[ thunder crashes ]
>> [ laughs evilly ]
[ sawing ]
[ electricity crackles ]
>> it's alive!
[ thunder crashes ]
>> [ laughs evilly ]
[ smooches ]
[ laughs evilly ]
>> gladys, it is time. >> oh, no.
I'm not going out like a bitch. >> wha-- what are you doing?
>> kicking your ass is what I'm doing.
>> no, you aren't. You're going out like a bitch.
>> that's the thigh-master [bleep]
Oh, reaper. >> oh, gladys.
>> oh, reaper. [ bed squeaking ]
>> grandma? >> [ whimpering ]
[ engine sputtering ] >> come on, come on.
[ screams ] >> you're gonna flood the
Engine. Don't pump the gas.
[ engine sputtering ] could be your carburetor.
Pop the hood. Try it again.
>> [ screams ] >> sounds like...Your
Carburetor. >> just checked.
Looks fine. >> fuel pump, maybe.
>> I could just call the auto club.
[ screams ] >> did you check the
Distributor cap? It rained last night.
>> yep, there's water in it. Okay, try it now.
[ engine turns over ] >> you fixed it.
Wow, thank you. >> so, you know what we're gonna
Do now, right? Whoo!
Best night ever! >> best friends ever.
>> best ice cream ever. >> you guys got anywhere to be?
>> actually... >> yeah, right here.
Let's cruise. [ tires squeal ]
>> [ monotone ] drop your weapon.
You have five seconds to comply. [ gun cocks ]
You have four seconds to comply. [ screaming ]
>> get away from me!
>> edward 209, what do you think you're doing?
>> he didn't drop the gun, mama. >> he did drop the gun.
>> aw, I'm sorry, mama. >> you're coming home with me
Now. You have five seconds to comply.
[ gun cocks ] >> okay, mama.
You have four seconds to comply. >> but I said "okay, mama."
>> see how it feels, edward? >> what the [bleep] is going on?
>> bud. >> why.
>> guys, I have cirrhosis of the liver.
>> bud. >> why?
>> because I have a drinking problem.
>> well, after crossing the freeway, base jumping off a
Cliff, and dodging bullets in a gang war, we finally found my
Reptar doll. >> tommy, what are you doing in
The street? >> oh, thank god.
They've been lost for hours. Where were they?
>> stu, a word. [ muffled ] what the [bleep]
Stu? >> [ muffled ] well, I'm sorry.
The babies escaped, and I -- >> escaped?
They're babies, you sack-less moron.
>> I was downstairs, working on a new toy, and they just --
>> oh, a new toy. Never mind, then.
>> didi, if you keep ridiculing my work, I-I swear to god --
>> what? You'll hit me? Ooh, you're such a man.
[ crashes ] >> didi, stop.
>> I'll be the man. [ thudding, crashing ]
See, stu? I'm the man! >> [ sobbing ] I want a divorce.
>> these al-qaeda drivers are the best, and they plan to
Smuggle a nuclear device across the mexican border.
>> gonna have to fight fire with fire.
>> you don't mean -- >> that's right.
We're gonna need the baddest, brashest, ballsiest hot-shit
Drivers in the world, and I know just the assholes.
[ cheering ] [ engine revs ]
[ engine revving ]
[ cranking, pounding ]
>> whoooo-ee. >> your country needs you.
You in? >> me and uncle sam, we haven't
Always seen eye-to-eye. >> we want our records scrubbed
Clean. Full pardons.
>> one last job, and then we're out.
>> I'm really confused, and I want to go home.
>> go team! [ moans ]
>> I-I-I-I don't [groans]
[ car whirring ] >> nice remote-control car, you
Eccentric bitch. I'm gonna step on it.
>> when people try to put me down, I use punky power.
>> "punky power"? >> [ groans ]
It's what she calls "believing in yourself."
>> actually, punky power [demonic voice] is this.
[ screaming ] >> oh, no.
I've heard of this. The elders in my world spoke of
The chosen one from earth who would possess ultimate power.
>> I will destroy the world with punky power.
>> stop this, punky. Don't destroy the world.
>> I was abandoned in a grocery store.
Why shouldn't I destroy the world?
It doesn't need me. >> but I need you, punky.
You're like my real daughter, and I would never abandon you --
Never! >> do -- [ normal voice ] do you
Mean it? >> [ panting ]
What should I do with the body?
>> who cares? She's not my real daughter.
>> by the power of grayskull... I have the power!
>> hey, could you not have the power at 3:00 a.M.?
Some of us have to wake up in three hours, for [bleep] sake.
>> nothing more for you here, agent starling.
Fly, fly, fly. >> I bit my wrist.
Look at the blood! >> [ gags ]
>> agent starling! Multiple miggs will suffer for
That. Buffalo bill went by an alias
Once. Mofet. M-o-f-e-t.
Go now! >> I really cut my wrists this
Time. >> are you hurt?
>> blammo! >> [ gags ]
>> agent starling! I didn't think miggs could
Manage again so soon. The answer is in the file.
What does buffalo bill covet? Go now!
>> you want to adopt a kitten? >> where'd you get a kitten?
>> it's from my dick! >> [ gasps ]
>> agent starling! Are you retarded,
Agent starling? Stop letting miggs hit you with
His spooge. Look, bill hates his own
Identity and he thinks that makes him a transsexual.
Go now! >> want to see a magic trick?
>> well, I like magic. >> abracadabra!
>> [ gags ] >> agent starling!
Miggs must have horse balls or something.
I've never seen anything like it.
Look, buffalo bill wasn't born a killer.
He was made one through years of systematic abuse.
Go now! Agent starling!
The exit is right here.
I don't think she's gonna catch that guy.
>> you know, mr. Mayor, more than just children celebrate
Halloween. So this year, why don't we cater
Our celebration to adults? >> what do you mean?
>> ¶ when you're a child, Halloween is so sweet ¶
¶ haunted houses, candy, and treats ¶
¶ but after you turn 18, there's a brand-new reason for
Halloween ¶ ¶ this is grown-up Halloween,
This is grown-up Halloween ¶ ¶ grown-up, grown-up, Halloween,
Halloween ¶ >> ¶ I am the girl who's dressed
Like a bee ¶ >> ¶ that's not a bee, I've seen
A bee ¶ >> ¶ I am the herpes in her
Underwear, ready to jump out and give you a scare ¶
>> ¶ powerpuff girls drink from a flask shared by a douche in a
Nixon mask ¶ >> ¶ I don't have a condom
On me ¶ >> ¶ [bleep] it, this is
Hallow[retches] ¶ >> ¶ this is grown-up Halloween,
This is grown-up Halloween ¶ ¶ grown-up, grown-up,
Halloween ¶ >> ¶ Halloween ¶
>> [ screams ] >> [ coos ]
>> our baby will be safe now. On earth, he'll be a god amongst
Men. [ beeping, air hissing ]
>> to think, you've found a way to stock enough food and oxygen
To last his long journey. >> I just shot a dead baby into
Space.
>> in other news, a topographical map of eternia
Has finally been completed. Snake mountain is the tallest
Peak in eternia. >> it better not be.
[ indistinct conversations ] come on, man.
There's clif bar wrappers everywhere now!
>> littering is evil, skeletor. We're evil. What's the problem?
>> ohh, I don't want to have this debate with you again,
Evil-lyn. You're talking about cartoon
Evil, not real-world evil, which is essentially a heightened
Narcissism. >> put it in your dissertation,
>> wha-- there are laws!
>> bro, we are gonna summit this
Thing, dude.
>> hope you [bleep] die, dude.
Mother[bleep]
When we blow up the peak of snake mountain, it will cease to
Be the highest point in eternia. >> that seems like cutting off
Your nose to spite your face. >> well, I've done that, too,
And I think the results speak for themselves.
>> ¶ he was born in the land of avion ¶
¶ with feathers on his arms ¶ ¶ and a sweet-ass manly beard
Right from year one ¶ ¶ his mother called him
Stratos ¶ ¶ his dad called him collect ¶
¶ after never coming home from a beer run ¶
¶ each cloud is a confidant ¶ >> get...Off...My...Mountain!
[ laughs ] there! Light the fuse.
[ fuse sizzling ] "once I'm a safe distance away"
Is the rest of that sentence! My arm! It's stuck!
>> me too! It's "127 hours," man.
We're franco-ed. We're franco-ed!
>> we're not cutting off our arms, jackass.
Someone will find us. >> yeah, but if we wait too
Long, we won't have the strength to chew through the bone and
Tendon. >> yeah, let's have a little
Less "beast" and a little more "man."
[ yawns ] son of a bitch!
He-- wait, he's a hero. He did this for me.
He sacrificed his arm so I wouldn't have to.
[ whimpers ] oh, that stratos douche was
Right. The spirit of the mountain --
Wait, hey, I have tear ducts? Well, nothing to do but wait for
Beast-man to bring help. >> where's skeletor?
>> [ farts ] >> [ groans ]
Sometimes you are too much beast.
>> ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶
¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ¶
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
>> how did you know that would work?
>> I didn't. >> oh...
[ smooching ] >> ugh, that is vile!