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Previously on californication
2
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I think we should
go into business together.
4
00:00:04,267 --> 00:00:07,233
To be honest, i'm interviewing
for jobs in new york.
5
00:00:07,267 --> 00:00:08,634
So, how do you two
know each other?
6
00:00:08,667 --> 00:00:10,934
Hank is the father.
Alleged father.
7
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I'll raise the child,
and i'll love it as my own.
8
00:00:14,968 --> 00:00:16,034
Oh, my god.
9
00:00:16,068 --> 00:00:17,968
Look, look, look...
damien and becca.
10
00:00:18,001 --> 00:00:20,667
Because isn't that
the becca right there?
11
00:00:20,701 --> 00:00:21,968
Oh! Bec!
12
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I don't want to do
any more porn.
Really?
13
00:00:24,834 --> 00:00:27,567
I'd like the last person i had
on-Screen sex with to be you.
14
00:00:27,601 --> 00:00:28,667
Charlie:
all right, marcy.
15
00:00:28,701 --> 00:00:30,667
After all the shit
we've been through,
16
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I want to get a divorce.
17
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I'm gonna be with daisy.
18
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You fucked my man.
19
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Marcy,
i didn't mean...
20
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She's here.
She who?
21
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"She who"?
Janie, you asshole!
22
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Come on!
23
00:00:43,601 --> 00:00:44,701
What?
24
00:00:44,734 --> 00:00:46,701
Lew. Shit, lew.
25
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Lew!
26
00:00:48,068 --> 00:00:49,267
Lew!
27
00:00:49,300 --> 00:00:51,334
Lew?
28
00:01:59,068 --> 00:02:01,534
You got yourself
a bit of a ritual there, huh?
29
00:02:01,567 --> 00:02:02,934
Yep.
30
00:02:02,968 --> 00:02:07,601
Every time i finish a book,
whiskey, weed, and warren zevon.
31
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It's the little things.
32
00:02:09,434 --> 00:02:11,434
Yeah.
How'd it turn out?
Hard to say.
33
00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:14,567
You would know better than i.
You lived the motherfucker.
34
00:02:14,601 --> 00:02:15,667
Yeah,
but living it right
35
00:02:15,701 --> 00:02:17,233
Means you don't remember
much of it at all.
36
00:02:17,267 --> 00:02:19,400
Well, you can
read all about it here...
37
00:02:19,434 --> 00:02:20,867
Your dirty life and times.
38
00:02:23,133 --> 00:02:24,801
What's next?
39
00:02:24,834 --> 00:02:29,567
I suppose i try to get my life
back in order in some fashion.
40
00:02:29,601 --> 00:02:31,133
Yeah, you...
41
00:02:31,167 --> 00:02:32,734
You do that.
42
00:02:32,767 --> 00:02:35,968
Remember,
at the end of the day,
43
00:02:36,001 --> 00:02:37,867
It's all about her.
44
00:02:37,901 --> 00:02:39,767
Who?
45
00:02:39,801 --> 00:02:41,434
You know.
46
00:02:43,834 --> 00:02:47,001
I'll miss seeing you
around here, man.
47
00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:49,634
Gonna miss you, too.
48
00:02:52,068 --> 00:02:54,267
And it's true
what they say, you know.
49
00:02:54,300 --> 00:02:56,200
They got
one hell of a band.
50
00:04:17,634 --> 00:04:19,034
What up, buttercup?
51
00:04:20,934 --> 00:04:24,434
Oh, i just thought
i'd pay my last respects
52
00:04:24,467 --> 00:04:27,300
Before i hit the road.
53
00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:28,734
Where you headed?
54
00:04:28,767 --> 00:04:30,567
Oh, didn't you get
the memo?
Mnh-Mnh.
55
00:04:30,601 --> 00:04:32,701
I'm taking
"fucking & punching"
56
00:04:32,734 --> 00:04:34,300
All over this fair country
of ours.
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Coming soon to a supersized
bookstore near you.
58
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Mothers,
lock up your sons.
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00:04:39,267 --> 00:04:41,500
And husbands.
60
00:04:49,167 --> 00:04:50,834
I'm gonna miss him...
61
00:04:50,867 --> 00:04:52,734
Way more than i thought.
62
00:04:52,767 --> 00:04:54,400
Yeah,
i know the feeling.
63
00:04:54,434 --> 00:04:57,701
At first,
fucking him was...
64
00:04:57,734 --> 00:04:59,867
Was just a way
of yanking your chain.
65
00:04:59,901 --> 00:05:01,467
Really?
You don't say?
66
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:04,567
Yeah, but then he just had to
win me over, you know?
67
00:05:04,601 --> 00:05:07,200
Like some sweet,
mangy little puppy
68
00:05:07,233 --> 00:05:08,601
Who just wanted someone
to pet him
69
00:05:08,634 --> 00:05:09,901
And tell him
he was a good boy.
70
00:05:09,934 --> 00:05:12,767
Then he'd shit the rug.
Or hump your leg.
71
00:05:12,801 --> 00:05:14,467
Mm.
Where's your first stop?
72
00:05:14,500 --> 00:05:16,133
Uh, borders in tacoma.
73
00:05:16,167 --> 00:05:18,767
Know it. There's a great
coffee shop down the street.
74
00:05:18,801 --> 00:05:21,434
Around the block,
there's this old record store,
75
00:05:21,467 --> 00:05:23,834
Sells used vinyl, tons of it...
fantastic.
76
00:05:23,867 --> 00:05:26,767
Great... old guy's guide
to tacoma. Good to know.
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00:05:26,801 --> 00:05:30,400
Well, just be gentle with
our retarded love child.
78
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I will.
79
00:05:32,567 --> 00:05:34,901
Be good out there,
psycho.
80
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Tell 'em who sent you.
81
00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:51,801
Well, if it isn't
the madre of my bambino.
82
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,400
What's shakin', sweet duck?
83
00:05:53,434 --> 00:05:54,701
I got a job.
84
00:05:54,734 --> 00:05:55,901
A good job?
85
00:05:55,934 --> 00:05:59,167
A great job.
I mean, my dream job.
86
00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:00,701
Wow,
way to go, fancy pants.
87
00:06:00,734 --> 00:06:03,701
Yeah.
It's, um...
88
00:06:03,734 --> 00:06:04,968
It's in new york.
89
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Even better.
90
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Right.
I start monday.
91
00:06:08,801 --> 00:06:10,233
No time
like the present.
92
00:06:10,267 --> 00:06:12,767
Oh, my god. You're taking this
much better than i thought.
93
00:06:12,801 --> 00:06:14,100
Why shouldn't i?
94
00:06:14,133 --> 00:06:17,334
I've been trying to get
back to new york for years now.
95
00:06:17,367 --> 00:06:18,434
Hank.
96
00:06:18,467 --> 00:06:19,601
Karen.
97
00:06:19,634 --> 00:06:21,001
I got a job.
98
00:06:21,034 --> 00:06:23,133
You got a job.
That's what you just said.
99
00:06:23,167 --> 00:06:24,367
Not you.
100
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,300
No. Not...
i'm not following.
101
00:06:27,334 --> 00:06:30,100
No, you're not following.
I mean, you're not invited.
102
00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:32,767
That is fucked up.
103
00:06:32,801 --> 00:06:35,068
Well, this is not about
you or us, okay.
104
00:06:35,100 --> 00:06:36,534
This is about me and becca.
105
00:06:36,567 --> 00:06:38,200
But you can't
just whisk her away
106
00:06:38,233 --> 00:06:41,167
And expect me to sit here in
l.A. With a dry thumb up my ass.
107
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,367
Well, you know what?
108
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,801
You do have some serious shit
to deal with here.
109
00:06:44,834 --> 00:06:47,100
Karen,
i can write anywhere...
110
00:06:47,133 --> 00:06:49,901
Or not, as the case may be,
which is not the case.
111
00:06:49,934 --> 00:06:51,734
I just finished
the ashby book
112
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This morning,
as a matter of fact.
Good.
113
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Honey, i'm on fire...
good for you.
114
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... which is why
we should be together,
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Or, at the very least,
why i should be your manny.
116
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Do you laugh?
117
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My manny?
Yeah!
118
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You're a high-Powered
career gal now.
119
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You need somebody
to hold down the fort.
Right.
120
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A majordomo.
Thank you.
121
00:07:08,567 --> 00:07:09,801
I'm your man, woman.
122
00:07:09,834 --> 00:07:12,701
I'm not talking about your
writing or lack thereof, okay?
123
00:07:12,734 --> 00:07:16,100
I was talking about
the impending arrival
of your latest mistake.
124
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D-Did you forget?
125
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:19,867
Uh, sir francis drake
said he was totally down
126
00:07:19,901 --> 00:07:22,133
With raising
the little bastard as his own.
127
00:07:22,167 --> 00:07:24,400
You heard
the bearded woman.
Y-You're okay with that?
128
00:07:24,434 --> 00:07:26,133
I'm not entirely convinced
it's mine.
129
00:07:26,167 --> 00:07:27,767
You know,
i never came inside her.
130
00:07:27,801 --> 00:07:29,367
I don't...
i don't think i did.
131
00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:31,233
I mean,
when she broncoed me,
132
00:07:31,267 --> 00:07:33,068
I spasmed out
a little dog water, you know.
133
00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:34,068
Thank you.
134
00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:35,567
I'm still
holding out the hope
135
00:07:35,601 --> 00:07:38,001
That she banged some dude
in the p.F. Chang's parking lot
136
00:07:38,034 --> 00:07:39,701
While she was looking for
mr. Goodbar.
137
00:07:39,734 --> 00:07:41,734
I think that's
an entirely plausible scenario.
138
00:07:41,767 --> 00:07:43,300
There is something wrong
with you.
139
00:07:43,334 --> 00:07:44,434
Well, i'm special.
140
00:07:44,467 --> 00:07:45,901
I think i'm special.
I really do.
141
00:07:45,934 --> 00:07:48,901
What does jeff becca think about
you tearing our family apart?
142
00:07:48,934 --> 00:07:51,901
Well, no... right now...
she's heartbroken right now.
143
00:07:51,934 --> 00:07:53,367
Yeah, of course
she's heartbroken.
144
00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:54,834
You rip her away
from her old man,
145
00:07:54,867 --> 00:07:56,434
You don't invite him
to come with.
146
00:07:56,467 --> 00:07:57,567
That shit is harsh!
147
00:07:57,601 --> 00:07:59,133
She's heartbroken
about damien.
148
00:07:59,167 --> 00:08:00,233
What about damien?
149
00:08:00,267 --> 00:08:02,001
Well,
she saw him making out
150
00:08:02,034 --> 00:08:05,968
With someone else
at mia's party, so...
151
00:08:12,834 --> 00:08:15,233
Welcome to all american burger.
May i take your order?
152
00:08:15,267 --> 00:08:18,200
Can i get a jumbo "what the fuck
were you thinking?"
153
00:08:18,233 --> 00:08:20,801
That's the problem...
i wasn't thinking.
154
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:24,534
I mean,
she fucking kissed me, dude.
155
00:08:24,567 --> 00:08:30,034
That kind of shit just doesn't
just happen to me a lot...
156
00:08:30,068 --> 00:08:31,267
Like ever.
157
00:08:31,300 --> 00:08:35,133
W... w... yo.
158
00:08:35,167 --> 00:08:38,534
Be that as it may,
on the flip side,
159
00:08:38,567 --> 00:08:41,500
What i've got is a young girl
whose heart is broken.
160
00:08:41,534 --> 00:08:42,667
Yeah, i know.
161
00:08:42,701 --> 00:08:45,534
I know, and i feel all sorts
of awful about it.
162
00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:49,934
But, you know,
i've been thinking about it,
163
00:08:49,968 --> 00:08:54,267
And given the opportunity
to... to do it again,
164
00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:56,734
I don't think it would go
any differently, honestly.
165
00:08:56,767 --> 00:09:03,400
I mean, a beautiful girl
is kind enough to kiss you...
166
00:09:03,434 --> 00:09:05,367
Fuck,
you kiss her right back.
167
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,133
'Cause...
168
00:09:07,167 --> 00:09:09,068
You know,
who... who knows
169
00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:12,100
Where that kiss
is gonna take you?
170
00:09:17,734 --> 00:09:19,500
I went there
to kick his ass,
171
00:09:19,534 --> 00:09:21,567
And i stayed
to soak up his wisdom.
172
00:09:21,601 --> 00:09:24,601
They know more than we do...
the children. We forget.
173
00:09:24,634 --> 00:09:27,601
Which is why we end up
in these fucked-Up situations.
174
00:09:27,634 --> 00:09:29,467
Yeah. Selling bmws
in the valley...
175
00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:31,133
What the fuck, dude?
176
00:09:31,167 --> 00:09:33,934
Don't kid yourself, pal.
I always was.
177
00:09:33,968 --> 00:09:35,968
Selling writers, actors,
directors...
178
00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:37,167
It's all the same shit.
179
00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:39,001
Have you talked to
the marce?
180
00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:40,567
Through the lawyers.
181
00:09:40,601 --> 00:09:42,734
She's a little feral
right now...
182
00:09:42,767 --> 00:09:45,034
Wants to take me
for all i'm worth.
183
00:09:45,068 --> 00:09:46,834
Oh, no.
All four figures?
184
00:09:46,867 --> 00:09:48,968
I don't even care, really.
185
00:09:49,001 --> 00:09:50,834
I just want to be happy,
you know.
186
00:09:50,867 --> 00:09:53,233
That's all that matters now...
the big happy.
187
00:09:53,267 --> 00:09:55,334
Right... pimping rides,
living in a studio apartment
188
00:09:55,367 --> 00:09:56,867
In the valley
with a porno chick.
189
00:09:56,901 --> 00:10:00,034
Hey, hey, hey...
retired porno chick.
190
00:10:00,068 --> 00:10:02,100
She's taking
some groundlings classes.
191
00:10:02,133 --> 00:10:03,400
She's really quite funny.
192
00:10:03,434 --> 00:10:05,467
I am sure she's a deep-Throating
lucille ball.
193
00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:07,068
Bully for her,
but what about you?
194
00:10:07,100 --> 00:10:10,233
Does this work for you,
give you the big happy?
195
00:10:10,267 --> 00:10:12,867
More than you know, pal.
I feel like i'm 23 again.
196
00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,867
You know, life is simple.
It's good.
197
00:10:15,901 --> 00:10:17,601
Money's a little tight,
you know.
198
00:10:17,634 --> 00:10:19,867
I think i'm gonna have to use
the office xerox
199
00:10:19,901 --> 00:10:21,068
To copy your manuscript.
200
00:10:21,100 --> 00:10:23,200
I'm so happy
i stayed with you.
201
00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:26,400
Me too. Good for us.
We're making shit happen.
202
00:10:26,434 --> 00:10:27,667
Let's go, runkle.
203
00:10:27,701 --> 00:10:30,001
You got to be on that
sales floor at all times.
204
00:10:30,034 --> 00:10:33,367
A.B.C., baby...
"always be closing."
205
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,500
Yes, sir!
206
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:38,068
"A.B.C., baby...
'always be closing'".
207
00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:39,200
These fucking guys...
208
00:10:39,233 --> 00:10:40,701
They all think
they're the only one
209
00:10:40,734 --> 00:10:42,267
Who ever saw
"glengarry glen ross."
210
00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:43,601
Hey, if you want,
211
00:10:43,634 --> 00:10:45,767
I'll take you out back
and shoot you.
212
00:10:45,801 --> 00:10:47,068
I will let you know.
213
00:10:47,100 --> 00:10:48,734
That number, my friend,
214
00:10:48,767 --> 00:10:52,634
Puts you in a beautiful
'07 convertible with navigation.
215
00:10:52,667 --> 00:10:54,968
Oh, you're good.
216
00:10:55,001 --> 00:10:58,100
How we doing over here?
Chuck runkle.
217
00:10:58,133 --> 00:10:59,467
Man:
nice to meet you.
218
00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:01,400
There goes my agent.
219
00:11:05,801 --> 00:11:07,867
I'm sick to my stomach.
220
00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:10,034
It's gonna get better.
I promise.
221
00:11:10,068 --> 00:11:11,534
Maybe it does,
maybe it doesn't.
222
00:11:11,567 --> 00:11:12,801
Well...
223
00:11:12,834 --> 00:11:15,100
Either way, dad,
words don't help.
Yeah.
224
00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:18,334
I suddenly understand the appeal
of cigarettes and alcohol.
225
00:11:18,367 --> 00:11:21,001
Here's an idea... why don't you
hang behind with me
226
00:11:21,034 --> 00:11:22,734
And nurse
your broken heart?
227
00:11:22,767 --> 00:11:25,100
We could, uh,
smoke some cigarettes,
228
00:11:25,133 --> 00:11:27,133
Pass the bottle,
listen to some blues.
229
00:11:27,167 --> 00:11:28,434
It'll be fun.
230
00:11:28,467 --> 00:11:30,200
Hank, that is
very manipulative.
231
00:11:30,233 --> 00:11:32,968
No! It's not.
It's not manipulative.
232
00:11:33,001 --> 00:11:34,734
Dad...
it's a suggestion.
233
00:11:34,767 --> 00:11:37,334
... i'm going with mom.
I need a change of scenery.
234
00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:39,801
I don't want to be
driving down the street
235
00:11:39,834 --> 00:11:42,167
And be reminded of all
the places we kissed.
236
00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:43,400
"All the places"?!
237
00:11:43,434 --> 00:11:46,267
What kind of an operation
are you... running here?
238
00:11:46,300 --> 00:11:47,667
What the hell?
239
00:11:47,701 --> 00:11:49,834
Hey, no, don't answer that.
It's rude.
240
00:11:49,867 --> 00:11:51,634
No, it's sonja.
It could be important.
241
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,300
Well, really
don't answer it.
242
00:11:53,334 --> 00:11:55,200
No! It's around
the due date, right?
243
00:11:55,233 --> 00:11:56,867
Right to voicemail...
that's what it's for.
244
00:11:56,901 --> 00:11:58,167
No, no.
Excuse me, sweetie.
245
00:11:58,200 --> 00:11:59,601
Hey, sonja.
246
00:11:59,634 --> 00:12:01,267
You are?
247
00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:03,367
Drugs!
I want some fucking drugs!
248
00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,801
Fuck! Can't you hippies
make this shit stop?!
249
00:12:06,834 --> 00:12:08,767
Breathe, mommy.
It's all about transc...
250
00:12:08,801 --> 00:12:11,968
Okay, you know what? Fuck you,
you stupid fucking doula!
251
00:12:12,001 --> 00:12:14,367
Hey.
Oh, god.
Hey. Hi, guys.
252
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,200
Thanks.
Thanks for coming.
253
00:12:16,233 --> 00:12:17,367
And by the way, hank,
fuck you
254
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:19,334
For putting this goddamn monster
in my stomach.
255
00:12:19,367 --> 00:12:21,701
I'm not entirely sure it's mine.
There will be some genetic...
256
00:12:21,734 --> 00:12:23,834
Hank,
do not be an asshole!
257
00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:26,001
You're right, and when
you're right, you're right.
258
00:12:26,034 --> 00:12:29,001
Let's get the little fucker out
first, then we're gonna test.
259
00:12:29,034 --> 00:12:31,968
Oh, hey, look at you.
Look who showed up.
260
00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:34,634
I'm back.
The man's back.
261
00:12:34,667 --> 00:12:35,867
Have you been drinking?
262
00:12:35,901 --> 00:12:38,034
Just a little tequila
for the pain.
263
00:12:38,068 --> 00:12:41,233
You bearded fucking lunatic.
Who do you think you are?!
264
00:12:41,267 --> 00:12:42,867
You're stressed out,
huh?!
265
00:12:42,901 --> 00:12:44,534
You need a drink?!
Shh.
266
00:12:44,567 --> 00:12:46,001
You know what?
Don't come near me.
267
00:12:46,034 --> 00:12:48,801
I'll rip his fucking handlebars
right off your fucking face!
268
00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:50,034
I'll do it.
Fucking drunk.
269
00:12:50,068 --> 00:12:52,034
Come on. You got to get
your shit together.
270
00:12:52,068 --> 00:12:55,901
It's time to stand up
and extract that little
artist within. Come on.
271
00:12:55,934 --> 00:12:57,767
I'm just a fraud,
hank.
272
00:12:57,801 --> 00:12:59,167
I know,
but it's time to stand up.
273
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:01,034
No.
Take the dress off
already.
274
00:13:01,068 --> 00:13:02,567
Oh, stop.
275
00:13:02,601 --> 00:13:04,834
I am.
Don't. Don't.
276
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:07,400
No, actually, actually,
that's good. That's good.
277
00:13:07,434 --> 00:13:09,001
You march over there
with those tears,
278
00:13:09,034 --> 00:13:10,867
And you tell her
those are tears of joy, okay?
279
00:13:10,901 --> 00:13:12,901
She will swoon.
Trust me. Go.
280
00:13:12,934 --> 00:13:13,934
Okay.
You go.
281
00:13:13,968 --> 00:13:15,801
Thank you.
Yes, you're welcome.
282
00:13:15,834 --> 00:13:16,834
You're beautiful.
283
00:13:18,801 --> 00:13:20,001
Just go.
284
00:13:20,034 --> 00:13:21,701
No,
you got to go alone.
285
00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:26,767
Okay,
i'm just gonna...
286
00:13:26,801 --> 00:13:28,834
What the fuck, julian?
287
00:13:28,867 --> 00:13:30,434
I'm crying.
Are you crying?
288
00:13:30,467 --> 00:13:32,400
Yeah.
What the fuck?!
289
00:13:32,434 --> 00:13:34,901
I'm the one fucking pushing out
a goddamn bowling ball
290
00:13:34,934 --> 00:13:37,867
Out of my pussy...
my sweet, beautiful pussy
291
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,534
That is never gonna
look the same again!
292
00:13:39,567 --> 00:13:41,200
I should be crying!
You are crying.
293
00:13:41,233 --> 00:13:43,701
I did have a pretty pussy,
didn't i, hank?
294
00:13:43,734 --> 00:13:45,734
Oh, my god, yes.
I mean, a beautiful pussy.
295
00:13:45,767 --> 00:13:47,867
I would put it in
the top 10 of pussies.
296
00:13:47,901 --> 00:13:49,634
I love
your pussy, too.
297
00:13:49,667 --> 00:13:52,200
Your p... you know, not...
no disrespect to yours.
298
00:13:52,233 --> 00:13:54,767
Karen... number-One pussy
in the world, with a bullet.
299
00:13:54,801 --> 00:13:56,467
Fuck you.
300
00:14:07,367 --> 00:14:09,667
Lover!
301
00:14:09,701 --> 00:14:11,034
You home?
302
00:14:22,133 --> 00:14:24,801
Oh, yeah.
303
00:14:24,834 --> 00:14:26,434
Charlie.
304
00:14:26,467 --> 00:14:27,901
Oh, shit.
305
00:14:27,934 --> 00:14:30,767
I know that look.
He's gonna blow.
306
00:14:30,801 --> 00:14:33,068
Slow it down, runkle.
307
00:14:36,901 --> 00:14:38,968
Forget it, jake.
It's vaginatown!
308
00:14:40,367 --> 00:14:42,968
I know.
That's the only way...
309
00:14:43,001 --> 00:14:45,200
Charlie,
what are you doing?
310
00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:48,334
I'm sorry.
311
00:14:48,367 --> 00:14:50,434
Can you just wait outside
for a second?
312
00:14:50,467 --> 00:14:52,300
Sure thing, babe.
313
00:14:57,001 --> 00:14:58,667
I'm sorry, baby.
I just...
314
00:14:58,701 --> 00:15:01,867
I thought i was gonna be
by myself for a while, you know?
315
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,100
I... who's that?
316
00:15:03,133 --> 00:15:04,467
Oh, just a guy
from my groundlings class.
317
00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:05,634
We were gonna work on
a sketch.
318
00:15:05,667 --> 00:15:08,167
Oh, okay.
Wow. I'm really sorry.
319
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,634
I just... i thought i was gonna
have a few minutes to myself.
320
00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:11,901
Oh, it's okay.
321
00:15:11,934 --> 00:15:13,867
You know i'm totally fine
with you masturbating.
322
00:15:13,901 --> 00:15:17,968
It's just kind of weird
when you bring somebody over.
323
00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:22,667
I understand, and it's important
that we set these ground rules.
324
00:15:22,701 --> 00:15:24,434
Gus?
325
00:15:24,467 --> 00:15:25,534
Oh.
326
00:15:25,567 --> 00:15:28,200
Um, gus, this is
my lover, charlie.
327
00:15:28,233 --> 00:15:29,233
Gus, chuck runkle.
328
00:15:31,801 --> 00:15:33,233
Hey, charlie.
329
00:15:33,267 --> 00:15:34,534
Uh, should we start?
330
00:15:34,567 --> 00:15:35,634
Oh, fuck.
331
00:15:35,667 --> 00:15:37,534
Here it comes.
Woman: okay.
332
00:15:37,567 --> 00:15:38,701
Fuck.
Okay, it's time.
333
00:15:38,734 --> 00:15:40,901
Oh, yeah.
Breathe, breathe.
334
00:15:40,934 --> 00:15:43,267
Okay, go, sonja.
Go! Yes!
335
00:15:43,300 --> 00:15:44,500
Fuck!
336
00:15:47,567 --> 00:15:48,901
Push. Push!
337
00:15:48,934 --> 00:15:51,233
Oh, my god!
338
00:15:51,267 --> 00:15:53,167
Oh, look.
339
00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:55,767
What the fuck?!
340
00:15:56,968 --> 00:15:58,901
Boooooo-Ya!
341
00:15:58,934 --> 00:16:01,634
Baby is black!
Karen!
342
00:16:01,667 --> 00:16:03,767
Damn it, the baby's black.
You see that shit?!
343
00:16:03,801 --> 00:16:05,500
Goddamn it!
I didn't knock her up.
344
00:16:05,534 --> 00:16:07,534
I know!
I love you.
345
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:09,034
I love you.
Ohh.
346
00:16:09,068 --> 00:16:11,500
Congratulations, mommy.
347
00:16:11,534 --> 00:16:14,934
Bathe the child,
and bring him to me.
348
00:16:14,968 --> 00:16:16,734
I forgot about
that fucking barista.
349
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:18,801
He was so hot.
He looked like lenny kravitz.
350
00:16:18,834 --> 00:16:20,034
Fuck.
351
00:16:20,068 --> 00:16:22,567
I said, bathe the infant,
and bring him to me.
352
00:16:22,601 --> 00:16:23,701
Coming. Coming.
353
00:16:23,734 --> 00:16:25,734
Fuck, i forgot.
I'm sorry, hank.
354
00:16:27,167 --> 00:16:28,767
Yes.
355
00:16:28,801 --> 00:16:31,801
Oh, yes.
356
00:16:31,834 --> 00:16:33,200
I will raise...
357
00:16:33,233 --> 00:16:36,567
This black baby
as my own.
358
00:16:36,601 --> 00:16:39,734
Before you drop him,
you fucking drunk, come here.
359
00:16:39,767 --> 00:16:43,367
I will raise this black baby
as my own.
360
00:16:44,801 --> 00:16:46,867
As my own.
361
00:16:46,901 --> 00:16:48,567
Yeah.
362
00:16:48,601 --> 00:16:49,968
Oh.
363
00:16:50,001 --> 00:16:53,334
He's beautiful.
Congratulations.
364
00:16:53,367 --> 00:16:55,567
He looks like me.
He doesn't
look like you.
365
00:16:58,334 --> 00:16:59,767
Hey, lover.
366
00:16:59,801 --> 00:17:00,767
Hey!
367
00:17:03,767 --> 00:17:05,068
How'd it go?
368
00:17:05,100 --> 00:17:06,068
Good.
369
00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,534
I think it's gonna be
really funny.
370
00:17:08,567 --> 00:17:10,567
Good. Good.
371
00:17:10,601 --> 00:17:12,434
I had sex with gus.
372
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:15,400
What?
373
00:17:15,434 --> 00:17:17,233
I got confused.
374
00:17:17,267 --> 00:17:19,634
You got confused?
What the fuck does that mean?
375
00:17:19,667 --> 00:17:22,001
Well, i've never
done a scene like that before,
376
00:17:22,034 --> 00:17:24,767
And we got to the kissing part,
and i got all confused.
377
00:17:24,801 --> 00:17:27,001
My autopilot kicked in,
and i kissed him for real,
378
00:17:27,034 --> 00:17:29,200
And the next thing you know,
he was inside me.
379
00:17:29,233 --> 00:17:31,034
That sounds like rape.
380
00:17:31,068 --> 00:17:32,367
No, not really...
381
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,233
Unless he wants to
press charges.
382
00:17:34,267 --> 00:17:36,434
It felt good.
He had a really nice cock.
383
00:17:36,467 --> 00:17:38,567
Jesus christ, daisy!
384
00:17:38,601 --> 00:17:39,834
I'm sorry.
385
00:17:39,867 --> 00:17:41,167
Does that
make you feel bad?
386
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,500
Yeah, it makes me feel bad!
It makes me want to throw up!
387
00:17:43,534 --> 00:17:45,767
Do you want me
to suck your dick?
388
00:17:45,801 --> 00:17:47,634
No!
389
00:17:48,867 --> 00:17:50,001
Yes.
390
00:17:50,034 --> 00:17:52,200
I don't know.
Now i'm confused.
391
00:17:52,233 --> 00:17:55,400
See?!
This is confusing stuff!
392
00:17:55,434 --> 00:17:57,200
Maybe we should
take a break.
393
00:17:57,233 --> 00:18:00,068
"Take a break"?!
I just left my wife for you!
394
00:18:00,100 --> 00:18:01,667
I didn't ask you to,
charlie!
395
00:18:01,701 --> 00:18:03,400
I know!
396
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:09,034
It just... seemed incredibly
romantic at the time.
397
00:18:09,068 --> 00:18:10,467
It was.
398
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:14,034
Maybe we should have some sex,
just fuck through the pain.
399
00:18:14,068 --> 00:18:17,034
O... kay.
400
00:18:17,068 --> 00:18:21,500
Okay, citizen,
fuck the gus out of me.
401
00:18:37,601 --> 00:18:40,701
Why didn't you
pinch me?
402
00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:46,567
Jesus! Woman!
403
00:18:46,601 --> 00:18:48,567
Uhh,
i'm tapping out.
404
00:18:49,767 --> 00:18:53,300
You had me looking for
the fucking rodeo clown.
405
00:18:53,334 --> 00:18:54,434
Really?
406
00:18:56,601 --> 00:18:58,100
Hey, you know what?
407
00:18:58,133 --> 00:19:01,300
I think you should come
to new york.
408
00:19:04,300 --> 00:19:05,701
Well.
409
00:19:07,267 --> 00:19:09,233
Why the change of heart?
410
00:19:09,267 --> 00:19:12,068
I can't live
without this.
411
00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:14,100
I thought
maybe it was 'cause
412
00:19:14,133 --> 00:19:15,968
You wanted to make
a black baby with me.
413
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:19,100
No,
i just need a manny.
414
00:19:19,133 --> 00:19:20,601
Oh, i have
excellent references.
415
00:19:21,767 --> 00:19:26,133
Plus, my vagina's become
really attached to you.
416
00:19:26,167 --> 00:19:27,801
Not your heart?
Just your vag?
417
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,467
Well,
it's tough if, you know,
418
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:31,867
The heart and the vag
are not on the same page.
419
00:19:31,901 --> 00:19:34,701
But, you know what?
In this instance, they are.
420
00:19:34,734 --> 00:19:37,400
Well, that's terrific
because i am all about
421
00:19:37,434 --> 00:19:39,400
Improving heart/vag
relations, you know?
422
00:19:39,434 --> 00:19:40,400
It's my thing.
423
00:19:40,434 --> 00:19:42,200
So we're in sync.
Mm-Hmm.
424
00:19:42,233 --> 00:19:44,734
Should we
take advantage of that?
425
00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:45,901
Could... could we...
426
00:19:45,934 --> 00:19:47,100
Round two?
Yeah.
427
00:19:47,133 --> 00:19:49,434
I'm answering
the bell.
428
00:19:49,467 --> 00:19:51,901
You got five minutes,
runkle.
429
00:19:54,068 --> 00:19:55,400
You look beautiful.
430
00:19:55,434 --> 00:19:57,834
That's right,
motherfucker, i do.
431
00:19:57,867 --> 00:19:59,367
I've always
looked beautiful.
432
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:00,634
That's true.
You have.
433
00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,934
Then why the fuck
did you have to go
434
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:05,901
And stick your dick
into some skanky porno chick?
435
00:20:05,934 --> 00:20:07,634
I don't know.
436
00:20:07,667 --> 00:20:08,968
I got confused.
437
00:20:09,001 --> 00:20:11,068
You could've stayed
with me.
438
00:20:11,100 --> 00:20:12,601
You were number 19.
439
00:20:12,634 --> 00:20:15,834
There were 18 cocks
before you, charlie...
440
00:20:15,867 --> 00:20:18,801
Not a ton,
not a rogues gallery,
441
00:20:18,834 --> 00:20:21,701
But enough to know
that i liked yours the best.
442
00:20:21,734 --> 00:20:24,601
Not the longest,
not the thickest,
443
00:20:24,634 --> 00:20:28,367
Little bit of english on it,
but it was mine... all mine.
444
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,233
And now you
and your cock
445
00:20:30,267 --> 00:20:32,667
Have betrayed me
for the last time.
446
00:20:32,701 --> 00:20:33,834
Don't go, marce.
447
00:20:33,867 --> 00:20:35,068
I'm already gone, baby.
448
00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:36,233
I was gone the moment
449
00:20:36,267 --> 00:20:38,500
That you said
you wanted to be with daisy.
450
00:20:38,534 --> 00:20:41,367
You said it out loud!
You can't take it back.
451
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:46,267
Oh, and, uh... your friend
ronny praeger called.
452
00:20:46,300 --> 00:20:49,167
He said something about
intense video wanting to
453
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:51,434
"Buy 'vaginatown'
454
00:20:51,467 --> 00:20:52,968
For a shitload of money."
455
00:20:53,001 --> 00:20:54,300
Really?
456
00:20:54,334 --> 00:20:55,534
That's good news.
457
00:20:55,567 --> 00:20:58,467
Oh, hells yeah.
It's great news... for me.
458
00:20:59,667 --> 00:21:02,300
What? You said
i could have everything.
459
00:21:02,334 --> 00:21:04,534
But don't worry your
pretty little head about it.
460
00:21:04,567 --> 00:21:06,068
We'll let my lawyer
figure it out.
461
00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:07,267
He's really good.
462
00:21:08,867 --> 00:21:10,834
Later, runkle.
463
00:21:14,834 --> 00:21:18,834
Where's my ipod?
I can't find my fucking ipod!
464
00:21:20,034 --> 00:21:21,767
Bec...
465
00:21:21,801 --> 00:21:24,167
It's gonna be
a long trip.
466
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,567
Yeah.
467
00:21:27,734 --> 00:21:29,601
What?
468
00:21:29,634 --> 00:21:31,934
Something pubescent
this way comes.
469
00:21:34,500 --> 00:21:37,667
Okay, i know
you hate me right now.
470
00:21:37,701 --> 00:21:38,834
I do.
471
00:21:38,867 --> 00:21:41,734
Okay, but i figured
i'd hate myself even more
472
00:21:41,767 --> 00:21:45,634
If i didn't, you know,
at least say goodbye.
473
00:21:47,734 --> 00:21:49,233
That's it?
474
00:21:49,267 --> 00:21:50,734
That's the best
you can do?
475
00:21:50,767 --> 00:21:53,034
Here,
i got you something.
476
00:21:55,934 --> 00:21:57,934
I put a playlist
on there...
477
00:21:57,968 --> 00:22:00,534
Our playlist...
the one we made out to...
478
00:22:00,567 --> 00:22:02,167
All 17 songs.
479
00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:04,367
What?! 17 songs?
480
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,233
That's a lot
of making out.
481
00:22:06,267 --> 00:22:07,601
Hank,
could you shut up?
482
00:22:07,634 --> 00:22:08,767
He said 17 songs.
483
00:22:08,801 --> 00:22:10,267
I still
loathe you.
484
00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:12,968
I know. I know.
And you have every right.
485
00:22:13,001 --> 00:22:15,200
I do feel like
i was unjustly seduced,
486
00:22:15,233 --> 00:22:17,267
But i know that doesn't
make it okay.
487
00:22:17,300 --> 00:22:19,300
Anyway, i just wish
you weren't leaving 'cause...
488
00:22:21,233 --> 00:22:25,567
'Cause i... i love you...
becca moody.
489
00:22:25,601 --> 00:22:29,400
You're like the only
post-Punk, heavy-Metal chick
490
00:22:29,434 --> 00:22:32,068
Who's ever
truly rocked my world.
491
00:22:40,133 --> 00:22:42,801
Is it okay if we go upstairs
for a minute?
492
00:22:42,834 --> 00:22:44,100
Of course...
no fucking way.
493
00:22:44,133 --> 00:22:46,133
No, no, no.
You take it out on the strand
494
00:22:46,167 --> 00:22:48,467
Where there are people,
and i'm watching you...
495
00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:50,034
Eyes in the back
of my head.
496
00:22:50,068 --> 00:22:51,300
As always.
497
00:22:53,167 --> 00:22:55,167
Hey, damien.
498
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,601
Well played.
499
00:22:56,634 --> 00:22:58,334
Big ups.
500
00:23:00,867 --> 00:23:03,367
You know, that was
a nice parental move.
501
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:05,133
I... yeah.
502
00:23:05,167 --> 00:23:07,534
I kind of...
503
00:23:07,567 --> 00:23:09,267
I like the way
you handled that shit.
504
00:23:09,300 --> 00:23:11,068
That's right,
mothafuckah!
505
00:23:13,300 --> 00:23:17,968
I feel kind of bad
splitting them up right now.
506
00:23:20,467 --> 00:23:21,834
Well, then don't.
507
00:23:21,867 --> 00:23:23,767
What do you mean?
508
00:23:23,801 --> 00:23:25,801
You go. I stay.
509
00:23:27,300 --> 00:23:29,534
Are you crazy?
510
00:23:29,567 --> 00:23:31,701
What, you think
i'd leave becca behind?
511
00:23:31,734 --> 00:23:34,001
Well, i'm not gonna break her.
I promise.
512
00:23:34,034 --> 00:23:36,334
Well, hold on a second.
What about you?
513
00:23:36,367 --> 00:23:38,300
I mean,
you'd give up new york?
514
00:23:38,334 --> 00:23:40,634
For her, yeah.
515
00:23:40,667 --> 00:23:44,867
At the end of the day,
it's all about her.
516
00:23:44,901 --> 00:23:47,500
It's always been about her.
517
00:23:47,534 --> 00:23:51,001
What happens between us,
i can't fucking control.
518
00:23:51,034 --> 00:23:53,068
Lord knows
i've tried every which way.
519
00:23:53,100 --> 00:23:54,467
But what i can do
520
00:23:54,500 --> 00:23:57,701
Is be the absolute best
i can be for her.
521
00:23:57,734 --> 00:23:59,934
If i followed you
to new york,
522
00:23:59,968 --> 00:24:02,233
I'd just be
hoping against hope
523
00:24:02,267 --> 00:24:04,701
That we lived
happily ever after.
524
00:24:04,734 --> 00:24:07,133
Maybe we do.
Maybe we don't.
525
00:24:07,167 --> 00:24:10,634
But you got some shit
you got to do, lady.
526
00:24:10,667 --> 00:24:12,667
I think you should do it.
527
00:24:12,701 --> 00:24:15,734
I'll hold down the fort...
528
00:24:15,767 --> 00:24:18,034
Keep her off the pole.
529
00:24:20,367 --> 00:24:22,500
Oh, jesus.
530
00:24:22,534 --> 00:24:26,100
I wish you hadn't
just said all that.
531
00:24:26,133 --> 00:24:27,767
Why?
532
00:24:27,801 --> 00:24:29,068
I don't know.
533
00:24:29,100 --> 00:24:32,901
'Cause, you know, it just
makes me love you even more.
534
00:24:32,934 --> 00:24:36,767
Yeah, well...
that really can't be helped.
535
00:24:36,801 --> 00:24:38,500
I am me, after all.
536
00:24:48,068 --> 00:24:50,500
A quick one
while they're away?
537
00:24:50,534 --> 00:24:51,901
You're disgusting.
538
00:24:51,934 --> 00:24:53,434
Mm.
539
00:25:44,267 --> 00:25:47,367
Look, just because
it's you and me now, alone,
540
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:50,133
Doesn't mean i'm gonna let you
get away with stuff.
541
00:25:50,167 --> 00:25:51,400
It's good.
542
00:25:51,434 --> 00:25:53,867
'Cause i'm not gonna let you
get away with stuff either.
543
00:25:53,901 --> 00:25:55,934
Oh, really? What are...
what are you gonna do?
544
00:25:55,968 --> 00:25:57,068
I'm not scared of you.
545
00:25:57,100 --> 00:25:58,934
You're... you're...
you're very diminutive,
546
00:25:58,968 --> 00:26:01,068
You know,
and i know jujitsu.
547
00:26:01,100 --> 00:26:02,901
I can still
kick your ass.
548
00:26:02,934 --> 00:26:04,867
Yeah,
at "guitar hero," maybe.
549
00:26:07,133 --> 00:26:08,367
Hey.
Hey, yourself.
550
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:09,834
Is this
your offspring?
551
00:26:09,867 --> 00:26:12,701
Yes, this is, uh,
this is becca, my daughter,
552
00:26:12,734 --> 00:26:14,034
And this is...
553
00:26:15,601 --> 00:26:17,500
This is surfer girl.
554
00:26:17,534 --> 00:26:19,634
Hello,
surfer girl.
555
00:26:19,667 --> 00:26:21,068
It's michelle.
556
00:26:21,100 --> 00:26:23,034
My name
is michelle.
Okay.
557
00:26:23,068 --> 00:26:25,467
I'm gonna go check out
that head shop.
558
00:26:25,500 --> 00:26:27,467
I'll be watching.
N...
559
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:30,300
Eyes in back
of my head.
560
00:26:30,334 --> 00:26:31,334
Head shop.
561
00:26:31,367 --> 00:26:32,867
Oh, boy.
562
00:26:32,901 --> 00:26:34,901
Cute kid.
563
00:26:34,934 --> 00:26:36,334
She has her moments.
564
00:26:36,367 --> 00:26:39,567
So, michelle, huh?
That's... that's interesting.
565
00:26:39,601 --> 00:26:41,901
You're disappointed,
aren't you?
566
00:26:41,934 --> 00:26:44,601
Well, you know,
i did kind of like not knowing.
567
00:26:44,634 --> 00:26:45,867
It was... it was cool
568
00:26:45,901 --> 00:26:48,167
In a "last tango in paris"
kind of way.
569
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:51,034
I think you mythologize me
just a little too much.
570
00:26:52,634 --> 00:26:55,068
You know,
i'm just a normal girl...
571
00:26:55,100 --> 00:26:58,034
With normal wants
and needs.
572
00:26:58,068 --> 00:27:01,901
You know, i have been around
the block a time or two, lady,
573
00:27:01,934 --> 00:27:04,767
And there ain't
nothing normal about you.
574
00:27:04,801 --> 00:27:08,200
Aw, you're still the sweetest
guy i ever fucked and robbed.
575
00:27:08,233 --> 00:27:10,500
You know, i'd like nothing more
than to get high,
576
00:27:10,534 --> 00:27:13,167
Fuck you goofy, and indulge
your larcenous tendencies,
577
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:19,167
But i have a, uh,
serious child-Raising...
578
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:20,167
Problem here.
579
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:21,334
Look at that.
580
00:27:21,367 --> 00:27:23,901
I think she's...
she's looking for a bong.
581
00:27:31,801 --> 00:27:33,934
And the dance
continues.
582
00:27:33,968 --> 00:27:35,133
So it does.
583
00:27:44,267 --> 00:27:45,601
She seems nice.
584
00:27:45,634 --> 00:27:48,200
I don't know if "nice"
is exactly the word.
585
00:27:48,233 --> 00:27:50,233
Have you been intimate
with her?
586
00:27:50,267 --> 00:27:52,634
Why do you got to
talk to me like that?!
587
00:27:52,667 --> 00:27:53,901
What?
588
00:27:53,934 --> 00:27:56,300
You're always up in my grill
about boys.
589
00:27:56,334 --> 00:27:59,734
Well, and up in your grill
i always will be. Count on it.
590
00:27:59,767 --> 00:28:01,001
Don't stop, okay?
591
00:28:01,034 --> 00:28:04,267
Even if i curse your name
on a semi-Daily basis.
592
00:28:04,300 --> 00:28:06,968
I wouldn't dream of it.
He gig.
593
00:28:07,001 --> 00:28:08,367
Hey.
594
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:11,267
Oh.
What's this for?
595
00:28:11,300 --> 00:28:13,767
For staying.
596
00:28:13,801 --> 00:28:16,267
You're stuck
on the island now.
597
00:28:16,300 --> 00:28:18,034
And you did it for me.
598
00:28:18,068 --> 00:28:19,567
What are you
talking about?
599
00:28:19,601 --> 00:28:21,068
I like it here.
It's nice.
600
00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:23,300
The sun is chirping.
The birds are shining.
601
00:28:23,334 --> 00:28:26,567
The water's wet.
Life is good, sweetheart.
602
00:28:26,601 --> 00:28:28,100
Life is good.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00