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Let's see where this goes
Where tomorrow might take us
Dreams in my head find their way to the sun
Hello.
Welcome, honored
guests to your paradise at sea.
Before we embark, there is a mandatory safety briefing.
Safety first.
I like it.
Please check your boarding pass
to locate your muster station.
Why do you think they call it a muster station anyway?
It's the only word they could muster.
Dad is not here.
Shall we leave his jokes on the mainland?
Couldn't resist.
Please try, at least for seven days,
because we would like to enjoy ourselves.
You will enjoy.
Meanwhile, I'll be planning a huge corporate buyout
hopped up on Dramamine.
Look, it's a big ship. You shouldn't get seasick.
I get seasick when I open up a can of tuna fish.
Only you could complain about seeing
four of the most beautiful cities on the Mediterranean.
Who wants to go to several different cities on a boat
when you can stay in one beautiful city
for the whole time?
About 35 million people annually and growing.
Another reason why now has never been a better time to expand
into luxury sea travel.
Have you been reading my pitch?
It's impossible not to.
Your laptop is everywhere that I look.
Yeah, it's because my boss is everywhere that I look.
You have no idea what it's like working for Adam Crandall.
Well, maybe--
I'll never let you go, Jack.
Too tight!
Oh, you're uptight.
We don't complain, though, right?
You gotta get those sea legs, bro.
I'll work on that.
I am so glad that you joined your brother
on this last-minute adventure.
Parker speaks the world of you.
Oh, well he's told me a lot about you.
And, you know, apparently, you're quite the boss
to work for.
I'll take that as a compliment.
OK.
So, uh, you're in PR, correct?
Yes, but I'm actually in between jobs right now.
Well, I'm sure you'll be fine.
Parker says you're the best in the business.
Did he?
Oh, yeah.
Parker is always bragging about his talented little sister.
OK, we're going to go, and we're
going to settle into our cabin.
Well, I'm going to go check out the duty-free shop.
I gotta up my watch game before I start
schmoozing with the bigwigs.
I'll see you two later, hopefully.
- Yeah. - All right.
Ciao.
And, um, don't forget to tweak the waterfalls
for the new cash flow model.
The investors want to make sure we hit the milestones.
Yeah, I'm on that, Adam.
I got you.
If this deal closes, we'll never have to work again.
Well, I-- I won't.
You still will.
But I'm sure they'll hire you, you know, for the handover,
with a much bigger salary of course.
- OK. - Later.
Bye.
Emily, so nice to meet you.
Yeah, you too.
What?
Stop flirting with my boss.
I'm not flirting.
I was being nice.
- Be neutral. - OK.
Shall we go to the room now?
You go to your room and take this to mine, please.
I gotta go check the lifeboats.
OK.
You do you.
Hi, George.
Let me guess, you're calling to tell me
how important this report is, even
though you know how seriously I take all of my assignments.
You know me too well.
Well, we've been working together for 10 years.
I better.
Yes, and you know I trust you.
You've never let me down.
But this time, you definitely can't let me
down, because this one is big.
Yeah, it all happened so fast.
You kind of have to fill me in on this one.
We were hired by Staley
and Scholes Venture Capital.
They're looking to acquire the luxury cruise division
from the Crandall Corporation.
But they need you to find out if there's any good reasons
for them not to invest.
OK, got it.
I don't want you to go analog on me.
Put the notepad down and upload your findings
on the app like everyone else.
Well, I can tell you that the bathrobe needs to be updated.
It's very scratchy.
Again, don't tell me.
Just upload it to the app.
George, you know I do my best work when I'm unplugged.
I wish we had the time for you to do
your normal routine, but they need
your final report before you reach Dubrovnik on Friday.
Understood.
But I still need to be incognito, right?
I'm supposed to be on vacation.
And I can't do that with my nose in a phone.
Kelly, you know you're my best rep.
I'm sure you'll figure it out.
I love it when you treat it like it's Mission Impossible.
Whatever it takes to deliver on this one.
I'm counting on you. - OK.
Attention, guests, please
report to your muster stations.
OK, George, gotta go.
I got to go check the safety protocols,
and then I'm going to check out the vibe in the dining room.
Return, report, and upload.
Aye aye, Captain.
Oh!
Uh-- are you OK?
Uh, yeah.
What are you doing?
I'm just preparing for the inevitable "what if."
Is this your first cruise?
No, but hopefully it is my last.
How about you?
Is this your first? - No.
LA born and raised.
I'm an ocean girl.
Oh, well, what's your favorite ocean?
And please, be Pacific.
Sorry, my sister accuses me of having resting dad humor.
It's like whatever wordplay bounces into my head,
I just blurt it out.
I'm trying to cure myself.
I'm Parker.
Kelly.
Hi, Kelly.
Um, so do you-- do you like to travel?
I do actually.
It's, uh, well, kind of my passion.
So if you need any travel tips, you could just ask me.
Yeah, nope.
I'm pretty much going to stay here on the boat
and just get a lot of work done.
Oh, that's a shame.
You know what's a shame is these pipes look pretty rusty.
But, you know, the Wi-Fi is really good on the boat now.
I know.
It's a shame too.
I just like it better when you're off the grid, you know?
Yeah. You know what?
See, I love the grid.
I mean, I'll step out of it a little bit here,
a little bit there, but I'm a grid man.
Real risk taker, huh?
Well, I love a risk.
I just want the word "calculated"
right in front of it.
Let me guess, finance guy.
Worse, I'm also a lawyer.
I am in charge of mergers and acquisitions
for the Crandall Corporation, which is this.
Wow, that is a big deal.
How does it feel to have your boss on the cover
of every magazine in the world?
Oh, I would never know.
Yeah, except for that he takes them all, he cuts them out,
he frames them, and he hangs them all over the office.
Other than that, really humble guy.
Huh.
Yeah.
What about you?
What do you do?
Uh, I make it a point of not talking about work on vacation.
Well, that's funny, because I make it
a point not to go on vacation.
I think vacations are for the unfulfilled.
I mean, it's the only excuse I have for my workaholic nature.
And you, what's your excuse?
Pardon me?
Well, you're dressed so fancy--
all corporate-- for someone who's here to relax.
When in Rome, dress fancy.
Right?
I mean, when we're out to sea, it'll be a different ball game.
I'm looking forward to that transformation.
If you ever leave the Wi-Fi zone.
I won't.
Speaking of which, I have some waterfalls
that I need to attend to. - Oh.
Yeah. Nice to meet you.
Do you mean the Due Rocche waterfalls in Palermo?
No, no, I mean the boring spreadsheet kind.
Oh.
Well, have fun with that.
I definitely won't.
- Hey. - Hi.
I'm Emily.
Oh, Kelly.
Well, welcome to the singles section.
Apparently, they don't think we need a view or any single men
to talk to. - Yeah.
It's a good start.
I see that.
Hmm.
But seriously, have you noticed
there aren't many eligible bachelors on this cruise?
Uh, I met one.
Yeah.
A bit of an odd duck, but I did.
Oh, actually, he is swimming over here right now.
Yeah, he's definitely odd.
Cute though, right?
Yeah, I don't see it.
Really?
Really.
Yeah, it might be because he's my brother.
That might be why.
OK.
Nailed the odd part.
Did somebody say odd?
No.
I mean, yes, we--
we said, what are the "odds-uh."
That's a fun game.
Let's figure it out.
I was an actuary as an intern for a summer.
So let's just do this thing.
If the cruise ship is full to capacity,
and we're not including the staff,
the odds of us being at the same table would be 2,500 to 1.
That's "actuary" a very good guess.
Oh, did you hear that?
A woman after my own laugh.
No, please do not encourage him.
OK? - Sorry.
I'll stop.
I was full on choking out a grizzly bear
with my bare hands. I'm not kidding.
- My brother recorded it. - Is that Adam Crandall?
Yeah.
That's why I am still clocked in.
You didn't say he was going to be on board.
No, I didn't.
Because, you know what, I knew that he would make himself
known sooner rather than later.
Why isn't he at the singles table?
Yeah, because he's at that table.
He's entertaining the entire board of Staley and Scholes.
Right, because they're looking to buy
out Crandall Cruise Lines.
Of course.
How'd you know that?
Because you said that you were an M&A
and that Adam was your boss, and I--
I put two and two together.
- You're smart. - Yeah.
Just don't add it up yet, because there's
a lot of hurdles we gotta leap first,
which is why I've got my laptop open.
Well, will you just get it done, please?
I promise I will take you on another vacation
after this vacation as soon as I close this.
But until then, I am clocked in and locked in.
But you promised me you'd take a break
and we'd do that walking tour of Palermo.
And you are not backing out of it.
No, I'm not. We are going to do that.
- We better do-- - We're doing it.
OK. Hey, you should come with us.
- Oh, I'd love to. - Great.
Bellissimo.
Salute, huh?
Yes.
Cheers.
We would like to remind all passengers that
they must return from their excursions on time, as we
cannot wait for any latecomers.
Any guests that are left behind must
make their own travel arrangements
to the next port of call.
We wish you all a wonderful day in Palermo.
Look at this!
There it is.
Yes.
Wow, look at that.
How's this?
- How's this? - Perfect.
Is this one good?
OK?
Yeah.
Like a tree.
1, 2, 3.
You know, I got to give it to you, Parker.
You were actually fun today.
Oh, what are you talking about?
I'm always fun.
No, I mean, like you used to be on our family vacations.
I think I like vacation Parker better too.
I am the same guy--
just with the crushing weight of corporate America on my back
all the time.
Sorry.
Speaking of responsibility, just excuse me a minute.
Yeah? - So what are you talking about?
I am fun.
I'm fun.
I just mean, you know, you're more present lately.
It's nice. - Present?
Yes.
Present?
Like you were present with the waiter? Uh
huh, si, si.
--did the walking tour of Palermo today.
The cruise line was very helpful with bookings and reservations.
However, some of the attractions have become tourist traps.
An updated list of vendors would be very helpful.
Two cannolis later?
They're really good. And he's also very handsome.
- Yeah, I don't want to hear. - When in Italy, you have to--
So sorry, guys.
Yeah.
So what happened to no work talk while on vacation?
You are so right.
I am back to having fun.
Just fun.
What about you guys? What do you have today?
More work?
Well, the only work I will be doing is on my tan on the beach.
I want to go into my work interviews
looking well rested, successful, and a little bronzed.
I will see you at dinner, and please don't work too hard.
Yeah, please wear sunscreen, because no one wants
to hire a lobster for a PR rep!
Got it!
Well, what about you?
Do you have more work, or do you want
to come see waterfall with me?
I would love to see the waterfall.
I looked it up.
It looks amazing.
I would love to join you.
You don't have more obligations with Mr. Crandall?
So, no, he is doing a godfather tour of Corleon--
Corleon-ee, Corle-oney?
Corleone.
So he said I should take the day off.
Well, that's an offer you can't refuse.
I didn't refuse it, which is why I want to be present and
go see the waterfall.
It was a--
I made a joke.
You know, the line?
What line?
I'll make him an offer he can't refuse.
What?
From the Godfather.
Yeah-- I haven't seen that movie.
What?
I know.
It's something I'm not very proud of.
I haven't gotten around to it.
My sister teases me about it.
I'll watch it. - You know what?
I'm not going to judge.
Thank you.
I haven't seen Star Wars.
- What? - Yeah.
What? Hold on.
What?
OK, you haven't--
OK, no.
I know, we're both being vulnerable here.
I get that.
It's a safe space.
So do you want to go see about a waterfall with me?
You want to finish our desserts
First?
Eh, leave the cake.
Take the cannoli.
Again, from the God-- never mind.
I don't know if this is such a good idea.
I'm starting to get worried about time.
That's why we're doing the horseback
auction instead of hiking.
We're going to be back with over an hour to spare.
We are good.
Ah, and there are our stallions.
Though they look a little more like ponies.
Yeah!
No, those are donkeys.
- What? - Yeah.
How do you know?
Well, because I did my fifth grade science fair project
on equine animals, and these are definitely the species
equus asinus.
Bravo, asino.
He knows his things.
So these are your donkeys, and these are your hats.
- Oh. - Oh.
Yes.
Um, the-- the pamphlet said horseback.
Well, you were the last one to book.
So the first group got all the horses,
and this is what we have left.
Please. - OK.
I mean, it'll be fine, right? - Yeah.
- It's fine. - No.
You know what, the donkey is actually
smarter, safer than the horse.
Give me the phone.
That's according to my World Book Encyclopedia knowledge.
Easy, boy.
I hope your work was peer reviewed.
You swing your leg around.
Hey, yes.
Swing your leg.
- You got it. - OK.
Careful the hat. Like this.
Nice.
Signore, where's your donkey?
What do you mean?
Aren't you our guide?
With donkeys, you don't need a guide.
You need this.
And they will follow.
I'm sorry, are we in a Looney Tunes episode.
Don't worry, they know the way.
Come on, let's go.
Let's go.
Hey, buddy.
Yeah.
Yee-haw!
Come on!
Enjoy!
Hey, don't lose the hat.
I don't know about this.
I think I'm getting the hang of this.
And you know what, now that I see the terrain,
I am very glad we got the safer option.
Yeah, it's true.
Horses, they're flight animals, preferring to flee from danger,
where donkeys, they've evolved to be
a little bit more cautious.
And more food motivated, obviously.
Honestly, I don't think a horse
would care at all about us.
I'd laugh, but I'm still a little concerned about the fact
that we don't have the handler with us.
I mean, you mounted your seat like a pro,
but you saw how much help I needed.
Well, you know what, you got nothing to worry about.
I did a dude ranch for a bachelor weekend once.
And I was awarded the best cowhand, I might add.
So you're good.
I know my way around a corral.
That's impressive.
Ooh, you hear that?
We're almost there.
Whoa.
Parker, are you seeing this?
Did you see it?
Look!
Wow.
It's beautiful.
Come on.
Stop.
Wow.
Wow!
Um, I'm going to need you to help me get out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right, my lady.
Thank you. OK.
Ready?
You got your leg around?
Boom, there you go.
Come here.
Ooh, that's a girl.
Parker, you gotta see this!
I'm coming!
This is incredible!
Come here. Come here, come here, come here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, all right.
Ready?
Smile.
Woo!
Now, this is an excursion.
And I didn't think you liked to be off the grid.
Ah, you know, this, it's grid adjacent.
Still pretty wild of you.
When I first met you, I never thought
you'd get off the lido deck.
Well, you can blame my sister.
Nothing like a little sibling rivalry to motivate.
Yeah, but look at me having all sorts of spontaneous fun.
I got a gorgeous waterfall.
I'm standing next to a beautiful woman
while our trusty steeds await our--
--return.
Come back!
Donkey!
Donkeys!
My hat!
Leave it!
No, he's going to charge us for it he said.
How are donkeys so fast now?
They're getting away!
Less talking!
More running!
Oh, my back.
My back.
They're totally gone.
Oh!
How did they get loose?
I must have tied them up wrong.
What, I thought you won best cowhand?
I was terrible at tying knots.
What do we do?
We gotta run.
Please note, we will be departing
from port in one hour.
So ensure you, your belongings, and your entire party
are safely on board.
Hey, Emily.
Hey!
You hit the beach yet?
I did.
Got the perfect amount of sunburn
and my trashy Gothic romance novel is almost reading itself.
So.
Hey, how was the Godfather tour?
It was awesome.
I basically acted out the whole entire film.
You know, I can't believe your brother
still hasn't seen it yet.
I think we might need to rough him up for that.
Oh, no, no, no.
Never take sides against the family.
Who are you?
Where is your brother, anyway?
Is he locked up in his room someplace?
He's actually out with a really cute
girl from the singles table. - Parker?
Yeah.
Well, they should be back any minute.
He said he wants to play it safe since the boat waits for no man.
I'm just glad he's putting himself out there.
It's about time, right?
I'd say.
Hey, I'm actually going to shuffle
on up to the shuffleboard.
What do you think about maybe joining me?
Well, I mean, I was going to wait for those guys.
But I could play while I wait.
He's a big boy.
I think he'll be fine.
We're not going to be fine.
The boat's going to leave in an hour.
We're never going to make it. - Not with that attitude.
OK, we got to stay positive, and they're going to fix it.
Listen, the navigation says even if we do,
it's an hour and 16 minutes away.
So we'll tell him to step on it, OK?
Italian drivers are very fast.
OK, listen, even if he does get it started--
Yeah!
Hey!
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
This is not OK!
Oh, we must be at the wrong dock.
No, we're not.
Look.
Oh, that is so our boat.
Ah, why didn't they wait for us?
Because they don't wait for anybody.
It's their policy!
I have to be on that ship.
My career depends on it. - Mine too.
I thought you were on vacation.
Yes, I am.
I am.
If I don't relax when I'm on vacation,
I'm going to be very stressed when I get back to work.
Yeah, well, my laptop and my career
are literally sailing away on that ship.
Everything depends on me being on that boat.
Why are we lying down?
Because I tweaked my back on the run.
Oh, my gosh. Are you OK?
Yeah, I'm fine. No, it happens.
I just-- I need to stretch it out a little.
You know what, I don't think we really
have time to stretch it out.
I think we have to go get the port agent and
see what's-- if he can help us. OK?
OK.
Oh, we got this.
All right, let's go.
Hello.
You must be Kelly Coates and Parker Andrews.
Unfortunately, yes.
Yeah, you missed the ship.
Yeah.
No, we're aware of that.
We warned you.
The ship, it waits for no man.
And it waits for no woman also.
Understood.
Yeah, thank you for making that point.
However, here we are.
Still need to make it to the next port in Syracuse.
You really should've taken a ship.
You know, we wanted to take the ship,
but we missed the ship.
Are there any other options maybe?
Can we maybe take a plane?
The nearest airport to Syracuse is Catania.
But you won't catch a flight at this hour.
Right.
You could try in the morning, but all the flights,
they connect to Rome.
OK.
How about a train?
Is there a night train we could take?
I would suggest that you hire a car
and you drive through the night.
- Yes! - Great idea.
Yes.
I have just the thing for you.
Ooh.
My twin brother, Vincenzo, he has a lovely company in town.
He will fix you up.
I will tell him that you are coming.
But you need to hurry, huh, because it's tourist season.
He may not have many cars available.
He's a little bit stubborn, huh.
So you need to--
Grazie mille.
Yeah, grazie.
Americano.
I am very sorry to disappoint you,
but we have no more car available.
What do you mean?
Hold on a second.
We've been waiting in line for 45 minutes!
Why didn't you tell us that?
It's written here.
In Italian.
We don't speak Italian.
But we're in Italy.
You should study.
OK.
The other people in line, what about them?
They all have a reservation.
So if you'll kindly step aside for the next customer.
Pronto. - I got to get back on the boat.
What are we going to do?
I don't know.
OK.
You are in luck.
I have just received a cancellation,
so there is one car available.
Great.
If you'll kindly give me your credit
card and driver's license, I will hold it for you.
Here's a card.
I don't have my driver's license.
What? Why?
I brought my passport.
I don't have two forms of identification.
I'm not opening a bank account. - You know what, it's fine.
It's fine.
We'll just-- we're going to use mine.
It's in here somewhere.
I will need it to hold the reservation.
I am aware.
It's right here.
I know it's right-- It's right here.
I can help you if you let me help you.
No, I got it.
Here.
You know what-- thanks, got it.
Thank you.
Hold on, hold on.
Uno momento.
Hah!
Boom!
I'm very sorry, but in the time
it took you to find your license,
there was an online booking for this automobile.
- Come one! - My apologies.
I do not control the bookings.
Perhaps you should try the night train.
The what?
Your brother said that there was no night train--
that we should rent a car.
Of course, because Vito is a good brother,
and I give him 10% for the referrals.
That is a little upsetting, because we
clearly needed to rent a car.
No time to argue.
Your train, it leaves in less than 20 minutes.
Not nice!
Ah!
Running is killing my back! - OK!
Train station should be right up around this corner, OK?
Do not stop to get tickets!
Just-- just get right on the train.
We gotta buy tickets! They're going to kick us off!
You can get them on the train, OK?
Just trust me.
- I trust you. - OK.
I trust you.
We cannot miss this!
Frank, I want to hear the rest of that story.
That is a good one.
All right.
Hello, hello, hello there.
Do you mind if I borrow this young lady for a second?
Yeah.
Good to see you guys.
Hey, have you heard anything?
Last I heard, they're in line for a rental car,
and then they just straight up stopped answering.
So I hope he's OK.
Well, me too.
He usually spends most of his time in a spreadsheet.
This wasn't exactly his, uh, strong suit.
I'm just glad he's got Kelly with him.
I mean, she's going to look after him.
I mean, if they're back to Syracuse by noon tomorrow,
they should be fine, right?
Yeah.
He's probably panicking without his laptop attached to his lap.
I need that dude's nose in that laptop more than anyone.
Come on, that's four days away.
He's definitely going to be back by then.
He's got his health, his passport,
and he's with a beautiful, intelligent woman.
I think this is good for him.
That's one way to look at it.
I see the door!
We're almost there.
Are you with me?
I'm with you.
I got you.
Are you OK.
We're good!
Oh, my!
OK.
Track two.
Track two!
Oh, there!
Track two!
Wait!
Yeah!
OK.
Are you OK?
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm good.
We did it.
I'm good.
OK.
Let's see if we can get some seats.
Oh, no.
Hello.
OK.
OK, I'm starting to sense a theme here.
A little pattern here.
I hope we can find a seat.
What if we sit in the caboose hobo style?
I mean, it's gotta be somewhere with a seat, right?
Oh, what do you think?
Yeah, it's better than nothing.
That's right.
- Hello. - Ciao.
Ciao.
Hello.
Thank you.
I am never riding a donkey again.
Hey, it's not the animals' fault.
We shouldn't have gotten off them in the first place.
In fact, I shouldn't have gone on the excursion at all.
It was wildly irresponsible.
OK, it was also so fun, and not to mention, gorgeous.
Wow.
Yeah, that's a beautiful picture.
You know, why don't you text that to me.
I'm going to print it up, frame it, and
hang it on my home office wall, because I'm
going to get fired this week.
Parker, you gotta breathe, OK?
You missed one stop.
If your boss wants to fire you for an honest mistake,
you're not meant to be there, OK?
No, sorry.
I'm just-- you know, I'm just a little on edge.
Forgive me, I don't know why.
I'm not going to get any sleep tonight, my back's already hurt,
and I've got the laptop withdrawals.
Oh, right, the precious laptop.
Oh, you're one to talk, you and that precious notepad
of yours.
What are you talking about?
Uh, the notepad that fell out of your purse.
When I tried to hand it back to you,
you snatched it away like it was your middle school diary.
I did not do that.
What are you hiding in there, hmm, Kelly?
Kelly, why don't you tell me what's inside of it.
Nothing.
- Well, then show me. - No.
I wouldn't have taken it, but that proves to me
that you're hiding something.
It is a work thing, and I don't
want to talk about it about it.
Why, because you're on vacation?
Yes! Is that OK?
- That's fine. - Great!
- Sure. - Fine.
- Good. - Great.
Thank you.
OK, I am going to try to get some sleep.
Don't get too comfortable.
We're switching trains in Messina.
OK.
Seriously, this is going to be the longest night ever.
That's weird.
This is an express train.
It's not meant to make local stops.
Are they stopping the train because we
didn't pay for the tickets?
I told you we should have paid for the tickets.
Because we didn't buy tickets?
I bought them online, OK?
Just relax.
Do you speak English?
English?
The train workers are going on strike.
In the middle of the night?
They happen when they happen.
What's going to happen now?
The train is going to stop in the next town,
and we're all going to get off.
Well, how long is that going to take?
Could be a few hours.
Could be a few days.
OK.
How are you so calm?
This happens all the time in Italy.
We got used to it.
How are the buses.
Do you think we could get one?
In the morning, yes.
But at this hour, it's going to be hard.
Taxis?
Can we get a cab to take us?
I doubt it.
Taxis are really rare when there is a strike.
Um, what are the workers upset about?
Like, why are they striking?
Judging by the picket signs, it
looks like they are worried about losing their jobs.
We've got that in common.
You think you could translate for me?
I suppose.
Great.
What is she doing?
Hi!
I'm so-- excuse me. Sorry.
I know it's late.
I know we're all tired.
We're all a little bit stressed.
But if you want to just give me a moment of your time,
I think I have something that could cheer you up a little.
Take a look at this handsome American by my side.
He might look like an average tourist, but he's not.
This is Parker Andrews, powerful businessman.
And he is key to helping you save your jobs.
Parker is in Italy to secure a large business deal that
will help bring more tourism and help bring
more investments to your area.
And that, in turn, would give more
business to the train company, which could help save your jobs.
They like Sicily as it is.
They don't want too many tourists here.
I respect that.
But that is the beauty of the company that he is dealing with.
They are about quality, not quantity.
So you will always have tourism, but
they will ensure that the service and the tours that they
bring will be of the highest standard
that the Italian people can be proud of.
And how they can be sure of that?
Oh, because I work for the company that makes sure
his company meet the highest standards.
So I promise you that I will not
allow this deal to go through unless it
is good for the Italian people.
So I'm not asking you not to strike, OK?
I'm asking you to wait six hours so
that we can get back on the ship and finish our business.
So what do you say?
Can you help us help you?
Yeah?
Yes!
Oh, take my number.
If you need anything, just give me a call.
- Bye. - Thank you.
Bye.
OK.
You are very lucky, Miss America.
Yes, I know. I know.
I did not actually think that that was going to work.
You're strong.
I like that.
And I'm from Syracuse, so can go home.
Ah, prego.
Thank you.
Let's get us some good seats.
I'm coming in.
I'm dropping back.
It's fourth and 9.
A lot of pressure.
I dop back.
I see John on the post.
I drop back.
Then I throw the ball.
Completion and touchdown.
OK, I win.
We win.
All right?
Hey, would you guys excuse me real quick?
Hi.
Hey.
Oh, investor time.
Hope I'm not intruding.
Absolutely not.
You're saving me.
These guys are, like, blasting me with question after question.
Let's just say I could use your brother right now.
Oh, well, I have good news. I think.
So looks like their service is pretty spotty,
but the last text I got said they caught a night
train that's going to get them into Syracuse
before we get to port.
That is smooth jazz to my ears.
I can't do this alone much longer.
I'm running out of stories.
Well, in the meantime, maybe I could help you,
like, schmooze it up a bit.
Oh?
I'm in PR.
After all, it's kind of my thang.
Then by all means, schmooze away.
You want to introduce me?
OK.
Ladies and gentlemen, I would like you to meet Emily.
This is the sister of our lead counsel
and a wonderful new friend.
Yeah, see, I would love to talk,
but I actually have a strict mandatory dance
policy when I'm at a jazz club.
So maybe you can help me with that.
Judy, let's hit the floor and get crazy.
Just when I thought our seats couldn't get any worse.
Just be grateful you are on a moving train.
So, do you want to talk about this?
Which part?
Oh, I don't even know where to start.
The part where you delivered a riveting speech
to break a workers strike in Sicily, or the fact
that you casually mentioned that you work
for the company that's trying to kill the deal
that I'm trying to make.
OK, not what we're doing.
It's what you did for the Davies
Capital Rising Phoenix deal.
If I remember correctly, I read that on the front page
of the journal. - Uh huh.
And if you read past the headline,
you would also have seen that that was because they
had fraudulent product reviews.
Yeah.
Well, our cruise line doesn't.
And I never said you did.
Hmm.
Cornetto? - No, thanks.
Brushed my teeth already.
Where'd you get a toothbrush?
Um, here.
You can have my spare.
I have everything in here.
Yeah, you do have everything in that little bag,
including a notebook-- a notebook
in which you write nasty things about the cruise ship.
Parker, it is my job.
And frankly, it is none of your business.
Uh, it's a little bit--
And may I remind you that I did not have
to do what I did back there.
I chose to do it so that you would
have a chance to get back on your boat and close your deal.
OK?
So I think a little grazie mille or at least a grazie uno
would be appropriate.
It is why I offered you a Cornetto.
I am grateful.
I am very grateful.
I'm also kind of blown away.
Like, literally don't know how to process
what you did back there.
It was like a speech from Remember the Titans and
Glengarry Glen Ross.
I mean, I'm still in shock over it.
And I also am very stressed out about the situation
that we're in right now.
And when I'm stressed, I make a lot of jokes.
And my jokes are sarcastic, and the sarcasm
gets me into a lot of trouble.
You should stick to your dad jokes.
Well, I can't make them unless I'm calm.
Hmm, that's actually very useful information.
So what's up?
You got some dirt you want to show
me in that notebook of yours?
Something about the cruise?
Any inside intel you can give me?
First off, you know I can't do that.
And second off, it's kind of hard to review
a boat that you are not aboard.
So you want to get back on that as badly as I do, huh?
I mean, I think I'm a little more chill about it
than you in general.
But, you know, yeah, it's be nice.
Chill?
Did you see you're chill?
Yeah.
I'd say it's more like cold blooded.
You stood on a bench, and you laid it out.
You could get the Newsies to stop dancing and start
selling papes for Pulitzer.
It's just--
I like you when you're stressed.
You know, I'm one third sarcastic myself?
You don't say.
Yeah, on my Irish side.
Naturally.
We should get some rest.
Yeah.
Otherwise, tomorrow's going to be rough.
Don't get too comfortable.
We got to change trains in Messina.
Thank you for informing me.
Hey, I'll be Mess-seeing-ya later.
Oh, that is not one of your best puns.
Are you Syracus-ing me of making a bad joke?
Stop, please.
You're really off your game.
I told you I was stressed.
Here-- you can use that.
It's been a while, but I've been told that it's comfy.
Afraid I'm going to give it a bad review?
No, I'm pretty confident in the quality.
Hmm.
OK.
Four and half stars.
I'll take it.
You gotta be kidding me.
What's wrong?
My back went from bad to worse after sleeping
on that sardine can last night.
OK, well, let's get you back to the ship, OK?
I'm sure there's a massage therapist there
that can make you feel better. - Oh, that sounds like heaven.
The only problem is I have to physically
make it back onto the ship.
It really hurts!
It's that bad, huh?
Oh, yeah.
Well, got us a cab.
You know, the pain, it's like lightning.
I never know when it's going to--
--strike.
Man, it's really raining here!
Come on.
Let's go.
OK, let's get you in.
Come on. All right.
Got it.
Hello!
Can you let me in?
Come on!
OK!
Un momento, per favore.
I don't have any service. Do you have service?
Yeah, I do.
OK, can you look up the address for the port?
Actually, how many ports can there be?
I'm just going to ask for the port.
No, no, no, no, no.
Un momento. They're not at the port.
The storm-- they gotta reroute the ship.
OK, how long are they delayed?
They're not going there at all.
They're finding another port to avoid the storm.
Uh-- - OK.
OK. OK.
OK, what are we going to do?
Hotel Colomba, per favore.
Come on!
Hi.
Hello. - Hi.
How can I help you?
Uh, hi, Francesca.
My name is Parker Andrews, and I'd
like to reserve two executive suites for early check in.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I don't believe we have availability.
I know you're supposed to say that.
But I also know that luxury resorts
such as the Hotel Colomba, they hold back certain accommodations
for VIP members.
Sorry, I am not authorized to disclose that information,
but I would be happy to try and book you
with one of our competitors.
OK, well, luckily, I am authorized.
So I'm Adam Crandall's personal attorney,
and he loves this resort of all the resorts that he owns,
even the ones that float on the sea.
And he said, I simply must stay here.
So if you want, I can call him.
Oh, no, that won't be necessary.
I'll be right back with your room keys.
Matteo,.
You know, you could have led with the fancy business card
and the Adam Crandall mention.
Yeah, I know.
I don't like the name drop.
Um, but you could also thank me for the luxury suite, Parker.
You could say that.
Apologies.
Thank you so much!
Oh, my back.
Ooh.
Oh. I'm sorry.
It's fine. It's OK.
I just need a little rest.
You just text me when you're ready to go.
Because you know, as soon as that weather clears,
we got to get back on the road. - Right.
But the question is, where do we go?
We don't even know where the boat's going.
Well, we'll stay on top of it.
We cannot miss it a third time.
No, I will not let that happen.
I don't know what to tell you, George.
We're in the middle of a medicane here.
Excuse me.
What's a--
Oh, it's a Mediterranean hurricane.
Look it up. It's real.
I don't want to look up anything
unless it's your QC report on the company's server.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
And I am doing my absolute best.
I'm actually staying at their top tier hotel
in Syracuse, which technically will be a part of the buyout.
So I'm doing quality control as we speak.
That's really great to know, Kelly.
But the client wants a QC report on their cruise
liner, not their hotels.
I need you back on the boat now.
OK, you got it.
Hello?
Oh, OK.
It's like heaven, Maria.
I am doing everything I can to get back.
In fact, I threw out my back trying to do so.
I had no idea that a freak storm was going to send the ship
to the other side of Italy.
Well, I know it's not your fault.
I'm just getting really stressed over here
dealing with all these suits.
You know what I'm saying?
The storm and the reroute kind of
freaked them out with the unpredictability
of this type of investment.
So I'm just hoping it doesn't scare them, you know?
That's just a negotiation tactic.
That's why we have force majeure built into the deal.
Don't sweat that.
They're just-- they're bluffing.
So how is it out there, huh?
Are you weathering the storm.
Are you guys drenched?
Well, it hasn't rained a drop.
They rerouted us to some Greek isle.
I don't know, Corfu or something like that.
So we missed the storm entirely.
The sun's shining, and I'm on my second frozen cocktail.
Seriously?
Well, how are the waves out there, man?
Are they-- are they huge?
It's like glass out here.
I could easily barefoot water ski.
Hey, that actually reminds me--
I know a dude in Lake Como that has the sickest,
most righteous setup.
We are going after we close this bad boy.
If-- if we close.
I don't like that talk, man.
I think I found a bit of a situation out here.
I don't like that either.
What's going on?
You know the woman that I'm stuck here with from the cruise?
Oh, the cutie with the Mary Poppins bag?
Wait, how do you know about the Mary Poppins bag?
Well, your sister told me.
Anyway, what's wrong?
She sounds like the good kind of problem, Parker.
I found out that she is the secret shopper
for Staley and Scholes due diligence and quality control.
Oh, wait, excuse me.
Excuse me.
- Valeria, right? - Yeah.
All right. Can I get some calamari?
- Yeah, sure. - Excellent.
Thank you. - Adam.
Oh, Valeria-- grilled, please.
Adam?
Adam, are you there?
Sorry, I was ordering some calamari.
No carbs though.
I mean, it's bad news, but it's not-- it's not all bad.
Are you kidding me?
This is amazing.
It's almost like you planned it. - How do you figure?
Think about it.
The only person that could sink this ship
here isn't even on the boat.
I love it.
Well, we're going to be back on the boat,
and then I'm going to strategize--
Strategy has changed, my friend.
Your new goal is to stall her as long as you can.
But she just wants to do her job.
And so do you, right?
Yes.
So your job is to keep her off the boat.
At least until Dubrovnik-- that's when I really need you.
We don't have to hide anything.
We're not hiding anything.
She's probably going to give a positive review anyway.
But good or bad doesn't hurt any of us if she's just a little,
uh, delayed.
OK, so-- so what are you suggesting that I do?
You said your back was hurt, right?
Just milk that a little bit. - You know what?
I feel like I got to get back, and I'm going to help
you settle the investors down.
You said they were getting restless, right?
Emily has been a big help.
I'll just lean on her until you get back.
You know, I'm not so comfortable with you
spending time with my sister. I mean--
Hey, hey, I gotta bail, my man.
They're about to do poolside karaoke,
and my jam is about to come up.
OK?
Stick to the new plan.
Adam.
Adam?
Adam!
I'm coming!
Oh, hi.
- Hello. - Hi.
Sorry to bother you, sir.
I just wanted to say how sorry I was for the misunderstanding
about the rooms.
No, no, no.
It's-- it was-- it's totally fine.
And this is from the gift shop.
- You shouldn't have. - I didn't.
Miss Kelly Coates asked me to drop it off for her.
Oh, well, thank you.
Arrivederci.
Yeah, arrive-- bye.
Morning!
Thought you might need a wardrobe change
for part two of our journey.
PS, the backpack is no Mary Poppins bag, but it will do.
Mr. Andrews, you clean up nice.
Grazie mille.
This is some secret shopping I can get behind.
So thank you.
You got to tell me how much they cost,
because I want to pay you back. - No, no, no, no, no.
Let it be my gift.
I mean, you spoiled me with the VIP suite after all.
Technically, that was an expense account.
But I will take the credit.
Ah, grazie.
Mm.
You look really nice, by the way.
I'm a secret shopper for work and for fun.
So, are you ready to start planning?
Because we have a lot to look at.
Yes, let's.
The storm shut down all transportation today,
but I figured that we could look at options for to--
Oh.
Is it still that bad?
Yeah, oh.
It just-- it comes in waves.
I got plenty of rest.
I put the ice on it.
I think I need to go see a doctor.
And we're in Italy, so you know how that's going to go.
I already got you an appointment.
Wow. How did you manage that?
Like you said, it's Italy, so health care
is a little different here.
So I couldn't get you a traditional doctor,
but I did get you an alternative healer.
Alternative?
Yeah, I'm not so sure about that.
I figured you'd say that, but that's the only person I
could get on such short notice.
And I don't want to rush this-- however,
we are both under the gun, and we need to be on the road
as soon as the weather clears.
OK?
So why don't we give it a shot?
I gotta lay down for a minute.
Right here in the--
OK, in the restaurant.
So do you want to look at my back?
Yeah, I can go in the--
That won't be necessary.
You don't need to see what's wrong?
No, I can feel it.
Ah.
All the physical pain we experience in life
comes from buried feelings.
And you have a lot to uncover, don't you, Mr. Parker?
Uh, what I do do is love to take about 800 milligrams
of ibuprofen.
So do you have a prescription pad lying around, or?
I could give you some willow bark tea
and send you on your way.
OK.
But that would be the simple solution.
Of course it would.
Treating the symptoms may give you temporary relief.
It won't cure the deeper problems.
You know what, I don't think this is a good fit.
So--
You know what, I think we should listen
to what Dr. Valcano has to say.
You may think my methods are new age,
but in fact they are age old.
Da Vinci himself was trained in my line of treatment.
It's what made him a master of observation.
OK, I'll bite.
What is my pain telling you?
The back is the support of our entire body.
If we have pain, it comes from feeling unsupported in life.
The lower back in particular tells me two things.
The first is you have a deep worry
of losing financial support.
Did you tell her about the merger?
I said nothing.
I swear.
She didn't need to.
The pain told me.
OK, OK.
You're one for one.
What else is my pain saying to you?
The other thing it could suggest deals with love.
Are you OK discussing it with your lover in the room?
She's not.
We're friends.
Yeah.
Yes, your friend.
The pain tells me that you were in a relationship
which hurt you very badly.
The only way to truly heal it is to stop running away.
You know what, I'd rather just get that willow bark tea to go,
and I think we'll be on our way.
I only serve it after a shiatsu massage.
50 euros cash.
No refund.
We have a deal?
I got a feeling I don't have a choice.
You know, it's too bad we can't just get on that boat.
You know, I checked, and it's going to Istanbul.
Formerly known as Constantinople.
You know what?
That's nobody's business but the Turks.
It is so gorgeous here.
It looks like we're enjoying the calm after the storm.
Salute!
Only one glass.
I booked us on a 9:00 AM flight to Corfu.
There's only one departure a day, and we cannot miss it.
Are you sure you don't want to stick around Syracuse.
It's beautiful when it's not raining.
Sure, I'd love to stick around.
We both kind of need to get back on that boat, though.
I mean, to be honest, I'm just soaking in the moment.
Can I be really honest?
Sure.
And not a little vulnerable.
Oh.
I have had a really great time getting to know you.
And I know that when we get back on that boat, we're going
back into work, and it's--
but here, it's just you and me.
Huh.
Well, if I didn't know any better,
I'd think you were trying to keep me off that ship.
Hey, can you blame a guy for trying?
I'm not too injured to get back on the boat.
So much for that doctor that you highly recommended and
her failed Mr. Miyagi massage.
I promise you, she came very highly recommended.
I will say this, there was some truth
to her words of wisdom. - Really?
Like what?
Not if it's a one glass only night.
This is a share-the-whole-bottle story at minimum.
Order me some pasta and I could be convinced.
You got a deal.
You were saying?
Oh-- now?
Just that Dr. Valcano, you know, there was some truth
to what she said about love.
I was married for almost 10 years.
Amazing woman.
She was-- she was the love of my life.
Or so I thought.
Five years ago, we were this close
to our 10-year anniversary.
And so I planned this really big trip to Italy.
Here, in fact.
We were going to stay here.
Adam had just bought this property,
and he was raving about it.
So I booked 10 nights and two first-class tickets.
And in the taxi, on the way to the airport,
she had this breakdown out of nowhere
and said she didn't want to go with me.
What happened?
It's just an age-old story.
She loved me, but she wasn't in love with me anymore.
Was there someone else?
I mean, she said no, but she started seeing someone pretty
quickly after the separation.
So I have my doubts.
Parker, I'm so sorry.
It's OK.
It happens.
And I have to take some of the responsibility.
I mean, I was obsessed with work.
I was doing it for us.
You know, I thought I was building towards our future.
But I realize now that I was just chipping
away at our foundation.
That is a hard realization to make.
And now I'm wondering if Dr. Valcano wasn't right
about the other thing, too.
What, that you're running away?
Yeah.
And I'm not afraid of commitment.
Like, I really want a relationship.
I just-- I'm afraid of more pain.
And with that, I'm going to top myself off.
You came back here, didn't you?
What do you mean?
I mean, you had a whole trip planned to celebrate here.
It must have taken a lot of guts to walk through those doors
yesterday and check in.
You're right, I guess.
I guess I have healed more than I thought.
You can't see if the wound has healed
until the bandage comes off.
You know what?
My back is actually healed.
Yeah, that's probably the wine.
Yeah, you're probably right.
All right, your turn.
What was your biggest heartbreak?
As sad as it is, I don't have one.
I don't believe that.
How is that possible?
I mean, I've had relationships.
I just end them before it gets too serious.
I've seen so much heartbreak-- my parents
and then a few of my friends.
I don't know if I want to risk it, calculated or not.
Guess we're both afraid of the pain.
We have that in common.
To us.
Lucky us.
Yeah.
- I overslept. - I know.
So did I!
The airport, it's an hour away!
We're never going to make it!
Well, we have to try.
I'll meet you in the lobby in two minutes.
Can you make it one?
Make it one.
OK, OK.
Parker!
All right.
We got this.
- I don't think so. - Yep.
- It's a long drive. - You did real good.
That was one minute.
Yeah, we got this.
Gotta calla cab.
Hey!
Oh, God.
Buongiorno.
Francesca, can you order us a taxi to Catania airport?
Right away, sir.
Si pronto.
Do you think we have a chance?
Well, the airport's 30 minutes away.
It's all going to depend on security.
But if we can catch a cab--
Yeah!
I think we have a chance!
Wait, wait.
OK.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
My passport!
- What, seriously? - I think I left it in the room.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
We have to get in this cab right now
or we're going to miss this flight.
They're not going to let me on the plane without it.
Parker, I need to get back!
Hey, you gotta go.
All right?
I'll find my own way.
I will meet you in Bari.
What?
Go.
Listen, I put it right in the drawer,
right on top of the Gideon's Bible, so I wouldn't forget it.
And I told myself, put it here so you don't forget it.
And--
You know, for someone as smart as you are,
you certainly are forgetful.
It's the struggles of a beautiful mind, sis.
Struggles of a beautiful mind.
Well, I hope you're having fun at least.
You and Kelly getting close at all?
No! No.
She's on her way back to the cruise,
and I'm stranded here in Syracuse,
and Adam is going to be doubly mad at me.
- Wait, why double? - Like you don't know.
I heard you guys are real buddy, buddy.
You should be thanking me, actually.
Because I'm doing this for you and your precious deal, OK?
Really?
You're not doing it because you want
to hang out with a billionaire bachelor on the high seas?
That is not why, and you know it.
But you know, actually, we're kind of having
fun getting to know each other.
Just be careful, he tends to prioritize business
over his relationships.
What do you mean?
He asked me to purposefully contain
Kelly from getting back onto the ship
so that she couldn't do her job.
OK, that is not OK.
Oh, is this why you forgot your password in your room?
No! No!
That was an honest mistake, I swear,
and I would never do that to her.
Absolutely not.
And this is why Adam's going to be extra mad at you?
Yes, because I'm still here, and she is about to be there.
You know what?
Why don't you just let me deal with Adam.
What are you talking about? What are you going to do?
He has to know this isn't right.
Don't say anything to Adam!
You're not employed by him.
Ipso facto, he can't fire you.
Yeah, exactly.
Hey, listen, I got to go, because I got a dance class
I signed up for with Adam.
I'll let you know how it goes. - Emily!
Emily!
Golly.
I'm going to get fired.
I'm getting get fired.
Careful, you don't want to throw out your back again.
OK, hold on a second. What are you doing here?
Did you miss your plane? - I did not.
I made it with two minutes to spare.
Even had time for the espresso vending machine.
Well, I don't understand.
Why are you here?
I made it to the flight, Parker.
I chose to not get on it.
OK?
I mean, I figure we got into this pickle together.
It's only fair that we get out of it together.
Yeah, but what about your job?
Well, I am trying to follow my own advice.
If he's going to fire me for making an honest mistake,
I'm not meant to be there.
OK.
I mean, that is a very healthy attitude.
It's bold, but it's very healthy.
Yeah, I realized I have the same tendency as you.
I put work before everything else, including
what's right in front of me.
Let's get back on that boat together.
Oh, golly.
You know, if my head wasn't screwed to my neck--
Are you sure this is the best solution?
Because we missed our flight, I believe
it is our only solution.
How do you figure?
The trains are still on strike,
and there is not a single rental car available in all of Sicily.
We get to the mainland, right?
We get a cab, and we hire somebody to drive
us the rest of the way.
You're so cute.
They're too busy because of the strike,
and there is a bunch of union rules,
a bunch of driving regulations.
It's a mess.
Because we're in Godfather country.
OK, you can't reference a movie you haven't seen.
Noted. Got it.
All right, back to your plan.
Yes, I called Valentina to help.
Who is Valentina?
She's the woman that helped me translate at the train station.
She gave me her card.
Parker, you gotta keep up, OK?
Right.
Her cousin owns a fishing boat.
OK.
Didn't we learn our lesson about excursions in Palermo?
OK, stop.
I am going to ban sarcasm until further notice.
Duly noted.
This plan of yours, I am so confused.
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Come here.
We're here, right?
And the boat is docked all the way up here in Bari.
And it leaves at 8:30 PM sharp.
It goes all the way to Dubrovnik.
That is right.
Now, Valentina's cousin really likes
to fish in the Gulf of Taranto.
Apparently the branzino really bite after a big storm.
- Well, that's a fun fact. - Isn't it?
Yeah.
So if we can just find him in all this chaos,
we can catch a ride to the Port of Taranto.
And then from there, we find her other cousin who has arranged
for transportation to Bari.
This woman is amazing and apparently related to everyone.
That's right.
And if all goes according to plan,
we will be back on the boat by nightfall.
Which gives me enough time to prep with Adam
for the merger meeting.
And if I work through the night,
I can still deliver my report to my boss in the morning.
And for the record, I am totally on board with that.
- Good. - OK.
So how do we find cousin number one?
I don't know.
But she said his name is Andrea, he works on the main dock,
and his boat is blue or red.
- Can we use sarcasm yet? - No time.
We gotta find him. - Call him.
Oh, she said he's old school. He doesn't have a phone.
Why doesn't he have a cell phone?
I never really needed one.
I like to be present with the people in my presence.
I'm so glad you found us.
Your cousin, Valentina, said that you could help
us get to the Port of Taranto.
Valentina told you this?
Yes.
Valentina is right.
I may be able to help you.
But only if this strapping young man will help me.
He will do whatever you say.
Come on, you're mopping like a child.
Mop like a man!
Did he just say--
Come on, I want to see your American teeth
sparkling in that window.
Oh, missed a spot.
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, here, I can help with this.
No, sorry, I'm very superstitious.
It's very bad luck for a woman to touch the fishing tackle.
Oh.
Good luck for you, because it's heavy.
With your back.
OK.
Oh, careful.
Bravo.
OK, do little circles.
Si.
I said little circles!
Are you listening to me?
I'm trying to do little circles.
Yes, you're not trying hard enough.
I got this.
Let me do it.
Woo!
Bari, here I come.
Here we come!
Hey grab a hold of that little thing there.
2, 3.
1, 2, 3.
You're pretty quiet there.
Are you focusing on your dance moves,
or is there something on your mind?
A little of both.
Spill it.
I don't think that's something you'd
want your investors to hear.
OK.
Very good.
Keep the feet up.
Nice. Looking good.
I don't like the sound of that.
What's going on?
I don't know.
I mean, maybe something to do with the fact
you asked my brother to stop Kelly
from getting back on the boat.
1, 2, 3.
1, 2--
Hey, she represents the competition.
This is business.
It's not personal.
No, things like this happen.
She shouldn't be punished for them.
I'm not punishing anyone.
OK?
I just find the situation serendipitous.
Yeah.
I think the word you're looking for is surreptitious.
OK, that's a little unfair.
Wouldn't you rather win this deal fair and square?
Let's keep it down, shall we?
Why?
I don't have anything to hide.
Do you?
1, 2, 3.
Look, I wanted to help out because I
feel bad for my brother and because you
seem like a really good guy.
Unless you change the way you're handling the situation,
you're going to find yourself alone in this.
And I don't just mean me.
I mean Parker too.
Do not take his goodness for granted.
Please.
Nice.
I think I'm feeling a little seasick,
so I'm going to go lie down.
Hey, how's your back?
Never been better.
Ah, I guess Dr. Valcano was right after all.
She was.
I'm really glad I let her take a quack at me.
Oh, dad, jokes are back.
I guess you're feeling calm again?
Somehow that is exactly how you make me feel.
Now, can you cure my seasickness?
I wish I had some Dramamine for this drama king out here.
Touche.
I can't even be mad at you for that one.
Hey, Belladonna?
Si.
Your turn to drive.
Oh, is that not bad luck?
Quite the opposite, actually.
You're going to drive?
OK.
So put your hands on the wheel.
Yes.
Yeah.
Just like driving a car.
I'm not feeling so calm now.
Hey
Stop.
Stop the boat!
Kill the engine!
Hey, what's wrong.
Is everything OK?
I almost forgot the most important thing.
The money.
Oh, yes.
Absolutely.
Whatever it costs, we're happy to pay it.
Shouldn't we be paying you?
Throw them in the water.
This is a two-euro coin.
Shouldn't we be using, like, maybe a two-cent coin instead?
If you're generous to the sea, she
will be generous back to you.
Toss them over your shoulder.
3, 2, 1.
Belle.
Today's going to be a lucky one.
Right.
So what does the cousin look like?
I don't know. She didn't say.
She just said that there was going to be transportation
waiting on the dock. - What's his name?
Mario.
Well, that really narrows it down.
Sorry, embargo on the sarcasm.
What about his phone number? You got that on your phone?
Yeah.
My phone is almost dead.
Oh, no, scratch that. It is dead.
It's fine, it's fine. She said he would be here.
OK.
Hey.
Look at this. Look at this.
Vroom.
Hah!
Miss Kelly, I apologize that I could not escort you myself,
but Limoncello will get you there safely.
Leave her at the dock in Bari to the woman at the gelato cart.
Buon viaggio, Mario.
This is not good.
- Why?
Do I look dumb?
I am terrified of motorcycles.
Good thing this is just a glorified scooter.
Parker, you don't understand.
I'm terrified of anything that only has two wheels.
OK, my childhood bike still has the training wheels on it.
Hey, Kelly, I was born to ride this thing.
All you got to do is hold on tight.
You might look dumb.
I look dumber.
Try not to eat any junebugs on the way.
There's a world that I want to show you
So take my hand
Let's find something new
Both feet on the ground
Going to hit it running
Looking everywhere to get what you want
Going to treat you right so--
Should we check out Boardwalk or Park Place?
OK, buddy. You know what?
Just keep driving or I'm going to send you straight to jail.
You got it.
We made it!
With seven minutes to spare.
Oh!
Well, that is cause for celebration.
Si, senor.
Hello.
So Mario said you would know what to do with Limoncello.
Yeah? Si?
And I would love some gelato.
Can I have some pistachio, please?
And the lady would like?
Oh, stracciatella.
Stracciatella, of course.
We did it.
Yeah.
You know what?
Now that we're here, I feel a little sad.
Why?
Well, we had quite the adventure.
Well, just because we're getting back on the boat
doesn't mean the adventure has to stop.
I like the sound of that.
Grazie mille.
All right, salute.
Salute.
And that sound means we got to get back on the boat.
Get on the boat!
Yeah!
Ah, we made it!
Hey!
All right, I am going to go. I have to go get cleaned up.
But I'm going to go find Emily and Adam.
Yes.
Me, too.
Well, no, just the cleaning up part.
I gotta plug my phone in and get to work, you know?
OK.
Um, so you know what I think I'm going to do?
I think at midnight, I'm going to go down
to that 24-hour pizza oven--
if you want to join me.
I'm still going to be up, so--
You might as well swing by for research.
Research, right.
And then, let's--
I'm going to--
- Get out of here. - I'll see you there.
See you there.
All right, bye.
I'll see you there.
Bye.
See you later.
Bye
Oh, Kelly.
Hi.
I'm so glad you guys are back.
Yeah.
In fact, I heard you were quite the hero
and saved the day.
No, no, no.
It was a team effort.
Yeah.
Well, I appreciate it.
And, um, I owe you an apology.
You do?
Yeah, I realize I shouldn't have
asked Parker to purposely stall you
from getting back on the boat.
It was wrong.
It was, uh, selfish and opportunistic,
and frankly unnecessary.
I shouldn't have put you or him in that position, and I--
I'm sorry.
Well, I am so glad you told me.
Oh, me too.
Big load off my chest.
Yeah.
You know, it was Emily.
Emily actually is the one that stood up to me and said--
Adam, you know what? I gotta go.
OK?
But I'm-- I'm sorry.
Good luck on your meeting tomorrow.
OK, see you soon.
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
George, hi.
I'm so sorry I've been out of pocket.
I can explain everything, and I promise
you I will have everything uploaded
to the platform by 6:00 AM.
Save it, Kelly.
There's nothing more to explain.
They threatened to cancel our contract,
so I brought in somebody else.
You're kidding me, right?
I wish I was.
They boarded the ship in Corfu, and their work
has been really solid.
I'm going to have to let you go.
Sorry, this came from the top.
George.
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
Do you mean let me go from this assignment or from my job?
I'm sorry, Kelly, but it's both.
Gotta go.
When can we talk?
Taking a break from work already?
Slacker.
- I - just got fired, Parker.
They brought on somebody else.
I am so sorry.
Meet me at the lido lounge.
Thank you.
Hey, Kelly.
I'm sorry.
What happened?
Don't do that.
You know exactly what happened.
Seriously, I'm in the dark.
You know what you're doing right now,
Parker, is not sarcasm.
It's just straight up dishonesty.
OK, I know you're upset because you lost your job.
I'm upset because you knew I was on a deadline
and you deliberately stalled me.
OK--
Adam told me.
Of course he did.
Your back.
Was that an act or was that real?
No, that was-- that was real. Honest.
Promise. - And the passport?
The forgotten passport?
That was very convenient.
Honest mistake.
Why would I put you in a cab to get you back on the boat
if I was trying to deliberately delay you?
I don't know!
I don't know what to think, Parker.
I just know that I keep--
I keep replaying that dinner that we had together
in Syracuse, you asking me to stay because you're having such
a good time getting to know me.
And I-- I just--
I feel so stupid.
Every word of that was true.
Yes, Adam asked me to delay you.
I didn't listen to him.
You could ask my sister.
I told her about it immediately.
Maybe you should have told me.
You're right.
Good luck on your meeting tomorrow.
I hope it was worth it.
Kelly.
Oh, that is such a cute dress.
Permission to come aboard?
What's the password?
I don't know.
I think it's something like I was wrong for being so
shortsighted about the Kelly situation,
and I'm glad you had the guts to tell me and put me in my place.
Did you make it right?
Well, I told her the truth and apologized.
I haven't seen Parker yet.
But when I do, I plan on doing the same.
Password accepted.
Sweet.
You should have a chance to see Parker soon, because I
told him to meet me here.
Well, I can't wait to hear the adventures.
Yeah.
You know, I am so impressed with how you're
able to be so honest with me.
I'm realizing there aren't a lot of people in my life
that are willing to do that.
Maybe you should rethink who's your life.
There it is again.
It's-- you are just brutally honest, and I love it.
Hey, what did you say to her?
I was just telling Emily that I apologized for my little plan
to have you delay her from getting on the boat.
All right.
And did you fail to mention to her that I
didn't follow through with it?
I didn't know what was happening.
Both of your phones died, so I was kind of left in the dark.
Whatever you said to her got her very upset with me.
More importantly, she got fired for this.
- No. - Yeah.
I am sorry.
I truly am.
I let opportunity get in the way of honor,
and I regret even mentioning it.
Forgive me?
Of course.
All right.
So what do we do now?
I don't know, Parker.
You're the head of operations and strategy.
You tell me.
Some days it's all OK
Then--
--feels like it's far from saving
I stand with fingers crossed and breathe
When it takes all I've got to see
I remember
Whenever it falls down
And there'll be like waves there
Ah, thank you, sir.
Looks amazing.
Thank you.
Care to share a slice?
Hey.
I didn't think I was going to see you again.
Well, you promised pizza.
I did.
Yeah, it's not-- it's not a Margherita pizza.
I'm more of a dirty martini girl anyway.
Was that a pun-based peace offering?
It was.
Except you should have said pizza offering.
Talk about missing the boat.
You know that I was telling the truth, right?
I would never have purposely kept you from getting back.
Yeah, I know.
I thought back to that moment in the cab.
I realized I saw the truth in your eyes.
Plus, you were such a baby about your back.
There was no way you were faking that.
Right?
I know.
It just further proves my case.
I'm sorry you lost your job.
It's OK.
No, really.
It's fine.
I'm the one who chose to not get on that plane.
And I don't regret it.
You know, If they're going to fire
you for making an honest mistake,
you weren't meant to be there.
Those are wise words.
Who said that?
Pretty sure it was me.
Plus, you know, I think it's going to motivate
me to go out on my own.
I think I'd make a pretty decent independent consultant.
I'm pretty sure you would.
Actually, I have some notes on your presentation
if you want me to help you close the deal.
Say no more.
Here.
Where do you want to start?
Spreadsheets or projections?
Pizza.
Hold tight
I can't believe that you rented a medieval museum
for this meeting.
Well, I know how to set a vibe.
So let's just deliver now, huh?
Well, you ready, secret weapon?
On your order, my liege.
Limoncello on three.
1, 2, 3.
Limoncello!
- They don't-- - It's an off-the-boat thing.
You wouldn't understand.
OK. All right.
Ladies and gentlemen, how about we get this party started?
Grab some pastries.
Frank the Tank, I want you to try those croissants.
They're magnificent.
One last thing that I want
to talk to you about, though.
I feel like in today's day and age,
the hardest thing is finding that work-life balance.
We are in a culture that is obsessed with success.
We forget to take time with the people that we love.
Now, if you add Crandall Cruises to your portfolio, what you will
be offering millions of people all around
the world is the chance to rediscover that balance.
Now, there's only one person who can
say it more beautifully than I, and
that's this person right here.
Kelly, please.
The floor is yours.
Thank you.
Hi, everybody.
I'm Kelly Coates.
I was the woman who was hired to do due diligence for your team
and then was subsequently fired for missing the boat.
I get that.
But I want to tell you that in the time
I tried to find everything that was wrong about this company,
I actually found everything that was right about it.
I spent the better part of the week
with the top management at Crandall Cruises,
and I can tell you that this team is full of integrity
and full of honor.
Now, they're not perfect.
All right, they make mistakes.
But when they do, they acknowledge those mistakes,
and they do their best to make it right for the customer.
So if I was looking to acquire a company
with that type of culture, that type of tradition,
I would gladly step aboard.
Thank you for your time.
That was awesome.
Thank you, Kelly.
Guys, this is your time for questions.
If there are no questions, it is time to bring
out the old quill and ink.
You could sign.
I object.
You can't object.
This isn't a courtroom.
Well, then I rescind my offer to sell.
Are you serious?
Yeah, just-- just trust me.
I hope you have all enjoyed your week
here on the Mediterranean courtesy
of this fabulous cruise line.
But after careful consideration, I've
changed my mind about the direction we're sailing here.
You know, being on the water this past week
has reminded me why I got into this business
in the first place, and that's to bring people together.
Greg and Judy know what I'm talking about.
Anyway.
So my partner and I, we are open to investment to expand
our empire on the open sea.
But we will be retaining our controlling
ownership in Crandall Cruises.
No further questions, Your Honor.
Again, this isn't a courtroom.
Are you serious?
Yeah.
So you left a lot of money on the table back there.
Are you having any seller's remorse?
Honestly, no.
I meant everything I said in there.
Plus, I'm far too young to retire anyway.
I'm just glad you realize how good a team you have.
Parker is the best there is, of course.
And I think hiring Kelly is going to really increase
your consumer experience.
Yeah.
Now all I need to do is just hire a new partner
for business relations.
I mean, I know someone looking for a job.
You have yourself a deal.
Oops.
Uh, forgot to let go.
Oopsies.
I'll send a memo to HR when we get back.
You better.
I am officially blown away.
I mean, I've never seen Adam beg anybody that hard to work for.
I mean, you really impressed him.
Well, you're glowing. recommendation
didn't hurt either.
So is it a little awkward that I'm your boss now?
Technically, I'm just a consultant.
So you're not my boss at all.
It's true.
Is it awkward that you have a crush on your consultant?
Technically, it's way more than a crush.
So you really can't call it that at all.
What would you call it?
A calculated risk.