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Christmas, huh, the chicken wing of holidays.
Yeah, I said it.
A lot of work and definitely overrated.
Don't get me wrong, I like a day off just like the next guy.
But give me Juneteenth or the Fourth of July.
Heck, I even get down with Arbor Day.
At least then you plant a tree instead of chopping one down.
And before you go calling me a hater, you gotta know I have another big reason
for not messing with Christmas.
On this day, everybody's expecting many gifts
but not me, all I needed was one thing.
So, I went all the way to the top, to the one guy
that I knew could help with this one request.
Oh!
What do you want for Christmas, pally?
I already sent you a letter to the North Pole.
I'm a little behind on my letter-reading, so, what'll it be?
I want my parents to not fight. Can you do that, Santa?
I don't know. Maybe.
My dad wants a collapsible fishing rod.
He loves to fish.
So, if you could bring him the rod and he thinks it's from my mom,
well, that'll solve everything.
Is that your mom?
Yeah, that's her.
She look a little sad because my dad's been gone for a few days.
So, Santa, can you do that?
Where do you live?
I thought it was a little weird that Santa asked where I lived,
but look, the guy has so much to worry about on Christmas.
Things were going exactly the way I wanted them to.
My dad had come off his business trip
and made it home just in time for Christmas.
What's all this?
Eddie asked if we could have a proper Christmas.
It's beautiful.
My family was finally together for Christmas.
First time in forever.
Yeah, it's been a long time.
So we can make it all nice for Santa.
Right, Dad?
Yeah, because we wanna make it nice for Santa, son.
Little old me had high hopes for that night.
I mean, if you can't count on Santa Claus, who can you really count on?
So, I bet on old Saint Nick.
And for a moment, I thought I rolled sevens.
Hey, you stealing our stuff?
But instead, I crapped out.
No, Dad, no!
But nope.
He's come to help!
It wasn't Santa at all.
It was just that mall dude in a rented suit
there to take instead of give.
While my pops was deckin' Santa's halls.
Because of him, that was the last Christmas
we ever spent together as a family.
Stop!
That's when I learned not to count on Christmas.
Oh, yeah, and by the way, if he ever asks,
don't give Santa your home address.
♪ Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock ♪
♪ Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring ♪
♪ Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun ♪
♪ Now the jingle hop has begun ♪
- Yuck.
- You kidding me, every station.
Well, hello, Baby Girl, how are you today?
So good, because it's Christmas Eve.
Oh, yeah, that.
It's so dumb how you don't like Christmas.
Now, come on, you know I like it just fine.
I just don't like the music, decorations, ornaments,
the lights or the trees or the cookies,
and the excessive shopping.
You're a dodo. Are you gonna come by later?
Of course I'm gonna come by later.
- I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Hey, Baby Girl, I got another call.
Okay, then I'll see you later.
- Bye, Grumpus. - Bye.
- Moke, what up? - Hey, Merry Christmas from Atlanta PD.
We need our favorite crisis counselor.
- Can you get down to the arts center now? - Yep, I got you. I'm on the way.
Moke, talk to me, what's going on?
Check it out.
Do I even wanna know what he's doing up there?
- Did you get a name? - Nope.
You can take the ladder up.
Nah, I got this.
I'll tell you when to send it up for us, alright?
Hey, good day to you.
That's a nice beard, man.
I've been trying to grow mine out
and it just doesn't work for some reason.
- How you doing? You got a name? - I'm Luther.
Luther, I'm Eddie. And it's a pleasure to meet you.
- You police, Eddie? - No, no, no, I'm a clinician.
Social worker. I work with the police.
I help people that might be in some trouble
but not the police-needing kind of trouble.
So tell me, Luther, what are you doing up here?
I just wanna be up here on my own.
Okay, I get that, but let me tell you something, Luther.
My job, okay, the most important part of my job
is to never let someone who feels sad and alone
keep on feeling sad and alone.
Yeah, well, I do feel sad and alone today.
Yeah, Christmas can be tough.
That's right.
Did you have good Christmases growing up?
They were... they were the best.
- Did your mom do the cooking? - Yeah.
My mom made the biggest darn roast that you ever seen.
Yeah, mine did too, man.
- Did the meat fall off the bone? - Straight off.
- What about the baby carrots. - And molasses.
- Of course, yeah.
- And red potatoes. - Red potatoes, I love red potatoes.
- Skin on or skin off? - Skin on.
What do you take me as, a savage, Luther? Come on, man.
You got a sense of humor, my man.
What do you say we head on down, huh?
I'll get you a bed at Moonlight Mission, okay?
Maybe Christmas doesn't have to be so tricky.
You believe that?
I believe in baby carrots and red potatoes.
With the skin on.
Hey, everybody, this is Luther.
He's thinking about heading to the Moonlight Mission.
Let's send Doc Frawley by to take a look at him.
Call our girl Naomi over there at Finnegan's Chop House too,
tell them we'll need a few slices of their finest roast.
With all the fixings, right?
My man.
I'll be by tomorrow to check on him, okay?
- Okay. - Alright.
You have a very Merry Christmas, Eddie.
I don't know what that is but it sounds awful.
♪ Y'all gon' make me lose my mind ♪
- ♪ Up in here, up in here ♪ - Whoo!
Yeah, that's more like it.
♪ Up in here, up in here ♪
With Christmas Eve just hours away,
Congressman Conrad Harf attends the lighting of the tree
here in Lakewood, just outside the Atlanta Moonlight Mission
which provides transitional housing and direct care
to homeless men and women.
Hey, Luther, my man.
Go on, get you that roast.
A Christmas tree is like a pair of warm open hands
welcoming all to the season of love and sharing.
For me, the true wonder of Christmas Eve
is how it makes each of us, no matter our age
feel like little children.
We are all one big family of man
and the very best gift we can give
is to help those who have the least.
I mean that.
Always remember to be there for your family, Atlanta.
That was Congressman Conrad Harf
giving that inspiring and thoughtful speech.
Hey...
Hi. You look so shocked.
What do you see, ghosts from your past, present and future?
Very funny. Hey, Baby Girl.
Hi, Dad! We brought you Christmas dinner.
Wow. You are dressed up in red and green.
In case you bring me somewhere special.
I have to look the part.
Take this for me. Thank you.
Hold it up. Okay.
What's this about?
This is about me having a high degree of confidence
that you were not gonna come by tonight.
I didn't want you to disappoint our child on Christmas Eve.
Okay, so let me ask you, what's the point of us doing therapy
if you're not gonna let me try and prove to you that it's working.
Oh, Eddie, I was just giving you a head start.
The ham is the kind you like.
- With the pineapple loops in it? - And that brown sugar glaze.
You know what? Forget about the therapy.
Why don't we just go dancing tonight?
Hmm.
As tempting as that sounds, hmm, no.
I have some last-minute shopping to do, but please have my child home by 8:30.
Wait, wait. You're leaving?
Uh, yeah. I mean, it's the first time in what, almost a decade
that Daddy is not working on Christmas.
Sounds like some daddy-daughter fun time to me.
- Daddy-daughter fun time? - Your child loves Christmas.
- Yeah? - I know, I know...
- Just have fun. - I got it.
- You know me. - Okay.
- I'm Mr. Fun. - Alright.
Bye, baby, I'll see you later!
- Bye, Mom! - Have a good time.
Put that food in the fridge, your daddy'll leave it out on the counter.
Oh, hold up.
I still don't understand why we have to wear these dopey things.
It's called blending in.
It's Christmas Eve, which is the genius of the plan
and also its inherent flaw.
You can't just show up at people's homes.
This way, you look like a bunch of happy carolers,
but you're actually collecting money for me.
Yeah, call it Christmas camouflage.
- That's a good one. - No, no, it's...
I was just about to say that, so...
Thank you.
Here's a list of the people you'll be collecting money from.
Protect that iPad with your lives.
Think of it as a bribery menu.
Hey, so...
Does your mother have any new friends I should know about?
- Really? - You know, the type of friends
that might take her for meals
and put their arms around her while watching Black-ish.
Oh, you mean like Roger?
- Um, do you have a green... - No, no, no.
Did you say Roger? Who's Roger?
He wears a fur coat and has tiny eyes,
but still looks like Bruno Mars.
Yeah, well, Roger sounds like a real jerk.
Roger's my hamster, Dad.
You messing with me of all people?
You doing the dishes tonight, you know that, right?
♪ Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree ♪
Dad, come look at this!
Isn't that nice?
They sound like a bunch of wounded ducks.
Baby, I gotta go next door and feed the Mannings' cat.
They're in Cancun.
- You wanna come? - I would but Gabriel and Taniya
are doing a routine.
Okay, well, I'll be right back.
- Don't go anywhere. - Be nice to Pudding Foots.
Or she won't come out of her hiding place.
Her name's Pudding Foots, I'm a grown man,
- I'mma call her cat. - That's a cute name!
I can't believe you let him steal the iPad.
Are we sure it's even in there?
Of course it's in there. We tracked it here.
- Alright, let's go in there and get it. - Wait, who is that?
I dunno, kinda looks like John Legend.
Pudding Foots.
Oh, Pudding Foots.
Here, kitty, kitty.
Cat! Where you at?
If my name was Pudding Foots, I'd hide too.
Where you at?
I knew I should've started CrossFit after Thanksgiving.
Mm-hmm, I got those hippo hips.
Got the baboon butt. Now, look at me, I'm stuck.
Excuse me, do you mind telling me what you're doing in my neighbor's chimney?
- Can you see me? - Yeah, I can see you.
What am I doing here, uh...
I'm just... I'm just hanging out, you know?
Doing an impersonation of a bat.
If the bat was Prince. You know, the singer.
- So we call him Prince bat. - I have no idea what you're talking about.
But you gotta go, you in a lot of trouble but I'mma get you out.
- That'll be blissful. - You ready? One, two...
- Three!
Wow, I was really stuck in there.
It's not because I gained weight, you know?
Anywho, can we forget all about this?
Can we not tell nobody about me trapped in the chimney?
Plus, I got a long night ahead.
I got things to do, as you can see. Excuse me.
Excuse... Hey, do you hear me talking to you?
Hey, that's not your fridge.
I mean, seriously?
Simple dictums, tainted, traditional, time-honored customs.
What?
Capers?
So they got capers but no bagels, no lox.
- No green onion shmears? - What are you doing?
I'm looking for cookies and milk.
And they don't have either.
They don't have neither... either.
I've never been clear on the difference between neither and either, are you?
Neither matters right now because it seems
as if you've broken into my neighbor's home.
Now, you seem a little confused.
Are you confused?
- Now, do you mind if I frisk you? - Whoa, whoa, Hands McGee, okay?
- Are you the police? - No.
But I work with the police.
If I can be honest with you, you don't really look like you work for the cops.
You look like you sell copy machines to people who don't want copy machines.
- Bang.
Official. You see that?
- Atlanta Police. - I can barely see that.
Thought I left my glasses in the sleigh.
Oh, they're right here.
- In the sleigh? - Yep, I have a sleigh.
That's not obvious?
- Sleigh? - Okay, maybe this will jog your memory.
"He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
"and away they all flew like the down of a thistle."
S... Stop! Stop talking.
What are you doing in my neighbor's house?
I am here to drop off gifts to the Mannings.
You know the Mannings?
Of course, they're on vacation right now in Cancun, right?
They're about to come back with these embarrassing cornrows
which is really weird to see, but it is what it is.
Look, I've had a long night, I had a mishap at another client's house
and I'm over here having another mishap with another client.
Just a little fun fact about me, I call them clients.
Excuse me. I got stuff to do, gifts to give.
Hey.
My man, you gotta stop.
Alright, I'm gonna frisk you just to be safe.
You know something? Have at it, frisk away.
Now, watch out, though, I'm ticklish.
- Turn around. - Alright.
You know, going around the globe, giving out gifts,
no creatures stirring, not even a...
What is this?
Those are carrots.
Those are apparently my snacks.
The missus said I need to eat healthier so she decided to give me carrots.
She thinks this will wean me off the cookies.
Hasn't worked so far.
This is sad.
- What's your name? - My name is Nicholas Sinter-Claus.
Nicholas Sinter-Claus?
I'll slow it down for you.
Sinter...
Claus.
Sinter-Claus.
Oh, like Santa Claus.
- Yes! - That's cute.
Wow, that was like pulling teeth.
- And what's that for? - This is my naughty and nice list.
An iPad?
That's right, we've modernized it by still keeping it traditional.
If I can get this thing unlocked.
Wait...
I can't unlock it.
Somebody else must've did the face recognition.
Try your face. Okay, your face don't work.
Well...
Looks like I'm gonna have to freestyle.
Oh, man, am I behind.
If I don't make it back for sunrise yoga, Mrs. Claus is gonna be mad.
- She loves my flexibility. - So, we'll get you looked at
and then we'll talk about things from there.
- Oh no, I gotta call the boss. - No, I will call the boss.
Dad, is everything okay?
Everything is fine, I just need to take this nice man here to the doctor.
I'm gonna call your mom and tell her to come get you.
What? Now?
I know, it's just that this man really needs help, okay?
Umm, hey, how you doing?
Your name is Charlotte, right?
- How do you know her name? - Yes, who are you?
Come on, when you see all this, you can't tell who I am?
- What about the white beard? - Yeah.
Don't you think if you gonna claim to be Santa,
that you should include his signature attribute?
Okay, look, the whole white beard thing is a myth.
Started by the Scandinavians.
As soon as they said I had a big white beard and a little curly mustache,
everybody believed it.
Okay, fine, I dyed it, alright? I'm going through a midlife crisis.
I am 1,462 years old.
If I wanna look younger for at least three years, I deserve that.
So, you're Santa, huh? When were you born?
A lot of questions, little Oprah.
- I was born in 200 AD. - And where?
- Alright, uh, Anatolia. - What's Anatolia?
And you're Gayle, too.
Anatolia is what Turkey is now.
You speak pretty good English for a guy who was born in Turkey.
I'm very diverse.
I speak 172 languages and dialects.
Baby, I'mma take you home first, alright?
And then I'll deal with Mr. Sinter...
Nick.
You know something, I do need help.
Luring my reindeer.
The reindeer.
How do you do that?
Now, Prancer has separation anxiety,
and Dancer hasn't been eating well.
Yeah, he's got somebody with him.
So, what do you want us to do?
Dr. Galoshes said it could be a stomach flu, I don't know.
- Dr. Galoshes? - Yeah, Dr. Galoshes.
Dr. Galoshes is the best penguin doctor in the North Pole.
And see, it's not because he treats penguins,
it's because he's a penguin that's actually a doctor.
Now, check this out.
This little clicker is powered by Christmas spirit.
Look at the sky right now.
What you're about to witness is a sleigh being pulled
by eight bold and beautiful reindeer.
Must have mis-paired the Bluetooth.
Baby, as you can see, this guy definitely needs some help, okay?
He's trying to call reindeer out of the sky.
I'm gonna drop you off first and take this man where he needs to go.
You know something, I definitely need to be checked out.
I'll check on these reindeer later, you know?
Yeah, we should do that.
Like I've been saying.
What?
Santa fun fact number two,
- I sweat glitter.
That is so cool!
Here we are...
Comet, Vixen...
Bro, you doing way too much.
- You know my friend, David Banks? - Yeah?
His dad said that Santa is Black.
They just changed all the history books.
First of all, I love little Davie Banks.
He is having an amazing year,
that's one kid who won't be getting cauliflower this year.
- Cauliflower? - Yeah, we phased out coal a few years ago
'cause of the whole ecological, you know, stuff going on.
Burning coal, there's a lot of it.
So, if you're naughty, you get a lump of cauliflower in your stocking.
Dad, he is really Santa!
My real name is Nicholas Sinter-Claus.
Hyphenated, Santo.
You know, I took Mrs. Claus' last name.
We're progressive up there, you gotta move with the times.
But I also got a few nicknames, we got K Cringe, we got S Clau,
we got Ro-ho-ho.
Oh, my favorite, Gifty McPresents.
The Third.
Okay, so, if you're really Santa Claus,
then tell me what Charlotte wants for Christmas.
First of all, she wants a Rise Up, Sing Out t-shirt, right?
Number two, she wants the Anna and Elsa dolls,
'cause she loves Frozen.
She wants a pretend make-up kit
and lastly, she wants a pink scooter.
He's right! Oh my gosh, see Dad?
I've never met an eight-year-old girl that did not want a pretend make-up set.
Eddie, would you happen to have some cookies
or other affiliated baked goods?
I'd take a Girl Scout cookie, a vanilla wafer,
I'd do oatmeal raisin, I just need a cookie.
Oh and look, I got a doctor's note right here
that says I can have the snacks.
Let me guess, from a penguin?
No, from my other doctor, Dr. Buttons.
Look, I'm sorry for the penmanship. Dr. Buttons is a cat that paints.
- W... Where did you get this? - My secret Santa pocket.
I checked all your pockets.
Yeah, that's why it's called a secret pocket.
I keep all types of things in there.
I got reindeer food in there, uh, I keep yak repellent.
Oh, I got tinsel, like, removers,
a little brush, you knock the tinsel right off, comes off easily.
Also, do you understand that I'm missing work right now?
This is the first time in thousands of years.
I've never missed a night.
Sorry, Nick, my dad sort of hates Christmas.
That's okay, Charlotte, he has his reasons.
Hey, what are you talking about, I have my reasons?
What does that mean?
Eddie, I know everything.
I know everything, that's not just like a slogan.
- No, it is a fact. - I'm sorry, wait, wait.
What's that smell? Do y'all smell that?
- What is that? - What smell?
I don't know, it kinda smells like... Like cinnamon.
That would be me.
- What would be you? - Santa fun fact, it's number three.
Santa farts smell like cinnamon.
- I'm sorry, what?
Oh, there he is.
- Pull over.
- What? - Pull over!
No.
What are they, nuts?
Oh no!
- Man, who are they? - It looks like a snowman and an elf...
And a nutcracker, AKA every Tuesday at my house.
Are you kidding me? Go!
- Oh... Oh no!
I think we lost them.
- Are you okay, baby? - Yeah.
What was that?
Man, you know people get crazy on Christmas Eve.
- This stuff happens all the time. - Come on, come on.
No, no, don't do this to me now.
Unbelievable.
- Hello? - We lost him.
How is that possible?
I don't know, it's been a long night, sir.
- You know what else is long, Mary? - What's that?
- Prison sentences. - Oh, Congressman...
But let's not torture ourselves thinking about what can happen to us
if that thing falls into the wrong hands.
My house is a wreck!
- I know, I'm sorry, sir. - Bologna soup.
Fish patties. Turkey-fried turkey.
These are some of the things they serve in prison.
Which is where we will end up if you don't find that iPad.
Hold on a moment.
A few of my constituents are here.
♪ Glory to God ♪
- We'll get them, sir. - Shut up.
♪ O come let us adore Him ♪
♪ Christ the Lord ♪
Find him, find him, find him, you have the capability.
Bring me that Santa Claus!
Hold on, okay? I'm gonna call a cab.
Just gimme a second, we'll be okay.
♪ O'er the fields we go ♪
You have a phone? Mine's picking up some weird signal.
I don't need a cell phone. If I need to message somebody,
all I gotta do is call my flock of puffins.
Check this out.
Puffins!
Ka-ka-ka-ka!
P... Puffins?
You know something, I forgot.
I gave them the holidays off.
This is what I'm gonna go, I'mma take you down to Atlanta PD.
See, I got a friend named Bobby Carlotta.
I went to high school with him, now he's a detective
and he can get you to the hospital, get you the help that you need.
Simple as that.
Then you and I, Baby Girl, we can go to your mom's and wait.
I can't believe she's still out shopping.
Oh, she loves last-minute shopping.
Which is fine by me. Shop, mamma, shop!
Ooh, I love that. Shop, mamma, shop.
- Shop, mamma, shop! - Shop, mamma, shop!
- Please don't stop. - Please don't stop.
- Go to all the stores. - By them gifts galore.
Shop, mamma, shop!
- Wow, that was fun. - Y'all make such a great little team.
- She's amazing. - I love it. Um...
When I bring you in, I'mma do you a little solid, okay?
When I talk to Bobby, I won't mention the breaking and entering.
Okay? I'm just gonna let him know that you might be an individual
that is going through a bit of a crisis.
- And needs an evaluation. - Mm-hmm.
You get where I'm coming from?
- Oh, I got you. - Okay.
But you know who you need to help?
Bobby Carlotta, your classmate.
Loves Union Pacific train sets, that's right.
I've given him one every Christmas.
But he doesn't want nobody in the precinct to know
that he loves to sit at home and play with train sets.
Got me?
Yeah, got you.
Just like you're a grown man acting like Santa.
Kinda like that?
- Anything? - No, we lost him.
Oh, wait, there he is. We got him.
- Where? - Up here, make a left at the light.
Hey, how's it going?
- I'm just checking on y'all. - Listen, she is having a ball.
Oh, really? Well, that is amazing.
Well, I was hoping that maybe once you drop her off,
we could have a drink, 'cause I found this really cute recipe
for peppermintinis where you coat the glass
with crushed candy cane and...
Wow, that definitely sounds great.
- We might be just a little late. - Wait, why?
Um...
Daddy-daughter fun times, just like you said.
Daddy-daughter fun time. [chuckles]
Okay, well, I'm finishing up this last-minute shopping
and I'll see you soon for peppermintinis.
Yeah, can't wait.
Okay, bye.
We really need to get home.
Mom and Dad are separated, they see a therapist.
- Charlotte. - It's nothing to be embarrassed about.
Therapy's a good thing. Me and Mrs. Claus see a therapist too.
Let me guess, another penguin?
No, our therapist is not a penguin, Eddie.
He's a walrus.
That's right, Arturio Tuskanini.
- Tuskanini? - Mm-hmm. Dr. Arturio Tuskanini.
Look, Eddie, me and the missus have rough patches too.
We've been married for centuries.
- Every couple has problems. - Centuries...
So, what's triggering you?
Hey, that's really none of your business.
I would like to know too.
Why don't you and Mom get along?
Hey, hey, we get along just fine.
It's just sometimes, people, they... they stop fitting together.
Alright?
I will admit, I...
I don't like when she gets sad either.
I think that there's some things about tonight we can just leave out.
I mean, like us being downtown.
- Gotta dash. - Nick!
Nick!
We got you!
- Come on, Charlotte. - What about his bag?
Don't worry about it, this man needs our help.
Let's go.
Okay, listen baby, whatever you do, do not let go of my hand.
Don't worry, I'll protect you.
There's too many of them.
Oh, sorry.
Hey-hey!
Where is your outfit?
My bad, my bad.
♪ Don we now our gay apparel ♪
This place is great!
This is definitely a recurring nightmare I've had.
Let's hurry up and find him so we can get out of here.
♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪
Let's go.
♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪
♪ Strike the harp and join the chorus ♪
♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪
♪ Follow me in merry measure ♪
♪ Fa la la, la la la, la la la ♪
♪ While I tell of Yuletide treasure ♪
♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪
Alright, everybody, let's keep things going.
We got a special guest for you, he's got an oldie but goodie
he wants to sing, I know you gonna like it.
- Do you see him? - I see lots of him.
I can't tell them apart.
♪ Out of all the reindeer, you are the mastermind ♪
♪ The mastermind ♪
♪ Run, run, Rudolph, Randolph ain't too far behind ♪
♪ So run, run, Rudolph ♪
♪ Santa's gotta make it to town ♪
♪ Make it to town Make it to town ♪
Excuse me.
♪ Santa make him hurry, tell him he can take the freeway down ♪
No!
♪ I'm reeling like a merry-go-round ♪
♪ Said Santa to a boy, Child, what have you been longing for? ♪
Come on, Dad.
♪ All I want for Christmas is a rock-n-roll electric guitar ♪
♪ And away went Rudolph Whizzing like a shooting star ♪
Coming through.
Out the way, out the way.
Hey Nick. Hey, hey, Nick!
Hey, Nick, it's Charlotte!
Oh, hey, Charlotte, come on up here. She's good.
- Hey, hey, man, what are you doing? - What you got? Show me what you got.
That's my daughter, bro. What you doing?
Okay, okay, that's impressive.
But let me show you what we do at the North Pole.
Check this out, this here's called the North Pole shimmy.
- That's right. - Ooh! Yeah!
- Baby, hey! - Dad, come on up.
Yeah, yeah, he's good.
- Baby, what're you doing? - Just do what I do.
Have a little fun! The North Pole shimmy.
Oh, come on.
Good job!
Hey, Eddie and Charlotte, why don't we get up out of here?
Yeah!
Wow!
Dad, watch this!
- No... - I'm literally flying!
... go, man.
Yeah!
How come none of y'all caught me?
♪ Make it to town, make it to town ♪
Go, go!
When is this night gonna be over?
He couldn't have gone too far.
Can't we just let him go?
Baby, I want to let him go and get you home to your mom,
- but I just can't, okay? - Why?
Because the most important part of Daddy's job
is to never let someone who feels sad and alone
keep on feeling sad and alone, okay?
I don't think he feels sad and alone.
I actually think he's one of the jolliest people I've ever met.
And that's because you're too young to understand.
No I am not!
You just don't like him because he's Santa Claus
and you hate Christmas.
He's not Santa Claus because there's no such thing...
Let's get you home.
Something we should've done a long time ago.
Look, Dad!
Remember, he sweats glitter.
Nick, that was so cool, you were incredible!
Oh, thank you!
I would say I missed you, but it's only been, like 10 minutes.
Hello, Edward.
You mind telling me what that was back there?
You mean that amazing performance? I had so much fun.
I never pass up an open mic.
I can do any genre, too. I can do R&B, I can do jazz...
Yeah, I'm not talking about the little performance,
I'm talking about you jumping out of a moving cab.
- Who were you running from? - Oh, that.
That was nothing. Charlotte, check this out.
They really got it right.
- So, is this how the North Pole really is? - It is.
They even depicted the candy cane department.
That looks amazing but...
Hmm, the only thing missing is Ms. Paloma Sharp.
Who's she?
She invented the candy cane.
So, her dad was really old, really elderly, right?
And he broke his ankles, so she created crutches out of caramel
but they really wasn't sturdy, so...
So instead of crutches, she gave him a cane.
- That's right, they called it the... - Candy cane!
Can I have a word with you for a second, please?
You can have a whole paragraph if you want to.
Okay, listen, I'm trying to be as compassionate as I can be.
I wanna help you, but you gotta stop messing with my kid's head.
She's a sweet girl who's just overly trusting
with this wild imagination.
Let me get this straight,
you don't think that's great characteristics for a person to have?
Not if it's gonna set her up for disappointment.
Life is hard and as her father, I have to protect her.
You understand?
Yeah.
I understand that you need a puppy for Christmas.
- That's right. - A puppy?
- Mm-hmm. - I don't want a puppy for Christmas.
Oh, yes, you do 'cause puppies are loving
and soft and when you're mad, they just knock down the walls with love.
Love is like a bulldozer...
Bulldozer is a perfect name for a puppy!
Yeah!
I don't want a puppy named Bulldozer for Christmas!
- I want you to have a puppy, Dad. - Char, please...
- Nick! - Come on.
- Nick!
Wait. Nick. Nick!
Listen, I know in your world you don't like to give straight answers,
but who is that following us?
I don't know, I really don't.
But what I do know is there's two billion children all over the world
expecting me to deliver Christmas gifts tonight.
Whatever, fine, but we need to call an Uber, okay?
Maybe my phone is working again...
I bedazzled it. You're welcome.
- When did you do this?
I did it in the cab while we were being chased by those bad guys.
Don't bling anything else of mine, or else.
- Do you hear me?
Saint Nick! Hello!
- Nick, where you going? - Our ride is here.
Dad, our ride is here!
What ride, what're y'all...
Hey, hey!
Hey! Hey!
What are you doing?
These people 'bout to take us to safety and there's room for us all.
- Charlotte, come on. - Hey, hey.
We are not getting in a van with strangers.
Oh, Eddie, they're not strangers.
I know exactly who they are.
- See, he knows who they are. - There!
Come on, Eddie, time's a-wastin', we gotta get out of here.
- Come on, get in. Yes!
- It is really you? - Yep, it's me in the flesh.
This is a dream come true. It's incredible.
- And he's in our van. - Where'd you get those boots?
This is unbelievable!
- Santa. - I know!
I'm sorry, can you take us to the Atlanta Police Department?
- 1045 Young Boulevard. - Absolutely not.
We're the Truckles. I'm Sonia, that's Kayleigh,
and Diego and up here at the wheel is Martin.
Holly jolly, Señor Claus.
Holly jolly it is.
Let me tell you, I am so happy to meet y'all.
What? I thought you knew them.
I do know who they are. They are my fans.
- The biggest fans. - Number one.
- Ever. - Super fans!
I love it!
- Truckle gang, give me an H. - H!
- Give me an O. - O!
That's the flow, now run that back for me three times, what do ya get?
Ho-ho-ho!
We do Christmas!
- Oh my God, okay.
- Honey, please. Keep us safe. - Holly jolly.
- We are not gonna crash tonight. - Not with our precious cargo.
And the kids.
Yeah, okay, you do Christmas, but what's your job?
What do you do for a living?
- We're the Santa Seekers. - The Santa Seekers?
- We seek Santa. - Whoa, whoa...
So I'm looking at all this equipment here.
- This is how you found me? - Yeah.
- I made all this. - Our Kayleigh is a whizz
with the computer stuff.
Every Christmas, Kayleigh hacks
into NORAD systems so we can track on our own.
We discovered Santa was just a few blocks away from where we were.
At Tommy Tom-Tom's All Night Greek eating our traditional Christmas Spanakopeeta.
Spanakopita, honey.
Tommy Tom-Tom's!
On Elm Street, that's right, Tommy wanted
a kebab slicer for Christmas and a vertical broiler
because his old one's pretty much broken.
- Those get really hot, too. - That's the Santa Signature.
- See how it moves as we move? - That's so neat!
Sorry, does anybody have a phone? I need to call the police.
- And mine is, uh... - What happened to it?
He happened to it.
Guilty as charged.
- It's beautiful. - Amazing.
Please do not encourage him.
Oh, this is the perfect time
for my "Songs for when I finally find Santa" Spotify playlist.
- No, you don't have to do that for us. - Yes, hit it, Kayleigh!
No, no, don't do that. There's no need.
Tell us something about the reindeer that no one knows.
Well, check this out, here's a little known Santa fun fact number four.
- Come on. - We know reindeer love to fly.
But they have other skillsets like they're good at giftwrapping,
they can make pasta from scratch.
Matter of fact, they make a mean pot roast.
The meat comes off the bone!
But, what they're most skilled at is protecting Santa Claus.
That's right, they all got a bunch of special skills.
So if you mess with Santa, you messing with the reindeer.
- Really? Wow. - Oh, and another one.
They do not like Christmas music.
No way.
Matter of fact, their favorite song is the theme from Rocky.
- Who doesn't? - That's ludicrous.
It's true. Well, this is my stop.
Not again. What's up with this guy?
The turtle dove has flown the coop, honey.
The partridge left the pear tree.
Hey, listen, did we offend Saint Nicholas with all of our questions?
Char, come on.
Listen, I already told you, he's not Saint Nicholas, okay?
- Of course he is. - Of course he is.
Buddy, 1045 Young Boulevard, I'll take you there.
- We're good, just keep doing Christmas... - Don't slam the door.
You just made the naughty list.
I can't believe he just jumped out of the van.
Dad, aren't we going to find Nick?
Nah, I think maybe you were right. Maybe we just let him go.
I mean, if he wants to keep playing Santa all night, let him play.
It's not like he's hurting anybody.
What about you saying the most important part of your job
was to never let someone who was feeling sad and alone
keep on feeling sad and alone?
What about you saying he was the jolliest person ever?
- Remember that, huh? - I just think he might need our help, Dad.
Whether he's Santa or not.
Come on, Dad!
Nick.
- What is going on? - Look, I recognized the neighborhood.
And I was like, wait a minute, I got some associates here.
So I figured we go in, you call your police
and I get some supplies.
Who is it?
- It's me, Boss Tinsel. - Oh my God, Nick?
Come on, Dad, can't we just go inside
and use the phone to get him the help he needs?
These associates of yours, they better not make any trouble.
Oh, come on, my associates don't make trouble.
- My associates make toys. - Dad, come on!
He said they make toys.
Okay, look Eddie, I get it, right? You don't believe I am who I am.
Fine.
But let me show you something that'll completely change your mind.
Come with me.
♪ On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me ♪
Yo, Nick!
St. Nick's here!
♪ Ten lords a-leaping ♪
♪ Nine ladies dancing ♪
♪ Eight maids a-milking ♪
♪ Seven swans a-swimming ♪
♪ Six geese a-laying ♪
What up? It is Christmas.
I mean, the most magical time of the year, Eddie.
I get it, you're a doubter, you don't believe in anything.
But I ran into my fair share of doubters in my time.
But once I show them this wonderful workshop full of toys,
everybody's converted, check this out.
I mean, when you see all these toys, your mind is gonna be blown.
Um, Nick, where are all the toys?
Yeah, Nick, where are all the toys?
Yes, the toys.
You know what, the elves, the elves took it on the road
because it's already Christmas morning in Australia.
Or maybe Christmas afternoon.
Maybe Christmas evening. I'm not really good at time zones.
You would think I would be, but I'm terrible.
You know, Gerald and Lucille will explain everything.
Let's go inside and meet the crew.
There he is, my man.
Sorry skip, we finished the work early so we started the party.
Of course you did, that explains why there's no toys.
Hello, Nick. And who is this cuteness?
This little pepper right here is Charlotte and that's her father, Eddie.
Eddie's a non-believer.
Really? Oh, Claustrophobic.
- I'm sorry, what? - Claustrophobic, fear of Santa Claus.
I'm just gonna ask one more time.
- What is this place? - Look here, Eddie.
There are two billion families in over 160 countries
that celebrate Christmas.
Yeah, so?
At an average of 1.8 children per household,
Nick here delivers gifts to a bazillion kids.
- A bazillion? - It's crazy, right?
Yeah, that is. It's not the only thing crazy.
Look, I can't produce all those toys at the No' Po' like that.
- So, I outsource. - That's right.
With satellite operations in every city.
- Did you say No' Po'? - Yes, the North Pole.
Oh, Lucille, please tell me you have some cookies.
I got a test for the quest and found out that my blood sugar was pretty low.
So, I need some cookies.
Do I have some cookies? Of course!
- Yes! - To the kitchen, for some cookies.
Dad, cookies!
Gerald and Lucille, y'all outdid yourselves this Christmas.
Look at these Christmas cookies!
All this deliciousness.
Now, I'm only supposed to have two cookies, but I might cheat today.
But if I cheat, I gotta call my weight coach, Dr. Parnis
and Dr. Parnis is a lemming so if he hears the bad news...
- He might jump off a cliff? - Exactly.
Oh, Charlotte, look how beautiful these cookies are.
Hey, would you like to cookie up?
- Dad, can I cookie up? - No.
- What even is that? - I'm glad you asked.
See, what you do is you grab one of these freshly baked cookies
and you put it towards your mouth like this and then you...
Cookie up, y'all.
Mmm.
It's just eating cookies, I don't see...
Listen, do you have a phone that I could use, please?
Mm-hmm. It's right over there.
Bet you've never seen one of these before.
- Hello? - Alli, it's me.
Hi. Where are you guys?
Where are we?
You were supposed to have her home by 8:30.
Listen, we'll be home soon, we just got a little sidetracked.
Sidetracked?
- No, no, we're gonna be home soon. - Where are you guys?
Um... we're downtown.
At this time of night? What are you doing downtown?
Where is Charlotte?
She's right here by me. It's a work thing.
Oh my gosh, you actually found a way to go to work tonight.
- No, no, it's not like that. - It was one night, Eddie.
I can understand you maybe disappointing me.
- But to disappoint Charlotte? - Disappoint?
She is having the time of her life. Hold on, lemme let you talk to her.
Tell your mom that you're good and safe and not disappointed.
- Tell her. - Hi, Mom.
- Baby, hi. Are you okay? - We're with Santa Claus...
And he has a penguin doctor and he sweats glitter.
And there's these people, Lucille and Gerald
and they aren't actually elves...
Oh, okay.
Okay, put your father back on the phone, please.
- Everything's fine, I told you. - Bring my child home.
- I will. - And you know what?
- You can forget about the peppermintinis. - Alright, I got you.
Problem here is that you've got some brandy fruitcake crumbs
in the transmitter circuit.
But technically, I don't see anything wrong.
So, how'd you end up hanging out with this dude?
Look, the night... The night started pretty normal.
You know, I was getting all my out-of-towners out the way,
visiting all the homes of the folks who are away, right?
The Harf family was supposed to be in Florida, West Palm.
Or so I thought.
Here's a list of the people you'll be collecting money from.
What I didn't realize was I was about to interrupt a crooked congressman
who was being bribed to shut down the Moonlight Mission.
Password is 4273.
It's my name, Harf.
Oh, one of the stops is the homeless shelter
that you did the candle-lighting ceremony at this morning.
That's right, the Moonlight Mission.
Mr. Marty Plaseck is going to pay me to get his hands on that land.
Yeah, but, what's he want with a homeless shelter?
He's gonna tear it down to build a tire store.
What can I say? I'm a bad guy.
Yeah, this guy was a real carbuncle.
♪ What you gonna get her for Christmas? ♪
Anyway, I put on my jams like I always do for the out-of-townies.
♪ Look here Santa Claus here's the deal ♪
♪ I'mma go to the club on Christmas Eve ♪
♪ And when I come home I wanna see This underneath my Christmas tree ♪
♪ Wit dat big booty girl you left for me Stockings on da fireplace ♪
♪ Some of that egg nog alizzae ♪
Hello?
Excuse me?
You can see me?
Yes.
Um...
- What are you doing here?
What am I doing... this is my house.
This is your house?
Oh, you know something?
I'm with the gas company.
Dressed as Santa?
B... Because we are... We're rebranding.
We're trying to be more family-friendly.
We've decided to dress according to the season, so, you know,
on Easter, I am an Easter bunny.
Halloween, I'm Dracula, the old-school version
with the v-neck hairstyle and the fangs.
It's all about the children growing up 'cause they're the future bill payers.
And because of that, the children are the future!
Ow!
Ah!
Alright, that's it! Ah!
Yes.
Hope you and your friends like cauliflower.
Get him!
And ever since, these goons have been chasing me.
Wow, you gotta be kidding me.
You put me and my daughter through this terrible night
all for some bungled burglary?
Eddie, look, it wasn't some bungling burglary.
All this time, I thought you really needed help.
I thought you had real issues.
Come to find out you're just a common crook!
Okay, whoa, take it easy, fella.
- He doesn't mean that. - Of course I mean it.
So, that's who they were, huh? The people that tried to run us over.
The ones that's been chasing us all night.
- Is that who you tried to rob? - He didn't rob anybody.
Zip it, Willy Wonka.
Hey, hey, hey, bring it down. That's the total opposite of me, okay?
I'm a leaver, not a taker.
All the charades this whole night, all of the games.
Over! The whole night. Let's go, baby.
You are not gonna take away everything.
Everything. Even the cookies.
- No! - Yes.
Yes!
Yes! Exactly what I was looking for.
- The night is not over yet. - It's all fixed.
Thank you.
Bobby, this whole night is just out of control.
It's been a complete nightmare!
Yeah, you need the address?
- Don't do this, Dad. - Charlotte, please.
- No. - 259 Perry Street.
Atlanta, Georgia, 30316.
Alright, everybody, this has been real.
But I'm shutting the circus down.
I'mma get everybody the help that they need.
That means you, ladies, stop dancing. Moulin Rouge is over.
Would you like some Christmas caroler caramel confection?
- Where's Nick? - On the roof retrieving the reindeer.
Gerald is seeing him out because Nick has to deliver the gifts tonight.
Oh, he asked me to give you this.
Gerald, thanks for everything, especially the cookies.
I'll be out your hair in a minute, okay?
Anything for you, Nick, you know that.
- Hopefully this thing works. - It should work.
You know something, Gerald, I know exactly why it's not working.
It's not working 'cause Eddie doesn't believe.
Nick!
The fun is over. That's it.
You got to stop with this ridiculous show.
- Wow, you really are a non-believer. - Enough. Please don't start with that.
- And you're an old-fashioned thinker. - Bro, you own a fax machine.
And a rotary payphone.
Okay, everyone, let's be nice and cooperative.
You know, a whole bunch of people are gonna wake up tomorrow
to discover Christmas is canceled.
- That's on you. - I'll have to own that.
You know why? 'Cause I actually prefer Thanksgiving a lot better.
Let's go, sir.
- What do we do now? - We improvise.
We'll put out an All Units on that SUV
but without a license number, it's gonna be tricky.
If you could just hold him until Atlanta PD can bring full charges
so I can get Charlotte home to her mother I would greatly appreciate it.
I don't think you're gonna have to wait.
We got a call about 10 minutes after yours.
Eddie, this is detectives Jack Finer and Zachary Strome.
- Nice to meet you. - With the DeKalb County warrants division.
Turns out your perp's wanted in connection with a whole spate of B&E's up there.
It's time for Ron to face the music.
- Ron? - Ron Campbell.
AKA the chimney thief.
- He have any personal items? - Just this.
What's that?
That's the reindeer clicker.
Eddie, what's going on?
What's going on is you're not Santa Claus.
You're Ron Campbell.
A burglar from Atlanta.
- But you knew that, right? - I have a bunch of aliases,
and that's not one of them.
Sometimes I go by Victor Van Vitch, you got Freddy Cougar.
Mellencamp, that's a good one, or my new favorite,
Lil Baby Claus.
All the rappers got Lil and Baby in their names,
so I thought I'd try it too.
Please don't make this more difficult than it has to be.
Eddie, listen to me.
These men are not who they say they are.
That's it, Nick.
Next time, come up with a better story
'cause there's no such thing as penguin doctors
and reindeer who like to fight to movie themes.
There's only honest people and dishonest people.
And you know which one you are, right?
You really don't believe.
Nick, where are you going?
Honestly, I don't even know.
Take care of your dad, okay, Charlotte?
So long.
- Little Bobby Carlotta. - Mm-hmm.
No train set for you this Christmas.
I've given you 35 of them.
Play with the old ones.
No choo-choo for you!
No idea what he's talking about.
Dad, don't let them take Nick.
Charlotte, he was being untruthful.
Lying to us the whole night.
Okay? He's not Santa Claus.
I could actually use a snack, I'm a little hungry.
Can we stop so I can get some cookies or something?
Where is it?
- The tablet. - I knew it!
I knew y'all were bad guys.
I had a feeling, right?
I'm supposed to know, it's part of my job.
- To know who's naughty or nice... - Shut up!
Where is the tablet?
Well, I usually keep the tablet in my secret Santa pocket,
but guess what, it's not in there.
Right, right.
You're welcome for us doing your job.
- Did you get it? - No.
It's gonna take come persuading. Harf is at the mayor's Christmas party.
See you there.
Yo, Eddie.
Found this in your guy's cell.
He didn't have it when he was being processed.
Yeah, he has this thing where he makes stuff disappear somehow.
I can't figure out how he does it.
- Think you could get me an Uber? - Yeah, I got you.
- I owe you. - Yeah, you do.
Harf.
H-A-R-F.
Oh, I can't believe it was that easy.
Oh, wow.
What?
Can you believe this is how they've been tracking us?
- The iPad? - Yes, these are very bad people, Char.
Doing very bad things.
Anyone smell cinnamon?
You know, feelers out there, and if...
Excuse me, gentlemen.
Oh my God, he's even trying to shut down the Moonlight Mission.
A Christmas tree is like a pair...
Can you believe that?
He stands out there popping off about all the good things
he's gonna do to that place.
Dad, look, those are the guys who took Nick.
We need to help him.
He may be different than who we thought he was, Dad,
but he's not a bad person.
Okay.
I'll call my guy, Bobby, at the station and let him know, okay?
I gotta un-bedazzle this phone somehow.
- What's that? - Remember, Lucille gave it to me.
Said it was from Nick. Let me see.
Dear Santa, instead of toys this year,
I would like my parents to not fight so much
and to not get a divorce.
They are Theo and Brenda Garrick.
I have an idea for you.
My dad wants a collapsible fishing rod.
He loves to fish.
He catches bass and trout and shad,
so if you could bring him the rod and he thinks it's from my mom,
everyone would be happy.
Thanks and safe travels this Christmas Eve.
Your friend, Eddie Garrick.
We do have to help him.
- We do? - Yes, we do.
- But we don't know how to find him. - Look!
- Gimme an H, gimme an O... - You're the smartest girl I know.
Alright, if you don't want a bad rating, change of plan.
New address.
Whoa.
Hey, bud, you haven't touched your chicken.
Oh, honey, don't be disappointed.
I get it, Santa jumped out the back of our van
but at least we got to meet him.
And he knew who we were.
He knew who we were, he knew who you were.
We need your help.
- Oh, hey. - What's going on?
- Oh, you. - What do you need our help for?
- To find Nick. - Alright.
Damn this thing!
Tony, how many times I tell you, huh? How many times?
We need to get a new machine.
I can't work like this.
Where is he now?
He's right here!
- Right where? - Uptown.
- Uptown where? - Looks like the mayor's mansion.
- Then that's where we have to go. - What for?
To save Santa Claus!
Somebody wants to do Christmas.
No, no, no...
Okay, let's just go.
- What do we do? - We do Christmas!
♪ It's Christmas time and we got the spirit ♪
♪ Jack Frost chillin', the hawk is out And that's what Christmas is all about ♪
Wow, is that snow?
We haven't had snow on Christmas Eve in maybe 30 years.
Not maybe. It's been exactly 30 years.
♪ We wanna say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year ♪
- Where's he at now? - Just outside the mansion.
- Are you okay, honey? - Two months worth of CrossFit, honey.
- Alright.
- Be careful. - I got this.
Dad, I wanna go with you.
Not a chance, you stay here. You guys keep an eye on her, okay?
Eddie, don't forget this.
Hey, Eddie!
- Huh? - Do Christmas.
Yeah.
Here's what I'm thinking, I'm thinking you brought me here
to get the naughty and nice list, of course,
but it's not the naughty and nice list 'cause you already have that.
So, when you're done with the list, just give it back to me
so I can finish my deliveries for the night.
- Hello.
Let me see him.
Where's my tablet?
Like I told your associates, I don't know what you're talking about.
You were in my house looking for it.
- Who do you work for? - That's been a debate for generations.
You know? Some people think I work for Mother Nature,
or Father Time,
and recently everybody thinks I work for Beyoncé.
But no, every married man would understand this.
I work for Mrs. Claus.
Mrs. Claus is running everything, whatever she tells me to do,
that is what I do.
As soon as I get out of this event,
you and I are going to have a little discussion
and I'm not going to lie, it will be painful for you.
- Mary? - Yes, sir.
I'll meet you at the place next to the thing
and we will get this information out of him.
Copy that, boss.
- Let's get this over with.
It's probably the boss to clear up where the place by the thing is.
- Good, 'cause I had no idea. - Yeah, boss?
♪ Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪
♪ Jingle Bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪
Where'd he go, where'd he go?
Nick!
Go get him!
Hey, Eddie, how you doing?
What is going on in there?
Guess they heard one too many Christmas songs.
Looks like it's wearing off now, let's get out of here.
Claus! Right there.
Get him!
Madam Mayor.
What a lovely party.
Thank you so much, Conrad, that's so nice of you.
Now, what do you want?
What're you doing here?
- I came here for you. - What do you mean you...
- Did the Truckles track me here? - Yeah, they did.
You know what? I love that family.
Look, there's one more thing I gotta tell you, but...
Let's just get out of here. I'll tell you later.
They can't guard him
and I'm the loud soccer mom.
I'm sorry, excuse me, Madam Mayor, just a moment.
They got away.
You know, those bad guys are after my naughty and nice list.
- Oh, macaroons. - Yes, I know.
Harf is a congressman on the House of Appropriations Committee.
He's been accepting bribes and he's basically using it
like his own private piggy bank.
Those are a lot of words.
Come on, come on, man.
So, the tablet that you took
contains a list of all the pay-offs he intends to collect tonight.
You believe that, Eddie?
Stop!
- You okay, boss? You look tired.
Where's my tablet?
Like I said, I don't know.
Look, Santa, I have no problem destroying this...
for every kid in America.
Oh, sorry.
He thinks I'm just local, no, I'm...
I'm global.
Okay.
- What about you? - What about me?
What's your involvement in all of this?
I'm just Santa's helper, that's it.
Eddie, did you just say...
- Did you just say that out loud? - Don't do that.
That you're Santa's helper.
- You've come such a long way, Eddie. - Don't...
Y'all heard that!
He said he's Santa's helper!
- Alright. - That is partnership!
Okay, okay, alright, alright.
Okay, don't go too far.
- Calm down. - What is happening here?
How can these two rob us,
outfox us, outrun us?
These two!
Man, you are not Santa Claus.
And you, you're not whoever it is you think you are.
Why you messin' with me? I didn't do anything.
Take them to the spot and use everything we learned
on Google on how to extract information
from those who don't want information extracted from them.
Yes, Conrad Harf!
When you were nine years old, you wanted the Action Arthur ninja doll.
With the kung fu grip... Yes you did, yes you did.
- Yes you did. - I don't know what you're talking...
about.
It had the little button in the back and the foot and the arm would come up.
The right foot and the left hand and it would do a karate thing.
But you wanted it. It was tricky, we couldn't get it
because the gingerbread men decided to go on a strike.
I know you really wanted that action doll and I'm sorry I couldn't get it for you.
But it all makes sense now
which is why you probably got this weird origin villain story right now.
Shut up!
You guys take care of this.
I got it.
Give me this.
Very good.
- Now... - Eddie, you gotta believe.
- Believe and magic happens. - What shall we do about these two?
- What is that? - Little known Santa fact number four.
Reindeer can do more than just fly.
They're great at gift wrapping, making pasta from scratch,
and protecting Santa against anybody that messes with him.
Eddie, open your eyes.
Man, where have they been all night?
They've just been circling the sky waiting on you.
Just waiting on you to have faith.
♪ Don't call it a comeback I been here for years ♪
♪ I'm rocking my peers Putting suckas in fear ♪
♪ Making the tears Rain down like a monsoon ♪
♪ Listen to the bass go boom ♪
Turn those lights off!
Please, no!
♪ I'm gonna knock you out ♪
♪ Mama said knock you out ♪
♪ Don't you never ever pull my lever ♪
♪ 'Cause I explode ♪
Aww.
♪ I'm gonna knock you out ♪
- How long will I be up here? - It's what you get.
Mommy!
- You see the reindeer? - Yeah!
- You wanna go pet them? - Mm-hmm.
Hi!
You're so fluffy.
Good job.
I missed you so much, great job tonight, ladies.
Alright, let's get out of here.
Hey, Nick.
- You're forgetting something.
Can't forget this.
Thank you.
Hey.
You know, this whole time you've been trying to get me to believe in you.
I want you to know that
I wouldn't have got there if you didn't believe in me first.
Look, Eddie, I would love to take the credit for this, but...
It wasn't about me believing in you.
You know who truly believed in you to make all this happen?
That amazing little girl right over there.
Can you smile for me?
Hi!
So, are these your brothers or your sisters, or... ?
Look, Eddie,
all I wanna do is have you start believing again.
Like you once did, you know?
When eight-year-old Eddie
thought that a fishing rod would solve all of his problems.
You know, things aren't so bad, Nick.
Things aren't so bad at all.
Oh, before I forget.
Could you give this to Harf for me?
- Got it. - Tell him it's from Santa.
Bye, Nick!
You really pulled out all the stops this year, Madam Mayor.
He's on the move!
So, my dad pressed the reindeer clicker, right?
And that called the reindeer.
Are you getting this? Should I start over?
Everything you need to know about the crooked congressman
and his three stooges is on there, alright?
Harf, before you go...
- He wanted you to have this. - What is it?
- Guess you gotta open it and see.
No... No...
Action Arthur! Action Arthur!
I'm a good boy now!
- Hi-yah! Hi-yah! - Yeah, okay...
- Get him in. - Action Arthur, officer!
Action Arthur.
Maybe he really was Santa.
I told you the entire time.
He's magic!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Aren't you guys a little old to be believing in Santa Claus?
I'm 42.
Hello? Nick! You okay?
You got it, brother.
We are back, people! We are back!
Merry Christmas!
One, two, three... We saved Christmas!
Alright, let's roll.
Time to keep on trucking.
It's okay, Dad, you'll do great.
Are you okay? Oh!
- I'm fine, we had the best night. - Where were you?
I know you're not gonna believe me, but we were with Santa Claus.
Okay, you know what, Eddie? Now is not the time to mess with me.
No, no, baby, we were. We were with Santa Claus.
I promise. Charlotte, you gonna leave me out to dry?
- Back me up. - Mom, Dad's telling the truth.
We were!
Now you've enlisted our 8-year-old daughter
to go along with your shenanigans?
No, I would never do that, I'm telling you.
Just listen for a second.
What was that?
What are y'all looking at?
What are you doing here?
See, I knew your story wouldn't fly, so, I decided to help you out a bit.
Yeah, it crashed right into the ocean.
- Hi. - Hi.
You're the Santa Claus...
Yes, I am The Santa Claus.
Okay, well...
What's up with the hombre beard?
He dyed it because of his midlife crisis.
You, you... This is all quite unbelievable.
You know what's unbelievable?
The look on your seven-year-old face
when you got your Mr. and Mrs. Seahorse family playset.
You were so excited to have that.
You didn't think you'd get a gift that year because...
My dad had lost his job.
I don't remember telling you about that.
You didn't, that's what I'm saying.
This is what I've been dealing with all night.
Okay, goodnight.
Wait, don't leave just yet.
Eddie here has something he wants to tell you.
- I do? - He knows what you are thinking.
I know what you're thinking, so you gonna say it.
You gonna say it.
- Yes, I do, I do. - He does.
- There you go, go ahead, do your thing. - I... I'm going.
Okay, gimme some space.
Okay.
- Allison... - Allison...
You know something?
I'll be over here.
Allison, I think I've always been afraid.
Ever since I was eight years old, I've been terrified
because on Christmas, my parents split up.
So, when Charlotte turned eight, it just all came flooding back.
And I figured it's safer to, as you say, detach.
But that's not being safe, I know.
That's just being afraid.
Now I realize none of that makes any sense.
Not when you have something that you really believe in.
And for me, that's you.
And my beautiful daughter, Charlotte.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that
you two are my Christmas.
Every day of the year.
And I love you.
It took your buddy, Santa, to help you figure out all of this?
He did a little bit, yes. I'll give him a little credit.
Man, you gonna make me cry.
So, what did you think?
About what I said?
I think...
- It was alright. - What?
I think I like it.
Santa, why is your bag moving?
I'm glad you asked. I got a surprise for you.
Say hello to Bulldozer.
No.
No, no, no.
Hello, Bulldozer.
No, no, we do not need a dog, okay?
Yes we do.
We need a dog.
If I'd known 30 years ago, we could've saved your dad...
I'm so glad you agree, baby.
Charlotte, look.
Christmas magic.
You're the man, Santa.
Look at this big boy.
My work here is done.
Thank you.
Alright, Garricks.
Have a Merry Christmas.
- Whoa. - Whoa.
Are we expecting someone else?
Hey, guys, you wanna come in and meet Bulldozer?
- Absolutely. - Absolutely.
Look, oh my...
Alright, ladies, we got a long night to go.
And a lot of catching up to do.
Santa!
Bye, Santa!
♪ Your beard's as white as snow ♪
♪ Your gifts can warm the cold ♪
♪ You know everything I need You're alright, you're alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright You're alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright ♪
♪ Making sure your list is right Flying through the freezing night ♪
♪ Before the smiles come morning time ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright You're alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright, you're alright with me ♪
♪ You made me believe again ♪
♪ I feel like a kid again ♪
♪ Yeah, you made me believe again ♪
♪ Oh, I feel like a kid again ♪
♪ Your beard's as white as snow Your gifts can warm the cold ♪
♪ You know everything I need You're alright, you're alright with me ♪
♪ Alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright, you're alright with me ♪
♪ Making sure your list is right Flying through the freezing night ♪
♪ Before the smiles come morning time ♪
♪ Ooh, you're alright You're alright with me ♪
♪ You're alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright You're alright with me ♪
♪ You made me believe again ♪
♪ I feel like a kid again ♪
♪ You made me believe again ♪
♪ I feel like a kid again Oh, Santa, you're alright ♪
♪ You're alright with me ♪
♪ Whoo, Santa, you're alright You're alright with me ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright ♪
♪ Santa, you're alright with me ♪
♪ Oh, Santa, you're alright ♪
♪ You're alright with me, ow! ♪