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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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‪片名:我叫莫妮克

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‪-莫妮克疯了
‪-金钱高于诚信

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‪莫妮克是个传奇

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‪-她得罪太多人
‪-那是个专业人士!

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‪-好样的
‪-今日傻驴!

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‪她很难缠

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‪莫妮克是个传奇?

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‪她得罪了太多人

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‪-她反复无常
‪-今日傻驴

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‪她的职业生涯玩完了

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‪感谢大家的鼓励

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‪开始吧

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‪噢 我的宝贝!

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‪来吧 宝贝!

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‪噢 宝贝!

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‪噢 乔治亚洲 亚特兰大!

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‪乔治亚洲 亚特兰大!

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‪噢 宝贝!

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‪我会好好感受这里的一切

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‪噢 我的宝贝!

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‪我们成功了 宝贝!

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‪我们成功了!

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‪莫妮克!

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‪站在这么屌的舞台上的人是我吗?

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‪站上这么屌炸天的舞台的人是我吗?

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‪我跟你们说 我此刻拼尽了全力

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‪才没有崩溃大哭 朋友们

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‪我跟你们说 我满怀感激

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‪我心存感恩

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‪我想对每一个支持我的大坏蛋

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‪说声谢谢 太他妈感谢了!

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‪我想对每一个站在我这边的坏蛋
‪说声谢谢 太他妈感谢了!

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‪我想感谢今晚
‪买票来到现场的每一个黑人同胞

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‪当然还有你 白人宝贝

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‪我想要感谢每一个人!

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‪今晚 当你们离我而去时
‪你们都会清楚了解我他妈究竟是谁

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‪今晚 当你们从这里走出去时

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‪你们都会明白
‪我他妈为什么会有这般作风

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‪今晚 当你们离开这个剧场时

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‪你们都会说:
‪“噢 婊贝 我现在懂了!”

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‪噢 宝贝 要知道 在大家恶语相向

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‪对我恶语中伤时 他们并不理解我

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‪他们并不了解我

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‪而他们却在那儿
‪说我没品 说那些屁话

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‪他们说:“莫妮克

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‪你怎么受得了
‪这些人对你说的那些屁话?

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‪看起来它们对你似乎毫无影响”

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‪大家不知道的是 宝贝

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‪我以为我永远不会
‪在电视直播 在现场舞台上

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‪说这些话
‪因为畏惧那些会随之而来污名

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‪大家不了解的是

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‪你们眼前的
‪是一个接受过特殊教育的姑奶奶

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‪我要你们看看特殊教育教出的人啥样

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‪我要所有人都看到
‪特殊教育是什么样子 朋友们!

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‪我要所有人看到
‪特殊人群是什么样子!

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‪我要大家明白 “阿巴阿巴”

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‪朋友们 那就是老娘!

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‪朋友们 那就是老娘!

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‪他们曾经对我极尽羞辱 朋友们

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‪从七年级到九年级

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‪老娘接受了特殊教育

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‪朋友们 你们听到了吧?

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‪特殊 朋友们

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‪教育 朋友们

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‪就像老娘跳交互绳
‪噢 特殊 朋友们!

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‪教育 朋友们!

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‪特殊教育

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‪当你想对别人评头论足时
‪宝贝 搞清楚你眼前的人是谁

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‪你眼前的这个姑奶奶 上中学时

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‪在七、八、九年级时

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‪接受的是特殊教育

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‪我现在就告诉你们吧

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‪免得你们费劲上网搜

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‪我真的觉得那次是个错误 朋友们

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‪我相信那他妈的是个错误
‪因为没有信寄到家里

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‪没有家长会

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‪也没有他妈的教育委员会谈话

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‪就是当我去到学校...

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‪去读中学时 婊贝

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‪我穿着新衣服去到学校

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‪我衣着光鲜
‪穿着我的Chic大码牛仔裤 宝贝

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‪我的白T恤
‪还搭配了我的白鞋子 婊贝

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‪我准备好迎接七年级的生活了

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‪然后我注意到

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‪我家里没有收到通知书...

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‪通知我要去哪个班级

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‪于是我说:“噢 今年一定会非常特别

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‪他们没把通知寄到我家
‪我得自己到学校去拿

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‪这可真他妈有够特殊的!”

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‪当你走进去 他们那儿有你的名字

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‪在一块破牌子上面

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‪写着你要去哪个班 婊贝

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‪他们拿着你的名字 所有小孩
‪跑过来:“我在这个班 那个班!”

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‪我看着那块破牌子

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‪“婊贝 给我看看你的牌子
‪上面写了什么 婊贝?”

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‪我的通知装在了一个信封里

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‪好吗 婊贝?
‪我的通知是他妈装在信封里的

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‪我知道这应该是什么情况了

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‪但我一向都很乐观

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‪我一向都说“杯子是半满的”

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‪所以当我看到我的通知放在信封里时
‪我不假思索地就说:

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‪“噢 婊贝!这一定很特别 婊贝!

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‪他们把你的通知
‪装在了信封里 婊贝”

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‪所以当我打开信封...

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‪那家伙说:
‪“上面写的什么 婊贝?写的什么?”

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‪“朋友 我会告诉你的”

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‪上面写着:“B...217室”

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‪对吧?

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‪于是我想:“‘B’代表的是‘棒呆’

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‪我是这里最棒的小婊贝

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‪咱要去217室了 朋友们

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‪我是在咱中学的二楼

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‪朋友们 他们是不会让新生去二楼的

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‪除非他们很特别 朋友们

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‪姐在B217室”

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‪等我去到217室

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‪我并没有看到那个该死的“B”
‪但我说:“好吧

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‪反正217还在!”

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‪于是我骄傲地走进了教室

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‪穿着我的新衣服

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‪老师在里面 我把我的资料给了她

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‪因为她说:“噢 你是谁啊?”

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‪我说:“莫妮克艾姆斯”

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‪她说:“噢 我名单上没有你的名字”

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‪我说:“但我有这份通知啊”

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‪在她把通知拿过去时 她轻笑了一声

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‪我不明白她笑什么

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‪但我想:“管她去死 老娘是最棒的”

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‪“去她的!” 对吧?

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‪她轻笑一声说:“噢 不

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‪不是这个217

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‪你在一楼 后面的那个教室”

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‪“B”代表的是“背后” 婊贝

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‪背后 到后面去 婊贝

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‪等我去到B217室

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‪我走进了教室

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‪我看到有个大婊贝戴着个头盔

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‪还有条下巴带

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‪我说:“我操!”

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‪然后我乐观地想:

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‪“好吧 那可能是她的时尚表达 婊贝

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‪这儿可是中学

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‪那个大婊贝可能会说
‪‘我要用这顶头盔干掉所有人’”

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‪她戴着那破玩意儿 对吧?

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‪然后 等我坐下来

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‪我看到那边有个白人小男生

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‪他把胶水

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‪倒在自己的手上

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‪我喜欢看热闹 朋友们

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‪我他妈非常喜欢看热闹

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‪我在旁边煽风点火

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‪我看着他手上的胶水干掉

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‪然后他在手里揉搓它

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‪小提米知道我当时正在看着他

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‪于是这小子一下就变身成了魔术师

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‪他看起来就像...

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‪然后丫说...

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‪我说:“噢 婊贝
‪我进了特殊教育班!

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‪他妈的 老娘进了特殊教育班!”

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‪但你们觉得我这就被击垮了吗?

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‪我看到了它好的一面 妈的
‪因为当我看向黑板时

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‪我看到了他们要教的内容

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‪我心想:“老娘要在这里称霸一方

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‪原色 二级色

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‪荣誉榜!”

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‪我就是在这里发现了

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‪我母亲是个文盲

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‪你们真他妈没心肝

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‪你们太没心肝了

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‪嘲笑我妈妈不识字

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‪你们这些没良心的混蛋!

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‪我们没有过这样的对话

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‪大家没有坐下来正式说这事

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‪只是当你开始观察时

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‪在学业上
‪我也许不是现场最聪明的人

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‪因为我是在后面的特殊教育教室

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‪但是没关系的 朋友的

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‪当有异动发生时

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‪我看得出来

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‪因为我非常善于观察
‪我会察言观色 好吧?

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‪我拿出了老师写的一封信

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‪这个天杀的
‪要给我家捎个信 聊聊 “莫妮克

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‪话太多的事”

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‪所以我毫无改变 各位!

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‪老娘这一辈子都他妈在做这件事!

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‪“她话太多了 她影响了大家

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‪再发生这种情况
‪我们就要开个家校会议了”

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‪我看完了那封信

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‪我要把这破玩意儿带回家

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00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:21,222
‪我有一大特质 我很诚实

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‪我很诚实 婊贝

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‪如果我做错事 婊贝 我很诚实
‪我他妈会说:“是我搞砸了”

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‪所以回家的路上 我很紧张

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00:11:31,273 --> 00:11:33,901
‪因为我要把这封信交给我妈妈

197
00:11:33,901 --> 00:11:36,445
‪这个老白男说老娘话太多了

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00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:39,699
‪他不是唯一一个人
‪我妈妈也跟我说过同样的话

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‪所以我的家人现在都不喜欢老娘

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‪好吧?

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‪我到家后 我把这封该死的信给了她

202
00:11:50,626 --> 00:11:53,212
‪她把它打开

203
00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:54,797
‪我告诉你们

204
00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:58,175
‪当我第一次说我要在台上说这个时
‪我老公跟我说

205
00:11:58,175 --> 00:12:00,302
‪-他说了什么?
‪-朋友 我会告诉你的

206
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,808
‪他说:“妈妈

207
00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:09,228
‪别说你妈妈是文盲

208
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,439
‪那样太伤人了”

209
00:12:11,939 --> 00:12:15,109
‪我他妈念十年级时就认识我老公了

210
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,986
‪从我们14岁时就认识了

211
00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:22,366
‪他是我这辈子见过的最善良的人

212
00:12:22,366 --> 00:12:25,202
‪于是我直视着他说:“我就知道...

213
00:12:28,330 --> 00:12:31,751
‪你会这么说 小子

214
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,837
‪老娘从上十年级起就认识你了

215
00:12:34,837 --> 00:12:39,008
‪不过 小子 你也是
‪从上十年级起就他妈认识我了

216
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,302
‪她就是没有阅读能力 小子

217
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:44,513
‪那娘们儿就是文盲!”

218
00:12:46,557 --> 00:12:49,643
‪好吧 所以 我把那封该死的信给了她

219
00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:52,563
‪然后静待着暴雨袭来

220
00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:54,523
‪我等着她说:

221
00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:56,942
‪“我他妈是没跟你说过让你闭嘴吗?”

222
00:12:56,942 --> 00:12:59,403
‪我静待着暴雨袭来

223
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:01,113
‪她看着那封信

224
00:13:05,951 --> 00:13:07,745
‪她抬头看着我

225
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,622
‪她看着我的时候 我堆起了笑容

226
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:13,083
‪因为我要看看事情会如何发展
‪我也不知道信上说了些什么

227
00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:18,589
‪她把目光转回那封信上
‪然后看着我说:

228
00:13:18,589 --> 00:13:21,091
‪“妮妮 这真的很好”

229
00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:27,598
‪我说:“噢 这娘们儿不识字!

230
00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:33,687
‪你妈她不识字 朋友!”

231
00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:43,197
‪我没在批评什么啊 事实就是这样!

232
00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:46,450
‪就是他妈不识字

233
00:13:49,370 --> 00:13:53,374
‪然后我想打开
‪《电力公司》给她点线索

234
00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:56,627
‪“早上 餐点 早餐”

235
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:04,009
‪你们以为在特殊教育班

236
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:07,179
‪是不可能有种族主义的

237
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:12,977
‪在特殊教育班不可能有歧视

238
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,020
‪因为这个系统

239
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:17,982
‪本来就应该是特别的 婊贝

240
00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,943
‪但不是那种:“噢 他们真是不一般”

241
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:23,028
‪就是:“噢 他们不太一般哈”

242
00:14:24,154 --> 00:14:26,782
‪我们都被写在了“废物”名单上

243
00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:30,828
‪这个系统里的每一个人
‪都被列入了被抛弃的名单

244
00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:33,080
‪我们每个人都在吃药

245
00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,291
‪但他们没让我吃药

246
00:14:39,086 --> 00:14:42,172
‪有位老师 麦金尼先生...

247
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,218
‪麦金尼先生是个白人

248
00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:48,679
‪他是个特别“白”的白人

249
00:14:54,518 --> 00:14:57,229
‪白人在想:“婊贝
‪特别‘白’的白人是什么?”

250
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,941
‪就是不喜欢黑人的白人

251
00:15:02,026 --> 00:15:03,569
‪特别“白”的白人

252
00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:07,531
‪我当时才上七年级 宝贝

253
00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:11,160
‪大家得明白
‪我来到这个世界时保有的精神

254
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:14,872
‪我他妈就是带着这种精神来的
‪我可不光是惹事

255
00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:17,791
‪我是带着他妈的“拼搏”精神来的

256
00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:20,753
‪我带着这种精神而来:
‪“如果事情不对 婊贝 那就拼了”

257
00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:24,173
‪我是带着这种精神来的 对吧?

258
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:27,968
‪有一天 我们坐在教室里

259
00:15:28,469 --> 00:15:30,930
‪麦金尼先生站起身说:“听好了

260
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:36,560
‪如果我叫到你的名字
‪就到教室右边去

261
00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:40,606
‪如果我没叫到你的名字

262
00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:44,568
‪就到教室左边去”

263
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:49,573
‪就这么一个破左右
‪就花了我们20分钟时间

264
00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:56,205
‪我他妈玩得非常开心 “哪边?”

265
00:15:57,706 --> 00:15:58,582
‪对吧?

266
00:15:58,582 --> 00:16:01,043
‪等大家都各就各位了

267
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:05,130
‪我注意到所有的白人小孩

268
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,424
‪都在右边

269
00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:12,388
‪而所有的黑人小孩都他妈在左边

270
00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:17,977
‪他跟白人小孩说:
‪“听着 你们都有彩色书本

271
00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:20,562
‪字谜游戏

272
00:16:20,562 --> 00:16:21,939
‪以及积木

273
00:16:22,731 --> 00:16:24,400
‪你们可以做那些项目”

274
00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:27,403
‪接着他走到了我们面前

275
00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:31,573
‪他说:“至于这边的这个小组...”

276
00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:34,660
‪当那个混蛋说“这个小组...”时

277
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:37,538
‪噢 马尔科姆艾克斯说:
‪“婊贝 该你上场了”

278
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:41,583
‪“...这边的这个小组

279
00:16:42,084 --> 00:16:44,920
‪我会教你们如何用正确的语法说话”

280
00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:47,631
‪我他妈举起手来

281
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:52,011
‪麦金尼先生说:“什么事 莫妮枯?”

282
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,812
‪因为老娘不叫那个名字

283
00:17:03,564 --> 00:17:05,816
‪所以老娘继续举着手

284
00:17:11,655 --> 00:17:15,034
‪然后那个老白男看着我说:
‪“什么事 莫妮克?”

285
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,619
‪我说:“我得去趟办公室”

286
00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:21,623
‪他说:“你为什么要去办公室?”
‪“这样我才能打电话给我爸爸”

287
00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:23,792
‪他说:“你要打电话给你爸爸干嘛?”

288
00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:26,837
‪“这样我才能告诉他你在班里搞分裂

289
00:17:26,837 --> 00:17:29,840
‪你让白人小孩在那边
‪黑人小孩在这边

290
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:32,009
‪你说你要教我们怎么说话

291
00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:34,928
‪而且小提米刚刚喝了一整瓶胶水”

292
00:17:40,184 --> 00:17:43,979
‪宝贝 那个老白男看着我说:

293
00:17:43,979 --> 00:17:47,733
‪“小妮子 要是
‪我现在能戴上我的面罩...”

294
00:17:49,777 --> 00:17:51,445
‪然后他一直盯着我

295
00:17:51,445 --> 00:17:54,865
‪先祖们曾说过:“婊贝 瞪着丫的

296
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:57,076
‪不要挪开眼

297
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,661
‪别他妈眨眼睛”

298
00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:09,671
‪然后他说:“所有人都回自己的座位”

299
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:11,924
‪好吧 这他妈才对嘛

300
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:15,719
‪那个白人不喜欢我 但老娘坐在前面

301
00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:19,139
‪因为我要他丫每天都看着老娘

302
00:18:19,139 --> 00:18:21,934
‪因为我知道他丫有多狡猾 宝贝

303
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,769
‪我可不会忍气吞声

304
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:26,939
‪要是被我知道你有越矩行为
‪妈的 我他妈见一次

305
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:28,649
‪就要跟你据理力争一次

306
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:31,360
‪我在念七年级

307
00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:37,282
‪我遇到了一些美好的人

308
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,243
‪我得把话说清楚啊 宝贝

309
00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:42,579
‪我遇到了一些大家认为很特殊
‪但是很美好的人

310
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,749
‪在他们自己的故事和历史中

311
00:18:45,749 --> 00:18:49,211
‪他们是那么美好

312
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:50,295
‪那么精彩

313
00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:54,550
‪我坐在那间教室里 被这些人的美好

314
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:56,677
‪惊艳得无以复加

315
00:18:56,677 --> 00:18:58,554
‪我坐在前排

316
00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:01,098
‪我坐在两个女泼皮旁边

317
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:04,685
‪噢 大家都知道
‪老娘最忍不了的就是霸凌

318
00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:07,104
‪可这俩女泼皮一直在取笑

319
00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:09,148
‪后面戴头盔的那个小婊贝

320
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:13,861
‪可后面戴头盔的小婊贝没惹过任何人

321
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,405
‪她一直以来都非常友善
‪她说话都这样

322
00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:18,615
‪我进教室时 她这样...我这样...

323
00:19:20,868 --> 00:19:24,538
‪我们就是这样交流的 温馨美好

324
00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:28,083
‪我从没问过头盔的事

325
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,878
‪她也从没说过什么 我们其乐融融

326
00:19:30,878 --> 00:19:34,423
‪所以这两个女泼皮
‪想欺负戴头盔的小婊贝

327
00:19:34,423 --> 00:19:36,049
‪这老娘可忍不了

328
00:19:36,049 --> 00:19:38,302
‪整整一周 她们都在逼叨逼叨

329
00:19:38,302 --> 00:19:41,513
‪说她们要怎么整后面那个戴着头盔

330
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,056
‪箍着下巴带的小婊贝

331
00:19:43,056 --> 00:19:46,185
‪我坐在那儿就想:
‪“不 老娘可不会让这种事情发生”

332
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:48,896
‪我要插手

333
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:52,107
‪等到星期四

334
00:19:52,691 --> 00:19:54,860
‪我要对付这俩女泼皮

335
00:19:57,404 --> 00:19:59,323
‪我们都是特殊人群 小妞

336
00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:02,951
‪好吧?

337
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:07,039
‪老娘已经在摩拳擦掌了 好吗?
‪老娘已经在摩拳擦掌了

338
00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:08,957
‪于是我跟领头的那泼皮说

339
00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:11,752
‪先搞定领头的泼皮 再去搞跟屁虫

340
00:20:11,752 --> 00:20:14,630
‪她们这俩泼皮 其中一个是领头的

341
00:20:14,630 --> 00:20:17,841
‪另一个是个跟屁虫 领头泼皮说什么

342
00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:19,927
‪跟屁虫泼皮都会说:“嗯哼”

343
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:22,554
‪这种事让老娘怒火中烧

344
00:20:24,431 --> 00:20:27,559
‪等到了星期四 大家准备放学回家了

345
00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:32,022
‪我准备好了让这俩女泼皮知道
‪老娘是不会容忍这种事情的

346
00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:34,942
‪我会让这个小姐妹知道
‪你们准备要整

347
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,610
‪带着头盔的妹子了

348
00:20:37,110 --> 00:20:38,654
‪我要去找她们

349
00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:40,656
‪我说:“听好了

350
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,784
‪我明天会告诉她

351
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:47,287
‪你们要整她
‪就因为她戴着那个该死的头盔”

352
00:20:47,788 --> 00:20:49,957
‪我想着我已经震慑到领头的泼皮了

353
00:20:49,957 --> 00:20:52,251
‪跟她说些狠话

354
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:56,338
‪那个泼皮看着我说:
‪“你个肥猪大弱智

355
00:20:56,338 --> 00:20:58,757
‪你要是再不滚开...”

356
00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:02,678
‪我说:“噢!这和我想的回答不一样...

357
00:21:03,428 --> 00:21:06,974
‪噢 这娘们儿出人意料!”

358
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:14,731
‪你们都看到了

359
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:24,825
‪我没有想到 这两个女泼皮

360
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,493
‪是从巴尔的摩东区来的

361
00:21:27,661 --> 00:21:31,623
‪巴尔的摩的人都知道
‪巴尔的摩东区的人全都战斗力爆棚!

362
00:21:32,916 --> 00:21:36,044
‪那些人战斗力惊人
‪他们会把人踩在地上

363
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:42,759
‪于是我转身回去
‪我跟天杀的伊丽莎白说:

364
00:21:42,759 --> 00:21:44,303
‪“听好了 伊丽莎白

365
00:21:44,803 --> 00:21:48,181
‪那两个女泼皮一直在说你的坏话

366
00:21:48,181 --> 00:21:50,309
‪整整一个星期都是

367
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:54,479
‪等她们回来 你得先把欧莱莎拿下

368
00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:56,982
‪你得先把她揍趴下

369
00:21:56,982 --> 00:22:01,695
‪她回来一问你头盔的事情

370
00:22:02,738 --> 00:22:04,489
‪你就这样看着那个贱人...

371
00:22:05,449 --> 00:22:08,201
‪然后把你戴着头盔的脑袋往后仰

372
00:22:08,201 --> 00:22:10,579
‪然后狠狠撞向那贱人的嘴巴

373
00:22:11,079 --> 00:22:13,665
‪拿出你吃奶的力气来 婊贝

374
00:22:13,665 --> 00:22:16,668
‪死命撞她的嘴巴 把她牙撞掉”

375
00:22:16,668 --> 00:22:18,545
‪那小婊贝看着我说...

376
00:22:27,179 --> 00:22:29,389
‪我说:“什么意思?”

377
00:22:30,474 --> 00:22:35,812
‪我停下来看着那小婊贝说:
‪“老娘欣赏你 婊贝!”

378
00:22:35,812 --> 00:22:40,609
‪老娘非常欣赏那段嘶吼 婊贝

379
00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:46,239
‪然后麦金尼先生说...

380
00:22:48,158 --> 00:22:50,494
‪“伊丽莎白 别再笑了”

381
00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:55,791
‪我心想:“噢 这婊贝的笑声是这样?

382
00:22:56,917 --> 00:22:59,920
‪噢 婊贝 我们一定会
‪相处得很愉快的!”

383
00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:06,885
‪从那天起

384
00:23:08,303 --> 00:23:09,471
‪直到现在

385
00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:14,851
‪伊丽莎白和我一直是最亲密的好闺蜜

386
00:23:21,149 --> 00:23:23,193
‪一切的美好就是从这里开始的

387
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:26,029
‪戴着那个头盔

388
00:23:26,863 --> 00:23:28,365
‪伊丽莎白不能说话

389
00:23:29,741 --> 00:23:32,577
‪她不会说话

390
00:23:33,245 --> 00:23:37,374
‪也不会笑
‪因为我们都知道笑声是什么样的

391
00:23:38,708 --> 00:23:41,545
‪但当她摘下头盔后

392
00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:45,340
‪她说话就和你我一样

393
00:23:45,340 --> 00:23:46,925
‪口齿清晰

394
00:23:47,676 --> 00:23:52,389
‪她只是无法控制她的颈部

395
00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:22,169
‪九年级的一天

396
00:24:22,794 --> 00:24:25,714
‪她在卫生间里叫了我的名字
‪让我倍感荣幸

397
00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:28,300
‪因为我们都知道我们即将各奔东西

398
00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:30,469
‪我们的友谊不会再像从前那样

399
00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:32,888
‪因为我们都太小了
‪无法让我们的父母

400
00:24:32,888 --> 00:24:34,347
‪带我们去见见对方

401
00:24:34,347 --> 00:24:38,059
‪九年级的时候 她在卫生间里叫住我

402
00:24:38,059 --> 00:24:42,606
‪她对我这样比着
‪意思是说:“给我一秒钟”

403
00:24:43,231 --> 00:24:46,234
‪她解开了那条该死的下巴带

404
00:24:47,319 --> 00:24:49,946
‪摘下了那个天杀的头盔

405
00:24:50,447 --> 00:24:51,740
‪然后说:“莫妮克...”

406
00:24:55,285 --> 00:24:57,370
‪我说:“婊贝 什么?”

407
00:24:59,206 --> 00:25:02,417
‪噢 我们当时笑得上气不接下气!

408
00:25:02,417 --> 00:25:05,670
‪那婊贝说:
‪“不戴那该死的头盔 我是能说话的”

409
00:25:16,014 --> 00:25:17,098
‪要知道...

410
00:25:19,059 --> 00:25:20,727
‪我是在

411
00:25:21,811 --> 00:25:25,982
‪真正的黑人街区长大的

412
00:25:26,816 --> 00:25:29,069
‪我希望你们能明白 宝贝

413
00:25:29,069 --> 00:25:31,571
‪我是在马里兰州巴尔的摩市

414
00:25:31,571 --> 00:25:33,740
‪真正的黑人街区

415
00:25:33,740 --> 00:25:35,992
‪一个传统家庭里长大的

416
00:25:35,992 --> 00:25:38,870
‪在真正的黑人街区 第一条规矩就是

417
00:25:38,870 --> 00:25:41,873
‪人不犯我 我不犯人

418
00:25:41,873 --> 00:25:46,127
‪因为你不知道自己招惹的是什么人
‪你可能会被收拾得很惨

419
00:25:46,711 --> 00:25:49,548
‪这就是真正的黑人街区的规矩

420
00:25:49,548 --> 00:25:52,634
‪就是让你们知道一下我的出身 宝贝

421
00:25:52,634 --> 00:25:55,303
‪我出身于真正的黑人街区

422
00:25:55,303 --> 00:25:58,974
‪所以有些人找架打的时候
‪他们不知道老娘也是会还手的

423
00:25:58,974 --> 00:26:01,977
‪他们不知道
‪老娘是从刚果来的 朋友们

424
00:26:01,977 --> 00:26:04,062
‪姐可是女金刚

425
00:26:08,817 --> 00:26:09,651
‪要知道...

426
00:26:11,653 --> 00:26:13,196
‪我有个唐纳德舅舅

427
00:26:16,032 --> 00:26:18,410
‪我的唐纳德舅舅非常了不起

428
00:26:19,077 --> 00:26:20,537
‪非常厉害

429
00:26:21,246 --> 00:26:23,707
‪我的唐纳德舅舅非常 非常黑

430
00:26:24,374 --> 00:26:26,293
‪非常 非常弯

431
00:26:27,377 --> 00:26:30,922
‪当你出生于1930和1940年代
‪并且非常 非常黑

432
00:26:30,922 --> 00:26:32,882
‪还非常 非常弯的时候

433
00:26:32,882 --> 00:26:36,886
‪朋友们 你要面对的
‪各种打击简直骇人听闻

434
00:26:36,886 --> 00:26:39,931
‪因为如果你非常 非常黑
‪还非常 非常弯

435
00:26:39,931 --> 00:26:43,018
‪你自己的家人
‪都不会愿意和你沾上任何关系

436
00:26:43,018 --> 00:26:45,895
‪我看着他们孤立了我的唐纳德舅舅

437
00:26:46,646 --> 00:26:48,398
‪虽然同住一个屋檐下

438
00:26:48,398 --> 00:26:51,443
‪但我看着他们把他扫地出门了

439
00:26:51,443 --> 00:26:53,945
‪但该死的 他让我看了那么多好戏

440
00:26:53,945 --> 00:26:58,199
‪因为每个星期五
‪我妈妈都会去她妈妈家

441
00:26:58,199 --> 00:26:59,576
‪去打牌

442
00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:03,663
‪在我说这些人都是赌徒时
‪我想你们能听进去

443
00:27:03,663 --> 00:27:06,041
‪这些人都是赌徒

444
00:27:06,041 --> 00:27:11,087
‪我从小和瘾君子、
‪赌徒、酒鬼、妓女生活在一起

445
00:27:11,087 --> 00:27:15,008
‪我舅妈现在绝对不会承认
‪但我知道她曾经出卖自己的肉体

446
00:27:15,008 --> 00:27:18,053
‪给一个保险男
‪因为那人一来就会到楼上去

447
00:27:18,053 --> 00:27:21,056
‪“你丫卖的是什么保险 小子?”

448
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:25,018
‪然后她看着我说:
‪“租房保险 小妞” 那好吧

449
00:27:26,019 --> 00:27:27,604
‪我就是在这些人身边长大的

450
00:27:28,104 --> 00:27:30,565
‪他们坐在餐桌上 宝贝

451
00:27:30,565 --> 00:27:33,777
‪我的意思是 桌子中间放着很多钱

452
00:27:33,777 --> 00:27:35,695
‪扑克配对、唐克、美国扑克

453
00:27:35,695 --> 00:27:39,783
‪只要能拿来赌的 他们都不会放过

454
00:27:39,783 --> 00:27:41,868
‪而且大家的生活都很拮据

455
00:27:42,452 --> 00:27:45,121
‪所以他们都是拿些
‪自己并没有的东西来赌博

456
00:27:45,121 --> 00:27:48,625
‪参与者有他们的母亲
‪以及她所有的孩子

457
00:27:49,125 --> 00:27:51,711
‪所以我第一次见到这种事时

458
00:27:51,711 --> 00:27:53,713
‪在夜晚结束时他们会说:

459
00:27:53,713 --> 00:27:57,092
‪“好了 大家算算账
‪把钱收好 我们今天玩得很开心”

460
00:27:57,092 --> 00:27:59,511
‪他们说:“老表 你输了 老表”

461
00:28:03,348 --> 00:28:04,766
‪每个星期五

462
00:28:05,433 --> 00:28:06,643
‪我的唐纳德舅舅

463
00:28:07,227 --> 00:28:08,687
‪都会去酒吧

464
00:28:09,229 --> 00:28:11,356
‪每个星期五 三个黑人 一直是他们仨

465
00:28:11,356 --> 00:28:14,234
‪每周五都会揍他一顿

466
00:28:14,234 --> 00:28:17,320
‪拿走他的钱
‪然后把醉醺醺的他送回家

467
00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:19,739
‪我最敬重酒吧那些人的一点

468
00:28:19,739 --> 00:28:21,950
‪就是他们从来不会
‪把他揍一顿 然后抢光光

469
00:28:21,950 --> 00:28:25,370
‪他们会打他一顿
‪然后只拿走够那天晚上喝酒以及

470
00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:26,705
‪打车回家的钱

471
00:28:26,705 --> 00:28:28,415
‪他们都是有礼貌的酒鬼 朋友们

472
00:28:28,415 --> 00:28:31,626
‪他们没有把我舅舅揍一顿
‪然后让他一无所有地回家

473
00:28:32,127 --> 00:28:33,837
‪他走进家里

474
00:28:33,837 --> 00:28:37,340
‪每个星期五都他妈是这样

475
00:28:37,340 --> 00:28:41,177
‪我坐在餐厅的椅子上 他们在打着牌

476
00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:43,680
‪他从前门走到厨房里

477
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:45,849
‪距离不远 前门...

478
00:28:47,976 --> 00:28:49,144
‪朋友们 厨房

479
00:28:49,811 --> 00:28:53,231
‪在这中间的就是餐厅 好吧?

480
00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:56,151
‪他走进厨房

481
00:28:56,151 --> 00:28:57,902
‪然后拿出一根热狗

482
00:28:57,902 --> 00:29:03,825
‪从袋子里拿出一根热狗
‪用叉子叉住 朋友们

483
00:29:03,825 --> 00:29:06,494
‪不是放到锅里煎

484
00:29:06,494 --> 00:29:08,580
‪是用叉子叉住 然后打开火

485
00:29:08,580 --> 00:29:13,376
‪然后就叉着那根热狗放在火上

486
00:29:13,376 --> 00:29:15,003
‪我心想:“开始吧 舅舅

487
00:29:15,003 --> 00:29:17,964
‪这一幕的每分每秒我都超喜欢”

488
00:29:17,964 --> 00:29:20,049
‪然后他会开始咒骂那些

489
00:29:20,049 --> 00:29:22,927
‪在酒吧揍他的人

490
00:29:22,927 --> 00:29:26,181
‪“下周五 我他妈要把你们全打趴下

491
00:29:26,181 --> 00:29:30,351
‪你们惹错人了 我是唐纳德
‪我要把所有人打得落花流水

492
00:29:30,351 --> 00:29:32,479
‪我要揍扁你们 我要揍扁你们的老婆

493
00:29:32,479 --> 00:29:33,813
‪我要揍扁所有人”

494
00:29:33,813 --> 00:29:36,483
‪我说:“对 唐纳德舅舅 揍他们”

495
00:29:36,483 --> 00:29:39,110
‪不过我是一边看戏
‪一边在脑子里说的

496
00:29:39,110 --> 00:29:43,198
‪然后我姥姥说:
‪“唐纳德 这些屁话我已经听够了

497
00:29:43,198 --> 00:29:45,033
‪也许如果这些话你去对着他们说

498
00:29:45,033 --> 00:29:48,244
‪他们就不会每周五都揍你
‪你也能把钱保住了!

499
00:29:48,244 --> 00:29:50,079
‪现在 你丫快闭嘴吧!”

500
00:29:51,915 --> 00:29:55,502
‪我的唐纳德舅舅走出厨房

501
00:29:55,502 --> 00:30:00,089
‪朋友们 酒醒了
‪居高临下地站在我姥姥面前

502
00:30:00,089 --> 00:30:03,843
‪也就是他老妈 然后说:“妈妈

503
00:30:03,843 --> 00:30:06,095
‪我屌你!”

504
00:30:07,347 --> 00:30:09,307
‪我也是这种反应

505
00:30:10,809 --> 00:30:13,603
‪但我看戏看得非常开心!

506
00:30:13,603 --> 00:30:14,979
‪所以 李丹尼尔斯 听好了

507
00:30:14,979 --> 00:30:18,066
‪那晚我说:
‪“老娘要是有的话 我他妈就屌你了”

508
00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:20,693
‪那是在向我舅舅唐纳德致敬 朋友!

509
00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:25,365
‪那是我在对我的唐纳德舅舅说:
‪“老舅 你依然在我心里!”

510
00:30:28,535 --> 00:30:29,744
‪是的 宝贝!

511
00:30:30,245 --> 00:30:33,623
‪那就是我的唐纳德舅舅
‪李 那就是我的唐纳德舅舅!

512
00:30:34,123 --> 00:30:37,252
‪当我跟你们说 我是被几个
‪坚强的黑人女性抚养长大的

513
00:30:37,252 --> 00:30:38,545
‪请听我说

514
00:30:39,045 --> 00:30:42,632
‪我是被几个
‪坚强的黑人女性抚养长大的

515
00:30:42,632 --> 00:30:45,218
‪我所说的那种力量

516
00:30:45,218 --> 00:30:46,511
‪堪称不可思议

517
00:30:46,511 --> 00:30:47,929
‪不容小觑

518
00:30:47,929 --> 00:30:51,057
‪我是被几个
‪非常坚强的黑人女性抚养长大的

519
00:30:51,057 --> 00:30:52,976
‪她们非常坚强

520
00:30:52,976 --> 00:30:54,394
‪非常不合时宜

521
00:30:54,394 --> 00:30:55,854
‪非常凄惨

522
00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:57,313
‪非常痛苦

523
00:30:57,313 --> 00:30:59,816
‪非常愤怒 又非常聪明

524
00:30:59,816 --> 00:31:01,526
‪她们集以上所有于一身

525
00:31:01,526 --> 00:31:03,486
‪她们坚不可摧

526
00:31:03,987 --> 00:31:05,196
‪直到她们行差踏错

527
00:31:08,157 --> 00:31:10,702
‪所以当时我目睹着那一切

528
00:31:11,202 --> 00:31:12,328
‪作为一个小姑娘

529
00:31:12,829 --> 00:31:15,248
‪你们觉得我会变成一个怎样的女人?

530
00:31:15,748 --> 00:31:19,544
‪你们觉得我为一个男人
‪变成了一个什么样女人?

531
00:31:24,465 --> 00:31:26,926
‪你们想跟我说女强人?

532
00:31:27,427 --> 00:31:30,763
‪如果你们翻开词典 查一下“女强人”

533
00:31:30,763 --> 00:31:33,975
‪那个字块上贴的就是老娘的照片

534
00:31:37,812 --> 00:31:40,398
‪因为我从小接受的就是这种教育

535
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:44,027
‪我爸爸跟我说:
‪“谁赚钱 谁就说了算”

536
00:31:44,027 --> 00:31:47,071
‪而一直以来都是老娘在赚钱

537
00:31:47,071 --> 00:31:50,283
‪所以一切老娘说了算

538
00:31:50,783 --> 00:31:52,577
‪这没什么可说的

539
00:31:52,577 --> 00:31:56,080
‪这就是这段感情中被加注的能量

540
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:58,166
‪以下是真实发生过的对话

541
00:31:58,166 --> 00:32:00,084
‪“那我们九点见

542
00:32:04,088 --> 00:32:05,924
‪车三点钟去接你”

543
00:32:06,549 --> 00:32:08,176
‪大家心照不宣

544
00:32:08,676 --> 00:32:09,802
‪我就是那样

545
00:32:10,303 --> 00:32:13,306
‪所以我结了三次婚

546
00:32:15,016 --> 00:32:17,685
‪别说:“嗯 朋友”
‪别对我评头论足 别那样做

547
00:32:17,685 --> 00:32:18,895
‪别那样做

548
00:32:20,355 --> 00:32:21,606
‪三段婚姻

549
00:32:22,899 --> 00:32:24,317
‪这是我的最后一段

550
00:32:25,193 --> 00:32:27,278
‪但其实也是我的第一段

551
00:32:27,779 --> 00:32:30,239
‪因为这是我第一次知道了自己

552
00:32:30,740 --> 00:32:32,533
‪作为一个黑人妻子的地位

553
00:32:33,326 --> 00:32:34,827
‪我们中有很多人都不知道

554
00:32:36,746 --> 00:32:40,833
‪我必须学习 我无意批评什么 朋友们
‪我必须学习自己该怎么做

555
00:32:40,833 --> 00:32:42,710
‪因为我会穿上我的超人披风

556
00:32:43,211 --> 00:32:45,630
‪我会让那玩意儿飘起来 宝贝

557
00:32:45,630 --> 00:32:49,425
‪我还记得
‪当我不得不让我的披风退休的情形

558
00:32:49,425 --> 00:32:54,681
‪一切对我来说就像昨天一样
‪因为我每天都是以女强人模式开启的

559
00:32:54,681 --> 00:32:57,183
‪我一睁开眼就在运筹帷幄

560
00:32:57,183 --> 00:32:59,686
‪那是《帕克家族》的最后一季

561
00:33:00,186 --> 00:33:02,522
‪我是热门电视剧的主演之一

562
00:33:02,522 --> 00:33:04,190
‪-对 没错
‪-来吧 朋友们

563
00:33:06,609 --> 00:33:08,027
‪来啊 朋友们

564
00:33:11,698 --> 00:33:13,866
‪我们是帕克家族

565
00:33:13,866 --> 00:33:15,743
‪很好 宝贝!

566
00:33:20,915 --> 00:33:21,958
‪我起床了

567
00:33:22,792 --> 00:33:25,920
‪我到岗的时间是早上八点

568
00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:28,256
‪我六点就起来了

569
00:33:28,756 --> 00:33:30,174
‪我洗了个澡

570
00:33:31,217 --> 00:33:33,928
‪我进去和孩子们玩了一会儿

571
00:33:34,429 --> 00:33:36,472
‪我回来亲了一下我老公

572
00:33:36,973 --> 00:33:40,435
‪我说:“爸爸 等我从片场回来见”

573
00:33:40,935 --> 00:33:43,229
‪他说:“妈妈 祝你今天愉快”

574
00:33:43,730 --> 00:33:49,360
‪我坐进我的豪华双座奔驰敞篷车

575
00:33:50,611 --> 00:33:53,656
‪作为女人 我块头可能有点大
‪但老娘不在乎

576
00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:00,580
‪我在车里挤作一团

577
00:34:05,334 --> 00:34:09,672
‪我去到片场
‪跟你们解释一下片场情况

578
00:34:09,672 --> 00:34:13,009
‪这样你们才能理解
‪人们是如何迷失自我的

579
00:34:13,009 --> 00:34:15,303
‪我去到片场

580
00:34:15,303 --> 00:34:17,972
‪有个车位写着我的名字

581
00:34:18,473 --> 00:34:23,144
‪我还没把车停好
‪就有人把我的车门打开了

582
00:34:23,144 --> 00:34:26,647
‪把我需要的所有东西
‪从车上拿到了我的化妆间

583
00:34:26,647 --> 00:34:29,108
‪他们护送我去到我的化妆间

584
00:34:29,108 --> 00:34:31,611
‪然后 另一个人来到我的化妆间

585
00:34:31,611 --> 00:34:34,989
‪咚咚敲门 把我带去做头发还有化妆

586
00:34:34,989 --> 00:34:37,909
‪等我弄好头发 化完妆
‪又一个婊贝跑过来说:

587
00:34:37,909 --> 00:34:39,577
‪“衣柜已经为你准备好了”

588
00:34:39,577 --> 00:34:43,456
‪等我换好衣服 然后我他妈就上台了

589
00:34:43,456 --> 00:34:46,292
‪开始扮演那个可遇不可求的角色

590
00:34:46,292 --> 00:34:47,877
‪没有人能说 宝贝

591
00:34:47,877 --> 00:34:51,047
‪那个时候的生活是不美好的

592
00:34:51,047 --> 00:34:54,509
‪因为我所梦想的一切 都照进了现实

593
00:34:54,509 --> 00:34:57,136
‪等我们准备要回家时 已经是五点了

594
00:34:57,637 --> 00:35:02,225
‪片场部分制作人戴着那种小水晶饰品

595
00:35:02,725 --> 00:35:04,185
‪这些小水晶饰品

596
00:35:04,185 --> 00:35:07,063
‪跟风混蛋就会是这样的结果
‪我不是她

597
00:35:07,063 --> 00:35:09,774
‪我不是那种会花一万美元买个包的人

598
00:35:09,774 --> 00:35:11,776
‪我才不会去买些红鞋底

599
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:14,487
‪让我的脚疼得死去活来

600
00:35:14,487 --> 00:35:16,823
‪我整整两天都很火大

601
00:35:16,823 --> 00:35:19,450
‪因为我的小脚趾
‪还他妈在另一个脚趾上面

602
00:35:19,450 --> 00:35:21,369
‪而且我还没办法把丫弄下来

603
00:35:21,369 --> 00:35:24,664
‪老娘不是会做那种事的人 宝贝
‪我这人很简单

604
00:35:27,291 --> 00:35:28,292
‪好吧?

605
00:35:28,292 --> 00:35:30,753
‪但他们都有那种水晶小饰品

606
00:35:31,254 --> 00:35:33,840
‪我觉得他们是在给老娘压力

607
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:37,802
‪“你必须去
‪比佛利购物中心买那种水晶小饰品

608
00:35:37,802 --> 00:35:39,178
‪它太可爱了 是吧?”

609
00:35:39,178 --> 00:35:42,265
‪我是不喜欢这些的
‪但因为那些制作人都有

610
00:35:42,265 --> 00:35:44,725
‪老娘必须给自己弄个水晶饰品

611
00:35:44,725 --> 00:35:48,729
‪这样我才能追上大流 然后说:
‪“婊贝 我买了个水晶饰品哦”

612
00:35:49,230 --> 00:35:50,439
‪对吧?

613
00:35:50,439 --> 00:35:52,108
‪于是我上了车

614
00:35:52,900 --> 00:35:56,445
‪我要去比佛利购物中心
‪商店就在那里面

615
00:35:58,281 --> 00:36:00,199
‪我打电话给我老公 我说:“爸爸

616
00:36:00,867 --> 00:36:03,536
‪我先去趟比佛利购物中心再回家

617
00:36:03,536 --> 00:36:06,581
‪我得去趟饰品店” 他说:“逛街愉快

618
00:36:06,581 --> 00:36:09,917
‪慢慢逛” “好嘞 婊贝 回家见”

619
00:36:09,917 --> 00:36:12,753
‪等我上了车 拿出了我的大麻香烟

620
00:36:12,753 --> 00:36:15,006
‪我先说明一下

621
00:36:15,006 --> 00:36:17,800
‪因为你们都想知道
‪我有没有抽大麻?当然有

622
00:36:19,343 --> 00:36:21,012
‪这是上帝的馈赠

623
00:36:22,138 --> 00:36:26,142
‪这是耶稣的指令!

624
00:36:26,642 --> 00:36:27,560
‪对吧?

625
00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:30,897
‪我买的是极品
‪我是不会在街上找小混混买的

626
00:36:30,897 --> 00:36:32,815
‪我都是买医药级别的

627
00:36:32,815 --> 00:36:36,027
‪老娘在合法之前就在用医药级别的了

628
00:36:36,027 --> 00:36:37,904
‪千真万确

629
00:36:37,904 --> 00:36:39,614
‪所以我买的是好东西 好吧?

630
00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:42,992
‪你去找大麻医生时
‪他说:“莫妮克 哪儿不对劲了?”

631
00:36:43,492 --> 00:36:44,702
‪我说:“所有一切

632
00:36:47,955 --> 00:36:51,167
‪把你最好的货给我
‪所有事都让我很闹心”

633
00:36:51,167 --> 00:36:55,671
‪噢 他给我的货让人叫绝

634
00:36:55,671 --> 00:36:57,965
‪好吧?于是我拿了一点大麻出来

635
00:36:57,965 --> 00:37:00,635
‪我把它拿出来 放在我的秘密夹层里

636
00:37:00,635 --> 00:37:04,138
‪因为我知道
‪在比佛利购物中心会有代客泊车

637
00:37:04,138 --> 00:37:08,351
‪比佛利购物中心的代客泊车
‪我必须吸取教训

638
00:37:08,351 --> 00:37:11,187
‪因为如果你把大麻留在烟灰缸里

639
00:37:11,187 --> 00:37:13,606
‪那些混蛋就会把你的大麻抽掉

640
00:37:13,606 --> 00:37:16,734
‪等他们帮你把车开回来
‪他们看着你时就是一副

641
00:37:16,734 --> 00:37:18,569
‪“我吸嗨了!” 的样子

642
00:37:19,445 --> 00:37:20,655
‪所以有代客泊车时

643
00:37:21,364 --> 00:37:24,325
‪我会把我的大麻放在特殊的夹层里

644
00:37:24,325 --> 00:37:26,077
‪我下了车

645
00:37:26,077 --> 00:37:27,536
‪直奔饰品店

646
00:37:27,536 --> 00:37:29,914
‪那里有各种各样的水晶饰品

647
00:37:29,914 --> 00:37:31,832
‪我进去的时候只有我一个人

648
00:37:31,832 --> 00:37:34,043
‪还有个在那儿工作的白人女售货员

649
00:37:34,043 --> 00:37:36,420
‪我进去时 那个贱人没有跟我打招呼

650
00:37:36,420 --> 00:37:38,547
‪这自然是有问题的

651
00:37:38,547 --> 00:37:40,716
‪你应该要说:“你好 欢迎光临”

652
00:37:40,716 --> 00:37:44,887
‪但我想:“不管这个贱人了
‪老娘要去买水晶饰品

653
00:37:44,887 --> 00:37:48,307
‪因为所有的制作人都他妈有水晶饰品

654
00:37:48,307 --> 00:37:50,393
‪所以我必须忍受她的态度”

655
00:37:50,393 --> 00:37:51,727
‪于是我走过去

656
00:37:52,561 --> 00:37:56,232
‪我看到几个小水晶河马

657
00:37:57,233 --> 00:38:01,279
‪噢 宝贝 我觉得河马是丛林中

658
00:38:01,279 --> 00:38:02,905
‪最性感的动物

659
00:38:02,905 --> 00:38:05,408
‪你们注意过河马走路吗?

660
00:38:05,408 --> 00:38:07,618
‪你们注意过那家伙走路的样子吗?

661
00:38:07,618 --> 00:38:09,704
‪它走路时总是:“宝贝 来啊

662
00:38:12,707 --> 00:38:15,418
‪宝贝 我准备好了 宝贝”

663
00:38:16,252 --> 00:38:19,338
‪所以 当我老公跟我说
‪“把那只河马弄过来”时

664
00:38:19,338 --> 00:38:21,632
‪“宝贝 快来拿啊!”

665
00:38:23,509 --> 00:38:24,552
‪美极了

666
00:38:25,052 --> 00:38:26,637
‪我看了一下价格

667
00:38:26,637 --> 00:38:30,182
‪标价写的是525美元

668
00:38:30,182 --> 00:38:32,935
‪那玩意儿差不多这么大

669
00:38:33,436 --> 00:38:36,397
‪于是我想:
‪“好了 莫妮克 不要被这个价格吓到

670
00:38:36,397 --> 00:38:38,649
‪婊贝 你可是热门电视剧的主演之一

671
00:38:38,649 --> 00:38:43,154
‪一个525美元的
‪水晶饰品你还是买得起的”

672
00:38:43,654 --> 00:38:45,906
‪当我走到收银台...

673
00:38:47,908 --> 00:38:49,535
‪那位白人女士帮我结账

674
00:38:49,535 --> 00:38:52,955
‪她从始至终都没有跟我有过眼神接触

675
00:38:52,955 --> 00:38:56,917
‪她就是扫描结账然后说:“5025美元”

676
00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:00,504
‪我说:“抱歉 你说什么?”

677
00:39:03,049 --> 00:39:04,508
‪然后她又说了一遍:

678
00:39:04,508 --> 00:39:07,470
‪“我就知道你这个黑妹买不起它”

679
00:39:07,470 --> 00:39:11,682
‪她说:“5025美元”

680
00:39:12,183 --> 00:39:15,603
‪我得让那个贱人知道
‪我不是惠...那女的叫什么来着?

681
00:39:15,603 --> 00:39:17,521
‪《不同的世界》里的惠特莉吉尔伯特

682
00:39:17,521 --> 00:39:19,982
‪她必须证明自己买得起那玩意儿

683
00:39:19,982 --> 00:39:21,859
‪婊贝 去你妈的 我不要了 谢谢

684
00:39:21,859 --> 00:39:25,237
‪祝你今天愉快
‪快把那玩意儿放回去吧

685
00:39:26,238 --> 00:39:28,032
‪因为老娘要回家了

686
00:39:28,532 --> 00:39:30,034
‪我抽着我的大麻

687
00:39:31,077 --> 00:39:33,120
‪我买的大麻

688
00:39:34,246 --> 00:39:35,998
‪会让人觉得很饥渴

689
00:39:36,999 --> 00:39:38,084
‪跟上我的思路

690
00:39:39,293 --> 00:39:41,087
‪你们都在想:“噢呀呀 婊贝”

691
00:39:42,213 --> 00:39:44,799
‪它会让你的饥渴程度

692
00:39:46,008 --> 00:39:47,426
‪更上一层楼

693
00:39:47,927 --> 00:39:51,305
‪不是说你一抽完立刻就饥渴了
‪它会慢慢加剧

694
00:39:51,305 --> 00:39:53,140
‪所以我抽大麻都是

695
00:39:54,266 --> 00:39:55,434
‪有策略的

696
00:39:56,894 --> 00:39:59,021
‪因为我要回家了

697
00:39:59,605 --> 00:40:00,648
‪对吧?

698
00:40:01,148 --> 00:40:02,775
‪我到家后

699
00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:08,239
‪那玩意儿就会起效了
‪那玩意儿...起效了

700
00:40:08,739 --> 00:40:11,158
‪到家的时候 我差不多已经到七级了

701
00:40:11,659 --> 00:40:15,162
‪好吧?我还没到那种程度
‪还没有说:“快来嗨”

702
00:40:15,162 --> 00:40:18,499
‪我的状态是:“哦 要命”
‪你们懂我的意思吗?

703
00:40:18,499 --> 00:40:19,959
‪我是那个状态 好吧?

704
00:40:19,959 --> 00:40:22,962
‪那晚我回到家 差不多是七点钟

705
00:40:24,130 --> 00:40:27,341
‪我做的第一件事就是上楼
‪跟我男人打招呼

706
00:40:27,341 --> 00:40:29,969
‪这是我做的第一件事

707
00:40:29,969 --> 00:40:32,680
‪我去到了楼上

708
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:36,058
‪然后问候了我老公

709
00:40:36,058 --> 00:40:38,727
‪所有人都排在后面

710
00:40:38,727 --> 00:40:42,565
‪我外婆很久以前就跟我说过:
‪“你回家以后

711
00:40:42,565 --> 00:40:45,234
‪你老公一定是你第一个要去见的人

712
00:40:45,234 --> 00:40:48,487
‪而当他到家的时候
‪他也应该是你要见的第一个人”

713
00:40:48,487 --> 00:40:51,490
‪所以我遵守了这条规矩 我上楼去

714
00:40:51,490 --> 00:40:52,992
‪问候我老公

715
00:40:53,492 --> 00:40:55,953
‪然后我进去 问候了孩子们

716
00:40:55,953 --> 00:40:58,622
‪然后我下楼 跟家佣打招呼

717
00:40:59,123 --> 00:41:01,000
‪你们听到啦 朋友们 家佣

718
00:41:10,009 --> 00:41:13,345
‪然后我回到楼上
‪和孩子们又玩了一会儿

719
00:41:13,846 --> 00:41:16,015
‪接着我又下楼 然后又上楼

720
00:41:16,015 --> 00:41:17,391
‪我和席德又聊了一会儿

721
00:41:17,391 --> 00:41:19,768
‪接着我又下楼 然后又上楼

722
00:41:19,768 --> 00:41:21,270
‪然后 噢 婊贝

723
00:41:21,270 --> 00:41:24,273
‪大约20分钟后 十级到了

724
00:41:24,273 --> 00:41:26,192
‪老娘状态到了

725
00:41:26,192 --> 00:41:30,571
‪是时候翻云覆雨了

726
00:41:30,571 --> 00:41:33,449
‪这姑娘呢呢喃喃 哼着小曲

727
00:41:33,449 --> 00:41:35,910
‪哦 那只小猫正在抓挠

728
00:41:35,910 --> 00:41:37,786
‪呢喃轻吟 她在说话

729
00:41:49,965 --> 00:41:53,636
‪于是我进了卧室 关上门 宝贝

730
00:41:54,178 --> 00:41:56,472
‪我摆出了我最撩人的姿态

731
00:41:57,097 --> 00:41:58,891
‪你得把右边的屁股撅出来

732
00:41:59,391 --> 00:42:00,392
‪对吧?

733
00:42:00,392 --> 00:42:02,686
‪你得把嘴巴张开得恰到好处

734
00:42:02,686 --> 00:42:06,607
‪不是大到可以吹箫
‪但他可能觉得你会吹箫

735
00:42:20,287 --> 00:42:22,831
‪你得喘起来 稍微一点点 别过头

736
00:42:26,502 --> 00:42:29,630
‪我老公看着我说:
‪“妈妈 你在干嘛呢?”

737
00:42:34,802 --> 00:42:38,264
‪我说:“死鬼 我在撩你呢”

738
00:42:40,182 --> 00:42:42,685
‪我说:“我需要你快过来

739
00:42:43,644 --> 00:42:45,938
‪舔舔这颗棒棒糖”

740
00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:51,694
‪那个死鬼说:“不用了 谢谢”

741
00:42:56,448 --> 00:42:58,492
‪“你这回答可不对哦

742
00:42:58,492 --> 00:43:00,286
‪你不知道是老娘说的算吗 小子?

743
00:43:00,286 --> 00:43:04,498
‪你不知道这房子是我的
‪车子是我的 钱也是我的吗?”

744
00:43:04,498 --> 00:43:06,083
‪我在心里跟自己说:

745
00:43:06,083 --> 00:43:08,460
‪“小子 你丫是不是疯了?”

746
00:43:08,460 --> 00:43:10,337
‪于是我想:“我要再问这小子一次

747
00:43:10,337 --> 00:43:14,466
‪给他一个自省的机会”

748
00:43:14,466 --> 00:43:16,260
‪于是我恢复了刚刚的姿势

749
00:43:24,184 --> 00:43:25,728
‪“我要你

750
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:28,272
‪过来这边

751
00:43:28,897 --> 00:43:32,359
‪舔舔这颗棒棒糖”

752
00:43:34,194 --> 00:43:37,364
‪那小子说:“也许我说得不太清楚

753
00:43:38,407 --> 00:43:41,285
‪我刚刚说 ‘不用了 谢谢’”

754
00:43:41,785 --> 00:43:44,204
‪“现在老娘很受伤

755
00:43:44,204 --> 00:43:47,166
‪因为你两次都回答错了

756
00:43:47,166 --> 00:43:50,044
‪所以现在我要来硬的了
‪你丫是有什么毛病?

757
00:43:50,044 --> 00:43:53,130
‪在我楼上楼下跑的时候
‪是发生什么事了吗?

758
00:43:53,130 --> 00:43:56,175
‪有人打电话来了?你是什么情况?”

759
00:43:56,175 --> 00:43:58,010
‪他说:“我没什么情况啊”

760
00:43:58,010 --> 00:44:00,471
‪我说:“当我让你过来舔棒棒糖时

761
00:44:00,471 --> 00:44:03,891
‪你肯定是不对劲的”

762
00:44:03,891 --> 00:44:07,603
‪他说:“我一点问题都没有
‪不过我们聊聊这件事吧

763
00:44:07,603 --> 00:44:10,564
‪你早上七点就出门去了

764
00:44:10,564 --> 00:44:14,610
‪你在片场一直待到了五点钟

765
00:44:14,610 --> 00:44:17,029
‪然后你又去了比佛利购物中心

766
00:44:17,029 --> 00:44:18,781
‪然后你回到家

767
00:44:18,781 --> 00:44:24,328
‪你上楼 下楼 又上楼 又下楼

768
00:44:24,328 --> 00:44:26,372
‪现在你要我去舔那个棒棒糖?

769
00:44:26,372 --> 00:44:28,165
‪婊贝 不用了 谢谢”

770
00:44:35,756 --> 00:44:39,051
‪我说:“死鬼 这就是黑人的爱!

771
00:44:39,051 --> 00:44:43,013
‪你应该随时随地都能舔我!
‪这可不是黑人的作风!”

772
00:44:43,013 --> 00:44:45,766
‪现在我的感情受了伤
‪我准备气呼呼 欲求不满地出去

773
00:44:45,766 --> 00:44:48,143
‪他说:“你知道吗 莫妮克?
‪你知道吗?

774
00:44:48,143 --> 00:44:49,186
‪算了

775
00:44:49,687 --> 00:44:51,438
‪你过来吧”

776
00:44:51,939 --> 00:44:54,108
‪我对自己说:“你说得对

777
00:44:54,858 --> 00:44:57,152
‪你最好检讨一下自己 小子”

778
00:44:57,653 --> 00:44:58,946
‪许多男人

779
00:45:02,032 --> 00:45:04,034
‪我走到他面前

780
00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:06,078
‪我站在那儿

781
00:45:07,329 --> 00:45:09,331
‪像个一家之主...

782
00:45:15,045 --> 00:45:17,297
‪我家的女人是眼前那家伙

783
00:45:17,297 --> 00:45:19,383
‪我说:“死鬼 你最好快点做”

784
00:45:19,883 --> 00:45:21,552
‪然后他把手

785
00:45:22,970 --> 00:45:24,888
‪放在了我的小妹妹上

786
00:45:25,472 --> 00:45:28,559
‪开始摆弄那颗棒棒糖

787
00:45:28,559 --> 00:45:34,398
‪我说:“对!继续!”

788
00:45:34,398 --> 00:45:37,693
‪然后 在他拿开手时 我知道

789
00:45:37,693 --> 00:45:42,740
‪那个死鬼已经准备好舔棒棒糖了

790
00:45:42,740 --> 00:45:46,118
‪我不知道的是 他会把

791
00:45:46,118 --> 00:45:48,245
‪刚刚弄我棒棒糖的那只手

792
00:45:48,245 --> 00:45:49,788
‪放到了我鼻子下面

793
00:45:49,788 --> 00:45:52,082
‪我说:“死鬼 这是什么玩意儿?

794
00:45:54,501 --> 00:45:57,588
‪这是什么 死鬼?
‪你是要害我吗 死鬼?

795
00:45:58,088 --> 00:45:59,131
‪什么东西?”

796
00:45:59,131 --> 00:46:02,134
‪他说:“宝贝
‪这是你棒棒糖的味道!”

797
00:46:07,222 --> 00:46:12,186
‪噢 婊贝 我大为震惊!

798
00:46:12,186 --> 00:46:13,228
‪你们听到了吗?

799
00:46:13,228 --> 00:46:15,606
‪因为那种时候你能怎么说?

800
00:46:15,606 --> 00:46:18,442
‪你无话可说 你什么话都说不出来

801
00:46:18,442 --> 00:46:20,903
‪如果他说
‪上个星期 你的阴部很臭 你可以说:

802
00:46:20,903 --> 00:46:22,738
‪“死鬼 去你妈的 那是上个星期”

803
00:46:22,738 --> 00:46:24,782
‪但那就是当时的事!

804
00:46:26,074 --> 00:46:28,243
‪噢 老娘就此脱下了披风

805
00:46:28,243 --> 00:46:30,954
‪我不得不让那披风退出舞台了

806
00:46:30,954 --> 00:46:33,457
‪要知道 我必须得明白的是

807
00:46:33,999 --> 00:46:38,337
‪在我小的时候
‪从来没人跟我谈过卫生的问题

808
00:46:38,337 --> 00:46:41,632
‪我妈妈从来没有跟我说过:

809
00:46:41,632 --> 00:46:43,091
‪“你必须照顾好自己

810
00:46:43,091 --> 00:46:46,595
‪等你长大了
‪一天洗一次澡都他妈是不够的

811
00:46:46,595 --> 00:46:50,057
‪早上和晚上你都必须洗澡

812
00:46:50,057 --> 00:46:53,018
‪如果是八月 婊贝 那就早上、下午、

813
00:46:53,018 --> 00:46:56,355
‪早中午、晚上睡觉前还有深夜都得洗

814
00:46:56,355 --> 00:46:58,524
‪你必须多次清洁身体”

815
00:46:58,524 --> 00:47:00,943
‪从来没人跟我说过这些

816
00:47:03,195 --> 00:47:04,988
‪除了我奶奶

817
00:47:05,489 --> 00:47:07,074
‪我爸的母亲

818
00:47:07,574 --> 00:47:09,827
‪我奶奶是我的一切

819
00:47:10,327 --> 00:47:11,912
‪她大概这么高

820
00:47:11,912 --> 00:47:15,666
‪她只比小矮人高几厘米

821
00:47:15,666 --> 00:47:18,001
‪大概这么高 肤色非常深

822
00:47:18,502 --> 00:47:21,839
‪她因此受了很多苦

823
00:47:22,339 --> 00:47:25,175
‪但她会跟我说:
‪“莫妮克 你是上天赐我的宝贝”

824
00:47:25,759 --> 00:47:28,053
‪你们能想象别人跟你这么说吗?

825
00:47:28,554 --> 00:47:30,347
‪“你是上天赐我的宝贝”

826
00:47:30,848 --> 00:47:33,976
‪所以奶奶跟我说什么我都相信

827
00:47:34,476 --> 00:47:37,729
‪因为我知道她跟我说的永远都是对的

828
00:47:38,230 --> 00:47:41,149
‪她苦口婆心教我的一切 宝贝

829
00:47:41,149 --> 00:47:42,901
‪我都深信不疑

830
00:47:42,901 --> 00:47:46,238
‪在我13岁的时候...
‪我永远不会忘记那次

831
00:47:46,238 --> 00:47:50,033
‪我13岁的时候
‪我奶奶把我叫到她的房间

832
00:47:50,033 --> 00:47:51,326
‪她说:“妮妮...”

833
00:47:52,286 --> 00:47:53,620
‪我说:“奶奶”

834
00:47:54,121 --> 00:47:55,581
‪她说:“坐下”

835
00:47:56,081 --> 00:47:57,624
‪我说:“好的 奶奶”

836
00:47:57,624 --> 00:47:58,876
‪她说:“听好了

837
00:47:59,376 --> 00:48:02,754
‪永远不要把别人的老二放进你嘴巴里

838
00:48:03,881 --> 00:48:06,633
‪因为那样它会爆的” 我说:“要命!

839
00:48:10,929 --> 00:48:12,973
‪噢!我永远不会
‪把别人的老二放嘴巴里的

840
00:48:12,973 --> 00:48:15,893
‪我可不希望别人的老二爆掉!”
‪她说:“很好

841
00:48:15,893 --> 00:48:18,186
‪永远别把老二放进嘴巴里”

842
00:48:18,186 --> 00:48:20,814
‪那是我们最后一次聊到

843
00:48:20,814 --> 00:48:23,066
‪吹箫这件事 “别做就对了”

844
00:48:23,650 --> 00:48:26,528
‪所以我从13岁到22岁

845
00:48:26,528 --> 00:48:28,196
‪我从来没帮人吹过萧

846
00:48:28,196 --> 00:48:31,617
‪而我22岁会帮他吹箫的唯一原因

847
00:48:31,617 --> 00:48:33,243
‪是因为他人很好

848
00:48:33,243 --> 00:48:34,661
‪他人很好

849
00:48:37,080 --> 00:48:40,751
‪那天晚上 他的内心满溢着善良

850
00:48:40,751 --> 00:48:43,170
‪我们约会了一整天
‪那天是周日 朋友们

851
00:48:43,170 --> 00:48:44,254
‪非常美好

852
00:48:44,254 --> 00:48:47,925
‪我们去了小公园
‪我们在港口散步 做了一系列的事情

853
00:48:47,925 --> 00:48:51,929
‪所以当他邀请我去他家时
‪我说:“我当然会去咯”

854
00:48:51,929 --> 00:48:54,473
‪我们回到他家 喝了杯红酒什么的

855
00:48:54,473 --> 00:48:57,059
‪我们促膝长谈 温馨愉快

856
00:48:57,559 --> 00:48:59,937
‪然后他看着我说:“莫妮克?”

857
00:49:00,437 --> 00:49:01,855
‪我说:“嗯?”

858
00:49:02,940 --> 00:49:05,150
‪他说:“你介意帮我吹箫吗?”

859
00:49:14,701 --> 00:49:17,037
‪我说:“没问题 我帮你吹箫”

860
00:49:17,871 --> 00:49:22,209
‪这个转折难道不美吗 婊贝?
‪你们看到我们刚刚是什么情况了吗?

861
00:49:25,379 --> 00:49:28,507
‪然后我跟他说:“我先跟你说件事

862
00:49:29,091 --> 00:49:32,177
‪我以前从来没吹过箫”

863
00:49:32,678 --> 00:49:35,138
‪他说:“莫妮克 你不用担心

864
00:49:36,014 --> 00:49:38,266
‪我会教你怎么帮我吹箫的”

865
00:49:39,351 --> 00:49:41,645
‪我心想:“这人怎么这么贴心啊?

866
00:49:43,730 --> 00:49:47,609
‪他要教我怎么帮他吹箫
‪不是随便哪根箫哦”

867
00:49:47,609 --> 00:49:50,278
‪那家伙说:“我会教你怎么帮我吹箫”

868
00:49:50,278 --> 00:49:53,198
‪“天呐 多么美好啊”

869
00:49:54,241 --> 00:49:55,617
‪于是他说:“听着

870
00:49:57,536 --> 00:49:59,621
‪当我把老二放进你的嘴巴里

871
00:50:00,914 --> 00:50:03,667
‪你就像啾啾蒸汽火车那样吸它

872
00:50:04,418 --> 00:50:07,629
‪你知道火车出站时候的样子吧?

873
00:50:08,171 --> 00:50:09,881
‪它会慢慢启动

874
00:50:10,507 --> 00:50:12,134
‪所以你得慢慢吸”

875
00:50:20,017 --> 00:50:22,894
‪他说:“现在火车开始加速了
‪你得加快速度

876
00:50:28,608 --> 00:50:29,693
‪现在全速前进!”

877
00:50:31,486 --> 00:50:33,572
‪那家伙说:“啾啾!”

878
00:50:33,572 --> 00:50:37,993
‪而我耳边回响起奶奶说的:
‪“那老二会在你嘴巴里爆掉!”

879
00:50:37,993 --> 00:50:41,413
‪噢 我狠狠地咬了那家伙的老二!

880
00:50:45,792 --> 00:50:48,128
‪那家伙用力地打在了我的头上

881
00:50:48,128 --> 00:50:50,922
‪我他妈倒在了沙发上 婊贝!

882
00:50:50,922 --> 00:50:54,009
‪我知道自己有整整17秒失去了意识

883
00:50:55,552 --> 00:50:57,054
‪等我醒过来时

884
00:50:57,846 --> 00:51:01,266
‪等我醒过来时 我看着那家伙说:
‪“等着坐牢吧 小子

885
00:51:01,266 --> 00:51:05,645
‪你丫坐牢坐定了
‪因为你刚刚袭击我 混蛋!

886
00:51:05,645 --> 00:51:09,232
‪你想把我们 把我们整条街都炸掉!

887
00:51:09,232 --> 00:51:11,318
‪我是不会让你得逞的 混蛋!

888
00:51:11,318 --> 00:51:13,737
‪我要拯救这个街区 混蛋!

889
00:51:15,155 --> 00:51:16,990
‪我要报警!

890
00:51:16,990 --> 00:51:19,743
‪你丫等着坐牢吧!

891
00:51:19,743 --> 00:51:22,746
‪你看看老娘的脑袋 混蛋!坐牢吧!”

892
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:29,169
‪等警察来了!我们都一丝不挂的

893
00:51:30,378 --> 00:51:32,964
‪我们一丝不挂地站在他家

894
00:51:32,964 --> 00:51:34,382
‪我22岁

895
00:51:34,382 --> 00:51:36,384
‪22岁的时候
‪你们会以为我的咪咪很挺拔

896
00:51:36,384 --> 00:51:38,970
‪但我的咪咪跟人家54岁的那种一样

897
00:51:42,557 --> 00:51:45,977
‪我的咪咪从来没挺拔过
‪它们是像大猩猩的咪咪那样

898
00:51:45,977 --> 00:51:47,479
‪垂到地上!

899
00:51:47,979 --> 00:51:49,773
‪我一丝不挂地站在那里

900
00:51:49,773 --> 00:51:52,192
‪当时来了两个警察

901
00:51:52,192 --> 00:51:55,112
‪一个白人 一个黑人

902
00:51:55,612 --> 00:51:58,740
‪他们进来了 那个白人先开口说话了

903
00:51:58,740 --> 00:52:01,827
‪我心想:“小子
‪这人是管事的 你等着坐牢吧!

904
00:52:01,827 --> 00:52:03,161
‪等着坐牢吧!”

905
00:52:03,161 --> 00:52:05,664
‪那个白人警官说:
‪“女士 出什么事了?”

906
00:52:06,164 --> 00:52:10,794
‪我说:“长官 他打我的头!

907
00:52:11,545 --> 00:52:13,588
‪而且我...我好晕

908
00:52:14,381 --> 00:52:16,299
‪我要你们把他抓起来!

909
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,510
‪坐牢 混蛋 坐牢!”

910
00:52:18,510 --> 00:52:21,096
‪白人警官说:“先生

911
00:52:21,596 --> 00:52:23,890
‪转过身去 把手放到身后”

912
00:52:23,890 --> 00:52:25,892
‪我说:“没错 混蛋!坐牢吧 混蛋!”

913
00:52:25,892 --> 00:52:29,104
‪直到那个黑人警官开口了

914
00:52:29,104 --> 00:52:31,940
‪那个黑人警官
‪跟白人警官说:“等一下

915
00:52:31,940 --> 00:52:35,652
‪别铐他”
‪我心想:“噢 这家伙才是管事的”

916
00:52:37,779 --> 00:52:40,031
‪那个黑人警官没有问我发生了什么事

917
00:52:40,031 --> 00:52:42,659
‪他跑去问那个臭男人发生了什么事!

918
00:52:42,659 --> 00:52:46,371
‪他说:“先生 跟我说说事情经过”

919
00:52:46,371 --> 00:52:47,914
‪他说:“谢谢你 兄弟”

920
00:52:47,914 --> 00:52:51,835
‪我心想:“噢 他们在这儿打暗号呢”

921
00:52:52,544 --> 00:52:56,047
‪他说:“先生 她刚刚在帮我吹箫”

922
00:52:56,047 --> 00:52:57,841
‪我说:“哦”

923
00:53:01,678 --> 00:53:04,472
‪听起来很尴尬 对吧?

924
00:53:04,472 --> 00:53:08,268
‪“噢 混蛋 太折磨人了!
‪你没必要这么说吧!”

925
00:53:08,268 --> 00:53:10,353
‪因为在那之后 所有人都看着我

926
00:53:10,353 --> 00:53:13,190
‪就好像老娘是
‪整条街最后一个妓女似的!

927
00:53:15,025 --> 00:53:18,570
‪然后那老兄说:
‪“抱歉 先生 你刚刚说什么来着?”

928
00:53:18,570 --> 00:53:20,655
‪“我说她刚刚在帮我吹箫

929
00:53:22,824 --> 00:53:25,452
‪我在教她怎么帮我吹箫

930
00:53:25,452 --> 00:53:27,871
‪就像火车出站那样

931
00:53:27,871 --> 00:53:30,373
‪于是我告诉她
‪等我把老二放进你嘴巴里

932
00:53:30,373 --> 00:53:33,084
‪你就像火车刚开始启动那样吸它”

933
00:53:35,128 --> 00:53:39,758
‪然后我就看到
‪那个黑人警官和那混蛋一起啾啾啾

934
00:53:40,383 --> 00:53:44,554
‪我心想:“噢 这家伙
‪也教过人家怎么帮他吹箫

935
00:53:44,554 --> 00:53:45,513
‪该死!”

936
00:53:47,349 --> 00:53:49,976
‪等他解释完

937
00:53:49,976 --> 00:53:52,270
‪我看着那两个警官说:

938
00:53:52,270 --> 00:53:54,773
‪“听着 这混蛋是个恐怖分子

939
00:53:54,773 --> 00:53:57,776
‪他是个恐怖分子 他藏有炸弹

940
00:53:57,776 --> 00:54:00,779
‪你们必须得把他关起来!
‪立刻马上 形势非常严峻!”

941
00:54:00,779 --> 00:54:04,032
‪他们说:“女士
‪炸弹在哪里?爆炸物在哪里?”

942
00:54:04,032 --> 00:54:05,700
‪我说:“在他的老二里!

943
00:54:05,700 --> 00:54:07,786
‪他的老二里装满了炸弹!

944
00:54:07,786 --> 00:54:09,162
‪装满了炸弹!

945
00:54:09,162 --> 00:54:12,165
‪他要炸掉整条街!
‪我刚刚救了所有人!

946
00:54:12,165 --> 00:54:13,917
‪我是个大英雄!

947
00:54:13,917 --> 00:54:14,960
‪快把他抓走!”

948
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:19,464
‪那个黑人警官拿起对讲机

949
00:54:19,464 --> 00:54:21,341
‪他说:“我们这儿有个情障者”

950
00:54:23,176 --> 00:54:27,806
‪我他妈不知道情障者是什么鬼
‪于是我开始脑补

951
00:54:27,806 --> 00:54:30,058
‪这里有个情动障碍不勃者

952
00:54:30,058 --> 00:54:31,643
‪“不是这样的 长官

953
00:54:31,643 --> 00:54:33,353
‪他的老二里面有炸弹

954
00:54:33,353 --> 00:54:34,854
‪他要把我们都炸死!”

955
00:54:34,854 --> 00:54:37,524
‪他说:“情障者 快来!”

956
00:54:37,524 --> 00:54:40,694
‪等负责情障者的人到了以后

957
00:54:40,694 --> 00:54:44,906
‪那是“情绪...障碍患者”的简称

958
00:54:44,906 --> 00:54:46,700
‪我说:“这人是谁?”

959
00:54:48,118 --> 00:54:51,621
‪宝贝 在他们给我穿上约束服

960
00:54:52,956 --> 00:54:55,875
‪把我带到精神病病区时

961
00:54:55,875 --> 00:54:57,836
‪我身上连条内裤都没有

962
00:54:57,836 --> 00:55:00,088
‪我身上只有
‪那件约束服和我的小翘臀!

963
00:55:04,050 --> 00:55:09,097
‪他们把我关了72个小时 给我做评估

964
00:55:09,097 --> 00:55:12,976
‪我隔壁的那个姐们儿说:
‪“你是为什么进来的?”

965
00:55:12,976 --> 00:55:15,395
‪我说:“婊贝 我救了整个街区!

966
00:55:17,480 --> 00:55:20,859
‪那混蛋的老二已经准备要爆炸了
‪然后我咬了他!”

967
00:55:20,859 --> 00:55:24,821
‪她说:“我也是因为这个进来的
‪我奶奶跟我说过同样的话”

968
00:55:28,491 --> 00:55:30,243
‪我从那里出来后

969
00:55:30,744 --> 00:55:32,120
‪我直接

970
00:55:32,620 --> 00:55:34,664
‪冲去了我奶奶家里

971
00:55:36,541 --> 00:55:37,876
‪我说:“奶奶

972
00:55:38,543 --> 00:55:39,711
‪你跟我说

973
00:55:40,879 --> 00:55:44,132
‪要是我把老二放进嘴里

974
00:55:44,632 --> 00:55:47,218
‪它就会爆炸”

975
00:55:47,844 --> 00:55:49,637
‪然后我奶奶就笑了

976
00:55:52,640 --> 00:55:55,643
‪她说:“噢 妮妮
‪总有一天你会明白的”

977
00:55:56,144 --> 00:56:00,023
‪我蒂娜叔叔经过
‪然后说:“这就是我当拉拉的原因”

978
00:56:08,490 --> 00:56:10,700
‪对 没错 看吧
‪我就是在这些人身边长大的

979
00:56:11,201 --> 00:56:13,036
‪我就是在这些人身边长大的 宝贝

980
00:56:13,036 --> 00:56:16,748
‪我就是在他们身边长大的
‪当我告诉你们我奶奶

981
00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:19,250
‪非常了不起...

982
00:56:20,043 --> 00:56:21,294
‪对吧?

983
00:56:21,294 --> 00:56:24,506
‪这女人对我 就像太阳
‪贴心地等我醒了才升起来一样

984
00:56:25,006 --> 00:56:27,467
‪而且它一直等我睡下 才徐徐落下

985
00:56:27,967 --> 00:56:30,387
‪如果我凌晨三点醒来说:

986
00:56:30,387 --> 00:56:32,680
‪“奶奶 我饿了”

987
00:56:33,181 --> 00:56:37,060
‪我奶奶就会起来
‪帮我炸三个酥脆的鸡翅膀

988
00:56:38,770 --> 00:56:42,565
‪再配上土豆泥 朋友们
‪不是盒装的那种 是她亲自煮的

989
00:56:42,565 --> 00:56:45,527
‪一些豆角还有两片白面包

990
00:56:45,527 --> 00:56:48,113
‪这就是老娘现在会这么胖的原因
‪她把我喂得太好了

991
00:56:48,613 --> 00:56:51,574
‪然后她会带我上楼 把我安置在床上

992
00:56:53,284 --> 00:56:55,703
‪她会坐在那儿陪我入睡

993
00:56:56,454 --> 00:57:01,209
‪等我醒来时 她也一定会坐在我身边

994
00:57:01,793 --> 00:57:04,087
‪在她眼里 我就是一切

995
00:57:04,963 --> 00:57:07,298
‪我奶奶有个女儿

996
00:57:08,341 --> 00:57:11,970
‪但我们都叫她蒂娜叔叔

997
00:57:14,097 --> 00:57:16,224
‪你们中有些人
‪就像是我特殊教育班的同学啊

998
00:57:16,224 --> 00:57:18,726
‪你们都是一副“她啥意思?”的样子

999
00:57:21,521 --> 00:57:23,690
‪我的蒂娜叔叔 如果她现在来到这里

1000
00:57:23,690 --> 00:57:25,942
‪你们会觉得自己看到的是一个真男人

1001
00:57:26,609 --> 00:57:27,944
‪她留着大胡子

1002
00:57:28,445 --> 00:57:30,822
‪她穿了束胸衣

1003
00:57:30,822 --> 00:57:34,826
‪她在裤子里放了些什么东西
‪让她看起来就像有个老二一样

1004
00:57:34,826 --> 00:57:37,245
‪而且她穿的都是男装男鞋

1005
00:57:37,245 --> 00:57:40,748
‪我蒂娜叔叔整个人就像个男人

1006
00:57:41,249 --> 00:57:45,003
‪所以你们这些LGBTQ人士

1007
00:57:45,003 --> 00:57:46,504
‪我要你们听好了

1008
00:57:46,504 --> 00:57:51,843
‪我尊重这里的每一个人
‪希望你们都有足够的自由活出真我

1009
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:54,137
‪我尊重那些会说:

1010
00:57:54,137 --> 00:57:56,639
‪“我才不在意你怎么想 怎么说

1011
00:57:56,639 --> 00:57:58,766
‪我会走我自己的路” 的人

1012
00:57:58,766 --> 00:58:02,145
‪当你们遇到那些瞎逼逼的人

1013
00:58:02,145 --> 00:58:03,730
‪那些好奇得要死的人

1014
00:58:03,730 --> 00:58:07,275
‪请理解 他们就是
‪想了解一下真实的情况

1015
00:58:07,275 --> 00:58:10,153
‪他们才弯得最厉害
‪所以不要生气或者觉得被冒犯

1016
00:58:10,153 --> 00:58:13,490
‪只要记得 他们是想被插就行了!

1017
00:58:17,410 --> 00:58:20,121
‪我奶奶接受不了

1018
00:58:20,914 --> 00:58:24,042
‪她有个...同性恋女儿

1019
00:58:25,210 --> 00:58:27,295
‪她只能私下里爱她

1020
00:58:27,962 --> 00:58:30,256
‪她不能大大方方地爱她

1021
00:58:31,216 --> 00:58:33,885
‪因为教会禁锢了她的思想

1022
00:58:34,969 --> 00:58:37,847
‪我们社区那个天杀的教会

1023
00:58:37,847 --> 00:58:41,267
‪祸害我们 拆散家人

1024
00:58:41,267 --> 00:58:43,686
‪无所不用其极

1025
00:58:43,686 --> 00:58:46,064
‪而且他们还会以耶稣的名义那样做

1026
00:58:46,064 --> 00:58:49,150
‪我亲眼见证了这种事
‪发生在我亲爱的奶奶身上

1027
00:58:49,150 --> 00:58:53,071
‪她就是接受不了自己有个

1028
00:58:53,071 --> 00:58:55,114
‪同性恋女儿 宝贝

1029
00:58:55,114 --> 00:58:57,784
‪她们一起出去时 我会看着她们

1030
00:58:58,284 --> 00:59:01,996
‪我姑姑连呼吸都会让我奶奶闹心

1031
00:59:01,996 --> 00:59:04,916
‪“你干嘛那样喘气?”
‪我说:“什么玩意儿?

1032
00:59:04,916 --> 00:59:06,417
‪她是该憋着不喘气吗?

1033
00:59:07,293 --> 00:59:09,087
‪那样就能治好她的性向啦?”

1034
00:59:15,051 --> 00:59:16,636
‪而我的蒂娜叔叔...

1035
00:59:18,221 --> 00:59:21,558
‪对我...这么一个小姑娘 非常坦诚

1036
00:59:21,558 --> 00:59:24,769
‪因为他们知道我不会评头论足

1037
00:59:24,769 --> 00:59:26,854
‪我不知道该怎么去评论别人

1038
00:59:27,605 --> 00:59:30,441
‪我只知道你怎么对我 我就怎么对你

1039
00:59:30,441 --> 00:59:33,152
‪而我蒂娜叔叔对我非常好

1040
00:59:33,152 --> 00:59:35,238
‪对 作为一个小姑娘

1041
00:59:35,238 --> 00:59:38,324
‪有一年圣诞节 我大约七岁

1042
00:59:39,117 --> 00:59:42,453
‪大人都在餐厅 我在厨房里

1043
00:59:42,453 --> 00:59:45,081
‪孩子们在客厅里玩玩具

1044
00:59:45,081 --> 00:59:46,833
‪老娘为什么会在厨房里?

1045
00:59:46,833 --> 00:59:49,919
‪好吧 婊贝 因为我在那儿 对吧?

1046
00:59:49,919 --> 00:59:51,796
‪派、饼干、蛋糕 还有各种东西 婊贝

1047
00:59:51,796 --> 00:59:53,381
‪我在厨房里

1048
00:59:53,923 --> 00:59:54,799
‪好吧?

1049
00:59:55,425 --> 00:59:59,095
‪我的蒂娜叔叔来到厨房
‪她说:“妮妮”

1050
00:59:59,762 --> 01:00:00,930
‪我说:“姑姑?”

1051
01:00:01,848 --> 01:00:03,391
‪她说:“我是拉拉”

1052
01:00:04,809 --> 01:00:06,144
‪我说:“我也是”

1053
01:00:09,272 --> 01:00:13,901
‪因为她说得太动听了 好吧?
‪我说:“婊贝 我也是 我也是那个”

1054
01:00:13,901 --> 01:00:16,654
‪然后她说:“不

1055
01:00:16,654 --> 01:00:18,573
‪我是个攻”

1056
01:00:21,826 --> 01:00:25,330
‪“我也是!我也是个攻”

1057
01:00:25,830 --> 01:00:29,250
‪然后她说:“妮妮 我会操女人”

1058
01:00:30,293 --> 01:00:31,544
‪我说:“好吧”

1059
01:00:37,133 --> 01:00:39,010
‪因为这话我接不了

1060
01:00:39,010 --> 01:00:41,220
‪这话我接不上了

1061
01:00:53,816 --> 01:00:57,278
‪我眼看着这两个女人苦苦挣扎

1062
01:00:59,739 --> 01:01:03,910
‪我看着她们苦苦挣扎
‪直到我奶奶离开了人世

1063
01:01:05,119 --> 01:01:08,581
‪而她们就是...没法好好相处

1064
01:01:09,248 --> 01:01:11,626
‪因为她觉得自己很失败

1065
01:01:12,877 --> 01:01:15,338
‪因为她把一个同性恋宝宝
‪带到了这个世界上

1066
01:01:15,963 --> 01:01:21,386
‪那个教会忽悠她相信了
‪她女儿是种罪孽 好吧?

1067
01:01:22,178 --> 01:01:24,097
‪而她就是那样对她的

1068
01:01:25,056 --> 01:01:27,392
‪想象一下我作为一个孩子 有多困惑

1069
01:01:27,392 --> 01:01:30,812
‪因为这里
‪这个女人 对我来说 该死的

1070
01:01:30,812 --> 01:01:32,772
‪我就是一切

1071
01:01:33,606 --> 01:01:35,692
‪但你针对的那个人

1072
01:01:37,026 --> 01:01:39,362
‪你不能拥抱她

1073
01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:41,364
‪因为她本来的样子

1074
01:01:41,864 --> 01:01:44,117
‪我看着她们苦苦挣扎

1075
01:01:44,701 --> 01:01:46,619
‪我看着她们苦苦挣扎

1076
01:01:46,619 --> 01:01:51,624
‪我奶奶走了以后
‪蒂娜叔叔就成了一个无家可归的酒鬼

1077
01:01:52,500 --> 01:01:55,795
‪因为她不明白

1078
01:01:55,795 --> 01:01:57,922
‪她妈妈为什么

1079
01:01:57,922 --> 01:02:02,885
‪不能给她她需要的爱 好吧?

1080
01:02:04,262 --> 01:02:05,430
‪而我觉得...

1081
01:02:08,558 --> 01:02:10,601
‪我奶奶走的时候

1082
01:02:11,185 --> 01:02:13,104
‪我觉得自己像个胆小鬼

1083
01:02:15,982 --> 01:02:18,151
‪因为我没能告诉我奶奶

1084
01:02:19,736 --> 01:02:22,155
‪她孙女真实的样子

1085
01:02:23,865 --> 01:02:26,617
‪因为我不希望她只能在私底下爱我

1086
01:02:28,369 --> 01:02:30,997
‪我喜欢她对我的爱

1087
01:02:31,497 --> 01:02:34,500
‪当我们去到商店里
‪如果杂志封面上有我

1088
01:02:34,500 --> 01:02:38,463
‪她一定会让全商店的人都知道

1089
01:02:38,463 --> 01:02:40,631
‪我是她孙女

1090
01:02:41,132 --> 01:02:43,384
‪我是上天赐给她的宝贝

1091
01:02:46,429 --> 01:02:48,639
‪所以我不能告诉我奶奶

1092
01:02:49,348 --> 01:02:51,058
‪我心里的秘密

1093
01:02:52,101 --> 01:02:53,978
‪还有我的幻想

1094
01:02:56,355 --> 01:02:58,566
‪因为我不希望她

1095
01:02:59,317 --> 01:03:03,362
‪只能在私底下爱我
‪我不希望她离开人世时

1096
01:03:03,362 --> 01:03:05,531
‪觉得自己很失败

1097
01:03:06,449 --> 01:03:08,201
‪因为如果我告诉她...

1098
01:03:10,119 --> 01:03:11,829
‪我心里的秘密...

1099
01:03:15,875 --> 01:03:17,835
‪她走的时候就会觉得

1100
01:03:18,669 --> 01:03:19,921
‪自己很失败

1101
01:03:21,255 --> 01:03:25,176
‪我知道你们现在看着我
‪都在想:“等等 婊贝

1102
01:03:28,221 --> 01:03:30,640
‪你他妈是个拉拉?”

1103
01:03:31,808 --> 01:03:34,769
‪不 我不是...不全是

1104
01:03:42,527 --> 01:03:46,948
‪我不能大声告诉她

1105
01:03:46,948 --> 01:03:49,367
‪你们知道保守一个秘密有多难吗?

1106
01:03:51,536 --> 01:03:53,329
‪秘密会导致癌症

1107
01:03:59,377 --> 01:04:02,922
‪你们中有些人也有秘密
‪大家都一副:“拜托别看我”的样子

1108
01:04:02,922 --> 01:04:05,132
‪“只要我张开嘴

1109
01:04:05,132 --> 01:04:07,218
‪这破事就快冲口而出了 秘密!”

1110
01:04:09,887 --> 01:04:11,931
‪但如果你生来就是那样

1111
01:04:13,099 --> 01:04:15,935
‪很显然 你对此也无能为力

1112
01:04:16,602 --> 01:04:17,687
‪无能为力

1113
01:04:18,479 --> 01:04:20,648
‪请大家明白 我努力过了

1114
01:04:21,148 --> 01:04:24,318
‪我努力试过要摆脱它
‪宝贝 你们都听好了

1115
01:04:24,318 --> 01:04:26,904
‪我努力想要摆脱它

1116
01:04:26,904 --> 01:04:29,407
‪因为我不希望被人当成一个有病的人

1117
01:04:29,407 --> 01:04:30,700
‪或者觉得我有什么问题

1118
01:04:30,700 --> 01:04:34,537
‪所以我尽我所能和尽量多的男人上床

1119
01:04:34,537 --> 01:04:38,291
‪我不是妓女 但是

1120
01:04:39,750 --> 01:04:41,836
‪我的生活是有点乱 朋友们

1121
01:04:41,836 --> 01:04:43,629
‪我是有点婊

1122
01:04:43,629 --> 01:04:47,884
‪妮基帕克说:“嘿 奥格莱维教授!”

1123
01:04:47,884 --> 01:04:51,095
‪世上的男人数不胜数哦 朋友们!

1124
01:04:56,058 --> 01:04:58,853
‪但我一直保守着这个秘密
‪我向自己保证

1125
01:04:58,853 --> 01:05:00,771
‪我永远不会告诉任何人

1126
01:05:02,398 --> 01:05:04,358
‪我会把它带进坟墓里

1127
01:05:06,569 --> 01:05:08,821
‪因为我见识过他们是如何对待

1128
01:05:09,655 --> 01:05:12,450
‪我们家里有那种疾病的人的

1129
01:05:12,950 --> 01:05:16,329
‪因为他们让我们相信那是种疾病

1130
01:05:16,829 --> 01:05:17,997
‪对吧?

1131
01:05:18,956 --> 01:05:22,585
‪有天晚上 那种欲望如此强烈

1132
01:05:23,586 --> 01:05:25,296
‪我在床上睡着了

1133
01:05:26,255 --> 01:05:28,841
‪那小东西不断地撩拨着我

1134
01:05:28,841 --> 01:05:31,135
‪好像在说:“阴部 阴部”

1135
01:05:36,891 --> 01:05:40,144
‪我躺在床上 万分恐惧 因为

1136
01:05:40,645 --> 01:05:42,480
‪这是我第三个老公

1137
01:05:43,230 --> 01:05:44,273
‪好吧?

1138
01:05:45,274 --> 01:05:47,109
‪这是第三个 宝贝

1139
01:05:47,860 --> 01:05:49,320
‪这一个...

1140
01:05:52,156 --> 01:05:54,158
‪在我身处低谷时依然爱我

1141
01:05:54,659 --> 01:05:56,869
‪就好像我身处巅峰一样

1142
01:05:57,370 --> 01:05:59,288
‪这一个 宝贝...

1143
01:06:02,249 --> 01:06:05,419
‪他给了我这地球上任何人都未曾

1144
01:06:05,419 --> 01:06:07,964
‪给过我的感觉

1145
01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:09,423
‪这一个就是这样

1146
01:06:09,423 --> 01:06:12,426
‪有些黑人女性会问:
‪“你为什么叫他爸爸?”

1147
01:06:12,426 --> 01:06:15,888
‪我来告诉你们为什么吧
‪我会解释清楚 因为他让我强大

1148
01:06:15,888 --> 01:06:18,808
‪我来告诉你们
‪我为什么叫那个黑人“爸爸”

1149
01:06:18,808 --> 01:06:21,435
‪那个黑人给了我

1150
01:06:21,435 --> 01:06:24,939
‪我父亲要么不知道怎么给予我
‪要么根本懒得给我的一切

1151
01:06:24,939 --> 01:06:27,108
‪所以我才会叫那个黑人“爸爸”

1152
01:06:27,108 --> 01:06:30,736
‪如果有个人
‪他让你的所有错误都变成了对的...

1153
01:06:31,737 --> 01:06:35,658
‪宝贝 那天晚上
‪我躺在床上 惊慌失措...

1154
01:06:36,993 --> 01:06:38,577
‪我惊慌失措

1155
01:06:39,328 --> 01:06:42,581
‪因为我在对自己说:
‪“这可不是他结婚的时候想要的”

1156
01:06:43,791 --> 01:06:47,336
‪他娶的人是你 婊贝
‪不是你外加另一个小婊贝

1157
01:06:56,012 --> 01:06:57,346
‪所以你要怎么办?

1158
01:06:57,930 --> 01:07:01,392
‪那种时候 当你躺在一个
‪比你自己还要了解你的人身边时

1159
01:07:01,392 --> 01:07:04,562
‪你要怎么办?

1160
01:07:04,562 --> 01:07:07,273
‪因为你小时候 他们对你的关注

1161
01:07:07,273 --> 01:07:10,359
‪远远超过了你对自己的关注

1162
01:07:10,359 --> 01:07:11,861
‪我躺在床上

1163
01:07:11,861 --> 01:07:14,113
‪那个秘密把我压得喘不过气来

1164
01:07:14,113 --> 01:07:17,992
‪它让我的身、心、灵魂都很煎熬

1165
01:07:17,992 --> 01:07:21,412
‪因为我觉得我不能和任何人诉说
‪这个我与生俱来的东西

1166
01:07:21,412 --> 01:07:24,206
‪我不得不把那家伙
‪从睡梦中叫醒 宝贝

1167
01:07:24,206 --> 01:07:26,876
‪我很害怕 因为我说:
‪“拜托 我跟你说了以后

1168
01:07:26,876 --> 01:07:28,377
‪请别离开我

1169
01:07:29,420 --> 01:07:31,338
‪因为那样我会活不下去的

1170
01:07:31,839 --> 01:07:34,133
‪但我必须告诉你
‪宝贝 因为你很了解我

1171
01:07:34,133 --> 01:07:35,926
‪不对劲的时候你会看得出来

1172
01:07:35,926 --> 01:07:38,846
‪而多年来 有件事一直都不对劲”

1173
01:07:39,889 --> 01:07:43,184
‪但因为我是个名人 是个明星

1174
01:07:43,684 --> 01:07:45,144
‪我可以把它掩饰得很好

1175
01:07:45,144 --> 01:07:47,480
‪我可以用我光鲜的一面来掩饰它

1176
01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:50,649
‪但那天晚上 面具掉了

1177
01:07:52,568 --> 01:07:54,403
‪我不得不叫醒他

1178
01:07:56,113 --> 01:07:58,699
‪我说:“爸爸 我得告诉你件事”

1179
01:07:59,825 --> 01:08:01,911
‪他说:“妈妈 怎么了?”

1180
01:08:02,870 --> 01:08:04,663
‪我说:“我有个秘密

1181
01:08:06,916 --> 01:08:11,504
‪答应我 我说完以后你不会离开我”

1182
01:08:13,047 --> 01:08:16,008
‪他说:“莫妮克 不管你跟我说什么事

1183
01:08:16,884 --> 01:08:19,136
‪我都不会离开你的”

1184
01:08:21,138 --> 01:08:22,473
‪我说:“行

1185
01:08:23,307 --> 01:08:24,767
‪那我说了”

1186
01:08:24,767 --> 01:08:28,104
‪我说:“爸爸...” 他说:“等一下 婊贝

1187
01:08:31,482 --> 01:08:33,734
‪你是不是杀人了 婊贝?”

1188
01:08:35,486 --> 01:08:38,781
‪我说:“没有 死鬼 我他妈没杀人”

1189
01:08:39,281 --> 01:08:40,991
‪他说:“那就行 你说吧”

1190
01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:46,372
‪我说:“爸爸...”

1191
01:08:47,289 --> 01:08:49,917
‪我心跳加速 因为这是我第一次

1192
01:08:49,917 --> 01:08:53,671
‪准备要跟别人说这件事

1193
01:08:57,883 --> 01:08:59,301
‪我说:“爸爸

1194
01:09:00,594 --> 01:09:04,348
‪我想和另一个女人发生性关系”

1195
01:09:06,100 --> 01:09:08,060
‪他看着我

1196
01:09:08,686 --> 01:09:12,481
‪那么美好 充满耐心 爱意满溢...

1197
01:09:14,108 --> 01:09:16,277
‪然后说:“婊贝 我也是!”

1198
01:09:18,612 --> 01:09:22,366
‪他说:“你要是找到了那女的
‪我们就一起上她!

1199
01:09:22,867 --> 01:09:26,579
‪这就是困扰了你这么多年的事情?”

1200
01:09:26,579 --> 01:09:29,331
‪他说:“小妹妹最棒了!”

1201
01:09:29,331 --> 01:09:34,003
‪我说:“死鬼 可不是嘛!”
‪他说:“婊贝 去找妹子吧!”

1202
01:09:40,259 --> 01:09:43,429
‪然后我跟自己说:
‪“我必须让它继续活在幻想里

1203
01:09:45,222 --> 01:09:47,892
‪我必须让它继续活在幻想里
‪因为我知道自己是什么样的

1204
01:09:48,434 --> 01:09:51,395
‪LGBTQ群体中会谈论我

1205
01:09:51,395 --> 01:09:54,440
‪他们会谈论我
‪然后说:‘那女人想要争取平等

1206
01:09:54,440 --> 01:09:56,817
‪但她却不愿意平等待人’”

1207
01:09:59,820 --> 01:10:02,156
‪因为你帮我舔完以后 婊贝 谢啦

1208
01:10:06,660 --> 01:10:08,746
‪“你要来点咖啡什么的吗?”

1209
01:10:10,873 --> 01:10:13,834
‪“不用了 女士”

1210
01:10:14,627 --> 01:10:17,338
‪“别把你的小妹...不要!”

1211
01:10:18,964 --> 01:10:22,551
‪“莫妮克 我让你爽了
‪婊贝 我谢谢你啊!

1212
01:10:23,135 --> 01:10:25,179
‪你很善良

1213
01:10:26,180 --> 01:10:28,182
‪你很聪明

1214
01:10:28,724 --> 01:10:31,769
‪你很重要!”

1215
01:10:33,479 --> 01:10:35,189
‪有人问我...

1216
01:10:36,649 --> 01:10:38,192
‪“你是怎么

1217
01:10:39,485 --> 01:10:40,819
‪坚持下去的?

1218
01:10:41,862 --> 01:10:44,240
‪婊贝 你是怎么

1219
01:10:44,740 --> 01:10:46,075
‪持续下去的?”

1220
01:10:46,659 --> 01:10:50,704
‪因为你生来就是个胖嘟嘟的黑人女孩

1221
01:10:51,205 --> 01:10:54,375
‪你只想大家认可你 接纳你

1222
01:10:54,375 --> 01:10:56,627
‪这是你的全部所求

1223
01:10:56,627 --> 01:11:00,381
‪你只希望别人能认可你

1224
01:11:00,381 --> 01:11:04,218
‪你愿意竭尽所能来换取那份认可

1225
01:11:04,218 --> 01:11:06,804
‪你拼命想要得到认可

1226
01:11:06,804 --> 01:11:09,139
‪我年长了一些后 我说:
‪“你知道吗?莫妮克

1227
01:11:09,139 --> 01:11:13,686
‪你要做的就是接受一切 顺其自然”

1228
01:11:13,686 --> 01:11:15,688
‪所以我不得不接受一个现实

1229
01:11:16,313 --> 01:11:19,984
‪我父亲是个该死的酒鬼

1230
01:11:19,984 --> 01:11:22,194
‪而且确实根本不在意他的家人

1231
01:11:22,194 --> 01:11:24,280
‪我不得不接受一个现实

1232
01:11:24,280 --> 01:11:27,283
‪我妈妈是个天杀的赌徒

1233
01:11:27,283 --> 01:11:29,827
‪她可以把所有东西都拿去赌

1234
01:11:29,827 --> 01:11:31,787
‪我不得不接受一个现实

1235
01:11:31,787 --> 01:11:34,581
‪我大哥是个该死的猥亵犯

1236
01:11:34,581 --> 01:11:37,501
‪我不得不接受一个现实
‪我另一个兄弟

1237
01:11:37,501 --> 01:11:41,213
‪以我的名义冒签文件 毁坏我的名声

1238
01:11:41,213 --> 01:11:44,049
‪我不做评判 事实就是如此

1239
01:11:44,049 --> 01:11:48,679
‪这些事让我有了能力
‪去接受别人对我的无端指责

1240
01:11:48,679 --> 01:11:52,057
‪当有人跟我说:
‪“你不是大卫查普尔

1241
01:11:52,057 --> 01:11:54,268
‪你不是艾米舒默

1242
01:11:54,268 --> 01:11:56,437
‪你不是克里斯洛克”时

1243
01:11:56,437 --> 01:11:58,605
‪这些混蛋说得对

1244
01:11:58,605 --> 01:12:01,775
‪因为我叫莫妮克

1245
01:12:13,704 --> 01:12:16,957
{\an8}‪(我爱你 莫妮克)

1246
01:12:38,020 --> 01:12:48,572
‪莫妮克!

1247
01:15:43,372 --> 01:15:48,377
- ‪字幕翻译:
- Zeo Niu



