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Are you gonna paint, or are you just gonna
sit there staring at the sky all day?
I'm waitin' on the right conditions.
Only a depressive loser like you
would stare at a blue sky and hope for clouds.
It's a study of the light.
Clouds are more interestin'.
Well, can you come help me
with the garden while you wait?
Yeah, I'm not eatin' anything
that comes outta there.
Why not?
Just 'cause you read about plants
on the internet for an hour
does not make you an actual gardener.
Your basil from last week tasted like chlorine.
Oh, so you'd rather eat food that comes out
of a meat printer in orbit somewhere?
Yeah. Lesser of two evils.
Okay, there's somethin'.
Also, Mom looked upset.
Did something happen while you guys were out job hunting?
She's just tired.
Did she find anything?
She will.
Now, plant your vegetables. I'm tryin' to focus.
You're kiddin' me.
Thought this one was headin' east.
Yeah, I think it's a different one.
Hey, park somewhere else!
People live down here!
Some of you may not be
old enough to remember it,
but life before First Contact was extremely difficult.
Nearly every human had to waste
most of their lives working,
and without our technology,
you could only produce basic commodities
by slowly destroying your own habitat.
Now, maybe we should have intervened earlier,
but our scouting fleet had been watching you
since the year you call 1953.
And if we'd learned anything about your species,
it's that you weren't always so quick
to embrace outsiders.
But when we finally landed our ships
and introduced ourselves
five years ago today,
well, sure, a few of you thought we were funny-looking,
and some of your governments
did their best to keep us out...
...but your most forward-thinking
business leaders saw the opportunities we brought
for wealth-creation and industrial efficiency.
- And humankind
finally joined the rest of the universe
in a new era of prosperity.
That's it for today's lesson.
Once again, my name is...
And I look forward to getting to know all of you better.
You may now remove your nodes.
So, yeah.
There's your new curriculum.
No more English Lit.
From now on, you'll be learning
Vuvv Culture and History.
And yes, that, um, thing,
it's gonna be your new teacher now.
- Save it, please.
Apparently, my microscopic salary
is too much of a burden on the school.
I have been underbid
by the little boxes on your foreheads.
So congratulations, folks.
You're finally rid of me.
...please come to the office.
You know, you really captured his essence.
I'm thinkin' maybe... maybe his face
could use a little more detail, though.
See?
The resemblance.
It's like a photograph.
Exactly.
You're new here?
Just started today.
Yeah, I noticed.
You're in my home room. Mr. Stanley's.
The hologram formerly known as Mr. Stanley.
I'm Adam.
Chloe.
We had a perfectly decent house in the suburbs,
until the Vuvv built a Gorging Complex right above it.
- That sucks. - Yeah.
They bought out all the lots around us.
My dad was the last holdout.
But the debris got so bad, that when he finally sold,
it barely paid us enough for the gas money to get here.
Jesus.
Wait, so why here?
You guys got family in town or somethin'?
Yeah.
We were at my uncle's for a bit.
Technically, we still are if anyone asks,
since it's in the district
and that's why I'm allowed to come here.
Wait, why "technically"?
Well, their house flooded last week,
so we had to move out.
Damn, I'm... I'm sorry.
Where are you now?
You know, we're moving around.
A motel, when we can afford it.
And when you can't?
Was he a good teacher?
Yeah, I guess.
Always seemed like he hated his job,
but must have meant a lot to him.
This sort of thing's getting way too common.
I know.
Hey.
You guys got a place to stay tonight?
We'll figure something out.
I got kind of a crazy idea.
We really just can't tell you
how grateful we are, Mrs. Campbell.
Truly.
Well, happy to help.
Adam is a very empathetic kid.
Not a kid, Mom.
And just so you know,
we're not the type of family that typically lives out of our car.
Dad.
We actually had a pretty nice nest egg for a while there.
If I'd just put it all into Vuvv tech, whoo,
- we'd be great right now.
Well, none of us were prepared.
Now, we just have to adapt.
That's right.
- You hear that, Hunter? - Yeah, I heard her.
Anyway, um, it's so nice to finally
be sitting at a real table and eating some real food.
It's not real food.
Hunter. - It's not.
I see how they make it.
They just paste synthetic cow cells into a mold.
And they print it.
- By the yard. Hey.
By the mile.
Hey!
However you've prepared it, it's delicious.
So how long are you staying?
Nat! That's rude.
How is that rude?
I told Chloe her family could stay as long as they needed.
Oh! Okay.
It's not like we're usin' the basement for anything else.
Mrs. Campbell,
as soon as we can afford it, we'll start paying rent.
Mm.
You said they were only stayin' for one night.
Mom, they were literally sleeping
in a car under an overpass.
There are lots of people sleepin'
under overpasses, Adam.
They all can't sleep in our basement.
Why not?
Seriously, why not if we have the space?
You can go down to the overpass right now
and find 10 families that need more help than they do.
Okay, sure, but none of them have a kid in my class.
Thank you, Chloe.
Of course. Thank you so much for dinner. It was delicious.
You're welcome.
That was a weird dinner.
Yeah.
Sorry.
It's not your fault.
Hey, what are you doing this weekend?
Uh, no plans. Why?
You wanna come scavenging with me?
The trick is finding which area they use
as a dumping-ground.
Usually, it's a field like this.
The shitty part is,
you can only salvage the stuff that survives,
like, the huge drop.
I mean, that is what the people up there are like.
They'd rather their shit be destroyed
than end up in some pleb's living room.
It sounds like you've been up there.
Nah. But almost did.
- Once. - Really?
How?
My dad was a real estate developer,
and, uh, him and his partner
actually had an offer to subcontract
for a Vuvv firm...
to, uh, design the human housing
once they started lettin' people move up there.
Seriously?
Yeah.
He turned 'em down, though.
Why?
He was a proud guy.
Didn't, uh...
Didn't think the terms were fair.
I mean, I don't think he really understood
how quickly the wealth from down here
would migrate up there, you know.
Where is he now?
My dad?
Dad is in California.
What are you doing?
I'm just sketching.
Sketching me?
Is that okay?
Yeah, um...
My dad has some thing for the West Coast.
Once business started dryin' up around here,
he got convinced that it was the last place
you could make a decent livin',
so, thought he'd start fresh,
you know,
start sendin' us back checks.
Did it work?
You'd have to ask him.
To do that, you'd have to find him first, so...
I'm so sorry, Adam. I didn't mean to bring up...
No, no. Uh, it's okay. Um...
Can you, uh...
Can you do that look you were just doin'?
What?
You were, like... You were doin' this look,
like, when you were lookin' up.
Can... Can you do that again?
Like this?
Just like that.
Adam! Adam!
Adam!
Come on.
You ready?
Yes.
Sure you're not gonna make fun of it?
Yes.
All right.
Here we go.
It's too much build-up now.
Oh, my God, Adam!
Uh, can we do this again? Like, without the towel...
Just show me!
All right.
Oh, my God!
Is that a good "Oh, my God" or a bad "Oh, my God"?
Very good.
Very, very good.
It's hilarious but...
And it also really kinda looks like me.
- You like it? Really?
- I really do.
Well, I want you to have it. It's yours.
Seriously?
Yeah. I mean, well, you need somethin'
to put on these walls down here.
This might be the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me.
Shut up.
Maybe the second-nicest.
What's the first?
Well, I don't wanna make you jealous,
but there's this kid in my class
who let my entire family stay at his house.
- Oh, really? - Mm-hmm.
Sounds like a real try hard, that guy.
Well, he's actually extremely kind.
And smart.
Okay, well, now I am jealous.
Chloe?
Uh, yeah?
Oh, hey, Adam.
What's up, Mr. Marsh?
Uh, what's up?
Oh, did you, uh, do something with my Q-tips?
No.
Huh.
I can't find them.
Well, good luck.
An interesting piece.
Thanks.
So, you guys steal this stuff, or what?
We found it.
You gonna buy?
I wish I could. Um...
I'm real short on cash. But if you two could help...
This isn't a charity booth. Okay?
So, either pay up
or make room for the other customers.
What other customers?
Sorry.
I guess this was a bust.
It's okay.
No, it's not, though. I really wanna be able to pay you guys rent.
Don't worry about it.
Or at least our share of the heating bills.
Chloe, it's fine, really.
I don't think we even have our share.
It might be a cold winter.
Well, you're very sweet to help me with this.
Hey, it's, uh, you know, somethin' to do.
Hey, you know, we could...
we could always consider doing a Courtship Broadcast.
A what?
You know, where you set your nodes to broadcast
instead of receive,
and then they watch you while you go on dates.
They actually, like, pay to watch
and then they send it straight to your account.
You've never heard about this?
Okay, well...
You know, they don't have, like,
"dating" in their culture.
They don't have "love."
They reproduce asexually. They "bud."
So, they find romantic stuff,
like, super exotic and interesting.
Well, anyway, it's just a thought.
You don't think that'd be kinda awkward, though?
Not really.
I don't find being with you awkward.
It's kinda the opposite of awkward.
Yeah, um...
Um, I...
I mean, I feel the same way.
That's why we'd probably make
a good Courtship Broadcast, actually.
Now that we're talking about it.
Yeah, but...
You don't wanna just
let it develop, like, naturally?
We can still develop naturally.
The more natural the better. They like natural.
Okay, how does it work?
You have zero current viewers
and zero dollars total.
Your palms are a little sweaty.
I know. I'm sorry.
Don't apologize.
You know, it's actually probably a good thing.
Why?
Because this thing picks up
on, like, everything you're experiencing.
Sight, sound, touch.
They probably like to feel the nervousness.
Makes it more immersive.
You have zero current viewers
and $0.13 total.
You have nice eyes. Did you know that?
Thank you.
Shit.
What's wrong?
Well, they don't wanna see that. It's depressing.
Are you sure they wanna see any of this? At all?
Well, they won't if you keep editorializing.
Come on, loosen up! Just be yourself.
I hate when people say that.
What do you mean?
Well, I mean...
I guess I'd just rather be anyone else.
- You would?
Yeah, wouldn't anyone?
Adam, you don't need to try to be yourself.
It's not a skill.
You just, like, do nothing.
You just exist.
Just breathe.
Come on! Breathe with me.
Just like that.
You have six current viewers
and $4.76 total.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I treated you mean today.
You shouldn't believe what I say
when I'm with the rest of the kids.
Nobody... Nobody acts sincere.
Yeah.
You have 427 current viewers
and $1,239 total.
Why did you do that?
I felt like it.
Your lips are soft.
Get out of here.
See how they pound it.
They pound it and it was...
it was tender.
Oh, my God!
I haven't had real meat in so long.
I know. I'd forgotten what it tastes like.
To our two little entrepreneurs!
Mm.
To a very profitable week.
Dad, you're not supposed to talk
about the broadcast on the broadcast.
It ruins the suspension of disbelief.
Well, it ruins dinner when you're wearing them.
So, why don't you take 'em off?
It's so nice to sit down for a family dinner.
Isn't it, Adam?
Sure is.
Family dinner is one of our most cherished human rituals.
It's an important chance to strengthen the bond
between parents and their young.
Helps our numbers when she explains
- things like that for them. - Mm.
A good meal like this isn't just about sustenance.
This ritual also expresses
our camaraderie for each other.
Do you have to do this right now, Chloe?
Uh, no, I don't have to.
Do you want me to stop?
I really like Hunter's idea
about no nodes at the dinner table.
How about we go ahead and implement that rule?
Sure, sorry.
Um, we'll take a quick break,
and we'll be back after dinner for...
- What were we doing? - Uh...
Picking out your homecomin' dress.
For homecoming dress picking-out.
You have 87 viewers and $308.
Well, my dear lady,
I don't want to alarm you.
Oh. Well, after tonight,
nothing can alarm me.
I understand. It must have been terrible.
You have 62 viewers and 200...
Maybe it's nice if we, uh,
just don't wear them for a while.
Why?
I don't know.
I feel like we barely spend any time without 'em.
Well, I know.
I think that's part of why we do so good.
Don't you?
Yeah.
I don't know, I guess I just wanna know
that, um, you wanna spend time with me
when nobody's watchin'.
Adam.
Yeah?
A week ago, I had nothing good in my life.
Nothing.
I mean, I was starting to think there was nothing good
left in the world.
Then I found you.
On to lesson five.
"Where is the nearest restaurant?"
" I apologize. I mean no disrespect."
Dad, I don't even know
how I'm supposed to make that noise.
No part of my body can make that noise.
Well, it certainly won't if you don't try.
So, let's, uh... Yeah, let's do that one again.
" I apologize. I mean no disrespect."
Excuse me.
Oh. Hey, Beth.
What, uh...
What is this?
So, we heard about a last-minute job opening
for a personal grooming position
up in one of the developments.
But they turned Hunter away because
they're only considering humans who speak Vuvv.
And I just found some language lessons,
so this doesn't happen again.
Ah, I see.
Uh, maybe in the future,
you could just ask me before using, uh, my computer?
Oh. I'm sorry.
Well, we don't have one, so...
So?
So it's basic human decency to let us use it.
Okay, Hunter...
Hunter, I don't know how you were raised,
but in this house, it's basic human decency
to ask before using something that doesn't belong to you.
You're almost finished with the lesson.
- Would you like to continue? - Hey, Beth.
Could you try not to humiliate me in front of my son?
Excuse me?
We should have asked, but that doesn't mean
you have to come in and disrespect me.
How did I disrespect you?
"I don't know how you were raised"?
Well, Beth, you're looking at the man who raised him.
I didn't mean it as an insult to you or anything.
That was not my intention.
I didn't think I'd be in this situation.
Broke, dragging my kids around,
relying on my daughter for income,
living in a basement.
What does that have to do with...
Do not speak over me!
You are not better than me.
- All right?
You're not smarter, you're not stronger,
you're just luckier.
- Mom, what's going on?
You got a lotta nerve speakin' to me like that. We're doing you all a favor.
Whoa, we're payin' rent now.
All right, you're not the fucking Red Cross,
- you're a landlord! - Hey, hey! Calm down!
- Dad. - Well, if it's so humbling
living here, you know what you can do?
You are more than welcome to pack all your shit
and fuck all the way off.
- That's what you can do. - Hey, okay. That's...
There's zero need for that kind of language!
I thought you were a lawyer.
JD/MBA!
Check the plaque out on the wall!
And these are not your chips, Hunter!
What do you mean, they're not "my" chips? I wasn't saying
- it was my chips! - These chips are not yours
'cause you didn't ask for them!
I'm sorry, but you cannot talk to us this way! -̌What's going on?
It's not okay! - Why are we yelling?
And she's not doing us a favor!
- Hunter!
Calm down!
You know what? Stop! Just stop! Stop!
I think we need to come up with a set of very clear
and very simple house rules.
- Rich old bitch. - I swear to God, Hunter,
if I hear another word out of you...
Leave it alone, Chlo.
She's not rich.
No one down here is rich.
Well, she's still got this big-ass house.
Okay, that up there,
that's how rich people act.
I mean, we're just street people to her.
Doesn't matter that Dad's an accountant.
We're a bunch of bums!
And she doesn't want our dirty hands
all over her computer keyboard.
I mean, this shit is degrading!
It's...
We need to get outta here.
We're not gonna find a better situation than this.
What? Kissing that loser for cash?
Maybe it's not just about money, Hunter.
Maybe I like him, and I want to kiss him.
- You ever consider that? - Yeah, I think you do,
and I think it's the worst part of this whole thing.
What do you mean?
You're playing lovey-dovey with a kid
who is locking you and your family up in his basement!
Enough!
Please, can we just eat?
- What's this? - It's a bolo, man.
You get it from your little buddies who have bug friends?
- Get off! - What are you doing, bro?
Hey!
You have 49 viewers and $207 total.
You look nice. Where'd you get the suit?
It's my dad's.
Well, it looks great on you.
Yeah, it gets the job done.
You have 62 viewers and $238 total.
You look beautiful.
Thanks.
Hey, um, so, I've been wantin'
to talk about what's been goin' on with our parents.
Hey. Hey!
Would you keep that shit out of my line of sight?
Why don't you keep your shit out of our line of sight?
Yeah, well, how about you get your own fucking idea
instead of stealing ours?
You didn't invent Courtship Broadcasts, bitch!
Sorry.
No, it's fine.
What I was tryin' to say was...
things have kind of been weird between us
ever since our parents had that thing...
You know, we can talk about it another time.
Right.
You have 87 viewers and $308 total.
Except no 'cause, you're... you're kinda bein' weird,
and maybe we should just take these off and talk.
So I'm being weird. It's my fault.
Don't be like that. I'm trying to make things work.
You're trying to make this work?
I'm the one who's always trying
to explain things for them,
and you make me feel like a lunatic for doing it.
Like this whole thing is just so painful for you.
Yeah, well, maybe it is painful for me.
Why would you say that?
Not the "dating you" part, the...
the... the "doin' it in front of aliens" part!
You really think that's fun?
- You know what I think? - What?
I think we should shut up about this and slow dance.
Fine.
You have 17 current viewers and $13 total.
School is such a wonderful place, isn't it?
Sure is.
Great place to learn
and hang out between classes with your girlfriend.
Adam Campbell? Chloe Marsh?
We just got a letter for the two of you.
What is it?
It just says
"Human Broadcasting Standards Commission."
Okay.
It looks like it says, uh...
I told you he couldn't translate.
Anybody else here take a Vuvv language?
No, I know how to read it. I...
I don't know how to put this delicately.
- What? - Just say it.
I think you two are being sued.
Whoa.
Will you stop tapping your foot?
Okay, can you just calm down?
We are goin' to be fine.
How's it gonna be fine?
What do you mean, "How's it gonna be fine?"
It's probably just a misunderstanding.
People don't just sue other people about misunderstandings.
You are now leaving US jurisdiction
and entering international air space.
W e are approaching Autonomous Residential Hub number 113.
There is a driver waiting for you on the central lawn.
Driver?
So, uh,
how long have you been with, um...
How long have I been with (SPEAKS VUVV)?
Yeah, that name.
Did you say, um, "swoo hee"?
It answers to "Shirley,"
for those who can't handle proper pronunciation.
And I've been working with it for just over a year.
Did you drive humans before that?
No, I was a neurosurgeon before this.
- You're kidding! - Neurosurgeon.
I used to be very prominent in the field.
That's why I qualified for this position.
It's fashionable to have a powerful human as a driver.
They don't need drivers.
They don't need cars.
They could be zooming around
on self-piloting hoverspheres like they do in other systems.
But here,
it's how the locals do it.
It's cool.
Wait, so, did you
just run out of business as a surgeon?
Like, there's not enough wealthy humans up here
to operate on?
I don't appreciate your assumptions, my friend.
Sorry.
Of course I still had people to operate on.
But my starting salary with
is five times what I ever made
in my best years as a surgeon.
And I have kids to look after.
Anyway, we're here.
Wait, where?
Um...
So, do we just...
That's right.
Here, let me help you down.
Nah, I'm good.
Oh.
And avoid direct eye contact.
It tends to spook them.
Leave us.
So, um, we got your letter.
For a period of time,
your broadcast was quite enjoyable.
Thank you.
My own offspring,
in fact, began watching it regularly.
- That's fantastic. - Wow.
However, it has recently become obvious,
you are deceiving your viewers.
- What? - Deceiving?
- What? - What do you mean?
Yeah.
The title of your broadcast
is "Adam and Chloe in Love."
That's right.
And yet, you are not in love.
I, um... I'm not sure that's true.
It is fully true.
How do you know?
You don't know what's in our hearts.
Miss Marsh...
I am an expert not only in human law,
but also in human mating customs.
I have been studying them since before you were born.
You may have been in love
at the beginning of your series,
but you are no longer.
Your biology betrays you.
Your cheeks no longer fill with blood
in the other's presence.
Your palms no longer produce fluid.
Your central blood distribution organ
no longer pumps at shorter intervals
when holding one another's hands.
Well, what can we do about it?
I want you to repay all funds you have received.
Wait.
We can't possibly do that.
We've already spent everything we've made, just to live.
Then I will take you to court
and your families will be in debt
for approximately six generations.
Okay, we... we can get that love back.
Just give us some time to work on our relationship.
Right?
Yeah.
Yeah, what if... what if we just started over
and kept doing this?
But we did it with other people?
So, you didn't think to talk to me first?
- Like, one-on-one? - I'm sorry, it just came out.
So, you didn't mean it?
I don't know.
Yeah, I don't think you meant it.
I think that we both know that what we have
is the only good thing in either of our lives,
and it would be a mistake to let that go.
Something's off, Adam.
I mean, that thing was right about that.
I know you feel it too.
Okay, fine, yeah,
but that's just the weirdness with our families.
- I can fix that. - How?
I... I don't know! But I can...
Look, everything's just too complicated now.
Okay? And...
And I think it would just make more sense
if we separate the business side of what we do
from our friendship.
Were we ever really friends?
I think I was just a rung on a ladder to you,
another head to step on as you climb to the top.
Have you ever slept on the street, Adam?
No, but what does that have to...
Have you ever had to take turns staying up all night
to make sure a bum doesn't run off with all your possessions?
- Have you ever had to... - You don't need to lecture me,
all right? 'Cause I've been through plenty of shit
you haven't experienced either.
Okay, yeah! And I get that.
Okay, but look, I'm just like any other person.
Okay? I wanna grow up and fall in love
and be swept off my feet.
But that's a higher-order need.
I'll figure that out
after I manage food and shelter, okay?
Passengers will be subject to search
at docking station two.
Contraband will be seized and incinerated.
Ma'am, would you like my seat?
"User agrees that, when device is set to 'Broadcast,'
"all human behavior displayed by user
"will be authentic human behavior.
"Failure to comply will result in immediate prosecution."
Nobody reads this shit though, right?
I'm sorry, baby.
They got you on this one.
Come on, not with you defendin' me in court.
I don't think it'd be a good idea to go to trial.
So... So, what am I supposed to do?
Convince it to take pity on you
and drop the charges.
Ma, I already tried that.
I don't think empathy is a concept for 'em.
But they have hearts.
Deep down in there, I know they do.
No. No, I'm sayin'
I literally think they don't have
circulatory systems, period.
I don't know what to say then.
So, you're just givin' up?
Do you know what type of lawyers they hire?
I don't even wanna think about the kind of people that would work with them.
Exactly!
The worst kind.
You irritate them,
they hit you with heavier charges.
Then we're not even talkin'
about losin' the house at that point.
Talkin' about debtor's prison,
floatin' over the Antarctic somewhere.
You take on this fight,
it just gets worse.
You know, when I was young, somebody told me
that it's always better to fight.
I thought that somebody was you.
Stop looking at me like that.
Like what? Guys! What did I just say?
Yeah, but then she started staring me down!
Clearly, you've never been stared down
because this isn't staring you down.
You know what I said is true! You know it!
I told you to be quiet!
Are we gonna make it?
What do you mean?
I just mean,
sometimes it feels like we're not gonna make it.
What, like, are we gonna survive?
You know, I look around the world now and...
less and less of it seems like a place
anyone would wanna be.
Well, jeez, honey.
Sometimes...
you make it really hard to keep hope alive.
Hey, Nat. - Yeah?
We're gonna be fine.
Never heard Mom talk like that.
Don't worry about Mom.
I got you.
Ma'am,
I'm really not sure
when my boss will next be available.
I've got time.
Is that comfortable on your skin?
It's not supposed to be comfortable.
It's chic.
Ma'am.
It'll see you now.
Uh...
Hello, uh, sir, ma'am. Uh...
My name is Beth Campbell,
- uh, and...
Sit.
Okay.
You are the Campbell mother.
I am aware.
My entire brood and I have watched
the deceitful broadcast
of the Campbell boy and the Marsh girl.
Well, I'm glad to hear it. Uh...
And I'm very sorry you found it deceitful.
Romantic love is the most unique and poetic
of all human love modes.
It should never be faked.
Hmm. I, um... I agree.
Then you understand
why your child must be taken to court.
Well, in theory, yes, but...
In that case,
our business here is concluded.
Could I ask you a question?
Briefly.
Uh...
The little one that left your office earlier,
was that a member of your brood?
That is my latest offspring.
That's a form of love, isn't it?
Love for one's offspring.
We don't call this "love."
Love is a human phenomenon, a bizarre offshoot
of your collaborative reproductive process.
Well, Shirley...
Can I call you Shirley?
I can assure you
that the reproductive process isn't always "collaborative."
One sex tends to bear the burden of the process.
I am well aware of human mating practices.
Well, then you know what I'm talkin' about when I say
there's one very unique type of human love,
even stronger than romantic love.
Continue.
It's a mother's love for her children.
I think you know what I'm talkin' about because...
and I'm goin' out on a limb here,
but...
I think you feel it yourself.
I think you have the same kinda love
for your own offspring.
And right now, Shirley...
my children are suffering.
They've lost faith in me...
as their parent
and as their protector.
And I'm hopeful the two of us
can find a creative way...
to pay off my son's debt.
Think of it as a study abroad.
A semester, if you will.
Like a homestay.
Shirley just wants this kid
to be immersed in the human culture.
By being your husband?
My pretend husband.
Like...
Like Chloe was Adam's pretend girlfriend.
It gets to play-act having its own earthling family.
Oh, God. Why would it even want that?
Because it watches a lot of node-broadcasts
and old TV shows and...
Look, Shirley thinks it will open up its mind.
So what? Do you have to have sex with it or...
Yo, what?
No, Nat! That is disgusting.
It doesn't even have the equipment for that.
Anyway, for now,
I was able to get her to drop the lawsuit.
So, as long as its kid stays happy,
we get to keep the house.
Thank you, Ma.
Don't thank her.
- I'd rather starve. - Natalie!
This was the best option we had. All right?
I'm not happy about it either.
So, I don't wanna hear any more complaints about it.
Honestly?
In a week,
we probably won't even notice it around.
Do you want me to cut that for you?
Yes, wife.
Cut it.
Yeah, I think I'mma, um, finish this in the other room
if everyone's cool with that.
That's fine with me.
I think I'm gonna head out too.
The small one may go.
The large one must stay.
Um...
They have names that we call them by.
Uh, this is Adam
and that is Natalie.
Uh... These are my kids.
Yes.
Is there something you want us to call you?
"Father" will do.
That is your name for this position, yes?
Um...
Yeah, that's the... that's the title.
There's usually a name attached to it though.
"Father" will do.
Before we start today's lesson,
I wanna remind you
that our class is just one of many modules
you can access at any time
from the comfort of your own home.
A few highlights from the rest of our curriculum
include courses on Advanced Vuvv Language,
Vuvv Engineering,
Vuvv Moral Philosophy,
Human Televisual Culture Through A Vuvv Lens,
Vuvv Hygiene,
Vuvv Cuisine,
Vuvv Slang,
Vuvv Logistic Theory,
Vuvv Ecology...
Hey.
You don't think it's strange that we live in the same house
but I have to come find you at school to talk to you?
It's definitely strange.
Well, I hate it.
I see what's going on upstairs.
I'm worried about you.
I mean, things aren't great downstairs either,
but I just feel like we can't speak now.
I don't... I don't get what you're trying to say.
Well, I guess I just wanna know that you're okay.
Are you okay?
With all due respect...
I don't have time for a conversation about feelings.
I got "higher-order needs" to worry about.
That's my boy!
He's half-mine too, you know.
Hey, Pop.
Well, I'm gonna go upstairs and talk to Jenny.
You do that, son.
Welcome home, son.
Adam.
Come give your father a hug.
Fuck off.
Adam! You can't talk to it that way.
Adam!
Do you know what happens
if that thing gets sick of us and decides to leave?
- Don't care. - The payments dry up,
- the lawsuit's back on...
...and we lose the house.
Close my damn refrigerator! Runnin' up my bill.
Also, what are you doin' home so early?
Don't you have school?
That thing is not my dad.
Where do you think you're goin'?
To the basement.
- With the Marshes? - Better than up here.
Ordinary Americans just want to work,
and they feel increasingly cut off
from the wealth generated since the landing.
And to those people, I would say,
"Go get your piece of the pie!"
The Vuvv want to trade.
They want to work with humans.
And let's not forget,
their technology didn't win out by force.
We wanted it because it's better than ours!
I think this is a uniquely exciting time
for those with entrepreneurial instincts.
Please, Steve.
- It's a terrible time to be an entrepreneur. Terrible time to be a bad entrepreneur, sure.
You want a beer, Adam?
You've seen the data! - I won't tell your mother.
I've seen the data.
- Sure. Human businesses
are shutting down at an unprecedented cliff.
Sure, bad, inefficient human businesses
are being shut down
- at an unprecedented cliff. - Thanks.
Poor quality products
and over-priced services are disappearing.
It's called creative disruption.
- And it benefits the consumer.
I like to compare it to pruning the bushes
or setting the dead prairie grass on fire.
I grew up on a farm, Steve...
Diggin' the new look, Hunter.
Eat a dick.
He gave you a compliment.
He's taking time to adjust.
But Chloe says it's the look, up there.
She's right.
You hear that, Hunter?
I think it's really gonna open up his career prospects.
Dad, I'm watching.
...unheard and abandoned populace.
Who's abandoned them,
- Susan? Who? You know,
the boneheads who do stuff like this
only make the rest of us look uncivilized.
It's not gonna fix any problems.
It's not supposed to fix anything.
People are just angry.
Well, if they're angry with anyone,
they should be angry at themselves.
For not bein' able to hang in a more competitive economy.
Well, at some point, it stops being competition.
Starts being domination.
. ..nodes, which I have called, on the record,
- the most significant...
...breakthrough in my lifetime!
That's awful rich comin' from you.
Excuse me?
People like your mother have been dominating
people like us for decades.
Hunter!
Don't be provocative!
He means landlords and lawyers.
People... People like my mother
have been dominatin' people like you?
Yeah. That's what I said, rich boy.
Mm.
We must've taken a different version of US History then.
Yeah. I didn't actually get to finish high school.
Yeah, no, it shows.
Guys, please.
Fuck this, I'm done.
And why is that?
It's because the tax base has come absolutely...
I'm sorry about him.
- He's just frustrated.
He's just ignorant.
Okay.
Well...
I think it's getting increasingly difficult
for our viewers to ignore
- your personal attack.
Now, I'm gonna take the high road here,
- and remind you that... - I must say, Adam, it's...
it's just a little galling to hear you complain
when you guys are doing so well up there.
What are you talkin' about, "doing so well"?
I mean, you've got a house of your own,
an educated parent,
and an actual Vuvv living with you.
I mean, Jesus, I...
I would give my left leg to give my family
an opportunity to make connections like that.
No, we could all...
...have a life even down here
if we simply worked hard enough
and embraced the present.
Adam.
Dad?
Don't wake your mother.
- What are you doing here? - Calm down.
For just one second, I just wanna talk to you.
It's 2:00 a.m. You couldn't have called first?
Are you gonna knock my head off or can you put that thing down for a second
so we can have a conversation?
You're right.
I should have called.
Yeah, or even returned a call.
I was just waiting until I had some good news to share,
and it's, uh... it's taking
a little longer than I thought.
Wait, wait, wait, slow down, slow down.
I thought you were in California.
I was, I was. Um...
West Coast
- is dried up.
Every time I get a foothold
in a new type of business,
those things would
find a way to take it over and price me out.
Maybe you should've worked with 'em
when you had the chance.
Is that what you think?
I don't know what I think.
So... So you'd rather be livin' up there?
I didn't say that.
No, of course.
No, of course you didn't.
You, uh...
You got too much of your dad in you
to say somethin' like that.
What's that mean?
It means that we would rather live
in a cardboard box
than be some gooey coffee table's bitch.
They do look like that!
Right?
They're disgustin'.
You know, speakin' of disgustin', what's this?
What's... What's goin' on here?
Hmm? Your mom didn't teach you how to shave?
Come on, man, it's a choice.
Oh, yeah, nah, it's definitely a choice.
Yeah, I'm just messin' with you, man. You look good.
You look real good.
You grew up.
A lot's changed around here.
Yeah, I bet.
So, uh...
how's Nattie?
She's good.
Doesn't really go by Nattie anymore though.
She's either Natalie or Nat.
- Nat? - Yeah.
Man, I really miss you guys.
Your, uh...
Your mom find someone else?
Hey, not that I have any right to object.
Does she hate me?
I'll be right back.
Adam, what's goin' on in there?
Dad?
Nat!
What?
What is going on?
I don't know.
Attention, everybody.
Attention, we have some great news to share!
The district has just implemented
a new, comprehensive curriculum
on all of your nodes.
So, that means
you no longer have to come into school.
So, you can all go home now.
What?
What's going on?
Yeah!
Well, it's such a beautiful day,
I hate to get out of bed.
- Any breakfast left?
I think so. I'll get you coffee.
There's some toast right there on the...
Well, now, that's funny.
There was a whole plate of toast there
and a whole dish of strawberry...
...for the offenders.
A government bill to crack down on laboratories...
Change it back.
...is expected to become law today.
Animal rights activists have been...
That's okay, all I want is a cup of coffee.
And a newspaper if I can find it.
Oh, it's over there on the table, hon. Oh.
Where are you going?
For goodness' sake. Baby, can't you...
To make myself some lunch.
...when you finish reading
instead of curling it up like this?
I haven't even seen it, Pop. Sit.
Ricky, then.
I haven't seen it, either.
Well, it didn't get messed
this way all by itself.
Oh, well, as I'm the only one left,
I might as well plead guilty, I guess.
The family on the screen-box.
This is a good human family.
A financially productive father.
A mother who tends the brood and cleans the nest.
Our home should replicate this Golden-Age human experience.
- It is why I enjoyed
the broadcast of your offspring and his mate.
Smiling. Laughter.
Love.
Very good. My package has arrived.
You ordered something?
It is for you.
Hi, Mom. Hi, dear.
Boy, that cake sure looks good.
Can we go now?
What's the rush?
We're gonna be sittin' in the house for a long time.
Okay.
What the hell?
Yes?
Hey, I'm looking for Beth Campbell.
This is her.
This is Heather's Bucket of Broth.
Uh, you left a resume here about a month ago.
Time to go relax
and read the paper for a while.
Wait, I'll get it for you.
Where are you going? - I'm headed out.
I'll be back in a few hours.
What is "out"?
I just got a job.
Explain this.
Work. A job.
I interviewed for it a long time ago,
and they just called me out of nowhere
and, uh, they said they needed me
to come help out immediately.
I'm really excited about it.
What the heck is going on around here?
Nothing's going on.
Gee whiz, what has happened to our happy home?
My wife does not need a job.
I provide.
- Except you don't.
Your parent pays me.
And frankly,
they don't pay me nearly enough to deal with this shit.
And so...
My wife will not go...
Hey, paddles down, honey.
I'm not done yet.
And so,
I will take this job
because the salary isn't great,
but it's enough to scrape by.
And I'd much rather scrape by and have my kids' respect
than be your human prop.
So, if that pisses you off,
you can go ahead and waddle on up to your mama
and have her sue us.
But just know this, your wife
has a law degree.
Graduated top of her class.
And even though you might outspend me,
you will never outwork me.
So, I ask you politely now.
Please move.
Did you hear me?
Move before I move you.
Sit down, wife.
Okay, then.
Stop it!
You slippery...
Hittin' me with your...
Stay!
Stay.
In fact he insists upon it.
- Wait a minute!
Mm!
Now, watch that!
And don't you ever hit me with your paddles again.
Disrespectin' me.
I'll scoop soup the rest of my life
before dealin' with any more of this crap!
You know, Harriet, the more I think about this true...
- ...the more I'm definitely... - Are you all right?
...convinced that he was wrong.
You know, it's funny you should say that... - Sir?
...because, the more I think about it...
Mom?
Shh.
Thank you, wife.
My offspring, how were your days?
Our day was great.
School was cancelled so me and Zach just...
scavenged for things to sell.
Excuse me, honey.
Don't say a word.
Okay.
Look, your mother has only herself to blame.
It saw that our family was a better match
for what it was looking for, and it chose us.
If you want it back, you can try
to offer it a better service.
But at this point,
we are the superior value proposition.
Can't argue with that.
What's your name again?
Good.
Zach. - 'Cause I feel guilty but...
What do you do, Zach?
...I know you'd do the same to us.
I go to school.
- I take Vuvv language.
And I crossed paths with your sister.
- You got the job!
- Look at this. Yeah, Hunter.
I was just clarifying.
Do you think that deal's still on
if it's a different family but in the same house?
As long as it doesn't complain to Shirley.
Cut it, wife.
As you did before.
I think it thinks he's you.
All humans look the same to them, I guess.
Well, I wouldn't let 'em know.
I could use the free babysittin' services.
Y'all want some soup?
Yeah. Come on.
No, what are you... Stop, stop, stop.
Give me this.
Come on. Wrist, wrist.
What are you doin' here?
Oh.
Here.
I decided to go out
to explore the rest of the human world.
The streets do not resemble those I see on the screen-box.
I became lost.
Are you all right?
Yes.
This is from you?
Yeah.
What purpose does it have?
It'd take too long to explain.
I'm not even really sure I know.
Let's go home, yeah?
Adam!
I'm sleeping!
Something's happening at the school!
Something about your mural?
What are you talkin' about?
Nat, what do you mean?
- Sorry, excuse me, excuse me. Excuse me. Sorry.
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Folks! I'm gonna need you to give us more space.
This is my last warning.
Adam.
What is this?
Uh, I... I... I don't know.
The little one saw your mural yesterday, right?
Right.
Then I guess it brought its... friends.
- Congrats, I guess.
Campbell child.
You are the creator of this human art.
Huh...
Yes, I am.
This is one of our most important experts in
and collectors of human art.
Oh.
Hi. I'm Adam.
You will now speak
a few words of explanation for your human art.
Oh. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, right. Right. Uh, of course.
Of course. Um...
I, uh...
I... I guess, uh, I just...
I've been through a lot recently and, um...
Well...
I kinda just wanted to let it all flow out of me, you know.
Let go of the past
and face the world, you know. Not as I want it to be but...
just as it is.
'Cause, uh... We've, um...
We've lost a lot since you guys came here.
But we've overcome a lot too, so...
Um, this is...
I guess that's what this is.
This is my monument to, uh...
to human resilience.
Young person,
it is unfortunate to see an artist of your skill
stuck in this dank backwater.
We would like to hire you
as our official artist-in-residence
to further develop your work
and to distribute it across our entire territory.
We will begin with a one-year contract
at a salary of 2.7 million dollars.
- Holy fuck, dude. - Oh, my God.
You're gonna be rich.
Uh...
I... I don't know what to say.
Thank you all for having me tonight.
You don't have to talk.
Just eat.
You have 16 viewers
- and $13 total. Whoo!
Holy shit!
- Shut up! - Okay! Okay.
- Okay.
They could at least have the dignity to keep it down.
Dad!
If it makes you feel better, Mr. Marsh,
I... I think his mural sucks.
I mean, like, he can't even draw people.
Like, she's orange.
You know what would make me feel better?
Is if you and my daughter had any viewers.
Would you excuse me, please?
I haven't seen that many zeroes
on a piece of paper in a long time.
This has gotta be a joke, right?
No, it's not a joke.
It's somebody finally seeing
how good you are at what you do.
I am so proud of you, Adam. Come here.
- Thank you. - I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
I'm gonna go dig out that bottle of champagne
and pop it.
- Champagne? - You and me and you,
- we drinkin' tonight!
Whoo!
What's up? You don't look too happy.
I am.
I'm really happy for you.
Nat, this not about me.
This is about us.
I know.
Just wish you didn't have to leave.
It's... It's only a few months though.
I'll be back before you know it.
What?
Nothin'.
I just feel like I've heard that one before.
Somewhere.
Mm.
Yeah.
Then, you'll be shuttled
to another one of our ships
where you'll begin work on another piece of human art.
We will send you to 12 galaxies.
You will complete a new centerpiece in each.
And then, we will duplicate your work
and sell it in each of our systems.
Soon, every species in our Co-Prosperity Alliance
will be moved by the poetic
and primitive humanness of your human art.
Sure.
But first, Campbell youth,
you will make a short speech in front of your first work.
Back... Back on Earth?
Not on Earth. Here.
You... You guys recreated the whole mural?
We did not reproduce it.
We transported it here.
And implemented minor edits for clarity.
Edits?
Go on. Tell them about your work.
Tell them how our arrival has helped you
transcend your barbaric nature and create beautiful art.
I, uh...
I...
Uh, I... I started, uh...
Uh...
I can't do this.
- Damn!
What the hell is goin' on out here?
My baby! My baby...
- The hell...
Baby, what's going on? What happened?
I... I couldn't do it, Ma.
- What do you mean? - I... I couldn't do it.
I refused the money. We... We lost it all.
- Oh, my God. Are you okay? I'm sorry.
- What? What's happening?
- Are you okay? - It's over, Nat.
I'm... I'm sorry, I messed up, y'all.
Beth, shut up!
You shut up, Curtis!
Go to bed with your nosy self.
Look. Baby, look at me. Look at me.
You didn't mess up anything.
Okay?
You're right where you're supposed to be.
Come on.
You're back?
What are you doin' here?
Couldn't sleep.
I thought you were gonna be up there for months.
Yeah, I was.
Changed my mind, though.
I saw them rip the wall off
and airlift it away.
It was awful.
Yeah.
It was a beautiful thing you made.
They shouldn't be able to do that.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
It's not your fault.
No, I mean it, like, generally.
I'm sorry.
Me too.
What are you doing?
I figured they left some of it standin'.
You just gonna stand there all night?