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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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♪ Louie, Louie, Louie Louaaa ♪
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♪ Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie ♪
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♪ Louie, Louie
you're gonna die ♪
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♪ Louie, Louie, Louie
Louie... ♪
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Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become
a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM
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Ladies and
gentlemen, the captain has illuminated
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our seat belt sign
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indicating our descent to
Miami International Airport.
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Please put your tray tables
and your seat backs
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in the upright position.
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We'll be landing in Miami soon.
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Hi, I'm checking in.
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I know it's not popular to say,
but I hate balloons.
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This is bullshit.
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Jesus.
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I'm sorry, bro,
I didn't see you there.
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I'm sorry.
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Hey!
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Hey, that's my--
Don't take my chair!
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That's my stuff!
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Hey!
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That's my stuff!
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Hey!
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Hey!
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Buddy, I'm not drown...
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I'm not drowning!
Relax.
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I'm not drowning!
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That guy was taking my stuff, I'm not--
Relax, relax.
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I'm not drowning!
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I'm not drowning,
I'm telling you!
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I got you, I got you,
I got you!
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- Is he all right?
- Is he okay?
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Hey, come on, bro.
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You all right, bro?
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Yeah.
Don't be embarrassed, man.
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Anyone can lose control in the water.
Okay.
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You okay?
Uh-huh.
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God!
I'll stay here with you for a bit.
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Okay.
I'm Ramon.
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00:05:09,938 --> 00:05:12,273
I'm Louie.
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00:05:12,341 --> 00:05:13,908
You on vacation?
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What?
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00:05:15,444 --> 00:05:16,411
You on vacation, you--
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00:05:16,478 --> 00:05:17,478
No, I...
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00:05:19,281 --> 00:05:20,748
I'm a comedian, I--
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I'm working at the hotel,
I'm doing shows.
48
00:05:23,452 --> 00:05:24,819
Oh, yeah, yeah, I heard
there was a comedian
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in the lounge, man.
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I'm might have to come check you out.
Okay.
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You know, it's good to laugh,
you know, it's like--
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it's like a gift you
give people, you know?
53
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You funny?
Are you funny?
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Yeah.
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Well, then I did a good
thing by saving you.
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Yeah, but you know, I...
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I wasn't drowning.
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I, uh...
Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.
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Yeah, you weren't drowning.
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Totally, man, I got you.
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Anyway, thank you very much.
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Good night, thank you.
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- Hey.
- Hey, man.
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Hey, Ramon.
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Hey, I'm glad you came, man.
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00:06:14,303 --> 00:06:16,438
Hey, man, you were
so funny, like--
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So funny, I was laughing so hard, man.
Oh, thanks, man.
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00:06:19,741 --> 00:06:22,042
Can I buy you a drink
for saving my life?
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I'll have Sprite.
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00:06:24,912 --> 00:06:26,179
Can I get a thing--
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Brown shot?
Thanks, man.
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00:06:28,583 --> 00:06:30,083
So, um...
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You from Miami?
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00:06:31,419 --> 00:06:33,453
Well, I was born in Cuba.
Really?
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00:06:33,521 --> 00:06:35,255
Yeah, then I came here
when I was a baby.
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00:06:35,323 --> 00:06:36,790
That's a big move
for a little baby.
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I mean my parents brought me
here when I was a baby.
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Like on a raft or something?
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Or something.
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I'm sorry, man.
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I-- I know nothing.
No worries, man.
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No, that was stupid.
No, no, no.
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My Uncle Chavo used to say,
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"Dice no se,
entonces aprendes todo."
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It means--
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Say you don't know
and then you learn everything.
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¿ Hablas español?
Well, not really.
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I forgot a lot of it,
but we lived in Mexico
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00:07:03,784 --> 00:07:04,851
when I was a kid.
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00:07:04,919 --> 00:07:06,186
My dad's Mexican.
No shit.
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00:07:06,253 --> 00:07:07,754
No shit at all.
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00:07:07,822 --> 00:07:09,990
My mom's American, but we
came here when I was seven,
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just like you.
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00:07:11,225 --> 00:07:12,392
Well, all right, hermano.
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Can I have one of these?
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Thanks.
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00:07:22,903 --> 00:07:24,638
Uh, no, you can't.
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What?
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00:07:26,073 --> 00:07:28,208
No, you can't have
one of my strawberries.
100
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But I already ate it.
101
00:07:30,411 --> 00:07:31,778
I know, that's what--
102
00:07:31,846 --> 00:07:34,114
You asked me if you could
have one and I said no,
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so you just ate a strawberry
that you can't have.
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Hey.
Hey.
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What are you doing?
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This.
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I'm going to a big party
with good music, good food,
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Cuban style.
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Pechuga a la parilla.
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It's gonna be a good time.
Great.
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So come on, let's go.
112
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What, me?
You.
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00:08:01,341 --> 00:08:02,441
No, man,
I don't want to--
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You don't want to what?
Have a good time?
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Come on, man, I'm gonna show
you Miami, like, for real.
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You're really inviting me?
I'm inviting you.
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Okay.
Yeah?
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Yeah, all right.
119
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Let's go.
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Now?
Like right now.
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Okay, all right.
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Louie.
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Louie, ¿ cómo está?
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Hey, Santiago.
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Myron, Myron...
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Mama, Mama.
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Louie... Louie!
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00:09:55,101 --> 00:09:57,136
Ay, qué sudado está
el americano.
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Oyeme, ¿ vas a comer lechona?
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Mofongo, platanitos, lechón.
131
00:10:02,909 --> 00:10:03,943
¿ Algo de tomar, mira?
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Dale, dale comida.
133
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Te voy a presentarte un amigo.
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Se llama Louie.
Si, Louie?
135
00:10:08,982 --> 00:10:11,017
Si.
Ven aca.
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00:10:11,085 --> 00:10:12,418
Louie.
137
00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:15,422
Un amigo es un hermano
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y un hermano es un amigo.
139
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Me entiende?
Si, yes.
140
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Lo vemos.
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Thank you, thank you.
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Vamos, pues!
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Hola.
144
00:10:54,497 --> 00:10:56,198
I see what you're doing.
Hey, Ramon.
145
00:10:56,266 --> 00:10:57,933
I got no moves.
How you liking it, hermano?
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00:10:58,001 --> 00:10:59,401
Oh, it's-- it's great.
147
00:10:59,469 --> 00:11:00,602
I mean, you took me
here and let me
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00:11:00,670 --> 00:11:02,304
meet your whole family, man.
149
00:11:02,372 --> 00:11:05,975
Thank you, I appreciate it.
Of course, man, it's my pleasure.
150
00:11:06,043 --> 00:11:08,344
How you liking the real Miami?
Oh, it's amazing, man.
151
00:11:08,412 --> 00:11:09,913
I never-- in fact,
152
00:11:09,980 --> 00:11:11,181
I've been coming to Miami for
20 years, I never saw it.
153
00:11:11,248 --> 00:11:12,249
Not like this.
154
00:11:15,686 --> 00:11:18,288
It's kind of like
those people up there.
155
00:11:18,356 --> 00:11:19,723
Some of them been living there
their whole lives
156
00:11:19,791 --> 00:11:23,128
and they've
never seen where I live.
157
00:11:23,195 --> 00:11:25,230
And you look up and then you
see 'em on their balconies
158
00:11:25,297 --> 00:11:27,966
and they're alone.
159
00:11:28,033 --> 00:11:29,634
And you kind of feel sorry
for 'em
160
00:11:29,702 --> 00:11:32,637
because they're alone, you know?
Yeah, I know, I know.
161
00:11:34,373 --> 00:11:35,139
Anyways, man, how--
162
00:11:35,207 --> 00:11:36,507
Where'd you--
163
00:11:36,575 --> 00:11:38,409
Where did you get the balls
to be a comedian?
164
00:11:38,477 --> 00:11:40,377
I gotta admire that.
165
00:11:40,445 --> 00:11:42,046
Shit, I got a show.
166
00:11:42,113 --> 00:11:43,814
I got a show in, like, half an hour.
Of course you got--
167
00:11:43,882 --> 00:11:45,149
I gotta-- Let me call a cab.
No, no, no.
168
00:11:45,216 --> 00:11:46,450
Hey, hey, Benny!
169
00:11:46,518 --> 00:11:48,752
Benny, you got a car, right?
170
00:11:48,820 --> 00:11:49,720
We gotta take Louie!
171
00:11:53,090 --> 00:11:54,257
Out of the way!
172
00:12:03,232 --> 00:12:04,633
Here we go.
Here we go.
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00:12:09,038 --> 00:12:10,204
Hey!
174
00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:12,707
Tú con curvas y yo sin frenos!
175
00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:23,518
Oh, shit, oh, oh, oh!
176
00:12:25,220 --> 00:12:26,988
Hey!
177
00:12:37,265 --> 00:12:38,632
Oye, Louie.
178
00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:40,534
Suerte esta noche, brother,
tírate.
179
00:12:40,602 --> 00:12:43,003
Okay, muchos pantalones, man.
180
00:12:44,738 --> 00:12:46,406
Hey, man, I made it.
181
00:12:46,474 --> 00:12:48,741
Couple minutes to spare, so thanks.
Yeah, that's good, man.
182
00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:50,009
Thanks for coming, you know?
183
00:12:50,077 --> 00:12:52,078
Hey, this is my
last show tonight
184
00:12:52,146 --> 00:12:54,247
and then I go home tomorrow, so...
That's too bad.
185
00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:55,816
Well, you know, life goes on.
186
00:12:55,883 --> 00:12:57,818
But you know what,
it was nice to meet you.
187
00:12:57,885 --> 00:13:00,621
And I wasn't drowning,
188
00:13:00,689 --> 00:13:02,623
but I'm glad you saved me.
Yeah.
189
00:13:02,691 --> 00:13:05,392
And it was good to know you.
190
00:13:05,460 --> 00:13:07,061
Thanks for making me laugh.
191
00:13:07,129 --> 00:13:09,297
Hey, okay.
192
00:13:09,364 --> 00:13:10,297
Have a good one.
Okay.
193
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:13,935
Thanks, man.
194
00:13:27,749 --> 00:13:29,149
Hello?
195
00:13:29,217 --> 00:13:31,017
Hey, Janet, it's Louie.
196
00:13:31,085 --> 00:13:32,352
What's up?
197
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:35,355
Well, I'm in Florida.
Right.
198
00:13:35,422 --> 00:13:36,489
You're coming back
tomorrow, right?
199
00:13:36,557 --> 00:13:38,191
You're gonna pick up the girls?
200
00:13:38,259 --> 00:13:39,692
See, that's the thing,
I--
201
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:41,528
If you can't
do this, it's okay,
202
00:13:41,595 --> 00:13:43,129
I just was wondering if maybe
you could keep the girls
203
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,331
an extra couple nights.
204
00:13:45,399 --> 00:13:47,567
Um, yeah, shouldn't be
a problem.
205
00:13:47,635 --> 00:13:49,002
Are you stuck down there?
206
00:13:49,070 --> 00:13:51,204
No, I just--
207
00:13:51,272 --> 00:13:53,340
I'm just thinking of staying
a couple days more, that's all.
208
00:13:53,408 --> 00:13:54,541
And again, if you can't do it,
209
00:13:54,609 --> 00:13:55,608
I'll pick up the girls
tomorrow.
210
00:13:55,676 --> 00:13:57,644
I'm just checking.
211
00:13:57,712 --> 00:13:59,245
Oh.
212
00:13:59,313 --> 00:14:00,179
You met somebody.
213
00:14:01,882 --> 00:14:03,182
What?
214
00:14:03,250 --> 00:14:04,584
Oh, you met a girl
215
00:14:04,651 --> 00:14:06,152
and you want to stay down
there and be with her.
216
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:07,453
That's fine.
217
00:14:07,521 --> 00:14:09,489
No, that's not what's
going on here.
218
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:10,823
Well, why else would you
want to stay down there?
219
00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:11,891
You hate Florida.
220
00:14:11,959 --> 00:14:13,092
You met someone.
221
00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:16,328
I didn't-- I mean,
I met somebody, but not--
222
00:14:16,396 --> 00:14:17,764
Oh, see?
223
00:14:17,831 --> 00:14:19,799
Good for you, Louie.
224
00:14:19,867 --> 00:14:21,100
We've been divorced
for three years.
225
00:14:21,168 --> 00:14:23,069
You don't have to
hide that shit from me.
226
00:14:23,136 --> 00:14:24,770
I'm glad for you.
227
00:14:24,838 --> 00:14:27,745
Stay in Florida for a couple
days, I'll cover for you.
228
00:14:28,174 --> 00:14:29,855
Enjoy your new someone.
229
00:14:49,076 --> 00:14:50,604
Hey.
230
00:14:51,135 --> 00:14:53,713
Hey, man.
Hey.
231
00:14:53,781 --> 00:14:55,115
What are you doing here?
232
00:14:55,182 --> 00:14:58,284
I thought you left today.
No, I changed my flight.
233
00:14:58,352 --> 00:15:00,220
I'm going--
I'm staying 'til Wednesday.
234
00:15:00,287 --> 00:15:01,554
Okay.
235
00:15:01,622 --> 00:15:04,124
Cool.
236
00:15:04,192 --> 00:15:05,692
You going for a swim or...
237
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:07,327
Yeah, yeah.
238
00:15:07,395 --> 00:15:09,296
Well, I'm on break so I'll join you.
Okay, all right.
239
00:15:50,672 --> 00:15:52,573
Let me get back in the chair.
240
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:54,174
Okay, man, yeah.
All right.
241
00:15:54,242 --> 00:15:55,743
Have a good one.
Yeah, you too.
242
00:16:12,660 --> 00:16:14,561
Ramon.
Hey, Louie.
243
00:16:14,629 --> 00:16:16,196
Hey.
What's up?
244
00:16:16,264 --> 00:16:19,299
Hey, how you doing?
Good.
245
00:16:19,366 --> 00:16:20,967
What are you--
You wanna hang out?
246
00:16:21,035 --> 00:16:23,937
What are you doing?
Yeah, uh...
247
00:16:24,004 --> 00:16:25,004
I got an idea.
248
00:16:25,072 --> 00:16:27,407
Let's, uh, let's grab a drink.
249
00:16:27,474 --> 00:16:28,375
Yeah, okay.
250
00:16:35,450 --> 00:16:38,118
Hey, Louie, can I--
251
00:16:38,186 --> 00:16:40,020
Can I ask you something?
252
00:16:40,088 --> 00:16:42,356
Yeah.
253
00:16:42,424 --> 00:16:45,659
It might be a little weird
254
00:16:45,727 --> 00:16:47,828
kind of question,
but it's--
255
00:16:47,896 --> 00:16:49,530
It's just I been--
256
00:16:49,598 --> 00:16:53,200
Why did you stay here longer?
257
00:16:53,268 --> 00:16:55,702
Oh, why-- why did I--
258
00:16:55,770 --> 00:16:58,338
Yeah.
259
00:16:58,406 --> 00:17:01,374
Well, I, you know...
260
00:17:01,442 --> 00:17:03,476
I just...
261
00:17:03,544 --> 00:17:05,511
Okay, you know,
262
00:17:05,579 --> 00:17:07,480
to be honest, I just wanted to
263
00:17:07,548 --> 00:17:11,117
spend more time, you know,
hanging out and--
264
00:17:11,185 --> 00:17:13,987
Yeah, see--
265
00:17:14,054 --> 00:17:17,023
That's what I thought.
Yeah, but-- but-- but--yeah, but...
266
00:17:17,091 --> 00:17:18,391
Look, I know what--
267
00:17:18,459 --> 00:17:20,793
I know what-- I know what--
I know what you're asking,
268
00:17:20,861 --> 00:17:23,162
but-- but--
269
00:17:23,230 --> 00:17:24,430
No, no, no, no.
270
00:17:24,498 --> 00:17:26,265
I mean, it's cool.
Yeah, yeah, no, no--
271
00:17:26,333 --> 00:17:28,768
It's me, it's just that...
Yeah, but--
272
00:17:28,836 --> 00:17:30,303
It's just that I,
you know, I--
273
00:17:30,371 --> 00:17:31,871
Yeah, but I'm not--
274
00:17:31,939 --> 00:17:33,773
I'm not--
Okay.
275
00:17:33,841 --> 00:17:36,409
Like, I don't--
276
00:17:36,476 --> 00:17:38,945
Like, I don't judge anybody.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, me neither, it's not--
277
00:17:39,012 --> 00:17:40,546
And I'm not--
278
00:17:40,614 --> 00:17:43,482
Okay, first of all, I have
zero anything, okay?
279
00:17:43,550 --> 00:17:45,518
Okay.
280
00:17:45,586 --> 00:17:47,520
I guess what--
the thing is is just that--
281
00:17:47,588 --> 00:17:48,788
I feel like--
282
00:17:48,856 --> 00:17:50,691
See, see?
No.
283
00:17:50,758 --> 00:17:52,359
I'm gonna stop you there.
284
00:17:52,427 --> 00:17:53,660
Okay, thank you.
Look, man.
285
00:17:53,728 --> 00:17:55,395
What--
My Uncle Chavo, right?
286
00:17:55,463 --> 00:17:57,230
Yeah.
When he said all men are brothers?
287
00:17:57,298 --> 00:17:58,932
Mm-hmm.
Cool.
288
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,333
It's true, man.
Right, right.
289
00:18:00,401 --> 00:18:02,168
And honestly,
you're a great guy.
290
00:18:02,236 --> 00:18:04,737
You're a great guy.
Cool, fun to hang out with.
291
00:18:04,805 --> 00:18:06,572
Same to you, you know.
It's...
292
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:10,409
It's just... be yourself.
293
00:18:10,477 --> 00:18:11,444
You know what I mean?
What do you mean?
294
00:18:11,511 --> 00:18:13,145
No, what do you mean?
Be myself?
295
00:18:13,213 --> 00:18:14,547
Yeah, like...
296
00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:16,215
All right, I got this
cousin Manny, right?
297
00:18:16,283 --> 00:18:18,618
Oh, no, no, yeah, but that...
298
00:18:18,686 --> 00:18:21,288
Ramon... I'm not...
299
00:18:24,459 --> 00:18:25,792
I...
300
00:18:25,860 --> 00:18:28,462
You-- you--
I just--
301
00:18:28,530 --> 00:18:29,896
It's-- it's not--
302
00:18:29,964 --> 00:18:32,132
It's like I don't know
if I've ever--
303
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,601
I don't know
that I've ever--
304
00:18:34,669 --> 00:18:37,737
I'm not trying--
I'm not trying anything to...
305
00:18:37,805 --> 00:18:38,905
And I don't even--
306
00:18:38,973 --> 00:18:41,041
I mean, I'm not--
307
00:18:41,109 --> 00:18:42,576
I mean, dude.
308
00:18:42,644 --> 00:18:44,178
Okay, you know, no, I know.
309
00:18:44,245 --> 00:18:45,679
I'm-- hey, man, y'know--
310
00:18:45,747 --> 00:18:47,814
Yeah, okay.
311
00:18:47,882 --> 00:18:49,750
All right, uh...
Okay.
312
00:18:49,818 --> 00:18:50,918
I don't take anything back.
313
00:18:50,986 --> 00:18:52,653
You know what I mean?
Me neither, man.
314
00:18:52,721 --> 00:18:54,355
Yeah, yeah, yeah, man.
It was fun, it was cool, you know what I mean?
315
00:18:54,423 --> 00:18:56,425
And you're a good dude and I wish you the best.
Yeah, you too, man.
316
00:18:56,492 --> 00:18:58,160
Hey, man, me too.
Yeah.
317
00:18:58,228 --> 00:18:59,761
Yeah, man, thanks a lot.
318
00:18:59,829 --> 00:19:00,829
Cool, man.
319
00:19:00,897 --> 00:19:02,564
Yeah.
Okay.
320
00:19:02,632 --> 00:19:03,632
Take it easy.
321
00:19:09,305 --> 00:19:12,107
Heterosexual men have a big
burden that we put on ourselves
322
00:19:12,174 --> 00:19:15,944
which is that we want to be
identified as heterosexual men.
323
00:19:16,012 --> 00:19:17,379
We're the only ones that care.
324
00:19:17,446 --> 00:19:20,015
We're the only sexual group
that gives a shit
325
00:19:20,082 --> 00:19:23,652
that we are not mistaken
for anything else.
326
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:25,053
Nobody else cares.
327
00:19:25,121 --> 00:19:26,388
I don't know any women that are
328
00:19:26,456 --> 00:19:28,957
worried someone will think
they're a lesbian.
329
00:19:29,025 --> 00:19:30,259
I've never heard a gay guy say,
330
00:19:30,326 --> 00:19:31,827
"Everybody's gonna think
I'm straight."
331
00:19:31,894 --> 00:19:33,161
It just doesn't happen.
332
00:19:33,229 --> 00:19:35,196
We're the only ones that care,
333
00:19:35,264 --> 00:19:37,565
and it's a drag
for us because we--
334
00:19:37,633 --> 00:19:40,869
There's a lot of things
that we maybe could do
335
00:19:40,936 --> 00:19:43,438
that might be nice
336
00:19:43,506 --> 00:19:46,708
but we can't 'cause someone
will think we're gay.
337
00:19:46,776 --> 00:19:49,010
We can't even
throw some words around.
338
00:19:49,078 --> 00:19:52,414
You can't really throw
"wonderful" around so much.
339
00:19:52,481 --> 00:19:54,849
You can't say "wonderful"
340
00:19:54,917 --> 00:19:56,785
unless you say it, like,
in a gay voice to be funny.
341
00:19:56,852 --> 00:19:58,019
"Oh, it was wonderful."
342
00:19:58,087 --> 00:19:59,888
Like, you can do that
and "ha-ha-ha,"
343
00:19:59,956 --> 00:20:01,590
like I would
ever really say that.
344
00:20:01,657 --> 00:20:03,525
No, but it was wonderful,
it was.
345
00:20:03,593 --> 00:20:06,728
I can't just say
that about anything.
346
00:20:06,796 --> 00:20:09,464
No, that strip club
was wonderful.
347
00:20:09,532 --> 00:20:10,665
It was wonderful.
348
00:20:26,885 --> 00:20:27,952
Oh!
349
00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:31,622
Buddy--
buddy, I'm not--
350
00:20:31,690 --> 00:20:33,724
I'm not drowning,
I'm not--
351
00:20:33,792 --> 00:20:36,527
Big waves, relax, buddy, relax.
352
00:20:36,595 --> 00:20:38,929
I'm not drowning, I'm telling you right now.
You're almost there.
353
00:20:38,997 --> 00:20:40,864
Okay, stop, freeze, freeze,
Miguel, freeze.
354
00:20:40,932 --> 00:20:42,866
Get ahead of us,
get ahead of us.
355
00:20:42,934 --> 00:20:44,835
Get ahead of us.
356
00:20:44,903 --> 00:20:46,270
Ready, ready?
357
00:20:46,338 --> 00:20:48,672
Everybody get ahead of us,
including Sean.
358
00:20:48,740 --> 00:20:50,708
Ready?
Yeah.
359
00:20:50,775 --> 00:20:54,011
Tell me when you're ready.
360
00:20:54,079 --> 00:20:55,946
You ready?
Go.
361
00:20:56,014 --> 00:20:57,214
Ready?
Yeah.
362
00:20:57,282 --> 00:20:59,309
And... action, guys!
363
00:20:59,663 --> 00:21:10,100
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
363
00:21:11,305 --> 00:21:17,582
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