1
00:00:04,025 --> 00:00:06,460
- I think we should get a limo.
- A limo?

2
00:00:06,545 --> 00:00:08,377
- Yeah.
- A big, expensive limo?

3
00:00:08,465 --> 00:00:11,139
That sounds fun!
It is our last Homecoming dance,

4
00:00:11,225 --> 00:00:14,456
- so maybe it should be a big deal.
- You wanna talk fun?

5
00:00:14,545 --> 00:00:18,095
Public bus. You meet the funnest people.
Back me up here, Oz.

6
00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:20,745
If it's a dollar issue, we could all take my van.

7
00:00:20,825 --> 00:00:25,661
Van? The Homecoming Queen doesn't
go to the dance in a van. Use your head.

8
00:00:25,745 --> 00:00:30,023
You haven't been elected yet. Although
you certainly and without a doubt will be.

9
00:00:30,105 --> 00:00:32,779
- Who else likes a limo?
- A private limo.

10
00:00:32,865 --> 00:00:35,379
It is pretty cuddlesome.

11
00:00:35,465 --> 00:00:37,661
And if we all split the cost...

12
00:00:39,545 --> 00:00:42,458
- Maybe. You know, if I go and all.
- Why wouldn't you go?

13
00:00:42,545 --> 00:00:46,459
You already have your tickets.
I mean, unless you don't have a da..y

14
00:00:46,545 --> 00:00:50,903
or two to think about it.
We should all think about it.

15
00:00:50,985 --> 00:00:55,218
What's going on here? Did Scott not ask her
to the Homecoming dance yet?

16
00:00:55,305 --> 00:01:00,459
Thanks, Cordelia.
Humiliation's really good for my colour.

17
00:01:00,545 --> 00:01:02,536
Well, no. I just...

18
00:01:02,625 --> 00:01:07,938
I assumed that you would think it was corny,
but I'm in. I mean, if you are. If you want to.

19
00:01:08,025 --> 00:01:11,143
Sure I do. You know, if you want to.

20
00:01:11,225 --> 00:01:15,344
- Well, I do if you want to.
- The judges will accept that as a yes.

21
00:01:15,425 --> 00:01:21,262
- Do you want me to get you another drink?
- No, actually.

22
00:01:21,345 --> 00:01:24,861
I'm a little tired.
I think I'm gonna call it a night.

23
00:01:24,945 --> 00:01:28,222
- But I'm excited about the dance.
- Me too.

24
00:01:55,385 --> 00:01:57,376
It's just me.

25
00:01:57,945 --> 00:01:59,936
Here.

26
00:02:11,545 --> 00:02:13,536
How are you feeling?

27
00:02:14,785 --> 00:02:16,776
It hurts...

28
00:02:18,025 --> 00:02:20,016
less.

29
00:02:20,545 --> 00:02:22,536
Good.

30
00:02:32,465 --> 00:02:38,177
I haven't told Giles
and the others that you're back.

31
00:02:41,545 --> 00:02:43,536
And I'm not going to.

32
00:02:45,225 --> 00:02:49,219
They wouldn't understand
that you're... better.

33
00:02:50,145 --> 00:02:53,137
And I'm gonna keep helping you get better.

34
00:02:54,625 --> 00:02:57,504
It's just that everything's different now.

35
00:02:57,945 --> 00:03:02,542
I'm a senior.
I'm really working harder in school.

36
00:03:02,945 --> 00:03:05,334
I'm even thinking about college.

37
00:03:07,545 --> 00:03:09,661
And I'm involved with someone.

38
00:03:25,305 --> 00:03:27,296
His name is Scott.

39
00:03:28,545 --> 00:03:30,536
He's a nice, solid guy.

40
00:03:33,225 --> 00:03:35,455
He makes me happy.

41
00:03:36,145 --> 00:03:40,457
And that's what I need.
Someone I can count on.

42
00:03:43,025 --> 00:03:46,017
I don't think we should
see each other any more.

43
00:03:46,745 --> 00:03:48,736
You don't?

44
00:03:50,625 --> 00:03:53,185
When did this happen? Where was I?

45
00:03:53,625 --> 00:03:55,616
Buffy, it's just...

46
00:03:55,705 --> 00:04:00,905
Before we were going out, you seemed
so full of life, like a force of nature.

47
00:04:01,425 --> 00:04:06,704
- Now you seem distracted all the time and...
- No, I know. I'm getting better. Honest.

48
00:04:06,785 --> 00:04:12,224
In fact, from here on, you are gonna see
a drastic distraction reduction.

49
00:04:13,305 --> 00:04:15,865
"Drastic distraction reduction"?

50
00:04:15,945 --> 00:04:18,061
Try saying that ten times fast.

51
00:04:18,785 --> 00:04:21,174
I'm really sorry.

52
00:05:25,465 --> 00:05:27,456
Is that her?

53
00:05:29,145 --> 00:05:31,580
In the nubile flesh, my friend.

54
00:05:33,865 --> 00:05:36,220
That's the target.

55
00:06:31,945 --> 00:06:34,141
The Mayor will see you now.

56
00:06:39,745 --> 00:06:43,340
- I'm sorry to bother you, sir.
- I'm not bothered, Allan.

57
00:06:43,785 --> 00:06:46,857
Well, I'm not sure how serious this is, but

58
00:06:46,945 --> 00:06:50,825
they were spotted in town three days ago,
I've just been informed.

59
00:06:50,905 --> 00:06:53,465
Frederick and Hans Gruenshtahler:

60
00:06:53,545 --> 00:06:59,461
wanted in Germany for capital murder,
terrorism, the bombing of flight 1402.

61
00:06:59,545 --> 00:07:04,574
I should have brought it to your attention
sooner, but I wanted to confirm...

62
00:07:06,305 --> 00:07:08,535
Would you show me your hands, please?

63
00:07:08,625 --> 00:07:12,016
- Sir?
- Your hands.

64
00:07:20,025 --> 00:07:23,381
- I think they could be cleaner.
- Of course, sir.

65
00:07:23,465 --> 00:07:25,854
I mean, I washed them, but...

66
00:07:26,945 --> 00:07:32,975
After every meal, and under your fingernails.
Dirt gets trapped there. And mayonnaise.

67
00:07:33,505 --> 00:07:37,624
My dear mother said "cleanliness
is next to godliness" and I believed her.

68
00:07:37,705 --> 00:07:40,265
She never caught a cold.

69
00:07:40,665 --> 00:07:43,305
I'd like these two to be
put under surveillance.

70
00:07:43,385 --> 00:07:47,777
I'd like to know if... any other
colourful characters have come to town.

71
00:07:47,865 --> 00:07:51,574
- I'll take care of it.
- You have all my faith.

72
00:08:12,585 --> 00:08:17,614
You have to help me pick an outfit. I wanna
wear something that makes Oz go "Oh."

73
00:08:17,705 --> 00:08:22,097
No problem. I got the tux goin' on.
I'm gonna look hot if it even remotely fits.

74
00:08:23,025 --> 00:08:24,538
Whatcha doin'?

75
00:08:24,625 --> 00:08:28,220
Checking out the - I laughingly
use the phrase - "competition".

76
00:08:28,305 --> 00:08:31,616
Holly Charleston: nice girl,
brain-dead, doesn't have a prayer.

77
00:08:31,705 --> 00:08:33,218
Michelle Blake:

78
00:08:33,305 --> 00:08:37,219
open to all mankind, especially those
with a letterman's jacket and a car.

79
00:08:37,785 --> 00:08:41,619
- She could give me a run.
- Where's Buffy? She'll miss the pictures.

80
00:08:41,905 --> 00:08:44,704
With Faith in the library, gettin' all sweaty.

81
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:47,777
- They're training.
- I stand by my phrase.

82
00:08:47,865 --> 00:08:51,381
She wasn't here the day they announced 'em.
Anybody tell her?

83
00:08:51,465 --> 00:08:54,378
I'll do it. I'm going to
the nurse's office for an ice pack.

84
00:08:54,465 --> 00:08:58,618
- Did you hurt yourself?
- No, silly. It shrinks the pores!

85
00:09:04,025 --> 00:09:06,938
Man! Guys should break up
with you more often.

86
00:09:07,025 --> 00:09:08,140
Gee, thank you.

87
00:09:08,225 --> 00:09:12,662
I mean it. You got some quality rage goin'.
Really gives you an edge.

88
00:09:13,545 --> 00:09:16,458
Edge Girl.
Just what I always wanted to be.

89
00:09:16,545 --> 00:09:21,255
Well, screw him, all right? You move on,
and you party heavily, and you'll be fine.

90
00:09:21,345 --> 00:09:24,144
- You're still going to that dance, right?
- Maybe.

91
00:09:24,225 --> 00:09:26,899
You got the tix already.
Why don't we go together?

92
00:09:26,985 --> 00:09:30,296
- I don't know about that.
- Come on. We'll find a coupla studs,

93
00:09:30,385 --> 00:09:33,298
we'll use 'em and discard 'em.
That's always fun.

94
00:09:33,785 --> 00:09:36,982
OK, I'm in. Not the stud-using part, though.

95
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:39,458
Or probably not.

96
00:09:43,665 --> 00:09:45,542
Bobby. Mashad.

97
00:09:45,625 --> 00:09:48,139
You don't phone, you don't write...

98
00:09:48,225 --> 00:09:50,421
Where's the love?

99
00:09:57,785 --> 00:09:59,776
Ms Moran? Hi.

100
00:09:59,865 --> 00:10:02,141
I'm so glad that I ran into you.

101
00:10:02,225 --> 00:10:06,139
I had this little incident last year
of getting kicked out of school.

102
00:10:06,225 --> 00:10:09,456
And I'm back now, though.
I've done all of my make-up tests,

103
00:10:09,545 --> 00:10:12,617
but I need one written
recommendation from a teacher.

104
00:10:12,705 --> 00:10:16,141
I think the word
that Principal Snyder used was "glowing".

105
00:10:16,225 --> 00:10:19,024
To put in my file,
so I can prove that I belong here.

106
00:10:19,105 --> 00:10:21,096
And, you are...

107
00:10:21,785 --> 00:10:25,062
Buffy. Buffy Summers.

108
00:10:25,145 --> 00:10:27,136
Third row. I sat by the window.

109
00:10:27,225 --> 00:10:31,378
Your class: Contemporary American Heroes
from Amelia Earhart to Maya Angelou.

110
00:10:31,465 --> 00:10:33,854
The class that changed my life?

111
00:10:33,945 --> 00:10:38,382
- Were you absent a lot...
- Buffy?

112
00:10:41,865 --> 00:10:45,460
Hi. I hope you'll consider me
for Homecoming Queen.

113
00:10:47,945 --> 00:10:52,701
I can't believe it. My favourite teacher,
and she didn't even remember who I was.

114
00:10:52,785 --> 00:10:56,779
I'm like a non-person. Am I invisible?
Can you see me?

115
00:10:57,465 --> 00:10:59,456
Big as life.

116
00:10:59,705 --> 00:11:05,144
At Hemery I was Prom Princess, I was Fiesta
Queen, I was on the cheerleading squad.

117
00:11:05,225 --> 00:11:08,024
And the yearbook was, like, a story of me.

118
00:11:08,105 --> 00:11:13,134
Now it's senior year, and I'll be one crappy
picture on one eighth of one crappy page.

119
00:11:13,225 --> 00:11:17,059
- No, actually, you're not.
- What do you mean?

120
00:11:17,145 --> 00:11:19,944
Well, you missed the picture-taking.

121
00:11:20,025 --> 00:11:22,062
When? Why?

122
00:11:22,145 --> 00:11:25,536
- We did 'em yesterday.
- Didn't Cordelia tell you?

123
00:11:26,745 --> 00:11:28,736
Thanks for your support.

124
00:11:29,385 --> 00:11:32,616
- Buffy, you look so cute in that outfit.
- I'm not voting for you.

125
00:11:32,705 --> 00:11:34,139
Then make it snappy.

126
00:11:34,225 --> 00:11:37,058
Why didn't you tell me
about the yearbook pictures?

127
00:11:37,145 --> 00:11:40,775
- Oh, I guess I forgot. What's the big?
- It's just...

128
00:11:40,865 --> 00:11:43,937
You could've thought
about somebody else for 30 seconds.

129
00:11:44,025 --> 00:11:48,781
- Hey, I am under a lot of pressure here.
- Oh, yeah, campaigning. Rough gig.

130
00:11:48,865 --> 00:11:52,540
Just because you were Guacamole Queen
when you were three

131
00:11:52,625 --> 00:11:55,060
doesn't mean you understand
how this works.

132
00:11:55,145 --> 00:11:58,058
Obviously, it involves
handing out lame flyers.

133
00:11:58,145 --> 00:12:03,538
No. It involves being part of this school
and having actual friends.

134
00:12:03,625 --> 00:12:08,142
Now, if it was about monsters, blood
and innards, then you'd be a shoo-in.

135
00:12:08,225 --> 00:12:12,617
- I'd like to see you try to win the crown.
- You would?

136
00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:18,905
- Then you will.
- What does that mean?

137
00:12:20,305 --> 00:12:22,296
I'm gonna show you how it's done.

138
00:12:22,385 --> 00:12:25,138
I'm gonna run for Homecoming Queen,
and I'll win.

139
00:12:25,225 --> 00:12:27,136
This is starting to be sad.

140
00:12:27,225 --> 00:12:30,297
Sorry, Cordy, but you have no idea
who you're messing with.

141
00:12:30,385 --> 00:12:32,615
What? The Slayer?

142
00:12:32,705 --> 00:12:36,221
I'm not talking about the Slayer.
I'm talking about Buffy.

143
00:12:36,305 --> 00:12:39,218
You've awakened the Prom Queen within.

144
00:12:39,305 --> 00:12:41,694
And that crown is going to be mine.

145
00:12:42,945 --> 00:12:44,697
Competition.

146
00:12:45,505 --> 00:12:48,145
Competition is a beautiful thing.

147
00:12:48,945 --> 00:12:53,018
It makes us strive. It makes us accomplish.

148
00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:57,622
Occasionally, it makes us kill.
We all have the desire to win.

149
00:12:58,465 --> 00:13:01,025
I mean, whether we're human,

150
00:13:01,105 --> 00:13:03,096
vampire...

151
00:13:04,945 --> 00:13:08,540
Or whatever you are, my brother.
You got spiny-looking head things.

152
00:13:08,625 --> 00:13:10,616
I ain't never seen that before.

153
00:13:10,705 --> 00:13:15,461
- I am Kulak, of the Miquot Clan.
- Isn't that nice.

154
00:13:15,545 --> 00:13:19,504
Point is, you're all here for the same reason.

155
00:13:19,585 --> 00:13:21,940
It sure ain't no philosophy class, is it?

156
00:13:22,025 --> 00:13:26,895
Mr Gorch, my account statement says
that your deposit has not yet been made.

157
00:13:27,545 --> 00:13:32,938
Well, me and Candy... we blowin' our whole
honeymoon stash on this little game here.

158
00:13:34,505 --> 00:13:37,258
- They're dirty.
- They're non-consecutive.

159
00:13:40,865 --> 00:13:45,860
The games will begin in a few days' time.
The first target, Buffy, you've all seen.

160
00:13:45,945 --> 00:13:49,939
The second, Faith, is a little more elusive.

161
00:13:50,025 --> 00:13:52,938
But they will be together
and ready for the killing,

162
00:13:53,025 --> 00:13:56,859
and that is a money-back guarantee.

163
00:13:57,145 --> 00:13:59,580
Ladies, gentlemen,

164
00:14:00,385 --> 00:14:02,456
spiny-headed-lookin' creatures,

165
00:14:02,545 --> 00:14:07,142
welcome to SlayerFest '98.

166
00:14:14,945 --> 00:14:17,539
What do you think of this?

167
00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:22,458
- Nice.
- It's my first big dance, you know?

168
00:14:22,545 --> 00:14:24,934
Where there's a boy and a band

169
00:14:25,025 --> 00:14:29,178
and not just me alone in my room
pretending that there's a boy and a band.

170
00:14:29,545 --> 00:14:31,741
- I just want it to be...
- Yeah, special.

171
00:14:31,825 --> 00:14:34,738
That's why I spared no expense on the tux.

172
00:14:34,825 --> 00:14:38,056
The tux? I thought you borrowed it
from your cousin Rigby.

173
00:14:38,145 --> 00:14:40,056
Expense to my pride, Will.

174
00:14:40,145 --> 00:14:44,742
They're our only relations with money,
and they shun us. As they should.

175
00:14:47,225 --> 00:14:49,455
What do you think about this?

176
00:14:51,145 --> 00:14:52,704
Nice.

177
00:14:59,145 --> 00:15:01,534
- What?
- I was just...

178
00:15:02,745 --> 00:15:06,625
Remember the eighth-grade cotillion?
You had that clip-on?

179
00:15:06,705 --> 00:15:11,063
- Yeah, I was pretty stylin' with a clip-on.
- Now here we are, and it's...

180
00:15:11,145 --> 00:15:14,297
- Homecoming.
- Yeah, we should face it, Will.

181
00:15:14,385 --> 00:15:20,063
You and I will be in neighbouring rest homes
while I come over so you can adjust my...

182
00:15:21,105 --> 00:15:24,496
Well, I can't think of anything
that's not really gross, so...

183
00:15:26,785 --> 00:15:29,504
So. You and Oz.

184
00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:32,615
How do I put this?

185
00:15:32,705 --> 00:15:37,063
Are we on first, second, or ye gods?

186
00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:40,024
That's none of your business,
Alexander Harris.

187
00:15:40,105 --> 00:15:44,224
- Rounding second.
- You don't know that.

188
00:15:44,305 --> 00:15:49,300
- What about you and Cordelia?
- A gentleman never talks about conquests.

189
00:15:49,705 --> 00:15:52,504
Oh, yeah?
Well, since when did you become a...

190
00:15:55,305 --> 00:15:57,296
gentleman?

191
00:15:58,545 --> 00:16:00,695
I know. "Nice."

192
00:16:02,225 --> 00:16:04,614
I was gonna go with "gorgeous".

193
00:16:05,785 --> 00:16:08,379
Really? You too.

194
00:16:09,025 --> 00:16:10,857
In a guy way.

195
00:16:12,545 --> 00:16:14,616
Oz is very lucky.

196
00:16:16,145 --> 00:16:19,581
So is Cordelia. In a girl way.

197
00:16:21,785 --> 00:16:25,380
I don't know if I can dance in this.
I don't know if I can dance!

198
00:16:26,225 --> 00:16:28,421
Come on. Piece of cake. Here.

199
00:16:30,705 --> 00:16:32,696
Well, that seems to...

200
00:16:36,545 --> 00:16:40,698
Yeah. This shouldn't be a problem.

201
00:16:40,785 --> 00:16:42,776
No.

202
00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:45,776
No problem.

203
00:17:01,105 --> 00:17:04,496
- That didn't just happen.
- No! I mean, it did, but it didn't.

204
00:17:04,785 --> 00:17:07,538
Because I respect you.
And Oz. And I would never...

205
00:17:07,625 --> 00:17:11,255
I would never either.
It must be the clothes. It's a fluke.

206
00:17:11,345 --> 00:17:14,019
It's a clothes fluke.
There'll be no more fluking.

207
00:17:14,105 --> 00:17:15,698
Not ever.

208
00:17:16,545 --> 00:17:19,139
- We gotta get out of these clothes.
- Right now.

209
00:17:19,225 --> 00:17:21,535
- I didn't mean...
- I didn't... me either.

210
00:17:21,745 --> 00:17:25,295
<i>A campaign is like a war.
It's won or lost in the trenches.</i>

211
00:17:25,385 --> 00:17:30,459
Holly, Michelle, and our real competition,
Cordelia, all have big head starts.

212
00:17:30,545 --> 00:17:34,504
Speaking of big heads, if I had a watermelon
as big as Cordelia's, I'd be rich.

213
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,581
Waits for laugh...

214
00:17:39,985 --> 00:17:43,535
OK, you're right. Making fun of the
competition only makes me seem petty.

215
00:17:43,625 --> 00:17:47,459
Now, this is just like any other
popularity contest. I've done this before.

216
00:17:47,545 --> 00:17:51,140
The only difference being
this time I'm not actually popular.

217
00:17:51,225 --> 00:17:55,583
Although, I'm not exactly unpopular. A lot
of people came to my Welcome Home party.

218
00:17:55,665 --> 00:17:58,134
- But they were killed by zombies.
- Good point.

219
00:17:58,225 --> 00:18:02,901
OK, here's the plan. Willow, I need you
to make a database. See who's for us,

220
00:18:02,985 --> 00:18:06,023
who's on the fence
and where our real crisis areas are.

221
00:18:06,105 --> 00:18:10,383
Oz, you take the fringe: musicians,
those not normally inclined to vote.

222
00:18:10,785 --> 00:18:12,537
Xander, what...

223
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:14,859
Cordelia.

224
00:18:14,945 --> 00:18:19,576
OK, look. I know this is awkward, but I don't
see any reason why we can't get along

225
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:23,624
during this campaign time.
I mean, we're almost friends

226
00:18:23,705 --> 00:18:26,584
and we are all riding together in the limo.

227
00:18:26,945 --> 00:18:30,063
Yeah, great.
Willow, how's that database coming?

228
00:18:31,145 --> 00:18:33,534
It's... just about done.

229
00:18:33,985 --> 00:18:35,783
Xander?

230
00:18:35,865 --> 00:18:38,778
- I got your new flyers.
- Let's get cracking.

231
00:18:42,545 --> 00:18:45,344
She's my girlfriend.

232
00:18:46,225 --> 00:18:49,616
It's just that she needs it
so much more than you do.

233
00:18:51,305 --> 00:18:53,899
As Willow goes, so goes my nation.

234
00:18:55,385 --> 00:19:00,221
Thanks for what you said, Buffy.
I think we're gettin' along great. Don't you?

235
00:19:12,225 --> 00:19:15,855
Seems like a lot of fuss for one little title.

236
00:19:15,945 --> 00:19:19,540
Well... you know, it's no fun
if you don't try your best.

237
00:19:20,225 --> 00:19:23,217
As long as fun is still in the mix.

238
00:19:23,305 --> 00:19:26,775
Sure! It's not like anyone
takes it that seriously.

239
00:20:20,625 --> 00:20:23,094
- Sorry.
- Here.

240
00:20:25,305 --> 00:20:27,535
I heard you were doing this.

241
00:20:27,625 --> 00:20:30,538
Yeah. It's just something to pass the time.

242
00:20:30,625 --> 00:20:33,344
- It's silly, really.
- I don't think so.

243
00:20:33,945 --> 00:20:36,300
For what it's worth, you have my vote.

244
00:20:36,385 --> 00:20:39,025
No, I don't want you to feel...

245
00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:40,425
Thank you.

246
00:21:24,025 --> 00:21:26,938
- Hey.
- Hi. How are you? You look good.

247
00:21:27,025 --> 00:21:29,619
Anything new?
Hey, did I mention you look good?

248
00:21:29,705 --> 00:21:35,064
Willow, it's OK that you're helping Cordelia.
We're best friends. I won't hold it against you.

249
00:21:35,145 --> 00:21:39,139
No, I'm not a friend.
I'm a rabid dog who should be shot!

250
00:21:39,225 --> 00:21:42,934
But there are forces at work.
Dark, incomprehensible forces.

251
00:21:43,025 --> 00:21:46,302
I'm sure they're more important
than all we've been through,

252
00:21:46,385 --> 00:21:51,983
- or the number of times I've saved your life.
- What do you want?

253
00:21:52,065 --> 00:21:54,944
15 minutes alone on your computer
with Cordelia's database.

254
00:21:55,025 --> 00:21:57,585
- OK.
- Good!

255
00:21:57,665 --> 00:22:00,544
So, I spoke to the limo people,
and we're all set.

256
00:22:00,625 --> 00:22:03,856
<i>They'll pick up Faith, then me,
then swing by and get you guys.</i>

257
00:22:03,945 --> 00:22:08,382
<i>Now, what's your database
tell you about my weaknesses?</i>

258
00:22:11,465 --> 00:22:16,778
You know, Jonathan, I've always felt
a special bond between you and me.

259
00:22:16,865 --> 00:22:21,814
Cordelia gave me six bucks.
That buys a whole lotta cupcakes.

260
00:22:21,905 --> 00:22:26,775
Are you kidding? I've been doing
the Vulcan death grip since I was four.

261
00:22:26,865 --> 00:22:28,856
You really are giving out money, huh?

262
00:22:28,945 --> 00:22:34,224
Is that any more tacky than your faux
"I'm shy but deep" campaign posters?

263
00:22:34,305 --> 00:22:35,534
Yes.

264
00:22:35,625 --> 00:22:39,141
This whole trying to be like me
really isn't funny any more.

265
00:22:39,225 --> 00:22:42,502
I was never trying to be like you,
and when was it funny?

266
00:22:42,585 --> 00:22:47,864
Why should your pathetic need to recapture
your glory days splinter my vote?

267
00:22:47,945 --> 00:22:51,904
How can you think it's OK to talk to people
like this? Do you have parents?

268
00:22:51,985 --> 00:22:54,215
Yeah. Two of them... unlike some people.

269
00:22:55,705 --> 00:22:58,174
Your brain isn't connected
to your mouth, is it?

270
00:22:58,265 --> 00:23:01,462
Why don't you do us both a favour
and stay out of my way?

271
00:23:01,545 --> 00:23:04,503
Don't ever do that again.

272
00:23:04,585 --> 00:23:08,215
- You're sick, you know that?
- Let's not say something we'll regret, OK.

273
00:23:08,305 --> 00:23:10,296
- You crazy freak!
- Vapid whore!

274
00:23:10,385 --> 00:23:12,774
- Like that.
- What did you call me?

275
00:23:13,625 --> 00:23:18,699
This is just the worst thing
that's ever happened. Ever!

276
00:23:18,785 --> 00:23:21,379
I know. It's just...

277
00:23:22,145 --> 00:23:25,854
When I look at you now, it's like
I'm seeing you for the first time.

278
00:23:25,945 --> 00:23:29,540
- I'm talking about Buffy and Cordelia.
- Me too.

279
00:23:30,545 --> 00:23:35,016
What are we gonna do? I mean, we have
to do something. This is all our fault.

280
00:23:35,105 --> 00:23:37,938
How do you get from
"chick fight" to "our fault"?

281
00:23:38,025 --> 00:23:42,701
Because we felt so guilty about the fluke,
we overcompensated helping Cordelia.

282
00:23:42,785 --> 00:23:48,542
We spun the group dynamic out of orbit.
We're a meteor shower heading for Earth...

283
00:23:48,625 --> 00:23:52,016
OK, calm down. Let's put our heads together
and think of somethin'.

284
00:23:52,105 --> 00:23:55,223
OK, now, one of us here
is pretty darn smart, and I am...

285
00:23:56,785 --> 00:23:58,662
just in hell.

286
00:23:58,745 --> 00:24:01,385
I mean, I thought being a senior - at last -

287
00:24:01,465 --> 00:24:05,140
and having a girlfriend - at last -
would be a good thing.

288
00:24:05,225 --> 00:24:07,899
Now, why wouldn't that be a good thing?

289
00:24:08,545 --> 00:24:10,138
What?

290
00:24:10,225 --> 00:24:16,221
Sometimes when you're falling to pieces,
your mouth, it just does the sweetest thing.

291
00:24:20,385 --> 00:24:22,376
What are we gonna do?

292
00:24:22,465 --> 00:24:25,139
We just have to get
the two of them communicating.

293
00:24:25,225 --> 00:24:27,785
I'm talking about us.

294
00:24:46,545 --> 00:24:48,855
What's going on here?

295
00:24:48,945 --> 00:24:50,936
Where's Faith?

296
00:24:54,785 --> 00:24:58,380
"Dear Cordelia and Buffy.
We won't be riding to the dance with you."

297
00:24:58,465 --> 00:25:03,539
"Work out your problems. Our friendships
are more important than who wins."

298
00:25:03,625 --> 00:25:05,298
"Your friends."

299
00:25:05,385 --> 00:25:08,377
"PS. The limo was not cheap. Work it out."

300
00:25:11,705 --> 00:25:13,696
Well...

301
00:25:15,785 --> 00:25:18,777
- They bought us corsages?
- I took the orchid.

302
00:25:20,625 --> 00:25:21,979
OK.

303
00:25:36,705 --> 00:25:38,935
I don't see what the big deal is.

304
00:25:39,025 --> 00:25:44,145
I'm not making a big deal.
You wanted the orchid, you got the orchid.

305
00:25:44,225 --> 00:25:47,263
It goes with my complexion better.

306
00:25:47,345 --> 00:25:49,541
It does have that sallow tint.

307
00:25:52,105 --> 00:25:54,460
Finally we're here.

308
00:26:03,785 --> 00:26:05,503
What is this?

309
00:26:05,585 --> 00:26:09,465
OK, guys, we've had enough
of your stupid little games.

310
00:26:09,545 --> 00:26:12,344
What's massively wrong with this picture?

311
00:26:19,305 --> 00:26:22,616
<i>Hello, ladies. Welcome to SlayerFest '98.</i>

312
00:26:22,945 --> 00:26:25,300
<i>What is a SlayerFest, you ask?</i>

313
00:26:25,385 --> 00:26:29,379
<i>Well, as in most of life,
there's the hunters and the hunted.</i>

314
00:26:30,225 --> 00:26:32,216
<i>Can you guess where you two fall?</i>

315
00:26:32,705 --> 00:26:36,539
<i>From the beginning of this tape,
you have exactly 30 seconds...</i>

316
00:26:36,625 --> 00:26:41,142
<i>no, that's 17 now, to run for your lives.</i>

317
00:26:41,705 --> 00:26:44,174
<i>Faith, Buffy...</i>

318
00:26:44,265 --> 00:26:46,256
<i>Have a nice death.</i>

319
00:26:50,625 --> 00:26:53,139
Hello! How stupid are you people?

320
00:26:53,225 --> 00:26:55,785
She's a Slayer. I'm a Homecoming Queen.

321
00:27:16,865 --> 00:27:19,141
What are you two so mopy about?

322
00:27:19,225 --> 00:27:21,865
Oh, we're not mopy. We're groovin'.

323
00:27:21,945 --> 00:27:25,540
On Oz's band. He's a great guy, Oz.

324
00:27:25,625 --> 00:27:28,014
He wrote this song for me.

325
00:27:31,705 --> 00:27:33,264
Sleazebag.

326
00:27:36,745 --> 00:27:39,624
We have to find Buffy.
Something terrible's happened.

327
00:27:39,705 --> 00:27:42,299
Just kidding.
Thought I'd give you a scare.

328
00:27:43,025 --> 00:27:45,016
Are those finger sandwiches?

329
00:27:54,105 --> 00:27:55,504
I have an idea.

330
00:27:55,585 --> 00:28:00,216
We talk to these people, we explain
that I'm not a slayer and they let me go.

331
00:28:00,305 --> 00:28:02,137
Look out!

332
00:28:02,945 --> 00:28:04,697
Get down!

333
00:28:12,145 --> 00:28:14,216
That's gotta smart.

334
00:28:14,305 --> 00:28:17,138
I can let you out of that,
or put a bullet in your head.

335
00:28:17,225 --> 00:28:20,741
How many are there in this little game
and what are they packing?

336
00:28:22,225 --> 00:28:26,901
There's me, two Germans with AR-15s
and grenade launcher,

337
00:28:26,985 --> 00:28:31,297
yellow-skinned demon with long knives,
vampire couple from Texas named Gorch.

338
00:28:31,385 --> 00:28:33,979
- That everybody?
- Everybody who's out here.

339
00:28:34,065 --> 00:28:38,263
Germans are wired. Their boss is tracking 'em
on computer. Now get me out of this!

340
00:28:38,345 --> 00:28:43,897
Could I just ask you an eensy favour? Could
you just tell your friends that I'm not a sl...

341
00:28:49,505 --> 00:28:52,702
Scott? There you are, honey!
Hey, good news.

342
00:28:52,785 --> 00:28:57,939
Doctor says the itching and burning should
clear up, but we gotta use the ointment.

343
00:28:58,025 --> 00:29:00,016
Hi!

344
00:29:08,025 --> 00:29:10,619
I suspect the finger food contains

345
00:29:11,145 --> 00:29:13,136
actual fingers.

346
00:29:13,225 --> 00:29:16,536
I think I'll retreat to the library
until the coronation.

347
00:29:16,625 --> 00:29:20,903
I want to be here when Buffy...
Well, however the thing turns out for her.

348
00:29:21,545 --> 00:29:26,904
And that was a very fine thing you two did,
putting Buffy and Cordelia together.

349
00:29:32,145 --> 00:29:34,136
We did one fine thing.

350
00:29:35,145 --> 00:29:38,422
Yeah. They've been gone a while.
Must really be getting into it.

351
00:29:43,865 --> 00:29:47,460
We should be safe in here for a while.
You need to find a weapon.

352
00:29:48,545 --> 00:29:51,981
Safe? I'm not safe. I'm gonna die.

353
00:29:57,225 --> 00:29:59,614
Yeah, you are if you just stand there.

354
00:30:00,105 --> 00:30:02,984
I'm never gonna be crowned
Homecoming Queen.

355
00:30:03,065 --> 00:30:05,625
I'm never gonna graduate from high school.

356
00:30:05,705 --> 00:30:09,380
I'm never gonna know if it's real
between me and Xander, or if it's just

357
00:30:09,465 --> 00:30:12,776
some temporary insanity that made me think

358
00:30:12,865 --> 00:30:15,015
I loved him.

359
00:30:15,105 --> 00:30:18,302
And now I'm never
gonna get the chance to tell him.

360
00:30:19,705 --> 00:30:21,139
Yes, you are.

361
00:30:21,225 --> 00:30:25,298
We'll head back to the library,
where Giles and the rest of the weapons live.

362
00:30:25,385 --> 00:30:28,855
Then I'll take out the rest,
in time for you to congratulate me

363
00:30:28,945 --> 00:30:31,937
on my sweeping victory
as Homecoming Queen.

364
00:30:32,865 --> 00:30:34,856
I know what you're up to.

365
00:30:34,945 --> 00:30:38,654
You think if you get me mad enough,
I won't be so scared.

366
00:30:38,745 --> 00:30:43,216
And, hey! It's working.
Where's a damn weapon?

367
00:30:47,225 --> 00:30:51,378
- You really love Xander?
- Well, he kinda grows on you, like...

368
00:30:51,465 --> 00:30:53,456
a Chia Pet.

369
00:30:55,025 --> 00:30:58,143
- That's it?
- Just this and a telephone.

370
00:30:58,625 --> 00:31:02,141
A telephone.
And you didn't think that'd be helpful?

371
00:31:02,545 --> 00:31:04,536
No, this is better for...

372
00:31:09,465 --> 00:31:14,585
You're about to see why Daniel Boone and
that idiot demon are creatures of the past,

373
00:31:14,665 --> 00:31:17,134
and why I am the future.

374
00:31:17,225 --> 00:31:21,503
I'm picking up a signal. They've got a phone!

375
00:31:21,585 --> 00:31:25,374
If you get this message, Giles,
get help and get out here...

376
00:31:25,465 --> 00:31:26,660
Hello?

377
00:31:26,745 --> 00:31:30,136
- What happened?
- It went dead.

378
00:31:35,225 --> 00:31:38,616
- Want me to cut that leg off?
- No, thanks.

379
00:31:43,385 --> 00:31:47,583
<i>Continue proceeding south
90 metres to vector three.</i>

380
00:31:57,625 --> 00:32:02,825
<i>Giles, it's me. And Cordelia. We're in a cabin
in Miller's Woods, and we're in big trouble.</i>

381
00:32:05,225 --> 00:32:10,015
Why is it every time I go somewhere with
you, it always ends in violence and terror?

382
00:32:10,105 --> 00:32:13,336
- Welcome to my life.
- I don't wanna be in your life.

383
00:32:13,425 --> 00:32:15,416
I wanna be in my life.

384
00:32:16,145 --> 00:32:21,015
Well, there's the door. Please feel free
to walk out at any time and live your life.

385
00:32:21,105 --> 00:32:24,461
All I wanted was to be Homecoming Queen.

386
00:32:24,545 --> 00:32:27,139
And that's all I wanted too, Cordelia.

387
00:32:28,705 --> 00:32:31,777
I spent a year's allowance on this dress.

388
00:32:31,865 --> 00:32:37,304
I don't get why you care about Homecoming
when you're doing stuff like this.

389
00:32:37,385 --> 00:32:42,095
Because this is all I do.
This is what my life is.

390
00:32:47,785 --> 00:32:50,379
You couldn't understand.

391
00:32:51,865 --> 00:32:55,301
I just thought... Homecoming Queen.

392
00:32:55,785 --> 00:33:00,461
I could pick up a yearbook someday
and say "I was there."

393
00:33:00,545 --> 00:33:03,936
I went to high school, I had friends, and,

394
00:33:04,025 --> 00:33:07,814
for one moment, I got to live in the world.

395
00:33:08,785 --> 00:33:10,776
And there'd be proof.

396
00:33:13,025 --> 00:33:17,019
Proof that I was chosen
for something other than this.

397
00:33:20,545 --> 00:33:24,015
Besides... I look cute in a tiara.

398
00:33:25,505 --> 00:33:27,735
Do you hear...

399
00:33:38,025 --> 00:33:39,698
Cor, the gun!

400
00:33:50,225 --> 00:33:52,216
Cordelia, the spatula.

401
00:33:54,465 --> 00:33:56,024
Prepare to launch.

402
00:34:01,425 --> 00:34:04,338
<i>Target's in range. Ready your weapon.</i>

403
00:34:04,425 --> 00:34:07,816
<i>Y-axis 53 degrees west by 8 degrees south.</i>

404
00:34:15,545 --> 00:34:16,262
Launch.

405
00:34:38,225 --> 00:34:40,614
We gotta get back to the library.

406
00:34:54,785 --> 00:34:59,222
Easy, darlin'. These things go through you
faster than Grandpa Pete's chilli.

407
00:34:59,305 --> 00:35:04,141
I wanna do Buffy. My weddin' present
for what happened to your poor brother.

408
00:35:04,225 --> 00:35:06,614
- Tector.
- When's she comin'?

409
00:35:07,145 --> 00:35:08,863
Well, he's her watcher.

410
00:35:08,945 --> 00:35:12,904
She'll show - just as soon as she
gets rid of some of our competition.

411
00:35:18,225 --> 00:35:21,377
They're heading west. Back into town.

412
00:35:21,465 --> 00:35:24,742
- They got away?
- Temporarily.

413
00:35:24,825 --> 00:35:27,863
Well, give it up for the slayers.
They got character.

414
00:35:33,225 --> 00:35:35,216
I'll take care of it.

415
00:35:39,545 --> 00:35:42,059
Evening, gentlemen. How may I help you?

416
00:35:42,145 --> 00:35:45,536
Excuse me. Anybody got a warrant here?

417
00:35:46,705 --> 00:35:50,619
Jungle Bob and spike-head are down and out.
The Germans keep finding us.

418
00:35:50,705 --> 00:35:53,219
If we take them out,
we can still make Homecoming.

419
00:35:53,305 --> 00:35:56,855
Those animals! Hunting us down
like poor defenceless...

420
00:35:56,945 --> 00:35:58,982
Well, animals.

421
00:36:00,385 --> 00:36:02,899
We just need to find Gil...

422
00:36:19,305 --> 00:36:21,137
Candy!

423
00:36:24,865 --> 00:36:27,983
I'm gonna kill both you slayers for this!
You hear me?

424
00:36:28,065 --> 00:36:31,501
I hear you, you redneck moron.
You got a dress that goes with that hat?

425
00:36:31,585 --> 00:36:32,620
I'm gonna...

426
00:36:32,705 --> 00:36:36,664
Rip out my innards, play with my eyeballs,
boil my brain and eat it for brunch?

427
00:36:36,745 --> 00:36:41,774
Listen up, needle-brain. We've taken out
four of your cronies and your girlfriend.

428
00:36:41,865 --> 00:36:43,299
- Wife!
- Whatever.

429
00:36:43,385 --> 00:36:48,255
The point is, I haven't even broken a sweat.
See, in the end, Buffy's just the runner-up.

430
00:36:48,345 --> 00:36:53,135
I'm the queen. You get me mad,
what do you think I'm gonna do to you?

431
00:36:58,625 --> 00:37:00,616
Later.

432
00:37:08,865 --> 00:37:11,698
That should teach him
to mistake you for a slayer.

433
00:37:11,785 --> 00:37:14,698
Yes, I must admit I do feel partly responsible.

434
00:37:14,785 --> 00:37:18,540
I did give your friends tacit approval
to make the switch in the limousine.

435
00:37:18,625 --> 00:37:22,505
It's OK. It gave Cor and I a chance
to spend some quality death time.

436
00:37:22,785 --> 00:37:26,380
- And we got these free corsages.
- Oh. That's nice.

437
00:37:27,625 --> 00:37:30,378
Although I don't recall
them mentioning corsages.

438
00:37:30,465 --> 00:37:35,301
Jungle Bob said that the Germans
were hooked into a computer system.

439
00:37:38,225 --> 00:37:40,216
And they're hooked into us.

440
00:37:45,465 --> 00:37:49,015
- Oh God, get rid of these things.
- I need some wet toilet paper.

441
00:37:49,105 --> 00:37:50,982
Yeah! That'll help.

442
00:37:55,505 --> 00:37:57,894
<i>Transmitting coordinates now.</i>

443
00:37:59,425 --> 00:38:01,416
They're 50 feet away.

444
00:38:12,905 --> 00:38:15,499
<i>Axis 6 degrees by 43.</i>

445
00:38:16,905 --> 00:38:18,498
I have them in range.

446
00:38:23,225 --> 00:38:26,536
<i>I have the targets together,
20 feet north and stationary.</i>

447
00:38:26,625 --> 00:38:29,617
<i>Final position is locked. Fire when ready.</i>

448
00:38:34,665 --> 00:38:37,384
Both targets 7 degrees by 35.

449
00:38:41,225 --> 00:38:44,024
Adjust. Right ten degrees. Fire.

450
00:39:00,385 --> 00:39:02,376
I won.

451
00:39:15,305 --> 00:39:19,458
- Hello! Nice to meet you.
- Yeah. Hi, it's a pleasure. Where am I?

452
00:39:19,545 --> 00:39:22,697
In my office. I'm Richard Wilkins,
Mayor of Sunnydale.

453
00:39:22,785 --> 00:39:26,938
And you're... Mr Trick. Please, sit down.

454
00:39:29,545 --> 00:39:31,775
That's an exciting suit.

455
00:39:32,545 --> 00:39:36,539
- Well, clothes make the man.
- Well, as I understand it,

456
00:39:37,145 --> 00:39:39,341
you're not a man exactly.

457
00:39:39,945 --> 00:39:43,301
Mr Trick, I've been the Mayor
for quite some time.

458
00:39:43,385 --> 00:39:47,856
I like things to run smoothly.
This is a very important year for me.

459
00:39:47,945 --> 00:39:50,585
- Election year.
- Something like that.

460
00:39:51,545 --> 00:39:55,334
If you're telling me I don't fit in here
in your quiet neighbourhood,

461
00:39:55,425 --> 00:40:00,738
you can just skip it, cos that all got old
long before I became a vampire.

462
00:40:01,185 --> 00:40:03,745
Do you have children?

463
00:40:03,825 --> 00:40:09,377
Children are the heart of a community.
They need to be looked after. Controlled.

464
00:40:09,465 --> 00:40:13,015
The more rebellious element
needs to be dealt with.

465
00:40:13,105 --> 00:40:18,134
The children are our future.
We need them. I need them.

466
00:40:18,225 --> 00:40:22,264
If this rebellious element
means who I think it does,

467
00:40:22,345 --> 00:40:25,815
that problem may be
taken care of this very night.

468
00:40:26,265 --> 00:40:28,017
So I've heard.

469
00:40:28,105 --> 00:40:31,382
That's a very enterprising idea
you have: SlayerFest.

470
00:40:31,465 --> 00:40:36,983
I love that name, by the way. You see,
that's the kind of initiative I need on my team.

471
00:40:37,065 --> 00:40:42,014
- What if I don't wanna be a part of the team?
- Oh, no, that won't be an issue.

472
00:40:44,265 --> 00:40:47,144
See, you and I are gonna get along very well.

473
00:40:47,705 --> 00:40:49,696
Moist towelette?

474
00:40:52,025 --> 00:40:55,222
Hey, guys, the moment
we've all been waiting for.

475
00:40:57,145 --> 00:41:00,854
They're gonna announce the queen.
Where are they? What's keeping them?

476
00:41:00,945 --> 00:41:03,141
I'm gonna go with mud wrestling.

477
00:41:05,945 --> 00:41:09,779
- Oh, God! What did you do to each other?
- Long story.

478
00:41:09,865 --> 00:41:12,698
- Got hunted.
- Apparently not that long.

479
00:41:14,105 --> 00:41:18,303
Tell you one thing, though:
you don't wanna mess with Cordelia.

480
00:41:19,625 --> 00:41:21,457
No.

481
00:41:21,545 --> 00:41:25,857
In this envelope, I hold the name
of this year's Homecoming Queen.

482
00:41:27,225 --> 00:41:31,184
After all we've been through tonight,
this whole queen-capade seems pretty...

483
00:41:31,265 --> 00:41:33,461
- Damn important.
- Oh, yeah.

484
00:41:33,545 --> 00:41:35,536
And the winner is...

485
00:41:41,545 --> 00:41:45,778
Hey, I believe we have a first
for Sunnydale High. We have a tie.

486
00:41:45,865 --> 00:41:50,257
The winners are Holly Charleston
and Michelle Blake.

487
00:42:02,545 --> 00:42:05,139
I'm just so honoured.

488
00:42:05,225 --> 00:42:09,378
I can't believe it! I mean,
that you would pick me - or us -

489
00:42:09,465 --> 00:42:14,585
out of every girl in the whole school.
It's just so wonderful!

490
00:42:15,225 --> 00:42:18,422
I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry...

491
00:42:20,625 --> 00:42:23,538
Visiontext Subtitles: Claire Bates

492
00:42:56,065 --> 00:42:58,056
ENGLISH