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[WIND HOWLING]
ED: When I'’m up a mountain, I'’m not thinking about anything else.
Life becomes very singular, and that is my break, and that'’s blissful,
and I do feel really at peace and happy in those moments.
I do not matter on this earth.
Like, that thing has been here, in comparison, forever,
and will be here forever after me.
I'’m basically just a speck of dust
flying round the universe for a millisecond.
So, be happy, spread love.
Enjoy it.
MAN: Are you feeling pretty fit at the moment, Ed?
ED: What'’s been really interesting is, like, actually, over the last year,
I seem to have got way more activation in my left leg.
So I'’m just able to use it more.
There'’s loads of different ways to describe this,
because I'’m an incomplete quadriplegic.
I'’m technically spastic hemiplegic,
which means half of my body is different to the other half.
My left side, I can'’t lift my leg up properly.
On the right side, I don'’t feel pain or temperature.
Hand doesn'’t work properly.
It'’s just got enough to pinch-grip,
which is actually really useful,
tying laces and all of those sorts of things.
MAN: All right, high consequence, Ed, so...
You do know what I mean by "high consequence", don'’t you?
ED: I know exactly what you mean. Potential death.
MAN: Yeah, it'’s climber speak for,
"Don'’t trip over now or you'’ll die."
Can you see where we'’re going?
ED: Oh, my God.
How the hell am I gonna get on top of that?
- Well, we'’ll figure it out. - Wow, wow, wow.
MAN: It'’s proper rock climbing, you know.
The main things that affect my day-to-day life
are bladder and bowel function.
They need to be managed regularly.
When I need the toilet, I'’ve got, like, 90 seconds to find one.
But when I'’m out and about, it means I have to wear, like, a bag, basically.
Nobody knows, really, that that'’s going on.
They just kind of see Ed limping and think, "Oh, that'’s really bad."
But it'’s the underlying issues that you don'’t feel like you can talk about.
They'’re unseen.
VICAR: May they cherish the moments of their individual pasts...
ED: I don'’t sweat from below the nipple line,
which is quite a strange one.
I nearly fainted at my own wedding.
I overheat really easily.
I have to be careful. I'’ve got the ability to cool myself down.
ED: Lois, on the other hand, her investment strategy has to be questioned.
[GUESTS LAUGHING]
She went out with a professional sportsman,
and now she'’s married to Mr Wobble.
LOIS: Aw! Never any other way.
- But... - [GUESTS HECKLING]
But, but, but, but... Mr Wobble loves you.
- MAN: Yeah! - More than you will ever know.
- GUESTS: Aw! - ED: And I am so proud to call you my wife.
[GUESTS CHEERING]
In a way it'’s sometimes easier for me to deal with because...
I can'’t see it...
you have to watch it...
...so it probably gets to you more.
I don'’t think that'’s it...
It'’s just been drilled into me that
knees are not meant to go in...
Tell me about it.
I don'’t really have a choice.
Yeah, I know, why are you getting so aggy?
Sorry.
I'’m trying to talk to you about it.
My shoulders hurt every day...
that'’s got nothing to do with my spinal cord injury.
The last thing I want to do
is completely under prepare for something
and not be fit enough and let other people down,
like this is harder than it should be...
so I need to do them to get fit enough...
there'’s no way I'’m getting up Mont Buet like this.
♪ Ain'’t no mountain high enough ♪
[LOIS LAUGHS]
♪ Ain'’t no valley low enough ♪
- We'’ve all gone mad. - MAN: Yeah.
♪ Ain'’t no river wide enough ♪
♪ To keep me from getting to the top of Buet ♪
[LOIS WHOOPS]
[CLIMBERS CHATTERING]
Sorry. I just remembered we'’ve gotta walk back down.
[ALL LAUGH]
You know, for a long time, obviously, I didn'’t think I'’d be able
to be places like this again, um...
Just remember to focus on the things
in your life and about your life that are positive,
and things you'’ve already got, not the stuff you haven'’t, um...
Because it'’s too easy to just concentrate on negative stuff
and what other people are doing, what other people have got,
and you completely forget about how good your own lives are.
So, it'’s been an amazing, positive experience for me,
and I hope everyone else can take something away from it as well.
- MAN: A hundred percent. - ED: Love you, guys.
[APPLAUSE]
COMMENTATOR: He'’s a number eight who Lyn knows well.
He coached him at London Welsh. Ed Jackson.
Played at Wasps,
a product of the Bath Academy,
so lots of pedigree.
He'’s an excellent ball carrier.
Gets over the gain line.
And also has good leadership qualities.
ED: I was lucky enough to be
a professional rugby player for ten years,
which was a dream come true
for a kid brought up in the West Country,
where it'’s very rugby heavy.
COMMENTATOR: He'’s added a real bit of quality here, I feel,
and it'’ll be great to see what he does with the ball tonight
off the back of his Man of the Match performance last week.
ED: Played for the English Premiership and the Welsh Leagues.
It was a dream come true.
You'’re effectively doing PE for a living with your mates.
I would say I was probably at the peak of my career.
COMMENTATOR: The referee has a close look. Ed Jackson is claiming it.
ED: I was playing for the Dragons in Wales,
and I'’d just signed another two-year contract.
COMMENTATOR: And he'’s got the try. The Dragons are back in it.
ED: Absolutely loving it, living in Cardiff.
You think it'’s never gonna end.
COMMENTATOR: One stand-out performance for the Dragons tonight
was new signing Ed Jackson.
Well done, Ed. Top performance in your home debut. Well done.
Thank you very much.
ED: I was 27. It was the first really hot day of the year.
We went round to our parents'’ friends'’ house to use their pool.
And I took my T-shirt off,
and I just remember turning round and walking to the end of the pool,
looking and smiling at one of my friends at the other end,
and I just jumped and dived in.
[SPLASHING]
What I thought was about six to eight feet deep
turned out to only be about three feet deep.
There was 18 stone of rugby player going through the top of my head.
Then when I tried to stand up, that'’s when I realised something wasn'’t right.
I couldn'’t move.
I was underwater staring at the surface.
Next thing I know, an arm grabbed me.
Luckily, my dad was in the pool and one of my friends.
They pulled me to the surface.
I had hit my head so hard that my neck had given way at the bottom.
The disc in between the two vertebrae had exploded
and shards of the disc had lodged into my spinal cord,
so I was rendered sort of completely paralysed from the shoulders down.
My dad is a retired doctor. He knew I needed to be immobilised.
I told everybody exactly what I wanted them to do,
and I switched off the bit
that it was my son lying in the pool
and just switched on the bit that said,
"I'’m the only medical professional here."
ED: The ambulance turned up.
They floated the spinal board underneath me,
picked me up and carried me, um, to the ambulance.
MARK: Probably the luckiest thing that Edward had in his accident
was that he stayed in the pool.
So his neck never moved after that initial trauma.
And then the rest of the day'’s a bit of a blur, to be honest.
[STRETCHER WHEELS RATTLE]
ED: All of a sudden, there was lots of doctors around me,
and people taking notes and talking quietly.
That'’s when it started to sink in.
I remember Lois coming in.
She wasn'’t actually there with me at the time. She was in Cardiff.
LOIS: Got a phone call from Ed'’s stepmum.
I'’d just finished playing Super League netball over in Wales.
She said, "He'’s fine. Just...
You just need to get into the car and get to the hospital."
My initial reaction was, "Oh, what an idiot.
Like, I'’m sure he'’s just grazed himself and he'’s gonna be fine."
As soon as I looked into his eyes,
I just knew that it wasn'’t... was not good.
He looked so scared, and he was kind of shaking, trembling,
and I felt like I was just in a movie.
I just remember sort of saying sorry.
And I didn'’t really know why I was saying sorry,
but I think I knew deep down why I was saying sorry.
Um... But, um...
Yeah, it was pretty... it was pretty scary. Yeah.
Oh, sorry.
[SNIFFS] I don'’t think I'’ve sort of run through it in my head
that detailed bef... as...
You know, I'’ve told the story before,
but I'’ve never really sort of
emotionally connected with it like that.
I remember just feeling really guilty at the time.
I was just thinking like, "How could I have done that?"
It was so stupid.
[SNIFFS]
[STRETCHER WHEELS RATTLE]
I was straight back in an ambulance, going to Southmead Hospital in Bristol,
which is a neurological centre, cos they knew I needed an emergency operation.
I was like, "I'’ll just have a quick nap."
They were like, "No, don'’t do that. Stay awake, stay awake."
MARK: What we didn'’t discover till later
was that that journey took a long time
because his heart kept stopping.
They kept having to inject adrenaline to keep it going.
Looking at his dad, I knew, cos he'’s, like, the strongest person,
never gets emotional about anything, and he was just so silent.
ED: I was very lucky that a surgeon called Mr Neil Barua,
one of the leading neurosurgeons in the country,
is on call on a Saturday night.
The last thing I remember from him was him saying,
"There is a chance you won'’t wake up from this operation."
We always had a rule that you never contact us,
or any of us, on holiday, ever.
So if you know you'’re on holiday, no news is good news.
And Lois rang, and she said, "It'’s Ed."
ED: Woke up from the operation.
There was a lot of bleeping machines. There was tubes coming out of me.
I was like, "This is a nightmare.
You know, they'’ve fixed me. I'’ll be fine."
But then slowly I tried to move my left foot.
Nothing happened. Right foot. Nothing happened.
I was like, "OK, just... I'’ll be able to move my arms." But nothing.
I was just a head on a pillow, basically.
I went in to see him.
Um...
Hard, yeah.
And I had to sort of man up every time I walked in the door.
You'’d walk out and think... [EXHALES]
When his friends came in, there was one in particular, Souto.
I was with Ed, and Souto came in and just collapsed.
And, you know, you could see Ed'’s face.
After that, I actually took a photograph,
and I said, "Right, this is what you'’re walking into."
I said, "Look at this photograph." I said, "Please do not collapse."
Cos most of them are really big softies. At the end the day, they are.
Anyway, they'’d just collapse in the waiting room and go, "OK."
I said, "When you go in there, you walk in with a smile on your face
and treat him as if he'’s, you know, just hurt something."
And that'’s... It worked.
ED: I flicked into "make everyone else feel all right".
And that became a really good distraction for me during the day.
Putting that act on was quite important for myself.
You embody it.
But then at night, it was horrific.
I was in a pretty dark place, mentally.
There was so much anxiety around
was I ever gonna be able to walk again?
Was I ever gonna be able to work again?
Would I have to sell my house to pay for rehab?
All of this stuff is just going through your mind
when you don'’t have those people there to distract you.
Many times I thought, you know, "I don'’t wanna be here any more"
and "What does this mean for everyone else?"
And especially Lois. Um...
I didn'’t want her to have to live with someone
that couldn'’t look after themselves,
and it'’s not what she sort of bought into and, um...
Fortunately I couldn'’t move enough to... to... to end it all,
so I had to put up with where I was.
He was trying to tell me to leave him, even at that point,
cos he was just like, "I'’m so sorry. You don'’t deserve this life."
And I think, like, we'’d spoken so much about the future
in terms of, like, where we would wanna go and what we'’d wanna do,
and it was always, like... really active things,
so I think that was just, like, maybe gonna be taken away from us.
As soon as I told him to shut up and that I wasn'’t gonna leave him,
then that was kind of that conversation done.
The times when I really struggled were when I was on my own,
and it was like the drive back from the hospital or to the hospital.
And that'’s when I'’d kind of break down,
cos I didn'’t wanna do it in front of Ed.
ED: The turning point for me was being told
after nine days by the surgeon,
"You'’re category ASIA A1, which is the highest level of spinal cord injury.
The likelihood is you'’re never gonna walk again."
I remember looking down the bed and seeing Lois sat there.
She had burst into tears. And my mum sat there, and she was in tears.
I realised then that it wasn'’t about me.
If I didn'’t have Lois and my mum there,
or I didn'’t have people like that to get better for,
then I wouldn'’t have found the motivation.
I saw it in so many others.
Some people had no visitors,
and of course they just woke up every morning
and just wanted to take as many drugs as possible
and forget about it.
It was the thing that gave me the motivation
to spend every waking minute trying to move something.
LOIS: Oh, my God, Ed, it'’s moving so much.
ED: And I just remember being like, "My toe'’s moving!"
Then I was like, "I just need to keep moving it,
cos I don'’t want it to stop moving."
So I'’m there just focusing really hard.
People are coming in. I'’m like, "Look!"
I'’m not doing that, because I'’m laying flat on my back,
staring at the ceiling. I'’m like, "Look at my toe."
That showed that there was a connection past my injury,
so all... all bets were off.
As soon as he got that flicker in his toe,
he was like, "I'’m gonna walk again."
And... And I was like, "Yeah. Yeah, you are."
- [WOMAN LAUGHS] - LOIS: Hold Souto'’s hand. Hold his hand.
- Even healthier than mine, bro. - [LAUGHTER]
Mine are purple.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
[LOIS LAUGHS]
- Not much has changed. - Fucking hell.
[BIRD SCREECHES]
LOIS: Once out of there, we could start looking up, really,
and that'’s when the hard work kind of really kicked in.
We were like, "Right, when can we start? Like, we'’ll start..."
We were already moving his legs and his arms.
PHYSIO: One, two, three, push. Come on, boy. Push, push, push.
LOIS: When we met his physio, Pete, in the Bath hospital,
and he actually took me aside and said, "We'’ll get him walking again",
and then I was like "Right, let'’s do this."
PETE: Come on. And again, again. Pull, pull, pull, pull, pull, pull...
With Ed, we had somebody who was exceptional.
Um, all patients are exceptional in a way.
Pulling back. Good.
But with Ed, we had somebody with a sporting background,
someone with a huge drive,
and somebody who understood the benefits of exercise.
Good. Ten! Come on...
MARK: Pete Bishop-Ponte, who I think is quite remarkable,
he'’s a great believer in intense physiotherapy for spinal cord injuries
in the very early stages of recovery.
- All right, nice. - Nice. Really good, Ed.
Yeah, that'’s nice.
PETE: Here we had a young man
that just needed someone to throw him a lifeline.
Someone to say something positive.
Someone to give him words based on fact
that he could possibly work his way and train his way out of this.
One, two, three, up. Good.
He was exceptionally motivated.
So we have a big gym in Salisbury
and he and Lois were in there all hours of the day.
She was amazing. She was essentially his physio.
The emotional bit is huge, actually.
Having a great group of friends
who'’ll still come in and take the piss out of you.
And a loving partner or wife or girlfriend.
And just people there to support you
and keep you motivated and keep you going.
You can'’t even quantify it, really.
Four months later, in August,
Ed and his fiancée, Lois,
came to see me in the clinic.
And he walked in.
He wanted a photo, cos he was doing a blog at the time,
and it was quite embarrassing, cos I'’m only about five foot nine,
and a lot of jokes were made about why he was stood next to a schoolboy.
That was like the biggest turning point for him,
when he created the blog and put it out on his Instagram.
He got so many messages back saying
how much him sharing his story had helped them,
and, actually, by him helping those people, he got so much reward back.
That was the most powerful feeling, cos that was me realising
that actually some good can come from this situation,
it doesn'’t just have to be negative.
After nine months, I'’d moved home.
And it was difficult.
It was difficult to stay on top of the rehab.
I was living with my parents.
In hospital you'’re in a bubble, but I was at home,
and it was very obvious the things that I couldn'’t do any more
that I could do before.
SARAH: To start with, seeing him going up the stairs.
Heart-breaking. Mmm.
And especially if he'’s just walking around
in his boxers or whatever.
You know, he'’s always covered
in bruises and bumps and scrapes.
You know, black and blue from falling over. Mmm.
Which you don'’t see.
Our lives had been completely turned upside down.
It just wasn'’t the same at all.
We were, like, learning to get the wheelchair around the house.
He was learning about bladder, bowel control, like, sexual function.
There were so many new situations brewing
that we had no idea, really, how to handle.
I felt quite isolated and alone in my own head.
I looked into his eyes and I loved him so much,
but something wasn'’t right.
He'’d changed so much.
His whole body, his movement and everything had changed.
- Whoo! - LOIS: One of the biggest things, his smell had changed.
I actually sometimes felt like I was cheating on Ed,
pulling away when I was kissing him,
cos he smelt differently to the Ed that I knew before.
Of course, he'’s been through everything,
and that'’s why I kept it so quiet, those thoughts, for so long.
- [CHEERING] - [LAUGHS]
LOIS: I went and got help.
Don'’t speak too soon.
And did some work with sexual therapy
and had that conversation with Ed,
which was probably the most brutal conversation
I'’ve ever had in my life.
It played on a massive insecurity of mine at the time.
I had changed so much physically,
and, whether I like it or not,
I think a lot of my identity was wrapped up
in my physicality and those types of things,
and being a man and, you know, being a rugby player
and all of those things that go along with that.
It was kind of the lens through which we discussed, you know,
Lois struggling as well, basically.
- Yeah. - And it opened up that conversation.
And it was on more fronts than just, sort of,
what was going on in the bedroom.
I think when you go through something like that
with someone,
it'’s either gonna break you or, like, make you.
And you see that go one of two ways often.
And you can understand why it would break a relationship.
It nearly did for us, not because of anything...
it didn'’t highlight any issues that we had in the first place,
but it'’s just you don'’t want...
you'’re living, you go off in different paths effectively, on paper,
but, actually, if you stay together
and you ride through something emotional like that,
like so many couples have,
then it makes you so strong to the point where
you can'’t see yourself without them,
because your new life has only existed with them.
It'’s like being married from birth, in a way.
- Which is a bit strange, I suppose. - That was a bit weird.
- That was a bit of a weird thought. - Yeah.
We realised that communication was gonna be key
in order just to be, um, yeah, open and honest with each other.
You can'’t move forward with the problems that you'’re facing
unless you actually work on them together and are honest together.
- Would you agree? - Yeah, massively.
That'’s why I'’ve gone into specialising in relationship coaching,
because I want to share that journey with other people.
[WEIGHTS CLANGING]
ED: It was another turning point along the road.
I was so in the midst of trying to recover
and trying to rediscover some purpose in my life and drive forward.
I did go down a bit at that stage, I think.
I knew I needed to put something in place,
a challenge for myself, to motivate me.
I wanted to send a message to everyone else who was in hospital
that had also been told they can'’t do something
that maybe that doesn'’t have to be the case.
I said to my physios, "At the 12-month mark, I wanna climb Snowdon."
And they were like, "Excuse me? What? Um, 12 months?"
"What about 24 months? Maybe we'’ll give it a go."
But I knew that if... even if I didn'’t get up there,
even if I got 100 metres up there,
people would see me on my feet,
and it would send the message
that maybe some of them needed to hear
to not give up hope.
I'’d opened it up on social media to anyone who wanted to come and join in,
thinking a few people might turn up,
and there were 70 people there on the start line
who I didn'’t know.
I mean, the first reaction was,
"Oh, shit, I'’m gonna have to get to the top now."
[CLIMBERS CHATTERING]
LOIS: Snowdon was incredible.
I was definitely there to support him the whole way.
At times I actually felt quite disconnected from him,
cos there were so many people around him, and physios,
and everybody was worried about him falling over.
So I think at one point he had to be like,
"We'’ll walk the last bit together."
CLIMBERS: Go on, Ed!
[WHOOPING AND CHEERING]
- Well done. - Yes!
[CHEERING]
ED: It'’s one of the hardest things I'’ve ever done,
but I got to the top and just had this feeling
that I'’d achieved something for the first time since my accident.
There was all these other people
that I was taking loads from,
but also my own journey was benefitting them.
I remember staring out and not knowing
how my life would pan out but knew it wasn'’t gonna be
in a conventional way, obviously, any more.
[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]
Some of the things I'’m starting to do is just rewriting the rulebook
in my own head, and hopefully in other people'’s heads,
of what is possible in life, you know,
and what you'’re capable of.
You don'’t know until you try.
Finally here in the Himalayas.
Always wanted to come here.
And, as you can see, it'’s amazing.
That'’s Annapurna behind us. 8,000 metres.
Um, one of the highest mountains in the world.
And it is true what they say, when you get near them...
Just can'’t really describe...
can'’t really describe it, really.
I remember being sat in a place called Ghandruk,
and I was staring up at this 8,000-metre mountain.
And I'’d never felt so small in my life.
My brain almost couldn'’t comprehend
the size of the thing that was in front of me.
I just felt completely, like, insignificant.
It was an incredibly sort of liberating feeling.
You know when students are like, "I went on my gap year and found myself"?
Like, that actually happened to me. [LAUGHS]
I felt ridiculous coming back and actually telling anyone about it.
I think me and Lois almost kept it to ourselves.
But that was the moment we said,
"We wanna try and help people for the rest of our lives.
We wanna try and make a difference."
I remember going, "Right, let'’s drop everything and try and start a charity."
We set up a foundation to take people with psychological or physical trauma
away on these adventures.
The real reason that I'’ve made the recovery I have
is because of my support network,
and I just wanted to pay that forward to other people.
So people are sharing their experiences and their traumas,
and realising that it'’s not just them going through it.
[CHATTERING AND LAUGHING]
PETE: I have seen Ed go from a frustrated rugby player
with a spinal injury
to a man with... much more spiritual
and much more awareness of people around him
and the environment around him.
ED: Do you feel like you'’re in a better place now?
- WOMAN: A hundred percent. - Yeah.
ED: Life'’s a journey anyway.
Even if we didn'’t have anything that happened,
it'’d still be full of ups and downs.
Sometimes they just get exaggerated a bit.
WOMAN: Yes, exactly.
Um, Benny boy.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
ED: Ben'’s one of the beneficiaries of the charity.
He was a paratrooper whose parachute didn'’t open.
BEN: I joined 7th Parachute Regiment Royal Horse Artillery.
This would have been my 15th military jump, I think it was.
Uh, but I'’ve done about 65 civilian jumps beforehand.
I remember being in the plane.
I was the third... third man out of the door.
And I remember... I remember jumping.
I remember looking up, seeing what I thought was a fully opened parachute.
I thought, "Right, look at the floor, see where I am."
And as I looked at the floor, I hit it.
And when I came to, I just remember laying there thinking,
"That was a lot harder than I remembered."
And I thought, "I need to catch my breath, I need to catch my breath."
And I thought, "I'’ve got another jump to do.
I can'’t embarrass myself in front of the blokes. I need to get up."
So I took my helmet off,
and as I went to get up, the pain just shot through my body.
And next thing I know, someone'’s grabbed my head.
He was a medic, and he shouted out, "He'’s alive."
And they worked out about 75 mile an hour I hit the floor at.
Just a sheer unlucky accident.
I have no sensation in my right leg.
I have memory loss, severe back pain.
I'’m on medication for the rest of my life.
Someone filmed my jump at that time.
I kept watching it and playing it back, thinking,
"Where did I go wrong? What could I have done?"
There was nothing I could have done,
but I was doing it for nearly a year.
I was diagnosed with PTSD,
with the effects of not sleeping
and watching the video over and over again.
For me, it was failing. I feel like I failed.
So throughout my life, I feel like I fail a lot of stuff.
WOMAN: Meeting Ed has been really pinnacle
in Ben'’s mental recovery probably, emotional recovery,
because Ed has such a way of starting off deep conversations,
and Ben'’s not had that before
where he feels completely comfortable being so vulnerable.
With me he will, but with somebody else. So it'’s nice for him to have that.
ED: There'’s a saying, "The pendulum always swings."
So it'’s not just that you'’ll get through it.
Actually it will go back positive again as well.
And it'’s just having that faith, right?
When it goes negative, you can do something about it.
But just always have the faith that it'’ll come back,
come back the other way.
Anyone else like to offer something up?
The perspective that the walk, like, this has given us.
And, like, being able to walk with all these different people
and, like, make these meaningful connections.
LOIS: An intensive bonding experience.
ED: Whether you like it or not. Forced.
I was in an accident in 2016, in a bus crash in France,
and really struggled after that, developing PTSD and anxiety.
One of the things that I think Ed does really well
is his reframing and finding the enjoyment in life.
ED: Cool people are people who completely own who they are,
and whether that is you love drystone walls or War...
- [LAUGHTER] - Or Warhammer.
Understand who you are, what you enjoy, and then don'’t be embarrassed by that.
Own it. You are capable of way more than you think, you know.
We'’re too quick to be put into pigeon holes by society,
by our friends, by ourselves.
But getting outside of that comfort zone,
that'’s where the fun stuff is, and the growth is.
WOMAN: It'’s nice to just interact with people
who take the fact you'’re injured on face value,
and it doesn'’t matter that you'’re looking a bit funny
or wearing a leg brace or a bit wobbly.
One thing I'’ve found since being injured
is that an awful lot of elements of it are very lonely,
and there'’s an awful lot that you have to do on your own.
So in that aspect, I love it. It'’s really important.
Have you swum yet?
Yeah, the first time I swam was when I shat myself.
I had to swim.
That was in Penzance Harbor.
ISABEL: I'’ve got my spark back.
[LAUGHS] I feel like they'’ve really given me that back.
MAN: A quick pint now?
LOIS: Yes, absolutely. Celebratory pint.
[CHATTERING AND LAUGHING]
BEN: Cos I'’ve been accepted as a beneficiary,
I get two or three years of life coaching from Lois.
[CHATTERING AND LAUGHTER]
BEN: Hands down, one of the best things I'’ve had.
Throughout my rehab, I get told what to do,
or "You need to do this", "You'’re feeling this."
So Lois spoke to me and got the answers from me,
which was the first time,
so, yeah, it was very, very helpful.
LOIS: It'’s kind of a "pinch myself" moment
that Ed and I have created this and that it'’s really working.
And what'’s really exciting is that it'’s only the beginning,
so, yeah, it'’s cool.
[LAUGHS]
LOIS: What if I put your foot down?
No, no, no, no. No.
I need to get in a better position. I don'’t know what...
ED: It'’s not easy day-to-day living with a spinal cord injury.
Fuck.
I can'’t do all the things that I did before.
That'’s better.
I'’ll never be able to play rugby again,
or run around with my kids, or...
not go out without a catheter bag on,
or use my left hand.
- OK, I'’ll put a cushion there. - Wait. Let me roll.
- Are you sure? Just stay there. - See if I can roll on my back.
- Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
ED: Probably one of those things, I would have thought
that that would have broken me, you know.
No, actually. Fuck.
But, actually, it'’s just...
The perspective piece is the most important.
Helping others helps you massively.
It'’s such a shortcut to making yourself feel better,
and I think we'’re set up like that as humans.
BEN: Ed phoned me saying that he would like me to go to Nepal with him.
And I can remember, I burst into tears straightaway.
I was so happy. Yeah, I thought, "Oh, this is like a..."
I needed a new challenge, or a goal.
I didn'’t have anything, so I felt like
I wasn'’t going anywhere.
ED: There wasn'’t supposed to be a beneficiary on this trip.
It was one of my challenges
in terms of trying to get to a new height.
But getting to know Ben,
I realised that he was on a very similar journey to me.
He'’s an ex-paratrooper, seriously fit.
Hopefully he can start to put things in place
to find some purpose again and go down a path he wants to.
I know that my body'’s only got a certain shelf life,
and it might mean that it all ends at 40,
but I'’m terrified of becoming stagnant.
[HORNS BEEPING]
Kathmandu is Kathmandu.
You'’re hit by a completely different culture,
which is amazing.
The sounds, the smells.
So there was this mad scramble on social media
to try and find a videographer.
- A thousand rupees. - And Beetle was really enthusiastic.
So that'’s how he ended up on the trip with us.
- Let'’s get some face paint on. - Happy Holi!
ED: Arron'’s a big strong guy, he'’s very fit,
and very experienced in those environments.
- MAN: Happy Holi! - ED: Happy Holi!
ED: He also does breath work sessions and qigong.
He'’s a great friend of mine and a great ally of the charity as well.
Look at this.
Before I left, Evie pulled me to one side
and said she'’d got something to tell me.
I immediately thought it was bad news.
And she told me, uh, she was pregnant.
I spent the whole three weeks thinking of baby names, really.
[LAUGHS]
ED: We headed into the mountains,
and I remember just being like, "Yes, here we go."
Beautiful out here.
ED: Then we were off-grid, and it was a bit of a daunting feeling,
because it'’s not something we get to do very often in the Western world.
Not speaking to Lois for a long time would be very difficult.
We started heading up this valley, and it was our first really challenging day.
To become the first person ever to go to over 7,000 metres
with my type of injury is incredible,
but to be able to do it with Ben is even more powerful.
There it is.
Himlung Himal.
Himlung appeared in all its glory in front of us,
and there'’s this overwhelming feeling of isolation, in a beautiful way.
Ah!
Welcome to the Base Camp, guys!
Yes, mate.
Welcome to the Base Camp.
It'’s so cool.
BEN: Having no phone signal
was one of the best things I'’ve ever done.
If you wanted to be on your own,
you could just be on your own in your own head.
It helped massively.
ED: It'’s amazing when you'’re in spaces like that and you have no distraction,
and you contemplate your place in the world
and realise how small and, in a weird way,
humble and insignificant you are,
it'’s an immensely freeing feeling.
Nothing really matters,
not the way you think it does, especially not you.
That'’s the most poignant thing
about being in the high mountains for me,
how it changes me, not physically but emotionally, when I come back,
and gives me so much more clarity.
A little pre-lunch hike with Benny boy.
Air'’s so thin up here.
It must be about, well, well over 5,000 metres up here.
But look at this. That is wild.
There'’s Himlung in the back there.
Camp One'’s up there. So, Base Camp, Camp One, Camp Two.
Three-day climb to get from 4,900 to 7,126.
Beautiful.
BEN: When I set my mind to something,
I have to complete it before I move on to anything else.
Once I got Nepal in my head, there was no going back.
Pumped, Benny?
Pumped, I'’m really excited.
BEN: After the accident, I started to feel suicidal.
And I closed my eyes whilst I was driving.
I got to a real low point and I thought, "I'’m done."
If it wasn'’t for my family and my close friends,
it'’d have been probably a different story.
During my school life, I was bullied.
People always told me I couldn'’t do something.
Again, since my accident, um,
people have been telling me I can'’t do stuff.
And I wanna prove '’em wrong. Um...
Up until the day I left for this trip,
people have been putting barriers up, walls up.
"You can'’t do this. You shouldn'’t do this.
You'’re gonna cause yourself more damage."
But why not? If I can do it, I can do it now.
Who knows? Later on in life, I won'’t be able to do these things.
I wanna prove people wrong. I love proving people wrong.
And I also want to show other people that they can do it too.
[BELL RINGS]
ED: We had to cross this glacier that was covered by boulders.
And because no one had been there for two years,
everything had moved.
Everything was loose.
And a boulder field is like my worst nightmare when you'’re unstable.
And for Ben as well.
Oh, oh!
- Do you wanna grab that? - Move to the right.
Step quickly...
- [INDISTINCT] - Oh, oh!
- Yeah, boy. - [INDISTINCT]
ED: The level of concentration had to be so high.
Our disabilities or our physical limitations, really,
sort of become more obvious.
OK, OK, OK, OK. No, no, no. Hey, stop, stop, stop, stop.
It'’s OK. It'’s OK.
And became more obvious to the guides as well.
They'’re thinking at that point, "How the hell are these guys
gonna even get ten metres over there, never mind up this mountain?"
[LABOURED BREATHING]
BEN: You really started to feel the effects of the altitude with breathing.
You take three steps and you'’re out of breath.
So there'’s a lot of silent walking.
I taught myself to block any negativity.
On the stick and down.
BEN: I can'’t feel my right leg, so I had to be looking on the ground constantly.
You all right?
BEN: It was hard.
This is ridiculous.
ED: Just mentally the whole time he'’s been talking about the summit.
Yeah, he talks a lot about it, he'’s got a point to prove to people
and he wants to prove people wrong, but we'’re in the mountains,
so it doesn'’t matter who you are,
if she decides to not let us get to the top,
then we won'’t get to the top.
I just worry where his head will be
if he doesn'’t make it to the top.
He'’s pushing himself so hard.
And he'’s just going, "Yeah, I'’m fine, I'’m fine",
when clearly he'’s not.
He'’s really grappling with the frustration
of not being the person he was before.
And it'’s hard to let go of that person.
BEETLE: How are you finding this terrain, Ben?
[BEN LAUGHS] Does that answer your question?
BIGRAJ: Very, very, very difficult.
Horrible day. So I would say this is horrible day.
Very risky. So... very scary for everyone.
ED: Probably the most mentally draining day of my life.
At Camp One, you can, like, look down on the glacier.
And it was just the most incredible place to camp.
It was amazing. We'’d bonded really tightly by that point.
Especially with the guides and the Nepali team.
We woke up early, and that was it,
we were up towards Camp Two.
The first time we'’d put boots and crampons on,
which makes it much more real,
and we head off into the crevasse field.
Back, back, back, back.
- Back, back? - Yeah.
ED: So I was stood on the edge of this crevasse
knowing that there'’s a good chance I could end up
falling into the crevasse.
- I'’m gonna go with my right leg. Ready? - Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
One...
Good, good, good, good!
And just about make it over.
And that was within five minutes of getting on the glacier
and was kind of a sign of things to come.
Ben was finding it a lot harder than the rest of us.
And he was just pushing and pushing and pushing.
I was worried for him.
We'’re likely to get altitude sickness,
so let'’s just slow it down.
Go at a pace that'’s comfortable for you.
We'’re all more than happy to have a rest,
trust me.
BEN: My leg suddenly stopped working.
I was more angry at myself that my leg wasn'’t working.
Really started to annoy me.
Got nothing...
Without this. Let'’s do it.
Oh, come on. Get a grip.
Feel like a turtle.
[COUGHING]
ED: Yeah?
ED: I mean, I was an absolute wreck as well.
It was knee-deep snow most of the time,
and it'’s one step at a time.
And at that altitude,
you'’ve got hardly any oxygen.
Look at that, every step...
every single step.
And we'’ve got to leave in seven hours time...
...to climb to the top of that.
I think I was just, like, I don'’t know how I'’m gonna get up at ten o'’clock
and keep moving.
It'’s so hard.
Just what I need.
I need a Jacko hug.
Well done, boy.
The Nepali guides,
they can skip across the top of it.
Every step, even though I was in their footprints,
that bit lower,
and then no hip flexor to lift out of it.
Yeah, I was swearing at my feet quite a bit.
- Yeah, I had a meltdown. - Yeah, me too, mate.
I had a meltdown as well, don'’t worry.
- Night-night. - Good night.
LOIS: Hello, Eddie, babes. Um...
I just wanted to wish you a huge, huge good luck climbing Himlung.
Barry and I believe that you will get to the top of this mountain.
No? [LAUGHS]
But, in all seriousness,
it doesn'’t matter to me
if you make it to the top.
I am unbelievably proud
to call you my husband.
I'’m so excited for our future together.
And I just can'’t wait to get you back down the mountain and into my arms.
I love you so much.
EVIE: Hi, babe.
Hope you'’re OK and staying safe and warm.
I know that your determination/stubbornness,
um, and your strength and your resilience is a part of you,
and that'’s partly why I love you so much, um,
and I know that that'’s what will get you up the mountain,
but I just want you to remember that there'’s so much more to you than that.
So whatever happens, you'’ve done an amazing, amazing thing.
I really, really love you and I really miss you.
And I can'’t wait to see you when you get back.
ED: I am exhausted. Got just over a thousand metres left.
I have no idea how this is gonna go. Ben, absolutely smashing it.
Struggling too, but so proud of him.
- Boss. - ED: Thank you, Khajou.
We'’ve stepped out of our tents
into the most incredible sky lit up with stars.
We wanted to go across the crevasse field
through the coldness of the night.
The ice is more stable. It'’s much easier for Ed to walk across.
I got up and I just threw up everywhere.
Beetle came out and said, "Ben'’s not well."
And he had had altitude sickness through the night.
Raveen will take him all the way down to Base Camp.
- ED: OK. - Base Camp.
I think better to go all the way down.
ARRON: If you push on with that, and you'’re being sick,
it'’s life or death, really.
That voice of failure started creeping back in again.
But I'’d prepared myself for it.
I did a lot of work beforehand of
I can'’t control the altitude sickness, couldn'’t control the weather,
so if the weather changed, then we couldn'’t get there.
These things are out of my control.
I remember going into his tent and just saying,
"Listen, mate, you'’ve got to 6,000 metres.
You'’re the only other person with a spinal cord injury to ever do that.
Before this, you haven'’t even climbed anything higher than Ben Nevis.
Like, it'’s a bit ridiculous that you'’re even here, to be honest.
You should be so proud of what you'’ve done."
And you know what, he looked at me
and he was like... he was like, "It'’s fine."
And I could tell he was fine with it. And I was just so relieved.
See you in a couple of days.
[CHUCKLES]
BEN: Ed'’s the highest. I'’m the second highest.
So I'’ve accomplished what I wanted.
I'’ve proved people wrong who told me I couldn'’t do it.
Rather than looked at what he couldn'’t do,
he was looking at what he can do.
And I walked off into the night with the other guys there
just with a big smile on my face.
Oh, shit...
Do you want me to pull that one as well?
ED: No, I should be all right on this one.
ED: About two hours in,
I fell straight through a crevasse.
Got up and fell straight into another crevasse.
Man, is this whole thing a crevasse?
And that'’s when I realised that we were surrounded by them
but effectively walking over the top of them.
[GRUNTS]
No.
Oh. I'’m in there.
I can'’t get my leg out of there.
ED: Six hours into our summit attempt,
the sun had started to come up.
We started the sort of steep ascent.
It didn'’t feel like you'’re getting any closer to the top.
[LABOURED BREATHING]
I remember checking with the guide, "How high are we?"
And he was like, "We'’re at about 6,800 metres."
I was now higher than I'’d ever been before.
OK, so we'’ve been going for nine hours.
It'’s fair to say, it is by far the hardest thing any of us have ever done.
I'’m only 300 vertical metres short of the summit.
But that could be four or five hours. I knew Arron wouldn'’t turn round.
So I knew I was responsible for him as well.
ARRON: When Ed finally collapsed onto his knees, he started crying.
He was at complete breaking point.
My body won'’t let me do anymore...
ARRON: I have never seen him there before.
He had pushed it to his absolute limit.
I am done, and I'’m doing it with two legs, mate.
I'’ve pushed it so hard.
Fuck.
No, that'’s it, that'’s it...
I'’m done...
So we'’ve decided that we will have to abandon the summit attempt.
ED: It wasn'’t until I'’d made that decision and pointed downhill,
I thought, "Oh, my God, I can'’t walk."
All of a sudden, my quad that I'’d been working so hard all the way up there
was just shaking cos it'’s now facing down the hill.
And I realised it was gonna be just as hard to get down the mountain
as it was to get to the point where we'’d got up.
[YELLS]
Climbing down to the shoulder took about six hours.
I was just doing everything I had to do
to get down the mountain.
We got down to the bottom of the shoulder
to where the crevasse field was.
We were sat there resting. I'’m absolutely exhausted.
Like, to the point where I can'’t speak any more and my body'’s shaking.
But I know we'’ve got to cross this glacier to get back to Camp Two.
[WIND HOWLING]
We'’re sat there, and we realise that all of the snow
that we had walked across at night, the night before, that was frozen,
was now soft and we were surrounded by crevasses.
Bigraj managed to get through to the helicopter company on the satphone.
They said, "We can'’t get to you. You'’re gonna have to wait till the morning."
- BEETLE: So... - ARRON: We'’re all huddling for warmth.
BEETLE: ...it'’s ten past midnight. Ed'’s not in a good nick.
ED: We were facing night on the mountain at minus 20, minus 30, probably, degrees.
And it was just gonna be survival.
Very lucky Bigraj was there, very lucky Arron was there...
Wait a second.
Gotta get some blood out. Or spit. Whatever it is.
...to make rational decisions at that point.
I was almost fitting.
Ed, this will help with the breathing, mate.
[COUGHS]
All right.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]
ED: We'’d do some breath work with Arron,
and then we'’d do some tensing,
and just keep each other awake.
ARRON: About 7:30 a.m. Bigraj went on the satphone
and he called the helicopter, and they said, yes, they'’re coming up.
ED: That sound of the chopper coming up the valley,
just unbelievable sense of relief.
BEN: Ed came back.
And Ed, oh, Jesus Christ, Ed looked really bad.
His lips were all scabbed,
his nose was scabby where it was all burnt.
ED: The first thing I remember is Ben running over
and me just giving him a big hug,
and the look on his face and how happy he was.
BEN: I hugged him and I said, "Are you all right?"
He said, "That was epic."
I looked at him and just laughed.
So, yeah, that... that sums up Ed, I think.
Excuse the feralness.
I'’ve just had my first wash, uh, in five days, six days.
Um, yeah, we got back to a very nervous camp this morning.
They'’d put up all the prayer flags and kept the fire burning for us.
So, very sweet, but also very humbling at the same time.
Obviously it hasn'’t all sunk in yet.
I think there was something higher watching over us that day.
The respect I have and we have for the mountain,
and showed to the mountain throughout our whole trip,
I feel very grateful to have experienced what we experienced.
But I also feel very lucky that we made it back.
It'’s not something I would want
to repeat in a heartbeat or choose to,
but it'’s also something I definitely, definitely don'’t regret.
I think every time that I come close to death,
which has happened a couple of times now...
you just realise how lucky you are
to be alive in the first place.
And it'’s something that...
I definitely took for granted before.
INTERVIEWER: That trip really did change your life.
It has changed my life, yeah, massively, yeah.
All for the better. Yeah.
And I can'’t thank Ed or Lois enough for what they'’ve done.
My stress levels have gone so low.
What stuff I'’d usually get angry at, or snap at...
I just... I just... I took Ed'’s attitude of... "Bothered".
I'’ve accepted that the accident'’s happened.
I accepted that my injuries are what they are now.
I don'’t wanna be setting on to the next goal straightaway.
I just wanna enjoy and think,
"Oh, my God, what have I done? What have I achieved?"
And enjoy telling the story, to be honest.
LOIS: I could see straightaway how much that trip had changed their lives.
Ed realigned what he wants to do
and where he wants to go and the values that he lives by.
Only accepting work that is true to him
and that is actually gonna get him closer
to the deeper things he wants to do, not the superficial.
- Do you wanna go through this? - Yeah.
Last year, we decided
that we wanted to help impact more people, basically.
We had so many applications and people getting in touch,
but we kind of wanted to stick true
to our approach of really changing someone'’s life.
And with that in mind, you can'’t impact
a thousand people at the same time.
ARRON: Trying to watch the hand.
ED: By changing fewer people'’s lives significantly,
the ripple effect is they then go on and help other people.
But also their stories being told
means that other people can see that
to take inspiration from it.
We wanted to create actual events around the country
that more people can get involved with,
and that'’s Together Outdoors.
So it'’s like a network, started from a Facebook group,
where people who have been through trauma
can get in contact with each other in their areas
and go on organised walks.
I'’m really proud of both of them. They work so hard.
They play hard as well, but they work so hard.
In the office, outside, focused on it.
[CHEERING]
Honestly, I think this whole sequence of events
has strengthened their relationship
rather than what sadly often happens,
which is weaken and destroys it.
They'’re both very passionate about what they'’re doing.
I mean, you can see, they enjoy it.
[CHEERING]
[LOIS LAUGHS]
They can see what a difference it'’s making to people.
[CHEERING]
Positive emotion is very healing.
People are more likely to get better from an illness
if they are positive in themselves
and are surrounded by people who feed positivity into them.
LOIS: Yes, Jen! Fist bump!
- I can'’t believe it. - Yes!
MARK: It'’s fairly obvious, but it is true.
With all the charity work I do, all the mentoring I'’m doing,
it'’s still healing me.
LOIS: How are you feeling about the climb with Leo and Waldo?
- I'’m excited. - Yeah?
I mean, scared, but excited.
Yeah, I think it'’s one of those which is really gonna...
it'’s right on the limit of...
I mean, it'’s beyond my technical ability already.
LOIS: I still question why you do these things.
There'’s a number of reasons.
It obviously helps me psychologically
keep up with all the training.
- Mmm. - Which is big.
And hopefully keeps inspiring other people
to sort of push their own boundaries.
[BIRD SCREECHES]
Now it'’s sunk in from Nepal, it'’s more doing things
that are, like, risky and hard but not reckless.
LOIS: Yeah.
Love you.
Rock climbing'’s not an adrenaline sport.
It'’s not about getting an adrenaline hit.
It'’s too painful and too drawn-out for that.
There'’s unquestionably, for me at least, a spiritual element.
It'’s no coincidence
that most of the best climbing areas in the world
are national parks.
These environments, these big rocky features, are majestic.
They'’re... They'’re beautiful.
They'’re awesome places to... to hang out.
Yeah, wow.
I have... I still cannot contemplate
how the hell I'’m gonna end up on top of that.
But I have complete faith in the people I'’m with.
And Leo says it'’s possible.
LEO: Ed'’s gotta get himself up there.
All I'’m gonna do is minimise the risk. He'’s kind of on his own.
It'’s a real, like, knife-edge ridge, so it'’s hyper-exposed.
It'’s like the most scary environment.
But the challenge, I think it'’s just about
the perfect level for where he is now.
Being rubbish at something and being around people who are great at it,
and every day my improvement curve'’s like this,
I'’m learning so much.
That curve'’s never been as steep since my accident.
I had to learn to walk again and learn to...
Like, every day'’s a school day at the moment.
[EXHALES] So, it'’s 6 a.m.
The morning of climbing that thing behind me.
I don'’t know.
Really excited. Adrenaline.
Like, I feel like I'’ve got pre-match nerves.
It feels like that same feeling like before a rugby match,
but almost more intense because it'’s so much more unknown.
When I was gonna play rugby, I knew it was gonna hurt.
God, I love it out here.
It wasn'’t like I broke my neck and I was gonna be quadriplegic.
It wasn'’t like, "OK, now I'’m just gonna crack on.
It'’s fine. I'’ll sort it out."
It wasn'’t. It'’s been a process.
It definitely has.
It'’s kind of realising that you have to just focus on what you can do
and what is positive in your life.
Because if you focus on the negative side,
it'’ll eat you up.
Nice one.
ED: I could still be at the bottom of that pool.
You know, I'’m very lucky that I didn'’t die.
I do get those flashes of, "Oh, that'’s annoying" or "Ow, that hurts"
or "That takes a long time", and I have those daily.
But... I mean, not just daily, but almost hourly.
But that moment of frustration is fleeting,
cos my brain almost subconsciously reframes it to,
"No, come on, get on with it. That'’s not gonna be helpful for you."
LEO: So this is where we'’ll gear up.
Yeah. I think maybe a little bit looser.
Just so that I can grab it when it'’s further away. Yeah, that'’ll be good.
This is a way of me being able to grab
and move my foot around and place it on the rock.
Works in principle.
LEO: Ready?
- LEO: Obviously, there'’s a physical challenge to it. - ED: Fuck.
LEO: And a psychological challenge. It'’s scary.
Everyone'’s scared of heights. But there'’s also another element.
- Heart is going. - LEO: Climbing is a cerebral challenge.
It'’s like a problem solving. It'’s like a Rubik'’s Cube.
You have to figure out how to use the tools at your disposal,
your fingers and your toes and your appendages,
to overcome this challenge of getting up the rock face.
It'’s a very deep thing. It'’s very emotional.
And there'’s sort of a clarity to it
where you really have to concentrate.
You really have to focus on the task at hand.
So you have to be present and in the moment.
So it'’s almost like a form of meditation.
[GRUNTS]
There'’s just nothing to really hold on to.
Whoa... I slipped...
- OK. - It'’s all right.
It'’s not like there'’s a massive drop down there.
Yes! Good start.
- [ED EXHALES] - [LEO LAUGHS]
- That was the first course, the starter. - ED: Yeah.
- LEO: This is the main meal. - Yeah. No shit.
- LEO: Keep it really slack, yeah? - Yeah.
ED: This bit'’s gonna be difficult.
I'’ve got to try and get my left leg over.
That'’s the leg that doesn'’t like to work.
LEO: This is gonna be quite tricky as well.
That'’s climber talk for, "You'’re gonna have a really hard time."
ED: Yeah, yeah, OK. Quite tricky. Like it.
- Mmm. One sec. - LEO: Pay attention.
ED: Good?
A thousand-foot drop either side. Looks pretty terrifying.
Honestly, my heart is going like the clappers.
I don'’t know how long I can keep this...
keep this adrenaline going.
Right, come on. Come on, you got this.
Steady as she goes.
If my spinal cord injury was complete,
which I thought it was, which I was told it was,
then it wouldn'’t matter how hard I would work, I would never be here.
Unless someone dropped me off in a helicopter.
I would love to have shaken the old Ed and been like,
"Do you realise how lucky you are to just be alive?"
I think that I'’ve replaced a life with a better life.
Yeah, that seems to be working.
Let'’s put my...
- LEO: Claw jam. - Claw jam. There it is.
- That'’s a unique climb. - The claw, mate. The claw.
It'’s just where my right leg goes to, that'’s the thing.
LEO: The footholds aren'’t very good.
There'’s a really good handhold up there, though.
Yeah. Gotta get the claw out of the jam now.
Get out of there. OK.
[EXHALES]
[GRUNTS]
Oh, I'’ve got a spasm in that leg.
Start bending it. And break the spasm.
OK. That'’s a tiny ledge.
Oh, I'’ve got my right foot stuck.
Ah. Foot'’s stuck in the crack.
Right. Try something else.
Ooh, no...
I'’m not gonna be able to get my left there, that'’s the problem.
Wait a minute. OK. Maybe if I go with my left in there.
My left leg is now higher than it'’s pretty much ever been,
so I don'’t even know if I'’ll get any traction on it, but...
- Is it on something? - Yeah.
- Hopefully it'’s steady. - Go for it.
Um...
You push down with that hand. Yes! Yes!
[GRUNTS]
Big holds coming up for your hands.
ED: Yeah, my foot slipped out, though.
- Go high with your right hand. - My left foot slipped out. Oh, yeah.
Yes! Yes! Get your knee on.
There you go. A bit higher. That'’s it.
[LABOURED BREATHING]
My God, I feel like I'’m gonna have a heart attack.
LEO: Try not to.
ED: Yeah.
[WIND HOWLING]
LEO: You'’re nearly there.
Yeah, unclip now.
- Easy now. - Phwoar.
ED: Not sure about the exposure, though.
[LABOURED BREATHING]
[LAUGHS]
- Oh, my God. - Yeah, that'’s the top!
ED: Oh...
Oh, my God. Yes!
Oh!
- There you go. - [EXHALES]
That was... That was one of the most intense experiences of my life.
- You did it. - Thank you so much, mate.
You did it without... You free climbed it.
That'’s gonna take a while to sink in.
Yeah, who'’d have thought it five years ago, eh?
Oh, mate.
- Yeah. Getting a bit emotional. - So am I.
- Thank you, mate. - No, it'’s such a pleasure to share it.
Mate, it'’s such a beautiful place as well.
Yeah. Yeah. It'’s all too much to take in, really.
Not just that, but, like, the whole, "How am I stood up here?"
- Well done, Ed. - Thanks, man.
- You should be very proud of that. - We made it.
What a summit it is. I cannot believe what we just did.
Well, what I just did. It was easy for Leo.
Everyone on that whole journey that got me to that point,
my surgeon, my physios, stood on top of that mountain looking out.
And I feel very grateful to all of them, you know.
Been very lucky to meet some amazing people
that have done some incredible things for me and I just...
and it all seemed to culminate in that terrifying moment.
LOIS: I think that you do gather a whole new perspective
when you have gone through a life-changing incident,
when you have nearly died, and I can feel that from him.
And you know what? It'’s contagious. He gives that off.
It'’s changed my perspective.
I definitely believe that you can change your mindset
and live a happy, positive life.
I would say I'’m living proof that you can.
ED: Most of our suffering is dealt by ourselves, to ourselves.
I think, at the end of the day, it comes down to an ability to let go,
because we can'’t change what'’s happened to us,
so reliving it and replaying it over and over again
and living in the past is just causing us more hurt and pain.
And if we can stay in the present moment,
not fear too much about the future and just live our lives
like it'’s a gift to even be there in the first place,
then that would alleviate so much suffering.
LOIS: You'’ve got two sticks. You can'’t hold my hand.
ED: I think one of the best ways to do that
is to start doing things for each other.
You know, just be kind, be nice.
It doesn'’t... It doesn'’t cost anything.
And those ripple effects make such a big difference.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[LOIS LAUGHS]
[♪ JIMMY BARNES: "AIN'’T NO MOUNTAIN HIGH ENOUGH"]
♪ Listen, babe, ain'’t no mountain high Ain'’t no valley low ♪
♪ Ain'’t no river wide enough, baby ♪
♪ If you need me, call ♪
♪ No matter where you are No matter how far ♪
♪ Don'’t worry, baby Just call my name ♪
♪ I'’ll be there in a hurry You don'’t have to worry ♪
♪ Cos, baby, there ain'’t no mountain high enough ♪
♪ Ain'’t no valley low enough ♪
♪ Ain'’t no river wide enough ♪
♪ To keep me from getting to you, babe ♪
♪ Cos you know that there ain'’t no mountain high enough ♪
♪ Ain'’t no valley low enough ♪
♪ Well, ain'’t no river wide enough ♪
♪ To keep me from getting to you, babe ♪
♪ Oh, no, darlin'’ No wind, no rain ♪