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Hello, police?
There's been a shooting in the museum. Send someone, please.
Okay. We'll take care of it.
Dispatch, all units to the museum.
- There's been a shooting at the museum. - We're on it.
Say again. Where was it?
Let go of me! My friend's in there!
I'll let you go, asshole.
Guys, what the hell?
Where did you find him?
At the crime scene. Who are you?
- If you want to talk to me, take it off. - Okay.
- You know what happened? - No.
See? Neither do I. But he does.
So be a peach and watch him while we look around.
Okay, guys. Wrap it up. Dempsey and Makepeace, take over.
Funny guy.
Put him in their car.
No, I don't wanna. You'll mess up my uniform.
I'll mess up your face.
MUSEUM MASSACRE
How does this sound?
"He struggled helplessly in the iron grip of the SWAT team."
Awesome.
Mr. Angalai, you like it?
What do you mean?
I'm not just a cop, see? I'm also a writer.
Something I could've read?
- I don't wanna brag-- - You do!
I wrote a book of some success, and I'm working on another.
I see.
They only write about us Gypsies in the papers.
And mostly just bad things.
Can we turn the siren on?
No. We do that only when the law allows it.
Right. And what if I wrote this:
"The SWAT team mercilessly and ruthlessly--"
Don't just stand there. Shut the door.
Yes, sir.
Hey. Hey!
Get back inside.
- But I-- - Sit right there.
- Here? - There.
So, when will you beat me?
We should apologize for the SWAT team.
It's okay. They were just doing their job.
Have some, Gabo. You mind if I call you Gabo?
That's my name.
May I have a smoke?
No smoking in here.
What happened at the museum?
I don't know. I wasn't even there.
Mr. Angalai, we found you there.
You are our only witness.
You wouldn't believe me anyway.
Try us.
And record.
Not that one. The red circle.
Like that.
It all started with a manhole cover.
Bro, help me.
Man, that's heavy.
- At least 50 kilos. - Might even be a hundred.
- Shut up. - You shut up.
Moron.
- Hold him. - I'll knock him the fuck out!
Let's go, or we'll get it too.
The boys took it home.
To clean it, you know?
Gabo, you sure they weren't stealing it?
What for? They're good boys, mostly.
And they put it back.
- That's when we found him-- - All right. Please focus.
Forget the cover. What happened in the museum?
- But I'm trying-- - No.
No, we're the ones asking the questions here.
So let's start with Ladislav Hundel.
- Hunder. - Der? Hunder?
Lacko? He's my best friend.
A great man. He's just got a short fuse.
But he can repair anything, so he can't be a bad person.
Now this, and...
The city's a mess.
Public money is being stolen, key people are incompetent.
And Gypsies, they roam free.
We need to tidy up.
That's right.
Give me four years.
One term is all I need.
If in four years, our hero, General Milan R. Štefánik,
created our republic, then I...
What the f--
I do it for the people...
Marky, can you turn it down?
Marky! Turn it down, please!
- Turn it down! - Lacko, don't yell again.
Me? I'm quiet all day.
- His stereo yells like crazy. - Your TV is also really loud.
But I'm working, my dear.
If you'd rather fix my sewing machine...
Damn it. I told you some things can't be fixed. Period.
This thing too. It's all fucked up.
Anything can be fixed. You just need to try.
Lunch is almost ready.
So what?
We should have lunch as a family.
We each do our part. You cook, and I work, okay?
Turn it off! Turn it off!
Stop yelling!
You know what's yelling? This is yelling!
This is yelling!
Turn it off!
You crazy?
One's not enough!
Who do you think you are?
Mom, Dad's losing it again! Come get that psycho!
- You do as I say. - Fuck you.
Fuck who?
See? This is your fault. You know how he'll end up?
Don't worry. I'll be a break dancer.
You're not a dancer. You're just a prancer.
Who will pay you for spasming like that?
Anything is better than being a janitor.
You shithead! I'll kill you!
Are you insane?
Do we have to live like this?
Go get him!
- He'll be back. - Shut up!
You bring our son back right now, or I will never speak to you again.
Never!
And then she told him, "I will never speak to you again. Never!"
Lacko is still very sorry about it.
But that happens in a family. Even with you white people.
Mr. Angalai, you're starting to piss me off.
That also happens.
My colleague is trying to say,
we're not really interested in the family issues of Mr. Hunder.
But he asked about him.
But how does that have anything to do with the museum?
Well, Lacko works at the museum.
He rode there on a bike, and he was great at cycling.
And he had a great bike. I'm surprised no one stole it.
He always came to work, at the museum, on time.
And he knew how to fix everything.
Really everything. He knew all the tricks.
Thanks.
They have great stuff at the museum. Even from the Winnetou era.
Twenty-five taxidermy animals.
And now we move to the greatest Slovak hero,
Milan Rastislav Štefánik.
Kids, your teacher told me you learned about him.
So, what can you tell me?
Excuse me, do those guns actually fire?
No, don't worry. Nobody's going to fire these.
It would require a lot of work.
But let's go back to Milan Rastislav Štefánik.
Kids, did you know this is his actual hat?
Mr. Hunder? I knew it was you.
Do you have a lot to do today?
Don't get electrocuted.
That would be a miracle since it's unplugged.
You know these things better than me.
That's why I need your handy hands.
Can't you see I'm busy?
You'll do this in no time. This is easy-peasy, a tiny little thing.
Oh, my, a BR-18. I know how to fix this.
- Cogs and gears. - Yes, it has cogs.
- It's my grandson's. - I see that.
He did something.
Dropped it, I don't know. Now it rattles and doesn't work.
It's the rotor or the axle.
- Can you fix it? - I just said I can.
Because he's upset.
I spanked his butt. But that's educational sometimes, right?
You think you can bribe him?
You'd be surprised how well it works. And not just with kids.
That's also broken?
It's cherry pie. It'll fix you.
It's not easy working on an empty stomach.
I have to go now. We have two more schools.
It's a full house today.
- That's really fascinating. - Watch out for pits.
- I know how eating works. - And I didn't see that beer.
I'm Eduard Kot. Independent mayor candidate.
Vote number five.
I'll get this city back on its feet. I'll end the corruption.
You can trust me. I am not a politician.
I'm working for the people, with competence, decency and honesty.
I bring a solution for the Gypsy problem.
Gypsies must obey the law like everyone else.
The city votes number five.
I'm the other mayoral candidate...
Hello, Zdena. It's me.
Is Marek home? Zdena?
Zdena?
Zdena!
Zdena, stop playing this stupid game! I can hear you breathing!
Laci, can you help me?
Can't you see I'm busy?
Lacko was always eager to help anyone.
Mr. Angalai, please focus.
Why was Mr. Hunder at the museum that night?
Because they stole his family.
Hi.
What's with the luggage?
What?
What's for dinner?
What?
You wanna starve me to death?
Zdena, where's my dinner?
WHERE'S MAREK?
How should I know?
Are you dumb? You had a stroke or what?
We're not even talking anymore?
GOING TO MY SISTER'S.
Are you crazy?
Zdena?
Zdena.
She slammed the door and left.
And Lacko ended up all alone.
Gabo, stop.
If his wife left, it's his own fault.
But he wanted to fix everything.
Mr. Angalai, I am begging you.
Tell us step-by-step. What did Mr. Hunder do?
First, he took a newspaper.
Then he found the ad to buy a new stereo.
Hello, I'd like a stereo for my son.
Sold already? I see.
Okay, never mind. I understand. Bye.
Hello, this is Hunder.
Yes, I heard that. I need a big one. 150 Watts is not enough.
Cut the crap. Got the stereo?
No? Bye-bye.
Good evening. It's Hunder.
I'm very interested in your stereo for my son.
A good boy. I love him.
Hello? Hunder. I need sound. Stereo. Got the right number?
HOME VIDEO RENTALS
You got it? Great!
I'll come and pick it up.
What do you mean when? Right away.
Okay, thanks. See you.
We do the shoot, you do the tapes. Deal?
Give me Honza, please.
Hey, man. It's all set.
See you in Prague, bro.
- Hello. - What?
It's about the ad.
But the shoot is tomorrow.
And I wouldn't even use you as an extra.
You're selling a stereo, right?
The stereo. Why didn't you say so? Got the dough?
- What? - Cash.
The money? I do.
- Awesome. - Have it on me.
Great. A friend has the stereo. I'll take you there.
- But you drive me home. - First class, bro.
And where are we going?
To the community.
No way, man. Ain't dealing with Gypsies. Can't stand 'em.
No, man, no Gypsies. It's a garden community.
You look like a gardener yourself. Plums, apples...
Anything liquid, right?
Sometimes I drink a glass. Or two.
- Final destination, boss. Get out. - What?
You're here about the stereo.
- Where is it? - Come on, man. Come.
Got the money?
Sure.
Give it to me. I'll count it.
The ad said Hi-Fi stereo
with a CD changer, massive speakers, great sound.
This is some cheap shit. What the hell?
- You don't like it? - No way.
But it's top stuff from East Germany.
They call it die bombe.
Listen to this.
What are you doing?
That's not the stereo.
It's him.
- It's him! - Wait, I'll switch stations. Watch.
- Loveliest place in the world - Amazing sound.
- Is my homeland - You think I'm retarded?
You do?
I tell you what, boys.
You either cough up a stereo
worthy of my son,
or give me my money back.
You think I'll shit myself?
Well, you'd better.
Get lost.
- Take a walk. - I will sue you and you and you.
- Say what? - Don't touch me.
- Get out of here. - Fucking snitch.
- Walk. - Get off me.
- He's yelling at me. What the fuck? - You fucking illiterate!
- What? - You think you're Mr. Music, you clown?
- Away! - I'll cut you!
- Come get me! - Come on!
- Hold him! - Knock him the fuck out.
Okay. Get rid of him.
So Hunder trashed his son's stereo, his wife left him.
He wanted to make up.
He found the ad. He got the money.
That's right.
But he got tricked and dumped into a sewer.
He was fucking lucky someone found him.
Who found him anyway?
We did. I tried to tell you.
- You did? When? - When you interrupted me.
Anicka, my sister, kindly asked us to take the cover back.
Am I not doing enough? Don't I cook enough? Is it not enough?
We only borrowed it.
I'll borrow you one!
Holy Mary, can you see? Why me?
We're sorry.
And speak Slovak! I told you a hundred times!
- Hi, Gabo. - Hi, Gabo.
Anicka, what's this?
I told you to watch them.
- I did. - Liar!
You'll return it right now. And no dinner for you.
But it's dark outside.
You know where it's dark?
In jail. So scram!
Go! Now!
Come on. Move it.
Why don't you carry it?
Wasn't too heavy when you stole it.
Ouch, my feet.
It's easy for you. I'm the one carrying it.
Sure, kid.
Stop complaining.
And move faster.
Where's the manhole?
Over there.
- You carried it this far? - We did.
You're crazy.
Someone's there.
It's just dark. No one is there.
- A white guy. - Let's run.
Stop.
He fell in because of you.
- We must help him. - All right.
Hold the flashlight.
He wouldn't have fallen in if you left the cover here.
We only borrowed it.
Sure. Borrowed my ass.
Shine the light.
You see what you did?
We're sorry.
Careful.
Hey, gadjo.
You alive? What happened?
Don't worry. We'll help you.
Hello.
Where am I?
A hospital with doctors.
You'll be fine.
You've just slept a few days.
What?
A few days? How many?
Well, I brought you in on Wednesday.
And today is?
I don't know. I'm not really keeping track.
And who are you?
Me? I'm Gabo.
I found you in a sewer.
When we were putting back a cover we sto-- I mean found.
And what do you want?
Nothing. I'm watching over you.
You were asleep. They could rob you.
There's all sorts of people.
A Gypsy watches over me.
I'll be damned.
Wait.
There's something wrong with my feet.
What about mine? People say they smell bad.
Wait,
I can't move my feet.
Oh, that. The doctor said so.
- Other than that, you're okay. - I can't--
- Morning, Mr. Hunder. - Can't move my legs.
- You look great! - Can't move my legs.
Can't move my legs!
- Calm down. - Fuck, I don't feel my legs!
- Help! - Calm down.
I can't feel my legs! I can't...
- Nurse Helga! - I can't move!
Move!
Those bastards.
That's the way, dear.
And stop yelling.
Mr. Hunder?
Lacko, you alive?
Mr. Varcovsky, you must breathe.
Is that all?
Based on the blood test,
your BAC was around 0.2 at the time of the accident.
How many times do I have to tell you, moron?
I was robbed and left for dead.
And you drank before or after?
After.
There was a cold one ready in the sewer, so I helped myself.
Lean into it, Simonka.
Up, down.
Easy but thorough. Okay, my dear?
Now I'll handle Hunder.
- You're still here? - We're done.
- Good-bye. - Bye.
Mr. Hunder, it's time.
Breathe in and out.
- You feel no pain? - None.
At least we'll take off this.
And we'll do the other side.
IT'S FOOD AND PAJAMAS
Zdeni, we need to talk.
I might never walk again.
Some things will be different, but we'll manage.
We'll fix it as a man and wife.
SOME THINGS CAN'T BE FIXED
Are you crazy?
You think you'll find someone better than me?
You'll never get rid of me! Forget it!
I'm your husband!
What-- What's this? Leave me alone.
I don't want this! No!
See? Quiet as a little lamb.
Pity I did not have those at home.
Do you want a few?
They kept Lacko there for a few weeks.
Mr. Angalai, let me explain as simply as possible
so even you can understand.
For us, the hospital means as little as the cover.
So please skip that.
What happened after the hospital?
Well, Zdenka brought him home.
And he tried to be nice, seeking forgiveness.
Watch it!
I meant, careful with the table.
You'll leave me here like this?
All alone, my feet on the table
Life doesn't hurt any more
All alone, my feet on the table
Even the bad things seem good
I kinda like it
But she left anyway, and Lacko was very sad.
I see. So Lacko was very sad.
- Yes. I still feel his sorrow. - Me too.
And then, Lacko finally went back to work.
He looked forward to it, but it was much harder
because his legs didn't work.
Stupid threshold.
Even the threshold to the door gave him problems.
Not to mention the elevator.
Invalids are like Gypsies.
Nobody cares about them.
You know how hard it is for an invalid to close a door?
So I told my boys to watch him, for his own safety.
Jesus. I can't stop. Holy Jesus, Mother Mary!
Ouch!
Gadjo is hurt.
- Hey, you okay? - Don't touch me!
And fuck off!
Stupid fucking legs.
Dear residents.
If you want to meet the new mayor, Eduard Kot,
please come to the main square at noon.
There will be presents.
I repeat. If you want to meet the new mayor, Eduard Kot...
Hey! My buddy!
That's the last person I need.
- They let you out? - What do you want?
- Brave soldier reporting for duty. - What for?
I'm here to help.
No help needed.
- I heard you fell over. - Heard where?
Gypsies know everything.
Now what?
I'll help.
- No, don't. Fuck! You want to kill me? - Watch out!
Stupid Gypsies!
Who's a Gypsy?
I am a Gypsy.
Can't you see he's disabled?
Shit. Are you trying to kill me?
I saved your life. I don't want to kill you.
I know you saved me.
And I fucking thank you for this fucked-up life!
Lacko, being this angry ain't right.
When I'm angry, I prefer to sing.
Chabaraba, chip chipó
Yeah, right. That's gonna help me. Chabaraba, chip chipó.
It helps me.
Damn, come here, you chabaraba, chipó.
I knew you'd need me.
- Friends must help each other. - Okay. Just move.
- Watch it. Christ. - And up we go.
Here comes Lightning Lacko.
Vlado, help me.
Can't you see I'm busy?
I see.
I'll let you touch it, but please be gentle.
You look great, Mr. Mayor.
How much is it worth?
For Slovaks, it's priceless. It's a national treasure.
It should represent the town, not sit in a dusty display.
- It's the crown jewel of this museum. - I thought that was you.
Mayor, you're so...
Mr. Hunder.
You're finally back.
Everything has been falling apart without you.
Mr. Mayor here came to see how we're doing
and how he could help.
Well, I will try to support you.
But quid pro quo.
I must go.
Please, there's one more thing...
BROKEN TOILET LIGHTS DON'T WORK
OIL HINGES CHECK DOORS
Shit! I hate this life.
Loading gears, sewing plate and engine. All busted.
Hello, Zdena. I would like to talk.
Zdena, you there?
Zdenka, darling, I would like to--
Zdenka?
Zdenka.
Zdena!
Fuck this.
Working on the sewing machine again?
No. I'm making an obstacle course.
Will it work?
I doubt it. I have no spare parts.
Why are you still here?
I fell asleep again.
I'll do one more round and head home. Bye.
Fuck! This isn't happening.
You don't have the right.
What do you even care about the Slovak national treasures?
You're not even Slovak.
I'm Russian but also Slovak.
This hat is a national treasure.
Don't yell at me. Who's the director? You or me?
I don't have time for this.
Please excuse, Mr. Bilko. He's just acting up.
And send my regards to the Mayor.
Hey, you. Stop.
- Hey, asshole. You hear me? - Mr. Hunder.
Stop right there!
Fucking wheelchair!
You gave Štefánik's hat to that prick?
Excuse me? He's the assistant of our mayor.
That cunt turned me into a cripple!
Your accident was your own fault.
Are you mental?
Mr. Hunder, you're an alcoholic. The police confirmed it.
That's how you ended up in that sewer.
And you should be grateful I let you work here.
Because a janitor who's unable to change a lightbulb
would hardly find work elsewhere.
Bitch.
Shit! Fuck!
Holy Mary, Lacko.
- What did you do? - What do you think?
I fell. Splattered like horse shit.
- Your arm's okay? - Wait. Get the chair.
Break your arms, and you're just a torso.
Wait. Don't smack me with it.
- Shit! - No more racing for you.
- Arms okay? - The hell if I know.
Dear God, what did you eat for lunch?
Fuck.
You in the seat?
How should I know? Can't feel anything from my ass cheeks down.
- And now? - All right. Shit.
You don't have to rip my balls off. We're off to the police station.
- Where? - To the police.
Oh, man. I forgot I have some work 'cause my cousin needs--
I said we're going to the police. Right now.
All right.
Why didn't you wait inside?
What were you doing there this late?
Jerking off.
God, you ask such stupid questions.
- You've been there a long time. - Well, I've got problems.
- My legs don't work, remember? - I see.
Lacko, I can't go any closer.
I'll give you a push, okay?
There's even a ramp. You can do it. That's great.
Really awesome.
I'll wait for you here.
Though I can't understand why someone would go to the cops willingly.
Evening. I want to report something.
What?
A simple thing. I was assaulted.
Go up to the second floor.
And how would I do that?
There's an elevator.
You're really Mr. Nice.
Hello?
Can someone help me?
Goddamn it.
Fucking elevator.
Fuck!
What's all this ruckus?
Citizen, why are you laying here?
Get up at once.
How am I supposed to stand if I can't even sit up?
You're drunk.
I'm disabled.
And your shitty elevator stole my wheelchair.
So the lift stole your wheelchair.
How about we wait for it?
Well, I guess it ate it, right?
You know what?
Screw you, you green dickhead!
- Mr. Hundert, first of all... - Hunder.
We'd like to apologize for our member on duty.
And if I beat the shit out of your member, would that be okay?
Mr. Hundert, my colleague was doing his job, and--
If you guys did your job, I would still be walking.
Mr. Hundert, I am aware you had an accident,
and there are some issues you'll have to live with
for the rest of your life.
What accident?
I was tricked by an ad.
They assaulted me and robbed me.
The guy who did it has Štefánik's hat.
He works for the mayor.
- I see, Mr. Hundert. - Hunder.
Drinking is not shameful.
Everybody does it occasionally.
Even I do. Off duty, of course.
It's only shameful if you don't admit it.
Are you out of your mind?
Call the video rental guy.
They call him Mr. Prague, or something.
And unleash your member on him.
And you'll see how quickly he spills the beans.
Mr. Hundert, for us, the case is closed.
You don't need us. You need medical help.
Tell you what, Mr. Hundert.
Rehab is relaxing. Like a spa.
I've been there myself. Twice.
And you're disabled?
Then the state can reimburse you.
I mean, maybe.
The world's gone mad. They beat whites now?
Even the disabled.
Unbelievable.
And where are we going, Lacko?
Home.
Oh, my. That sounds amazing.
Nice place. Lovely. Much like our community.
What do you really want from me?
Me? Nothing.
You just need help, and helping others is a good thing.
You're an imbecile.
So are you, Lacko. We're the same. We just have different shades.
Wait up, Bardos. Invalid coming through.
Mr. Hunder, what about my window?
We'll sort it out.
- I have a cousin who-- - Who're you?
I am Gabo Angalai. Like an angel.
Give him a break. He's here with me.
Piss off. We can't all fit.
If you're an angel, I'm a racer.
Right. Lightning Lacko.
How much do you pay for electricity?
'Cause you can avoid that. I have a cousin--
Don't drag anyone over here. I'm fine with paying.
But it's a nice place. With an elevator. You don't have to take the stairs.
Would be better if the damned kids didn't mess it up every day.
Maybe if you had a pulley out of your window,
you could pull yourself up.
- Got any sugar? - Up there.
Hand me that envelope.
Lacko.
- What is it? - A letter from Zdena.
Studenková?
My wife.
You live with Zdena Studenková?
Yes. Me and three others.
She wants a divorce.
Lacko, wanna watch TV?
My brother.
Brother.
Winnetou is great.
You know his horse's name is Ilchi?
It means wind.
Maybe you should name your wheelchair.
Tornado?
The natives are like us.
They even give us similar names.
Indi-ans. Cig-ans.
And they also have a hard time finding jobs.
What are you doing?
Thinking about your pulley idea.
Don't eat that.
If you pick it up in three seconds, it's okay.
You know what's great about these movies?
The evil always lose, and the good prevail.
Yeah. But in life, the biggest bastards win.
Got it?
A regular guy is just trash.
No matter what you do.
You can work your ass off or bend over backwards, and nothing.
Your ass stays poor.
And you're supposed to thank those up there for that.
Thanks for my poor ass.
Then you turn on the TV, and you see morons.
Those ministers, MPs, dickheads...
And you're supposed to respect them? For what? They live off of our money.
Mine, yours, everyone's. Holy shit, it pisses me off so much!
And if you make them do honest work for two hours, they fuck it up!
Fucking morons.
How did it come to this?
Even the mayor is a sodding mobster! Fuck!
'Cause we don't have Old Shatterhand.
He'd sort things out.
At full moon, we leave.
And we won't rest until we find the murderer.
Maybe all we really need is...
Lightning Lacko.
Psych tests for gun license owners DO NOT KNOCK
Mr. Hunder, no need to worry.
These tests are a standard procedure for future gun license owners.
It's just a formality to prevent unstable and aggressive people
from getting a weapon.
The written exam takes 60 minutes.
We'll be done in two hours.
You can start right away.
Damn it.
No idea.
B.
Come on.
Mr. Hunder, the results indicate that
you possesses traits of emotional instability
and dissociative traits characteristic for borderline personality disorder.
Right. That's me.
Do you have anger issues?
What the hell do you care?
Just give me that damn paper, and stop pissing me off!
Bastards! I've been there for two hours and now you throw me out?
Shove that paper up your ass!
What are you doing?
NATIONAL TREASURE STOLEN
The thief deserves a bullet.
One rifle, some powder, and problem solved.
NITER 75% - CHARCOAL 15% SULFUR ten%
New mayor is pacing ahead swiftly
and approved a hefty donation of 1,5 million crowns
for the city museum.
Culture deserves our attention.
My predecessors only invested in things that created a personal profit for them.
I am not like them.
Mayor declined to comment on allegations that he used his power
to appoint his friends into the city council
and cancel long-term winter maintenance contract
only to grant it to his friend's company.
Sorry, but I refuse to answer this question.
This wasn't the deal! Turn it off!
Once a thief, always a thief.
Reporting from...
Mrs. Hunder, evening. Please wait. Thank you.
- What brings you here? - I am going to get divorce papers.
I hope he signed them.
That's long overdue. He wasn't the man for you.
If you saw the company he brought home last night...
Well, that's none of my business.
I hope he won't cause you any more trouble.
Hopefully.
Whoa.
DIVORCE PAPERS
Zdeni.
Zdenka!
Lacko!
- Come on. - Coming.
Good evening.
Evening.
Got it, Lacko!
We're testing a pulley.
Park me here.
And the bottles we brought, put them over there. This one as well.
- There? - Yes. Up front.
Wait up.
- That's a beauty. - Isn't it?
Like Captain Flint's rifle.
Hold this.
Okay, good. Now plug your ears.
Holy crap.
That? Wait till you see what this baby can do.
Is it stronger?
You bet it's stronger.
Watch this.
Beautiful.
Saving the best for last.
- Number three? - Number three.
You're about to see something.
Ready.
Hold it. Right.
Holy shit! Let's run!
Hey, wait! Come get me!
Lacko, you're going mad.
Okay, so I overdid it a bit.
You're insane.
Insane, my ass. Shit happens, you know.
Gabo...
why didn't you report it?
Report what?
Mr. Angalai, didn't you find it suspicious that some guy was testing a museum rifle
on the outskirts of town?
It wasn't some guy. It was Lacko.
And he works at the museum.
But at night?
It's not his fault that he is so hardworking.
Mr. Inspector, may I eat that?
No.
I can't believe he's that stupid.
He's not stupid, just different. Like you.
On the other hand, what he says makes sense.
You're starting to catch on.
Hunder got beat up, ended as a cripple and wanted revenge.
He just needed a gun. He had loads of them at the museum. He had many choices.
And he was a custodian. A skillful one at that.
So fixing them up was child's play.
But I still think this theory is hanging on a hair.
I don't think that you have to worry about that anymore.
The police didn't listen.
And when a guy like him feels injustice, he does justice.
Lacko wanted revenge.
So he paid a visit to Mr. Prague.
It's done.
You'll shit bricks when you see what people do for money.
Right. See ya.
What? We don't do cripples.
You don't remember me?
Yeah, right. The East German porn freak?
We're closed. Roll in tomorrow.
Take a better look.
Oh, shit.
The stereo guy.
- Stay cool, will ya? - You made me a cripple.
Look on the bright side.
You roll wherever you go.
Now you'll give me the names of all the bastards who were there.
How about a new blockbuster instead?
It's called Speed. Got it right here. Almost like your biopic.
You'll shit yourself when you see it.
Mr. Prague didn't give his associates away?
No.
- But he found out anyway. - He did.
And how?
Shame you weren't paying attention.
Fortunately, I wrote it all down.
At least wipe that smirk off your face.
The car stopped near a derelict block of flats.
Detective got out.
Before his colleague clumsily lumbered out of the vehicle,
he surveyed the area.
Another night. Another murder.
- Stick to the facts. - Right.
Okay. Height, 175 cm. Weight around 75 kilograms.
Black hair, bondage clothing, with an empty fanny pack.
And yes, a bullet in the head, to which you said that...
he looks like a golem.
He looks like a golem.
Golem. That's good.
Keep it professional.
I'm just getting inspiration.
You're supposed to be here for investigation, not inspiration.
One day you'll thank me for writing it all down.
- What does that imbecile want here? - Crap.
Exactly.
Gentlemen...
what happened here?
A murder.
Maybe this bullshit was tolerated till now,
but things are changing.
See? He's nice.
And you thought he's an imbecile.
Names. Your names.
- I'm Dempsey and this is Makepeace. - Makepeace. Enchanté.
Dempsey and Makepeace, you're in deep shit.
Can I help you?
I thought I knew him.
And did you?
No.
I want a report by tomorrow.
You're through fucking around.
- You have his cell? - It's gone.
You gotta be fucking joking.
- This is a major fuck up. - Calm down.
All because of your stupid ads!
- I gave you a clear order! - You're not in charge anymore.
OLD VINARSKA STREET MIDNIGHT TOMORROW
What you doin'?
Training for the Paralympics.
Oh. Bravo.
What is this?
For your machine. Won't work without it.
The sewing machine?
My wife died, no kids. I don't need it.
Okay, thank you.
You're welcome.
Vlado...
I'm going home, and I'd like to take it.
Could you help me down the stairs?
No problem.
Hello, Zdeni.
SIGN IT!
Zdeni.
You were right.
Anything can be fixed if there's a will.
I realize that now.
And I'm trying to be a better man.
Trying to be better at things I might not be good at.
You know, for example,
to express my love.
Even though it's hard to see.
Maybe the love you can't see is the most beautiful.
But even the blind can love, right?
Just like I am trying to move a bit more, but I can't.
YOU STINK
Right. Classic me.
Got a new hobby, and I'm sweating a bit.
It's hard for me to take a shower.
But that's okay. Anything can be done somehow.
I sweat more by moving less.
Done.
And say hello to Marek.
Okay, I will tell you one more time and slowly so you can grasp it.
You know what you can do with this pocket money?
You'll screw this up for me.
You think you're better than us?
Pick it up.
- Sorry, boss. - Let's go.
What's a cripple doing here at midnight?
I think he's out for a jog.
- Go. - I won't run over a cripple, you maniac.
You'll free him from misery.
And what is he doing?
He's backpedaling.
- He's nuts. - Come on. Go.
What is that?
A trumpet.
Need backup at Vinarska Street. We're in pursuit...
of a man in a wheelchair.
Report it.
You report it.
Car six here.
The cripple got away.
You can't be serious.
Did you at least arrest Viktor?
Hunder played the sheriff, put himself above the law.
Shit, it's like a western shoot-out.
And during one night at the museum,
he did more for the city than you in your entire career.
He should be in jail.
So prove him guilty.
There's your witness.
So you don't care that your best buddy is a murderer?
Lacko is not a murderer. He's a good guy.
So great that if he sent me to hell, I'd enjoy the ride.
He made you an accomplice.
Their blood is on your hands too, Gabo.
Why do you call me Gabo?
Because that's your name, isn't it?
But to you, I'm Mr. Angalai.
He's yours. I don't have the nerve.
Seven dead men, Gabo.
That was self-defense.
Self-defense my ass!
So, why didn't you arrest him a long time ago?
'Cause he ran away.
Ran away?
But his legs don't work.
Just a minute.
Mr. Hunder, it's Detective Kaiser and Detective Fin.
Open the door. We need to talk.
Hunder, let us in.
I'm on the can.
What did he say? He's shitting?
Yeah, right.
He got away.
How? He flew out of the window on a wheelchair?
Pretty much, yeah.
Are you insane?
Don't even think about publishing this.
It's going into the report either way.
I retire in two years. You, in 30.
So think twice. Do you really want people to laugh at you
for letting a handicapped man get away?
Lacko Hunder knew damn well why we came after him.
Why are you telling him this?
You might as well put it into your book.
It's a shame there are no books about us Gypsies.
But that's not a bad idea.
My friend here could write one for you.
Really? And can Lacko be in it as well?
Of course. Sure.
Lacko can be in it. But you have to tell me more about him.
I will tell you all about him.
- Really? - Gypsies too. It's all related.
First, I took Lacko home to our community.
No one will find you here. Not even the police.
Hi, Leo.
So, ain't it nice here?
Couldn't be better.
See? And you were scared.
Gabo, who's this gadjo?
It's Lacko. He's my buddy.
Never saw a Gypsy with a gadjo friend,
but you've always been different.
This is where I live with my sister and her three kids.
Welcome to our home.
This is my library.
I've even got Winnetou.
But now I'm reading Švejk.
- You know Sandokan and Feri. - Hi.
They helped you out of the sewer.
And this is Tiffany.
She took after her mother. The best in her class.
Who's this?
Laci.
The sewer guy.
He just came to visit.
Why did you drag him here?
He's just visiting.
What are you hiding from?
She knows when people lie to her.
We had a small misunderstanding with the police.
We don't need any more problems. We've got enough of our own.
Anicka, just for a day.
I stayed at his place too.
Very well. But tomorrow he'll be gone.
Tidy it up. It's lunch time.
Great. I'll show you everything.
I'm not hungry.
You have to try this.
There's no cooking like home cooking.
I want some too.
You'll get a carrot.
Thanks.
- Why did he get some? - Eat quietly.
Because he's our guest!
- Why did he get? - Quiet!
Shanks are good for joints, and I can't walk.
Lacko, you shouldn't live alone.
I deserve nothing else.
I chased away my son.
My wife won't even speak to me. Went to live with her sister.
- Why did you chase him away? - 'Cause I'm an idiot.
I see.
We had a fight. He threw it in my face that I'm just a janitor.
I got so angry, I threw his stereo out the window.
That's nothing to be ashamed of.
I mean being a janitor.
A few years ago, it was an honor to work with your hands.
Now everyone treats me like a piece of shit.
Now everyone avoids me like the plague. You know how that feels?
You're telling me that?
Everything would be okay if I didn't have such a short fuse.
I even tell myself: Lacko, don't be mad.
But then it gets to me, and I get so angry!
See? Even now. Just talking about it and I'm mad already.
- I'm mentally unstable. - One more reason to try singing.
It helps me a lot. My favorite tune goes like this...
You're nuts.
If I had your legs, I'd catch it.
Come on. Add some voltage.
Same crazy moves as my son Marek.
Gabo thinks it's his fault.
What?
That you fell. That you are handicapped now.
That definitely wasn't his fault.
It was a different story.
Gabo is a good man.
Lacko, don't get him in trouble.
Tomorrow, I'll go to the police.
Or maybe I won't.
Hide me.
How's it going? Good?
Why are you here?
We already paid.
Just came for a friendly visit. You should be happy.
You can help me for a change.
I'm looking for someone.
- A gadjo in a wheelchair. - No one is here.
If he ain't here, he ain't.
Dzeko, get lost!
Don't tell me what to do, bitch.
Get off her!
Go away!
Hey, asshole! What do you want here, you Apache?
Oh.
Hello.
And you said he's not here.
I'm fed up with assholes like you.
You're only brave when you're armed. Alone, you'd shit your pants.
Bullshit.
Tell him to piss off.
Dzeko, it might be a good idea if you left.
Cut it short. Just tell him to scram.
I did. Just a bit more diplomatic, you know?
Listen up.
You're coming with me now, or I'll slash your tires.
You know what they say,
don't bring a knife to a gun fight.
Doesn't hurt.
Fuck this.
Are you insane? What have you done?
- He was just defending you. - Shut up! You brought him here!
I'll tell the police everything.
They'll never come, but Viktor will. And he's worse than a hundred devils!
Viktor's goons stole my family, made me a cripple.
And now you got them back? Or started walking?
No. But I will make sure it never happens to anyone else.
I'll end it all.
But first, I have to find something they stole and put it back.
Your boys could help me.
So, where did you go after that?
- To get that manhole cover. - Geez, the cover again.
Lacko had plans with it.
And then?
To city hall. The mayor's office.
Boys, you think you could get a funny hat from upstairs?
No problem.
Watch out. I'm coming.
Careful. Watch your step. Don't fall down.
This could be it.
The gadjo from TV.
Hold the light. I'll show him.
Yeah. Satanis. Let's go.
Lacko knew that he could set a trap with the hat.
For Viktor, the mayor and all his pals.
Just like Old Shatterhand.
Now stomp.
- Eh? - Stomp your foot.
A bit to the right. And a hard stomp.
- What do you say? - Wow.
- Great trick. - Years of practice.
Help me out here.
What are you looking at? Never been to a museum?
No.
Come here.
You've got nice stuff here.
Right? Come.
Open it.
Hand me the stuff.
I can't. We're in a museum.
Today you can. Go.
Today I can.
Nice.
I could really use something with a bigger punch.
This.
It's very much like you.
Sturdy on wheels and balls of steel.
Great.
You go take a look around. I will get ready.
- Take this as well. - Right.
That's stylish.
Well, today I can.
Great fabric.
Gabo?
What are you doing here?
I work here.
Bullshit. It's past midnight.
I fell asleep again.
Lacko.
Evening.
- Can I borrow this? - What the hell are you wearing?
A uniform.
Premium brand. For the battle.
What battle?
The battle for the museum.
So Hunder knew there will be a fight?
He knew they'd come for the hat.
- And Vladimir Bilko? - Who's that?
The late museum doorman.
Right. He spoke neither Slovak nor Romani, but he wanted to help.
Said his grandfather helped against the Germans.
Probably a football player.
Gabo, how did that battle for the museum unfold?
Like Lacko said.
First, we had to get ready.
What's that?
Family heirloom.
I wanted to give it to the museum, but we can use it better.
Who the fuck lost his mind at two a.m.?
Heard you're not dead yet.
What?
Fuck you, asshole.
The cripple awaits you at the museum.
You bald testicle.
You should have finished me off. Now you're finished.
- Fuck! - Stop yelling!
Shut up, faggot.
Kikinko is completely stressed. Look.
Oh, no. Sorry, Kiki, my darling dearest.
Get up. We have a job to do.
Gabo, now you'll head home.
I'm not leaving you, Lacko.
Gabo, this is between me and them. They stole my family.
I'm your family. Almost.
Gabo, if you want me to forgive you crippling me, go home right now.
So we're no longer friends?
Keep him safe.
Of course, we are.
- Good man. - You should also piss off.
You want to drive a Russian from the battle?
They're pissed off, Vlado.
And armed.
Good.
What's this? Are you crazy?
A cripple-killer army?
He killed Mr. Prague, then Kiksi,
- and he also got me. - Fuck Kiksi, and fuck Mr. Prague.
- You're playing soldiers here? - We're not playing.
That fucking torso killed my men.
Right. That bastard fucked them up.
Hold on. What did you say? Your men?
Those were my men, Viktor.
Do you hear the difference?
Your men.
I pay you.
I guess we disagree.
Put that walrus into the trunk.
Right. Let's see.
The men stormed in with the intent to kill...
but the hunters became the hunted.
Too feeble.
Stopped by the click of a lighter.
Welcome, boys.
What the fuck was that?
Should've been just a cripple.
Go around the back.
- Then there was that crater. - Right.
That was caused by the grenade launcher.
You think I can quote the poem Kill Them?
"Check thou thy steps,
for the places are sacred, wherever thou turnest."
- That's from The Daughter of Sláva. - Damn. You're right.
Anyway, Hunder gave them hell.
Some men tried the back door
and were welcomed by the Russian delegation,
Vladimir Bilko with a Degtyaryov DP.
In the main hall, the battle raged on.
And another thug became a history piece,
ended up in the display.
You fucker. I'll get your scalp.
- Karol is gone. - They're all gone.
Lojzo?
Not Lojzo!
You were into Lojzo?
I'll kill him!
It was a two-on-two, but they shot ten men worth of ammo.
I originally said 20, but ten seems a bit more reasonable.
What are you doing?
Vladimir Bilko ran out of patience and ammo,
but he fought on with the hammer and sickle.
You're hit.
It's but a scratch. Let's go.
They tried to reach the upper floor, inches away from escaping.
But you can't outrun a bullet.
Vlado!
Fucking shit.
Come out...
you chucklefuck.
Shit.
Missed me?
Where did he come from?
Well, I can explain that.
Open up!
I just felt bad for him in that trunk.
Anybody there?
Hello.
What in God's name happened here?
Who are these people?
We must call the cops and an ambulance.
Good idea.
I heard gunshots, so...
So you wanted to screw me over.
Screw me over.
I told you a hundred times to forget about those stupid ads.
We could have gone to a higher level and make a fortune, but no.
Not you.
Like a rabid dog, you bit the hand that fed you.
You can't fuck with me.
The cops were supposed to get you at the Old Vineyards.
But then your cripple friend from the ad showed up.
Now the secret service is involved. But I won't let them get to me.
I won't let anyone screw my chance!
No one! Not you or anyone else!
The mayor delivered a coup de grâce to Viktor.
He knows he has little time left.
He should leave and erase any traces leading to him,
the head of the local Mafia.
But he needed a smoke to calm down.
Little did he know, his opponent is still alive.
The bullets were no match for the manhole cover on his back.
He emerged from the dark in a kamikaze attack.
They both fell into the devastated museum.
Thus ends the story of a man in a wheelchair
who would most probably die were it not for, I can't believe this,
the stupid manhole cover he used to armor his chair.
What will happen to Lacko?
I think it was just self-defense.
And the mayor, the punko?
Punko Kot. That's good. I'll use that.
Mister Commissioner actually wrote his book.
The names are different, but that's how they usually do it.
Maybe they'll make a movie about it.
In the book, Lacko and Mr. Mayor die.
But in real life, it wasn't that bad.
The mayor went to have a sit-down.
But not in a wheelchair, but in prison.
And Lacko was never charged...
DISABLED MURDERER IN COURT
because it was self-defense.
LADISLAV H. IS NOT GUILTY
And in the end, I even taught him to manage his anger.
They won't come.
I knew exactly how this would end.
I'm good at complaining and swearing, but when it comes to my own faults...
Screw this.
I don't deserve them.
I'm a prick.
You're not.
They know you love them.
How could they when I never told them?
Even Grandpa deserves one.
You can tell them now.
Wow. Zdenka.
Please sit.
Gabo.
This is my friend, Gabo.
My pleasure.
This is Marek.
I'm having a soda. Don't even like beer anymore.
Can I get you something?
The menu, please.
And can you please turn down the music a bit?
Can't do that. The boss wants it that way.
Okay. Then can you please call him?
He's not here.
Okay but, since he's not here, can't you just turn it down?
We just want to talk to each other.
Then go talk outside.
What? I'm your customer. I came here to talk.
I'd do it or he'll throw your stereo out of the window.
Shut up, punk.
Leave my family out of this.
- I asked politely. - Shut your face.
I'll shut yours, you redneck asshole!
- You want a piece of me? - Bring it!
- Get the hell out! - No way!
Stop! Now!
We're the customers, so you turn it the fuck down.
Okay. You want a lower volume, you'll get a lower volume.
Zdenka,
you really caught me by surprise.
Thank you.
Turn it up. I can't hear a thing over there.
Customers complained.
Hey, this is a repast.
Who are you calling a retard, you cow?
Cow? I'm an engineer. I have a diploma. Tell them, Ivan.
Paulinka, leave this to me.
Ivan, sit down and shut up.
- Who started this? - That cripple.
Have you heard him?
Get up, prick.
- Shut up. - I said get up.
- I'll show you a repast! - Hey, leave him alone.
This isn't normal.
I thought we'd be able to talk here.
You will never eat here again.
What did you say? I'll smack you.
Lacko, what did I tell you?
When you get mad, sing a little tune or remember your favorite song.
I will. Otherwise I'll explode.
Flowers bloom in the valley That which gives us love
Super song.
Its dark morning glow shines like dawn
The valley's honey More fragrant than the meadow
Lacko finally did it.
He learned to ride the anger wheel and control it.
Try it for yourselves.
In the valley, a person protects himself
Every tree, every meadow is a rare remedy
In the valley, people have no walls
Their hearts are clean And kind like a river
A countryside guarded By mountains and warm valleys
When the sun sings upon Herds of spring sheep
That's the countryside Where the morning wakes early
And the wood from the mountains Silently unites
It's the magic of Slovakia That I love with pride