1 00:00:09,735 --> 00:00:12,613 NARRATOR: Even though it was only a hundred miles 2 00:00:12,654 --> 00:00:15,699 from her hometown of Newport Beach, 3 00:00:15,741 --> 00:00:19,203 the desert created a whole new value system for Lindsay Bluth. 4 00:00:19,245 --> 00:00:21,705 I'd give $20,000 for a lemonade right now. 5 00:00:21,747 --> 00:00:23,624 For the most part. 6 00:00:23,665 --> 00:00:26,501 It was here that she'd moved with her activist boyfriend... 7 00:00:26,543 --> 00:00:29,713 Marky! Mommy needs mescaline! 8 00:00:29,755 --> 00:00:30,756 ...and his mother. 9 00:00:30,798 --> 00:00:32,883 And tell your girlfriend DeBrie 10 00:00:32,925 --> 00:00:34,135 to shovel that ostrich crap! 11 00:00:34,176 --> 00:00:35,761 It's not DeBrie, Ma Bark. 12 00:00:35,803 --> 00:00:37,429 It's Lindsay. 13 00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:39,098 I just cut off my hair. 14 00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:40,390 I know who you are. 15 00:00:40,432 --> 00:00:41,683 Now start shoveling! 16 00:00:41,725 --> 00:00:43,644 God, you're lazier than Lindsay. 17 00:00:43,685 --> 00:00:44,645 (sighs) 18 00:00:44,686 --> 00:00:46,688 (gasps) Marky, hurry! 19 00:00:46,730 --> 00:00:48,565 - There's another dead iguana. - Oh. 20 00:00:48,607 --> 00:00:50,316 What does this mean? 21 00:00:50,358 --> 00:00:52,236 Probably those bastards next door. 22 00:00:52,278 --> 00:00:55,114 The bastards next door were actually a gathered group 23 00:00:55,156 --> 00:00:59,243 of CEOs who were attending a mid-summer sweat and squeeze. 24 00:00:59,285 --> 00:01:00,869 MARKY: They want us off their land. 25 00:01:00,911 --> 00:01:02,830 Probably so they can build a border wall. 26 00:01:02,871 --> 00:01:05,749 They just want to separate the whites from the browns. 27 00:01:05,791 --> 00:01:07,584 You really are color-blind. 28 00:01:07,626 --> 00:01:08,877 Face-blind. 29 00:01:08,919 --> 00:01:10,504 Fortunately, I can see color. 30 00:01:10,545 --> 00:01:13,381 That's how I can tell the browns are the Mexicans. 31 00:01:13,423 --> 00:01:16,010 Anyway, I thought I scared those bastards off 32 00:01:16,051 --> 00:01:17,219 by scaring their leader. 33 00:01:17,261 --> 00:01:19,054 The strong will become the weak. 34 00:01:19,096 --> 00:01:21,890 But I think I overdid it first on the maca, because I ended up 35 00:01:21,932 --> 00:01:23,517 seeing two of him. 36 00:01:23,558 --> 00:01:25,311 But to kill an innocent iguana, 37 00:01:25,351 --> 00:01:27,313 this beautiful creature of the desert... 38 00:01:27,353 --> 00:01:28,772 - (hissing) - That lizard bastard bit me! 39 00:01:28,814 --> 00:01:30,065 God! 40 00:01:30,107 --> 00:01:31,900 Who keeps numbing these desert animals? 41 00:01:31,942 --> 00:01:32,985 No, no, we'll kill it later. 42 00:01:33,027 --> 00:01:34,153 Mom, lizard bite! 43 00:01:34,195 --> 00:01:35,737 Put some rubbing mescaline on it! 44 00:01:35,779 --> 00:01:37,531 NARRATOR: Lindsay hated her new life, 45 00:01:37,572 --> 00:01:38,824 but even more, she hated herself 46 00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:40,575 for hating her new life. 47 00:01:40,617 --> 00:01:42,619 Marky, I just don't know how much more of this I can take. 48 00:01:42,661 --> 00:01:44,496 I'm surrounded by squalor and death, 49 00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:46,498 and I still can't be happy. 50 00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:48,083 Yeah, well, it's only gonna get worse, 51 00:01:48,125 --> 00:01:50,127 'cause they're chasing us off the land. 52 00:01:50,169 --> 00:01:51,419 I mean, where are we gonna go? 53 00:01:51,461 --> 00:01:52,504 Hey, new girl, I just heard 54 00:01:52,546 --> 00:01:54,173 about your mother's trial. 55 00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:55,757 She was sent away. 56 00:01:55,799 --> 00:01:58,677 Lindsay had missed her own mother's trial, 57 00:01:58,719 --> 00:02:01,263 and for that, she'd never be able to forgive her... 58 00:02:01,305 --> 00:02:03,098 Hey, I know a place that just opened up. 59 00:02:03,140 --> 00:02:04,391 ...herself. 60 00:02:04,432 --> 00:02:06,393 Now the story of a family 61 00:02:06,434 --> 00:02:08,562 whose future was abruptly canceled, 62 00:02:08,603 --> 00:02:11,065 and the one daughter who had no choice 63 00:02:11,106 --> 00:02:13,275 but to keep her life together. 64 00:02:17,487 --> 00:02:19,406 It's Lindsay's Arrested Development. 65 00:02:21,408 --> 00:02:23,077 - Lindsay wanted to move - That's great. 66 00:02:23,118 --> 00:02:25,120 to her mother's empty penthouse, 67 00:02:25,162 --> 00:02:26,372 - but Marky wouldn't think - You dropped your shovel. 68 00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:28,623 of leaving the old bird behind. 69 00:02:28,665 --> 00:02:29,875 (clucking) 70 00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,668 So it was a party of three 71 00:02:31,710 --> 00:02:34,963 that had to sneak into the Balboa Towers. 72 00:02:36,965 --> 00:02:38,508 Although Marky was having trouble 73 00:02:38,550 --> 00:02:40,344 - accepting what appeared to be - Come on, Cindy. 74 00:02:40,386 --> 00:02:41,595 a lavish lifestyle. 75 00:02:41,636 --> 00:02:43,013 - What do you think? - Ugh. 76 00:02:43,055 --> 00:02:44,848 Smells weird in here. What is that? 77 00:02:44,890 --> 00:02:47,268 I think it's just... not urine. 78 00:02:47,309 --> 00:02:48,810 And we're not moving in, 79 00:02:48,852 --> 00:02:51,397 we're occupying a space with central air. 80 00:02:51,437 --> 00:02:52,356 (Cindy squawks) 81 00:02:52,398 --> 00:02:53,357 Cindy? 82 00:02:53,399 --> 00:02:55,192 You okay? 83 00:02:55,234 --> 00:02:57,945 (chuckles): Look, Lindsay, Cindy already marked the master. 84 00:02:57,986 --> 00:02:58,946 Okay. 85 00:02:58,987 --> 00:03:01,156 This will be where she goes. 86 00:03:01,198 --> 00:03:02,783 So we're staying. 87 00:03:02,824 --> 00:03:06,703 And we will change the world and hold our heads high. 88 00:03:06,745 --> 00:03:11,083 And it might be nice to live like normal people for a change. 89 00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:13,668 Let's put some newspaper on these windows. 90 00:03:15,129 --> 00:03:17,381 (clucking) 91 00:03:17,423 --> 00:03:19,674 One year later, however, 92 00:03:19,716 --> 00:03:21,843 the only thing they'd actually changed was 93 00:03:21,885 --> 00:03:24,388 getting the "not urine" smell out of the penthouse. 94 00:03:24,430 --> 00:03:26,223 (clucking) 95 00:03:27,433 --> 00:03:28,558 You're looking at Lindsay. 96 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:29,601 Still Lindsay. 97 00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:31,061 Oh. Hey, Linds. 98 00:03:31,103 --> 00:03:32,980 - How was beg? - Beg was good. 99 00:03:33,021 --> 00:03:34,731 I found sometres lechescake. 100 00:03:34,773 --> 00:03:35,774 That's great. 101 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,484 Hey, did you clean up? 102 00:03:37,525 --> 00:03:40,028 No, no, I just cleared out a space to work on the Love bomb. 103 00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:42,990 Oh, okay. I'll, uh, change out of these filthy clothes 104 00:03:43,031 --> 00:03:44,450 and into some filthy lingerie. 105 00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:46,243 I don't think I washed it. 106 00:03:46,285 --> 00:03:49,621 No, I meant what we're gonna do to this guy-- Herbert Love. 107 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,206 Oh. 108 00:03:51,248 --> 00:03:53,167 Herbert Love was a very conservative candidate 109 00:03:53,208 --> 00:03:55,169 for a very conservative seat in the very conservative 110 00:03:55,210 --> 00:03:56,795 - House of Representatives. - Look, look, look. 111 00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:59,089 Am I guilty of anything? Yes. 112 00:03:59,131 --> 00:04:01,342 Of having a great sense of humor. 113 00:04:01,383 --> 00:04:03,885 But the two women who accused me of this crime 114 00:04:03,927 --> 00:04:06,054 donothave a great sense of humor. 115 00:04:06,096 --> 00:04:08,849 Look, in fact, I'll tell you the joke and let you be the judge... 116 00:04:08,890 --> 00:04:10,434 Although he was prone to 117 00:04:10,476 --> 00:04:12,144 the more than occasional harassment scandal. 118 00:04:12,186 --> 00:04:13,561 I forgot the joke. 119 00:04:13,603 --> 00:04:15,939 Oh, he's about to be harassed, all right. 120 00:04:15,981 --> 00:04:18,566 I'm gonna spray the bastards with ink and glitter. 121 00:04:18,608 --> 00:04:20,694 It'll be in their ears for weeks. 122 00:04:20,735 --> 00:04:22,737 Thing is, I can't find the glitter anywhere. 123 00:04:22,779 --> 00:04:24,156 Did you take the silver glitter? 124 00:04:24,198 --> 00:04:26,283 Nope. I mean, I'd say check the junk drawer, 125 00:04:26,325 --> 00:04:28,076 but I can't differentiate anymore. 126 00:04:28,118 --> 00:04:30,454 Oh, God, what is this? 127 00:04:30,496 --> 00:04:31,663 Oh. Okay, good. Perfect timing, 128 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,165 because this is where you come in. 129 00:04:33,207 --> 00:04:35,501 A lot of this has to do with ink compression, 130 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,127 oxygen capacity, expulsion pressures. 131 00:04:37,169 --> 00:04:40,214 But the point is, three days before the event, 132 00:04:40,255 --> 00:04:42,341 I'm gonna take the explosive and hide in the podium. 133 00:04:42,383 --> 00:04:44,259 On the night of the event, at exactly 7:30, 134 00:04:44,301 --> 00:04:45,802 I'm gonna pull the pin to the tank. 135 00:04:45,844 --> 00:04:47,429 Then you're gonna (knocking) knock on the podium door 136 00:04:47,471 --> 00:04:49,264 to let me know that the coast is clear. 137 00:04:49,306 --> 00:04:52,226 When Love steps up to the podium at exactly 8:00, blam! 138 00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:55,521 The podium doors burst open, and he and everyone will be... 139 00:04:55,562 --> 00:04:57,231 Blue in the face, yeah. 140 00:04:57,272 --> 00:04:59,024 That's better than what I had, actually. 141 00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:00,859 I was gonna say they'd be covered in ink and glitter. 142 00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:03,404 Or we can support Lucille 2, who he's running against. 143 00:05:03,445 --> 00:05:04,988 She's right across the hall. 144 00:05:05,030 --> 00:05:07,574 No, no! She's part of the problem. 145 00:05:07,615 --> 00:05:09,617 Wait, you haven't been going over there, by the way? 146 00:05:09,659 --> 00:05:11,412 - No one can know we're here. - Of course not. 147 00:05:11,453 --> 00:05:13,372 Does it look like I'm lying? 148 00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:15,457 It did. 149 00:05:15,499 --> 00:05:18,335 But not to a man with face-blindness. 150 00:05:18,377 --> 00:05:20,254 Yeah, no, I guess not. 151 00:05:20,295 --> 00:05:22,005 Because Lindsay could only spend 152 00:05:22,047 --> 00:05:24,049 so many hours with a shrill, feathered creature... 153 00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:25,092 (Lucille 2 squawks) 154 00:05:25,133 --> 00:05:26,510 ...and needed to get away. 155 00:05:26,552 --> 00:05:28,554 You look marvelous in that! 156 00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:29,888 Here, try this on. 157 00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:31,473 I can't believe how much I've missed 158 00:05:31,515 --> 00:05:33,141 the feel of anything that isn't hemp. 159 00:05:33,183 --> 00:05:34,184 And try this on. 160 00:05:34,226 --> 00:05:35,601 Isn't that funny? 161 00:05:35,643 --> 00:05:37,354 I used to wear that with the Captain. 162 00:05:37,396 --> 00:05:38,355 And I was... 163 00:05:38,397 --> 00:05:39,731 Tennille? 164 00:05:39,773 --> 00:05:41,900 And not make contact, yes! 165 00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:44,278 What am I gonna do, cut it down for my foster child? 166 00:05:44,319 --> 00:05:46,071 That is what she wanted to do, 167 00:05:46,113 --> 00:05:49,615 until he threatened to call Social Services. 168 00:05:49,657 --> 00:05:51,617 Oh, look what I made you. 169 00:05:51,659 --> 00:05:53,287 Oh! I love it! 170 00:05:53,328 --> 00:05:55,163 It's glittery! 171 00:05:55,205 --> 00:05:58,624 Lindsay was no stranger to making campaign posters, 172 00:05:58,666 --> 00:06:01,211 having made several in her seventh grade 173 00:06:01,253 --> 00:06:04,131 class president campaign against Sally Sitwell. 174 00:06:04,172 --> 00:06:06,716 Sally ultimately proved successful 175 00:06:06,758 --> 00:06:09,261 with a more fact-based campaign. 176 00:06:09,303 --> 00:06:10,762 A couple of tiny notes, hon. 177 00:06:10,804 --> 00:06:13,348 There are two S's in "congress." 178 00:06:13,390 --> 00:06:15,142 And I just call myself Lucille... 179 00:06:15,183 --> 00:06:16,893 Lucille 1. I'm so sorry. 180 00:06:16,935 --> 00:06:18,145 No. 181 00:06:18,186 --> 00:06:19,229 Just Lucille. 182 00:06:19,271 --> 00:06:20,772 But I love it! 183 00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:23,317 Oh, I wish you'd officially work for my campaign. 184 00:06:23,358 --> 00:06:24,568 We could make such a difference. 185 00:06:24,610 --> 00:06:26,736 Well, Marky says that's not 186 00:06:26,778 --> 00:06:28,155 the way we should make change. 187 00:06:28,196 --> 00:06:29,655 Oh, speaking of, do you mind 188 00:06:29,697 --> 00:06:31,699 if I go through your couch cushions? 189 00:06:31,741 --> 00:06:34,744 Oh, honey, I wish you'd take the rest of thistres lechescake. 190 00:06:34,786 --> 00:06:37,080 It's from a dear Hispanic supporter. 191 00:06:37,122 --> 00:06:40,167 And I'll never get it into the bay in one piece. 192 00:06:40,208 --> 00:06:42,544 Honestly, Lucille 2, you've been like a mother to me. 193 00:06:42,586 --> 00:06:44,045 Aw. 194 00:06:44,087 --> 00:06:46,965 Except kind and loving and willing to let me eat. 195 00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:49,259 It just blows me away. 196 00:06:49,301 --> 00:06:50,885 Lindsay knew she had to keep 197 00:06:50,927 --> 00:06:53,180 her secret life of luxury hidden... 198 00:06:53,221 --> 00:06:54,515 You're looking at Lindsay. 199 00:06:54,556 --> 00:06:55,681 Still Lindsay. 200 00:06:55,723 --> 00:06:57,142 ...from a boyfriend that was 201 00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,977 preparing to squat in a podium 202 00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:00,770 for three days with a paint bomb. 203 00:07:00,812 --> 00:07:02,730 But, Marky, I mean, won't you go crazy in there? 204 00:07:02,772 --> 00:07:04,774 Oh, no, that's nothing. I once did a week and a half 205 00:07:04,816 --> 00:07:06,276 in an oil drum just to throw a pie 206 00:07:06,318 --> 00:07:07,361 at Arnold Schwarzenegger. (chuckles) 207 00:07:07,402 --> 00:07:08,778 I never heard about that. 208 00:07:08,820 --> 00:07:10,780 Oh, yeah, well, the press tried to spin it as 209 00:07:10,822 --> 00:07:13,116 "Hippie tries to play pie-tin Frisbee with the governor," 210 00:07:13,158 --> 00:07:15,118 but... this time, I'm eating beforehand. 211 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:17,120 Yeah, I-I see that. 212 00:07:17,162 --> 00:07:18,872 Hey, can I get you a fork? 213 00:07:18,913 --> 00:07:22,167 'Cause that's my brother whose face you're licking. 214 00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,336 That's a face? 215 00:07:24,378 --> 00:07:26,547 Everything I do is wrong. 216 00:07:26,588 --> 00:07:27,797 - (sighs) - I knew you wouldn't be 217 00:07:27,839 --> 00:07:28,840 on board with this, Lindsay. 218 00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:29,924 I'm sorry to say this, 219 00:07:29,966 --> 00:07:31,426 but you are losing your passion. 220 00:07:31,468 --> 00:07:33,679 What passion? You don't even look at me. 221 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,597 I don't know if I've said this before-- 222 00:07:35,639 --> 00:07:37,057 it's not important or anything-- 223 00:07:37,098 --> 00:07:38,684 but I'm really, really pretty. 224 00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:40,310 I'm the straightest guy you know! 225 00:07:40,352 --> 00:07:41,645 Why does every man feel like 226 00:07:41,687 --> 00:07:43,146 they have to say that to me? 227 00:07:43,188 --> 00:07:45,357 - (clucking) - Quiet! Cindy's in heat. 228 00:07:45,399 --> 00:07:47,192 You know how much she hates it when we argue. 229 00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:48,985 (whispering): Now listen to me. This protest of mine 230 00:07:49,027 --> 00:07:51,321 - can really make a difference. - Yeah, it's gonna land you 231 00:07:51,363 --> 00:07:52,573 - in jail, Marky. - Oh, there it is. 232 00:07:52,614 --> 00:07:53,865 Oh, yeah, so that's-- oh, yeah. 233 00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:55,450 You know what, you are just as selfish 234 00:07:55,492 --> 00:07:56,993 - and money-hungry as you ever were. -No, I'm... 235 00:07:57,035 --> 00:07:58,870 - Yes, you are. - That's not true. 236 00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:00,788 Ooh, a Neiman's catalog. 237 00:08:00,830 --> 00:08:04,376 But it was what she found stuck inside the catalog 238 00:08:04,418 --> 00:08:05,919 that got her attention. 239 00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:07,629 And that's when she found the mother lode. 240 00:08:07,671 --> 00:08:10,798 "From Gangie 4: Facelift." 241 00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:13,427 What a load of... 242 00:08:13,468 --> 00:08:15,011 Mother. 243 00:08:15,053 --> 00:08:17,805 And this time, she did make a court appearance. 244 00:08:17,847 --> 00:08:20,767 Cheryl, you've got no backhand! 245 00:08:20,808 --> 00:08:22,269 I'm working the whole court, 246 00:08:22,310 --> 00:08:25,439 and you keep hitting the balls (bleep) high. 247 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:28,900 Oh, great, looks like we've got another high-end hooker in here. 248 00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:30,318 Oh, thank you, Mother. 249 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,529 LUCILLE: So, let's cut to the chase. 250 00:08:32,571 --> 00:08:36,157 I want to talk to you about a check for plastic surgery. 251 00:08:36,199 --> 00:08:38,243 I already wrote you a check for that. 252 00:08:38,285 --> 00:08:40,245 NARRATOR: Lucille had, back when Lindsay thought 253 00:08:40,287 --> 00:08:42,872 - she was only 12 years old. - New nose. 254 00:08:42,914 --> 00:08:45,792 Worrying it would hurt her daughter's feelings... 255 00:08:45,833 --> 00:08:47,210 Put a "Y" on there. 256 00:08:47,252 --> 00:08:49,212 ...she put a fun spin on it. 257 00:08:49,254 --> 00:08:50,838 - "Nosy." - LUCILLE: And you should be 258 00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:52,215 thanking me for that. 259 00:08:52,257 --> 00:08:53,967 You looked like a can opener. 260 00:08:54,008 --> 00:08:56,219 No, a check for my daughter. 261 00:08:56,261 --> 00:08:57,429 She's gorgeous. 262 00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:59,139 And I love her just the way she is. 263 00:08:59,180 --> 00:09:01,141 When was the last time you saw her? 264 00:09:01,182 --> 00:09:04,269 She's been living with her father the past year, 265 00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:08,440 and it's been... really hard. 266 00:09:08,482 --> 00:09:11,652 I'll be out on parole by the time you work up a tear. 267 00:09:11,693 --> 00:09:14,613 What makes you think I wrote a check to your daughter, nosy? 268 00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:15,989 It came to the penthouse. 269 00:09:16,030 --> 00:09:17,658 Well, well. 270 00:09:17,699 --> 00:09:20,076 Little Miss Lives-Off-the-Land is living in my penthouse. 271 00:09:20,118 --> 00:09:23,371 Okay, so you figured it out, Gene Parmesan. 272 00:09:23,413 --> 00:09:27,709 Just goes to show, the apple does not far from the tree fall. 273 00:09:27,751 --> 00:09:30,086 I am like you nothing. 274 00:09:30,128 --> 00:09:32,339 You're not even my real mother. 275 00:09:32,380 --> 00:09:33,965 I am a political activist. 276 00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:37,344 Oh, you're a lot more like me than you know, sister. 277 00:09:37,385 --> 00:09:39,596 Except I can back up my bad choices. 278 00:09:39,638 --> 00:09:41,431 I'm doing hard time. 279 00:09:41,473 --> 00:09:43,809 Your 3:00 p.m. hot rock massage is open. 280 00:09:43,850 --> 00:09:45,644 Thanks for coming, sweetheart. 281 00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,604 - Mm. - NARRATOR: But Lindsay wanted 282 00:09:47,646 --> 00:09:49,815 to prove that she wasn't like her so-called mother. 283 00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:51,692 (sighs) 284 00:09:51,733 --> 00:09:54,027 And that's why she did this. 285 00:09:55,236 --> 00:09:56,738 I'm in. 286 00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:58,824 Let's bomb the bastard. 287 00:10:00,158 --> 00:10:01,576 It's Lindsay. 288 00:10:01,618 --> 00:10:04,120 Oh, yes! (laughs): Yeah! 289 00:10:07,123 --> 00:10:09,292 NARRATOR: Lindsay and her boyfriend Marky arrived in-- 290 00:10:09,334 --> 00:10:11,837 get this-- Beverly Hills to prepare 291 00:10:11,878 --> 00:10:14,381 for their act of glittery social protest. 292 00:10:14,422 --> 00:10:17,384 But Lindsay was having second thoughts. 293 00:10:17,425 --> 00:10:19,469 Marky, look, um, 294 00:10:19,511 --> 00:10:22,514 I have this check that my mother wrote for my daughter. 295 00:10:22,556 --> 00:10:25,308 It can buy us a lot of leaflets against Love. 296 00:10:25,350 --> 00:10:27,227 And also a lot of Nature's Miracle. 297 00:10:27,268 --> 00:10:29,771 You know, there's a huge sale going on right now at Petco... 298 00:10:29,813 --> 00:10:31,314 No, never! Rip it up! No money! 299 00:10:31,356 --> 00:10:33,941 And don't worry, I've thought of everything. 300 00:10:33,983 --> 00:10:35,151 He had. 301 00:10:35,193 --> 00:10:36,403 Except for someone to watch Cindy. 302 00:10:36,444 --> 00:10:38,238 (laughs): Oh, but she's locked in. 303 00:10:38,279 --> 00:10:39,447 What's the worst that can happen? 304 00:10:39,489 --> 00:10:41,282 (screaming, squawking) 305 00:10:43,326 --> 00:10:44,952 - Good luck. - Thanks. 306 00:10:44,994 --> 00:10:46,705 Ah! What a great day to step out 307 00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:48,915 onto an over-irrigated golf course and play a game 308 00:10:48,956 --> 00:10:52,377 that wastes vast acres of usable, farm-able land. 309 00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:54,379 And after a few nights in the trailer, 310 00:10:54,421 --> 00:10:58,341 Lindsay showed up in Lucille 2's Tennille wig 311 00:10:58,383 --> 00:11:00,677 to be ready to release Marky from the podium 312 00:11:00,719 --> 00:11:02,721 at the appointed time, 313 00:11:02,763 --> 00:11:05,139 and then stroll out together in disguise. 314 00:11:05,181 --> 00:11:07,267 I think that's what this part refers to 315 00:11:07,308 --> 00:11:08,727 back when the disguise was 316 00:11:08,769 --> 00:11:10,771 going to be a two-part horse costume. 317 00:11:10,812 --> 00:11:14,148 But soon, she ran into a father she hadn't seen in over a year. 318 00:11:14,190 --> 00:11:17,819 Lindsay, I forgot, you dyed your hair. 319 00:11:17,861 --> 00:11:19,237 Do you have any money? 320 00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:20,363 And that's how Lindsay 321 00:11:20,405 --> 00:11:22,783 parted with the check for Maeby 322 00:11:22,824 --> 00:11:25,577 that Marky had told her to rip up. 323 00:11:25,619 --> 00:11:27,120 And it was then she ran into a daughter... 324 00:11:27,161 --> 00:11:28,747 Maeby. 325 00:11:28,789 --> 00:11:30,457 ...whose $50,000 check she'd just given away... 326 00:11:30,498 --> 00:11:31,750 Mom. 327 00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,167 ...stealing some coconut shrimp. 328 00:11:33,209 --> 00:11:34,377 Of course you're here. 329 00:11:34,419 --> 00:11:36,129 I should've known you'd be 330 00:11:36,170 --> 00:11:38,005 - supporting this right-wing, dangerous crackpot. -No, no. 331 00:11:38,047 --> 00:11:40,634 I am here undercover with my boyfriend. 332 00:11:40,675 --> 00:11:42,552 We are gonna take down Love 333 00:11:42,594 --> 00:11:46,180 with a random act of senseless nonviolence. 334 00:11:46,222 --> 00:11:48,224 Maeby felt a foreign feeling. 335 00:11:48,266 --> 00:11:50,310 I actually respect that. 336 00:11:50,351 --> 00:11:51,937 - Thank you, Maeby. - Which is why, 337 00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:54,147 for the first time in her adult life... 338 00:11:54,188 --> 00:11:55,732 So what are you doing here? 339 00:11:55,774 --> 00:11:58,192 ...Maeby was totally honest with her mother. 340 00:11:58,234 --> 00:12:00,236 I'm getting a lifetime achievement award 341 00:12:00,278 --> 00:12:02,489 for my work in the entertainment business. 342 00:12:02,530 --> 00:12:03,989 I tried. 343 00:12:04,031 --> 00:12:05,700 Tell your therapist I tried. 344 00:12:05,742 --> 00:12:08,244 NARRATOR: But realizing she was still too early 345 00:12:08,286 --> 00:12:10,163 to let Marky out of the podium, 346 00:12:10,204 --> 00:12:12,457 Lindsay headed to the bar, 347 00:12:12,499 --> 00:12:14,417 and that's when she met the man she was there to sabotage... 348 00:12:14,459 --> 00:12:15,877 Is it just me, 349 00:12:15,919 --> 00:12:18,672 or are we the only two people who don't fit in 350 00:12:18,713 --> 00:12:21,925 with all these Orange County phonies? 351 00:12:21,967 --> 00:12:23,844 (sighs) 352 00:12:23,885 --> 00:12:25,553 ...and had no idea who he was. 353 00:12:25,595 --> 00:12:27,722 They are a bunch of phonies. 354 00:12:27,764 --> 00:12:29,056 I usually don't even go to these things. 355 00:12:29,098 --> 00:12:30,266 NARRATOR: And perhaps it was 356 00:12:30,308 --> 00:12:31,893 because he reminded her so much 357 00:12:31,935 --> 00:12:34,479 of Tobias when they first started dating, 358 00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:36,189 but Lindsay flirted back. 359 00:12:36,230 --> 00:12:37,649 What's your name, princess? 360 00:12:37,691 --> 00:12:40,151 Cindy Featherbottom. 361 00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:42,529 Of the Laguna Beach Featherbottoms? 362 00:12:42,570 --> 00:12:44,364 Are you trying to find out where I live? 363 00:12:44,405 --> 00:12:46,950 - And your favorite kind of jewelry. - (both laugh) 364 00:12:46,992 --> 00:12:48,785 NARRATOR: Lindsay hadn't heard the word "jewelry" 365 00:12:48,827 --> 00:12:51,162 in a long time but tried to stay strong. 366 00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:54,123 How do I know you're not one of these phonies? 367 00:12:54,165 --> 00:12:58,252 The only phony I'm interested in is your phony number. 368 00:12:58,294 --> 00:13:00,254 NARRATOR: And like Cinderella at the ball, 369 00:13:00,296 --> 00:13:02,799 Lindsay really felt like a princess for a change... 370 00:13:02,841 --> 00:13:04,009 Okay. 371 00:13:04,049 --> 00:13:05,760 ...but also like Cinderella, 372 00:13:05,802 --> 00:13:08,304 - she lost track of the time... - It's, uh, 714... -Mm-hmm. 373 00:13:08,346 --> 00:13:09,597 (explosion) 374 00:13:09,639 --> 00:13:11,182 (Marky screams) 375 00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,434 - (Lindsay sighing) - ...and had forgotten 376 00:13:13,476 --> 00:13:16,145 to release Marky from the podium, 377 00:13:16,187 --> 00:13:18,063 and that's when she was struck 378 00:13:18,105 --> 00:13:19,315 - with an eerie sense... - Right this way, sir, 379 00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:21,066 - right this way. - ...of déjà vu. 380 00:13:21,108 --> 00:13:22,151 Lindsay. 381 00:13:22,193 --> 00:13:25,446 Oh, God, he blued himself. 382 00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:30,785 NARRATOR: Lindsay's attempt to create a disaster 383 00:13:30,827 --> 00:13:33,120 for Herbert Love was a complete disaster, 384 00:13:33,162 --> 00:13:35,957 and as she tried to slip away without drawing attention 385 00:13:35,999 --> 00:13:37,959 to herself, she was once again approached... 386 00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:39,794 - Cindy Featherbottom.-... by the man whose name she never got. 387 00:13:39,836 --> 00:13:41,212 Here's my private number. 388 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:42,547 Give me a call; perhaps we can engage 389 00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:45,216 - in some sexual congress. - Although that's 390 00:13:45,258 --> 00:13:47,176 a total giveaway, right? 391 00:13:47,218 --> 00:13:49,679 What a wonderful sense of humor. 392 00:13:49,721 --> 00:13:51,723 I'd like that very much. 393 00:13:51,765 --> 00:13:53,516 Sir, the press awaits. 394 00:13:53,558 --> 00:13:54,726 Now, I don't know what this nut was protesting tonight. 395 00:13:54,768 --> 00:13:56,101 I thought you were supposed to be sticking it 396 00:13:56,143 --> 00:13:57,896 to the man, not the other way around. 397 00:13:57,938 --> 00:13:59,272 Maeby. 398 00:13:59,313 --> 00:14:00,774 You think he likes me that way? 399 00:14:00,815 --> 00:14:03,192 No, Mom, that's Herbert Love, 400 00:14:03,234 --> 00:14:04,235 the man you're here to protest. 401 00:14:04,277 --> 00:14:05,445 And I hear the guy with the bomb 402 00:14:05,486 --> 00:14:06,613 snuck up here from Mexico. 403 00:14:06,654 --> 00:14:07,655 That's why I say, 404 00:14:07,697 --> 00:14:10,992 we have got to build a wall 405 00:14:11,034 --> 00:14:13,118 - between us and Mexico. - Oh, no. 406 00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:14,996 H-How could you not recognize him? 407 00:14:15,038 --> 00:14:17,248 NARRATOR: In fairness to Lindsay, it was Marky's 408 00:14:17,290 --> 00:14:20,167 face-blindness that led him to mistake this photo 409 00:14:20,209 --> 00:14:21,419 for the candidate. 410 00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:23,004 Why Lindsay failed to recognize 411 00:14:23,046 --> 00:14:26,883 musical icon Nat King Cole cannot be explained. 412 00:14:26,925 --> 00:14:28,927 But he's so modern looking. 413 00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:30,678 I mean, obviously I didn't know it was the man 414 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,764 whose politics I'm here to protest. 415 00:14:32,806 --> 00:14:33,932 I guess I was just having fun, 416 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,642 pretending I had my old life back. 417 00:14:35,683 --> 00:14:37,393 Well, we'll just be friends, and I'm gonna keep it 418 00:14:37,435 --> 00:14:39,980 light and fun with him and not talk politics at all. 419 00:14:40,021 --> 00:14:42,065 I can't believe you're such a sellout. 420 00:14:42,107 --> 00:14:44,734 - (sighs) -Are you really going to whore yourself out like that? 421 00:14:44,776 --> 00:14:46,861 - I am not a whore. - Yeah, you're a whore. 422 00:14:46,903 --> 00:14:47,779 I am not a whore. 423 00:14:47,821 --> 00:14:49,280 Look, I am still committed to my ideals 424 00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:51,491 and to my Marky. 425 00:14:51,532 --> 00:14:52,951 MARKY: Lindsay! 426 00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,577 Lindsay, Lindsay! 427 00:14:54,619 --> 00:14:55,954 Well, you certainly have a type. 428 00:14:55,996 --> 00:14:57,580 Lindsay? Have you seen a woman named Lindsay? 429 00:14:57,622 --> 00:14:58,832 If you see a woman named Lindsay, 430 00:14:58,873 --> 00:15:01,250 tell her to bail me out. 431 00:15:01,292 --> 00:15:03,086 (gravelly): I'll do my best, sir. 432 00:15:03,128 --> 00:15:04,170 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 433 00:15:04,211 --> 00:15:05,713 (gravelly): Taxi. 434 00:15:05,755 --> 00:15:07,214 Tell Lindsay to feed Cindy. 435 00:15:07,256 --> 00:15:08,424 - She thinks she's... - (in normal voice): Taxi. 436 00:15:08,466 --> 00:15:10,093 (elevator bell dings) 437 00:15:10,135 --> 00:15:13,054 NARRATOR: Lindsay was as blue as one of her men 438 00:15:13,096 --> 00:15:15,348 when she returned to the penthouse, 439 00:15:15,389 --> 00:15:18,559 and that's when she decided to get half in the bag. 440 00:15:18,601 --> 00:15:22,730 - But even though she felt bad...- (elevator bell dings) 441 00:15:22,772 --> 00:15:25,358 ...she was at least able to turn a man's head... 442 00:15:25,399 --> 00:15:27,027 Gentlemen, start your engines. 443 00:15:27,068 --> 00:15:28,736 ...although, perhaps had his head not turned... 444 00:15:28,778 --> 00:15:30,321 - Buster. - ...he would have seen 445 00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:31,656 - the ostrich warning on the door.-No, Gob. 446 00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:32,949 - (ostrich screeches) - Oh! 447 00:15:32,991 --> 00:15:34,575 NARRATOR: After another night 448 00:15:34,617 --> 00:15:37,704 in the trailer, Lindsay went to the model home 449 00:15:37,745 --> 00:15:39,372 to give a daughter who called her a whore 450 00:15:39,413 --> 00:15:40,832 a piece of her mind. 451 00:15:40,874 --> 00:15:43,126 Hi, sweetie. 452 00:15:43,168 --> 00:15:45,294 Of course, she needed a place to stay, so she couldn't 453 00:15:45,336 --> 00:15:47,714 - just jump right in.-I thought I'd surprise you with a visit. 454 00:15:47,755 --> 00:15:49,924 Yeah, well, the bags are certainly a surprise. 455 00:15:49,966 --> 00:15:51,258 You're not thinking of moving in, are you? 456 00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:53,260 - What? No. - Yeah, because 457 00:15:53,302 --> 00:15:54,554 I don't think Dad would be cool with it. 458 00:15:54,595 --> 00:15:56,014 - No, of course not. - Yeah. 459 00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:59,059 - Is he in? - No. 460 00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:01,978 (sighs) Oh, what happened there? 461 00:16:02,020 --> 00:16:04,564 Kids or people who like kids. 462 00:16:04,605 --> 00:16:06,024 So, where's Marky? 463 00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:09,861 God, Marky will be in jail for quite a while. 464 00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:11,529 NARRATOR: She actually had just come from visiting him. 465 00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:14,824 So it, uh, turns out the glitter was shrapnel grade. 466 00:16:14,866 --> 00:16:16,868 They're upping my charges 467 00:16:16,910 --> 00:16:20,205 from prank bomb to non-Arab terrorism. 468 00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:21,664 This is where you letting me out 469 00:16:21,706 --> 00:16:22,790 of the podium would have really helped. 470 00:16:22,832 --> 00:16:24,209 Why didn't you just come out? 471 00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:26,169 I couldn't do it; someone locked me in. 472 00:16:26,211 --> 00:16:27,587 NARRATOR: In fact, it was Gob, 473 00:16:27,628 --> 00:16:30,339 thinking he was trapping the magician Tony Wonder 474 00:16:30,381 --> 00:16:31,716 into one of his illusions. 475 00:16:31,758 --> 00:16:33,300 GOB: Hey, Mark, you guys want to see 476 00:16:33,342 --> 00:16:34,594 a real failed magician, you might want 477 00:16:34,635 --> 00:16:35,678 to get down to the Opies tonight. 478 00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:37,222 It's going to be hysterical. 479 00:16:37,263 --> 00:16:38,639 MARKY: I need you to bail me out, Lindsay. 480 00:16:38,681 --> 00:16:40,307 - I need you to use that check. - Oh, I... 481 00:16:40,349 --> 00:16:41,517 I don't have that check anymore. 482 00:16:41,559 --> 00:16:43,644 - What? - You told me to rip it up. 483 00:16:43,686 --> 00:16:45,063 I thought you said you didn't believe in money. 484 00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:46,480 I didn't until I realized what it could keep me from. 485 00:16:46,522 --> 00:16:48,024 Jail's a lot like Swappigans, 486 00:16:48,066 --> 00:16:50,359 except there's only one thing to swap. 487 00:16:50,401 --> 00:16:51,652 It's scary. 488 00:16:51,694 --> 00:16:52,946 - GUARD: Anus tart. - TOBIAS: Yep, 489 00:16:52,987 --> 00:16:55,156 - that's me. -MARKY: Oh, God, that could have been me. 490 00:16:55,198 --> 00:16:57,242 Lindsay, listen to me-- I'm scared. 491 00:16:57,283 --> 00:16:58,451 I'm scared, I'm scared, I'm scared. 492 00:16:58,492 --> 00:17:00,161 - I'm really scared. - GUARD: No touching. 493 00:17:00,203 --> 00:17:01,495 LINDSAY: Actually it's kind of nice 494 00:17:01,537 --> 00:17:03,206 to have a little me time. 495 00:17:03,248 --> 00:17:05,250 Oh, of course, that's why you were giving Herbert Love 496 00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:07,418 a little you time last night. 497 00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,837 You were flirting with him to get Marky out of jail. 498 00:17:09,879 --> 00:17:11,380 Well, yeah, that is 499 00:17:11,422 --> 00:17:15,718 what I should have been do-- what I did, yeah, yeah. 500 00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:17,887 That's exactly what I should have and did do. 501 00:17:17,929 --> 00:17:21,015 And it's not that bad an idea, actually. 502 00:17:21,057 --> 00:17:22,892 You could get him to do anything 'cause he's probably 503 00:17:22,934 --> 00:17:25,186 just one of those shallow guys who's only interested in looks. 504 00:17:25,228 --> 00:17:26,854 I miss that. 505 00:17:26,896 --> 00:17:28,106 Missed that. 506 00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:29,440 Yeah, you know, maybe it would be 507 00:17:29,482 --> 00:17:31,776 a good idea if I got in touch with him. 508 00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:34,946 I mean, he did give me his card. 509 00:17:34,988 --> 00:17:36,948 Although I could never call him. 510 00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:38,783 I could call him for you 511 00:17:38,825 --> 00:17:41,035 and I'll tell him it has to be tonight. 512 00:17:41,077 --> 00:17:42,954 Well, the sooner the better. 513 00:17:42,996 --> 00:17:44,122 Got to get Marky out of jail. 514 00:17:44,164 --> 00:17:46,207 That's why the sooner the better. 515 00:17:46,249 --> 00:17:48,168 NARRATOR: So Maeby arranged for a meeting 516 00:17:48,209 --> 00:17:50,878 that evening at Hollywood's exclusive Ealing Club 517 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,922 between Herbert Love and Cindy Featherbottom. 518 00:17:52,964 --> 00:17:55,175 I like this place. 519 00:17:55,216 --> 00:17:57,718 No cameras, no phones. 520 00:17:57,760 --> 00:17:59,053 Everyone's cool. 521 00:17:59,095 --> 00:18:01,222 Well, thank you for being willing to meet. 522 00:18:01,264 --> 00:18:02,723 Meet, greet. 523 00:18:02,765 --> 00:18:04,309 Sure are sweet. 524 00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:05,392 What a treat. 525 00:18:05,434 --> 00:18:07,103 What did the lamb say? 526 00:18:07,145 --> 00:18:09,189 Baa? 527 00:18:09,230 --> 00:18:10,190 Bleat. 528 00:18:10,231 --> 00:18:11,565 Ah, yes, of course. 529 00:18:11,607 --> 00:18:12,984 I was just wondering, 530 00:18:13,026 --> 00:18:15,111 is anything really bad going to happen 531 00:18:15,153 --> 00:18:17,488 to that blue guy from the rally? 532 00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:18,531 Do you want to press charges? 533 00:18:18,572 --> 00:18:20,200 Who can think of Little Boy Blue 534 00:18:20,241 --> 00:18:23,203 - when I've got this beautiful face in front of me? -Oh. 535 00:18:23,244 --> 00:18:26,122 Thanks, haven't heard that in a long time. 536 00:18:26,164 --> 00:18:28,499 Your cheekbones are even higher than my approval rating. 537 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,960 Your brain can register my cheekbones? 538 00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:32,586 I'll register 'em to vote. 539 00:18:32,628 --> 00:18:35,048 - (laughs) -Your lips are like a Murphy bed. 540 00:18:35,089 --> 00:18:36,216 They don't take up much space, 541 00:18:36,257 --> 00:18:38,301 but they are there when you need 'em. 542 00:18:38,343 --> 00:18:42,347 Okay, you are a poet. 543 00:18:42,388 --> 00:18:45,474 You're wonderful. 544 00:18:45,516 --> 00:18:47,434 But, um, yeah, I-I do want to talk 545 00:18:47,476 --> 00:18:49,187 to you about a couple of issues. 546 00:18:49,229 --> 00:18:53,607 Can we just have one night where we don't talk about politics? 547 00:18:53,649 --> 00:18:56,443 Yes, yes, just one night. 548 00:18:56,485 --> 00:18:58,112 - We deserve it. - Let's get a room. 549 00:18:58,154 --> 00:18:59,322 Yes-- no. 550 00:18:59,364 --> 00:19:00,323 What? 551 00:19:00,365 --> 00:19:02,408 Uh, I... okay. 552 00:19:02,449 --> 00:19:04,035 We can talk in a room, I guess. 553 00:19:04,077 --> 00:19:05,828 (elevator bell dings) 554 00:19:05,870 --> 00:19:08,039 NARRATOR: And later, down in the lobby, as Herbert 555 00:19:08,081 --> 00:19:09,832 went off to do some business... 556 00:19:09,874 --> 00:19:11,458 You hang tight. 557 00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:14,212 I'm going to meet with some of my, uh, "constititutes." 558 00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,504 ...Lindsay ran into her brother Michael. 559 00:19:15,546 --> 00:19:17,257 - Hi-lo. - Michael? 560 00:19:17,298 --> 00:19:18,341 Hi. 561 00:19:18,383 --> 00:19:19,926 - How are you? - Oh, good, good. 562 00:19:19,967 --> 00:19:21,261 I almost didn't recognize you. 563 00:19:21,302 --> 00:19:22,845 - It's my hair. - That's some of it, 564 00:19:22,887 --> 00:19:24,597 but it's also, you're with a guy 565 00:19:24,638 --> 00:19:26,891 that pretty much represents everything you pretend to hate. 566 00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:28,601 - Was that Herbert Love? - Great, now I remember 567 00:19:28,642 --> 00:19:30,186 why we fell out of touch. 568 00:19:30,228 --> 00:19:32,272 No, Lindsay, I'm kidding, kidding, kidding, I'm so sorry. 569 00:19:32,313 --> 00:19:33,731 I'm sure that you're having a great influence 570 00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:35,358 on him, you know. 571 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:36,943 (chuckling): Thanks. 572 00:19:36,984 --> 00:19:39,737 But if you really want to blow him-- away, 573 00:19:39,779 --> 00:19:43,449 you know the wall issue that everyone is talking about? 574 00:19:43,490 --> 00:19:45,326 The wall between Mexico and the U.S.? 575 00:19:45,368 --> 00:19:46,702 Tell him to take it down? 576 00:19:46,744 --> 00:19:49,122 Or just not to put it up. No wall yet. 577 00:19:49,163 --> 00:19:51,207 Oh, no, there's no-- I knew that, yeah. 578 00:19:51,249 --> 00:19:53,000 If you could get him 579 00:19:53,042 --> 00:19:55,128 against the wall, Lindsay... 580 00:19:55,169 --> 00:19:57,463 Well, I had no idea you were this socially conscious. 581 00:19:57,504 --> 00:19:59,299 NARRATOR: He wasn't. 582 00:19:59,340 --> 00:20:01,675 In fact, he was just using her Love connection 583 00:20:01,717 --> 00:20:04,470 to make good on a deal he'd struck 584 00:20:04,511 --> 00:20:06,597 to get his father's movie rights. 585 00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:09,016 Can you help me, then, with Love? 586 00:20:09,058 --> 00:20:11,144 Of course I will. 587 00:20:12,853 --> 00:20:14,855 If you do something for me. 588 00:20:14,897 --> 00:20:16,399 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 589 00:20:16,441 --> 00:20:18,567 I would like to use your membership at the Balboa Club. 590 00:20:18,609 --> 00:20:20,320 The girl I've been telling you about-- 591 00:20:20,361 --> 00:20:22,738 she likes nice things, and if everything goes well tonight, 592 00:20:22,780 --> 00:20:24,657 I think I may want to take her out 593 00:20:24,698 --> 00:20:25,658 for a nice dinner. 594 00:20:25,699 --> 00:20:27,660 You really like this girl? 595 00:20:27,701 --> 00:20:29,829 - She's Tracey. - Oh. 596 00:20:29,870 --> 00:20:33,082 Fat Tracey or thin Tracey at the end? 597 00:20:33,124 --> 00:20:35,209 I think, just on this, you owe me the membership. 598 00:20:35,251 --> 00:20:36,669 You know, we're kind of maxed out 599 00:20:36,710 --> 00:20:38,838 at the club, but if you show them my card, 600 00:20:38,879 --> 00:20:43,550 I'm sure they won't turn you away at the door. 601 00:20:43,592 --> 00:20:45,636 You'd do this for me? 602 00:20:45,678 --> 00:20:47,138 I will if you... 603 00:20:47,180 --> 00:20:49,640 - Yeah, sure, fine. - Yeah? 604 00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:51,892 Yeah, I'll talk to him about the wall. 605 00:20:51,934 --> 00:20:53,978 - Good. -I mean, I want to change politics. 606 00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:56,314 - Great. - What's in it for me? 607 00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:58,107 So not completely change them? 608 00:20:58,149 --> 00:20:59,317 (chuckles) What do you want? 609 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:00,567 Well, actually 610 00:21:00,609 --> 00:21:02,028 I want you to talk to that warden guy 611 00:21:02,069 --> 00:21:03,904 about getting my boyfriend out 612 00:21:03,946 --> 00:21:06,366 'cause I really don't think Herbert's gonna help with that. 613 00:21:06,407 --> 00:21:08,326 Well, I have a script notes call with him on Tuesday. 614 00:21:09,952 --> 00:21:11,871 - Yeah, I'll talk to Warden Gentles. -Great, thank you. 615 00:21:11,912 --> 00:21:13,247 This is good. 616 00:21:13,289 --> 00:21:15,124 - Of course. - Glad we ran into each other. 617 00:21:15,166 --> 00:21:16,417 If you do something for me. 618 00:21:16,459 --> 00:21:18,794 I'm making this movie and I need everybody's rights. 619 00:21:18,836 --> 00:21:20,963 NARRATOR: And that's how Lindsay agreed 620 00:21:21,005 --> 00:21:23,549 - to give Michael her rights for his movie.-I'll do it. -Great. 621 00:21:23,590 --> 00:21:24,884 Thanks. 622 00:21:24,925 --> 00:21:26,469 That's it. 623 00:21:26,511 --> 00:21:28,429 NARRATOR: But it shouldn't have been 624 00:21:28,471 --> 00:21:30,681 because he should have asked for help getting into a club 625 00:21:30,723 --> 00:21:33,434 he was about to discover was members only. 626 00:21:33,476 --> 00:21:35,186 - This is a membership place, huh? -It is, 627 00:21:35,228 --> 00:21:36,812 - yes, members only. -Yeah, I'm meeting my son up there. 628 00:21:36,854 --> 00:21:39,148 Maybe he's already up there. Could you maybe page him 629 00:21:39,190 --> 00:21:41,401 - up there?-And when the page proved fruitless... 630 00:21:41,442 --> 00:21:43,444 If you'd like to have a seat and wait... 631 00:21:43,486 --> 00:21:46,197 You're gonna make me look like a big shot in front of my son. 632 00:21:46,239 --> 00:21:47,448 And when the page proved fruitless, 633 00:21:47,490 --> 00:21:50,034 Michael decided to head George Michael off 634 00:21:50,076 --> 00:21:53,287 before he could get to the club's lobby with a small lie. 635 00:21:53,329 --> 00:21:54,872 Hey, buddy, it's Dad. 636 00:21:54,914 --> 00:21:58,042 Um, I am having real trouble getting up there. 637 00:21:58,084 --> 00:22:00,545 Uh, this traffic is unbelievable. 638 00:22:00,586 --> 00:22:02,547 NARRATOR: Which led to a slightly bigger lie... 639 00:22:02,588 --> 00:22:05,966 We got a light aircraft right in the middle of the freeway. 640 00:22:06,008 --> 00:22:07,968 - You know?-... and then some effort to make it foolproof. 641 00:22:08,010 --> 00:22:10,555 Um, and, uh, the kicker is that there's no news crew. 642 00:22:10,596 --> 00:22:13,849 I mean, I guess they can't get in either 'cause of the traffic, 643 00:22:13,891 --> 00:22:15,726 so no one's going to be able to see this. 644 00:22:15,768 --> 00:22:16,810 NARRATOR: But perhaps, 645 00:22:16,852 --> 00:22:18,645 had Michael not have lied, 646 00:22:18,687 --> 00:22:21,441 he wouldn't have felt suspicious when, moments later, 647 00:22:21,482 --> 00:22:23,192 - he received a return call from his son...-You know what? 648 00:22:23,234 --> 00:22:25,152 I bet we're sitting in the exact same traffic. 649 00:22:25,194 --> 00:22:28,114 - This is a mess.-... canceling the get-together entirely. 650 00:22:28,155 --> 00:22:30,908 Oh, God, they're forcing us off. Oh, they're closing the lanes. 651 00:22:30,950 --> 00:22:33,035 NARRATOR: Meanwhile, in Herbert's hotel room, 652 00:22:33,077 --> 00:22:34,619 Lindsay was worried she was 653 00:22:34,661 --> 00:22:36,956 too quickly abandoning her principles. 654 00:22:36,997 --> 00:22:39,083 Wait... I can't do this 655 00:22:39,125 --> 00:22:42,420 unless you promise to be against the wall. 656 00:22:42,462 --> 00:22:44,338 What the hell? 657 00:22:44,380 --> 00:22:45,590 It's better for my back anyway. 658 00:22:45,630 --> 00:22:46,799 Thank you. 659 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:48,384 NARRATOR: Although technically 660 00:22:48,426 --> 00:22:50,428 that was one of Michael's principles. 661 00:22:50,470 --> 00:22:51,471 LINDSAY: Well... 662 00:22:51,512 --> 00:22:53,306 That was so not quick. 663 00:22:53,347 --> 00:22:54,265 (chuckles) 664 00:22:54,307 --> 00:22:55,349 Well, I paid for six hours. 665 00:22:55,391 --> 00:22:57,059 I want to get my money's worth. 666 00:22:57,101 --> 00:22:58,643 Imagine what would have happened if you had the room 667 00:22:58,685 --> 00:22:59,979 for the whole night. 668 00:23:00,020 --> 00:23:01,564 Oh, I got it for the whole month. 669 00:23:01,606 --> 00:23:03,608 You crack me up. 670 00:23:03,648 --> 00:23:05,485 God, can you believe this is happening? 671 00:23:05,526 --> 00:23:07,820 I mean, we're such opposites and yet we're so in synch. 672 00:23:07,861 --> 00:23:10,864 - It's like we finish each other's... -Sandwiches? 673 00:23:10,906 --> 00:23:13,367 What's the point of raising funds if I'm eating sandwiches? 674 00:23:13,409 --> 00:23:15,786 - (murmurs) - I got something for you. 675 00:23:15,828 --> 00:23:17,871 (chuckling): Oh, really? 676 00:23:17,913 --> 00:23:20,374 (gasping) 677 00:23:20,416 --> 00:23:22,960 NARRATOR: And perhaps it was the heart that made her wonder 678 00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:26,964 if Herbert was the Love the Four Seasons shaman spoke of. 679 00:23:27,006 --> 00:23:30,343 When love is near, your heart will be happy. 680 00:23:30,384 --> 00:23:31,552 HERBERT: This way 681 00:23:31,594 --> 00:23:34,805 you'll always have a little Love near your heart. 682 00:23:34,847 --> 00:23:36,849 (mystical chanting) 683 00:23:36,890 --> 00:23:39,018 - Aah, Jesus Christ! - Oh! 684 00:23:39,059 --> 00:23:40,311 - I'm sorry. - Why would you do that? 685 00:23:40,353 --> 00:23:42,021 No, I thought it was cute, I saw it in a movie. 686 00:23:42,062 --> 00:23:43,189 - Okay? - Okay, okay, great, thank you. 687 00:23:43,230 --> 00:23:44,773 Oh, I feel so special. 688 00:23:44,815 --> 00:23:46,025 You are special. 689 00:23:46,066 --> 00:23:47,818 NARRATOR: Lindsay wasn't special, 690 00:23:47,860 --> 00:23:50,655 but he'd gotten the necklaces on special. 691 00:23:50,695 --> 00:23:52,072 LINDSAY: So, when can I see you 692 00:23:52,114 --> 00:23:53,782 - again? - The only way 693 00:23:53,824 --> 00:23:56,869 we can see each other is if you work for my campaign. 694 00:23:56,910 --> 00:24:00,498 You are going to be my key advisor. 695 00:24:00,540 --> 00:24:03,042 NARRATOR: She would be enacting social change after all. 696 00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:04,627 I would like that very much. 697 00:24:04,669 --> 00:24:05,794 (Herbert chuckles) 698 00:24:05,836 --> 00:24:06,920 She's going to need a key to my room, 699 00:24:06,962 --> 00:24:10,007 and I'd advise you to use it when I call you. 700 00:24:13,093 --> 00:24:15,179 NARRATOR: Since Herbert couldn't officially spend money 701 00:24:15,221 --> 00:24:16,847 on Lindsay, and Lindsay hadn't told Herbert 702 00:24:16,889 --> 00:24:18,765 - who she really was... - Uh, why don't you go 703 00:24:18,807 --> 00:24:20,434 - make the rounds, and, uh, I'll get us checked in. -Okay. 704 00:24:20,476 --> 00:24:21,977 ...Lindsay had to pay for dinner 705 00:24:22,019 --> 00:24:23,646 - the way she always had... - Uh, Bluth. 706 00:24:23,688 --> 00:24:25,981 - I made a reservation. - ...by secretly putting it 707 00:24:26,023 --> 00:24:27,525 - on her family tab. - Hi-lo. Nice to meet you. 708 00:24:27,567 --> 00:24:29,109 Oh, I'm sorry, the Bluths have been seated. 709 00:24:29,151 --> 00:24:30,944 But she wasn't the only Bluth 710 00:24:30,986 --> 00:24:32,613 pretending to be something they weren't that night. 711 00:24:32,655 --> 00:24:35,658 Who's the cheap redhead? 712 00:24:35,700 --> 00:24:38,244 Well, hello. 713 00:24:38,285 --> 00:24:39,620 Hello. 714 00:24:39,662 --> 00:24:40,829 Indeed. 715 00:24:40,871 --> 00:24:43,165 Look at you. What are you doing here? 716 00:24:43,207 --> 00:24:45,834 I need the membership. I'm taking my boss out to dinner. 717 00:24:45,876 --> 00:24:47,752 It's too late. I already made a deal with Dad for it. 718 00:24:47,794 --> 00:24:50,047 This is why I had to ask you for the in with Herbert Love. 719 00:24:50,089 --> 00:24:52,007 Exactly, and that's why you are leaving, 720 00:24:52,049 --> 00:24:53,967 and I'm going to stay because I'm the one who did the favor. 721 00:24:54,009 --> 00:24:55,886 I got Love against the wall. Plus I've got to impress him. 722 00:24:55,928 --> 00:24:58,013 He's making me part of his campaign. 723 00:24:58,055 --> 00:24:59,764 I'm sorry, there seems to have been a mix-up. 724 00:24:59,806 --> 00:25:01,475 - A merry one. - Oh. 725 00:25:01,517 --> 00:25:04,103 A merry one. I already paid you back for the favor when 726 00:25:04,144 --> 00:25:06,188 I talked to the warden about getting Marky out of prison. 727 00:25:06,230 --> 00:25:07,607 LINDSAY: Oh, God, not now. 728 00:25:07,648 --> 00:25:09,316 - When? - I don't know, but listen. 729 00:25:09,358 --> 00:25:10,901 I haven't been on a date in a very, very long time, 730 00:25:10,943 --> 00:25:12,403 and she's already going out with Ron Howard 731 00:25:12,445 --> 00:25:13,778 so I need to impress her. 732 00:25:13,820 --> 00:25:15,489 Actually, it was Ron's daughter, 733 00:25:15,531 --> 00:25:17,074 but Michael still didn't know that. 734 00:25:17,116 --> 00:25:19,452 Great to see you. And you look so good. 735 00:25:19,493 --> 00:25:20,703 So do you. I do hate the campaign, 736 00:25:20,745 --> 00:25:22,955 okay, but I'm changing him. 737 00:25:22,996 --> 00:25:24,290 I'm his key advisor. 738 00:25:24,331 --> 00:25:25,999 Although without an office, 739 00:25:26,041 --> 00:25:28,461 she was forced to advise him in the back of his limo. 740 00:25:28,502 --> 00:25:30,921 And soon she was advising him all over town. 741 00:25:30,963 --> 00:25:32,673 LINDSAY: And he respect me for it. 742 00:25:32,715 --> 00:25:34,258 He respects me for who I am. 743 00:25:34,300 --> 00:25:36,009 So does mine. Listen, we'll share it, okay? 744 00:25:36,051 --> 00:25:37,720 - Okay. - Got it? Great. 745 00:25:37,762 --> 00:25:39,639 Oh! My name is Cindy Featherbottom. 746 00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:41,974 Right. Oh, and I-I used to be a real estate tycoon, 747 00:25:42,015 --> 00:25:43,808 now I'm an impressive producer. Got it? 748 00:25:43,850 --> 00:25:45,102 - Got it. - Eat light. 749 00:25:45,144 --> 00:25:48,105 This is my date. This is Rebel Alley. 750 00:25:48,147 --> 00:25:49,856 Oh, and my boss, Herbert Love. 751 00:25:49,898 --> 00:25:52,067 - Hi-lo. - Hi-lo? 752 00:25:52,109 --> 00:25:53,986 Just like your plan to hurt the poor. 753 00:25:54,027 --> 00:25:56,739 I thought that was about neglecting the poor. 754 00:25:56,781 --> 00:25:58,907 I guess the special tonight is red snapper. 755 00:25:58,949 --> 00:26:00,951 How do you know this woman? 756 00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:06,499 Uh, she is... um... 757 00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:10,210 - I just, I mean... - (Lindsay laughs) 758 00:26:10,252 --> 00:26:12,045 - High school. - Brother and sister. 759 00:26:12,087 --> 00:26:13,673 We can't be brother-sister-- she knows about the family. 760 00:26:13,714 --> 00:26:15,716 - We don't. - Just met. 761 00:26:15,758 --> 00:26:17,510 Yeah, so, but let's eat. 762 00:26:17,551 --> 00:26:19,219 NARRATOR: And that's how Lindsay found herself 763 00:26:19,261 --> 00:26:22,640 on a very awkward double date with her brother. 764 00:26:22,682 --> 00:26:25,643 Is everybody's food as delicious as my side salad? 765 00:26:25,685 --> 00:26:27,812 And a couple of glasses of white wine in, 766 00:26:27,852 --> 00:26:30,564 Rebel started to espouse her liberal agenda. 767 00:26:30,606 --> 00:26:32,566 It's just a little hard to sit two feet away from someone 768 00:26:32,608 --> 00:26:35,194 who doesn't believe in paying for a woman's contraception. 769 00:26:35,235 --> 00:26:38,280 Well, to be fair, no, he does pay for the room. 770 00:26:38,322 --> 00:26:41,116 Is there anything better than the great American scallop? 771 00:26:41,158 --> 00:26:43,369 Look how he changes the subject. 772 00:26:43,410 --> 00:26:45,705 Aren't you glad your teenager's not here to see this? 773 00:26:45,746 --> 00:26:47,122 You have a teenager? 774 00:26:47,164 --> 00:26:49,291 I'm a movie prod... 775 00:26:49,333 --> 00:26:51,210 Movie producer. 776 00:26:51,251 --> 00:26:53,629 Producing a movie right now-- Rebel's in it 777 00:26:53,671 --> 00:26:55,964 - for Imagine Entertainment. - Oh! 778 00:26:56,006 --> 00:26:57,882 Is that Ron Howard's company? 779 00:26:57,924 --> 00:26:59,677 - Uh, yeah. - Yes. 780 00:26:59,719 --> 00:27:02,012 I don't want to be the one to say it, but I hate that guy. 781 00:27:02,054 --> 00:27:04,889 He's just another Hollywood liberal big shot. 782 00:27:04,931 --> 00:27:07,267 Oh. There are a lot of those Ron Howards out there 783 00:27:07,309 --> 00:27:08,853 that do abuse their power, 784 00:27:08,893 --> 00:27:11,480 but I will tell you, sir, that I do not do that. 785 00:27:11,522 --> 00:27:15,359 Well, don't you have to have power to abuse the power? 786 00:27:15,401 --> 00:27:18,070 Um, I am not going to sit here and defend Ron Howard 787 00:27:18,111 --> 00:27:21,866 to someone who's never achieved half of what he's achieved. 788 00:27:21,906 --> 00:27:23,283 Are you saying that to him or to me? 789 00:27:23,325 --> 00:27:24,535 I forgot how touchy 790 00:27:24,577 --> 00:27:26,119 these Hollywood people can be. 791 00:27:26,161 --> 00:27:29,206 Oh, I'm not. I'm not. Are you saying that I am? 792 00:27:29,248 --> 00:27:30,708 Maybe Ron Howard is, but I-I mean, I don't know. 793 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:32,917 But I'm not. And I am also not 794 00:27:32,959 --> 00:27:34,754 one of those Beverly Hills billionaires 795 00:27:34,795 --> 00:27:36,296 who can't go two minutes without putting his phone to his... 796 00:27:36,338 --> 00:27:39,924 I got to take this. Hold on one second. Hello? 797 00:27:39,966 --> 00:27:42,511 Hey, George Michael. You stuck in traffic, pal? 798 00:27:42,553 --> 00:27:44,764 No, I just feel terrible that we couldn't get together 799 00:27:44,805 --> 00:27:46,682 the other night and, uh, I miss you, you know. 800 00:27:46,724 --> 00:27:48,726 But I'm free all night if you wanted... 801 00:27:48,768 --> 00:27:50,436 - Well... listen, I-I...-But Michael was still stinging... 802 00:27:50,477 --> 00:27:52,312 I'm in the middle of a film meeting... 803 00:27:52,354 --> 00:27:54,022 ...over his son not making it to the Ealing Club... 804 00:27:54,064 --> 00:27:57,025 I've got these people in politics involved and I just... 805 00:27:57,067 --> 00:28:00,320 You know, I can't get away this time, you know. Maybe... 806 00:28:00,362 --> 00:28:03,532 ...even though Michael had lied to him about it first. 807 00:28:03,574 --> 00:28:04,949 You know, just, I'm a super busy guy. 808 00:28:04,991 --> 00:28:06,619 - And back at the table... - So... 809 00:28:06,660 --> 00:28:08,621 I can't believe that a woman would support this guy. 810 00:28:08,662 --> 00:28:10,456 ...Lindsay found herself torn... 811 00:28:10,497 --> 00:28:13,793 And I assume by being with him, you just parrot his values. 812 00:28:13,834 --> 00:28:16,128 - ...between who she was with...-I don't appreciate you 813 00:28:16,169 --> 00:28:17,421 saying that, okay? 814 00:28:17,463 --> 00:28:19,256 I have my own values, Rebel, 815 00:28:19,298 --> 00:28:21,592 and believe it or not, they're closer to yours than you think. 816 00:28:21,634 --> 00:28:23,260 ...and who she wanted to be. 817 00:28:23,302 --> 00:28:25,638 'Cause I do appreciate you saying that. 818 00:28:25,679 --> 00:28:28,390 But what do I know? I'm just some shallow Hollywood... 819 00:28:28,432 --> 00:28:30,726 Oh, God, I've got to get this. 820 00:28:30,768 --> 00:28:32,977 It could be my agent. Hello? 821 00:28:33,019 --> 00:28:35,355 HERBERT: Now that is one redhead 822 00:28:35,397 --> 00:28:37,566 I do not want to have sexual relations with. 823 00:28:37,608 --> 00:28:38,943 (laughing) 824 00:28:38,984 --> 00:28:41,779 - Well... - So... are we having dessert? 825 00:28:41,821 --> 00:28:43,572 - No. - No. Uh-uh. 826 00:28:43,614 --> 00:28:45,157 Well, I don't want to be the one to say it, 827 00:28:45,198 --> 00:28:47,033 but if we are not going to have dessert, 828 00:28:47,075 --> 00:28:50,036 - then I think I am going to leave. -Oh, no. 829 00:28:50,078 --> 00:28:52,665 But-but we're going to discuss those new positions tonight. 830 00:28:52,706 --> 00:28:54,750 Wasn't that the plan? 831 00:28:54,792 --> 00:28:56,919 I think the best position for me to be in tonight 832 00:28:56,961 --> 00:28:58,671 is with my wife, 833 00:28:58,712 --> 00:29:01,089 and tomorrow I'm taking my wife and children 834 00:29:01,131 --> 00:29:04,176 to see the beautiful American ocean. 835 00:29:04,217 --> 00:29:07,429 (diners applauding) 836 00:29:10,390 --> 00:29:12,643 Lindsay started rethinking her new life and that's when 837 00:29:12,685 --> 00:29:14,770 she ran into the man from her old one. 838 00:29:14,812 --> 00:29:17,356 - Marky? - Lindsay? 839 00:29:17,397 --> 00:29:18,941 - Oh, Lindsay. - Marky. 840 00:29:18,983 --> 00:29:21,902 I did it. I beat the system. 841 00:29:21,944 --> 00:29:23,278 I got out my way. 842 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:25,405 I thought my brother asked Warden Gentles 843 00:29:25,447 --> 00:29:27,658 - to get you out. - No, I mean from the Dumpster. 844 00:29:27,700 --> 00:29:29,368 You wouldn't believe the scallops they're throwing 845 00:29:29,409 --> 00:29:31,829 away here, but I got out of that Dumpster my way. 846 00:29:31,871 --> 00:29:33,747 I've really missed you. 847 00:29:33,789 --> 00:29:36,458 Yeah, I missed you, too. 848 00:29:36,500 --> 00:29:38,961 I feel like I really lost my way for a while. 849 00:29:39,003 --> 00:29:40,629 Me, too. It's almost like 850 00:29:40,671 --> 00:29:43,883 maybe we shouldn't skip town after this next one. 851 00:29:43,924 --> 00:29:46,301 Next one? Another paint bomb? 852 00:29:46,343 --> 00:29:48,012 No, a real one. 853 00:29:48,053 --> 00:29:50,973 On the Cinco de Cuatro, Love's boat is going to... 854 00:29:51,015 --> 00:29:53,684 - Sink-o. - ...go into the... Yes, sink-o. 855 00:29:53,726 --> 00:29:55,101 See, the coast guard is going to be busy that night, 856 00:29:55,143 --> 00:29:56,770 so after it's done, we slip away 857 00:29:56,812 --> 00:29:59,940 and make our way down to Mexico and reunite with Mom. 858 00:29:59,982 --> 00:30:01,567 I just have to find a boat that won't get chorizo 859 00:30:01,608 --> 00:30:04,028 - caught in the propeller. - Lindsay was torn. 860 00:30:04,069 --> 00:30:06,071 Her head was with Marky... 861 00:30:06,112 --> 00:30:08,824 but it was Love who was close to her heart. 862 00:30:08,866 --> 00:30:12,828 So the next night at Cinco, she felt she had no choice 863 00:30:12,870 --> 00:30:14,997 - but to betray one - Herbert. 864 00:30:15,039 --> 00:30:16,874 - to protect the other. - Hi. Um, listen. 865 00:30:16,916 --> 00:30:20,210 I'm here undercover because I have some inside information 866 00:30:20,252 --> 00:30:22,462 that you really need to know about. 867 00:30:22,504 --> 00:30:24,006 But as it turned out, Herbert had 868 00:30:24,048 --> 00:30:26,633 some undercover information for her, too. 869 00:30:26,675 --> 00:30:29,177 I cannot be under the covers with you anymore. 870 00:30:29,219 --> 00:30:30,930 It's over between us. 871 00:30:30,971 --> 00:30:34,140 My wife found out and I told her there was nothing emotional, 872 00:30:34,182 --> 00:30:35,392 that you were just a prostitute. 873 00:30:35,434 --> 00:30:38,186 - I'm not a prostitute. - Oh, I know, I know. 874 00:30:38,228 --> 00:30:39,772 The point is, we are through. 875 00:30:39,813 --> 00:30:41,023 Here's a little severance package 876 00:30:41,065 --> 00:30:42,733 for servicing my package. 877 00:30:42,775 --> 00:30:45,569 Lindsay tried to throw the money in his face, 878 00:30:45,611 --> 00:30:48,488 but she didn't have the muscle memory for it. 879 00:30:49,573 --> 00:30:51,241 - She's keeping it. - Oh, good. 880 00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:52,910 And don't forget to vote. 881 00:30:52,952 --> 00:30:54,411 This isn't over. 882 00:30:54,453 --> 00:30:56,747 I'm not some taco you can throw into the bay. 883 00:30:56,789 --> 00:30:58,707 (grunts) 884 00:30:58,749 --> 00:31:01,585 - Lindsay wanted to get back - I can't do this. 885 00:31:01,627 --> 00:31:03,087 at Love... 886 00:31:03,128 --> 00:31:05,881 but not by blowing him up 887 00:31:05,923 --> 00:31:09,426 and heading to Mexico to be with Marky's awful mother. 888 00:31:09,468 --> 00:31:14,014 And that's when she ran into her own awful mother. 889 00:31:14,056 --> 00:31:16,349 Mom. What are you doing here? 890 00:31:16,391 --> 00:31:18,393 Lindsay. I thought you were a hooker. 891 00:31:18,435 --> 00:31:20,479 - Again. - It's a wig. 892 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:22,022 No one recognizes me in it. 893 00:31:22,064 --> 00:31:23,607 Oh, I recognized you. 894 00:31:23,649 --> 00:31:25,317 Let me rephrase that more kindly. 895 00:31:25,358 --> 00:31:29,154 I hear you're hooking now with Herbert Love. 896 00:31:29,195 --> 00:31:30,823 - It's called hooking up. - Oh. 897 00:31:30,864 --> 00:31:32,950 And, yeah, I got a little sidetracked, 898 00:31:32,992 --> 00:31:35,494 but I know who I am now. 899 00:31:35,535 --> 00:31:37,329 I'm back to being severely liberal. 900 00:31:37,370 --> 00:31:38,872 Well, like I said, 901 00:31:38,914 --> 00:31:40,624 the one time you were nice enough to visit me, 902 00:31:40,666 --> 00:31:42,459 you are who you are-- 903 00:31:42,501 --> 00:31:44,628 a blonde, waspy Orange County princess 904 00:31:44,670 --> 00:31:46,755 who doesn't care about anything but herself 905 00:31:46,797 --> 00:31:48,674 and that's okay. 906 00:31:48,715 --> 00:31:50,759 Ah, sarcasm. 907 00:31:50,801 --> 00:31:55,180 No, I'm a Bluth and so are you. 908 00:31:55,221 --> 00:31:57,933 You really know how to twist the knife. 909 00:31:57,975 --> 00:32:00,226 But you are right about one thing. 910 00:32:00,268 --> 00:32:01,854 Lindsay was done pretending to be red. 911 00:32:01,895 --> 00:32:04,523 I don't need this anymore. 912 00:32:04,564 --> 00:32:05,983 And she decided the best way to get back 913 00:32:06,025 --> 00:32:08,443 at her mother and Herbert Love 914 00:32:08,485 --> 00:32:11,237 was by working for their mutual rival. 915 00:32:11,279 --> 00:32:14,074 Lucille 2. I've got great news. 916 00:32:14,116 --> 00:32:17,369 I'm finally available to become your campaign manager. 917 00:32:17,410 --> 00:32:19,038 Oh, that's lovely, dear. 918 00:32:19,079 --> 00:32:22,415 But I found someone more qualified than you. 919 00:32:22,457 --> 00:32:23,917 Hello, Lindsay. 920 00:32:23,959 --> 00:32:26,294 Sally. 921 00:32:26,336 --> 00:32:27,713 It was Sally Sitwell, a woman 922 00:32:27,754 --> 00:32:28,964 who'd long been Lindsay's rival. 923 00:32:29,006 --> 00:32:31,299 - It's been a while. - Mm. 924 00:32:31,341 --> 00:32:33,593 How is she more qualified than me? 925 00:32:33,635 --> 00:32:35,137 She has integrity. 926 00:32:35,179 --> 00:32:36,346 And look at this hair. 927 00:32:36,388 --> 00:32:38,140 Look at this beautiful, long hair. 928 00:32:39,432 --> 00:32:41,560 I made you a banner. 929 00:32:41,601 --> 00:32:43,353 Look, I can really help this campaign. 930 00:32:43,395 --> 00:32:45,731 You already have, more than you know. 931 00:32:45,772 --> 00:32:49,401 - Now, give her a little show-and-tell. -Mm. 932 00:32:49,442 --> 00:32:50,652 Show-and-tell? 933 00:32:50,694 --> 00:32:52,779 Oh, she just means these photos 934 00:32:52,821 --> 00:32:55,824 of Herbert Love with a mystery redhead 935 00:32:55,866 --> 00:32:57,492 he's cheating on his wife with. 936 00:32:57,534 --> 00:32:59,078 Who took these? 937 00:32:59,119 --> 00:33:00,829 The first two were taken by the security camera 938 00:33:00,871 --> 00:33:02,998 in the Albertsons parking lot. 939 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:06,085 And the third was left in the photo booth at the Ealing Club. 940 00:33:06,126 --> 00:33:08,962 - God, that was a photo booth? - Mm-hmm. 941 00:33:09,004 --> 00:33:11,339 No one can know about this. 942 00:33:11,381 --> 00:33:13,299 Oh, I'm afraid they're going to. 943 00:33:13,341 --> 00:33:16,678 Lucille has copies-- she wants to go viral with this. 944 00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:18,097 Herbert Love with his hooker? 945 00:33:18,138 --> 00:33:20,099 She'll win for sure. 946 00:33:20,140 --> 00:33:21,600 I can't let her do that. 947 00:33:21,641 --> 00:33:24,770 I don't think you can stop her. 948 00:33:24,811 --> 00:33:26,855 Anyway, it was so great running into you again. 949 00:33:26,897 --> 00:33:28,690 - Mwah! - Lindsay was horrified 950 00:33:28,732 --> 00:33:30,817 that the world would view her 951 00:33:30,859 --> 00:33:32,485 - as Love's prostitute. - Vote for Love. Vote for Love. 952 00:33:32,527 --> 00:33:34,320 And then Lindsay ran into someone else 953 00:33:34,362 --> 00:33:35,989 - who was looking for Love. - David. -Who are you? 954 00:33:36,031 --> 00:33:37,199 I'm Cindy Featherbottom. 955 00:33:37,241 --> 00:33:38,825 I've been looking for you. 956 00:33:38,867 --> 00:33:40,827 Love's gone missing and I've got to find someone 957 00:33:40,869 --> 00:33:43,496 to jump onto that stage and to show everyone here 958 00:33:43,538 --> 00:33:46,917 that we are the party that has complete con-con... 959 00:33:46,959 --> 00:33:48,752 Complete con-con-con... 960 00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:50,295 - con-con... Complete... - ...trol? 961 00:33:50,336 --> 00:33:51,880 Giant. ...trol. 962 00:33:51,922 --> 00:33:54,049 And that's when Lindsay found an opportunity... 963 00:33:54,091 --> 00:33:56,468 - I'll do it. - to put a spin on the looming 964 00:33:56,509 --> 00:33:58,137 - photos scandal.-Oh, my God, thank you, thank you. 965 00:33:58,178 --> 00:34:00,264 And I'm so sorry about that giant crack earlier. 966 00:34:00,305 --> 00:34:04,601 Okay, raise the mics, everybody! New speaker! 967 00:34:04,643 --> 00:34:06,103 So, like many before her, 968 00:34:06,145 --> 00:34:09,022 Lindsay would accuse Herbert Love... 969 00:34:09,064 --> 00:34:10,690 Can I have everyone's attention? 970 00:34:10,732 --> 00:34:13,318 ...of sexual harassment. 971 00:34:13,359 --> 00:34:16,113 I am Herbert Love's "key advisor." 972 00:34:16,155 --> 00:34:18,198 (crowd cheering) 973 00:34:18,240 --> 00:34:19,866 Uh, thank you, but... 974 00:34:19,908 --> 00:34:21,493 But first she had to turn his supporters against him. 975 00:34:21,534 --> 00:34:23,578 Listen, I have a few things I'd like to tell you 976 00:34:23,620 --> 00:34:25,289 about Herbert Love. 977 00:34:25,330 --> 00:34:28,083 Love wants to put up a wall. 978 00:34:28,125 --> 00:34:29,751 - (cheering) - No, no. 979 00:34:29,793 --> 00:34:32,254 I mean, not just any wall. 980 00:34:32,296 --> 00:34:35,799 A wall to keep out the Mexicans. 981 00:34:35,841 --> 00:34:37,176 (cheering) 982 00:34:37,217 --> 00:34:40,179 Oh, wow, what a great crowd, uh... 983 00:34:40,220 --> 00:34:41,429 And that's when the blowback began. 984 00:34:41,471 --> 00:34:44,016 - Checkmate! - (angry shouting) 985 00:34:44,057 --> 00:34:46,268 - (crowd cheering) - But no, you don't understand. 986 00:34:46,310 --> 00:34:48,312 He wants to separate... 987 00:34:48,353 --> 00:34:50,063 Oh! (screams) 988 00:34:50,105 --> 00:34:52,649 - Viva Méjico. - That's my necklace. 989 00:34:52,691 --> 00:34:56,903 (angry shouting, clattering) 990 00:34:56,945 --> 00:34:58,697 What-what's going on? 991 00:34:58,738 --> 00:35:01,033 The marauders, lady, a bunch of young Mexicans-- 992 00:35:01,074 --> 00:35:02,242 they're taking over Cinco de Cuatro. 993 00:35:02,284 --> 00:35:04,036 They don't find it funny anymore. 994 00:35:04,077 --> 00:35:07,372 But that was my necklace. I mean... God. 995 00:35:07,413 --> 00:35:10,416 They don't belong here, we belong here. 996 00:35:10,458 --> 00:35:13,670 (cheering) 997 00:35:13,712 --> 00:35:17,382 I mean, someone should put up a wall. 998 00:35:17,423 --> 00:35:19,009 But that's when Lindsay found herself 999 00:35:19,051 --> 00:35:20,552 - saying this... - Yeah. 1000 00:35:20,593 --> 00:35:22,679 We should put up a wall. 1001 00:35:22,721 --> 00:35:26,308 - Put up this wall. - (cheering) 1002 00:35:26,350 --> 00:35:29,602 Put... up... this wall. 1003 00:35:29,644 --> 00:35:33,398 ALL (chanting): Put up this wall! 1004 00:35:33,439 --> 00:35:35,608 ...which was originally her mother's idea. 1005 00:35:35,650 --> 00:35:38,904 Although it was horrible news for her father. 1006 00:35:38,945 --> 00:35:41,073 - Put up this wall! - And that's when Lindsay 1007 00:35:41,114 --> 00:35:43,116 found out who she really was. 1008 00:35:43,158 --> 00:35:48,247 My name is Lindsay Bluth, and this is who I am. 1009 00:35:48,288 --> 00:35:50,665 A Bluth, just like her mother. 1010 00:35:50,707 --> 00:35:53,418 She's a game changer. 1011 00:35:53,459 --> 00:35:55,628 (crowd cheering) 1012 00:35:58,423 --> 00:36:01,051 Herbert Love is discovered in a coma. 1013 00:36:01,093 --> 00:36:03,011 They think it happened during the blowback. 1014 00:36:03,053 --> 00:36:04,930 They found him behind the Kick a Goat. 1015 00:36:04,971 --> 00:36:08,100 The doctors say he may come out of it in a week to ten years. 1016 00:36:08,141 --> 00:36:09,684 So I have one question for you. 1017 00:36:09,726 --> 00:36:11,477 - Would you consider... - Yes. 1018 00:36:11,519 --> 00:36:13,521 - Would you consider... -Yes. 1019 00:36:13,563 --> 00:36:15,315 - Would you consider... - Yes. 1020 00:36:15,357 --> 00:36:17,442 Would you consider running in his place? 1021 00:36:18,526 --> 00:36:20,320 - Yes. - Fantastic. 1022 00:36:20,362 --> 00:36:22,114 Sweetheart, could you work his thumb? 1023 00:36:22,155 --> 00:36:24,574 And she even gets Herbert's endorsement. 1024 00:36:24,616 --> 00:36:26,243 And Annyong tries to stick 1025 00:36:26,285 --> 00:36:28,494 the Bluth family for a tomato juice 1026 00:36:28,536 --> 00:36:30,663 that costs him $700 1027 00:36:30,705 --> 00:36:33,250 and ultimately his freedom. 1028 00:36:33,292 --> 00:36:35,085 Good-bye, Annyong. 1029 00:36:38,375 --> 00:36:41,948