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(no audio)

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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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(upbeat music)

5
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Tell you what, I am amped
about this party Friday night.

6
00:01:41,792 --> 00:01:43,333
I hear there’s gonna be two bands.

7
00:01:43,375 --> 00:01:44,250
No shit?

8
00:01:44,292 --> 00:01:46,625
Time for some of the old electric shutter slide.

9
00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:50,625
The electric fucking what?

10
00:01:51,917 --> 00:01:53,500
You gonna come, Tom?

11
00:01:53,542 --> 00:01:56,208
Hey Tommy, you coming with
us to Nick’s party Friday night?

12
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,500
Uh, I don’t know.

13
00:01:57,542 --> 00:01:58,292
He’ll come.

14
00:01:58,375 --> 00:01:59,167
He fucking better.

15
00:02:00,667 --> 00:02:02,000
I wish somebody would tell me

16
00:02:02,042 --> 00:02:04,542
why I signed up for this 19th century lit class.

17
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:05,333
Lot of reading?

18
00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,125
Fuck, yeah.

19
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,375
What are you reading?

20
00:02:07,625 --> 00:02:08,958
I don't know, uh...

21
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,000
Moldy dick, for one.

22
00:02:11,417 --> 00:02:12,125
Moldy Dick.

23
00:02:12,167 --> 00:02:14,833
Which is what I'm gonna have
if I have to read the whole book

24
00:02:14,875 --> 00:02:16,459
A moldy dick. No time for better things.

25
00:02:17,542 --> 00:02:18,142
Pig.

26
00:02:18,209 --> 00:02:19,000
Alright, what else?

27
00:02:19,042 --> 00:02:21,667
Uh, lots of French shit.

28
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:22,875
“Les Miserables”.

29
00:02:22,917 --> 00:02:24,000
Les Miserables.

30
00:02:24,084 --> 00:02:25,917
But that's cool because I can watch the movie.

31
00:02:25,959 --> 00:02:27,750
Angelina Jolie is hot.

32
00:02:28,167 --> 00:02:29,542
I'm pretty sure she's not in it.

33
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:30,875
She won an Oscar.

34
00:02:31,542 --> 00:02:33,167
That was Anne Hathaway, douche.

35
00:02:33,625 --> 00:02:34,750
Well, she's hot, too.

36
00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:38,375
Then there's books by two Frenchies
named Dumb Ass and Scrotum.

37
00:02:38,750 --> 00:02:40,042
Dumb Ass...

38
00:02:40,125 --> 00:02:41,333
Alexander Duma?

39
00:02:41,375 --> 00:02:42,125
Duma...

40
00:02:42,167 --> 00:02:43,333
Looks like dumb ass to me.

41
00:02:43,375 --> 00:02:47,375
You know, I am 100% certain there
is no French author name scrotum.

42
00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:48,292
That's his name.

43
00:02:48,375 --> 00:02:49,375
Then what did he write?

44
00:02:49,417 --> 00:02:50,833
I don't know, uh...

45
00:02:50,875 --> 00:02:53,292
oh wait... Cousin Buffy?

46
00:02:53,875 --> 00:02:54,833
Is it about vampires?

47
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:56,250
Yeah. No.

48
00:02:56,292 --> 00:02:57,625
Cousin Bette.

49
00:02:57,667 --> 00:02:58,292
Oh yeah.

50
00:02:58,375 --> 00:02:59,542
Honoré de Balzac.

51
00:02:59,750 --> 00:03:01,167
That’s what I said, ballsack.

52
00:03:01,250 --> 00:03:02,542
Hmm, you said scrotum.

53
00:03:02,625 --> 00:03:06,042
Okay, Ballsack, scrotum, same
thing. Who names their kid Ballsack?

54
00:03:06,125 --> 00:03:09,125
Mr and Mrs. Balzac, I imagine!

55
00:03:10,375 --> 00:03:12,875
So, Tom, about Nick's party.

56
00:03:15,250 --> 00:03:17,292
I'm not sure if I'm really feeling it.

57
00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:20,542
Thomas, my friend. What is with you lately?

58
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,167
I just don't really know who I am anymore.

59
00:03:23,250 --> 00:03:23,875
Oh...

60
00:03:24,750 --> 00:03:25,417
Oh.

61
00:03:25,542 --> 00:03:27,542
Kids in crisis next right here on Fox.

62
00:03:27,625 --> 00:03:29,167
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

63
00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:33,167
I don't know who I am.

64
00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:36,584
For Christ's sake, that’s what my roommate
said yesterday when he told me he was gay.

65
00:03:37,292 --> 00:03:38,292
Sean's gay?

66
00:03:38,375 --> 00:03:41,625
Uh, oops. Yeah, he is.

67
00:03:41,667 --> 00:03:45,542
But I'm not supposed to tell
anybody, so keep your mouths shut.

68
00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:46,333
No kidding.

69
00:03:46,375 --> 00:03:47,458
Huh.

70
00:03:47,500 --> 00:03:50,959
But, Tom, if you're trying to tell
us that you're gay, don't worry.

71
00:03:51,042 --> 00:03:52,583
Andy and I will still be your friends.

72
00:03:52,625 --> 00:03:53,375
Hey, listen, guys-

73
00:03:53,417 --> 00:03:55,167
Hey, if he is gay, I’ll bone him.

74
00:03:55,250 --> 00:03:56,583
Shut up, you pig.

75
00:03:56,625 --> 00:04:00,417
Hey, any port in a storm, as the sailor said to the... cow.

76
00:04:01,292 --> 00:04:03,917
And the Animal of the Year award goes to...

77
00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:06,958
Andy Detweiler!

78
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,292
Thank you, thank you, thank you.

79
00:04:08,375 --> 00:04:11,417
First and foremost I would like to
thank all the little people who made this-

80
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,083
Guys, I’m not gay.

81
00:04:13,125 --> 00:04:14,083
You’re not?

82
00:04:14,125 --> 00:04:15,625
Well, at least I don’t think I am.

83
00:04:15,667 --> 00:04:17,500
So what's this major malfunction all about?

84
00:04:17,542 --> 00:04:20,042
I told you, I don't know who I am anymore.

85
00:04:20,125 --> 00:04:22,834
Yeah, but what the fuck's that supposed to mean?

86
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,417
Look, okay, um...

87
00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:27,792
This morning after class, I went to the bathroom.

88
00:04:27,875 --> 00:04:29,458
Hey, none of us was born solid.

89
00:04:29,500 --> 00:04:32,875
And I stopped, and I looked at myself in the mirror.

90
00:04:32,917 --> 00:04:34,334
That face would freak anybody out.

91
00:04:34,417 --> 00:04:36,542
Andy, could you possibly,

92
00:04:36,625 --> 00:04:41,667
I mean, you know, hypothetically,
keep your mouth shut for just one minute?

93
00:04:42,125 --> 00:04:43,917
Anyway, I got a good look at myself,

94
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,083
and I realized that I looked the
same as I did when I was five.

95
00:04:47,125 --> 00:04:48,250
What the fuck?

96
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:49,667
Dude.

97
00:04:49,750 --> 00:04:53,750
Like the same combed hair and lost expression.

98
00:04:54,750 --> 00:05:00,333
And then there was this flash
of light that eclipsed the mirror.

99
00:05:00,375 --> 00:05:03,042
Dude, what the fuck were you smoking?

100
00:05:03,125 --> 00:05:04,042
Anyway...

101
00:05:04,750 --> 00:05:05,792
Nothing much has changed.

102
00:05:05,875 --> 00:05:07,875
I’m just like I was back then.

103
00:05:08,250 --> 00:05:09,292
Like how, Tom?

104
00:05:09,375 --> 00:05:13,917
Lost, or immobilized, like um...

105
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:15,250
a broke down car.

106
00:05:15,750 --> 00:05:17,667
Lost and immobilized? Huh...

107
00:05:18,500 --> 00:05:19,500
Sounds like my car.

108
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,792
One more time,

109
00:05:21,875 --> 00:05:23,333
shut the fuck up!

110
00:05:23,375 --> 00:05:24,958
Okay, okay...

111
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,667
I'm listening, I swear.

112
00:05:26,917 --> 00:05:29,792
It's like I'm getting through
the day on minimal repairs,

113
00:05:29,875 --> 00:05:33,875
but then my only escape is sleeping.

114
00:05:33,917 --> 00:05:39,917
But then my dreams are like
these grainy eight millimeter films

115
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:43,583
with these with, like, lurid fragments of color

116
00:05:43,625 --> 00:05:46,375
and emotion that just kind of like, pop in and-

117
00:05:46,417 --> 00:05:50,208
Damn dude! Whatever you are smoking must be sweet.

118
00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:51,667
Shut the fuck up, Mike.

119
00:05:51,750 --> 00:05:53,375
I mean, for one thing,

120
00:05:54,250 --> 00:05:56,333
I can't get into studying this semester.

121
00:05:56,375 --> 00:05:57,625
Join the club.

122
00:05:57,667 --> 00:05:59,500
And I hate my major.

123
00:05:59,542 --> 00:06:00,250
So change it.

124
00:06:00,292 --> 00:06:02,667
Hell, yeah. I've changed mine five times already.

125
00:06:02,750 --> 00:06:03,833
It's not that easy.

126
00:06:03,875 --> 00:06:06,042
- Yeah it is. You just go to an advisor. - No, no, no.

127
00:06:06,125 --> 00:06:09,542
My dad has been telling everyone since
I was a kid that I'm going to be a doctor.

128
00:06:09,917 --> 00:06:12,333
My dad's been telling everyone I'm gonna go to jail.

129
00:06:12,375 --> 00:06:13,125
Look at me.

130
00:06:13,417 --> 00:06:14,792
There’s still plenty of time, Mike.

131
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,000
I can't just quit now.

132
00:06:17,042 --> 00:06:19,042
It would hurt him. I mean, he's counting on it.

133
00:06:19,292 --> 00:06:20,833
It's your life, man.

134
00:06:20,875 --> 00:06:22,500
I don't even know what I want to do.

135
00:06:22,542 --> 00:06:24,750
There are only three things to do.

136
00:06:24,792 --> 00:06:27,542
Get drunk, get stoned, get laid.

137
00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:29,458
You forgot one.

138
00:06:29,500 --> 00:06:30,167
Get rich.

139
00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:31,542
Oh yeah, that too.

140
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:38,083
It's like I'm drowning in an ocean of uncertainty-

141
00:06:38,125 --> 00:06:39,833
Jesus, Tommy, get a fucking grip.

142
00:06:39,875 --> 00:06:42,667
Hating your major’s not that bad. Look at me.

143
00:06:42,750 --> 00:06:45,125
I'm flunking math for the fourth time.

144
00:06:45,625 --> 00:06:47,000
I got a four point in math.

145
00:06:47,417 --> 00:06:50,125
Okay, only because you were
boning the graduate assistant, dude.

146
00:06:50,292 --> 00:06:52,000
You think I'd use my dick to get a grade?

147
00:06:52,042 --> 00:06:54,208
All I know is that she looked like a duck’s ass,

148
00:06:54,250 --> 00:06:56,375
plus, you dropped her the minute you got your grade.

149
00:06:57,167 --> 00:06:58,875
You're just jealous you didn't think of it.

150
00:06:58,917 --> 00:07:01,125
Oh, uh, some of us have standards, fuckhead.

151
00:07:01,167 --> 00:07:03,250
Oh, you want to talk about standards?

152
00:07:03,292 --> 00:07:05,292
How about Sheila Montrose?

153
00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,667
Okay, wait a minute.

154
00:07:07,750 --> 00:07:09,292
Rewind.

155
00:07:09,375 --> 00:07:11,375
You know, I was drunk that night.

156
00:07:11,417 --> 00:07:13,208
You must have been real drunk.

157
00:07:13,250 --> 00:07:16,292
I mean, Sheila Montrose?

158
00:07:16,375 --> 00:07:18,083
I mean, were you there that night?

159
00:07:18,125 --> 00:07:19,042
Yeah, yeah.

160
00:07:19,125 --> 00:07:22,417
Anyway, I told you never to mention Sheila Montrose.

161
00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:26,958
That's what you need, Tom,
my lad. To get well and truly laid.

162
00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:27,625
Yeah.

163
00:07:27,709 --> 00:07:29,750
Hey, how did that date we set up for you work out?

164
00:07:29,792 --> 00:07:31,417
Yeah, with um...

165
00:07:31,500 --> 00:07:33,000
Sophia?

166
00:07:33,042 --> 00:07:34,500
Now that chick's as brainy as you.

167
00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:36,459
Yeah, we didn't really have much to talk about.

168
00:07:36,875 --> 00:07:38,125
Talk?

169
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:41,833
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

170
00:07:41,875 --> 00:07:44,000
You were supposed to bone her!

171
00:07:44,042 --> 00:07:47,250
I mean, we just kind of sat around and
watched old episodes of “The X-Files.”

172
00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:48,417
Oh, I love that show.

173
00:07:48,875 --> 00:07:51,458
Damn, dude! No wonder you're depressed!

174
00:07:51,500 --> 00:07:54,708
Have you guys seen the episode
where Scully gets kissed by a zombie?

175
00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:59,542
Anyway, I don't really think that
having a girl is going to tell me who I am.

176
00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:03,167
Maybe not, but, it would sure
help you get your mind off things.

177
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:06,500
Yeah, so would a few hits, bro. Hey,
let's go to my place and get hammered.

178
00:08:06,542 --> 00:08:07,792
No, I got to go to the library.

179
00:08:07,875 --> 00:08:09,500
You read way too much!

180
00:08:09,542 --> 00:08:10,458
No, I’ve got to study.

181
00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:11,625
We’ll get high first!

182
00:08:12,167 --> 00:08:13,917
You can't study when you're high.

183
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,375
I always get high before I do my math homework.

184
00:08:16,625 --> 00:08:17,917
I rest my case.

185
00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:20,250
Hey, guys, wait a minute.

186
00:08:21,917 --> 00:08:23,417
You guys want to hear a real problem?

187
00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:25,625
Uh-oh. Busted condom time.

188
00:08:25,917 --> 00:08:29,625
My mom's been sleeping with somebody
who's only two years older than me.

189
00:08:29,792 --> 00:08:30,392
No shit.

190
00:08:30,459 --> 00:08:31,084
No way.

191
00:08:31,167 --> 00:08:33,375
Fuck man, I mean, how do you think that makes me feel?

192
00:08:33,750 --> 00:08:35,167
Your mom's a fox, bro.

193
00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:36,417
Shut up, Andy!

194
00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:38,542
I wouldn’t mind boning her myself!

195
00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:42,542
That's it, Tom. You need to go to the library.

196
00:08:42,625 --> 00:08:45,209
I'm gonna take Andy out in the
alley and beat the crap out of him.

197
00:08:45,292 --> 00:08:46,458
Uh, yeah, I should go.

198
00:08:46,500 --> 00:08:49,125
Hey, don't let it get you down, man.

199
00:08:49,167 --> 00:08:52,375
Yeah, and you know if you need
anything Andy and I will be here.

200
00:08:52,667 --> 00:08:54,875
Thanks guys, I really appreciate it.

201
00:08:54,917 --> 00:08:55,750
Yeah.

202
00:08:56,375 --> 00:08:58,125
Yeah, we love you, man.

203
00:08:58,209 --> 00:08:58,833
Okay.

204
00:08:58,875 --> 00:09:00,667
And don't forget about Nick's party.

205
00:09:00,750 --> 00:09:01,417
Yeah, sure.

206
00:09:04,375 --> 00:09:06,375
So...

207
00:09:06,417 --> 00:09:08,667
You boning Sean or what?

208
00:09:08,750 --> 00:09:09,350
Hey!

209
00:09:11,042 --> 00:09:15,042
(upbeat music)

210
00:10:20,417 --> 00:10:22,042
Do you believe in fate?

211
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,000
Excuse me?

212
00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:26,500
I asked if you believe in fate.

213
00:10:27,375 --> 00:10:29,000
No, not really.

214
00:10:30,167 --> 00:10:31,750
Are you afraid of the dark?

215
00:10:32,417 --> 00:10:33,542
What? The...

216
00:10:33,625 --> 00:10:35,083
Look, I don't have time for a poll.

217
00:10:35,125 --> 00:10:36,458
I’ve got to study.

218
00:10:36,500 --> 00:10:37,417
Well, are you?

219
00:10:38,625 --> 00:10:39,542
Afraid of the dark?

220
00:10:39,625 --> 00:10:40,750
Yeah.

221
00:10:40,792 --> 00:10:41,875
Um...

222
00:10:41,917 --> 00:10:43,333
No.

223
00:10:43,375 --> 00:10:45,875
Could you, like, go?

224
00:10:46,375 --> 00:10:47,542
I'm Madeleine.

225
00:10:48,875 --> 00:10:49,750
Hi.

226
00:10:50,375 --> 00:10:51,375
What's your name?

227
00:10:52,500 --> 00:10:53,250
Tom.

228
00:10:54,167 --> 00:10:55,375
Look, I really got to-

229
00:10:55,417 --> 00:10:56,125
You're a Virgo.

230
00:10:57,750 --> 00:10:58,500
What?

231
00:10:58,792 --> 00:10:59,875
When's your birthday?

232
00:11:00,250 --> 00:11:01,583
August 24th.

233
00:11:01,625 --> 00:11:02,583
See, you’re a Virgo.

234
00:11:02,625 --> 00:11:03,750
What did I tell you?

235
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:05,875
How’d you know that?

236
00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:07,625
Well, easy.

237
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:10,167
Virgos always pretend that
they don't believe in fate

238
00:11:10,250 --> 00:11:11,875
and they're not afraid of the dark.

239
00:11:12,042 --> 00:11:14,917
Well, okay. I happen to not be pretending.

240
00:11:15,625 --> 00:11:16,792
We’ll see.

241
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,875
Do you want to go grab a coffee?

242
00:11:22,375 --> 00:11:25,208
Like I said, I’ve got to study.

243
00:11:25,250 --> 00:11:27,750
Well, you weren't studying when I sat down.

244
00:11:27,792 --> 00:11:30,208
Well, I was thinking.

245
00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:31,625
Coffee helps you think.

246
00:11:38,667 --> 00:11:39,542
Okay.

247
00:11:39,625 --> 00:11:40,875
Yeah, sure.

248
00:11:40,917 --> 00:11:41,792
Where to?

249
00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:42,875
Follow me.

250
00:11:46,417 --> 00:11:47,667
Wait, isn't that your stuff?

251
00:11:51,792 --> 00:11:56,125
Nope. I just, um... I just kind of found it there.

252
00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:59,125
Okay.

253
00:12:15,542 --> 00:12:17,500
You Virgos are so interesting.

254
00:12:18,750 --> 00:12:20,667
How so?

255
00:12:20,750 --> 00:12:23,708
Well, for instance, you always
imagine you know yourselves so well,

256
00:12:23,750 --> 00:12:27,208
but then you keep getting lost all the time.

257
00:12:27,250 --> 00:12:28,917
Lost?

258
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,000
Yeah.

259
00:12:30,042 --> 00:12:33,750
When I walked by you in the
library, I thought you looked lost.

260
00:12:33,792 --> 00:12:35,917
Oh, no, I was um... I was just...

261
00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:37,583
Thinking?

262
00:12:37,625 --> 00:12:40,125
I know.

263
00:12:40,167 --> 00:12:43,208
Have you had any strange dreams lately?

264
00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:44,250
No.

265
00:12:44,292 --> 00:12:46,208
I don't, I don’t really dream all that much.

266
00:12:46,250 --> 00:12:48,292
Dreams are so important.

267
00:12:48,375 --> 00:12:49,500
I mean, they're just dreams.

268
00:12:49,542 --> 00:12:51,542
No, especially to Virgos.

269
00:12:51,625 --> 00:12:53,083
Okay,

270
00:12:53,125 --> 00:12:58,417
Look, Madeleine, I don't really
believe in any of this astrology stuff.

271
00:12:58,500 --> 00:13:00,167
Yeah, I can tell that.

272
00:13:00,250 --> 00:13:03,042
I mean it's just a load of crap.

273
00:13:03,125 --> 00:13:05,708
Someday I'll cast your horoscope.

274
00:13:05,750 --> 00:13:07,167
It's a waste of time.

275
00:13:07,250 --> 00:13:09,125
Has anyone ever read the tarot for you?

276
00:13:09,167 --> 00:13:10,833
No.

277
00:13:10,875 --> 00:13:13,542
But, I-you know, I did do a Ouija board once though.

278
00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:18,333
It was a joke. It was a joke.

279
00:13:18,375 --> 00:13:20,208
Hey, I have an idea.

280
00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:23,583
Why don't you come on over to my
place and I'll read the tarot for you?

281
00:13:23,625 --> 00:13:25,625
Why? I don’t believe in any of it.

282
00:13:25,667 --> 00:13:28,667
I know, but come on. It'll be fun.

283
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:33,000
Come on.

284
00:13:35,750 --> 00:13:36,667
Alright.

285
00:13:36,750 --> 00:13:38,208
I suppose it couldn't hurt.

286
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:41,167
But I warn you, I don't believe in sex on the first date.

287
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:42,875
Oh...

288
00:13:42,917 --> 00:13:44,167
I mean...

289
00:13:44,250 --> 00:13:45,250
neither do I. I...

290
00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:47,375
Look, it's not that I'm not attracted to you.

291
00:13:47,417 --> 00:13:48,625
You do have a cute butt.

292
00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:52,417
Thank you. So do you.

293
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:57,083
What's the matter?

294
00:13:57,125 --> 00:14:00,250
I hate when guys talk dirty to me.

295
00:14:00,292 --> 00:14:01,875
No, I wasn't...

296
00:14:01,917 --> 00:14:03,708
That wasn't supposed to be dirty, you just...

297
00:14:03,750 --> 00:14:05,042
I was...

298
00:14:05,125 --> 00:14:07,792
I'll forgive you because you're cute.

299
00:14:07,875 --> 00:14:10,250
But remember, keep your hands to yourself.

300
00:14:12,375 --> 00:14:16,375
(slow music)

301
00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:38,042
Here, shuffle these.

302
00:14:40,625 --> 00:14:41,583
This is so-

303
00:14:41,625 --> 00:14:42,667
Shhh.

304
00:14:42,750 --> 00:14:44,292
You have to concentrate.

305
00:14:46,875 --> 00:14:48,875
And now cut them three times.

306
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,125
This one is you.

307
00:15:02,875 --> 00:15:04,667
Why this one?

308
00:15:04,750 --> 00:15:08,500
Um... a dark haired boy with spiritual depths.

309
00:15:09,625 --> 00:15:10,917
And that's me?

310
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,875
Yes, but you might not know it yet.

311
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,000
I don’t know, he looks kind of like a wuss.

312
00:15:27,917 --> 00:15:30,625
These represent your past.

313
00:15:30,667 --> 00:15:32,583
Oh, I see.

314
00:15:32,625 --> 00:15:36,167
A fair haired man...

315
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:38,875
strict and unyielding.

316
00:15:38,917 --> 00:15:40,917
My dad.

317
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,083
This one says that you've tried

318
00:15:43,125 --> 00:15:46,042
a whole bunch of things, and
none of them have really worked out.

319
00:15:47,250 --> 00:15:48,917
You are totally absorbed

320
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,708
in your own ego and can't see
the spiritual side of things. See?

321
00:15:52,750 --> 00:15:54,542
What did I tell you? Virgo.

322
00:15:54,625 --> 00:15:56,833
Come on, they're just cards.

323
00:15:56,875 --> 00:16:01,708
And you've been desperately lonely.

324
00:16:01,750 --> 00:16:04,417
All right, listen, I have a lot of friends.

325
00:16:04,500 --> 00:16:07,708
I am just telling you what the cards say.

326
00:16:07,750 --> 00:16:10,167
Lonely. Well, desperately lonely.

327
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,375
These show your present.

328
00:16:19,417 --> 00:16:21,333
Let me guess.

329
00:16:21,375 --> 00:16:23,167
More misery.

330
00:16:23,250 --> 00:16:24,792
Well...

331
00:16:24,875 --> 00:16:29,500
you're disenchanted with life and
you don't know which way to turn.

332
00:16:31,125 --> 00:16:32,833
You can't make a decision

333
00:16:32,875 --> 00:16:35,583
and the dreams that could show you

334
00:16:35,625 --> 00:16:38,917
the way are lurid and fragmentary.

335
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,625
Lurid and fragmentary?

336
00:16:43,375 --> 00:16:45,542
I guess this is starting to make a little bit of sense.

337
00:16:45,625 --> 00:16:47,333
Well, it should.

338
00:16:47,375 --> 00:16:50,375
You know, I'd say you seem pretty lost.

339
00:16:50,417 --> 00:16:51,750
Lost, huh?

340
00:16:51,792 --> 00:16:54,417
Yeah or broken down.

341
00:16:54,500 --> 00:16:55,583
Like a car.

342
00:16:55,625 --> 00:16:59,167
Exactly. Or like you're drowning-

343
00:16:59,250 --> 00:17:02,583
Alright, listen Madeleine, this has been
a lot of fun, but I got to get out of here.

344
00:17:02,625 --> 00:17:05,958
Well, don't you want to see
what they say about your future?

345
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:09,125
You know, I can imagine what you've dreamt up for me.

346
00:17:09,167 --> 00:17:11,709
Okay, um... Well, I'll set these aside for now

347
00:17:11,792 --> 00:17:14,667
now, and you can look at them some other time.

348
00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:16,834
I really don't think there's going to be another time.

349
00:17:18,375 --> 00:17:21,750
Hey, aren't you going to kiss me goodbye or anything?

350
00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:26,625
Well, I can... if you want.

351
00:17:35,250 --> 00:17:37,542
I thought you didn’t believe in sex on the first date?

352
00:17:37,625 --> 00:17:38,500
I don't.

353
00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:40,875
But I do believe in fate.

354
00:17:45,917 --> 00:17:47,292
(birds chirping)

355
00:17:48,042 --> 00:17:50,667
What are you thinking about?

356
00:17:50,750 --> 00:17:53,958
Just working out how all this happened.

357
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:56,792
Now, do you believe in fate?

358
00:17:56,875 --> 00:17:58,167
Yeah, sure.

359
00:17:59,417 --> 00:18:03,875
And fate’s name is Mike or Andy. Or both.

360
00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:17,167
Damn it, Jeanie!

361
00:18:17,250 --> 00:18:20,000
I wish you'd stop. You're making me tired.

362
00:18:20,042 --> 00:18:26,042
Six, seven... eight.

363
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:30,208
I need to get in shape.

364
00:18:30,250 --> 00:18:31,417
What for?

365
00:18:32,375 --> 00:18:35,250
Guys like girls who have flat stomachs.

366
00:18:35,292 --> 00:18:36,958
What happened to Roger?

367
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:39,208
Mattie, where have you been?

368
00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:41,375
Roger and I broke up two weeks ago.

369
00:18:42,250 --> 00:18:43,792
I’m sorry, what happened?

370
00:18:43,875 --> 00:18:46,042
He just wasn't right for me.

371
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,250
Loser.

372
00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:49,167
I mean, he was pretty good in bed.

373
00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:53,167
If straight banging is your idea of all there is, but...

374
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,500
that boy is dumb as a post.

375
00:18:55,542 --> 00:18:57,833
You sure you knew how to choose them, sweetie.

376
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:59,042
I thought he was cute.

377
00:18:59,125 --> 00:19:01,083
He is cute, I’ll give him that.

378
00:19:01,125 --> 00:19:02,458
They're all cute, Jeanie.

379
00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:05,167
But don't you ever talk to them
before you hook up with them?

380
00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:07,083
What are you trying to say, Carol?

381
00:19:07,125 --> 00:19:09,833
Well, in the last 12 months, there's been...

382
00:19:09,875 --> 00:19:16,375
Let's see Kevin, then Jason, then Manuel, then Roger...

383
00:19:16,417 --> 00:19:17,667
Did I leave anyone out?

384
00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:19,292
Marty!

385
00:19:19,375 --> 00:19:22,250
Oh my god... Marty.

386
00:19:22,292 --> 00:19:23,750
How did I forget Marty?

387
00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:25,750
Oh, I liked Marty.

388
00:19:25,792 --> 00:19:26,958
He's a Libra.

389
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,458
Mattie, get a grip.

390
00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:30,792
Libra or not, that boy was a total tool.

391
00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:33,459
Anyway, Jeanie, there weren’t enough brains

392
00:19:33,542 --> 00:19:36,000
among the lot of them to power a 40 watt bulb.

393
00:19:36,042 --> 00:19:36,917
I know.

394
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,250
You'd have better luck screwing it into a potato.

395
00:19:40,125 --> 00:19:41,750
Brains aren't everything.

396
00:19:41,917 --> 00:19:44,667
Neither are penises, for Christ's sake...

397
00:19:45,292 --> 00:19:46,792
Sure are fun to play with though!

398
00:19:47,625 --> 00:19:48,542
Slut!

399
00:19:48,625 --> 00:19:51,417
That's a nice thing to call your best friend.

400
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:53,208
Why can't you be more like Maddie and me?

401
00:19:53,250 --> 00:19:55,125
We get along very well without guys.

402
00:19:55,167 --> 00:19:56,125
Don't we, Maddie?

403
00:19:57,167 --> 00:19:58,167
Oh, come on!

404
00:19:58,250 --> 00:20:00,958
So you're telling me that if a
guy walked in here right now

405
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,125
and offered you his bod, you would turn him down?

406
00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:05,000
Probably.

407
00:20:05,042 --> 00:20:07,708
But in any case, I'd sure as hell talk to him first.

408
00:20:07,750 --> 00:20:10,792
Otherwise you end up afterwards
wondering how to get him out of here.

409
00:20:11,792 --> 00:20:12,792
What about you, Maddie?

410
00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:16,125
What is that smile all about?

411
00:20:17,500 --> 00:20:18,958
Whose knitting is this?

412
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,375
My roommate's.

413
00:20:20,417 --> 00:20:21,375
Where is she?

414
00:20:21,417 --> 00:20:22,750
At work, as usual.

415
00:20:22,792 --> 00:20:24,750
That girl works way too much.

416
00:20:24,792 --> 00:20:27,500
Now, come on, Maddie. What is that smile all about?

417
00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:29,708
Maddie!

418
00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:31,417
I met a boy.

419
00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:32,667
You didn't!

420
00:20:32,750 --> 00:20:33,875
Who?

421
00:20:33,917 --> 00:20:36,583
His name is Tom. He's a Virgo.

422
00:20:36,625 --> 00:20:41,125
He's quite smart, mega cute and really sweet.

423
00:20:42,042 --> 00:20:44,083
Way to go girl!

424
00:20:44,125 --> 00:20:46,375
So, where and how did you meet him?

425
00:20:46,417 --> 00:20:47,625
At the library.

426
00:20:47,917 --> 00:20:50,000
Because that's what the library is for.

427
00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:51,750
So what happened?

428
00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:53,458
Just...

429
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:55,250
you know, fate.

430
00:21:00,917 --> 00:21:02,125
So how was your Thanksgiving?

431
00:21:03,625 --> 00:21:04,625
Terrible.

432
00:21:04,667 --> 00:21:05,833
How come?

433
00:21:05,875 --> 00:21:07,083
She had that guy there.

434
00:21:07,125 --> 00:21:09,292
Damn, the one that's boning her. What's he like?

435
00:21:09,375 --> 00:21:10,583
Yeah, is he nice?

436
00:21:10,625 --> 00:21:13,167
No, he's not nice. He's a fucking asshole!

437
00:21:13,209 --> 00:21:14,709
I woke up in the middle of the night-

438
00:21:14,792 --> 00:21:16,084
You're not going to believe this.

439
00:21:16,167 --> 00:21:18,667
I could hear them doing it
from the other end of the house.

440
00:21:18,750 --> 00:21:19,833
Wow, no kidding!

441
00:21:19,875 --> 00:21:21,917
I had to get up and go for a drive.

442
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:24,042
Your mom's a screamer, eh? I knew it!

443
00:21:24,125 --> 00:21:26,208
Andy, I swear to god I’m gonna fucking kill you!

444
00:21:26,250 --> 00:21:29,500
Hey, you know, Colette started
having an affair with her stepson

445
00:21:29,542 --> 00:21:32,250
when she was 49, and he was only 16.

446
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:33,625
Colette who?

447
00:21:34,125 --> 00:21:35,375
The famous French writer.

448
00:21:35,625 --> 00:21:36,875
Well, listen, asshole:

449
00:21:36,917 --> 00:21:39,292
my mom isn’t French and she can't write for shit!

450
00:21:39,375 --> 00:21:41,292
Wait, so you'd rather she didn't have sex at all?

451
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:42,417
Well...

452
00:21:42,500 --> 00:21:45,375
Yeah! I mean, she's 42 years old, for Christ's sake.

453
00:21:45,417 --> 00:21:46,833
It's time to take up knitting.

454
00:21:46,875 --> 00:21:48,375
You gonna give it up when you’re 42?

455
00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:50,667
Shit, dude, it's different for guys.

456
00:21:50,750 --> 00:21:52,250
Oh yeah, right. I forgot.

457
00:21:53,167 --> 00:21:54,333
Hamlet.

458
00:21:54,375 --> 00:21:55,667
What?

459
00:21:55,750 --> 00:21:59,125
Hamlet told his mother that she was too old for sex.

460
00:21:59,375 --> 00:22:02,000
Jesus, Tom! You've been reading again, haven't you?

461
00:22:02,042 --> 00:22:03,875
Yeah, I’m always reading...

462
00:22:04,125 --> 00:22:05,292
Well, Hamlet was right.

463
00:22:05,375 --> 00:22:08,500
Or at least Mom could have found
some divorced guy her own age.

464
00:22:08,542 --> 00:22:10,708
Shit, don't worry about it, Mike. She'll get over him.

465
00:22:10,750 --> 00:22:11,625
I hope so, man.

466
00:22:11,667 --> 00:22:13,208
And when she does...

467
00:22:13,250 --> 00:22:14,417
tell her I’m available.

468
00:22:14,750 --> 00:22:15,959
I’m gonna fucking kill you.

469
00:22:18,750 --> 00:22:20,750
Hey, guys, I um...

470
00:22:20,792 --> 00:22:22,292
I just wanted to thank you.

471
00:22:22,375 --> 00:22:23,292
For what?

472
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:27,333
I mean, you bastards, you set me up so good.

473
00:22:27,375 --> 00:22:28,917
What the fuck you talking about?

474
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,375
I mean, you must have been
on the phone the second I left.

475
00:22:32,417 --> 00:22:33,542
On the phone to who?

476
00:22:33,625 --> 00:22:34,458
Madeline.

477
00:22:34,500 --> 00:22:35,375
Who?

478
00:22:35,417 --> 00:22:38,958
Stop acting dumb. It’s the girl
that you guys set me up with

479
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,875
that night and told her everything I said to you.

480
00:22:43,875 --> 00:22:44,625
I don't get it.

481
00:22:44,667 --> 00:22:47,209
I really thought I could trust
you guys with my problems.

482
00:22:47,292 --> 00:22:49,584
- Listen, dude... Wait a minute, let me get this straight-

483
00:22:49,667 --> 00:22:52,375
How would you like it if I went
and told the world about your mom?

484
00:22:52,417 --> 00:22:55,625
Whoa, hold on! Back the truck up. You met some girl?

485
00:22:55,917 --> 00:22:57,625
As if you didn’t know.

486
00:22:58,000 --> 00:22:58,833
Did you bone her?

487
00:22:58,875 --> 00:23:01,417
I'm sure she filled you in on all the details.

488
00:23:02,875 --> 00:23:04,833
You did bone her!

489
00:23:04,875 --> 00:23:06,375
Way to go, dude!

490
00:23:06,417 --> 00:23:07,833
Fuckin’ awesome, Tommy!

491
00:23:07,875 --> 00:23:08,917
Yeah, yeah, yeah-

492
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,167
Okay, so, Maddie, spill.

493
00:23:11,250 --> 00:23:12,500
Did you fuck him?

494
00:23:12,917 --> 00:23:13,750
Yes.

495
00:23:14,417 --> 00:23:17,958
Oh my gosh, you are such a trollop!

496
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:19,083
On the first date?

497
00:23:19,125 --> 00:23:23,375
Yes. I wasn't going to, but he kind of swept me off my feet.

498
00:23:23,417 --> 00:23:24,583
Oh please.

499
00:23:24,625 --> 00:23:26,667
He just wouldn't take no for an answer.

500
00:23:26,750 --> 00:23:28,125
So did he spend the night?

501
00:23:28,167 --> 00:23:28,792
Yes.

502
00:23:28,875 --> 00:23:30,208
And how many times did you do it?

503
00:23:30,250 --> 00:23:32,458
For Christ's sake, Jeanie, you don't need to know that!

504
00:23:32,500 --> 00:23:35,375
No, I want to know! I always tell you girls!

505
00:23:36,250 --> 00:23:36,875
Four.

506
00:23:36,917 --> 00:23:37,750
Four?

507
00:23:37,792 --> 00:23:39,875
The last one of mine who could knock off a four spot

508
00:23:39,917 --> 00:23:41,250
was Simon back in high school.

509
00:23:41,500 --> 00:23:42,667
Simon Pettigrew?

510
00:23:42,750 --> 00:23:43,500
Yeah.

511
00:23:43,542 --> 00:23:44,750
Jesus...

512
00:23:45,625 --> 00:23:47,083
That boy was so anemic looking

513
00:23:47,125 --> 00:23:49,292
I always thought tying his
own shoe would wear him out.

514
00:23:49,375 --> 00:23:51,167
No, he was a real sex machine.

515
00:23:51,500 --> 00:23:53,000
But a raging dork.

516
00:23:53,292 --> 00:23:55,833
But a raging dork, unfortunately.

517
00:23:55,875 --> 00:23:57,917
I hope this Tom isn't a dork, Maddie.

518
00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:59,417
No, he's not.

519
00:23:59,500 --> 00:24:00,583
So, how big is he?

520
00:24:00,625 --> 00:24:02,708
About six foot, I think.

521
00:24:02,750 --> 00:24:05,458
No, not his height, his dick.

522
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:07,167
How big is Mr. Chubby?

523
00:24:07,250 --> 00:24:08,250
Jeannie!

524
00:24:08,292 --> 00:24:10,292
Look, guys, I appreciate the help,

525
00:24:10,375 --> 00:24:13,250
I guess, but I would really rather find a girl on my own.

526
00:24:13,292 --> 00:24:15,000
So you think we set you up with this girl?

527
00:24:15,084 --> 00:24:16,000
I know you did.

528
00:24:16,042 --> 00:24:17,834
Do you know what the fuck he’s talking about?

529
00:24:18,167 --> 00:24:20,750
I mean, you had to. She knew everything about me.

530
00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:23,083
There was a Madeline in our PE class.

531
00:24:23,125 --> 00:24:25,292
Was she the one with the pigtails and like the huge-

532
00:24:25,334 --> 00:24:27,167
Would you guys stop fucking with me?

533
00:24:27,875 --> 00:24:29,792
Tom, we're not fucking with you.

534
00:24:29,875 --> 00:24:31,000
We wouldn't do that.

535
00:24:31,042 --> 00:24:33,000
Unless, of course, you want us to.

536
00:24:33,042 --> 00:24:34,042
You do have a cute butt.

537
00:24:34,125 --> 00:24:36,708
But I admit that you had me going for a little bit,

538
00:24:36,750 --> 00:24:42,000
but the second she started quoting me,
word for word, I caught on pretty quick.

539
00:24:42,042 --> 00:24:46,667
Listen, Tom, I swear me and Andy
have nothing to do with any Madeline.

540
00:24:46,750 --> 00:24:47,792
On a stack of bibles.

541
00:24:47,875 --> 00:24:48,542
That high.

542
00:24:48,625 --> 00:24:50,583
You guys are such con artists. I’ve got to go.

543
00:24:50,625 --> 00:24:52,167
Hey, Tommy boy, don't be mad at us.

544
00:24:52,250 --> 00:24:53,959
Yeah, no shit. We're your best friends, man.

545
00:24:54,042 --> 00:24:55,542
Fuck off.

546
00:24:55,625 --> 00:24:58,042
You know, you guys will be happy to know

547
00:24:58,125 --> 00:25:01,292
I switched my major from physiology to English.

548
00:25:01,375 --> 00:25:02,042
Way to go, dude!

549
00:25:02,125 --> 00:25:04,500
Good for you, man. Hey, the
first time’s always the hardest.

550
00:25:04,542 --> 00:25:07,250
Next time you see Madeline,
tell her the Oscar's in the mail.

551
00:25:10,167 --> 00:25:11,667
- What the hell was that? - The fuck?

552
00:25:11,750 --> 00:25:13,792
So, when are you seeing him again?

553
00:25:14,250 --> 00:25:15,250
I'm not sure.

554
00:25:15,750 --> 00:25:17,042
You didn't make another date?

555
00:25:17,125 --> 00:25:18,000
No.

556
00:25:18,042 --> 00:25:20,667
Dammit, girl. How did you describe him?

557
00:25:20,750 --> 00:25:27,417
Sweet, smart, funny, big dick, four times a night.

558
00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:29,333
Why is he not handcuffed to your bed right now?

559
00:25:29,375 --> 00:25:31,917
Don't worry, fate has him handcuffed.

560
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:33,042
Oh, good Christ...

561
00:25:33,250 --> 00:25:34,042
(soft music)

562
00:25:46,250 --> 00:25:47,792
Roger keeps texting me.

563
00:25:47,875 --> 00:25:50,292
Oh my god. Stalker.

564
00:25:50,375 --> 00:25:52,208
No, it's kind of sweet.

565
00:25:52,250 --> 00:25:53,458
He sends me dirty stuff.

566
00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:54,500
Jeanie!

567
00:25:54,542 --> 00:25:56,000
And he sent me a nude last night!

568
00:25:56,750 --> 00:25:58,625
You're not going to take him back, are you?

569
00:25:59,375 --> 00:26:00,000
Uh...

570
00:26:00,042 --> 00:26:01,125
Maybe for one night.

571
00:26:02,667 --> 00:26:03,375
Boo!

572
00:26:04,625 --> 00:26:06,667
I’d like to kill that bastard!

573
00:26:06,750 --> 00:26:08,458
He didn't hurt you, did he?

574
00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:10,500
No, I guess not.

575
00:26:10,542 --> 00:26:11,875
I wonder who he is.

576
00:26:14,875 --> 00:26:16,625
Maddie, what's wrong?

577
00:26:18,500 --> 00:26:20,417
I have to go in this building. Why?

578
00:26:21,292 --> 00:26:22,125
Why?

579
00:26:23,875 --> 00:26:25,042
I'm not sure.

580
00:26:25,125 --> 00:26:27,583
I just have to go in there.

581
00:26:27,625 --> 00:26:28,750
Want us to come with you?

582
00:26:29,417 --> 00:26:30,667
No, that’s all right.

583
00:26:58,125 --> 00:26:59,042
Hey!

584
00:27:00,750 --> 00:27:01,917
How’d you find me?

585
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,750
The Virgo vibes?

586
00:27:03,792 --> 00:27:05,625
Just that... how?

587
00:27:05,667 --> 00:27:06,500
The Virgo vibes.

588
00:27:06,542 --> 00:27:09,000
I just followed them. They led me straight to you.

589
00:27:10,042 --> 00:27:11,417
That is crazy.

590
00:27:12,375 --> 00:27:13,292
What are you doing?

591
00:27:13,375 --> 00:27:14,542
I'm hiding from you.

592
00:27:15,250 --> 00:27:16,875
Really? Why?

593
00:27:17,667 --> 00:27:19,208
I guess not really.

594
00:27:19,250 --> 00:27:20,917
I was kind of hiding from myself.

595
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,167
Oh, well, that's what Virgos do best.

596
00:27:23,250 --> 00:27:24,542
I suppose so.

597
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,875
It's great to see you again.

598
00:27:27,917 --> 00:27:30,042
Do you want to go do something?

599
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:32,250
Okay, sure.

600
00:27:34,375 --> 00:27:36,292
I have to warn you, though,

601
00:27:36,375 --> 00:27:38,625
I do believe in sex on the second date.

602
00:27:39,625 --> 00:27:42,750
You know, that is such an awesome
coincidence, because so do I.

603
00:27:42,792 --> 00:27:44,042
Oh, good.

604
00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:03,125
I like your tattoo.

605
00:28:03,167 --> 00:28:04,667
You should get one.

606
00:28:05,625 --> 00:28:07,083
Yeah, maybe I will.

607
00:28:07,125 --> 00:28:09,167
We should get your ears pierced.

608
00:28:09,250 --> 00:28:11,833
Okay, my dad will throw a fit.

609
00:28:11,875 --> 00:28:13,667
Oh, Mr. Stern and unyielding?

610
00:28:13,750 --> 00:28:15,417
The very same.

611
00:28:15,500 --> 00:28:17,458
He is so pissed at me for changing my major.

612
00:28:17,500 --> 00:28:20,125
Well, if he's already mad, then why not go all the way?

613
00:28:22,750 --> 00:28:26,208
Now, that sounds like a good idea.

614
00:28:26,250 --> 00:28:27,208
What?

615
00:28:27,250 --> 00:28:28,292
Going all the way.

616
00:28:28,375 --> 00:28:29,167
Again?

617
00:28:29,250 --> 00:28:30,333
Mmm-hmm.

618
00:28:30,375 --> 00:28:32,833
That one would look great on you.

619
00:28:32,875 --> 00:28:34,625
Oh jeez, Madeline, I don’t know.

620
00:28:34,667 --> 00:28:36,417
No, I’m gonna go see how much it costs.

621
00:28:49,042 --> 00:28:50,042
Oh, hey, Tom!

622
00:28:50,125 --> 00:28:52,875
Oh, hey, Shaun. Hey.

623
00:28:52,917 --> 00:28:53,833
Now how’s it going?

624
00:28:53,875 --> 00:28:54,875
It's going pretty good-

625
00:28:54,917 --> 00:28:55,667
Shaun?

626
00:28:56,500 --> 00:28:57,375
Maddie?

627
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:01,458
Damn. Where have you been?

628
00:29:01,500 --> 00:29:03,875
I know. I've missed you so much.

629
00:29:03,917 --> 00:29:05,250
Have you met Tom?

630
00:29:05,292 --> 00:29:07,417
Yeah, Tom and I have known each other for a while now.

631
00:29:07,500 --> 00:29:08,125
Yeah...

632
00:29:09,375 --> 00:29:10,833
Well, I’ve got to run. Call me.

633
00:29:10,875 --> 00:29:12,625
I will, I promise.

634
00:29:15,375 --> 00:29:16,208
Hey, Maddie,

635
00:29:16,250 --> 00:29:19,125
I think the horoscope you cast
for me is just about to come true.

636
00:29:19,167 --> 00:29:20,750
Oh, well, have I ever been wrong?

637
00:29:23,875 --> 00:29:25,167
How long have you known Sean for?

638
00:29:25,250 --> 00:29:26,167
$85.

639
00:29:26,250 --> 00:29:27,083
What?

640
00:29:27,125 --> 00:29:29,375
That’s how much the tattoo costs.

641
00:29:30,750 --> 00:29:33,583
Oh, uh... that's a lot.

642
00:29:33,625 --> 00:29:35,167
Since my freshman year.

643
00:29:35,250 --> 00:29:36,708
What?

644
00:29:36,750 --> 00:29:39,375
I've known Sean since my freshman year.

645
00:29:39,417 --> 00:29:40,708
Oh, um...

646
00:29:40,750 --> 00:29:42,875
Well, you know, he's actually Mike's roommate.

647
00:29:42,917 --> 00:29:43,875
Is he?

648
00:29:43,917 --> 00:29:44,584
Yeah.

649
00:29:50,375 --> 00:29:51,167
So Madeline...

650
00:29:55,250 --> 00:29:57,667
How long have you known Mike and Andy for, anyway?

651
00:29:57,750 --> 00:29:58,750
Who?

652
00:29:59,750 --> 00:30:00,750
You know.

653
00:30:02,417 --> 00:30:04,917
Mike and Andy...

654
00:30:06,750 --> 00:30:08,042
What are their star signs?

655
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:10,417
What's that got to do with anything?

656
00:30:10,750 --> 00:30:12,000
I want to know.

657
00:30:13,042 --> 00:30:14,500
Okay, um...

658
00:30:15,750 --> 00:30:16,750
Mike's like...

659
00:30:17,750 --> 00:30:20,917
May 25th, I think, or 26th,

660
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:24,750
and then Andy was sometime in late July.

661
00:30:25,875 --> 00:30:27,667
Gemini and Leo.

662
00:30:27,750 --> 00:30:28,917
That's perfect.

663
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:30,292
Perfect for what?

664
00:30:30,375 --> 00:30:33,042
They're the best friends a Virgo can have.

665
00:30:35,292 --> 00:30:37,250
Yeah, they are good friends.

666
00:30:38,292 --> 00:30:39,500
My best friends.

667
00:30:40,500 --> 00:30:42,125
You're lucky to have them.

668
00:30:43,125 --> 00:30:44,917
I'm still pissed at them, though.

669
00:30:46,125 --> 00:30:47,583
Be good to them.

670
00:30:47,625 --> 00:30:50,292
They're just pawns of fate like you and me.

671
00:30:52,250 --> 00:30:54,125
Yeah, whatever.

672
00:30:58,000 --> 00:30:59,292
I don't know, bro.

673
00:30:59,375 --> 00:31:01,417
Maybe I should leave the Christmas lights up.

674
00:31:01,500 --> 00:31:03,042
I sort of dig them. What do you think?

675
00:31:03,750 --> 00:31:06,208
Yeah, they are pretty cool.

676
00:31:06,250 --> 00:31:08,083
Tell you what, man, I'm all about Christmas.

677
00:31:08,125 --> 00:31:10,125
Yeah. Did you get anything good this year?

678
00:31:10,500 --> 00:31:12,917
Fuck yeah. My old man was so shit-face pleased that

679
00:31:12,959 --> 00:31:15,375
I passed math that he gave me a thousand bucks.

680
00:31:15,667 --> 00:31:16,334
Cool.

681
00:31:16,917 --> 00:31:19,125
I guess that means you're
buying the beer this semester.

682
00:31:19,167 --> 00:31:20,542
In your dreams, fuckface.

683
00:31:21,959 --> 00:31:23,375
I had a pretty good Christmas, too.

684
00:31:23,459 --> 00:31:24,334
Thanks for asking.

685
00:31:24,417 --> 00:31:25,250
Yeah?

686
00:31:25,292 --> 00:31:27,542
Yeah. Me and Daryl spent some time together.

687
00:31:28,125 --> 00:31:28,917
Daryl?

688
00:31:29,417 --> 00:31:30,125
Yeah. You know...

689
00:31:31,167 --> 00:31:32,167
My mom’s boyfriend.

690
00:31:32,375 --> 00:31:33,500
You hung out with him?

691
00:31:33,667 --> 00:31:36,000
Yeah. He's actually pretty cool.

692
00:31:36,625 --> 00:31:38,125
Ain’t he still bonin’ the moms?

693
00:31:38,292 --> 00:31:39,042
Yeah, but...

694
00:31:40,042 --> 00:31:41,917
I kind of feel sorry for the guy now.

695
00:31:42,209 --> 00:31:43,625
Jeez, dude, what's gotten into you?

696
00:31:43,667 --> 00:31:47,500
Before Christmas you were ready to cut off
his balls and feed them to your goldfish.

697
00:31:47,792 --> 00:31:49,708
Yeah, but you know what?

698
00:31:49,750 --> 00:31:51,167
I think he really loves my mom.

699
00:31:51,250 --> 00:31:52,500
She is a cougar.

700
00:31:53,625 --> 00:31:57,208
Hell, I even think he wants to marry her, but she won't.

701
00:31:57,250 --> 00:31:58,292
Why not?

702
00:31:58,375 --> 00:32:00,000
She says she's too old for him.

703
00:32:00,250 --> 00:32:04,458
Oh, well, you know, Colette, the famous
French writer, she started doing the nasty

704
00:32:04,500 --> 00:32:08,125
with her grandson when she was 102 and he was only 13.

705
00:32:08,292 --> 00:32:10,250
I mean, if they love each other...

706
00:32:11,417 --> 00:32:12,375
What's the difference?

707
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:14,792
Dam, dude, what's gotten into you?

708
00:32:19,125 --> 00:32:20,125
Good wine.

709
00:32:20,167 --> 00:32:21,833
Yeah. It's not bad, is it?

710
00:32:21,875 --> 00:32:22,500
More, please.

711
00:32:24,875 --> 00:32:26,792
I thought Sheila. was supposed to be here.

712
00:32:26,875 --> 00:32:29,625
She was supposed to, but she got
called in to work at the last minute.

713
00:32:29,709 --> 00:32:31,625
I haven't seen her in ages.

714
00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:34,500
So, what did Tom get you for Christmas?

715
00:32:35,250 --> 00:32:36,125
This.

716
00:32:36,625 --> 00:32:39,417
Ooh, very nice. Is that amber?

717
00:32:39,500 --> 00:32:40,542
Yup.

718
00:32:40,625 --> 00:32:42,667
Sweet. What did you get him?

719
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:46,625
I paid to have his ears pierced
and bought him earrings.

720
00:32:46,750 --> 00:32:49,250
Damn. You are making that boy over.

721
00:32:49,500 --> 00:32:50,542
Well, I'm trying.

722
00:32:50,792 --> 00:32:51,392
(ringing doorbell)

723
00:32:51,625 --> 00:32:52,792
That must be Jeanie.

724
00:32:58,125 --> 00:33:00,333
Damn, it is cold out!

725
00:33:00,375 --> 00:33:01,458
Well, come on in.

726
00:33:01,500 --> 00:33:02,833
Come on, Roger, sweetie.

727
00:33:02,875 --> 00:33:05,083
Oh, I'm supposed to be meeting my sister.

728
00:33:05,125 --> 00:33:06,917
You can have one glass of wine, can't you?

729
00:33:08,292 --> 00:33:10,375
Yeah, well okay, but only one.

730
00:33:10,459 --> 00:33:12,792
Sometimes he smells my
breath to see if I've been drinking.

731
00:33:14,667 --> 00:33:16,375
Oh, hi Jeanie. How was your Christmas?

732
00:33:17,042 --> 00:33:19,083
Oh. Hi Roger.

733
00:33:19,125 --> 00:33:20,042
How you doing?

734
00:33:20,667 --> 00:33:23,167
My Christmas was great.

735
00:33:23,250 --> 00:33:26,167
Um... Roger and I just sort of holed up here.

736
00:33:26,250 --> 00:33:26,917
Yeah,

737
00:33:27,750 --> 00:33:29,917
This wine was pretty cheap, but it's not bad.

738
00:33:30,167 --> 00:33:32,333
Me and Jeanie had some good wine last night.

739
00:33:32,375 --> 00:33:33,750
It was Romarian.

740
00:33:35,125 --> 00:33:36,750
Romanian, sweetie.

741
00:33:37,542 --> 00:33:41,167
Yeah, uh, well, I knew it was
one of those African countries.

742
00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:43,333
Yeah.

743
00:33:43,375 --> 00:33:47,500
Yeah, one of those African
countries like Bulgaria and Albania.

744
00:33:47,542 --> 00:33:48,625
Yeah.

745
00:33:49,667 --> 00:33:52,917
Anyways, here's to four timers.

746
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,792
Jeanie, you slut.

747
00:33:56,292 --> 00:33:57,875
I don’t get it. What's so funny?

748
00:33:58,625 --> 00:33:59,917
Oh, just girl stuff, sweetie.

749
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:02,500
Hey, why don't you drink your
drink and then go see your sister?

750
00:34:03,125 --> 00:34:04,042
Okay.

751
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:13,292
See you later, sweetie.

752
00:34:14,042 --> 00:34:15,750
Still don’t get what’s so funny.

753
00:34:15,792 --> 00:34:17,750
Bye Roger.

754
00:34:17,792 --> 00:34:19,750
Nice to see you, Roger.

755
00:34:20,792 --> 00:34:23,125
That boy is still dumb as a post.

756
00:34:23,375 --> 00:34:25,000
True,

757
00:34:25,042 --> 00:34:26,792
but you should see him with his clothes off.

758
00:34:26,875 --> 00:34:27,792
Yuck!

759
00:34:27,875 --> 00:34:29,542
I thought you broke up with him.

760
00:34:29,625 --> 00:34:30,667
I took him back.

761
00:34:30,750 --> 00:34:32,459
I told him that if he could do it four times

762
00:34:32,542 --> 00:34:34,000
a night like Tom, then he could stay.

763
00:34:34,042 --> 00:34:34,708
You didn’t!

764
00:34:34,750 --> 00:34:36,417
It worked like a charm.

765
00:34:36,500 --> 00:34:39,000
I got that male ego thing going.

766
00:34:39,042 --> 00:34:40,208
I don't know, Jeanie.

767
00:34:40,250 --> 00:34:41,875
He looks pretty exhausted to me.

768
00:34:43,250 --> 00:34:45,792
Yeah, poor guy.

769
00:34:45,875 --> 00:34:47,542
Maybe I should give him a night off?

770
00:34:48,417 --> 00:34:49,292
Not!

771
00:34:49,625 --> 00:34:52,375
I just want to know what the
hell you guys talk about in between.

772
00:34:52,625 --> 00:34:54,750
Oh. Um...

773
00:34:54,792 --> 00:34:56,375
How good it was...

774
00:34:56,417 --> 00:34:58,000
When we’re gonna do it again...

775
00:35:00,667 --> 00:35:02,250
Fascinating.

776
00:35:02,292 --> 00:35:04,708
So, Maddie, how are things going with Tom?

777
00:35:04,750 --> 00:35:06,208
Wonderfully.

778
00:35:06,250 --> 00:35:07,917
Look what he gave her for Christmas.

779
00:35:09,125 --> 00:35:10,167
Oh, sweet!

780
00:35:10,250 --> 00:35:11,250
What did you get for him?

781
00:35:11,500 --> 00:35:12,333
Earrings.

782
00:35:12,375 --> 00:35:13,125
No kidding.

783
00:35:13,167 --> 00:35:14,958
He looks really cute in them.

784
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:16,292
So how is he holding up?

785
00:35:16,917 --> 00:35:17,542
What?

786
00:35:17,750 --> 00:35:19,125
Still doing it four times a night?

787
00:35:20,250 --> 00:35:21,625
Sometimes less...

788
00:35:22,417 --> 00:35:23,958
but usually more.

789
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:25,000
More?

790
00:35:25,375 --> 00:35:26,292
Good lord...

791
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:28,125
Poor Roger.

792
00:35:28,250 --> 00:35:29,625
So, what's he up to today?

793
00:35:29,792 --> 00:35:31,875
He went to make up with Mike and Andy.

794
00:35:32,125 --> 00:35:35,583
How anybody could be friends
with that Andy is beyond me.

795
00:35:35,625 --> 00:35:37,667
You see any of the old gang when you were back home?

796
00:35:37,792 --> 00:35:40,250
Mary-Ann. You know she got married to The Fenster?

797
00:35:40,292 --> 00:35:41,542
Yeah. Rebound.

798
00:35:41,625 --> 00:35:44,958
She's pregnant and looks like a giant bowling ball.

799
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:46,125
Oh, fuck.

800
00:35:46,167 --> 00:35:47,833
Hey, and I went to see your grandma.

801
00:35:47,875 --> 00:35:49,917
Yeah, she told me. That was nice of you, Andy.

802
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:51,750
Hey, I dig your grandma, man.

803
00:35:51,792 --> 00:35:55,292
Besides, she makes the best
Christmas cookies in all of West Branch.

804
00:35:55,375 --> 00:35:58,292
Yeah, she brought a bunch down
when she came over to my mom's place.

805
00:35:58,500 --> 00:35:59,875
What does she think about Darrell?

806
00:35:59,959 --> 00:36:01,250
She's pretty cool about it.

807
00:36:03,375 --> 00:36:04,459
Who the fuck could that be?

808
00:36:04,917 --> 00:36:05,792
Come on in!

809
00:36:06,667 --> 00:36:07,708
Hey, guys!

810
00:36:07,750 --> 00:36:09,125
- Tommy! - Woah, what up, dude?

811
00:36:09,167 --> 00:36:10,208
Here I am.

812
00:36:10,250 --> 00:36:11,292
Where the hell you been?

813
00:36:11,375 --> 00:36:12,208
Still mad at us?

814
00:36:12,250 --> 00:36:15,292
No. I actually came by to
apologize for being such a dick...

815
00:36:15,625 --> 00:36:17,708
And I got a present!

816
00:36:17,750 --> 00:36:20,250
Whoa, look at this!

817
00:36:21,125 --> 00:36:22,875
Now, this is the good stuff!

818
00:36:22,917 --> 00:36:25,208
Way too good for the likes of you.

819
00:36:25,250 --> 00:36:27,583
Says the guy who drinks rubbing alcohol.

820
00:36:27,625 --> 00:36:29,458
Hey, I mix it with tomato juice.

821
00:36:29,500 --> 00:36:30,875
I remember.

822
00:36:30,917 --> 00:36:32,375
So, Tom, what's with the present?

823
00:36:32,750 --> 00:36:37,083
I wanted to apologize and to
thank you for being my best friends.

824
00:36:37,125 --> 00:36:37,875
Aw...

825
00:36:37,917 --> 00:36:39,500
Damn, dude, we don't even like you.

826
00:36:39,542 --> 00:36:42,667
Don't tell the that now
dickhead, he might take this back.

827
00:36:42,750 --> 00:36:46,250
No, I mean it. You guys, you’ve really helped me. Just-

828
00:36:46,292 --> 00:36:48,417
Whoa, hold on! Are those earrings I see?

829
00:36:48,500 --> 00:36:49,417
Oh yeah.

830
00:36:49,500 --> 00:36:50,125
Let me see.

831
00:36:50,209 --> 00:36:51,708
What, you decide you’re gay, or what?

832
00:36:51,750 --> 00:36:52,542
Shut up, Andy.

833
00:36:52,625 --> 00:36:55,250
No, Madeleine, she... she thought that, um...

834
00:36:55,292 --> 00:36:57,042
Madeleine? You’re still with her?

835
00:36:57,125 --> 00:36:58,208
Sure am. Yeah.

836
00:36:58,250 --> 00:37:01,167
She thought I'd look good in earrings,
so she got me these for Christmas.

837
00:37:01,209 --> 00:37:03,958
Hold on a minute, this the same
chick you thought we set you up with?

838
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:05,542
Yeah, but, I mean, it's cool now.

839
00:37:05,625 --> 00:37:07,167
She is wonderful.

840
00:37:07,250 --> 00:37:08,625
What do your folks think about her?

841
00:37:08,709 --> 00:37:09,792
Oh, my dad went postal!

842
00:37:09,875 --> 00:37:11,083
He kicked me out of the house.

843
00:37:11,125 --> 00:37:11,792
No kidding.

844
00:37:11,834 --> 00:37:13,625
Yeah, and I didn't even show him the tattoos.

845
00:37:13,709 --> 00:37:14,500
Wait, tattoos?

846
00:37:14,542 --> 00:37:16,000
You got tattoos? Let me see.

847
00:37:16,042 --> 00:37:17,708
No, no, they’re just tattoos.

848
00:37:17,750 --> 00:37:19,167
Show and tell time!

849
00:37:19,250 --> 00:37:20,417
Yeah, okay, okay!

850
00:37:21,750 --> 00:37:23,583
Whoa. Those are way cool.

851
00:37:23,625 --> 00:37:24,875
Jesus. Didn't it hurt?

852
00:37:24,917 --> 00:37:26,458
Oh, like a son of a bitch.

853
00:37:26,500 --> 00:37:27,334
So why'd you do it?

854
00:37:27,750 --> 00:37:28,667
I don’t know.

855
00:37:29,500 --> 00:37:31,375
Well, Madeline had some, and, like...

856
00:37:32,500 --> 00:37:33,917
I just wanted to make a statement.

857
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:35,375
Pretty radical statement.

858
00:37:35,417 --> 00:37:37,375
I never figured you for a tattoo guy, Tommy.

859
00:37:37,417 --> 00:37:39,375
I have changed, Andy.

860
00:37:39,417 --> 00:37:40,333
You got any more?

861
00:37:40,375 --> 00:37:42,042
Yeah, but I’m not showing you.

862
00:37:42,125 --> 00:37:45,125
Woah, you got the Statue of Liberty
tattooed on your dick or something?

863
00:37:45,167 --> 00:37:46,125
Or something.

864
00:37:46,167 --> 00:37:48,042
I guess you're pretty hooked on this, Madeline.

865
00:37:48,125 --> 00:37:48,725
Yeah.

866
00:37:48,792 --> 00:37:51,667
Ain't no chick on this planet
going to get me to tattoo my dick.

867
00:37:51,750 --> 00:37:52,500
No fucking way.

868
00:37:52,542 --> 00:37:53,833
It's not on my penis, dude.

869
00:37:53,875 --> 00:37:54,792
Thank god!

870
00:37:54,875 --> 00:37:56,458
That would hurt way too much.

871
00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:59,250
And plus, I imagine you've been
using that thing a lot recently.

872
00:38:00,250 --> 00:38:01,875
Jesus, Tom, you have changed.

873
00:38:01,917 --> 00:38:04,125
I have never been this happy.

874
00:38:04,167 --> 00:38:05,167
That's great, Tom.

875
00:38:05,250 --> 00:38:07,708
I never realized how lonely I was.

876
00:38:07,750 --> 00:38:09,667
What do you mean, lonely? You've always had us.

877
00:38:09,750 --> 00:38:11,500
Well, yeah, but... like...

878
00:38:11,875 --> 00:38:13,292
No, I get what you're saying, Tom.

879
00:38:14,417 --> 00:38:18,250
Having friends is great, but you need
someone you can share everything with.

880
00:38:18,542 --> 00:38:19,583
You mean sex.

881
00:38:19,625 --> 00:38:22,000
I mean love, Andy. Love.

882
00:38:22,042 --> 00:38:25,167
And how would you know, asshole?
You’ve never loved anyone except yourself.

883
00:38:25,250 --> 00:38:26,792
I just know, that's all.

884
00:38:26,875 --> 00:38:29,208
I just know, that's all. Dickhead.

885
00:38:29,250 --> 00:38:31,208
Hey, why don't we put a dent in that bottle?

886
00:38:31,250 --> 00:38:32,667
Good idea. I'll get some glasses.

887
00:38:32,750 --> 00:38:35,208
This stuff is too good to drink out of the bottle.

888
00:38:35,250 --> 00:38:36,583
Amen to that, buddy.

889
00:38:36,625 --> 00:38:39,667
Uh, so, Mikey, did you give Sean a little Christmas bone?

890
00:38:39,750 --> 00:38:42,083
And I do mean little.

891
00:38:42,125 --> 00:38:43,333
Sheila Montrose!

892
00:38:43,375 --> 00:38:44,625
Ouch!

893
00:38:48,500 --> 00:38:49,375
Carol..

894
00:38:51,167 --> 00:38:58,542
You know that I am your oldest
and dearest and drunkest friend.

895
00:38:58,625 --> 00:38:59,625
Uh-oh.

896
00:38:59,667 --> 00:39:02,667
Wait... Jeanie, you're not that old.

897
00:39:02,750 --> 00:39:03,750
Maybe she is.

898
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:07,583
Well, I just have to say this-

899
00:39:07,625 --> 00:39:10,417
I already know what you’re
going to say, so just save it.

900
00:39:11,500 --> 00:39:16,167
How could you know what I'm going
to say if I only just thought of it myself?

901
00:39:16,250 --> 00:39:19,750
You're going to ask me for the
95th time why I'm not dating.

902
00:39:20,625 --> 00:39:25,375
I mean, it's been like a year and
a half since you broke up with Billy.

903
00:39:25,417 --> 00:39:29,083
I mean, shit, sweetie, it's time to stop grieving.

904
00:39:29,125 --> 00:39:32,500
I'm not grieving, I’ve just gone off guys is all.

905
00:39:33,125 --> 00:39:38,333
Carol, why can’t you just remember
the wonderful times you had with Billy?

906
00:39:38,375 --> 00:39:40,708
Yeah, forget all the bad stuff.

907
00:39:40,750 --> 00:39:44,583
Damn, you two have a funny idea of how memory works.

908
00:39:44,625 --> 00:39:45,625
What do you mean?

909
00:39:46,292 --> 00:39:48,875
It's like whenever I try to think about the good times,

910
00:39:48,917 --> 00:39:51,375
the bad times just keep filtering in.

911
00:39:52,542 --> 00:39:53,917
That's sad.

912
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:56,417
It's like going to a movie for the second time.

913
00:39:56,500 --> 00:39:58,125
How can you forget how it ends?

914
00:39:58,750 --> 00:40:00,875
I never remember.

915
00:40:00,917 --> 00:40:06,000
Wait, so does this mean that
you're, like, off of guys forever?

916
00:40:06,542 --> 00:40:09,625
No. I mean, I just need to find the right guy.

917
00:40:10,667 --> 00:40:12,542
What is the right guy?

918
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:19,000
From childhood hours, I've not been, as others were.

919
00:40:19,042 --> 00:40:22,000
I've not seen as others saw.

920
00:40:24,417 --> 00:40:25,875
What the hell is that?

921
00:40:26,625 --> 00:40:27,792
Edgar Allan Poe!

922
00:40:27,875 --> 00:40:29,500
What's that got to do with anything?

923
00:40:29,542 --> 00:40:31,875
Look, I just seen a guy who's weird, like me,

924
00:40:31,917 --> 00:40:33,500
Like Billy.

925
00:40:33,542 --> 00:40:36,250
Like Billy before he got so heavy into drugs.

926
00:40:36,292 --> 00:40:39,000
So, like, a nice weird.

927
00:40:39,542 --> 00:40:40,292
Yeah,

928
00:40:41,250 --> 00:40:42,917
Like Sheila!

929
00:40:43,292 --> 00:40:44,542
Right?

930
00:40:44,875 --> 00:40:47,750
If Sheila was a man I'd marry her in a minute.

931
00:40:47,792 --> 00:40:48,875
Marry her anyway!

932
00:40:49,625 --> 00:40:50,792
It would never work.

933
00:40:51,500 --> 00:40:54,250
Come on, Carol, don't be so old fashioned.

934
00:40:54,292 --> 00:40:55,375
She's vegan.

935
00:40:58,250 --> 00:41:02,250
(background traffic)

936
00:41:05,417 --> 00:41:06,875
I love you, Madeleine.

937
00:41:08,042 --> 00:41:09,125
You do?

938
00:41:09,750 --> 00:41:10,792
You know I do.

939
00:41:13,750 --> 00:41:15,667
That’s sweet, Tom.

940
00:41:25,375 --> 00:41:26,625
So where the fuck are they?

941
00:41:27,750 --> 00:41:28,625
They'll be here.

942
00:41:29,500 --> 00:41:32,458
Dude, what the fuck am I doing here?
I don’t even want to meet this chick.

943
00:41:32,500 --> 00:41:35,750
Yes you do, Andy. It’s Tom’s girl, for god’s sake.

944
00:41:35,792 --> 00:41:38,750
Well, they better be here in 5 minutes
or I'm going to go ahead and order.

945
00:41:40,250 --> 00:41:40,917
Here they are.

946
00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:45,500
Hey, guys, this is Madeleine.

947
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:48,750
Madeleine, this is Mike.

948
00:41:48,792 --> 00:41:49,625
Hi, Madeleine.

949
00:41:49,667 --> 00:41:50,583
Hi.

950
00:41:50,625 --> 00:41:53,167
And, of course, the famous Andy Detweiler.

951
00:41:53,250 --> 00:41:54,417
Hey, Andy.

952
00:41:54,750 --> 00:41:55,375
Hey.

953
00:41:55,417 --> 00:42:01,500
Okay, so you're the Gemini, and
you're a Leo. That’s clear to see.

954
00:42:02,542 --> 00:42:04,625
It's really great to meet you.

955
00:42:04,667 --> 00:42:06,625
Tom' been talking a lot about you.

956
00:42:07,375 --> 00:42:08,167
Has he?

957
00:42:09,292 --> 00:42:11,375
What else is there to talk about?

958
00:42:13,375 --> 00:42:14,667
I like your friends.

959
00:42:15,667 --> 00:42:17,250
Yeah, they're good guys.

960
00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:20,375
Andy was pretty quiet.

961
00:42:21,500 --> 00:42:22,875
Yeah, I know.

962
00:42:22,917 --> 00:42:24,250
He was nice, though,

963
00:42:25,792 --> 00:42:28,375
Hey, want to know something?

964
00:42:28,417 --> 00:42:29,708
What?

965
00:42:29,750 --> 00:42:31,500
I still love you.

966
00:42:32,417 --> 00:42:34,417
Well, I should hope so.

967
00:42:36,375 --> 00:42:38,375
Do you still have those cards?

968
00:42:38,417 --> 00:42:39,708
Which cards?

969
00:42:39,750 --> 00:42:42,667
You know, the um... the tarot.

970
00:42:42,750 --> 00:42:44,625
My future.

971
00:42:44,667 --> 00:42:46,000
Those cards.

972
00:42:46,625 --> 00:42:48,292
Yeah, I want to see them.

973
00:42:48,375 --> 00:42:49,125
Now?

974
00:42:50,125 --> 00:42:51,958
Sure. Why not now?

975
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,125
Well, isn't there something you'd rather do?

976
00:42:57,375 --> 00:42:58,875
Well, maybe...

977
00:43:03,917 --> 00:43:05,500
What you thinking about?

978
00:43:06,292 --> 00:43:08,625
Just how happy I am.

979
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:12,375
Do you think I've changed?

980
00:43:14,125 --> 00:43:16,875
You have a tattoo on your butt.

981
00:43:17,292 --> 00:43:19,833
Come on. You know what I mean.

982
00:43:19,875 --> 00:43:21,792
Do I still look lost?

983
00:43:21,875 --> 00:43:22,500
No.

984
00:43:22,542 --> 00:43:24,083
Or, uh...

985
00:43:24,125 --> 00:43:30,375
broke down or drowning or desperately lonely?

986
00:43:30,417 --> 00:43:32,292
Stop it, Tom, that tickles.

987
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:34,250
I want to see my tarot.

988
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:36,750
I don't know where they are.

989
00:43:42,750 --> 00:43:43,750
Ooh, dusty.

990
00:43:51,875 --> 00:43:54,625
What is the point? I mean,
the future's already happened.

991
00:43:55,542 --> 00:43:58,125
Well, I want to know what they
thought my future was going to be.

992
00:43:59,542 --> 00:44:00,875
I don’t want to.

993
00:44:01,250 --> 00:44:02,750
Please?

994
00:44:04,625 --> 00:44:05,417
Alright.

995
00:44:05,500 --> 00:44:06,125
Yes!

996
00:44:07,667 --> 00:44:10,417
Uh, this is you stepping off into the unknown.

997
00:44:11,917 --> 00:44:13,750
A complete change in your life.

998
00:44:14,542 --> 00:44:16,250
Right on.

999
00:44:19,750 --> 00:44:20,667
Oh, uh-oh.

1000
00:44:20,917 --> 00:44:24,250
Nothing to worry about. It just
means that the old you is dead.

1001
00:44:25,250 --> 00:44:27,000
See, I have changed.

1002
00:44:31,375 --> 00:44:32,000
What?

1003
00:44:32,875 --> 00:44:35,792
A fair haired girl with spiritual depths.

1004
00:44:36,250 --> 00:44:36,875
But...

1005
00:44:37,542 --> 00:44:39,125
But what?

1006
00:44:40,917 --> 00:44:42,042
Nothing.

1007
00:44:50,917 --> 00:44:53,625
Boy, those cards were right.

1008
00:45:03,625 --> 00:45:04,667
So what changed her mind?

1009
00:45:05,250 --> 00:45:07,000
Well, I told her I was all for it.

1010
00:45:07,250 --> 00:45:11,125
And my grandma said my mom deserved
Daryl after spending 15 years with my dad.

1011
00:45:11,417 --> 00:45:12,500
Your grandma’s great, man.

1012
00:45:12,542 --> 00:45:13,375
Yeah, and guess what?

1013
00:45:13,459 --> 00:45:14,059
What?

1014
00:45:14,125 --> 00:45:15,000
I get to be best man.

1015
00:45:15,084 --> 00:45:15,917
No kidding?

1016
00:45:15,959 --> 00:45:17,625
Yeah, I'm so fucking excited.

1017
00:45:19,125 --> 00:45:21,292
Andy, there's that masked guy again.

1018
00:45:21,625 --> 00:45:23,000
Who the fuck is he?

1019
00:45:23,500 --> 00:45:24,417
He's everywhere.

1020
00:45:27,125 --> 00:45:28,375
Where the hell is Tom?

1021
00:45:28,500 --> 00:45:31,375
I remember the days when he was
always at least 10 minutes early?

1022
00:45:31,667 --> 00:45:33,375
Yeah, BM. Before Madeleine.

1023
00:45:33,542 --> 00:45:34,750
Oh, come on, Andy.

1024
00:45:35,250 --> 00:45:35,917
Madeline's nice.

1025
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:37,417
Yeah, I suppose so.

1026
00:45:37,500 --> 00:45:39,333
You’ve got to admit, she's kind of weird.

1027
00:45:39,375 --> 00:45:41,292
She's been good for Tom.

1028
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:43,083
You really think so?

1029
00:45:43,125 --> 00:45:44,625
Sure. Don't you?

1030
00:45:45,125 --> 00:45:48,292
I don’t know, man. Like, fucking
earrings and tattoos on his dick?

1031
00:45:48,667 --> 00:45:50,250
It’s not on his dick, remember?

1032
00:45:50,292 --> 00:45:52,292
And he always fucking smells like incense.

1033
00:45:52,375 --> 00:45:55,625
Come on, Andy. I mean, the
kid is in love. That’s what matters.

1034
00:45:56,042 --> 00:45:58,625
There you go talking about love
again. What do you know about it?

1035
00:45:58,667 --> 00:45:59,625
I... Well?

1036
00:46:00,750 --> 00:46:02,000
Nothing, I guess.

1037
00:46:10,125 --> 00:46:11,292
What the fuck is that?

1038
00:46:11,375 --> 00:46:12,667
It's pretty cool, isn't it?

1039
00:46:12,750 --> 00:46:14,250
What is this, the martian look?

1040
00:46:14,542 --> 00:46:15,417
I kind of like it.

1041
00:46:15,917 --> 00:46:17,458
Mike, you are an asshole.

1042
00:46:17,500 --> 00:46:18,167
How's Madeleine?

1043
00:46:18,250 --> 00:46:19,917
She's great.

1044
00:46:20,334 --> 00:46:20,958
Guess what?

1045
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:22,083
More fucking tattoos?

1046
00:46:22,125 --> 00:46:23,375
I’m gonna ask her to marry me!

1047
00:46:23,417 --> 00:46:24,792
Jesus fucking Christ!

1048
00:46:24,875 --> 00:46:26,208
What is with you?

1049
00:46:26,250 --> 00:46:27,625
Well, just look at him!

1050
00:46:28,125 --> 00:46:32,000
First she turns him into a fucking clown,
and then she tricks him into marriage!

1051
00:46:32,375 --> 00:46:34,125
What's next time, Tom? Lipstick.

1052
00:46:34,500 --> 00:46:36,125
Would you lighten up, Andy?

1053
00:46:36,500 --> 00:46:37,333
But...

1054
00:46:37,375 --> 00:46:38,958
Shit, pink fucking hair?

1055
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:39,958
It's distinctive-

1056
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:40,875
Distinctive?

1057
00:46:41,250 --> 00:46:42,667
It's a fuckin’ freak show!

1058
00:46:43,042 --> 00:46:44,500
Leave Tom alone!

1059
00:46:45,584 --> 00:46:47,667
So, when are you thinking about popping the question?

1060
00:46:47,750 --> 00:46:49,167
I don’t know. Pretty soon.

1061
00:46:49,250 --> 00:46:52,083
I think I'm gonna wait until her birthday next month.

1062
00:46:52,125 --> 00:46:53,125
Give me a break.

1063
00:46:53,167 --> 00:46:54,167
Stop it, Andy!

1064
00:46:54,250 --> 00:46:56,333
And what about you? You still boning Sean?

1065
00:46:56,375 --> 00:46:58,834
Andy, will you shut up about me boning Sean?

1066
00:46:58,917 --> 00:47:00,750
I just want to know what it's like, that's all.

1067
00:47:00,834 --> 00:47:03,417
Sheila Montrose, Sheila Montrose, Sheila Montrose!

1068
00:47:03,500 --> 00:47:05,000
Ouch, ouch, ouch!

1069
00:47:05,042 --> 00:47:07,250
Besides, how do you know that Sean isn't boning me?

1070
00:47:07,292 --> 00:47:08,917
Ha, that's funny.

1071
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:11,417
How do you know... how do you... how...

1072
00:47:13,125 --> 00:47:15,125
How do you know Sean and I aren’t boning each other?

1073
00:47:17,500 --> 00:47:18,125
Shit.

1074
00:47:18,875 --> 00:47:20,250
Since when?

1075
00:47:20,500 --> 00:47:21,875
Just before Christmas.

1076
00:47:22,375 --> 00:47:23,750
Mike, you're kidding me, right?

1077
00:47:23,792 --> 00:47:27,500
No, Andy, I'm not kidding you. Not this time.

1078
00:47:28,500 --> 00:47:30,500
I wasn't going to tell you guys, but...

1079
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:33,000
Do you love him?

1080
00:47:34,250 --> 00:47:36,625
Yeah, I think I do.

1081
00:47:37,792 --> 00:47:39,500
I can't believe any of this.

1082
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,000
I don't know who I am anymore.

1083
00:47:46,250 --> 00:47:48,292
(background traffic)

1084
00:47:48,917 --> 00:47:50,083
What's happening, sis?

1085
00:47:50,125 --> 00:47:50,917
Hey!

1086
00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:51,750
What are you doing?

1087
00:47:51,875 --> 00:47:53,500
Oh, I'm waiting for Carol and Jeanie.

1088
00:47:53,625 --> 00:47:54,375
Where’s Tom?

1089
00:47:54,667 --> 00:47:56,250
Out with his boyfriends.

1090
00:47:56,750 --> 00:47:57,917
I think you mean my boyfriend.

1091
00:47:59,000 --> 00:48:00,250
What? Sean?

1092
00:48:00,292 --> 00:48:00,917
Yup!

1093
00:48:00,959 --> 00:48:01,584
Who?

1094
00:48:01,792 --> 00:48:02,392
My roommate.

1095
00:48:02,459 --> 00:48:03,125
Mike?

1096
00:48:03,500 --> 00:48:04,250
No other.

1097
00:48:06,125 --> 00:48:08,500
Didn't I predict that you'd hook up with a gemini?

1098
00:48:08,542 --> 00:48:09,500
You did.

1099
00:48:09,542 --> 00:48:11,000
And I did. Big time.

1100
00:48:11,042 --> 00:48:11,875
How's it going?

1101
00:48:11,917 --> 00:48:12,917
Great.

1102
00:48:14,250 --> 00:48:16,500
Except he is taking it a bit more seriously than I am.

1103
00:48:17,625 --> 00:48:19,875
That can be hard. I know.

1104
00:48:19,917 --> 00:48:22,708
I keep telling him: Let’s worry about
tomorrow the day after tomorrow.

1105
00:48:22,750 --> 00:48:24,792
Well, do you want me to do a reading for you two?

1106
00:48:25,167 --> 00:48:26,333
Hey, that's an idea.

1107
00:48:26,375 --> 00:48:27,625
Well, any time.

1108
00:48:31,250 --> 00:48:32,000
Oh my God.

1109
00:48:32,042 --> 00:48:33,083
Do you see him?

1110
00:48:33,125 --> 00:48:34,625
Yeah, he's everywhere.

1111
00:48:35,167 --> 00:48:36,375
Who do you suppose he is?

1112
00:48:36,417 --> 00:48:38,875
I don't know, but he’s got a nice bod.

1113
00:48:41,500 --> 00:48:43,042
Oh my god, Carol!

1114
00:48:43,125 --> 00:48:44,000
Where's she going?

1115
00:48:45,125 --> 00:48:48,042
Oh my gosh. Did you see that? Hi, Sean!

1116
00:48:48,125 --> 00:48:48,725
Hi, Jeanie!

1117
00:48:48,792 --> 00:48:49,750
No, what happened?

1118
00:48:49,792 --> 00:48:52,875
The masked guy ran past us and
Carroll just started chasing him.

1119
00:48:52,917 --> 00:48:53,792
No way.

1120
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:54,625
I swear.

1121
00:48:54,667 --> 00:48:56,209
God help him if she catches him.

1122
00:48:56,292 --> 00:48:56,917
Yeah.

1123
00:48:56,959 --> 00:48:59,500
Hey, listen, Maddie, where did
you say Mike and those guys went?

1124
00:48:59,584 --> 00:49:00,184
What guys?

1125
00:49:00,250 --> 00:49:01,958
Oh, Tom, Mike, and Andy.

1126
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:04,500
Um, I think they were going to Sat’s bar?

1127
00:49:04,667 --> 00:49:06,250
Speaking of guys, Jeanie, where’s yours?

1128
00:49:07,125 --> 00:49:10,250
Now, Sean, don't get any ideas about Roger.

1129
00:49:10,292 --> 00:49:13,125
He's got enough to do keeping me happy.

1130
00:49:13,167 --> 00:49:14,625
Selfish, selfish, selfish.

1131
00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:17,167
Where are you going?

1132
00:49:17,250 --> 00:49:19,458
I'm going to wander over to Sat’s and surprise Mike.

1133
00:49:19,500 --> 00:49:21,042
Oh, well come give me a hug.

1134
00:49:22,750 --> 00:49:24,417
And let me know if you two want a reading.

1135
00:49:24,500 --> 00:49:25,125
I will.

1136
00:49:27,167 --> 00:49:28,042
Mike?

1137
00:49:29,125 --> 00:49:29,750
No kidding?

1138
00:49:29,834 --> 00:49:30,542
No kidding.

1139
00:49:31,250 --> 00:49:32,458
Did you catch him, honey?

1140
00:49:32,500 --> 00:49:33,250
No!

1141
00:49:33,875 --> 00:49:37,250
Damn it, I was just about to
grab his sorry ass when I tripped.

1142
00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:38,958
Damn it!

1143
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:40,333
I tore my jeans.

1144
00:49:40,375 --> 00:49:42,000
Why were you even chasing him?

1145
00:49:42,375 --> 00:49:43,625
I think I’m bleeding...

1146
00:49:44,125 --> 00:49:47,917
He just pisses me off, that’s all.
Running around in that mask all the time.

1147
00:49:48,000 --> 00:49:49,542
He's not hurting anyone.

1148
00:49:49,625 --> 00:49:52,792
He’s hurting me! He offends
my esthetic sensibilities.

1149
00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:55,542
Hey, hey!

1150
00:49:57,250 --> 00:49:58,208
Here, let me see that-

1151
00:49:58,250 --> 00:50:00,750
No, it’s okay. It’s just a scrape.

1152
00:50:01,625 --> 00:50:05,417
Though now that bastard has my blood to answer for.

1153
00:50:11,125 --> 00:50:11,792
Hi babe!

1154
00:50:20,334 --> 00:50:24,334
(slow music)

1155
00:50:27,500 --> 00:50:30,667
So, whom shall we invite?

1156
00:50:31,417 --> 00:50:33,750
It's Maddie's birthday. Let her decide.

1157
00:50:35,250 --> 00:50:37,792
You guys, Tom...

1158
00:50:39,625 --> 00:50:41,000
Roger...

1159
00:50:43,167 --> 00:50:44,875
Sean and Mike...

1160
00:50:46,750 --> 00:50:47,625
Andy...

1161
00:50:49,500 --> 00:50:51,042
What about Sheila? Can she come?

1162
00:50:51,125 --> 00:50:53,125
She and Andy hate each other.

1163
00:50:53,167 --> 00:50:56,000
Besides, she's working nights next week.

1164
00:50:57,375 --> 00:50:59,917
This is the cutest Easter basket I've ever seen.

1165
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:02,792
Yeah, isn't it great? Sheila gave it to me.

1166
00:51:03,625 --> 00:51:05,375
Ooh, what about Katie and Allen?

1167
00:51:05,417 --> 00:51:08,292
You know, they're just going to sit
on the couch and make out all night.

1168
00:51:08,792 --> 00:51:09,750
That's fine.

1169
00:51:09,792 --> 00:51:13,000
It'll give us something to gawk
at when the conversation slows.

1170
00:51:13,500 --> 00:51:14,958
What do you think, Maddie?

1171
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:16,500
Sure. Let's invite them.

1172
00:51:17,500 --> 00:51:20,917
So, uh, any idea what Tom’s
getting you for your birthday?

1173
00:51:23,292 --> 00:51:25,500
No, not sure...

1174
00:51:27,917 --> 00:51:30,542
You want to... you want to help me pick out the ring?

1175
00:51:30,625 --> 00:51:33,333
Nah, I feel like that’s probably
something you should do on your own.

1176
00:51:33,375 --> 00:51:34,959
When are you thinking about asking her?

1177
00:51:35,125 --> 00:51:36,292
After the party, I think.

1178
00:51:36,375 --> 00:51:37,000
Damn...

1179
00:51:37,042 --> 00:51:37,792
Yeah.

1180
00:51:37,875 --> 00:51:39,875
I just want to see the look on Andy’s face.

1181
00:51:43,375 --> 00:51:45,167
Nah, come on, just stand in there with me.

1182
00:51:45,750 --> 00:51:47,083
If you really want me to.

1183
00:51:47,125 --> 00:51:48,750
- Yeah, just a little support. - Alright.

1184
00:51:58,709 --> 00:52:02,709
(background chatter)

1185
00:52:06,292 --> 00:52:07,875
I think I like “La Dolce Vita” best.

1186
00:52:07,917 --> 00:52:12,750
No, man, “8 1/2” is the best film ever made.

1187
00:52:12,792 --> 00:52:13,750
I have never seen it.

1188
00:52:13,792 --> 00:52:14,708
Really?

1189
00:52:14,750 --> 00:52:15,375
No.

1190
00:52:15,459 --> 00:52:16,709
Have you seen “Run Lola Run”?

1191
00:52:16,792 --> 00:52:18,042
Like, four times!

1192
00:52:18,125 --> 00:52:19,125
Oh, it’s great, isn’t it?

1193
00:52:19,209 --> 00:52:20,333
Yes, it’s so good!

1194
00:52:20,375 --> 00:52:21,042
I love the-

1195
00:52:21,084 --> 00:52:21,875
Oh.

1196
00:52:22,667 --> 00:52:24,875
I’m gonna go get a drink.

1197
00:52:29,042 --> 00:52:30,667
Well, if it isn’t Mr. Hot stuff.

1198
00:52:30,750 --> 00:52:31,875
Hi, Roger.

1199
00:52:32,292 --> 00:52:35,417
So, quite the little stud, aren’t you?

1200
00:52:36,500 --> 00:52:37,750
Um, whatever...

1201
00:52:39,292 --> 00:52:40,750
Bet you take that...

1202
00:52:41,125 --> 00:52:42,125
Niagara.

1203
00:52:43,625 --> 00:52:44,375
What?

1204
00:52:44,417 --> 00:52:45,875
Yeah, I think that's cheating.

1205
00:52:55,625 --> 00:52:56,250
What?

1206
00:52:58,500 --> 00:52:59,875
How you doing there, Chief?

1207
00:52:59,917 --> 00:53:02,167
I'm getting a hard on watching those two.

1208
00:53:02,250 --> 00:53:05,375
Jesus. Has she got her hand down his pants?

1209
00:53:05,417 --> 00:53:07,167
Yes, she does.

1210
00:53:11,417 --> 00:53:12,875
All right, turn off the lights.

1211
00:53:14,000 --> 00:53:18,083
Happy birthday to you...

1212
00:53:18,125 --> 00:53:21,958
Happy birthday to you...

1213
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:26,500
Happy birthday dear Madeleine...

1214
00:53:26,542 --> 00:53:30,125
Happy birthday to you!

1215
00:53:33,375 --> 00:53:36,542
Here, Sheila said to tell you she made this for you.

1216
00:53:36,625 --> 00:53:39,583
That is so sweet. I wish she could have been here.

1217
00:53:39,625 --> 00:53:41,500
I’m gonna give you mine later, okay?

1218
00:53:48,042 --> 00:53:52,042
Tom, that is the sweetest
thing anyone's ever said to me.

1219
00:53:52,375 --> 00:53:53,250
So you will?

1220
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:55,875
Marry you?

1221
00:53:56,292 --> 00:53:56,959
Yeah.

1222
00:53:58,625 --> 00:53:59,250
No.

1223
00:54:02,375 --> 00:54:03,000
What?

1224
00:54:04,125 --> 00:54:07,542
No, no, no. Tom, I can't marry you.

1225
00:54:09,542 --> 00:54:12,417
But why not?

1226
00:54:13,542 --> 00:54:16,708
I... I don't know where I'll be a year from now.

1227
00:54:16,750 --> 00:54:17,958
I don't know who I'll be.

1228
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:19,917
But I love you, Madeleine.

1229
00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:22,792
And we get along so well.

1230
00:54:22,875 --> 00:54:25,083
And the sex. The sex is so good!

1231
00:54:25,125 --> 00:54:28,167
Yes, it’s been wonderful and
you've been wonderful, but like...

1232
00:54:29,250 --> 00:54:32,167
I don't believe in putting locks on the future.

1233
00:54:32,250 --> 00:54:34,500
But I want to spend my life with you.

1234
00:54:36,875 --> 00:54:39,583
Well, you’ll have to see what fate has in store.

1235
00:54:39,625 --> 00:54:41,667
This is not fate, Madeleine.

1236
00:54:41,750 --> 00:54:42,375
This is...

1237
00:54:43,625 --> 00:54:46,250
Just forget the cards.

1238
00:54:46,292 --> 00:54:48,875
Forget the stars. This is my life.

1239
00:54:48,917 --> 00:54:50,500
This is our... shit.

1240
00:54:51,375 --> 00:54:52,375
Shit.

1241
00:54:55,792 --> 00:54:57,042
Tom, I’m sorry-

1242
00:54:57,125 --> 00:54:59,625
Fuck sorry. Just fuck sorry!

1243
00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:00,833
Please, Tom-

1244
00:55:00,875 --> 00:55:02,083
No, I...

1245
00:55:02,125 --> 00:55:03,500
I... I...

1246
00:55:04,542 --> 00:55:06,542
I thought... I thought...

1247
00:55:08,750 --> 00:55:09,792
Happy birthday.

1248
00:55:12,584 --> 00:55:14,334
(door shuts)

1249
00:55:23,250 --> 00:55:23,959
Oop!

1250
00:55:24,042 --> 00:55:24,667
Gotcha!

1251
00:55:24,750 --> 00:55:25,350
What?

1252
00:55:26,292 --> 00:55:28,625
Now, take off that mask!

1253
00:55:29,042 --> 00:55:32,417
You don't know how long I've been
waiting for someone to say that.

1254
00:55:33,167 --> 00:55:35,167
Now I want you to tell me what you've been up to.

1255
00:55:35,750 --> 00:55:37,334
First, you have to take off your mask.

1256
00:55:37,667 --> 00:55:38,292
What?

1257
00:55:38,667 --> 00:55:40,833
That frown, that upset all the time attitude.

1258
00:55:40,875 --> 00:55:41,875
Fuck you!

1259
00:55:41,917 --> 00:55:43,667
Come on. I took off mine.

1260
00:55:45,375 --> 00:55:46,417
Okay,

1261
00:55:48,625 --> 00:55:49,917
There, that's better.

1262
00:55:50,000 --> 00:55:53,542
Now, will you please tell me why you’ve
been making such an ass of yourself?

1263
00:55:54,875 --> 00:55:59,458
From childhood’s hour I have not been. As others were.

1264
00:55:59,500 --> 00:56:02,500
I have not seen as others saw.

1265
00:56:02,542 --> 00:56:05,875
I could not bring my passions from a common spring.

1266
00:56:06,292 --> 00:56:08,708
You like Edgar Allan Poe?

1267
00:56:08,750 --> 00:56:10,625
Come on, that's my life's creed.

1268
00:56:11,792 --> 00:56:14,875
You're really weird. You know that, right?

1269
00:56:14,917 --> 00:56:15,625
Yeah.

1270
00:56:20,875 --> 00:56:24,750
So what's with the gloomy faces, guys? Somebody die?

1271
00:56:25,250 --> 00:56:26,625
I don't want to talk about it.

1272
00:56:26,792 --> 00:56:29,000
Uh-oh. Trouble in paradise?

1273
00:56:29,042 --> 00:56:30,125
She won't marry me.

1274
00:56:30,500 --> 00:56:31,250
Really?

1275
00:56:32,125 --> 00:56:32,875
How come?

1276
00:56:33,000 --> 00:56:34,250
I don't know.

1277
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:37,500
She's so weird.

1278
00:56:37,750 --> 00:56:39,250
Lucky escape, if you ask me.

1279
00:56:39,750 --> 00:56:41,625
It just fucking hurts so much.

1280
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:43,250
I know how it feels.

1281
00:56:43,417 --> 00:56:45,250
Oh, don't tell me Sean's pulled the bone.

1282
00:56:46,167 --> 00:56:49,917
I invited him to the wedding to
meet Mom and Daryl, and he said no.

1283
00:56:51,167 --> 00:56:52,375
Said he wanted to cool it.

1284
00:56:52,750 --> 00:56:54,375
Oh, that's awful, Mike.

1285
00:56:54,792 --> 00:56:56,458
He said he wants to see other guys.

1286
00:56:56,500 --> 00:56:57,542
Oh well...

1287
00:56:58,417 --> 00:56:59,542
Boo hoo.

1288
00:57:00,375 --> 00:57:02,542
I'm going to start dating girls again.

1289
00:57:02,917 --> 00:57:06,917
Oh god, Jeanie. He was so hurt.

1290
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:08,875
You had no choice, hon.

1291
00:57:10,167 --> 00:57:12,750
I didn't want to hurt him. Just...

1292
00:57:13,375 --> 00:57:14,542
It’s okay, Maddie.

1293
00:57:14,625 --> 00:57:16,375
I’m not ready to get married.

1294
00:57:16,417 --> 00:57:18,458
No, you’re way too young.

1295
00:57:18,500 --> 00:57:19,250
Hey, Maddie.

1296
00:57:20,459 --> 00:57:22,083
Want me to punch him out for you?

1297
00:57:22,125 --> 00:57:23,208
What?

1298
00:57:23,250 --> 00:57:24,583
Roger, what the fuck?

1299
00:57:24,625 --> 00:57:26,500
Hey, I'm not afraid of him.

1300
00:57:28,875 --> 00:57:29,750
I'll get it.

1301
00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:33,292
He’s never gonna want to see me again.

1302
00:57:34,000 --> 00:57:36,875
Hey, girlfriends. Look what I caught.

1303
00:57:40,875 --> 00:57:43,000
Carol, you didn't.

1304
00:57:44,750 --> 00:57:46,250
I don't get it.

1305
00:57:48,375 --> 00:57:50,750
So, here we are.

1306
00:57:51,250 --> 00:57:52,125
Yep.

1307
00:57:53,292 --> 00:57:56,958
Look, uh, you guys are welcome to stay here and

1308
00:57:57,000 --> 00:58:00,542
drown your sorrows, but ol’ Andy has a date.

1309
00:58:00,750 --> 00:58:02,875
Really? With who?

1310
00:58:02,917 --> 00:58:04,334
Uh, with, uh...

1311
00:58:07,250 --> 00:58:08,167
Who?

1312
00:58:09,417 --> 00:58:10,500
With...

1313
00:58:10,542 --> 00:58:13,500
Sheila Montrose, if you must know.

1314
00:58:13,750 --> 00:58:15,792
Sheila Montrose?

1315
00:58:15,875 --> 00:58:17,542
Yeah, Sheila Montrose.

1316
00:58:17,625 --> 00:58:18,625
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa...

1317
00:58:18,667 --> 00:58:20,167
May I quote the book of Andy?

1318
00:58:20,250 --> 00:58:22,625
“Worst mistake of my entire life.”

1319
00:58:22,667 --> 00:58:24,875
Look, I know she ain't the prettiest girl in

1320
00:58:24,917 --> 00:58:27,375
the world, but then I'm not exactly Chris Evans.

1321
00:58:28,667 --> 00:58:30,292
Sheila Montrose.

1322
00:58:30,375 --> 00:58:32,375
I can't believe you.

1323
00:58:32,417 --> 00:58:36,500
Listen, she has a great sense of
humor, and we have a lot of fun together.

1324
00:58:36,917 --> 00:58:38,542
How long have you been seeing her?

1325
00:58:38,625 --> 00:58:39,542
Uh...

1326
00:58:39,625 --> 00:58:41,000
About a month?

1327
00:58:41,042 --> 00:58:44,417
Hey, you guys was always talking
about being in love and all and...

1328
00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:45,500
I...

1329
00:58:45,542 --> 00:58:47,792
Well, I just thought I'd like to try me some of that.

1330
00:58:48,375 --> 00:58:49,125
Um...

1331
00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:56,167
I know, uh, I said some mean things, and
maybe it didn't work out for you two but,

1332
00:58:56,250 --> 00:58:58,917
damn it, being in love has changed you guys.

1333
00:58:59,250 --> 00:59:00,875
You know it has.

1334
00:59:01,417 --> 00:59:03,375
So I figured, uh...

1335
00:59:04,000 --> 00:59:05,667
I had some catching up to do.

1336
00:59:15,167 --> 00:59:16,917
All right, all right, all right.

1337
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:18,292
Leave some for Sheila.

1338
00:59:24,792 --> 00:59:28,792
(upbeat rock music)

1339
01:01:29,084 --> 01:01:33,084
(music fades down)

1340
01:01:39,167 --> 01:01:41,792
Might be, uh, some treasure in here or something?

1341
01:01:42,250 --> 01:01:44,167
What's in here?

1342
01:01:44,250 --> 01:01:45,375
Textbooks and granola bars.

1343
01:01:45,417 --> 01:01:47,333
Which, honestly, better than treasure.

1344
01:01:47,375 --> 01:01:48,417
I say we take it.

1345
01:01:52,667 --> 01:01:55,000
Wait, are we going over there?

1346
01:01:56,709 --> 01:01:58,042
(off-screen laughter)