1 00:00:01,155 --> 00:00:03,102 NARRATOR: Kids, up to this point in the story, 2 00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:04,949 we had found doppelgangers.-- 3 00:00:04,993 --> 00:00:06,562 Eerie but awesome look-alikes 4 00:00:06,608 --> 00:00:08,555 for four of the five members of our little group. 5 00:00:09,052 --> 00:00:10,464 There was Lesbian Robin... 6 00:00:10,584 --> 00:00:11,458 (spits) 7 00:00:13,079 --> 00:00:14,581 Mustache Marshall... 8 00:00:15,430 --> 00:00:17,478 Stripper Lily... 9 00:00:18,656 --> 00:00:20,253 and Mexican Wrestler Me. 10 00:00:20,698 --> 00:00:21,969 Yes, mine was the coolest. 11 00:00:21,970 --> 00:00:23,103 (cheering) 12 00:00:23,104 --> 00:00:24,405 And so we were all eager 13 00:00:24,406 --> 00:00:26,507 to find The Fifth Doppelganger: Barney's. 14 00:00:26,508 --> 00:00:28,042 Turned out, it was more important 15 00:00:28,043 --> 00:00:29,476 to some of us than others. 16 00:00:29,477 --> 00:00:31,578 We agree there's no sense in having a baby 17 00:00:31,579 --> 00:00:33,914 until we've seen all five doppelgangers, right? 18 00:00:33,915 --> 00:00:35,883 Yeah, of course. Stands to reason. 19 00:00:35,884 --> 00:00:38,519 Okay, so, when we finally see Barney's doppelganger, 20 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,321 that's the universe telling us it's go time. 21 00:00:41,322 --> 00:00:42,623 And that's when we'll start trying. 22 00:00:42,624 --> 00:00:43,624 Deal? 23 00:00:43,625 --> 00:00:45,259 Deal. 24 00:00:45,260 --> 00:00:47,728 And then one day, a few weeks later... 25 00:00:47,729 --> 00:00:48,829 Baby, were we serious about 26 00:00:48,830 --> 00:00:50,130 the whole Fifth Doppelganger thing? 27 00:00:50,131 --> 00:00:52,066 I mean, having a baby is a pretty big thing 28 00:00:52,067 --> 00:00:53,133 to leave up to the universe. 29 00:00:53,134 --> 00:00:54,702 Yeah, I know it's crazy. 30 00:00:54,703 --> 00:00:57,671 It's just so much easier to let the universe decide. 31 00:00:58,773 --> 00:01:00,207 Why do you ask? 32 00:01:00,208 --> 00:01:01,341 Boom! 33 00:01:01,342 --> 00:01:02,843 Universed! 34 00:01:02,844 --> 00:01:03,811 Oh, my God! 35 00:01:03,812 --> 00:01:05,079 Wait, wait, wait, hold on. 36 00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:07,047 That could easily be Barney 37 00:01:07,048 --> 00:01:08,415 pulling some scam to meet chicks. 38 00:01:08,416 --> 00:01:10,217 I'm one step ahead of you. 39 00:01:10,218 --> 00:01:11,452 Go for Barney. 40 00:01:11,453 --> 00:01:12,753 Barney, hey. It's Marshall. 41 00:01:12,754 --> 00:01:14,254 So you are at work? 42 00:01:14,255 --> 00:01:15,556 You're not-- I don't know-- 43 00:01:15,557 --> 00:01:17,458 driving a cab, wearing a wig. 44 00:01:17,459 --> 00:01:19,693 Yes, I'm at work. 45 00:01:19,694 --> 00:01:21,695 That's the sound of my stapler. 46 00:01:21,696 --> 00:01:23,130 That's the sound of my three-hole punch. 47 00:01:23,131 --> 00:01:24,865 And this is the sound of me filing 48 00:01:24,866 --> 00:01:27,167 my corporate guidelines on sexual harassment. 49 00:01:27,168 --> 00:01:28,168 (shredder buzzes) 50 00:01:28,169 --> 00:01:29,703 What is up?! 51 00:01:29,704 --> 00:01:31,538 Got to go, Big Chief. 52 00:01:35,210 --> 00:01:37,678 Barney's at work. 53 00:01:37,679 --> 00:01:40,714 That-that was The Fifth Doppelganger. 54 00:01:41,583 --> 00:01:44,752 Marshall Eriksen... 55 00:01:44,753 --> 00:01:46,720 put a baby in my belly. 56 00:01:48,656 --> 00:01:58,059 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 57 00:02:01,669 --> 00:02:03,337 I can't wait to tell the gang. 58 00:02:03,338 --> 00:02:05,973 This is one of those moments you dream about. 59 00:02:05,974 --> 00:02:07,908 "Guys... 60 00:02:07,909 --> 00:02:09,676 "Lily and I... 61 00:02:09,677 --> 00:02:11,211 are having unprotected sex." 62 00:02:11,212 --> 00:02:12,846 Ooh, I just got the chills. 63 00:02:12,847 --> 00:02:14,381 We're not gonna say anything. 64 00:02:14,382 --> 00:02:15,382 What? Why? 65 00:02:15,383 --> 00:02:16,817 Marshall, if we tell them, 66 00:02:16,818 --> 00:02:18,685 we're basically inviting them into 67 00:02:18,686 --> 00:02:21,722 the most private, intimate moment of our lives. 68 00:02:26,294 --> 00:02:27,728 You guys banging? (Marshall and Lily scream) 69 00:02:27,729 --> 00:02:30,330 Keep going; I'm not even here. 70 00:02:30,331 --> 00:02:31,698 But just for the record, 71 00:02:31,699 --> 00:02:33,567 having a baby: huge mistake. 72 00:02:33,568 --> 00:02:35,035 Now, show me what you got. 73 00:02:35,036 --> 00:02:37,004 Uncle Teddy's here! (Marshall and Lily scream) 74 00:02:37,005 --> 00:02:38,639 Quick question: How you guys gonna handle 75 00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:39,673 the whole Santa thing? 76 00:02:39,674 --> 00:02:41,175 I'm thinking, just be honest. 77 00:02:41,176 --> 00:02:43,510 (chuckles): Ah, hell. I'll dress up. 78 00:02:43,511 --> 00:02:45,679 This just in... (Marshall and Lily scream) 79 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,115 is what Marshall Eriksen is about to say to his wife 80 00:02:48,116 --> 00:02:50,184 as he attempts to impregnate her. 81 00:02:50,185 --> 00:02:54,621 Chopper 12 is live on the scene with "Baby Watch: 2010." 82 00:02:54,622 --> 00:02:57,324 (helicopter hovering) 83 00:02:57,325 --> 00:03:00,060 (wind blustering) 84 00:03:01,329 --> 00:03:03,964 Okay, fine. I won't tell anybody about the baby thing. 85 00:03:04,499 --> 00:03:05,465 Hey, guys. 86 00:03:05,466 --> 00:03:06,767 Hey. Guys... 87 00:03:06,768 --> 00:03:08,702 We saw The Fifth Doppelganger! 88 00:03:08,703 --> 00:03:09,703 (gasps) Whoa! 89 00:03:09,704 --> 00:03:11,104 Amazing! That is awesome! 90 00:03:11,105 --> 00:03:12,639 Mm-hmm. Ooh, freaky. 91 00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:13,640 A brunette Barney. 92 00:03:13,641 --> 00:03:14,641 I know. 93 00:03:14,642 --> 00:03:16,076 Say what you will about the guy, 94 00:03:16,077 --> 00:03:17,444 but Barney seems right as a blond. 95 00:03:17,445 --> 00:03:18,645 Well, that's true. Not every dude 96 00:03:18,646 --> 00:03:20,113 can pull that off the blond look. 97 00:03:20,114 --> 00:03:22,316 I don't know about that. 98 00:03:22,317 --> 00:03:23,350 What? 99 00:03:23,351 --> 00:03:25,519 Oh, that summer I was lifeguarding 100 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,688 at the Chagrin Falls Country Club, 101 00:03:27,689 --> 00:03:30,257 I was lathering a little lemon juice into the old mop, 102 00:03:30,258 --> 00:03:32,159 playing with some natural highlights. 103 00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:33,760 Let's just say there were a few 104 00:03:33,761 --> 00:03:37,531 senior citizens who pretended to drown on my watch. 105 00:03:38,499 --> 00:03:39,533 And sadly, one who did. 106 00:03:39,534 --> 00:03:40,734 Anyway, 107 00:03:40,735 --> 00:03:42,603 I'd look good blond. 108 00:03:42,604 --> 00:03:45,005 MARSHALL: Okay, people, we're in a delicate 109 00:03:45,006 --> 00:03:47,908 but very, very promising situation here. 110 00:03:47,909 --> 00:03:50,510 LILY: If we play the next 30 seconds right, 111 00:03:50,511 --> 00:03:52,179 Ted will dye his hair blond. 112 00:03:52,180 --> 00:03:53,347 ROBIN: Guys, this is mean. 113 00:03:53,348 --> 00:03:54,915 We can't-- uhp, just pictured it. 114 00:03:54,916 --> 00:03:56,149 How do we do this? 115 00:03:56,150 --> 00:03:57,784 TED: What are we all thinking about? 116 00:03:57,785 --> 00:03:58,852 Nachos? 117 00:03:58,853 --> 00:04:00,087 MARSHALL: Ted Mosby responds to 118 00:04:00,088 --> 00:04:01,488 one thing above all else. 119 00:04:01,489 --> 00:04:02,723 TED: I don't know, I'm still 120 00:04:02,724 --> 00:04:04,091 kind of full from lunch. 121 00:04:04,092 --> 00:04:05,259 MARSHALL: A bunch of people emphatically 122 00:04:05,260 --> 00:04:07,160 telling him not to do something. 123 00:04:07,161 --> 00:04:08,962 Follow my lead. 124 00:04:08,963 --> 00:04:10,964 TED: Ah, screw it, I could eat. 125 00:04:10,965 --> 00:04:12,733 Yes, we'd all like 126 00:04:12,734 --> 00:04:14,735 some nachos. 127 00:04:16,504 --> 00:04:19,740 I love you, buddy, but there's absolutely no way 128 00:04:19,741 --> 00:04:21,508 that you could pull off blond. 129 00:04:21,509 --> 00:04:23,210 It-it just wouldn't look right. 130 00:04:23,211 --> 00:04:26,313 Yeah, seriously, Ted, don't go blond. 131 00:04:26,314 --> 00:04:28,081 (bangs table) I'm going blond! 132 00:04:28,082 --> 00:04:29,149 No! No! 133 00:04:29,150 --> 00:04:30,317 That is not the outcome 134 00:04:30,318 --> 00:04:31,985 we were hoping for! 135 00:04:32,820 --> 00:04:34,288 NARRATOR: Now, kids, Robin and Don 136 00:04:34,289 --> 00:04:36,456 were becoming such a great team, both off 137 00:04:36,457 --> 00:04:39,192 and on the air, that local Channel 12 started asking them 138 00:04:39,193 --> 00:04:42,329 to guest-host some of their other top-notch programs. 139 00:04:49,270 --> 00:04:53,173 So, that's why Monty and I vow never to do drugs. 140 00:04:53,174 --> 00:04:55,242 Because drugs are bad. 141 00:04:55,243 --> 00:04:57,144 Right, Monty? 142 00:04:57,145 --> 00:04:58,545 We, sure, 143 00:04:58,546 --> 00:05:00,547 man-made chemical stuff. 144 00:05:00,548 --> 00:05:03,483 But things that grow in nature-- 145 00:05:03,484 --> 00:05:06,853 they're okay to try, like, once or twice. 146 00:05:06,854 --> 00:05:10,190 Not looking for gray areas here, Monty. 147 00:05:10,191 --> 00:05:13,727 I don't think it's right to lie to the kids, Moo-Moo. 148 00:05:13,728 --> 00:05:16,964 So... what are you saying? 149 00:05:16,965 --> 00:05:19,666 I've experimented with drugs. 150 00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:20,634 (gasps) 151 00:05:20,635 --> 00:05:22,736 NARRATOR: Fun fact: highest-rated 152 00:05:22,737 --> 00:05:24,404 Monty and Moo-Moo episode ever. 153 00:05:24,405 --> 00:05:25,439 Mmm. 154 00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:28,241 Hmm, what was that for? 155 00:05:28,242 --> 00:05:30,610 Before I met you, I'd given up on everything. 156 00:05:31,479 --> 00:05:34,081 Relationships, career, pants. 157 00:05:34,082 --> 00:05:35,282 (both chuckle) 158 00:05:36,918 --> 00:05:38,785 But you made me want to try again. 159 00:05:39,821 --> 00:05:41,088 I love you for that. 160 00:05:41,089 --> 00:05:43,623 Oh. Huh? 161 00:05:43,624 --> 00:05:44,658 Ooh. (chuckles) 162 00:05:44,659 --> 00:05:45,659 Oh, I see. 163 00:05:45,660 --> 00:05:47,794 Mmm. (chuckles) 164 00:05:51,866 --> 00:05:53,767 Hi. Hey, hi. 165 00:05:53,768 --> 00:05:54,935 Sorry. 166 00:05:54,936 --> 00:05:56,236 Um, you don't know me, 167 00:05:56,237 --> 00:05:57,971 but I just wanted to say thank you. 168 00:05:57,972 --> 00:06:00,741 You're actually a very important person in my life. 169 00:06:00,742 --> 00:06:02,009 Important? 170 00:06:02,010 --> 00:06:03,610 More like legendary. 171 00:06:03,611 --> 00:06:05,479 Marshall, it's me! 172 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:06,747 Barney! 173 00:06:06,748 --> 00:06:09,016 NARRATOR: Oddly enough, this would rank as only 174 00:06:09,017 --> 00:06:10,984 the second biggest surprise of the day. 175 00:06:10,985 --> 00:06:13,186 Wow, this is just very sudden. 176 00:06:13,187 --> 00:06:16,690 Sure, I can get you an answer by tomorrow. 177 00:06:16,691 --> 00:06:17,724 Okay. 178 00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:20,227 Thanks. 179 00:06:20,228 --> 00:06:22,029 (sighs softly) 180 00:06:23,765 --> 00:06:25,265 Ted, something big has just happened, 181 00:06:25,266 --> 00:06:27,067 and you're the most sensible person I know. 182 00:06:27,068 --> 00:06:28,769 I need to talk to you right now. 183 00:06:28,770 --> 00:06:31,104 You know what, it can wait. 184 00:06:31,105 --> 00:06:33,273 No, go ahead. I'm listening. 185 00:06:33,274 --> 00:06:34,975 Okay, well, 186 00:06:34,976 --> 00:06:36,943 the executive producer from WNKW 187 00:06:36,944 --> 00:06:38,345 happened to see our show the other morning 188 00:06:38,346 --> 00:06:40,247 and loved me. 189 00:06:40,248 --> 00:06:42,949 They offered me the lead anchor job, starting next week. 190 00:06:42,950 --> 00:06:45,018 Wow, that's great! 191 00:06:45,019 --> 00:06:46,019 It is great. 192 00:06:46,020 --> 00:06:47,287 But, um, here's the catch. 193 00:06:47,288 --> 00:06:48,321 WNKW is in... 194 00:06:48,322 --> 00:06:49,322 (dryer whirring) 195 00:06:49,323 --> 00:06:51,625 H-Helen, kill the dryer! 196 00:06:52,660 --> 00:06:54,127 (dryer stops) 197 00:06:54,128 --> 00:06:55,962 Is in Chicago. 198 00:06:59,981 --> 00:07:01,215 But you were The Fifth Doppelganger. 199 00:07:01,516 --> 00:07:03,250 How-how can you be you? 200 00:07:03,251 --> 00:07:05,486 I called you, Barney; We had a whole conversation! 201 00:07:05,487 --> 00:07:07,588 Ah, yes, I know what happened. 202 00:07:07,589 --> 00:07:09,256 See, people at work have 203 00:07:09,257 --> 00:07:12,993 this very strange expectation that I, well, work. 204 00:07:12,994 --> 00:07:14,161 (scoffs) 205 00:07:14,162 --> 00:07:15,929 I know, I know. 206 00:07:15,930 --> 00:07:18,465 So to make my colleagues think I'm busting my hump 207 00:07:18,466 --> 00:07:21,201 when I'm really out humping busty chicks, 208 00:07:21,202 --> 00:07:23,136 I decided to record a special message. 209 00:07:23,137 --> 00:07:25,038 What is up?! 210 00:07:25,039 --> 00:07:26,773 Got to go, Big Chief. 211 00:07:26,774 --> 00:07:28,475 How can it be a recording? 212 00:07:28,476 --> 00:07:32,079 You called me Big Chief, my special workplace nickname. 213 00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:34,815 Oh, buddy. 214 00:07:34,816 --> 00:07:36,750 (exhales forcefully) 215 00:07:36,751 --> 00:07:38,452 Hey, hey. 216 00:07:38,453 --> 00:07:40,387 Come on, Big Chief. 217 00:07:40,388 --> 00:07:41,788 Don't. 218 00:07:41,789 --> 00:07:44,691 Just don't. 219 00:07:44,692 --> 00:07:46,460 Why does this have to happen now? 220 00:07:46,461 --> 00:07:49,396 I mean, just when things are going so great with Don. 221 00:07:49,397 --> 00:07:51,298 (sighs) It's the never-ending battle 222 00:07:51,299 --> 00:07:53,700 of my life: Career versus romance. 223 00:07:53,701 --> 00:07:56,603 (laughs): "Never-ending battle"? 224 00:07:56,604 --> 00:07:58,972 Career has been trouncing romance for years. 225 00:07:58,973 --> 00:08:00,040 It's like the Globetrotters 226 00:08:00,041 --> 00:08:01,675 versus the Generals. 227 00:08:01,676 --> 00:08:03,510 Career's sinking hook shots from half court, 228 00:08:03,511 --> 00:08:05,412 Romance is just a bunch of slow white guys 229 00:08:05,413 --> 00:08:07,247 who couldn't make it in the Italian league. 230 00:08:07,248 --> 00:08:08,248 (sighs) 231 00:08:08,249 --> 00:08:10,684 Ted, I'm lost. 232 00:08:11,386 --> 00:08:12,586 What should I do? 233 00:08:12,587 --> 00:08:15,789 Okay, you seriously need to talk to Don about this. 234 00:08:15,790 --> 00:08:18,525 I'm just too confused to put this on Don. 235 00:08:18,526 --> 00:08:21,828 I need to leave him out of it until I figure out what I want. 236 00:08:21,829 --> 00:08:23,664 That makes sense. Yeah. 237 00:08:23,665 --> 00:08:25,899 And I'm sorry I can't give you better advice on this. 238 00:08:25,900 --> 00:08:28,135 The truth is, it's impossible for me 239 00:08:28,136 --> 00:08:30,470 to be objective about you moving away. 240 00:08:33,141 --> 00:08:35,576 Mm. Did you get a manicure? 241 00:08:35,577 --> 00:08:37,177 No, I didn't get a... 242 00:08:37,178 --> 00:08:38,412 He sure did. 243 00:08:38,413 --> 00:08:40,480 Flo! 244 00:08:40,481 --> 00:08:42,649 Why are you brunette and driving a cab? 245 00:08:42,650 --> 00:08:43,750 Oh, that. 246 00:08:43,751 --> 00:08:45,686 You know how it's my dream to have sex 247 00:08:45,687 --> 00:08:48,088 with at least one woman from every country on the planet? 248 00:08:48,089 --> 00:08:49,289 Sure. 249 00:08:51,259 --> 00:08:52,993 Wow. 250 00:08:52,994 --> 00:08:54,061 You're doing surprisingly well 251 00:08:54,062 --> 00:08:55,228 in the Baltics. Mm-hmm. 252 00:08:55,229 --> 00:08:56,363 So, I figure, 253 00:08:56,364 --> 00:08:57,397 what's the quickest way 254 00:08:57,398 --> 00:08:59,499 to get around the world in 180 lays? 255 00:08:59,500 --> 00:09:01,868 Lease a cab and wait outside the U.N. building 256 00:09:01,869 --> 00:09:02,970 for hot foreign chicks. 257 00:09:02,971 --> 00:09:04,771 It was the perfect plan. 258 00:09:04,772 --> 00:09:08,575 There was only one small detail I didn't take into account. 259 00:09:08,576 --> 00:09:09,710 Chicks don't want to bang cab drivers. 260 00:09:09,711 --> 00:09:11,979 Chicks do not want to bang cab drivers! 261 00:09:11,980 --> 00:09:14,381 And I put a lot of work into this one. 262 00:09:14,382 --> 00:09:16,917 I can't believe this. 263 00:09:16,918 --> 00:09:19,720 Now I got to tell Lily The Fifth Doppelganger is a fake. 264 00:09:19,721 --> 00:09:21,154 So? What does she care? 265 00:09:21,155 --> 00:09:25,192 Lily decided that once we spotted your doppelganger, 266 00:09:25,193 --> 00:09:26,793 we'd start trying to have kids. 267 00:09:26,794 --> 00:09:28,261 Kids?! No! 268 00:09:28,262 --> 00:09:29,463 Uh-uh! 269 00:09:29,464 --> 00:09:32,232 The rule is: no kids until you're at least 45! 270 00:09:32,233 --> 00:09:34,534 Do you ever read my blog?! 271 00:09:34,535 --> 00:09:37,237 It's gotten a lot better. 272 00:09:37,238 --> 00:09:39,940 I'm ready to be a dad, you know? 273 00:09:39,941 --> 00:09:44,311 But Lily needs some sign from the universe. 274 00:09:44,312 --> 00:09:46,213 And now it could be years. 275 00:09:46,214 --> 00:09:48,749 I'm sorry, buddy. 276 00:09:50,051 --> 00:09:51,718 That'll be $37.50. 277 00:09:51,719 --> 00:09:53,020 NARRATOR: So that night, 278 00:09:53,021 --> 00:09:56,123 Marshall went home to break the bad news to Lily. 279 00:09:56,124 --> 00:09:58,125 The universe has spoken. 280 00:09:58,126 --> 00:10:01,762 Marshall Eriksen, let's make a baby. 281 00:10:02,597 --> 00:10:04,297 I... 282 00:10:05,566 --> 00:10:07,434 Okay. 283 00:10:07,435 --> 00:10:08,969 (both moaning) 284 00:10:10,471 --> 00:10:11,805 Hey. Hey. 285 00:10:11,806 --> 00:10:16,076 (laughing hysterically) 286 00:10:18,012 --> 00:10:20,280 Hang on, hang on, hang on. 287 00:10:20,281 --> 00:10:22,282 I heard you were doing this, so I worked on some stuff. 288 00:10:22,283 --> 00:10:24,251 Uh, hey, uh, I'm planning a "White Wedding." 289 00:10:24,252 --> 00:10:26,620 Tell me, Billy Idol, is it a nice day for that? 290 00:10:26,621 --> 00:10:27,621 (chuckles) 291 00:10:27,622 --> 00:10:29,222 Some other Billy Idol ones. 292 00:10:29,223 --> 00:10:30,457 Um, if anyone's looking for 293 00:10:30,458 --> 00:10:32,459 the real Slim Shady, he's right here. 294 00:10:33,261 --> 00:10:34,428 That one's only okay. 295 00:10:34,429 --> 00:10:36,530 Robin, why aren't you getting in on this? 296 00:10:36,531 --> 00:10:39,266 Okay, first of all, I'm getting tons of compliments. 297 00:10:39,967 --> 00:10:41,868 Second of all, tell him. 298 00:10:41,869 --> 00:10:43,270 He's not getting tons of compliments. 299 00:10:43,271 --> 00:10:44,471 No, the other thing. 300 00:10:44,472 --> 00:10:45,639 ROBIN: Oh. 301 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:49,142 I might move to Chicago next week. 302 00:10:51,312 --> 00:10:53,313 Mm, um, hey, baby. 303 00:10:53,314 --> 00:10:54,214 Hmm? 304 00:10:54,215 --> 00:10:56,550 Not for nothing or nothing, 305 00:10:56,551 --> 00:10:58,685 but we'd still be doing this 306 00:10:58,686 --> 00:11:00,887 even if we hadn't seen Doppelganger Barney, right? 307 00:11:00,888 --> 00:11:02,456 Ooh, but we did see him, 308 00:11:02,457 --> 00:11:05,225 which means the universe-- in all its infinite wisdom-- 309 00:11:05,226 --> 00:11:07,327 is telling you to stick me 310 00:11:07,328 --> 00:11:09,096 and stick me real good. 311 00:11:09,097 --> 00:11:13,366 I can't. I can't in good conscience stick you. 312 00:11:13,367 --> 00:11:16,970 (sighs) I know what's bothering you. 313 00:11:16,971 --> 00:11:18,004 Really? 314 00:11:18,005 --> 00:11:20,073 The cabbages didn't look 315 00:11:20,074 --> 00:11:21,475 enough like Barney. 316 00:11:21,476 --> 00:11:25,178 Well, that's just not true. 317 00:11:25,179 --> 00:11:26,680 No! Time-out! 318 00:11:26,681 --> 00:11:28,248 This is a group decision! 319 00:11:28,249 --> 00:11:31,885 You can't just move to Chicago unless we all say it's okay. 320 00:11:31,886 --> 00:11:33,854 Barney, I think this has to be Robin's... 321 00:11:33,855 --> 00:11:35,455 Stay out of this, Brigitte Nielsen 322 00:11:35,456 --> 00:11:37,824 or Dolph Lundgren from Rocky IV! 323 00:11:37,825 --> 00:11:39,559 We need Marshall and Lily. 324 00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:41,595 That cabbie was like a foot shorter than Barney! 325 00:11:41,596 --> 00:11:43,330 He was the exact same size! 326 00:11:43,331 --> 00:11:45,665 And you know what? I think he was Asian. 327 00:11:45,666 --> 00:11:48,568 Yeah, that guy was like a tiny, graying Asian man 328 00:11:48,569 --> 00:11:50,637 WI-with a soul patch and a potbelly. 329 00:11:50,638 --> 00:11:52,639 Have you completely forgotten what Barney looks like?! 330 00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:54,508 You guys banging? (Marshall and Lily scream) 331 00:11:54,509 --> 00:11:56,243 Why are you in our bedroom? 332 00:11:57,011 --> 00:11:57,911 (both scream) 333 00:11:57,912 --> 00:11:59,279 Why are you in our bedroom? 334 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:01,281 (both scream) Why is Ellen DeGeneres 335 00:12:01,282 --> 00:12:02,516 in our bedroom? 336 00:12:02,517 --> 00:12:06,520 (both chuckling) Hey, this is working! 337 00:12:06,521 --> 00:12:09,356 Wait a minute. 338 00:12:09,357 --> 00:12:10,757 Candles... 339 00:12:10,758 --> 00:12:12,425 Flowers... 340 00:12:12,426 --> 00:12:15,996 Oh, I guess Marshall "forgot" to tell you. 341 00:12:15,997 --> 00:12:17,964 The Fifth Doppelganger... 342 00:12:17,965 --> 00:12:19,132 was me. 343 00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:22,235 What? Wait, and you knew about this? 344 00:12:22,236 --> 00:12:23,403 You lied to me? 345 00:12:23,404 --> 00:12:24,771 By omission, and it's only because 346 00:12:24,772 --> 00:12:26,406 this whole "leave it to the universe" thing 347 00:12:26,407 --> 00:12:27,741 of yours is insane, Lily. 348 00:12:27,742 --> 00:12:30,210 Baby, you... Lily, we need to be in control of our own... 349 00:12:30,211 --> 00:12:33,180 Guys, guys! We're forgetting what's really important here. 350 00:12:33,181 --> 00:12:36,316 Ted's blond. (all chuckling) 351 00:12:36,317 --> 00:12:39,252 Guys, I am pulling this off. 352 00:12:40,121 --> 00:12:41,288 Now, Robin has something 353 00:12:41,289 --> 00:12:42,322 important to tell you. 354 00:12:42,323 --> 00:12:43,456 He's not pulling it off. 355 00:12:43,457 --> 00:12:44,858 No, the other thing. 356 00:12:44,859 --> 00:12:45,926 He got a manicure. 357 00:12:45,927 --> 00:12:47,460 The other thing. 358 00:12:48,329 --> 00:12:50,964 I got a job offer in Chicago. 359 00:12:50,965 --> 00:12:52,766 Whoa. 360 00:12:52,767 --> 00:12:54,668 That's why we all came down here-- 361 00:12:54,669 --> 00:12:56,870 to try and talk Robin out of making a huge... 362 00:12:56,871 --> 00:12:59,573 Actually, I-I've, I've already made a decision. 363 00:13:00,708 --> 00:13:03,276 (sighs) Guys, I gotta take it. 364 00:13:10,007 --> 00:13:12,042 I can't believe we're losing Robin. 365 00:13:13,844 --> 00:13:16,579 Guys, this might be the depression talking, 366 00:13:16,580 --> 00:13:19,149 but is Ted's hair starting to look kind of good? 367 00:13:19,150 --> 00:13:21,684 Thank God, I thought I was the only one! 368 00:13:21,685 --> 00:13:24,954 He looks like a freakin' movie star! 369 00:13:24,955 --> 00:13:27,290 Oh, and by the way, this was a huge mistake. 370 00:13:27,291 --> 00:13:28,992 I'm changing my hair back. 371 00:13:28,993 --> 00:13:31,094 Smart. Told ya. 372 00:13:31,095 --> 00:13:32,729 Not at all awesome. 373 00:13:32,730 --> 00:13:34,164 Hey. 374 00:13:34,165 --> 00:13:35,331 Hey. Hey. 375 00:13:35,332 --> 00:13:38,935 So, I just got off the phone with Chicago. 376 00:13:38,936 --> 00:13:40,937 Yes, I have made a decision. 377 00:13:40,938 --> 00:13:43,139 Um... 378 00:13:47,778 --> 00:13:51,214 I appreciate the offer, but I can't take the job. 379 00:13:51,215 --> 00:13:53,149 Thanks. 380 00:13:53,150 --> 00:13:54,384 I'm staying. 381 00:13:54,385 --> 00:13:55,618 Damn straight! Yay! 382 00:13:55,619 --> 00:13:57,921 (all exclaiming) 383 00:13:57,922 --> 00:13:59,289 Robin! 384 00:14:01,425 --> 00:14:02,459 Hey, Lily, 385 00:14:02,460 --> 00:14:03,893 tell me something. 386 00:14:03,894 --> 00:14:06,729 When you saw actual Barney driving that cab, 387 00:14:06,730 --> 00:14:10,033 and you thought he was a petite, potbellied Asian man? 388 00:14:10,034 --> 00:14:11,668 I know. Weird, right? 389 00:14:11,669 --> 00:14:12,702 It's not weird. 390 00:14:12,703 --> 00:14:15,104 It means you're not ready. 391 00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:17,774 And I'm... I'm sorry that I tried to rush things. 392 00:14:18,709 --> 00:14:19,843 Our baby can wait 393 00:14:19,844 --> 00:14:21,144 for the real Doppelganger Barney. 394 00:14:21,145 --> 00:14:22,345 Oh... 395 00:14:25,216 --> 00:14:26,449 Mm. 396 00:14:26,450 --> 00:14:28,451 Mm. 397 00:14:33,224 --> 00:14:35,859 (mimics Monty): Hey, Moo-Moo. 398 00:14:35,860 --> 00:14:37,694 Monty made you thin-crust pizza 399 00:14:37,695 --> 00:14:38,995 just the way you like it! 400 00:14:38,996 --> 00:14:41,731 Hi. Mmm... 401 00:14:41,732 --> 00:14:43,166 You okay? 402 00:14:43,167 --> 00:14:46,102 Robin, you're not gonna believe this. 403 00:14:46,103 --> 00:14:50,240 I got offered the lead anchor job at WNKW in Chicago. 404 00:14:51,709 --> 00:14:53,977 Oh. 405 00:14:53,978 --> 00:14:57,313 Um, what'd you say? 406 00:14:59,283 --> 00:15:00,650 I said yes. 407 00:15:02,086 --> 00:15:05,388 I've been waiting years for a shot like this. 408 00:15:11,428 --> 00:15:12,595 Barney? 409 00:15:12,596 --> 00:15:14,931 (Estonian accent): I am simple street performer 410 00:15:14,932 --> 00:15:16,533 from Estonia. 411 00:15:16,534 --> 00:15:18,401 Who is this Barney? 412 00:15:18,402 --> 00:15:20,136 Oh, he's just this guy we know 413 00:15:20,137 --> 00:15:21,838 who has, like, a really lame blog. 414 00:15:21,839 --> 00:15:24,107 I hear it's getting better. 415 00:15:24,108 --> 00:15:26,476 I mean, wha-what is "blog"? 416 00:15:26,477 --> 00:15:28,978 It's just something that was cool, like, eight years ago. 417 00:15:28,979 --> 00:15:31,614 Still cool. Still sounds pretty cool, man. 418 00:15:31,615 --> 00:15:32,582 What's your name? 419 00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,517 Kristof. Kristof what? 420 00:15:36,287 --> 00:15:37,820 Kristof... 421 00:15:37,821 --> 00:15:39,656 Doppelganger. 422 00:15:39,657 --> 00:15:40,957 Really? Yep. 423 00:15:40,958 --> 00:15:42,225 You're gonna go with 424 00:15:42,226 --> 00:15:43,760 the last name (mimics accent): "Doppelganger"? 425 00:15:43,761 --> 00:15:44,761 That's my name, man. 426 00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:47,330 Bro... 427 00:15:47,331 --> 00:15:49,299 Robin, wait. Please try to understand. 428 00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:50,767 I gotta get out of here. 429 00:15:50,768 --> 00:15:52,168 Wait. Put yourself in my shoes. 430 00:15:52,169 --> 00:15:54,170 Can you imagine what it's like to have the phone ring, 431 00:15:54,171 --> 00:15:56,039 and it's your dream job on the other end? 432 00:15:56,040 --> 00:16:00,310 Yes... I can. 433 00:16:00,311 --> 00:16:04,147 (voice breaking): Good luck in Chicago, Don. 434 00:16:08,919 --> 00:16:10,820 Barney, why are you doing this? 435 00:16:10,821 --> 00:16:11,821 (grunts) 436 00:16:11,822 --> 00:16:13,089 Wait a minute. 437 00:16:13,090 --> 00:16:14,924 Could it, could it be 438 00:16:14,925 --> 00:16:17,460 that Barney Stinson actually wants us to have kids? 439 00:16:17,461 --> 00:16:18,962 Who is this Barney?! 440 00:16:18,963 --> 00:16:21,631 Take American chill pill! 441 00:16:21,632 --> 00:16:24,400 Well, let me tell you about him. 442 00:16:24,401 --> 00:16:27,770 He talks a big game about how no one should 443 00:16:27,771 --> 00:16:30,940 ever have kids before they're at least 45. 444 00:16:30,941 --> 00:16:32,742 I would be interested in reading 445 00:16:32,743 --> 00:16:35,545 some of these opinions in blog form. 446 00:16:35,546 --> 00:16:37,814 But I think I know what happened. 447 00:16:37,815 --> 00:16:40,383 Yesterday, Barney thought he had to say good-bye 448 00:16:40,384 --> 00:16:42,018 to someone he truly loves. 449 00:16:42,019 --> 00:16:43,786 And it got him thinking... 450 00:16:43,787 --> 00:16:46,289 Maybe it wouldn't be the worst thing 451 00:16:46,290 --> 00:16:48,224 if a baby joined our little group. 452 00:16:48,225 --> 00:16:51,361 Babies... 453 00:16:51,362 --> 00:16:53,262 can be cute. 454 00:16:53,263 --> 00:16:56,966 Mm. And someday, he's gonna make 455 00:16:56,967 --> 00:16:59,002 the best uncle in the world. 456 00:16:59,003 --> 00:17:00,970 Because this Barney... 457 00:17:00,971 --> 00:17:03,206 He's family to us. 458 00:17:13,751 --> 00:17:15,618 (Eastern-European accent): Excuse me. 459 00:17:15,619 --> 00:17:17,487 I heard you're from Estonia. 460 00:17:17,488 --> 00:17:19,322 So am I. 461 00:17:19,323 --> 00:17:21,491 Excuse me one moment. 462 00:17:23,694 --> 00:17:26,496 (normal voice, sotto voce): Estonia would close out the Baltics! 463 00:17:26,497 --> 00:17:30,867 And I am street performer like you. 464 00:17:45,382 --> 00:17:47,083 Ay-yi-yi-yi! 465 00:17:48,185 --> 00:17:50,520 (knocking) 466 00:17:50,521 --> 00:17:51,621 Hey. 467 00:17:51,622 --> 00:17:54,190 Say yes to this. 468 00:17:54,191 --> 00:17:55,258 Okay. 469 00:17:55,259 --> 00:17:57,560 (voice breaking): Can I move back in? 470 00:17:59,229 --> 00:18:01,664 (sniffling) 471 00:18:01,665 --> 00:18:03,533 Yes. 472 00:18:06,236 --> 00:18:08,838 But, Ted, am I just the biggest idiot in the world? 473 00:18:08,839 --> 00:18:12,041 Look, think about all of us five years ago 474 00:18:12,042 --> 00:18:13,776 when we first met you. 475 00:18:13,777 --> 00:18:16,713 Marshall and Lily were just boyfriend and girlfriend. 476 00:18:16,714 --> 00:18:19,649 Now they're married and thinking about kids. 477 00:18:19,650 --> 00:18:20,917 And Barney? 478 00:18:20,918 --> 00:18:23,553 Barney was never gonna commit to anyone ever. 479 00:18:23,554 --> 00:18:27,223 And last year, he fell in love. 480 00:18:27,224 --> 00:18:29,225 And me? 481 00:18:29,226 --> 00:18:32,528 I was chasing some girl I was convinced was "The One." 482 00:18:32,529 --> 00:18:35,898 Now she's one of my closest friends. 483 00:18:35,899 --> 00:18:37,266 And you? 484 00:18:37,267 --> 00:18:40,136 Five years ago, you never would have chosen love 485 00:18:40,137 --> 00:18:43,506 over your career, but today you did. 486 00:18:43,507 --> 00:18:45,875 Looks like I'm getting dumber. No, 487 00:18:45,876 --> 00:18:48,544 (sighs) just more courageous. 488 00:18:51,315 --> 00:18:52,482 Look, we've all been searching 489 00:18:52,483 --> 00:18:53,783 for The Five Doppelgangers, right? 490 00:18:53,784 --> 00:18:54,784 Mm. 491 00:18:54,785 --> 00:18:56,452 But eventually, over time, 492 00:18:56,453 --> 00:18:58,821 we all become our own doppelgangers. 493 00:18:58,822 --> 00:19:01,657 You know, these... these completely different people 494 00:19:01,658 --> 00:19:04,761 who just happen to look like us. 495 00:19:04,762 --> 00:19:07,463 "Five Years Ago Robin"? 496 00:19:07,464 --> 00:19:10,466 That girl, she was pretty great. 497 00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:14,403 But Doppelganger Robin? 498 00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:16,973 She's amazing. 499 00:19:26,884 --> 00:19:30,586 We've, um, we've had a lot to drink... 500 00:19:30,587 --> 00:19:32,054 I don't care. 501 00:19:34,658 --> 00:19:38,361 (snickering) What? 502 00:19:38,362 --> 00:19:40,630 (laughing) Oh. Oh, yeah. 503 00:19:40,631 --> 00:19:42,465 I forgot I'm blond. 504 00:19:42,466 --> 00:19:44,367 I have blond hair. 505 00:19:44,368 --> 00:19:47,003 And that's the story of how dying my hair blond 506 00:19:47,004 --> 00:19:48,371 kept us from doing something 507 00:19:48,372 --> 00:19:50,907 we both would have regretted that night. 508 00:19:50,908 --> 00:19:53,943 Kids, the universe is funny. 509 00:20:01,952 --> 00:20:03,820 Oh, my God! 510 00:20:04,988 --> 00:20:06,656 Yes! You're here! 511 00:20:06,657 --> 00:20:08,057 This is fantastic! 512 00:20:08,058 --> 00:20:09,859 Baby, simmer. Your husband's right there. 513 00:20:09,860 --> 00:20:11,327 At least attempt to hide it. 514 00:20:11,328 --> 00:20:13,129 Guys, follow me! 515 00:20:16,133 --> 00:20:17,567 Guys, look! 516 00:20:17,568 --> 00:20:19,635 The Fifth Doppelganger! 517 00:20:23,073 --> 00:20:24,674 Uh, Lily? 518 00:20:24,675 --> 00:20:26,008 That dude looks noth... 519 00:20:26,009 --> 00:20:27,076 MARSHALL: Guys... 520 00:20:27,077 --> 00:20:28,611 Go with it. 521 00:20:28,612 --> 00:20:33,049 Kids, you can ask the universe for signs all you want... 522 00:20:33,050 --> 00:20:35,318 It's uncanny. Right? 523 00:20:35,319 --> 00:20:37,320 Just like Barney. Amazing. 524 00:20:37,321 --> 00:20:39,121 It's like looking in the mirror. 525 00:20:39,122 --> 00:20:42,625 But ultimately, we only see what we want to see 526 00:20:42,626 --> 00:20:44,393 when we're ready to see it. 527 00:20:44,394 --> 00:20:47,864 So, um, does this mean...? 528 00:20:47,865 --> 00:20:49,799 Marshall Eriksen... 529 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,934 put a baby in my belly. 530 00:20:51,935 --> 00:20:54,036 Mm... 531 00:20:55,444 --> 00:21:05,881 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com