1 00:00:00,765 --> 00:00:02,320 (alarm beeps) (lucy) I finally figured out 2 00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:04,707 The key to getting everything done at medical school-- 3 00:00:04,707 --> 00:00:10,351 Do a bunch of thgs at once and never sleep. Hey, dad. Don't have a lot of time for our daily update, 4 00:00:10,351 --> 00:00:13,691 But here goes-- school's hard, dorm's gross, 5 00:00:13,691 --> 00:00:16,686 Not really dating, but I am having my lady needs 6 00:00:16,686 --> 00:00:19,072 Tended to by a handsome young stallion. 7 00:00:19,072 --> 00:00:19,886 (laughs) 8 00:00:20,708 --> 00:00:22,281 Wow. Just remembered who I'm talking to. 9 00:00:22,629 --> 00:00:24,884 Sorry, dad. But since it's out there, 10 00:00:24,884 --> 00:00:26,703 Hot damn, I am in the middle 11 00:00:26,703 --> 00:00:29,727 Of a real sexual awakening right now. Hmm? 12 00:00:30,254 --> 00:00:32,266 Yeah, that's about enough for me today, too. 13 00:00:32,471 --> 00:00:33,163 Talk to you tomorrow. 14 00:00:34,239 --> 00:00:36,132 Baby, what's up? It's 5:30. 15 00:00:36,133 --> 00:00:38,515 I have 9,000 things to do. Go back to sleep. 16 00:00:38,515 --> 00:00:40,862 Girl, once you wake up the troops, 17 00:00:40,862 --> 00:00:42,660 You gotta storm the beach. 18 00:00:42,660 --> 00:00:46,008 You know what? You are actually on my "to-do" list. 19 00:00:49,806 --> 00:00:51,024 Yeah. 20 00:00:52,117 --> 00:00:54,652 The iliohypogastric and ilioinguinal nerves 21 00:00:54,653 --> 00:00:56,153 Innervate the groin region. 22 00:00:56,154 --> 00:00:57,756 God, I'm great at study-walking. 23 00:00:59,958 --> 00:01:01,251 Oh, good. Dr. Turk. 24 00:01:01,251 --> 00:01:03,615 I scanned those slides for your lung lecture. 25 00:01:03,615 --> 00:01:05,278 I e-mailed them to you. Did you get a chance to check 'em? 26 00:01:05,278 --> 00:01:08,629 He's gone, lucy. He's gone. 27 00:01:08,629 --> 00:01:10,569 Yesterday was dr. Dorian's last day. 28 00:01:10,569 --> 00:01:12,848 Dr. Turk was taking it pretty hard. 29 00:01:20,510 --> 00:01:22,789 He done gone to zion. 30 00:01:24,852 --> 00:01:25,488 What? 31 00:01:26,940 --> 00:01:27,431 Hey, turk. 32 00:01:28,571 --> 00:01:30,113 Okay, this is why pregnancy sucks. 33 00:01:30,113 --> 00:01:32,189 Your stupid name took my head right to "turkey," because I 34 00:01:32,189 --> 00:01:34,551 Have been craving the hell out of thanksgiving food all week. 35 00:01:34,551 --> 00:01:37,375 This morning I actually pounded a jar of cranberry sauce 36 00:01:37,375 --> 00:01:38,236 And me dry stuffing. 37 00:01:38,236 --> 00:01:42,398 It was like a holiday, only much, much sadder. You want to talk about sad-- 38 00:01:42,398 --> 00:01:45,489 I spent the whole morning moping around 'cause j.D. Wasn't here. 39 00:01:45,489 --> 00:01:49,345 It took me about an hour to get out of it. Oh, he said to say he misses you. 40 00:01:50,774 --> 00:01:51,245 He did? 41 00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:51,696 Yeah. 42 00:01:53,963 --> 00:01:56,798 (exhales deeply) 43 00:01:56,799 --> 00:01:58,333 It's okay. It's okay. 44 00:01:58,334 --> 00:02:01,003 He reacted the same way when he got your muffin basket. 45 00:02:01,004 --> 00:02:03,416 Look, turk, I know that you're hurting, but you're gonna find 46 00:02:03,416 --> 00:02:04,883 Someone else here to ride the eagle with. 47 00:02:04,883 --> 00:02:07,526 Elliot, you don't ride the eagle. You eagle. 48 00:02:07,526 --> 00:02:10,679 You choose "toe or thumb?" you join "fight club with pillows." 49 00:02:10,679 --> 00:02:13,980 You and j.D. Had a pillow fight club? The first rule of pillow fight club--you don't talk-- 50 00:02:13,980 --> 00:02:15,550 Yeah, I get it. No, I don't think you do. Elliot. 51 00:02:15,550 --> 00:02:17,994 Elliot, please don't say anything. Hey, turkleton. 52 00:02:18,785 --> 00:02:20,322 I know what it's like to lose a friend. 53 00:02:20,571 --> 00:02:22,539 I lost my good buddy steve back in korea. 54 00:02:22,924 --> 00:02:26,633 Sir, that was a horrible war. Yes, it was, but I'm talking about 55 00:02:26,633 --> 00:02:28,934 A family trip we tookto the '88. 56 00:02:28,934 --> 00:02:31,433 I suggested a wife swap to steve, 57 00:02:31,433 --> 00:02:33,675 And things got pretty weird. 58 00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:36,238 Yes, it was an amazing night, 59 00:02:36,238 --> 00:02:39,551 But was it worth it to lose a good friend over? 60 00:02:40,166 --> 00:02:40,943 Probably. 61 00:02:44,708 --> 00:02:46,175 Great effort in the sack last night. 62 00:02:46,175 --> 00:02:48,702 Just remember, when I say, "I hate you. Don't touch me," 63 00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:50,734 It's not about you. It's about all men. 64 00:02:50,734 --> 00:02:52,909 Cool. Crap, I'm a be late for class. 65 00:02:52,909 --> 00:02:54,925 Drew, wait. There's something I have to tell you-- 66 00:02:56,452 --> 00:02:57,239 I'm late, too. 67 00:02:58,878 --> 00:02:59,771 You missed your... 68 00:02:59,771 --> 00:03:00,359 Yeah. 69 00:03:02,882 --> 00:03:03,712 Oh, my god. 70 00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:05,780 (laughs) 71 00:03:06,046 --> 00:03:08,810 I'm kidding. Your face looks so dumb right now. 72 00:03:08,810 --> 00:03:11,032 Why would you do that to me? I'm bored. 73 00:03:11,032 --> 00:03:13,336 You're lucky I vibe on crazy. 74 00:03:13,336 --> 00:03:17,471 I hate you. Don't touch me. Fair enough. 75 00:03:19,771 --> 00:03:22,236 At patients with pancreatic disorders. 76 00:03:22,236 --> 00:03:22,937 Shh. 77 00:03:24,150 --> 00:03:25,839 Hey, drew. Glad you could make it. 78 00:03:26,924 --> 00:03:30,247 Sorry I'm late. You should be sorry as I'm giving all of you murderers 79 00:03:30,247 --> 00:03:33,397 The honor of shadowing me today. There is no penalty forthcoming, 80 00:03:33,397 --> 00:03:35,365 However, as it is an optional exercise. 81 00:03:35,365 --> 00:03:38,269 Optional? Hey, man, I gotta cruise. 82 00:03:38,269 --> 00:03:39,806 Bunch of crap to do. You--you cool here? 83 00:03:39,806 --> 00:03:41,833 Now just a second. You're leaving? 84 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:43,876 Well, what the heck am I supposed to do? 85 00:03:43,876 --> 00:03:46,209 How will the hospital get by, for god sake? 86 00:03:46,209 --> 00:03:48,084 (mutters) shut it down. (electricity powers down) 87 00:03:48,084 --> 00:03:50,869 Everyone, shut it down. It's over. (machine beeping erratically) 88 00:03:50,869 --> 00:03:55,220 Stop saving lives. (laughs) man, you crack me up. 89 00:03:55,220 --> 00:03:56,416 Ugh. (electricity powers up) 90 00:03:57,259 --> 00:03:58,671 Uh, but for reals, I tta split. 91 00:03:58,671 --> 00:03:59,824 I met this old cat upstairs 92 00:03:59,824 --> 00:04:01,855 Who's got really painful glaucoma. 93 00:04:01,855 --> 00:04:05,357 (singsongy) translation-- crazy-ass government product. 94 00:04:06,106 --> 00:04:06,970 (normal voice) yeah, we'll probably hang out, 95 00:04:06,970 --> 00:04:08,541 Maybe watch some "benson" reruns. 96 00:04:08,541 --> 00:04:11,451 You know what I'm saying? Yeah, you know what I'm saying. 97 00:04:13,596 --> 00:04:16,916 Number one, remind me again why I can't kill him. 98 00:04:16,916 --> 00:04:19,144 His daddy built the hospital. Fair enough. 99 00:04:19,916 --> 00:04:21,338 All of you remain where you are for a moment. 100 00:04:21,969 --> 00:04:23,189 I'm going to punch through a wall. 101 00:04:23,189 --> 00:04:25,648 (thud) 102 00:04:26,193 --> 00:04:27,521 Maureen, I e-mailed you 103 00:04:27,521 --> 00:04:29,211 Your bachelorette pictures this morning. 104 00:04:29,211 --> 00:04:30,922 I would have put them in the regular mail, 105 00:04:30,922 --> 00:04:32,640 But I think we could get arrested. 106 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,898 Okay, class, I want to thank ms. Bennett 107 00:04:34,898 --> 00:04:37,707 For her help on this presentation. Thank you! 108 00:04:37,707 --> 00:04:41,596 Not really a stand-and-wave moment. Here we go. 109 00:04:41,596 --> 00:04:43,510 What do you mean they're not the bachelorette photos? 110 00:04:43,510 --> 00:04:44,874 All right, people, we'll start 111 00:04:44,874 --> 00:04:48,122 With advanced mesothelioma of the lung. (click) 112 00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:49,776 (students laugh) 113 00:04:51,266 --> 00:04:53,234 Now that's not a lung. Dr. Turk, please-- 114 00:04:53,234 --> 00:04:57,043 No, lucy, I think this could be what we call a teachable moment. 115 00:04:57,043 --> 00:04:58,658 Next up should be 116 00:04:59,264 --> 00:05:00,438 Pulmonary fibrosis. 117 00:05:00,438 --> 00:05:01,862 (students laugh) 118 00:05:02,741 --> 00:05:04,130 That ain't pulmonary fibrosis. 119 00:05:04,130 --> 00:05:05,794 That's a woman nibbling on some panties. 120 00:05:06,672 --> 00:05:10,597 (click) looks like the night took a dark turn, people. 121 00:05:10,597 --> 00:05:13,264 Let's see what's next. Oh, she's back! 122 00:05:13,264 --> 00:05:14,898 Back in action! (click) 123 00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,585 Oh! (man) ooh. 124 00:05:17,566 --> 00:05:19,976 You can't do stuff like that to strangers, woman. 125 00:05:19,976 --> 00:05:22,041 It's not right. Know. I'm sorry. 126 00:05:22,041 --> 00:05:23,812 He's a human being, lucy. 127 00:05:23,812 --> 00:05:28,059 He got 9 bucks, okay? I made it rain. Move on. 128 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:36,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 129 00:05:48,178 --> 00:05:48,639 You all right? 130 00:05:48,639 --> 00:05:52,255 It was a rough surgerydon't think the guy's gonna make it. 131 00:05:52,255 --> 00:05:53,925 Oh, that stinks. 132 00:05:53,925 --> 00:05:56,377 Yeah. This is when I really miss j.D. 133 00:05:56,377 --> 00:05:59,549 You know, at work, he'd see me like this 134 00:05:59,549 --> 00:06:00,796 And then try and pick me up. 135 00:06:00,796 --> 00:06:03,209 Then I'd point to that doctor over there and I'd say, 136 00:06:03,209 --> 00:06:07,234 "who does that look like to you?" and he'd say... Who? 137 00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,934 A japanese laura dern. How do you not see that? 138 00:06:10,758 --> 00:06:12,178 I can't believe you get to see j.D. Naked. 139 00:06:13,015 --> 00:06:14,840 That was weird. 140 00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:17,361 That's okay. That's okay, turk. 141 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:21,442 I can do this with you. See that nurse over there? 142 00:06:21,442 --> 00:06:23,307 She looks like a mexican carrie scott. 143 00:06:23,307 --> 00:06:24,369 Who? 144 00:06:24,369 --> 00:06:25,991 Childhood friend. 145 00:06:25,991 --> 00:06:28,951 Yeah, she, uh, joined a cult and disappeared when she was 16. 146 00:06:28,951 --> 00:06:32,151 Oh, my god. That could actually be her if she got really tan. 147 00:06:32,151 --> 00:06:34,827 Carrie! Carrie scott! 148 00:06:34,827 --> 00:06:36,332 No, not her. 149 00:06:36,332 --> 00:06:37,935 Police are right. She's probably dead. 150 00:06:37,935 --> 00:06:40,008 What were we talking about? I don't remember. 151 00:06:41,170 --> 00:06:43,171 This morning was such a disaster. 152 00:06:43,172 --> 00:06:46,174 Maybe my problem is that I've been trying to do too much. 153 00:06:46,175 --> 00:06:48,977 Mm, I decided to do some optional shadowing of dr. Cox 154 00:06:48,978 --> 00:06:52,013 To get my mind off it. Dr. Cox, may I ask you a question? 155 00:06:52,014 --> 00:06:54,349 Do you see that shadow? 156 00:06:54,350 --> 00:06:56,770 Over there? Do you see how it's just quietly standing 157 00:06:56,770 --> 00:06:58,894 Against the wall, not askingnane questions 158 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,600 That make me crave the sweet taste a hollow-point bullet? 159 00:07:02,227 --> 00:07:04,765 That's you-- a dumb, quiet shadow. 160 00:07:05,970 --> 00:07:08,772 Act like it. You know why you should ignore him? 161 00:07:08,773 --> 00:07:09,579 Let's just forget for a second 162 00:07:09,579 --> 00:07:13,368 That you sprained your wrist punching a wall. Oh, I can explain that. I hate someone. 163 00:07:13,795 --> 00:07:15,318 Miss simmo' platelets are low, 164 00:07:15,318 --> 00:07:19,805 So I don't really think heparin's a good idea. I'd never met dr. Reid, but she seemed incredible. 165 00:07:20,104 --> 00:07:22,132 She went toe-to-toe with dr. Cox. 166 00:07:22,132 --> 00:07:24,679 But the bottom line is-- I admitted her, so she's mine. 167 00:07:24,679 --> 00:07:26,430 Fair enough. She's yours. 168 00:07:26,430 --> 00:07:29,358 Thank you. Hmm. 169 00:07:29,393 --> 00:07:31,447 She was amazing with her patients... 170 00:07:31,448 --> 00:07:34,450 You're gonna be just fine, kate. We'll get the blood work back 171 00:07:34,451 --> 00:07:36,319 And then run a simple test called a bronchoscopy. 172 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:38,254 She was a loving wife... 173 00:07:38,255 --> 00:07:40,089 J.D., what's wrong? 174 00:07:40,090 --> 00:07:43,559 Yes, sweetie, turk misses you, too. 175 00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:44,861 What? 176 00:07:44,862 --> 00:07:47,296 I don't--he's wearing scru. 177 00:07:47,297 --> 00:07:48,965 His green ones. 178 00:07:48,966 --> 00:07:51,534 And she did it all while being pregnant. 179 00:07:51,535 --> 00:07:54,003 Can you hand me that bedpan? Thank you. 180 00:07:54,004 --> 00:07:55,738 (vomits and coughs) 181 00:07:55,739 --> 00:07:59,275 Oh, yeah. Much better. Take that. Who are you 182 00:07:59,276 --> 00:08:01,144 And why are you following me around and staring at me? 183 00:08:01,145 --> 00:08:04,647 I'm lucy. I'm a med student. Be cool, lucy. Be cool. 184 00:08:04,648 --> 00:08:07,917 And I just have to say, you have the spirit of a noble warrior, 185 00:08:07,918 --> 00:08:10,720 Which is not to say that you're not incredibly feminine, 186 00:08:10,721 --> 00:08:12,221 Because clearly you are. 187 00:08:12,222 --> 00:08:14,891 I mean, you're, like, stupid, frickin' pregnant, 188 00:08:14,892 --> 00:08:16,392 But also so skinny. 189 00:08:16,393 --> 00:08:20,129 I mean, come on. You're like a snake that ate a tiny horse. 190 00:08:20,130 --> 00:08:23,966 (laughs) my point is, I'd like to get to know you better. 191 00:08:23,967 --> 00:08:26,769 Oh, so you're crazy. Oh, yeah. 192 00:08:26,770 --> 00:08:28,668 Oh, that's cool. I'm dr. Elliot reid. See you later. 193 00:08:28,843 --> 00:08:31,378 Who's got food? Mama needs a refill! I'm dying here! 194 00:08:31,714 --> 00:08:34,849 All right, class, we're looking for evidence Of disease or abnormality. 195 00:08:34,849 --> 00:08:37,791 Hey, dr. T. I heard one time they opened up a dude's stomach, 196 00:08:37,791 --> 00:08:39,193 And there was a finger inside of it. 197 00:08:39,193 --> 00:08:40,595 I mean, think about it. You're in a lab, 198 00:08:40,595 --> 00:08:42,280 You're a little buzzed, everything's cool. 199 00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:44,405 Then all of a sudden your dead guy's flipping you the bird 200 00:08:44,405 --> 00:08:46,533 With another dude's finger. I mean, what?! 201 00:08:48,316 --> 00:08:50,116 Denise, could you please handle this? I've had a really bad day. 202 00:08:50,916 --> 00:08:51,503 I'd love to. 203 00:08:52,661 --> 00:08:54,766 So... You and me? 204 00:08:55,653 --> 00:08:57,057 We're gonna have a stupid jar. 205 00:08:57,582 --> 00:08:59,301 Every time you say something stupid, 206 00:08:59,336 --> 00:09:01,138 We're gonna put a nickel in that jar. 207 00:09:01,138 --> 00:09:03,180 And when that jar gets nice and full, 208 00:09:03,180 --> 00:09:05,665 We're gonna take it and beat you with it. 209 00:09:06,135 --> 00:09:06,853 Okay? 210 00:09:07,643 --> 00:09:08,538 Dude. 211 00:09:09,267 --> 00:09:10,702 How much fun is she in the sack? 212 00:09:10,702 --> 00:09:12,330 More scary than fun. 213 00:09:12,330 --> 00:09:14,249 Look cole, you gotta dial it down a bit. 214 00:09:14,249 --> 00:09:15,758 School newspaper's coming out next week, 215 00:09:15,758 --> 00:09:18,267 And they're publishing class rankings. I thought you were already number one. 216 00:09:18,267 --> 00:09:21,078 That's just with dr. Cox. These are the real rankings. 217 00:09:21,078 --> 00:09:24,018 Everything counts--grades, participation, grunt work. 218 00:09:24,018 --> 00:09:25,272 Everyone sees. Really? 219 00:09:25,272 --> 00:09:30,126 Yeah. Huh. Hey, it's all good. I don't mind if people know my rank. 220 00:09:30,126 --> 00:09:31,837 Okay, it's like going to the gym. 221 00:09:31,837 --> 00:09:34,352 When you blast it as hard as I do, you want people to notice. 222 00:09:34,352 --> 00:09:36,194 How much you think I bench? I don't know, like-- 223 00:09:36,194 --> 00:09:39,227 I don't bench. I do high intensity reps. I'm toned as bal. 224 00:09:39,892 --> 00:09:41,378 What's with the lame writing on your ass? 225 00:09:41,378 --> 00:09:42,888 Is it like a surgeon thing? 226 00:09:42,888 --> 00:09:46,294 No, it's for pork chop day, an old tradition for me and j.D. 227 00:09:46,329 --> 00:09:47,618 We made special pants. 228 00:09:47,618 --> 00:09:49,227 His said "pork" on the back. 229 00:09:49,633 --> 00:09:52,745 That's actually why he had that little sexual harassment thingy. 230 00:09:53,366 --> 00:09:56,337 There's only one left. Do you mind? No, that's all you. I don't even like pork chops. 231 00:09:56,337 --> 00:09:59,590 Hey, look. There's j.D. Where? Where? Did he wear his pants? 232 00:10:00,153 --> 00:10:02,072 Sucka. I lied. I love 'em. 233 00:10:04,465 --> 00:10:06,135 You're a pork chop keyser soze. 234 00:10:07,569 --> 00:10:10,159 Can you believe that? Oh, I do. The chops are awesome. 235 00:10:10,159 --> 00:10:12,722 I pounded down 11 of 'em already, gristle and all. 236 00:10:12,722 --> 00:10:15,828 And I'm a vegetarian, but the baby--carnivore. 237 00:10:16,359 --> 00:10:16,866 Hey, turk. 238 00:10:18,307 --> 00:10:20,711 (sniffs) mmm, it's like christmas morning. 239 00:10:22,596 --> 00:10:24,631 You want to help me get her back? This is what we do-- 240 00:10:24,631 --> 00:10:26,711 We fill her car up with pork chops, and when she opens 241 00:10:26,711 --> 00:10:29,083 The door, the pork chops will slide all over the place, 242 00:10:29,083 --> 00:10:30,410 And she'll have to dig a little seat. 243 00:10:30,937 --> 00:10:34,348 I'm talking about a major inconvenience. Okay, you're losing it. 244 00:10:34,348 --> 00:10:36,060 We need to get you a new work buddy, like, today. 245 00:10:36,060 --> 00:10:39,216 Until then, you gotta just chillax, my brother. 246 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:42,809 Okay, I cannot pull off "my brother," can I? No. 247 00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:46,183 At least I nailed "chillax." No, you didn't. 248 00:10:46,995 --> 00:10:49,264 Dr. Reid, you're so inspiring. Oh, stop. 249 00:10:50,060 --> 00:10:50,725 Go on. 250 00:10:50,925 --> 00:10:52,556 You're totally the kind of doctor I want to be 251 00:10:52,591 --> 00:10:56,666 When I get super old. Compliment took a bit of a left turn there. 252 00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:59,605 I just don't think you realize how awesome it is 253 00:10:59,605 --> 00:11:01,613 For me to see a woman actually doing it, you know? 254 00:11:01,769 --> 00:11:03,047 I just don't think you realize you're a great doctor, 255 00:11:03,047 --> 00:11:05,465 And you've got your life together. You're handling both. 256 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,834 Me--I've got nine texts this minute. 257 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:10,825 My boyfriend needs me, my dad wants his daily phone call, 258 00:11:10,825 --> 00:11:12,021 My sister maureen is 259 00:11:12,021 --> 00:11:13,656 Freaking out about her bachelorette party. 260 00:11:13,656 --> 00:11:15,662 She has to have sex with her fiancé for the first time 261 00:11:15,662 --> 00:11:18,466 In case the stripper got her pregnant--long story. Oh, sure, sure. 262 00:11:18,466 --> 00:11:21,674 Plus, with all the studying and the schoolwork and-- lucy, you can do it. 263 00:11:21,674 --> 00:11:23,140 You just need to learn how to prioritize. 264 00:11:24,804 --> 00:11:26,863 Uh-oh. (voice breaks) I've been so emotional lately, 265 00:11:26,863 --> 00:11:29,360 And I just pictured you as my little sister, 266 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:31,713 And I'm starting... To lose it. 267 00:11:31,713 --> 00:11:33,342 Quick. Say something to remind me of how crazy you are. 268 00:11:33,342 --> 00:11:35,709 Um... I ran out of underwear today, 269 00:11:35,709 --> 00:11:39,190 So I wore my bathing suit. Huh. Thanks. All better. 270 00:11:41,448 --> 00:11:43,907 Hey, so you and me got off on the wrong foot. 271 00:11:43,907 --> 00:11:46,924 Nobody's fault. I mean, you put two alpha dogs in a cage, 272 00:11:46,924 --> 00:11:49,437 And there's bound be some barking, right? Woof! Woof! 273 00:11:49,437 --> 00:11:52,657 Yes. Yes, we are exactly alike indeed. 274 00:11:52,657 --> 00:11:56,004 See, you get it. Anyway, I just wanted to talk about my ranking 275 00:11:56,004 --> 00:11:57,351 Before the newsletter comes out. 276 00:11:57,351 --> 00:11:59,371 Spoiler alert-- you're last. 277 00:11:59,371 --> 00:12:00,480 Hey, dr. Cox, please. 278 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,889 If my dad reads I'm at the bottom, 279 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,317 He might lose it and cut me off. 280 00:12:04,317 --> 00:12:06,557 Okay, I know I don't act like it sometimes, 281 00:12:06,557 --> 00:12:10,652 But I really do want to be a doctor. Son, that is the first honest thing you've ever said to me. 282 00:12:10,652 --> 00:12:12,233 Yeah, you know what it's like 283 00:12:12,233 --> 00:12:14,449 To have a miserable, judgmental bastard for a dad? 284 00:12:14,449 --> 00:12:17,670 No. My father was so super sweet thaty entire childhood was 285 00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:21,047 An endless parade of lollipops and hugs. Of course I do. 286 00:12:21,047 --> 00:12:22,906 Look, I can't just move you up in the rankings 287 00:12:22,906 --> 00:12:24,476 Based on nothing, so for the next week, 288 00:12:24,476 --> 00:12:26,269 If I need something done, I'll go to you. 289 00:12:26,269 --> 00:12:28,467 -We'll call it "extra credit." -Great. 290 00:12:28,467 --> 00:12:31,676 In fact, go to bed 12. There is a very, very large sick man 291 00:12:31,676 --> 00:12:35,648 There who needs an alcohol bath all over his entire body. Thank you for the opportunity. 292 00:12:37,630 --> 00:12:39,687 So did he buy the whole newsletter rankings nonsense? 293 00:12:39,687 --> 00:12:42,494 Like an elderly shut-in talking to a telemarketer. 294 00:12:42,494 --> 00:12:43,967 Outstanding. (mutters) 295 00:12:44,605 --> 00:12:45,604 Thank you for meeting me. 296 00:12:45,604 --> 00:12:47,944 So basically I'm looking for a work friend, 297 00:12:47,944 --> 00:12:49,897 Someone to pal around with at the hospital. 298 00:12:49,897 --> 00:12:52,686 I am so ready to take this relationship to the next level, 299 00:12:52,686 --> 00:12:56,007 You know, mentally, physically and emotionally. 300 00:12:56,007 --> 00:12:58,328 I'm sorry, did you just say "physically"? 301 00:12:58,328 --> 00:13:00,103 Weird five. Get there. 302 00:13:01,911 --> 00:13:04,621 If you were on a desert island, what three cds would you bring? 303 00:13:04,621 --> 00:13:05,850 Motorhead, metallica 304 00:13:05,850 --> 00:13:07,328 And the original cast recording of "wicked." 305 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:11,256 I stage-managed the, uh, midwestern leg of the '05 tour. 306 00:13:11,256 --> 00:13:13,244 And, yes, kristin chenoweth is a delight. (laughs) 307 00:13:13,244 --> 00:13:15,744 Why am I here again? 308 00:13:15,744 --> 00:13:18,369 How's the food? This soup is amazing. 309 00:13:18,369 --> 00:13:21,514 Shut up, frank. We are lucky enough to dine 310 00:13:21,515 --> 00:13:24,050 With an educated physician, and you order soup? 311 00:13:24,051 --> 00:13:27,020 I'm sorry, dr. Turk. I'll send him back for a sandwich, 312 00:13:27,021 --> 00:13:30,723 Something more fitting. Talking about soup. 313 00:13:30,724 --> 00:13:33,159 (slurps) 314 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,329 How you doing,ate? I'm a little nervous. 315 00:13:35,329 --> 00:13:38,865 Is a bronchoscopy gonna hurt? There'll be a little discomfort afterwards, 316 00:13:38,866 --> 00:13:39,936 But you'll be under for the procedure, 317 00:13:39,936 --> 00:13:42,644 And the whole thing will be over in an hour. And you'll be here when I wake up? 318 00:13:42,644 --> 00:13:47,387 Yeah, of course. Isn't she the best? 319 00:13:47,387 --> 00:13:50,398 I think we're all searching for something. 320 00:13:50,398 --> 00:13:53,567 Sometimes it's a replacement for the irreplaceable... 321 00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:56,029 Lookit, gandhi, if you expect me to go all the way, 322 00:13:56,029 --> 00:13:58,631 You gotta step up your game a little bit here, pal. 323 00:13:58,631 --> 00:14:00,954 Maybe take me out to a nice dinner, 324 00:14:00,954 --> 00:14:03,897 Introduce me to some of your friends. You're not taking this seriously, are you? 325 00:14:03,897 --> 00:14:07,576 Not even a little, and not just because I want nothing to do 326 00:14:07,576 --> 00:14:10,472 With dorian's sloppy seconds. Work sucks. 327 00:14:10,472 --> 00:14:13,721 You, however, have been lucky enough to have worked 328 00:14:13,721 --> 00:14:15,493 With your very best friend for eight years. 329 00:14:15,493 --> 00:14:18,083 That will never, ever happen again. 330 00:14:19,571 --> 00:14:21,974 Other times it's just a hard-to-reach spot 331 00:14:21,974 --> 00:14:23,045 On a fat guy's back. 332 00:14:23,045 --> 00:14:23,756 (groans) 333 00:14:23,756 --> 00:14:25,976 Oh, no. 334 00:14:25,976 --> 00:14:27,738 Dude, a little help? 335 00:14:27,738 --> 00:14:29,009 Oh, isn't it terrible? 336 00:14:29,009 --> 00:14:30,713 Mm, awful. Mm. 337 00:14:30,713 --> 00:14:31,980 (groans) 338 00:14:33,387 --> 00:14:35,630 So ms. Simmons is gonna wake up in a while. 339 00:14:35,630 --> 00:14:37,497 Can I hang out with you while you sit with her? 340 00:14:37,497 --> 00:14:40,662 Lucky for me, I found what I was looking for... 341 00:14:40,662 --> 00:14:42,507 Please. I'm going home. 342 00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:45,956 And she was a lying, selfish jerk. 343 00:14:47,989 --> 00:14:50,748 Morning, sunshine. You look rested. 344 00:14:50,748 --> 00:14:52,612 Wow, and making time for the paper, too. 345 00:14:52,612 --> 00:14:55,217 That must be nice. Later, you munch. 346 00:14:55,922 --> 00:14:57,483 Did she just call me "buttmunch"? 347 00:14:57,483 --> 00:14:59,567 Well, she didn't use the word "butt," though I can't think 348 00:14:59,567 --> 00:15:01,471 Of any other prominent type of "munch." so, yeah, I think 349 00:15:01,471 --> 00:15:03,226 She called you a "buttmunch." I'm drew, by the way. 350 00:15:05,053 --> 00:15:07,802 So I said to the lady, "where can a well-hung marine 351 00:15:07,802 --> 00:15:10,060 Buy a pair of shoes around here?" (laughs) 352 00:15:10,060 --> 00:15:11,838 (laughs) I don't even know what that is. 353 00:15:13,461 --> 00:15:15,385 Turkleton, those days are gone. 354 00:15:15,385 --> 00:15:17,765 Dr. Kelso, really? Please tell me 355 00:15:17,765 --> 00:15:19,723 You're not another one of dr. Turk's gentleman suitors. 356 00:15:19,723 --> 00:15:23,294 I am indeed. I think it will be great to have a black friend 357 00:15:23,294 --> 00:15:24,613 To help me out with the sisters. 358 00:15:24,613 --> 00:15:28,610 Get my swirl on. That's what I'm talkin' 'bout. Mm! 359 00:15:28,610 --> 00:15:30,477 Holy crap. That totally looks like a korean helen hunt. 360 00:15:30,477 --> 00:15:32,660 No, that's a japanese laura dern. 361 00:15:32,660 --> 00:15:35,375 No, it's not. I'm gonna get my picture with her. 362 00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:36,661 Oh, yeah? Ah? 363 00:15:36,661 --> 00:15:39,667 Well--well, tell her I loved her inapanese "jurassic park"! 364 00:15:39,667 --> 00:15:42,185 Hey, you came here with me. Why you talking to her? 365 00:15:42,185 --> 00:15:44,544 No, I'm still here with you. (mutters) what the hell am I doing? 366 00:15:44,544 --> 00:15:46,950 I always end up in relationships like this. 367 00:15:46,950 --> 00:15:49,125 For once, get out with some dignity, bob. 368 00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:51,236 Don't ever call me again. 369 00:15:53,371 --> 00:15:54,567 No, it's okay. 370 00:15:55,884 --> 00:15:57,113 Hey, crazy swimsuit girl. 371 00:15:57,113 --> 00:15:59,433 What are you doing? Volunteering at physical therapy. 372 00:15:59,433 --> 00:16:02,234 I'm stretching mr. Biegel's hamstring. Stop. He'll be fine. 373 00:16:02,234 --> 00:16:04,646 How do you know? He works in the gift shop. 374 00:16:06,276 --> 00:16:08,660 You get what you can get. Please leave. 375 00:16:11,312 --> 00:16:13,503 The baby isn't mine, is it? Get out, kevin. 376 00:16:14,351 --> 00:16:17,558 Question--when you called me "munch," were you referring 377 00:16:17,558 --> 00:16:19,335 To richard belzer's beloved detective character 378 00:16:19,335 --> 00:16:20,509 First established on "homicide" 379 00:16:20,509 --> 00:16:22,317 But best known from "law & order: S.V.U."? 380 00:16:22,317 --> 00:16:24,124 Crime procedurals soothe the baby. 381 00:16:24,771 --> 00:16:26,582 Luckily, there is a different one on every nine seconds. 382 00:16:26,582 --> 00:16:28,790 You walked out on ms. Simmons when she needed you. 383 00:16:28,790 --> 00:16:32,739 I to stay with her all night. She faked out. She did? 384 00:16:33,178 --> 00:16:34,200 Can I get you anything? 385 00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:34,908 (funk music playing) (mouths words) 386 00:16:37,761 --> 00:16:38,934 Yeah. (scoffs) 387 00:16:38,934 --> 00:16:41,225 It got real in there, big-time. 388 00:16:41,225 --> 00:16:44,710 Plus, I got no sleep and I had so much do this morning, 389 00:16:44,710 --> 00:16:46,187 I had to do my dad phone call 390 00:16:46,187 --> 00:16:47,754 While having sex with my boyfriend. 391 00:16:47,754 --> 00:16:50,136 So many things wrong with that, not the least of which 392 00:16:50,136 --> 00:16:53,340 Is the fact that it's the most turned on I've ever been. No filter, huh? 393 00:16:53,340 --> 00:16:55,269 Nope. Lucy, there was a hospital 394 00:16:55,269 --> 00:16:56,565 Full of residents and nurses here last night. 395 00:16:56,565 --> 00:16:58,019 If there was a problem with ms. Simmons, 396 00:16:58,019 --> 00:17:00,770 I would have been called. Stop making excuses. 397 00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:02,968 You know, I thought you could do everything, 398 00:17:02,968 --> 00:17:04,113 But I guess it just seems that way 399 00:17:04,113 --> 00:17:08,508 Because you half-ass it with your patients. (gasps) come with me. 400 00:17:08,998 --> 00:17:11,862 Hey, dr. Cox. I just finished cleaning that guy's foot ulcer. 401 00:17:11,862 --> 00:17:14,617 How'd that go for you? Not gonna lie, I yakked on his face. 402 00:17:14,617 --> 00:17:16,186 Otherwise... (singsongy) crushed it. 403 00:17:16,186 --> 00:17:17,075 (normal voice) what else can I do? 404 00:17:17,075 --> 00:17:19,833 Actually, drew here was about to assist me with something. 405 00:17:19,833 --> 00:17:22,589 Oh, yeah, yeah. No, I got it. What's the job? Sorry, charlie, this is my deal. 406 00:17:22,589 --> 00:17:24,971 No, you know what, drew? Cole's been really stepping up, 407 00:17:24,971 --> 00:17:27,212 Showing some promise. I'm gonna let him do this one. 408 00:17:27,756 --> 00:17:30,738 Room 32. I want you to do a manual rectal disimpactation. 409 00:17:30,738 --> 00:17:34,811 Mr. Hanson is very constipated. 410 00:17:34,811 --> 00:17:36,055 You will fix that... 411 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,396 With your hands. 412 00:17:38,396 --> 00:17:40,660 (whispers) oh, lucky! 413 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,438 (flatly) yay. 414 00:17:45,697 --> 00:17:46,385 "sorry, charlie"? 415 00:17:46,385 --> 00:17:48,029 I thought it was brilliant. Eh. 416 00:17:54,518 --> 00:17:56,194 Mr. Valadez is gonna need another surgery, huh? 417 00:17:56,711 --> 00:18:00,097 Yep. I don't think he's gonna be able to take it. 418 00:18:01,004 --> 00:18:02,197 That totally sucks. 419 00:18:04,892 --> 00:18:05,901 Um... 420 00:18:06,844 --> 00:18:10,681 If you want, uh, today's eileen in radiology's birthday, 421 00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:12,531 And I was gonna go up there and just steal her cake. 422 00:18:13,642 --> 00:18:14,643 I hate eileen in radiology. 423 00:18:15,367 --> 00:18:16,654 I'm definitely in. 424 00:18:16,854 --> 00:18:19,624 She's so nice, it makes me want to cut her throat. I know, right? 425 00:18:19,624 --> 00:18:22,110 I was thinking, after that, maybe we could stop on three 426 00:18:22,110 --> 00:18:24,909 And then I'd show you the nurse that looks like-- looks like nigerian kelly ripa? 427 00:18:24,909 --> 00:18:25,929 Thank you! 428 00:18:27,756 --> 00:18:29,911 Lucy, ms. Simmons needs a new I.V. Placed. 429 00:18:29,911 --> 00:18:32,660 Let's say, uh, you take a shot at it. 430 00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:33,973 Yeah... 431 00:18:34,373 --> 00:18:36,492 I, um... 432 00:18:36,659 --> 00:18:40,523 Your hands are a little shaky there. I'm jacked up on 17 cups of coffee 433 00:18:40,523 --> 00:18:42,910 Because I haven't slept a lot lately and my head is sweating. 434 00:18:43,950 --> 00:18:44,671 But I'll be fine. 435 00:18:46,263 --> 00:18:48,369 (gasps) don't you think you should disinfect the area? 436 00:18:48,369 --> 00:18:50,931 Good catch, kate. What do you think, lucy-- 437 00:18:50,931 --> 00:18:53,248 Should we wipe away all the deadly bacteria 438 00:18:53,248 --> 00:18:55,029 Or just do this civil-war style? 439 00:18:58,194 --> 00:19:00,043 I really shouldn't be doing this. 440 00:19:00,043 --> 00:19:01,273 No, you shouldn't. 441 00:19:01,273 --> 00:19:04,068 (whispers) one second. 442 00:19:06,463 --> 00:19:09,813 Once again, a giant swing and a miss for lucy bennett. 443 00:19:09,813 --> 00:19:11,025 What's wrong with me? 444 00:19:11,460 --> 00:19:13,634 Lucy, when I got pregnant, I learned two things-- 445 00:19:13,950 --> 00:19:15,380 Ketchup on cereal is delicious, 446 00:19:15,673 --> 00:19:17,466 And sometimes you have to be selfish. 447 00:19:18,296 --> 00:19:19,322 That's why I went home last night. 448 00:19:19,322 --> 00:19:21,211 I mean, finally I have something inside me 449 00:19:21,211 --> 00:19:24,078 Forcing me to take care of myself. See, I'm like you. 450 00:19:24,078 --> 00:19:25,103 I probably ended up in medicine 451 00:19:25,103 --> 00:19:27,062 Because I want to try to take care of the whole world. 452 00:19:27,705 --> 00:19:29,616 But here's the crazy thing about being a doctor-- 453 00:19:30,152 --> 00:19:32,198 You can't even take care of one single patient 454 00:19:32,930 --> 00:19:34,614 Unless you learn how to take ce of yourself first. 455 00:19:35,947 --> 00:19:37,451 So tell your dad you can't talk every day, 456 00:19:37,451 --> 00:19:39,367 Have your boyfriend grab a cold shower every once in a while, 457 00:19:39,367 --> 00:19:41,302 Stop doing slides for dr. Turk 458 00:19:41,302 --> 00:19:42,722 And let your sister mess up her own life. 459 00:19:42,722 --> 00:19:44,440 That's the key to being a good doctor-- 460 00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:49,080 You first, then the world. Now go home and get some sleep. 461 00:19:52,915 --> 00:19:55,607 I guess there are lots of ways to get by in a hospital. 462 00:19:55,607 --> 00:19:58,542 You can just try to suck it up... Ugh. 463 00:19:58,542 --> 00:20:01,323 Or find someone to make the day-to-day hell bearable. 464 00:20:01,323 --> 00:20:04,043 (mouth full) mmm. Mmm. (mouth full) mmm. Get the middle. 465 00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:08,480 For me, it was just about learning who comes first. 466 00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:08,890 (cell phone rings) 467 00:20:09,447 --> 00:20:11,269 (beep) 468 00:20:20,542 --> 00:20:22,543 Ahh, snoops! 469 00:20:22,578 --> 00:20:26,314 (singsongy) ole king cole is in the house! 470 00:20:26,348 --> 00:20:27,691 (normal voice) hey, did everybody see the newsletter? 471 00:20:27,691 --> 00:20:28,690 Check it out. 472 00:20:28,690 --> 00:20:32,361 Number one--aaronson, cole. 473 00:20:33,011 --> 00:20:34,838 Isn't that just an alphabetized list 474 00:20:34,838 --> 00:20:36,474 Of all the students in our class? Yep. 475 00:20:36,776 --> 00:20:38,565 You gonna tell him? I haven't decided. 476 00:20:39,152 --> 00:20:41,616 Oh, too bad, bennett, lucy. 477 00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:43,964 (laughs) what happened, suffin? 478 00:20:43,964 --> 00:20:45,495 You're, like, two-thirds of the way down this thing. 479 00:20:45,495 --> 00:20:47,790 That is rough! I don't know, but congratulations. 480 00:20:47,790 --> 00:20:50,738 Yep, old double-a aaronson nailed it again. 481 00:20:50,738 --> 00:20:52,417 You suck, zimmerman! 481 00:20:53,305 --> 00:20:59,888 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org