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[emotional piano music playing]

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Official YIFY movies site:
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[man] <i>Cameras are rolling</i>
<i>anytime that you're ready.</i>

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[Oprah] <i>How you feeling?</i>

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[Viola] <i>I'm nervous.</i>

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[Oprah]<i> Don't be nervous.</i>

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<i>I just saw your little picture</i>
<i>and I wanted to start boohooing.</i>

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[Viola chuckling]

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So here we are on my porch in Maui.

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[sighing]

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[sighing] Maui. Thank you for being here
in our happy place.

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-Oh, thank you for having me.
-Thank you for joining me.

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I know we've known each other
for a number of years.

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We've had other interviews,
but I have to tell you

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when I read this book…

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something happened inside me.

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I… I thought, "Wow!"

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What a wonder.

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What, um… what… what an incredible life

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that you have manifested for yourself,

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that you have used the strength,

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that you have used the power
that I don't even know where you got it.

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When I finished the,
not even the first chapter,

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when I finished the first paragraph,
'cause you know how you open a book…

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Yeah. [laughing]

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…with the first words.

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I was calling everybody I know to say

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we must choose this as a book club

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to have as many people
in the world read it as possible.

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[inspirational music playing]

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What was it about this time

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that you were ready to expose
this level of truth about yourself?

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That is my most frightening question.

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Could I say that, Oprah?

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[Oprah laughing]

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I believed that I was having
a bad existential crisis.

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That's what I believe.

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Um, I wrote the… really wrote the book
during the pandemic.

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But existential crisis,
meaning that crisis of meaning.

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-What's my meaning?
-Uh-huh.

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How do I connect to the world
feeling very disconnected, very isolated.

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And was it the pandemic
that had made you feel that way?

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-I think the pandemic, um, exacerbated it.
-[Oprah] Exacerbated it. Yeah.

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I think before that time,

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what's happened with me
over the last probably 12, 13 years

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is the ascension to a level of fame.

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-I think it's safe to say.
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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[Viola] And the feeling that once I hit it
and once I got on top,

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that somehow my life was going to open up.

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All of a sudden,

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it would be some sort of feeling

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where, uh… that I have arrived,

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that I know the meaning of my life,

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and the heavens were gonna open up,

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and God was gonna sing,

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and that's it.

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[Oprah] <i>Shrewd.</i>

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-Where's my Coke?
-<i>"Ma Rainey's Black Bottom" boys.</i>

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Where's my Coke?
I need a Coke. Hot as it is. Shoot.

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[Oprah] <i>Vulnerable.</i>

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-Throw the priest out then.
-[woman] I am trying to do just that.

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Then what do you want from me?

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[Oprah] <i>Fierce.</i>

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I gave 18 years of my life
to stand in the same spot as you!

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[Oprah] <i>These are just</i>
<i>a few of the portraits</i>

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<i>in Viola Davis' collection</i>

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<i>of astonishing portrayals.</i>

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They don't care nothin' about me.

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[dramatic music playing]

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All they want

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is my voice.

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[Oprah] <i>One win and four nominations</i>

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<i>makes Viola the most celebrated</i>
<i>black actress in Oscar history.</i>

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I became an artist, and thank God I did,

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because we are the only profession

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that celebrates what it means
to live a life.

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[Oprah] <i>Her Emmy-winning turn</i>
<i>as Annalise Keating</i>

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<i>in Shonda Rhimes'</i>
How to Get Away with Murder…

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That's what it costs to change the world.

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[Oprah] <i>…is a role Viola describes as</i>
<i>powerful, liberating, and life-changing.</i>

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So who wants in?

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[Oprah] <i>Viola's first love, the theater,</i>

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<i>has awarded her two Tonys,</i>

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<i>both for plays</i>
<i>by the legendary playwright August Wilson.</i>

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I was born into a certain circumstance
where I couldn't see it with my eyes,

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I couldn't touch it with my hands,

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and so I had to believe it in my heart.

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And I would live the rest of my life
in joy and peace…

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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…and, um, sort of like, uh, Cinderella…

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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[chuckling] …when Prince Charming
comes in, and that didn't happen.

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What happened was excitement at first

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and then the feeling of exhaustion,

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the feeling of really,
um… um, impostors in my life

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in terms of friendships,

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people overstepping their boundaries,

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people feeling like I was a commodity.

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Um, pressure.

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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The pressure of unseen responsibility.

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All I know is it wasn't it.

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Then the question is,
"So, Viola, what is it?"

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[Oprah] Mm.

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[Viola] What is it?

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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What's home to you?

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And how do you get at it?

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And I didn't know the answer to that.

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The only thing I could think to do

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was to go back
to the beginning of my story

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because I think that once you tell
your story over and over again,

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you start to hear it,

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and you start to think,
"Okay. How did I get here?"

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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And what it does,

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what it emphasizes is you go back
to the purest form of Viola.

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[Oprah] Wow, I know--

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And you find out, she helps you define

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what it is that you would call home.

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You go back to this.

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-[Viola] Yeah.
-You go back to this.

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Yeah.

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I mean, that's how I knew
in the first paragraph,

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this is a book that everyone should read.

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Well, I knew, like anything,

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that when you start a book
is it's sort of like a salutation.

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-[Oprah] Yes. Yes.
-And you say, "Hi. How are you?"

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-You know? So…
-[Oprah chuckling]

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-So you did.
-[Viola] I did. I had to introduce me.

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And me is always that little girl,
eight years-old, third grade,

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who would wait
at the back door during dismissal.

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And as soon as that bell rang,

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I just ran over people.

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I was pretty tough.

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I ran over everyone so I can run home

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because I knew the same eight
to nine boys were going to be chasing me,

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calling me Black, ugly nigger,

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and they would pick up anything
they could find on the side of the road,

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bricks, sticks, anything.

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And the vitriol
that would be thrown at me.

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Um, and the level of hatred

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when they were saying
those words of Black, ugly nigger.

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And, um…
and I would run, run, run, run, run.

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-And I would chuck the finger. [chuckling]
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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I would say all the cuss words

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and, um…

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But that really
is the memory that defined me.

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Because what I always say is that
I thought I was really, really slick.

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I was tough,
brought a crocheting needle to school.

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Threatened them at one point,
got them to stop running after me,

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but I always say

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that I never stopped running.

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My feet just stopped moving.

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Wow.

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But as I went through my life,

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as much as I tried
to put on that mask of bravery,

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of confidence,

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of being that sort of boss woman
that people talk about,

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of you don't let anyone
see you, uh, sweat.

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You know, if you wanna climb the ladder,

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you gotta believe in yourself, girl.

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So I put all the language
and the mask of that on,

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but inside, absolutely,
was the damaged little girl

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that I left in Central Falls

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who really, really believed
that she was ugly.

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That she was

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not enough.

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That's what defined me
more than anything else.

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-I wish it were a different story. I do.
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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But it was so powerful,

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and you know with girls--

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Do you wish it now was a different story,
or are you like…

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Maya used to say, "I wouldn't take nothing
from my journey now."

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Are you now at a stage where,

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because of that little girl

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and because of the terrorization
that you experienced on all levels,

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that you recognized
that's why you are who you are?

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Yes. I do.

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I do recognize it.

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Yeah. That without that,
there wouldn't be this.

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Absolutely.

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I… I do recognize it.

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I do believe that your life
is sort of a dying of self.

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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I do. In… in the same way that a phoenix
rises out of the ashes, right?

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And I do believe that it's a part
of your journey and finding yourself

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is going
to these caves of trauma and vitriol

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and all of those things.

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And somehow in the midst of that,
it's like Joseph Campbell says,

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as you go down this path of transformation

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of really trying
to become your ideal self…

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Right.

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…you're gonna meet the part of yourself
that you don't wanna be.

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You're gonna see all of your flaws.

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You're gonna see
all the things that cause you pain.

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[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

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You're not gonna see God,

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you're gonna see you.

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And then you hope that… [chuckling]

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…I think that I have it
in the first paragraph,

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that, you know, when you meet that self
that you no longer wanna be,

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you have two choices at that point.

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You can just stay there

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and be swallowed,

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or you can move on.

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I choose to move on.

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I didn't want to be swallowed,

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and I made that decision
at 28, 29 when I went into therapy

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that I wanted to be different.

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[somber music playing]

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Tell me about your parents,
Dan and May Alice.

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-Not Mary Alice. Not Mary.
-Dan and May Alice. Not Mary Alice.

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I love, love, love, love my parents.

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-[Oprah] My daddy and mama, you call 'em?
-[Viola] Yeah, my mama and daddy. I loved.

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[Oprah] <i>During her childhood,</i>
<i>Viola describes her father, Dan Davis,</i>

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<i>as strict and violent,</i>
<i>but also the first man who loved me.</i>

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<i>Viola writes that her father,</i>
<i>because of his circumstances,</i>

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<i>had a 5th-grade education</i>

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<i>and ran away</i>
<i>from an abusive home at age 15.</i>

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<i>He worked most of his life</i>
<i>as a horse groomer.</i>

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<i>Viola calls her mother, May Alice, loyal,</i>

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<i>a self-sacrificer, and a maternal warrior.</i>

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<i>May Alice was raised</i>
<i>on a plantation in South Carolina</i>

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<i>and gave birth to Viola there.</i>

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<i>Her mother worked in factories</i>
<i>and as a maid,</i>

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<i>and fought for welfare reform</i>
<i>in the 1970s.</i>

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<i>Viola's parents were challenged</i>
<i>by racism, poverty, addiction, and abuse,</i>

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<i>but stayed married for 48 years</i>
<i>until Dan Davis's death at age 70.</i>

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<i>They raised Viola and her five siblings</i>
<i>together in Central Falls, Rhode Island.</i>

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But it was just a life of abject poverty.

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It was a life of deprivation.

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That… that's what it was.
A life of deprivation.

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-[Oprah] Yeah.
-No food…

236
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:27,436
[Viola chuckling]

237
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:30,690
I thought I grew up poor, Viola,
until I read your story.

238
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,567
-[Viola laughing] Yeah. Po'.
-So I will now say, "Hello."

239
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:34,819
[laughing]

240
00:11:34,902 --> 00:11:36,654
-Po'.
-"I bow to po'." Okay?

241
00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:38,698
-[laughing]
-I grew up poor.

242
00:11:38,781 --> 00:11:40,241
I was not po'.

243
00:11:40,324 --> 00:11:41,325
You… you were--

244
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:42,910
And you know what how people say…

245
00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,079
many people say,
"I grew up poor and I didn't know it"?

246
00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:46,414
You all knew it.

247
00:11:46,497 --> 00:11:47,331
Yep. Absolutely.

248
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:49,083
-I say we knew we were po'.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

249
00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:51,544
[Viola] You know,
the plaster coming off the walls,

250
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:54,880
and, um, always being hungry.

251
00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:57,466
-This is not fun--
-[Oprah] In cold Rhode Island.

252
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,260
[Viola] Freezing, plumbing never working.

253
00:11:59,343 --> 00:12:01,053
You know, you had to fill
the bucket of water

254
00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:03,180
to put in the toilet to flush it.

255
00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:04,807
Never having a phone.

256
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:06,475
Never having a phone.

257
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,477
And, um, wetting the bed.

258
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,646
-I was a serious bed-wetter.
-[Oprah] Hmm.

259
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:11,981
Most of the furniture…

260
00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:14,400
We… we got some furniture
on the side of the road.

261
00:12:14,483 --> 00:12:16,819
Most of the furniture from Salvation Army.

262
00:12:17,319 --> 00:12:19,822
-Um…
-You were a bed-wetter until you were 14.

263
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:21,115
[Viola] Fourteen.

264
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:24,869
An apartment, one of our first apartments,

265
00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:26,912
infested with rats.

266
00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:28,706
An infestation.

267
00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:32,877
I mean, at night you had
to put your hands over your ears,

268
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:37,923
so you couldn't hear them
eating the pigeons on the roof at night.

269
00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:41,677
And… and listening to them
eat your toys at night

270
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:43,846
and jump on top of you in the bed.

271
00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:46,432
This is the line that got me.
I'm gonna stop with the jump…

272
00:12:46,515 --> 00:12:50,060
I wanna interrupt the "jump on top of me
in bed," 'cause just the thought of that…

273
00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:52,229
But this is what got me.

274
00:12:52,313 --> 00:12:54,607
And I… I remember so vividly thinking,

275
00:12:54,690 --> 00:12:56,817
I've read a lot of novels,

276
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:59,987
a lot of…
a lot of memoirs, a lot of history.

277
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:03,199
I mean, not even Pecola Breedlove
in <i>The Bluest Eye.</i>

278
00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:04,283
[laughing]

279
00:13:04,366 --> 00:13:05,910
Pecola Breedlove is pretty hard.

280
00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:08,954
[Oprah] Pretty hard,
but not even Pecola Breedlove had--

281
00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:12,875
"There were several fires and the building
soon became infested with rats."

282
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:17,922
"In fact, the rats were so bad,
they ate the faces off my dolls."

283
00:13:18,422 --> 00:13:20,132
"I never, ever went into the kitchen."

284
00:13:20,216 --> 00:13:22,176
"Rats had taken over
the cabinets and the counter."

285
00:13:22,259 --> 00:13:24,470
"The plaster
was constantly falling off the wall,

286
00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:26,972
revealing the wooden boards
holding the house together."

287
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:30,768
I remember growing up in a flat,
you know, on welfare with my mother

288
00:13:30,851 --> 00:13:33,103
too afraid to go into the kitchen at night

289
00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:36,398
'cause they would come out from behind
the refrigerator and the cabinets.

290
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,399
-[Viola] Yes.
-Yes.

291
00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:41,654
Absolutely. And then my sister,
uh, Diane, um… [chuckling]

292
00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:46,534
She was reading stories of rats
eating babies in Harlem in the cribs.

293
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:49,161
So then… then she told it to us,

294
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:55,209
and then we felt like we had to wrap, um,
coats or shirts around our necks at night

295
00:13:55,292 --> 00:13:57,837
to keep the rats from biting our necks.

296
00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,839
And, um… and we would listen to them--

297
00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:01,423
And they would jump on the bed.

298
00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:03,634
They would jump on the bed
and eating the… [scoffing]

299
00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:08,514
'Cause I had a doll that had…
what, um… was made of hard plastic.

300
00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:10,349
-So like porcelain.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

301
00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:12,351
I had one doll like that.

302
00:14:12,434 --> 00:14:17,064
-And to hear the eating of that doll.
-[Oprah sucking teeth]

303
00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:19,149
-[Viola] I mean loud. The crunching.
-[shuddering]

304
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:22,361
And then when I woke up,
the entire face was gone.

305
00:14:22,444 --> 00:14:23,696
[Viola chuckling lightly]

306
00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,739
-Ugh.
-Yeah.

307
00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:28,158
[Oprah] There was a shocking point
in the book,

308
00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:31,120
where you were talking
about the violence in your home.

309
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,746
And there was a seminal moment

310
00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:36,250
when your father
was beating on your mother,

311
00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:38,377
and you tried to stand between them.

312
00:14:38,460 --> 00:14:42,298
And he had taken a glass
and had cut her in the face.

313
00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:43,799
-[Viola] Yeah.
-Describe that moment.

314
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,134
Put us in the story.

315
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:50,055
Yes. It was a particularly violent fight
when my father said,

316
00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:53,642
"I'm gonna…
I'm gonna bust your head open May Alice."

317
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,770
And I had my baby sister in my hand,

318
00:14:56,854 --> 00:14:59,607
and, um, I was so terrified.

319
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,108
It just got really heated,

320
00:15:01,191 --> 00:15:05,112
and he finally… he smashed her head
with the… with the glass.

321
00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:08,741
-[Oprah] Oh.
-And the blood came spurting out.

322
00:15:08,824 --> 00:15:12,578
And by that point, my fear, um…

323
00:15:12,661 --> 00:15:15,623
my fear had… had taken over,

324
00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:19,793
and I just remember screaming, "Stop it!"

325
00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,170
"Just stop!"

326
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,546
"Give me the glass!"

327
00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:27,134
And I can't tell you,
it's sort of like, um…

328
00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:30,304
I don't know,
coming face-to-face with a giant.

329
00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:33,515
Coming face-to-face with your fear.

330
00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:36,226
This is my father.

331
00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:39,855
And, first of all,
you never told Dan Davis what to do.

332
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,190
-[Oprah] Right.
-'Cause…

333
00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:42,441
-Also--
-…I was terrified.

334
00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:44,276
We grew up in the… in the era

335
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,236
where you don't talk back
to your parents anyway.

336
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:47,446
-At all.
-At all.

337
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:50,991
So here I was doing the unnatural thing,

338
00:15:51,075 --> 00:15:54,703
which is telling a parent
to stop doing something

339
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:56,580
that he should not have been doing.

340
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:01,794
And I can't tell you that…
how much it cost me something

341
00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:04,672
to step outside and this--

342
00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:07,424
Everybody,

343
00:16:07,925 --> 00:16:09,969
especially at 14…

344
00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:12,513
[sighing] …you need a parent.

345
00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:13,931
[Oprah] Yes. Yes.

346
00:16:14,014 --> 00:16:17,726
You need a guide.
That person with, sort of, that lamp.

347
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,687
-Right.
-[Viola] That proverbial lamp.

348
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:23,315
That's gonna take you down darkened paths,

349
00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:27,069
and gonna teach you
something about navigating life,

350
00:16:27,152 --> 00:16:30,406
even though, you know,
you're still gonna face some crap in life.

351
00:16:30,489 --> 00:16:31,323
Yeah.

352
00:16:31,407 --> 00:16:34,326
But someone to show you
how to do what they did.

353
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,578
Yeah. You're not supposed
to be showing them.

354
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:38,038
-No. Not at all.
-[Oprah] Yes. Yeah.

355
00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:40,416
And for me, it cost me something

356
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:44,044
to tell a parent to don't do that.

357
00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:46,380
You're gonna kill my mom.

358
00:16:47,589 --> 00:16:48,799
I… I wasn't…

359
00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:52,720
I did not have the emotional maturity,

360
00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:56,223
an… an… an engine to be able to do that.

361
00:16:56,306 --> 00:16:58,892
But I found myself doing it anyway.

362
00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:00,686
But the surprise of that now,

363
00:17:00,769 --> 00:17:03,564
and I think I wrote it in the book,
is that I had it in me.

364
00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:04,481
[Oprah] Yeah.

365
00:17:04,565 --> 00:17:08,485
I had a different sorta strength in me
that maybe I couldn't see at the time…

366
00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:10,404
-That's what you wrote.
-…but was ever-present.

367
00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:13,532
And that moment
actually caused a shift in you

368
00:17:13,615 --> 00:17:15,659
to realize that you did have it in you.

369
00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,202
[Viola] Yeah. I think, uh, it did.

370
00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:20,205
-Like after that, a lot of things changed.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

371
00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:23,542
[Viola] Fourteen was the age I decided
I was gonna be an actress.

372
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:27,629
Fourteen was the age
that I won a major art contest,

373
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:30,507
and I thought I was <i>Slick Willie</i>
for doing that.

374
00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:35,262
Fourteen was the age
that I realized I really wanted out,

375
00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:37,431
and I saw a way out.

376
00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:41,935
A hole had been been blasted
through this cave that I was in.

377
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,854
[Oprah] Yeah. I wanna just say to everyone

378
00:17:43,937 --> 00:17:47,357
that you eventually forgave your father,

379
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:50,527
and became very close with him
towards the end of his life.

380
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:54,490
And that you understood as an adult
that he was dealing with his own demons

381
00:17:54,573 --> 00:17:59,328
and had come from, you know,
such hardship and such tragedy and such--

382
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:01,830
Literally, you know, not being seen

383
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:05,042
and… and victimized himself.

384
00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:08,337
Well, they say that
that's what successful therapy is.

385
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:11,423
That when the day comes when you realize

386
00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:14,843
that your parents did the best they could
with what they had.

387
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:17,179
And In the end you realized
that he loved you.

388
00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:18,889
How did you know, Viola?

389
00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:21,558
Because he told me and he showed me

390
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,228
every single day.

391
00:18:24,311 --> 00:18:25,896
[birds chirping]

392
00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:29,483
Even when he would
be in the car with me driving,

393
00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:31,693
and I drove into a parking lot,

394
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:34,279
he would say,
"Boy, that's so good, daughter."

395
00:18:34,363 --> 00:18:36,990
"You such a great driver.
I love you so much."

396
00:18:37,074 --> 00:18:39,868
He would go to…
He went to all of our plays

397
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:41,328
even if they were in New York.

398
00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:42,913
-Was it hard, though, to forgive?
-Yeah.

399
00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:45,999
Because I remember when I was…
Gayle and I were talking about your book,

400
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:50,629
and she was saying, "I just don't
understand how you can forgive

401
00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:54,508
when a parent has done so much damage."

402
00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:56,677
Was it hard for you to forgive?

403
00:18:57,261 --> 00:18:58,846
-Absolutely it was.
-[Oprah] Mm.

404
00:19:01,014 --> 00:19:03,809
It is, and it still is, I would say.

405
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:04,810
But it's a choice.

406
00:19:04,893 --> 00:19:08,730
You actually use a line in here
that I often use for describing,

407
00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:09,940
you know, forgiveness.

408
00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:12,526
That it's giving up hope
that the past could've been different.

409
00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,862
-[Viola] Yeah.
-And you use that line in here.

410
00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:16,405
So you had reached that point

411
00:19:16,488 --> 00:19:20,159
and recognize
that I can't change what it was.

412
00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:23,537
-[Viola] Absolutely.
-And so I'm just going to march forward.

413
00:19:23,620 --> 00:19:25,831
Yeah. I mean, listen,

414
00:19:25,914 --> 00:19:27,416
uh, y-you know…

415
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:29,585
[sighing]

416
00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:33,088
At the end of the day,
that's what we're all trying to do.

417
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:36,592
We're all trying to do the best we can
with what we've been given.

418
00:19:38,051 --> 00:19:39,303
-And that's it.
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

419
00:19:39,386 --> 00:19:41,930
We just don't have a face
of what that looks like.

420
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,850
I think that sometimes
we watch too much TV.

421
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:45,767
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

422
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:49,813
And we… we want lives
to be played out the same way.

423
00:19:49,897 --> 00:19:53,775
A 41-minute drama is played out
on Thursday night lineup--

424
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:56,695
-And it don't work that way.
-[Viola] And it doesn't work that way.

425
00:19:56,778 --> 00:20:01,617
That everything is…
becomes a, sort of, extension

426
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:06,788
to how much you're willing to accept
the life that God gave you…

427
00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:12,502
and how much bravery you have
to forge ahead

428
00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:15,005
and create the life
that you actually want.

429
00:20:15,088 --> 00:20:16,548
Want. Yes, ma'am.

430
00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:19,384
And it becomes, you know, it's like…

431
00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:23,764
My therapist told me
that life is about two things.

432
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:28,685
Living life for pleasure,
and gratefulness, and joy,

433
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:32,564
but also the understanding
that the downtime is gonna come.

434
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:36,109
-Ugh. Yes.
-And if you can, sort of…

435
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:39,696
be somewhere in the middle
of that and understanding that,

436
00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:41,406
then you could, sort of…

437
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:42,950
It's survivable.

438
00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:47,663
For me, when I was younger,
I thought I was cursed.

439
00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:52,542
I was like, "Okay, um,
you know, no one thinks I'm cute."

440
00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:54,086
"So I don't have that."

441
00:20:54,169 --> 00:20:57,673
"I'm poor. I don't have any money,
any resources." [chuckling]

442
00:20:57,756 --> 00:21:00,217
You know,
I have a lot of violence in the family.

443
00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:02,511
I was like, "Where's my sunlight?"

444
00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:04,680
"Where is it?"

445
00:21:06,139 --> 00:21:09,643
Until once again, this is the power.

446
00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:11,478
I say it to people all the time.

447
00:21:11,561 --> 00:21:14,231
You find people in your life who love you.

448
00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:19,319
And what those people do,
because they love you,

449
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:21,822
and they love all of you, even your flaws,

450
00:21:21,905 --> 00:21:26,868
is they give you permission
to be able to love yourself.

451
00:21:27,369 --> 00:21:28,745
What do I mean by that?

452
00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:32,374
Ron Stetson who said,
"Don't you know, you're beautiful, Viola?"

453
00:21:32,457 --> 00:21:34,751
"I've always seen you as beautiful."

454
00:21:34,835 --> 00:21:35,669
"You do?"

455
00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:38,088
-Okay. I wanna go to that moment.
-Yep.

456
00:21:38,171 --> 00:21:40,674
The first time you show up
at Upward Bound,

457
00:21:40,757 --> 00:21:43,510
this is an organization
that's helping kids from the inner city.

458
00:21:43,593 --> 00:21:47,597
I love this moment
where Ron is talking about,

459
00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:50,183
uh, what it means to be an actor.

460
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:53,103
And every… "Who wants to be an actor?"
He asks the question.

461
00:21:53,186 --> 00:21:55,022
And everybody raises their hand.

462
00:21:55,105 --> 00:21:58,817
And as he continues to talk
about how difficult it is to be an actor…

463
00:21:58,900 --> 00:22:02,529
How many rejections you're gonna have,
how hard you're gonna have to work,

464
00:22:02,612 --> 00:22:04,406
how many times you get turned down.

465
00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:07,159
the hands start going down,
and the hands start going down,

466
00:22:07,242 --> 00:22:08,660
and the hands start going down,

467
00:22:08,744 --> 00:22:13,165
and yours is the last hand remaining.

468
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:18,879
And you say that my dreams
were bigger than my fears.

469
00:22:18,962 --> 00:22:20,088
[Viola] Absolutely.

470
00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:21,798
I needed a dream

471
00:22:23,550 --> 00:22:25,552
like I needed food and water.

472
00:22:25,635 --> 00:22:26,470
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

473
00:22:26,553 --> 00:22:28,764
That dream wasn't just a goal.

474
00:22:29,639 --> 00:22:31,725
That dream was my way out,

475
00:22:31,808 --> 00:22:34,186
was my, sort of, salvation.

476
00:22:34,269 --> 00:22:37,397
You know,
I just wanna interrupt here to say, uh…

477
00:22:38,023 --> 00:22:39,274
You know, I grew up poor.

478
00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:43,528
Having read your story,
I… I don't even understand,

479
00:22:43,612 --> 00:22:47,783
uh, poverty
like the kind you have experienced.

480
00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:49,993
And what I came away from, the book,

481
00:22:51,161 --> 00:22:54,414
believing is that the shame of it,

482
00:22:54,915 --> 00:22:56,833
the shame of it is actually the worst.

483
00:22:56,917 --> 00:22:59,586
And there is a story that you tell here

484
00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:04,508
about a time
where the electricity was off,

485
00:23:04,591 --> 00:23:07,219
there was no gas, the pipes were frozen,

486
00:23:07,302 --> 00:23:08,887
you all had all wet the bed.

487
00:23:08,970 --> 00:23:10,931
Everybody is at home, you can't…

488
00:23:11,014 --> 00:23:12,391
There's nowhere you can go.

489
00:23:12,974 --> 00:23:17,479
And your sister, Diane,
decided she was gonna go to school.

490
00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:20,774
And she got up and she spit her face
and wiped her face and said,

491
00:23:20,857 --> 00:23:22,776
-"I'm going. How do I look?"
-Mm-hmm.

492
00:23:22,859 --> 00:23:27,447
And then your mother decided
you all were gonna leave to go find heat.

493
00:23:27,531 --> 00:23:28,990
Can you describe that moment?

494
00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:32,744
I just picture all of you walking down
the street in your,

495
00:23:32,828 --> 00:23:35,163
you know,
shoes and the holes in your shoes.

496
00:23:35,247 --> 00:23:38,333
-It's Rhode Island. It's snowing and cold.
-Freezing. Mm-hmm.

497
00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:42,921
And the teacher, Mrs. Prosser,
comes out and sees you on the road…

498
00:23:43,004 --> 00:23:46,925
And says, "Mrs. Davis, Mrs. Davis,
why aren't your kids in school?"

499
00:23:47,008 --> 00:23:49,136
"They haven't been in school all week."

500
00:23:49,219 --> 00:23:52,222
And my mom says, "We don't have no heat."

501
00:23:52,305 --> 00:23:56,268
"Um, the pipes are frozen,
so the water don't even come out."

502
00:23:56,351 --> 00:23:59,771
"And we all really cold,
and we don't have no food."

503
00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:03,066
And… and then she, Mrs. Prosser,

504
00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:05,360
who, once again,

505
00:24:06,027 --> 00:24:09,030
you know, one of those people
that gives you permission.

506
00:24:09,114 --> 00:24:09,948
Yeah.

507
00:24:10,031 --> 00:24:11,158
[Viola] Okay. Um…

508
00:24:11,658 --> 00:24:14,244
She had tears in her eyes,

509
00:24:14,327 --> 00:24:16,663
and she was touching our faces,

510
00:24:16,746 --> 00:24:19,207
and she said, "I'm so sorry, Mrs. Davis."

511
00:24:19,291 --> 00:24:20,792
"I'm so, so sorry."

512
00:24:20,876 --> 00:24:24,379
"You let us know
whatever we can do, you know, for you."

513
00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:25,672
"I'm so sorry."

514
00:24:26,756 --> 00:24:27,883
But, you know,

515
00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:31,386
Mrs. Prosser is interesting.

516
00:24:31,470 --> 00:24:35,182
Mrs. Prosser would call me
to her office from time to time

517
00:24:35,265 --> 00:24:37,767
with a bag
full of the most beautiful clothes

518
00:24:37,851 --> 00:24:40,061
that were hand-me-downs from her daughter.

519
00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:43,732
And she would give it to me
because she knew I needed clothes,

520
00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:49,404
which by the way, I was like…
it was like giving me just some jewels

521
00:24:49,488 --> 00:24:50,489
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

522
00:24:50,572 --> 00:24:53,617
When you are in the face of compassion

523
00:24:54,451 --> 00:24:55,494
and empathy…

524
00:24:55,577 --> 00:24:56,411
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

525
00:24:57,329 --> 00:24:59,623
…it's amazing how it kills shame.

526
00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:02,959
Because you're seen.

527
00:25:03,793 --> 00:25:08,632
And you're seen for something
way more valuable than your circumstances.

528
00:25:08,715 --> 00:25:09,549
[Oprah] Yeah.

529
00:25:09,633 --> 00:25:11,510
That's why I bring her up. She saw you.

530
00:25:11,593 --> 00:25:13,094
-She actually saw you.
-Yeah.

531
00:25:13,178 --> 00:25:16,473
I remember when,
I think it was a teacher or a nurse

532
00:25:16,556 --> 00:25:17,432
who had come to…

533
00:25:17,516 --> 00:25:20,602
who had been assigned
to speak to you about hygiene

534
00:25:20,685 --> 00:25:23,813
because you were wetting
the bed all the time.

535
00:25:23,897 --> 00:25:26,566
So you'd come
to school smelling like urine,

536
00:25:26,650 --> 00:25:31,154
and she gave you this lecture about
how to go home and clean up yourself,

537
00:25:31,238 --> 00:25:32,697
and you did.

538
00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:37,244
I think that at the end of the day,
what I was looking for is love.

539
00:25:37,327 --> 00:25:38,245
Yeah.

540
00:25:39,120 --> 00:25:42,207
That sort of radical… power of love.

541
00:25:42,290 --> 00:25:44,668
[Oprah] You have so many
beautiful moments like that in here.

542
00:25:44,751 --> 00:25:46,670
I… Do you know why
I love that moment so much?

543
00:25:46,753 --> 00:25:49,673
Because I-- Teachers were my saviors.

544
00:25:49,756 --> 00:25:52,133
-Absolutely, my saviors.
-[Oprah] Teachers were my saviors.

545
00:25:52,217 --> 00:25:55,512
[Viola] Like I said,
there's power in love. It's radical.

546
00:25:55,595 --> 00:25:58,348
But I can't describe, even in words,

547
00:25:58,431 --> 00:26:01,268
that it was a hard, uh, story to tell

548
00:26:01,351 --> 00:26:05,647
because at the same time, my sister
Dolores was also called to the office.

549
00:26:05,730 --> 00:26:09,276
We were both called
because we smelled really bad that day.

550
00:26:09,359 --> 00:26:10,527
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.
-And--

551
00:26:10,610 --> 00:26:12,779
Could you smell yourself?
Did you know you smelled?

552
00:26:12,862 --> 00:26:14,239
-Yeah.
-[Oprah] You did?

553
00:26:14,948 --> 00:26:18,034
-I didn't know what to do about it.
-Yeah.

554
00:26:18,118 --> 00:26:21,079
You know, I think that people
just automatically assume,

555
00:26:21,162 --> 00:26:22,455
well, you just clean yourself.

556
00:26:22,539 --> 00:26:25,250
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.
-Well, not if anyone doesn't show you.

557
00:26:25,333 --> 00:26:27,544
Once again,
going back to the Stevie Wonder song.

558
00:26:27,627 --> 00:26:30,297
"Show me how to do what you do.
Show me how to do it."

559
00:26:30,380 --> 00:26:31,756
-No one showed me.
-[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

560
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,009
And we didn't have any hot water.

561
00:26:34,634 --> 00:26:36,595
A lot of times we didn't have any soap.

562
00:26:36,678 --> 00:26:40,140
A lot of times
we didn't even have any clean clothes.

563
00:26:40,223 --> 00:26:44,019
You know, we'd wash the clothes
by hand the night before,

564
00:26:44,102 --> 00:26:47,647
hang them up to dry,
and try not to hang them outside.

565
00:26:47,731 --> 00:26:50,525
Because we'd hang them outside sometimes,
but it's cold.

566
00:26:50,609 --> 00:26:52,736
-So, the next day, they're icicles.
-They'd freeze. Yes.

567
00:26:52,819 --> 00:26:54,404
So you hang them out to dry,

568
00:26:54,487 --> 00:26:56,823
and the next day,
if they're not dry, they're wet.

569
00:26:56,906 --> 00:26:59,784
But then if you're not clean,
you're putting on wet clothes…

570
00:26:59,868 --> 00:27:01,119
It's all the…

571
00:27:01,202 --> 00:27:05,373
People don't realize
that if no one shows you,

572
00:27:05,457 --> 00:27:08,001
then you have
to figure it out on your own.

573
00:27:09,294 --> 00:27:13,548
And I didn't have the tools
to figure it… figure it out on my own.

574
00:27:13,632 --> 00:27:19,387
And then I was ashamed that I didn't have
the tools to figure it out on my own.

575
00:27:19,929 --> 00:27:23,933
So then all I had,
all I could do was swim in the shame.

576
00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:26,102
Yes. I love… There's a line that you use.

577
00:27:26,186 --> 00:27:28,480
I think it's on page 89
where you talk about…

578
00:27:28,563 --> 00:27:31,733
You're… People are always saying,
"Just do better. Do better."

579
00:27:31,816 --> 00:27:34,611
"Try harder.
Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."

580
00:27:34,694 --> 00:27:37,280
But hard to pull yourself up
when you don't have a boot.

581
00:27:37,864 --> 00:27:38,907
Absolutely.

582
00:27:38,990 --> 00:27:39,824
Absolutely.

583
00:27:39,908 --> 00:27:45,205
You know it's… it's… it's the vision
of what you want in your life.

584
00:27:45,288 --> 00:27:48,333
Right? The… Or the discovery
of what you wanna do.

585
00:27:48,416 --> 00:27:51,044
It's a vision of where you wanna end up,

586
00:27:51,127 --> 00:27:55,298
but there's this whole part
in between of how to get there.

587
00:27:55,382 --> 00:27:56,383
[Oprah] Hmm.

588
00:27:56,466 --> 00:28:00,720
That whole journey of someone
who gives you that rope,

589
00:28:00,804 --> 00:28:03,014
that… that… that sword,

590
00:28:03,515 --> 00:28:04,974
that, you know,

591
00:28:05,642 --> 00:28:08,019
that knife, whatever.

592
00:28:08,103 --> 00:28:11,731
That whole in between
is what you have to figure out.

593
00:28:11,815 --> 00:28:14,734
And that was the thing
that became rickety.

594
00:28:14,818 --> 00:28:18,947
That I wanted someone
to help me figure it out.

595
00:28:19,030 --> 00:28:19,864
[Oprah] Yeah.

596
00:28:20,990 --> 00:28:22,784
And In the midst of all this,

597
00:28:22,867 --> 00:28:24,703
there's also sexual abuse
going on in the home.

598
00:28:24,786 --> 00:28:26,329
There's nothing that didn't happen.

599
00:28:26,413 --> 00:28:28,790
-You had sexual abuse.
-[Viola] Yeah.

600
00:28:28,873 --> 00:28:30,875
Violence going on in the home.

601
00:28:30,959 --> 00:28:36,172
You have the tyranny
of colorism, sexism, racism.

602
00:28:36,256 --> 00:28:41,010
I was so struck by the fact
that your mother's story

603
00:28:41,094 --> 00:28:47,100
that she only went to the 8th grade
because she was beaten in school

604
00:28:47,183 --> 00:28:50,645
by the light-skinned teacher
for not being light enough.

605
00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:51,563
Mm-hmm.

606
00:28:51,646 --> 00:28:54,607
And that the same thing happened
to your sister Diane

607
00:28:54,691 --> 00:28:56,192
when she was in South Carolina.

608
00:28:56,276 --> 00:28:59,529
Beaten by the teachers
for not being light enough.

609
00:28:59,612 --> 00:29:02,741
Beaten by Black teachers
in a segregated school

610
00:29:02,824 --> 00:29:04,576
for not being light enough.

611
00:29:04,659 --> 00:29:05,702
Absolutely.

612
00:29:06,911 --> 00:29:08,288
You know, I think that…

613
00:29:08,788 --> 00:29:09,622
[sighing]

614
00:29:11,499 --> 00:29:15,587
…failure and hardship
is an interesting learning tool.

615
00:29:17,130 --> 00:29:21,092
Because I think that once you hit bottom,

616
00:29:22,135 --> 00:29:25,263
then you either stay there
or you figure out how to rise up.

617
00:29:25,346 --> 00:29:26,181
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

618
00:29:26,723 --> 00:29:31,060
And I think
that that's what happened with all of us.

619
00:29:31,144 --> 00:29:33,646
Even my sister Diane back in the day,

620
00:29:33,730 --> 00:29:37,484
and my mom,
that you either survive or you don't.

621
00:29:38,276 --> 00:29:40,987
[Oprah] The sisters,
you all were your own little army.

622
00:29:41,070 --> 00:29:41,905
[Viola] Mm-hmm.

623
00:29:41,988 --> 00:29:43,990
[Oprah] Where would you be
without your sisters?

624
00:29:44,073 --> 00:29:46,868
-[Viola] Yeah. [laughing]
-You said you all were your own platoon.

625
00:29:46,951 --> 00:29:48,828
-Yes. Absolutely.
-[Oprah] Yeah. Yeah.

626
00:29:48,912 --> 00:29:51,331
[Oprah] And on page 75,
you write this about your sisters.

627
00:29:51,414 --> 00:29:53,708
You say, "Some battles we won,

628
00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:56,795
survived together
and emerged with laughter and perspective,

629
00:29:56,878 --> 00:29:59,506
and some brutal ones,
sexual abuse, we lost."

630
00:29:59,589 --> 00:30:03,009
"Sexual abuse back in the day
didn't even have a name."

631
00:30:03,092 --> 00:30:04,177
No, it didn't.

632
00:30:04,260 --> 00:30:07,222
It's just, you know,
that dirty old man on the street,

633
00:30:07,305 --> 00:30:11,100
you know, who wanted to give you
a quarter, but then wanted a kiss.

634
00:30:11,184 --> 00:30:12,018
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

635
00:30:12,101 --> 00:30:15,104
No one knows what boundaries are
with little girls,

636
00:30:15,188 --> 00:30:16,981
especially back in the day.

637
00:30:17,065 --> 00:30:20,193
So, if a… a guy said,
you know, "Give me a kiss."

638
00:30:20,276 --> 00:30:23,363
Someone said, "Oh, give him a kiss.
It's not a big deal."

639
00:30:23,446 --> 00:30:26,282
Or someone leaves you
with a male babysitter

640
00:30:26,366 --> 00:30:29,285
because that male babysitter
is a friend of the family.

641
00:30:29,369 --> 00:30:32,247
And then your parents go out
and they leave you alone.

642
00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:33,957
They don't think anything of it.

643
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,292
You know, we didn't have social media
back in the day

644
00:30:36,376 --> 00:30:41,172
where people would talk about statistics
of how many girls are molested--

645
00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:44,884
That's right. Wasn't even…
wasn't even… wasn't even a word for it.

646
00:30:44,968 --> 00:30:47,303
But I think what you've done in this book

647
00:30:47,387 --> 00:30:51,391
is revealed a part of yourself
that is really a part of us all.

648
00:30:51,474 --> 00:30:52,308
Yeah.

649
00:30:52,392 --> 00:30:54,686
[Oprah] Every person
who's struggling for self-love,

650
00:30:54,769 --> 00:30:59,023
and I just so appreciate
you being honest enough to be able to say

651
00:30:59,107 --> 00:31:01,484
that when you were first on stage,

652
00:31:01,568 --> 00:31:05,029
and you would get
the adulation and the applause,

653
00:31:05,113 --> 00:31:09,826
and the people saying, "I'm so moved
by what you've done and what you acted,"

654
00:31:09,909 --> 00:31:10,952
that you…

655
00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:14,455
At first, you are satiated by that,
for a moment,

656
00:31:14,539 --> 00:31:19,252
but then you come to recognize that that
really has nothing to do with self-love,

657
00:31:19,335 --> 00:31:23,798
and actually begins to create
this feeling of being an impostor.

658
00:31:23,882 --> 00:31:24,841
Absolutely.

659
00:31:25,633 --> 00:31:29,262
You feel, first of all, you feel
an impostor in your work. [chuckling]

660
00:31:29,345 --> 00:31:31,556
I didn't wanna feel
the impostor in my life.

661
00:31:31,639 --> 00:31:35,101
I would think
this book is my gift to others.

662
00:31:35,184 --> 00:31:36,019
[Oprah] Yes.

663
00:31:36,102 --> 00:31:39,105
I felt like it was, uh… it was a sort of…

664
00:31:39,188 --> 00:31:41,024
It was a gift to yourself.

665
00:31:41,107 --> 00:31:44,527
It was a releasing for yourself,
but… and in that releasing,

666
00:31:44,611 --> 00:31:47,572
all the other people
are gonna be so served by this story.

667
00:31:47,655 --> 00:31:49,032
-I hope so.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

668
00:31:49,115 --> 00:31:51,492
It's my way of owning my story.

669
00:31:51,576 --> 00:31:55,538
It's my way of not, sort of,
sweeping it under the rug

670
00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:58,875
and creating this other image of me

671
00:31:58,958 --> 00:32:02,045
because I feel like
in creating this different image,

672
00:32:02,128 --> 00:32:06,382
it's proving to those boys
that I actually was all those things…

673
00:32:06,883 --> 00:32:08,301
[Oprah] That they tried to call you.

674
00:32:08,384 --> 00:32:10,011
-[Viola] Absolutely.
-That they called you.

675
00:32:10,094 --> 00:32:11,596
Or tried to make you believe.

676
00:32:11,679 --> 00:32:13,556
And that you believed
for such a long time.

677
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,266
Yes. Yeah.

678
00:32:15,350 --> 00:32:18,770
I would have to say
what I came away from <i>Finding Me,</i>

679
00:32:19,437 --> 00:32:23,358
thinking I dis-- discovered anew about you

680
00:32:23,441 --> 00:32:27,654
is that you have this indomitable courage.

681
00:32:27,737 --> 00:32:28,613
It's courage.

682
00:32:28,696 --> 00:32:30,657
You know Maya used to always say,

683
00:32:30,740 --> 00:32:33,368
"Courage is the most important
of the virtues

684
00:32:33,451 --> 00:32:36,037
because without it,
you cannot practice anything."

685
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:41,125
And in here, <i>Finding Me,</i>
you talk about courage is the real cure.

686
00:32:41,209 --> 00:32:44,128
So there was a…
there was a point in your life

687
00:32:44,212 --> 00:32:48,091
where you had decided
that you were just gonna be a teacher,

688
00:32:48,174 --> 00:32:51,135
and you were not gonna act,
even though you loved it… you loved it.

689
00:32:51,219 --> 00:32:55,014
And share with everyone
how you started to feel depressed.

690
00:32:55,098 --> 00:32:57,141
There was a sadness that came over you

691
00:32:57,225 --> 00:33:00,979
because you were not doing
the thing that you knew you needed to do.

692
00:33:01,062 --> 00:33:04,482
Yeah, when I went to college,
when I first entered college,

693
00:33:04,565 --> 00:33:06,567
um, I said I can't major in theater.

694
00:33:06,651 --> 00:33:09,445
That is not a profession
that can pay the bills.

695
00:33:09,529 --> 00:33:11,406
And I really needed to pay my bills.

696
00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:13,700
-[Oprah] Yeah.
-'Cause I did not wanna be on welfare.

697
00:33:13,783 --> 00:33:17,996
I wanted to not be what my…
what I felt my parents were.

698
00:33:18,079 --> 00:33:18,913
Yeah.

699
00:33:18,997 --> 00:33:21,082
[Viola] And so then
I fell into a great depression

700
00:33:21,165 --> 00:33:23,668
in denying that creative spirit in me

701
00:33:23,751 --> 00:33:26,004
until I think my sister Dolores said,

702
00:33:26,087 --> 00:33:28,631
"Why aren't you majoring
in theater, Viola?"

703
00:33:29,841 --> 00:33:33,302
And I said, "Because I can't
make any money doing that, Dolores."

704
00:33:33,386 --> 00:33:36,639
She said, "But that's what you love to do.
That's who you are."

705
00:33:37,181 --> 00:33:39,183
And, you know,
what you begin to understand

706
00:33:39,267 --> 00:33:42,020
is that whole Anne Lamott quote, which is,

707
00:33:42,729 --> 00:33:46,566
"All courage is,
is fear said with prayers."

708
00:33:46,649 --> 00:33:47,567
[Oprah] Mm.

709
00:33:47,650 --> 00:33:48,484
[Viola] That…

710
00:33:48,985 --> 00:33:52,238
I understood that the fear
was not gonna go away.

711
00:33:52,321 --> 00:33:53,531
[inspirational music playing]

712
00:33:53,614 --> 00:33:56,200
That, "Viola, there is a huge chance

713
00:33:56,284 --> 00:34:00,538
that maybe it's not gonna land,
and it's not gonna work,

714
00:34:01,497 --> 00:34:03,791
but dangonnit, it's worth the try."

715
00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:05,209
Dangonnit.

716
00:34:05,293 --> 00:34:06,669
-[Viola] You know?
-Yes.

717
00:34:06,753 --> 00:34:07,587
Yeah.

718
00:34:08,087 --> 00:34:11,299
[Oprah] <i>Viola electrified the stages</i>
<i>of Rhode Island College,</i>

719
00:34:11,382 --> 00:34:14,385
<i>graduating in 1988</i>
<i>with a degree in theater.</i>

720
00:34:14,969 --> 00:34:19,098
<i>Because she could only afford just one</i>
<i>application fee for graduate school,</i>

721
00:34:19,182 --> 00:34:22,268
<i>she auditioned for one</i>
<i>of the most prestigious programs,</i>

722
00:34:22,351 --> 00:34:24,812
<i>Juilliard, and got in.</i>

723
00:34:25,688 --> 00:34:28,149
<i>Three years after graduating</i>
<i>from Juilliard,</i>

724
00:34:28,232 --> 00:34:32,945
<i>Viola made her Broadway debut</i>
<i>in August Wilson's, </i>Seven Guitars.

725
00:34:33,029 --> 00:34:36,908
<i>Her rave reviews put her</i>
<i>on the next path to television and movies.</i>

726
00:34:36,991 --> 00:34:38,242
What's your name?

727
00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:42,205
It's got nothing to do with me,
but that offer, he was a part of it.

728
00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:46,084
[Oprah] When did you realize, Viola,

729
00:34:46,167 --> 00:34:52,924
that being on stage or acting
was the path to healing for you?

730
00:34:55,009 --> 00:34:57,011
Oh, the minute I started doing it.

731
00:34:58,930 --> 00:35:02,934
The minute I did the first skit
when I was nine years old, I realized

732
00:35:04,227 --> 00:35:06,562
it had the ability to heal me.

733
00:35:06,646 --> 00:35:09,273
All the things
I couldn't express in my life,

734
00:35:09,357 --> 00:35:12,527
if I expressed it
on stage would be celebrated.

735
00:35:12,610 --> 00:35:13,444
[Oprah] Mm.

736
00:35:14,112 --> 00:35:16,781
[Viola] You play a character
who's a runaway

737
00:35:16,864 --> 00:35:20,451
who has trauma from parents,

738
00:35:20,535 --> 00:35:25,957
and you expressed all of that onstage
in a way that was honest and truthful,

739
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:28,626
then the audience celebrates it.

740
00:35:28,709 --> 00:35:32,130
They celebrate seeing that level
of humanity,

741
00:35:32,213 --> 00:35:36,634
and you can't express that
in your real life.

742
00:35:36,717 --> 00:35:39,595
Oh, you can, but you risk being shamed.

743
00:35:39,679 --> 00:35:40,638
[Viola chuckling]

744
00:35:40,721 --> 00:35:43,474
So from the moment I started doing skits,

745
00:35:43,558 --> 00:35:46,477
I felt like
whatever I can't express in my life,

746
00:35:46,561 --> 00:35:48,187
I could do it in a character.

747
00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:49,522
[Oprah] Mm.

748
00:35:50,481 --> 00:35:55,194
I wanna just rip open
what it means to be a human being

749
00:35:55,278 --> 00:36:00,408
and show it to you in all its ugliness,
beauty, contradictions, and complexity.

750
00:36:01,701 --> 00:36:05,580
In that way,
I think that's what saved my life.

751
00:36:05,663 --> 00:36:07,206
That's what healed me.

752
00:36:07,290 --> 00:36:13,754
It was my conduit of being able to take
all the trauma, all the spew, everything,

753
00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:17,550
and feed it
through that vacuum of these characters

754
00:36:18,050 --> 00:36:19,218
and give it to you.

755
00:36:20,887 --> 00:36:22,430
Re-- recreated.

756
00:36:22,513 --> 00:36:25,516
'Cause one of the things
that you say is that,

757
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:26,934
"I'm not here…"

758
00:36:27,018 --> 00:36:29,437
"I-I'm not here to create some fantasy."

759
00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:33,608
Your job, as you see it as an actor,
is to show us to ourselves.

760
00:36:33,691 --> 00:36:35,359
-Absolutely.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

761
00:36:35,443 --> 00:36:36,444
Absolutely.

762
00:36:36,527 --> 00:36:39,447
-And not the politically correct self.
-[Oprah] Yeah.

763
00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:42,033
Don’t you think it ever crossed my mind
to want to know other men?

764
00:36:42,116 --> 00:36:46,287
That I wanted to lay up somewhere
and forget about my responsibilities?

765
00:36:46,370 --> 00:36:49,749
That I wanted someone
to make me laugh so I can feel good?

766
00:36:49,832 --> 00:36:52,418
[Viola] Those stories
that nobody wants to tell.

767
00:36:52,501 --> 00:36:53,920
But I held on to you, Troy.

768
00:36:54,462 --> 00:36:58,758
I took all my feelings,
my wants and needs and dreams,

769
00:36:58,841 --> 00:37:00,843
and I buried them inside you…

770
00:37:00,927 --> 00:37:01,761
[Viola] You know--

771
00:37:01,844 --> 00:37:05,139
[Oprah] That's why you let snot run
with Rose, when the snot was running.

772
00:37:05,223 --> 00:37:06,140
[both laughing]

773
00:37:06,224 --> 00:37:09,602
[Oprah] That's why when the snot
was running in <i>Fences </i>you just say,

774
00:37:09,685 --> 00:37:12,855
"That's what's happening with Rose.
I'm gonna let it roll." Right?

775
00:37:12,939 --> 00:37:17,443
Absolutely. I think everybody
moves through life fighting to be seen.

776
00:37:17,944 --> 00:37:21,072
Sometimes even by themselves,
to themselves.

777
00:37:21,948 --> 00:37:25,952
And the bravery for an actor
is to look at a moment.

778
00:37:26,035 --> 00:37:28,746
I did it with <i>How To Get Away With Murder.</i>

779
00:37:28,829 --> 00:37:30,456
I said, "Listen,

780
00:37:30,539 --> 00:37:32,041
I'm getting ready for bed."

781
00:37:32,124 --> 00:37:34,252
"My husband
is cheating on me." [chuckling]

782
00:37:34,335 --> 00:37:36,712
-I mean, it's a melodrama. Right?
-[Oprah] Yes.

783
00:37:36,796 --> 00:37:39,006
So I can make a choice in this moment

784
00:37:39,715 --> 00:37:41,217
of doing the TV thing,

785
00:37:41,300 --> 00:37:47,556
which is to keep my beautiful hair weave
and wig and my makeup

786
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:50,851
and just turn around
and give him that one-line zinger,

787
00:37:51,394 --> 00:37:54,981
or I can inject something in here.

788
00:37:55,064 --> 00:37:59,652
Something that every woman
who's sitting there on their couch

789
00:37:59,735 --> 00:38:04,490
with the retainers,
and their rollers, and no makeup--

790
00:38:04,573 --> 00:38:06,867
-In our socks. Yeah.
-And, you know, in socks…

791
00:38:06,951 --> 00:38:12,123
can look at this and somehow feel
some level of connection to this story.

792
00:38:12,915 --> 00:38:14,542
So let me take the wig off.

793
00:38:14,625 --> 00:38:15,835
[emotional music playing]

794
00:38:15,918 --> 00:38:18,754
[Viola] Let me take the makeup off
because in doing that,

795
00:38:18,838 --> 00:38:22,508
what I'm presenting you with
is not the character of Annalise,

796
00:38:22,591 --> 00:38:24,302
but the woman that is Annalise.

797
00:38:24,385 --> 00:38:25,219
[Oprah] Wow.

798
00:38:25,303 --> 00:38:29,473
And I read that it was you who insisted
that that happen in that scene.

799
00:38:29,557 --> 00:38:31,350
-[Viola] Yes, it was.
-[Oprah] Yes.

800
00:38:31,434 --> 00:38:36,230
What you wrote is, "Annalise Keating
released in me the obstacles blocking me

801
00:38:36,314 --> 00:38:40,192
from realizing my worth
and power as a woman."

802
00:38:40,276 --> 00:38:44,071
"If I were to mark
the first time I fully used my voice,

803
00:38:44,155 --> 00:38:46,198
it was in <i>How to Get Away with Murder."</i>

804
00:38:46,282 --> 00:38:48,200
"That role liberated me."

805
00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:52,455
What was it about Annalise
that helped you step into your full power?

806
00:38:52,538 --> 00:38:56,375
Because she was all the things
that people said, not only I wasn't,

807
00:38:56,459 --> 00:38:58,461
but people who look like me weren't.

808
00:38:58,961 --> 00:39:00,046
You're not sexual.

809
00:39:00,129 --> 00:39:02,173
No one's gonna find you attractive.

810
00:39:02,256 --> 00:39:03,883
You're probably not having sex

811
00:39:03,966 --> 00:39:06,594
'cause who would wanna…
who would, um, desire you?

812
00:39:06,677 --> 00:39:09,221
This was happening…
this was nine years ago.

813
00:39:09,305 --> 00:39:11,432
So people were saying that nine years ago?

814
00:39:11,515 --> 00:39:13,934
Absolutely. I always… [laughing]

815
00:39:14,685 --> 00:39:15,770
Yes, they were.

816
00:39:16,479 --> 00:39:17,355
And…

817
00:39:18,105 --> 00:39:22,693
And that's why it was liberating
because it absolutely is not true.

818
00:39:22,777 --> 00:39:23,819
Listen,

819
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,280
just a fantasy of mine,

820
00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:30,451
that there is any number of people
who are sitting at home

821
00:39:30,534 --> 00:39:33,621
waiting to be a part of the story.

822
00:39:33,704 --> 00:39:35,373
To see themselves.

823
00:39:35,456 --> 00:39:38,084
To feel some level of validation.

824
00:39:38,167 --> 00:39:43,214
And I felt that Annalise was a perfect way
for me to be able to do that.

825
00:39:43,297 --> 00:39:47,259
Okay. I wanna get to… to Julius
because he's such a…

826
00:39:47,343 --> 00:39:48,803
has been such a…

827
00:39:48,886 --> 00:39:50,846
He changed your whole life.
Everything changed.

828
00:39:50,930 --> 00:39:53,724
So let's get to the story where you…

829
00:39:53,808 --> 00:39:55,810
You were talking to a friend and you said,

830
00:39:55,893 --> 00:39:59,814
"I can't believe I…
I keep running into all these assholes."

831
00:39:59,897 --> 00:40:03,234
And she said, "Well, maybe
you should look at yourself."

832
00:40:03,317 --> 00:40:04,443
-[Viola] Yeah.
-Right?

833
00:40:04,527 --> 00:40:09,698
And then you had a friend who told you
to go home and pray for who you wanted.

834
00:40:09,782 --> 00:40:11,659
-[Viola] Mm-hmm.
-The kind of man you wanted.

835
00:40:11,742 --> 00:40:15,079
And you actually got on your knees
and you asked God for…

836
00:40:15,621 --> 00:40:17,915
A big Black man. I said because he said,

837
00:40:17,998 --> 00:40:19,375
"Viola, even…

838
00:40:19,458 --> 00:40:20,292
[chuckling]

839
00:40:20,376 --> 00:40:23,421
He said, "Even the vacuous stuff.
Just put it all in there."

840
00:40:23,504 --> 00:40:24,964
"Looks, everything."

841
00:40:25,047 --> 00:40:28,384
I said, "Really? With God?
I got to tell him that."

842
00:40:28,467 --> 00:40:31,095
He's like, "Yes.
You gotta put it all out there."

843
00:40:31,178 --> 00:40:33,264
He was like, "Be careful."

844
00:40:33,347 --> 00:40:35,349
And I went I got on my knees,

845
00:40:36,350 --> 00:40:37,184
and I did.

846
00:40:37,268 --> 00:40:40,312
I said,
"I want a big Black man from the south

847
00:40:40,396 --> 00:40:43,065
who's probably been married before,
has kids,

848
00:40:43,149 --> 00:40:45,734
'cause I don't want any pressure
in that department.

849
00:40:45,818 --> 00:40:49,530
Someone who's maybe been an actor
who understands the artistic community.

850
00:40:49,613 --> 00:40:52,450
Someone who goes to church and loves God.

851
00:40:52,533 --> 00:40:55,369
I said, "If you give me that,
I'll start going to church, God."

852
00:40:55,453 --> 00:40:56,537
"I really will."

853
00:40:56,620 --> 00:40:59,915
"I… I'm… I'm committed to it."

854
00:40:59,999 --> 00:41:03,961
[laughs] And then I signed off
just like writing a letter.

855
00:41:04,044 --> 00:41:08,841
And three and a half weeks later,
I met Julius from Texas.

856
00:41:08,924 --> 00:41:12,178
Ex-football player, 'cause actually
that's one of the things I put on--

857
00:41:12,261 --> 00:41:15,389
-[Oprah] You asked for a football player.
-[Viola] A football player. Athlete.

858
00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,892
Ex- football player, been married.

859
00:41:17,975 --> 00:41:19,810
Raised his children on his own.

860
00:41:19,894 --> 00:41:20,853
Was an actor.

861
00:41:21,687 --> 00:41:23,189
Invited me to church.

862
00:41:25,691 --> 00:41:26,734
And, um,

863
00:41:27,902 --> 00:41:29,445
I thought to myself,

864
00:41:30,279 --> 00:41:31,197
"Whoa."

865
00:41:32,615 --> 00:41:36,160
Did you know immediately
that he is what you'd prayed for?

866
00:41:36,243 --> 00:41:37,995
-Yeah!
-[Oprah] You did?

867
00:41:39,872 --> 00:41:41,916
[Viola] I went home. I was amazed.

868
00:41:41,999 --> 00:41:43,792
I started calling.

869
00:41:43,876 --> 00:41:46,212
Especially… My friend Patrice, especially.

870
00:41:46,295 --> 00:41:47,713
I said, "Patrice."

871
00:41:47,796 --> 00:41:49,131
"I met a man."

872
00:41:49,215 --> 00:41:50,257
[Oprah laughing]

873
00:41:50,341 --> 00:41:52,384
[Viola] And she said,
"Girl no." I said, "Yeah."

874
00:41:53,385 --> 00:41:55,387
"I really think I met somebody."

875
00:41:55,471 --> 00:41:59,683
And then I made the connection
with her too. I told her everything.

876
00:42:01,143 --> 00:42:03,437
I was shocked. Sort of like magic.

877
00:42:04,980 --> 00:42:06,857
Um, yeah.

878
00:42:06,941 --> 00:42:08,442
[Oprah] Your life hasn't been the same

879
00:42:08,526 --> 00:42:13,656
since the two of you
actually became bonded together.

880
00:42:13,739 --> 00:42:15,741
[Viola] It has not been the same.

881
00:42:15,824 --> 00:42:18,035
[Oprah] That's why this book
is so important.

882
00:42:18,118 --> 00:42:20,996
I called up Gayle. I go,
"You need to do what Viola did."

883
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:22,831
"You need to get down on your knees."

884
00:42:22,915 --> 00:42:24,959
"You need to pray
and ask for what you want."

885
00:42:25,042 --> 00:42:29,838
But also looking for the kind of life
he has led before you.

886
00:42:29,922 --> 00:42:34,009
I was in therapy at the time,
and I remember my therapist just saying,

887
00:42:34,093 --> 00:42:36,095
"Viola, find someone who loves you."

888
00:42:37,346 --> 00:42:39,181
"Just find someone who loves you."

889
00:42:39,848 --> 00:42:41,934
And I remember saying that to Julius too.

890
00:42:42,017 --> 00:42:43,227
"I'm just looking for someone

891
00:42:43,310 --> 00:42:45,563
who'd just lay down their life
for me, that loves me."

892
00:42:45,646 --> 00:42:47,439
He's like, "I love you."

893
00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:49,441
[Viola laughing]

894
00:42:49,525 --> 00:42:54,071
And I remember we both stopped,
and I looked at him, and he looked at me.

895
00:42:54,572 --> 00:42:56,115
-Aw.
-[Viola] You know?

896
00:42:56,198 --> 00:42:59,868
He was like,
"I'm all those things, V. I am."

897
00:43:00,619 --> 00:43:04,415
And then we… we made something
to eat like we'd usually do. [laughing]

898
00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:08,586
You say there are moments in your life
that absolutely live up to the hype.

899
00:43:08,669 --> 00:43:13,007
And one of those moments
certainly was the adoption of Genesis.

900
00:43:13,090 --> 00:43:14,633
[uplifting music playing]

901
00:43:14,717 --> 00:43:16,594
[Oprah] How did it change you as a woman?

902
00:43:18,387 --> 00:43:21,223
<i>In 2011, Viola and her husband, Julius,</i>

903
00:43:21,307 --> 00:43:24,476
<i>adopted a baby girl</i>
<i>who was living in foster care</i>

904
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:27,021
<i>in Viola's home state of Rhode Island.</i>

905
00:43:27,855 --> 00:43:29,690
<i>They named her "Genesis."</i>

906
00:43:29,773 --> 00:43:32,359
<i>Today Genesis is 11.</i>

907
00:43:33,694 --> 00:43:35,529
[Viola] Oh man, Genesis.

908
00:43:37,197 --> 00:43:40,326
You know, to live
for something bigger than yourself.

909
00:43:42,870 --> 00:43:44,913
I mean, that's what it was.

910
00:43:45,789 --> 00:43:49,877
The first time she looked at me
and squeezed me

911
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:53,672
and made me believe
that I could be her mom,

912
00:43:54,340 --> 00:43:56,050
and I could mother her and…

913
00:43:57,426 --> 00:44:02,056
And that, sort of, just really pure love
that only children can give you.

914
00:44:02,139 --> 00:44:03,015
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

915
00:44:03,098 --> 00:44:04,516
[Viola] And I'll tell you one thing.

916
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:07,603
All of the tools you need
to raise a little girl,

917
00:44:07,686 --> 00:44:09,938
the affirmations, all those things,

918
00:44:10,022 --> 00:44:11,982
while you're doing that,
you're healing yourself.

919
00:44:12,066 --> 00:44:13,776
[Oprah] Yeah. My next question is,

920
00:44:13,859 --> 00:44:18,489
how have you navigated raising a daughter

921
00:44:18,572 --> 00:44:21,283
when you never got what you needed

922
00:44:21,367 --> 00:44:23,202
when you were being raised?

923
00:44:23,702 --> 00:44:26,455
It's my opportunity to be able to do that.

924
00:44:26,538 --> 00:44:29,124
And so does it feel
like giving that back to yourself?

925
00:44:29,208 --> 00:44:30,751
-[Viola] Absolutely.
-Yes.

926
00:44:30,834 --> 00:44:33,587
Little Viola is always running around.

927
00:44:33,671 --> 00:44:34,505
[Oprah] Mm-hmm.

928
00:44:34,588 --> 00:44:36,548
You know, sort of guiding me.

929
00:44:37,049 --> 00:44:42,179
Yeah. And also Genesis
being very different from who I am

930
00:44:42,262 --> 00:44:46,392
is helping me also see myself
in a different way.

931
00:44:46,475 --> 00:44:49,561
[Oprah] You wrote this on social media
about your own mother, May Alice.

932
00:44:49,645 --> 00:44:52,981
You said, "This is the woman who birthed
me, loves me, and would die for me."

933
00:44:53,065 --> 00:44:57,027
"Our bond runs deeper
than anything man-made or given."

934
00:44:57,111 --> 00:44:59,238
"No one can love you
like your mama loves you."

935
00:44:59,321 --> 00:45:01,198
"Not even the love of your life."

936
00:45:01,281 --> 00:45:03,742
So what did you learn from your own mother

937
00:45:03,826 --> 00:45:08,539
that you have now been able
to pass on and transfer to Genesis?

938
00:45:09,915 --> 00:45:13,919
Number one, that I believe my mom
did the best she could with what she knew.

939
00:45:14,002 --> 00:45:14,920
[Oprah] Mm.

940
00:45:16,171 --> 00:45:17,131
And also,

941
00:45:17,631 --> 00:45:21,385
my mom is very smart.

942
00:45:22,386 --> 00:45:26,223
My mom sees people
and she sees through people.

943
00:45:26,765 --> 00:45:29,143
Oh, she could read them, right?
She's one who can read them.

944
00:45:29,226 --> 00:45:31,019
-Yeah.
-[Oprah] She could read 'em. Yeah.

945
00:45:31,103 --> 00:45:32,271
I appreciate that.

946
00:45:32,354 --> 00:45:35,691
Yeah. When I talk to you
about <i>Ma Rainey's Black Bottom,</i>

947
00:45:35,774 --> 00:45:39,737
You said, one of the ways
you go into examining a character,

948
00:45:39,820 --> 00:45:41,572
one of the many ways,

949
00:45:41,655 --> 00:45:45,659
is by asking,
"What is this character living for?"

950
00:45:45,743 --> 00:45:46,577
Yeah.

951
00:45:46,660 --> 00:45:49,997
[Oprah] So I end
our conversation today with,

952
00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:55,794
what are you, Viola Davis, now living for?

953
00:45:56,837 --> 00:46:00,799
First of all, I'm living
for my peace and my joy.

954
00:46:00,883 --> 00:46:01,800
[Oprah] Mm.

955
00:46:04,428 --> 00:46:05,304
I am.

956
00:46:06,096 --> 00:46:08,098
I wanna be happy in my life.

957
00:46:10,142 --> 00:46:12,644
And I know happiness is a journey.

958
00:46:13,145 --> 00:46:14,354
It's not a destination.

959
00:46:14,438 --> 00:46:16,315
I know it's speckled with bad,

960
00:46:16,398 --> 00:46:20,444
but I wanna feel some level
of peace and joy in my life.

961
00:46:22,154 --> 00:46:23,113
Absolutely.

962
00:46:23,614 --> 00:46:25,699
To help people to live better.

963
00:46:25,783 --> 00:46:27,075
Absolutely.

964
00:46:27,159 --> 00:46:28,243
You have done that.

965
00:46:28,327 --> 00:46:31,205
In finding yourself,
you've helped all of us

966
00:46:31,288 --> 00:46:34,458
who hear your story, who read your story,

967
00:46:34,541 --> 00:46:36,627
who see you be the light you are…

968
00:46:36,710 --> 00:46:38,796
-Thank you.
-…find a part of ourselves.

969
00:46:38,879 --> 00:46:40,088
And I thank you so much.

970
00:46:40,172 --> 00:46:42,716
I'm so excited
for people to read <i>Finding Me.</i>

971
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:44,635
It is astonishing

972
00:46:44,718 --> 00:46:46,720
what you have been able to endure.

973
00:46:46,804 --> 00:46:50,641
And for us to see you
to come into this other side of yourself,

974
00:46:51,141 --> 00:46:55,229
makes it possible for us
to believe it's possible for ourselves.

975
00:46:55,312 --> 00:46:56,480
So, thank you.

976
00:46:56,563 --> 00:46:59,066
-Thank you, Oprah. [chuckling]
-[Oprah] Thank you, Viola.

977
00:46:59,149 --> 00:47:02,861
I just wanna say to you all,
<i>Finding Me</i> is available on April 26th,

978
00:47:02,945 --> 00:47:04,530
wherever books are sold.

979
00:47:04,613 --> 00:47:05,531
And the audio book too.

980
00:47:05,614 --> 00:47:09,117
[in Viola's voice]
Viola in her world-famous Viola voice…

981
00:47:09,201 --> 00:47:13,121
[in normal voice] …reads her own story
that you all need to hear.

982
00:47:13,205 --> 00:47:14,957
So I hope you'll get a book.

983
00:47:15,040 --> 00:47:17,376
And when you get it, buy one for a friend,

984
00:47:17,459 --> 00:47:19,711
'cause you're gonna want
to talk about it with a friend.

985
00:47:19,795 --> 00:47:21,547
That's what I did with Gayle.

986
00:47:21,630 --> 00:47:24,591
I got it, and then Gayle's like,
"Well, send me a copy."

987
00:47:24,675 --> 00:47:26,760
So get it, and then get one for a friend.

988
00:47:27,261 --> 00:47:28,345
Yeah. Thank you.

989
00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:30,848
[inspirational music playing]

990
00:47:47,698 --> 00:47:48,782
[music fades]



