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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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The one thing human beings want

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is to be loved.

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We make…

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great structures, humanity does,

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and we go to the moon,

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and we make poetry,
and science, and all that we do

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is to be loved.

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We all want

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that… To be loved.

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IN CHILE THEY TORTURE, RAPE, KILL

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How scary.

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This is the poster.

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Team, get ready.

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-Good luck.
-Thank you.

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Break a leg!

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I always felt, like,

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alone, like… not enough.

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When I'd go to school,

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I'd sing a song,

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and I'd have everyone's attention,
the whole class, the teacher,

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and they'd applaud for me.

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They loved me,
they all wanted to be my friends.

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And if I add hand gestures to this song,

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I'll be like their…

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their fool, you know? Like their clown.

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But they loved me more, they saw me more.

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It's my first Latin Grammy.

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And then I'd go home,

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and everything was the opposite.
I was invisible.

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I didn't matter.

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So,

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I pushed myself my whole life
to prove that I was enough,

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and I also got used to doing
outstanding things

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to be loved.

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So people would love me.

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My love was true

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I really loved you

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In spite of your silence

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I loved you more

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A kiss on the train

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Was suddenly so violent

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Sometimes so wild

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I'm desperate…

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Joelito's birthday was the 10th.
We were in the pool all day.

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We had a barbecue.

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It went late. It was dark
and we were still in the pool.

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How delicious.

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We grilled pizza and rolls,
and we sat there…

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How nice.

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-Do I look good?
-Yes.

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-Yes.
-Look.

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YOU WILL BE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FLOWER 2021

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To tell you this story,
I have to tell you the whole thing.

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We all lived with my grandma.

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My parents,

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my sister, and I,

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and my uncle,

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and his family.

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We all lived here.

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My grandma was a singer and composer.

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She wrote boleros.

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She told me they called her
"The Queen of Bolero" in her time.

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She taught me to sing and…

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she'd put on music and we'd sing together
and she'd play guitar.

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She taught me to, like,

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to do stage shows, to stand up straight.

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To do all this stuff.

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For example, I wanted to be a composer.

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That came from her,
because she wrote her own songs.

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Her writing her own songs

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was important to me

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'cause not all women
wrote their own songs.

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Women, especially during that time,

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were more in a role of playing the songs.

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And my grandma
did write her own songs, right?

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So, I wanted to do that too.

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I like to bring my grandma flowers.

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She liked that.
In fact, she always came to the cemetery

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and brought flowers to her mom,
to her husband…

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and I'd always come with her.

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"Don't get married.
Say no to men. Men are bad."

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"Love doesn't exist.
Look for someone with money."

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My grandma and her advice.
She was really funny.

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My grandma would always tell me

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that I had to…

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get out of this neighborhood.

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For her that was the best thing
that could happen to me in life.

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I think it had to do

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with the suffering and violence
that existed

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in our family, too.

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Then we moved. We went to live

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a bit more downhill, in Gómez Carreño.

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It was my parents' first apartment

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as husband and wife.

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It was one of those…
those government facilities.

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I felt like they were happy
because they had

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their little home,
like they were starting their family.

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I have this strong memory
of them buying a boom box.

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When it arrived, we opened it,

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and it smelled like plastic, like new.

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And we turned off the lights,

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and they put the radio on really loud
to listen to music.

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Us four were seated.

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All you could see was
the little red light on the radio,

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and us four were seated like…

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just listening to music on our new radio.

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A beautiful memory.

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What is that?

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Baby clothes.

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Are you having a baby?

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-Congratulations.
-Thanks so much.

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-Me too.
-I know. It's the same baby.

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Under the bed is where the spider dance

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is held…

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It smells like shit.

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I need to take out the trash.

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Hello.

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The tour begins today.

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I'm three months pregnant.

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I feel…

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huge.

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I've never felt so… giant.

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And I'm super excited.

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I'm going to get on the bus.

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I'm in Los Angeles,
and we're going to Seattle.

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So… that's it.

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This concert is my twenty--

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No. Which concert is this?

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Seventeen, I think? 18?

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Well,

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I still have ten left.

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Don't bother me

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I feel good.

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Like, I feel alive again,
singing and everything.

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But it's super different while pregnant.

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I mean, managing both things.

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It's something I wanted so much,
being pregnant.

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We did IVF,

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and were successful on our second try.

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We were ready to try a third time,

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even though it's really tough,
really tough emotionally.

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And I believe
I'll keep doing my things with my baby.

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I'll do it all the same way.

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I don't want to leave him in his crib.

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I don't care what they say,
I'll be with him.

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All the time.

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…and hummingbirds fly around

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Sunflowers sparkle

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And seeds rain down

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I've waited so long for you

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And I'll take care of you…

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My intuition is telling me now
that I'm going to be super creative.

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I mean, I've woken up working,

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and the next day I wake up
as if nothing has happened.

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Like, getting up early,

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or not sleeping because I'm caring
for the baby I so sought for and wanted,

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I think that will be… beautiful.

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Orchid hair…

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I was terrified of this wall as a child
because my mom traumatized me.

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She told me a story about a kid
who ran through here

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and smashed into the wall and died.

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My mom and her methods so I wouldn't run.

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That's how I was educated.

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In that building there,
where we came from,

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that's where I had my first tongue kiss.

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With tongue.

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That's where I'd sit and write songs.

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Right there. All afternoon.

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I strove to be a songwriter.

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I remember that
I'd try to make a song out of everything.

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I mean, any situation I was in.
If I liked someone or…

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I don't know. Anything.
I'd try to make it a song.

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I remember there was
no internet during that time,

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so I had a notebook where I'd write

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all the words that rhymed.

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So when I needed,
when running out of ideas,

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I'd be like, "I need something
that rhymes with this,"

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and the rhyme would appear.

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My parents separated
when I was seven years old.

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That was a turning point. My father left.

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My mom had a lot of financial problems,
she got sick.

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She was doing her thing, I think,
trying to live… her own life.

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That tree is gorgeous.

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We went to the hillside every day,
and we'd collect these white, dry flowers.

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We'd take a ton of flowers.

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My mom would paint them,
and we'd make bouquets and sell them.

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We had fun with my sister.

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It was like a game for us,
going to collect things from the hill,

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and that turned into an income in the end.

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I remember one time, I found five lucas

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on the ground,
and I put my foot like this…

194
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My heart was beating like this…

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So, I kept the five lucas. I took them.

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Look, the story with my dad…

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They separated and started fighting
about who would keep us.

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I remember feeling like a bargaining chip,

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because they were fighting
about who would stay,

200
00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:50,097
but I didn't really feel like
either wanted to stay with us.

201
00:14:50,180 --> 00:14:51,849
It was a fight between them.

202
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When he loses custody of his daughters,

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he leaves. He decides to leave.
To disappear… completely.

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Both physically and financially.

205
00:15:10,951 --> 00:15:13,162
My mom was always looking for my dad.

206
00:15:13,245 --> 00:15:15,247
My mom would send us out, saying,

207
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"Knock on that door,
that's where your dad lives."

208
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:21,503
And we'd knock and they'd say,
"No, not here." Things like that.

209
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Years looking for him.

210
00:15:25,799 --> 00:15:27,968
In reality, it was tedious for me,

211
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it was going back to this place,
knock, walk.

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00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:34,558
It was hot, I was hungry,
and I had to look for Dad.

213
00:15:34,642 --> 00:15:36,226
So I didn't want to look for him.

214
00:15:37,269 --> 00:15:39,939
Until one day,
I was already living with my grandma,

215
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I was like 17 or 18… I was 17.

216
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I called him…

217
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and… he hung up on me.

218
00:15:51,075 --> 00:15:53,744
Then I tried to call again,
and he hung up again,

219
00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:57,039
until I finally said,
"Dad, I don't want anything from you."

220
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,333
"I don't want money."

221
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,252
"I just want to know you."

222
00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:05,506
He hung up on me.

223
00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:12,096
Let's go! Up! Ready?

224
00:16:21,855 --> 00:16:26,902
I used to walk with the shadows

225
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,238
Waiting

226
00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,323
Waiting for you

227
00:16:32,449 --> 00:16:37,079
Sometimes I played with the waves

228
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,999
I'd ask them

229
00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:42,710
"Where did he go?"

230
00:16:43,419 --> 00:16:47,756
And while my eyelashes danced

231
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:53,762
The spiders were climbing me

232
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:58,350
With my little finger
I covered the sun

233
00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:02,938
While my heart drowned…

234
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,190
How's that? Get up!

235
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:09,236
Like a broken spring

236
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:14,283
I'm split in half

237
00:17:15,993 --> 00:17:19,955
Even today, I feel alone

238
00:17:20,581 --> 00:17:22,750
Searching in thousands

239
00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:25,335
Searching in people

240
00:17:25,919 --> 00:17:27,921
Searching in men

241
00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:31,050
In so many men

242
00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:35,804
Your humanity, your paternity…

243
00:17:41,268 --> 00:17:44,646
Non, rien de rien

244
00:17:45,773 --> 00:17:49,318
Non, je ne regrette rien

245
00:17:50,986 --> 00:17:53,614
Ni le bien…

246
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:58,285
-You sing great. Sounds great.
-Thank you!

247
00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,455
I should do this for a living.

248
00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:04,458
…ni le mal

249
00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:06,752
Tout ça m'est bien égal…

250
00:18:06,835 --> 00:18:07,836
We're in Las Vegas.

251
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,631
You remind me of someone

252
00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,425
With the way you dance

253
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:16,345
What is it about your gaze?

254
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:19,181
I feel like everything burns me

255
00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:22,518
I thought about you all afternoon

256
00:18:22,601 --> 00:18:25,312
Anywhere you go, I see you

257
00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:28,565
I want to kiss your lips

258
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:30,275
It's just that I want to touch you…

259
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:33,445
Wait until 8:30. I'll tell you then.

260
00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:35,614
Know what? Ready? Prepared?

261
00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:37,908
-Ready. Yes.
-Juan Carlos, shot. Audio.

262
00:18:37,991 --> 00:18:41,495
-Okay. We're good. Rolling.
-Perfect. Three… two, one.

263
00:18:41,578 --> 00:18:43,372
Mon Laferte.

264
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:48,627
One of the… most nominated women
in these Latin Grammys.

265
00:18:48,710 --> 00:18:51,588
I'm nominated for Regional Mexican Song.

266
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,715
Don't even ask me the question.

267
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,551
-Just stamp me.
-Exactly.

268
00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:57,636
"What else? I represent them."

269
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:09,815
Nancy, about the Chile show,

270
00:19:11,775 --> 00:19:15,779
I think it would be best
to go there for the summer,

271
00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:19,158
because if you guys want me to go…

272
00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:23,328
it'd be best in summer.

273
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:26,915
But what I need is a 100% confirmation,

274
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:31,211
with exact dates,
so I can block that date.

275
00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:33,589
How exciting.

276
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,174
I'm feeling…

277
00:19:35,257 --> 00:19:38,468
-I'm feeling the first little kicks, I'm…
-He's moving?

278
00:19:39,094 --> 00:19:40,220
…very excited.

279
00:19:43,098 --> 00:19:44,016
First time.

280
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:46,101
How exciting.

281
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:50,147
My shoe size went up like a whole size.

282
00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:53,901
-Really?
-Yeah, from fluid retention.

283
00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:58,071
My feet… I feel like an empanada.

284
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:03,994
Bye.

285
00:20:08,582 --> 00:20:13,086
What part of "This is Moulin Rouge
and this is mariachi" do they not get?

286
00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:16,215
I don't know.

287
00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:18,300
-I understand…
-I mean, that is Moulin Rouge.

288
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:22,095
-Totally.
-And from day one I've rejected that.

289
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:26,808
I don't want Moulin Rouge
because I'm going Mariachi.

290
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:30,145
Explain this stage design to me.

291
00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:32,231
-We have to change it.
-Of course.

292
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,024
They fucked up.

293
00:20:34,107 --> 00:20:35,651
-Seems like it.
-And?

294
00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:37,319
And they're fixing it now.

295
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:43,450
They called the creative content team
to fix it.

296
00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:36,503
Then my mom got a boyfriend.

297
00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:39,548
An alcoholic guy.

298
00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:43,302
Violent.

299
00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:47,764
He lived there with us for seven years.

300
00:21:47,848 --> 00:21:50,350
We had a lot of financial problems. A lot.

301
00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:56,023
It was not a family environment.

302
00:21:58,025 --> 00:22:00,360
I mean, it's also important

303
00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:05,824
to understand that poverty brings
many problems along with it.

304
00:22:09,786 --> 00:22:15,083
I think my mother
was trying to survive day by day,

305
00:22:15,667 --> 00:22:18,670
to not be so sick,
to have enough to be able to eat.

306
00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:22,716
To come up with ways for us to have money.

307
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:28,055
And she got into a relationship

308
00:22:28,138 --> 00:22:30,974
that was toxic, violent,
that she couldn't leave.

309
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:44,654
When you're a child and you're poor,

310
00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:47,532
I don't think there's much time to ponder.

311
00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:48,992
It's just day-to-day.

312
00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:51,912
We'll finish today
and see what comes the next.

313
00:22:59,795 --> 00:23:00,921
It was hard.

314
00:23:02,130 --> 00:23:05,050
He also abused me.
A lot of things happened.

315
00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:08,095
I didn't tell my mom.

316
00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:12,599
I didn't understand what was happening.

317
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,311
I didn't understand.

318
00:23:19,523 --> 00:23:21,024
Yeah, that's it.

319
00:23:22,859 --> 00:23:25,570
It's also not something
I've talked about much.

320
00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:45,841
I felt a lot of rejection
towards my mom during that time.

321
00:23:47,008 --> 00:23:50,011
Even physically,
I couldn't get close to her.

322
00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:56,977
There was a lot of… pain there.
A lot of rage.

323
00:24:00,439 --> 00:24:04,693
How beautiful you look
There in the kitchen

324
00:24:05,485 --> 00:24:10,699
A little slower
With your hands spread apart

325
00:24:11,616 --> 00:24:13,201
When you hugged me

326
00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:16,288
I became your daughter again

327
00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:21,960
And now, in your arms
I make the bitterness a lost cause

328
00:24:23,003 --> 00:24:24,838
Sometimes you'd yell

329
00:24:25,922 --> 00:24:27,883
Sometimes you'd hit

330
00:24:28,717 --> 00:24:30,719
But you, Mommy

331
00:24:31,344 --> 00:24:33,180
You were so alone

332
00:24:34,222 --> 00:24:36,224
And you knew how to give me

333
00:24:37,225 --> 00:24:39,102
What you didn't have

334
00:24:39,895 --> 00:24:44,691
I saw you cry over the lack of bread
To keep us alive

335
00:24:45,984 --> 00:24:49,404
And now that I'm here today

336
00:24:52,199 --> 00:24:56,369
I saw you

337
00:24:58,622 --> 00:25:02,459
So regretful and so tired

338
00:25:04,127 --> 00:25:08,215
From carrying your cross
And in that wounded heart

339
00:25:09,591 --> 00:25:14,012
I have no doubt that you loved me

340
00:25:14,763 --> 00:25:17,974
I saw you…

341
00:25:20,227 --> 00:25:21,269
"Te vi."

342
00:25:21,770 --> 00:25:22,854
"Te vi."

343
00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:29,486
That song is really important to me.

344
00:25:31,947 --> 00:25:34,074
When I showed it to my mom, she said

345
00:25:35,075 --> 00:25:36,743
I didn't have to show it to anyone,

346
00:25:36,826 --> 00:25:39,579
'cause everyone would know
she hit me when I was little.

347
00:25:39,663 --> 00:25:41,665
That she didn't want people to know

348
00:25:42,332 --> 00:25:43,917
because she was so ashamed.

349
00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:47,837
…and you sang to me…

350
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:06,481
It suddenly happened that,

351
00:26:06,565 --> 00:26:11,778
it's still happening that,
I feel kind of trapped,

352
00:26:11,861 --> 00:26:14,489
and there have been a few times

353
00:26:14,573 --> 00:26:18,410
when I start having, like, panic attacks…
like I can't breathe.

354
00:26:19,786 --> 00:26:23,415
Because I feel like motherhood
is a lot of responsibility.

355
00:26:35,260 --> 00:26:37,971
I've been able to connect more
with my mom now.

356
00:26:41,016 --> 00:26:46,438
I'm very close to my family,
but not the type of closeness where…

357
00:26:47,105 --> 00:26:49,316
where we talk every day,

358
00:26:49,399 --> 00:26:53,194
like, "Mom, I want to see you."
I don't know. Like…

359
00:26:55,739 --> 00:27:00,201
We've learned to live with the distance.

360
00:27:16,301 --> 00:27:17,844
No one is perfect.

361
00:27:20,055 --> 00:27:23,058
Moms are imperfect women.

362
00:27:23,141 --> 00:27:24,392
They're human beings.

363
00:27:26,394 --> 00:27:29,439
Whatever it may be… however her…

364
00:27:30,106 --> 00:27:32,108
her way of raising me was,

365
00:27:33,234 --> 00:27:34,986
I'm here, and I'm grateful.

366
00:27:38,198 --> 00:27:39,658
I'm… I'm here.

367
00:27:41,117 --> 00:27:45,038
My dear love

368
00:27:49,584 --> 00:27:53,338
There's truly nothing else

369
00:27:53,922 --> 00:27:55,924
That I can do

370
00:27:58,301 --> 00:28:02,430
You won't change
You won't convince me

371
00:28:03,890 --> 00:28:05,892
That now

372
00:28:06,851 --> 00:28:11,523
Everything will be okay

373
00:28:18,530 --> 00:28:22,701
For how long will you

374
00:28:26,746 --> 00:28:30,959
Keep thinking

375
00:28:33,211 --> 00:28:38,216
That you can play at asking
With nothing to give?

376
00:28:38,758 --> 00:28:40,760
Well, now

377
00:28:41,678 --> 00:28:45,932
I won't be waiting for you

378
00:28:47,684 --> 00:28:54,691
My dear love

379
00:28:55,608 --> 00:29:01,072
If you don't want to come back

380
00:29:03,116 --> 00:29:08,288
Why do you return to look for me
Once again?

381
00:29:08,872 --> 00:29:15,837
Don't ask me to give you one final night

382
00:29:17,881 --> 00:29:23,970
My dear love

383
00:29:25,180 --> 00:29:30,393
It seems easy for you

384
00:29:33,188 --> 00:29:38,485
To leave only to later demand

385
00:29:38,568 --> 00:29:41,821
That I love you

386
00:29:41,905 --> 00:29:44,115
Like I feel nothing

387
00:29:44,199 --> 00:29:50,079
Nothing…

388
00:29:51,206 --> 00:29:56,795
The only place where I feel whole,

389
00:29:57,837 --> 00:30:00,465
like if I were in a deep meditation,

390
00:30:00,548 --> 00:30:01,841
is onstage.

391
00:30:03,009 --> 00:30:06,429
I connect with my feelings, my emotions.

392
00:30:06,930 --> 00:30:12,018
I connect with the people,
and the people connect with that,

393
00:30:12,101 --> 00:30:15,438
and are really honest, as well.

394
00:30:15,939 --> 00:30:20,318
There's, like, this brutal honesty
in performing live music.

395
00:30:21,277 --> 00:30:27,659
My dear love

396
00:30:28,868 --> 00:30:34,207
If you don't want to come back

397
00:30:36,459 --> 00:30:42,006
Why do you return to look for me
Once again?

398
00:30:42,090 --> 00:30:47,637
Don't ask me to give you one final night…

399
00:30:48,972 --> 00:30:53,184
There's this beautiful
but irrational thing, it's ancient, from…

400
00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:57,188
like, our ancestors and…

401
00:30:57,272 --> 00:30:59,399
that thing is living to the fullest.

402
00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:02,443
At times, I truly feel like…

403
00:31:02,527 --> 00:31:04,821
I'm complete in that moment.

404
00:31:05,321 --> 00:31:08,741
I love giving myself completely on stage.

405
00:31:08,825 --> 00:31:12,078
Because that is
living in the moment completely.

406
00:31:12,161 --> 00:31:15,456
…that I loved you

407
00:31:15,540 --> 00:31:17,709
Like I feel nothing

408
00:31:17,792 --> 00:31:23,590
Nothing…

409
00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:45,028
I started participating
in school programs.

410
00:31:45,528 --> 00:31:47,196
And after school,

411
00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:50,033
I went to sing at a sports club.

412
00:31:50,116 --> 00:31:51,534
At that sports club,

413
00:31:51,618 --> 00:31:53,828
I met a man who was a hustler.

414
00:31:54,579 --> 00:31:57,874
He called me on the phone one day
and said, "Hey,"

415
00:31:58,583 --> 00:32:02,086
"they're looking for a singer
to work for them."

416
00:32:02,170 --> 00:32:04,297
"Go audition."

417
00:32:04,380 --> 00:32:06,633
I was 13 years old.

418
00:32:07,175 --> 00:32:08,176
And I got picked.

419
00:32:08,676 --> 00:32:10,678
And he said,

420
00:32:11,346 --> 00:32:15,183
"Well, the payment right now
is 1,500 pesos a day."

421
00:32:15,266 --> 00:32:16,267
WHORES

422
00:32:16,351 --> 00:32:18,311
1,500 Chilean pesos.

423
00:32:18,811 --> 00:32:20,813
I mean, nothing.

424
00:32:23,900 --> 00:32:25,443
I mean, context.

425
00:32:26,110 --> 00:32:28,571
We were eating stale bread then, right?

426
00:32:28,655 --> 00:32:31,616
So that 1,500 pesos was a lot for me.

427
00:32:32,116 --> 00:32:35,119
I loved it. I mean, I'd go out every day

428
00:32:35,203 --> 00:32:37,497
and meet people, and sing and sing.

429
00:32:37,580 --> 00:32:39,582
I never stopped singing.

430
00:32:40,458 --> 00:32:42,460
I had entered middle school,

431
00:32:42,961 --> 00:32:45,505
and I wasn't interested in studying.

432
00:32:45,588 --> 00:32:47,590
I think that was a relief for my mom

433
00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:50,468
because it was her responsibility
to take me,

434
00:32:50,551 --> 00:32:52,053
and watch out for me.

435
00:32:52,136 --> 00:32:56,516
I was very messy, rebellious,

436
00:32:57,475 --> 00:32:59,268
I'd started using drugs.

437
00:33:11,239 --> 00:33:14,242
And I didn't want to.
I didn't want to be in school.

438
00:33:14,325 --> 00:33:16,744
I only wanted to sing,
I already had that job,

439
00:33:16,828 --> 00:33:19,747
so I was doing something else.

440
00:33:19,831 --> 00:33:22,583
No. School wasn't something
that interested me.

441
00:33:23,126 --> 00:33:26,504
And, well, that's when I started… my…

442
00:33:26,587 --> 00:33:29,007
time working, and it never ended.

443
00:33:38,975 --> 00:33:41,602
WHEN I WAS 13,
I HAD A 34-YEAR-OLD BOYFRIEND.

444
00:33:41,686 --> 00:33:43,688
AT FIRST, I WANTED NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM,

445
00:33:43,771 --> 00:33:46,441
BUT HE INSISTED
AND I FINALLY LET HIM KISS ME.

446
00:33:46,524 --> 00:33:48,651
IT LASTED FIVE YEARS AND IT…

447
00:33:56,159 --> 00:34:00,329
…AND IT WAS MY FAULT.

448
00:34:01,205 --> 00:34:04,000
I found this singing job,

449
00:34:04,625 --> 00:34:07,712
and that's where I met an older guy.

450
00:34:07,795 --> 00:34:09,797
He was 21 years older than me.

451
00:34:14,469 --> 00:34:17,388
He got close to me,
saw I was a lonely girl,

452
00:34:18,139 --> 00:34:19,974
and told me that

453
00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:23,269
he would help me,
he'd take away my problems,

454
00:34:23,853 --> 00:34:25,646
that God put him on my path,

455
00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:28,941
that he was my savior,
and that he'd only give me love.

456
00:34:29,025 --> 00:34:33,613
But that I'd have to give up drugs,
I'd have to give up all my vices

457
00:34:33,696 --> 00:34:35,865
in order to surrender to God's love.

458
00:34:37,408 --> 00:34:38,618
And I bought it.

459
00:34:38,701 --> 00:34:41,579
I was a very lonely girl, very lost.

460
00:34:45,124 --> 00:34:47,085
He was also very uneducated.

461
00:34:47,710 --> 00:34:49,837
I taught him to write and to read.

462
00:34:52,632 --> 00:34:53,841
And…

463
00:34:55,343 --> 00:34:59,472
I wound up having a romantic relationship
with him for five years.

464
00:35:00,723 --> 00:35:02,809
He was a married man, with kids.

465
00:35:04,852 --> 00:35:06,104
I saw him like a God.

466
00:35:07,355 --> 00:35:09,941
I respected him, but I was afraid of him.

467
00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:12,735
I did what he told me.

468
00:35:31,546 --> 00:35:34,006
He was a street performer.

469
00:35:34,799 --> 00:35:35,800
A clown.

470
00:35:36,634 --> 00:35:37,593
I'd go with him.

471
00:35:37,677 --> 00:35:40,596
I also sang there sometimes,
I sang on the street.

472
00:35:41,806 --> 00:35:44,267
I sang in bars, at the circus,

473
00:35:44,851 --> 00:35:46,769
I sang in taverns,

474
00:35:47,645 --> 00:35:51,149
at festivals, I traveled all over Chile.

475
00:35:56,445 --> 00:36:00,491
He wound up becoming my "manager."

476
00:36:00,575 --> 00:36:02,952
He took half of all my earnings.

477
00:36:19,802 --> 00:36:22,263
In our family, it was like,

478
00:36:22,847 --> 00:36:24,015
"She quit studying,

479
00:36:25,224 --> 00:36:27,143
but she's working."

480
00:36:27,226 --> 00:36:28,853
"She's bringing home money,

481
00:36:30,146 --> 00:36:32,481
she doesn't do drugs, doesn't drink."

482
00:36:33,649 --> 00:36:35,067
So no one said anything.

483
00:36:35,568 --> 00:36:36,527
They all knew

484
00:36:37,278 --> 00:36:40,781
what was going on,
even though it was a well-known secret.

485
00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:43,451
Because he was my "manager."

486
00:36:44,744 --> 00:36:46,162
So no one said anything.

487
00:36:55,755 --> 00:36:57,965
I remember during that time,

488
00:36:58,049 --> 00:37:01,969
working on the streets
and spending many hours there,

489
00:37:02,470 --> 00:37:05,264
looking at the ground for a coin.

490
00:37:05,348 --> 00:37:07,558
It was sometimes like, "A coin."

491
00:37:07,642 --> 00:37:09,810
I'd always walk around
with a bunch of coins,

492
00:37:09,894 --> 00:37:11,187
I smelled like coins,

493
00:37:11,270 --> 00:37:13,940
because they'd do jokes on the street

494
00:37:14,023 --> 00:37:16,192
and we'd grab the coins, count the coins,

495
00:37:16,734 --> 00:37:21,113
or sometimes I'd sing, and the coins,
it was always like… a lot of coins.

496
00:37:22,073 --> 00:37:25,034
I didn't do anything but work.

497
00:37:25,952 --> 00:37:28,746
And do what he said I had to do.

498
00:37:36,754 --> 00:37:39,006
Yeah, things just happened.

499
00:37:40,424 --> 00:37:43,803
I remember feeling miserable…

500
00:37:45,054 --> 00:37:46,138
…during those years.

501
00:37:46,222 --> 00:37:48,975
WHORE. THIS HAPPENED TO YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE A WHORE

502
00:38:54,290 --> 00:38:56,959
I was very afraid of him.

503
00:38:57,043 --> 00:38:59,545
I was afraid he would kill himself, too,

504
00:38:59,628 --> 00:39:01,964
because he used to say
that he came into this world

505
00:39:02,465 --> 00:39:04,925
to take care of me,
and if we weren't together,

506
00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:06,469
he had nothing left to do

507
00:39:06,969 --> 00:39:08,763
in this world. But that I was free.

508
00:39:08,846 --> 00:39:10,765
I could leave whenever I wanted.

509
00:39:11,307 --> 00:39:13,017
So much manipulation.

510
00:39:13,768 --> 00:39:16,187
He didn't think about me.
He didn't love me.

511
00:39:16,270 --> 00:39:17,271
I think.

512
00:39:29,575 --> 00:39:33,079
I remember going on a trip to Antofagasta,
in the north.

513
00:39:33,621 --> 00:39:34,497
With him.

514
00:39:35,039 --> 00:39:37,416
One of the last trips I took with him.

515
00:39:38,167 --> 00:39:40,002
We went to work in the street.

516
00:39:43,798 --> 00:39:48,469
I met a girl that used to date him

517
00:39:49,011 --> 00:39:50,513
when she was also a minor.

518
00:39:51,305 --> 00:39:53,182
And I talked with her and…

519
00:39:54,058 --> 00:39:58,521
and it opened my eyes,
I understood that what was happening to me

520
00:39:59,105 --> 00:40:00,231
was abuse.

521
00:40:00,314 --> 00:40:03,651
In that moment, I understood.
I didn't understand before then.

522
00:40:03,734 --> 00:40:04,652
I kept on

523
00:40:05,152 --> 00:40:07,655
believing his God story, you know?

524
00:40:08,697 --> 00:40:12,243
And when I realized what he was doing,

525
00:40:12,326 --> 00:40:14,912
that he'd done it several times
with other minor girls…

526
00:40:16,914 --> 00:40:19,333
my eyes were opened on that trip.

527
00:40:23,254 --> 00:40:25,005
And I wanted with all my soul

528
00:40:26,882 --> 00:40:30,678
to achieve something in my life
in order to get out of that,

529
00:40:31,178 --> 00:40:32,930
of being with an older guy,

530
00:40:33,013 --> 00:40:34,723
of that violence.

531
00:40:34,807 --> 00:40:40,187
And… that's how I went to the TV casting,
with a lot of wishful thinking.

532
00:40:41,605 --> 00:40:44,024
I remember telling that guy.

533
00:40:45,025 --> 00:40:49,905
And that day, at the bus terminal, I said,
"This is the last time I'll see you."

534
00:40:49,989 --> 00:40:54,118
I mean, I'd never dared
to say anything to him.

535
00:40:54,201 --> 00:40:56,036
I was terrified of him.

536
00:40:56,537 --> 00:40:58,622
In that moment,
when I said goodbye to him,

537
00:40:58,706 --> 00:41:00,708
I was afraid he'd kill himself.

538
00:41:00,791 --> 00:41:02,960
I thought,
"He's going to kill himself, but…"

539
00:41:03,461 --> 00:41:05,963
"It doesn't matter."
It stopped mattering to me.

540
00:41:06,046 --> 00:41:07,131
And he said, "Okay."

541
00:41:08,966 --> 00:41:09,842
And he left.

542
00:41:10,926 --> 00:41:12,636
And I never heard about him again.

543
00:41:13,345 --> 00:41:15,598
He disappeared completely.

544
00:41:17,224 --> 00:41:18,476
That's very strange.

545
00:41:19,518 --> 00:41:22,188
Never hearing anything about him again.

546
00:41:23,647 --> 00:41:24,523
I had been…

547
00:41:25,149 --> 00:41:27,359
I'd been so afraid of what could happen.

548
00:41:27,860 --> 00:41:28,736
You know?

549
00:41:29,612 --> 00:41:30,905
And nothing happened.

550
00:41:47,004 --> 00:41:48,172
I went to Santiago.

551
00:41:49,256 --> 00:41:51,425
I was chosen for the program.

552
00:41:54,178 --> 00:41:55,804
And for me it was…

553
00:41:56,639 --> 00:41:58,682
It was the chance of a lifetime.

554
00:41:59,308 --> 00:42:00,518
And I had to take it.

555
00:42:00,601 --> 00:42:04,688
I can tell you that she's 19 years old,
is single, and is from Viña del Mar.

556
00:42:04,772 --> 00:42:08,943
Monserrat Bustamante singing
"La media vuelta" by Luis Miguel.

557
00:42:17,117 --> 00:42:22,206
MONSERRAT BUSTAMANTE
SINGER

558
00:42:23,749 --> 00:42:25,334
I took it very seriously.

559
00:42:25,417 --> 00:42:28,128
For me, it was my… everything.

560
00:42:28,921 --> 00:42:31,465
And… it was my salvation.

561
00:42:32,299 --> 00:42:33,342
It changed my life.

562
00:42:33,425 --> 00:42:36,262
Who did we invite to share
with María José, Claudio?

563
00:42:36,345 --> 00:42:38,055
We invited Monserrat Bustamente,

564
00:42:38,138 --> 00:42:40,558
a new, 19-year-old singer.

565
00:42:40,641 --> 00:42:43,269
She's singing with 12-year-old
María José Quintanilla.

566
00:42:43,352 --> 00:42:46,146
They're singing
"La media vuelta" by Javier Solís.

567
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:48,566
I said I had a boyfriend my own age.

568
00:42:49,066 --> 00:42:50,359
I could be myself.

569
00:42:50,442 --> 00:42:53,404
I was happy because
I was doing something I liked,

570
00:42:53,487 --> 00:42:55,281
I could see the light.

571
00:42:55,781 --> 00:42:57,783
Yeah, I felt very happy.

572
00:42:59,535 --> 00:43:02,955
I wanted to win at life
more than winning a program.

573
00:43:05,291 --> 00:43:06,500
To win money.

574
00:43:07,501 --> 00:43:10,379
Right? Like that Argentine singer
who was asked

575
00:43:10,462 --> 00:43:12,798
who taught her to sing and she said,

576
00:43:12,881 --> 00:43:13,799
"Hunger."

577
00:43:15,467 --> 00:43:16,677
I learned to do

578
00:43:17,469 --> 00:43:19,096
all kinds of antics

579
00:43:19,638 --> 00:43:20,764
and to be charming…

580
00:43:22,141 --> 00:43:23,225
out of hunger.

581
00:43:30,649 --> 00:43:33,569
Don Jaime Coloma,
score for Monserrat Bustamante?

582
00:43:34,069 --> 00:43:35,738
-5.8.
-5.8!

583
00:43:35,821 --> 00:43:37,114
JUDGE GIVES A SCORE
TO MONSERRAT

584
00:43:37,197 --> 00:43:39,575
Another thing that also seems complex,
Monserrat,

585
00:43:39,658 --> 00:43:42,494
I believe it's a flaw you sometimes have,

586
00:43:42,578 --> 00:43:45,748
is not that your performance
is excessive, but lacks feeling.

587
00:43:45,831 --> 00:43:49,043
So, giving my all is bad, it's excessive.

588
00:43:49,126 --> 00:43:51,837
-No.
-You know I really give my all on stage.

589
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:53,881
I give it all, my whole heart.

590
00:43:53,964 --> 00:43:55,966
I'm unhappy.
They always give me low scores.

591
00:43:56,050 --> 00:43:58,302
I don't get it.
I look at myself and I'm happy.

592
00:43:58,385 --> 00:43:59,595
I don't get why.

593
00:43:59,678 --> 00:44:02,598
So great that you're able
to self-criticize, Monserrat,

594
00:44:02,681 --> 00:44:05,643
you'll go so far.
Keep that up and you'll go super far.

595
00:44:11,732 --> 00:44:18,739
A SINGER LEAVES THE PROGRAM TODAY

596
00:44:20,866 --> 00:44:24,870
After I started to advance
and do a bit better,

597
00:44:25,579 --> 00:44:28,499
I came with my songs
and wanted to express myself

598
00:44:28,582 --> 00:44:31,085
because they told me,
"You'll record an album

599
00:44:31,168 --> 00:44:34,922
with Jaime Román, the music producer."

600
00:44:35,005 --> 00:44:36,632
They weren't even good,

601
00:44:37,132 --> 00:44:40,427
but he could've at least listened to them,
but, no, he didn't want to.

602
00:44:40,928 --> 00:44:44,765
And it was… horrible.
Every time I saw him, he'd harass me.

603
00:44:44,848 --> 00:44:47,601
I mean, we're talking
the five years that the program was on.

604
00:44:48,435 --> 00:44:51,063
That was the worst thing
that happened to me on Rojo.

605
00:44:51,647 --> 00:44:54,024
Very innocently, I went

606
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:56,735
and spoke with the program director.

607
00:44:56,819 --> 00:45:01,156
For the first time, I told them,
"Look, I'm being harassed by Jaime Román."

608
00:45:01,240 --> 00:45:03,117
"And I want to leave."

609
00:45:03,742 --> 00:45:06,286
And they said to me, "We'll help you."

610
00:45:06,370 --> 00:45:10,624
"We didn't know this about Jaime.
How horrible. We'd never imagine."

611
00:45:11,458 --> 00:45:13,794
And I felt victorious. I said, "Good."

612
00:45:14,336 --> 00:45:16,755
And absolutely nothing happened.

613
00:45:18,966 --> 00:45:19,800
Nothing.

614
00:45:26,932 --> 00:45:31,603
For most of my life, I was always
escaping from something in some way,

615
00:45:32,187 --> 00:45:34,106
or searching for something, maybe.

616
00:45:34,606 --> 00:45:36,442
Right? Since I was little,

617
00:45:36,942 --> 00:45:38,944
I wanted to leave my mom's house.

618
00:45:44,241 --> 00:45:47,244
And that same thing happened.
Suddenly like, "I'm leaving Chile."

619
00:45:47,327 --> 00:45:49,580
"I'm searching for something.
I don't know what."

620
00:45:49,663 --> 00:45:52,666
"I don't know if I'm escaping
or searching or looking for myself."

621
00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:55,461
I saw that many people
started going to Mexico, I was like,

622
00:45:55,961 --> 00:46:00,549
"Okay, if everyone's going there,
I'll have to go see what's there."

623
00:46:15,522 --> 00:46:17,816
This is going to be insane!

624
00:46:17,900 --> 00:46:20,319
To record a movie!

625
00:46:20,402 --> 00:46:21,779
Hell yeah!

626
00:46:25,449 --> 00:46:27,367
-Good evening.
-Good evening.

627
00:46:31,538 --> 00:46:33,373
No!

628
00:46:33,957 --> 00:46:35,375
Is my body showing?

629
00:46:35,459 --> 00:46:37,961
Just from your shoulders up.

630
00:46:38,504 --> 00:46:39,630
And if I do this?

631
00:46:42,424 --> 00:46:43,592
And this?

632
00:46:46,637 --> 00:46:48,263
Are you ready for tomorrow?

633
00:46:48,347 --> 00:46:49,848
Yes. I'm ready.

634
00:46:49,932 --> 00:46:51,725
-Are you?
-Me too.

635
00:46:52,309 --> 00:46:54,061
When I got to Mexico, it was…

636
00:46:54,895 --> 00:46:56,480
ultimate freedom.

637
00:46:57,397 --> 00:47:02,319
In a huge city with 25 million people,
and I didn't know anyone,

638
00:47:02,402 --> 00:47:03,946
and…

639
00:47:04,029 --> 00:47:07,366
and I felt so free
to be who I wanted to be.

640
00:47:08,492 --> 00:47:12,663
There was no past here,
there was no family, no friends.

641
00:47:12,746 --> 00:47:14,373
There was nothing. I was…

642
00:47:14,456 --> 00:47:18,252
I could start a life like I wanted,
from scratch, and…

643
00:47:18,335 --> 00:47:21,672
I also allowed myself to do things
that I hadn't previously.

644
00:47:21,755 --> 00:47:24,633
To start to live and enjoy my…

645
00:47:25,551 --> 00:47:26,635
my youth.

646
00:47:26,718 --> 00:47:29,721
I came to Mexico at 23, 24 years old.

647
00:47:29,805 --> 00:47:33,058
I don't know. I started to live… freely.

648
00:47:40,065 --> 00:47:41,525
Yes. I'm ready.

649
00:47:51,285 --> 00:47:54,580
-Want me to close these?
-No. Keep them open.

650
00:47:55,414 --> 00:47:56,540
Should I open more?

651
00:47:57,624 --> 00:48:00,377
-How do I turn off this light?
-I'll turn it off.

652
00:48:03,213 --> 00:48:04,756
-I think I prefer this.
-Okay.

653
00:48:06,884 --> 00:48:08,176
Rafa is joining.

654
00:48:09,469 --> 00:48:13,098
Today you begin the first
of three concerts at the Metropolitan,

655
00:48:13,181 --> 00:48:16,143
which is, in some ways,
the closure of a great year for you.

656
00:48:16,226 --> 00:48:18,520
We're seeing that it was tremendous.

657
00:48:18,604 --> 00:48:21,607
Two completely different albums,
winning a Grammy.

658
00:48:21,690 --> 00:48:24,526
I'd like to ask you about that,
how you assess your year.

659
00:48:24,610 --> 00:48:27,696
This time, as an award-winner
with a gramophone, right?

660
00:48:27,779 --> 00:48:29,197
-Yes.
-You won it

661
00:48:29,281 --> 00:48:32,284
for Best Singer-Songwriter Album
if I'm not mistaken. But…

662
00:48:32,367 --> 00:48:35,078
you're nominated
for Best Regional Music Album,

663
00:48:35,162 --> 00:48:37,080
but for the Grammy Award…

664
00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:39,458
Not the Latin Grammys,
but the big Grammys.

665
00:48:39,541 --> 00:48:43,962
It's interesting to see
how your music has evolved,

666
00:48:44,046 --> 00:48:45,797
like your album Seis,

667
00:48:45,881 --> 00:48:49,259
which was included
on the list of the best albums of 2021,

668
00:48:49,343 --> 00:48:52,971
but something I like is
that you have two sold out shows.

669
00:48:53,055 --> 00:48:56,016
You're adding a third date too,
almost sold out.

670
00:48:56,099 --> 00:48:58,852
But you're amongst
the most listened-to artists.

671
00:48:58,936 --> 00:49:03,523
You have 6.3 million
Spotify listeners monthly.

672
00:49:04,441 --> 00:49:06,443
Your most listened-to song,

673
00:49:06,944 --> 00:49:13,325
"Tu falta de querer,"
has 241.6 million plays.

674
00:49:13,408 --> 00:49:18,038
Well, that's a lot.
I didn't know it had so many plays.

675
00:49:18,121 --> 00:49:19,748
This makes me really happy.

676
00:49:19,831 --> 00:49:23,543
I imagine you've had an easy pregnancy,

677
00:49:23,627 --> 00:49:27,631
since you've been able
to launch this tour in the United States.

678
00:49:27,714 --> 00:49:33,053
And now, I don't know when
you'll stop to give birth to that baby.

679
00:49:33,136 --> 00:49:35,347
What can you tell us about that, Mon?

680
00:49:36,014 --> 00:49:38,684
I won't stop. I'll give birth on stage.

681
00:49:50,070 --> 00:49:51,947
My phone is ringing.

682
00:49:52,030 --> 00:49:53,699
I'm not going to answer it.

683
00:50:03,625 --> 00:50:05,794
Dani, I need the radio.

684
00:50:05,877 --> 00:50:07,671
-Sorry?
-The radio.

685
00:50:07,754 --> 00:50:11,049
-I'm asking for it.
-I need it now.

686
00:50:11,133 --> 00:50:14,344
But I need it. It's more important
than whatever you're doing.

687
00:50:14,428 --> 00:50:15,387
Okay.

688
00:50:16,555 --> 00:50:17,597
Hello, doctor.

689
00:50:19,141 --> 00:50:22,602
Sorry to bother you again, but I'm having…

690
00:50:23,395 --> 00:50:26,815
really bad allergies
and I haven't taken the loratadine.

691
00:50:28,567 --> 00:50:30,235
Since you said that…

692
00:50:30,736 --> 00:50:34,072
I mean, you preferred I didn't use it.

693
00:50:35,615 --> 00:50:37,909
I'm having these, like…

694
00:50:37,993 --> 00:50:41,079
small asthma attacks.

695
00:50:41,163 --> 00:50:44,875
Last night, it was really hard to breathe.

696
00:50:45,375 --> 00:50:48,462
Actually, I can barely sleep
because I can't breathe.

697
00:50:50,505 --> 00:50:54,926
And I don't want to take anything
that could harm the baby.

698
00:50:56,553 --> 00:50:58,430
Tell me what I can do.

699
00:50:58,513 --> 00:50:59,973
I have a show tonight.

700
00:51:00,057 --> 00:51:03,435
I have a show tonight,
tomorrow, and the day after that.

701
00:51:03,518 --> 00:51:07,606
And my throat is very irritated, and…

702
00:51:08,106 --> 00:51:09,399
And I can't breathe.

703
00:51:09,900 --> 00:51:14,571
My airways are closed
and I sound like… a whistle.

704
00:51:16,114 --> 00:51:19,534
My allergies are killing me!
I want to scratch everything.

705
00:51:19,618 --> 00:51:21,119
What are you allergic to?

706
00:51:23,371 --> 00:51:28,418
My job isn't being in an office
or having a normal schedule.

707
00:51:28,502 --> 00:51:31,129
This is my job and
I've done the same thing my whole life,

708
00:51:31,213 --> 00:51:33,507
so my body is used to doing this.

709
00:51:33,590 --> 00:51:37,177
But, I have to work,
and my doc gave me permission, so…

710
00:51:38,678 --> 00:51:40,097
I'm going to work.

711
00:51:40,764 --> 00:51:44,059
I love that one time,
I saw an interview with Lady Gaga,

712
00:51:44,142 --> 00:51:49,439
and they asked her,
"Did you ever think that you'd be famous?"

713
00:51:50,023 --> 00:51:54,111
And she said, "I've always been famous,
it's just no one knew it yet."

714
00:51:55,904 --> 00:51:58,156
-I loved that.
-I saw that on YouTube.

715
00:51:58,240 --> 00:52:02,077
We're going to connect to the music,
to your emotions.

716
00:52:02,994 --> 00:52:05,747
I know it's difficult
when we always do the same thing,

717
00:52:05,831 --> 00:52:09,751
but surely, there are songs
that mean something to you,

718
00:52:09,835 --> 00:52:12,963
melodies that touch you.

719
00:52:13,046 --> 00:52:17,175
You're my backing band,
you guys are the show,

720
00:52:17,259 --> 00:52:19,928
and I need you more than ever because I'm…

721
00:52:20,011 --> 00:52:22,430
operating at half capacity.

722
00:52:22,514 --> 00:52:24,141
Even less.

723
00:52:24,224 --> 00:52:30,021
We give it our all! If not, what's it for?

724
00:53:37,797 --> 00:53:41,134
Honestly, it sounded really good,
as usual.

725
00:53:41,218 --> 00:53:44,429
-Your singing was perfect.
-No. I sang horribly, dude.

726
00:53:44,512 --> 00:53:46,640
-No.
-I'm just really hard on myself.

727
00:53:46,723 --> 00:53:48,975
I was struggling too much to sing.

728
00:53:49,059 --> 00:53:50,602
I couldn't breathe.

729
00:53:50,685 --> 00:53:52,854
During the second song
I was like, "My God!"

730
00:53:53,855 --> 00:53:57,901
I mean, I wasn't even at 30% capacity.

731
00:53:57,984 --> 00:53:59,110
It's the first time.

732
00:53:59,861 --> 00:54:02,656
-I sang horribly.
-You did not sing horribly.

733
00:54:02,739 --> 00:54:04,824
-I sang horribly.
-You sang well, you just--

734
00:54:04,908 --> 00:54:06,910
I don't like when you lie to me.

735
00:54:07,702 --> 00:54:09,704
-You were very tired.
-Dude.

736
00:54:10,747 --> 00:54:12,874
No, but you could tell
that you were suddenly…

737
00:54:13,416 --> 00:54:17,796
-I mean, you were short of breath.
-…of breath.

738
00:54:17,879 --> 00:54:19,506
I mean, yeah.

739
00:54:19,589 --> 00:54:22,217
Yeah, so that it really helps you. That.

740
00:54:22,300 --> 00:54:23,134
That.

741
00:54:23,677 --> 00:54:26,554
That's what we should have,
something like that.

742
00:54:27,180 --> 00:54:29,891
-To elevate your feet.
-For the last two songs.

743
00:54:43,780 --> 00:54:46,283
I started to sing at a bar in Veracruz.

744
00:54:46,366 --> 00:54:50,495
Six hours from Mexico City by bus.

745
00:54:51,246 --> 00:54:52,956
Covers.

746
00:54:53,748 --> 00:54:56,376
And I began to live the night.

747
00:54:57,002 --> 00:55:00,714
I was there for a year.
I sang on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.

748
00:55:00,797 --> 00:55:04,634
On Sunday, I'd take the bus back
to my house in Mexico City,

749
00:55:04,718 --> 00:55:06,469
since I lived in Mexico City.

750
00:55:07,012 --> 00:55:10,348
I'd be there Monday,
Tuesday, and Wednesday,

751
00:55:10,432 --> 00:55:13,184
trying to do something with my music,

752
00:55:13,268 --> 00:55:18,815
like trying to meet people,
or make connections, or do something.

753
00:55:19,899 --> 00:55:21,901
Then, on the weekend, I'd go to Veracruz.

754
00:55:21,985 --> 00:55:23,653
Two, three, four…

755
00:55:34,914 --> 00:55:36,541
The next year,

756
00:55:36,624 --> 00:55:39,502
I got a job at a bar in Mexico City,

757
00:55:39,586 --> 00:55:42,839
and that's how it was for many years,
I just played in bars.

758
00:55:42,922 --> 00:55:44,883
My heart is racing

759
00:55:44,966 --> 00:55:46,968
You shot me hard

760
00:55:48,011 --> 00:55:51,097
You looked at me slowly, slowly

761
00:55:51,181 --> 00:55:53,975
I have your body doing spins

762
00:55:54,059 --> 00:55:57,103
I like them, like you

763
00:55:57,187 --> 00:56:00,315
An electric crash inside

764
00:56:01,191 --> 00:56:02,734
Give me a try…

765
00:56:07,530 --> 00:56:12,827
At some point, I started to have
a lot of fans of the covers.

766
00:56:12,911 --> 00:56:17,040
I mean, they followed me
to each bar I'd sing at.

767
00:56:17,123 --> 00:56:20,126
I remember them saying,
"When will you record your album?"

768
00:56:22,045 --> 00:56:24,964
Next week,
we start on Mon Laferte's album.

769
00:56:25,715 --> 00:56:28,385
I'm happy. I'm nervous!

770
00:56:29,094 --> 00:56:30,970
I think it will be incredible.

771
00:56:33,348 --> 00:56:35,600
My first album is Desechable.

772
00:56:35,683 --> 00:56:37,060
We're talking 2011.

773
00:56:38,103 --> 00:56:40,105
But then, with Tornasol,

774
00:56:40,188 --> 00:56:44,067
more people started following my music,

775
00:56:44,150 --> 00:56:48,029
and there came a period when,
at many places,

776
00:56:48,113 --> 00:56:49,864
I'd play my own songs.

777
00:56:49,948 --> 00:56:52,200
And there were many forums to play in,

778
00:56:52,283 --> 00:56:56,121
and we did a lot of that in parks,
we'd play on the street,

779
00:56:56,204 --> 00:56:58,623
and they'd come with us and help us.

780
00:56:58,706 --> 00:57:02,293
But at that time,
there was a big independent music scene.

781
00:57:02,377 --> 00:57:04,462
I hid

782
00:57:04,546 --> 00:57:09,551
I held myself up
But I can't anymore

783
00:57:09,634 --> 00:57:11,845
I strongly remember

784
00:57:12,345 --> 00:57:15,306
during that Tornasol period…

785
00:57:15,390 --> 00:57:18,435
starting to also feel like…

786
00:57:18,518 --> 00:57:19,602
capable.

787
00:57:20,395 --> 00:57:22,272
I started to find myself too.

788
00:57:22,355 --> 00:57:25,692
To listen to myself.
To listen and to find my voice, you know?

789
00:57:25,775 --> 00:57:29,696
In my writing, as well.
And to trust, that's very important.

790
00:57:32,782 --> 00:57:35,285
Yeah, it was a lovely time, like…

791
00:57:35,869 --> 00:57:39,831
the Mexican underground,
it was all very alternative.

792
00:57:56,222 --> 00:57:57,474
-Hello?
-Hello?

793
00:57:57,557 --> 00:58:00,059
-Daniela?
-No, this is Mon.

794
00:58:00,143 --> 00:58:02,270
Tell me the truth, let's be super honest.

795
00:58:02,353 --> 00:58:04,564
Is someone coming or not?
Have they left or not?

796
00:58:04,647 --> 00:58:06,065
-What's happening?
-They left.

797
00:58:06,149 --> 00:58:10,028
-Give me that person's number, please.
-Sure, I'll send that to you.

798
00:58:10,111 --> 00:58:14,324
I'm waiting for the person to help me
because we have a ton of problems.

799
00:58:14,407 --> 00:58:17,744
The nails are on backwards…
So many things are wrong.

800
00:58:17,827 --> 00:58:19,746
You put my nails on backwards.

801
00:58:19,829 --> 00:58:21,748
They are about to be there…

802
00:58:21,831 --> 00:58:24,167
Be honest,
tell me if they're coming or not.

803
00:58:24,250 --> 00:58:27,545
-If not, I'll figure it out myself.
-No, they are coming.

804
00:58:29,589 --> 00:58:33,009
The buttons are wrong,
the belt is wrong, the nails are wrong.

805
00:58:33,092 --> 00:58:36,971
The belt for the red dress comes off,
so we need…

806
00:58:37,055 --> 00:58:41,184
My love, my baby.
Come here my precious boy.

807
00:58:41,726 --> 00:58:43,269
Okay, tell me what we have.

808
00:58:43,353 --> 00:58:46,981
Padded black belt, thin red ribbon,
nails, black tie, and buttons.

809
00:58:47,065 --> 00:58:48,233
-That's it.
-Yeah?

810
00:58:48,316 --> 00:58:50,860
I'll see if they come.
I'll take care of it.

811
00:58:58,493 --> 00:59:02,539
Right, my love?
How nice to sleep until 9:30.

812
00:59:02,622 --> 00:59:06,084
He knew. He said, "Okay, fine.
You have to sing today, Mom."

813
00:59:07,919 --> 00:59:10,213
My beautiful little boy.

814
00:59:11,172 --> 00:59:13,383
My son makes me so happy.

815
00:59:15,635 --> 00:59:17,470
-How are you?
-Very good. You?

816
00:59:17,554 --> 00:59:19,472
-Good.
-What's going on today?

817
00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:22,642
-Everything's just been so stressful.
-I can imagine.

818
00:59:23,184 --> 00:59:26,104
I've never had
to run around so much for a show.

819
00:59:27,021 --> 00:59:28,064
Yeah, I saw.

820
00:59:28,147 --> 00:59:31,276
-My cell? Anyone know where it is?
-Here it is.

821
00:59:32,068 --> 00:59:34,529
-Thank you.
-Let's hydrate your lips.

822
00:59:36,155 --> 00:59:38,908
When we have a chance…

823
00:59:40,034 --> 00:59:42,412
Here you go.

824
00:59:51,588 --> 00:59:54,674
-Rule number two.
-Say nothing.

825
00:59:56,092 --> 00:59:57,468
The team doesn't talk.

826
00:59:59,178 --> 01:00:03,057
The main rule is I'm always right
and everyone does as they're told.

827
01:00:03,141 --> 01:00:04,976
-Buddy.
-Yeah?

828
01:00:05,059 --> 01:00:07,520
-What time did she say? Okay.
-She still hasn't said.

829
01:00:18,072 --> 01:00:20,658
-Are we making the circle?
-Yes.

830
01:00:20,742 --> 01:00:23,161
Do you have another color? A little more.

831
01:00:23,244 --> 01:00:24,579
We leave in four.

832
01:00:25,330 --> 01:00:27,415
-Coming.
-You leave in four minutes.

833
01:00:31,294 --> 01:00:32,629
Bye, Emilita.

834
01:00:33,129 --> 01:00:35,840
Bye, my little guy, I love you.

835
01:00:40,511 --> 01:00:43,097
-Take care, Momma!
-Okay. Ready.

836
01:00:46,351 --> 01:00:48,353
Ready? Let's go.

837
01:00:49,896 --> 01:00:53,274
How handsome!
You look incredible. I love it.

838
01:00:53,358 --> 01:00:54,942
Okay, band.

839
01:00:55,026 --> 01:00:58,071
It's my first show as a mother.

840
01:00:59,614 --> 01:01:02,241
So it's going to be
super beautiful and special.

841
01:01:02,325 --> 01:01:04,327
Welcome to the club. We're gonna have fun.

842
01:01:04,410 --> 01:01:06,537
That's it! Let's have a good time!

843
01:01:06,621 --> 01:01:13,002
We give it our all! If not, what's it for?

844
01:01:21,886 --> 01:01:24,430
I said goodbye

845
01:01:24,514 --> 01:01:28,518
But I lied to you
I didn't want to leave

846
01:01:31,479 --> 01:01:33,398
I hid

847
01:01:33,481 --> 01:01:37,735
I held myself up
But I can't anymore

848
01:01:39,529 --> 01:01:42,448
I wanted to erase you
To forget you

849
01:01:42,532 --> 01:01:45,618
But I keep remembering you

850
01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:47,161
Hands up, let's go!

851
01:01:48,830 --> 01:01:52,291
Let's see. Volumen 1,
well, I love that album.

852
01:01:53,710 --> 01:01:55,169
I remember that

853
01:01:55,253 --> 01:01:59,966
I was about to start recording a new album
with César, who was my partner.

854
01:02:01,759 --> 01:02:05,012
César was someone super important.

855
01:02:05,847 --> 01:02:08,975
And he'll always be
very important in my life.

856
01:02:09,058 --> 01:02:13,479
-Mon, I would play it with a ride.
-If you want, we'll do it with a ride.

857
01:02:13,563 --> 01:02:16,441
-That's what I said.
-I'm saying with a ride solo.

858
01:02:16,524 --> 01:02:18,526
A ride, but on the edge.

859
01:02:19,318 --> 01:02:23,197
And suddenly… I found out about…

860
01:02:24,157 --> 01:02:27,034
a mistake, a foolish infidelity,

861
01:02:27,535 --> 01:02:29,245
and I…

862
01:02:29,912 --> 01:02:31,205
I was fucked up.

863
01:02:32,957 --> 01:02:35,543
I felt that rejection

864
01:02:36,502 --> 01:02:38,045
I had escaped from,

865
01:02:39,756 --> 01:02:40,715
and…

866
01:02:41,215 --> 01:02:43,718
I got really depressed, or better yet,

867
01:02:44,802 --> 01:02:47,805
I realized that
I'd been depressed for many years.

868
01:02:52,143 --> 01:02:55,688
I've already got the gun ready

869
01:02:57,106 --> 01:03:00,777
A shot to the head…

870
01:03:01,486 --> 01:03:03,029
I stopped working.

871
01:03:03,821 --> 01:03:06,282
I had no money. I mean, I was…

872
01:03:06,866 --> 01:03:07,867
really bad.

873
01:03:07,950 --> 01:03:10,286
I smoked like… I mean…

874
01:03:11,746 --> 01:03:16,334
I think that it must have been
very depressing to see me.

875
01:03:17,126 --> 01:03:18,669
Unbathed.

876
01:03:18,753 --> 01:03:21,005
With ashtrays full of butts.

877
01:03:23,549 --> 01:03:26,761
Bottles. My house was a disaster.

878
01:03:29,931 --> 01:03:30,765
I cried,

879
01:03:31,390 --> 01:03:35,269
I made a scene, I threw myself
to the floor, I drank, I screamed.

880
01:03:36,354 --> 01:03:37,730
It was a disaster.

881
01:03:42,735 --> 01:03:43,736
And…

882
01:03:44,821 --> 01:03:47,573
And I became a horrible, dark,

883
01:03:47,657 --> 01:03:49,325
dirty, and difficult person.

884
01:03:54,247 --> 01:03:58,084
And I couldn't sleep.
I had insomnia. I'd cry all day.

885
01:03:58,167 --> 01:03:59,544
So, to sleep…

886
01:04:01,921 --> 01:04:03,923
I'd drink my wine,

887
01:04:04,632 --> 01:04:07,301
and without realizing it
I started drinking more.

888
01:04:07,385 --> 01:04:12,098
Glass after glass until, I didn't realize,
but I'd become an alcoholic.

889
01:04:14,517 --> 01:04:15,852
And I feel like there,

890
01:04:17,311 --> 01:04:20,523
for the first time, I stopped fighting

891
01:04:22,149 --> 01:04:25,862
and trying to be loved and be incredible,
and strong, and marvelous.

892
01:04:26,654 --> 01:04:29,240
Instead, I allowed myself

893
01:04:30,616 --> 01:04:33,327
to suffer,
I think, for the first time, like…

894
01:04:34,620 --> 01:04:36,622
Or to cry for the first time.

895
01:04:37,623 --> 01:04:39,792
Because I don't think I ever had.

896
01:04:45,339 --> 01:04:48,175
And there was a moment when I started

897
01:04:48,259 --> 01:04:51,137
googling every day

898
01:04:52,513 --> 01:04:54,265
how to take my own life…

899
01:04:56,309 --> 01:04:57,393
without pain.

900
01:04:57,476 --> 01:05:00,897
And I went so far as to take pills,
mix them.

901
01:05:02,148 --> 01:05:04,108
Then, there was a night when…

902
01:05:04,191 --> 01:05:06,736
I don't remember, honestly.
I was so drunk.

903
01:05:07,862 --> 01:05:10,781
I cut myself.
I wanted to kill myself. Right?

904
01:05:13,159 --> 01:05:14,493
I don't even remember.

905
01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,581
I was fucked up.

906
01:05:18,664 --> 01:05:19,916
I mean…

907
01:05:21,208 --> 01:05:22,293
bad.

908
01:05:23,628 --> 01:05:27,214
Ungrateful…

909
01:05:37,141 --> 01:05:40,603
A friend of mine told me,
"You'll be in really bad shape,

910
01:05:40,686 --> 01:05:43,439
but a day will come when you'll wake up…

911
01:05:45,942 --> 01:05:48,361
and the first thing you'll think about

912
01:05:48,444 --> 01:05:50,696
won't be César
or what you're going through."

913
01:05:50,780 --> 01:05:55,201
"You're going to think of something else,
and it won't be catastrophic."

914
01:05:55,284 --> 01:05:57,119
"Hold on to that day."

915
01:05:57,203 --> 01:06:01,791
Then, I remember waking up one day
and looking at the ceiling,

916
01:06:01,874 --> 01:06:04,377
and seeing there was
a giant condensation stain.

917
01:06:05,753 --> 01:06:08,881
I thought I'd have to fix it.
So, I saw like…

918
01:06:09,715 --> 01:06:11,926
hope, because I was worried

919
01:06:12,009 --> 01:06:15,304
that I'd have to fix the condensation.

920
01:06:15,388 --> 01:06:17,515
That speaks of wanting to be better.

921
01:06:28,484 --> 01:06:32,113
And I had a ton of songs
and I started recording them at home.

922
01:06:32,196 --> 01:06:34,949
Me playing the guitar,
me playing the bass,

923
01:06:35,032 --> 01:06:36,867
with the help of my friends.

924
01:06:36,951 --> 01:06:38,577
I'd say, "Record." And they would.

925
01:06:38,661 --> 01:06:43,082
I'd say, "It doesn't matter.
I'll record with what I have on hand."

926
01:06:46,043 --> 01:06:47,878
My electricity was cut off.

927
01:06:49,046 --> 01:06:52,883
Because I didn't pay the light bill
since I wasn't working.

928
01:06:52,967 --> 01:06:56,012
I remember being mad one day,

929
01:06:56,721 --> 01:06:58,973
and taking an extension cord,

930
01:06:59,056 --> 01:07:01,267
I put together
all the extension cords I had,

931
01:07:01,350 --> 01:07:03,936
and I went to the parking garage,
plugged them in,

932
01:07:04,020 --> 01:07:07,606
and I put… the extension cord
went all the way to my door.

933
01:07:07,690 --> 01:07:11,318
On the door, stuck like this…
I put my computer and a lamp.

934
01:07:11,402 --> 01:07:12,695
That's how I made the album.

935
01:07:18,951 --> 01:07:20,578
And…

936
01:07:21,162 --> 01:07:22,663
it healed me.

937
01:07:22,747 --> 01:07:25,458
The launch was like,
"I'm going to release it."

938
01:07:25,541 --> 01:07:27,793
Push a button and…
Internet, right? That's it.

939
01:07:27,877 --> 01:07:29,336
Ready. Released.

940
01:07:30,337 --> 01:07:31,589
Independent releases.

941
01:07:33,382 --> 01:07:37,136
…Mon Laferte with "Tu falta de querer."
Stay with us on Los 40.

942
01:07:46,520 --> 01:07:51,400
We're on the radio, baby!

943
01:08:16,509 --> 01:08:18,427
Today I went back

944
01:08:18,511 --> 01:08:24,183
To sleep in our bed
And it's all the same

945
01:08:24,767 --> 01:08:29,772
The air and our cats
Nothing will change

946
01:08:29,855 --> 01:08:31,273
It's hard to forget you

947
01:08:31,357 --> 01:08:33,859
And it started to go well…

948
01:08:34,652 --> 01:08:37,780
It didn't make sense. I mean,
everyone wanted to listen to the songs.

949
01:08:37,863 --> 01:08:39,198
I was like, "What?"

950
01:08:39,281 --> 01:08:42,660
And I realized that the songs,
the music had magic too.

951
01:08:42,743 --> 01:08:44,912
Because I didn't go out
and sell this album.

952
01:08:44,995 --> 01:08:47,123
I didn't do promos,

953
01:08:47,206 --> 01:08:49,917
I didn't tell my story,
nobody knew what had happened.

954
01:08:50,000 --> 01:08:53,838
I mean, it's not like,
"Poor girl." I wasn't being pitied.

955
01:08:54,797 --> 01:08:57,341
It was incredible. It was a movie.

956
01:08:58,467 --> 01:09:01,512
And at the end of the movie

957
01:09:02,263 --> 01:09:03,222
I won.

958
01:09:03,806 --> 01:09:06,642
I made my album with two pennies
at my house,

959
01:09:07,268 --> 01:09:08,727
and it's a success.

960
01:09:08,811 --> 01:09:13,107
I have all these offers,
and now I need to decide which to accept.

961
01:09:14,108 --> 01:09:15,693
I felt incredible.

962
01:09:18,070 --> 01:09:22,825
And tell me why

963
01:09:22,908 --> 01:09:26,871
No

964
01:09:26,954 --> 01:09:29,874
How is it

965
01:09:29,957 --> 01:09:35,296
That you stopped loving me?

966
01:09:36,130 --> 01:09:41,468
I could still put up with

967
01:09:42,469 --> 01:09:47,474
Your complete lack of love

968
01:10:17,588 --> 01:10:20,090
A month ago

969
01:10:20,174 --> 01:10:25,763
I used to listen to you
And be your accomplice

970
01:10:25,846 --> 01:10:31,227
I thought there would be
No one else but you

971
01:10:31,310 --> 01:10:35,773
I was your friend
I was your companion

972
01:10:38,943 --> 01:10:42,571
Now I will sleep

973
01:10:42,655 --> 01:10:47,868
Deeply to forget

974
01:10:47,952 --> 01:10:52,915
I would like to die
So as not to think

975
01:10:53,499 --> 01:10:58,128
I cover myself up
To relieve this bitterness

976
01:11:01,966 --> 01:11:05,094
Come

977
01:11:05,928 --> 01:11:10,307
And tell me the truth

978
01:11:11,767 --> 01:11:15,020
Have pity

979
01:11:17,064 --> 01:11:20,818
And tell me why

980
01:11:24,905 --> 01:11:31,912
How did you stop loving me?

981
01:11:32,913 --> 01:11:38,210
I could still put up with

982
01:11:38,294 --> 01:11:43,173
Your complete lack of love

983
01:12:08,407 --> 01:12:11,827
Come

984
01:12:12,411 --> 01:12:16,749
And tell me the truth

985
01:12:18,208 --> 01:12:22,671
Have pity

986
01:12:23,547 --> 01:12:27,885
And tell me why

987
01:12:33,807 --> 01:12:39,271
Why did you stop loving me?

988
01:12:39,355 --> 01:12:44,526
I could still put up with

989
01:12:44,610 --> 01:12:49,406
Your complete lack of love

990
01:13:00,667 --> 01:13:02,336
Joel!

991
01:13:08,550 --> 01:13:10,094
Team, blackout, please.

992
01:13:13,013 --> 01:13:17,393
Encore!

993
01:13:17,476 --> 01:13:24,233
Encore!

994
01:13:35,285 --> 01:13:36,870
Did you look?

995
01:13:36,954 --> 01:13:39,373
-Did you see?
-Yes, I saw!

996
01:13:39,456 --> 01:13:40,749
Team…

997
01:13:41,625 --> 01:13:43,210
we've finished the tour.

998
01:13:43,293 --> 01:13:44,336
It's been…

999
01:13:44,837 --> 01:13:46,338
It's been a pleasure

1000
01:13:46,422 --> 01:13:48,590
to tour with you all.
I love you very much.

1001
01:13:50,008 --> 01:13:53,137
We love you, Mon. Thanks for everything.

1002
01:13:54,972 --> 01:13:56,014
No, thank you!

1003
01:13:58,684 --> 01:14:00,018
Thanks, bitches.

1004
01:14:10,028 --> 01:14:12,739
I feel how I look.

1005
01:14:13,949 --> 01:14:16,160
It's so good to see you happy.

1006
01:14:16,869 --> 01:14:21,206
Of course, I had this kind of neurosis,
I wanted everything to turn out well,

1007
01:14:21,290 --> 01:14:23,292
I wanted everything to be perfect.

1008
01:14:23,959 --> 01:14:26,628
I wanted to, like, return post pregnancy

1009
01:14:26,712 --> 01:14:29,089
and also to demonstrate that I could

1010
01:14:29,173 --> 01:14:30,883
do it again, and that I could

1011
01:14:31,592 --> 01:14:34,678
rediscover myself,
like get back to the artist.

1012
01:14:35,262 --> 01:14:39,516
In the end I realized I'm not the same
as before I had the baby.

1013
01:14:39,600 --> 01:14:41,977
I'm much more connected to…

1014
01:14:44,062 --> 01:14:45,689
to my feelings.

1015
01:14:45,772 --> 01:14:47,399
I'm much more

1016
01:14:48,108 --> 01:14:50,360
awake, conscious, so to speak,

1017
01:14:50,444 --> 01:14:53,197
of every step I take.

1018
01:14:54,072 --> 01:14:56,074
No

1019
01:14:56,158 --> 01:14:59,244
There's nothing better

1020
01:14:59,786 --> 01:15:01,788
Than trying

1021
01:15:01,872 --> 01:15:05,000
A first kiss

1022
01:15:07,377 --> 01:15:09,379
And more of you…

1023
01:15:11,965 --> 01:15:16,553
And… it's beautiful that today
I'm a different woman.

1024
01:15:16,637 --> 01:15:19,306
In ten years, I'll be another woman.

1025
01:15:20,265 --> 01:15:21,517
And it's okay.

1026
01:15:22,184 --> 01:15:25,771
I'm a piece of a whole.

1027
01:15:26,396 --> 01:15:28,106
So, nothing is as important.

1028
01:15:28,190 --> 01:15:31,944
I've learned that too, to take life…

1029
01:15:32,945 --> 01:15:33,946
more lightly.

1030
01:15:43,789 --> 01:15:45,916
I look back and say,

1031
01:15:46,542 --> 01:15:48,961
"Would I take that journey again?"

1032
01:15:49,044 --> 01:15:54,258
"With all the effort I made to become…
successful?"

1033
01:15:57,386 --> 01:16:00,305
And today,
I think that I wouldn't do it again.

1034
01:16:00,389 --> 01:16:03,934
But I did it because
I really needed to feel accepted.

1035
01:16:04,017 --> 01:16:06,770
I was desperate for people to love me.

1036
01:16:19,825 --> 01:16:21,285
But I'm not now.

1037
01:16:21,368 --> 01:16:23,954
Because I have people that I know love me

1038
01:16:24,454 --> 01:16:25,664
as I am.

1039
01:16:27,416 --> 01:16:29,418
But I didn't before, so

1040
01:16:30,168 --> 01:16:34,131
I was always searching for
that desperate attention and that love.

1041
01:16:35,757 --> 01:16:38,594
I wanted to be someone important
in someone's life, right?

1042
01:16:38,677 --> 01:16:40,429
In someone else's life.

1043
01:18:43,969 --> 01:18:46,847
Subtitle translation by: Ryan N. Becker