Harshu?
Vidhya's here.
-Beggar! -Mind your language.
Beggar! You are a beggar!
The fan's been switched off.
Without any shouting.
So it can't be mom.
Dabbu, let me sleep, man.
The sun is shining bright and you are still sleeping!
An excited elder brother?
He either wants to get some work done, or...
he wants to blackmail me.
Dabbu.
Aka Manthra, aka Narad.
He's the class-monitor who'd write
your name on the board even if you didn't talk.
Took them out of dad's pants, right?
It's not like I'm an ideal boy
who'd say "Sorry, Shaktiman" and accept his mistake.
But if I don't,
then he'll definitely utter those three words
that have been used to scare every child at some point.
Should I tell mom?
Yes, go ahead.
Dad gave them to me.
Is that so?
All right. Your wish is my command.
Mom?
I was having a look at Harshu's notebooks,
-and guess what I found. -What?
Extremely poor handwriting.
With such bad handwriting,
no matter how many tuitions he takes, he won't get good marks.
Yes, that's true.
Why don't you ask Mr. Verma to give him writing homework as well?
I'll tell him when he comes.
Actually, he shouldn't face the same problems I faced.
You're the elder brother.
It's your duty to guide him.
Even grandpa says
that an elder brother is akin to the father.
He also says that cow piss is healthy. Have a sip!
This country has hyped the position of elder brothers.
My, Hulk Hogan.
I raised it like my own.
If only I could find out a secret of his, and that's it...
Hey.
Fill the empty bottles and put them in the fridge.
And in the evening, you'll get the dried clothes from the terrace.
And of course,
you have to clean the room before Verma arrives.
These elder brothers...
If anyone could have just figured out a way
to handle them in the entire history...
There's Mother's Day for moms,
Father's Day for dads,
and Raksha Bandhan for brothers and sisters.
But no day celebrates brothers.
How can there be one?
Imagine how weird it would be
when a brother would give a card to another
and then kiss him.
Yuck!
Man, you're so lucky. You have no elder brother.
I am the elder brother.
But you're the only child.
My mom and dad are still quite adventurous,
they could always get carried away.
Hey, Shashi Kapoor from Deewar!
Why do you look so sad?
He usurped my Hulk Hogan.
What?
What secret did he find out?
I took money from papa's pants.
He found them.
Where did the money go?
He kept the money, too.
Kept the money as well as the card?
Is he your brother or the police?
When was this fortress put up?
The terrace railing has come off,
they've kept this here as a precaution for Dhwani.
How do you get on the terrace?
Can you even move this thing?
Only Dabbu moves it. Only Dabbu goes out.
With the power of Bournvita!
Come on.
What are the two of you doing here?
We've come for a prayer meeting.
Want to play the drums?
Dabbu, bro.
That sum you clarified for me, we got it in the exams.
It was for six marks. And I'm the only one who got it right.
Was it really in the paper?
Yes. Haven't you seen the paper?
He doesn't show me anything.
You go down.
Why should I?
When your friends are over, you always ask me to go downstairs.
Now, my friend's over. You go down.
He's my friend too.
"Atmosphere!"
Couldn't you have just said it?
You'd have still felt bad, had I picked you.
Why would I have felt bad?
On Teacher's Day, when Dabbu came to teach in class,
and Darpan was imitating him.
Weren't you the one who hit him?
That was different.
Excuse me. It's not that easy to take sides.
Shahrukh or Salman?
Shahrukh.
Go and get water, at least.
I'll just go. Tell me...
DDLJ or Hum Aapke Hain Kaun?
Hum Aapke Hain Kaun.
OK.
Harshu or me?
Yes, answer this!
-Me, right? -I'm cute, right, Mom?
Parents love all their kids equally.
Come on!
Get water, at least.
OK. Dad or us?
Yes. Answer this!
-Dad. -Why?
No one can come between husband and wife.
Not even children.
-Nonsense... -What is this nonsense...
Harshu, get me water!
Ask your husband for it!
Yes.
It is difficult to choose.
Since you keep taking digs at Dabbu,
then who solves your doubts?
I never take his help.
Teaches me for an hour,
and then complains to mom about my lack of knowledge.
What's the point?
Be glad you have someone to teach you at the last minute.
If he wasn't there, I wouldn't have had to study.
I could have enjoyed scoring 66%.
But he scores 95%.
Do you know I study more than Dabbu?
No, really.
Dabbu doesn't work hard, he just scores marks.
He's not what he looks like.
He has layers.
Is he a brother or an onion?
Well said. He's like an onion.
He stinks. But mom and dad think he's sincere.
Elder ones really are sincere.
My foot!
They're useless.
They keep nodding their heads like Monish Behl.
Can't even afford to lead a film.
Hum Aapke Hain Kaun, Ram Lakhan,
Jo Jeeta Wahi Sikandar,
show that younger brothers outshine the elder ones.
They're films, man. Not real life.
In real life, the older brother is the batsman
and the younger brother is the wicket-keeper.
And in India, a wicket-keeper never becomes a captain.
Being the younger one must have some perks, man.
There is. You get lots of things for free.
It used to look better on me.
Mom!
I don't want second-hand stuff, man.
Do you know Dabbu has two kinds of clothes?
For home and for outside.
I also have two kinds of clothes.
Clothes to wear at home and Dabbu's hand-me-downs.
They'll obviously get him new clothes.
First child is always loved more.
Parents love all their kids equally.
I can tell that your mom must have said this to you.
Just as every kid has a favorite parent,
in the same way, every parent has a favorite kid.
Do one thing.
Dabbu blackmails you, right?
You blackmail him too, now.
Tit for tat.
He's not like us, man.
He never does anything wrong.
The marksheet is not the Character Certificate.
If you look honestly, you can find light in the darkest of corners.
And you just need a secret.
If Dabbu came to the terrace for fresh air,
then why'd he bring his bag?
How much more time will it take, sir?
I'm coming, sir.
Let's begin in the name of Lord.
Open the first chapter.
Fool.
What have you done to the book?
The year hasn't even started.
Sir, it's not mine. It's Dabbu's.
It's two years old.
Oh, savings.
Good. It's a good thing.
Did you hear him properly?
Tea. Please explain to him.
He keeps insisting for new books. Says he won't use Dabbu's.
Envy for elder brother?
It's against Indian values.
Never envy your elder brother.
Follow the path that he leads.
Because they always have more brains.
That's not necessary, sir.
It is. It absolutely is.
Ram-Laxman. Raavana-Kumbhkaran. Yudhishtir-Bheem.
My younger brother and I.
Balram and Krishna?
Fool!
They weren't real brothers.
Always listen to your elder brother.
Never ever defy him.
Do as he does.
Dabbu?
Dabbu, the exam results are out!
There are moments when you find out something new...
But then you feel that you were better off if you hadn't found it out.
No, but you promised me that Sunday...
Didn't get enough sleep?
Have you been studying?
Yes.
There's still lots to study.
Mom, give me some tea, as well.
Chitti?
Come here.
Or even you'll start drinking tea.
So tell me then, what happened?
There was a book.
A book?
Which subject?
Not that kind of a book, man.
There were strange photos inside it.
Must have been an Atlas?
Dirty photos of girls.
Without any clothes.
Dabbu turned out to be a smarty-pants!
Sitar on the outside, a guitar on the inside.
All toppers are the same!
And yes, you don't call them books.
They're called magazines. Adult magazines.
Dude, where do the magazine guys get such photos of women from?
Girls get them clicked.
Don't they feel weird?
What's weird in it?
What if their mom's find out?
That's America.
Moms over there don't inculcate values, they inculcate common sense.
But those girls looked Indian to me.
They were Indian?
Must have been Debonair.
Yes, it said something like that.
You read all this?
No, man.
I look at them.
Do you want to see them?
No.
Have a look, you'll feel good.
Shanky, don't talk nonsense.
OK. Don't see them.
Keep reading, Champak.
No respect for literature.
People like you know of Michelangelo but not about his work.
As you wish.
Appreciation for art comes with age.
But, Mr. Gupta, the path is clear now.
Go ahead and blackmail Dabbu.
Acts like a smarty, that bugger.
Yes.
I'll get my Hulk Hogan back.
Only Hulk Hogan?
Along with Undertaker,
Kamala, Hitman...
And Yokozuna.
Yes! This is the time to be Deewar's Shashi Kapoor.AA
Brother!
Today I've come to destroy your citadel of crime.
Shut that nonsense. Let me study.
These days you have been reading a lot,
and that too things from outside of the syllabus.
Wow!
Quit the drama. What do you want?
Hulk Hogan.
Kamala.
Undertaker.
And all those trump cards that you've amassed by exploiting the underprivileged.
Have you had Dad's whisky?
Some people are taken by alcohol, while others are taken by youth.
That's the correct word, right?
Taken by youth.
Are you leaving or should I call mom?
Don't say that woman's name with your filthy mouth!
-In front of her, you-- -Dabbu, Harshu?
Dabbu, Harshu?
Dhwani, you go out.
Where did this magazine come from?
Is this why you get pocket money?
Who brought it?
This...
Look.
Whoever brought it, tell us.
Nothing will happen.
Who brought it?
You brought it, right?
Poorva?
You brought it, right?
Yes.
I made a mistake.
Mistake!
And when I ask you to study, you can't bear it.
And then you say you made a mistake!
-And do this! -I'm sorry, Mom.
Mom, leave him. He won't do it again.
Here comes "the sibling protector".
Since I don't raise my hands on you, you pick up such habits.
These kids of ours are a disgrace! No more going out from today.
Haven't lost your milk teeth yet and acting all grown up!
I've been noticing your behavior lately!
Sleep here tonight!
Nobody will stay up late.
There's no need to study for the entrance test.
I pay so much attention to them.
Yet I don't know where I'm going wrong.
You're worrying too much.
Too much?
Have you looked inside the magazine?
Why would I look at it?
I'm just saying boys at this age, do these things.
Thank you for telling me
that they are "boys" and that they do "these things".
But we'll have to control them.
He already makes plans to go for films.
That's why he takes so long in the bathroom these days.
And if I don't strike him, hey'll pick up more such habits.
He, anyway, doesn't study.
This is the age at which they pick up bad habits.
This is what I was saying the other day.
You've always been saying it,
and I'm the one who doesn't pay attention, right?
Yes.
That's the problem.
You don't pay attention.
No more drinking alcohol in the house!
For the first time I don't feeling bad after a beating.
Come and eat your food.
Dhwani. Come and sit here.
Harshu got beaten today. That's why he's eating less.
Did you also have a look at that magazine?
No!
Don't.
Then why do you look at them?
Why didn't you say that the magazine wasn't yours?
Nobody should come between brothers.
Not even parents.
Sorry.
Now, had mom beaten Dabbu,
the environment in whole house would have gotten weird.
I'm cool.
If mom sees Dabbu as a sitar,
so be it.
Dabbu, wait.
Mom, I wanted to talk to you.
Tell me?
You won't tell Harshu about this, right?
I'm not going to promise. I'll hear you out and decide.
I think Harshu's getting out of control.
What's new about that?
No, I do think you are partially responsible for it.
How?
Now, he's around Shanky because you asked him to be.
So, Shanky's a good boy.
That's the mistake.
The marksheet isn't the Character Certificate.
He's very spoilt.
His mom doesn't pay as much attention as you do.
Poor kid.
And Harshu is at an impressionable age.
What difference does he know between right and wrong?
We need to make sure that he's around good company. Right?
Yes.
Do you remember Vidhya? The one that came for his birthday.
Which one?
The one who was appreciating the food.
Yes, she seemed like a wise girl.
Yes. Tell Harshu to be around her from now on.
She goes to Mr. Verma for tuitions, and then he comes here to teach.
Why don't you ask her to come home to study?
She'll save time and Harshu will also have a good partner.
For his tuitions.
She takes tuitions for Hindi?
Who takes tuitions for Hindi?
Poor in Hindi.
So, should we talk to her?
Come, let's go.
I'm Harshal Gupta's mother.
Vidhya takes tuitions from Mr. Verma, right?
Elder brothers are like onions.
If you have him by your side, he will protect you from anything.
We live in Shastri Nagar.
She had come for Harshal's birthday. That's right.
No, don't worry, Harshal's dad will drop her.
Brother!
Brother.
Take all the cards.
The throne is yours.
The whole kingdom is yours!
Are you done?
Pick up the cards and go, pour water in the cooler.