1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:01,257 Previously on 'Boston Legal' 2 00:00:01,257 --> 00:00:02,639 Melvin Palmer, how are you? 3 00:00:02,639 --> 00:00:03,774 I'm grand, actually 4 00:00:03,774 --> 00:00:05,281 but I go by Alan Shore. 5 00:00:05,281 --> 00:00:06,337 You're a hoot, that's what. 6 00:00:06,337 --> 00:00:09,782 We have an expression in Texas. You're all hat, 7 00:00:09,782 --> 00:00:10,799 and no cattle. 8 00:00:10,799 --> 00:00:12,973 I know I've seen your face. I don't know your real identity, 9 00:00:12,973 --> 00:00:15,428 but I know you've only been Lorraine Weller since 1997. 10 00:00:15,428 --> 00:00:16,938 I owned and operated a brothel. 11 00:00:16,938 --> 00:00:19,091 After being arrested, I reached a deal with the authorities 12 00:00:19,091 --> 00:00:21,916 whereby I would not be prosecuted if I agreed to disappear. 13 00:00:21,916 --> 00:00:24,149 Jerry, would you like to get a drink with me? 14 00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:25,646 And we all know what's supposed to happen on the third date 15 00:00:25,646 --> 00:00:26,750 after two wonderful dates? 16 00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:29,349 - You've really never kissed a woman? - Not a real one. 17 00:00:29,349 --> 00:00:30,760 Oh, thank you, god. 18 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:32,286 I don't want to be let out. Just let her in. 19 00:00:32,286 --> 00:00:34,653 Would you be riding on the elevator with us? 20 00:00:34,653 --> 00:00:36,252 Think you can handle it, Denny? 21 00:00:36,937 --> 00:00:41,095 자막제작 - NSC 자막팀 (http://club.nate.com/tsm) 22 00:00:59,742 --> 00:01:01,654 Scotch and eggnog? 23 00:01:01,654 --> 00:01:03,188 No thank you. 24 00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:07,167 What's with all the guns here Denny, if you don't mind my asking? 25 00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:08,457 Coast Guard Auxiliary. 26 00:01:08,457 --> 00:01:10,630 I'm serving my country. It's fantastic. 27 00:01:10,630 --> 00:01:12,716 Getting reacquainted with weaponry 28 00:01:12,716 --> 00:01:14,113 Wanna join? 29 00:01:14,113 --> 00:01:17,448 Actually Denny, I do serve my country. 30 00:01:17,448 --> 00:01:19,585 Which is one of the reasons I'm here. 31 00:01:19,585 --> 00:01:25,353 In fact I joined the board of Green People to save this country as well as the planet. 32 00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:29,629 Denny, this is a little awkward. 33 00:01:29,852 --> 00:01:33,896 Green People hired Crane, Poole and Schmidt on my recommendation, 34 00:01:33,896 --> 00:01:36,254 and the only reason I made that recommendation was 35 00:01:36,254 --> 00:01:38,908 because you told me your firm was extremely green. 36 00:01:38,908 --> 00:01:39,897 Yeah. So? 37 00:01:39,897 --> 00:01:41,352 Well, it's not. Not really. 38 00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,210 What are you talking about? We have all this, 39 00:01:44,210 --> 00:01:45,899 uh, curly-cue light bulbs. 40 00:01:45,899 --> 00:01:49,690 Yeah. Well, there are major areas where this firm is not green. 41 00:01:49,690 --> 00:01:52,985 You have no solar panels, no carpool policies. 42 00:01:52,985 --> 00:01:56,594 I discovered you recently threw away your old computers 43 00:01:56,594 --> 00:01:58,796 - which contain hazardous waste. - Oh, Walt. 44 00:01:58,796 --> 00:02:00,694 And which will probably wind up in a landfill. 45 00:02:00,694 --> 00:02:05,962 Meanwhile Green People is paying your firm legal fees in the six figures every year. 46 00:02:05,962 --> 00:02:07,082 Bottom line, Denny. 47 00:02:07,082 --> 00:02:09,434 Get green or I'll recommend we hire another law firm. 48 00:02:09,434 --> 00:02:11,134 Walt. 49 00:02:11,134 --> 00:02:12,888 May I say something? 50 00:02:12,888 --> 00:02:14,462 Okay. 51 00:02:14,462 --> 00:02:16,525 I love the environment. I really do. 52 00:02:16,525 --> 00:02:19,717 And every day I kiss the ground I walk on. 53 00:02:19,717 --> 00:02:22,551 As do many others because I am after all... Denny Crane. 54 00:02:22,551 --> 00:02:25,854 - Oh, God. - What's this? You got a tick? 55 00:02:25,854 --> 00:02:29,988 Denny. I take this cause seriously. 56 00:02:29,988 --> 00:02:31,896 I'm committing the rest of my life to it. 57 00:02:31,896 --> 00:02:36,015 I told you it was important for our law firm to be environmentally conscience. 58 00:02:36,015 --> 00:02:38,527 You're wearing blinking antlers for God's sakes! 59 00:02:38,527 --> 00:02:40,102 Walt, it's Christmas! 60 00:02:40,102 --> 00:02:43,850 It's the time of year to embrace giving and getting and waste and gluttony 61 00:02:43,850 --> 00:02:46,389 and all the things that make God and this country great! 62 00:02:46,389 --> 00:02:48,832 - Don't be such a girl. - Now I'm getting angry. 63 00:02:48,832 --> 00:02:49,888 So am I! 64 00:02:49,888 --> 00:02:52,347 Frankly, I hope this planet survives. I really do. 65 00:02:52,347 --> 00:02:56,762 But I am getting sick of you smug, hybrid driving socialists 66 00:02:56,762 --> 00:02:59,735 telling the rest of us how to live our lives! I'm rich, okay? 67 00:02:59,735 --> 00:03:01,824 Like to guzzle a little gas now and then. 68 00:03:01,824 --> 00:03:04,975 I keep my thermostat at 72 during the winter. 69 00:03:04,975 --> 00:03:08,272 I prefer night games in football. 70 00:03:08,272 --> 00:03:12,384 And I am fed up with you globalwarming wusses raining on my electric parade! 71 00:03:12,384 --> 00:03:15,529 You can be such an arrogant, ignorant, ass! 72 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,780 So can you! 73 00:03:20,014 --> 00:03:23,054 Good news! It's paint. Bad news. It's not biodegradable. 74 00:03:23,054 --> 00:03:26,078 Nobody comes into my office and ruins my Christmas 75 00:03:26,078 --> 00:03:29,624 with a load of 'Save the Planet' atheist, communist crap! 76 00:03:29,624 --> 00:03:31,311 Off you go now. 77 00:03:35,349 --> 00:03:39,463 Boston Legal 4x10. Green Christmas 78 00:03:39,914 --> 00:03:42,721 제임스 스패이더 (앨런 쇼어 役) 79 00:03:42,721 --> 00:03:44,811 존 라로퀘트 (칼 쌕 役) 80 00:03:44,811 --> 00:03:46,963 크리스찬 클레멘슨 (제리 에스펜슨 役) 81 00:03:46,963 --> 00:03:48,964 게리 앤소니 윌리엄스 (클라렌스 벨 役) 82 00:03:48,964 --> 00:03:51,096 타라 서머스 (케이트 로이드 役) 83 00:03:51,096 --> 00:03:53,158 세프론 버로우즈 (로레인 웰러 役) 84 00:03:53,158 --> 00:03:55,206 타라지 P. 헨슨 (휘트니 롬 役) 85 00:03:55,206 --> 00:03:57,438 캔디스 버겐 (셜리 슈미트 役) 86 00:03:57,438 --> 00:03:59,591 윌리엄 샤트너 (데니 크레인 役) 87 00:04:00,023 --> 00:04:01,825 싱크편집 윤선영(seedyun@nate.com) 88 00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,656 한글번역 박수희(wren79@nate.com) 89 00:04:03,656 --> 00:04:05,060 ORIGINAL AIR DATE ON ABC: 2007/12/18 90 00:04:05,532 --> 00:04:08,008 Aah! These things happen. 91 00:04:08,008 --> 00:04:11,025 An argument between two old friends. You'd understand if you had any. 92 00:04:11,025 --> 00:04:12,313 These things happen? 93 00:04:12,313 --> 00:04:15,317 You often fire on him with a paintball gun? 94 00:04:15,828 --> 00:04:18,934 Am I the only one who's getting a little sick of these greenies? 95 00:04:18,934 --> 00:04:21,781 If they had their way we'd be living in caves like terrorists. 96 00:04:21,781 --> 00:04:23,780 Where's Shirley, by the way? 97 00:04:23,780 --> 00:04:27,290 - I prefer her reprimanding me. - Shirley's in Atlanta at a conference, 98 00:04:27,290 --> 00:04:29,834 ironically, on environmental law. 99 00:04:29,834 --> 00:04:32,308 Denny, this greenie is suing us for fraud. 100 00:04:32,308 --> 00:04:37,092 He claims you misrepresented us as being an environmentally conscience firm. 101 00:04:37,092 --> 00:04:40,979 Oh, send them some Joan Baez tapes tied together with hemp rope. (사회 문제를 노래하는 60대 여가수) 102 00:04:40,979 --> 00:04:44,811 No, they're asking for all the money they've ever paid us in legal fees. 103 00:04:44,811 --> 00:04:49,930 That's in the millions. Plus three times that in punitive damages. 104 00:04:49,930 --> 00:04:51,551 Denny! 105 00:04:56,907 --> 00:05:00,768 Denny, the bigger problem is now that... 106 00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:03,132 all corporations are going green. 107 00:05:03,132 --> 00:05:07,036 We could be shunned if we're perceived as not to be. 108 00:05:07,036 --> 00:05:11,868 That means no more business from anybody. 109 00:05:11,868 --> 00:05:13,880 Whatever. 110 00:05:15,567 --> 00:05:17,391 Clarence. 111 00:05:17,391 --> 00:05:21,167 You've been staring at my pencil cup for about thirty seconds. 112 00:05:21,167 --> 00:05:23,631 Is there something wrong? 113 00:05:23,631 --> 00:05:27,787 I'm too embarrassed to even say. 114 00:05:28,055 --> 00:05:29,907 Just tell me. 115 00:05:30,607 --> 00:05:32,821 I lost my house. 116 00:05:32,821 --> 00:05:36,009 - What? - The bank foreclosed. 117 00:05:36,009 --> 00:05:38,540 - Were you not making payments? - I was. 118 00:05:38,540 --> 00:05:40,243 But... 119 00:05:40,243 --> 00:05:42,358 But what? What happened? 120 00:05:42,358 --> 00:05:45,118 The interest rates just kept exploding. 121 00:05:45,118 --> 00:05:48,019 I bought about three years ago. I didn't have to put anything down. 122 00:05:48,019 --> 00:05:49,770 - You got an adjustable rate. - Yes. 123 00:05:49,770 --> 00:05:51,828 And at first I could make the increases. 124 00:05:51,828 --> 00:05:54,601 And then they went up thirty percent. 125 00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:57,402 And then they went up again. 126 00:05:57,402 --> 00:06:00,320 I'm still paying off student loans from law school. 127 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:04,127 These increases have wiped out my savings and... 128 00:06:04,612 --> 00:06:07,381 I missed the last two months. 129 00:06:07,381 --> 00:06:09,519 - I feel like such an idiot. - And they're foreclosing? 130 00:06:09,519 --> 00:06:10,969 I can't get the bank to even talk to me. 131 00:06:10,969 --> 00:06:12,960 - They're not taking your house. - They're within their rights. 132 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,459 I don't care. They're not taking your house. 133 00:06:16,006 --> 00:06:17,803 It's Christmas. 134 00:06:28,452 --> 00:06:30,916 I can't, Denny. I have a meeting with Clarence. 135 00:06:30,916 --> 00:06:32,651 I don't want Sack defending me. 136 00:06:32,651 --> 00:06:33,985 He won the last time. 137 00:06:33,985 --> 00:06:35,889 Exactly. He'll expect me to be grateful. 138 00:06:35,889 --> 00:06:38,719 The bank is trying to take Clarence's house away. I told him I'd help. 139 00:06:38,719 --> 00:06:42,080 And as for you, I thought you'd agreed to stop shooting people. 140 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,848 - He's an environmentalist. - Even so. 141 00:06:44,848 --> 00:06:47,849 You were hoping to get called on Shirley's carpet again, weren't you? 142 00:06:47,849 --> 00:06:50,867 - That's what this was about. - No, no. I really wanted to shoot him. 143 00:06:50,867 --> 00:06:52,210 Alan? 144 00:06:52,210 --> 00:06:55,023 Your best defense here, Denny, is remorse. Contrition. 145 00:06:55,023 --> 00:06:57,410 You need to look past the fact that he's an environmentalist 146 00:06:57,410 --> 00:07:01,604 and see him as the terrible golfer you've always loved to beat and apologize. 147 00:07:01,604 --> 00:07:03,639 Come on, Clarence. 148 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:08,451 He shot him with a gun? 149 00:07:08,451 --> 00:07:10,814 Paintball. He does that. 150 00:07:11,009 --> 00:07:13,270 And now he's being sued? 151 00:07:14,288 --> 00:07:16,025 You know I've learned, when looking for you, 152 00:07:16,025 --> 00:07:19,919 it's best not to check your office or your desk where you might actually be doing some work. 153 00:07:19,919 --> 00:07:21,551 Yeah, yeah. What do you need? 154 00:07:21,551 --> 00:07:24,402 Clients. They seem like nice clients, need you. 155 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:25,527 They're in the reception waiting. 156 00:07:25,527 --> 00:07:27,823 Can't you get somebody else? 157 00:07:28,584 --> 00:07:30,479 Fine. 158 00:07:31,575 --> 00:07:33,506 Nice suit. 159 00:07:34,126 --> 00:07:38,795 Katie. You'll be joining me in defense of the firm and Denny Crane 160 00:07:38,795 --> 00:07:41,834 whose legacy continues to grow yet more colorful. 161 00:07:41,834 --> 00:07:43,695 My office please. 162 00:07:44,341 --> 00:07:47,952 Well, it seems the paintball assassin is now... 163 00:07:47,952 --> 00:07:49,937 Jerry what's wrong? 164 00:07:49,937 --> 00:07:53,095 - I got dumped. - I'm sorry? 165 00:07:53,095 --> 00:07:58,480 It's a 'Dear John' letter from Leigh. She's leaving me for an iPhone. 166 00:08:00,115 --> 00:08:03,572 Well, first of all, and it goes without saying, 167 00:08:03,572 --> 00:08:06,492 Denny is very sorry for shooting the paintball gun. 168 00:08:06,492 --> 00:08:10,655 Well, that's interesting, because until now it has gone without saying. 169 00:08:10,655 --> 00:08:12,176 Girl. 170 00:08:12,176 --> 00:08:15,286 Denny. What do you have to say? 171 00:08:16,149 --> 00:08:17,897 I'm sorry. 172 00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:19,988 No, you're not, Denny. 173 00:08:19,988 --> 00:08:22,305 And the truth is I don't really care. 174 00:08:22,305 --> 00:08:24,202 Not about the paintball. 175 00:08:24,202 --> 00:08:27,285 But I do care about the environment. 176 00:08:27,285 --> 00:08:30,702 And it's embarrassing to me as a board member of Green People 177 00:08:30,702 --> 00:08:36,227 to look around this office and see it lit up like a nuclear power plant. 178 00:08:36,227 --> 00:08:37,930 Wasteful Christmas decorations. 179 00:08:37,930 --> 00:08:40,711 You make no effort whatsoever to conserve energy. 180 00:08:40,711 --> 00:08:44,683 And this at a time when carbon dioxide is poisoning the planet. 181 00:08:44,683 --> 00:08:46,970 Glaciers are melting. 182 00:08:52,642 --> 00:08:55,087 Is it overzealous on my part? 183 00:08:55,087 --> 00:08:57,079 Maybe. It's all the take... 184 00:08:57,648 --> 00:09:01,132 Dammit! Something keeps hitting me in the face and it hurts. 185 00:09:01,132 --> 00:09:05,120 Why don't we take a break and let cooler heads prevail? 186 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:06,510 Denny! 187 00:09:07,650 --> 00:09:08,825 You're shooting me! 188 00:09:08,825 --> 00:09:11,241 Ah, it's an air gun. Don't be such a girl. 189 00:09:11,241 --> 00:09:12,537 Obnoxious... 190 00:09:12,851 --> 00:09:14,900 - Okay! - Sick! 191 00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:16,222 Second amendment. 192 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:19,162 He was attacking me. I have a right to defend myself. 193 00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,368 Don't I? 194 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,924 Nobody is more devastated about this than I am. 195 00:09:30,924 --> 00:09:34,244 Yes. / I personally executed Mr. Bell's mortgage agreement. 196 00:09:34,244 --> 00:09:37,937 I take enormous pride in being able to help people buy homes. 197 00:09:37,937 --> 00:09:40,849 I was extremely gratified to be able to help Mr. Bell buy his. 198 00:09:40,849 --> 00:09:43,292 And I am deeply saddened for him to be losing it. 199 00:09:43,292 --> 00:09:47,100 Yes. Is it any consolation that you're the one taking it? 200 00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:48,802 I wanted this to work. 201 00:09:48,802 --> 00:09:53,437 We gave Mr. Bell a no-money-down interest-only-two-year-arm at two percent! 202 00:09:53,437 --> 00:09:55,055 It was a fantastic opportunity. 203 00:09:55,055 --> 00:09:57,917 Mr. Chernack, I'm in a bit of a rush so if you don't mind I'd like to cut the crap. 204 00:09:57,917 --> 00:10:00,409 As much as you desperately want the best for Clarence 205 00:10:00,409 --> 00:10:02,539 it seems you've done him the very worst. 206 00:10:02,539 --> 00:10:05,702 You facilitated his buying a house he ultimately couldn't afford. 207 00:10:05,702 --> 00:10:07,455 You then continued to raise his rates. 208 00:10:07,455 --> 00:10:11,338 What was once two percent is now twelve with a balloon payment coming due, 209 00:10:11,338 --> 00:10:14,950 and in the end it seems the bank gets all the money and the house. 210 00:10:14,950 --> 00:10:18,895 And instead of the best, Clarence gets nothing. 211 00:10:18,895 --> 00:10:21,011 I take offense to that. 212 00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:24,340 This man wanted the property and I made it happen for him. 213 00:10:24,340 --> 00:10:26,992 Oh, my goodness. Let's hear it for Mr. Chernack, 214 00:10:26,992 --> 00:10:30,396 this year's MVP in the predator lending department! 215 00:10:30,396 --> 00:10:31,932 I'm sorry. Is there a problem? 216 00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:33,225 Oh, no, don't be silly. 217 00:10:33,225 --> 00:10:36,187 Just celebrating Mr. Chernack's success 218 00:10:36,187 --> 00:10:39,046 with this sub-prime mortgage scam you're currently offering. 219 00:10:39,046 --> 00:10:40,272 And, you are? 220 00:10:40,272 --> 00:10:42,861 Alan Shore representing a scamee. 221 00:10:42,861 --> 00:10:44,085 May we go to my office? 222 00:10:44,085 --> 00:10:47,313 Unless you're serving drinks with your apology and refinancing offer 223 00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:50,029 I think we can settle this in court. 224 00:10:50,029 --> 00:10:52,826 Oh, I think before you get there you'll want to do your discovery 225 00:10:52,826 --> 00:10:54,445 which attorneys typically do. 226 00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:59,516 And you'll find Mr. Shore that this sub-prime debacle isn't just victimizing individuals, 227 00:10:59,516 --> 00:11:01,686 but lending institutions as well. 228 00:11:01,686 --> 00:11:05,404 In fact, over a hundred and sixty major lenders have been put out of business. 229 00:11:05,404 --> 00:11:09,344 Many others, including us are simply trying to survive. 230 00:11:09,344 --> 00:11:12,313 Our stock prices have gone down 95%. 231 00:11:12,313 --> 00:11:14,999 Twenty percent of the mortgages we hold are past due. 232 00:11:14,999 --> 00:11:17,313 The bulk of the others haven't had their rates reset yet. 233 00:11:17,313 --> 00:11:20,372 And in the next two years, it figures to get worse. 234 00:11:20,372 --> 00:11:23,363 But hey, go ahead and sue us. 235 00:11:23,363 --> 00:11:28,583 That's what we need. For a lawyer like you to come in and slap us around a little. 236 00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,424 Now what? 237 00:11:39,731 --> 00:11:43,669 I don't know. We could sue, but, like he said, they've lost money too. 238 00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:45,977 It's not something they wanted to have happen. 239 00:11:45,977 --> 00:11:47,968 It's always the government. Come on, Alan. 240 00:11:47,968 --> 00:11:49,760 This is a Liberal's wet dream. 241 00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:52,706 You get to jump up and scream for more regulations. 242 00:11:52,706 --> 00:11:54,005 Yeah. 243 00:11:54,599 --> 00:11:57,974 Well, I've scheduled a settlement conference with the bank's lawyer. 244 00:11:57,974 --> 00:11:59,842 We'll see what happens. 245 00:12:00,301 --> 00:12:01,988 What about your case? What's happening there? 246 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,240 Trial. We'll win. 247 00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:04,919 Deep down people hate the environment. 248 00:12:04,919 --> 00:12:06,984 I'm not sure that's true, Denny. 249 00:12:06,984 --> 00:12:10,143 Actions speak louder than words. Never mind what we say. 250 00:12:10,143 --> 00:12:12,275 Consider what we do. 251 00:12:12,275 --> 00:12:15,813 It might occasion a discussion of your actions. 252 00:12:16,371 --> 00:12:19,220 Is it time for your annual CAT scan? 253 00:12:19,220 --> 00:12:20,363 Very funny. 254 00:12:20,363 --> 00:12:23,172 Seriously, Denny. Is it time? 255 00:12:23,172 --> 00:12:27,280 There are these new PET scans which are more definitive. 256 00:12:27,888 --> 00:12:30,180 I'm gonna make an appointment. 257 00:12:39,939 --> 00:12:43,373 Well, well! Alan Shore! How the heck are you my good buddy? 258 00:12:43,373 --> 00:12:44,652 I'm fine. Thank you. 259 00:12:44,652 --> 00:12:48,351 A bit surprised, perhaps, to discover we're buddies, but other than that... 260 00:12:48,351 --> 00:12:51,246 Atta boy! You're still a hoot, that's what you are. 261 00:12:51,246 --> 00:12:53,229 Melvin Palmer. How are you, my friend? 262 00:12:53,229 --> 00:12:54,182 Homeless. 263 00:12:54,182 --> 00:12:56,404 Well we're gonna see what we can do about that, 264 00:12:56,404 --> 00:12:57,889 that's what we're gonna do. 265 00:12:57,889 --> 00:12:59,293 Do you know what I like? 266 00:12:59,293 --> 00:13:03,886 I like to eliminate "adversary" from the adversarial process, that's what I like. 267 00:13:03,886 --> 00:13:07,215 Oh, dear. / There is no reason this can't be a win-win. 268 00:13:07,215 --> 00:13:10,127 I mean, we're not the Japanese, now are we? 269 00:13:10,127 --> 00:13:13,692 No. But I can see you're a racist in addition to being my good buddy. 270 00:13:13,692 --> 00:13:15,532 You're a hoot, that's what you are. 271 00:13:15,532 --> 00:13:18,053 Come on, let's all go work this out. 272 00:13:18,053 --> 00:13:22,763 Find a way for my friend Clarence to be home for the holidays. 273 00:13:22,763 --> 00:13:24,787 He gets worse. 274 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:42,919 Jerry, it's very difficult for me to work at my desk knowing you're curled up under yours. 275 00:13:42,919 --> 00:13:45,178 I'm fine. 276 00:13:47,471 --> 00:13:50,720 Have you seen those iPhones? They're very sexy. 277 00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:52,554 Jerry, get up from under your desk, please. 278 00:13:52,554 --> 00:13:56,052 - I'm fine. - Jerry, please! Get up! 279 00:14:00,151 --> 00:14:03,628 Not to mitigate the tragedy which was once your great love, 280 00:14:03,628 --> 00:14:08,558 but Leigh is... well, I believe the American term, a total nut job. 281 00:14:08,558 --> 00:14:11,621 I'm quite sympathetic to the condition of objectaphilia, 282 00:14:11,621 --> 00:14:15,621 but if your girlfriend cheats on you with a clock radio and runs off with an iPhone 283 00:14:15,621 --> 00:14:18,329 she is bonkers and you'd best be done with her. 284 00:14:18,329 --> 00:14:21,057 So stop your whinging and get on with it, would you please? 285 00:14:21,057 --> 00:14:24,478 Either that or go outfit yourself with a nappy. 286 00:14:30,194 --> 00:14:32,082 Bloody hell. 287 00:14:35,339 --> 00:14:38,255 Make sure he goes through the weapons detector as you go into the courthouse. 288 00:14:38,255 --> 00:14:39,854 I heard that. 289 00:14:40,912 --> 00:14:43,495 Carl. I was in your office at six o'clock. 290 00:14:43,495 --> 00:14:46,573 - You were a no show. - I got a little tied up with Denny. 291 00:14:46,573 --> 00:14:48,232 Would you like that? 292 00:14:48,232 --> 00:14:50,388 Let's try eleven o'clock today. 293 00:14:51,571 --> 00:14:52,648 What's happening? 294 00:14:52,648 --> 00:14:54,208 I haven't the slightest idea. 295 00:14:54,208 --> 00:14:56,870 It's a summons, but with no indication as to my fate. 296 00:14:56,870 --> 00:14:59,058 I don't like that it's happening without Shirley. 297 00:14:59,058 --> 00:15:01,018 - Jerry. - Oh, shut up. 298 00:15:01,374 --> 00:15:03,675 - Okay. - Leigh dumped him. 299 00:15:03,675 --> 00:15:05,212 For the clock radio? 300 00:15:05,212 --> 00:15:06,888 iPhone. 301 00:15:06,888 --> 00:15:08,699 They are sexy. 302 00:15:10,603 --> 00:15:12,537 Here's what I'm trying to do, Clarence. 303 00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:16,560 I'm trying to get inside your head. It's what I like to do. 304 00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:19,277 You see, I find the best way to help people with their problem is 305 00:15:19,277 --> 00:15:22,173 to experience where they're coming from. 306 00:15:22,173 --> 00:15:23,975 That suit you okay, my friend? 307 00:15:23,975 --> 00:15:24,985 Fine. 308 00:15:24,985 --> 00:15:29,230 Okay, now, when Mr. Chernack explained this loan... 309 00:15:29,230 --> 00:15:32,033 He didn't really explain it. 310 00:15:32,430 --> 00:15:33,879 Well, you went to law school. 311 00:15:33,879 --> 00:15:37,894 Are you telling me that you signed a legal document without understanding it? 312 00:15:37,894 --> 00:15:40,254 Was it your client's intent to take advantage of him 313 00:15:40,254 --> 00:15:41,811 when it turned out he didn't, Mr. Palmer? 314 00:15:41,811 --> 00:15:45,111 I'm sorry. Melvin. I keep forgetting we're buddies. 315 00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:46,570 - You know what you are? - A hoot. 316 00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:48,723 With a capital H, that's what you are. 317 00:15:48,723 --> 00:15:55,909 Now Clarence, you did understand terms like 'float', and 'balloon', and 'piggyback', and... 318 00:15:55,909 --> 00:15:58,924 Hell, sounds like a birthday party. That's what that does. 319 00:15:58,924 --> 00:16:03,410 But you did understand that your adjustable rate floated with the prime, didn't you? 320 00:16:03,410 --> 00:16:06,135 I certainly had no idea the prime would go through the roof. 321 00:16:06,135 --> 00:16:07,719 Well, nor did the bank. 322 00:16:07,719 --> 00:16:10,326 And nobody expected the housing market to take a dive. 323 00:16:10,326 --> 00:16:13,505 I mean we all got caught with our pants down on that one, didn't we, Al? 324 00:16:13,505 --> 00:16:15,407 I do my best work with my pants down. 325 00:16:15,407 --> 00:16:16,890 But then again, I'm the hoot. 326 00:16:16,890 --> 00:16:21,031 With a capital H, that's what you are. Yeah. 327 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,381 Please sit. 328 00:16:36,413 --> 00:16:39,188 Well... Lorraine. 329 00:16:41,064 --> 00:16:43,760 I did a little survey with the firm. 330 00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:48,849 Between the hundred and seventy-two attorneys currently practicing law at Crane, Poole and Schmidt, 331 00:16:48,849 --> 00:16:52,717 we've managed to rack up convictions in 332 00:16:52,717 --> 00:16:57,741 domestic violence, possession of marijuana, cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, 333 00:16:57,741 --> 00:17:04,092 malicious destruction of property, DUI's, reckless driving and failure to file income tax returns. 334 00:17:04,092 --> 00:17:07,524 That doesn't even include Denny. 335 00:17:07,524 --> 00:17:10,351 You, on the other hand, haven't been convicted of anything. 336 00:17:10,351 --> 00:17:14,688 You also seem to have led a rather model life over the past eight years 337 00:17:14,688 --> 00:17:20,075 setting aside your extra curricular activities in elevators. 338 00:17:22,276 --> 00:17:24,516 Bottom line, you survive for now. 339 00:17:24,516 --> 00:17:27,227 Mainly because Shirley likes you. 340 00:17:27,227 --> 00:17:32,731 And Denny has a particular fondness in his... heart. 341 00:17:32,731 --> 00:17:37,412 If this prior career should take on a public relations life, 342 00:17:37,412 --> 00:17:39,976 we may have to revisit the situation. 343 00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:42,250 But for now... 344 00:17:42,250 --> 00:17:43,806 Thank you. 345 00:17:44,169 --> 00:17:45,851 That's all. 346 00:18:02,299 --> 00:18:05,349 Okay Jerry. Why are you under my desk? 347 00:18:05,819 --> 00:18:08,409 I just came in to be alone. 348 00:18:08,409 --> 00:18:11,074 Would you like me to leave? 349 00:18:16,166 --> 00:18:21,345 He flies around in a private jet. He drives a tank. 350 00:18:21,345 --> 00:18:23,557 This is Crane of Crane, Poole and Schmidt. 351 00:18:23,557 --> 00:18:26,379 The firm does very little to be truly green. 352 00:18:26,379 --> 00:18:28,914 And he told me they did a lot. 353 00:18:28,914 --> 00:18:30,473 Well, this is fraud. 354 00:18:30,473 --> 00:18:32,738 So you've known Denny Crane a long time. 355 00:18:32,738 --> 00:18:35,487 You knew he flew in private jets and so forth. 356 00:18:35,487 --> 00:18:39,349 True. But he told me that he was starting to make sacrifices. 357 00:18:39,349 --> 00:18:43,520 More importantly he told me the firm was green. It's not. 358 00:18:43,520 --> 00:18:44,759 Fraud. 359 00:18:44,759 --> 00:18:48,510 First of all, I'm an enormous admirer of your organization, Green People. 360 00:18:48,510 --> 00:18:51,148 - I think you're all to be congratulated. - Well, thank you. 361 00:18:51,148 --> 00:18:54,155 I do notice, however, the beverage your counsel's drinking. 362 00:18:54,155 --> 00:18:56,147 Do you know sir, that the bottled water industry 363 00:18:56,147 --> 00:19:00,890 uses more than one point five million barrels of crude oil to manufacture their plastic? 364 00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:05,304 I know that we use oil to make products. I do live in this century. 365 00:19:05,304 --> 00:19:07,247 They happen to use a lot of oil. 366 00:19:07,247 --> 00:19:10,047 Enough to fuel a hundred thousand cars for a year. 367 00:19:10,047 --> 00:19:13,338 They also use vast amounts of fossil fuels to distribute their product. 368 00:19:13,338 --> 00:19:17,201 What's worst is less than twenty-five percent of these bottles are actually recycled. 369 00:19:17,201 --> 00:19:20,290 The rest end up in land fills or the ocean. 370 00:19:20,290 --> 00:19:22,437 It's not really green at all to be drinking bottled water. 371 00:19:22,437 --> 00:19:26,242 I'm not about to ask people to go green at the expense of their own health. 372 00:19:26,242 --> 00:19:28,219 Oh, actually, it doesn't serve their health. 373 00:19:28,219 --> 00:19:31,691 Scientists say that bottled water is no better for you than tap. 374 00:19:31,691 --> 00:19:34,706 In fact it could be worse. The EPA standards are looser, 375 00:19:34,706 --> 00:19:37,420 and in some cases the bacterial count is almost double. 376 00:19:37,420 --> 00:19:39,234 This is not a referendum on water. 377 00:19:39,234 --> 00:19:41,074 I beg your pardon. Do you eat meat? 378 00:19:41,074 --> 00:19:43,273 I only ask because studies show eating meat 379 00:19:43,273 --> 00:19:46,169 contributes more to greenhouse gases than driving a car. 380 00:19:46,169 --> 00:19:49,125 Denny says you two often have rib-eyes together. Is that true? 381 00:19:49,125 --> 00:19:50,376 First, 382 00:19:50,376 --> 00:19:54,693 I don't believe that eating meat is worse for the environment than driving a car. 383 00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:55,633 It is. 384 00:19:55,633 --> 00:19:59,616 Contaminated runoff from slaughter houses is a major source of water pollution. 385 00:19:59,616 --> 00:20:03,644 Livestock itself contributes eighteen percent of greenhouse gases just from, 386 00:20:03,644 --> 00:20:05,258 pardon me, farting. 387 00:20:05,258 --> 00:20:08,083 That's more than all the trains, planes and automobiles put together. 388 00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:09,444 Do you eat meat, sir? 389 00:20:09,444 --> 00:20:12,162 I'm not sitting here saying people need to go vegan. 390 00:20:12,162 --> 00:20:15,621 But Denny Crane's firm is assaulting the environment. 391 00:20:15,621 --> 00:20:18,653 I mean the man drives ah, an outrageous gas guzzling mon... 392 00:20:18,653 --> 00:20:21,120 - What do you drive, may I ask? - I drive a hybrid. 393 00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:23,556 Oh, dear. / Oh, what. You're telling me that's bad too? 394 00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:27,092 Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but hybrid batteries contain nickel 395 00:20:27,092 --> 00:20:30,779 that is mined and smelted in a plant in Sudbury, Ontario. 396 00:20:30,779 --> 00:20:34,432 A plant that has caused so much environmental damage and acid rain 397 00:20:34,432 --> 00:20:39,214 that NASA uses the so-called dead-zone around the plant to test its moon rovers. 398 00:20:39,214 --> 00:20:42,004 I think a board member of Green People might know that. 399 00:20:42,004 --> 00:20:46,445 That nickel then has to be shipped off via massive containers to a refinery in Europe, 400 00:20:46,445 --> 00:20:50,362 then off to China to be made into nickel foam then to Japan to be manufactured, 401 00:20:50,362 --> 00:20:53,079 then finally all the way back to America! 402 00:20:53,079 --> 00:20:56,676 All that, just to put a single hybrid battery into a car. 403 00:20:56,676 --> 00:21:00,568 When you combine all the energy it takes to build and drive a hybrid it 404 00:21:00,568 --> 00:21:03,994 adds up to almost fifty percent more than it does to build and drive a Hummer. 405 00:21:03,994 --> 00:21:06,190 They also save on fuel. 406 00:21:06,190 --> 00:21:07,639 In terms of money perhaps, 407 00:21:07,639 --> 00:21:10,517 but because they do, studies show people are driving more. 408 00:21:10,517 --> 00:21:14,122 Hybrids might result in more fuel consumption than gas cars. 409 00:21:14,122 --> 00:21:16,289 I imagine you do know that? 410 00:21:16,857 --> 00:21:19,478 - No? - I love it. 411 00:21:21,639 --> 00:21:23,331 Sorry. 412 00:21:25,183 --> 00:21:29,337 My point is you can blame us all you want, my friend. 413 00:21:29,337 --> 00:21:30,918 But nobody saw this coming. 414 00:21:30,918 --> 00:21:35,325 Even Alan Greenspan was saying there were no bubbles in the housing market. 415 00:21:35,325 --> 00:21:37,669 Is Alan Greenspan your good buddy too? 416 00:21:37,669 --> 00:21:40,106 I hear he can be quite the hoot. 417 00:21:40,106 --> 00:21:43,037 Al, I really don't need you to make fun of me. 418 00:21:43,037 --> 00:21:44,368 No! You don't. 419 00:21:44,368 --> 00:21:48,733 The simple fact is this was a negotiable contract. He's a lawyer. 420 00:21:48,733 --> 00:21:50,164 Those are two facts actually. 421 00:21:50,164 --> 00:21:52,675 What happened to the sub-prime was unforeseeable. 422 00:21:52,675 --> 00:21:55,554 What happened to the housing market was unforeseeable. 423 00:21:55,554 --> 00:21:58,294 When do we get to the win-win part of this meeting? 424 00:21:58,294 --> 00:22:01,268 This man was never lied to. He made a deal. 425 00:22:01,268 --> 00:22:03,813 Now he doesn't like it because it turned out to be a bad deal. 426 00:22:03,813 --> 00:22:06,338 So what? He just stops making his payments? 427 00:22:06,338 --> 00:22:09,764 It seems to me he deserves to lose the house. 428 00:22:09,764 --> 00:22:12,426 You think you can sue and win, Al, 429 00:22:12,426 --> 00:22:15,446 even though he flat out breached a contract? 430 00:22:15,446 --> 00:22:19,481 I'm asking myself, "What kind of a lawyer would think that?" 431 00:22:19,481 --> 00:22:23,539 That's what I ask. But then I remember, 432 00:22:23,539 --> 00:22:29,777 you're not so much a lawyer as you are a gigantic hoot. 433 00:22:29,777 --> 00:22:32,110 Am I right? 434 00:22:32,842 --> 00:22:37,112 I may not be much of a lawyer Mr. Palmer but I can see the obvious. 435 00:22:37,112 --> 00:22:41,120 Foreclose on Mr. Bell's house and your client will be left holding an asset 436 00:22:41,120 --> 00:22:44,870 he can't sell and a loan that will never be paid off. 437 00:22:44,870 --> 00:22:50,762 Over the next eighteen months two million of these teaser mortgages are going to expire. 438 00:22:50,762 --> 00:22:54,707 And a trillion dollars' worth of loans are going to be called in 439 00:22:54,707 --> 00:22:59,026 as interest rates keep taking up and property values keep slipping down. 440 00:22:59,026 --> 00:23:03,704 That trillion dollars' worth of debt is going to be secured by houses worth a fraction of that. 441 00:23:03,704 --> 00:23:07,619 Keep throwing people out on the street, taking their homes instead of their money 442 00:23:07,619 --> 00:23:11,461 and you'll be left with a stock price of zero and a public that's out for blood. 443 00:23:11,461 --> 00:23:15,851 Not mine, or his but yours and... 444 00:23:15,851 --> 00:23:17,179 yours. 445 00:23:17,179 --> 00:23:20,782 You can smell it in the air. Anger and chaos. 446 00:23:20,782 --> 00:23:22,748 If Shakespeare were alive today he might say, 447 00:23:22,748 --> 00:23:26,329 "First thing. Let's kill all the bankers." 448 00:23:26,708 --> 00:23:31,769 Tell me, Melvin, what exactly do you plan to trade on in that courtroom? 449 00:23:31,769 --> 00:23:35,230 Your witless grin and home-style cookin'? 450 00:23:35,230 --> 00:23:38,693 Or perhaps the bank industry's stellar reputation. 451 00:23:38,693 --> 00:23:40,811 The FBI has already claimed mortgage fraud 452 00:23:40,811 --> 00:23:44,041 as the fastest growing white-collar crime in America. 453 00:23:44,041 --> 00:23:47,252 In some cites even drug dealers have turned to mortgage lending. 454 00:23:47,252 --> 00:23:49,588 Profits are high. Death rate is low. 455 00:23:49,588 --> 00:23:53,604 Until, of course, people start shooting the suits. 456 00:23:54,056 --> 00:23:56,280 I may not know much about law 457 00:23:56,280 --> 00:24:00,843 but even a gigantic hoot like me knows cases always come down to emotion. 458 00:24:00,843 --> 00:24:04,563 Who do you think the jury's heart will go out to on this one? 459 00:24:04,563 --> 00:24:10,013 I've got a man who's lost his home and his entire life's savings. 460 00:24:10,461 --> 00:24:12,582 You've got a bank. 461 00:24:19,647 --> 00:24:24,257 These images here are basically microscopic plaques of debris, 462 00:24:24,257 --> 00:24:28,095 tangles of nerve endings containing a protein called tau. 463 00:24:28,095 --> 00:24:32,087 Up to now, we've only be able to view these kind of tissue tangles in autopsies. 464 00:24:32,087 --> 00:24:33,796 So, what are you saying? I'm dead? 465 00:24:33,796 --> 00:24:36,894 No. I'm just saying with the latest PET scan developments 466 00:24:36,894 --> 00:24:39,422 we are now seeing things we never thought possible. 467 00:24:39,422 --> 00:24:41,689 It's beyond innovation. This is really the cutting edge. 468 00:24:41,689 --> 00:24:44,634 Look. Just tell me what all this crap means. 469 00:24:44,634 --> 00:24:47,828 Well, you have MCI. But that doesn't mean... 470 00:24:47,828 --> 00:24:51,365 I've got AT&T. I know my phone service. I'm not that far gone. 471 00:24:51,365 --> 00:24:54,358 No. MCI stands for Mild Cognitive Impairment. 472 00:24:54,358 --> 00:24:57,233 And this debris here represents signs of MCI. 473 00:24:57,233 --> 00:24:59,672 Did I not just tell him I have AT&T? 474 00:24:59,672 --> 00:25:01,735 So, is this Alzheimers? 475 00:25:01,735 --> 00:25:03,960 Could be the early stages. Nothing definitive. 476 00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:08,314 Sometimes MCI is a transition stage between normal aging and Alzheimer's. 477 00:25:08,314 --> 00:25:10,366 Other times it's just normal aging. 478 00:25:10,366 --> 00:25:13,281 We see this in about twenty-nine percent of people under eight-five. 479 00:25:13,281 --> 00:25:16,992 Of those people roughly twelve percent progress to Alzheimer's each year. 480 00:25:16,992 --> 00:25:19,842 Do I look like Rainman? Just crunch the numbers for me! 481 00:25:19,842 --> 00:25:21,578 Well... 482 00:25:21,578 --> 00:25:25,347 In about six years eighty percent have Alzheimer's. 483 00:25:27,585 --> 00:25:31,444 So, let me understand what we have here. 484 00:25:32,286 --> 00:25:37,760 I have an eighty percent chance of getting Alzheimer's in six years? 485 00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:39,605 Yes. 486 00:25:43,147 --> 00:25:46,024 If it's any consolation at all, 487 00:25:46,024 --> 00:25:49,737 you're seventy-five. You drink. You smoke. 488 00:25:49,737 --> 00:25:52,514 You probably won't live that long. 489 00:26:04,929 --> 00:26:08,399 Denny Crane wasn't honest. 490 00:26:08,399 --> 00:26:12,249 He told Walter Bonner that Crane, Poole and Schmidt was a green firm. 491 00:26:12,249 --> 00:26:14,146 It wasn't. I don't know about you, 492 00:26:14,146 --> 00:26:19,262 but I'm a little sick of the wide-spread practice of the tell-the-customer-what-he-wants-to hear, 493 00:26:19,262 --> 00:26:21,516 whatever-it-takes-to-get-the-account mentality. 494 00:26:21,516 --> 00:26:24,337 It's fraud! They're not green. 495 00:26:24,337 --> 00:26:26,818 It's bait and switch. It's wrong. 496 00:26:26,818 --> 00:26:30,659 These people need to be held accountable for their lies and deception. 497 00:26:30,659 --> 00:26:33,868 You have to help hold them accountable. 498 00:26:33,868 --> 00:26:40,352 Even if my client eats meat and I drink bottled water. 499 00:26:50,238 --> 00:26:54,794 It's hard to know what the hell is good for the environment these days. 500 00:26:56,877 --> 00:26:59,162 One minute we're being told, 501 00:26:59,162 --> 00:27:02,962 "Eat farmed salmon to spare the wild stocks." 502 00:27:02,962 --> 00:27:04,977 While another study says, 503 00:27:04,977 --> 00:27:08,742 "That may be the worst thing we can do for the wild salmon." 504 00:27:08,742 --> 00:27:10,707 There's a new study out that says 505 00:27:10,707 --> 00:27:16,665 people contribute more to greenhouse gas emissions by walking than by driving. 506 00:27:16,665 --> 00:27:18,962 Because the increased energy it takes to walk 507 00:27:18,962 --> 00:27:23,955 makes people eat more which causes the proliferation of slaughter houses. 508 00:27:23,955 --> 00:27:27,624 Ridiculous? It could be. 509 00:27:27,624 --> 00:27:29,660 Everyone talks about ethanol. 510 00:27:29,660 --> 00:27:35,160 Well, it turns out, to fill one SUV with pure ethanol 511 00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:38,549 would require four hundred and fifty pounds of corn. 512 00:27:38,549 --> 00:27:43,913 Or roughly the amount of calories to feed a person for a year. 513 00:27:43,913 --> 00:27:45,445 That's just one tank full. 514 00:27:45,445 --> 00:27:50,178 We've heard how hybrid cars may not be all they're cracked up to be. 515 00:27:50,178 --> 00:27:56,103 I mean, the information can sometimes become so contradictory it's confusing. 516 00:27:56,103 --> 00:28:01,967 And as a consequence, easy to feel overwhelmed and an utter sense of futility. 517 00:28:01,967 --> 00:28:05,973 Especially when people are running around screaming, "The end is near!" 518 00:28:05,973 --> 00:28:09,391 One thing that really would be helpful is if all the Chicken Little's 519 00:28:09,391 --> 00:28:15,038 would just stop yelling, "Doom!" and calm down. 520 00:28:15,038 --> 00:28:17,703 And instead promote a little common sense. 521 00:28:17,703 --> 00:28:20,490 We're not gonna stop driving cars. 522 00:28:20,490 --> 00:28:24,332 People are not going to give up meat. 523 00:28:24,332 --> 00:28:25,917 Or Christmas. 524 00:28:25,917 --> 00:28:30,128 Now we can stop eating farmed salmon. 525 00:28:30,128 --> 00:28:34,668 We can recycle. We can drive less. 526 00:28:34,668 --> 00:28:39,401 We can use florescent light bulbs. Little things. 527 00:28:39,401 --> 00:28:45,811 Maybe if we get the message out that the little things really make a difference, 528 00:28:45,811 --> 00:28:47,717 we'll all start doing them. 529 00:28:47,717 --> 00:28:52,040 But suing people for not doing enough. 530 00:28:52,344 --> 00:28:54,647 This is silly, isn't it? 531 00:29:05,011 --> 00:29:07,896 I wasn't listening. Any good? 532 00:29:13,789 --> 00:29:15,343 Hello, Jerry. 533 00:29:16,510 --> 00:29:18,115 Busy. 534 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,067 Jerry? 535 00:29:25,854 --> 00:29:28,542 What? Improper to make fun of the disabled? 536 00:29:28,542 --> 00:29:30,089 You're not disabled, Jerry. 537 00:29:30,089 --> 00:29:34,203 You're a very abled man who happens to have Asperser's and a few eccentric ticks, 538 00:29:34,203 --> 00:29:37,442 but you're intelligent. And you're mainstream. 539 00:29:37,442 --> 00:29:40,337 And when it comes to finding a romantic partner? 540 00:29:40,337 --> 00:29:43,730 It's simply wrong for you to reduce your playing field to people who suffer mental disorders 541 00:29:43,730 --> 00:29:46,499 which Leigh Swift very much does. 542 00:29:46,499 --> 00:29:51,535 With all due respect to objectaphilia, she needs medical attention. 543 00:29:51,535 --> 00:29:54,687 For God's sake, you cannot be expected to compete with a gadget. 544 00:29:54,687 --> 00:29:59,056 You need to start setting your sights a little higher. 545 00:29:59,056 --> 00:30:01,368 That would make a lovely Valentine's movie. 546 00:30:01,368 --> 00:30:02,479 But in the real world... 547 00:30:02,479 --> 00:30:04,874 Real world? Women fall in love with men who beat them. 548 00:30:04,874 --> 00:30:06,415 Men fall in love with their mothers. 549 00:30:06,415 --> 00:30:10,809 Love is the most inexplicable, unscientific, irrational of all phenomena. 550 00:30:10,809 --> 00:30:13,664 The only thing we know for sure is it can happen to anyone. 551 00:30:13,664 --> 00:30:15,094 It usually does. 552 00:30:15,094 --> 00:30:20,869 For you to be moping around with the idea it never will for you is simply unacceptable. 553 00:30:27,509 --> 00:30:29,983 - Okay. - Okay. Fine. 554 00:30:29,983 --> 00:30:32,718 Actually I'm writing a letter to Leigh now. To get closure. 555 00:30:32,718 --> 00:30:33,684 Excellent. 556 00:30:33,684 --> 00:30:35,261 I thought it best to keep it short. 557 00:30:35,261 --> 00:30:37,943 But I'm wondering if it's a little too short. May I read it to you? 558 00:30:37,943 --> 00:30:39,551 Of course. 559 00:30:43,036 --> 00:30:49,203 "Dear Leigh, Go to Hell. Sincerely, Jerry." 560 00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:54,210 It is a bit short. 561 00:30:56,199 --> 00:31:00,382 This offer in no way represents any admission of liability on our part. 562 00:31:00,382 --> 00:31:04,980 But rather the charity that runs through my client's heart. 563 00:31:04,980 --> 00:31:08,802 - To the Christmas season itself. - Oh, Santa. 564 00:31:09,166 --> 00:31:12,130 If your client brings his payments schedule current 565 00:31:12,130 --> 00:31:15,542 we will hold off on foreclosure. 566 00:31:15,542 --> 00:31:17,634 - Rejected. - What? 567 00:31:17,634 --> 00:31:19,459 This, this is a gift! 568 00:31:19,459 --> 00:31:21,157 Because you're my buddy, yes. 569 00:31:21,157 --> 00:31:23,502 And since no gift should go unpunished, these are the terms. 570 00:31:23,502 --> 00:31:26,607 He gets sixty days to bring his scheduled payments current 571 00:31:26,607 --> 00:31:28,996 and from there on he gets a fixed rate at eight. 572 00:31:28,996 --> 00:31:30,906 Eight! Why on earth would we...? 573 00:31:30,906 --> 00:31:34,575 Because you gave him two with the implied promise that it would fluctuate, 574 00:31:34,575 --> 00:31:36,981 - but certainly not detonate. - I'm sorry but... 575 00:31:36,981 --> 00:31:41,956 Not nearly as sorry as you'll be if you take your chances with me in court. 576 00:31:41,956 --> 00:31:45,308 - My friend... - I am not your friend. 577 00:31:45,308 --> 00:31:49,954 I find the possibility of such a friendship vile. 578 00:31:49,954 --> 00:31:53,515 Your best hope, Mr. Milk, is that the first sub-prime lawsuit is 579 00:31:53,515 --> 00:31:55,823 brought against you by a buffoon like Mr. Palmer. 580 00:31:55,823 --> 00:32:00,084 You do not want the precedent set by me because I will get you. 581 00:32:00,084 --> 00:32:05,803 Search my eyes, Mr. Milk. This is what the truth looks like. 582 00:32:09,185 --> 00:32:10,394 Nine percent. 583 00:32:10,394 --> 00:32:13,406 Let's split the difference. Call it eight. 584 00:32:16,190 --> 00:32:18,210 - Make the deal. - Ah, Noris! I assure you... 585 00:32:18,210 --> 00:32:20,278 Make the deal! 586 00:32:24,439 --> 00:32:27,686 You have some dog doo on your shoe. 587 00:32:36,558 --> 00:32:41,527 ♪ Out of all the reindeers you know you're the mastermind ♪ 588 00:32:42,576 --> 00:32:47,722 ♪ Said run, run Rudolph, Randolph isn't far behind ♪ 589 00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:50,111 Merry Christmas. 590 00:32:50,111 --> 00:32:51,446 Hey, hey, hey! 591 00:32:51,446 --> 00:32:53,920 - You remember Doris? - Yes, of course. How are you? 592 00:32:53,920 --> 00:32:56,512 - Fine. - Doris is gonna sing a song later. 593 00:32:56,512 --> 00:32:59,782 Fantastic! Doris, this is Denny. 594 00:32:59,782 --> 00:33:01,577 Stop it. 595 00:33:01,806 --> 00:33:05,411 Alan. I don't know how to thank you. 596 00:33:05,411 --> 00:33:07,662 Then why don't' we skip it? 597 00:33:09,098 --> 00:33:13,951 ♪ Said Santa to a girl child "What would please you most to get?" ♪ 598 00:33:14,949 --> 00:33:20,282 ♪ "A little baby doll that can cry, sleep drink and wet" ♪ 599 00:33:21,125 --> 00:33:23,434 - Hello, Jerry. - Lorraine! Hello! 600 00:33:23,434 --> 00:33:25,290 Well! Hello! 601 00:33:26,251 --> 00:33:29,618 I heard you'll be staying. I'm very pleased. 602 00:33:29,618 --> 00:33:32,924 That's very nice of you to say. Thank you, Jerry. 603 00:33:38,601 --> 00:33:40,036 Is that a mercy kiss? 604 00:33:40,036 --> 00:33:43,313 A mercy kiss? Don't be ridiculous. 605 00:33:43,313 --> 00:33:45,316 That was mistletoe. 606 00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:51,592 - Merry Christmas, Jerry. - You too! 607 00:33:51,592 --> 00:33:53,475 Happy holidays. 608 00:33:59,969 --> 00:34:01,769 Where the hell were you? 609 00:34:02,082 --> 00:34:04,258 I lost interest. Did we win? 610 00:34:04,591 --> 00:34:06,787 We did, actually, the jury found for us. 611 00:34:06,787 --> 00:34:09,337 See? I told you. Deep down people hate the environment. 612 00:34:09,337 --> 00:34:12,608 That wasn't it, Denny. But you're welcome. 613 00:34:13,017 --> 00:34:14,653 Thank you. 614 00:34:21,203 --> 00:34:23,044 Merry Christmas. 615 00:34:24,330 --> 00:34:27,005 Merry Christmas, Denny. 616 00:34:33,707 --> 00:34:39,806 ♪ Maybe it's much too early in the game ♪ 617 00:34:39,806 --> 00:34:43,167 ♪ Ooh, but I thought I'd ask you just the same ♪ 618 00:34:43,167 --> 00:34:45,733 Hello! Happy Holidays! Hello. 619 00:34:45,733 --> 00:34:47,418 Hello, Jerry. 620 00:34:47,418 --> 00:34:49,544 I was wondering if you'd like to dance? 621 00:34:49,544 --> 00:34:50,947 I'd love to. 622 00:34:50,947 --> 00:34:53,221 What am I? Chopped liver? 623 00:34:53,221 --> 00:34:56,083 Maybe Whitney could have the next dance? / Of course! Hello. 624 00:34:56,083 --> 00:34:57,114 Welcome. 625 00:34:57,114 --> 00:35:00,543 I'll be waiting right here for you Jerryboy. 626 00:35:06,995 --> 00:35:09,396 Would you like to dance, Whitney? 627 00:35:11,049 --> 00:35:15,063 Okay, Clarence. Don't you try anything. 628 00:35:17,390 --> 00:35:23,116 ♪ New Year's Eve? ♪ 629 00:35:24,590 --> 00:35:30,669 ♪ Maybe I'm crazy to suppose ♪ 630 00:35:30,669 --> 00:35:37,265 ♪ I'd ever be the one you chose ♪ 631 00:35:37,265 --> 00:35:42,844 ♪ Out of the thousand invitations ♪ 632 00:35:42,844 --> 00:35:48,235 ♪ You received ♪ 633 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,355 Can you imagine the nerve of that doctor 634 00:35:51,355 --> 00:35:55,086 telling me I wouldn't live long enough to get Alzheimer's? 635 00:35:55,086 --> 00:35:57,289 I'll make it. You watch. 636 00:35:57,289 --> 00:36:01,297 What are the odds of somebody getting Mad Cow and Alzheimer's? 637 00:36:01,297 --> 00:36:03,062 Right. 638 00:36:04,285 --> 00:36:06,971 See? I feel good. 639 00:36:06,971 --> 00:36:11,548 I think it's good to live life as though it were a finite thing. Cause, it is. 640 00:36:11,548 --> 00:36:13,995 I appreciate today. 641 00:36:14,595 --> 00:36:18,316 And tomorrow I'll wake up, 642 00:36:18,316 --> 00:36:21,339 and there'll be another day to savor. 643 00:36:22,666 --> 00:36:26,608 And after it I'll go to bed and I'll wake and there'll be another. 644 00:36:26,608 --> 00:36:30,213 And another. And another. And a... 645 00:36:32,788 --> 00:36:39,206 Besides, I can reverse this MCI thing. Any time I want. 646 00:36:39,206 --> 00:36:40,252 You can? 647 00:36:40,252 --> 00:36:41,479 I've ready a study. 648 00:36:41,479 --> 00:36:43,766 Blood goes to your brain. Blood goes to your penis. 649 00:36:43,766 --> 00:36:45,300 But not at the same time. 650 00:36:45,300 --> 00:36:49,550 So I wanna hone my mental skills? I just cut down on the sex. 651 00:36:49,550 --> 00:36:53,213 Question is, "Is it really worth it?" 652 00:36:54,087 --> 00:36:56,844 I think Plato once asked that. 653 00:36:59,572 --> 00:37:03,038 Don't you love Christmas? 654 00:37:04,439 --> 00:37:08,281 Anything goes wrong with the world, Christmas makes it go away. 655 00:37:08,281 --> 00:37:10,588 Decorations. 656 00:37:10,588 --> 00:37:12,528 Carols. 657 00:37:13,423 --> 00:37:15,524 The tree. 658 00:37:16,101 --> 00:37:19,446 I don't tell this to too many people, 659 00:37:19,446 --> 00:37:22,479 but I once had sex with a Christmas tree. 660 00:37:23,039 --> 00:37:24,968 Not a real tree. 661 00:37:24,968 --> 00:37:29,601 When I was in college my parents had one of those Christmas masquerade party things. 662 00:37:29,601 --> 00:37:33,886 And ah, Diana Corlock, I think I mentioned her to you, 663 00:37:33,886 --> 00:37:41,338 she brought her slutty cousin along and she was dressed so beautifully in a... 664 00:37:41,338 --> 00:37:45,359 she had the popcorn strings around her, and icicles, 665 00:37:45,359 --> 00:37:49,001 and candy cane from both... 666 00:37:49,647 --> 00:37:52,366 She was magic. 667 00:37:52,914 --> 00:37:56,292 So! Up to the room. 668 00:37:56,292 --> 00:37:59,967 And my mother walked in and caught me humping a tree. 669 00:38:00,732 --> 00:38:02,310 That was trouble. 670 00:38:02,310 --> 00:38:07,604 And she was already mad at me for suckin' face with the Virgin Mary under a mistletoe. 671 00:38:07,975 --> 00:38:10,394 That was a tough party. 672 00:38:13,660 --> 00:38:16,402 Have you bought my present yet? 673 00:38:16,402 --> 00:38:17,984 Well, it's still a little early. 674 00:38:17,984 --> 00:38:20,145 I know what I want. 675 00:38:20,145 --> 00:38:21,290 Tell me. 676 00:38:21,290 --> 00:38:25,723 Well, I saw you dancing close with Lorraine. 677 00:38:25,723 --> 00:38:29,976 A lot closer than I'll ever get, but I've resigned myself to that. 678 00:38:29,976 --> 00:38:35,783 And her perfume rubbed off on you. I can smell it from here. 679 00:38:35,783 --> 00:38:37,587 And? 680 00:38:38,342 --> 00:38:41,949 Alan. Can I smell you? 681 00:38:44,452 --> 00:38:48,212 - That's all you want for Christmas? - Please. 682 00:38:49,761 --> 00:38:52,841 - Better not try anything. - I won't! 683 00:38:52,841 --> 00:38:56,612 Just wanna drink you in a little. 684 00:38:58,110 --> 00:38:59,936 And pretend. 685 00:39:03,258 --> 00:39:05,644 Oh, my. 686 00:39:05,976 --> 00:39:07,921 What's this perfume on you? 687 00:39:07,921 --> 00:39:10,907 It's from one of the go-go dancers. 688 00:39:11,215 --> 00:39:13,390 It's very good. Wow. 689 00:39:13,390 --> 00:39:14,878 Alan. 690 00:39:14,878 --> 00:39:19,765 Don't talk. It makes it harder to pretend you're Lorraine. 691 00:39:19,765 --> 00:39:21,379 Did she say what it was, this go-go girl? 692 00:39:21,379 --> 00:39:24,775 Smell all you want, Alan, just don't talk. 693 00:39:26,936 --> 00:39:30,020 May I say just one thing since this is my gift? 694 00:39:30,020 --> 00:39:31,790 What? 695 00:39:32,394 --> 00:39:34,912 Merry Christmas, Denny. 696 00:39:39,828 --> 00:39:42,243 Merry Christmas, my friend. 697 00:39:50,015 --> 00:39:53,035 번역수정 김난주(nanjidoo@nate.com) 698 00:39:53,035 --> 00:39:56,009 한글교정 도정원(winniedo@nate.com) 699 00:39:59,098 --> 00:40:01,651 자막제작 - NSC 자막팀 (http://club.nate.com/tsm) 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net