1 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,000 - So what do you think? - It's nice. 2 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:09,600 But do you think Cordelia will like it? 3 00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:12,240 I don't know. Does she know what one of these is? 4 00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:16,760 OK, big yucks. When are you gonna stop makin' fun of me for dating Cordelia? 5 00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:19,480 I'm sorry. But never. 6 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:23,240 I just think you could find somebody more... better. 7 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:26,160 Yeah. Parallel universe, maybe. 8 00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:30,120 Here the only other person I'm interested in is, um, unavailable. 9 00:00:31,320 --> 00:00:33,720 Besides, Cordy and I are really gettin' along. 10 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:38,520 Yesterday we sat together, not even speakin'. You know, just enjoying comfortable silence. 11 00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:43,160 Man, that was dull. 12 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,080 I'm glad that you guys are getting along. Almost really. 13 00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:47,920 And don't stress over the gift. 14 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:52,440 It's new territory for me. My valentines are usually met with heartfelt restraining orders. 15 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:54,760 She'll love it. 16 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:59,400 I wish dating was like slaying - simple, direct, stake to the heart, no muss, no fuss. 17 00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:34,760 Sorry to say, Xand. Slaying is a tad more perilous than dating. 18 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:38,000 Well, you're obviously not dating Cordelia. 19 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:43,880 Wait up! 20 00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:45,640 Hey, wait up! 21 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:49,920 Excuse me? Where's the fire sale? 22 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,240 Oh, sorry. Didn't see you. 23 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:54,960 You didn't call back last night to talk about dance outfits. 24 00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:57,560 I'm wearing red and black, so you need to switch. 25 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:00,760 Red and black? Is that what Xander likes? 26 00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:05,160 - Xander? What does he have to do with this? - Well, a girl wants to look good for her geek. 27 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:10,640 - Xander's just... - When'll you start wearing matching outfits? 28 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,040 Cos I'm planning to vomit. Let's go. 29 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:18,680 Papers on my desk. 30 00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:23,040 Anybody tries to leave without giving me a paper is looking at a failing grade. 31 00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:26,560 This time I'm ready for ya. No F for Xander today. 32 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:30,680 No, this baby's my ticket to a sweet D minus. 33 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:32,840 - Hey, Amy. - Hey. 34 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,840 You guys goin' to the Valentine's Day dance at the Bronze? 35 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:39,960 - Go ahead, you know you wanna say it. - My boyfriend's in the band. 36 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,520 - Cool! - I think you've now told everybody. 37 00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:45,440 - Only in this hemisphere. - What about you? 38 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:49,480 Valentine's Day is just a cheap gimmick to sell cards and chocolate. 39 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:53,120 Bad break-up, huh? 40 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,080 Believe me when I say "Uh-huh". 41 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:00,400 Thank you. Thank you. 42 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:09,200 Thank you, Amy. 43 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:17,680 I just hate to think of you solo on Valentine's Day. 44 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:22,760 I'll be fine. Mom and I'll have a pig-out. It's a time-honoured tradition among the loveless. 45 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:25,400 - Did you guys see that? - See what? 46 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:28,000 In class. I think Amy worked some magic on Miss Beakman. 47 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:30,640 - You mean like witchcraft? - Her mom's a witch. 48 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:34,560 An amateur psycho. Amy shouldn't be messing with that stuff. 49 00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,400 - Maybe I should go talk to her. - Buffy? Buffy? 50 00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:40,120 - Might I have a word? - Have a sentence even. 51 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:43,800 - Oh, good. Well... - Back it up before you leave. 52 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:51,680 - Rupert. - Ms Calendar. 53 00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:59,120 I'm glad we ran into each other, actually. I was hoping that we could, uh... 54 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,760 Do you have a minute? 55 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:06,880 Actually, not just now. Erm, I have a matter to discuss with... with Buffy. 56 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:11,320 Right. Let's go. 57 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,160 Are you OK? 58 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,320 Me? I'll... I'll be fine. 59 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,320 Um, I was more concerned about you, actually. 60 00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:42,880 Since Angel, erm, turned... 61 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:46,560 ..I've been reading up on his earlier activities. 62 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,040 You know, feeding patterns and the like. 63 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:52,560 And? 64 00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:56,560 Around Valentine's Day he's rather prone to... 65 00:05:56,960 --> 00:06:01,240 ..well, erm, brutal displays of... he would think of it as affection, I suppose. 66 00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:06,120 - Like what? - No... no need to go into details. 67 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,400 - That bad? - Suffice it to say, I think it would be best... 68 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:13,320 ..if you stayed off the streets for a few nights. 69 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:17,880 I'll, erm... I'll patrol. You know, keep an eye on things. 70 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:23,560 Better safe than sorry. 71 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,520 It's a little late for both. 72 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:36,120 Fancy it, pet? 73 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:39,760 It's beautiful. 74 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,680 Nothing but the best for my gir... 75 00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:50,760 Happy Valentine's Day, Dru. 76 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,040 Angel! 77 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:57,800 It's still warm. 78 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,280 I knew you'd like it. 79 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,000 I found it in a quaint little shopgirl. 80 00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:12,120 Cute. 81 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:15,720 Here. 82 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:20,920 I'll get it. 83 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:23,880 Done. 84 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,160 I know Dru gives you pity access... 85 00:07:26,720 --> 00:07:29,400 ..but you have to admit it's easier when I do things for her! 86 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,120 You would do well to worry less about Dru... 87 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:37,040 ..and more about that slayer you've been tramping around with. 88 00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:39,320 Dear Buffy. Hm. 89 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:42,040 I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards. 90 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:46,040 Why don't you rip her lungs out? That might make an impression. 91 00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:48,480 Lacks poetry. 92 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:50,680 It doesn't have to. 93 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,600 What rhymes with lungs? 94 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,040 Don't worry, Spike. 95 00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:59,720 Angel always knows... 96 00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:03,960 ..what speaks to a girl's heart. 97 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:27,160 # Feelin' I've been lost for years 98 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:31,080 # You can never understand me 99 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:34,120 # Unless you've seen those tears 100 00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:38,080 # But you never get to sleep 101 00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,160 # When I'm away 102 00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:43,920 # I don't mind... 103 00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:45,880 Oz has his cool hair today. 104 00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:48,880 I think I'm a groupie! 105 00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:57,280 Oh, hey! 106 00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:02,080 Let's get outta here. 107 00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:10,920 Here. 108 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,560 Mom? 109 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:34,320 Mom? 110 00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:48,520 - Buffy, it's me. - Yeah. You just startled me a little. 111 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,960 I was just checking the back door. Somebody left these for you. 112 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:08,800 # Hey! 113 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:12,120 # I can't sleep 114 00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:15,440 # Hey! 115 00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:19,120 # I can't sleep 116 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,160 # Hey! 117 00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:25,000 # I can't sleep 118 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,320 - Hey. - Your clothes. You look so good. 119 00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:35,840 Oh. I let Buffy dress me. 120 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,200 - Well, not physically. - Perfect. 121 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:41,400 Had to make this harder, didn't you? 122 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:44,760 Clearly the fact I please you visually has got us off on the wrong foot. 123 00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:47,680 - Xander... - Let me finish. 124 00:10:48,920 --> 00:10:51,040 I've been thinking a lot about us lately. 125 00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:53,240 The why and the wherefore. 126 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:57,800 You know, once, twice. A kissy here, a kissy there. 127 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,080 And you can chalk it all up to hormones. 128 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:05,560 And maybe that's all we have here - tawdry, teen lust. 129 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,280 But maybe not. 130 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:11,640 Maybe something in you sees something special inside me, and vice versa. 131 00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:15,640 I mean, I think I do. See something. 132 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:18,720 So... 133 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:21,200 Xander. 134 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:25,880 Thank you. 135 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,000 It's beautiful. 136 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:32,080 I wanna break up. 137 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:37,280 OK, not quite the reaction I was lookin' for. 138 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:39,800 I know. I'm sorry. It's just... 139 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:44,640 Who are we kidding? Even if parts of us do see specialness... 140 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,680 ..we don't fit. 141 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:50,200 Yeah. 142 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,120 OK. 143 00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:56,960 Do you know a good day to break up with somebody? Any day besides Valentine's Day! 144 00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:00,160 I mean, what? Were you runnin' low on dramatic irony? 145 00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:03,160 I know. I didn't mean to do it this way. Uh... 146 00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:04,760 Well, you did. 147 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,480 Dude! Way to get dumped! 148 00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:31,240 - Buffy, my bud, you would not believe... - Can't talk right now. Angel. 149 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:33,640 - Do you need help? - It's all right. 150 00:12:43,520 --> 00:12:48,480 Gee, Xander, you should learn a second language, so even more girls can reject you. 151 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:05,640 What are you doing? 152 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:08,160 Amy. Good to see ya. 153 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:11,360 You're a witch. 154 00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:14,480 No, I'm not. That... that was my mom, remember? 155 00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:19,040 Yeah. I'm thinkin' it runs in the family. I saw you work that mojo on Miss Beakman. 156 00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:22,240 - Maybe I should tell somebody. - That's not... That is so mean! 157 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:25,440 - Blackmail is an ugly word. - I didn't say blackmail. 158 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:30,320 Yeah, but I'm about to blackmail you, so I thought I'd bring it up. 159 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:32,600 What do you want? 160 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,560 What do I want? 161 00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:40,080 I want some respect around here. I want, for once, to come out ahead. 162 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:42,720 I want the Hellmouth to be workin' for me. 163 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,800 You and me, Amy. 164 00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:50,960 We're gonna cast a little spell. 165 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:56,640 - A love spell? - Yeah. 166 00:13:56,640 --> 00:14:00,840 Just the basic. Can't eat, can't sleep, can't breathe anything but little old moi, 167 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:05,480 Well, that kind of thing is the hardest - to make someone love you for all eternity? 168 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:09,400 Whoa! Whoa! Back up. Who said anything about eternity? 169 00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:12,720 A man can only talk self-tanning lotion for so long. 170 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:16,800 I don't get it. If you don't wanna be with her for ever, what's the point? 171 00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:20,480 I want her to want me, desperately, so I can break up with her... 172 00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,640 ..and subject her to the same hell she's been puttin' me through. 173 00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:27,200 Oh, I don't know, Xander. 174 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:30,240 - Intent has to be pure with love spells. - Right. 175 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:32,960 I intend revenge. Pure as the driven snow. 176 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:37,880 Now, are you gonna play, or do we need to have another chat about invisible homework? 177 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:44,600 I'll need something of hers. A personal object. 178 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:46,880 Right. 179 00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:58,600 "Soon" what? You never held out on me until the big, bad thing became my ex-honey. 180 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:00,960 - Where's this from? - He said it with flowers. 181 00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:03,600 This isn't the time to be Mr Protective Guy. 182 00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:07,120 I can't prepare when I don't know what's coming. 183 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,880 No. Of course. You're right. 184 00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:12,200 S-sit down. 185 00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:24,000 Don't flatter yourself. I'm not gonna make a big scene. I just want the necklace back. 186 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:28,800 - What? I thought it was a gift. - Last night it was. Today it's scrap metal. 187 00:15:29,640 --> 00:15:33,280 - I figure I can melt it down, sell it for fillings. - You're pathetic. 188 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:37,760 Come on. I'm not gonna add to the Cordelia Chase Cast-Off Collection. 189 00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,800 It's in my locker. 190 00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,800 I can wait. 191 00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:09,160 Here. It's a good thing we broke up. Now I don't have to pretend I like it. 192 00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,000 Diana... 193 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:26,760 ..goddess of love and the hunt... 194 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:28,480 ..I pray to thee. 195 00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:32,280 Let my cries bind the heart of Xander's beloved. 196 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:36,960 May she neither rest nor sleep... 197 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:39,720 ..until she submits to his will only. 198 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:44,080 Diana, bring about this love and bless it! 199 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:48,320 Blow out the candle now! 200 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,440 Remember? I don't remember. 201 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:13,920 - What? - Morning, ladies. 202 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,720 Some kind of weather we've been havin', huh? 203 00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:21,600 What do you want? You can't be sniffing around for more jewellery to melt... 204 00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:25,600 ..cos all you ever gave me was that Smallmart-looking thing. 205 00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:30,400 Is this love? Cos maybe on you it doesn't look that different. 206 00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:34,040 What are you doing? Are you going, like, Stalker Boy on me now? 207 00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:40,040 - Sorry, my mistake. - Yeah, I should say so. 208 00:17:44,440 --> 00:17:45,680 What is his deal? 209 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:48,040 Oh, here's another. Here. 210 00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:52,480 Um, "Valentine's Day. Angel nails a puppy to the..." 211 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,760 - Skip it. - But... 212 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:58,760 I don't wanna know. I don't have a puppy. Skip it. 213 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:02,320 Right you are. I'll get another batch. 214 00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:05,280 I have a plan. 215 00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:08,560 - We use me as bait. - You mean make Angel come after you? 216 00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,960 No, I mean chop me up and stick me on hooks for fish to nibble at... 217 00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:14,920 ..cos it would be more fun than my life. 218 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:18,720 Yeah. I heard about you and Cordy. 219 00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:21,240 - That's her loss. - Yeah. 220 00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:23,400 Not really the popular theory. 221 00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:27,240 You know what I'd like? 222 00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:30,560 Why don't you and I do something tonight? Just the two of us. 223 00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:35,120 - Really? - Yeah. We can comfort each other. 224 00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:40,120 Would lap dancing enter into that scenario at all? Cos I find that very comforting. 225 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:46,400 Play your cards right... 226 00:18:47,440 --> 00:18:50,080 OK. Uh... you do know that I'm Xander, right? 227 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,600 I don't know, I just... 228 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,560 ..heard that you and Cordy broke up, and... 229 00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:59,480 ..I guess I was just surprised how glad I was. 230 00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:04,680 It's funny how you can see someone every day... 231 00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:08,680 ..but not really see them. You know? 232 00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:12,000 Yeah, it's funny. 233 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:14,400 And it's just gettin' funnier. 234 00:19:19,840 --> 00:19:22,200 Xander, can I talk to you for a minute? 235 00:19:27,640 --> 00:19:28,720 Yeah, OK. 236 00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:34,360 - Xander? - Yeah. 237 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,600 - I don't think the spell worked out. - It bombed. No biggie. 238 00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:40,720 Well, we can always try again. I am still pretty new at this. 239 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:46,520 Oh, no, no. It's OK. It was wrong to meddle with the forces of darkness. I see that now. 240 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:49,960 - I think we've all grown. I gotta go. - We don't have to cast any spells. 241 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,480 We can just... hang out. 242 00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:54,440 Sure. 243 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:58,320 - What? - Well, I liked spending time with you. 244 00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:00,760 You're so sweet. 245 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,720 It's funny how you can see a person every day and... 246 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:06,160 Not really see them? 247 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,200 Exactly. 248 00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,320 - So, anyway, I thought... - Hi, Xander. 249 00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:14,840 - What? - You're in my history class, right? 250 00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:18,280 - Yeah. - Maybe we could study together tonight. 251 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,120 Do you mind? We were talking. 252 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:23,400 I really gotta go. 253 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:25,440 Right now. 254 00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:43,200 Sorry. I wanted to surprise you. 255 00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:46,400 Good job! High marks. 256 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:50,440 Don't be so jumpy. I've been in your bed before. 257 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,600 Yeah, but, Will, we were both in footie pyjamas. 258 00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:56,120 Xand, I've been thinking. 259 00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:59,920 Will, I think I know what you've been thinking. But this is all my fault. 260 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,960 - I cast a spell and it backfired. - How long have we been friends? 261 00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:07,400 A long, long time, Too long to do anything that might change that now. 262 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:10,600 But friendships change all the time. 263 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:14,000 People grow apart. They grow closer. 264 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:18,760 This is good - how close we are now. I feel comfortable with this amount of closeness. 265 00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:22,040 In fact, I can even back up a few paces and still be happy. 266 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,040 See? 267 00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:29,160 I want you, Xander... 268 00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:32,880 - ..to be my first. - Baseman? Tell me we're talking baseball. 269 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:38,800 We both know it's right. 270 00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:40,640 It's not that I don't find you sexy. 271 00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,240 Is it Oz? Don't worry about him. 272 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:46,560 He's sweet, but... he's not you. 273 00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,680 Yes, he is! And you should go to him. Cos he's me! 274 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,400 I-I-I don't wanna use force. 275 00:21:57,640 --> 00:21:59,120 Force is OK. 276 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:01,440 That's it! This has gotta stop! 277 00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:04,640 It's time for me to act like a man. 278 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,600 And hide! 279 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:18,360 Ha, very funny. What did I do now? Wear red and purple together? 280 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:22,280 You know what you did. Xander is wounded because of you. 281 00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:26,320 Are you tripping? You wanted me to break up with him. 282 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:31,240 Only a sick pup would let Xander get away, no matter what her friends said. 283 00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:35,040 What does it take to make you people happy? 284 00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:42,600 # Yeah 285 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:46,640 # Got the love, got the love 286 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:47,840 # Mm, yeah 287 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:51,040 # Got the love, got the love 288 00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:54,840 # Got the love, got the love 289 00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:57,040 # Sugar baby 290 00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,880 # Got the love, got the love 291 00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:04,280 # Oh, now, babe, you been gone such a long time 292 00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:08,320 # Been thinkin' 'bout what it is we got 293 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:14,160 # Not all the time in the world 294 00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:15,440 # Whoo! 295 00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:17,560 # But we got a lot 296 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:22,840 # Now, there's much more than a ghost of a chance 297 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:26,520 # We can make it 298 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:31,120 # Right this time 299 00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:33,840 # Cos you got to stay mine 300 00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:36,720 # Yeah, I got the love 301 00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:40,040 # Got the love, got the love... 302 00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:44,840 Xander. 303 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:48,760 - What is it? - It's... it's me. 304 00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:51,560 - Throwing myself at your mercy. - What? Why? 305 00:23:52,240 --> 00:23:56,240 I made a mess, Giles. See, I found out that Amy's into witchcraft, and I was hurt I guess. 306 00:23:57,040 --> 00:24:00,040 So I made her put the love whammy on Cordy, but it backfired. 307 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:01,920 Now every woman in Sunnydale wants me. 308 00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:04,280 Which may sound swell on paper, but... 309 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,320 Rupert, we need to talk. Hey, Xander. 310 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:09,040 Nice shirt. 311 00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:13,480 Rupert, I know you're angry at me, and I don't blame you, but I am not just gonna go away. 312 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:17,520 I mean, I care far too much about you to... 313 00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:19,800 Have you been working out? 314 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:28,600 I cannot believe you are fool enough to do this. 315 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:31,680 Oh, no. I'm twice the fool it takes to do this. 316 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:36,560 Has, erm... Has Amy tried to reverse the spell? 317 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,720 All Amy wants to do is talk honeymoon plans. 318 00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:43,840 - Maybe I need to talk to Xander alone. - Do you have any idea how serious this is? 319 00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:47,240 People under a love spell, Xander, are deadly. 320 00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:50,000 They lose all capacity for reason. 321 00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:54,600 And if what you say is true, and the entire female population is affected... 322 00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:01,280 Don't leave the library. I'll find Amy and see if we can put a stop to this thing. 323 00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:10,640 No. 324 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,680 Alone at last. 325 00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:33,920 - Buff! Give me a heart attack. - Oh ... 326 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:36,800 ..I'm gonna give you more than that. 327 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:40,520 Buff, for the love of God, don't open that raincoat. 328 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:43,960 Come on, it's a party. 329 00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:46,720 Aren't you gonna open your present? 330 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:51,520 It's not that I don't want to. Sometimes the remote possibility you might like me... 331 00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,000 ..was all that sustained me. But not now. 332 00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:56,800 Not like this. 333 00:25:57,440 --> 00:26:00,240 This isn't real to you. You're only here because of a spell. 334 00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:04,960 I mean, if I thought you had one clue what it would mean to me... 335 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:07,960 But you don't. 336 00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:10,920 So I can't. 337 00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:14,480 So you're saying this is all a game? 338 00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:17,040 A game? I... No! 339 00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:21,520 You make me feel this way and then you reject me? What am I, a toy? 340 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:25,280 - Buffy, please calm down. - I'll calm down when you explain yourself! 341 00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:27,800 Get away from him. 342 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:30,400 He's mine. 343 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:34,120 Oh, I don't think so. 344 00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,920 - Xander, tell her. - What? I... uh... 345 00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:41,240 He doesn't have to say. I know what his heart wants. 346 00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:44,000 Funny. I know what your face wants. 347 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,440 What is this? You're two-timing me?! 348 00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:53,240 Goddess Hecate, work thy will. 349 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:55,960 Before thee let the unclean thing crawl! 350 00:26:58,320 --> 00:27:00,080 Buffy! 351 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:03,320 Oh, my God! 352 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,920 - Wh-what just happened? - Buffy. 353 00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:15,520 Where... where is she? 354 00:27:21,120 --> 00:27:23,880 - Oh, my God! - Why is she here? 355 00:27:24,120 --> 00:27:26,880 Can you focus for a minute? You just turned Buffy into a rat! 356 00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:30,120 Buffy can take care of herself. 357 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:33,720 - Why don't we go someplace private? - Can you... 358 00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:36,560 I'm not going anywhere until you change her back. 359 00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,800 You heard him. So why don't you undo your magic trick and get lost? 360 00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,360 Who made you queen of the world? 361 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:44,400 Well, you're old enough to be. 362 00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:48,880 Well, what can I say? I guess Xander's just too much man for the pimple squad. 363 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,680 Goddess Hecate, to you I pray... 364 00:27:54,120 --> 00:27:56,280 - ..with this... - Quit with the Hecate! 365 00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:02,160 OK, what now? You don't like my locker combination? 366 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:06,080 It's just not right. You never loved him. You just used him. 367 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,240 - You make me sick. - OK, Harmony... 368 00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,440 ..if you need to borrow my Midol, just ask. 369 00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:21,680 You two, sit! 370 00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:24,960 Be quiet. 371 00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:27,360 We have to catch the Buffy-rat. 372 00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:29,480 Ooh, there! 373 00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:38,480 Good, Buffy. 374 00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:41,440 Just... 375 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:51,400 - That kinda hurt. - Kinda? What was that for? 376 00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:55,200 I was on the phone all night listening to Willow cry about you. 377 00:28:55,920 --> 00:29:00,440 Now, I don't know exactly what happened, but I was left with the strong urge to hit you. 378 00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:08,160 - I didn't touch her, I swear. - Xander! 379 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:09,960 Where's Buffy? 380 00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:12,080 Amy turned her into a rat. 381 00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,960 I don't see her. If anything happens to her, I'll... 382 00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:26,520 Oh, just go home. Lock yourself away. You're only going to cause more problems here. 383 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:30,000 Um, Amy, Jenny and I will try and break the spell. 384 00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:35,400 Oz, if you could aid us in finding, erm... Buffy? 385 00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:38,120 Sure. Absolutely. 386 00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,920 - If... - Just go. Get out of my sight. 387 00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:56,800 Buffy? 388 00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:00,160 What are you doing? You guys are crazy! 389 00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:02,800 You thought you could do better? 390 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:07,200 - We'll knock that snotty attitude out of you! - No! Argh! 391 00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:31,680 You must have botched the ritual so that Cordelia's necklace actually protected her. 392 00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:35,800 It should be reversible. Where did you learn animal transformation? 393 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:38,760 Why did you send Xander away? He needs me. 394 00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:43,680 - That's a laugh. - He loves me. We see into each other's souls. 395 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,240 No one can love two people at once. 396 00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:49,240 - What we have is real. - Instead of making me ill, help me. 397 00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:53,200 - You have no idea what I'm going through. - I know it's not love! 398 00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:56,080 It's obsession - selfish, banal obsession. 399 00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,280 Xander has put himself in danger. 400 00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:02,960 If you cared about him, you'd help save him rather than wittering on about your feelings. 401 00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:06,240 Now, let's get on with some work. Now, Jenny... 402 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:08,760 Great. 403 00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:11,880 I think we... 404 00:31:12,080 --> 00:31:15,280 - ..lost 'em. - I should have known I'd find you with her. 405 00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:19,920 - Will. Come on, you don't wanna hurt me. - Oh, no? 406 00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:24,160 You don't know how hard this is for me. I love you so much. 407 00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:27,440 I'd rather see you dead than with that bitch! 408 00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:14,560 - OK, now I really think we've lost 'em. - Dammit, what's going on? 409 00:32:15,080 --> 00:32:19,160 - Who died and made you Elvis? - Buffy's house. Get inside. I'll explain later. 410 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:25,440 - Come on! - Xander? Cordelia? 411 00:32:26,480 --> 00:32:28,160 Yeah. Hi. 412 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:31,600 What happened? Why are you all scratched up? 413 00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,480 - Where's Buffy? - She's, um... 414 00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:36,080 ..around. 415 00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:38,000 Well, sit down and tell me about it. 416 00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:42,280 Why don't you run upstairs and grab some bandages out of the bathroom? 417 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,960 Let me, uh, get you something to drink. 418 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:48,680 You in the mood for cold or hot? 419 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:49,760 I-I... 420 00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:52,880 I think it's more of a hot night, don't you? 421 00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:59,200 - Whatever. - You are so tense. Mmm. 422 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:04,760 - What are you doing? Make me yak! - Cordelia, go upstairs. This is between us. 423 00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:08,360 - Gross. I think not. Let's go. - What are you doing? 424 00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:11,320 Hey, get your hands off me! 425 00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:15,440 And keep your mom-aged mitts off my boyfriend. 426 00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:16,920 Former! 427 00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:19,280 Why has everyone gone insane? 428 00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:23,920 Insane? Is it so impossible for you to believe that other women find me attractive? 429 00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,280 The only way to get girls to want you would be witchcraft. 430 00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:29,720 That is such a... 431 00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:31,840 Well, yeah, OK. Good point. 432 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:35,440 Oh, my God! 433 00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,120 Xander, honey, let Joycie in. Hon, let Joycie in. 434 00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,560 - Upstairs! Buffy's room! - Sweetheart? 435 00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:51,040 Good. The mob still hasn't found us. We should be safer up here. 436 00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:53,920 Works in theory. 437 00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:55,760 Xander! 438 00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:14,800 - Where's Buffy? - Cordy, get outta here! 439 00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:21,840 Perfect. 440 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:27,520 I wanted to do something special for Buffy. Actually, to Buffy. But this is so much better. 441 00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,920 If it's any consolation, I feel very close to you right now. 442 00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:42,800 - Buffy, how...? - Don't fret, kitten. 443 00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:47,560 Mummy's here. 444 00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:50,040 I don't know what you're up to, but it doesn't amuse! 445 00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:57,480 If you harm one hair on this boy's head... 446 00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:01,040 You've gotta be kidding. Him? 447 00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:04,880 Just because I've finally found a real man. 448 00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:11,880 - I guess I really did drive you crazy. - Your face is a poem. 449 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,440 I can read it. 450 00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:19,360 Really? It doesn't say "Spare me" by any chance? 451 00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:28,680 How do you feel about eternal life? 452 00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:33,440 We couldn't just start with a coffee? 453 00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:35,360 A movie maybe? 454 00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:41,080 - There he is! He's mine! - Get off! 455 00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:51,240 All you had to do was love me! 456 00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:53,120 No! 457 00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:56,680 Get out of the way! Get off him! 458 00:35:57,960 --> 00:35:59,720 Back off! 459 00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:11,520 Ah, sorry, Dru. 460 00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:14,840 Guess you're not invited. 461 00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:20,000 It's never gonna work for us, Xander. We have to end it. 462 00:36:28,720 --> 00:36:30,480 Here, Buffy. 463 00:36:43,720 --> 00:36:45,560 Right. 464 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,040 Go on. You first. 465 00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:50,800 - Xander! - Gimme a nail. 466 00:36:52,720 --> 00:36:55,160 If we die in here, I'm gonna kick your ass. I mean it. 467 00:36:55,720 --> 00:36:59,000 This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't dumped me - but no, you're so popular! 468 00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:03,000 Me? I'm not the one who embraced the black arts just to get the girls to like me. 469 00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:05,400 Well, congratulations. It worked. 470 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:10,240 It would've worked fine, except your hide's so thick not even magic can penetrate it! 471 00:37:13,720 --> 00:37:15,480 You mean the spell was for me? 472 00:37:25,720 --> 00:37:27,680 Xander, let me touch you! 473 00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:34,360 Goddess of creatures great and small, I conjure thee to withdraw. 474 00:37:40,720 --> 00:37:42,120 Hecate... 475 00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:44,520 ..I hereby license thee to depart. 476 00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:53,160 Buffy? 477 00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:02,800 - Oh, my God! - Stay behind me. 478 00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:05,840 Xander! 479 00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:08,920 I need you. Come here, please! 480 00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:12,040 Erm, Diana... 481 00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:14,320 ..goddess of love, begone. 482 00:38:14,320 --> 00:38:16,200 Hear no more thy siren's song. 483 00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:23,440 Get off! 484 00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:44,200 Get off me! 485 00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:50,920 What's going on? Where am I? 486 00:38:52,720 --> 00:38:54,320 What's going on? 487 00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:06,600 - Hi, Oz! - Hi. 488 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:10,480 I seem to be having a slight case of nudity here. 489 00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:13,000 But you're not a rat... 490 00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:14,920 ..so call it an upside. 491 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:19,520 - You think you could get me some clothing? - Yes, I can. Just, uh, don't go anywhere. 492 00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,280 Really not an issue. 493 00:39:26,320 --> 00:39:28,560 What... What did we...? 494 00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:31,920 Boy, that was the best scavenger hunt ever! 495 00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,400 - "Scavenger hunt". - Your mom seemed to buy it. 496 00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:43,280 So she says. She's so wigged at hitting on one of my friends that she's repressing. 497 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,280 She's getting good at that. I should probably start worrying. 498 00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:49,960 Well, I'm back to being incredibly unpopular. 499 00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:54,320 - Better than everyone trying to murder you. - Mostly, but, uh... 500 00:39:55,720 --> 00:39:57,600 ..Willow won't even talk to me. 501 00:39:58,120 --> 00:40:01,400 - Any particular reason she should? - How much grovelling are we talking? 502 00:40:01,720 --> 00:40:03,480 Oh, a month, at least. 503 00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:07,240 Xander, come on. I mean, this is worse for her than anyone. 504 00:40:07,720 --> 00:40:11,160 She loved you before you invoked the great roofie spirit. The rest of us... 505 00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:13,440 - You remember, huh? - Oh, yeah. 506 00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:19,280 I remember coming on to you. I remember begging you to undress me. 507 00:40:19,720 --> 00:40:21,800 And then a sudden need for cheese. 508 00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:23,760 I also remember that you didn't. 509 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:26,920 - Need cheese? - Undress me. 510 00:40:28,720 --> 00:40:32,640 - It meant a lot to me, what you said. - I couldn't take advantage of you like that. 511 00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:37,080 - OK, for a minute it was touch and go there. - You came through. 512 00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:40,680 - There might just be hope for you yet. - Tell that to Cordelia. 513 00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:43,680 You're on your own there. 514 00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:49,000 - Cody Weinberg called me last night. - Cody Weinberg? 515 00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,320 - The one with the 35SL? - The very one. 516 00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:54,400 He's thinking of asking me to the pledge dance. 517 00:40:54,720 --> 00:40:56,160 - That's so huge! - Yeah! 518 00:40:56,520 --> 00:41:01,320 There's just two other girls he's gonna ask first, and if they refuse, then... Watch it! 519 00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:03,720 Sorry. 520 00:41:03,720 --> 00:41:08,120 God! I'm glad your mom stopped working at the drive-through long enough to dress you. 521 00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:12,400 Oh, that reminds me. Did you see Jennifer's backpack? 522 00:41:12,720 --> 00:41:14,640 - It is so trying to... - Harmony, shut up! 523 00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:19,840 - Do you know what you are? You're a sheep. - I'm not a sheep. 524 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:24,720 You're a sheep. All you do is what everyone else does, just so you can say you did it first! 525 00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:30,240 Here I am scrambling for your approval when I'm way cooler than you cos I'm not a sheep. 526 00:41:30,720 --> 00:41:32,960 I do what I wanna do and I wear what I wanna wear. 527 00:41:33,720 --> 00:41:36,720 And you know what? I'll date whoever the hell I wanna date. 528 00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:39,400 No matter how lame he is. 529 00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:52,080 Oh, God! Oh, God! 530 00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:55,840 - It's gonna be OK. Just keep walkin'. - Oh, God, what have I done? 531 00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:59,200 - They're never gonna speak to me again. - Sure they are. 532 00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:02,000 If it helps, when we're around them, we can fight a lot. 533 00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:05,640 - You promise? - You can pretty much count on it.