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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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NARRATOR: George Sr. had come
to a political fund-raiser
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00:00:15,522 --> 00:00:18,274
to get support
for a wall project...
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LUCILLE: To separate
the U.S. and Mexico.
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NARRATOR:...that some
considered insensitive...
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- Which was my idea!
- Was your idea.
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- NARRATOR:...even though he himself...
- Oh. Tender.
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was feeling more sensitive
by the day.
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Curious feeling.
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But he tried to muster
the old self-confidence
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for his face time
with Herbert Love.
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GEORGE SR.: And I-I just think
there will be a lot of support
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flowing in this relationship,
and your base...
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You got a point
behind all those teeth of yours?
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(laughs)
If you support the wall,
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I'll give you
a piece of the action.
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- Action? Action Jackson?
- Yeah.
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- Yes, sir.
- What do I look like, Carl Weathers to you?
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- Oh, no, no.
- NARRATOR: Not at all.
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- No.
- This, of course, is Herbert Love.
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My name is Herbert Love,
and I want you
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to say "high-low"
to my low-high plan.
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A candidate
whose campaign slogan
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was embraced by everyone
from the very wealthy...
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And who doesn't want
a high income?
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...to their bankers
and tax attorneys.
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High-low, high-low,
it's off to work I go--for you.
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My name is Herbert Love,
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and I most definitely
approve this message.
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Do I look like someone
who eats at CW Swappigans?
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See, I stand for three things:
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one, getting
Barack Hussein Obama
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Wama Comma Mama on a Llama
out of office...
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It's a crazy-town name.
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Two, low taxes
for high income earners.
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That's my low-high plan.
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- I know it.
- And three,
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getting a little something
in my slushie fund
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so that I'm nice and loose
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and can help make
numbers one and two happen.
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I don't want to be the one to
say it, but I happen to be fond
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of redheads and greenbacks.
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- NARRATOR: George Sr. had neither.
- Oh, I-I...
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- How would you like both?
- Get it for me tonight,
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and I'll make your wall thing
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the third point
of my three-point plan.
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All I got right now is:
"You want to reach
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"your hand into my pocket
to pay for your birth control?
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I get to put my hand
in your pocket to put it in."
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But when unveiled it
in Garden Grove,
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I had to duck a
woman's pump and a mini pizza.
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Oops.
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NARRATOR:
Coming up with money, however,
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would be difficult
for George Sr.,
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who hadn't been acting
like his old self--
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something his twin brother
Oscar had done
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- You know, the wall.
- much more successfully
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earlier that day,
when, in retribution...
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Have you baked your brain
in that pizza oven?
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...to a brother
who lied to him...
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So he only did buy that land
for personal gain.
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Well... Oscar.
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- (chuckles) Oscar.
- ...Oscar chose to lie
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- with George's wife.
- Call me Father B.
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And, although too explicit
for an American audience,
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the lovemaking was intense
and beautiful
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but for one small
misunderstanding
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that occurred
during the afterglow.
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No. I-I mean...
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it's good to be out of that
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sweaty old hot box
at the compound.
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No, this was am...
this was amazing.
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NARRATOR: And Oscar finally got
more information
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- Speaking of that...
- about his brother's plans.
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...we may need to have
a president ready to go
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if something should happen
to Lucille 2
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while we're building the wall.
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So we are building a wall.
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Right where Oscar
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thought he would be spending
the rest of his life.
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(Lucille laughs)
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Turn him around three times
and put him in Fullerton,
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- he won't know the difference.
- Fullerton.
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You know, I think we should
send our son down there.
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Give him some training,
show that he has a job,
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let him sweat a little.
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Buster? No, no.
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I won't... I won't hear of it.
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It could kill him.
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I meant Gob.
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Oh. Oh, fine.
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Yeah, send him down.
I love that.
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NARRATOR:
Now the story of a family
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whose future
was abruptly canceled
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and the one father
who had no choice
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but to keep himself together.
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It's George Sr.'s...
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Unaware that he was being
cuckolded by his brother,
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George Sr. was struggling
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to find money
to bribe Herbert Love.
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Didn't someone die
in one of these things?
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Oh, no, not in one of ours.
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Although his pitch had lost
some of its luster.
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And, you know, I mean, it's
better than dying in the snow.
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I mean, not...
not-not that you'll die,
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but if you had to choose,
uh, I mean...
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- Brr, you know?
- Hmm.
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Well, I'll think about it.
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Would you like a mini-quiche?
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Oh, I'm so sorry.
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I thought you were a successful
Republican strategist.
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- I'm so sorry.
- Why, 'cause I'm black?
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Oh, no...
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NARRATOR:
It was over.
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But at least
he could go home...
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Cindy's going to love these.
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Excuse me, Red,
you're not the only one
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- who likes coconut shrimp.
- ...with some coconut shrimp.
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(laughs) Well, I should have
known you'd be here,
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supporting this right-wing,
dangerous crackpot.
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Lindsay, I forgot--
you dyed your hair.
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What are you doing here?
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I'm supporting Love, as well.
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We're both doing that.
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Oh, honey, I-I've wanted
to contact you
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every single day since last May.
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I haven't seen you
since January.
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00:04:43,497 --> 00:04:46,960
Yeah, the first four months,
I was in denial. How are you?
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Are... are you good?
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Do you have any money?
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Not really.
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- Oh.
- Oh, except for
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a $50, 000 check
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your wife sent to my daughter
for plastic surgery.
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What kind of a woman does that?
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I thought there
was no money left.
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Oh, no. Oh, no.
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Oh, that's awful.
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I mean, she's just precious
the way she is.
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Does Maisie even know
about this?
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No, thank God.
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And her name is Maeby.
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You don't think Maisie's cuter?
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00:05:15,446 --> 00:05:18,074
You know what I want to do?
I want to take this,
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and I want to deposit it
in a trust fund
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that she can't open
until she's 21.
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00:05:24,789 --> 00:05:27,708
- I guess I can't use it anyway.
- Are you kidding me?
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You are the most beautiful
little girl I know.
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And if you have any more work,
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your cartilage
is going to collapse.
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00:05:34,007 --> 00:05:35,424
Let me see if I can...
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00:05:35,466 --> 00:05:37,218
- There you go.
- NARRATOR: And that's when
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00:05:37,260 --> 00:05:39,679
George Sr. finally tipped
a black man.
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00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:40,805
- Got the check.
- HERBERT: ...okay?
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00:05:40,847 --> 00:05:41,806
Ooh! Hey, you got the check.
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00:05:41,848 --> 00:05:42,849
Third party.
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Oh, man.
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- I am going to put this on my wall.
- Oh...
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00:05:48,813 --> 00:05:51,607
NARRATOR: George Sr.
left the hotelhoping he'd
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00:05:51,649 --> 00:05:55,653
- accomplished something.
- (thunder rumbling)
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And on the news the next day...
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HERBERT:
We have got...
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00:05:59,324 --> 00:06:03,494
to build a wall
between us and Mexico.
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NARRATOR:
...he found out he had.
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00:06:05,163 --> 00:06:06,873
- (laughs) Yes!
- And aside from hating
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00:06:06,914 --> 00:06:09,125
the wrinkles he saw
in the rearview mirror
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00:06:09,167 --> 00:06:12,962
around his eyes and brow,
George Sr. was happy.
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00:06:13,004 --> 00:06:15,340
♪ All you need is smiles ♪
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00:06:17,091 --> 00:06:19,593
♪ Lots and lots
of smiley smiles ♪
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00:06:19,635 --> 00:06:20,845
♪ All you need is... ♪
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What the (bleep)
is he smiling about?
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00:06:24,015 --> 00:06:25,516
Hello!
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00:06:25,558 --> 00:06:27,227
Oh, we're just doing a survey
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00:06:27,268 --> 00:06:28,519
for the U.S. government, ma'am.
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00:06:28,561 --> 00:06:30,813
(laughing):
Oh, no, I-I'm a man.
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I was just wearing,
uh, this blouse
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00:06:33,524 --> 00:06:36,361
because I was, uh, driving
and I hate my arms.
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00:06:36,401 --> 00:06:37,778
What's the tape for?
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00:06:37,820 --> 00:06:39,239
Laying out border coordinates
180
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for when they put up the wall.
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00:06:40,948 --> 00:06:43,284
Shh! You're not supposed
to tell them what it's for.
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00:06:43,326 --> 00:06:44,827
Well, he already
mentioned the tape,
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and he looks American.
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- Yeah, but he's in Mexico.
- Wait.
185
00:06:48,206 --> 00:06:49,957
Guys, no, no, Mexico starts
186
00:06:49,999 --> 00:06:51,876
- back there, by the gully.
- Whoever told you that's
187
00:06:51,918 --> 00:06:53,961
probably chomping on the maca,
if you know what I mean.
188
00:06:54,003 --> 00:06:55,504
So, what you're saying
to me is that
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00:06:55,546 --> 00:06:58,091
on this side of the tape,
I'm in Mexico,
190
00:06:58,132 --> 00:06:59,842
but when I come over here...
191
00:06:59,884 --> 00:07:02,262
Whoa. We're going to need
to see a passport, sir.
192
00:07:02,303 --> 00:07:04,180
Pasaporte.
193
00:07:04,222 --> 00:07:06,182
NARRATOR: George Sr.
liked to make men
194
00:07:06,224 --> 00:07:08,475
who disappoint him suffer.
195
00:07:08,517 --> 00:07:10,228
But things change.
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00:07:10,270 --> 00:07:12,688
You really hurt
my feelings, guys.
197
00:07:12,730 --> 00:07:15,316
- No hugging... ma'am.
- I'm sorry.
198
00:07:15,358 --> 00:07:18,361
(George Sr. sobbing)
199
00:07:19,820 --> 00:07:21,655
NARRATOR: George Sr.
had just discovered
200
00:07:21,697 --> 00:07:23,866
that the millions of dollars
of American property
201
00:07:23,908 --> 00:07:26,244
he owned was worthless.
202
00:07:26,286 --> 00:07:27,620
How did you not notice?
203
00:07:27,661 --> 00:07:29,122
You saw all the papers.
204
00:07:29,163 --> 00:07:30,748
NARRATOR:
And in Mexico.
205
00:07:30,790 --> 00:07:33,293
You can't expect me to read
every page of that deal.
206
00:07:33,334 --> 00:07:35,054
Besides, that one
was particularly difficult
207
00:07:35,086 --> 00:07:36,796
because it was all in Spanish.
208
00:07:36,837 --> 00:07:38,923
It says very clearly,
on my business card,
209
00:07:38,965 --> 00:07:41,342
"Se habla español."
210
00:07:41,384 --> 00:07:42,843
"I do not speak Spanish."
211
00:07:42,885 --> 00:07:44,045
And it was your brother Oscar
212
00:07:44,053 --> 00:07:45,763
who told me it
was on the border.
213
00:07:45,805 --> 00:07:47,432
How did he not know?
214
00:07:47,473 --> 00:07:49,600
NARRATOR: Unfortunately,
Oscar missed the signs.
215
00:07:49,642 --> 00:07:51,602
You think it's okay
to burn these?
216
00:07:51,644 --> 00:07:52,979
OSCAR:
Well, this is America.
217
00:07:53,020 --> 00:07:54,730
If they don't want us
to burn signs,
218
00:07:54,772 --> 00:07:56,774
they shouldn't write them
in Spanish.
219
00:07:56,816 --> 00:08:00,694
- Everybody!
- ♪ Sign, sign, everywhere a sign... ♪
220
00:08:00,736 --> 00:08:02,863
NARRATOR:
Only Heartfire knew the truth.
221
00:08:02,905 --> 00:08:06,700
But the singing was so loud,
no one could hear her thoughts.
222
00:08:06,742 --> 00:08:08,786
I bribed Love
223
00:08:08,828 --> 00:08:11,080
to push for the building
of the wall,
224
00:08:11,122 --> 00:08:13,040
and I don't have the land
to build it on!
225
00:08:13,082 --> 00:08:14,834
BARRY: Shh, shh, shh.
Call Herbert Love, all right?
226
00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:16,836
Tell him you would
greatly appreciate it
227
00:08:16,877 --> 00:08:19,422
if he'd rescind his support
for the wall.
228
00:08:19,464 --> 00:08:21,507
And make him a flip-flopper?
I can't do that.
229
00:08:21,548 --> 00:08:22,967
NARRATOR:
Actually, he'd tried,
230
00:08:23,009 --> 00:08:24,551
but couldn't afford it.
231
00:08:24,593 --> 00:08:26,720
It's a 40 for the flip
and a 40 for the flop,
232
00:08:26,762 --> 00:08:29,474
and since it's going to cause
a flap, I'd say another 40.
233
00:08:29,515 --> 00:08:33,186
So it's a flat 40-40-40
flip-flop and a flap fee.
234
00:08:33,227 --> 00:08:35,896
Well, then find someone
who has influence with him.
235
00:08:35,938 --> 00:08:37,440
Hold on.
A client is, uh, coming,
236
00:08:37,482 --> 00:08:38,983
and I don't know where Oscar is.
237
00:08:39,025 --> 00:08:40,234
He's disappeared.
238
00:08:40,276 --> 00:08:42,320
And there is something up
with him
239
00:08:42,362 --> 00:08:44,405
because he is scary now.
240
00:08:44,447 --> 00:08:45,656
He has changed.
241
00:08:45,698 --> 00:08:47,533
Hey, you've changed,
you big (bleep).
242
00:08:47,574 --> 00:08:49,202
You're acting
like a little girl lately.
243
00:08:49,243 --> 00:08:50,495
And not in the good way.
244
00:08:50,536 --> 00:08:52,056
Pull yourself together.
Act like a man.
245
00:08:52,079 --> 00:08:53,498
GEORGE SR.:
You're right, you're right.
246
00:08:53,539 --> 00:08:56,501
- Okay, love you.
- Love you, too. Bye.
247
00:08:56,542 --> 00:08:58,127
Cash, no receipt.
248
00:08:58,169 --> 00:08:59,920
- Hot day, Father.
- Hot day, Father B.
249
00:08:59,962 --> 00:09:01,964
- Hot day.
- Hot day, Father.
250
00:09:02,006 --> 00:09:04,008
Hello, Father.
251
00:09:04,050 --> 00:09:05,343
Don't call me that!
252
00:09:05,385 --> 00:09:06,719
What are you doing here?
253
00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:08,762
- You and Mom talked about it.
- We did...?
254
00:09:08,804 --> 00:09:10,890
Oscar.
255
00:09:10,931 --> 00:09:13,851
NARRATOR: In fact, it was Oscar
who spoke to Lucille
256
00:09:13,893 --> 00:09:17,646
about hiring Gob, but not
before an ominous warning.
257
00:09:17,688 --> 00:09:20,316
But, you know,
he has magical abilities.
258
00:09:20,358 --> 00:09:23,944
He can handle a lot more
than we give him credit for.
259
00:09:23,986 --> 00:09:26,531
I know... What?!
260
00:09:26,572 --> 00:09:28,699
I would have been here sooner,
but I had to go down
261
00:09:28,741 --> 00:09:30,326
to San Diego
and loop my way back up
262
00:09:30,368 --> 00:09:32,036
because they put up
that border ribbon.
263
00:09:32,078 --> 00:09:33,538
- Which is totally new,
- Shh!
264
00:09:33,579 --> 00:09:35,122
and I wasn't expecting it;
it's fine.
265
00:09:35,164 --> 00:09:37,166
Anyway, Father,
you've got to get me a job
266
00:09:37,208 --> 00:09:38,876
so I can be prepared...
to be president.
267
00:09:38,918 --> 00:09:41,003
All right, you got to keep this
"father" stuff to yourself.
268
00:09:41,045 --> 00:09:43,548
I can't have these people think
that I raised a limo driver.
269
00:09:43,589 --> 00:09:45,258
I'm not a limo driver.
270
00:09:45,299 --> 00:09:46,926
I'm a gentleman honey farmer.
271
00:09:46,967 --> 00:09:49,011
The only thing I've got
back there are my bees.
272
00:09:49,053 --> 00:09:50,346
- Beans?
- No, bees!
273
00:09:50,388 --> 00:09:52,181
- Bees?
- Bees!
274
00:09:52,223 --> 00:09:54,225
Bees! Oh, bees!
275
00:09:54,267 --> 00:09:56,102
The boxes fell over
on the way here
276
00:09:56,143 --> 00:09:57,686
when I had to swerve
to avoid an ostrich.
277
00:09:57,728 --> 00:09:59,480
You got to do something
about this--these people
278
00:09:59,522 --> 00:10:00,773
paid a lot of money.
Do something!
279
00:10:00,814 --> 00:10:01,941
No, they won't listen to me.
280
00:10:01,982 --> 00:10:03,692
- They've all got CCD.
- CCD?
281
00:10:03,734 --> 00:10:04,944
Colony collapse disorder.
282
00:10:04,985 --> 00:10:06,779
The guy sold me
just really sick bees.
283
00:10:06,820 --> 00:10:08,573
Don't worry.
Dad, they're going to hive.
284
00:10:08,614 --> 00:10:09,907
They always hive.
285
00:10:09,949 --> 00:10:11,658
NARRATOR:
Usually by seeking out
286
00:10:11,700 --> 00:10:13,536
a structure
that most resembles a hive.
287
00:10:13,578 --> 00:10:16,747
Bees! Wonderful bees!
288
00:10:16,789 --> 00:10:18,791
GEORGE SR.: It's okay.
It's okay. Gob, get in there
289
00:10:18,832 --> 00:10:20,626
- and get them out!
- GOB: Okay, I'm on it.
290
00:10:20,667 --> 00:10:22,420
NARRATOR: But then George Sr.
got some more bad news.
291
00:10:22,462 --> 00:10:24,922
OSCAR: Hello, brother.
Thought I'd find you
292
00:10:24,964 --> 00:10:26,466
in a blouse and a beekeeper hat.
293
00:10:26,507 --> 00:10:27,925
What are you doing here?
No, no, no, no, no.
294
00:10:27,967 --> 00:10:29,676
We cannot be seen
next to each other.
295
00:10:29,718 --> 00:10:31,929
I'm Dr. Norman!
296
00:10:31,971 --> 00:10:33,222
Well, if you don't want
to be seen, then you
297
00:10:33,264 --> 00:10:35,682
go in the sweat lodge.
You owe me.
298
00:10:35,724 --> 00:10:38,060
Is that a fact?
Listen, you told me
299
00:10:38,102 --> 00:10:40,020
the property was on the border.
300
00:10:40,062 --> 00:10:42,940
It is 50 feet south
of the border, Oscar.
301
00:10:42,982 --> 00:10:46,652
Well, excuse me, but they hadn't
put up the tape yet.
302
00:10:46,693 --> 00:10:49,071
So I was going off Buster's map.
303
00:10:49,113 --> 00:10:51,073
Oh, God, it was Buster's map.
304
00:10:51,115 --> 00:10:52,866
NARRATOR:
Buster had indeed made the map,
305
00:10:52,908 --> 00:10:54,619
as a cartography student,
306
00:10:54,660 --> 00:10:57,246
because the class where you get
to see naked people,
307
00:10:57,288 --> 00:11:00,207
and draw them, was full.
308
00:11:00,249 --> 00:11:01,708
And you lied to me.
309
00:11:01,750 --> 00:11:03,794
You told me you bought
this property to live on.
310
00:11:03,836 --> 00:11:07,590
No, you bought this property
to put up a wall.
311
00:11:07,632 --> 00:11:09,175
I told one lie,
312
00:11:09,216 --> 00:11:11,302
but I-I was going to share
the money with you.
313
00:11:11,344 --> 00:11:12,970
- Two lies.
- And why do I think
314
00:11:13,012 --> 00:11:16,182
that you charge more than
five dollars for lemonade?
315
00:11:16,223 --> 00:11:17,891
Three small lies.
316
00:11:17,933 --> 00:11:20,186
Now, will you do me a favor,
just get in the tent.
317
00:11:20,227 --> 00:11:21,562
Gob's getting rid of the bees,
318
00:11:21,604 --> 00:11:23,105
and we'll push the matinee
till 3:00.
319
00:11:23,147 --> 00:11:25,483
No, I'm sick and tired
of being in that hut
320
00:11:25,525 --> 00:11:27,026
pretending to be you.
321
00:11:27,067 --> 00:11:30,737
Maybe I should go out there
and pretend to be you.
322
00:11:30,779 --> 00:11:32,031
So, good-bye, George.
323
00:11:32,072 --> 00:11:33,658
This is the last
you'll see of me.
324
00:11:33,698 --> 00:11:37,328
Just gonna use the can
for one second.
325
00:11:37,370 --> 00:11:39,830
CHINA GARDEN:
There's two Dr. Normans!
326
00:11:43,250 --> 00:11:45,628
NARRATOR: George Sr. headed up
north to see his wife
327
00:11:45,670 --> 00:11:48,297
before his brother could,
but he soon found out
328
00:11:48,339 --> 00:11:50,090
he was too late by a day.
329
00:11:50,132 --> 00:11:51,842
LUCILLE (over speakerphone):
Oh, I know what you're coming up
330
00:11:51,884 --> 00:11:53,427
- to do to me.
- Right.
331
00:11:53,469 --> 00:11:54,637
What?
332
00:11:54,679 --> 00:11:56,389
LUCILLE:
Yesterday, you were amazing.
333
00:11:56,430 --> 00:11:58,849
Georgie, I can't stop
thinking about it.
334
00:11:58,891 --> 00:12:01,143
You haven't been
like that in years.
335
00:12:01,185 --> 00:12:02,936
GEORGE SR.:
Oh, right.
336
00:12:02,978 --> 00:12:05,147
- You mean, slow-witted?
- I hope you're ready
337
00:12:05,189 --> 00:12:07,483
for more of the same today.
338
00:12:07,525 --> 00:12:09,151
(growls playfully)
339
00:12:09,193 --> 00:12:11,445
Uh... (sighs) Oh, God.
340
00:12:11,487 --> 00:12:12,988
George Sr. had a few problems:
341
00:12:13,030 --> 00:12:14,781
his brother was
sleeping with his wife,
342
00:12:14,823 --> 00:12:16,367
the property he was going to
sell to the government...
343
00:12:16,409 --> 00:12:17,910
(Lucille whispering)
344
00:12:17,951 --> 00:12:19,870
to build the U.S. wall on
was in Mexico...
345
00:12:19,912 --> 00:12:21,664
GEORGE SR.: All right...
all right...
346
00:12:21,706 --> 00:12:22,915
...and his sweat lodge colony
had just collapsed.
347
00:12:22,956 --> 00:12:24,458
Okay.
348
00:12:24,500 --> 00:12:26,252
So he had to deal with
first things first.
349
00:12:26,293 --> 00:12:28,713
GEORGE SR.:
If my identical twin brother
350
00:12:28,753 --> 00:12:31,257
can get it up, then shouldn't I?
351
00:12:31,298 --> 00:12:33,509
Have you had any sexual feeling
at all lately?
352
00:12:33,551 --> 00:12:35,135
No!
353
00:12:35,177 --> 00:12:37,338
You know, the Hopi Indians
believe that this spot here,
354
00:12:37,346 --> 00:12:38,889
- Okay.
- when manipulated,
355
00:12:38,931 --> 00:12:41,308
- can create sexual feeling.
- That's my penis.
356
00:12:41,350 --> 00:12:43,686
Well, you don't have to tell me.
Nothing?
357
00:12:43,728 --> 00:12:45,271
No, just a little curiosity
358
00:12:45,312 --> 00:12:47,231
as to why you're checking
your second hand.
359
00:12:47,273 --> 00:12:49,400
Oh, this isn't my office.
360
00:12:49,442 --> 00:12:51,193
You know, I-I don't get it.
361
00:12:51,235 --> 00:12:53,738
I've been popping the pills,
and, I mean, I mean, nothing.
362
00:12:53,820 --> 00:12:55,780
- Are you under any pressure?
- Oh, no.
363
00:12:55,822 --> 00:12:57,324
Nothing out of the ordinary.
364
00:12:57,366 --> 00:12:59,201
I mean, there's some
violating federal law stuff
365
00:12:59,243 --> 00:13:01,537
that'd put me in prison
for the rest of my life,
366
00:13:01,579 --> 00:13:04,582
but I've made love with
treason charges over me before.
367
00:13:04,624 --> 00:13:05,832
But no, it's something else.
368
00:13:05,874 --> 00:13:07,042
It's not just the sex.
369
00:13:07,084 --> 00:13:09,629
I feel...
370
00:13:09,670 --> 00:13:12,089
(sobbing):
I feel wrong.
371
00:13:12,131 --> 00:13:13,840
Somehow.
372
00:13:13,882 --> 00:13:15,800
(sobbing)
373
00:13:15,842 --> 00:13:18,763
And I'm becoming weak.
374
00:13:18,803 --> 00:13:19,930
(inhales)
375
00:13:19,972 --> 00:13:21,390
Sorry, had the old
thinking cap on.
376
00:13:21,432 --> 00:13:23,183
Let's go to the lists.
377
00:13:23,225 --> 00:13:24,893
NARRATOR: And Dr. Norman
proceeded to run through
378
00:13:24,935 --> 00:13:26,937
a checklist of alternative
medicine questions.
379
00:13:26,979 --> 00:13:28,439
Okay, did you drink some water
that might have
380
00:13:28,481 --> 00:13:30,065
a homeopathic memory
of some molecule?
381
00:13:30,107 --> 00:13:31,275
Do you keep track
382
00:13:31,317 --> 00:13:32,652
of the molecules you ingest?
383
00:13:32,693 --> 00:13:34,069
Well, with homeopathy,
384
00:13:34,111 --> 00:13:35,571
it's the molecules
you don't ingest.
385
00:13:35,613 --> 00:13:36,947
But I'm the one
who can get hard,
386
00:13:36,989 --> 00:13:38,616
so let's focus on you.
387
00:13:38,658 --> 00:13:40,951
He then went on to explore
some supernatural
388
00:13:40,993 --> 00:13:42,473
or high-concept
premise possibilities.
389
00:13:42,495 --> 00:13:44,204
Any earthquakes
in a Chinese restaurant
390
00:13:44,246 --> 00:13:46,206
- while you were trying to prove
something to your mother? - No.
391
00:13:46,248 --> 00:13:47,583
Any wishes you may have
phrased badly,
392
00:13:47,625 --> 00:13:49,335
or while a child
was blowing out a candle?
393
00:13:49,376 --> 00:13:50,961
No.
394
00:13:51,003 --> 00:13:52,797
Have you come across
any ancient games, let's say,
395
00:13:52,837 --> 00:13:56,091
glowing games, uh, either
board based or carnival based,
396
00:13:56,133 --> 00:13:58,594
that you may have played against
the wishes of your best friend?
397
00:13:58,636 --> 00:14:00,638
- No.
- Curses, hexes, spells,
398
00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:04,517
shaman, medicine men?
399
00:14:04,558 --> 00:14:06,185
Wait.
400
00:14:06,226 --> 00:14:08,604
The strong will become the weak.
401
00:14:08,646 --> 00:14:11,273
The weak will become the strong.
402
00:14:11,315 --> 00:14:15,235
I did hallucinate one ancient
foreboding warrior harbinger
403
00:14:15,277 --> 00:14:17,655
while I chewed maca root
about a year ago.
404
00:14:17,697 --> 00:14:19,448
Could that be something?
405
00:14:19,490 --> 00:14:21,283
- No, it's not the maca.
- (filtered breathing)
406
00:14:21,325 --> 00:14:22,493
Your body wants the maca.
407
00:14:22,535 --> 00:14:23,869
It's not the maca.
408
00:14:23,910 --> 00:14:25,954
But finally,
out of desperation,
409
00:14:25,996 --> 00:14:27,456
he turned to Western medicine.
410
00:14:27,498 --> 00:14:29,208
Okay, tell you what,
let's get some film on you.
411
00:14:29,249 --> 00:14:31,585
I'd like you to get
on an MRI machine
412
00:14:31,627 --> 00:14:33,128
and try to ride it to climax.
413
00:14:33,170 --> 00:14:34,714
I'm gonna send you over
to Orange County Imaging--
414
00:14:34,755 --> 00:14:36,507
they do a ton of that.
415
00:14:36,549 --> 00:14:38,091
Okay, do I get magazines?
416
00:14:38,133 --> 00:14:40,135
Yeah, I'll write you
a script for that.
417
00:14:40,177 --> 00:14:42,638
They got a place right around
the corner that plays ball.
418
00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,014
- Thank you.
- (men shouting in Spanish)
419
00:14:44,056 --> 00:14:45,391
Oh, (bleep). Run.
420
00:14:45,432 --> 00:14:48,268
What? Oh.
421
00:14:48,310 --> 00:14:51,021
And soon, after getting
his prescription filled...
422
00:14:51,063 --> 00:14:52,022
Uh... hola...
423
00:14:52,064 --> 00:14:54,441
I have a, um--magazines?
424
00:14:57,236 --> 00:14:58,612
(men conversing quietly)
425
00:14:58,654 --> 00:15:00,113
...he was on his way
426
00:15:00,155 --> 00:15:02,533
to debase himself
in an MRI machine
427
00:15:02,575 --> 00:15:06,286
when he ran into a son
with whom he'd lost touch.
428
00:15:09,540 --> 00:15:11,250
Dad, what are you doing here?
429
00:15:11,291 --> 00:15:15,337
I wanted to speak to you...
in person.
430
00:15:15,379 --> 00:15:16,922
Then you're here to apologize;
that right?
431
00:15:16,963 --> 00:15:18,643
- Sure.
- Although, he covered pretty well.
432
00:15:18,674 --> 00:15:22,553
And-and of course to see you
at Orange County Im-a-gine.
433
00:15:22,595 --> 00:15:25,681
I went to you
for a simple signature,
434
00:15:25,723 --> 00:15:27,974
and you told me to go to hell.
435
00:15:28,016 --> 00:15:30,436
Actually, it was
the newly potent Oscar,
436
00:15:30,477 --> 00:15:32,813
who, like one of
Gob's sick bees,
437
00:15:32,855 --> 00:15:35,900
was pollinating one barren
flower after another,
438
00:15:35,941 --> 00:15:36,859
who told Michael to go to hell.
439
00:15:36,901 --> 00:15:38,861
- Go to hell.
- Huh?
440
00:15:38,903 --> 00:15:41,029
Which is how George Sr.
441
00:15:41,071 --> 00:15:42,948
not only was left with
Senor Senoritas,
442
00:15:42,989 --> 00:15:45,325
and that's when he got a lead
on his wall problem.
443
00:15:45,367 --> 00:15:47,035
Do you know a guy
named Herbert Love?
444
00:15:47,077 --> 00:15:48,621
I know a lot of people, sure.
445
00:15:48,662 --> 00:15:50,915
And soon, he surprised Michael
446
00:15:50,956 --> 00:15:52,999
by giving him his rights
for the movie project.
447
00:15:53,041 --> 00:15:57,379
I didn't know it was about
lying to a girl.
448
00:15:57,421 --> 00:16:00,215
- Give me the release.
- You'd do this for me?
449
00:16:00,257 --> 00:16:02,217
- Of course I will.
- And then, didn't surprise him.
450
00:16:02,259 --> 00:16:04,553
If you'll do something for me.
451
00:16:04,595 --> 00:16:06,680
I knew it.
452
00:16:06,722 --> 00:16:10,392
Michael, you got to get
this Love guy against the wall
453
00:16:10,434 --> 00:16:11,685
between the U.S. and Mexico.
454
00:16:11,727 --> 00:16:13,103
That's not right.
455
00:16:13,145 --> 00:16:14,438
You're really opposed
to this wall, huh?
456
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:15,606
When did you
become pro-immigrant?
457
00:16:15,648 --> 00:16:16,732
I have changed, Michael.
458
00:16:16,774 --> 00:16:19,318
I cry (clears throat)
459
00:16:19,359 --> 00:16:22,237
at the drop of a hat,
and I hate the way I look.
460
00:16:22,279 --> 00:16:25,282
I actually had one cute hat,
and it...
461
00:16:25,324 --> 00:16:30,120
it blew off
at the CVS parking lot.
462
00:16:30,162 --> 00:16:33,081
(sobbing): And this whole car
full of black kids ran over it,
463
00:16:33,123 --> 00:16:34,207
for no reason.
464
00:16:34,249 --> 00:16:36,919
And they saw it!
465
00:16:36,961 --> 00:16:38,754
They saw it!
466
00:16:38,796 --> 00:16:40,547
Michael...
467
00:16:40,589 --> 00:16:42,549
(pats bench)
468
00:16:42,591 --> 00:16:45,845
Anyway, I live down there now.
469
00:16:45,886 --> 00:16:48,305
And I care for these people
who just want
470
00:16:48,347 --> 00:16:51,350
to come into this country
and ply their wares
471
00:16:51,391 --> 00:16:54,227
and let us freely fill the bay
with their culture.
472
00:16:54,269 --> 00:16:56,229
Hey, don't get me started
on the Cinco, Dad.
473
00:16:56,271 --> 00:16:58,023
I haven't been to one
in 20 years.
474
00:16:58,064 --> 00:16:59,775
There's gonna be blowback there;
it's just gonna happen.
475
00:16:59,817 --> 00:17:01,944
You can't swim in that bay
for a month after
476
00:17:01,986 --> 00:17:03,737
without getting
nacho cheese sauce in your hair.
477
00:17:03,779 --> 00:17:05,030
It's coming.
478
00:17:05,071 --> 00:17:07,407
Can you help me, then,
with Love?
479
00:17:07,449 --> 00:17:09,242
At his speech, at Cinco?
480
00:17:09,284 --> 00:17:11,203
Can you do that for your dad?
481
00:17:11,244 --> 00:17:14,373
What he didn't tell Michael was
that the family would go broke
482
00:17:14,414 --> 00:17:16,375
if they had to build the wall.
483
00:17:16,416 --> 00:17:18,460
Of course I will.
484
00:17:20,420 --> 00:17:22,715
Maybe, if he had,
Michael wouldn't have
485
00:17:22,756 --> 00:17:25,133
overplayed his hand
as a big-shot producer
486
00:17:25,175 --> 00:17:27,093
who knew lots of people.
487
00:17:27,135 --> 00:17:28,554
But a deal was soon struck...
488
00:17:28,595 --> 00:17:30,138
- Thanks, Pop.
- All right.
489
00:17:30,180 --> 00:17:32,057
...and Michael,
signed contract in hand,
490
00:17:32,098 --> 00:17:34,184
went to show off
at the Ealing Club,
491
00:17:34,226 --> 00:17:36,645
while George Sr.,
magazine in hand,
492
00:17:36,687 --> 00:17:39,439
went to (bleep) off
in an MRI machine.
493
00:17:45,237 --> 00:17:48,407
NARRATOR: George Sr. finally
went to visit a wife
494
00:17:48,448 --> 00:17:51,410
who was under the impression
that he was back for more.
495
00:17:51,451 --> 00:17:52,828
The wrong land?
496
00:17:52,870 --> 00:17:54,747
It's under control;
I'm trying to get Love
497
00:17:54,788 --> 00:17:56,373
to come out against the wall.
498
00:17:56,415 --> 00:17:58,834
We can't afford to build it
if we're not
499
00:17:58,876 --> 00:18:00,794
selling the land
back to the government.
500
00:18:00,836 --> 00:18:02,337
It'll ruin us.
501
00:18:02,379 --> 00:18:04,673
It'll ruin us
if we don't build it.
502
00:18:04,715 --> 00:18:07,342
George, you've gone puny again.
503
00:18:07,384 --> 00:18:09,803
Where's the man who took
ahold of me yesterday
504
00:18:09,845 --> 00:18:11,221
and bent me over this couch?
505
00:18:11,263 --> 00:18:14,016
Okay, okay,
let's not sully its memory.
506
00:18:14,058 --> 00:18:18,228
Look, we make sure Herbert Love
comes out against the wall,
507
00:18:18,270 --> 00:18:20,313
right after we get
enough of it up
508
00:18:20,355 --> 00:18:22,232
to trigger
the government payment.
509
00:18:22,274 --> 00:18:24,985
And speaking of
getting enough of it up,
510
00:18:25,027 --> 00:18:26,653
what's going on down here?
511
00:18:26,695 --> 00:18:30,198
You need a little more Marilyn
like I did yesterday?
512
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:33,285
♪ Happy birthday,
Mr. President... ♪
513
00:18:33,326 --> 00:18:34,787
I-I don't want to be
Mr. President.
514
00:18:34,828 --> 00:18:37,581
Huh. Especially with
all this going down.
515
00:18:37,623 --> 00:18:40,876
Oh, and speaking of president,
what's happening with Gob?
516
00:18:40,918 --> 00:18:42,210
You gave him a job?
517
00:18:42,252 --> 00:18:43,963
Yes, but then I-I fired him.
518
00:18:44,004 --> 00:18:45,839
He caused my colony to collapse.
519
00:18:45,881 --> 00:18:49,175
Oh, my God, George,
get him another job.
520
00:18:49,217 --> 00:18:51,971
You must have some favors
you can call in somewhere.
521
00:18:52,012 --> 00:18:56,182
And then you can have some of
my favors, Mr. President.
522
00:18:56,224 --> 00:18:57,977
As much as I'd like to stay
523
00:18:58,018 --> 00:18:59,436
and lay some more pipe with you,
524
00:18:59,478 --> 00:19:01,354
I better get moving
on this thing.
525
00:19:01,396 --> 00:19:02,606
And so, the next day,
526
00:19:02,648 --> 00:19:04,984
George Sr. once again
called upon his son.
527
00:19:05,025 --> 00:19:06,526
Michael B. Project.
528
00:19:06,568 --> 00:19:08,487
GEORGE SR.:
Yeah, you got to give Gob a job.
529
00:19:08,528 --> 00:19:10,072
Something in
the, uh, building company
530
00:19:10,114 --> 00:19:13,075
or, uh, hey, I think
he'd get a big kick
531
00:19:13,117 --> 00:19:14,367
out of the movie business.
532
00:19:14,409 --> 00:19:15,619
N-N-No, Dad, hey.
533
00:19:15,661 --> 00:19:17,370
He knows nothing
about producing.
534
00:19:17,412 --> 00:19:19,623
GEORGE SR.: Look, I don't care
if it's producing a movie
535
00:19:19,665 --> 00:19:21,041
that's never gonna be made
536
00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:23,293
or selling houses
that no one's gonna buy,
537
00:19:23,335 --> 00:19:25,796
I just want my son
to have a job
538
00:19:25,838 --> 00:19:28,674
where his incompetence
won't be out of place.
539
00:19:28,715 --> 00:19:30,884
Anyway, he's on his way
to Sudden Valley now.
540
00:19:30,926 --> 00:19:32,761
No, he isn't.
No, no, come on, Dad...
541
00:19:32,803 --> 00:19:34,220
- No, no, now?
- GEORGE SR.: What, what?
542
00:19:34,262 --> 00:19:35,764
He's gonna make it
less valuable?
543
00:19:35,806 --> 00:19:37,223
Which I told you
was gonna happen, by the way.
544
00:19:37,265 --> 00:19:38,558
MICHAEL: Oh, here it is.
Here it is.
545
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:40,435
Yeah, there it is!
Knew it was coming.
546
00:19:40,477 --> 00:19:42,938
NARRATOR: And even though George
had imposed on Michael,
547
00:19:42,980 --> 00:19:44,356
it was Gob...
548
00:19:44,397 --> 00:19:46,232
GOB:
What the hell?
549
00:19:46,274 --> 00:19:48,276
...who felt
he had a cross to bear.
550
00:19:48,318 --> 00:19:51,030
MICHAEL:
What the hell?
551
00:19:51,071 --> 00:19:52,739
(tires screeching,
horns honking)
552
00:19:52,781 --> 00:19:54,282
MICHAEL: Hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, I got the right of--
553
00:19:54,324 --> 00:19:56,044
- Hey, hey, hey...
- N-No, don't. It's mine.
554
00:19:56,076 --> 00:19:57,953
- Okay, coming through here.
- Mine... Hah!
555
00:19:57,995 --> 00:20:00,622
No... no, no!
My right of... way!
556
00:20:00,664 --> 00:20:02,207
- There! Mine!
- Okay. (weak laugh)
557
00:20:02,248 --> 00:20:03,458
Hey...
558
00:20:08,172 --> 00:20:09,173
Gob!
559
00:20:09,214 --> 00:20:10,674
(chuckles):
Michael!
560
00:20:10,716 --> 00:20:11,967
And the two brothers
reunited...
561
00:20:12,009 --> 00:20:13,052
Hey, Gob.
562
00:20:13,093 --> 00:20:14,094
Michael.
563
00:20:14,136 --> 00:20:15,679
...happy to see each other.
564
00:20:15,721 --> 00:20:17,181
Gob?
565
00:20:17,222 --> 00:20:18,640
At first.
566
00:20:18,682 --> 00:20:21,101
Michael.
567
00:20:21,143 --> 00:20:23,020
So, hear you need help moving
568
00:20:23,062 --> 00:20:25,981
these memorials to the death
of the housing market.
569
00:20:26,023 --> 00:20:28,734
(mailbox plays tune,
then stops)
570
00:20:28,775 --> 00:20:30,235
Actually that was a memorial
571
00:20:30,276 --> 00:20:32,696
- to the death of Pete the mailman.
- I knew that.
572
00:20:32,738 --> 00:20:36,116
I brought one, too--
size of the man's heart.
573
00:20:36,158 --> 00:20:38,952
I just got to figure out
how to get it out of the car.
574
00:20:38,994 --> 00:20:40,871
If I could remember
how I got it in.
575
00:20:40,913 --> 00:20:42,831
That's not
from your Christian magic act?
576
00:20:42,873 --> 00:20:45,042
Christian magic act?
577
00:20:45,084 --> 00:20:47,460
If I were Muslim, would you say
"Muslim magic act"?
578
00:20:47,502 --> 00:20:51,506
No, but it is hard to imagine
any Muslim handcuffing himself
579
00:20:51,548 --> 00:20:54,426
to a glittery cross
and living to tell about it.
580
00:20:54,467 --> 00:20:56,803
Yeah, well, the Christians
aren't so (bleep)-hot
581
00:20:56,845 --> 00:20:58,597
about it either.
582
00:20:58,638 --> 00:21:00,974
Hmm, well...
583
00:21:01,016 --> 00:21:03,643
NARRATOR: Michael could see
that his brother was unhappy
584
00:21:03,685 --> 00:21:05,437
and that his life had not
worked out
585
00:21:05,478 --> 00:21:07,313
the way he had hoped.
586
00:21:07,355 --> 00:21:11,276
Things are incredible for me,
I'm having an incredible year.
587
00:21:11,317 --> 00:21:13,820
I am a movie producer now,
producing a movie,
588
00:21:13,862 --> 00:21:15,321
so they've got me
in this enormous office.
589
00:21:15,363 --> 00:21:16,803
I told 'em
I don't want to be driving
590
00:21:16,823 --> 00:21:18,408
to Beverly Hills
every single day,
591
00:21:18,450 --> 00:21:21,703
so they put me in an enormous
office just over here.
592
00:21:24,497 --> 00:21:26,041
Rental.
593
00:21:26,083 --> 00:21:28,919
My personal life is off
the charts. I've met someone.
594
00:21:28,961 --> 00:21:31,797
Can't really give you any
information--kind of famousy.
595
00:21:31,838 --> 00:21:33,465
- Well, good for you. I also met someone.
- Have you?
596
00:21:33,506 --> 00:21:36,009
Also famousy.
Can't give you any information.
597
00:21:36,051 --> 00:21:38,595
In fact, Michael didn't even
find out who she was
598
00:21:38,637 --> 00:21:40,722
until one night, earlier.
599
00:21:40,764 --> 00:21:43,142
Oh, my God. I'm dating Ron
Howard's girlfriend.
600
00:21:43,183 --> 00:21:45,769
Although he did have
some of the details wrong.
601
00:21:45,811 --> 00:21:47,896
She's an actress.
You know her.
602
00:21:47,938 --> 00:21:51,150
She was Ron's
illegitimate daughter,
603
00:21:51,191 --> 00:21:52,567
a fact unbeknownst to many.
604
00:21:52,609 --> 00:21:54,444
Well, we kind of like to keep
that quiet.
605
00:21:54,486 --> 00:21:58,657
A woman who, like Bryce Dallas
and Paige Carlyle,
606
00:21:58,698 --> 00:22:01,660
was named after
where she was conceived.
607
00:22:01,701 --> 00:22:05,538
And she actually had worked
for some A-list directors.
608
00:22:05,580 --> 00:22:06,999
She did a Terrence Malick...
609
00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:09,293
REBEL:
Are we the same?
610
00:22:09,334 --> 00:22:10,794
She got the lead
in a Woody Allen film...
611
00:22:10,836 --> 00:22:12,516
But I felt like I was in
The Iceman Cometh,
612
00:22:12,545 --> 00:22:15,048
but, you know,
in my case, he faketh.
613
00:22:15,090 --> 00:22:17,217
...and was once even directed
by her own father.
614
00:22:17,259 --> 00:22:18,343
Action!
615
00:22:18,384 --> 00:22:20,304
Next time, don't pocket it,
616
00:22:20,345 --> 00:22:21,346
pay for it.
617
00:22:21,387 --> 00:22:23,765
Shoplifting: not cool.
618
00:22:23,807 --> 00:22:26,685
- ...in a public service announcement.
- And cut!
619
00:22:26,726 --> 00:22:27,853
Which, like all of
Ron's work...
620
00:22:27,894 --> 00:22:29,062
You know, I think we got it.
621
00:22:29,104 --> 00:22:31,148
...was inspired
by a photograph.
622
00:22:31,190 --> 00:22:32,899
Rebel was indeed a rebel.
623
00:22:32,941 --> 00:22:35,902
But Michael didn't possess
that information.
624
00:22:35,944 --> 00:22:37,904
I can give you some information
about your airless office
625
00:22:37,946 --> 00:22:39,489
you're gonna be spending
most mornings in.
626
00:22:39,531 --> 00:22:40,949
You know, what I could go for
is some guac.
627
00:22:40,991 --> 00:22:42,450
Well, you don't live there
anymore, Gob.
628
00:22:42,492 --> 00:22:44,703
This heat just makes,
makes me want guac.
629
00:22:44,744 --> 00:22:46,746
Now, now, I know
I've got these things,
630
00:22:46,788 --> 00:22:49,291
uh, very, you know,
meticulously maintained.
631
00:22:49,333 --> 00:22:51,793
- (squawk)
- There's...
632
00:22:51,835 --> 00:22:53,003
There are some vultures.
633
00:22:53,045 --> 00:22:55,172
I think they might
still smell Pete.
634
00:22:55,214 --> 00:22:57,174
Yeah, if it wasn't for the movie
thing, I would do it myself.
635
00:22:57,216 --> 00:22:58,842
They practically sell
themselves; you just got
636
00:22:58,884 --> 00:23:00,969
- to bring the people in.
- I'm ready to move in today.
637
00:23:01,011 --> 00:23:02,846
No, well, people other than you,
638
00:23:02,888 --> 00:23:04,472
- bring those people in.
- I'm starving.
639
00:23:04,514 --> 00:23:05,765
Starving? No, you're not
gonna find anything here.
640
00:23:05,807 --> 00:23:06,967
They've been abandoned for...
641
00:23:09,393 --> 00:23:11,771
Lindsay.
642
00:23:11,813 --> 00:23:14,649
No, no, this--maybe Tobias.
643
00:23:14,691 --> 00:23:15,859
NARRATOR:
It was John Beard.
644
00:23:15,901 --> 00:23:17,443
Shall we?
645
00:23:17,485 --> 00:23:19,196
Well, the value of these homes
isn't gonna go down
646
00:23:19,238 --> 00:23:20,446
if we don't sell one today.
647
00:23:20,488 --> 00:23:23,158
Let me see
if I can find a, uh...
648
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:24,534
Do you have a bottle opener?
649
00:23:24,576 --> 00:23:26,536
Great idea.
650
00:23:26,578 --> 00:23:28,830
And after a few more drinks and
a little more depreciation...
651
00:23:28,872 --> 00:23:30,874
- That was surprising.
- ...Michael admitted he had
652
00:23:30,916 --> 00:23:32,292
a rival for his girlfriend.
653
00:23:32,334 --> 00:23:35,003
You don't have to worry
about Ron Howard.
654
00:23:35,045 --> 00:23:36,922
I mean, he's not
competition for you.
655
00:23:36,963 --> 00:23:38,257
- Really?
- Yeah, I mean, the guy's
656
00:23:38,298 --> 00:23:40,050
like 100 years old.
What's he gonna do,
657
00:23:40,092 --> 00:23:41,425
poke you in the eyes?
658
00:23:41,467 --> 00:23:42,594
Oh, you're confused.
659
00:23:42,635 --> 00:23:43,678
Ron Howard directed Apollo 13.
660
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:45,389
You're thinking of Moe Howard,
661
00:23:45,429 --> 00:23:47,391
the angry stooge who's been dead
for a quarter century.
662
00:23:47,431 --> 00:23:49,226
Well, that's good 'cause the
whole time I'm thinking, like,
663
00:23:49,268 --> 00:23:50,560
"unless she likes
a guy who's funny."
664
00:23:50,602 --> 00:23:52,271
- Sure.
- Because that guy is funny.
665
00:23:52,312 --> 00:23:53,813
- 'Cause the whole time you're like...
- You know...
666
00:23:53,855 --> 00:23:55,607
- "Is he gonna poke me in the eyes?"
- Gob,
667
00:23:55,648 --> 00:23:58,193
I don't think that th-the
movie--it might not even happen
668
00:23:58,235 --> 00:24:00,237
because I don't think
that I can ask my son.
669
00:24:00,279 --> 00:24:02,906
What happened between him and me
was very disappointing.
670
00:24:02,948 --> 00:24:04,950
You don't need to tell me
about disappointment and sons.
671
00:24:04,991 --> 00:24:07,911
Let's not forget Steve Holt.
672
00:24:07,953 --> 00:24:10,330
That's the story
of our relationship.
673
00:24:10,372 --> 00:24:12,540
Right, well, I was talking about
a son disappointing a father.
674
00:24:12,582 --> 00:24:14,126
Yeah, that does make it
different.
675
00:24:14,167 --> 00:24:16,628
Look, Michael,
he doesn't respect you,
676
00:24:16,669 --> 00:24:17,921
so you have
to make him respect you.
677
00:24:17,963 --> 00:24:19,505
Show him that you're a big shot,
678
00:24:19,547 --> 00:24:21,549
that you don't need to
live in your son's dorm.
679
00:24:21,591 --> 00:24:23,760
(sighs) No, I just live
in my parents' penthouse now.
680
00:24:23,802 --> 00:24:25,595
Well, then, take him to the
Ealing Club; it's all showbiz.
681
00:24:25,637 --> 00:24:27,013
I used to hang out there
all the time.
682
00:24:27,055 --> 00:24:29,057
It's just actresses
and stuff like that.
683
00:24:29,099 --> 00:24:30,725
I don't know
if I could pick up the phone
684
00:24:30,767 --> 00:24:32,560
and call him and ask him.
685
00:24:32,602 --> 00:24:33,979
- You know what, Michael?
- Hmm?
686
00:24:34,020 --> 00:24:35,814
I'll call him for you.
687
00:24:36,940 --> 00:24:38,900
Really, you'd do that for me?
688
00:24:38,942 --> 00:24:40,444
It's the least I could do.
689
00:24:40,484 --> 00:24:42,528
You've given me
a new sense of purpose.
690
00:24:42,570 --> 00:24:45,449
Did you actually have
an old one?
691
00:24:45,489 --> 00:24:47,449
'Cause it always seemed
like you were just looking
692
00:24:47,451 --> 00:24:48,827
for the easy way out.
693
00:24:48,868 --> 00:24:51,371
Yeah, that was it.
694
00:24:51,413 --> 00:24:54,040
Hi, I'm George Bluth
of the Bluth Company, and, uh...
695
00:24:54,082 --> 00:24:55,962
NARRATOR: George Sr.,
meanwhile, was also finding
696
00:24:56,001 --> 00:24:57,401
an easy way out
of the wall problem.
697
00:24:57,419 --> 00:24:58,837
...we've built this wall.
698
00:24:58,878 --> 00:25:03,091
We have miles and,
and miles of wall.
699
00:25:03,133 --> 00:25:05,051
Will you confirm that, soldier?
700
00:25:05,093 --> 00:25:07,553
(soldier grunts, gags)
701
00:25:07,595 --> 00:25:09,139
It's ab-about protecting
our border,
702
00:25:09,181 --> 00:25:10,932
which is why, uh,
we have a member
703
00:25:10,974 --> 00:25:13,935
of our armed forces
with us today.
704
00:25:13,977 --> 00:25:15,728
- (coughing)
- Say hello.
705
00:25:15,770 --> 00:25:17,230
(Buster grunts)
706
00:25:17,272 --> 00:25:19,774
It's, uh, triple-reinforced,
steel-reinforced,
707
00:25:19,816 --> 00:25:22,694
and I don't really
know how to, how to say
708
00:25:22,735 --> 00:25:26,072
that, uh, what it does is,
it protects, um...
709
00:25:26,114 --> 00:25:27,657
It's Mexican-proof.
710
00:25:27,699 --> 00:25:29,451
(laughing):
So-- can't say-- it...
711
00:25:29,493 --> 00:25:31,286
Well, gosh darn it,
712
00:25:31,328 --> 00:25:33,163
it is Mexican-proof.
713
00:25:33,205 --> 00:25:34,331
(gags, snorts)
714
00:25:34,373 --> 00:25:35,539
Sit up.
715
00:25:35,581 --> 00:25:36,791
- Uh...
- Daddy, my tummy's turning.
716
00:25:36,833 --> 00:25:38,210
All right.
717
00:25:38,251 --> 00:25:39,752
- Uh, it's, uh, triple-reinforced.
- I got...
718
00:25:39,794 --> 00:25:41,087
Daddy, I got to get out,
719
00:25:41,129 --> 00:25:42,546
- I got to get out.
- Uh, we're gonna be...
720
00:25:42,588 --> 00:25:43,882
Oh, for God's sakes, get out.
721
00:25:43,923 --> 00:25:45,467
I need to get out,
I need to get out.
722
00:25:45,509 --> 00:25:47,219
- Oh, for...
- I need to get out, I need to get out.
723
00:25:47,260 --> 00:25:50,096
We're not gonna... we'll edit
this part out and, uh...
724
00:25:50,138 --> 00:25:51,848
Anyhow...
725
00:25:51,890 --> 00:25:54,476
NARRATOR: But George Sr.
hadn't built miles of wall.
726
00:25:54,518 --> 00:25:58,604
He just found a roundabout way
to make it seem that way,
727
00:25:58,646 --> 00:26:01,066
and one week later at Cinco,
George arrived,
728
00:26:01,107 --> 00:26:02,484
hoping to hear Herbert Love...
729
00:26:02,526 --> 00:26:04,319
No, thanks. I've already crushed
one with my car.
730
00:26:04,361 --> 00:26:07,322
...sway public opinion
against the wall
731
00:26:07,364 --> 00:26:09,157
so the Bluth Company
wouldn't be on the hook
732
00:26:09,199 --> 00:26:10,574
- to build it for real.
- Pop, hey, hi.
733
00:26:10,616 --> 00:26:12,536
- Michael, what happened?
- Yeah.
734
00:26:12,576 --> 00:26:14,496
Oh, the--it's a terrible week,
735
00:26:14,538 --> 00:26:16,915
but I'm gonna fix things
once and for all right now.
736
00:26:16,956 --> 00:26:18,542
- Is this about Love?
- No, it's about money,
737
00:26:18,582 --> 00:26:23,547
but I-I'm--I will pay her back,
uh, one way or the other.
738
00:26:23,587 --> 00:26:24,630
Who?
739
00:26:24,672 --> 00:26:25,965
Lucille 2--I'm gonna get her
740
00:26:26,007 --> 00:26:27,800
- against the wall.
- No, no, no, no, no,
741
00:26:27,842 --> 00:26:29,677
she cannot know about this wall.
742
00:26:29,719 --> 00:26:31,971
Fine, I'll get her up against
the top of the staircar.
743
00:26:32,013 --> 00:26:33,932
I don't care,
it's gonna happen, though.
744
00:26:33,973 --> 00:26:35,559
I am talking about Herbert Love.
745
00:26:35,599 --> 00:26:38,228
- Is he going to oppose the
building of the wall? - Oh, yes.
746
00:26:38,270 --> 00:26:39,771
I took care of that.
747
00:26:39,812 --> 00:26:42,065
He is going to announce that
in his speech tonight.
748
00:26:42,107 --> 00:26:43,066
That is great news.
749
00:26:43,108 --> 00:26:44,817
Listen, I-I-I have to go.
750
00:26:44,859 --> 00:26:47,779
I have to see if I can pass
this testosterone test.
751
00:26:47,820 --> 00:26:49,322
I do, too.
(chuckles)
752
00:26:49,364 --> 00:26:51,491
And, listen, not a word to...
753
00:26:51,533 --> 00:26:53,159
How dare you?
754
00:26:53,201 --> 00:26:56,620
Lucille 2.
755
00:26:56,662 --> 00:26:58,582
Did you think
I wouldn't find out?
756
00:26:58,622 --> 00:27:00,083
I was going to cut you in.
757
00:27:00,125 --> 00:27:01,334
I was trying to protect you
758
00:27:01,376 --> 00:27:03,295
so they wouldn't link you to it,
759
00:27:03,336 --> 00:27:05,880
but it turns out that we can't
afford to build it anyway.
760
00:27:05,922 --> 00:27:09,551
- Build what?
- The wall in Mexico, the, the high wall.
761
00:27:09,593 --> 00:27:11,886
- What were, what were you talking about?
- I was talking
762
00:27:11,928 --> 00:27:15,307
about you giving money
to Herbert Love in his campaign
763
00:27:15,348 --> 00:27:17,392
- against me.
- Oh, no, no,
764
00:27:17,434 --> 00:27:19,561
that was to get Love
to support the wall.
765
00:27:19,603 --> 00:27:21,854
Oh, I tell you, I've been
all over the place on this one.
766
00:27:21,896 --> 00:27:24,648
I can't be running a company
that's building a wall
767
00:27:24,690 --> 00:27:25,900
I campaigned against!
768
00:27:25,942 --> 00:27:28,570
Listen to me,
it's taken care of.
769
00:27:28,612 --> 00:27:29,653
I just ran into Michael.
770
00:27:29,695 --> 00:27:32,574
He's got Love against the wall.
771
00:27:32,616 --> 00:27:34,826
It's done, it's gonna be in
the speech tonight, it's over.
772
00:27:34,867 --> 00:27:36,411
It better be,
773
00:27:36,453 --> 00:27:39,289
or I'll talk about it
in my speech tonight.
774
00:27:39,331 --> 00:27:41,833
Now, I've got a staircar
to wave from.
775
00:27:41,874 --> 00:27:43,251
And I can't be seen with you.
776
00:27:43,293 --> 00:27:44,668
'Cause I'm fat.
777
00:27:44,710 --> 00:27:46,670
It's because I am fat.
778
00:27:46,712 --> 00:27:48,714
You think I'm a fat person.
779
00:27:48,756 --> 00:27:51,134
You are such a drama queen.
780
00:27:51,176 --> 00:27:52,344
NARRATOR:
George Sr. was worried.
781
00:27:52,385 --> 00:27:53,886
These fat arms.
782
00:27:53,928 --> 00:27:55,430
I don't understand this.
783
00:27:55,472 --> 00:27:58,266
And so, it was in
a state of agitation
784
00:27:58,308 --> 00:28:00,852
that George Sr. arrived
for his doctor's appointment.
785
00:28:00,893 --> 00:28:02,061
Excuse me, Dr. Norman?
786
00:28:02,103 --> 00:28:04,063
- You're mistaken.
- Dr. Norman,
787
00:28:04,105 --> 00:28:06,107
it's me, George Bluth.
788
00:28:06,149 --> 00:28:10,028
Oh, George, yes,
thank you for meeting me here.
789
00:28:10,069 --> 00:28:14,240
I like to do a little
housecleaning on the fourth.
790
00:28:14,282 --> 00:28:15,741
(indistinct radio transmission)
791
00:28:15,783 --> 00:28:17,410
Old quinceañera candles.
792
00:28:17,452 --> 00:28:21,498
I was wondering if you could
tell me my test results.
793
00:28:21,540 --> 00:28:22,915
Oh, yes, yes, uh, well,
794
00:28:22,957 --> 00:28:24,876
your testosterone numbers
are off the charts.
795
00:28:24,917 --> 00:28:26,085
(sighs)
796
00:28:26,127 --> 00:28:27,253
Below the charts,
under the charts.
797
00:28:27,295 --> 00:28:29,172
I don't know how to say that.
798
00:28:29,214 --> 00:28:30,882
You have almost
no testosterone at all.
799
00:28:30,923 --> 00:28:32,884
I don't know the exact numbers,
but it's somewhere
800
00:28:32,925 --> 00:28:34,386
in the baby range.
801
00:28:34,427 --> 00:28:36,804
On the plus side,
your estrogen levels are that
802
00:28:36,846 --> 00:28:39,683
of a very healthy woman
in the throes of her menses.
803
00:28:39,724 --> 00:28:41,560
May I see my results?
804
00:28:41,601 --> 00:28:43,353
Ah, I wish you'd asked me
about five minutes ago.
805
00:28:43,395 --> 00:28:44,604
I think I dumped it
with a pot pipe
806
00:28:44,646 --> 00:28:45,938
and a bottle
of cheetah sedative.
807
00:28:45,980 --> 00:28:47,940
Also, the people
at Orange County Imaging
808
00:28:47,982 --> 00:28:51,236
said that you were masturbating
in an MRI tube?
809
00:28:52,153 --> 00:28:53,530
- Oh, no.
- But, Doctor,
810
00:28:53,572 --> 00:28:54,698
you, you told me to.
811
00:28:54,739 --> 00:28:55,865
I did no such thing.
812
00:28:55,907 --> 00:28:56,824
Oh, no.
813
00:28:56,866 --> 00:28:59,827
No, no, you can't do that.
814
00:28:59,869 --> 00:29:01,538
That sounds like something
I would say
815
00:29:01,580 --> 00:29:03,081
when I had my thinking cap on.
816
00:29:03,122 --> 00:29:04,416
(laughs)
817
00:29:04,457 --> 00:29:06,876
You, sir, are a very funny lady.
818
00:29:09,504 --> 00:29:13,007
That's what they always say
to the unattractive one.
819
00:29:13,049 --> 00:29:15,968
NARRATOR: It was finally time
for Herbert Love
820
00:29:16,010 --> 00:29:19,972
to make his speech, when the
party was suddenly ransacked.
821
00:29:20,014 --> 00:29:21,641
Of course, it was Cinco,
822
00:29:21,683 --> 00:29:23,268
so it took a while
for anyone to notice.
823
00:29:23,309 --> 00:29:25,228
It appeared
the Hispanic community had had
824
00:29:25,270 --> 00:29:26,854
enough of Cinco de Cuatro.
825
00:29:26,896 --> 00:29:28,981
- Oh, God, the blowback.
- CROWD: Put up this wall!
826
00:29:29,023 --> 00:29:30,900
But the blowback created
a greater blowback
827
00:29:30,942 --> 00:29:33,570
as the crowd that had gathered
to hear Herbert Love speak
828
00:29:33,612 --> 00:29:34,820
was whipped into a frenzy.
829
00:29:34,862 --> 00:29:37,449
Put up this wall!
Put up this wall!
830
00:29:37,490 --> 00:29:40,159
And that's when George knew
he was in real trouble.
831
00:29:40,201 --> 00:29:41,953
Put up this wall!
832
00:29:41,994 --> 00:29:45,373
Fortunately,
he was able to find a disguise.
833
00:29:45,415 --> 00:29:46,458
(crowd cheering)
834
00:29:48,543 --> 00:29:49,919
Oh, God.
835
00:29:49,961 --> 00:29:53,047
- Unfortunately...
- This feels right.
836
00:29:58,094 --> 00:30:00,639
NARRATOR:
Lindsay surprises Michael
837
00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:02,724
after a long absence
from his life.
838
00:30:02,766 --> 00:30:04,768
Lindsay.
839
00:30:04,809 --> 00:30:06,394
It's been a long time.
840
00:30:06,436 --> 00:30:07,729
I know.
841
00:30:07,771 --> 00:30:10,732
Oh, this is
a little embarrassing.
842
00:30:10,774 --> 00:30:12,275
But I have been meaning
to get down there,
843
00:30:12,317 --> 00:30:14,152
- so let's just...
- You're right,
844
00:30:14,193 --> 00:30:17,155
I mean, it's not like we're
even technically related.
845
00:30:17,196 --> 00:30:21,159
- That's true.
- Okay, well, then, I'll start with a smear.
846
00:30:23,369 --> 00:30:25,163
NARRATOR: And George Sr. gets
more comfortable in hiding.
847
00:30:25,204 --> 00:30:26,623
GEORGE SR.:
Yes?
848
00:30:26,665 --> 00:30:28,541
Uh, Detective Smee,
Orange County Police.
849
00:30:28,583 --> 00:30:29,875
I need to speak with you.
850
00:30:29,917 --> 00:30:33,212
Lucille Austero went missing
last night.
851
00:30:33,254 --> 00:30:35,131
- You mind if we ask you a few questions?
- Oh...!
852
00:30:35,173 --> 00:30:37,008
I-I don't allow men
in my apartment
853
00:30:37,049 --> 00:30:38,894
without my husband present.
854
00:30:39,014 --> 00:30:47,698
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com