1 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:05,960 This is Michael Bluth. 2 00:00:06,044 --> 00:00:08,337 Right now he's being honoured by his family. 3 00:00:08,462 --> 00:00:12,006 Three years ago I made a choice to keep this family together. 4 00:00:12,132 --> 00:00:13,675 Today it looks like I succeeded. 5 00:00:13,801 --> 00:00:15,927 So why is this man crying? 6 00:00:16,426 --> 00:00:21,264 Because now he'll have to stay with these people for a long, long time. 7 00:00:22,057 --> 00:00:25,059 Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything, 8 00:00:25,142 --> 00:00:27,354 and the one son who had no choice 9 00:00:27,478 --> 00:00:29,437 but to keep them all together. 10 00:00:34,484 --> 00:00:36,361 It's Arrested Development. 11 00:00:39,197 --> 00:00:43,115 Days earlier, Michael awoke to find his son in his bed. 12 00:00:43,241 --> 00:00:46,661 - Hey, are you scared of a monster? - Kind of. 13 00:00:46,786 --> 00:00:50,914 It was the monster called lust. To which he'd recently succumbed. 14 00:00:50,997 --> 00:00:54,167 And there's a chance you might not even be related to us. 15 00:00:54,251 --> 00:00:57,003 And although he'd only gotten to second base, 16 00:00:57,087 --> 00:00:58,880 he'd gone in headfirst. 17 00:00:59,589 --> 00:01:01,048 Like Pete Rose. 18 00:01:01,173 --> 00:01:03,218 Then they both got some distressing news. 19 00:01:03,301 --> 00:01:05,970 And there you are, Maeby, coming out of your mother's third base. 20 00:01:06,053 --> 00:01:07,428 You guys really are related. 21 00:01:07,512 --> 00:01:08,556 And, that night... 22 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:10,139 You're not sleeping in here now. 23 00:01:10,223 --> 00:01:11,349 Yeah, you think that's a bad idea? 24 00:01:11,474 --> 00:01:13,017 What, I mean so we could make out every night? 25 00:01:13,101 --> 00:01:15,394 Does that not work for your schedule? 26 00:01:15,561 --> 00:01:18,729 I mean, I'm sure we can control our, you know... 27 00:01:19,188 --> 00:01:21,692 - I'm gonna go sleep with my dad. - Yeah, I'm gonna go get my job back. 28 00:01:21,817 --> 00:01:23,525 You're probably just a little anxious because 29 00:01:23,608 --> 00:01:27,821 your old man is about to start running a successful company for a change. 30 00:01:27,946 --> 00:01:31,699 - So, Pop-pop is definitely innocent, huh? - No, not by a long shot. 31 00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:34,577 But they have dropped all the charges, and not just the Iraq ones. 32 00:01:34,702 --> 00:01:37,203 The embezzlement, the pension robbing. 33 00:01:37,328 --> 00:01:39,290 I don't know why they dropped them, but they did. 34 00:01:39,415 --> 00:01:41,873 Let's see if we are on Mad Money, huh? 35 00:01:41,999 --> 00:01:44,459 And they deliver insulin right to my door. 36 00:01:44,584 --> 00:01:47,588 It's probably on right after this ad. This is gonna be great for us, though. 37 00:01:47,672 --> 00:01:50,090 It's gonna give us a chance to spend some time together, you know? 38 00:01:50,215 --> 00:01:52,676 It's like, I don't even know what's going on in your life right now. 39 00:01:52,801 --> 00:01:54,677 Are there any girls, or... 40 00:01:55,093 --> 00:01:58,596 Actually, I've been wrestling with some pretty taboo... 41 00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:00,057 - Here it is. - I love these guys! 42 00:02:00,182 --> 00:02:03,601 They beat the treason charges! We had it as a "don't buy". 43 00:02:03,727 --> 00:02:06,895 - Let's bump it up to a "risky"! - Risky! 44 00:02:06,979 --> 00:02:09,023 There it is. We're doing it, huh? 45 00:02:09,106 --> 00:02:10,900 - Are you happy? - I'm really happy. 46 00:02:11,026 --> 00:02:13,402 I wonder if we should move out of town. 47 00:02:13,901 --> 00:02:14,902 What? 48 00:02:15,029 --> 00:02:17,864 I feel like we've heard this whole "out of the woods" thing a lot, you know? 49 00:02:17,989 --> 00:02:19,032 And I just wouldn't mind... 50 00:02:19,156 --> 00:02:21,117 What have I always said is the most important thing? 51 00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:22,701 Family. 52 00:02:22,826 --> 00:02:25,828 I was gonna say breakfast, but, why don't we go over to Gangy's. 53 00:02:25,911 --> 00:02:29,707 Have a little of both. Later we can talk all this out, huh? 54 00:02:30,415 --> 00:02:33,169 Well, I've heard that a couple times, too. 55 00:02:33,377 --> 00:02:36,629 And so the family gathered for a celebratory brunch 56 00:02:36,755 --> 00:02:38,631 catered by a local restaurant. 57 00:02:38,715 --> 00:02:43,426 - Hello. - Risky! Risky! Risky! Risky! Risky! 58 00:02:44,052 --> 00:02:46,638 Look at that, Buster. You would've lost a hand anyway. 59 00:02:46,764 --> 00:02:49,014 I'd like to make an announcement. 60 00:02:49,139 --> 00:02:52,226 We need to finish the party we started three years ago. 61 00:02:52,310 --> 00:02:55,728 Finally name Michael CEO of a thriving company! 62 00:02:56,395 --> 00:02:57,773 Huzzah! 63 00:02:58,565 --> 00:03:02,233 We'll prove to the world that nothing can tear apart the Bluth family. 64 00:03:02,358 --> 00:03:04,404 In fact, I've already rented the same boat. 65 00:03:04,529 --> 00:03:07,198 I'm not comfortable near the ocean since the seal attack. 66 00:03:07,322 --> 00:03:08,949 The ocean is my second biggest fear. 67 00:03:09,074 --> 00:03:12,327 Good. Don't come. I need to be rubbing elbows, not working your fork. 68 00:03:12,410 --> 00:03:16,038 - We'll find a new venue. - And before I forget, no magic, Gob. 69 00:03:17,874 --> 00:03:19,499 - Where is Gob? - Who knows? 70 00:03:19,582 --> 00:03:21,876 - I don't even know where he lives. - He doesn't live at Michael's? 71 00:03:22,001 --> 00:03:23,794 I've always pictured him in a lighthouse. 72 00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:27,340 Doesn't matter. Mom, I'm just really flattered that you're willing to do this. 73 00:03:27,423 --> 00:03:31,051 And I was half worried that you'd all be eager to sell your shares and cash out. 74 00:03:31,176 --> 00:03:32,635 We can do that? 75 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:36,680 Yeah. But Stan Sitwell's always had a wild hair to buy this business. 76 00:03:36,805 --> 00:03:39,391 It's the only hair he's got. What? 77 00:03:39,517 --> 00:03:40,683 He's an alpaca. 78 00:03:40,810 --> 00:03:43,645 He has alopecia. And, Lindsay, you know, if we did sell, 79 00:03:43,728 --> 00:03:46,147 it would only mean like, what, $2 million each? 80 00:03:46,272 --> 00:03:48,941 $2 million! $2 million! $2 million! 81 00:03:49,024 --> 00:03:50,983 You know, that sounds like a lot more than it actually is. 82 00:03:51,109 --> 00:03:53,111 You know, you've already spent $1,200 on eggs. 83 00:03:53,237 --> 00:03:55,196 And that would be it forever. Keep in mind, 84 00:03:55,279 --> 00:03:57,616 we are building something that is not only for our kids, 85 00:03:57,741 --> 00:04:00,826 it's also for George Michael and Maeby's kids, too. 86 00:04:00,951 --> 00:04:02,827 We can't have kids. What's the matter... What are you... 87 00:04:02,952 --> 00:04:04,079 I mean, it's not even an option really. 88 00:04:04,204 --> 00:04:05,288 Well, eventually you'll want to. 89 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:07,957 Sure I may want to, you know, now. It doesn't matter. 90 00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:10,125 It's... Either way, I won't do anything about it. 91 00:04:10,209 --> 00:04:11,419 - Come on! - Michael's right. 92 00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:13,796 And I for one will not go back to wondering 93 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:17,005 whether there's going to be enough food on the table. 94 00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:18,633 Might wanna start worrying about the table. 95 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:20,260 It's fine for you to say don't sell, 96 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,928 but I'm gonna be 40 in three years, you know? 97 00:04:23,053 --> 00:04:26,055 You know, being twins, our birthdays are pretty close to one another. 98 00:04:26,180 --> 00:04:29,016 Yeah, but a 40-year-old woman has as much chance of getting married 99 00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:31,685 as she does of getting attacked by a shark. 100 00:04:31,811 --> 00:04:34,313 I'm sorry. I thought you were gonna say seal. 101 00:04:34,438 --> 00:04:35,980 - Or seal. - God! 102 00:04:36,063 --> 00:04:37,274 Lindsay, you have nothing to worry about. 103 00:04:37,399 --> 00:04:39,442 You're a beautiful woman. Any man would be lucky to have you. 104 00:04:39,568 --> 00:04:42,819 Michael had given this speech many times to Lindsay. 105 00:04:42,944 --> 00:04:44,904 I'm a giant, fat pig. 106 00:04:45,029 --> 00:04:47,365 I don't know why you say stuff like that. 107 00:04:47,490 --> 00:04:50,493 - Girls just grow faster than boys. - Dinner's ready. 108 00:04:50,577 --> 00:04:52,912 We're having Lindsay chops. 109 00:04:53,496 --> 00:04:56,163 What? I wanted her to be prepared in case some bully at school 110 00:04:56,289 --> 00:04:58,000 is as clever as I am. 111 00:04:58,083 --> 00:04:59,543 No bully ever would be. 112 00:04:59,668 --> 00:05:01,544 Let's not forget, you're already married. 113 00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:03,211 - Hey, Mikey. - Yes. 114 00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:04,965 Think I'm gonna cash out myself. 115 00:05:05,088 --> 00:05:07,133 And maybe go down to my little place in Cabo. 116 00:05:07,216 --> 00:05:09,009 What little place in Cabo, Dad? 117 00:05:09,092 --> 00:05:11,553 Did you build yourself a little hideout in case you needed to escape? 118 00:05:11,678 --> 00:05:12,929 Of course not. 119 00:05:13,387 --> 00:05:15,014 Well, I don't want you to worry, Dad. 120 00:05:15,138 --> 00:05:18,058 There's gonna be plenty of money to be made from a business run honestly. 121 00:05:18,184 --> 00:05:20,602 Well your mom's not gonna allow for that. 122 00:05:20,728 --> 00:05:22,687 She'll do whatever it takes to get her way. 123 00:05:22,813 --> 00:05:26,565 - You think the banana stand was our idea? - It wasn't? 124 00:05:26,690 --> 00:05:29,608 It wasn't. Although they marketed the idea better. 125 00:05:29,734 --> 00:05:33,446 The frozen banana itself was the brainchild of a Korean immigrant 126 00:05:33,571 --> 00:05:35,032 who threatened to sue them. 127 00:05:35,114 --> 00:05:36,573 Your mother said she'd take care of it. 128 00:05:36,656 --> 00:05:38,867 The guy was deported to Korea the next day. 129 00:05:38,950 --> 00:05:40,661 Where his business never recovered. 130 00:05:40,785 --> 00:05:44,289 You trying to tell me that all your crimes, all your dishonesty, 131 00:05:44,372 --> 00:05:46,750 - she was behind it all? - She's the queen, Michael. 132 00:05:46,875 --> 00:05:49,168 I was her king. And now it's you. 133 00:05:49,293 --> 00:05:51,461 She may appear all sweetness and light, 134 00:05:51,586 --> 00:05:54,255 but she has a way of controlling your behaviour. 135 00:05:54,338 --> 00:05:56,923 And I'm concerned about you, because I do not want to see you... 136 00:05:57,049 --> 00:05:59,384 - He'll be fine. - You'll be fine. 137 00:06:04,430 --> 00:06:08,641 Michael went to cancel the reservation on the party boat Buster so feared. 138 00:06:08,725 --> 00:06:09,768 Gob! 139 00:06:09,893 --> 00:06:11,895 When he saw Gob on a party boat of his own. 140 00:06:12,020 --> 00:06:14,148 You might wanna untie these ropes first! 141 00:06:14,231 --> 00:06:16,483 - Don't tell me how to flee, Michael! - What're you doing here? 142 00:06:16,608 --> 00:06:18,485 Well, I kind of live here. 143 00:06:18,568 --> 00:06:20,611 Lighthouse wasn't far off. 144 00:06:20,736 --> 00:06:22,612 Perhaps you can tell me how you can afford a boat? 145 00:06:22,695 --> 00:06:25,074 You mean on the paltry $1,500 a week you give me? 146 00:06:25,199 --> 00:06:26,407 I give you $500 a week. 147 00:06:26,532 --> 00:06:28,951 Yeah, well, somebody's drawing a little one on those cheques. 148 00:06:29,077 --> 00:06:32,997 No big deal, I plan on using my Bluth company stock to pay for it. 149 00:06:33,122 --> 00:06:35,332 Sitwell's made me a pretty nice little offer. 150 00:06:35,457 --> 00:06:38,001 - About that, Gob, you cannot sell now. - I have to. 151 00:06:38,126 --> 00:06:40,879 Gob, you're gonna burn through this money and have nothing. All right? 152 00:06:41,004 --> 00:06:42,797 You give a man a fish, he'll eat for a night. 153 00:06:42,922 --> 00:06:45,673 - lf you teach a man to fish... - He'll wanna use your yacht! 154 00:06:45,757 --> 00:06:47,134 And I don't want this thing smelling like fish. 155 00:06:47,218 --> 00:06:48,510 I'm burning through my future for it. 156 00:06:48,636 --> 00:06:50,970 But you wouldn't understand that, because you're a robot. 157 00:06:51,095 --> 00:06:55,140 Although I don't suppose you'd be willing to have the company buy it? 158 00:06:56,225 --> 00:06:58,351 Well, you can't let Gob sell those shares. 159 00:06:58,476 --> 00:06:59,728 Well, what am I supposed to do? 160 00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:01,562 - He won't give up the yacht. - Keep your weight off it. 161 00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:04,942 - So lease it to him through the company. - Yeah, that just doesn't feel right. 162 00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:08,027 Really? How would it feel to lose the company 163 00:07:08,151 --> 00:07:11,570 to a man who has less hair on his... than I have on my... 164 00:07:11,695 --> 00:07:13,864 Well, it can't be worse than hearing that just was. 165 00:07:13,989 --> 00:07:16,491 I guess I couldn't see through the glasses and I slid into the ladder. 166 00:07:16,616 --> 00:07:17,910 Give Gob the boat. 167 00:07:18,035 --> 00:07:21,746 We need to show the shareholders at this party that the family is united. 168 00:07:21,871 --> 00:07:25,374 It's a very small concession to an important cause. 169 00:07:25,959 --> 00:07:28,502 And so Michael sold out, just a little. 170 00:07:28,669 --> 00:07:30,629 Fine, I will give him the yacht. 171 00:07:32,797 --> 00:07:34,507 - Hey, Dad. - Hey, pal. 172 00:07:34,632 --> 00:07:36,259 Well, you said we, we could talk later. 173 00:07:36,384 --> 00:07:38,343 Yeah, you excited about the party? 174 00:07:38,468 --> 00:07:40,512 I actually might even just skip that. 175 00:07:40,637 --> 00:07:44,139 What're you talking about? This party is essential for the stockholders to see. 176 00:07:44,266 --> 00:07:46,934 I mean, we gotta show them how close this family really is. 177 00:07:47,059 --> 00:07:50,478 This was as good an opening as George Michael was going to get. 178 00:07:50,562 --> 00:07:52,355 Maeby and I made out. 179 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:53,941 - Sorry? - Me, too. 180 00:07:54,566 --> 00:07:56,984 What do you mean, Son? You kissed? 181 00:07:57,109 --> 00:07:59,068 Even a little more than that. 182 00:07:59,653 --> 00:08:01,697 I thought she wasn't my real cousin. 183 00:08:01,822 --> 00:08:04,573 But then Uncle Tobias showed us these really rough pictures 184 00:08:04,698 --> 00:08:07,034 that proved that she was really Aunt Lindsay's daughter. 185 00:08:07,159 --> 00:08:10,787 I just feel like I can't be around her, or Aunt Lindsay. 186 00:08:10,996 --> 00:08:13,373 They were really rough pictures. 187 00:08:13,498 --> 00:08:15,833 No, I remember their birth announcement like it was yesterday. 188 00:08:18,043 --> 00:08:19,921 I mean, I know it's wrong, you know. 189 00:08:20,005 --> 00:08:23,088 But, I... My feelings are real, even if it was a mistake. 190 00:08:23,171 --> 00:08:26,884 Well, obviously, acting on those feelings is not an option. 191 00:08:27,010 --> 00:08:29,012 She's a blood relative. 192 00:08:29,136 --> 00:08:30,304 I know. 193 00:08:30,888 --> 00:08:33,974 - I've seen the blood. - Now, how long's this been going on? 194 00:08:34,099 --> 00:08:36,226 I don't know. Fifty-three weeks. 195 00:08:36,351 --> 00:08:38,687 I can't be around her with these feelings any more. 196 00:08:38,812 --> 00:08:41,147 And that's why I'm not going to this party. 197 00:08:41,272 --> 00:08:45,734 And so Michael made another compromise of his values for the sake of the business. 198 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,945 What ever happened to that Ann we were both so crazy about? 199 00:08:49,070 --> 00:08:51,614 You know, maybe you could bring her to the party. 200 00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:54,576 Yeah. Ann is the girl for us. 201 00:08:55,284 --> 00:08:58,870 Michael's sister, meanwhile, was doing some selling out of her own. 202 00:08:58,995 --> 00:09:00,621 I'm not gonna sell my 5%. 203 00:09:00,705 --> 00:09:05,375 Even though you haven't made an offer. Which would be how much, by the way? 204 00:09:05,501 --> 00:09:09,170 5%? Lucille actually gave you less than her natural children. 205 00:09:09,295 --> 00:09:13,133 I hope that's not a crack about my hair colour, lips, forehead, nose and teeth. 206 00:09:13,258 --> 00:09:16,343 Because, at least, I'm not wearing a rayon sweater set on my face. 207 00:09:16,468 --> 00:09:19,888 It's alpaca, actually. Cruelty-free really narrows your choices. 208 00:09:19,971 --> 00:09:23,599 But that's not what I meant when I said "natural child". 209 00:09:23,975 --> 00:09:27,062 Wait a minute. You're saying I'm adopted? 210 00:09:27,145 --> 00:09:28,771 I'm sorry. I thought you knew. 211 00:09:28,896 --> 00:09:30,772 - Have I upset you? - Are you kidding me? 212 00:09:30,898 --> 00:09:33,649 This is the happiest I've been since the day I got my new nose! 213 00:09:33,733 --> 00:09:36,402 - I'm not a Bluth! - You were almost a Sitwell. 214 00:09:36,527 --> 00:09:39,863 But 37 years ago the Bluths adopted you out from under us. 215 00:09:39,988 --> 00:09:43,241 So we said goodbye to you, our darling little 3-year-old. 216 00:09:43,324 --> 00:09:46,951 Wait. 3-year-old? You said it was 37 years ago. 217 00:09:47,077 --> 00:09:48,163 Oh, yeah. Right. 218 00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:50,580 Hey, we should do something for your 40th next week. 219 00:09:50,705 --> 00:09:53,792 This part of the news Lindsay didn't take that well. 220 00:09:54,167 --> 00:09:55,251 Let me... 221 00:09:57,044 --> 00:09:58,253 Get your... 222 00:09:58,378 --> 00:10:00,714 Be gentle! She's almost 40! 223 00:10:00,964 --> 00:10:03,966 Maeby, meanwhile, had returned to Tantamount Studios, 224 00:10:04,050 --> 00:10:07,054 where the word was she was to be replaced 225 00:10:07,179 --> 00:10:10,514 when it was discovered she was not the age she claimed to be. 226 00:10:10,597 --> 00:10:12,307 - Please don't fire me. - Fire you? 227 00:10:12,433 --> 00:10:16,227 Are you kidding? I've already gotten 10 requests for the TV rights to your story. 228 00:10:16,352 --> 00:10:19,104 You gotta get your family to sign the release papers. 229 00:10:19,188 --> 00:10:22,816 This is the biggest thing to happen since Uni-Prod hired that wee-brain 230 00:10:22,941 --> 00:10:24,485 to run drama development. 231 00:10:27,362 --> 00:10:31,573 Michael had compromised his morals and was having trouble sleeping. 232 00:10:31,657 --> 00:10:34,243 Of course, some of that was Lindsay. 233 00:10:35,326 --> 00:10:37,286 - Are you drunk? - A little. 234 00:10:37,411 --> 00:10:39,122 - We need to talk. - Yeah, I'll say. 235 00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:42,374 Are you aware that your daughter and my son have been getting physical? 236 00:10:42,499 --> 00:10:44,376 I mean, can you imagine anything more inappropriate? 237 00:10:44,793 --> 00:10:46,795 I guess you can. What're you doing? 238 00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:48,046 I'm not your sister. 239 00:10:48,171 --> 00:10:49,172 - What? - I'm adopted! 240 00:10:49,297 --> 00:10:50,589 - Wait, Lindsay! - And I'm three years older. 241 00:10:50,714 --> 00:10:53,258 - There must be some mistake. - No. Mom confirmed it. 242 00:10:53,383 --> 00:10:55,262 And I know you've always found me attractive. 243 00:10:55,345 --> 00:10:58,179 You've been telling me that for the last 40 years. 244 00:10:58,262 --> 00:11:00,306 Wait, Lindsay. This is crazy. 245 00:11:00,390 --> 00:11:02,559 If I don't get divorced and remarried in the next month, 246 00:11:02,684 --> 00:11:04,893 I'm gonna sell those shares and I'm gonna cash out. 247 00:11:05,018 --> 00:11:06,145 So, what do you say? 248 00:11:06,269 --> 00:11:08,773 But even Michael couldn't sell out that much. 249 00:11:08,897 --> 00:11:11,232 I'm just not that into older women. 250 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:15,570 You bastard! 251 00:11:18,905 --> 00:11:22,075 Michael had just found out his sister was adopted. 252 00:11:22,158 --> 00:11:24,993 And the next morning he awoke to a worse surprise. 253 00:11:25,119 --> 00:11:26,120 Come on. 254 00:11:26,245 --> 00:11:28,746 Well, I can't sleep in the same room as her. 255 00:11:28,871 --> 00:11:31,082 She wants out of this marriage, fine. 256 00:11:31,165 --> 00:11:34,752 I'm afraid I'm gonna have to sell the Bluth shares and move on. 257 00:11:34,836 --> 00:11:37,588 - You can't do that. - They're my shares. 258 00:11:37,713 --> 00:11:40,632 No, I mean, you can't spoon me like that. 259 00:11:42,883 --> 00:11:47,095 We need a new venue for the shareholders party and it cannot be a boat. 260 00:11:47,178 --> 00:11:50,182 Now, if you can find something, 261 00:11:50,308 --> 00:11:52,976 maybe I can fudge the books, get you a Bluth company salary, huh? 262 00:11:53,101 --> 00:11:55,186 Maybe call you an events coordinator. 263 00:11:55,312 --> 00:11:57,563 Can we just lay here for a second while I think about it? 264 00:11:57,688 --> 00:12:00,857 Michael was making compromises all over the place. 265 00:12:00,982 --> 00:12:01,985 Sure. 266 00:12:04,694 --> 00:12:06,654 - I'll do it. - Sounds great. 267 00:12:07,363 --> 00:12:10,698 Soon, George Michael went to Ann's to try to win her back. 268 00:12:10,823 --> 00:12:14,745 But her Uncle Paul told him that Ann had moved in with her boyfriend. 269 00:12:14,870 --> 00:12:18,289 He also mentioned that we all only had three more weeks on Earth 270 00:12:18,372 --> 00:12:22,417 and that fossils were just something the Jews buried in 1924. 271 00:12:22,543 --> 00:12:24,836 And so, feeling that he couldn't go home, 272 00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:28,631 George Michael decided to seek out his own creepy uncle. 273 00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:31,717 And Michael confronted his mother about the adoption. 274 00:12:31,801 --> 00:12:35,054 Look, she was better off with us. He wanted to call her Nellie. 275 00:12:35,137 --> 00:12:37,680 Of course. Lindsay is the Nellie from the photo. 276 00:12:37,805 --> 00:12:39,973 Why didn't you just tell people that she was adopted? 277 00:12:40,098 --> 00:12:43,351 Adopting a child we didn't want just to stick it to a competitor. 278 00:12:43,477 --> 00:12:44,853 That'd make us look great. 279 00:12:44,936 --> 00:12:48,023 You're right, Mom. People would've twisted that story to make you look bad. 280 00:12:48,148 --> 00:12:50,358 I don't see what the big deal is. 281 00:12:50,484 --> 00:12:53,485 We loved her just as much as any of you normal kids. 282 00:12:53,568 --> 00:12:54,861 More than Gob! 283 00:12:54,987 --> 00:12:57,822 The big deal, Mom, is that the family is falling apart. 284 00:12:57,947 --> 00:12:59,114 They're trying to sell their stock, 285 00:12:59,239 --> 00:13:03,285 and I can't promise you that I can keep everyone together until the party. 286 00:13:03,410 --> 00:13:04,870 We'll pay them off. 287 00:13:04,953 --> 00:13:07,622 We'll call it an accrued cash dividend. 288 00:13:07,747 --> 00:13:09,625 But they won't get their money 289 00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:14,129 until they sign a document at the party promising not to sell for 10 years. 290 00:13:14,213 --> 00:13:16,339 So it's embezzlement, bribery and conspiracy? 291 00:13:16,464 --> 00:13:18,799 And a whole lot of love. 292 00:13:19,216 --> 00:13:20,926 Oh, right, and perjury. 293 00:13:22,219 --> 00:13:23,511 Michael. 294 00:13:24,636 --> 00:13:28,224 I booked the perfect location and some wonderful performers for the party. 295 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,849 We're having it at the Queen Mary. 296 00:13:31,016 --> 00:13:33,020 Queen Mary? That's a ship. 297 00:13:33,811 --> 00:13:35,855 No, it's a chain of popular nightclubs. 298 00:13:35,980 --> 00:13:38,022 Although, I haven't been to this particular location. 299 00:13:38,147 --> 00:13:40,984 - It's on the Long Beach harbour. - That's the ship. 300 00:13:41,068 --> 00:13:43,568 Buster, don't worry about it. They've actually welded it to the dock. 301 00:13:43,694 --> 00:13:45,655 Although, perhaps I should call the Hot Cops 302 00:13:45,780 --> 00:13:49,283 and tell them to come up with something more nautically themed. 303 00:13:49,367 --> 00:13:51,493 Hot sailors! Better yet, 304 00:13:52,201 --> 00:13:55,120 - hot... - I like hot sailors. 305 00:13:55,871 --> 00:13:56,914 Me, too. 306 00:13:57,164 --> 00:14:00,875 And George Michael was about to come across a hot seaman of his own. 307 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,878 - Gob. - What're you doing here? 308 00:14:02,962 --> 00:14:04,003 How'd you find me? 309 00:14:04,128 --> 00:14:08,091 My dad said that you were living down here with your girlfriend. 310 00:14:08,215 --> 00:14:10,009 - You know about her? - Who? 311 00:14:10,093 --> 00:14:11,133 Ann. 312 00:14:14,303 --> 00:14:15,347 Her? 313 00:14:15,472 --> 00:14:18,890 Gob had been dating Ann since he awarded her third place 314 00:14:19,015 --> 00:14:20,475 in an inner-beauty pageant. 315 00:14:20,601 --> 00:14:25,062 Since then, Ann and her friends tried to teach Gob about the Holy Trinity... 316 00:14:26,106 --> 00:14:27,899 What? I thought that's what all you guys lived for. 317 00:14:28,024 --> 00:14:30,526 ... while Gob debased everything they believed in. 318 00:14:30,651 --> 00:14:32,193 What about you? You game? 319 00:14:32,318 --> 00:14:34,029 It's really not that big of a deal, George Michael. 320 00:14:34,154 --> 00:14:36,990 I'm 18 now, and besides, we really haven't even done anything. 321 00:14:37,115 --> 00:14:38,657 Practically nothing. 322 00:14:39,368 --> 00:14:42,203 But what are you gonna do? The girl obviously needs a man. 323 00:14:42,328 --> 00:14:45,247 And that's when George Michael became one. 324 00:14:45,746 --> 00:14:47,124 Ann was upset. 325 00:14:49,500 --> 00:14:53,338 As was Buster when he saw the ship where the party was to be held. 326 00:14:56,715 --> 00:14:59,466 And so Michael accepted his congratulations, 327 00:14:59,592 --> 00:15:01,927 all the while looking for his son. 328 00:15:02,052 --> 00:15:05,139 And Buster was approached by his loving father. 329 00:15:05,222 --> 00:15:07,974 Do you think there's any chance this ship could break away from the dock? 330 00:15:08,057 --> 00:15:09,436 We're on a ship? 331 00:15:09,603 --> 00:15:11,394 And Maeby was trying to get the family 332 00:15:11,518 --> 00:15:13,979 to sign away the TVrights to their life stories. 333 00:15:14,105 --> 00:15:17,107 TV is not as good as it used to be, huh, Uncle Buster? 334 00:15:17,190 --> 00:15:20,442 But you could help me out by signing my petition to make it better. 335 00:15:20,525 --> 00:15:22,821 I kind of like Skating with Celebrities. 336 00:15:22,946 --> 00:15:25,155 Lucille was trying to get signatures, too. 337 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,158 Sign here that you won't sell. 338 00:15:27,241 --> 00:15:28,868 I don't need to sell, Lucille, 339 00:15:28,951 --> 00:15:31,869 because now I know that we're not related, I'm going to marry Michael. 340 00:15:31,952 --> 00:15:33,664 I always saw him with a younger girl. 341 00:15:33,748 --> 00:15:37,875 And Gob, angry at Michael for sending his son to the docks... 342 00:15:37,958 --> 00:15:39,083 Not related. 343 00:15:39,417 --> 00:15:42,671 ... went into a kind of knee-jerk revenge mode. 344 00:15:43,212 --> 00:15:46,550 Why go for the best, when you can go for the rest? 345 00:15:47,674 --> 00:15:50,260 Of your life, with a younger man. 346 00:15:52,387 --> 00:15:54,473 Kitty likes to scratch. 347 00:15:55,807 --> 00:15:57,767 Mom! Mom! 348 00:16:00,769 --> 00:16:02,897 Take these forms to everyone in the family 349 00:16:02,980 --> 00:16:05,981 and promise them 100 grand if they sign. 350 00:16:06,065 --> 00:16:09,736 And that's how Maeby found a way to get signatures on her release forms. 351 00:16:09,861 --> 00:16:11,736 That was a freebie. 352 00:16:12,529 --> 00:16:15,281 And soon, the crowd gathered to hear Michael. 353 00:16:15,364 --> 00:16:19,160 I just want to say how much this family really means to me. 354 00:16:19,826 --> 00:16:21,996 My father has always been there for me. 355 00:16:22,121 --> 00:16:23,580 He's a great man! 356 00:16:24,789 --> 00:16:29,669 My brother Gob, who I know would never do anything to hurt anyone in this family. 357 00:16:29,795 --> 00:16:34,882 Except for dating his nephew's girlfriend and hitting on his adopted sister. 358 00:16:35,007 --> 00:16:38,717 Buster, who faced his biggest fear to be here today. 359 00:16:38,884 --> 00:16:40,137 Second biggest. 360 00:16:40,513 --> 00:16:42,680 And my sister, Lindsay, yes, she is my sister, 361 00:16:42,806 --> 00:16:45,974 no matter what any piece of paper says. 362 00:16:46,516 --> 00:16:48,310 Lindsay and her husband, Tobias. 363 00:16:48,393 --> 00:16:52,688 You know, deep down, they both love each other very, very much. 364 00:16:53,231 --> 00:16:57,192 Most of all, my mother, who has always believed in me. 365 00:16:57,691 --> 00:17:00,277 Three years ago I made a choice. 366 00:17:04,156 --> 00:17:06,992 I made a choice to keep this family together. 367 00:17:07,574 --> 00:17:10,329 And that's when Michael finally cried. 368 00:17:10,995 --> 00:17:13,247 Today it looks like I succeeded. 369 00:17:15,041 --> 00:17:17,252 It wasn't exactly a turn-on. 370 00:17:24,257 --> 00:17:25,298 ...baby. 371 00:17:25,674 --> 00:17:27,884 Looks like George Michael got his mom back today, huh? 372 00:17:27,968 --> 00:17:29,761 Yeah, well, where is George Michael, by the way? 373 00:17:29,886 --> 00:17:32,096 He came by the yacht. Gave me this shiner. 374 00:17:32,221 --> 00:17:33,390 He hit you? What for? 375 00:17:33,515 --> 00:17:36,518 You know teenagers. Probably lashing out at you because of who I'm dating. 376 00:17:36,643 --> 00:17:38,602 - Who you dating? - Ann. 377 00:17:39,102 --> 00:17:40,396 - Her? - Don't worry. 378 00:17:40,521 --> 00:17:43,982 I didn't fight back or anything. I was like, "No, take the yacht. Please don't hurt me." 379 00:17:44,107 --> 00:17:45,649 You know, just build up the little guy's self-esteem. 380 00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:46,818 The yacht? 381 00:17:46,943 --> 00:17:49,779 Oh, for God's sake, Gob, I've gotta get off this ship. 382 00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:52,781 Mom, George Michael took off in Gob's yacht. I gotta go find him. 383 00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,283 Well, you can't go now. 384 00:17:54,408 --> 00:17:56,284 That's not gonna look good in front of the investors. 385 00:17:56,368 --> 00:17:59,996 - Mom, this is important, okay? - Michael, this company is important. 386 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:04,583 It was at that moment that Michael realised how much he'd sold out. 387 00:18:06,667 --> 00:18:10,379 Never seen a CEO cry like that before. Except at a sentencing. 388 00:18:10,504 --> 00:18:12,463 That's who you're putting in charge? 389 00:18:12,547 --> 00:18:14,840 I've made a huge mistake. 390 00:18:14,966 --> 00:18:17,719 Will you take the company for 20% above market? 391 00:18:17,844 --> 00:18:20,429 Ten. And I'll take the company off your hands right now. 392 00:18:20,554 --> 00:18:23,016 - Fifteen and I'll throw in Nellie. - She's 40. 393 00:18:23,141 --> 00:18:24,225 Twelve. 394 00:18:24,558 --> 00:18:28,602 Meanwhile, Michael searched the harbour and spotted the yacht. 395 00:18:30,396 --> 00:18:32,731 And Gob noticed something, too. 396 00:18:35,067 --> 00:18:37,277 Are those police boats? 397 00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:40,029 - Oh, my God, it's the SEC. - They still have boats? 398 00:18:40,154 --> 00:18:41,238 Prepare to be boarded. 399 00:18:41,363 --> 00:18:42,531 Did you do this? 400 00:18:42,656 --> 00:18:44,866 No. But I can't help but enjoy the irony 401 00:18:44,949 --> 00:18:48,287 that you might be losing three years of your life. 402 00:18:48,871 --> 00:18:53,082 This is why they dropped those other charges. You gave me up, George. 403 00:18:53,207 --> 00:18:55,500 George? I'm not George. George invited me. 404 00:18:55,625 --> 00:19:00,629 Stupid Oscar, when're you gonna learn there's no such thing as free shrimp. 405 00:19:00,921 --> 00:19:03,674 Well, I know it was someone in this family. 406 00:19:04,133 --> 00:19:06,218 Or someone who used to be. 407 00:19:07,636 --> 00:19:08,803 Annyong? 408 00:19:10,889 --> 00:19:13,182 But my real name is Hello. 409 00:19:15,602 --> 00:19:17,394 What the hell did you do this for? 410 00:19:17,479 --> 00:19:19,020 Because my grandfather vowed 411 00:19:19,145 --> 00:19:22,732 one day he would get even for banana stand you stole from him. 412 00:19:22,815 --> 00:19:23,900 It was true. 413 00:19:24,025 --> 00:19:26,526 Hello had gathered information against Lucille. 414 00:19:27,402 --> 00:19:29,197 To avenge his grandfather. 415 00:19:29,989 --> 00:19:31,989 Maeby ever mention my name? 416 00:19:32,114 --> 00:19:34,575 But Lucille was not going peacefully. 417 00:19:34,699 --> 00:19:36,912 You boys know how to shovel coal? 418 00:19:36,995 --> 00:19:40,621 I don't even want to tell you what these guys thought that meant. 419 00:19:41,206 --> 00:19:43,750 And Michael caught up with his son. 420 00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,335 George Michael, what're you doing? Where're you going? 421 00:19:46,460 --> 00:19:49,213 I can't stay here. Ann's moved on. Maeby's my cousin. 422 00:19:49,338 --> 00:19:51,881 We both know that's not an option. 423 00:19:52,006 --> 00:19:54,383 Buddy, Maeby is not your cousin. 424 00:19:55,344 --> 00:19:58,512 - What? - Yeah. I found out a couple of days ago. 425 00:19:58,637 --> 00:20:00,515 Aunt Lindsay was adopted. 426 00:20:01,430 --> 00:20:03,058 Why didn't you tell me this? 427 00:20:03,183 --> 00:20:05,351 Because you can't be with Maeby. 428 00:20:05,476 --> 00:20:09,189 You're 15 and, so inevitably, the relationship is gonna fall apart. 429 00:20:09,314 --> 00:20:12,148 And then what'll you do? She might not be a blood relative, 430 00:20:12,273 --> 00:20:13,901 but she is still family. 431 00:20:13,984 --> 00:20:17,905 And that's a bond that lasts forever. You don't wanna rock that boat. 432 00:20:19,321 --> 00:20:20,781 What the hell was that? 433 00:20:20,864 --> 00:20:22,032 It was his mother, 434 00:20:22,157 --> 00:20:25,493 who moments earlier had taken control of another Queen. 435 00:20:25,576 --> 00:20:27,204 Full steam, boys! 436 00:20:27,329 --> 00:20:28,703 This is degrading. 437 00:20:28,829 --> 00:20:30,457 I thought that we were gonna strip! 438 00:20:30,541 --> 00:20:31,665 Mother! 439 00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:42,466 And Buster faced his second biggest fear. 440 00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:44,260 I can't swim! I can't swim! 441 00:20:44,343 --> 00:20:45,803 And then his first. 442 00:20:48,806 --> 00:20:49,973 Oh, come on! 443 00:20:50,098 --> 00:20:53,433 And the two grand ladies made their escape together. 444 00:20:53,517 --> 00:20:57,646 Lucille Bluth, please pull over and step away from the historic ship. 445 00:20:57,771 --> 00:20:59,230 Gangy's trying to make a break for it. 446 00:20:59,354 --> 00:21:02,025 Well, I guess we should go back. Family sticks together, huh? 447 00:21:02,150 --> 00:21:04,318 Yeah. On the other hand, 448 00:21:04,443 --> 00:21:06,821 we do have a full tank of gas, a house in Cabo, 449 00:21:06,946 --> 00:21:09,447 and 500 grand in cashiers cheques. 450 00:21:09,573 --> 00:21:12,492 What say we give them no choice, 451 00:21:12,866 --> 00:21:16,412 but to keep themselves all together for a while. 452 00:21:18,789 --> 00:21:21,000 It was Arrested Development. 453 00:21:22,834 --> 00:21:28,338 On the epilogue, Michael wakes up to another strange bedfellow 454 00:21:28,463 --> 00:21:30,716 after his first night at sea. 455 00:21:30,841 --> 00:21:32,050 How was the party? 456 00:21:32,842 --> 00:21:37,306 And Maeby pitches her TVshow to a Hollywood icon, who says... 457 00:21:37,389 --> 00:21:40,556 No, I don't see it as a series. 458 00:21:42,309 --> 00:21:43,935 Maybe a movie. 459 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:22,885 English