are you doing? -I go here.
Can't you read? You have to stand there.
-I want to stand here. -Go there!
-I'm done with this. -What are you doing? Souf, come here!
Handsome Max, one, two
Rub, rub, rub, rub, rub, rub Rub your duck
Suck it with it
Put that rubber duck in your mouth
My hands grab your ass
Talk to the rubber ducky
You never even knew you had it
Now you're proud of it And play with it in the bath
Of course, they come in all sizes
They have a name and quack with double Q
Boom!
-And? -Ferry.
It's so lame I could cry.
-Handsome Max? -Yes.
It sounds like he came out of some bad episode of Miami Vice.
Yeah, but young people are following him.
And he's still a free agent, so you can reel him in.
He's got zero talent and no doubt a huge ego.
The guy with no talent has 40 million YouTube views.
Half of which were probably bought.
That may be how you do business here,
but my following is larger than all your artists combined.
Wait up.
I didn't know you. And I'm sure I'm not the only one.
-I don't need you. Why should I sign? -Do you perform in sold-out venues?
I didn't think so.
Give me one month,
then see where you are.
One month.
But not a day longer.
I can feel something blossoming between you two.
What is…
Isn't that your man?
-Yes, he's mine. -Isn't your anniversary next week?
Yes.
Intense.
WHORE
So, sluts. Enjoyed fucking?
Kiek, not so loud.
Uptight dolls like you get laid
while I'm stuck here with my dried-out box.
From now on, it's all about you.
We'll make it a great day.
It feels great to be shaken around again.
See, you can have fun with us too.
Yes, just us girls and no men. Like in the old days.
-Isn't that Javier? -Oh, yes.
Look, how sweet. He's brought his mother along.
It looks like he's busy. Come on, let's keep walking.
Wait, look at that. You see, good men do still exist.
Oh, that really is too cute.
-What the fuck? -Yes, I need to tell you something.
Javier is a kind of…
-If you, you know… -Yeah, what?
-You hire Javier for sex. -What?
They're called male escorts.
-Kiki, you can't do this. -I did it for Angela, okay?
She's been dry for 100 years. That's unhealthy.
Oh God, what if I caught an STD?
Don't be ridiculous. Was the sex good? Because I paid a lot for it.
Can you keep your mouth shut for once?
No, you were first.
-Okay, thank you. -Take it.
Thank you.
How long now?
Another few weeks, but I'm really fed up with it.
I can't wait to order sushi and open a bottle of wine.
-What about sleeping on your front? -Divine!
You're kidding me? 1,200 euros for a stroller?
Jack, this is the Rolls-Royce of strollers.
Feel it. Leather. It unfolds three ways. Reinforced cup holder.
-You can run with this thing. -Did you forget your balls or what?
-Do you have a stroller? -No, not yet.
You can go miles with this thing.
You'll be happy if--
-What are you doing? -Come!
You're in a baby store. You can't--
Listen. I'm going to tell you something, but you can't tell anyone.
-Swear it. -Yes, okay. I swear.
Do you see the woman talking to Cindy?
Yes.
She's pregnant too.
I can see that. We are in a baby store.
Listen, I'm…
I'm kind of the father.
Maybe a little…
How the fuck do you keep doing this? Ever heard of condoms?
I don't judge you and your wife, okay?
-Are you going to help me or not? -No!
If Bo finds out I'm involved with this, my marriage is over. No.
-Without me, you'd be sleeping rough. -Your love life brings misfortune.
Are you going to help me?
Yes, okay.
-Shall we? -Okay.
Do you have…
My brother-in-law.
You're pregnant.
With babies in your bellies.
They need to sleep. So, sleeping bags.
-Where is-- -Your husband?
He left his phone in the car.
I'll give him a ring, then.
Fuck.
Oh, that's where he left it.
He's pressing on my bladder. I have to go before I have another accident.
Great, huh? Being pregnant?
Totally. Well, good luck with everything. Bye.
-Hey. What do you think of this? -Nice.
But it was expensive.
Only the best for the child. This too?
-Sleeping bag. Look. -Great.
Hey. Where was it?
When you're better, you can come and see us in the studio.
-Really? -Yes, of course.
-Can I beatbox? -Well…
-Of course you can. -Yes!
But only if you let me participate in the song.
I'll write the lyrics tomorrow.
Very good.
We're a little sick But we'll soon get better
No lying, no, we really mean it
Just stay strong for a bit Hold on for a while
We'll soon get better, then have…
-Fun! -That's what I'm talking about.
-What do you think about my new artist? -Super talent.
-Really? -I should sign you up now.
-You hear that? -Thank you.
Call me if you need me. I'll see you soon.
-All right. -Get better soon.
Stop that. Vulture!
Not here. Have some respect.
There are children here.
Those guys are following me everywhere.
That's why some artists do it.
To create a little goodwill.
This is worth more than a few likes or views.
I totally agree with you.
I have something for you.
-What? -I can't show you here.
-Coming? -Yes.
-Bye. -Bye.
Handsome Max, one, two
Rub, rub, rub, rub, rub, rub Rub your duck
How on earth did you manage this?
I told you I was good.
And I have a nice product.
So I know how to sell it right.
But the Ziggo Dome? That's almost too good to be true.
I think it's really great.
As things stand, you've sold it out three times.
-Three times? -Yes.
It wouldn't have been possible without you.
I'm here to make your life easier.
I could get used to it.
What are you doing?
I'm married.
Going okay?
According to the manual, it can be done in 30 minutes,
but I've been at it a while. Here.
-Can you try? -I'll do it tomorrow.
It would be good to have the room ready before the baby is born.
You know what would be good? If we'd hired someone.
Then we'd be done already and have time for other things.
It's nice to do things together.
-Team building, fun. -My idea of fun is very different.
-Are you coming tomorrow? -What?
To pregnancy class.
And spend the whole day panting?
-Just tell me how to pant afterwards. -It's your baby too.
Yes, I know that. Can we talk about something else?
All day, it's "baby this, baby that." I'm a bit tired of it.
-I'm getting a bit tired of you. -Oh God.
-Of your pregnancy hormones. -I'm not in the mood for this.
-Running away again? -Yes. Good luck with the cabinet.
A baby really costs a lot, right?
1,200 fucking euros for a fucking stroller.
-Isn't that ridiculous? -And you'll have twice the costs.
What's wrong with you. Having your period or something?
You got two women pregnant. How could you do that to Cindy?
Yeah, I know.
Come on, man. It's going too far, even for you.
-You have to tell her. -I need time.
Time? Soon you'll have two babies to look after.
How will you do that? Like your father?
-I'm not my father. -You're starting to look like him.
Maybe you should focus more on your own relationship.
-Yes. But at least I'm working on it. -What work? Here…
NEW LOVE FOR HANDSOME MAX?
-What is this? -What the fuck is this? This is Bo.
Is it real?
Yes.
A fortune-teller. I've always wanted to try that.
No need. I can see your future. Three screaming children,
no sleep, and a man who spends his days in bed
with the neighbor.
It'll be fun.
Noah is 100 times better than that failure Jim.
Really, he was such a loser.
I'm so glad you're over him. What a disappointment he was.
Traveling the world with you,
then he just drops you like a heavy backpack.
When I hear his name, Jim, I feel like I wanna puke.
I can feel bile rising. What?
How long have you been here?
Long enough.
Why are you here?
Can we talk somewhere quiet?
That's not necessary. You can say it here.
Sweetheart, I was wrong.
I should never have let you go.
You're the woman of my life.
I'm here to ask if you'll give me another chance.
You come here, interrupt Kiki's party, and expect me to jump into your arms?
You had your chance.
Lies, I'm sorry.
You're too late, Jim.
Cind, are you okay?
He'll come around when the baby is born.
With men, it always takes more time, but it will be okay.
I hope so.
Have you heard from Bo?
She's too busy with her new toy boy.
What?
Bo's cheating on me.
No.
Maybe it's photoshopped? You know what the tabloids are like.
Thanks for trying to give it a positive spin,
but, come on, we can both see what this is.
So you're quitting?
What should I do?
Fight?
For both of you, for the kids, for her.
Have you ever considered couple's therapy?
Having airy talks with someone about your feelings? I don't know.
What are you doing?
There. Now you can't back out.
LET'S GO TO THERAPY
CALLING
Did you order a limousine?
I can walk. I'm already sorry I called you.
All right.
No, Jim. Wait!
No, Jim!
Just kidding. Get in, then.
He asked me to go to couple's therapy.
Surprising.
Yes, quite.
I've suggested it for years, but he wasn't interested.
Will you do it?
I don't know.
Maybe.
The kids miss him too.
Too?
-Want to see the baby's room? -Yes.
-Hey, honey. -Hey.
I hope you don't mind. I know you wanted to do it yourself.
I think it's fabulous.
Well, it's nothing. Hopefully you can get some rest now.
It's beautiful.
Nice of you to help.
I'll leave you two a moment.
-Friday, twelve o'clock at the therapist. -Really?
-I'll be there. -Okay.
Door.
Don't forget that corner.
So…
-Yes. -Yeah.
It was nice.
Yeah.
I missed you.
I missed us.
Let's take it slowly, okay?
Slowly?
No. Slowly is perfect.
Great. She's doing it with two men. You've got a gigolo. I'm a fucking nun.
You know you've got Johnnie, hey, Kiek?
-That's not the issue right now. -Hi.
Noah?
What's all this?
A surprise.
For the prettiest woman on the island.
You shouldn't have.
I'm so happy to have you back in my life.
I never thought I'd fall in love with someone I met in ninth grade.
And how do you see your relationship?
I bend over backwards to show her I can change and want to change.
And what do I get in return? Seeing her date some dime-store rapper.
That isn't true. I work for him.
Work? Keeping his vocal chords lubricated with your tongue?
He kissed me, Said. I immediately told him I was married.
-So you're not dating him? -No, of course I'm not.
Would I be sitting here?
Yes, good. This is a good start.
And, Said?
You want her to see you as a man.
How could you make contact with her from your masculine side?
By
taking more initiative?
Without her having to ask.
Yes.
And I could
help more around the house?
That would be nice.
I could help more with the kids?
Yes.
I could initiate sex?
No.
-Aren't I suppose to take the initiative? -Not in those things.
Just other things. You should surprise me.
Did you listen to Bo?
It might be a good idea to take some notes here.
No, of course not.
Surprise her.
Yeah.
Easy, right?
How's it going with the therapist?
-Is it any good? -She says I should take more initiative.
And Bo says I should surprise her, but not with flowers.
You should send a dick pic.
No way, idiot. I'm not 15.
Jack, fuck off! Keep your anaconda to yourself.
Don't act as if you've never seen it.
Looks good, right?
If you ever send me another picture of your wiener, I'll fight you.
Do you trust me?
-Do you trust me? -Yeah.
Send a dick pic.
Women like that.
-Amateur. Never use flash. -Is the flash no good?
No flash. You see all sorts of things you didn't even know were there.
You live and learn.
You got it?
-Hey? -Yes, I think so.
Let me see.
-Let me see. -Wait.
-Yeah. -Good, right?
Yeah.
No way, man. Absolutely not.
EMAIL SENT TO THERAPIST
No!
I sent it to the couple's therapist by mistake.
What? How did you manage that?
She's called Bodet, and her name came up.
You can delete app messages before they get read.
-I sent it by email. -What, email? How?
How can you email a dick pic? It's not 2010.
Fuck, it's been sent.
Okay, we have to hack her email.
And I know how to do that? Who do you think I am, Black Bond?
If we get her laptop, we can delete the email.
-How do you plan on doing that? -Everything's in the cloud these days.
-We have to go to her house. -So we're going to break in?
No.
Listen, I don't care.
But it's your junk on her computer. Bo won't like that.
He saw me with Noah. Now everything is screwed.
He'll understand if you explain it.
Did you talk to Javier?
You mean Deuce Bigalow, Old Lady Gigolo?
No. And I don't have any desire to.
-This holiday sucks. -Right.
The day is young, the men are horny, and I want to party.
Suzan and Freek.
Kiki!
Take it off!
Ah, Kiki!
Angela…
-It isn't what you think. -No?
It's exactly what I think.
Making out with the entire island for money. Goddamn it, man.
Okay, you're right. I am indeed an escort.
But I only do it to keep my bar.
Please. Spare me your bullshit.
I have money problems. And not just little ones.
This is the quickest way to earn money.
With you, it's different.
With you, I feel things that
I've never felt before.
With you, it's real.
-But you felt the connection too, right? -I can't deal with this right now!
Hey, MacGyver.
-Is it open? -Keep watch.
Warn me if someone comes, but do it quietly.
Fuck!
…more pleasure now you know me.
Good evening, sir.
-Yeah. -What are you doing?
I'm looking for a house to buy.
Is that forbidden, officer?
-I don't believe this house is for sale. -No, not this one.
But I saw "For Sale" signs on the street, so thought I'd take a look.
With the market as it is, it's best to be prepared.
We've received a report that someone went in the window.
Right, Piet?
Did you actually say that? Did you just call me Black Pete?
No, my colleague is Piet, and we're looking for a suspect.
So you just arrest the first dark-skinned man you see on the street?
That's not what I meant.
I'm the only one here. So you must mean me.
-You're the suspect, yes. -This is ethnic profiling, ma'am.
Just stay here. My colleague will take a look. Then you can go.
What is your name?
Mike.
Yes.
-Hey, sweetheart. -Hi.
-Can I call you back? -I don't even know why I called.
Actually, I do know why.
Our anniversary.
I didn't forget.
We should be celebrating together.
Yeah, I really want things to go back to how they were.
Get lost, creep!
We're armed, and I've called the police.
-Bo, I can explain. -Unbelievable!
-I needed emergency therapy. -Bye, Said.
Said?
What are you doing here?
Again, apologies for the inconvenience.
No, it's okay. You're just doing your job.
-Right, Ms. Officer? -Call me Merel.
-Hey! Freeze! -Are you crazy?
Can't I at least try?
-Jack? -Final warning!
-Freeze or I'll tase you. -Okay. I won't move.
Okay, calm down.
I…
I know the owner of the house. I swear, I can explain.
I sent a dick pic,
and it went wrong because I listened to Jack again.
So if you tase anyone, tase Jack.
A bottle of vodka and some glasses.
Did someone die?
It's a party. You can smile a bit.
Angela won't talk to me.
Fascinating. Do you like her?
Oh, you really do like her.
Here. Drink this.
You'll feel better.
Where is everyone?
Lisa?
Well, looks like you want a ride with us.
Well, not really, you know.
You can't do that here.
Don't move.
Back already?
Did you have fun?
Well,
I got sandwiched between three oiled-up men in thongs, so…
Sounds like a great evening.
Hey, I…
I've been thinking for a while about leaving this life behind.
And…
this just feels so good.
I'm ready to move back to the Netherlands
and get closer to you.
Noah.
You really are a sweetheart, but I can't do this.
I'm still in love with my ex.
I'm sorry.
-Oh no. Not again! -Heavy night?
I hope I don't have to add a gigolo to my list now.
Wait a sec…
Don't worry about it. You were too drunk to do anything.
It would have been the biggest mistake of my life.
Thanks.
I've got such a headache.
I've got aspirin in my van.
Great. Can I have them all?
I'd let her arrest me any day.
I think she likes me too.
Look, I've got a token of her love.
This is all a joke to you, right?
Why so sensitive? You're talking like you've been locked up for ten years.
-It will make a funny story at a bar. -A funny story?
Do you realize I could lose Bo over this shit?
Why so angry with me? I helped you, not the other way around.
You advised me to send a dick pic like some horny teenager.
But not to the therapist.
-Know what your problem is? -Calm down.
-You bring misfortune. -You're exaggerating.
No, I'm not.
Whenever I listen to you, I fuck up my life more.
And you know why? Because Jack only cares about Jack.
You have Cindy, but you'll be losing her soon.
I won't end up like you. I don't want anything more to do with you.
Hey. Come on, man. Said.
Good morning.
That ex of yours is a lucky guy.
I'll get that.
-Buenos días. -Buenos días.
This lady claims she is staying here.
Is that correct?
Yes. She's one of my guests. Could you tell me what happened?
In the future, take better care of your guests.
Thank you.
Lies.
Lisa.
What happened?
I was locked up because they thought I was a prostitute.
Because I was looking for a taxi and they threw me on the hood
and put me in cuffs and threw me in a cell.
And there were big, scary criminals and cockroaches all over me.
-I'm traumatized for life. -Oh, sweetie.
What a shitty night.
Whatever Kiki may say,
she certainly got a memorable bachelorette party.
Where is Kiki? I thought she was with you.
-Kiki didn't come back? -No.
-Agua? -Thanks.
-I can't get married like this. -Oh? I think it's a nice dress.
Not the dress. I don't know if I'm ready to get married.
Oh yeah. That is a problem.
I love Johnnie very much, but I don't know if this is what I want.
Of course, you think I'm crazy.
No. I understand better than you think.
If you find someone who makes this terrible existence
even a little more tolerable,
you have to keep hold of them.
-I just don't want to get married. -Then you need to be honest.
For yourself, but also for Johnnie.
-Just be honest? -Yes.
That's not a bad idea.
You're okay, actually.
Say what you want, but it was certainly surprising.
-This is not normal, Said. -I had to show initiative, right?
The intention was good. The execution could have been better.
But I stuck to the brief.
Darling, hey. I could have sent it to your mother too.
I've seen plenty of crazy situations in my career, but this beats them all.
I can't help you anymore.
Well, we tried.
No, Bo, wait! I know I've screwed up recently,
but I've seen what I don't want, which is to end up like Jack.
I don't want to wake up every day and wonder where you are or with whom.
I want to come home each day to my wife and children.
I don't know, Said.
Sweetheart, I may screw up, but I mean well.
Tell me what to do and I'll do it.
Maybe we could try and eat together a few times a week.
With the kids. See how it goes.
I really won't let you down.
And exhale.
Focus closely on your breathing.
-We are all one energy together. -Cind.
-Jack. Come here. -Yeah.
-What happened? -A minor incident.
-You should see the other guy. -I'd rather not.
-How is the baby? -It's good you're here.
What should I do?
-Pay attention. -Okay.
This is my husband, Jack.
Oh, so
this is your husband. Jack.
-This is Monica. -Hi. Nice to meet you.
I have to stand a while.
Go help Monica.
She's all alone.
-So? -Listen--
Tut-tut. Shoes off.
And now imagine that the time has really come.
Breathe out hard. It's coming.
I can explain, okay?
Don't touch me, you dirty bastard!
That's right.
You're a goddess.
You're all goddesses. Let it out.
I hate men!
It's the hormones.
-Jack? -Yes?
Here, can you just…
-Yeah, just massage. -Here?
Yes.
-What did you think? -I enjoyed it.
-And it's more than just panting. -I told you so.
-There's another one next week. -I'll be on time.
Shall I help Monica with her bags?
It's a shame she has to do it alone.
-Yes, go on. That's sweet. -Yeah.
Let me explain.
What kind of monster are you?
-You didn't want me there for you. -I'm curious what Cindy thinks of this.
Cindy has nothing to do with it.
Really? How long are you going to keep this up?
Stay away from Cindy, all right?
You should stay away from me.
Your wife is waiting.
Yeah.
Maybe she's lying in a ditch or got kidnapped by a drug cartel.
Think about it. Where did you last see her?
In the club with Javier.
Kiek!
Where were you? We've searched half the island.
I was sobering up on the beach.
The most important thing is you're safe.
I'm so glad.
Sorry again, about yesterday.
My reaction was really narrow-minded.
It's okay.
I'd have done the same in your shoes.
I'm quitting as an escort. It's not worth it.
What about your bar?
I don't know. I'll figure something out.
You know what? Maybe I can help you.
I'm very good with figures.
Sounds good.
Thanks for bringing Kiki back safely.
That wasn't me.
It was Jim.
Jim? Is Jim here?
I tried everything, but he didn't want to come in.
Hello? What are you waiting for? Go after him!
Jim!
I'm too late.
INCOMING CALL
Welcome.
-Congratulations, it's a girl. -Yes!
ARAM REAL ESTATE
Why are you here?
I'm sorry.
I acted immaturely.
I want to be there for you.
I don't need you, Jack.
Our child shouldn't have to go without. It needs a father.
My son doesn't need a father like you.
We're having a son?
I'm having a son, yes.
Johnnie…
I don't know if I want to get married.
Okay, but
we have something good, right?
That isn't it. I don't know if I'm ready for such a big step.
Do you love me?
Of course, you have no idea how much.
So what are we talking about? Let's just stay as we are.
I don't have to get married. As long as I'm with you.
That's the only thing I want.
Come here.
Congratulations, Omie.
I hope you can drink endless advocaats with whipped cream up there.
Why are you here?
I knew it was Omie's birthday.
-Her birthdays were always real parties. -Yeah.
Everything okay?
Yeah.
It isn't okay.
I've screwed up everything in my life. I hurt the people I love.
And I don't know if I can be a good father.
You're not your father.
You got a woman pregnant. Be there for her.
It's never too late to become an adult.
Everyone makes mistakes.
I want you to keep the house.
We'll sort it out. We'll think of something.
-You mean it? -Yes, I do.
Can you come to the attorney's tomorrow?
Yes.
-Thanks. -Okay.
Ah, two. One, two, three, four.
Yes, three.
No cheating, Souf.
Watch your brother, I know he's going to cheat.
Souf, hands off the pawns, you cheat!
Is Bo home?
Yes. With her husband and children.
She'll be in the office on Monday. You can take photos then.
-Listen. -Listen, Rubber Ducky.
-If you ever touch-- -Hey, Max.
-Hi. Can I talk to you for a moment? -Of course. Come in.
Would you like a sandwich?
-Can you grab a plate? -No, I'm not staying.
No, why not?
Then we can be one big, happy family.
Thanks.
I hope you don't mind my coming on your day off.
No, not at all.
Of course not, man. This is great. Having a famous rapper in the house.
I don't know where to start.
Sorry, a rapper with no lyrics.
Said.
Ignore him.
I wanted to apologize.
-For the kiss. -Let's put it down to a misunderstanding.
I'll get him a drink. I don't want him to get a dry mouth.
It is…
It wasn't cool of me.
Yeah. I've already forgotten about it.
Your career is the important thing now, so let's focus on that.
That sounds good.
Sor--
Sorry, Said.
-Oh fuck. -Is that new slang or something?
Are you okay?
Is there shrimp in the sandwich?
Shrimp sauce.
I'm fucking allergic to shellfish.
He needs a hospital.
-Call an ambulance. -Take a sip, man.
Said! Call an ambulance.
-Monica. -Jack, I'm at the hospital.
-The contractions have started. -Are you sure?
I'm not calling you for fun!
-You have to come now. -Now?
Can you hold on? I have an appointment with my attorney.
No, Jack! Now!
I'm coming.
If he doesn't come, we can't proceed with the transfer.
Yes? Perhaps another time. Have a nice day.
Some people never change, especially Jack, apparently.
Maybe he had a valid reason this time.
Always these excuses, that's why you're perfect together.
Like you're a saint. Fuck!
-Are you all right? -My water just broke.
I'll take you. Get in.
Yes. Okay, sat down?
-Yes. -Okay.
Sorry, Max. We didn't know there was shrimp in the sauce.
I look like shit.
If you look quickly, you hardly notice.
I'm singing at the Ziggo Dome tomorrow. I can't even rap like this.
No, sorry. I'll postpone it. Don't worry.
I'm not worried. And you won't be postponing it.
The deal is off the table.
That's my wife.
With another man.
With a fat tongue. He's Handsome Max, sings "Rubber Ducky."
-Jack! -Said?
Cindy's over there.
Yes, with Lisa. I think she's in labor.
Stop joking around.
Aren't you here for Cindy?
No, for Monica. Her water broke.
-Does Cindy know yet? -No.
There's something wrong with you.
I know, but listen. I need your help.
Please.
I need you, Said. Please.
I'm so happy you're here. I don't know what I'd do without you.
No. Where is the doctor?
He just dropped by briefly.
I'll go get him. You can't stay here.
-No, stay here. -I'll go get him. You need his attention.
Said is here. He has two kids. He's a pro. Just ask him if you have questions.
-Jack? -Everything will be fine.
Inhale through your nose and out through your mouth.
Said?
You just need to keep calm.
What are you doing?
Good luck.
Okay, everything's fine down there. Breathe in deeply through your nose.
-And out through your mouth. -Okay.
Where's Jack?
I'm sorry, Lisa. We'll sort out the house, okay?
That's unimportant. You're about to give birth to a wonderful baby.
Are there any fucking doctors in this hospital?
-Sorry I'm so late. -Where were you? I've been calling.
My phone had poor reception.
I'm lucky Lisa was there,
or I'd have given birth on the sidewalk!
Where's Said?
Keep breathing.
Pant through the contractions.
-I want an epidural, now! -Yes, but keep breathing.
-I want it now. -Monica?
Cindy!
-Monica. What a coincidence. Monica! -Oh, how cool.
Said, what are you doing?
She's pregnant, and I'm helping.
-How are things, people? -Jim?
Jim. What are you doing here?
Hey. Lies.
Someone has to bring the babies into the world.
Apparently so.
That's great, but I'm having a baby!
You're right. Sorry.
-Are you the father? -Yes, he's the father.
What?
-Is it true? -Do you think that we… I don't know her.
I'm so done with you.
Jack.
Jack!
I'm the father.
What?
Let me explain, please.
Dirty…
-You dirt-- -I wanted to tell you.
Fuck off!
Yes, go away!
Go away!
Enough! There are two babies that need to be born.
Anyone who isn't Monica or Cindy, get out.
-Nail-biting, huh? -Yeah.
When Souf was born, it took so long that Said fell asleep.
-No. -Yes.
It's taking a long time.
Do you think everything's okay?
You think?
-The delivery went well. Cindy is resting. -And?
It's a beautiful baby girl.
And Monica?
A handsome boy.
You can be proud of Cindy. She did a good job.
I am. But I'm also very proud of you.
Me?
To fight for your relationship, you need to be at home.
Really?
I'll be the perfect husband.
This is your last chance. Don't fuck up.
Dr. Jim.
-That sounds official. -Yeah.
So you're back?
Yes. It was time to grow up.
Why didn't you say anything?
Would it have mattered?
It would have to me.
This could be our life.
What do you mean?
-Do you actually want children? -Depends who with.
Well, I'm going to finish our trip first.
I'd have loved to go with you, but I have a steady job.
Shame.
Maybe when I'm back.
GYNECOLOGY
Love.
Love is complicated.
It needs two people.
It's good to get some distance and make choices for yourself
to discover what makes you happy.
And then you can be taken off guard by new feelings you didn't know existed.
You're brother and sister.
I haven't been a good partner to your mommies…
but I'll be a good father to you both.
Of course it's exciting. Very much so.
But you shouldn't be afraid. You just have to go for it.
What have you got to lose?
Will you marry me?
Yes, of course.
You become happy with someone with whom you never expected it.
I did it. I got a loan from the bank.
Really?
That's fantastic news.
Thanks for your help. I can't wait to celebrate with you.
Then you're in luck.
I'm coming over next week.
That's fantastic!
I haven't been nice to you. Sorry.
You know, Bo can be a pain and bossy, but she's the best at what she does.
Will you give her one more chance?
Or having to admit your mistakes.
You might fall, but you have to get up again.
Whatever love may be, you can't force it.
You have to let it go, and that may be the most difficult thing.
But if it's true love, it will find you by itself.
Wherever you are.
Did you really think I'd let you go on your own?
What about your job?
I immediately took all my leave days.
Subtitle translation by: Adam Dean