Downloaded from YTS.MX
[light guitar intro playing]
[***]
Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX
[Maggie] * Here we come a-wassailing *
* Among the leaves so green *
* Here we come a-wand'ring *
* So fair to be seen *
* Love and joy, come to you *
* And to your wassail, too *
* God bless you, and send you a Happy New Year *
* God send you a Happy New Year *
* Here we come a-wassailing *
* Among the leaves so green *
* Here we come a-wand'ring *
* So fair to be seen *
* Love and joy, come to you *
* And to your wassail, too *
* God bless you, and send you a Happy New Year *
* God send you a Happy New Year *
* God send you a happy New Year *
[patrons applauding]
Whoo!
Thank you!
I'm Maggie McKenzie,
and I'll be in Chicago for three nights,
starting Thursday,
opening for the Dalton Blake Band.
[applause]
I hope you all have a wonderful holiday,
and I'll see you on the road in the New Year.
Good night!
[applause]
Thank you.
Hey, Lewis!
What are you doing here?
What, a manager can't come see his favorite client?
Well, your oldest client, but thanks for trying.
Great crowd, huh?
What's wrong?
Okay. Look, Maggie...
I'm sorry,
but Dalton Blake didn't sell as many tickets
as he expected to for Chicago.
He's canceling the shows?
Oh... he's canceling me.
Look, he just wanted
a stronger opening act, you know?
Somebody who could put more people in seats.
Lewis, I really needed this.
I know, I'm sorry,
but my idea is take advantage of the time.
Go home, relax,
write me a big hit,
and we'll start the year off strong, huh?
Yeah, I'll get right on that.
Maybe this will help...
Oh, you didn't have to do that.
Oh, I know... but it's kinda for me, too.
Gee...
what are you trying to tell me?
Look, this phone is loaded with all the Archline apps
that help with lyrics and sound,
and it's got this amazing auto-tune feature--
that you obviously don't need, of course.
Of course. Yeah, is the receipt in here?
Because I could return it--
along with the Archline apps I won't be using,
and use the money to get my van serviced.
Plus, you know, this baby...
-[flick] -...works just fine.
Please... just check it out?
Play with it for a while,
see what you come up with.
Merry Christmas, Lewis.
That hit song isn't as far away as you think!
[sighs]
[door rumbles]
[rumble-thud]
[door thuds]
[starter sputtering]
[sputtering, failing to catch]
[engine starts]
[Maggie] Good news, Mom!
I'm gonna be home a little earlier than expected.
Everything's fine, just a... change of plans.
You know how it is.
[clack]
[***]
[door thuds]
Ah... well, there's my girl!
[laughing]
Hey, Dad.
Maggie! Oh!
[laughing]
Welcome home, sweetheart!
Oh, you must be exhausted.
Yeah.
Well, we've got soup on, and there's apple pie...
Okay, to be fair, we "may"have some apple pie.
-Ed! -Well, let me take that for you.
I just baked that pie yesterday!
Well, you shouldn't bake it so well
if you don't want me to eat it, right?
Oh... he's incorrigible!
[chuckles]
-Vanilla ice cream-- -Honestly!
[***]
[Charles] Despite his vast holdings,
your father's trust was very simple.
With two exceptions,
everything goes to his endowments.
-[phone buzzes] -Exception one--
Piper...
he set up a trust fund for Mia and Max,
and since you indicated to him
that you will have no more children,
he did not leave anything additional.
Archer...
he did not leave a trust
for any future children you may have.
Makes sense.
There's no guarantee I'll ever have any.
No, he said it was because Piper had children first,
so she wins and gets the money.
[scoffs] That makes even more sense.
You never miss a chance to dump on him, do you?
And you never miss a chance to defend him.
May I speak bluntly?
Of course.
[Charles] I've known you two for most of your lives,
and I've never understood
this obsession your father has had
with pitting you against each other,
and maybe now that your father is gone,
you two can build on a new kind of relationship.
-[phone buzzes] -[Charles sighing heavily]
You know, they've invented a way to turn those off.
I could show you, if you don't understand how.
It's work. It can't wait.
Fine.
Charles, you mentioned there were two exceptions?
What's the second one?
Your father's seat on the Board of Directors
of his company--
in keeping with his custom,
your father willed that seat
to whichever one of you had the higher net worth
as of 12:01 on Christmas morning.
Yes!
[***]
So... what are you guys doing for Christmas?
Going to Aspen. I got us a suite at the Dell.
Oh, we stayed there, right?
We did.
I remember you beat me down the slopes every time.
What are you doing this year?
Probably just staying in town. Pretty busy.
Me too.
I'll be working in Aspen.
Oh! I was going through some things at Dad's,
and I found this in the closet.
I thought you might like it.
Oh, wow!
[Piper] Remember?
Yeah, up-- up by the Finger Lakes.
That was the only time
we ever had a real Christmas tree, wasn't it?
Hey, there were trees in the hotel lobbies
all those other years.
Hotel trees don't count.
We cut it down at that funny place.
[chuckles] Yeah.
Hey... I'm sorry about Dad's board position.
No, you're not.
You're right, I'm not.
But I am sorry that it had to be at your expense.
I had a really good year
with both settlements coming through.
Next year, it might've been you instead.
[car horn honks]
Merry Christmas, Piper.
You too.
[***]
Merry Christmas, Uncle Archer.
Uh... Merry Christmas!
[chuckles awkwardly]
[***]
[chuckling]
Perfect!
Now you put it in the envelope,
and it'll go straight to Santa.
Ah! I know that hug anywhere!
[laughing]
* My bestie's back in town! *
* My bestie's back in town! * -[squeals] Ahh!
Aww!
Hi, Tia Maggie!
Lucy-Moose. I missed you!
Hey, what's that you're wearing?
You sent it from Maine.
I remember! Wow, it looks good on you.
Perfect size, by the way.
-[laughs] -I love it.
Thank you, again.
Of course.
Do you want to write your letter to Santa now?
-Yeah? Okay. -Yeah.
I don't suppose your mother made her famous coffee?
Is the Earth still spinning?
[laughs] Yes!
Luce, we'll be back in a minute, okay?
Oh, it's so good to see you.
So, what else has been going on around here
since we last talked?
Well, you remember I was telling you
about Lucy's little Christmas choir?
Yeah, how's that going?
Bad to worse.
It's small, and the kids are bored to tears,
but do you want to know the latest tea?
Spill it!
So, the director met the love of his life online
and decided to, um, rather impulsively,
fly down to Florida to visit her for the holidays.
-I have questions-- -Me too.
But, more importantly...
we need a director,
and since you're home early--?
The hardest of passes.
Oh, come on! It's just until the Christmas Eve concert.
Just a couple of weeks.
There's even a small stipend.
Well, a stipend would be lovely,
but I don't know anything
about leading a children's choir.
Oh, excuse me, you sang in that very same choir for 10 years!
So did you! You can lead it.
Oh, no, I can't, because I have no musical talent.
They really only let me sing in that choir
because I brought enthusiasm and double-chocolate brownies.
Oh, I remember those brownies!
Those were next level.
I can make you a tray of them later today,
if you say yes.
Well, they weren't that good!
You may be able to say no to me...
...but can you say no to this beautiful face?
[chuckles]
Are you sure about waiting until the New Year
to announce both new apps?
-I'm sure. It's-- -Okay.
...A family thing.
Anything else?
No. Um, but about that...
About what?
Family.
Uh, I know it's been a few weeks,
and we all sent flowers,
but I just wanted to say
I was sorry to hear about your father.
Thank you.
[***]
* Tell me, baby are you coming home? *
[***]
* Yes, darling I'm coming home *
[***]
* Snow is fallin' and I'm all alone *
[***]
* Yes, darling I'm coming home *
[***]
* Everything's all right *
* Christmas lights are shining bright *
[***]
* And there's a star up in the sky *
* It shines for you and I... *
TJ.
I'm gonna be AWOL until after Christmas.
I need inspiration for our rollout--
especially "Project Harmonies"--
so, uh, if I don't talk to you,
have a happy holiday.
Yeah, talk to you then.
[***]
[children singing off-key] * O, Christmas tree *
* How lovely are thy branches *
Okay! Great job, kids.
Keep practicing and I'll see you next time.
[children chattering excitedly]
[phone ringing]
[continues ringing]
[sighing] Lewis.
[claps shut]
[sighs]
[***]
[door thuds]
[***]
Archer Donovan?
Oscar Carr.
Hope you haven't been waiting too long?
Just got here.
Uh, listen, Archer, like I said on the phone,
I'm sure we can find you something nicer--
Nope.
This is the one I want.
Okay, well, I came by last night
to start the fridge, the furnace,
and the hot water.
Anything goes out, just give me a text.
Okay.
There is Wifi, but it's not always great.
All right.
Okay. Oh! By the way,
there used to be a Christmas tree farm around here?
Ed's-- just up the road a bit.
Thanks again.
[***]
[puffs]
Ahem.
[***]
It's the best ever.
Hey there.
Janet McKenzie.
Are you looking for a tree?
I am. I've... never had one before.
[gasps]
Never?
Well, once as a kid, but not as an adult, so.
Oh, do you wanna chop down your own?
Well, for that, you're gonna need a little expert guidance.
[chuckles]
Uh...
Ed seems to be swamped at the moment,
but my daughter is around here someplace.
L-Let me get her for you.
Oh, that's fine.
I can find her.
Okay.
Hmm.
[Maggie] * 'Tis the season to be jolly *
* Fa-la-la-la-la la, la, la, la *
-[pig snorting] -* Don we now our gay apparel *
* Fa-la-la, la-la-la la, la, la *
-[whack] -[clatter-crash]
[pigs squealing]
You scared Johnny and June!
Oh!
[squealing]
[laughs] I'm sorry.
I'm just teasing. They're fine.
Here, you can make it up to them with some blueberries.
Okay.
Come on.
Hello.
Are you interested in--
oh, you are interested!
Oh, wow. You're hungry.
Sorry, I, uh...
scared them.
Oh! No, a car horn would scare these piggies.
They're just silly.
[pigs squealing and chuffing]
Anyway, were you looking for me?
Right now, I'm just looking for my dignity.
Oh, well, I'm sure it's around here somewhere.
I'll let you know if I find it.
[clearing throat] Um...
I came for, uh, a tree.
I've never had one before,
and your mom said you are the expert.
You've never chopped down a tree,
or you've never had a tree?
Correct. Both.
Well, once, as a kid, we had one.
Let's find you a tree.
Come on.
[Johnny and June oinking]
-Bye, little guys. -[squealing in protest]
Whoa.
These would fit in a normal-sized room.
Is your ceiling standard height?
Maybe, I guess?
This one looks nice.
Hmm.
What? What's wrong with it?
It's a little crooked. Not good for a first-timer.
Hmm.
Oh, but look here.
Oh, yeah... yeah, I like this one.
Uh!
-No, I don't! -Why not?
There's a thing in there. It's looking back at me. I--
Oh, it's a possum!
A little Ronnie.
A "Ronnie"?
Oh, my dad names animals.
All possums on the property are called "Ronnie".
All squirrels are called "Stumpy".
Don't even get me started on raccoons.
I-I don't know why he does it,
but, um, I-I will happily dislodge Ronnie
if you have your heart set on this tree.
Absolutely not. The last thing I need
is a possum eviction on my soul.
Uh...
what about this one?
Yup... currently vacant.
I think we have a winner.
All right.
I'll hold, you saw-- as close to the ground as you can.
Let's do this.
All right.
So, uh...
right before I made my grand entrance,
I heard you singing.
You've got a great voice.
Thanks.
It's actually my job.
Oh?
Maggie McKenzie--
Uh...
Uh, don't worry, I-I'm one of those
"constantly touring, playing every gig I can,
always broke" musicians.
I have about 12 fans
and no one else has ever heard of me.
Archer Donovan.
No one's ever heard of me either.
[chuckles] Are you in the business?
Not really. Not like you.
I own a company called Archline.
We make, um--
I know what you make.
I know all about you.
You make apps so that people can pretend to be musicians
instead of doing the actual hard work to understand music,
so they can rip off the talented people
who built this industry.
[snapping]
It's funny-- I was actually gonna
make that our corporate motto,
but it wouldn't fit on the business card.
Make sure you keep it in water.
Dry trees are a fire hazard.
Okay.
No candles, obviously,
and fill the stand with water twice a day.
Right. I'll need a stand for it.
You sell those here?
-Nope. -Okay, I'll find one online.
Let it breathe for two days.
The branches need to relax before you decorate.
Two days of breathing. Got it.
Is this really your first tree, or did you just make that up?
Why would I make that up?
I don't know why you do anything.
Probably because we just met.
My dad will ring you up.
Thanks for shopping at Ed's--
home of holiday trees, micro pigs,
and antiquated musicians who still believe
that talent matters.
Is that on your letterhead?
[***]
[clears throat]
Well...
sounds like you stepped into something, huh?
I sank all the way up to my ankles in it.
Mm-hmm. [chuckles]
She reminds me more and more of her mother every single day.
Here, let me grab that for ya and bring it to your car.
How far do you gotta go?
Uh, just up the road.
I'm staying at Billsboro House.
No kidding?
Wow! Good for you.
I've always loved that place.
Let me get that for ya.
All right, where's your car, again?
Just over there.
[Ed] All right.
[***]
* O, Christmas tree *
* Thy leaves are so unchanging *
* O, Christmas tree... *
* O, Christmas tree *
* Thy leaves are so unchanging *
[***]
Stay. Stay...
Stay.
* O, Christmas tree O, Christmas tree *
* Thy leaves are so unchanging *
* Yeah! *
[***]
[splashing]
I'm nailing this "Christmas" thing.
[grunts]
Whew, okay.
* O, Christmas tree O, Christmas tree *
* Thy candles shine so brightly *
[phone ringing]
Well...
that fella really wound you up out there today.
Anything I need to go talk to him about?
[chuckles] I appreciate that, but this is entirely on me.
Is he a fan?
No.
He's in the business side of music,
which is "ick" right there.
He and I both know where this industry is going,
except he was smart enough to capitalize on it,
and I was not.
Hmm. So, he's smart
and he's got himself some money,
and that makes him the bad guy?
Yes.
I don't know... maybe.
I guess.
Maybe you owe him an apology?
I definitely do not!
Well, he's staying down at the Billsboro House...
if you remember your manners.
Well, what about his manners?
Oh, is he mad at you simply for existing, too?
-[phone ringing] -Hmph.
I'll get it.
[ringing]
Ed's Tree Farm. This is Maggie.
Maggie, finally.
I've been trying to reach you all day!
Don't you dare hang up this phone.
Lewis?
How'd you get this number?
I've always had this number.
It's your emergency contact,
and since you're not answering the phone that I gave you--
Yeah, Christmas rush. Sorry.
Uh-huh. Well, look,
I'm just calling to check in, you know?
See how the new cell phone is working out,
if you've been doing any writing?
I haven't had a chance to set up the new phone
or write.
Sorry.
Maggie, can I be blunt?
You're always blunt.
Look, there's no nice way to say this,
but the business is leaving you behind.
I-I'm having a hard time booking you
in any place bigger than a coffee shop right now.
I see.
I don't want you to go to a dark place on this,
but my point is,
I just need you to write me something solid.
We'll bring it into the studio, we'll clean it up, you know?
I know you don't like the bells and whistles,
but that phone--
Uh, so, Lewis,
a pig just got loose-- sorry, I gotta go!
-Bye. -[slam]
Oops.
Guess you told him.
[chuckles lightly]
[***]
[laughter, indistinct exchange]
Oh! What is this?
Lewis gave it to me,
so I'm gifting it to you
since you're currently phoneless,
thanks to someone we shall not identify.
I redirected the house number to it.
Seems a lot smarter than my normal old phone--
like, it's going to manage my finances
and, uh, tune up my transmission for me
without asking.
Yeah, Lewis seems to think it can do all that and more,
but you don't need to worry about that
unless you suddenly decide
you want to become a social-media star.
It has all those, um...
apps from the guy who bought the tree today.
Ah, you mean that really nice man
who's staying all alone at Billsboro?
Laying it on a little thick, there, Mom.
[sighs]
Fine, I'll--
I'll run down to Billsboro House and apologize.
Proud of you.
Even though I wasn't wrong.
Of course not!
[Janet laughs]
Oh, uh, hey, do we still have those Christmas supplies
in the barn?
Have you ever known your father to throw out anything?
I'm right here.
[laughs]
[***]
[knocking on door]
[***]
Hi.
Will you except an apology
in the shape of a free tree stand
and some hopelessly-tangled tree lights?
I will accept it all with gratitude.
Come on in.
Thanks.
Wow.
Always wanted to see inside of this place.
It's gorgeous.
Well, that's 'cause you weren't here four hours ago,
when everything was covered in dust.
Yeah, it's-- I haven't even started on the upstairs yet.
It's gonna be an ibuprofen-kinda night.
Oh, and there was a spider
that will have a starring role in my nightmares for years.
You know, I was kinda surprised that you were staying here.
I heard it's been empty for a while.
No, it's just an old, traditional place.
I didn't think that was your brand.
Hmm!
You know, the, uh...
old and the new can peacefully coexist,
and I don't have a brand.
That's not really something that people do
in the real world.
All right. Well, I-I just came by to--
Wait. Where's your tree?
It's soaking in water.
Where?
Oh, upstairs in the bathtub.
I'm joking. It's outside.
[Maggie] Seriously?
You told me to put it in water.
Yeah, inside the house.
I didn't have a stand, I didn't have a bucket--
I improvised. It's fine, it's fine.
All I gotta do... is give it a little tug.
Give it...
Yeah, this ice really isn't good for the tree.
Well, I'm not really worried about hurting it.
Okay, let's think this through.
I can't bring the tree into the house
when there's an iceberg attached to it, so...
I just have to break up the ice...
...by using a blow-dryer?
Or...
you could saw off a little more of the trunk
just above the ice?
Okay.
Yes! Exactly. Let's do that.
Okay, uh... ah!
How much you wanna bet
that this barn has got a saw in it, hey?
[engine vrooms]
[***]
Fine. I-I can do it myself.
Okay... I can do it myself.
Hey!
How'd it go with that fella down at the Billsboro House?
Oh.
So, get this--
he didn't have a bucket or a tree stand,
and yes, I told him to put it in water--
so he finds this tub, and puts it in that--
outside! [laughs]
So, the tree was cemented
in this clawfoot tub filled with ice,
and he didn't know how to fix it.
Well...
he did tell you
he's never had a Christmas tree before, right?
[sighs]
[knocking]
[***]
If I have to keep apologizing,
I'll have your whole place decorated.
Here's some exterior lights in case you wanna--
I don't know.
Come on in.
Why does it smell so delightful in here?
Oh, it's probably the cinnamon rolls.
These are old-school! Nice. Thank you.
You made these?
Uh... I did!
Yeah, it takes a few minutes for the yeast to rise,
but after that, it's pretty simple.
You made these from scratch?
Yeah. I've been baking since I was 14.
No judgement, but that's kinda random.
Uh, well, it was a money-making venture.
You wouldn't believe what high-school kids
pay for home-baked,
but before you become too impressed with my talents,
this tree rookie...
needs a bit of help?
Well, that's not a rookie issue--
tree-straightening is a two-person job.
Here, if you wanna loosen the base--
Oh, yeah.
[grunts]
Okay. Yeah.
All right...
Okay, lock it in!
Okay.
Have you thought about ornaments?
Yeah, I was thinking about just going online
and buying a bunch of stuff.
Or you could support local businesses.
Or I could just keep irritating you
and accept apology decorations?
Hey, is that you in these pictures over here?
Oh, uh... yeah.
So, you've been here before?
Just the one time.
Well, it must've been a good time, if you came back?
It was my best Christmas ever.
Is that when you got the tree?
Yes, actually. We got it
from a little place called Ed's. You ever heard of it?
-Really? [laughing] -Yeah.
So, where's your family now?
Uh, can I interest you in some cinnamon rolls?
I only know how to bake in large quantities,
but I definitely should not be eating all of these by myself.
[***]
Mm, marry him!
-Stop. -I'm not joking!
He just made these?
I bet he has a good sourdough starter, too.
You should ask him.
Well, since I managed to leave without being rude,
I don't have to apologize to him again,
so I don't have to see him again.
-[inhales deeply] -So, let's just...
change the subject, please,
and you can tell me what's going on here.
There's a lot of bills.
Yup.
Trying to decide which ones to pay first.
[sighs]
Boy, the competition is tough.
Maybe we were just too late to the game?
You two in here sharing secrets?
Always!
Here, compliments of Archer Donovan--
the wildly irritating man staying at Billsboro House.
Wildly irritating, but attractive, I bet?
That just adds to the irritation.
[laughs] Here you go.
[shivering] Whoo!
[Archer] Yeah, then you just tap here
to stitch the video.
[Janet] Wow.
It's as easy as that.
[Ed] And so just anyone can see it?
[Archer] Well, yeah, everyone who's on the app.
And then it's posted.
Maggie!
Hi.
Hey, sweetie!
I wasn't expecting to see you here.
I had some questions about the cell phone,
and I remember you said
that Archer here is a technology king.
Well, I prefer the term "technology wizard".
I'll also accept "technology shaman".
Ed! Tell her your idea.
Okay, um...
I am going to shoot some videos to promote the farm.
Hmm!
I think maybe we should be getting back.
All right!
Maggie, do you have youth choir tonight?
I do, but don't remind me.
-See you soon. -Bye.
Bye, Dad. Mwah.
-Look who's here! -Uh... do you want to join me?
Uh...
[sighs reluctantly] Fine.
[Archer chuckles awkwardly]
I'm sorry to sound negative about the choir.
I love the kids, but...
It's been a challenge?
[sighs] I'm not a good teacher.
I'm also not good at social media, although...
I'll be my dad's tech support now,
when you leave-- thanks for that.
He really sold me out for mac and cheese?
To be fair, it's really good mac and cheese.
[chuckles]
Look at this guy.
He's gonna go viral.
Should have charged him 10% on all future earnings.
You know, I've been doing this for almost 20 years.
My dad will make one video of a pig sneezing
and get more engagement.
You could change that, you know?
Have you been talking to my manager?
There's something about this whole puzzle
that I don't understand, isn't there?
Yes.
Uh, my career, such as it is,
is ending
because, according to my manager,
I'm an old-fashioned Luddite.
I need more tech, more social media,
and the worst part is...
he's not wrong.
Well, he's not right, either.
There's gotta be a balance.
Not that I can find.
[Janet] We'll see you later, you two!
-Bye. -Bye.
Okay, but seriously,
what is it like to grow up with parents
who love each other like that?
Wonderful.
Cringey.
[laughs]
Safe.
Having a home where I felt protected,
no matter what...
it's the only way I survived
all these years of playing state fairs and coffee shops
and everything in between.
Hmm.
What about you?
Me? No, I-- I don't play state fairs or coffee shops.
You do deflect well, though.
Yeah, that I do.
-[laughs] -Look, it's a long story.
Both my parents are gone now.
I barely have a relationship with my sister,
and she's got two adorable kids that I hardly know.
Well, what's she doing for Christmas?
She's bringing Max and Mia to Aspen.
Does she know you're staying at Billsboro?
No, ma'am.
Well, why don't you send her a photo?
If that house was special to you,
chances are it was special to her, too.
I-- I appreciate it, but--
[clears throat]
I don't think this situation with my sister is repairable,
so...
um...
I gotta get going, but, uh...
um, I'll...
see you soon... I hope?
Sure.
[***]
Huh.
[snapping]
[***]
[text alert chimes]
[Mia] Do you think we'll ever have a tree of our own?
[Max] I don't think so.
Mama doesn't like them.
[***]
[children, off-key, off-time] * Oh, come let us adore Him *
* Christ the Lord *
[forced chuckle]
Well, th-that's closer to it.
Did you hear the difference?
[children agreeing]
Um... Clara and Carlos--
Maggie's friends.
Oh, hi!
-Nice to meet you. -Yeah.
That's our daughter, Lucy, up there.
Are you, um... Archer-- famous cinnamon-roll baker?
I guess I am.
Come by the Trolley Stop sometime-- we'll pay you back
-in ale. -Deal.
Okay, kids, I'll see you next time.
[children] Bye!
They're great.
They are sweet.
-Very sweet. -That they are.
Hi!
-You having fun? -Mwah!
Thanks again.
Bye, Maggie. See you soon.
[Archer] Hey...
so this is the infamous children's choir.
They... sound great.
[chuckles dryly]
You would fail a lie-detector test
before they even hooked it up.
[laughs]
Well...
um... I did it.
I sent this...
to my sister in Aspen.
[Maggie] Oh, that's so wholesome!
What did she say back?
Nothing. She won't respond, but...
I wanted to thank you for encouraging me.
Are you and your sister really that different?
No, we're that much alike.
Oh, well, that'll do it.
It's impossible to overstate how competitive we are.
I'm sorry.
Anyway,
I didn't come here to dump on you.
The choir--
Hmm?
We have a new app
that we're getting ready to release.
It's in beta right now, and I was talking with my team--
No, no. No apps.
Just hear me out.
It helps kids hear and match notes.
You can upload their songs,
and the app will reactively help them sing it correctly.
It's all like a game.
It just teaches them music, Maggie.
There's nothing in there that's gonna become sentient
and take over the world.
It's old-school and technology happily coexisting,
and it would help me a lot to have some young testers.
[abruptly] Yeah, I gotta lock up.
Okay.
I'll guess see you then.
[***]
[grunts in discomfort]
[shivering] Whoo...
...And that was today's fun fact about Christmas trees.
So, remember, when you're ready for a tree,
come on down!
I'm Ed, and this is Ed's Christmas Tree Farm.
Well, what do you think?
Are you selling trees or used cars?
I'm selling my style. My--
What you call it?
My brand!
Who are you?
[laughing]
[phone rings]
Archer?
[ringing]
Hello?
Hey, uh... sorry to call so early.
We live on a farm.
We've been up for two hours already. What's wrong?
Put it on speaker. Speaker.
Oh, just a small issue... I don't have any heat here.
Uh, I swear, I could freeze a polar bear,
it's so cold here,
and I've watched every video I can find online
about furnaces,
but none of them were for this furnace.
So, any suggestions?
Well, son... did you put any wood in there before bed?
[mouthing words]
[Archer] Wood?
Okay...
wood, but--
where is it?
[grunting]
Oh...
okay, so I just
cram it full of logs and light it up,
and I'll be warm again?
No, no. It's not quite that simple.
You see, the trick with fires is you've gotta start small.
Do you have any small pieces of wood laying around
that you could just throw in there?
Maybe some dried bark?
Ooh... yeah!
Okay.
Okay, just give me a second here...
here we go.
[match scratches box]
Okay...
here we go.
Once there's a dozen or two
big logs in there,
you should be good to go.
Yes!
[chortling victoriously]
[grandly] Man has created fire!
[laughing]
Archer, do you have a fireplace at home?
I do.
-Well, how do you start it? -I press a button on a remote.
All right! This is really rolling.
Thank you so much. You saved my life--
[blurting] W-Well, why don't you come over?
Have a hot shower and some food.
[Maggie mouths words]
And then you just tap there to stitch it.
Got it.
Wow, this is a hoot.
Now, just remember the most important rule of all--
"the Internet is forever."
Right. So don't be that guy?
Definitely don't be that guy.
Thank you for breakfast.
Any time.
Oh, and don't forget to say goodbye to Maggie.
She's in the barn.
[chuckles]
[Maggie humming]
* Come December *
* Shining gold and... *
[awkwardly] * Silver *
* Sleighbells ringin' *
* Snowy weather twinkle-- *
[groans]
[***]
Hi, Uncle Archer!
[***]
[Piper] I don't understand.
You said you were staying in town.
I was.
And then...
you gave me that...
and my plans changed.
Why are you here?
You were right.
Hotel trees don't count,
and I realized I was doing the same thing
to my children that--
you know.
Why didn't you call and tell me you were coming?
Look, we can go, if you don't want us here.
I didn't say that...
but I mean, hey, do whatever you want-- you always do.
[children laughing]
[Max] We're all set up!
Hey, guys.
Did you find the bunkbeds?
I'm gonna take the top one tonight.
Tomorrow, we'll switch.
You know,
that's the same room that your mom and I slept in
when we stayed here.
Think you'll be comfortable there?
-Yeah. -Good.
[whispering] Mom?
What if Santa doesn't find us?
There are some concerns
that our change of plans will be confusing for Santa--
that he won't be able to find them.
Oh, well, I actually know
of a place where you can write a letter to Santa,
and I know for a fact they get delivered.
Should we do that? We could go first thing in the morning.
[Piper] Great idea,
but I have a bunch of calls tomorrow morning.
Maybe in the afternoon?
Or I could take them?
-Yes, please! -Yes, please!
[***]
[Janet] When you kids are done writing your letters,
I want you to meet me right over there
because I want to give you each a cherry-wink cookie.
Sound good?
-[both] Yeah! -[laughs] All right.
She's in the barn.
I'll be right back, okay?
So, I mean, we can do different colors, you know.
[Maggie strumming her guitar]
* Been counting down the days *
* Stockings hung by the fireplace *
* Memories so evergreen *
* This Christmas You're all that I need *
You sound great.
What are you doing here?
Uh...
well, at the moment,
my sister is on a work call in my house,
and Max and Mia are just outside with your mom,
writing letters to Santa.
At least it gives you and your sister a chance to--
Aah...
This has never worked out before, okay,
so let's control our expectations.
Whenever we get together,
we always revert back to our old ways,
like we can't break the pattern.
I'm sorry, Archer.
That sounds... toxic.
You have no idea.
Tell me.
Okay.
Buckle up for this one.
[sighs]
Growing up,
once we were old enough to start earning money,
my parents would track
exactly how much money we earned every year,
to the penny.
Was that meant to teach you the value of work or money?
No, no, no.
They wanted us to learn the value
of winning at all costs.
On December 25th, at 12:01 a.m.,
whichever one of us had made the most money for the year
got huge presents...
and the other one
got nothing.
Archer, you were just little kids!
Yeah, but we became little mercenaries.
Anyway...
a couple of years ago,
after copious amounts of therapy,
I went no-contact with my father,
and his parting shot--
he did it one last time with his board seat.
It's gonna go to whichever one of us
has the higher net worth
this Christmas morning at 12:01.
Now, Archline has two new apps coming out in the New Year--
one for kids
and one that we're calling "Project Harmonies".
Anyway, if any news leaks about either of them,
my stock is gonna skyrocket
and I'm gonna be worth way more than my sister.
But don't you want the board seat?
[***]
Uncle Archer! We brought you a cookie.
Hey, uh, Mia, Max, this is my friend, Maggie.
Hi.
And these are her special little pigs.
We have to be very gentle around them, though,
'cause they startle easily.
Max does, too.
[chuckling]
Hey, how about I trade you
that cookie for...
some blueberries for the pigs?
Yeah!
[oinking agreeably]
What are their names?
Well, this is Johnny and this is June.
Why'd you name them that?
They're named after
one of the greatest country musicians of all time
and-- -...And her husband.
Oh, you're good!
[laughs]
Hey, guys,
you know Maggie actually runs a children's Christmas choir?
We'd have to ask your mom,
but I'm sure you would be welcome there.
Yeah. My goddaughter, Lucy,
would love to be friends with you.
-Yeah. -Yeah?
Yeah, get in there. Look.
Pick up the blueberries over there.
You can't have this. This is mine.
Get over there.
[chuckling]
I thought I saw you here.
Well, you still build a good fire, Maggie.
Mm.
I think you wrote your first song here.
Yeah.
I had such big dreams.
Dreams only die when you stop watering them, kiddo.
Archer wants me to use one of his apps with the kids.
I feel like I'm going to the dark side.
Hey, you remember Grammy's rules about thank-you notes?
Always handwritten, in proper cursive.
[laughing]
She just about keeled over
when you started dotting your "i"s
with those little hearts.
[laughing] Yeah!
You see, the thing is,
what we grow up with is what seems right.
Cursive was right for her.
Me? I was fine with printing, and you--
[chuckling]
It's just like Uncle Henry
and his massive collection of LPs and 45s, right?
CDs were too scary for him.
Are you saying I'm turning into Uncle Henry?
[laughs] No, no.
What I'm saying is,
you grew up in a home where we played a lot of great music,
like Carly Simon and Joni Mitchell
and Linda Ronstadt.
Mm, yeah.
And you learned from them,
but maybe it's time you figure out
how those ladies inspired you
and use it to make something new.
[***]
I'm so stoked you guys
are doing the Cookie Crawl this year.
Hey, anything to get people in here, right?
Speaking of which, we promised Archer an ale, so...
feel free to bring him by sometime.
Yeah, maybe.
[laughs] Okay! What did he do this time?
He wants me to use this app with the kids.
He thinks it will help.
What app?
Yeah, what app?
[***]
[phone ringing]
[Archer] Maggie?
Hi. I'm here with Lucy and she has
a message for you.
[Lucy, blurting] I want to try the app!
Did you get all that?
[Archer] Did you just get outvoted?
Rolled right over me.
Hey, Maggie, this is gonna be fun, okay,
and if it's not, we can stop.
Okay, I trust you.
No, you don't.
No, I don't, but...
I'm trying.
I'll take it.
See you soon.
[claps shut]
[Maggie] I don't hate tech, you know.
It's just everything made with these apps
sounds the same to me.
That's what Lewis wants me to write.
What do you want to write?
I don't know.
I used to dream of writing the next great Christmas song.
It sounds silly, I know, but...
I guess I just want to write something
that will make my fans happy,
my...
my manager happy,
my distributors happy.
I literally want to make everyone happy,
but no one is.
There's this funny thing that we do--
when something's not working, we do it harder.
At work, I tell people,
"Okay, we tried that. It failed.
Now instead of doubling down,
why don't we step back and find a new approach?"
In your case, I don't know--
I-I could be completely wrong, but...
it seems like your career hasn't been working out
the way you want it to,
but you just keep trying harder and harder.
And every step feels further from my heart.
Well, you know what they say--
if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
If you're lost, go back and try a different road.
You saying I should shake things up?
Yeah! Shake things way up.
Do whatever you want.
Just make yourself happy...
and trust me--
everyone else will be right there with you.
Come on.
Okay, and then, if you hit the note--
* Ahh... *
See?
Your avatar advances. Does that make sense?
Yeah!
Okay, now, this option, up here, is really fun.
You see all those people... there?
Those are all of you,
so you get to track each other's progress,
as you all move through the different levels.
You can send each other rewards.
You can give each other virtual high-fives.
[phone rings]
You can even challenge each other to sing-offs!
Pretty cool, hey?
Yeah.
Okay, so you're all gonna have a chance
to play around with it.
If you have any problems using it,
or if you have any ideas for how we can make it better,
write those things down,
and Maggie will let me know about it.
All right, go for it! Have fun.
[chuckles]
[children chatter excitedly]
Hey--
You never stop, do you?
And you never start.
I haven't seen you take one meeting
since I've been here.
No wonder I'm getting the board seat.
[sighs]
We're grabbing takeout on the way home.
What would you like?
[Archer] Um, you know what?
I-I'll just have whatever you're having, okay,
and, uh, I'll meet up with you later?
Okay.
-'Kay. -Max. Mia.
Let's go.
[Archer] Hey, everything okay?
That was my manager.
He said he can't book me anywhere big enough
to justify keeping me on, so...
he dropped me.
It's over.
My career's over.
Come here.
It's gonna be okay.
So, what are you gonna do?
Well, I've worked through stage one--
panic.
And, last night,
I embraced stage two-- crying and self-pity...
and now I'm firmly in stage three--
pretending I don't care
and envisioning walking away.
But you love making music.
I know, but I feel like
I'm in this dysfunctional relationship with it.
Maybe Archer's right.
Maybe I need to... shake things up.
Do things my way.
Oh, speaking of Archer,
and you didn't hear this from me,
but your choir's getting better already.
Really?
Yes, I was listening to them a little bit last night,
and they're getting good.
[laughs]
And more importantly, they're jazzed about it!
Lucy's keeping a list of all the new features she wants.
Of course she is.
Oh, are you guys coming to the Wrap-a-thon?
Can't! We booked a party tonight.
Well, that's good, though.
Yeah, but you know, if you want help,
I bet Archer's free.
-[groaning lightly] -What?
What now?
[laughs]
Okay, you know what? We're gonna go from the top.
This guy supports your career.
I know.
-He's employed. -[Maggie snorts]
He is. He's smart, he has great eyes.
All true.
And he calls you on your nonsense.
I mean, I can see why you're not attracted to him.
He's so not your type.
Yeah, he really is all those things, isn't he?
And he bakes.
Oh! I forgot about the baking.
That's it. I'm inviting him.
[laughing] That was easy!
[***]
[doorbell ringing]
-Hi. -Hey, guys!
Come on in.
You must be Piper.
I'm so glad to meet you.
Max and Mia, welcome back.
The little piglets missed you.
[all laughing]
Let me take your coats.
So, uh, what do we have here, son?
You want to tell them what kind of cupcakes we made?
Reindeer.
I put on the antlers.
Well, look how clever you two are!
[chuckles] Come on in.
We're setting up in the dining room.
[***]
-Hey, guys! -Max, you can sit here.
Mia.
Oh, good timing.
So... this is the famous Wrap-a-thon.
I've been looking forward to this.
What are we wrapping here?
Well, every year, the businesses downtown
do a Cookie Crawl.
It's like a pub crawl, but for the whole family.
We did this. Do you remember?
Yeah, I do!
You guys are gonna love it.
[Maggie] It's like an assembly line,
so Mom and I make up the little boxes,
and Mia and Max,
you can put something inside each one.
Like, one of the Christmas cookies--
-Mm-hmm. -Or... a little pig ornament.
[Maggie] Ed closes the boxes,
and Piper and Archer,
you can decorate them with a ribbon or a bow.
Let's do this.
-All right. -All right.
Okay!
[***]
* It's the most wonderful time of the year... *
Oh, I need some more of these.
* ...Cocoa on kettles *
* Laughter and cheer *
* Jingle-jangle It's Christmas-time again... *
That's going into the box.
Uh-uh. Nope. Not this one.
* ...Giddy up, giddy up off we go *
* To the Jolly Town Parade *
* Giddy up, giddy up in the snow... *
Here's one.
* ...To the jingle-jangle on an open sleigh--oh! *
* It's my favorite time of year *
* On a sleigh ride together in the frosty air *
* Singing jingle-jangle it's Christmas time again *
Archer?
[forcefully] Archer.
Mm-hmm?
I wanna do ribbons for a while. Can we switch?
Yeah.
Great!
[***]
[chuckles]
[Archer] Thanks for having us all over.
It was fun.
And thanks
for noticing what was happening with my sister and I.
Happy to help.
Hey, fun fact.
I played my first for-real solo gig in here.
Really?
Yeah! [laughs]
When it's not Christmas,
they have a little stage set up here--
just big enough for one person.
They do open-mic nights, comedy, poetry slams.
I was so nervous.
Okay, um...
I was up late last night, thinking,
and I'm gonna ask you this gently--
you can say no whenever you want.
Okay.
You remember I mentioned the other app we're developing--
"Project Harmonies"?
It's basically the online equivalent of that,
but... globally.
[chuckles]
I don't understand.
It lets people put on a show,
save the live performance, make it downloadable,
and monetize it--
and we added in these augmented-reality features,
so users can watch the show,
but it looks like it's taking place
in a different location.
I've been trying to figure out what the hook is,
what would make it different--
and you told me.
I did? [laughs]
What did I say?
Singer-songwriters. Poets.
Original content only.
It's like...
the latest in technology
meets
good, old-fashioned talent.
I need
someone to help me.
Maybe...
a musician who still believes that talent matters?
[chuckles]
I did say that, didn't I?
Yeah, you did.
Can I think about it?
Of course.
If she agrees, we're gonna keep it simple--
15, 20 minutes each,
12 acts, one after the other.
You think we can get this done by Christmas Eve?
[TJ] Uh, it would be...
tight, like, wildly tight,
but I love the direction.
It's, um, it's authentic.
Can you get marketing to start playing with it?
Just sent the email,
I already know some acts,
and I set the meeting with Dev in 10.
You're so good.
It's almost embarrassing.
-[door opens] -[Piper] Max! Mia?
I gotta go. Keep me posted.
Hey.
Oh, the kids are outside,
looking for more pinecones to hang on the tree.
Oh.
They're having a great time here.
Thanks again for letting us stay.
Of course.
So, is something on your mind?
Okay, so I guess I didn't call in advance
because
I was scared you'd say no.
You're my sister.
You're always welcome.
I'll try to be better about letting you know that.
Me too.
* O, Christmas tree O, Christmas tree *
* How lovely are thy branches *
[laughs] And that's our time!
You guys are amazing.
Thank you so much for your hard work.
We'll see you next time.
Oh, and remember to give your suggestions
to that handsome-looking guy back there.
Who? What?
[Maggie laughing]
Hey...
all right, so, what did you guys think?
Was that cool?
-Really? -It's so fun.
I'm so glad.
You guys are singing so well,
I think you could be on stage.
[Mia] This... is a pinecone.
[Archer] No! That's not a pinecone.
That's a flying sparkle-dog.
I'm surprised you kids don't know this stuff.
I called in dinner,
but they're busy, so it'll take an hour,
but look what I found...
It's the Fortunopolis game we played.
I think it's the same one.
Look! There's the piece of tape we put on the lid
when Uncle Archer broke it.
Why did you break it?
Because your mom beat me,
and I was a terribly sore loser.
Hey, why don't we play
while we wait for
-the pizza to get here? -Yeah!
[***]
[Archer blows air tensely]
[Ed] Some people with micro pigs
swear that they are very smart
and make for great pets,
but not me, though.
No, sir!
They're just livestock to me.
[June squeals]
No, oh, no, no, sweetheart. You're not livestock to me.
You're my little precious one. Yes, you are!
[smooching]
Oh, yes, you are!
-Ed! -Oh!
[Janet] Come wash up for dinner!
Okay! Well, that sounds like the dinner bell.
Until next time, I'm Ed.
Oh, it's okay.
-[squeals] -You're okay. You're okay.
There you go!
You want me to publish it?
No, no, no. I need to add some more hashtags
and make sure the metadata is right.
Really, who are you?
"240k followers."
Um, does that stand for "thousand"?
I stand corrected.
You are amazing.
[***]
[clacking]
Ha!
As the sole owner of all four shipping ports,
you owe me $200.
Piper, can we just stop and have some dinner now?
No. I'm winning. Pay up.
Okay.
Here's your money.
Can we stop now?
Some things never change.
You just can't stand to see me win.
[deep breath] Okay.
Here is...
all of my play money.
It's yours now.
You're rich. You win. I don't care.
Can we just eat, please?
No. You don't get to just walk away.
It doesn't work like that!
Do you even hear yourself?
[Mia] Uncle Archer!
Please don't go.
I'm sorry.
[***]
[doorbell rings]
Archer? Hi.
Hi.
We're just about to have some pie.
Come on in. Join us.
-Oh-- thanks. -Yeah. Come on.
We're just in the kitchen.
Hey.
Um, uh...
I was-- um...
We're glad you dropped by.
Maybe you can help settle a little debate
that we've been having.
See...
I think that if Ed
continues to eat my pies at such an alarming rate,
that I have every right to hide them,
but my daughter
thinks that I'm being controlling.
I didn't say "controlling"!
Well, it was implied.
It was, honey.
Hey! Whose side are you on?
Ooh, good point.
-[laughter] -So?
What's your opinion?
Um...
my-- my opinion
is that a video
of Ed learning to bake his own pies
would probably go viral.
Archer,
Maggie tells us
that you're going to do some big concert
on Christmas Eve?
Well, not big.
It's just a beta run of our new app.
And you want our Maggie to help you?
No.
I want Maggie to headline it, if she will agree to it.
Ooh...
[Janet chuckles]
Archer, has Maggie told you
about her Uncle Henry
and his humongous collection of LPs and 45s?
Hmm?
Well... no?
[fumes] Fine! I'll do it.
I'll do it!
You will?
Yes.
[laughs] Amazing.
[Ed] Great. Well, now that that's settled,
um, how about some pie?
I didn't know where to go, so I ended up here.
I think I just wanted to laugh with your family.
[deep breath]
How do I do this?
How do I build a family,
when we revert the moment we see each other?
You find a new way,
'cause as this brilliant guy once told me...
...if what you're doing isn't working,
try something different.
Hmm.
[***]
[footsteps]
You were my big brother.
You were stronger,
faster,
and everyone liked you more.
My entire focus became beating you.
Why?
It was never about the money.
You know that, right?
I know.
I couldn't understand
why you barely talked to him these past years...
...but I think I do now.
I couldn't heal from the damage
while he was... still trying to inflict it.
[sniffles]
I don't know how to do this.
You do, though.
Pipes,
you're raising the two most cooperative kids
I've ever met.
They find common ground on everything.
Yeah.
They're pretty great, huh?
They are, but that's not even my point.
That kind of respect and love between young siblings,
it's not factory-installed equipment.
They learned it from you...
...which means you know what it looks like.
You just have to...
...find a way to gift it to yourself.
So...
lots of therapy?
-Oh, so much therapy! -[laughing]
But... I can be there for you.
Please don't give up on me.
I won't.
[***]
[deep, shaky breath, sighs]
Merry Christmas!
[Archer] TJ's bringing up all the livestream equipment,
so, from a technological point of view,
we're set.
I want you to go last.
Are you okay with that?
Yeah, but the kids sound so good.
I want to give them some of my time.
Is that okay?
Of course.
[notification chimes]
Oh, it's Clara.
She's melting down.
I think it's business stuff.
I'm gonna go help her.
-Okay. -Wanna stop by?
Sure.
And hey, if it's business stuff,
maybe Piper and I could help, too.
[Carlos] We're completely out of options, here.
I think it comes down to competition.
There are already three other microbreweries in town.
[Clara] Maybe we could offer a wider variety,
or... oh, I don't know!
You know,
a smart guy once told me that if something isn't working,
don't keep doing the same thing harder.
Hmm, I wonder who that was?
[Piper] Miss Frosty!
No, it was me.
I know it was you,
but do you remember Miss Frosty?
Yeah, it was one of those little ice-cream joints near us.
They had a few picnic tables, but nothing comfortable,
so everybody got their ice cream and then ate it in the car.
Eventually, they closed.
New owners came in
and made it a place for the whole family.
I get it! Yes!
Those other breweries, they're loud, right--
where guys go after work to watch the game
and yell at the TV.
They're not places for families.
[Carlos gasps]
-We have all that room out back. -Yeah, yeah.
We could put in chairs--
Firepits, movie nights...
-Mm! -Games inside in the winter.
-Oh! -Yeah!
You can even have a draft pull for juices and sodas.
Why is it called "Trolley Stop"?
Oh, um, years ago, there was a trolley.
Bring it back.
Find some old jitney for sale.
Rehab it.
A few nights a week, it makes the rounds in town.
Anyone coming here--
[together] ...rides for free!
Yes! The kids would love it,
the adults wouldn't have to worry about driving home...
Brilliant.
[laughing]
You two are some kind of dream team.
-Thank you. -Yeah.
[Clara] Thank you.
[Ed] And now, be sure to tune in on Christmas Eve,
and watch my baby girl sing.
Until then, I'm Ed,
signing out
after another successful Christmas Cookie Crawl!
Ho, ho, ho!
[***]
[phone rings]
[ringing]
TJ. What's up?
Can you talk freely?
Nope.
Okay, then listen.
Do you know someone out there named Ed?
Sure.
Well, he just posted a video talking about how he can't wait
to hear his daughter sing live on Christmas Eve,
encouraging everyone
to tune in.
Uh-huh.
-[phone chimes] -Then, a whole bunch
of hashtags showing gratitude to you, Archline,
and you guessed it, your new software.
Mm-hmm.
[TJ] The good news, I guess,
-[phone chimes] -...is the stock is soaring,
your net worth has never been higher,
and we were gonna announce in a week anyways,
so whatever reason you had to delay
is no longer in play.
Okay, got it. Thanks.
Hey. I can explain.
That's why you've been so nice.
What?
You're making more than me this year.
You're getting the board seat,
and you knew it the entire time!
No.
Kids! Pack up!
We're leaving.
Piper.
Pi-- Piper!
[grunts]
Pipes, listen to me.
This was leaked.
I deliberately delayed any announcement
until the New Year so that you could have the seat.
I am not your charity.
Take the seat.
It's yours.
It means more to you than it does to me.
No. I need to win it fair and square.
What's fair about this?
Let's go. In the car!
I don't want to go.
[Mia] I want to stay, too.
[***]
Are you sure I can't get you anything?
No, I'm fine. Thanks.
[Ed] I put the information about the concert out there.
[sighs] I mean, I was that guy, wasn't I?
A little bit, yeah, but it's okay, really.
[Ed] I am so sorry, Archer.
How much is this gonna hurt your business?
Oh, my business is fine.
It's my relationship with my sister.
I'm sure you've noticed the competitiveness?
-Mm-hmm. -Yeah.
At the end of the day, I knew I was taking a risk,
but I decided to help Maggie.
But you shouldn't have to choose, son.
Family is family--
whether you're born in it or you find it on your own.
Well, it's bedtime for farmers.
Mm-hmm!
[groans] Oh! Big storm coming in.
I can feel it in my bones.
You be careful when you drive home.
-I will. -Goodnight.
-Goodnight.
Tell me something good.
Well, um, I wrote a Christmas song,
and I think it's...
not bad.
I may play it tomorrow.
Yeah?
That's great.
I'm proud of you.
Um, hey... I have a question.
If technology is so great,
why can't they get the icing to cover the entire Pop-Tart?
[laughing]
Don't make me laugh, Maggie McKenzie.
I'm trying to be sad right now.
You're kinda ruining it.
[***]
[phone ringing]
[stops playing]
[ringing]
Lewis?
Wait.
What are you trying to say?
[***]
Okay.
That's great. Thanks.
Okay.
All right, so how's the feed?
Uh, no problems that we couldn't solve.
Heavy traffic on the servers but so far, so good.
Maggie's up in about an hour.
Great.
[background chatter and bustle, indistinct]
What's wrong?
[Ed] Maggie's still at the farm. She's not coming.
[kills engine]
[***]
[sighs heavily]
[door rattles]
[***]
Hey.
Wanna tell me about it?
[sighs]
Um...
I've been talking with Lewis.
He heard about the concert tonight,
so I played him my Christmas song.
He thinks it's a winner.
Okay.
But he doesn't want me to play it tonight.
He wants me to get back in the studio
and release it next November.
I see.
He wants to rep me again, Archer...
...and he doesn't want me to showcase your product for free.
He thinks you're...
using me, I guess?
Well...
I'm glad he believes in you again.
[scoffs]
Good luck.
You're leaving?
Just like that?
What do you want me to say, Maggie?
I'm not using you.
I made you the headliner!
I know, but Lewis thinks--
Lewis?
Lewis dropped you,
and then as soon as he heard about this-- as soon as
he thought he could make a profit off of you, he's back?
Look, I don't know.
Maybe it'll all work out this time.
Maybe if you just keep doing what you've always done,
but do it a little harder, everything will turn out well.
You don't understand how hard this business is.
I'm scared that--
What if--
What if this is as good as it's ever gonna get for me?
[exhales]
What if you go back and work with that guy,
and you never find out?
[***]
[doors close]
[***]
Okay, kids... um, Maggie's a bit delayed,
but I'm gonna help you with your warmup,
but I need you onstage, right now.
Go on. Up on stage. That's it.
[Ed] Thanks for trying.
Ahem.
Come on, hurry! They're already warming up.
Hey! Hi.
[***]
What?
[baffled gasp]
I was so terrified of this board position.
It's too much for me.
I'm glad it's going to you.
It's not going to me.
You're perfect for it.
That's why I was delaying any announcement.
That day, at the brewery,
it felt like a glimpse of what you and I could do
if we were on the same team for once.
[***]
What?
A Donovan has to sit on the Board of Directors,
or else the entire board is dismissed, right?
Right.
There's no rule that says
two Donovans can't sit on the board.
I like where this is going.
Let's split the job, 50/50.
Well, what if the board disagrees?
Then neither of us takes the position,
the board is dismissed, and we start over.
I love it when you play hardball.
But listen, Pipes--
you and me...
we're gonna have to fight to make this work.
That means, no more running away...
for either of us.
Deal?
Deal.
[relieved sigh]
So, is everything set here?
One major hiccup--
Maggie's not coming.
-What are you talking about? -She got a call
from her old manager and-- -No, I mean--
what are you talking about?
She's already here.
[***]
Wha...?
Oh!
[Janet] Good luck, honey.
Hi, everyone.
Thanks for coming out on such a stormy night.
A little housekeeping-- this is TJ over here,
with the camera.
Please stay out of his way and off stage.
Otherwise,
sing along, dance, enjoy yourselves,
and feel free to use Archer's app
to interact with the performance.
If you haven't downloaded it yet,
now is the time.
By the way, I approve.
Of what?
Of you and Maggie together.
I'm just going on record.
-Noted. -We have 15 minutes to perform.
The kids will go up first,
and if we have enough time,
I might do a song.
[applause]
So get comfortable.
Thank you to Archer and his team.
Everything has gone perfectly so far,
and I'm sure everything is gonna stay that way.
[whoosh]
[crowd murmuring]
What happened?
[murmuring continues]
[Archer] Okay, uh... it's okay, everybody.
How about, um, let's all take out our phones
and use our flashlights?
Everybody? Can I get-- Can I get your attention
over here, please?
Everybody, can I--
can I have your attention, please, over here?
[whistles loudly]
[Piper shouts] Everybody!
[silence falls]
Please listen to my brother!
Thank you.
Okay, so we've got 11 minutes to fix this.
This is upstate New York.
I know you all have generators,
so if anyone thinks that they can go home,
grab yours, and bring it here in a couple of minutes,
please, do that, okay?
Uh, TJ, do we have enough power to run the broadcast?
Uh, probably,
but not enough to run lights, too.
Okay. Okay.
Ed is gonna be your point-person for the generators.
We also need you to find any candle
that you can get your hands on,
and get it up on that stage, okay?
My sister, Piper, will be in charge of that.
Thank you. I know we can do this.
You're amazing! Let's go.
[***]
[bustle, indistinct]
Thank you...
and I'm sorry.
[generators chugging]
[***]
Five seconds, everyone.
[***]
Good evening,
and Happy Christmas Eve
to all our friends around the world.
I'm Maggie McKenzie,
and I'll be bringing you the final performance
of the night.
We lost power, literally, 11 minutes ago, uh,
but thanks to our friends and family,
we managed this high-tech concert...
[children] * We wish you a Merry Christmas *
* And a Happy New Year *
-[applauding] -[cheering]
[***]
Okay. We have a couple of minutes left.
Enough time for me to do one song.
[tuning chords]
[***]
I have a lot of songs, as some of you may know,
but Christmas is a time of surprises,
and tonight... here's yours.
[exhales]
* Wrap my arms around you like a ribbon *
* Hold you close *
* You're the one thing I've been missin' *
* I remember this *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift *
* 'Tis the season *
* Come December *
* Shining gold and silver *
* Sleighbells ringin' *
* Snowy weather *
* Twinkle lights that shimmer *
* Been counting down the days *
* Stockings hung by the fireplace *
* Memories so evergreen *
* This Christmas you're all that I need *
* Wrap my arms around you like a ribbon *
* Hold you close *
* You're the one thing I've been missin' *
* I remember this *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift *
* And so I wrap my arms around you like a ribbon *
* This moment's the best thing I've been given *
* I remember this *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift *
* Wrap my arms around you like a ribbon *
* Hold you close *
* You're the one thing I've been missin' *
* I remember this *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift *
* Wrap my arms around you like a ribbon *
* This moment's the best thing I've been given *
* I remember this *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift... *
* Ohh... *
* Oh *
* It's a gift *
* It's a gift... *
* Oh, to be here with you is a gift *
[cheering and applauding]
[Ed] That's my girl!
[laughs]
Merry Christmas,
Happy Holidays,
and a Happy New Year
filled with love and peace.
Goodnight!
[applauding]
[mouths words]
And we're out!
Thank you so much, everyone!
[laughing]
Wow.
I called Lewis back.
Oh, and what'd you tell him?
I said, "No, thanks.
I'm gonna shake things up."
Mind if I come along for the ride?
I was hoping you'd ask.
[***]