1
00:00:01,770 --> 00:00:02,729
Let me explain.

2
00:00:03,064 --> 00:00:06,675
Turk and Carla's marriage was in trouble
because of some dumb stuff Turk had done,

3
00:00:06,910 --> 00:00:09,804
So last night, I took Carla
out to smooth things over.

4
00:00:11,139 --> 00:00:13,534
Long story short, we smooched.

5
00:00:15,294 --> 00:00:17,587
Sorry.
Drunken accident.

6
00:00:18,222 --> 00:00:21,896
It was barely more than a friend kiss,
so we decided not to tell Turk.

7
00:00:23,281 --> 00:00:24,274
Or so I thought.

8
00:00:25,070 --> 00:00:26,713
J.D. And I kissed.

9
00:00:27,548 --> 00:00:29,158
Was it a comfortable silence?

10
00:00:29,193 --> 00:00:31,320
No. And I'm not going to be
the one who breaks it.

11
00:00:31,355 --> 00:00:34,020
Unfortunately, I had one of Rowdy's hairs caught in my throat.

12
00:00:34,055 --> 00:00:35,058
Uh-oh.

13
00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:40,538
I guess there's a lot of things
that can knock you on your ass.

14
00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:46,296
Like, for instance, when your
17-year-old neighbor doesn't see
you as a smoking hottie anymore.

15
00:00:46,403 --> 00:00:47,809
Oh. Pedro?

16
00:00:49,393 --> 00:00:51,413
I can't seem to find my pencil.

17
00:00:51,748 --> 00:00:53,844
Do you have any idea where it might be?

18
00:00:55,679 --> 00:00:57,509
Oh, it's right there between
your bosoms... ma'am.

19
00:00:57,844 --> 00:00:58,455
"Ma'am"?

20
00:00:59,090 --> 00:01:02,049
Y-you just ma'amed your way out of
me ever buying you beer again.

21
00:01:03,184 --> 00:01:04,273
"Ma'am"?

22
00:01:08,307 --> 00:01:11,796
And of course, the one thing you can
always count on to knock you on your ass...

23
00:01:13,824 --> 00:01:14,901
Floor wax.

24
00:01:15,936 --> 00:01:16,707
Uncanny.

25
00:01:17,742 --> 00:01:19,202
Dr. Kelso, while I got you here,

26
00:01:19,437 --> 00:01:22,035
I need to discuss a hospital matter of grave importance.

27
00:01:22,070 --> 00:01:22,697
What is it?

28
00:01:23,132 --> 00:01:24,612
I'm not happy with my uniform.

29
00:01:24,947 --> 00:01:28,862
ah, new janitor uniforms, top priority.

30
00:01:28,897 --> 00:01:32,673
Right up there with silk jamies for the patients and a cat door for the I.C.U.

31
00:01:33,208 --> 00:01:34,340
I made some sketches.

32
00:01:35,475 --> 00:01:36,758
This one has a cape!

33
00:01:36,793 --> 00:01:38,708
Well, it gives me the option of fighting crime.

34
00:01:39,343 --> 00:01:40,777
Yeah, after work, of course.

35
00:01:41,412 --> 00:01:44,317
Now, this one...
has sort of a medieval thing going.

36
00:01:44,852 --> 00:01:46,240
That's you on a horse?

37
00:01:46,275 --> 00:01:47,639
This is a steed, sir.

38
00:01:48,574 --> 00:01:50,419
That's for cleanup in outer space.

39
00:01:51,354 --> 00:01:55,233
This one is...outer space...evening wear.

40
00:01:55,668 --> 00:01:56,898
This one's just a kangaroo.

41
00:01:58,033 --> 00:01:59,402
Sometimes I draw kangaroos.

42
00:01:59,637 --> 00:02:06,014
You know, I could look at the demented crayon sketchings of a madman all day, but I got a hospital to run.

43
00:02:06,549 --> 00:02:08,313
Did you wax over there yet?

44
00:02:08,648 --> 00:02:09,524
No, sir.

45
00:02:13,459 --> 00:02:17,894
I'll get a new uniform, or I'll wax everything in your world.

46
00:02:20,214 --> 00:02:21,755
Oh, hey there. Wait till you get a load of this.

47
00:02:21,790 --> 00:02:23,781
They're giving me a teaching award tonight,

48
00:02:23,781 --> 00:02:28,448
so io gonna need you to go ahead
and holster up the twins, since you'll
be playin' the role of arm candy.

49
00:02:28,486 --> 00:02:29,831
Yeah, I'm not going.

50
00:02:29,866 --> 00:02:34,690
If I wanna hear someone go on and
on about how great you are, I'll
just listen to you during sex.

51
00:02:34,725 --> 00:02:38,397
I'm hearing the hate, but I'm
not seing the hate. You...

52
00:02:41,523 --> 00:02:42,397
Oh, my god.

53
00:02:42,432 --> 00:02:45,551
Did you botox your face into
an expressionless mask?

54
00:02:45,986 --> 00:02:48,021
Pedro called me "ma'am."

55
00:02:48,094 --> 00:02:50,130
Oh, damn it, Jordan, come on.

56
00:02:50,314 --> 00:02:54,725
Now, you know, I'm generally ok with you
puting any poison you want into your body.

57
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,847
But this is the first time I've ever won anything.

58
00:02:57,382 --> 00:02:58,264
It's not that bad.

59
00:02:58,299 --> 00:02:59,504
Really!

60
00:02:59,539 --> 00:03:00,498
Show me...

61
00:03:00,533 --> 00:03:01,390
happy.

62
00:03:03,025 --> 00:03:03,821
Sad.

63
00:03:05,306 --> 00:03:06,000
Silly.

64
00:03:06,894 --> 00:03:09,766
Amused. B-mused. C-mused.

65
00:03:10,301 --> 00:03:11,835
Show me...angry.

66
00:03:15,181 --> 00:03:16,556
You got angry down.

67
00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:23,111
Subtitles by
Elanouil and Raceman

68
00:03:24,340 --> 00:03:28,030
Scrubs episode 4x22
My big move

69
00:03:28,030 --> 00:03:29,833
www.forom.com

70
00:03:31,627 --> 00:03:33,642
When we got to work, not
a whole lot had changed.

71
00:03:33,877 --> 00:03:35,351
The silence was killing me.

72
00:03:35,386 --> 00:03:36,755
You kissed my wife.

73
00:03:37,090 --> 00:03:38,628
I miss the silence.

74
00:03:38,963 --> 00:03:40,256
Did you like it?

75
00:03:40,391 --> 00:03:42,101
Well, it's kind of a trick question, Turk.

76
00:03:42,136 --> 00:03:44,434
I mean, if I say yes, it's like I'm sayin',

77
00:03:44,469 --> 00:03:47,249
"damn, dude, your wife is hot, and
I'd like to get me some of that."

78
00:03:47,284 --> 00:03:49,165
But if I say no, then I'm all like,

79
00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,312
"yo, I know she's your wife, but you
can keep that fish-lipped bitty."

80
00:03:54,247 --> 00:03:56,184
How about you, Carla?
Did you like it?

81
00:03:56,219 --> 00:03:58,107
No! His lips are chappy.

82
00:03:58,642 --> 00:04:00,665
I can't use lip balm. I always end up eating it.

83
00:04:00,900 --> 00:04:02,811
When I was little, I used
to spread it on crackers.

84
00:04:04,146 --> 00:04:05,826
Well, if it isn't the happy couple.

85
00:04:06,361 --> 00:04:07,512
Oh, and Turk's here, too!

86
00:04:08,647 --> 00:04:10,958
Ok. Are we not laughing about this yet?

87
00:04:11,493 --> 00:04:14,529
Turk, look, I'm so sorry, but
you have to believe me.

88
00:04:14,564 --> 00:04:15,695
It was barely anything.

89
00:04:15,730 --> 00:04:19,155
It was barely even a kiss, dude. It was like
an accidental lip bump, like, "oops."

90
00:04:20,790 --> 00:04:21,900
Don't even look at her.

91
00:04:21,935 --> 00:04:23,554
Sit on the floor!

92
00:04:23,989 --> 00:04:24,631
Sitting.

93
00:04:24,966 --> 00:04:27,202
Fine.
I'll show you with Elliot.

94
00:04:32,331 --> 00:04:34,022
Something wonderful is happening.

95
00:04:35,555 --> 00:04:37,738
I don't understand why you're
butting in all my patients,

96
00:04:37,738 --> 00:04:40,357
you know, outside of your usual
arrogance and god complex.

97
00:04:40,392 --> 00:04:41,454
I don't know what you're talkin' about.

98
00:04:41,489 --> 00:04:42,045
Kiss my ring.

99
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:46,098
However, if you'd like to know
about why I'm "butting in,"

100
00:04:46,633 --> 00:04:49,035
it's because your young
patient Lindsay here,

101
00:04:49,070 --> 00:04:52,497
when she was 10 years old, I'm the
one who diagnosed her with epilepsy.

102
00:04:52,497 --> 00:04:57,082
And now that her medication is no
longer controlling her seizures,
I'd like to know what's going on.

103
00:04:57,082 --> 00:05:00,706
Besides, over the years, Lindsay and
I have developed quite a rapport.

104
00:05:03,713 --> 00:05:04,763
Hey. Lindsay.

105
00:05:05,225 --> 00:05:06,665
What's up, girlfriend?

106
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,283
See?

107
00:05:10,318 --> 00:05:11,036
Rapport.

108
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:17,097
The damn janitor waxed the counter!

109
00:05:17,832 --> 00:05:18,975
Give me that phone.

110
00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:22,636
It doesn't have to be like this.

111
00:05:23,571 --> 00:05:24,243
I know.

112
00:05:26,078 --> 00:05:26,529
Here.

113
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:34,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

114
00:05:35,792 --> 00:05:36,626
It's beautiful.

115
00:05:37,621 --> 00:05:39,774
Uh, you don't have to put it on today, b-but--

116
00:05:41,193 --> 00:05:42,816
Hey, we're kinda in the middle of something here!

117
00:05:42,851 --> 00:05:44,600
This'll just take a second.

118
00:05:51,210 --> 00:05:51,995
Nice, huh?

119
00:05:54,978 --> 00:05:56,530
Who gets a tattoo of a mop?

120
00:05:57,529 --> 00:05:59,551
- Can I get up? My butt is asleep.
- No!

121
00:06:00,086 --> 00:06:04,740
Turk...you know how I was so upset because
you started calling your ex-girlfriend?

122
00:06:04,975 --> 00:06:07,903
I just couldn't understand how a
married person could slip up like that.

123
00:06:08,838 --> 00:06:09,907
Now I do.

124
00:06:11,242 --> 00:06:12,169
I'm so sorry.

125
00:06:13,204 --> 00:06:14,172
Me, too, buddy.

126
00:06:15,107 --> 00:06:19,009
Guys...as insane as this may sound,
I'm actually gonna be ok with this.

127
00:06:19,744 --> 00:06:20,939
Just do me a favor.

128
00:06:21,374 --> 00:06:22,581
No more apologies.

129
00:06:22,665 --> 00:06:23,988
And no more explanations.

130
00:06:24,023 --> 00:06:28,467
And for the love of god, honey, no more
girl-on-girl kissing demonstrations.

131
00:06:30,281 --> 00:06:31,948
Something horrible has happened.

132
00:06:33,947 --> 00:06:35,332
I'll tell you why Lindsay's seizures are back.

133
00:06:35,367 --> 00:06:37,483
Her blood work shows her dilantin is at zero.

134
00:06:37,518 --> 00:06:38,429
She's not takin' her medicine.

135
00:06:38,464 --> 00:06:38,851
What?!

136
00:06:39,186 --> 00:06:41,083
I'm gonna give that girl a serious talking to.

137
00:06:41,318 --> 00:06:44,604
With all due respect, Dr. Cox,
maybe I should talk to her.

138
00:06:44,939 --> 00:06:47,859
With no due respect whatsoever, why?

139
00:06:47,894 --> 00:06:50,435
Well, she's a teenage girl.
That's an awkward time.

140
00:06:50,435 --> 00:06:54,366
You know, your breasts are growing...
not always symmetrically.

141
00:06:54,687 --> 00:06:56,835
Um, you like boys. Maybe
one gives you a ride home.

142
00:06:56,835 --> 00:06:58,864
You think something's gonna
happen, but it doesn't,

143
00:06:58,864 --> 00:07:01,067
and that just makes it official
that you're a lopsided freak!

144
00:07:02,191 --> 00:07:04,424
Happy ending, though--
lefty caught up in college.

145
00:07:04,459 --> 00:07:05,509
Barbie!
Yeah.

146
00:07:05,544 --> 00:07:07,691
I have a finite amount of brain space,

147
00:07:07,726 --> 00:07:12,196
and your inspiring story of the little
breast who couldn't just pushed out

148
00:07:12,196 --> 00:07:16,332
my memory of the 1980 olympic
hockey team's victory at lake placid.

149
00:07:16,558 --> 00:07:17,455
Miracle on ice...

150
00:07:18,276 --> 00:07:19,383
Gone.

151
00:07:19,418 --> 00:07:20,366
Listen to me carefully.

152
00:07:20,601 --> 00:07:24,286
I know all about what it's
like to be a teenage girl.

153
00:07:26,030 --> 00:07:26,594
Of course,

154
00:07:27,029 --> 00:07:30,624
I never had to try to convince my mother
that I sure would've liked a naval ring.

155
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:33,271
Oh, well, we were all going to
jamaica, and my friend Susie--

156
00:07:38,565 --> 00:07:39,400
Brain space.

157
00:07:44,225 --> 00:07:44,851
Turk.

158
00:07:45,386 --> 00:07:49,351
You've been so awesome, but we still need
you to know how innocent the kiss was.

159
00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:51,220
Guys, it's cool. Don't even worry about it.

160
00:07:51,255 --> 00:07:52,633
Just watch, buddy.

161
00:07:55,150 --> 00:07:55,606
See?

162
00:08:06,170 --> 00:08:07,867
Get your hands off my woman!

163
00:08:13,103 --> 00:08:17,773
I think you separated my shoulder. The pain is excruciating.

164
00:08:19,423 --> 00:08:20,212
Whaaaat?

165
00:08:23,439 --> 00:08:24,839
Looking good, janitor.

166
00:08:25,274 --> 00:08:27,218
Well, thank you, petite lady.

167
00:08:27,658 --> 00:08:30,119
Wow! That color really brings out your package.

168
00:08:30,454 --> 00:08:33,010
Thank you... supposedly straight surgeon.

169
00:08:33,645 --> 00:08:34,503
It's a good day.

170
00:08:35,438 --> 00:08:36,132
Hey, buddy!

171
00:08:36,267 --> 00:08:38,520
That's a great suit!

172
00:08:40,218 --> 00:08:41,482
Don't bust the new uni.

173
00:08:42,227 --> 00:08:43,251
Little boy blue!

174
00:08:43,702 --> 00:08:44,673
Blow your horn.

175
00:08:45,452 --> 00:08:46,213
He didn't stop.

176
00:08:47,898 --> 00:08:48,402
Stop.

177
00:08:48,937 --> 00:08:51,089
This hallway's closed. You have
to find another way around.

178
00:08:51,124 --> 00:08:52,891
Whatever. You got somethin' here, though.

179
00:08:54,739 --> 00:08:55,379
What's that?

180
00:08:55,414 --> 00:08:59,363
I don't know. You look so cute in your little
blue outfit, I wanted to give you a tickle.

181
00:09:01,360 --> 00:09:03,824
All right, what the hell is goin' on?

182
00:09:05,743 --> 00:09:08,000
Feel free to take notes.
All right there, blossom.

183
00:09:08,435 --> 00:09:09,485
Here's the hot gossip.

184
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:12,470
You're having seizures again because
you're not taking your medication.

185
00:09:12,470 --> 00:09:15,175
If this continues, you will be dead.

186
00:09:15,474 --> 00:09:19,384
And I'm not talking about the
"oh, my god, if I don't get invited to the
prom, I'm going to die" type of dead.

187
00:09:19,384 --> 00:09:22,806
I'm talking dead dead. Is that clear enough
for you? Because if it's not, I...

188
00:09:23,092 --> 00:09:27,014
could, of course, "text" you on my
blackberry or my blueberry
or my Chuck Berry,

189
00:09:27,014 --> 00:09:29,449
although technically,
Chuck Berry is a blackberry.

190
00:09:29,743 --> 00:09:34,123
The point is, you gotta stop wasting
everybody's time and grow up. Is
that clear to you, sweetheart?

191
00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:36,087
Yes, Dr. Cox.

192
00:09:36,122 --> 00:09:37,426
That a girl

193
00:09:37,661 --> 00:09:39,883
Barbie? You're free to kiss my ring.

194
00:09:41,218 --> 00:09:43,052
It's nice when things get back to normal.

195
00:09:43,587 --> 00:09:44,065
Hey, guys.

196
00:09:44,100 --> 00:09:45,285
Hey, Carla.
Hey.

197
00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:47,310
You gotta try these sweet
potato fries. They're amazing.

198
00:09:47,345 --> 00:09:48,357
Put some ketchup on it.

199
00:09:48,392 --> 00:09:49,887
You got it.

200
00:10:09,550 --> 00:10:12,486
Like I said before, small things
can knock you on your ass.

201
00:10:14,003 --> 00:10:16,694
Whether it's realizing that
nobody's afraid of you anymore...

202
00:10:18,810 --> 00:10:20,046
Good lord!

203
00:10:21,941 --> 00:10:25,419
Or find out that you have no idea
how to deal with a teenage girl.

204
00:10:26,942 --> 00:10:27,701
Nice work.

205
00:10:31,147 --> 00:10:33,692
The important thing is to not
make a scene in the cafeteria.

206
00:10:33,727 --> 00:10:34,756
Want another one?

207
00:10:35,393 --> 00:10:35,857
Turk!

208
00:10:35,892 --> 00:10:36,276
What?!

209
00:10:36,311 --> 00:10:38,321
What? Were you gonna eat that?

210
00:10:38,356 --> 00:10:39,112
How about this--

211
00:10:39,147 --> 00:10:40,891
Let's all have fries, huh?

212
00:10:40,926 --> 00:10:43,131
Let's all have fries!

213
00:10:43,666 --> 00:10:44,628
You want fries?!

214
00:10:44,663 --> 00:10:46,147
Turk, you said you were ok!

215
00:10:46,182 --> 00:10:46,829
My fries!

216
00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:49,609
Well, apparently I'm not ok, am I, Carla?

217
00:10:49,644 --> 00:10:50,829
Apparently, I'm not!

218
00:10:50,864 --> 00:10:53,209
You know why? Because
kisses just don't happen.

219
00:10:53,244 --> 00:10:53,940
They don't.

220
00:10:54,375 --> 00:10:56,707
Now, this is somebody's fault,
and I wanna know whose.

221
00:11:01,521 --> 00:11:02,262
Forget fries!

222
00:11:07,477 --> 00:11:08,914
Admittedly, I lost my cool here.

223
00:11:08,949 --> 00:11:11,643
- No, Turk, it's understandable.
- No! Why would you--

224
00:11:11,678 --> 00:11:15,532
I'm sorry... but the only way I'm
gonna have closure here is if
I can blame one of you guys.

225
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:17,840
I just gotta figure out who.

226
00:11:21,525 --> 00:11:24,174
Don't worry, this will all
be fine, you know Turk.

227
00:11:24,366 --> 00:11:24,833
I mean...

228
00:11:25,168 --> 00:11:27,989
Whoever he blames will get the
silent treatment for a couple days,

229
00:11:27,989 --> 00:11:30,675
then he'll make snarky
comments for a few months,

230
00:11:30,675 --> 00:11:32,895
and then sooner or later, he'll be
laughing about the whole thing.

231
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,322
It's just like the time I slept
with his family's cleaning lady.

232
00:11:35,357 --> 00:11:37,104
Ohh! You slept with Toonie?

233
00:11:37,139 --> 00:11:41,179
I was staying in their guest room,
and she was buffing the nightstand,
and she just kept on buffin'.

234
00:11:41,214 --> 00:11:43,183
But, hey, thanks for
takin' the hit on this one.

235
00:11:43,218 --> 00:11:44,844
Me?!
Nuh-uh. Nuh-uh.

236
00:11:44,879 --> 00:11:49,298
You're his best friend. All you have
to do is say, "I'm sorry," high-five him,
and go, "aaahhh!"

237
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:51,276
But all you have to do is have sex
with him, and he'll forgive you.

238
00:11:51,276 --> 00:11:53,176
If I have sex with him,
he'll probably end up madder.

239
00:11:53,183 --> 00:11:53,747
You know what?

240
00:11:53,782 --> 00:11:55,074
Let's not play into his blame game.

241
00:11:56,109 --> 00:11:56,725
Agreed.

242
00:11:58,747 --> 00:12:02,420
Turk, she was pourin' drinks into me,
and she knows I put out when I'm drunk.

243
00:12:04,514 --> 00:12:05,986
He took me to a bar.

244
00:12:10,210 --> 00:12:12,151
I didn't ask him to walk me home!

245
00:12:13,898 --> 00:12:16,858
I'm tellin' you, dude, she was
all over me like ants on candy.

246
00:12:17,293 --> 00:12:18,897
You think you're talkin' to Turk, don't you?

247
00:12:19,532 --> 00:12:20,183
Idiot.

248
00:12:22,619 --> 00:12:25,847
Look, Lindsay, I'm... real
sorry if I upset you before.

249
00:12:25,847 --> 00:12:30,223
I truly am. I probably should've asked you
why you stopped taking your medication,

250
00:12:30,223 --> 00:12:31,962
and to be honest with you, I was...

251
00:12:32,016 --> 00:12:34,734
I was hoping you'd be able to give me
the answer to that one right about now.

252
00:12:38,479 --> 00:12:45,883
So, Lindsay, it must be kinda cool having
the same name as that Lindsay lohan.

253
00:12:46,218 --> 00:12:48,241
Gosh, she's supercool.

254
00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:54,479
Just between you, me and the I.V.,
Guess I've probably seen confession
of a teenage drama queen,

255
00:12:54,479 --> 00:12:57,524
oh, I don't know, 3, 4...5, 6...  7, 8, 9 times.

256
00:12:58,209 --> 00:12:59,111
What a film.

257
00:13:03,966 --> 00:13:04,655
that girl...

258
00:13:04,990 --> 00:13:06,567
That girl is a robot.

259
00:13:06,602 --> 00:13:08,900
I spent 3 hours in there and got goose egg.

260
00:13:08,935 --> 00:13:14,186
It's so odd that she didn't respond
to you because you know so
much about teenage girls.

261
00:13:14,321 --> 00:13:15,432
All right, look. Barbie...

262
00:13:15,667 --> 00:13:20,113
I'm about to say 4 words that I've never
said to you before, that I'll never say again.

263
00:13:21,648 --> 00:13:23,101
Go on, get outta here.

264
00:13:25,236 --> 00:13:27,400
I need...your help.

265
00:13:27,935 --> 00:13:30,258
Fine. But I have 3 rules.

266
00:13:30,293 --> 00:13:32,436
One--when we're in the
room, you say nothing.

267
00:13:32,471 --> 00:13:34,842
2--I get to say whatever I want about you.

268
00:13:34,877 --> 00:13:38,302
And 3--if you break rule one or 2,
I get to boing your curls.

269
00:13:38,337 --> 00:13:40,697
What the hell does "boing" mean?

270
00:13:42,832 --> 00:13:44,499
Boing.

271
00:13:47,823 --> 00:13:49,417
Oh, god, this is gonna kill me.

272
00:13:52,908 --> 00:13:55,929
All right, just put on your mean
face, and order shall be restored.

273
00:14:03,450 --> 00:14:04,460
Hi. Nut.

274
00:14:07,584 --> 00:14:09,239
What?!
Don't even know you.

275
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:19,627
Yeah, yeah.
Happy birthday.

276
00:14:23,339 --> 00:14:24,698
You gave me a cursed uniform.

277
00:14:25,497 --> 00:14:27,765
It's not cursed. It's simply psychology.

278
00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:31,123
I chose robin's-egg blue because
it has a calming effect on people

279
00:14:31,123 --> 00:14:33,368
and I knew it would be
the thorn in your paw.

280
00:14:33,803 --> 00:14:35,581
Other colors evoke different reactions.

281
00:14:35,616 --> 00:14:39,613
For example, bright orange has
been found to provoke hostility.

282
00:14:40,348 --> 00:14:44,052
Dr. Kelso, I want to thank
you again for the tie.

283
00:14:44,587 --> 00:14:45,667
Fist five!

284
00:14:49,397 --> 00:14:51,097
It's the third time today!

285
00:14:55,489 --> 00:14:58,510
Ohhh...please don't make me
go to this banquet tonight.

286
00:14:58,745 --> 00:15:01,222
Jordan, this award came from my interns,

287
00:15:01,222 --> 00:15:03,624
so I think the least you can do
is show up and support me.

288
00:15:07,402 --> 00:15:09,708
And just like that, it was time for the moment of truth.

289
00:15:10,749 --> 00:15:12,010
- Hey, Turk.
- Hey Turk.

290
00:15:12,692 --> 00:15:13,577
What's up, J.D.?

291
00:15:15,130 --> 00:15:16,605
The silent treatment.

292
00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:17,650
Be gracious.

293
00:15:17,685 --> 00:15:19,101
I got 3 words for ya--

294
00:15:19,136 --> 00:15:20,024
"sucks to be..."

295
00:15:20,059 --> 00:15:20,907
adding a fourth--

296
00:15:20,942 --> 00:15:21,539
"you."

297
00:15:27,321 --> 00:15:31,026
After sharing a quick victory dance
with Roland, the heavy-set orderly,

298
00:15:31,026 --> 00:15:33,864
who, coincidentally, was
my victory dancer coach...

299
00:15:33,989 --> 00:15:35,429
- Pop the hips.
- Ok.

300
00:15:35,464 --> 00:15:36,253
Pop the hips, J.D.

301
00:15:36,588 --> 00:15:38,094
Thanks, roland.
One day I'll get it.

302
00:15:38,129 --> 00:15:38,914
I doubt it.

303
00:15:39,649 --> 00:15:41,924
...I got to thinking about relationships...

304
00:15:42,707 --> 00:15:44,158
about how people fall in love...

305
00:15:47,706 --> 00:15:48,904
have kids...

306
00:15:50,339 --> 00:15:51,755
grow old together...

307
00:15:53,390 --> 00:15:54,716
and say good-bye.

308
00:15:57,035 --> 00:15:59,123
And then, for some reason,
I thought about the circus.

309
00:16:00,758 --> 00:16:03,029
But then I was back on relationships.

310
00:16:04,089 --> 00:16:07,797
Back to your room, Mr. Johnson.
You got one ventricule.

311
00:16:08,077 --> 00:16:11,553
And I couldn't help thinking that maybe it
wasn't luck that made relationships last.

312
00:16:11,588 --> 00:16:14,007
Maybe it was just a matter
of who takes fewer hits.

313
00:16:14,943 --> 00:16:18,607
You don't have to talk to me. Just wave
if you're gonna give me a ride home.

314
00:16:21,072 --> 00:16:24,176
And I realized I should've been the
one to take that hit, not Carla.

315
00:16:28,548 --> 00:16:29,421
Hey, Lindsay.

316
00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:32,566
Oh. Don't worry. He's not allowed to talk.

317
00:16:33,334 --> 00:16:34,469
Is that true?

318
00:16:35,705 --> 00:16:36,970
You may nod.

319
00:16:41,380 --> 00:16:44,512
You know, Lindsay, when I
was 15, I cut my own bangs.

320
00:16:45,247 --> 00:16:48,032
Oh, that's right, Percival,
it's a high school hair story.

321
00:16:50,649 --> 00:16:54,357
Anyway, Judy Keenan told me that
she would also cut her hair off.

322
00:16:54,357 --> 00:16:56,534
It was like a suicide pact, only with bangs.

323
00:16:56,869 --> 00:16:59,808
I cut off my hair, and
of course, she backed out.

324
00:16:59,808 --> 00:17:03,372
But even though my bangs looked
horrible, I kept them that way,

325
00:17:03,372 --> 00:17:05,204
mostly because those stupid bangs were

326
00:17:05,205 --> 00:17:07,999
the only thing in my life
that I felt I had control over.

327
00:17:08,378 --> 00:17:09,080
You know?

328
00:17:10,188 --> 00:17:12,851
I'm so tired of everyone
telling me what to do--

329
00:17:12,886 --> 00:17:15,954
when to be home, what to wear,
when to take my medicine.

330
00:17:15,989 --> 00:17:18,037
I mean, I'm the one who's sick. Right?

331
00:17:18,472 --> 00:17:20,078
I can handle my own life.

332
00:17:20,889 --> 00:17:24,817
How about I tell your parents that from now
on the prescriptions for your medicine
will be given directly to you.

333
00:17:24,852 --> 00:17:27,965
You'll be in charge of getting
your dilantin, taking it...everything.

334
00:17:28,883 --> 00:17:29,671
Thank you.

335
00:17:29,906 --> 00:17:30,803
Great.

336
00:17:32,990 --> 00:17:35,389
I don't have a ring, but you can kiss my ass.

337
00:17:35,987 --> 00:17:37,186
Feared in gray...

338
00:17:37,921 --> 00:17:39,055
beautiful in blue.

339
00:17:40,590 --> 00:17:41,767
Feared in gray...

340
00:17:42,641 --> 00:17:43,666
beautiful in blue.

341
00:17:43,701 --> 00:17:45,302
I'm gonna grab a fry...

342
00:17:45,337 --> 00:17:46,523
some ketchup.

343
00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:49,056
Ahh. It's cold.

344
00:17:51,555 --> 00:17:52,316
That's it.

345
00:18:01,431 --> 00:18:02,274
I'm back.

346
00:18:03,501 --> 00:18:04,625
That was weird.

347
00:18:15,648 --> 00:18:17,648
No. That was weird.

348
00:18:18,546 --> 00:18:19,336
What are you doin'?

349
00:18:19,371 --> 00:18:20,451
That's all it was.

350
00:18:20,486 --> 00:18:23,910
And if you still need someone to blame,
why don't you try blaming yourself?

351
00:18:27,012 --> 00:18:28,210
You're absolutely right.

352
00:18:28,245 --> 00:18:29,642
It's my fault you kissed my wife.

353
00:18:31,677 --> 00:18:33,824
Oh, man!
I'm goin' home.

354
00:18:33,859 --> 00:18:35,129
Dude, who do you think you're talkin' to?

355
00:18:35,129 --> 00:18:36,666
You think you're the
world's greatest husband?

356
00:18:36,701 --> 00:18:38,285
Please. I was there when you were

357
00:18:38,286 --> 00:18:40,647
flirting with your ex-girlfriend and
neglected to tell her you were married.

358
00:18:40,682 --> 00:18:43,831
I was there when you tried to hook
up with that waitress the day
before you got engaged.

359
00:18:43,866 --> 00:18:47,997
And I was definitely there when you
hooked up with that nasty-ass stripper
at boobies, boobies, boobies.

360
00:18:48,032 --> 00:18:49,161
That wasn't me.
That was you.

361
00:18:49,196 --> 00:18:50,680
I know, but I told her my name was Turk.

362
00:18:50,938 --> 00:18:53,165
Look, the point is, think
of the millions of times

363
00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:55,336
you've chosen not to hang
out with your wife 'cause

364
00:18:55,337 --> 00:18:56,462
you were tryin' to hang out with me.

365
00:18:56,497 --> 00:19:01,371
You know, maybe it's time you started acting like a real husband instead of actin' like some sort of crazy...

366
00:19:02,059 --> 00:19:02,739
cowboy.

367
00:19:03,169 --> 00:19:03,831
A cowboy?

368
00:19:03,866 --> 00:19:05,122
I don't know.
It just came to me.

369
00:19:06,021 --> 00:19:06,948
You know I'm right, Turk.

370
00:19:11,945 --> 00:19:14,827
When your pride's at stake, you
can't help but have questions.

371
00:19:15,562 --> 00:19:18,489
Just tell me. How did you know
what was bothering her?

372
00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:21,242
Tell me now so that we don't
have to talk anymore. Ever.

373
00:19:22,177 --> 00:19:25,991
How is it that no man understands that
every woman, whether she's 16 or 60,

374
00:19:25,991 --> 00:19:31,100
still has that awkward, insecure,
self-conscious teenage girl inside of her?

375
00:19:31,535 --> 00:19:34,096
A lot of the time, the
answer is about sacrifice.

376
00:19:37,890 --> 00:19:38,493
Hey.

377
00:19:40,171 --> 00:19:41,499
Look, I was thinkin' maybe...

378
00:19:42,305 --> 00:19:43,982
maybe you'd rather just stay in tonight...

379
00:19:44,443 --> 00:19:45,941
you know, have some pizza, watch...

380
00:19:46,244 --> 00:19:47,765
watch some movies. What do you say?

381
00:19:50,674 --> 00:19:52,025
Are you...are you tryin' to smile?

382
00:19:54,062 --> 00:19:55,320
You're so damn cute.

383
00:19:56,306 --> 00:20:00,333
Sometimes sacrifice is only wearing your
new uni when you're not at work.

384
00:20:00,368 --> 00:20:01,314
Ok, how about this one?

385
00:20:01,649 --> 00:20:05,157
3 blue jays fly into a bar. They say,
"we just wanna wet our beaks"

386
00:20:07,111 --> 00:20:09,070
No? Sorry, Dan. You tell one.

387
00:20:10,358 --> 00:20:13,466
Other times, it's about
swallowing that damn pride.

388
00:20:15,367 --> 00:20:19,070
J.D., Would you hand me the wine,
please? Turk's not talkin' to me.

389
00:20:28,063 --> 00:20:30,990
But ultimately, big or
small, sacrifice is about

390
00:20:30,991 --> 00:20:32,669
doin' something you
really don't want to do.

391
00:20:34,561 --> 00:20:37,005
Hey, guys, I know we
talked about this before, but...

392
00:20:37,586 --> 00:20:38,352
I'm movin' out.

393
00:20:39,202 --> 00:20:40,222
Really?

394
00:20:40,563 --> 00:20:42,246
Yeah. You guys need your space.

395
00:20:42,990 --> 00:20:44,555
Wow. Thanks, man.

396
00:20:45,331 --> 00:20:46,664
You're gonna miss me, though.

397
00:20:47,787 --> 00:20:49,452
Hey, you could turn his room into a gym.

398
00:20:50,484 --> 00:20:52,926
We ain't puttin' no gym in my media room.

399
00:20:53,161 --> 00:20:54,212
Whose media room?

400
00:20:54,747 --> 00:20:56,680
Our media room.

401
00:20:56,715 --> 00:20:58,907
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

402
00:20:59,305 --> 00:21:05,919
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