1 00:00:01,148 --> 00:00:03,369 Some kids dream of being astronauts. 2 00:00:03,379 --> 00:00:05,558 Some kids dream of playing baseball. 3 00:00:05,568 --> 00:00:08,099 When I was a kid, I had only one dream. 4 00:00:08,154 --> 00:00:09,688 To build a skyscraper. 5 00:00:09,838 --> 00:00:11,664 That's stupid. 6 00:00:13,131 --> 00:00:15,206 There were some obstacles along the way. 7 00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:17,605 But eventually my dream came true. 8 00:00:17,841 --> 00:00:20,226 I became an architect. 9 00:00:20,236 --> 00:00:21,604 Morning, everyone! 10 00:00:21,676 --> 00:00:26,480 So, I had an idea for the atrium. 11 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:27,908 Ready? 12 00:00:28,155 --> 00:00:29,962 Columns. 13 00:00:30,544 --> 00:00:32,332 That's stupid. 14 00:00:35,499 --> 00:00:39,692 Transcript : Raceman Subtitles : Willow's Team 15 00:00:39,776 --> 00:00:43,331 www.forom.com 16 00:00:53,188 --> 00:00:56,082 I... I can't believe you knocked over my model. 17 00:00:56,098 --> 00:01:00,141 Well, it's just... it's not exactly new, is it-- columns? 18 00:01:00,155 --> 00:01:03,383 I mean, what's your next groundbreaking idea-- ceilings? 19 00:01:03,588 --> 00:01:04,960 Floors? 20 00:01:04,975 --> 00:01:06,763 Windows? 21 00:01:06,807 --> 00:01:09,532 I know what you're thinking: Who's this jerk? 22 00:01:09,545 --> 00:01:12,083 Well, this jerk was Hammond Druthers, 23 00:01:12,095 --> 00:01:14,411 a legend in the architecture community. 24 00:01:14,428 --> 00:01:16,270 Very big in the '80s. 25 00:01:16,908 --> 00:01:20,011 He was also far and away the worst boss I ever had. 26 00:01:20,276 --> 00:01:23,542 Then I designed the Spokane National Bank Building. 27 00:01:23,556 --> 00:01:26,013 And suddenly... I was his boss. 28 00:01:26,058 --> 00:01:28,510 - And he didn't like it. - Stairs? 29 00:01:28,725 --> 00:01:31,813 And to be honest, I wasn't sure I liked it either. 30 00:01:31,828 --> 00:01:34,800 See, before, when I was just another employee, 31 00:01:34,818 --> 00:01:37,342 I was happy, carefree. 32 00:01:37,355 --> 00:01:40,180 The guy who hung out in the break room making fun of the boss. 33 00:01:40,196 --> 00:01:41,250 Did you see what he was wearing today? 34 00:01:41,287 --> 00:01:44,040 It was like his pants were being held up by his nipples. 35 00:01:46,366 --> 00:01:49,681 Yeah, and that shirt with the flowers, I get hay fever just looking at it. 36 00:01:52,086 --> 00:01:54,233 But suddenly I was a different guy. 37 00:01:55,507 --> 00:01:56,842 Hey, guys. 38 00:01:57,336 --> 00:01:58,783 What's so funny? 39 00:01:58,885 --> 00:01:59,981 Nothing. 40 00:02:00,125 --> 00:02:02,963 Um... nice shirt. 41 00:02:03,388 --> 00:02:04,672 Thanks. 42 00:02:04,685 --> 00:02:06,381 The hours were insane. 43 00:02:06,397 --> 00:02:09,563 I was always working even when I wasn't at work. 44 00:02:09,577 --> 00:02:12,963 Oh, Robin... I just had a great idea. 45 00:02:12,975 --> 00:02:16,702 Oh, do whatever you want to me just don't wake me up. 46 00:02:20,145 --> 00:02:22,343 Before, I used to be this guy. 47 00:02:22,357 --> 00:02:25,663 Dude, of course you should take the day off for the Foo Fighters concert. 48 00:02:25,678 --> 00:02:26,913 Just say you're sick. 49 00:02:26,925 --> 00:02:28,040 But now... 50 00:02:28,088 --> 00:02:29,390 I was this guy. 51 00:02:29,406 --> 00:02:30,780 Sick, huh? 52 00:02:32,276 --> 00:02:34,102 Unbutton your shirt. 53 00:02:35,598 --> 00:02:38,642 Hmm... "Foo Fighters." 54 00:02:39,757 --> 00:02:41,600 Get back to work. 55 00:02:42,017 --> 00:02:45,003 But still, the worst part was Druthers. 56 00:02:45,016 --> 00:02:47,222 - Well, I was thinking... - Ceilings? Oops. 57 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:51,973 Said that already. Then again, you seem to like rehashing old ideas. 58 00:02:51,988 --> 00:02:54,673 I'm kidding, of course. 59 00:02:54,735 --> 00:02:56,631 Another hole in one, boss. 60 00:02:57,775 --> 00:03:00,201 Oh, wow, he must be really good-looking. 61 00:03:00,215 --> 00:03:01,291 Why would you say that? 62 00:03:01,307 --> 00:03:04,261 Well, 'cause only good-looking people can get away with saying things like that. 63 00:03:04,295 --> 00:03:05,711 I have found that to be true. 64 00:03:05,728 --> 00:03:07,682 It's a blessing and a curse really. 65 00:03:08,238 --> 00:03:10,571 Ted, you can't let him treat you like that. 66 00:03:10,588 --> 00:03:12,833 Yeah, you gotta ask yourself, who's the boss? 67 00:03:12,846 --> 00:03:14,852 - Tony. - Angela. - Mona. 68 00:03:15,048 --> 00:03:16,111 Mona? 69 00:03:16,125 --> 00:03:18,631 Watch it more closely. Rock your world. 70 00:03:19,166 --> 00:03:20,661 So, what are you gonna do? 71 00:03:20,677 --> 00:03:23,983 Well... it's awkward, I mean, the guy used to be my boss. 72 00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:26,142 So, I went to talk to the managing partner. 73 00:03:26,158 --> 00:03:27,503 Fire him. 74 00:03:27,906 --> 00:03:30,972 Well, sir, I was thinking he could just be put on a different project. 75 00:03:30,986 --> 00:03:32,281 Fire him! 76 00:03:32,298 --> 00:03:35,960 He's an arrogant, washed-up, pain in the ass. 77 00:03:35,978 --> 00:03:38,791 In fact, fire everyone on that project. 78 00:03:38,806 --> 00:03:42,040 Druthers, Mosby, the whole lot of them. 79 00:03:42,057 --> 00:03:45,443 Mosby, sir? I, I... I hear Mosby's doing some great work. 80 00:03:45,455 --> 00:03:50,181 Fine, Mosby can stay. But tell him he's on thin ice. 81 00:03:52,086 --> 00:03:53,553 Come here. 82 00:03:55,516 --> 00:03:58,073 I like you, Crosby. 83 00:03:59,608 --> 00:04:01,050 You mind if I charge my phone? 84 00:04:01,065 --> 00:04:02,371 Knock yourself out. 85 00:04:02,625 --> 00:04:05,973 Well, Ted, if you do fire Druthers, the key is timing. 86 00:04:05,985 --> 00:04:08,392 Remember when I had to fire my makeup artist? 87 00:04:08,426 --> 00:04:12,320 Vicki, um... I'm so sorry about this, 88 00:04:12,335 --> 00:04:15,522 but there's been some budget cuts and, um, 89 00:04:15,535 --> 00:04:17,361 we have to let you go. 90 00:04:17,497 --> 00:04:19,581 I mean, after tonight. 91 00:04:19,606 --> 00:04:22,221 I still need my makeup for the broadcast. 92 00:04:22,836 --> 00:04:24,190 So... 93 00:04:25,937 --> 00:04:29,871 Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families of the victims. 94 00:04:29,918 --> 00:04:31,242 You know what? I'm gonna do it. 95 00:04:31,257 --> 00:04:33,200 I'm gonna fire Druthers tomorrow. 96 00:04:36,188 --> 00:04:38,980 - Oh, my God! - What? 97 00:04:38,998 --> 00:04:41,240 - Do you know about this? - No. 98 00:04:41,258 --> 00:04:42,332 What is that? 99 00:04:42,345 --> 00:04:44,923 Only the greatest thing ever. 100 00:04:44,937 --> 00:04:47,633 Wait, wait, wait-- that's not enough buildup. 101 00:04:47,935 --> 00:04:50,521 If they were to cure cancer tomorrow, 102 00:04:50,535 --> 00:04:53,193 this would still be the greatest thing to happen all week. 103 00:04:53,207 --> 00:04:57,520 Okay. Now you're ready for naked Marshall. 104 00:04:58,148 --> 00:04:59,811 Oh, my God. 105 00:05:00,215 --> 00:05:02,442 This is awesome times awesome. 106 00:05:02,455 --> 00:05:04,021 It's awesome squared. 107 00:05:04,036 --> 00:05:06,550 I know, right? Behind the piano this whole time. 108 00:05:06,566 --> 00:05:08,930 Wait. If Marshall went to all this trouble to hide it, 109 00:05:08,947 --> 00:05:11,011 he clearly doesn't want us to find it. 110 00:05:11,026 --> 00:05:12,560 Oh, come on, Robin. 111 00:05:12,576 --> 00:05:16,412 No, I'm saying that he must be really embarrassed by this. 112 00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:19,170 We are gonna have so much fun. 113 00:05:19,185 --> 00:05:21,090 I know! We're gonna have so much fun! 114 00:05:21,105 --> 00:05:23,513 Oh, sorry I'm late; lunch ran a little long. 115 00:05:23,528 --> 00:05:24,941 You wanted to see me, Mosby? 116 00:05:24,956 --> 00:05:27,370 Uh, yeah, like four hours ago. 117 00:05:27,765 --> 00:05:30,941 Well, excuse me, for spending the last four hours 118 00:05:30,955 --> 00:05:33,543 drawing designs for your building. 119 00:05:33,966 --> 00:05:36,163 This is a cocktail napkin. 120 00:05:36,537 --> 00:05:38,600 Covered in profanity. 121 00:05:39,795 --> 00:05:41,863 Look, Hammond, um, 122 00:05:41,876 --> 00:05:44,641 there's no easy way to say this, so... 123 00:05:45,196 --> 00:05:48,402 why don't we just, um, step into your office. 124 00:05:49,586 --> 00:05:53,800 # Happy birthday to you # 125 00:05:53,816 --> 00:05:57,682 - # Happy birthday to you # - Oh, you had me. You so had me. 126 00:05:57,697 --> 00:06:01,870 # Happy birthday, dear Hammond # 127 00:06:01,886 --> 00:06:05,192 # Happy birthday to you # 128 00:06:05,207 --> 00:06:07,521 So, you didn't fire him? 129 00:06:07,886 --> 00:06:10,670 I can't fire a guy on his birthday. Everyone would hate me. 130 00:06:10,686 --> 00:06:14,353 Besides, they put a party hat on me. My authority was compromised. 131 00:06:15,468 --> 00:06:18,383 Oh, hey, Marshall. Have a seat. 132 00:06:18,798 --> 00:06:21,820 I know how much you love stools. 133 00:06:22,198 --> 00:06:25,143 Thanks. Yeah, stools are better for your posture. 134 00:06:25,346 --> 00:06:29,782 And, uh... I... got you a rose. 135 00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:31,890 Thank you. That's so sweet. 136 00:06:31,907 --> 00:06:34,831 You guys are being... so sweet. 137 00:06:34,845 --> 00:06:38,173 Hey, guys. Guess what I got. A new dart. 138 00:06:38,188 --> 00:06:39,910 Oh, wow, a new dart. 139 00:06:39,926 --> 00:06:41,692 Hey, that new dart is great. 140 00:06:41,706 --> 00:06:44,012 I did not know you were such a fan of new dart, Barney. 141 00:06:44,106 --> 00:06:46,733 Oh, yes, Robin, I just love new dart. 142 00:06:46,746 --> 00:06:48,560 Nude art. 143 00:06:48,665 --> 00:06:50,530 - Nude art. - Nude art. 144 00:06:50,583 --> 00:06:53,798 Okay, all right, so what, you guys found the painting, huh? 145 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:56,212 I knew this day would come. 146 00:06:56,224 --> 00:06:57,452 How did you know that? 147 00:06:57,469 --> 00:06:59,451 Because I didn't hide it very well. 148 00:06:59,847 --> 00:07:02,321 So the story on the painting is that, back in college, 149 00:07:02,336 --> 00:07:05,243 Lily wanted to do a nude study for her art class. 150 00:07:05,256 --> 00:07:07,123 Marshall wasn't so into the idea. 151 00:07:07,138 --> 00:07:09,172 Well, I just... don't think that some dude 152 00:07:09,187 --> 00:07:11,851 should drop trou just to pose for you. 153 00:07:11,867 --> 00:07:16,273 It's for class, and it's just that weird kid Hunter from my freshman hall. 154 00:07:16,288 --> 00:07:18,062 The frisbee dude with the soul patch? 155 00:07:18,076 --> 00:07:19,752 He's like the hottest guy in school! 156 00:07:19,767 --> 00:07:21,103 No, he's actually a little husky... 157 00:07:21,136 --> 00:07:22,742 Oh, he's just huggable! 158 00:07:22,756 --> 00:07:24,351 And complicated... 159 00:07:24,367 --> 00:07:26,221 and a little bit of a jerk. 160 00:07:26,236 --> 00:07:28,902 Just enough so you think maybe you can change him. 161 00:07:28,917 --> 00:07:31,031 Okay, just forget it. 162 00:07:33,567 --> 00:07:35,100 Call me old-fashioned, 163 00:07:35,118 --> 00:07:38,890 I just think that I'm the only guy you should see naked. 164 00:07:39,327 --> 00:07:41,542 Well, then you'll have to do it. 165 00:07:41,558 --> 00:07:44,802 Are you kidding me? What if somebody sees it? 166 00:07:44,827 --> 00:07:47,161 We're not in high school anymore. 167 00:07:47,178 --> 00:07:50,842 People don't make fun of you for posing nude for a painting. 168 00:07:50,856 --> 00:07:52,612 We're adults now. 169 00:07:52,626 --> 00:07:54,631 We totally saw your butt. 170 00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:00,801 This painting has caused too much grief already. 171 00:08:00,815 --> 00:08:02,512 I'm destroying it right now. 172 00:08:03,366 --> 00:08:05,602 Oh, no, what's the matter, Marshall? 173 00:08:05,617 --> 00:08:06,731 Where is it? 174 00:08:06,915 --> 00:08:10,193 I'll tell you where it is if you'll answer these riddles three. 175 00:08:10,205 --> 00:08:11,972 You hung it up in the bar, didn't you? 176 00:08:11,985 --> 00:08:13,701 Yo, why you gotta ruin my riddles? 177 00:08:15,378 --> 00:08:16,801 Field trip! 178 00:08:20,745 --> 00:08:24,621 Oh, no. Someone put your painting up behind the bar. 179 00:08:24,635 --> 00:08:25,801 Classic! 180 00:08:25,817 --> 00:08:27,763 What a memorable prank. 181 00:08:29,418 --> 00:08:31,372 Hey, Marshall. What'll you have? 182 00:08:31,387 --> 00:08:34,361 What'll I have? Um, I don't know, maybe a beer 183 00:08:34,377 --> 00:08:37,411 and that nude painting of me hanging behind the bar! 184 00:08:37,427 --> 00:08:39,311 Ooh, I'm sorry, that painting's property of the bar. 185 00:08:39,347 --> 00:08:40,770 I know that Barney gave you that painting. 186 00:08:40,807 --> 00:08:42,111 I don't know what you're talking about. 187 00:08:42,145 --> 00:08:43,573 Whatever he's paying you, I'll pay you double. 188 00:08:43,608 --> 00:08:44,570 I doubt it. 189 00:08:44,587 --> 00:08:46,421 Whatever he's paying you, I'll give you that plus ten bucks. 190 00:08:46,457 --> 00:08:47,343 I doubt it. 191 00:08:47,355 --> 00:08:49,973 All right, you know what, Carl, you just lost yourself a regular customer. 192 00:08:50,008 --> 00:08:51,531 I doubt it. 193 00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:57,962 This painting is the worst thing that's ever happened to me. 194 00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:03,320 Okay, where should we put it up next? In his law school? 195 00:09:03,335 --> 00:09:04,990 Ooh on the side of a bus. Oh, oh! 196 00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:06,541 How much do billboards cost? 197 00:09:06,558 --> 00:09:09,070 Easy, Scherbatsky. Finesse. 198 00:09:09,085 --> 00:09:11,431 I've got a five-year rollout plan. 199 00:09:11,446 --> 00:09:14,042 I'll have you know that painting's got commitments all over the city. 200 00:09:14,078 --> 00:09:15,682 Then, after New York... 201 00:09:23,276 --> 00:09:25,222 One of my worst fears has come true-- 202 00:09:25,236 --> 00:09:27,460 I just saw Marshall grabbing himself naked. 203 00:09:28,388 --> 00:09:29,840 Well, I gotta go. 204 00:09:29,855 --> 00:09:31,830 Believe it or not, I have to go back to the office. 205 00:09:31,865 --> 00:09:33,293 Oh, I'll go out with you. 206 00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:34,402 Bye, guys. 207 00:09:35,406 --> 00:09:38,871 You know, I wish everyone didn't have to make fun of that painting. 208 00:09:38,887 --> 00:09:41,431 Eh, we're not making fun of the painting, we're just making fun of Marshall. 209 00:09:41,467 --> 00:09:43,570 The painting's actually really great. 210 00:09:43,587 --> 00:09:45,781 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 211 00:09:46,096 --> 00:09:47,740 Well, thank you. 212 00:09:47,757 --> 00:09:51,152 You know, seeing it again makes me miss painting nudes. 213 00:09:53,906 --> 00:09:55,152 What? 214 00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:57,051 Paint me. 215 00:09:57,757 --> 00:09:58,941 What? 216 00:10:00,426 --> 00:10:01,852 Paint me. 217 00:10:07,685 --> 00:10:08,961 Who's that? 218 00:10:09,167 --> 00:10:10,580 Who's out there? 219 00:10:10,835 --> 00:10:12,562 Hammond, is that you? 220 00:10:12,575 --> 00:10:13,901 Mosby? 221 00:10:14,847 --> 00:10:17,383 Druthers and I were alone in the office. 222 00:10:17,396 --> 00:10:18,740 If I was gonna fire him, 223 00:10:18,755 --> 00:10:20,741 this would be the best chance I'd ever have. 224 00:10:20,755 --> 00:10:22,651 Uh, look, just a second, Ted. 225 00:10:22,665 --> 00:10:24,760 Uh, no, I, I really need to talk to you. 226 00:10:24,778 --> 00:10:26,852 Look, there's no easy way to say... 227 00:10:26,865 --> 00:10:28,321 What, what are you doing? 228 00:10:29,116 --> 00:10:30,663 What are you doing? 229 00:10:30,675 --> 00:10:33,501 I'm standing here wearing pants. 230 00:10:34,236 --> 00:10:36,762 Are you sleeping here? What's going on? 231 00:10:36,777 --> 00:10:38,432 Okay, fine, yes. 232 00:10:38,446 --> 00:10:39,770 Not that it's any of your business 233 00:10:39,807 --> 00:10:42,611 but my wife had a little spat a few weeks ago, 234 00:10:42,626 --> 00:10:45,560 and I've been sleeping here until she cools off. 235 00:10:45,576 --> 00:10:48,411 Okay, well, uh, you're right-- that is none of my business. 236 00:10:48,427 --> 00:10:50,651 Uh, look, there's no easy way to say this-- I... 237 00:10:50,666 --> 00:10:52,040 Who am I kidding? 238 00:10:52,258 --> 00:10:55,200 She's never gonna take me back. 239 00:11:00,935 --> 00:11:02,313 It's okay. 240 00:11:08,096 --> 00:11:10,121 What did you want to say to me? 241 00:11:12,718 --> 00:11:14,421 Happy birthday, buddy. 242 00:11:24,636 --> 00:11:27,112 So, you've been living at the office? 243 00:11:27,246 --> 00:11:28,542 Yes. 244 00:11:28,837 --> 00:11:31,673 I'm an architect without a home. 245 00:11:31,987 --> 00:11:34,293 You see the tragic irony in that? 246 00:11:34,308 --> 00:11:35,991 - Yeah, I do. - 'Cause I design homes. 247 00:11:36,006 --> 00:11:37,242 - I see it. - But I don't have a home. 248 00:11:37,278 --> 00:11:38,630 Not lost on me at all. 249 00:11:39,687 --> 00:11:42,281 But I don't understand-- why don't you just go to a hotel? 250 00:11:42,297 --> 00:11:44,772 You could be sleeping on a mattress instead of... 251 00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:48,012 what appears to be torn-up drawings of my building. 252 00:11:48,027 --> 00:11:50,110 Why would I go to a hotel, when any second, 253 00:11:50,126 --> 00:11:52,562 she's going to call and tell me to come home. 254 00:11:54,318 --> 00:11:56,812 She's a very special lady, Ted. 255 00:11:56,906 --> 00:12:01,150 She's quite... mannish. 256 00:12:01,305 --> 00:12:03,652 She gives me what I need. 257 00:12:03,738 --> 00:12:05,431 Do you understand that? 258 00:12:05,887 --> 00:12:08,223 Uh, no, I don't. 259 00:12:08,625 --> 00:12:10,870 If you were lost in the wilderness, 260 00:12:11,076 --> 00:12:13,250 she can provide for me. 261 00:12:14,388 --> 00:12:16,330 Well, that's the dream. 262 00:12:17,997 --> 00:12:20,283 I'm glad you came here tonight, Ted. 263 00:12:20,295 --> 00:12:21,270 Me too, Hammond. 264 00:12:21,287 --> 00:12:22,331 - Call me Ham. - No, thanks. 265 00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:24,851 - Hammy D? - No, I think just Hammond. 266 00:12:24,967 --> 00:12:28,451 So, I'm guessing you didn't fire him. 267 00:12:30,725 --> 00:12:33,071 I was this close. 268 00:12:33,808 --> 00:12:36,120 Meanwhile, Lily had been up all night 269 00:12:36,135 --> 00:12:38,141 in the grips of a dilemma. 270 00:12:48,206 --> 00:12:50,723 - Oh honey, you're awake? - I'm awake. 271 00:12:51,595 --> 00:12:53,681 - Is everything okay? - Yeah. 272 00:12:53,697 --> 00:12:56,612 I've kind of been wrestling with something. 273 00:12:56,625 --> 00:12:59,801 What if I told you I had a way to pay for our honeymoon? 274 00:12:59,817 --> 00:13:01,653 Baby, our honeymoon's already paid for. 275 00:13:01,667 --> 00:13:03,501 We're going to Howe Caverns. 276 00:13:03,568 --> 00:13:08,771 Well yeah, but-- but what if we didn't want to spend our honeymoon in a cave? 277 00:13:09,136 --> 00:13:12,471 It's not just a cave, it's a whole labyrinth of caves. 278 00:13:12,486 --> 00:13:14,392 It's an underground adventure. 279 00:13:14,407 --> 00:13:17,522 There's a cave that's so dark that you don't even know you're in there. 280 00:13:17,536 --> 00:13:20,553 I mean, we're going to experience a whole new kind of dark. 281 00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:24,640 Well, what if I found a way to make a little extra money 282 00:13:24,658 --> 00:13:27,781 so that we spend our honeymoon not in Howe Caverns, 283 00:13:27,795 --> 00:13:30,221 but in Scotland? 284 00:13:30,238 --> 00:13:32,292 - Loch Ness? - Yeah. 285 00:13:32,305 --> 00:13:35,332 And you know, Edinburgh and the Highlands and Glasgow... 286 00:13:35,346 --> 00:13:38,230 Loch Ness. Nessy. 287 00:13:38,435 --> 00:13:42,772 Baby, I would love to search for the enchanted creature of the Emerald Loch, 288 00:13:42,785 --> 00:13:45,721 but... we can't afford that. 289 00:13:45,738 --> 00:13:47,670 Maybe we can. 290 00:13:47,707 --> 00:13:50,891 Paint me. 291 00:13:51,238 --> 00:13:53,090 Okay, I don't get this. 292 00:13:53,105 --> 00:13:55,142 You've been making fun of that painting all this time 293 00:13:55,177 --> 00:13:56,782 and now you want me to paint you? 294 00:13:56,796 --> 00:13:59,450 We knew we could torture Marshall because he has shame. 295 00:13:59,467 --> 00:14:00,622 I do not. 296 00:14:00,635 --> 00:14:03,391 In my body, where the shame gland should be, 297 00:14:03,405 --> 00:14:05,812 there's a second awesome gland. 298 00:14:05,828 --> 00:14:07,172 True story. 299 00:14:07,335 --> 00:14:10,161 Yeah, that's not the gland I'm worried about painting. 300 00:14:10,775 --> 00:14:11,791 Yeah. 301 00:14:11,838 --> 00:14:14,550 A nude Barney is a challenge. 302 00:14:14,725 --> 00:14:18,863 But I think you're talented enough to immortalize this. 303 00:14:19,566 --> 00:14:21,711 Now is the time-- I'm 31. 304 00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:24,601 I'm at the peak of my physical beauty. 305 00:14:24,616 --> 00:14:28,863 If I were a woman, I'd have passed it long, long ago. 306 00:14:29,288 --> 00:14:31,121 Long ago. 307 00:14:31,258 --> 00:14:32,492 Forget it. 308 00:14:32,506 --> 00:14:35,990 I promised Marshall he was the only guy I would ever see naked. 309 00:14:38,206 --> 00:14:40,870 I'll give you $5,000. 310 00:14:40,888 --> 00:14:42,410 We're going to Loch Ness! 311 00:14:42,426 --> 00:14:43,581 Yeah! 312 00:14:46,126 --> 00:14:48,330 That cabby would not shut up. 313 00:14:48,348 --> 00:14:50,310 Yeah, we should call him a gabby. 314 00:14:50,325 --> 00:14:52,653 I think it, you say it. 315 00:14:53,055 --> 00:14:57,002 Hey, uh... thanks for putting me up last night, buddy. 316 00:14:57,308 --> 00:14:58,672 Give 'em hell. 317 00:15:00,936 --> 00:15:02,303 Morning, team. 318 00:15:02,316 --> 00:15:05,030 So, I have given it some thought, 319 00:15:05,046 --> 00:15:09,143 and I say we revisit columns. 320 00:15:09,155 --> 00:15:11,792 Oh, God, not this again. 321 00:15:11,946 --> 00:15:15,510 Ted, a man in a toga just arrived and delivered a parchment. 322 00:15:15,528 --> 00:15:16,951 Let me read it: 323 00:15:17,645 --> 00:15:19,252 Oh! It's from ancient Greece. 324 00:15:19,265 --> 00:15:22,590 They want their basic architectural elements back. 325 00:15:22,607 --> 00:15:24,632 - Geez. - What? 326 00:15:24,657 --> 00:15:25,971 You didn't hear me? 327 00:15:25,987 --> 00:15:27,833 Toga, parchment... 328 00:15:28,045 --> 00:15:29,901 Can I see you for one second? 329 00:15:29,917 --> 00:15:32,591 Ooh, I'm in trouble now. 330 00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:37,031 What are you doing? 331 00:15:37,046 --> 00:15:38,592 I thought we were friends. 332 00:15:38,606 --> 00:15:40,681 You slept on my couch, you ate my cereal. 333 00:15:40,697 --> 00:15:43,073 I tossed you more toilet paper. 334 00:15:43,086 --> 00:15:44,353 We are friends. 335 00:15:44,367 --> 00:15:48,413 But that doesn't magically make your bad ideas good. 336 00:15:48,426 --> 00:15:50,212 What? I don't believe this! 337 00:15:50,225 --> 00:15:52,322 You're, you're, you're wearing my clothes! 338 00:15:52,337 --> 00:15:54,371 And my girlfriend's... sneakers-- 339 00:15:54,386 --> 00:15:56,580 man, you have weirdly small feet. 340 00:15:56,636 --> 00:16:00,420 Ted, I hope that you're not going to let our professional woes 341 00:16:00,436 --> 00:16:02,401 interfere with our friendship, 342 00:16:02,415 --> 00:16:05,721 because I really kind of need you right now. 343 00:16:08,145 --> 00:16:10,153 Okay, let's get this over with. 344 00:16:10,165 --> 00:16:13,100 Hey, hey! I don't want you phoning this in. 345 00:16:13,115 --> 00:16:16,131 This painting could, someday, become a serious work of art. 346 00:16:16,148 --> 00:16:18,790 I mean, you have been blessed with an amazing gift. 347 00:16:18,908 --> 00:16:20,203 Thank you. 348 00:16:20,218 --> 00:16:21,782 I meant me. 349 00:16:22,547 --> 00:16:25,671 Now, I like how you captured Marshall's essence. 350 00:16:25,688 --> 00:16:28,013 Goofy and unburdened, with wit. 351 00:16:28,025 --> 00:16:30,712 But me, I want something more regal. 352 00:16:30,728 --> 00:16:32,890 Something my progeny could look at and say, 353 00:16:32,907 --> 00:16:35,651 "There's stands Barnabus Stinson." 354 00:16:35,666 --> 00:16:37,371 He was wise... 355 00:16:37,727 --> 00:16:39,561 and strong. 356 00:16:41,315 --> 00:16:43,943 I don't think your sword will fit. 357 00:16:43,956 --> 00:16:45,640 I get that a lot. 358 00:16:46,606 --> 00:16:48,953 And so, as Lily began painting, 359 00:16:48,965 --> 00:16:50,883 Marshall thought about the $5,000 360 00:16:50,896 --> 00:16:53,382 and what his fiancée was doing to earn it. 361 00:16:53,395 --> 00:16:55,092 This isn't right. 362 00:16:56,005 --> 00:16:58,040 This isn't right at all. 363 00:16:58,057 --> 00:17:00,562 Finally, he could take it no more. 364 00:17:03,906 --> 00:17:05,082 Hold still. 365 00:17:06,846 --> 00:17:08,441 Hold still. 366 00:17:10,716 --> 00:17:13,680 - Hold still! - Paint faster! 367 00:17:15,516 --> 00:17:18,643 Okay, I guess it's time. 368 00:17:19,188 --> 00:17:21,110 Drop your shorts. 369 00:17:21,406 --> 00:17:22,871 Yeah. 370 00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:25,120 Wait, wait! 371 00:17:25,136 --> 00:17:27,780 That wasn't enough buildup. I need... 372 00:17:28,178 --> 00:17:31,011 In a world without justice, one man-- 373 00:17:31,028 --> 00:17:33,191 - Oh, just drop them! - All right. 374 00:17:35,767 --> 00:17:38,772 - No! No, this is not right! - We had a deal! 375 00:17:38,785 --> 00:17:40,702 Well, I'm going back on the deal. Barney, get out! 376 00:17:40,735 --> 00:17:42,452 - You...! - It's over! 377 00:17:45,548 --> 00:17:48,631 Lily, I can't let you go through with this! 378 00:17:48,648 --> 00:17:52,093 I found a castle we can stay in, but it's an extra two grand. 379 00:17:52,107 --> 00:17:53,903 It's just not right! 380 00:17:53,918 --> 00:17:56,571 It's beautiful and they say it's haunted. 381 00:17:56,587 --> 00:18:00,292 I can't let the woman I love compromise her values for money! 382 00:18:00,306 --> 00:18:03,260 I totally think we can get some more money out of him. 383 00:18:03,275 --> 00:18:05,952 I'm never letting my fiancée, ever...! 384 00:18:05,967 --> 00:18:07,471 Oh, you're still here? 385 00:18:07,487 --> 00:18:08,691 Before you say anything, 386 00:18:08,706 --> 00:18:10,231 I'll give you an extra five grand. 387 00:18:10,247 --> 00:18:11,520 We accept. 388 00:18:12,426 --> 00:18:15,412 You people are so easy to control. 389 00:18:15,945 --> 00:18:18,682 Dance for me, puppets, dance. 390 00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:22,672 And that's how Uncle Barney paid for Lily and Marshall's honeymoon. 391 00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,272 Come on, Ted, listen, why don't we get back 392 00:18:26,285 --> 00:18:28,022 and finish drawing the plans for a building 393 00:18:28,035 --> 00:18:30,401 which, in my opinion, is never going to get built, 394 00:18:30,418 --> 00:18:33,152 so you and I can get out of here and grab a couple of beers. 395 00:18:33,168 --> 00:18:34,152 No. 396 00:18:34,165 --> 00:18:37,611 Look, Hammond, there's no easy way to say this but... 397 00:18:37,626 --> 00:18:38,740 Looking for Hammond Druthers. 398 00:18:38,778 --> 00:18:40,592 Oh, that's me. I'm Hammond Druthers. 399 00:18:42,485 --> 00:18:44,342 These are divorce papers. 400 00:18:44,455 --> 00:18:45,952 You've been served. 401 00:18:45,975 --> 00:18:47,593 Oh, God. 402 00:18:48,035 --> 00:18:50,481 She's really going through with this. 403 00:18:50,525 --> 00:18:53,742 So that's it. It's over. 404 00:18:53,865 --> 00:18:56,113 There is no easy way to say this, but... 405 00:18:56,128 --> 00:18:59,291 She's giving me the remains of Wolfie? 406 00:18:59,876 --> 00:19:01,731 My dog is dead? 407 00:19:01,956 --> 00:19:04,452 Oh, my God. I can't believe this. 408 00:19:04,608 --> 00:19:07,710 She always played too rough with him. 409 00:19:08,598 --> 00:19:11,370 Believe me, there is no easy way to say this-- 410 00:19:11,387 --> 00:19:15,712 - # Happy birthday to you... # - You've got to be kidding me! 411 00:19:15,728 --> 00:19:18,552 Guys, you have no idea how much this means to me right now. 412 00:19:18,568 --> 00:19:20,120 Wait, his birthday was yesterday! 413 00:19:20,135 --> 00:19:22,372 Yeah, but a bunch of us were up at the conference in Montreal, 414 00:19:22,405 --> 00:19:25,601 - so we thought... - No! No birthday! No! 415 00:19:25,617 --> 00:19:28,211 I got something to say and I'm gonna get it out. 416 00:19:28,228 --> 00:19:31,242 Hammond, listen to me. I am sorry that your dog died, 417 00:19:31,257 --> 00:19:33,770 and that your wife is divorcing you and that... 418 00:19:33,788 --> 00:19:36,261 your life is falling apart and that these guys missed your birthday. 419 00:19:36,295 --> 00:19:38,163 And there is no easy way to say... 420 00:19:38,175 --> 00:19:39,932 What are you doing? What's going on? 421 00:19:39,945 --> 00:19:41,432 Oh, God... 422 00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:44,262 Oh, come on, you're not going to pull that, are you? 423 00:19:44,286 --> 00:19:49,293 Oh! Look, yeah, right. Now we're falling onto the ground. 424 00:19:49,305 --> 00:19:52,370 Well, nice try, but guess what? 425 00:19:52,616 --> 00:19:54,180 You're fired! 426 00:19:54,198 --> 00:19:57,362 You're fired-- you get it? You hear me? 427 00:19:57,375 --> 00:20:00,133 You're gone! You're fired! 428 00:20:15,828 --> 00:20:19,420 In my defense, I think we all suspected Hammond 429 00:20:19,436 --> 00:20:21,192 might have been faking. 430 00:20:22,628 --> 00:20:26,753 On the plus side, the EMTs seem to think he's going to be just fine 431 00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:31,230 and, as you saw, they did admit that I did not cause the heart attack, 432 00:20:31,246 --> 00:20:33,790 even if they said it a bit begrudgingly. 433 00:20:34,735 --> 00:20:37,890 And there it was, rock bottom: 434 00:20:37,905 --> 00:20:39,703 They all hated me. 435 00:20:39,735 --> 00:20:41,781 But just when all seemed lost, 436 00:20:41,798 --> 00:20:45,031 I had the greatest idea of my entire career. 437 00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:51,730 Margarita Fridays-- great idea, boss. 438 00:21:03,645 --> 00:21:05,672 Okay, it's done. 439 00:21:06,125 --> 00:21:09,032 I'm gonna step out, so you can admire it. 440 00:21:09,047 --> 00:21:10,842 Thank you very much, Lily. 441 00:21:14,257 --> 00:21:15,852 Marshall, do you have the money? 442 00:21:15,867 --> 00:21:17,920 - Yeah. - Let's get out of here! 443 00:21:17,966 --> 00:21:21,400 A smooth area?! You gave me the Ken doll?! 444 00:21:25,226 --> 00:21:27,533 She left out Little Barney. 445 00:21:28,376 --> 00:21:30,503 Barnacle Junior. 446 00:21:31,085 --> 00:21:33,490 My Barnana is... 447 00:21:35,158 --> 00:21:37,320 Barnito Supreme. 0 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net