[ moaning ] >> silence!
You two. You have been here for hours,
Having sex with tons of ladies in masks.
Yet it seems you do not have permission to be here.
[ gasping ] >> hi.
Uh, I'm seth. >> hi, I'm matt.
>> why are you here? >> we heard this was the place
To get "robot chicken" un-canceled.
>> but when we got here, everyone was [bleep] so we were
Like, "oh, okay, I guess we'll just start [bleep] these
People." >> we almost felt obligated to
Start [bleep] >> quiet!
In addition to hosting elaborate orgies, we do un-cancel
Television shows. >> awesome!
Can we get our show un-canceled? >> yes -- if you know the
Password. >> both: Fidelio.
>> that is correct. Congratulations.
"robot chicken" is back on the air.
>> both: Thank you, sir. >> now, what is the password to
Leave? >> both: Fidelio?
>> the password to leave is different.
>> oh, right. Fidelio. >> I just told you the password
To leave -- >> fidelio?
>> no! Again, I told you --
>> fidelio? >> you're missing what I --
>> fidelio? >> please understand that
"fidelio" is not the password. If you say "fidelio," that will
Be incorrect. Do you understand this basic
Concept? >> yeah, of course.
>> sure, sure, sure. >> now, what is the password to
Leave? >> fidelio?
>> [bleep] it. Kill them.
>> just like saigon, 1983. >> with a dash of -- wait, when
Were you in saigon? >> duck!
>> aw, no, he touched my dick. >> your dick touched my hand.
I totally touched his dick. >> [ sighs ] [bleep] it.
>> [bleep] it.
>> aah, didn't think that through.
[ guns click ] [ energy charging ]
[ ting! ] >> please, have mercy.
>> sure thing. How about we give you to the
Count of... >> both: Fidelio?
[ thunder crashes ] >> [ laughs evilly ]
[ sawing ]
[ electricity crackles ] >> it's alive!
[ thunder crashes ] >> [ laughs evilly ]
[ smooches ] [ laughs evilly ]
>> the half-pound smurf burger. Only at gargl's jr.
>> all: We make holes in teeth! We make holes in teeth!
>> hey, maybe we should communicate with the humans.
What do we get out of making all of these cavities, anyway?
>> both: We make holes in teeth! We make holes in teeth!
[ elevator bell dings ] >> wait, your stinger's caught!
Our one method of self defense is also fatal to us.
[ sobbing ] does god hate bees? [ choral music ]
>> that's right. [bleep] you, bees.
>> [bleep] me? N-n-no. [bleep] you!
[ whooshes ] >> [ belches ]
[ slurring ] what the [bleep] this is not my house.
[ retches ] >> I'm horny.
You 18? >> no, sir.
>> [ groans ] damn it! [ cellphone dials ]
Becky? Hey, come over.
I want to sex someone. [ click ]
Hello? Mermaid hoe bag!
Did you just call me "gay"? >> no, I didn't say anything.
>> my parents' divorce messed me up, man.
It messed my head up bad! [ sobbing ]
I want chipotle.
[ whooshes ] >> lock that shit.
>> no, bro. No, no, come on, bro.
No, bro! [ sobbing ] no!
>> the dog's arthritis gives him constant pain.
We'll have to put him down. >> what?
>> you do know that the life span of a cat is longer
Than a dog, right? W-with all due respect, you
Really should have seen this coming.
>> [ roars ] ¶ dino riders, awesome bosses of
Early earth ¶ ¶ they trained dinosaurs and
Made them walking weapons ¶ ¶ what's cooler that that? ¶
¶ dino riders, there's a blaster on that t-rex's head ¶
¶ that is so damn rad ¶ ¶ that brontosaurus is a troop
Transporter ¶ ¶ bow to the [bleep]
Dino riders! ¶ ¶ oh, my god, that looks like a
Work camp ¶ ¶ I think the dino riders use
Forced labor to make their stuff ¶
¶ dear lord in heaven, these dino riders are repeatedly
Tasing a man ¶ ¶ that is definitely a work
Camp ¶ ¶ what the [bleep] the
Dino riders just fed that t-rex a child ¶
>> hey, at least we don't have sex with the dinosaurs.
>> speak for yourself, bro. >> jafar, why are you so evil?
>> well, iago, since every other disney villain got a song to
Explain themselves, I'll tell you.
¶ I...Was... ...Molested ¶
>> cut! >> s-snake.
>> [ chuckling ] oh, yes. That's my pet snake.
>> I hate snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?
>> I hate sssome dude's ballsss. Why did it have to be some
Dude's ballsss? >> graduating seniors of
Hogwarts, as the sorting hat placed you into your houses, now
The guidance counselor hat will send you off into the world.
>> all right, let's make this fast.
I'm parked in a loading zone. [ scoffs ]
Who gets a c-minus in quidditch? Here's what I see for you, kid.
Two years of online college, and then [echoing] living at home
Well into your 30s. Damn, you grew up hot.
Whoa! You know what they say --
[bleep] a hufflepuff, marry a gryffindor.
All right, here's the deal, hon. [ echoing ] cpk hostess/escort
On weekends. Harry potter?
Dude, honestly, you nailed it. Get out of here and win at life
While you [echoing] drown in [bleep]
>> if he's drowning in [bleep] sign me up for lifeguard duty.
>> if I'm going down with the titanic, I'm going to die in my
Motorcar, like a gentleman of wealth and dist-- I just sat
In [bleep] >> chow time, boys.
Come and get it. >> hey, cooky, where'd you get
This picante sauce? >> new york city.
>> together: New york city?! [ indistinct shouting ]
>> [ screams ] [ hisses ]
>> I don't know why a 7-year-old would need to deep fry a turkey,
But know you know how. >> both: And knowing is half the
Battle. ¶ g.I. Joe ¶
>> and the emmy for best psa by a paramilitary organization goes
To...G.I. Joe, for "don't be a turkey on thanksgiving."
>> look at them, destro. The joes churn out pedestrian
Advice to dead-eyed children, and the public eats it up!
"hey, kids, don't play with fallen electrical lines."
Reads like a dispatch from the no-shit clinic.
>> I'll get the nerve gas. >> no, you fool.
We'll beat them at their own game.
We'll create our own psas! Okay, okay, let's just throw
Some ideas out there. This is a safe, creative place.
Dr. Mindbender, go. >> well, I thought our psa could
Communicate an idea non-verbally.
I've discovered that painting directly on celluloid creates a
Sort of "tone poem." >> holy shit, that's sounds
Terrible. I'm sorry -- safe place -- but
Holy shit, that was [bleep] dumb.
Next! >> oh, I forgot you guys were in
Here writing. I was just looking for a hammer
To hang my degree in screen writing from aberdeen.
Anything I can do for you while I'm in here?
Destro? >> she's actually really funny,
You guys. >> hey, you lost me at "she's."
[bleep] it. We're doing it without a script.
>> dr. Mindbender, you found four young children for our
Psas. >> uh...Yes.
That is what these kidnapped children are for.
>> okay, storm shadow, these two children will be running with
Scissors. Now, this upsets you, and you --
>> why? >> it's dangerous to run with
Scissors. >> I run with katana.
Is that not dangerous? >> wow, I hadn't thought of
That. Excellent point, storm shadow.
Get this piece of shit off my set.
>> [ giggles ] [ thuds ] [ grunts ]
>> well, cobra commander, looks like I owe you an apology.
>> so, remember, only take supplies if you'll use them for
Post-office business. Any other use is a felony.
>> now I'm aware. >> and awareness is the second
50% of the conflict in question.
Somebody say [bleep] "cut." >> and I think you'll find it's
Not hard to read when you take the time to ssssssssssssssssound
It out. [ both giggle ]
Oh, yesss, I've got a sssmall ssspeech impediment.
[ both laugh ] >> it'sss not funny!
[ both scream ] [ both grunt ]
>> shut...It...Down. >> and the emmy for best psa by
A paramilitary organization goes to...G.I. Joe, for "don't star
In a cobra psa." >> what?
>> ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶
Ba-gawk! Bawk.