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...whose hand you take in marriage.
I do.
Will you love and honour and remain true to Preeya,-
- for better or for worse, until death do you part?
- I do. - Take each other by the hand.
With the blessings of God, I hereby declare you a couple in marriage.
You may kiss your loved one.
Are we done here?
- It's so beautiful. - Yes.
It's a '78 Rolls.
- Is that lipstick? - No, of course not.
It's the W. There's a soccer game tonight.
And that's where you're going? It's just a warm-up match.
We need to warm-up too.
Beautiful service, father.
Hello?
- How do you know the girls? - Oh, we don't know them at all.
She likes to watch.
We celebrate our anniversary by going to weddings.
- But we're not married. - We're engaged.
He promised to marry me 14 years ago.
- Has it been 14 years already? - Yes. Time flies.
I should probably mingle...
You girls need to get going.
They won't get far in that. Hold my coat.
Pop the hood.
Try now.
You're lucky to have a man that fixes things.
Not everything can be fixed.
- There you are. - Did I miss anything?
It looks like we're going to lose.
Don't spoil the excitement!
I have something to tell you.
I'm retiring from the garage.
40 years is a long time.
You don't have to make a big deal out of it
- Your new boss will be Øyvind. - Have you been drinking antifreeze?
- That's a bad idea. - You've lost your mind?
- Never going to repair another car? - I'll never touch another man's nuts.
We can hang out. I'm professionally unemployed.
Well, I'm going far away. Somewhere really, really far.
- To do what? - As little as possible.
Then stay at the garage.
MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE
What's going on? Did you change the locks?
Mia! Can you let me in.
Leave me out of this.
- What did I do? - You've done nothing.
That's what I do best.
I have to study.
- Was it something I said? - Nope, but you're getting warmer.
Listen, Laila, it's...
Marriage is no guarantee for happiness.
It's an old fashioned idea.
I also really want to get married, I just haven't...
...found the right time.
When will you let me back in?
When the time is right.
Gotta have beer.
- Hello, I'd like a room. - Just the one night, then?
Yes, for one person.
We have a vacancy. Do you have a credit card?
Good morning, EdGarage. It's time to get to work.
Slackers.
- Bye now. - Hey...
You forgot your briefcase.
I'm not used to being the boss, you see.
BARELY USED GOLF BALLS 5 KRONER
You could have waited until I was gone.
Hello, Kari.
Are we having cake today?
That's tomorrow, Carsten.
- Where are you going? - Oh, we're just off to...
- Australia. - Australia?
Kangaroos and deadly snakes. I've always wanted to see them.
I'd love to come along, but I'm on welfare.
- I can't leave Europe, or I lose my benefits. -Oh... what a shame.
Freddy, did you hear? Edgar and Kari are going to Australia.
Have you ever been? I'd like to go, but you know my benefits...
Howdy, Kari. Any messages?
That'll be the day.
Petter... Carsten is going to be famous. He's going to be on Rally TV.
- Reality TV, Kai, not rally. - He spells his name with a C now.
All the celebs have nicknames.
Bachelor- Karsten Survivor- Karsten.
To stand out, I thought I'd spell my name with a C.
- There's no "The Farm-Carsten". - I'm not doing The Farm anyway.
My doctor won't let me do any heavy lifting.
How about Welfare Carsten?
We have to discuss our financial situation during lunch break today.
- Lunch break means - break. - It also means lunch.
You're the only one with a steady income.
- Well, with any income at all. - We have to make cutbacks.
- There's nothing more to cut back. - Maybe we should pay to work here?
I can't afford that.
Also, why did you change the locks?
Are locks on sale somewhere? I couldn't get in today.
I want to control who comes and goes.
I noticed you sleeping in your car.
- Laila and I had an argument. - Not the first time you guys argue.
The first she's thrown me out, though.
- From your own house? - It's actually her house.
Why would she do that?
Probably because we have not married yet.
- Get married, then. - No, for God's sake, don't.
I mean, look at me. I'm free as a bird.
I can do whatever I want.
No-one arguing over the remote control.
If I want to watch the same episode four times in a row...
Don't you have anything better to do, Carsten?
No, nothing.
There's a customer.
Øyvind, we have a customer.
Try to look busy.
- Who, me? I don't work here. - Neither do the rest of us, really.
Oh, hi, guys.
- I'm Samantha. - Hello.
Hello, Petter.
Hello.
Okay. Nice to meet you.
I wonder if you can help me. I have a real beauty outside.
She's a bit of a primadonna, and a pain in the arse sometimes.
Can you get her in shape?
Yeah... I can take a titt.
- Pardon? - He means he can fix it.
Oh, thank you, cheers.
- Could I use your ladies' room? - Yes, of course.
Not possible. We don't have a ladies' room, it's just for lads.
What are you talking about? Come with me.
- It's tett, I think. - "Tett"?
It's absolutely not clogged. Come with me.
- Do you think she'll notice? - Not in a million years.
I'll see you soon. Very soon, I hope.
Brilliant.
You need to get parts, Øyvind. That's what bosses do.
- Kjøniksen. - It's Bergh.
I need those parts we ordered.
- My customers are waiting. - You'll get nothing-
- before you've settled your debts!
You can stick those parts up your royal poop chute!
You owe me a fuckton of money! I don't even have water for my pool!
Right, that's settled then.
All good. We're getting the parts.
I set him straight.
Fore!
Idiots!
God damn it.
Freddy, you're a computer guy.
How do I find the forms you need to get married?
- Move over. - Are you getting married, Petter?
- How nice. - I might not, Kai.
At least Mia won't be an orphan.
She's not an orphan just because Laila and I aren't married!
Here, see.
Just what I was afraid of. God damn it.
Have you been married before?
Do you remember Edgar's bachelor party in Lithuania?
Nope, before my time.
The blonde, remember? Cute girl.
Yes, she was a very charming lady.
She wanted to save herself for the wedding night.
That's how it was in the old days.
Your wedding night was a special event.
You know what I mean.
So you married her?
Yup.
I'll have to get a divorce, then.
Separation, all the lawyers. It'll take a full year.
Laila will find someone else by then.
She just has to declare you haven't lived together for two years.
- Who, Laila? - No. Your wife!
Don't call her that!
Listen, about your wife...
Were you never worried she'd show up some day?
She was behind the Iron Curtain. I was sure they'd never let her out.
That was a long time before Laila. Tell her the truth.
That I'm married and kept this secret for twenty years?
It's easier to tell her I have been married instead.
- Why don't you just call her. - Who, Laila?
- No. Your wife! - Stop calling her that!
But she has to sign the divorce papers.
- I lost her number. - Let me find it.
What's her name?
You don't remember her name?
They have very complicated names over there.
What the hell does this mean? "Neskaitmeninis"?
Oh. "Not digitized."
- And? - We can't find out from here.
- Do I have to travel to Lithuania? - If you want your divorce, yes.
Sure, but I...
What will Laila say if the first thing I do after she kicks me out-
- is to go to Lithuania on my own? - Why would she know?
Mia installed an app. We can always see where everyone else is.
Me too?
You need a cell phone for that, Kai.
Why couldn't we all go?
Laila knows us boys go on road trips now and again.
Come on in, Petter. Hang on a moment.
I have a couple of slogans to run by you.
"Trouble with your ride?"
"The EdGarage.... Can hide... Mistakes"
- "hide...the mistakes" - Wait...
Kari, can I have two coffees?
Of course, Øyvind, help yourself.
You know how we go on trips every time there's something to celebrate.
- Celebrate what? - Well, to celebrate...
You want to celebrate me being your new boss?
- That's it. - Your new boss!
- You're right. - Yess!
He's on board.
- That was easy. - Yes.
- What did you tell him? - Not much.
- He thinks we're celebrating him. - So you didn't tell him the truth?
- And Carsten? - No, he doesn't even work here.
The fewer, the better.
Øyvind told me we're going on a trip?
I'll just get a knife.
- How did you order this? - Online.
You composed the text yourself?
Yes, you just tell them what to write.
And you told them to..?
Write "Thanks for everything, Edgar".
- On the cake? - Of course.
I wrote exactly what I wanted on the cake.
"WRITE THANKS FOR EVERYTHING, EDGAR ON THE CAKE"
Good one.
Where is Edgar... Edgar!
Come and have some cake, Edgar.
Hello, boys.
Long time no see. I love jelly men.
We call them jellylads.
- What's the difference? - They're jellier and more laddy.
- You remember Helge? - That's for sure.
He's taken community college, and now he needs experience.
- So I figured he could work here. - He's no goddam car mechanic!
I'm educated in leadership.
Edgar, we have to leave.
He's all yours, boys. Bye now.
You can't do that to us. We're going on a road trip!
- Road trip? Really?
What a great way to get to know one another.
I don't have time for that.
- To get to know you. - That's what the trip is for.
Petter, you're getting married. You need a bachelor party.
- There's no time. - You deserve it.
A bachelor party! Of course! Helge's joining!
- I've never been to a bachelor party! - Well, you are now!
Sit down. I'll make you a smoothie. A jelly-lad-smoothie.
- I'm worried about leaving the shop to Helge. - He'll be fine.
Mia needs the key.
I'm sorry, I have a doctor's note saying I have to sit upfront.
Isn't it dangerous to remove that?
We just left Norway. I don't have to be "sick" anymore.
What are you doing?
I'm trying to come up with new slogans for the EdGarage.
- What rhymes with "fix"? - "Dicks!"
Yes, use that one! "EdGarage can fix your dicks!"
You two share a room.
- And you and Kai. - What about you?
- Do you get a single cabin? - Yes.
We're celebrating me, remember?
Norwegian movie, two words.
This is an unpaid holiday, you know.
We never get paid for our work, so what's the difference?
Why don't you sign up for disability? You'll get paid every month.
- Nothing's wrong with me. - My doctors can take care of that.
Does it ring a bell?
Have another beer, Øyvind.
Hello?
Hello!
Damn.
That was a lame party last night, Petter.
- Good morning. - Morning.
- You had a few last night. - I'm not in the best shape today.
Neither am I.
Upset stomach...
Hello.
- Hi! - Hello.
I just came by to print something, and there's...
- There's a man here. - Oh, that's just Helge!
Right, well, both his arms are in a cast.
Don't worry about that. Let me have a word.
He wants to talk to you.
- This is Helge. - Helge!
- You're so crazy! - Really?
- Don't you remember? - What?
The bachelor party! You did a handstand.
Over the oil pit!
- The ambulance came. - You broke both your arms.
- Both of them? - Yes!
Someone always ends up in a cast at a bachelor party.
Gosh. That's crazy.
It's a shame you couldn't come, but we need someone to be responsible while we're gone.
Trust me, I'm responsible. Count on me.
That's great. Put Mia on again!
- Nothing's broken, right? - No, nothing.
All right. Bye.
Apparently, someone always ends up in a cast after a bachelor party. Did you know?
Pretty cool.
Is this the place you got married?
It must have been. My name must be registered somewhere.
Do you speak English?
- Yes. - We want...
Uh... Book.
Marry.
Book... Marry.
- Now? - Yes, yes.
Okay.
The rings?
What the hell.
Not us marry... I. Here!
With girl from here. Maybe 32 years.
Yeah? Before...wall.
The wall? Yes?
The Iron Curtain... Glasnost!
- What's that name again? - Who?
- The one with Glasnost. - Barclay James Harvest.
Glasnost, this...
President, with the... You know?
Gorbachev.
This should be quick.
What are we looking for again?
- My name! - Right, that's it.
Kai, I found it.
Ihorska Oksana Stanislavina.
No wonder I couldn't remember.
There it is.
- What quota are we allowed to bring to Norway? - 1 bottle liquor, 3 bottles of wine.
Everything above 22 % classifies as hard liquor.
So soft fruit liqueurs are quite risky.
You could end up with a bottle of 30%
- when you are allowed a bottle of 60%.
It's stupid. We should be allowed to add up the percentages.
Instead of 1 bottle of 60 %, we could bring 1-1/2 bottles of 40 % alcohol.
- Yes? - Hello. I just found her.
- Ihorska Oksana Stanislavina. - I'll do some research.
"Place of marriage..."
"Klai-pė-da."
- Did she have that? - What?
What you just said.
- Klaipėda? - Yep. Did you catch it?
It stings like hell when you're pissing.
Or so they say.
A logistics company?
I found a company with her surname. Probably a male name.
- Male? I married a woman. - It could be her dad or brother.
You're the one married to her.
Hello. I need to speak to Ihorskyj.
- Boss to lunch. - It's very important.
I need to speak to him about this today.
Ihorska Oksana Stanislavina.
Mr. Ihorskyj?
- Yes? - You're the brother of-
- Oksana Stan-sili-vana Ihorska?
Oksana Stanislavina Ihorska.
That is my sister.
How should I say this?
He's married with her.
Many years ago I was here. I met your sister,-
- and we married.
But many years after... Not seen.
Completely forgotten.
You know?
Now, I have a new woman.
And she's my...
She is...
- What's "the love of my life", Kai? - Laila.
In English!
"Leyla."
And... I need divorce, please.
That was easier than I thought.
I was so nervous. Almost took a swig of the vodka.
I'm going to call her.
This is Laila. You know the drill.
Hello, it's me.
I have some good news. Now the time is right.
Let's get married.
Well, why don't you call me when you get this?
New neighbours? Hello.
You've been staring at your phone since we got here.
I'm not getting any calls. The boys must have questions.
Sorry to interrupt. I'm the campground manager.
I just wanted to welcome you to Fox Bay.
You're the owner of the EdGarage, right?
I used to be. Now I'm retired.
- So you're not on holiday, then? - No, but I'm not fixing cars either.
- A little fixing, surely? - No.
- I'm sure you fiddle a bit? - No!
Well, well. Check this out.
We have our very own mechanic.
It makes a strange noise when I pull the caravan.
I think I know the problem.
- Edgar. - He's a bit busy.
You have to try this on.
I think I'll have to make it longer.
- Any news from the boys? - Not a word.
- I said to call if they needed help. - They're probably doing fine.
Should I answer it?
I'm responsible, remember?
EdGarage, this is Helge.
This is Samantha Fox. I was wondering about my car.
Yeah, right! Hey, if you're calling from Nigeria or something...
- Nigeria? - Forget about it!
What? Excuse me?
I can smell a scam from a mile away.
We learned about fraud in community college. People get robbed all the time.
Wait in the car.
- I thought we were celebrating me? - Must everything be about you?
Clearly not.
Peter, brother.
Hi.
- My sister signed the paper. - Thank you.
Not now.
It wasn't easy.
So now, I need you to do something for me.
Just bring this trailer to Norway.
What's inside?
It belongs to a Norwegian company. It came here loaded with shrimp.
- Now, they need it back. - Is it empty?
Almost. Maybe a little bit washing fluid.
EdGarasjen...
- The papers seem legit. - Can we have a look?
Is it worth it, Petter?
- Can I delete my message on Laila's phone? - No.
Damn.
Everything okay?
This could be years in prison. No point in getting married then.
Let's get out of here.
Where are you going?
Just to talk to my friend, he's my driver.
Okay.
Did Petter get his papers?
- They want us to take this truck to Norway. - Is that a problem?
It's "washer fluid", Kai.
Oh...
That must've been difficult, but it was the right move.
See you in Norway!
- What did you tell him? - That it was "washer fluid".
Kai doesn't understand air quotes.
- Call him! - Since when does Kai have a cell phone?
Hot truck.
Here they come... running.
Hey, Petter. Laila just sent me a wedding invitation!
- That was fast. - That list was ready 14 years ago.
- Where's Kai? - He just drove by.
What the hell...
- What knucklehead owns this? - I do.
I've told you no one charges while the engine's off!
That doesn't apply to me, I'm the boss.
Shit. When's the next ferry leaving?
In two hours.
Then you can fill us in on the rest.
- So you never told Laila? - No.
You've always lied to her, then?
It's a big difference between lying and not telling the entire truth.
DRIVER'S ED
Hi, mom.
- You're going to have the wedding here? -I thought so.
If we go through with it.
I need to pick up some golf balls. It's a mess out here.
Then I spotted this celebrity.
Have you seen any celebrities?
No, I'm not putting up with this. Does this look like a stadium to you?
Where the hell are you?
Sam, I'm so sorry, I think I booked the wrong place.
- I'll cancel the show, all right? - You'd better.
Kari! Guys, take a break.
How are you? I'm so glad to see you!
This is nice.
Every time I ring the office,-
- they think I'm some guy from Nigeria.
He was really rude.
What's wrong with coming from Nigeria?
Edgar!
- Oh, it's you again. - Listen, I've cancelled the show.
Don't cancel it, I want to sing here.
- Sing there? Sam, it's a shithole. - Just fix it, okay?
Fine, it's your choice.
- So you're a singer? - Yes.
- That's what she's famous for, Edgar. - I thought she was famous for her...
- Well... - Edgar also sings.
- Stop it! - Do you?
No! I'm screwing cars.
- Screwing cars? - But now I'm retarded.
- Retarded? - He's retired.
Oh, retired! All right.
Here, Norwegian Truck Owners Federation.
"Driving hours and breaks... Daily and weekly driving..." Here:
"You must take a 45 minute break after 4 1/2 hours driving."
- Kai doesn't know that! - But the truck does.
- Take a 45 minute break. - That's so cozy!
- Kai! - Well what the hell?
I thought you were Kai!
Kai?
I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to do that. I apologize.
I do a lot of driving on the continent, and with this delicious body I have to defend myself.
- I'm really sorry. - I'm fine.
Rinse with some water. That should do the trick.
- You look a lot like the princess. - I'm so sick and tired of hearing that.
Well, you do.
She's not a fucking truck driver, is she? See ya!
Bloody hell!
Is there any water in the car, or is it all booze?
- The Customs might not pull him over. - All trucks are checked at the border.
How much booze are we talking about?
- 12,000 litres. - Twelve thousand?
Yep.
That's several years in prison.
Shit.
Bloody hell.
Let's hope he gets away with it.
You just wait here.
I need to check this. Thank you.
Good thing you stuck to the quota.
- Shit... Kai. - What about him?
His quota is still here, in the car.
- Well, that's one too many. - Does this belong to Kai?
What are you...?
- You'd better be quick, Carsten. - It's not as easy as it looks!
Hello. Customs check.
What happened to you?
- Been groping, have you? - Groping?
I know pepper spray when I see it.
- She thought I was someone else. - Get out.
- What's this? - I'm nearly there.
- Have you exceeded your quota? - It's almost empty.
You can't drink in front of me.
- Give me the bottle. - It's my bottle!
Police violence!
Assistance... Assistance required.
- We need immediate assistance. - I'm coming.
Are we done already?
- Stand still! - The bottle was empty!
Calm down! Calm down!
- That was really smart, Carsten! - You're a fucking moron!
How stupid can you get? Drinking in front of a customs officer?
You're lucky they let you go with a warning!
Oh, hello!
Isn't that the woman from the pictures on the toilet?
Hi.
I broke both my arms. I was like this all the time, it was crazy!
In the... What's the word, aunt Kari?
- Stag party. But she doesn't seem interested. - Of course she's interested.
- I stood on my hands. - Why did you stand on your hands?
She just doesn't get it.
Why I stand on my hands? Let me show you.
Hi, Samantha!
I'm trying to explain something to Samantha Fox!
- Samantha, listen. - Okay.
- Pretend this is an oil pit. - Okay.
I stood on my hands like this, and I was really crazy.
I was on my hands, you know, in front of Samantha Fox.
- That's pretty cool. - Not everyone has done that.
Thank you so much. And thank you to Hellbillies.
And thank you!
Okay, everyone.
There's somebody in the audience tonight who's got a great voice.
I'd like to invite him on the stage to sing with me tonight.
His name is Edgar, everybody.
- She's nuts! - You can't turn down Samantha Fox.
- You have to, this is what you want. - I'm not going.
Give it up for Edgar, come on.
This is your chance.
Get up there and sing. This is your big dream, Edgar.
Get up there right now!
All the ways that I feel, when you walk my way.
Walk on in, on a winter's day.
Slow is the time, that we spend apart.
The heat is the heat of a heart.
We are stumbling along street lights.
Not always the safest road.
And if you ask me now, I will be completely grazed.
Why do you look the best I know?
Ain't it funny how we made it to this point in life.
Strange how we got here.
When a man and woman, make it man and wife.
And the heat is the heat of the heart.
- What happened to you guys? - You shouldn't have done this, Kai.
My pleasure! Now you'll get your divorce papers.
Come with me.
Smell this.
- Spirits? - Yes.
- So I'm a smuggler, now? - Sure looks like it.
That's booze worth nearly two millions.
This makes me very nervous.
I don't want to go to prison.
You're not going to prison. Let's go sit over here.
You guys have seen enough.
It's safe in here.
Now we're talking!
- Do you have some ID? - Yes.
Let me see.
A library card? Is that your only proof of age?
Do you have a handicap parking permit I could borrow? I'll give you more liquor.
- Well, it looks legit. How much? - Two bottles.
Right, that's 100 kroner per bottle.
BANKRUPTCY SALE CHEAP SUNBEDS
Hello there!
Do you have booze?
- It's for mummy and daddy, I suppose? - Yes!
I can sell this stuff to the lads at the golf club.
It'll be gone in a jiffy.
The question is - can you get more?
Yes, loads.
But I'll need an advance.
I passed the golf course today and saw Kjøniksen.
- What's that outside? - What, the car?
- It's an electric Mustang. - Electric cars never need repair.
And what we do for a living, Øyvind?
How the hell could you afford that car?
- Well, it's... - We'd like to know.
We have to cut the power while we install the chargers.
That's not very cheap.
We are called the Ed-Garage, Øyvind. Not the El-Garage.
It's really not that expensive.
You couldn't even afford a car worth 10,000 kroner.
- I leased it. - You need a cash deposit for that.
Carsten?
I am just copying this.
What's happened to you? You're sunburnt.
Have you ever seen a pale celebrity?
If I'm cast for Paradise Hotel,-
- or one of them dating shows, I might have to be bare chested.
Then the tan's not your biggest problem.
Why are you so sunburnt, Carsten?
Well, a new tanning bed, brand new tubes...
How can you afford a new tanning bed?
What the hell have you done? We're at least 1,000 litres short!
Carsten also took some, don't just blame me!
We helped smuggle it, so we're entitled to our share
- No, it all belongs to Petter. - It's not mine.
I didn't want this, but Kai took it.
I did it for you, Petter.
- So that you'd get your divorce. - So it's your fault!
- Kai didn't know the cargo was booze. - Freddy knew, as well.
Don't look at me. Petter told us to keep quiet about it.
You've lied to Laila all these years, and that's understandable,-
- but now you've started lying to the lads. - I didn't lie, did I?
I just didn't tell you everything. That's not lying.
Concealing the truth is a lie in disguise, Petter!
My mother told me that.
How did you know where the truck was parked, did you follow us?
I reported it as stolen and they checked the lojack.
They told me it was parked here.
I just received a message from customs.
"Att. general manager, EdGarage."
"The cargo control of your shipment wasn't completed."
"Hence the cargo is not cleared, and..."
They're coming to the garage to control the cargo.
I'm going to prison, then?
- You told me I wouldn't. - Kai, you're not going to prison.
I made you a promise. And I'm a man of my word.
Except your promised to marry Laila.
We need 12,000 litres of washer fluid, quick as hell.
Øyvind and Carsten, buy the stuff.
- Us? - You're the ones with the cash.
Get rid of the Mustang and the tanning bed.
The rest of us empty the booze from the truck.
It won't be easy to get the money back for the Mustang.
- The same goes for the tanning bed. - You'll manage.
Unless you'd rather want Kai to go to prison?
- Well, no... - No, we don't want that.
Well, fix it, then! Go on, get out!
- What the hell do I tell Laila? - Maybe tell her the truth?
There's no love without honesty, Petter.
- Your mum again? - Yes.
Hello.
- It's looking very nice, Laila. - Do you like it?
Yes.
- Are you looking forward to it? - Yes, of course.
Yes... Er...
Let's place Carsten next to your mother.
It's a suitable punishment for both.
Is there something you want to tell me?
No.
- Nothing? - No!
Hello, Laila.
I saw your "take three, pay for two" offer.
That's right.
I'll take these three, then, and I'll pay for these two.
- That's not quite how it works. - No?
You grab these three...
And you pay for two of them.
- So that one's for free? - Yes.
Give me 4,000 of that one, then.
Bloody hell.
That was supposed to go straight into the truck.
No...
What the hell, boys?
- You've bought bags! - It was a lot cheaper.
The customs declaration clearly says cans!
- You fucking cheapskates! - Dad!
"Cheapskates" is not a swear word!
You'll have to bring it back, get a refund.
They're closed by now.
- Can't you just pour it into the cans? - Then where do we store the booze?
Hey, when can I have water in the...
"basin."
We need our pay.
No water, no pay.
No pay, no work.
Hey! Don't go!
I'm going to sue you for every Polish Zloty!
Shit!
It sucks like hell...
It sucks really well.
- You have to sign this. - What is this?
A declaration that you have no claims in the house. You've lied to me.
Please sign.
Is Ingeborg your middle name?
Dad...
Ask your mum if I still am.
There you are.
I didn't forget you.
Good stuff.
Kai, how long do you need for a piss?
It's excellent stuff, but...
- Freddy! - Kai!
Kai!
Oh, come on!
- Hello? - They nicked the truck with Kai still inside.
- Where are we going? - There's another car back here.
No, no, no way.
- You've been drinking. - Not that much.
Enough to get you arrested.
I can drive.
No. She needs to practice.
- Mia, where are you going? - Move over, fatso!
STUDENT DRIVER
Get on their side!
There's a guy in the back! Kai is in the back!
He's in the back!
Understand?
He's in the back, in the trailer!
Bloody hell, they have guns!
Slow down... Oh, good God.
Dad, what's going on?
- They're going to kill Kai, for sure. - Who?
Stop asking so many questions! You're worse than your mum!
- Get closer. - All right.
Dad, what are you doing?
Go on, get closer!
Dad! All right, all right!
Faster, come on!
Get closer, come on!
Come on! Closer!
I didn't drink any of it, even though I'm very nervous.
That's good, but we have to leave. I came to get you.
That's nice, but let's wait until they stop.
Have you seen on TV what gangsters do to people who steal their stuff?
I don't watch those shows, they make me nervous.
You should be nervous now!
Kai, trust me now! Stand still!
This won't bloody work.
- Wait. - Petter, I'm scared!
- Hello? - Hi, it's me.
I kind of understood that.
Remember the donut move I taught you?
- I need you to do that now. - Okay.
Remember how? Pull the handbrake. Turn...
- Then full throttle backwards. - All right, I know!
Three, two...
That's off the bucket list, then.
Wow!
Jump! Come on!
You'll have to jump on the count of three!
Right? One, two, three!
Come on, dad!
Hold on tight!
Atta girl!
Hello.
- I remember you. - Howdy.
This is a lot of washer fluid for such a small garage.
- It is washer fluid. - In all of them?
Check them all if you want to, I have no plans this weekend.
There's our driver.
I smell spirits.
You know anything about that?
If I find one single drop of alcohol that's traceable to this cargo-
- then that's all the evidence we need, and you're going to prison.
Holy moley...
Shit!
Get back! Back up!
In line, I said! In line! You too! Back up!
You! In line!
Don't move, okay!
- Any more of you? - No.
- So who's this? - Edgar.
Edgar?
- Edgar as in the Ed-Gar-age? - Yes.
Hello.
No more surprises. Understand?
Edgar...
Howdy!
Thank you.
You can forget about this.
Unless you tell me where it is.
It's...
Sasha, you're coming with me.
Keep an eye on them.
- Have a cigarette, Edgar. - I just had one.
- Do it anyway. - He's trying to cut down, Petter.
He needs to smoke, he's nervous.
- I'm not nervous, what made you think that? - Yes, you are.
You shouldn't encourage people who's trying to get rid of a vice, Petter.
- Have a smoke, Edgar. - That's my decision.
No.
- He needs to smoke. - Okay.
- He says it's all right. Have a smoke now. - Stop nagging!
Call Kjøniksen. Tell him to stay away from the pool.
- Stop! -Thank you for the water in the... basin.
I'll just take a... bath.
I'll pay you after that.
Please don't get in the pool.
Listen, I'll just take a... bath.
And we'll talk... See ya.
I said, freeze!
Oh shit.
Shi-i-it...!
What the hell was that?
Your evidence.
I'll be damned.
That's the craziest shit I've... What the hell!
You survived this one too, Kjøniksen! You are "The man!"
Come on!
There's always so much insanity with you, Petter.
I know everything.
- Mia told me. - Everything?
Yes, how you saved Kai's life.
And the trip to Lithuania, I connected the dots.
I see.
Oksana Stanislavina Ihorska.
You should dry clean that velvet jacket every now and then.
- So you knew? - Yes, but I wanted to hear it from you.
I've been longing for that.
I'm really sorry for all this.
Can you forgive me?
And I've been longing for you to say exactly that.
- We can't get married, you know. - I know.
But at least now I know it's not because of you and I.
Dad, I found these.
- There's your name and some Oksana... - Wait, there it is!
Now the time is right.
How about doing a civil ceremony?
In front of a... "respected official."
I ask you, Petter Fredriksen,-
- do you take Laila Wold... - Ingeborg.
Laila Ingeborg Wold.
Ok. I ask you, Petter Fredriksen,-
- do you take Laila Ingeborg Wold as your wife?
- Hell yeah! - Dad...
- Do you have the ring? - Kai!
Relax, Kai.
You may kiss the bride.
The referee seems to think the kiss has lasted long enough.
They need to continue their celebration elsewhere, we have a match to play.
The bride will take the kick-off,-
- a rather unusual sight here at Fredrikstad Stadium.
What a marvelous dress, everyone,-
- but those shoes are really not suited for playing football.
There's the kick-off, best of luck to both teams.
"JUST MARRIED"
"NO WAR"
"THANKS FOR SAVING THE WORLD"
"THINGS GO BETTER WITH PETTER."
EDGAR IMPRESSES SUPERSTAR SAMANTHA FOX
- Are you sure you know what you're doing? - How hard can it be?
See?
Hello, this is Samantha Fox.
I'm just wondering how things are going with my car.
SEE YA...
Damn. We'll have to frame that one, Øyvind.
Yes...
TO EDGARASJEN. LOVE. SAMANTHA FOX
SCREEN MEDIA Trygve Lie