1
00:00:00,375 --> 00:00:01,666
This movie is a pamphlet.

2
00:00:01,750 --> 00:00:04,416
We do not condone vices
such as drug or alcohol use.

3
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX

4
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

5
00:00:25,958 --> 00:00:30,416
A 100% FICTIONAL STORY
INSPIRED BY 100 TRUE STORIES

6
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:23,875
Yes, Mom, we broke up!
We just weren't compatible.

7
00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:28,000
She wanted kids, and I…
Just that, she wanted kids.

8
00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:32,000
Mom, to own my own house,
I need to buy it first.

9
00:01:32,083 --> 00:01:34,625
And a child holds you back in your career.

10
00:01:35,375 --> 00:01:38,333
Exactly! That's what I said.

11
00:01:38,416 --> 00:01:42,541
When I'm project manager,
I'll give you grandkids.

12
00:01:42,625 --> 00:01:44,375
Bro, do you have one Leu?

13
00:01:44,458 --> 00:01:46,333
-What's that?
-Some money.

14
00:01:46,416 --> 00:01:48,333
-Do you have Revolut?
-What's that?

15
00:01:48,416 --> 00:01:51,541
How do you expect me to help you
if you don't help yourself?

16
00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:56,625
<i>Welcome to FU Global!</i>

17
00:01:57,875 --> 00:01:58,958
I got it.

18
00:02:01,083 --> 00:02:06,375
I have to hang up, I'm late for work.
Yes, I went to the doctor.

19
00:02:08,041 --> 00:02:09,791
No, I'm fine.

20
00:02:10,583 --> 00:02:11,958
It's nothing serious.

21
00:02:12,041 --> 00:02:15,583
The doctor said
I might be suffering from anxiety.

22
00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:18,083
No!

23
00:02:18,166 --> 00:02:20,291
-Gina, how are the kids?
-They got measles.

24
00:02:20,375 --> 00:02:22,208
Good! Wonderful!

25
00:02:22,291 --> 00:02:25,333
It's the excuse of the century,
not a disease. I'm fine.

26
00:02:25,416 --> 00:02:29,458
-How's the bossman?
-Don't jinx it till it's certain!

27
00:02:31,541 --> 00:02:34,458
Don't know when I'll visit. Kisses!

28
00:02:36,916 --> 00:02:39,958
Mom, I have seven people
who depend on me, I need to…

29
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:43,791
Morning!

30
00:02:43,875 --> 00:02:47,791
-Where is everyone?
-Half smoking, half drinking coffee.

31
00:02:50,541 --> 00:02:53,208
What about the Black Friday
summer campaign?

32
00:02:53,291 --> 00:02:56,041
-Two!
-Waiting on you.

33
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:01,291
-Spira Bank offer?
-Waiting on you.

34
00:03:04,708 --> 00:03:08,708
-And you? What do you think we should do?
-Whatever you think.

35
00:03:12,333 --> 00:03:14,500
Diana, what the fudge are you doing?

36
00:03:14,583 --> 00:03:18,333
-Looking for espadrilles. Are you blind?
-Can't you do that after six?

37
00:03:18,416 --> 00:03:22,333
-After six is my free time.
-You think it's okay to do this at work?

38
00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:26,333
This isn't work, it's just a job.
I'm not a laborer.

39
00:03:33,666 --> 00:03:36,125
Let me take this garbage out.

40
00:03:38,416 --> 00:03:42,750
-You took it out already. It's empty.
-Empty or not, I have to change it.

41
00:03:42,833 --> 00:03:46,375
-You want people to say I'm not working?
-Put the bag back.

42
00:03:46,458 --> 00:03:48,166
I took it out already.

43
00:03:48,250 --> 00:03:51,875
-It's still a bag!
-It's garbage now.

44
00:03:53,458 --> 00:03:56,083
Do you want Ms. Nico
to give me a bad report?

45
00:03:56,166 --> 00:03:59,541
No one will pick on you.
You're the only one working here.

46
00:03:59,625 --> 00:04:02,875
And with a broken arm.
You're afraid of Nicoleta now?

47
00:04:03,833 --> 00:04:05,958
-Morning.
-Morning.

48
00:04:06,041 --> 00:04:09,875
The team building is in three weeks
and we're not fully booked.

49
00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:13,500
Because for the past three years,
the Cluj division keeps beating us?

50
00:04:13,583 --> 00:04:17,541
That's why Mr. Oprea
wants us to win this year.

51
00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:21,333
'Happiness Cup'. Sounds great.
I'll email you about it.

52
00:04:22,666 --> 00:04:24,833
You already said that last week.

53
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:31,375
Kind reminder, last week I sent an email
with AI solutions to reduce expenses.

54
00:04:32,083 --> 00:04:33,750
And I told you I'll email you.

55
00:04:35,166 --> 00:04:38,333
Kind reminder, today we're getting
the evaluation reports.

56
00:04:38,416 --> 00:04:40,958
-Good luck!
-Thanks!

57
00:04:41,041 --> 00:04:42,708
-Wait up! Nico!
-Yes!

58
00:04:42,791 --> 00:04:44,375
-Do you hate me?
-No!

59
00:04:44,458 --> 00:04:47,208
-Honestly now!
-Of course not!

60
00:04:48,625 --> 00:04:50,833
When did you get here?

61
00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:58,875
-Do you think they're doing it?
-Mr. Emil, how can you say that?

62
00:04:58,958 --> 00:05:02,791
Mr. Oprea only screws
the girls in accounting.

63
00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:09,083
-And Nicoleta?
-Nicoleta is HR. She screws all of us.

64
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:16,000
Mr. Emil, you know what your problem is?
You work too much.

65
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:16,916
THE COOLEST BOSS

66
00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:21,291
You're a smart guy. But your problem is
that you work too much.

67
00:05:23,583 --> 00:05:25,083
And that's a problem?

68
00:05:25,166 --> 00:05:27,541
I just told you it's a problem.
Are you stupid?

69
00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:28,875
Nico!

70
00:05:28,958 --> 00:05:30,291
-Is he stupid?
-Yes, boss!

71
00:05:30,375 --> 00:05:32,125
I just told him he's smart.

72
00:05:32,208 --> 00:05:33,916
-Are you stupid?
-Yes, boss!

73
00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:37,875
'He doesn't get teamwork.

74
00:05:37,958 --> 00:05:40,916
Puts too much pressure.
Sends emails at 8:00 PM.'

75
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,333
We should work harder.
It's Black Friday, the summer edition.

76
00:05:44,416 --> 00:05:46,375
Do you even know what we do there?

77
00:05:47,291 --> 00:05:50,791
- Processing credit cards.
- And what do we actually do?

78
00:05:51,375 --> 00:05:52,208
Nico!

79
00:05:52,291 --> 00:05:55,041
At PLM Global, we add value
through operational excellence

80
00:05:55,125 --> 00:05:57,750
and understanding the partners'
business processes.

81
00:06:04,166 --> 00:06:08,583
We help people get installments.
Installments calm people down.

82
00:06:08,666 --> 00:06:11,583
They don't complain.
They don't feel wronged anymore.

83
00:06:11,666 --> 00:06:13,000
That sounds pretty bad.

84
00:06:13,083 --> 00:06:15,166
-I like it.
-She likes it.

85
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:16,916
See how happy she looks?

86
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,583
You look upset.

87
00:06:18,666 --> 00:06:20,416
-Do you have kids?
-No.

88
00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:21,791
-Installments?
-I rent.

89
00:06:21,875 --> 00:06:25,416
-See? You're stupid. What's our slogan?
-Making dreams come true…

90
00:06:28,541 --> 00:06:30,541
Making dreams come true in installments.

91
00:06:30,625 --> 00:06:32,208
-Nico!
-Yes.

92
00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:33,708
-Do you have kids?
-Yes!

93
00:06:33,791 --> 00:06:35,875
-Installments?
-Where do I even begin?

94
00:06:35,958 --> 00:06:39,541
-Are you upset?
-No! Unless you want me to be.

95
00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:43,500
See? Life is simple when you have
kids and installments.

96
00:06:43,583 --> 00:06:45,041
You're happy to have a job.

97
00:06:45,125 --> 00:06:48,708
When you have no kids
or installments, you hate life.

98
00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:54,375
And we in this company don't hate life.

99
00:06:56,458 --> 00:07:01,291
<i>All together. We are all a big family.</i>

100
00:07:04,333 --> 00:07:05,583
Please, God.

101
00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:10,541
Make it drop, God! God, make it…

102
00:07:12,791 --> 00:07:14,250
-Hi!
-Hi!

103
00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:16,708
-May I join you?
-Sure.

104
00:07:19,708 --> 00:07:21,375
Mercury is retrograding.

105
00:07:25,583 --> 00:07:26,791
-Great day!
-You too!

106
00:07:29,375 --> 00:07:32,416
I suggest you don't take it
as a step back.

107
00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:35,458
It's more of a horizontal promotion.

108
00:07:35,541 --> 00:07:39,500
-Nico, give us a minute.
-Yes, boss!

109
00:07:39,583 --> 00:07:41,875
If you want to lead, I have a department.

110
00:07:41,958 --> 00:07:44,791
They've gone an entire year
without a boss or results.

111
00:07:44,875 --> 00:07:50,791
-What department?
-A special one.

112
00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,750
ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION

113
00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:53,041
Uh-huh.

114
00:08:56,958 --> 00:08:58,625
Yeah!

115
00:08:58,708 --> 00:09:02,458
They didn't demote me. They promoted me.

116
00:09:03,666 --> 00:09:06,708
Horizontally. Yes, Mom.

117
00:09:06,791 --> 00:09:10,708
Mom, I'm going to lead a lot of people.

118
00:09:10,791 --> 00:09:11,875
Bye, Mom.

119
00:09:13,625 --> 00:09:18,666
Hi. Hello! Hi! Soft 'hey'.

120
00:09:21,375 --> 00:09:26,000
Hi guys, I'm your new team… leader.

121
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:30,666
-Where's everyone?
-Half smoking, half drinking coffee.

122
00:09:33,958 --> 00:09:35,291
Is this…?

123
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:38,083
It is.

124
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:50,583
Let's start with introductions.
I'm Emil. I'm your new team leader.

125
00:09:50,666 --> 00:09:52,958
-What did you do?
-Excuse me?

126
00:09:53,041 --> 00:09:55,666
You did something to get demoted.

127
00:09:55,750 --> 00:09:59,375
They didn't demote me.
They promoted me. Horiz…

128
00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:07,500
I want to prove
that the call center department is useful.

129
00:10:07,583 --> 00:10:09,958
And show you that work can be fun.

130
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:14,458
Why?

131
00:10:15,166 --> 00:10:19,041
What do you mean 'why'?
You should love your job.

132
00:10:19,125 --> 00:10:22,833
That's a hobby. If work was fun,
I would pay to be here.

133
00:10:23,458 --> 00:10:26,375
Nope. I love watching <i>Asia Express.</i>

134
00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:29,416
That means I clock in
lots of overtime hours.

135
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:34,791
Onel, stop talking.
You're depriving your brain of oxygen.

136
00:10:34,875 --> 00:10:41,625
Guys, let's do a call simulation.
I'm the customer who has a problem.

137
00:10:47,541 --> 00:10:50,250
Hello, you have called FU Global.
I'm an idiot.

138
00:10:50,333 --> 00:10:53,333
-How may I help you?
-What are you doing?

139
00:10:53,416 --> 00:10:58,458
That's the procedure. They call,
I answer. They swear, I transfer them.

140
00:10:58,541 --> 00:11:01,416
How hard can it be to talk to a customer?

141
00:11:03,416 --> 00:11:04,541
Give it here!

142
00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:10,666
Suck my dick.

143
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:13,250
Look, take the call from Buzău.

144
00:11:18,750 --> 00:11:21,833
Hello, you have called FU Global.
My name… What?

145
00:11:21,916 --> 00:11:26,208
<i>-Do you have my name on the card?</i>
-I know the name is on the card…

146
00:11:26,833 --> 00:11:32,000
What do you mean how I got your number?
I'm not being rude. Do what?

147
00:11:34,083 --> 00:11:36,583
I can't put anything in that hole.
It's too small.

148
00:11:36,666 --> 00:11:40,000
<i>-You've ruined my life.</i>
-Got it. I'll transfer you.

149
00:11:42,958 --> 00:11:44,375
FU Global, good afternoon.

150
00:11:44,458 --> 00:11:46,541
<i>-Your mother is a whore!</i>
-Yup! True.

151
00:11:46,625 --> 00:11:48,583
Of course! We all deserve to die.

152
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:52,375
Let's see how we can solve that.
Can I get your social security number?

153
00:11:53,625 --> 00:11:55,541
How may I help you?

154
00:11:55,625 --> 00:11:57,875
Read a book. I don't know.

155
00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:11,500
Ma'am, I'm not saying 5G doesn't exist.
I'm saying it's not in pigeons.

156
00:12:12,541 --> 00:12:16,833
You have called the police. Hello! Hello!

157
00:12:18,833 --> 00:12:21,500
-What are you doing?
-Working.

158
00:12:22,333 --> 00:12:24,583
You just hung up on a client.

159
00:12:24,666 --> 00:12:29,125
-No. He hung up on me.
-Because you said you're the police.

160
00:12:29,208 --> 00:12:31,500
Our goal is to solve people's problems.

161
00:12:31,583 --> 00:12:36,416
No, that's the company's goal.
My goal is to get as many calls as I can.

162
00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:39,166
Don't you understand that I'm not human?
I'm a robot.

163
00:12:39,250 --> 00:12:41,916
I'm a robot.

164
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,625
You did not solve their problems.

165
00:12:44,708 --> 00:12:47,708
I did. It can't be done.

166
00:12:47,791 --> 00:12:51,666
Don't you sleep better
when you know it can't be done?

167
00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:54,791
Horia? Do a <i>Macarena, </i>dude!

168
00:12:55,791 --> 00:12:57,041
Let's do it!

169
00:12:57,750 --> 00:13:02,416
<i>Macarena!</i>
He goes through five calls in 30 seconds.

170
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,333
You don't believe it? Just watch.

171
00:13:05,416 --> 00:13:07,291
Nipple!

172
00:13:08,541 --> 00:13:10,416
Two, three and go.

173
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:12,791
You called the IRS.
We close accounts. Hello?

174
00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:16,041
You're live with Oreste!

175
00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:21,750
Hello? Thank you for donating
two Euros for… Hello?

176
00:13:21,833 --> 00:13:26,125
You fucking bastard, if you call my wife
one more time, I'll… Hello?

177
00:13:26,208 --> 00:13:30,833
I'm Florin Piersic
and I'm so happy to talk to someone.

178
00:13:30,916 --> 00:13:34,458
I miss talking to… Hello?

179
00:13:34,541 --> 00:13:38,291
-What's the time?
-21 seconds.

180
00:13:38,375 --> 00:13:40,833
-Great job!
-Yes! A new record.

181
00:13:40,916 --> 00:13:42,375
Excellent work!

182
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:47,791
<i>Welcome to FU Global.</i>

183
00:13:48,708 --> 00:13:50,791
-Yes.
<i>-We believe in inclusion.</i>

184
00:13:50,875 --> 00:13:53,250
I forgot my wallet. Please let me in.

185
00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:56,125
-Name?
-Horia.

186
00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:59,291
-Horia what?
<i>-We are a big family here.</i>

187
00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:00,333
Horia Brenciu.

188
00:14:01,583 --> 00:14:02,625
Do you have ID?

189
00:14:02,708 --> 00:14:06,541
I just said I forgot my wallet.
I don't have ID on me.

190
00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:08,625
Security!

191
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:16,416
She called the special forces!
Sit down before you have a stroke.

192
00:14:16,500 --> 00:14:20,083
-You have heart pills in that canister?
-Grațiela, right?

193
00:14:20,958 --> 00:14:23,125
Weren't you
on season three of <i>Love Island</i>?

194
00:14:24,208 --> 00:14:25,541
Season four!

195
00:14:26,958 --> 00:14:32,000
-Have you considered changing your name?
-Me? The fat guy should change it!

196
00:14:38,041 --> 00:14:40,083
This slut wants money again.

197
00:14:40,875 --> 00:14:42,166
What now?

198
00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:46,833
I'm not giving you anything.
I'm not giving you any money.

199
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:51,583
Because you're a piece of shit!

200
00:14:51,666 --> 00:14:56,541
The moment mom laid eyes on you,
she said you were gonna fuck up my life.

201
00:14:57,916 --> 00:15:01,333
Even whores have more common sense!

202
00:15:03,458 --> 00:15:06,125
-The wife?
-My son.

203
00:15:09,958 --> 00:15:12,750
-Can you help me out?
-With what?

204
00:15:13,416 --> 00:15:17,208
It's obvious everyone follows your lead.

205
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,541
-Do you think you could…
-What?

206
00:15:20,958 --> 00:15:25,125
-Please make them like me!
-How can I do that?

207
00:15:25,208 --> 00:15:27,791
I don't know. Ask them to come in on time.

208
00:15:27,875 --> 00:15:29,541
How could I ask them that?

209
00:15:29,625 --> 00:15:33,500
Then just encourage them
to be more productive.

210
00:15:33,583 --> 00:15:38,375
I'm just an employee. I don't know how.

211
00:15:38,458 --> 00:15:42,000
You know what? Screw that crap!

212
00:15:45,416 --> 00:15:48,083
Do you think I enjoy
being on your territory?

213
00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:51,041
Don't you think I have testicles? I do!

214
00:15:51,125 --> 00:15:54,916
But I act like a man
and I leave my balls at the door.

215
00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,250
Okay. Deal!

216
00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:08,250
Guys! Listen up! He has testicles!

217
00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,666
Can I take another one?
I have a twin that eats a lot.

218
00:16:19,750 --> 00:16:23,625
And this is for my twin cousin.
He's a good guy.

219
00:16:23,708 --> 00:16:25,916
-Take as much as you need.
-Thank you!

220
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,833
As team leader,

221
00:16:28,916 --> 00:16:34,250
it is my duty
to place the team's needs first.

222
00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:42,500
-Go ahead!
-You've got dessert, Onel.

223
00:16:42,583 --> 00:16:43,958
It's dessert?

224
00:16:44,041 --> 00:16:48,000
It's a wet paper towel.
Like toilet paper, but better.

225
00:17:02,666 --> 00:17:04,083
Oh yes!

226
00:17:06,666 --> 00:17:09,458
Șerban, I feel so loved right now.

227
00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:15,875
Can anyone tell me what this is?

228
00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:20,375
Onel?

229
00:17:21,291 --> 00:17:23,875
-Balls!
-What? No!

230
00:17:23,958 --> 00:17:26,166
-Two balls.
-No.

231
00:17:27,791 --> 00:17:31,333
Can anyone tell me
what this looks like now?

232
00:17:32,791 --> 00:17:33,791
Șerban!

233
00:17:33,875 --> 00:17:38,375
-Two hairy balls?
-Synergy!

234
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,875
It's obvious it's synergy!

235
00:17:41,166 --> 00:17:44,625
I'm sorry. It's just… it's synergy.

236
00:17:45,583 --> 00:17:48,125
Does anyone know what synergy is?
Of course not!

237
00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:50,958
The coordination between
two entities to gain an effect

238
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:53,916
greater than if taking
the two individually.

239
00:17:58,375 --> 00:18:03,541
-You're so stupid, Lorena!
-No, no! Well done, Lorena! She's right!

240
00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:06,416
-'Well done, Lorena!'
-No, dude. Listen up.

241
00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:10,250
It means that two balls together

242
00:18:10,333 --> 00:18:12,500
are better than one.

243
00:18:13,208 --> 00:18:17,041
Okay. Apparently we'll go with testicles.

244
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,125
Right.

245
00:18:19,208 --> 00:18:23,958
Let's presume this is our company.
And it has…

246
00:18:24,041 --> 00:18:27,083
-The shape of a dick.
-…multiple layers.

247
00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:31,041
-Up here we have the top of…
-The dick.

248
00:18:32,083 --> 00:18:33,000
…pyramid. Leaders.

249
00:18:34,583 --> 00:18:37,666
-Here we have…
-The middle of the dick.

250
00:18:39,583 --> 00:18:41,041
The middle class.

251
00:18:42,333 --> 00:18:43,666
Employees.

252
00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:47,125
-And here we have…
-The base of the penis.

253
00:18:48,125 --> 00:18:49,458
Close enough.

254
00:18:49,541 --> 00:18:54,833
'Low'. Now, what's missing here?

255
00:19:01,583 --> 00:19:03,500
An onion?

256
00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:06,500
-No.
-A pussy.

257
00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:11,833
What does it mean? What does it stand for?

258
00:19:11,916 --> 00:19:14,708
-Sauron's Eye?
-A black hole?

259
00:19:14,791 --> 00:19:17,791
-The Virgin Mary?
-The client!

260
00:19:18,750 --> 00:19:20,333
Look, it's really--

261
00:19:20,416 --> 00:19:25,625
-OK. Now then. Who are we?
-The foreskin.

262
00:19:25,708 --> 00:19:29,083
-What's our mission?
-To screw the client.

263
00:19:29,166 --> 00:19:32,375
-To get?
-Added value.

264
00:19:32,458 --> 00:19:35,875
And this, my friends,
is the definition of capitalism.

265
00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:48,291
-Make yourself comfortable. How is it?
-Great! Things are moving.

266
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:49,333
Come here!

267
00:19:58,500 --> 00:20:02,875
-What do you think about AI?
-It represents the future.

268
00:20:02,958 --> 00:20:06,250
Exactly! I'm closing down the call center.

269
00:20:06,333 --> 00:20:08,333
-What?
-It was Nicoleta's idea.

270
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:12,166
It's cheaper to replace operators
with a robot. Watch this!

271
00:20:15,041 --> 00:20:19,000
<i>Hi. I'm Clara. Welcome to FU Global…</i>

272
00:20:22,375 --> 00:20:25,416
-What about the employees?
-What about them?

273
00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:27,583
-What will you do about them?
-Fired!

274
00:20:28,958 --> 00:20:31,666
Don't worry. Starting from September.

275
00:20:31,750 --> 00:20:35,916
If you play nice and befriend Nicoleta,
we'll keep seeing you here.

276
00:20:39,333 --> 00:20:41,541
Why me?

277
00:20:42,500 --> 00:20:46,458
-How are you doing?
-He fired me.

278
00:20:48,750 --> 00:20:52,208
-Help me with this.
-Sure!

279
00:20:52,291 --> 00:20:56,458
Ms. Nico said she can't pay me anymore.

280
00:20:57,291 --> 00:21:02,291
-And who's going to clean now?
-She said she has a robot.

281
00:21:02,375 --> 00:21:06,458
Apparently they can vacuum and mop.

282
00:21:07,083 --> 00:21:11,458
-That's exactly what you were doing.
-Yeah, but the robot speaks English too.

283
00:21:11,541 --> 00:21:13,458
In my day, we studied Russian.

284
00:21:13,541 --> 00:21:15,125
See ya!

285
00:21:21,208 --> 00:21:23,041
This chick is so hot! Swipe!

286
00:21:24,416 --> 00:21:26,958
What if I get you the Happy Cup?

287
00:21:29,250 --> 00:21:31,500
You think you can beat the Transylvanians?

288
00:21:36,083 --> 00:21:39,500
Would that be proof
that the CC department is valuable?

289
00:21:39,583 --> 00:21:43,333
If you get me the cup, I'll make you
project manager by Fall.

290
00:21:46,541 --> 00:21:50,708
If not, at the end of the month
you're all fired.

291
00:21:51,541 --> 00:21:52,875
Good luck!

292
00:21:55,875 --> 00:22:00,875
-I know how it sounds, but…
-Fuck your trip!

293
00:22:01,708 --> 00:22:03,375
I really like you guys.

294
00:22:03,458 --> 00:22:07,375
And I believe this team building
can bring us together.

295
00:22:07,458 --> 00:22:09,083
As friends.

296
00:22:12,416 --> 00:22:16,458
If you help me win the team building,
in two months I'm out of your hair.

297
00:22:17,666 --> 00:22:18,958
I'll leave!

298
00:22:20,125 --> 00:22:23,166
-Two months?
-Two months.

299
00:22:36,833 --> 00:22:39,000
Why are we doing this?

300
00:22:39,083 --> 00:22:45,041
They want us to do team building
to make us happier.

301
00:22:45,125 --> 00:22:49,083
-They should try raising our salaries.
-But how would you be motivated?

302
00:22:49,166 --> 00:22:51,541
Money. That would motivate me.

303
00:22:52,416 --> 00:22:57,416
What the hell does "the theme is
political correctness" mean?

304
00:22:57,500 --> 00:23:00,291
-It seems complicated.
-It's not!

305
00:23:00,375 --> 00:23:06,250
We go there and fight departments
from Craiova, Iași and Transylvania.

306
00:23:06,333 --> 00:23:09,708
They say Cluj is the best.
But they're from Cluj, after all.

307
00:23:09,791 --> 00:23:13,916
-Really? Cluj? Fuck'em!
-The way they speak!

308
00:23:14,583 --> 00:23:19,875
Craiova is surely a bunch of nerdy wusses.

309
00:23:19,958 --> 00:23:23,250
And we can just get Moldavians drunk.

310
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:28,041
Isn't a team building where people drink
and have sex on the company's expense?

311
00:23:28,125 --> 00:23:29,875
Free beer? I'm in!

312
00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:32,916
Sex? In the vagina?

313
00:23:33,750 --> 00:23:37,083
Yes, Onel. Sex in the vagina.

314
00:23:51,416 --> 00:23:54,958
Șerban! Give me that vodka!

315
00:23:55,875 --> 00:23:58,125
-There you go, baby!
-Thanks!

316
00:23:59,166 --> 00:24:01,541
-You don't drink?
-I do.

317
00:24:04,791 --> 00:24:08,583
-How long have you been working here?
-Six years. Five too many.

318
00:24:08,666 --> 00:24:10,583
Onel, take a picture.

319
00:24:12,375 --> 00:24:15,833
Come on, Șerban.
I don't want to see your nipples. Go away!

320
00:24:15,916 --> 00:24:18,625
-We don't wanna see yours either.
-What do you want?

321
00:24:18,708 --> 00:24:23,541
-I'm surprised you're not team leader.
-Only men get leadership roles, right?

322
00:24:23,625 --> 00:24:24,916
I don't think so.

323
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,375
Then how did you get here?
You have no call center background.

324
00:24:29,041 --> 00:24:33,041
What's the deal
with "political correctness"?

325
00:24:34,791 --> 00:24:36,333
It's an art.

326
00:24:36,416 --> 00:24:40,291
The art of offending someone
without being blunt.

327
00:24:41,250 --> 00:24:46,250
How do you tell someone,
"Shut the fuck up, you idiot?"

328
00:24:47,041 --> 00:24:51,958
You say, "I appreciate your feedback,
and I'll consider it."

329
00:24:52,041 --> 00:24:56,083
-And if you say, 'I don't give a fuck'?
-'Send me an email.'

330
00:24:56,166 --> 00:25:00,208
'Fuck you?' How do you say that?
'Suck it!'

331
00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:03,250
'Kind reminder.'

332
00:25:28,208 --> 00:25:29,541
BUCEGI NATURE RESERVE

333
00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:45,291
MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE IN INSTALLMENTS

334
00:25:46,083 --> 00:25:48,958
It's like a really big park.

335
00:25:54,583 --> 00:25:56,500
Welcome to the Belmont!

336
00:25:56,583 --> 00:26:00,333
Unfortunately, all the rooms are reserved
for the FU Global team building.

337
00:26:01,791 --> 00:26:03,875
We're from the Bucharest call center.

338
00:26:03,958 --> 00:26:05,666
Let me check, please.

339
00:26:06,541 --> 00:26:10,208
FU, FU...

340
00:26:10,958 --> 00:26:13,583
What FU Is this? A different FU.

341
00:26:13,666 --> 00:26:16,416
Sometimes you can't tell
what the FU you're reading.

342
00:26:18,041 --> 00:26:21,750
Found it! There were six rooms.
Now there are only three.

343
00:26:22,500 --> 00:26:26,875
-What?
-Ms. Nicoleta made the reservation.

344
00:26:32,916 --> 00:26:34,375
Where will you sleep?

345
00:26:46,875 --> 00:26:48,541
What are you doing?

346
00:26:49,291 --> 00:26:53,833
What every man does when
he's finally away from his family.

347
00:26:57,791 --> 00:26:59,166
Time to smash some pussy!

348
00:27:00,875 --> 00:27:02,958
At least wait for me to leave the room.

349
00:27:04,833 --> 00:27:08,375
Forgive me! Excuse me!

350
00:27:11,708 --> 00:27:13,500
Close the freaking window!

351
00:27:17,041 --> 00:27:20,083
-Hey!
-Hey! How are you, Nico?

352
00:27:20,166 --> 00:27:24,041
Kind reminder,
starting from now I'm 'Ms.' to you, yes?

353
00:27:24,125 --> 00:27:27,375
-How's the room?
-Perfect! Thanks.

354
00:27:30,875 --> 00:27:32,166
It's the radio.

355
00:27:33,041 --> 00:27:39,000
I know you've never stayed at a four star,
but please don't embarrass the company.

356
00:27:39,666 --> 00:27:41,375
Don't get wasted!

357
00:27:45,958 --> 00:27:48,166
Hey! What are you doing?

358
00:27:51,291 --> 00:27:52,791
Tits--

359
00:27:59,250 --> 00:28:01,000
Okay. I'll have a beer as well.

360
00:28:04,916 --> 00:28:06,250
Tits!

361
00:28:07,041 --> 00:28:10,166
-Are you trying to say you saw breasts?
-Yes!

362
00:28:14,541 --> 00:28:17,541
-Someone else arrived?
-The Moldavians. They're at the pool.

363
00:28:18,333 --> 00:28:20,125
Nice. We have a pool!

364
00:28:48,958 --> 00:28:50,333
That one is mine!

365
00:28:50,416 --> 00:28:52,916
-The first one is mine! I called it.
-That's mine!

366
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,791
Stop it! Don't embarrass me, please.

367
00:28:59,750 --> 00:29:01,333
-Hey!
-Hey!

368
00:29:02,125 --> 00:29:05,916
I'm Emil, and I'm senior team leader
at the Bucharest call center.

369
00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:07,250
They're my colleagues.

370
00:29:07,333 --> 00:29:10,333
-Andreea. Logistics lead.
-Lavinia.

371
00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:12,250
- Sandra. Nice to meet you.
-Luiza.

372
00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:13,833
-Bianca.
-I'm Maria.

373
00:29:13,916 --> 00:29:15,833
-Yeah, cool!
-Good for you!

374
00:29:15,916 --> 00:29:18,708
It seems the Cluj team is late.

375
00:29:20,083 --> 00:29:22,000
How about some volleyball?

376
00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:26,250
-Big fan.
-Onel, you're the goalkeeper.

377
00:30:35,916 --> 00:30:38,000
And what did you do last night?

378
00:30:38,625 --> 00:30:40,375
-Really?
- Yeah.

379
00:30:42,375 --> 00:30:48,000
-Sorry about earlier. Are you okay?
-Yeah! I'm fine!

380
00:30:48,083 --> 00:30:50,125
What challenge scares you the most?

381
00:30:50,833 --> 00:30:55,000
I wouldn't say they scare me.
You know how it is when you're in charge.

382
00:30:55,083 --> 00:30:56,708
You have responsibilities.

383
00:30:56,791 --> 00:31:01,083
-Is this your first time?
-On team building? We also came last year.

384
00:31:01,166 --> 00:31:03,458
The guys from Cluj won that as well.

385
00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:07,208
I heard they're…

386
00:31:08,666 --> 00:31:12,625
-Rough.
-No. They're okay.

387
00:31:23,541 --> 00:31:24,833
One of ours!

388
00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:40,041
I'm more scared
of the stags from Craiova.

389
00:31:44,166 --> 00:31:45,000
Who?

390
00:31:47,625 --> 00:31:48,875
The Internal Audit guys.

391
00:32:04,625 --> 00:32:06,208
Quiet! We're here!

392
00:32:07,541 --> 00:32:12,000
Hey, bro! I'm Laurențiu.
Consulting manager for Internal Audit.

393
00:32:12,083 --> 00:32:15,041
Hi. Emil! Senior team leader,
Bucharest call center.

394
00:32:15,125 --> 00:32:19,416
Great. This weekend call me 'Dread'.

395
00:32:21,750 --> 00:32:28,208
I'm Resin, this is Sharky, Shabby,

396
00:32:28,291 --> 00:32:30,333
Scandal and Mihai.

397
00:32:30,416 --> 00:32:36,791
-Hi, everyone!
-Shut the fuck up and grab the luggage!

398
00:32:39,166 --> 00:32:43,083
-Hi, baby! Did you miss me?
-You're still a bunch of pigs.

399
00:32:43,166 --> 00:32:44,250
Yeah, and you're…

400
00:32:46,375 --> 00:32:48,041
still beautiful.

401
00:32:50,083 --> 00:32:51,500
Pay attention!

402
00:32:51,583 --> 00:32:53,500
This is too much!

403
00:32:53,583 --> 00:32:56,541
Are they for real?

404
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:00,166
Auditing isn't easy.

405
00:33:00,250 --> 00:33:03,666
They count thousands of euros
14 hours a day.

406
00:33:04,916 --> 00:33:08,750
They use these three days to make up
for having no life the other 362.

407
00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:12,000
Couldn't we be more like them?

408
00:33:15,208 --> 00:33:16,583
Good afternoon!

409
00:33:17,250 --> 00:33:19,000
We got hoes here as well?

410
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:21,958
Nice.

411
00:33:22,041 --> 00:33:24,333
That's Horia. He's from Titan.

412
00:33:24,416 --> 00:33:27,208
He survived a stroke.

413
00:33:28,291 --> 00:33:30,000
Sit down and shut up!

414
00:33:31,416 --> 00:33:33,250
-Dude!
-Yeah!

415
00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,958
Let's talk to the guys.

416
00:33:59,791 --> 00:34:03,916
-Hi!
-Don't drink too much!

417
00:34:04,958 --> 00:34:08,291
-Come on.
-Sure, Dad.

418
00:34:08,375 --> 00:34:10,500
Look at that one.

419
00:34:14,791 --> 00:34:17,500
Yo, fat guy! Bring the shade over here!

420
00:34:19,958 --> 00:34:21,541
-Call it!
-Head.

421
00:34:21,625 --> 00:34:23,958
-Nope.
-Hit him!

422
00:34:25,166 --> 00:34:28,583
-Cheers!
-Cheers!

423
00:34:28,666 --> 00:34:32,166
Hey, guys,
I know it's your first team building

424
00:34:32,250 --> 00:34:36,125
and you're not used to the free stuff,
but let's not get wasted.

425
00:34:36,208 --> 00:34:38,041
Calm down, boss.

426
00:34:38,125 --> 00:34:43,916
-Firstly, the stags are more wasted.
-Firstly, the Cluj team are a pity bunch.

427
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:46,541
They haven't even made it here in time.

428
00:34:46,625 --> 00:34:50,625
-Cheers!
-Cheers!

429
00:34:50,708 --> 00:34:53,875
Cluj is here!

430
00:35:21,166 --> 00:35:25,916
Hi, everyone! So nice seeing you girls.

431
00:35:26,500 --> 00:35:29,416
Oy, so good to be here.

432
00:35:31,041 --> 00:35:33,500
Raul! Sales Manager.

433
00:35:33,583 --> 00:35:39,416
These are my colleagues. But I'll let them
introduce themselves, as is right.

434
00:35:39,500 --> 00:35:45,833
-Tase! My highest esteem goes out to you.
-Erika! I congratulate you already.

435
00:35:45,916 --> 00:35:48,708
-Why are they talking funny?
-Funny how?

436
00:35:48,791 --> 00:35:53,500
-Like they're lying.
-Kika! I bow to you.

437
00:35:53,583 --> 00:35:56,791
Popa! Aka Brain. I love you all.

438
00:35:56,875 --> 00:36:01,083
Paul! So sorry for being late.

439
00:36:01,166 --> 00:36:03,666
Don't worry.
That's just your genes. A bit slower.

440
00:36:06,958 --> 00:36:09,791
We were supposed to be here at 12:00,

441
00:36:09,875 --> 00:36:14,166
but we decided to stop
for a few hours to meditate at Simidiu.

442
00:36:14,250 --> 00:36:17,958
-Do you know where that is?
-Close to Blabanos.

443
00:36:19,208 --> 00:36:20,625
Did you hear that?

444
00:36:20,708 --> 00:36:26,625
Are these villages or flowers?

445
00:36:31,041 --> 00:36:32,291
So funny!

446
00:36:32,375 --> 00:36:38,375
There were two priests reconditioning
an orphanage and we just had to help.

447
00:36:39,750 --> 00:36:41,500
I'm gonna cry.

448
00:36:41,583 --> 00:36:47,500
We cried when the little guys smiled.

449
00:36:47,583 --> 00:36:49,458
Oy...

450
00:36:49,541 --> 00:36:52,375
Why didn't you adopt a few, oy?

451
00:36:52,458 --> 00:36:55,000
-What?
-What?

452
00:36:55,083 --> 00:37:00,000
-You don't joke about that.
-I'm so happy to see you.

453
00:37:00,083 --> 00:37:04,958
Let's check you in!
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