1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:43,413 --> 00:00:46,407 [MUSIC PLAYING] 4 00:02:18,300 --> 00:02:21,100 Peter, what have you done? 5 00:02:31,053 --> 00:02:32,720 Do you want to hear a Christmas story? 6 00:02:48,948 --> 00:02:51,912 [LAUGHTER] 7 00:03:04,862 --> 00:03:06,150 Oh, Chloe. 8 00:03:06,150 --> 00:03:07,980 What do you think you're doing? 9 00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:10,030 I saw a Santa, Toby. 10 00:03:10,030 --> 00:03:10,830 Really? 11 00:03:10,830 --> 00:03:12,000 Yeah, he was in the drive. 12 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,298 I saw him with his friends. 13 00:03:13,298 --> 00:03:14,340 You were just dreaming. 14 00:03:14,340 --> 00:03:15,240 Go back to sleep. 15 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,040 Please, Toby, come and look. 16 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:18,090 Go away. 17 00:03:18,090 --> 00:03:19,425 Please, Toby, come look. 18 00:03:21,930 --> 00:03:23,640 So annoying. 19 00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:26,130 Yeah, the kids are asleep. 20 00:03:26,130 --> 00:03:27,930 And we're looking forward to seeing you, 21 00:03:27,930 --> 00:03:30,690 but Toby's probably going to be too busy with his new killer 22 00:03:30,690 --> 00:03:33,570 elf game. 23 00:03:33,570 --> 00:03:35,670 Yeah, Chloe's going to love her new doll. 24 00:03:38,690 --> 00:03:41,420 You know Sean, he's anything. 25 00:03:41,420 --> 00:03:45,250 Do you need us to bring anything with us? 26 00:03:45,250 --> 00:03:47,140 OK, well, if you're sure. 27 00:03:47,140 --> 00:03:48,140 See you tomorrow, mom. 28 00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:48,940 Love you. 29 00:03:48,940 --> 00:03:49,740 Bye. 30 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,630 See, no one's there. 31 00:03:55,630 --> 00:03:56,800 But I saw them. 32 00:03:59,866 --> 00:04:01,963 You were just dreaming. 33 00:04:01,963 --> 00:04:04,921 (DOG BARKING) 34 00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:13,745 Rufus, shut up or I'll chop your balls off. 35 00:04:19,550 --> 00:04:21,079 I swear I saw him. 36 00:04:21,079 --> 00:04:23,120 He was with an elf and a snowman. 37 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:26,300 I'm sure he was, but you're not supposed to see Santa, 38 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,985 so don't let him know, or he'll take all your presents. 39 00:04:38,690 --> 00:04:41,355 Polly, close the window. 40 00:04:41,355 --> 00:04:42,155 It's cold. 41 00:05:01,258 --> 00:05:03,830 [LAUGHTER] 42 00:05:03,830 --> 00:05:04,630 Dad. 43 00:05:17,420 --> 00:05:18,935 Dad. 44 00:05:18,935 --> 00:05:20,185 It's a terrible Santa costume. 45 00:05:57,579 --> 00:06:01,610 I'm your snowman, short and fat. 46 00:06:01,610 --> 00:06:05,200 Here's my scarf and here's my hat. 47 00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:07,960 When I see the snowfall, hear me shout. 48 00:06:12,980 --> 00:06:15,545 All the little children please come out. 49 00:06:24,025 --> 00:06:24,825 Santa. 50 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:32,720 You don't look like I thought you would, Santa. 51 00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:34,145 Did you have an accident? 52 00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:39,950 Yes, little girl. 53 00:06:39,950 --> 00:06:44,910 Santa had a very bad accident this year. 54 00:06:44,910 --> 00:06:46,970 Did your sleigh crash? 55 00:06:46,970 --> 00:06:48,365 Are your reindeer OK? 56 00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:53,815 What's your name? 57 00:06:53,815 --> 00:06:54,615 Chloe. 58 00:07:01,030 --> 00:07:04,330 Would you like a present, Chloe? 59 00:07:04,330 --> 00:07:05,695 Yes please, Santa. 60 00:07:13,300 --> 00:07:15,940 This belonged to another little girl's house 61 00:07:15,940 --> 00:07:18,420 that I visited. 62 00:07:18,420 --> 00:07:21,720 Would you want bunny like a friend? 63 00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:22,950 Yes, please, Santa. 64 00:07:28,530 --> 00:07:31,620 Would you like a special present, Chloe? 65 00:07:31,620 --> 00:07:34,530 Yes, please, Santa. 66 00:07:34,530 --> 00:07:41,750 Would you and your brother want to come on that ride 67 00:07:41,750 --> 00:07:44,030 to the North Pole? 68 00:07:44,030 --> 00:07:44,930 Really? 69 00:07:44,930 --> 00:07:46,160 Yes. 70 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:50,870 You can come and see all the fun we have in our workshops 71 00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:55,656 with the other little girls and boys. 72 00:07:55,656 --> 00:07:58,632 [LAUGHTER] 73 00:08:10,005 --> 00:08:11,880 The presence must be around here somewhere. 74 00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:13,552 Harriet, your dad's going to catch us. 75 00:08:13,552 --> 00:08:15,510 Did you know the family who used to live here 76 00:08:15,510 --> 00:08:17,760 got killed on Christmas Eve? 77 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:19,410 Really? 78 00:08:19,410 --> 00:08:20,910 Yeah, they never found the girl. 79 00:08:20,910 --> 00:08:21,710 Hi. 80 00:08:23,870 --> 00:08:26,678 I'm back home. 81 00:08:26,678 --> 00:08:28,850 I bought a bigger tree than we used to. 82 00:08:28,850 --> 00:08:31,694 [SCREAMS] 83 00:08:31,694 --> 00:08:34,070 [LAUGHTER] 84 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,710 Mr Red, I have two new playmates. 85 00:08:36,710 --> 00:08:40,417 It's time for some fun. 86 00:08:40,417 --> 00:08:43,381 [LAUGHTER] 87 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:52,240 Hello. 88 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,780 We've had a call about a domestic disturbance. 89 00:08:57,485 --> 00:08:58,285 Is anyone home? 90 00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:01,590 Nice house. 91 00:09:15,725 --> 00:09:16,525 Fuck. 92 00:09:20,980 --> 00:09:22,480 Great first Christmas on the beat. 93 00:09:26,630 --> 00:09:29,020 Yeah, well, it's going to be a long one. 94 00:09:29,020 --> 00:09:30,712 While you doing area search down here, 95 00:09:30,712 --> 00:09:31,795 I'll do the same upstairs. 96 00:09:31,795 --> 00:09:36,280 (SINGING) The stars in the bright sky 97 00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:39,440 look down where he lay. 98 00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:40,340 Sounds like a girl. 99 00:09:40,340 --> 00:09:47,446 (SINGING) The little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay. 100 00:09:51,430 --> 00:09:59,730 The stars in the bright sky looked down where he lay. 101 00:09:59,730 --> 00:10:08,670 The little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay. 102 00:10:08,670 --> 00:10:20,260 The stars in the bright sky look down where lay, the little Lord 103 00:10:20,260 --> 00:10:26,160 Jesus asleep on the hay. 104 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:32,370 Hey, you OK? 105 00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:34,460 Of course, I'm OK, silly. 106 00:10:34,460 --> 00:10:37,830 It's Christmas. 107 00:10:37,830 --> 00:10:40,840 How do you come to join our party? 108 00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:42,070 Come on. 109 00:10:42,070 --> 00:10:43,300 Come out here with me. 110 00:10:43,300 --> 00:10:44,230 Why? 111 00:10:44,230 --> 00:10:46,660 Where are we going? 112 00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:48,790 Somewhere safe. 113 00:10:48,790 --> 00:10:52,180 I'm always safe with Mr. Red. 114 00:10:52,180 --> 00:10:52,990 Mr. Red. 115 00:10:52,990 --> 00:10:59,790 Yes, he's the ghost of Christmas future. 116 00:10:59,790 --> 00:11:01,470 Christmas future? 117 00:11:01,470 --> 00:11:03,210 He knows when everyone's going to die. 118 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:09,875 Ray. 119 00:11:09,875 --> 00:11:10,675 Ray. 120 00:11:14,745 --> 00:11:17,265 It's the season to be jolly. 121 00:11:17,265 --> 00:11:20,000 [LAUGHTER] 122 00:11:31,270 --> 00:11:34,546 Oh, what the fuck. 123 00:11:34,546 --> 00:11:37,498 [LAUGHTER] 124 00:11:39,470 --> 00:11:42,500 I think it's time for the Christmas Holly. 125 00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:43,728 Wait. Wait. 126 00:11:43,728 --> 00:11:44,770 Wait, no, no, no, no, no. 127 00:11:44,770 --> 00:11:45,570 Wait. 128 00:11:45,570 --> 00:11:47,350 Wait, no, no. 129 00:11:47,350 --> 00:12:04,800 [SCREAMS] 130 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:06,930 Wakey wakey. 131 00:12:06,930 --> 00:12:08,670 Did you like the Christmas decorations? 132 00:12:12,630 --> 00:12:14,430 The fuck's going on? 133 00:12:14,430 --> 00:12:17,190 Mr. Red is making things ready for Christmas. 134 00:12:17,190 --> 00:12:20,490 Please help me. 135 00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:22,770 Mr. Red is helping you, silly. 136 00:12:22,770 --> 00:12:24,480 Wait. 137 00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:26,980 I recognize you. 138 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:30,800 You're the girl that we're missing five years ago. 139 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:31,660 Her name is Chloe. 140 00:12:31,660 --> 00:12:34,590 Yes, that's me. 141 00:12:34,590 --> 00:12:36,210 What happened to you? 142 00:12:36,210 --> 00:12:38,520 I made new friends. 143 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:43,047 I still see my family from time to time, especially my brother, 144 00:12:43,047 --> 00:12:44,005 like a Christmas ghost. 145 00:12:49,260 --> 00:12:53,036 We had so much fun with the family of this house this year. 146 00:12:53,036 --> 00:12:55,814 [LAUGHTER] 147 00:12:57,210 --> 00:13:01,345 Those arrested, killed together, stay together. 148 00:13:01,345 --> 00:13:04,110 [LAUGHTER] 149 00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:11,280 Please. 150 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:14,850 Are you ready for some festive fun, Chloe. 151 00:13:14,850 --> 00:13:18,600 Mr. Red has a very fun surprise for you. 152 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:19,800 What are you doing? 153 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,690 Do you like lighting the Christmas pudding? 154 00:13:21,690 --> 00:13:22,650 Petrol. 155 00:13:22,650 --> 00:13:24,645 So much better than brandy. 156 00:13:24,645 --> 00:13:27,620 [LAUGHTER] 157 00:13:40,410 --> 00:13:44,230 Please, don't do it, please. 158 00:13:44,230 --> 00:13:46,351 Don't do it. 159 00:13:46,351 --> 00:13:49,213 [SCREAMING] 160 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:59,870 And this was a very dull Mr. Red gave to her right 161 00:13:59,870 --> 00:14:03,330 before they took a trip with all the dead bodies in the sleigh 162 00:14:03,330 --> 00:14:04,130 van. 163 00:14:06,735 --> 00:14:09,179 [LAUGHTER] 164 00:14:15,540 --> 00:14:16,400 Sleigh van. 165 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:17,690 Oh, yeah. 166 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:20,030 Diesel is more efficient than reindeer, 167 00:14:20,030 --> 00:14:24,890 and you can get more dead bodies in a white van, especially 168 00:14:24,890 --> 00:14:25,790 kids. 169 00:14:25,790 --> 00:14:26,870 Smaller. 170 00:14:26,870 --> 00:14:28,910 What happened to the girl? 171 00:14:28,910 --> 00:14:31,640 She went into child care. 172 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:34,030 If you can call it that. 173 00:14:34,030 --> 00:14:36,040 Strikes me she'd have been less dysfunctional 174 00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:38,980 if she'd stayed with the three escaped serial killers. 175 00:14:38,980 --> 00:14:43,060 Why were they dressed as a Santa, elf, and snowman? 176 00:14:43,060 --> 00:14:49,960 Mr. Red was a jolly arsonist who burnt down workshops. 177 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:54,880 Mr. Green was a terrorist who mailed out Christmas crackers 178 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:56,520 filled with explosives. 179 00:14:59,590 --> 00:15:04,780 And Mr. White, well, he froze people 180 00:15:04,780 --> 00:15:08,170 to eat for Christmas dinner. 181 00:15:08,170 --> 00:15:10,750 How did they all escape at once? 182 00:15:10,750 --> 00:15:14,950 Idiots put them all on the same ward, nicknamed them 183 00:15:14,950 --> 00:15:19,260 the three Christmas nutters, although they seriously 184 00:15:19,260 --> 00:15:21,750 underestimated the effectiveness of a Christmas tree 185 00:15:21,750 --> 00:15:24,040 as a battering ram. 186 00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:26,260 Jesus Christ. 187 00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:27,770 Oh, no. 188 00:15:27,770 --> 00:15:29,910 She never spoke to him. 189 00:15:29,910 --> 00:15:31,170 Funny, really. 190 00:15:31,170 --> 00:15:33,570 Whole festival dedicated to his birthday, 191 00:15:33,570 --> 00:15:36,420 and all anyone ever wants to do is write to me. 192 00:15:36,420 --> 00:15:39,000 The poor fucker was on a cross, died, 193 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,860 and all they want is fucking presents. 194 00:15:40,860 --> 00:15:43,230 I've got enough fucking work to do at Christmas. 195 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:53,405 Anyway, bloody Christmas. 196 00:15:53,405 --> 00:15:54,780 Now what else have I got in here? 197 00:15:54,780 --> 00:15:56,160 Oh, yeah. 198 00:15:56,160 --> 00:16:01,380 Now this is my new Teddy bear design. 199 00:16:01,380 --> 00:16:03,030 What do you think? 200 00:16:03,030 --> 00:16:05,450 I call him cuddles. 201 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,360 What happened to him? 202 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:19,803 Yeah, I think the elf in the workshop may have had issues. 203 00:16:19,803 --> 00:16:21,720 Reminds me of another bloke I know had issues. 204 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:26,140 I tell you what, I could tell you a story about him 205 00:16:26,140 --> 00:16:27,280 that would cheer you up. 206 00:16:33,350 --> 00:16:35,780 He looks all right. 207 00:16:35,780 --> 00:16:40,750 That is because this is Dr. White. 208 00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:42,850 You wait until you meet his counterpart. 209 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:51,610 This is a little festive tale I like to call the Ventriloquist 210 00:16:51,610 --> 00:16:53,270 Who Stole Christmas. 211 00:16:56,710 --> 00:17:00,910 So why did the man only wear one boot to town? 212 00:17:00,910 --> 00:17:04,314 Because the weather forecast only gave 50% chance of snow. 213 00:17:08,230 --> 00:17:10,900 Hey, do you know frosty the snowman reminds 214 00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:12,200 me of my dad, Dr. White? 215 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:13,000 Why? 216 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,849 Because he used to buy you lots of slush puppies? 217 00:17:15,849 --> 00:17:19,180 No, because he said he'd come back one day. 218 00:17:24,910 --> 00:17:29,230 I had a threesome with two princesses yesterday. 219 00:17:29,230 --> 00:17:30,580 That's disgusting, Dr. White. 220 00:17:30,580 --> 00:17:31,747 Why are you telling me that? 221 00:17:31,747 --> 00:17:36,747 Because you told me to let it go. 222 00:17:36,747 --> 00:17:37,830 Not like that, I didn't. 223 00:17:37,830 --> 00:17:40,410 If you carry on like that, they'll put you on a list. 224 00:17:40,410 --> 00:17:42,540 What sort of list? 225 00:17:42,540 --> 00:17:44,580 A. Very naughty list. 226 00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:45,960 Cool. 227 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:50,310 Well, I know where all the naughty girls are like Santa. 228 00:17:50,310 --> 00:17:52,560 No, not like Santa. 229 00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:53,970 Cool. 230 00:17:53,970 --> 00:17:59,570 Do you know why Santa doesn't have any kids? 231 00:17:59,570 --> 00:18:02,420 Because he only comes once a year. 232 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:05,810 Right. 233 00:18:05,810 --> 00:18:08,240 Well, I think we've seen enough. 234 00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:09,800 Mr. White. 235 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,640 Don't call us. 236 00:18:11,640 --> 00:18:16,110 Well, don't call us. 237 00:18:16,110 --> 00:18:18,150 Did you not like it? 238 00:18:18,150 --> 00:18:19,680 It's not quite what we're looking 239 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,890 for for this year's outbound for the elderly Christmas 240 00:18:22,890 --> 00:18:24,600 variety show. 241 00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,040 This is Margate. 242 00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:27,910 Hey, maybe you should head to Brighton. 243 00:18:27,910 --> 00:18:29,400 They like weird stuff there. 244 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:34,510 Here they like virulent, happy families, and warm coffins. 245 00:18:34,510 --> 00:18:36,970 Oh, I mean coffees. 246 00:18:36,970 --> 00:18:40,810 I can mix it up a bit and make it a bit more progressive. 247 00:18:40,810 --> 00:18:44,200 I think you've progressed as far as you can. 248 00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:47,110 Any more progressive I won't have to call the police. 249 00:18:47,110 --> 00:18:49,510 It's all just a bit, well, creepy. 250 00:18:49,510 --> 00:18:51,400 Well, Christmas is all about a fat man 251 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:54,550 climbing into people's homes and little children's bedrooms. 252 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:55,640 Quite, Dr. White. 253 00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:58,315 We've got lots of people to see and your time is-- 254 00:18:58,315 --> 00:19:00,640 was up. 255 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,408 Keep it on the down low, but we've got a break dancing 256 00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:05,200 reindeer who got through to the semi-finals 257 00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:06,430 of Britain's Got Talent. 258 00:19:13,140 --> 00:19:16,260 Hugo, we've got a problem. 259 00:19:16,260 --> 00:19:18,810 What is it, Leroy? 260 00:19:18,810 --> 00:19:20,800 It's Mrs. Crimpton. 261 00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:21,600 Oh, God. 262 00:19:24,190 --> 00:19:26,680 She turned up to do her annual striptease. 263 00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:28,430 Oh, God. 264 00:19:28,430 --> 00:19:30,580 Has she escaped from the hospital again? 265 00:19:30,580 --> 00:19:31,390 I think so. 266 00:19:31,390 --> 00:19:34,565 She's wearing one of those gowns without the back in. 267 00:19:34,565 --> 00:19:35,365 Oh. 268 00:19:38,860 --> 00:19:40,360 Hello, Henry. 269 00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:42,565 Oh, you're looking tired. 270 00:19:46,980 --> 00:19:49,090 You are not auditioning him. 271 00:19:49,090 --> 00:19:50,770 Don't be like that, Henry. 272 00:19:50,770 --> 00:19:54,010 Nothing wrong with a bit of healthy competition, 273 00:19:54,010 --> 00:19:58,290 although you are getting on a bit. 274 00:19:58,290 --> 00:20:00,780 It's called experience. 275 00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:02,730 It's one way of putting it. 276 00:20:02,730 --> 00:20:07,440 And don't you think your act's a little bit racist these days? 277 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:11,520 I mean, Dr. White? 278 00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:13,500 I'm a snowman. 279 00:20:13,500 --> 00:20:15,270 That's a politically incorrect snow 280 00:20:15,270 --> 00:20:21,390 person, unlike myself, Professor Trueheart and Bobbin Buttons. 281 00:20:21,390 --> 00:20:23,550 You're a fucking cunt. 282 00:20:23,550 --> 00:20:24,570 What did you say? 283 00:20:24,570 --> 00:20:25,620 I said you're-- 284 00:20:25,620 --> 00:20:27,750 Don't talk, Dr. White. 285 00:20:27,750 --> 00:20:31,370 Are you having another meltdown? 286 00:20:31,370 --> 00:20:34,120 Rehab not go well. 287 00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:35,710 He Stole my father's act. 288 00:20:35,710 --> 00:20:39,190 , Henry no one cares about your father and his lame 289 00:20:39,190 --> 00:20:40,810 ass forgotten show in Norway. 290 00:20:46,740 --> 00:20:48,240 Don't talk about my father. 291 00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:57,690 As the lawyers told you, there's 292 00:20:57,690 --> 00:21:01,260 not a copyright on Snowman, and Bobbins and I 293 00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:02,970 sell a lot better than you. 294 00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:04,620 I mean, let's face it. 295 00:21:04,620 --> 00:21:06,810 It's not like I've won the children's award 296 00:21:06,810 --> 00:21:09,030 of Margate five years in a row. 297 00:21:09,030 --> 00:21:11,290 Oh, wait, that's a coincidence. 298 00:21:11,290 --> 00:21:12,090 I actually have. 299 00:21:12,090 --> 00:21:14,705 [LAUGHTER] 300 00:21:17,050 --> 00:21:22,300 I could be as big as you, but I've got principles. 301 00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:24,040 I've got a newsflash for you, Henry. 302 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:26,020 Wake up granddad. 303 00:21:26,020 --> 00:21:28,120 Your act is dead. 304 00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:38,910 For the love of God, why are there two snowmen 305 00:21:38,910 --> 00:21:41,850 having a fight on my fucking stage? 306 00:21:41,850 --> 00:21:46,755 Leroy, get them out of here and fetch me a ginseng tea. 307 00:21:49,290 --> 00:21:50,310 Fuck. 308 00:21:50,310 --> 00:21:53,040 This, is Prancer the reindeer breakdancer. 309 00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:54,570 Yeah, no shit. 310 00:21:54,570 --> 00:21:55,590 Hello. 311 00:21:55,590 --> 00:21:57,480 No, am I on stage now then or? 312 00:22:16,650 --> 00:22:18,540 Don't worry, Dr. White. 313 00:22:18,540 --> 00:22:19,920 You'll get the next job. 314 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:20,880 Yes, we will. 315 00:22:23,605 --> 00:22:24,405 Dr. White? 316 00:22:29,110 --> 00:22:30,670 These are those Christmas adverts. 317 00:22:30,670 --> 00:22:32,020 Nah, man. 318 00:22:32,020 --> 00:22:34,690 It's the bad boy, did the cookie adverts. 319 00:22:34,690 --> 00:22:36,910 Yeah, it's him. 320 00:22:41,950 --> 00:22:42,750 Come on, man. 321 00:22:42,750 --> 00:22:43,950 Cheer up. 322 00:22:43,950 --> 00:22:46,620 Yeah, it's Christmas. 323 00:22:46,620 --> 00:22:47,760 Yo, where's the puppet? 324 00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:50,730 [LAUGHTER] 325 00:23:12,550 --> 00:23:14,680 Fuck off. 326 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:17,980 You want to see the act, big man. 327 00:23:17,980 --> 00:23:20,460 Come on. 328 00:23:20,460 --> 00:23:23,290 Don't trouble, guys. 329 00:23:23,290 --> 00:23:25,740 Raise your festive cheer, wacker. 330 00:23:25,740 --> 00:23:27,160 [MOCKING LAUGHTER] 331 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:29,770 I'm Dr. White. 332 00:23:29,770 --> 00:23:31,210 What's that? 333 00:23:31,210 --> 00:23:32,862 Why don't you shut up? 334 00:23:32,862 --> 00:23:35,380 [GRUNTS] 335 00:23:35,380 --> 00:23:39,710 Man, oh, dear. 336 00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,285 We all know no English now. 337 00:23:52,770 --> 00:23:53,790 Come on, let's go. 338 00:23:53,790 --> 00:23:54,590 Let's go. 339 00:23:57,910 --> 00:23:59,481 [GROANING] 340 00:24:41,010 --> 00:24:43,530 Henry, what's happened to your face? 341 00:24:46,650 --> 00:24:49,940 Tragic crowd surfing accident. 342 00:24:49,940 --> 00:24:52,400 Sarcasm doesn't help with your problems. 343 00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:55,310 But what excuse do you have for your face then? 344 00:24:55,310 --> 00:24:58,850 And I thought we agreed no more puppets at our meetings. 345 00:24:58,850 --> 00:25:00,500 He's having a sudden act. 346 00:25:03,130 --> 00:25:05,560 Do you want to tell me what happened at the school? 347 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:10,130 And that's why there'll be no snow in Africa this year 348 00:25:10,130 --> 00:25:11,900 because of your parents. 349 00:25:11,900 --> 00:25:13,970 But how are we supposed to get anywhere 350 00:25:13,970 --> 00:25:15,510 if we can't use planes? 351 00:25:15,510 --> 00:25:16,310 Swim. 352 00:25:16,310 --> 00:25:18,650 I can't swim to Disneyland. 353 00:25:18,650 --> 00:25:20,930 Think of the Dolphins. 354 00:25:20,930 --> 00:25:21,950 Fuck the Dolphins. 355 00:25:21,950 --> 00:25:23,480 Oh, shut up, you little-- 356 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,180 Cunt. 357 00:25:25,180 --> 00:25:28,930 Conservation Under National Threat. 358 00:25:28,930 --> 00:25:31,510 Exactly. 359 00:25:31,510 --> 00:25:35,830 I wasn't swearing. 360 00:25:35,830 --> 00:25:38,570 Is it any wonder you lost the job? 361 00:25:38,570 --> 00:25:40,430 Don't start that again. 362 00:25:40,430 --> 00:25:41,990 It's not funny. 363 00:25:41,990 --> 00:25:45,780 Apparently, I'm not that funny anymore. 364 00:25:45,780 --> 00:25:47,850 Going around teaching global warming to kids. 365 00:25:47,850 --> 00:25:53,620 Seriously, who cares if the ice caps melt? 366 00:25:53,620 --> 00:25:56,560 And why is it you're teaching to year-sevens? 367 00:25:56,560 --> 00:26:00,760 Because my co-worker got caught doing cocaine, shooting 368 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:04,620 snow sprinkled cookie adverts. 369 00:26:04,620 --> 00:26:08,340 Well, the official line is you had a breakdown, 370 00:26:08,340 --> 00:26:10,170 the company didn't want to get sued, 371 00:26:10,170 --> 00:26:12,840 and what with all the kids on set and the snowman 372 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:17,520 snorting all the snow, but yes, it's not a good look 373 00:26:17,520 --> 00:26:18,960 for a children's entertainer. 374 00:26:21,850 --> 00:26:24,700 That's all I am to you, isn't it? 375 00:26:24,700 --> 00:26:27,910 A children's entertainer. 376 00:26:27,910 --> 00:26:30,340 And I can't even get a job in Southern Panto. 377 00:26:30,340 --> 00:26:33,460 Henry, I am not your agent. 378 00:26:33,460 --> 00:26:34,840 I am your therapist. 379 00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:38,130 Yeah, so you keep reminding me. 380 00:26:38,130 --> 00:26:40,500 I can't get one of those anymore. 381 00:26:40,500 --> 00:26:46,070 Maybe it's a good idea to think about another career. 382 00:26:46,070 --> 00:26:48,830 Get out of the ventriloquist business. 383 00:26:48,830 --> 00:26:50,097 It could do you good. 384 00:26:50,097 --> 00:26:51,680 What would the memory of your father-- 385 00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,330 Don't say it. 386 00:26:53,330 --> 00:26:55,940 Don't mention my father. 387 00:26:59,180 --> 00:27:02,270 You always have to twist it round back to my childhood. 388 00:27:05,336 --> 00:27:09,040 You need to bury the past. 389 00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:15,520 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 390 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:17,185 What are you saying now? 391 00:27:20,910 --> 00:27:22,665 He said you're being very helpful. 392 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:33,230 Time's up. 393 00:27:33,230 --> 00:27:35,215 I'll see you next Friday, without the puppet. 394 00:27:43,140 --> 00:27:44,260 It's time to go. 395 00:27:44,260 --> 00:27:45,550 He's going to be here soon. 396 00:27:45,550 --> 00:27:46,420 Who cares? 397 00:27:46,420 --> 00:27:47,890 You're leaving him anyway. 398 00:27:47,890 --> 00:27:48,690 I know. 399 00:27:48,690 --> 00:27:50,080 He's fucking weird in the head. 400 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,410 Just like his dad then. 401 00:27:51,410 --> 00:27:52,210 Yeah. 402 00:27:52,210 --> 00:27:54,430 You know he doesn't even talk to his mom. 403 00:27:54,430 --> 00:27:57,320 There's only something off there. 404 00:27:57,320 --> 00:27:58,360 Forget about him. 405 00:27:58,360 --> 00:27:59,552 You don't get it, Brandon. 406 00:27:59,552 --> 00:28:01,510 His dad didn't just leave him with that puppet. 407 00:28:01,510 --> 00:28:04,000 He left him with a whole load of crazy. 408 00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:06,730 I can think of a lot better things to do with my hands 409 00:28:06,730 --> 00:28:08,130 than play with a puppet. 410 00:28:08,130 --> 00:28:10,270 I'm sure you can. 411 00:28:10,270 --> 00:28:12,280 I dread to think what he thinks about you. 412 00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:13,270 Oh, don't. 413 00:28:13,270 --> 00:28:15,535 Like, it's too creepy to even think about. 414 00:28:15,535 --> 00:28:17,470 You know he's into you though. 415 00:28:17,470 --> 00:28:18,940 Yeah, I know. 416 00:28:18,940 --> 00:28:20,420 It's all for me. 417 00:28:20,420 --> 00:28:21,910 You living with him. 418 00:28:21,910 --> 00:28:24,840 Don't you think you're giving him mixed signals? 419 00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:28,000 Fuck off. 420 00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:30,363 Does he notice you stealing all this snow? 421 00:28:30,363 --> 00:28:31,780 Yeah, why do you think I'd stay? 422 00:28:31,780 --> 00:28:33,905 It'll be some perks living with the snowman, right? 423 00:28:33,905 --> 00:28:36,780 [LAUGHTER] 424 00:28:36,780 --> 00:28:40,590 Oh, and for my next trick, this assistant's 425 00:28:40,590 --> 00:28:41,890 going to make it snow. 426 00:28:41,890 --> 00:28:42,690 Fuck shit. 427 00:28:42,690 --> 00:28:44,290 He's here. 428 00:28:44,290 --> 00:28:45,090 Get dressed. 429 00:28:49,690 --> 00:28:53,090 Back early from therapy. 430 00:28:53,090 --> 00:28:54,890 What the fuck happened? 431 00:28:54,890 --> 00:28:56,210 You been drinking again. 432 00:28:56,210 --> 00:28:59,202 It's nothing. 433 00:28:59,202 --> 00:29:00,785 Where were you today for the audition? 434 00:29:04,490 --> 00:29:06,410 I really needed you. 435 00:29:06,410 --> 00:29:09,240 I told you, Henry, I don't want to be your assistant anymore. 436 00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:10,040 Don't you get it? 437 00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,770 We've not made any money since you came back from rehab. 438 00:29:12,770 --> 00:29:19,190 But listen, I've got a really good idea for a new TV show. 439 00:29:19,190 --> 00:29:22,440 It's going to be really good. 440 00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:26,680 So just wait a little longer here. 441 00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:27,565 Face it, Henry. 442 00:29:27,565 --> 00:29:29,440 You're never going to be as good as your dad. 443 00:29:32,780 --> 00:29:36,520 Please, I know that I can turn this act around. 444 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:37,320 Don't you get it? 445 00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:40,160 People are not into this puppet stuff anymore. 446 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:42,680 They're into like CGI and superhero shit, 447 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:45,140 not a fucking talking snowman. 448 00:29:45,140 --> 00:29:48,800 Any day now, people are going to want puppets again. 449 00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:51,170 Listen, Henry. 450 00:29:51,170 --> 00:29:53,080 I've got an agent. 451 00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,733 I might as well tell you now, but I'm moving to London. 452 00:29:55,733 --> 00:29:57,400 I've actually got an audition next week. 453 00:29:57,400 --> 00:29:58,442 It's for [INAUDIBLE] too. 454 00:29:58,442 --> 00:30:02,690 It's going to be like a real art house piece. 455 00:30:02,690 --> 00:30:05,730 You can't leave me. 456 00:30:05,730 --> 00:30:08,550 If you leave me now, you'll regret it. 457 00:30:08,550 --> 00:30:12,150 Your show's shit, just like everything else you do. 458 00:30:12,150 --> 00:30:14,040 Listen, mate. 459 00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,710 It's over. 460 00:30:16,710 --> 00:30:18,420 Who's this? 461 00:30:18,420 --> 00:30:22,980 Someone who doesn't play with toys for a fucking living. 462 00:30:22,980 --> 00:30:24,040 What are you? 463 00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:24,840 50? 464 00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:27,200 Leave it, Brandon. 465 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:28,590 Can't leave me for him. 466 00:30:28,590 --> 00:30:31,830 He, unlike you, he actually believes in me, 467 00:30:31,830 --> 00:30:34,050 that I'm not going to be some stupid assistant 468 00:30:34,050 --> 00:30:36,000 to a fucking freak like you. 469 00:30:41,575 --> 00:30:42,450 I won't let you go. 470 00:30:45,530 --> 00:30:48,030 You don't have a choice, mate. 471 00:31:01,530 --> 00:31:04,110 Come on, Jade. 472 00:31:04,110 --> 00:31:05,340 I'll wait in the car for you. 473 00:31:14,170 --> 00:31:16,410 It's over, Henry. 474 00:31:16,410 --> 00:31:18,330 Just like your stupid puppet show. 475 00:31:32,840 --> 00:33:27,920 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 476 00:34:52,726 --> 00:34:55,708 [MUSIC PLAYING] 477 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:38,970 Look at you laying there. 478 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:39,900 You're pathetic. 479 00:35:42,740 --> 00:35:45,080 You scare the kids. 480 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:49,130 Yeah you're a loser, Henry. 481 00:35:49,130 --> 00:35:51,725 That's why you don't win any awards. 482 00:35:59,210 --> 00:36:00,680 Face it. 483 00:36:00,680 --> 00:36:05,210 You should have died in Norway like your father, 484 00:36:05,210 --> 00:36:09,897 but now, you're going to die in Margate. 485 00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:22,870 What time is it? 486 00:36:22,870 --> 00:36:24,760 It's time to get up, Henry. 487 00:36:34,790 --> 00:36:37,670 [MUSIC PLAYING] 488 00:36:47,530 --> 00:36:49,060 All right, me darling. 489 00:36:49,060 --> 00:36:52,630 Let's get you going. 490 00:36:52,630 --> 00:36:56,685 Now you've been taking your tablets because you know if you 491 00:36:56,685 --> 00:36:58,060 don't, you're going to have to go 492 00:36:58,060 --> 00:36:59,410 and stay in the special house. 493 00:36:59,410 --> 00:37:01,840 We have to sign out the knives, don't you 494 00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,320 if you want to make a sandwich. 495 00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:06,550 Yes. 496 00:37:06,550 --> 00:37:09,610 I've been taking my medication, Doris. 497 00:37:09,610 --> 00:37:12,620 I'm very glad to hear that, Henry. 498 00:37:12,620 --> 00:37:15,000 Now what have you got on there me lover? 499 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:17,430 Hey, hey, hey, come on. 500 00:37:17,430 --> 00:37:21,280 This-- this is for your own safety. 501 00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:23,730 You know you're not supposed to have any ties, 502 00:37:23,730 --> 00:37:25,230 no dressing gown coats. 503 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,160 Don't want to end up like your old pa. 504 00:37:43,050 --> 00:37:46,130 It was time you used getting dressed anyways. 505 00:37:46,130 --> 00:37:48,670 Dirty Doris. 506 00:37:48,670 --> 00:37:49,470 What was that? 507 00:37:53,170 --> 00:37:54,670 He said goodbye, Doris. 508 00:37:57,530 --> 00:37:59,383 Right. 509 00:37:59,383 --> 00:38:01,050 I'll go and check the rest of the place. 510 00:38:01,050 --> 00:38:01,920 Don't you move. 511 00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:02,820 I'll be right back. 512 00:38:06,060 --> 00:38:07,320 What's this doing here? 513 00:38:11,060 --> 00:38:12,440 I'll be taking this with me now. 514 00:38:24,632 --> 00:38:35,100 [BELL DINGS] 515 00:38:35,100 --> 00:38:36,160 Mr. White. 516 00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:37,290 DCI Hamilton. 517 00:38:37,290 --> 00:38:38,762 DCI Cross. 518 00:38:38,762 --> 00:38:40,470 May we come in and have a word, please. 519 00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:45,890 Is this going to take long? 520 00:38:45,890 --> 00:38:46,690 Why? 521 00:38:46,690 --> 00:38:47,898 Have you got somewhere to be? 522 00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:52,240 Yeah, I do actually. 523 00:38:52,240 --> 00:38:56,230 I've got an interview about a new TV show I'm making. 524 00:38:56,230 --> 00:38:58,480 Are you going with or without your trousers? 525 00:39:03,925 --> 00:39:05,675 Is that the puppet your dad used to use? 526 00:39:09,620 --> 00:39:11,570 Have you come about my puppet? 527 00:39:11,570 --> 00:39:17,950 No, we're not interested in booking any children's parties. 528 00:39:17,950 --> 00:39:21,170 Brian McHugh, better known as Professor Trueheart, 529 00:39:21,170 --> 00:39:21,970 has gone missing. 530 00:39:25,270 --> 00:39:27,790 Oh, I am sorry to hear that. 531 00:39:27,790 --> 00:39:31,510 His puppet's gone too. 532 00:39:31,510 --> 00:39:34,270 Well, no one would want that thing. 533 00:39:34,270 --> 00:39:37,240 Least of all, me. 534 00:39:37,240 --> 00:39:39,570 I've got my own, haven't I? 535 00:39:39,570 --> 00:39:40,950 We heard you had an altercation 536 00:39:40,950 --> 00:39:43,600 down at the Tom Thumb Theater. 537 00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:46,280 He stole my father's act. 538 00:39:46,280 --> 00:39:51,220 I was standing up for what's mine and my father's. 539 00:39:51,220 --> 00:39:52,780 He killed himself, didn't he? 540 00:39:52,780 --> 00:39:54,227 Your father? 541 00:39:54,227 --> 00:39:55,810 Must have been hard on you as a kid, 542 00:39:55,810 --> 00:39:57,227 but with your mom leaving as well. 543 00:39:57,227 --> 00:39:58,720 Yeah, where'd she go? 544 00:39:58,720 --> 00:40:01,560 Well, you tell me. 545 00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:03,750 You seem to know a lot about me. 546 00:40:03,750 --> 00:40:06,520 Well, we know your mom went missing, was never found. 547 00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:09,450 We also a group of young girls in Norway around that area 548 00:40:09,450 --> 00:40:12,220 went missing right about the same time, 549 00:40:12,220 --> 00:40:16,600 surely before your dad took his own life. 550 00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:18,460 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 551 00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:19,010 I don't like where are you going with this. 552 00:41:19,010 --> 00:41:23,510 Those young girls had nothing to do with my father. 553 00:41:23,510 --> 00:41:27,250 Just making conversation. 554 00:41:27,250 --> 00:41:29,200 So you know nothing about Brian McHugh. 555 00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:32,380 The last time I saw him was at the theater yesterday. 556 00:41:32,380 --> 00:41:34,990 Well, if you do think of anything, give us a call. 557 00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:42,800 We'll show ourselves out. 558 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:47,100 Oh, and good luck with the TV show. 559 00:41:47,100 --> 00:41:48,795 Yeah, don't forget your trousers. 560 00:42:01,225 --> 00:42:02,025 Fuck. 561 00:42:07,780 --> 00:42:10,180 We're sorry Mr. White, but we're going to have 562 00:42:10,180 --> 00:42:11,727 to cancel your interview today. 563 00:42:11,727 --> 00:42:13,810 We don't think you're quite right for this channel 564 00:42:13,810 --> 00:42:14,658 moving forward. 565 00:42:14,658 --> 00:42:15,700 We wish you all the best. 566 00:42:22,720 --> 00:42:32,034 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 567 00:42:32,034 --> 00:42:38,402 [BELL DINGS] 568 00:42:38,402 --> 00:42:40,110 It's built for carol singers, isn't it? 569 00:42:49,730 --> 00:42:51,590 You're right? 570 00:42:51,590 --> 00:42:53,390 Who are you? 571 00:42:53,390 --> 00:42:57,210 I can be whoever you want me to be. 572 00:42:57,210 --> 00:42:58,530 I didn't call you. 573 00:42:58,530 --> 00:43:00,495 Well, someone did. 574 00:43:00,495 --> 00:43:01,995 I ain't leaving till I've been paid. 575 00:43:16,740 --> 00:43:21,080 My father once brought a girl like you back to our house. 576 00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:21,880 Oh, yeah. 577 00:43:32,855 --> 00:43:34,105 Would you like a cup of tea? 578 00:43:37,290 --> 00:43:39,010 Don't know the first thing I'm asked? 579 00:43:39,010 --> 00:43:39,850 Go on then. 580 00:43:39,850 --> 00:43:40,900 Milk, no sugar. 581 00:43:40,900 --> 00:43:41,710 Sweet enough. 582 00:43:53,440 --> 00:43:56,620 What the fuck is this thing? 583 00:43:56,620 --> 00:43:57,460 That's Dr. White. 584 00:43:59,730 --> 00:44:00,530 What? 585 00:44:00,530 --> 00:44:02,930 I always get the weird ones. 586 00:44:02,930 --> 00:44:03,770 Why is he a doctor? 587 00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:10,360 He fixes things, especially people. 588 00:44:13,450 --> 00:44:15,980 Well, I like what you've done with the place. 589 00:44:15,980 --> 00:44:17,530 Makes a change in the back of a car. 590 00:44:20,295 --> 00:44:29,790 [MUSIC PLAYING] 591 00:44:29,790 --> 00:44:31,980 Got any biscuits? 592 00:44:31,980 --> 00:44:34,710 No, sorry. 593 00:44:34,710 --> 00:44:37,480 I'm on a diet. 594 00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:40,760 The doctor said I've got to cut back. 595 00:44:40,760 --> 00:44:43,310 A real doctor or doctor puppet? 596 00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:48,190 Dr. White is a real doctor. 597 00:44:48,190 --> 00:44:50,140 Sorry if I hurt his feelings. 598 00:44:55,610 --> 00:44:57,440 Hey, could I record you? 599 00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:00,080 I don't do videos, mate. 600 00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:04,560 No, Dr. White and I are putting together a new act. 601 00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:05,670 Act? 602 00:45:05,670 --> 00:45:07,420 Yeah. 603 00:45:07,420 --> 00:45:11,990 We're putting together a pilot for a new TV show. 604 00:45:11,990 --> 00:45:17,210 Our last assistant left. 605 00:45:17,210 --> 00:45:21,510 Hey, would you like to be the star of my new show? 606 00:45:21,510 --> 00:45:23,000 I'm-- I'm not sure. 607 00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,423 Yeah, let me show you what Dr. White 608 00:45:25,423 --> 00:45:26,715 and I've been putting together. 609 00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:34,740 What is this? 610 00:45:49,683 --> 00:45:50,725 I'm leaving now, Henry. 611 00:46:00,340 --> 00:46:02,290 The fuck is wrong with you, Henry? 612 00:46:02,290 --> 00:46:05,275 Don't talk to him, he just pulls the sleigh. 613 00:46:09,520 --> 00:46:11,630 Jade, what's taking you so long? 614 00:46:11,630 --> 00:46:12,430 [MUSIC PLAYING] 615 00:46:12,430 --> 00:46:15,850 [INAUDIBLE] have turned white. 616 00:46:15,850 --> 00:46:18,710 Santa is dropping bombs tonight. 617 00:46:18,710 --> 00:46:19,510 Jade. 618 00:46:19,510 --> 00:46:20,310 [MUSIC PLAYING] 619 00:46:20,310 --> 00:46:28,960 It's getting cold is the snow, and I know you won't be home. 620 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:34,050 I'm changing you in fall out light. 621 00:46:34,050 --> 00:46:38,160 And I can see your lips turning blue. 622 00:46:38,160 --> 00:46:39,155 I shouldn't-- 623 00:46:39,155 --> 00:46:39,955 What the fuck? 624 00:46:42,950 --> 00:46:45,970 What the fuck, you sick fucking bastard! 625 00:46:45,970 --> 00:46:46,810 Please, no. 626 00:46:46,810 --> 00:46:48,610 [CRYING], please. 627 00:46:48,610 --> 00:46:51,190 Get off me! 628 00:46:51,190 --> 00:46:54,130 Fucking bastard, let me go! 629 00:46:54,130 --> 00:46:57,920 He's got brain freeze. 630 00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:00,910 [LAUGHTER] 631 00:47:00,910 --> 00:47:12,240 [SCREAMING] 632 00:47:12,240 --> 00:47:13,040 [MUSIC PLAYING] 633 00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:16,812 They would be pulling out of town. 634 00:47:16,812 --> 00:47:18,288 Starting [INAUDIBLE]. 635 00:47:22,230 --> 00:47:31,421 My hunting rifle ordered here, watching ash fall from the sky, 636 00:47:31,421 --> 00:47:32,221 Henry. 637 00:47:34,528 --> 00:47:35,328 [MUSIC PLAYING] 638 00:47:35,328 --> 00:47:39,040 None of the children gone to hunt-- 639 00:47:41,650 --> 00:47:44,500 Henry. 640 00:47:44,500 --> 00:47:46,120 This Pinocchio. 641 00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:47,950 Let me go, please. 642 00:47:47,950 --> 00:47:51,790 Thought he was a real boy. 643 00:47:51,790 --> 00:47:53,010 No! 644 00:47:53,010 --> 00:47:55,330 Dr. White, fix him. 645 00:47:58,240 --> 00:48:02,350 I got strings to hold me up. 646 00:48:02,350 --> 00:48:06,252 Pinocchio, he's waving at you through the River Martis. 647 00:48:06,252 --> 00:48:08,277 [SINISTER LAUGHTER] 648 00:48:10,622 --> 00:48:12,220 Please let me go. 649 00:48:12,220 --> 00:48:14,041 [CRYING] 650 00:48:14,041 --> 00:48:16,730 [SCREAMING] 651 00:48:16,730 --> 00:48:17,530 No. 652 00:48:19,835 --> 00:48:20,635 No. 653 00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:28,760 The puppet show. 654 00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:31,022 [LAUGHTER] 655 00:48:33,940 --> 00:48:38,510 Oh, Oh, Franza, what are you doing? 656 00:48:38,510 --> 00:48:41,030 Oh, I'm just hanging around. 657 00:48:41,030 --> 00:48:44,210 [LAUGHTER] 658 00:48:44,210 --> 00:48:48,110 I was stupid to think that I could ever replace 659 00:48:48,110 --> 00:48:51,590 this sweet and talented Henry. 660 00:48:51,590 --> 00:48:58,030 Wolfe, he's got the best act in the whole of Margate. 661 00:48:58,030 --> 00:49:00,928 [LAUGHTER] 662 00:49:08,820 --> 00:49:09,620 Oh, my God. 663 00:49:09,620 --> 00:49:10,610 Jesus. 664 00:49:10,610 --> 00:49:11,630 Oh, my God. 665 00:49:11,630 --> 00:49:12,890 Oh, my God. 666 00:49:12,890 --> 00:49:14,120 Oh, God. 667 00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:15,300 Oh, shit. 668 00:49:15,300 --> 00:49:17,090 Oh, oh, my God. 669 00:49:22,070 --> 00:49:24,560 I haven't been taking my happy pills. 670 00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:27,326 [LAUGHTER] 671 00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:31,920 I didn't need a mouth. 672 00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:34,350 Consider yourself checked out. 673 00:49:41,220 --> 00:49:43,845 I wonder what they're dreaming about. 674 00:49:57,160 --> 00:50:02,400 Henry, what are you doing. 675 00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:04,200 I'm sorry. 676 00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:06,030 I brought the puppet with me again. 677 00:50:09,050 --> 00:50:10,580 We've been having fun. 678 00:50:14,150 --> 00:50:16,950 Henry, you're not supposed to be here. 679 00:50:16,950 --> 00:50:18,500 You were right. 680 00:50:18,500 --> 00:50:23,690 There are some things I didn't tell you about my father. 681 00:50:23,690 --> 00:50:27,620 He used to kill young girls. 682 00:50:27,620 --> 00:50:32,390 And then he'd make love to their bodies in the snow. 683 00:50:32,390 --> 00:50:35,405 My mother found his trophies. 684 00:50:35,405 --> 00:50:46,210 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 685 00:50:46,210 --> 00:50:48,130 That's why she had to die. 686 00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:52,960 He wasn't all bad, though. 687 00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:54,190 He dealt with those bullies. 688 00:51:04,740 --> 00:51:06,800 Just going to call for help. 689 00:51:06,800 --> 00:51:09,200 There's no help. 690 00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,120 Dr. White got rid of them all. 691 00:51:28,950 --> 00:51:32,035 Oh, I'm sorry, we're out of time. 692 00:51:37,270 --> 00:51:39,790 Oh, that'll be our date. 693 00:51:39,790 --> 00:51:42,420 Let's put the awards out. 694 00:51:42,420 --> 00:51:43,725 You dirty old bugger. 695 00:51:50,216 --> 00:51:52,200 [DOOR CREAKING] 696 00:51:56,664 --> 00:52:02,120 [LAUGHTER] 697 00:52:02,120 --> 00:52:03,610 [CAT CALL] 698 00:52:03,610 --> 00:52:05,070 Fuck off. 699 00:52:05,070 --> 00:52:06,210 Right, darling. 700 00:52:06,210 --> 00:52:10,830 Want us to show you a good time this Christmas? 701 00:52:10,830 --> 00:52:13,760 [JINGLE BELLS] 702 00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:16,719 Mate, did you hear that? 703 00:52:16,719 --> 00:52:19,214 [JINGLE BELLS] 704 00:52:31,705 --> 00:52:32,505 Guys. 705 00:52:32,505 --> 00:52:35,355 [GASPING] 706 00:52:35,355 --> 00:52:38,325 [JINGLE BELLS] 707 00:52:58,620 --> 00:53:01,350 [SCREAMS] 708 00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:22,670 So why did the man want a divorce? 709 00:53:22,670 --> 00:53:25,190 Because his wife was a total flake. 710 00:53:25,190 --> 00:53:26,940 [LAUGHTER] 711 00:53:26,940 --> 00:53:27,740 Thank you. 712 00:53:27,740 --> 00:53:29,600 Thank you. 713 00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:31,310 Tough crowd, Dr. White. 714 00:53:38,730 --> 00:53:41,560 Eloy, where are you? 715 00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:44,980 I told you to lock up. 716 00:53:44,980 --> 00:53:48,505 Franza, I told you you didn't make the cut. 717 00:54:10,940 --> 00:54:15,510 I remember laying in bed as a kid waiting for Santa to come. 718 00:54:15,510 --> 00:54:17,390 Oh, yes, Dr. White. 719 00:54:17,390 --> 00:54:21,050 Yes, then there was always that awkward silence 720 00:54:21,050 --> 00:54:22,565 as he got dressed and left. 721 00:54:30,890 --> 00:54:34,720 They're still not laughing, Henry. 722 00:54:34,720 --> 00:54:37,450 That's because you knocked them dead, Dr. White. 723 00:54:37,450 --> 00:54:40,378 [MUSIC PLAYING] 724 00:54:51,630 --> 00:54:53,400 So what do you think. 725 00:54:57,420 --> 00:55:00,410 I have a great role for you. 726 00:55:00,410 --> 00:55:01,710 Can I use your bathroom? 727 00:55:01,710 --> 00:55:02,510 Sure. 728 00:55:02,510 --> 00:55:06,067 Me and Dr. White I'll be waiting for you. 729 00:55:06,067 --> 00:55:07,400 Can't wait to get your feedback. 730 00:55:25,830 --> 00:55:28,380 What's taking you so long? 731 00:55:28,380 --> 00:55:30,840 Dr. White is worried about you. 732 00:55:30,840 --> 00:55:31,980 I'll be out in a sec. 733 00:55:35,370 --> 00:55:37,470 We're going to make you a star. 734 00:55:37,470 --> 00:55:38,460 Stay away from me. 735 00:55:43,350 --> 00:55:47,040 This Christmas, everyone's got to love puppets again. 736 00:56:07,396 --> 00:56:09,208 We come with a search wa-- 737 00:56:16,035 --> 00:56:17,410 I think I just killed a client. 738 00:56:20,050 --> 00:56:21,704 Bloody Christmas. 739 00:56:21,704 --> 00:56:23,520 [MUSIC PLAYING] 740 00:56:23,520 --> 00:56:31,640 Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo 741 00:56:31,640 --> 00:56:40,300 doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo 742 00:56:40,300 --> 00:56:46,750 doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo 743 00:56:46,750 --> 00:56:56,940 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH] 744 00:56:56,940 --> 00:56:59,760 How would you like to make a snowman? 745 00:56:59,760 --> 00:57:02,520 Like Dr. White? 746 00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:04,920 No, I want to make a normal snowman. 747 00:57:04,920 --> 00:57:07,930 Aha, normal snowmen are boring. 748 00:57:07,930 --> 00:57:11,580 They just melt like humans and let you down. 749 00:57:11,580 --> 00:57:13,530 Humans don't melt. 750 00:57:13,530 --> 00:57:15,780 They do if you put them in a blast furnace, 751 00:57:15,780 --> 00:57:17,400 or pour acid on them. 752 00:57:17,400 --> 00:57:21,360 Why have you come especially for me, Santa? 753 00:57:21,360 --> 00:57:24,960 I've been told you've been feeling unwell, 754 00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:27,330 and your parents called me up from North Pole 755 00:57:27,330 --> 00:57:30,360 to cheer you up. 756 00:57:30,360 --> 00:57:33,480 Well, I'm-- I'm feeling a lot better now. 757 00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:36,450 I wouldn't want to hold you up delivering presents. 758 00:57:36,450 --> 00:57:38,820 Oh, don't you worry about them. 759 00:57:38,820 --> 00:57:43,250 Most of the other kids have been naughty this year. 760 00:57:43,250 --> 00:57:47,980 I know a kid of your age who was visited by Krampus instead. 761 00:57:47,980 --> 00:57:49,150 Krampus? 762 00:57:49,150 --> 00:57:53,500 However bad you might feel this Christmas, 763 00:57:53,500 --> 00:57:58,360 it is nothing like being visited by Krampus. 764 00:57:58,360 --> 00:58:02,830 Now this is a little story me and my elves 765 00:58:02,830 --> 00:58:07,000 call Merry Krampus. 766 00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:16,575 And this, this is the last toy Luke ever played with. 767 00:58:19,180 --> 00:58:19,980 Come on, Luke. 768 00:58:19,980 --> 00:58:21,350 Time for bed. 769 00:58:21,350 --> 00:58:23,767 You know it's your last day of school before the Christmas 770 00:58:23,767 --> 00:58:25,080 holidays tomorrow. 771 00:58:25,080 --> 00:58:25,880 Come on. 772 00:58:31,560 --> 00:58:36,420 Will daddy you come and visit us this Christmas? 773 00:58:36,420 --> 00:58:38,850 Or will he stay with the new lady he likes? 774 00:58:42,260 --> 00:58:46,340 I guess I won't be getting into the robot toy this Christmas. 775 00:58:46,340 --> 00:58:48,920 I'm sure daddy's going to get you something really nice 776 00:58:48,920 --> 00:58:50,090 for Christmas. 777 00:58:50,090 --> 00:58:52,185 You know he loves you very much. 778 00:58:52,185 --> 00:58:52,985 And you? 779 00:58:58,170 --> 00:59:00,285 Like I said, he loves you very, very much. 780 00:59:03,010 --> 00:59:04,570 Sweet dreams, OK? 781 00:59:09,839 --> 00:59:12,713 [PHONE RINGING] 782 00:59:16,080 --> 00:59:18,570 Hey, where are you? 783 00:59:18,570 --> 00:59:20,280 Nowhere. 784 00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:21,180 Well, hurry up. 785 00:59:21,180 --> 00:59:23,430 I have a surprise waiting for you. 786 00:59:23,430 --> 00:59:24,840 I'm freezing my tits off. 787 00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:26,790 It's winter. 788 00:59:26,790 --> 00:59:27,590 Right bye. 789 00:59:40,982 --> 00:59:43,958 [MUSIC PLAYING] 790 00:59:52,886 --> 00:59:55,862 [SOBBING] 791 01:00:08,760 --> 01:00:11,190 So, Louise, how are you getting on? 792 01:00:11,190 --> 01:00:15,640 I know Christmas can be a particularly hard time of year. 793 01:00:15,640 --> 01:00:17,050 I'm OK. 794 01:00:17,050 --> 01:00:19,870 The antidepressants are really helping. 795 01:00:19,870 --> 01:00:22,780 And you're not leaning too much on the drink. 796 01:00:22,780 --> 01:00:26,170 Oh, God, no, that's just like a bit of Christmas cheer. 797 01:00:28,690 --> 01:00:30,010 And how are the kids? 798 01:00:30,010 --> 01:00:31,390 The kids are fine. 799 01:00:31,390 --> 01:00:33,430 The kids are really good. 800 01:00:33,430 --> 01:00:36,070 So last day of school today before the Christmas holidays. 801 01:00:36,070 --> 01:00:39,080 I think they're really excited. 802 01:00:39,080 --> 01:00:41,860 Anywhere from the dads? 803 01:00:41,860 --> 01:00:43,060 Nothing. 804 01:00:43,060 --> 01:00:46,220 Anything to get out of paying child support. 805 01:00:46,220 --> 01:00:49,000 Now two of them have walked out on me. 806 01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:52,300 OK, well, if you need anything, you and the kids 807 01:00:52,300 --> 01:00:53,980 just give me a call, OK? 808 01:00:53,980 --> 01:00:54,850 Thank you. 809 01:01:08,110 --> 01:01:11,210 You are all right, Luke? 810 01:01:11,210 --> 01:01:13,250 I'm fine. 811 01:01:13,250 --> 01:01:14,070 I'm not hungry. 812 01:01:14,070 --> 01:01:16,850 I'm going to go to bed. 813 01:01:16,850 --> 01:01:20,322 Mom, are you going to do anything? 814 01:01:20,322 --> 01:01:22,280 If he's not hungry, what am I supposed to do? 815 01:01:22,280 --> 01:01:24,030 Force feed him like he's on hunger strike? 816 01:01:24,030 --> 01:01:25,700 This isn't a prison. 817 01:01:25,700 --> 01:01:27,650 Prison food would be better though. 818 01:01:27,650 --> 01:01:30,950 This is all we can afford right now. 819 01:01:30,950 --> 01:01:32,390 Since you lost your job. 820 01:01:32,390 --> 01:01:34,760 Yes, Diana, since I lost my job. 821 01:01:34,760 --> 01:01:37,010 Well, I can't wait to find out what Christmas dinner 822 01:01:37,010 --> 01:01:38,660 is going to be like tomorrow. 823 01:01:38,660 --> 01:01:40,820 Some kids were picking on Luke, 824 01:01:40,820 --> 01:01:43,730 and they said that it was his fault that dad left like ours. 825 01:01:43,730 --> 01:01:45,503 But that's ridiculous. 826 01:01:45,503 --> 01:01:47,420 They also said that Krampus is going to come 827 01:01:47,420 --> 01:01:49,130 visit us this Christmas. 828 01:01:49,130 --> 01:01:51,350 Krampus-- you've got to stop listening 829 01:01:51,350 --> 01:01:54,223 to this stupid rubbish, OK? 830 01:01:54,223 --> 01:01:56,015 This house is too depressing for Krampus. 831 01:02:22,277 --> 01:02:24,610 Did any of the neighbors see you creep over the fence? 832 01:02:24,610 --> 01:02:27,070 No, I don't think so. 833 01:02:27,070 --> 01:02:28,480 Did he really live here? 834 01:02:28,480 --> 01:02:29,380 Yeah. 835 01:02:29,380 --> 01:02:31,005 Did the old man who lived here really 836 01:02:31,005 --> 01:02:32,200 tell people he was Krampus? 837 01:02:32,200 --> 01:02:34,300 Yeah, he was like that guy Wayne Gacy 838 01:02:34,300 --> 01:02:35,648 that dressed up as a clown. 839 01:02:35,648 --> 01:02:37,690 Why would any parent want to invite the Krampus 840 01:02:37,690 --> 01:02:38,980 to their kid's party? 841 01:02:38,980 --> 01:02:41,020 To scare them if they've been naughty maybe. 842 01:02:41,020 --> 01:02:42,100 Beats Cole. 843 01:02:42,100 --> 01:02:43,710 When did he die? 844 01:02:43,710 --> 01:02:46,210 They found him hanging dead upstairs from a Christmas tree 845 01:02:46,210 --> 01:02:47,500 last year. 846 01:02:47,500 --> 01:02:49,512 I haven't been able to sell her since. 847 01:02:49,512 --> 01:02:51,220 Apparently, you had a book on pagan magic 848 01:02:51,220 --> 01:02:52,928 and was trying to raise the real Krampus. 849 01:02:57,640 --> 01:03:00,160 [SCREAMS] 850 01:03:01,510 --> 01:03:02,950 That was so funny, Lily. 851 01:03:02,950 --> 01:03:05,710 You guys suck. 852 01:03:05,710 --> 01:03:07,510 I'm going to call my parents on you. 853 01:03:07,510 --> 01:03:08,890 It was only a joke, Lily. 854 01:03:08,890 --> 01:03:10,840 Maybe we were a bit mean, guys. 855 01:03:10,840 --> 01:03:12,460 You're such a sissy, Benjie. 856 01:03:12,460 --> 01:03:13,360 It's hilarious. 857 01:03:18,730 --> 01:03:19,900 Stupid boys. 858 01:03:24,360 --> 01:03:28,835 Really how stupid do you think I am? 859 01:03:28,835 --> 01:03:30,585 Look what I found in one of the drawers. 860 01:03:33,550 --> 01:03:37,120 Maybe that's the poem he used to raise Krampus. 861 01:03:37,120 --> 01:03:38,930 Children, take this into account. 862 01:03:38,930 --> 01:03:40,400 Have you been bad this year? 863 01:03:40,400 --> 01:03:42,250 Tonight's the night that Krampus comes. 864 01:03:42,250 --> 01:03:43,840 Have you something to fear? 865 01:03:43,840 --> 01:03:45,340 If you're a good child, you'll sleep 866 01:03:45,340 --> 01:03:47,050 well for he will pass you by. 867 01:03:47,050 --> 01:03:49,510 But if you are a naughty child, he'll hang you out to dry. 868 01:03:49,510 --> 01:03:51,010 I think we should get out of here. 869 01:03:51,010 --> 01:03:52,210 I think he's right, Craig. 870 01:03:52,210 --> 01:03:53,800 It's just starting to get fun. 871 01:03:53,800 --> 01:03:56,200 You two are such girls like Lily. 872 01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:59,350 Then there comes a type of death that Krampus offers too. 873 01:03:59,350 --> 01:04:02,260 Perhaps a strangulation or a drowning would suit you. 874 01:04:02,260 --> 01:04:05,170 Alternatively, Krampus can just take you straight to hell, 875 01:04:05,170 --> 01:04:08,005 and nothing will be left of you, and nothing left to tell. 876 01:04:11,200 --> 01:04:12,000 What? 877 01:04:16,392 --> 01:04:19,810 [SCREAMS] 878 01:04:19,810 --> 01:04:22,620 What are you doing, Luke? 879 01:04:22,620 --> 01:04:24,900 Watching this video about Krampus online. 880 01:04:24,900 --> 01:04:27,300 Did you know he drowns and eats children 881 01:04:27,300 --> 01:04:30,410 after taking them to hell in a basket on his back? 882 01:04:30,410 --> 01:04:31,440 And don't watch that. 883 01:04:31,440 --> 01:04:32,730 Come on, go to bed. 884 01:04:32,730 --> 01:04:34,020 We've been good this year. 885 01:04:34,020 --> 01:04:36,660 Santa is coming, not Krampus. 886 01:04:36,660 --> 01:04:37,890 Then why did dad leave? 887 01:04:48,170 --> 01:04:49,860 When are you going to give it up. 888 01:04:49,860 --> 01:04:53,456 I'm really not falling for it this time. 889 01:04:53,456 --> 01:04:58,550 [SCREAMS] 890 01:04:58,550 --> 01:04:59,960 Come on, Jonathan. 891 01:04:59,960 --> 01:05:02,630 Come back to bed. 892 01:05:02,630 --> 01:05:05,280 It's Christmas Eve. 893 01:05:05,280 --> 01:05:06,315 I want cheering up. 894 01:05:10,180 --> 01:05:13,530 This doesn't feel right. 895 01:05:13,530 --> 01:05:16,380 I should be with my kids. 896 01:05:16,380 --> 01:05:18,650 Only one of them yours. 897 01:05:18,650 --> 01:05:22,873 Odell get over it is just one Christmas. 898 01:05:22,873 --> 01:05:25,540 Things will get better next year when she gets pregnant with yet 899 01:05:25,540 --> 01:05:26,890 another bloke. 900 01:05:26,890 --> 01:05:29,020 I need some air. 901 01:05:29,020 --> 01:05:31,083 Don't take too long. 902 01:05:31,083 --> 01:05:33,250 You're really starting to bring this Christmas down. 903 01:05:43,848 --> 01:05:46,410 No, daddy. 904 01:05:46,410 --> 01:05:51,990 Daddy, daddy not tonight. 905 01:05:51,990 --> 01:05:52,920 It's Christmas. 906 01:06:00,708 --> 01:06:01,508 No. 907 01:06:10,560 --> 01:06:11,700 Oh, God's sake. 908 01:06:15,050 --> 01:06:16,870 Oh, hi, Denise. 909 01:06:16,870 --> 01:06:20,140 It's Louise. 910 01:06:20,140 --> 01:06:24,820 I don't know if you could possibly pop by. 911 01:06:24,820 --> 01:06:27,610 I'm just not really feeling myself. 912 01:06:27,610 --> 01:06:30,365 I don't know if it's the medication or-- 913 01:06:30,365 --> 01:06:31,990 I've just been having some weird dreams 914 01:06:31,990 --> 01:06:35,740 and the kids have been saying some weird stuff, 915 01:06:35,740 --> 01:06:40,660 but yeah, give me a call back or maybe pop by. 916 01:06:40,660 --> 01:06:41,740 Thanks. 917 01:06:41,740 --> 01:06:42,540 Bye. 918 01:07:04,745 --> 01:07:05,545 Hey, Louise. 919 01:07:07,983 --> 01:07:09,650 I know that I'm the last person that you 920 01:07:09,650 --> 01:07:10,910 want to hear from right now. 921 01:07:13,520 --> 01:07:16,831 I really want to come round tomorrow and see the kids. 922 01:07:16,831 --> 01:07:19,320 You have to understand that this is killing me too. 923 01:07:23,270 --> 01:07:25,220 Don't think there's any more guilt after this. 924 01:07:29,430 --> 01:07:32,400 Please, just pick up. 925 01:07:32,400 --> 01:07:33,200 Louise. 926 01:07:36,210 --> 01:07:37,010 Louise. 927 01:07:42,035 --> 01:07:42,835 Louise. 928 01:07:56,030 --> 01:07:57,410 Fuck it. 929 01:07:57,410 --> 01:07:59,060 Come around whether you like it or not. 930 01:08:05,260 --> 01:08:07,330 I'll get more like a fucking Krampus tonight. 931 01:08:14,390 --> 01:08:16,729 Oh, what's this? 932 01:08:16,729 --> 01:08:19,910 A naughty little note, Jonathan. 933 01:08:19,910 --> 01:08:21,215 I hope it's not dirty. 934 01:09:30,850 --> 01:09:32,830 You're frighten the other children. 935 01:09:32,830 --> 01:09:35,050 Mom, I heard noises. 936 01:09:35,050 --> 01:09:35,995 Are the rats back? 937 01:09:39,160 --> 01:09:41,770 Are the rats back? 938 01:09:41,770 --> 01:09:44,725 I've never been so insulted in my life. 939 01:09:56,910 --> 01:10:01,245 Andrew, is that you playing with my robot toy? 940 01:10:31,410 --> 01:10:33,030 You made him leave. 941 01:10:35,610 --> 01:10:38,040 You ruined Christmas. 942 01:10:45,510 --> 01:10:49,140 Krampus is here, Luke. 943 01:10:49,140 --> 01:10:50,600 It's time to play. 944 01:10:57,960 --> 01:11:05,380 [LAUGHTER] 945 01:11:05,380 --> 01:11:06,520 Louise, it's Denise. 946 01:11:06,520 --> 01:11:09,040 Your door was open. 947 01:11:09,040 --> 01:11:09,880 I got your message. 948 01:11:13,090 --> 01:11:17,790 Louise, what have you done? 949 01:11:17,790 --> 01:11:19,810 He says their father he's gone insane. 950 01:11:19,810 --> 01:11:22,090 He's killed the kids. 951 01:11:22,090 --> 01:11:27,490 He's telling the house, you need to get help. 952 01:11:27,490 --> 01:11:28,480 Oh, God. 953 01:11:28,480 --> 01:11:29,920 OK, OK, don't-- 954 01:11:29,920 --> 01:11:31,130 don't worry. 955 01:11:31,130 --> 01:11:31,930 Oh, God. 956 01:11:35,400 --> 01:11:36,200 Oh, God. 957 01:12:07,010 --> 01:12:08,510 You know what, I'm leaving. 958 01:12:08,510 --> 01:12:10,302 There's something not quite right with you. 959 01:12:10,302 --> 01:12:11,360 You need-- you need help. 960 01:12:11,360 --> 01:12:13,280 You're not taking them away from me. 961 01:12:16,340 --> 01:12:21,890 Krampus days are here again, your kids will die, 962 01:12:21,890 --> 01:12:24,530 and the sky falling. 963 01:12:24,530 --> 01:12:25,710 Diana, Andrew. 964 01:12:25,710 --> 01:12:26,960 What have you done to them? 965 01:12:26,960 --> 01:12:28,880 They're just sleeping. 966 01:12:28,880 --> 01:12:30,290 I gave them some Rohypnol. 967 01:12:30,290 --> 01:12:31,850 You've drugged our children. 968 01:12:31,850 --> 01:12:33,090 What's the matter with you? 969 01:12:33,090 --> 01:12:33,890 I'm down. 970 01:12:33,890 --> 01:12:36,080 Just because you got daddy-son's issues doesn't-- 971 01:12:46,590 --> 01:12:51,287 He'll make you all disappear, just like the others. 972 01:12:51,287 --> 01:13:07,700 [SCREAMS] 973 01:13:07,700 --> 01:13:12,540 Well, there goes another one. 974 01:13:12,540 --> 01:13:14,970 You know, none of your relationships 975 01:13:14,970 --> 01:13:16,890 are going to work out if you insist 976 01:13:16,890 --> 01:13:20,730 on stabbing them all to death. 977 01:13:20,730 --> 01:13:22,920 I think he was right. 978 01:13:22,920 --> 01:13:25,440 Maybe you should have accepted that invitation 979 01:13:25,440 --> 01:13:29,190 for relationship guidance counseling. 980 01:13:29,190 --> 01:13:32,880 Oh, daddy's going to go and lie down. 981 01:13:32,880 --> 01:13:34,650 I can feel a cramp coming up. 982 01:13:56,840 --> 01:14:00,170 Look at our little darlings. 983 01:14:00,170 --> 01:14:04,910 Peaceful and ready for Christmas Day. 984 01:14:04,910 --> 01:14:07,850 [LAUGHTER] 985 01:14:09,820 --> 01:14:12,650 I'm going back to hell now. 986 01:14:12,650 --> 01:14:16,924 I'll see you next Christmas. 987 01:14:16,924 --> 01:14:29,990 (SINGING) Silent night, Holy night, all is calm, 988 01:14:29,990 --> 01:14:40,920 all is bright, sleep in heavenly peace. 989 01:14:44,540 --> 01:14:47,710 I dare, more sick and senseless 990 01:14:47,710 --> 01:14:51,260 this year than ever before. 991 01:14:51,260 --> 01:14:52,340 Cramping my style. 992 01:14:55,820 --> 01:14:59,690 I love it when the pretty ones die so horribly, don't you? 993 01:15:10,320 --> 01:15:11,550 It wasn't me. 994 01:15:11,550 --> 01:15:13,040 Krampus did it. 995 01:15:13,040 --> 01:15:14,415 That's what they all say, love. 996 01:15:17,190 --> 01:15:20,700 So have we got anything come through on it yet? 997 01:15:20,700 --> 01:15:22,080 Yes, inspector. 998 01:15:22,080 --> 01:15:25,770 She was abused by her father, she was being monitored 999 01:15:25,770 --> 01:15:27,330 after her other half left because she 1000 01:15:27,330 --> 01:15:30,270 was having a nervous breakdown, and you never guess what-- 1001 01:15:30,270 --> 01:15:31,230 What? 1002 01:15:31,230 --> 01:15:34,670 The father was only a bloody sicko Santa person hater. 1003 01:15:34,670 --> 01:15:36,840 Oh, great. 1004 01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:41,620 I can see this is going to be one of those Christmases. 1005 01:15:41,620 --> 01:15:44,780 Right, I'll leave you to clear the mess up here, 1006 01:15:44,780 --> 01:15:48,760 so at least I can try and get back to my own kids, that's 1007 01:15:48,760 --> 01:15:50,920 assuming the missus hasn't already cut them up 1008 01:15:50,920 --> 01:15:51,962 and put them in the oven. 1009 01:15:58,360 --> 01:16:00,417 Oh, Denise, what are you doing here? 1010 01:16:00,417 --> 01:16:02,500 She's only going to get herself bloody murdered, 1011 01:16:02,500 --> 01:16:03,300 isn't she? 1012 01:16:03,300 --> 01:16:04,270 You are? 1013 01:16:04,270 --> 01:16:05,800 Sliced up like bacon. 1014 01:16:05,800 --> 01:16:07,540 But I like Denise. 1015 01:16:07,540 --> 01:16:09,310 I like bacon. 1016 01:16:09,310 --> 01:16:10,930 I like bacon. 1017 01:16:10,930 --> 01:16:13,040 Check up with a frying pan on. 1018 01:16:13,040 --> 01:16:13,840 Why not? 1019 01:16:13,840 --> 01:16:14,990 Red or brown sauce? 1020 01:16:14,990 --> 01:16:15,790 Brown. 1021 01:16:15,790 --> 01:16:16,590 Perfect. 1022 01:16:23,530 --> 01:16:26,620 So it wasn't Krampus, it was the mom. 1023 01:16:26,620 --> 01:16:31,530 Yeah, she was North Polar. 1024 01:16:31,530 --> 01:16:34,030 There are freaks out there who actually think they're Santa, 1025 01:16:34,030 --> 01:16:36,110 you know. 1026 01:16:36,110 --> 01:16:38,820 I know, shocking, isn't it? 1027 01:16:38,820 --> 01:16:41,670 If Krampus doesn't get you, your mother probably will. 1028 01:16:41,670 --> 01:16:44,610 God only knows what's worse. 1029 01:16:44,610 --> 01:16:47,340 What happened to the mom? 1030 01:16:47,340 --> 01:16:50,415 She joined those other three in the nutters wing. 1031 01:16:55,440 --> 01:16:57,510 Do you like Christmas carols, Peter? 1032 01:16:57,510 --> 01:17:00,500 I don't know that many. 1033 01:17:00,500 --> 01:17:02,610 Just as well. 1034 01:17:02,610 --> 01:17:05,280 Most of them are quite boring. 1035 01:17:05,280 --> 01:17:08,950 I know a few that are rather good. 1036 01:17:08,950 --> 01:17:16,260 I know one choir who had a very haunting song. 1037 01:17:16,260 --> 01:17:25,370 This here's a story I like to call The 12 Kills of Christmas. 1038 01:17:25,370 --> 01:17:26,510 Don't you mean 12-- 1039 01:17:26,510 --> 01:17:29,100 12 Days of Christmas? 1040 01:17:29,100 --> 01:17:29,900 Oh, no. 1041 01:17:34,850 --> 01:17:39,650 Singers that came to this house never sang that song. 1042 01:17:45,800 --> 01:17:48,470 To be the guardian of your incarnate son, 1043 01:17:48,470 --> 01:17:53,120 and husband of the Blessed Virgin Mary. 1044 01:17:53,120 --> 01:17:56,840 Give us grace to follow him. 1045 01:17:56,840 --> 01:17:58,740 Nearly ready for midnight mass, father. 1046 01:17:58,740 --> 01:17:59,540 Why? 1047 01:17:59,540 --> 01:18:00,680 Don't I sound very good? 1048 01:18:00,680 --> 01:18:02,513 Oh, no, no, you sound great. 1049 01:18:02,513 --> 01:18:04,055 Anyone would think you were a priest. 1050 01:18:06,860 --> 01:18:07,910 Thank you, Cathy. 1051 01:18:07,910 --> 01:18:09,618 I'm just going to clear out the office. 1052 01:18:12,870 --> 01:18:13,670 And faithful. 1053 01:18:19,300 --> 01:18:22,680 Can I help you young man? 1054 01:18:22,680 --> 01:18:25,950 I'm just looking around. 1055 01:18:25,950 --> 01:18:28,050 Does Father McShane still work here? 1056 01:18:28,050 --> 01:18:32,640 No, he had to retire suddenly due to his health. 1057 01:18:32,640 --> 01:18:35,820 Is he still practicing the faith? 1058 01:18:35,820 --> 01:18:38,940 It's a complicated matter. 1059 01:18:38,940 --> 01:18:41,370 You know it's good practice when in the Lord's house 1060 01:18:41,370 --> 01:18:44,130 to take your hood down. 1061 01:18:44,130 --> 01:18:46,020 Sorry. 1062 01:18:46,020 --> 01:18:48,720 It's been a long time since I was here. 1063 01:18:48,720 --> 01:18:51,210 We're in a church. 1064 01:18:51,210 --> 01:18:52,470 You used to come here? 1065 01:18:52,470 --> 01:18:55,740 When I was younger, I used to be in the choir. 1066 01:18:55,740 --> 01:18:57,390 Oh, I see. 1067 01:18:57,390 --> 01:19:00,165 I heard Father McShane's choirs were the best for miles around. 1068 01:19:02,597 --> 01:19:03,930 I was friends with Dylan Gray. 1069 01:19:12,380 --> 01:19:16,450 Well, how can I help, uh-- 1070 01:19:16,450 --> 01:19:17,400 Leo. 1071 01:19:17,400 --> 01:19:19,250 Leo Edwards. 1072 01:19:19,250 --> 01:19:20,600 How can I help, Leo? 1073 01:19:20,600 --> 01:19:23,760 Well, I was hoping I could talk to Father McShane. 1074 01:19:23,760 --> 01:19:26,880 I'm sorry, he's suffering from dementia. 1075 01:19:26,880 --> 01:19:30,060 He wouldn't even remember you. 1076 01:19:30,060 --> 01:19:30,860 That's a shame. 1077 01:19:35,030 --> 01:19:37,800 Is there anything I can help with? 1078 01:19:37,800 --> 01:19:40,070 No, not really. 1079 01:19:40,070 --> 01:19:42,020 Nothing you or God can do for me. 1080 01:19:59,680 --> 01:20:03,730 Cathy did you leave this box here? 1081 01:20:06,870 --> 01:20:07,830 No. 1082 01:20:07,830 --> 01:20:11,600 Might be one of the lads from this morning left it here. 1083 01:20:11,600 --> 01:20:13,940 Hang on. 1084 01:20:13,940 --> 01:20:16,130 I know that box. 1085 01:20:16,130 --> 01:20:18,830 This used to belong to Father McShane where did you find it? 1086 01:20:18,830 --> 01:20:21,930 It was just left there. 1087 01:20:21,930 --> 01:20:23,440 Oh. 1088 01:20:23,440 --> 01:20:26,050 Do you know anything about Dylan Gray. 1089 01:20:26,050 --> 01:20:27,700 Dylan Gray, yes. 1090 01:20:27,700 --> 01:20:31,480 He was in terrible trouble that boy with drugs and stealing. 1091 01:20:31,480 --> 01:20:33,340 Father McShane tried to help him, 1092 01:20:33,340 --> 01:20:38,200 but he was honored by the devil that boy, yeah. 1093 01:20:38,200 --> 01:20:43,330 Between you and me, I think he ran away and killed himself. 1094 01:20:43,330 --> 01:20:45,940 Yeah, it broke Father McShane's heart. 1095 01:20:45,940 --> 01:20:48,340 He really messed him up. 1096 01:20:48,340 --> 01:20:51,550 Anyway, I best go replace all the short candlesticks. 1097 01:21:05,410 --> 01:21:06,960 Hello, Maria McShane. 1098 01:21:06,960 --> 01:21:07,760 Hi, Maria. 1099 01:21:07,760 --> 01:21:10,475 It's Father Abel How's your father? 1100 01:21:12,980 --> 01:21:14,045 Yeah, he's OK. 1101 01:21:19,533 --> 01:21:20,950 It's largely the same, but I think 1102 01:21:20,950 --> 01:21:24,620 it's going to take a Christmas miracle for any change. 1103 01:21:24,620 --> 01:21:27,770 I haven't seen you coming around to church much of late. 1104 01:21:27,770 --> 01:21:28,600 I know. 1105 01:21:28,600 --> 01:21:32,230 It's just what-- with everything and father. 1106 01:21:32,230 --> 01:21:34,690 Oh, no I understand. 1107 01:21:34,690 --> 01:21:37,530 If you ever need anyone to talk to-- 1108 01:21:37,530 --> 01:21:38,330 Thank you. 1109 01:21:38,330 --> 01:21:41,770 That's very kind of but I think I've 1110 01:21:41,770 --> 01:21:44,080 lost my faith a little bit. 1111 01:21:44,080 --> 01:21:48,250 Well, if you can't talk to God, please talk to me. 1112 01:21:51,040 --> 01:21:54,730 Look, I've rung up because I found this old music box I was 1113 01:21:54,730 --> 01:21:57,880 told belonged to your father. 1114 01:21:57,880 --> 01:21:58,960 Music box. 1115 01:21:58,960 --> 01:22:01,150 Yes, so I wondered if you might like it back. 1116 01:22:09,870 --> 01:22:10,670 It's got a tune. 1117 01:22:10,670 --> 01:22:12,350 All things bright and beautiful. 1118 01:22:14,870 --> 01:22:16,730 No, that's fine. 1119 01:22:16,730 --> 01:22:18,290 Please just get rid of it or give it 1120 01:22:18,290 --> 01:22:20,000 to a charity shop or something. 1121 01:22:42,150 --> 01:22:45,090 Here we are farther. 1122 01:22:45,090 --> 01:22:47,400 Back here another year. 1123 01:22:47,400 --> 01:22:48,570 Why did she do? 1124 01:22:48,570 --> 01:22:49,800 Why did she leave? 1125 01:22:49,800 --> 01:22:51,390 Because the devil got into her. 1126 01:22:51,390 --> 01:22:53,760 It wasn't her fault. The devil makes 1127 01:22:53,760 --> 01:22:55,747 us all do bad things at times. 1128 01:22:55,747 --> 01:22:57,330 Did the devil get her from that box? 1129 01:22:57,330 --> 01:22:59,820 Yes, he did, and that's why you must never tell anyone 1130 01:22:59,820 --> 01:23:03,030 about it or open it because if the devil's friends get to find 1131 01:23:03,030 --> 01:23:05,400 out about the box, they'll release 1132 01:23:05,400 --> 01:23:08,250 the devil for you and for me and for everyone, 1133 01:23:08,250 --> 01:23:10,110 and then we'll all disappear. 1134 01:23:10,110 --> 01:23:12,510 Like that boy he was never there that night, Murray. 1135 01:23:12,510 --> 01:23:13,920 What'd I tell you. 1136 01:23:13,920 --> 01:23:14,920 He was a ghost. 1137 01:23:14,920 --> 01:23:17,280 And all must find out the church is haunted otherwise, 1138 01:23:17,280 --> 01:23:19,230 everyone would be too afraid to come here, 1139 01:23:19,230 --> 01:23:21,720 and that will make God sad. 1140 01:23:21,720 --> 01:23:23,550 That's right, my darling. 1141 01:23:26,820 --> 01:23:28,800 The church's ghost must always stay out 1142 01:23:28,800 --> 01:23:33,786 of sight, like the bodies in these graves. 1143 01:23:33,786 --> 01:23:36,774 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1144 01:24:18,110 --> 01:24:19,950 Come on. 1145 01:24:19,950 --> 01:24:20,750 That's it. 1146 01:24:26,230 --> 01:24:27,030 Try and relax. 1147 01:24:30,280 --> 01:24:31,800 I'll see you in the morning. 1148 01:24:31,800 --> 01:24:33,120 Won't you stop saying it? 1149 01:24:45,820 --> 01:24:48,250 I visited Mother's grave today with Father. 1150 01:24:48,250 --> 01:24:50,135 It must have been freezing up there. 1151 01:24:50,135 --> 01:24:50,935 It was. 1152 01:24:53,530 --> 01:24:56,680 Not as cold as the year my mother passed away there. 1153 01:24:56,680 --> 01:24:58,000 My last white Christmas. 1154 01:25:02,555 --> 01:25:03,355 Are you OK? 1155 01:25:05,780 --> 01:25:06,580 Yeah. 1156 01:25:10,450 --> 01:25:11,620 You don't look OK. 1157 01:25:15,400 --> 01:25:19,020 Maria, what's up. 1158 01:25:19,020 --> 01:25:20,756 Nothing. 1159 01:25:20,756 --> 01:25:21,742 Come here. 1160 01:25:28,650 --> 01:25:30,540 It's nearly our two-year anniversary. 1161 01:25:37,125 --> 01:25:38,500 I'm just not sure about leaving 1162 01:25:38,500 --> 01:25:40,820 father here for Christmas Eve. 1163 01:25:40,820 --> 01:25:44,690 Maria, you do too much for him. 1164 01:25:44,690 --> 01:25:49,450 The nurse can look after him tomorrow for one night. 1165 01:25:49,450 --> 01:25:54,380 Besides, he probably doesn't even know who you are anymore. 1166 01:25:54,380 --> 01:25:55,290 I'm sorry. 1167 01:25:55,290 --> 01:25:56,920 Sorry about that. 1168 01:25:56,920 --> 01:25:59,890 That was harsh. 1169 01:25:59,890 --> 01:26:02,420 No, it's OK. 1170 01:26:05,190 --> 01:26:09,070 Sorry, it's just been a really weird day. 1171 01:26:09,070 --> 01:26:10,678 I've had a lot of news. 1172 01:26:10,678 --> 01:26:11,970 Anything I should know about? 1173 01:26:21,020 --> 01:26:21,820 Really? 1174 01:26:25,790 --> 01:26:28,305 Oh, my God. 1175 01:26:28,305 --> 01:26:29,105 That's amazing. 1176 01:26:32,200 --> 01:26:35,050 Well, what is it? 1177 01:26:35,050 --> 01:26:37,690 Babe, you're not happy about it. 1178 01:26:37,690 --> 01:26:39,980 No, I am. 1179 01:26:39,980 --> 01:26:40,780 I am. 1180 01:26:40,780 --> 01:26:43,960 It's just we're having our own child, 1181 01:26:43,960 --> 01:26:47,420 I think I have to tell you something. 1182 01:26:47,420 --> 01:26:49,490 What? 1183 01:26:49,490 --> 01:26:51,910 Yeah, you can tell me anything. 1184 01:26:51,910 --> 01:26:57,190 Well, before my mother killed herself that Christmas, 1185 01:26:57,190 --> 01:26:59,890 I heard her and father fighting. 1186 01:26:59,890 --> 01:27:04,270 Apparently, she found something in a music box he had. 1187 01:27:04,270 --> 01:27:06,130 A music box? 1188 01:27:06,130 --> 01:27:08,440 Yeah. 1189 01:27:08,440 --> 01:27:09,710 I don't know what it was. 1190 01:27:09,710 --> 01:27:15,292 All I know is-- is that he had a fight with a student. 1191 01:27:15,292 --> 01:27:17,500 Do you think anyone's going to believe you over me, 1192 01:27:17,500 --> 01:27:19,540 a man of God over some drugged up 1193 01:27:19,540 --> 01:27:21,610 little junkie from the streets? 1194 01:27:21,610 --> 01:27:24,790 His name was Dylan. 1195 01:27:24,790 --> 01:27:26,800 Dad said that he came back a drug addict 1196 01:27:26,800 --> 01:27:28,403 and tried to blackmail him, but-- 1197 01:27:28,403 --> 01:27:30,820 You think he might have been involved with his students? 1198 01:27:30,820 --> 01:27:33,490 I don't know. 1199 01:27:33,490 --> 01:27:35,770 I mean, it's-- it's a terrible thing to think about, 1200 01:27:35,770 --> 01:27:41,050 but this rumor is from his old church saying that he was 1201 01:27:41,050 --> 01:27:43,480 charged with something, but charges were 1202 01:27:43,480 --> 01:27:46,330 dropped because he's senile. 1203 01:27:46,330 --> 01:27:47,530 Jesus Christ. 1204 01:27:51,910 --> 01:27:53,140 But it's just a rumor. 1205 01:27:55,930 --> 01:27:58,990 Your dad wouldn't do that, right? 1206 01:28:07,150 --> 01:28:11,710 (VOICEOVER) All things bright and beautiful, 1207 01:28:11,710 --> 01:28:19,522 all creatures great and small, all things wise and wonderful 1208 01:28:19,522 --> 01:28:25,788 [CRYING] 1209 01:28:25,788 --> 01:28:26,680 I'll go. 1210 01:28:26,680 --> 01:28:27,480 No, Maria-- 1211 01:28:27,480 --> 01:28:30,270 No, you stay. 1212 01:28:30,270 --> 01:28:33,030 Maria, wait. 1213 01:28:33,030 --> 01:28:36,500 I think it's time you start getting some extra help for him 1214 01:28:36,500 --> 01:28:39,660 after Christmas. 1215 01:28:39,660 --> 01:28:40,470 Seriously. 1216 01:28:46,710 --> 01:28:48,180 Oh, come on, father. 1217 01:28:48,180 --> 01:28:50,260 What are you doing down there. 1218 01:28:50,260 --> 01:28:52,260 You know you can't walk. 1219 01:28:52,260 --> 01:28:55,680 They come for me in the dark. 1220 01:28:55,680 --> 01:28:58,230 They plead with Jesus. 1221 01:28:58,230 --> 01:29:01,521 Nobody's here. 1222 01:29:01,521 --> 01:29:06,330 It was just a nightmare, OK? 1223 01:29:06,330 --> 01:29:10,875 May God mercy on our souls. 1224 01:29:22,760 --> 01:29:27,265 Maria, now what have I told you about playing in the basement. 1225 01:29:27,265 --> 01:29:29,140 Not to come down here as it's full of ghosts. 1226 01:29:29,140 --> 01:29:30,700 Exactly. 1227 01:29:30,700 --> 01:29:32,830 Wouldn't the ghosts be in the graveyard? 1228 01:29:32,830 --> 01:29:35,830 Not all souls are asleep out there. 1229 01:29:35,830 --> 01:29:37,630 What's that? - It's Saint Christopher. 1230 01:29:37,630 --> 01:29:39,255 I think it belonged to that Dillon boy. 1231 01:29:39,255 --> 01:29:40,330 Give it to me. 1232 01:29:40,330 --> 01:29:42,400 I'll pass it on to the police. 1233 01:29:42,400 --> 01:29:44,890 Now go on upstairs and carry on cleaning up the silver. 1234 01:29:44,890 --> 01:29:45,690 Sorry, Father. 1235 01:30:00,990 --> 01:30:02,880 Kurt, what are you doing? 1236 01:30:02,880 --> 01:30:04,930 Look what I found. 1237 01:30:04,930 --> 01:30:08,890 Come on, it's the best time of the year. 1238 01:30:08,890 --> 01:30:15,100 And you and me can have a little baby. 1239 01:30:15,100 --> 01:30:17,740 What could spoil this Christmas? 1240 01:31:40,408 --> 01:31:43,183 [GASPING] 1241 01:32:03,910 --> 01:32:07,110 I'm just off now, Father. 1242 01:32:07,110 --> 01:32:24,965 OK Kathy I'll see you tomorrow Cathy. 1243 01:32:36,960 --> 01:32:39,630 Hello. 1244 01:32:39,630 --> 01:32:42,620 Who's there? 1245 01:32:42,620 --> 01:32:43,610 I'll call the police. 1246 01:32:51,190 --> 01:32:52,210 Who the fuck are you? 1247 01:32:54,720 --> 01:33:11,850 [GROANING] 1248 01:33:11,850 --> 01:33:12,788 So he's been fed. 1249 01:33:12,788 --> 01:33:14,580 He just needs to be helped to bed at night. 1250 01:33:14,580 --> 01:33:15,890 OK, no worries-- 1251 01:33:15,890 --> 01:33:18,130 Don't let them stop singing. 1252 01:33:18,130 --> 01:33:19,990 Just ignore that, it's the only thing he 1253 01:33:19,990 --> 01:33:22,740 says since he's had the stroke. 1254 01:33:22,740 --> 01:33:23,850 Of course. 1255 01:33:23,850 --> 01:33:26,287 Now you guys have a lovely Christmas Eve. 1256 01:33:26,287 --> 01:33:28,620 We're going to have a great time, aren't you Mr McShane? 1257 01:33:28,620 --> 01:33:30,450 Come on we're going to be late. - OK. 1258 01:33:30,450 --> 01:33:31,710 Thank you. - Bye. 1259 01:33:31,710 --> 01:33:32,730 Thank you. Bye. 1260 01:33:44,360 --> 01:33:47,260 Now you're going to be a good boy, aren't you, Mr. McShane? 1261 01:33:47,260 --> 01:33:49,010 I don't want no shitting on Christmas Eve, 1262 01:33:49,010 --> 01:33:49,840 do you understand? 1263 01:33:49,840 --> 01:33:51,230 Don't let them don't stop singing. 1264 01:33:51,230 --> 01:33:52,100 Yeah, yeah. 1265 01:33:52,100 --> 01:33:53,900 That's all you say I know. 1266 01:33:53,900 --> 01:33:56,382 The choir's grown up now, they're all gone. 1267 01:33:56,382 --> 01:33:58,410 [KNOCKING] 1268 01:33:58,410 --> 01:33:59,210 Go-- away. 1269 01:33:59,210 --> 01:34:01,560 (SINGING) Jingle bell, jingle-- 1270 01:34:01,560 --> 01:34:02,670 I said go away. 1271 01:34:02,670 --> 01:34:07,040 What part of I don't like Christmas don't you understand? 1272 01:34:07,040 --> 01:34:07,840 That did it. 1273 01:34:11,820 --> 01:34:13,692 Hey, They've gone. 1274 01:34:13,692 --> 01:34:15,150 Mike can you hurry up and get here. 1275 01:34:15,150 --> 01:34:17,775 I don't want to spend Christmas alone with this creepy old guy. 1276 01:35:03,765 --> 01:35:05,080 Are you in this? 1277 01:35:12,505 --> 01:35:14,320 If they finally come back and check on him? 1278 01:35:14,320 --> 01:35:15,580 They won't. 1279 01:35:15,580 --> 01:35:17,560 Look, the daughters probably asked 1280 01:35:17,560 --> 01:35:21,140 Santa to kill him off just so she can inherit the house. 1281 01:35:21,140 --> 01:35:23,170 I just-- I can't do this with Father Teddy. 1282 01:35:23,170 --> 01:35:24,712 Can we wheel him into the other room? 1283 01:35:28,060 --> 01:35:30,250 See no evil. 1284 01:35:30,250 --> 01:35:31,840 Happy now? 1285 01:35:31,840 --> 01:35:33,560 It's like a demented budgie. 1286 01:35:33,560 --> 01:35:34,810 Don't let them stop singing. 1287 01:35:34,810 --> 01:35:35,680 Shut up. 1288 01:35:47,878 --> 01:35:50,840 [KNOCKING] 1289 01:35:50,840 --> 01:35:51,650 Oh, oh-- 1290 01:35:51,650 --> 01:35:52,450 Really? 1291 01:35:52,450 --> 01:35:57,370 (SINGING) 10 beautiful, Oh creatures-- 1292 01:35:57,370 --> 01:35:58,220 OK. 1293 01:35:58,220 --> 01:36:00,290 No, just leave him. 1294 01:36:00,290 --> 01:36:03,620 I can't do this with songs of praise on coming. 1295 01:36:03,620 --> 01:36:08,832 Oh, tell them to sing come we faithful or something. 1296 01:36:08,832 --> 01:36:10,040 Will be back in one minute. 1297 01:36:21,520 --> 01:36:23,905 Tell your God to stop screwing with my night, OK? 1298 01:36:33,110 --> 01:36:36,080 There was no one there, so. 1299 01:36:45,080 --> 01:36:47,870 Your cries back, father. 1300 01:36:47,870 --> 01:36:49,490 Time for one last hymn. 1301 01:36:59,040 --> 01:37:00,900 What's wrong? 1302 01:37:00,900 --> 01:37:02,250 It's my dad. 1303 01:37:02,250 --> 01:37:04,440 He's come around. 1304 01:37:04,440 --> 01:37:07,680 What do you mean he's come around? 1305 01:37:07,680 --> 01:37:11,730 Apparently, he's awake and wants to make a confession. 1306 01:37:11,730 --> 01:37:12,960 What type of confession? 1307 01:37:16,090 --> 01:37:18,670 Please, this is nothing to do with me, OK? 1308 01:37:18,670 --> 01:37:20,050 The daughter is on the way. 1309 01:37:20,050 --> 01:37:21,370 I'm innocent, please. 1310 01:37:21,370 --> 01:37:22,450 I haven't done anything. 1311 01:37:27,770 --> 01:37:31,200 What should we do about it? 1312 01:37:31,200 --> 01:37:34,616 [SCREAMS] 1313 01:37:48,770 --> 01:37:50,895 Father. 1314 01:37:50,895 --> 01:37:51,695 Father. 1315 01:37:58,490 --> 01:37:59,990 Where is he? 1316 01:37:59,990 --> 01:38:01,640 I don't know. 1317 01:38:01,640 --> 01:38:03,725 Where's the damn nurse? 1318 01:38:03,725 --> 01:38:04,525 My God. 1319 01:38:22,220 --> 01:38:25,196 [SCREAMS] 1320 01:38:53,260 --> 01:38:54,760 We found this in the graveyard. 1321 01:39:16,550 --> 01:39:19,100 Who are you? 1322 01:39:19,100 --> 01:39:21,758 You know who we are. 1323 01:39:21,758 --> 01:39:23,165 We are fallen angels. 1324 01:39:29,300 --> 01:39:32,330 I don't know what you mean. 1325 01:39:32,330 --> 01:39:34,550 Is that what you told your boyfriend? 1326 01:39:37,590 --> 01:39:40,605 The time has come for you to look upon our faces. 1327 01:39:47,320 --> 01:39:49,960 This is one of the ropes he used to wear, 1328 01:39:49,960 --> 01:39:52,510 well, before taking it off. 1329 01:39:52,510 --> 01:39:56,180 He dead rode Father McShane. 1330 01:39:56,180 --> 01:39:59,510 Don't let them stop singing. 1331 01:39:59,510 --> 01:40:04,140 We should kill her now, then we can get on with daddy. 1332 01:40:04,140 --> 01:40:05,270 He's never-- 1333 01:40:05,270 --> 01:40:06,410 Shush. 1334 01:40:06,410 --> 01:40:08,540 You're just one more lie to cover up 1335 01:40:08,540 --> 01:40:12,060 for his crimes like the songs. 1336 01:40:12,060 --> 01:40:15,770 Didn't-- I didn't know. 1337 01:40:15,770 --> 01:40:18,350 Christian saw what happened that night in the church 1338 01:40:18,350 --> 01:40:20,690 after choir practice. 1339 01:40:20,690 --> 01:40:22,250 He was late to leave. 1340 01:40:22,250 --> 01:40:24,830 He saw you see it all. 1341 01:40:24,830 --> 01:40:27,050 Things on my mind of you. 1342 01:40:27,050 --> 01:40:31,550 I am a man of God, and he speaks through me. 1343 01:40:31,550 --> 01:40:33,980 You must never mention what happened here tonight. 1344 01:40:33,980 --> 01:40:35,630 That boy had the devil in him. 1345 01:40:35,630 --> 01:40:38,480 Your father did what he had to do. 1346 01:40:38,480 --> 01:40:41,390 Maybe the devil is gone now when you hit him with that cross. 1347 01:40:41,390 --> 01:40:43,100 Maybe you knocked the devil out of him. 1348 01:40:43,100 --> 01:40:45,575 I don't think we can take that risk. 1349 01:40:45,575 --> 01:40:46,700 What are you going to do? 1350 01:40:46,700 --> 01:40:48,350 Nothing you need worry about. 1351 01:40:48,350 --> 01:40:51,050 Now go up to the altar, put your hands over your ears 1352 01:40:51,050 --> 01:40:53,180 and pray as hard as you can. 1353 01:40:53,180 --> 01:40:55,055 Your father has a late night song to prepare. 1354 01:40:58,950 --> 01:41:00,945 How your father told you to say nothing. 1355 01:41:11,240 --> 01:41:13,070 Father is dealing with the devil. 1356 01:41:13,070 --> 01:41:14,900 Father is dealing with the devil. 1357 01:41:14,900 --> 01:41:17,750 Father is dealing with the devil. 1358 01:41:17,750 --> 01:41:19,970 Father is dealing with the devil. 1359 01:41:19,970 --> 01:41:22,160 Father is dealing with the devil. 1360 01:41:22,160 --> 01:41:24,650 Father is dealing with the devil. 1361 01:41:24,650 --> 01:41:27,380 Father is dealing with the devil. 1362 01:41:27,380 --> 01:41:29,090 Father is dealing with the devil. 1363 01:41:29,090 --> 01:41:31,220 Father is dealing with the devil. 1364 01:41:31,220 --> 01:41:33,800 Father is dealing with the devil. 1365 01:41:33,800 --> 01:41:36,080 Christian, you followed your father in the graveyard 1366 01:41:36,080 --> 01:41:37,310 where he buried Dylan alive. 1367 01:41:53,088 --> 01:41:56,010 [LAUGHTER] 1368 01:42:34,810 --> 01:42:37,450 We're all too scared to go to the police. 1369 01:42:37,450 --> 01:42:39,970 Dylan wasn't the only kid to go missing. 1370 01:42:39,970 --> 01:43:04,302 God only knows how many are buried in the graves out there 1371 01:43:04,302 --> 01:43:05,885 The boyfriend looks awfully nervous. 1372 01:43:09,610 --> 01:43:11,320 His heart is beating too fast, 1373 01:43:11,320 --> 01:43:13,540 Well, we best clean it out then. 1374 01:43:16,470 --> 01:43:18,570 You still got that toilet cleaner, Joseph. 1375 01:43:23,930 --> 01:43:24,730 Don't. 1376 01:43:30,892 --> 01:43:33,838 [GROANING] 1377 01:43:35,320 --> 01:43:36,820 No, no. 1378 01:43:45,180 --> 01:43:48,992 And now for you. 1379 01:43:48,992 --> 01:43:50,925 Please. 1380 01:43:50,925 --> 01:43:51,800 I'm pregnant, please. 1381 01:44:00,050 --> 01:44:03,656 The evil ends with you. 1382 01:44:06,520 --> 01:44:09,415 [SCREAMING] 1383 01:44:29,300 --> 01:44:34,140 I'll be back in an hour, it's in God's hands if you live. 1384 01:44:37,400 --> 01:44:39,455 There's no forgiveness for either of us. 1385 01:44:49,274 --> 01:44:50,880 Don't let stop singing. 1386 01:45:00,840 --> 01:45:03,828 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1387 01:46:00,600 --> 01:46:03,588 [JINGLE BELLS] 1388 01:46:26,160 --> 01:46:27,090 It's all over now. 1389 01:46:31,360 --> 01:46:32,410 What's wrong? 1390 01:46:32,410 --> 01:46:35,890 You look like you've seen the devil. 1391 01:46:35,890 --> 01:46:39,538 It's a Christmas miracle. 1392 01:46:39,538 --> 01:46:43,780 (SINGING) All things bright and beautiful, 1393 01:46:43,780 --> 01:46:47,008 all creatures great and small. 1394 01:46:49,780 --> 01:46:54,700 All things wise and wonderful, the Lord-- 1395 01:46:54,700 --> 01:46:56,326 What's the matter? 1396 01:46:56,326 --> 01:46:58,195 Please touch your tongue. 1397 01:46:58,195 --> 01:47:02,950 (SINGING) Each little flower that opens, 1398 01:47:02,950 --> 01:47:07,630 each little bird that sings. 1399 01:47:07,630 --> 01:47:17,590 He made the colored flowers, he made their tiny wings. 1400 01:47:17,590 --> 01:47:26,410 All things bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small. 1401 01:47:26,410 --> 01:47:34,070 All things wise and wonderful, the Lord God made them all. 1402 01:47:40,680 --> 01:47:43,890 Hear no evil, speak no evil. 1403 01:47:47,530 --> 01:47:48,490 See no evil. 1404 01:47:59,226 --> 01:48:02,690 (SINGING) All things bright and beautiful, 1405 01:48:02,690 --> 01:48:09,050 all creatures great and small, all things wise and wonderful, 1406 01:48:09,050 --> 01:48:12,490 the Lord God made them all. 1407 01:48:12,490 --> 01:48:16,540 What do you think of that lovely little story, Peter? 1408 01:48:16,540 --> 01:48:19,020 You like all the gory bits. 1409 01:48:19,020 --> 01:48:20,630 Aah 1410 01:48:20,630 --> 01:48:21,430 I know. 1411 01:48:21,430 --> 01:48:23,580 Hang on. 1412 01:48:23,580 --> 01:48:26,730 Do you want to hear a story about a Santa? 1413 01:48:26,730 --> 01:48:28,410 A Santa like you? 1414 01:48:28,410 --> 01:48:30,160 Yes. 1415 01:48:30,160 --> 01:48:31,340 Exactly like me. 1416 01:48:31,340 --> 01:48:33,780 How did you know? 1417 01:48:33,780 --> 01:48:37,560 There was this man, put on a Christmas outfit every year, 1418 01:48:37,560 --> 01:48:46,730 always tried to keep Christmas magic, and his wife left him. 1419 01:48:46,730 --> 01:48:50,730 Emma, what are you doing? 1420 01:48:50,730 --> 01:48:53,407 I know this is a shit time of year to do this to you, Tony. 1421 01:48:53,407 --> 01:48:54,615 What are you talking about? 1422 01:48:57,500 --> 01:49:00,850 I'm so sorry, Tony. 1423 01:49:00,850 --> 01:49:04,660 Mom, why do we have to stay so late at grandma's? 1424 01:49:04,660 --> 01:49:06,910 Go unpack, Billy, you ain't going nowhere. 1425 01:49:06,910 --> 01:49:08,710 Billy, don't listen to him. 1426 01:49:08,710 --> 01:49:10,150 Go downstairs and wait for me. 1427 01:49:14,220 --> 01:49:15,910 Do it. 1428 01:49:15,910 --> 01:49:18,112 Go downstairs. 1429 01:49:18,112 --> 01:49:19,070 We'll come and get you. 1430 01:49:23,600 --> 01:49:31,280 Please, Emma, it's Christmas. 1431 01:49:31,280 --> 01:49:34,370 We can work through this. 1432 01:49:34,370 --> 01:49:37,210 You can't fix this. 1433 01:49:37,210 --> 01:49:39,430 This hasn't been real for a long time, Tony. 1434 01:49:39,430 --> 01:49:42,730 You know that. 1435 01:49:42,730 --> 01:49:44,343 We're bipolar. 1436 01:49:44,343 --> 01:49:46,385 Our marriage is about as real as you being Santa. 1437 01:49:52,200 --> 01:49:54,075 She even tried to take his kid too. 1438 01:49:58,130 --> 01:50:02,690 You can go, but you will not take my son. 1439 01:50:06,550 --> 01:50:07,450 Watch me. 1440 01:50:12,240 --> 01:50:15,310 Mom, I can't find my robot toy. 1441 01:50:15,310 --> 01:50:16,560 Billy, don't worry about it. 1442 01:50:16,560 --> 01:50:18,360 There isn't time. 1443 01:50:18,360 --> 01:50:20,520 Stone, Emma, please. 1444 01:50:20,520 --> 01:50:21,390 for fucks sake. 1445 01:50:21,390 --> 01:50:22,770 Where are my keys 1446 01:50:22,770 --> 01:50:27,550 I will not let you take my son, not with that bastard. 1447 01:50:27,550 --> 01:50:28,890 Who was it. 1448 01:50:28,890 --> 01:50:31,080 Fine I'm putting on some weight. 1449 01:50:31,080 --> 01:50:32,040 Ridiculous. 1450 01:50:35,777 --> 01:50:36,860 But he wouldn't let her. 1451 01:50:41,580 --> 01:50:46,860 No one's going to take my son away from me. 1452 01:50:46,860 --> 01:50:50,205 See, Billy, I told you you weren't going nowhere. 1453 01:50:53,780 --> 01:50:55,940 We've always loved this tune, ain't we Emma? 1454 01:50:59,230 --> 01:51:00,600 Your mother gave us that box. 1455 01:51:03,310 --> 01:51:04,495 She's next. 1456 01:51:12,210 --> 01:51:13,065 Christmas morning. 1457 01:51:16,060 --> 01:51:20,910 Time to deck the halls with blood, 1458 01:51:20,910 --> 01:51:22,590 I even took his job away. 1459 01:51:22,590 --> 01:51:24,420 We're sorry, Tony, we just feel you're 1460 01:51:24,420 --> 01:51:27,720 no longer right for Santa's happy grotto Incorporated. 1461 01:51:27,720 --> 01:51:32,320 But on five years running, Santa of the month. 1462 01:51:32,320 --> 01:51:35,410 Well, we only operate for one month of the year. 1463 01:51:35,410 --> 01:51:37,840 You can't get rid of me. 1464 01:51:37,840 --> 01:51:39,520 Who would replace me? 1465 01:51:39,520 --> 01:51:41,890 Well, actually, we've already asked 1466 01:51:41,890 --> 01:51:45,290 Richard to take your place. 1467 01:51:45,290 --> 01:51:47,240 Richard. 1468 01:51:47,240 --> 01:51:48,380 Richard. 1469 01:51:48,380 --> 01:51:49,970 Sorry, Tony. 1470 01:51:49,970 --> 01:51:53,860 There's a new Santa in town. 1471 01:51:53,860 --> 01:52:01,460 You cannot be serious, you can't replace me with that. 1472 01:52:01,460 --> 01:52:05,210 The outfit doesn't even fit, and he's never held 1473 01:52:05,210 --> 01:52:07,970 more than a grotto in cavern. 1474 01:52:07,970 --> 01:52:09,890 I'm sorry, Tony. 1475 01:52:09,890 --> 01:52:14,160 The decisions being made. 1476 01:52:14,160 --> 01:52:18,900 Well, you can take away my grotto, 1477 01:52:18,900 --> 01:52:24,390 but you can't take my dignity. 1478 01:52:24,390 --> 01:52:35,560 I am going to take my act, and my very large bulging sack 1479 01:52:35,560 --> 01:52:44,720 elsewhere, and I'll bet you're all bloody communists. 1480 01:52:48,590 --> 01:52:51,200 Well, I don't think he's going to be on my list. 1481 01:52:51,200 --> 01:52:56,720 In the end, the grief and seeing all those children that weren't 1482 01:52:56,720 --> 01:53:08,310 his drove him and should we say odd, so we got revenge, 1483 01:53:08,310 --> 01:53:10,500 and handed out festive treats. 1484 01:53:10,500 --> 01:53:13,098 Where are my cookies from Santa, mommy? 1485 01:53:13,098 --> 01:53:15,390 You can't have them now, darling, it spoil your meal. 1486 01:53:15,390 --> 01:53:17,130 But look. 1487 01:53:17,130 --> 01:53:19,800 There has already been one reported fatality here today. 1488 01:53:19,800 --> 01:53:22,710 The police are desperately seeking anyone who has visited 1489 01:53:22,710 --> 01:53:26,280 the grotto as they believe that there is poisonous cookies 1490 01:53:26,280 --> 01:53:28,210 handed out by Santa. 1491 01:53:28,210 --> 01:53:29,010 Oh my God. 1492 01:53:29,010 --> 01:53:32,930 The Information right now is he was a member of ISIS. 1493 01:53:32,930 --> 01:53:36,810 Mommy, you stole my cookies. 1494 01:53:36,810 --> 01:53:38,700 And this elf just came out screaming at us, 1495 01:53:38,700 --> 01:53:39,960 my youngest is traumatized. 1496 01:53:39,960 --> 01:53:42,570 He was screaming out, stop. 1497 01:53:42,570 --> 01:53:44,910 I will be suing Happy Santas Grotto, Incorporated. 1498 01:53:44,910 --> 01:53:47,228 This is just not good enough. 1499 01:53:47,228 --> 01:53:49,020 As you can see, we've had a lot of trauma 1500 01:53:49,020 --> 01:53:50,040 tonight at the grotto. 1501 01:53:50,040 --> 01:53:51,600 We've had one girl who won't stop 1502 01:53:51,600 --> 01:53:53,040 crying at the sight of a reindeer, 1503 01:53:53,040 --> 01:53:55,080 and another who tried to choke herself to death 1504 01:53:55,080 --> 01:53:56,340 with a Tamagotchi. 1505 01:53:56,340 --> 01:53:58,510 She corrected awful kids on the street. 1506 01:53:58,510 --> 01:54:00,180 Oh, Santa. 1507 01:54:00,180 --> 01:54:01,740 You walking back to the North Pole 1508 01:54:01,740 --> 01:54:04,365 because you're too fat for your reindeer to pull your ass back. 1509 01:54:08,900 --> 01:54:10,190 Oh, well, done Leo. 1510 01:54:10,190 --> 01:54:12,040 Now you've pissed off Santa. 1511 01:54:12,040 --> 01:54:13,580 Oh, what's the matter? 1512 01:54:13,580 --> 01:54:14,750 Where's my present? 1513 01:54:14,750 --> 01:54:15,930 I'll leave it out, Leo. 1514 01:54:15,930 --> 01:54:16,730 Look at him. 1515 01:54:16,730 --> 01:54:18,650 He's obviously had a bad Christmas. 1516 01:54:18,650 --> 01:54:20,700 So would I dressed up like that. 1517 01:54:20,700 --> 01:54:23,000 Oh, I'm having a bad Christmas too. 1518 01:54:23,000 --> 01:54:24,800 That's why I want my present. 1519 01:54:24,800 --> 01:54:28,110 You don't know nothing about a bad Christmas, kid. 1520 01:54:28,110 --> 01:54:28,910 Just leave him. 1521 01:54:28,910 --> 01:54:30,380 He's been drinking. 1522 01:54:30,380 --> 01:54:31,670 Come on guys, let's go. 1523 01:54:31,670 --> 01:54:32,470 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1524 01:54:32,470 --> 01:54:34,910 Through the window, I can the-- 1525 01:54:34,910 --> 01:54:36,170 What did you say? 1526 01:54:36,170 --> 01:54:42,390 No, I've something in my sack for you. 1527 01:54:42,390 --> 01:54:44,120 I think he's had some funny mince pies. 1528 01:54:44,120 --> 01:54:45,170 He's getting creepy. 1529 01:54:45,170 --> 01:54:46,460 Come on, let's go. 1530 01:54:46,460 --> 01:54:48,170 You being funny. 1531 01:54:48,170 --> 01:54:51,380 Not feeling very jolly this Christmas. 1532 01:54:51,380 --> 01:54:52,490 Jesus Christ. 1533 01:54:52,490 --> 01:54:54,200 I'm not Jesus, I'm Santa. 1534 01:54:57,350 --> 01:54:58,700 Went round all the houses. 1535 01:55:01,850 --> 01:55:04,370 Oh, dad, what are you doing. 1536 01:55:04,370 --> 01:55:05,600 You just got us killed. 1537 01:55:05,600 --> 01:55:10,460 No dear, it's you not riding your reindeer zombie right. 1538 01:55:10,460 --> 01:55:11,690 I'm riding it fine. 1539 01:55:11,690 --> 01:55:13,744 You need to stop dying on exploding presents. 1540 01:55:13,744 --> 01:55:14,544 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1541 01:55:14,544 --> 01:55:19,800 Bring me too, we can fall in love With Christmas 1542 01:55:19,800 --> 01:55:28,277 if we want to one by one the family start rising. 1543 01:55:32,253 --> 01:55:33,230 It's Santa. 1544 01:55:33,230 --> 01:55:35,660 The real Santa is here. 1545 01:55:35,660 --> 01:55:36,860 There's no one there, Ben. 1546 01:55:36,860 --> 01:55:38,700 But I swear it was him. 1547 01:55:38,700 --> 01:55:40,470 He was real. 1548 01:55:40,470 --> 01:55:43,280 I think Josh scared you a little bit too much earlier. 1549 01:55:43,280 --> 01:55:45,170 No one believes me in this house. 1550 01:55:45,170 --> 01:55:47,140 You suck. 1551 01:55:47,140 --> 01:55:50,270 I hate you guys, Christmas. 1552 01:55:50,270 --> 01:55:51,440 Ben. 1553 01:55:51,440 --> 01:55:54,110 I'm going to go play my video game. 1554 01:55:54,110 --> 01:55:55,610 And what about the Christmas cake? 1555 01:55:55,610 --> 01:55:57,360 Christmas cake is more likely to kill me 1556 01:55:57,360 --> 01:55:59,310 than to kill our elves. 1557 01:55:59,310 --> 01:56:00,110 Oh, thanks. 1558 01:56:03,160 --> 01:56:05,480 For a wonderful Christmas. 1559 01:56:05,480 --> 01:56:06,280 Killing families. 1560 01:56:10,030 --> 01:56:12,280 You've got some giant bits. 1561 01:56:12,280 --> 01:56:17,270 [SINISTER LAUGHTER] 1562 01:56:17,270 --> 01:56:20,335 You like Christmas games where people get killed, kid. 1563 01:56:26,160 --> 01:56:29,415 How about Santa brings you a real game this year? 1564 01:56:31,980 --> 01:56:33,540 And telling kids stories to cover up 1565 01:56:33,540 --> 01:56:36,150 the real horrific story he was carrying. 1566 01:56:36,150 --> 01:56:38,250 Hello, Benny boy. 1567 01:56:38,250 --> 01:56:40,620 Santa has come to pay you a visit. 1568 01:56:44,690 --> 01:56:46,580 What happened to him? 1569 01:56:46,580 --> 01:56:50,430 Jeffrey Dahmer, 1570 01:56:50,430 --> 01:56:52,710 [LAUGHTER] 1571 01:56:56,120 --> 01:57:01,260 This is so funny, Where's your finger to film? 1572 01:57:01,260 --> 01:57:04,230 It's-- it's a bit different to Rudolph's great 1573 01:57:04,230 --> 01:57:05,970 Happy Christmas adventure. 1574 01:57:05,970 --> 01:57:09,540 Though I'd come round here, and be like the three ghosts 1575 01:57:09,540 --> 01:57:12,180 of Christmas, all rolled into one 1576 01:57:12,180 --> 01:57:18,460 and tell you three great Christmas stories. 1577 01:57:18,460 --> 01:57:21,310 I got you a special copy. 1578 01:57:21,310 --> 01:57:22,110 Really. 1579 01:57:22,110 --> 01:57:25,500 My parents wouldn't even let me watch TV. 1580 01:57:25,500 --> 01:57:28,270 No, don't worry about it. 1581 01:57:28,270 --> 01:57:30,510 I've sorted it all out with your parents. 1582 01:57:30,510 --> 01:57:33,790 This film is banned in 27 countries, 1583 01:57:33,790 --> 01:57:36,930 so hasn't got any rating. 1584 01:57:36,930 --> 01:57:42,150 This is the last present of Luke Everard. 1585 01:57:44,840 --> 01:57:48,970 It's freaks out here, and they sense it too, you know, 1586 01:57:48,970 --> 01:57:49,945 it's shocking. 1587 01:57:55,590 --> 01:58:03,890 I think I've cheered you up enough parents 1588 01:58:03,890 --> 01:58:06,200 you're feeling better now. 1589 01:58:06,200 --> 01:58:07,370 You've got to help me. 1590 01:58:07,370 --> 01:58:09,560 The Santa broke into our house, and then he 1591 01:58:09,560 --> 01:58:13,160 started telling me all these crazy Christmas stories. 1592 01:58:13,160 --> 01:58:14,630 And he's got this huge-- 1593 01:58:17,265 --> 01:58:23,850 You didn't ask the bill payer's permission, 1594 01:58:23,850 --> 01:58:26,070 and now she's dead. 1595 01:58:26,070 --> 01:58:28,650 But that's still no excuse. 1596 01:58:31,530 --> 01:58:33,150 Does funny things with the head when 1597 01:58:33,150 --> 01:58:35,520 a father loses their child. 1598 01:58:35,520 --> 01:58:37,303 Worse than any child's new computer game. 1599 01:58:37,303 --> 01:58:38,970 You can kill as many kids as you like, 1600 01:58:38,970 --> 01:58:40,695 and get rewarded with extra bullets. 1601 01:58:40,695 --> 01:58:42,780 [LAUGHTER] 1602 01:58:42,780 --> 01:58:45,330 And worse than all the gory toys in a world, 1603 01:58:45,330 --> 01:58:47,310 you can put him up on a shelf with all 1604 01:58:47,310 --> 01:58:48,600 the others I bought you. 1605 01:58:53,290 --> 01:58:55,910 He even stopped enjoying a carols. 1606 01:58:55,910 --> 01:58:57,860 Goulet singing. 1607 01:58:57,860 --> 01:58:59,780 I've ripped out a vocal cords of people 1608 01:58:59,780 --> 01:59:01,075 who sang better than that. 1609 01:59:03,950 --> 01:59:05,960 Many of you put on a Santa costume, 1610 01:59:05,960 --> 01:59:09,050 people think they can take bloody liberties, 1611 01:59:09,050 --> 01:59:11,525 although the mince pies are a bit of a bonus. 1612 01:59:27,240 --> 01:59:29,360 Delicious. 1613 01:59:29,360 --> 01:59:30,763 Don't worry, Ben. 1614 01:59:30,763 --> 01:59:32,180 Those, social workers aren't going 1615 01:59:32,180 --> 01:59:35,990 to take you and the other kids away ever again. 1616 01:59:35,990 --> 01:59:38,030 You're going to spend Christmas Day with me. 1617 01:59:38,030 --> 01:59:40,970 [LAUGHTER] 1618 01:59:40,970 --> 01:59:44,380 And we are going to have the best Christmas ever. 1619 01:59:47,470 --> 01:59:54,860 No justice for fathers, you know. 1620 01:59:54,860 --> 01:59:57,630 Not even Father Christmas. 1621 01:59:57,630 --> 01:59:59,040 You could blame a man for letting 1622 01:59:59,040 --> 02:00:01,080 himself go putting on weight, stopping shaving, 1623 02:00:01,080 --> 02:00:03,540 and running away to a desolate cold landscape 1624 02:00:03,540 --> 02:00:06,345 with thousands of made up little creatures creating toys. 1625 02:00:11,070 --> 02:00:19,000 Toys his child we'll never play with. 1626 02:00:23,570 --> 02:00:29,630 That is why I carry a machete like this in my bag. 1627 02:00:29,630 --> 02:00:32,620 Peter, where are you? 1628 02:00:32,620 --> 02:00:38,200 You stay while I go and sort your mom out. 1629 02:00:38,200 --> 02:00:40,480 While he was finishing off my family, 1630 02:00:40,480 --> 02:00:42,775 I managed to escape into the snow. 1631 02:00:48,050 --> 02:00:49,820 I wish people would just accept 1632 02:00:49,820 --> 02:00:52,070 where they're going to die. 1633 02:00:52,070 --> 02:00:54,050 Christmas is hard enough without them 1634 02:00:54,050 --> 02:00:55,805 fucking clinging on to life. 1635 02:01:03,120 --> 02:01:06,870 Peter, where are you you little shit? 1636 02:01:12,190 --> 02:01:17,790 Peter, I've got a nice little present for you, 1637 02:01:17,790 --> 02:01:22,560 Peter come on out. 1638 02:01:22,560 --> 02:01:25,410 I know you're here somewhere. 1639 02:01:25,410 --> 02:01:27,670 Peter. 1640 02:01:27,670 --> 02:01:28,470 Peter. 1641 02:01:35,560 --> 02:01:38,785 Kids these days, all of them, little shits. 1642 02:01:58,260 --> 02:02:00,800 I know you're in there. 1643 02:02:00,800 --> 02:02:04,775 I'm going to skin you alive like Peter fucking rabbit. 1644 02:02:19,380 --> 02:02:22,050 Jesus is going to save you now kid. 1645 02:02:59,380 --> 02:03:03,080 [GASPING] 1646 02:03:03,080 --> 02:03:05,840 That's when I stabbed him with the machete he dropped. 1647 02:03:29,070 --> 02:03:32,590 And that's the Christmas I found out Santa is not real. 1648 02:03:32,590 --> 02:03:34,120 He's a mental psychopath. 1649 02:03:47,040 --> 02:03:53,190 Then I ended up here, in this children's home. 1650 02:03:53,190 --> 02:03:55,170 Santa is coming for you. 1651 02:03:55,170 --> 02:03:56,880 Nearly Christmas time again. 1652 02:03:56,880 --> 02:03:58,260 Leave me alone. 1653 02:03:58,260 --> 02:03:59,910 He finished off your family and now 1654 02:03:59,910 --> 02:04:01,410 he's going to finish off you. 1655 02:04:01,410 --> 02:04:02,320 Stop him. 1656 02:04:02,320 --> 02:04:04,840 He's going to skin you alive like Peter rabbit. 1657 02:04:04,840 --> 02:04:05,640 Stop it. 1658 02:04:05,640 --> 02:04:09,810 On the 12th killer Christmas Day Santa said to me, 1659 02:04:09,810 --> 02:04:12,640 a dead family in a fern tree. 1660 02:04:16,140 --> 02:04:19,130 Can you hear a sleigh coming with all the dead kids. 1661 02:04:19,130 --> 02:04:20,820 Halt Harry, leave him alone. 1662 02:04:20,820 --> 02:04:21,870 Don't worry. 1663 02:04:21,870 --> 02:04:22,800 We're done anyway. 1664 02:04:22,800 --> 02:04:24,315 Yeah, little pussy. 1665 02:04:34,530 --> 02:04:37,200 Try and ignore them, Peter. 1666 02:04:37,200 --> 02:04:41,190 They aren't seeing their families either this Christmas. 1667 02:04:41,190 --> 02:04:43,050 Their families were murdered. 1668 02:04:43,050 --> 02:04:44,850 At least your family wanted you. 1669 02:04:44,850 --> 02:04:48,120 My crack addict mom would rather be in prison. 1670 02:04:48,120 --> 02:04:51,930 Christmas can go fuck itself. 1671 02:04:51,930 --> 02:04:55,730 We never going to escape Christmas, are we? 1672 02:05:17,275 --> 02:05:22,320 What the hell are you doing you little creep? 1673 02:05:22,320 --> 02:05:23,335 You trying to scare me? 1674 02:05:27,245 --> 02:05:28,045 Holt? 1675 02:05:48,720 --> 02:05:51,450 You were always nice to me, so-- 1676 02:05:51,450 --> 02:05:53,260 and so let you live. 1677 02:05:53,260 --> 02:05:56,380 Think of it as my Christmas present. 1678 02:06:08,840 --> 02:06:12,320 Yeah, might need it. 1679 02:06:12,320 --> 02:06:14,390 It is Christmas Day tomorrow after all. 1680 02:06:19,420 --> 02:06:21,810 Have a Merry Christmas. 1681 02:06:21,810 --> 02:06:22,610 [MUSIC PLAYING] 1682 02:06:22,610 --> 02:06:27,730 The animals have turned white. 1683 02:06:27,730 --> 02:06:34,250 Santa is dropping bombs tonight, it's getting cold, 1684 02:06:34,250 --> 02:06:40,930 here's the snow, and I know you won't be home, 1685 02:06:40,930 --> 02:06:46,060 I'm changing you in fall out light, 1686 02:06:46,060 --> 02:06:50,080 and I can see your lips turning blue, 1687 02:06:50,080 --> 02:06:59,230 I shouldn't have fallen in love with a homicidal Eskimo. 1688 02:06:59,230 --> 02:07:08,480 I see her bubble off the wall, hanging down from a tree. 1689 02:07:08,480 --> 02:07:16,495 I see her bubble off the wall, hung in a pagan dream. 1690 02:07:19,840 --> 02:07:27,280 The reindeer heads all looked out they would be pulling out 1691 02:07:27,280 --> 02:07:36,660 of town, sat in this old leather chair, my hunting rifle loaded 1692 02:07:36,660 --> 02:07:43,220 here, watching us far from the sky, 1693 02:07:43,220 --> 02:07:47,250 we're three feet deep in dust and bones. 1694 02:07:47,250 --> 02:07:56,410 None of the children gone to war, I got to be coming home. 1695 02:07:56,410 --> 02:08:05,720 I see her bubble off the wall, hanging out from a my tree. 1696 02:08:05,720 --> 02:08:13,620 I see a bubble off the wall, hung in a pagan dream. 1697 02:08:17,240 --> 02:08:26,080 The misteletoe and your smiles, dancing pretty in rubble, 1698 02:08:26,080 --> 02:08:33,058 the antlers that you like to wear, before you cross yourself 1699 02:08:33,058 --> 02:08:35,216 and lift his head. 1700 02:08:35,216 --> 02:08:44,600 I see her bubble of the wall, hanging down I'm from a tree. 1701 02:08:44,600 --> 02:08:52,202 I see her bubble off the wall hung in the pagan dream. 1702 02:08:55,810 --> 02:09:04,600 I see her bubble off the wall, hanging down from a tree, 1703 02:09:04,600 --> 02:09:14,140 I see her bubble off the wall, hung in a pagan dream.