1 00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:12,054 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪ 2 00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:13,848 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ 3 00:00:13,973 --> 00:00:15,725 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪ 4 00:00:15,850 --> 00:00:18,602 ♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 5 00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,187 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪ 6 00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:22,148 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪ 7 00:00:22,273 --> 00:00:25,317 ♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪ 8 00:00:25,443 --> 00:00:27,111 ♪ Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, Timmy ♪ 9 00:00:27,236 --> 00:00:29,071 ♪ Timmy, Timmy, liv-a-la, Timmy! ♪ 10 00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:32,575 ♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪ 11 00:00:35,745 --> 00:00:37,872 Okay, now, put on the nose, Tweek. 12 00:00:39,874 --> 00:00:42,001 I can't! You do it! - Just stick it on! 13 00:00:42,126 --> 00:00:43,753 But what if I put it in the wrong place? 14 00:00:43,878 --> 00:00:45,254 Just put it between its eyes. 15 00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:46,881 Aah! But what if, while I'm putting on the nose, 16 00:00:47,006 --> 00:00:49,091 the snowman comes to life and tries to kill me? 17 00:00:49,216 --> 00:00:50,468 Tweek, when has that ever happened, 18 00:00:50,593 --> 00:00:52,428 except for that one time? - Yeah! 19 00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,263 Hey, fellas! - Oh, hey, Butters. 20 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,265 How are things going with your new best friend? 21 00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:57,600 Well, Tweek's okay. 22 00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:59,185 But he's certainly no Kenny! - Aah! 23 00:00:59,310 --> 00:01:00,644 Yeah, but he's still better than you, Butters. 24 00:01:00,770 --> 00:01:02,229 Yeah. - Well, that's good. 25 00:01:02,354 --> 00:01:03,731 Good luck being their new friend, Tweek. 26 00:01:03,856 --> 00:01:04,774 Hopefully, you'll do better than me. 27 00:01:04,899 --> 00:01:06,484 See ya, fellas. 28 00:01:06,609 --> 00:01:09,111 Oh, man! That is way too much pressure! 29 00:01:09,236 --> 00:01:11,405 You guys! You guys! You're not gonna believe it! 30 00:01:11,530 --> 00:01:12,740 Uh-oh. 31 00:01:12,865 --> 00:01:14,325 Everything's gonna be okay, you guys! 32 00:01:14,450 --> 00:01:16,077 Life isn't so crappy after all! 33 00:01:16,202 --> 00:01:17,536 It's not?! - No! 34 00:01:17,661 --> 00:01:19,080 I was looking in this magazine, 35 00:01:19,205 --> 00:01:20,790 and I found an ad for little ocean creatures 36 00:01:20,915 --> 00:01:23,042 that you can buy and raise in your room! 37 00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:24,126 No way. 38 00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:25,127 Look! 39 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,587 "Sea-People." 40 00:01:26,712 --> 00:01:28,422 You keep them in a big tank of water, 41 00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:30,966 and they, like, build castles and play basketball and stuff. 42 00:01:31,092 --> 00:01:32,343 Nuh-unh. - Yeah! 43 00:01:32,468 --> 00:01:33,844 And look, they ride around on turtles, 44 00:01:33,969 --> 00:01:35,096 and they play games with fish! 45 00:01:35,221 --> 00:01:37,014 No way. 46 00:01:37,139 --> 00:01:38,808 Okay, Kyle, you're being a Negative Nancy. 47 00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:40,309 Stop it, okay, unless you want everyone 48 00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:42,019 to call you Negative Nancy from now on. 49 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:44,021 Now, what we need is to all chip in $4, 50 00:01:44,146 --> 00:01:45,773 and we can have them here tomorrow. 51 00:01:45,898 --> 00:01:49,777 Only $16? They can't be cool if they're only $16. 52 00:01:53,989 --> 00:01:55,574 If Nancy doesn't want to chip in, 53 00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:57,243 then it will be $5.35 per person. 54 00:01:57,368 --> 00:01:58,577 All right, I'll chip in. 55 00:01:58,702 --> 00:02:00,746 Aah! Me too! - All right. 56 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,792 Butters, don't forget dinner is in two hours! 57 00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:08,087 Okay, Mom. I'm just gonna be up here doing my homework. 58 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:12,967 Yes, by day, he's mild-mannered, sweet, and innocent Butters. 59 00:02:13,092 --> 00:02:14,468 But... 60 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,596 nobody knows he actually has a dark underside... 61 00:02:17,721 --> 00:02:19,348 Professor Chaos! 62 00:02:19,473 --> 00:02:22,476 Ha ha! Time to wreak havoc on the world that shunned me! 63 00:02:27,106 --> 00:02:30,025 [ Chuckling evilly ] 64 00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:31,694 Professor Chaos! 65 00:02:31,819 --> 00:02:33,863 Ah, my faithful companion in world destruction, 66 00:02:33,988 --> 00:02:35,948 General Disarray. - I have done as you asked 67 00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:37,741 and brought the first load of scrap wood. 68 00:02:37,867 --> 00:02:39,243 Excellent, General Disarray. 69 00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:41,120 Now we can begin my most horrible, evil plan yet 70 00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:42,705 to wreak havoc on humanity. 71 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,748 What dastardly deed are we doing now? 72 00:02:44,874 --> 00:02:46,876 Simple, my dear general. 73 00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:49,003 We are going to block out the sun! 74 00:02:49,128 --> 00:02:50,296 Whoa! - Ah, yes! 75 00:02:50,421 --> 00:02:51,797 I have plotted for weeks 76 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:54,133 and figured that if we build a huge wooden shade 77 00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:57,386 80 feet high and 50 feet wide precisely on this hill, 78 00:02:57,511 --> 00:02:59,763 South Park will forever be cast in a great shadow! 79 00:02:59,889 --> 00:03:01,223 Oh, awesome! 80 00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:03,517 Soon, all people will have to live like moles! 81 00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:05,144 They will live only to remember with sorrow 82 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:08,647 how great the sun used to be! [ Laughs evilly ] 83 00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:11,192 Cool, it'll be just like on "The Simpsons." 84 00:03:12,610 --> 00:03:13,694 Huh? - They did that 85 00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:14,987 on "The Simpsons." 86 00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:16,322 I think it was the Mr. Burns character. 87 00:03:16,447 --> 00:03:17,865 He tried to block Springfield from the sun. 88 00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:19,742 He did? Aw, heck! 89 00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,160 I thought I was being original. 90 00:03:21,285 --> 00:03:22,328 So, how do we build it? 91 00:03:22,453 --> 00:03:24,205 Aw, I don't want to do it now, 92 00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:25,956 not if they already did it on "The Simpsons." 93 00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:27,750 I gotta think of something else. 94 00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:30,920 God damn it, how come every time I think of something clever, 95 00:03:31,045 --> 00:03:32,338 "The Simpsons" already did it? 96 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,674 Sea-People... 97 00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:39,386 coming in the mail tomorrow. 98 00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:42,223 [ Echoing ] Yes...yes! 99 00:03:42,348 --> 00:03:45,142 [ Upbeat music plays ] 100 00:03:47,770 --> 00:03:50,272 ♪ Look at me, I'm livin' free ♪ 101 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:52,900 ♪ Free and clean amongst the Sea-People ♪ 102 00:03:53,025 --> 00:03:55,402 ♪ We look for pirates and search for gold ♪ 103 00:03:55,527 --> 00:03:58,113 ♪ Life is an adventure with the Sea-People ♪ 104 00:03:58,239 --> 00:04:00,032 ♪ They don't ever complain, they don't call me fat ♪ 105 00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:03,077 ♪ They don't make me do homework or nothin' like that ♪ 106 00:04:03,202 --> 00:04:05,621 ♪ This is the way life was meant to be ♪ 107 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:10,084 ♪ Laughin' and singin', Sea-People and me ♪ 108 00:04:10,209 --> 00:04:13,587 ♪ Sea-People and me, you guys ♪ 109 00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:18,175 Wow. 110 00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:20,302 Only three more hours, Sea-People -- 111 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,096 Only three more hours, and you can take me away 112 00:04:22,221 --> 00:04:25,015 from this crappy Goddamn planet full of hippies. 113 00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:29,395 Okay, I've added the water purifier tablet 114 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,313 to the Sea-People kingdom tank. 115 00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:33,649 Now it says, "Step two... 116 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,734 Add the Sea-People eggs to the water. 117 00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:38,654 You will see sea life spring instantly." 118 00:04:39,863 --> 00:04:41,323 Okay, let's just run through this one more time. 119 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,741 When the Sea-People arrive, I will welcome them 120 00:04:42,866 --> 00:04:44,326 to South Park as ambassador of Earth. 121 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,287 Tweek, you give them the key to the city, 122 00:04:46,412 --> 00:04:48,122 and we'll all engage them in simple conversation. 123 00:04:48,247 --> 00:04:50,666 We've got to make Sea-People feel comfortable, okay? Ready? 124 00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:52,001 Ready. Let's see 'em. 125 00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:54,837 Hold the sign up, Kyle! 126 00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:57,006 Higher, Kyle! 127 00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:59,300 Okay. 128 00:04:59,425 --> 00:05:01,218 Here we go. 129 00:05:13,314 --> 00:05:15,733 [ Water bubbling ] 130 00:05:15,858 --> 00:05:18,193 Are they playing basketball? 131 00:05:27,453 --> 00:05:30,122 What the fuck is this?! 132 00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:32,458 Hey, these are brine shrimp. I used to feed them to my fish. 133 00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:35,294 I got ripped off! - I told you, Cartman. 134 00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:37,921 Oh, shut up, Kyle! Shut your Goddamn Jew mouth! 135 00:05:38,047 --> 00:05:40,049 You people are why there's war in the Middle East! 136 00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:41,383 And you, Tweek, why don't you learn 137 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:43,010 to button your shirt right for once?! 138 00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:44,345 You're as bad as Stan with his stupid girlfriend, 139 00:05:44,470 --> 00:05:45,554 always spending time with her! 140 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:47,097 God, I hate you guys! 141 00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:48,390 They were supposed to take me away 142 00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:50,142 to their underwater kingdom. 143 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:51,643 They were supposed to take me on adventures of the deep! 144 00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:53,479 They package brine shrimp and sell them to kids? 145 00:05:53,604 --> 00:05:54,772 That's not right, man! 146 00:05:54,897 --> 00:05:55,981 What are we gonna do with them? 147 00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:57,483 Who cares?! Throw 'em away! 148 00:05:57,608 --> 00:05:59,068 Hey, let's pour them in the teacher's coffee 149 00:05:59,193 --> 00:06:01,195 tomorrow morning. - Yeah, that'd be funny! 150 00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:02,696 Heh heh, okay! 151 00:06:06,075 --> 00:06:07,326 [ Indistinct conversations ] 152 00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:09,953 [Ambulance doors close ] 153 00:06:10,079 --> 00:06:12,623 [ Siren wailing ] All right, listen to me. 154 00:06:12,748 --> 00:06:14,541 We must take a strict vow of silence. 155 00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,168 Jesus Christ! We killed her! 156 00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,087 Shh! Tweek! Shut the hell up! 157 00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:21,757 [ Doorbell rings ] 158 00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:24,134 General Disarray, are your parents home? 159 00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:25,969 No. - I've done it, General Disarray! 160 00:06:26,095 --> 00:06:27,554 I've completed my most horrible deed to date! 161 00:06:27,679 --> 00:06:29,264 What? - You know that big statue 162 00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,266 in the town square of pioneer John Wesley Powell? 163 00:06:31,392 --> 00:06:32,684 I snuck over there with a hacksaw, 164 00:06:32,810 --> 00:06:34,019 and I cut off his head! 165 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,270 [ Laughs evilly ] Yeah! 166 00:06:35,396 --> 00:06:36,939 Oh...uh... 167 00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:39,191 They're probably just realizing it now! 168 00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:40,526 Quick! We must turn on the news! 169 00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:42,111 [ TV ] But Hillary Clinton's ass 170 00:06:42,236 --> 00:06:43,529 just keeps getting bigger. 171 00:06:43,654 --> 00:06:45,072 Also in the news tonight, 172 00:06:45,197 --> 00:06:47,074 a vandal has apparently cut off and stolen 173 00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:49,785 the head of the Powell statue in the South Park town square. 174 00:06:49,910 --> 00:06:52,996 Look! Look! I made the news! I've wreaked havoc! 175 00:06:53,122 --> 00:06:54,706 The head was taken in the early morning hours, 176 00:06:54,832 --> 00:06:56,375 and the police have no leads. 177 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,127 I finally made the world sorry! 178 00:06:58,252 --> 00:07:00,629 I brought sadness and chaos! 179 00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,631 This act, of course, reminded us all of the time 180 00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:05,050 that Bart Simpson took the head of the Springfield statue 181 00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:06,802 in one of their classic episodes. 182 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,512 Here's what some people had to say. 183 00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:10,305 "Well, I think whoever took the head 184 00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:12,099 was really just doing an homage to 'The Simpsons. ' 185 00:07:12,224 --> 00:07:13,517 [ Chuckling ] I think it's great!" 186 00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:14,810 "Yes, it really made me reflect 187 00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:16,437 on that episode and laugh." 188 00:07:16,562 --> 00:07:18,272 "Well, 'The Simpsons' is such a great show, 189 00:07:18,397 --> 00:07:20,566 and we need reminders like this to keep us watching." 190 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:24,111 Aw...oh, son of a bitch. 191 00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:26,113 The police say that instead of looking for the missing head, 192 00:07:26,238 --> 00:07:27,781 they'd rather leave it off 193 00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:29,658 and be reminded of 'The Simpsons' every day. 194 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,035 Why didn't you tell me "The Simpsons" already did that? 195 00:07:32,161 --> 00:07:34,329 You seemed so proud. I didn't want to bum you out. 196 00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:36,748 Stupid "Simpsons." 197 00:07:36,874 --> 00:07:38,375 [ Cartoon music plays ] 198 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,377 Hello, there, Phillip! I brought you something! 199 00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:41,712 Ooh, what is it? 200 00:07:41,837 --> 00:07:43,172 [ Farts, laughs ] 201 00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:44,715 See? We're just watching cartoons, like always. 202 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,800 Nothing's changed. - Jesus Christ! She's dead! 203 00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:49,303 Stop it, Tweek! We're pretending like nothing happened. 204 00:07:49,428 --> 00:07:50,888 Phillip, I think I may have accidentally 205 00:07:51,013 --> 00:07:52,556 killed Celine Dion! 206 00:07:52,681 --> 00:07:54,057 [ Gasps ] Killing is never an accident, 207 00:07:54,183 --> 00:07:55,058 you dick face! 208 00:07:55,184 --> 00:07:56,393 [ Farts, laughs ] 209 00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:58,145 Oh, Jesus. Change the channel! 210 00:07:58,270 --> 00:07:59,313 And, in other news, 211 00:07:59,438 --> 00:08:01,023 still no cause of death found 212 00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:03,692 for elementary schoolteacher Diane Choksondik. 213 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:06,195 However, doctors say that during the autopsy, 214 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:09,156 they did find semen in her stomach. 215 00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:10,866 They found the sea men! 216 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:13,076 It's only a matter of time before they find the women, too! 217 00:08:13,202 --> 00:08:14,745 The autopsy is ongoing, 218 00:08:14,870 --> 00:08:16,830 and cause of death has yet to be determined. 219 00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:18,081 Oh, God! - We're dead! 220 00:08:18,207 --> 00:08:19,500 Oh, Jesus! That's it, man! 221 00:08:19,625 --> 00:08:21,084 I want nothing more to do with you guys! 222 00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:22,544 Tweek, where are you going?! 223 00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:23,962 They're gonna find you out, and when they do, 224 00:08:24,087 --> 00:08:25,297 I don't want to be within 50 feet of you! 225 00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:27,090 You're gonna fry, man! - Hey, Tweek, 226 00:08:27,216 --> 00:08:28,383 you're in this just as much as we are! 227 00:08:28,509 --> 00:08:29,801 What?! I told you not to put 228 00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:31,053 the Sea-People in her coffee! 229 00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:32,221 I wasn't even there when you did it! 230 00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:33,430 Yeah, but you're our new friend, 231 00:08:33,555 --> 00:08:35,224 and that makes you co-pee-able. 232 00:08:35,349 --> 00:08:36,892 In fact, it makes you the most responsible. 233 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,560 Tweek, you might have to take the fall on this one. 234 00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:39,937 Aah! 235 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:43,649 [ Crickets chirping ] 236 00:08:43,774 --> 00:08:45,067 [ Doorbell rings ] 237 00:08:45,192 --> 00:08:47,611 Oh, well, hello, there, children! 238 00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:49,154 Chef, we did something kind of bad. 239 00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:50,948 We don't know who else to talk to. 240 00:08:51,073 --> 00:08:53,492 Oh, I'm sure your little cracker problems ain't all that bad. 241 00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,077 Come on in. 242 00:08:55,202 --> 00:08:56,870 Now, just sit down and take a deep breath, 243 00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,914 and tell ol' Chef what's going on. 244 00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:01,250 We need you to promise not to tell anybody. 245 00:09:01,375 --> 00:09:03,961 Now, children, every problem can be worked out. 246 00:09:04,086 --> 00:09:05,587 What was it? 247 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,047 We killed our teacher, 248 00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:09,550 and they found our sea men in her stomach. 249 00:09:09,675 --> 00:09:11,969 Oh, children, that's a problem we all have to face 250 00:09:12,094 --> 00:09:13,804 one time or another. 251 00:09:13,929 --> 00:09:16,765 Here, let me sing you a little song that might cheer you up. 252 00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,725 ♪ Sometimes you kill your teacher ♪ 253 00:09:18,850 --> 00:09:20,936 ♪ And they find your semen in her stomach and the -- ♪ 254 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,437 Wait! What the -- What?! 255 00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:24,856 So, what should we do? 256 00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:38,287 Wow, I guess this really is a big deal. 257 00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:39,955 We've only got one option, you guys. 258 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,039 We're gonna have to go to that hospital 259 00:09:41,164 --> 00:09:42,374 where they're doing the autopsy 260 00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:43,500 and get our sea men back ourselves. 261 00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:45,210 Aah! 262 00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:46,587 I pulled out my hair! 263 00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:48,338 Okay. How about this, Dougie? 264 00:09:48,463 --> 00:09:50,674 I'm going to pose as a real-estate agent 265 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,594 and con everyone in town into buying a monorail, 266 00:09:53,719 --> 00:09:55,554 and then skip town with all their money! 267 00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:58,724 No? - "Simpsons" did it. 268 00:09:58,849 --> 00:10:00,892 They did it in episode 204. 269 00:10:01,018 --> 00:10:02,853 Okay, then I'm gonna start a website 270 00:10:02,978 --> 00:10:05,355 to spread vicious rumors about everyone in town! 271 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:07,691 And then, I'll take -- - "Simpsons" did it. 272 00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,443 I'll bury a skeleton wearing angel wings 273 00:10:09,568 --> 00:10:11,570 so that the townspeople will think a fallen angel has -- 274 00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:12,988 "Simpsons" did it! 275 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,157 [ Crickets chirping ] 276 00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:17,909 This is it. - All right. 277 00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:19,953 Everyone scatter and look for the sea men. 278 00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:21,622 Tweek, stay by the door and keep a lookout. 279 00:10:21,747 --> 00:10:23,332 If you see anybody coming, say the code word... 280 00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:25,125 "Hammertime". - Hammertime?! 281 00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:27,419 Can't the code word just be "look out"? 282 00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:28,879 I won't remember "Hammertime"! 283 00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:30,547 Just remember the song "Can't Touch This," 284 00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:32,007 and you'll remember the code word. 285 00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,759 Yeah, stupid. - Oh, God! 286 00:10:39,473 --> 00:10:41,016 There's nothing here. 287 00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,226 Dude, it's probably still in her stomach. 288 00:10:46,063 --> 00:10:47,272 Is it her? 289 00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:48,231 Yeah, it's Ms. Choksondik, all right. 290 00:10:48,357 --> 00:10:50,067 What do we do now? 291 00:10:50,192 --> 00:10:51,777 Just reach in there and get the sea men out of her stomach. 292 00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:54,696 Oh, God, you guys are such pussies. 293 00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:56,907 [ Squishing ] Huh. 294 00:10:57,032 --> 00:10:58,408 Aah! [ Indistinct conversation ] 295 00:10:58,533 --> 00:10:59,951 You guys! 296 00:11:00,077 --> 00:11:01,036 Ham...Hammer... 297 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,246 I can't remember the code word! 298 00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:06,333 - Can you see the Sea-People? - No, just a bunch of goo. 299 00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:08,210 You guys! Uh... 300 00:11:08,335 --> 00:11:10,170 ♪ Dun dun-dun-dun, dun-dun, dun-dun, can't touch this ♪ 301 00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:11,838 ♪ Dun dun-dun-dun, dun-dun, dun-dun, can't touch this ♪ 302 00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,674 - Ms. Choksondik stinks inside. - Yeah. 303 00:11:13,799 --> 00:11:15,258 ♪ Dun-dun, dun-dun, can't touch this ♪ 304 00:11:15,384 --> 00:11:16,259 ♪ Dun dun-dun-dun, dun-dun, dun-dun ♪ 305 00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,969 Stop. Hammertime! 306 00:11:18,095 --> 00:11:19,721 Aah! - Quick, hide! 307 00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,181 [ Indistinct conversation ] 308 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:25,686 Yeah, well, at least we got Shannon Sharpe back. 309 00:11:25,811 --> 00:11:28,355 [ Squishing ] 310 00:11:30,524 --> 00:11:33,193 All right, let's just leave the semen sample next to the corpse. 311 00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:35,404 I want to run a hair fiber test next. 312 00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:37,698 [ Sniffing ] Hey, do you smell children? 313 00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:39,616 No, that's not... 314 00:11:41,410 --> 00:11:43,286 Got it! - Let's go! 315 00:11:45,831 --> 00:11:47,249 Blagh! Ugh! 316 00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:49,209 [ Coughs ] Uhh! 317 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,585 [ Crickets chirping ] 318 00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:52,254 Bring the World Cup to South Park 319 00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:54,131 so that a huge soccer riot can destroy -- 320 00:11:54,256 --> 00:11:56,258 "Simpsons" did it! "Simpsons" did it! 321 00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,926 Take all the beer cans in South Park 322 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,636 and have them shaken up in a huge mixer 323 00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:01,221 at the paint store, so that they -- 324 00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:04,015 Episode 9F17, entitled "So It's Come to This." 325 00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:07,644 Fine! Then maybe I'll just forget about destroying the town 326 00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:10,605 and just run away and join the circus! 327 00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:12,858 "Simpsons" did it. - Aah! 328 00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:20,115 There, we just put the Sea-People 329 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,450 back in the tank with the others, 330 00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:22,909 and nobody will ever know. 331 00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:24,619 The blood is washed neatly from our hands. 332 00:12:24,745 --> 00:12:26,246 All right, children, 333 00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:28,540 I got you 4 tickets to Thailand and $300 cash. 334 00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,459 It's gonna be tough living for a while. 335 00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:32,002 You might have to do some things for money 336 00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:33,503 you never thought of doing before. 337 00:12:33,628 --> 00:12:34,713 It's all right, Chef, we got our Sea-People 338 00:12:34,838 --> 00:12:36,089 out of the teacher's stomach, 339 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:37,466 and we put them back in their aquarium. 340 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,178 Wait, what? "Sea-People"? 341 00:12:41,303 --> 00:12:43,096 The Sea-People that we put in the teacher's coffee! 342 00:12:43,221 --> 00:12:45,140 Uh, maybe you better start from the beginning. 343 00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:46,725 [ Crickets chirping ] 344 00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:48,310 ...and then we put them back in the tank. 345 00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:50,645 Oh, children, you misunderstood! 346 00:12:50,771 --> 00:12:53,190 Sea-People is different from se-men! 347 00:12:53,315 --> 00:12:54,858 It is? - Yes! 348 00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:56,943 That stuff that was in that vial didn't come from you. 349 00:12:57,068 --> 00:12:58,487 It came from someone else! 350 00:12:58,612 --> 00:13:00,655 I thought you children took turns raping 351 00:13:00,781 --> 00:13:03,825 and then murdered the teacher. [ Chuckling ] 352 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,994 If they found somebody else's sea men in her stomach, 353 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,662 maybe they'll find our Sea-People, too! 354 00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:09,122 Relax, children! 355 00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:10,707 Drinking some brine shrimp can't kill you. 356 00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:13,043 Your teacher must have died from something else. 357 00:13:13,168 --> 00:13:14,211 Oh, really? 358 00:13:14,336 --> 00:13:15,253 [All sigh ] 359 00:13:15,378 --> 00:13:17,589 Aah! I'm so relieved! Aaah! 360 00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:19,591 All right, you children have had a long night. 361 00:13:19,716 --> 00:13:21,343 Why don't we all get some rest? 362 00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:24,012 And on Monday, I'll sing you a song explaining the difference 363 00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:25,597 between semen and Sea-People. 364 00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,682 Come on, children, I'll walk you all home. 365 00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:29,017 Okay, good night, Cartman. 366 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:30,101 Night, guys. 367 00:13:30,227 --> 00:13:31,937 I'm so glad we're not murderers. 368 00:13:34,231 --> 00:13:35,565 Ah, it's so great 369 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:38,318 that everything is finally back to normal. 370 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:43,782 [ Harp plays ] 371 00:13:43,907 --> 00:13:48,620 [ Choir sings ] 372 00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:55,210 You guys! Come quick! 373 00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:56,628 You won't believe it! 374 00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:59,089 Oh, no. What now? 375 00:13:59,214 --> 00:14:01,132 Those sea men from the teacher's stomach 376 00:14:01,258 --> 00:14:02,926 somehow combined with the remaining Sea-People 377 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:06,054 we had left in the tank, and -- Well, look! 378 00:14:07,556 --> 00:14:09,224 Whoa! 379 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,105 How? How did that happen? 380 00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:16,940 I've been up for hours doing some calculations, 381 00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:20,610 and I've come up with my final theory of composite dynamics. 382 00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:22,821 Sea-People plus sea men equals... 383 00:14:22,946 --> 00:14:25,031 SeaCiety. - Whoa. 384 00:14:25,156 --> 00:14:26,324 They've already accomplished so much. 385 00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:27,617 They're like bacteria! 386 00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:29,119 Small organisms live much faster lives 387 00:14:29,244 --> 00:14:30,787 and do things at a much faster rate. 388 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,497 That's right, Tweek, and if my theory is correct, 389 00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,457 all we need is to get more of the two reacting agents, 390 00:14:34,583 --> 00:14:35,542 and we can really see them thrive. 391 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:36,960 Tweek! - Aah! 392 00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:37,961 You go and send away for more Sea-People 393 00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:39,421 from the magazine ad. 394 00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,881 Get at least five gallons of them here, stat! 395 00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:42,299 Stan and Kyle, you go find a bigger fishtank 396 00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:43,466 to put them all in! 397 00:14:43,592 --> 00:14:45,385 What are you gonna do? - Me? 398 00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:48,471 I'm gonna go out on the town and find 10 gallons of sea men. 399 00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:51,641 I have done it, General Disarray. 400 00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:54,269 I've watched all 132 episodes of "The Simpsons" -- twice -- 401 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,062 and I have finally come up with something 402 00:14:56,187 --> 00:14:57,439 that they have never done. 403 00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,608 Behold! This device that I made 404 00:14:59,733 --> 00:15:02,277 will take the cherries out of chocolate-covered cherries 405 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:05,697 and replace the inside instead with two-month-old mayonnaise. 406 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,490 People will think that they are gonna get a bite 407 00:15:07,616 --> 00:15:08,992 of a sweet, delicious cherry, 408 00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:10,785 but instead, they'll get a mouthful 409 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:12,662 of yucky, sticky mayonnaise! 410 00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:15,457 [ Laughing evilly ] 411 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,626 You've never seen this on "The Simpsons," right? 412 00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:20,211 No, I think "The Simpsons" would be more clever than that. 413 00:15:20,337 --> 00:15:22,797 Good! Then let us take my machine outside 414 00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:26,593 and make society finally pay for shunning us. 415 00:15:26,718 --> 00:15:28,386 Tonight on "The Simpsons, " 416 00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:31,139 it's a laugh-a-rama when Bart builds a machine 417 00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:33,642 that takes the cherries out of chocolate-covered cherries 418 00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:36,561 and replaces it instead with mayonnaise. 419 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:39,147 No. No, no! It can't be! 420 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:41,733 Uh-oh, "Simpsons" did it! "Simpsons" did it! 421 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,568 No! No! 422 00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:45,612 "Simpsons" did it! "Simpsons" did it! 423 00:15:45,737 --> 00:15:46,863 Aah! 424 00:15:46,988 --> 00:15:48,156 Don't have a cow, man. 425 00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:49,783 Oh, sweet Jesus! 426 00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:54,245 CARTMAN: [ Humming ] 427 00:15:57,332 --> 00:15:59,751 Can I help you? - Yes, my mommy told me 428 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,503 this is where I could find some sea men. 429 00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:04,214 Your mom told you? - Do you have them or not? 430 00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:07,467 We sell semen, yes, but not normally to children. 431 00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:09,803 What's your name? - Frances Bellman. 432 00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:11,179 Frances, let's talk. I don't want a bunch 433 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:12,681 of bull crap from you. 434 00:16:12,806 --> 00:16:13,974 You don't want a bunch of bull crap from me. 435 00:16:14,099 --> 00:16:15,308 Right? Where does that get us? Nowhere. 436 00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:16,893 The truth is, I'm completely certified 437 00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:18,728 to handle sea men. And though I may appear young, 438 00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:20,146 I'm one of the leading sea men authorities of the Midwest -- 439 00:16:20,271 --> 00:16:21,147 Up-and-comer. You know what I'm saying? 440 00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:22,524 Have my own business soon, 441 00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,109 and I'll need people to help me run it. 442 00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:25,568 I'm talking about you, Frances, and I'm talking 443 00:16:25,694 --> 00:16:27,237 about a six-figure income -- How's that sound? 444 00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:31,241 Everything we supply here is by a quarter-ounce, 445 00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:33,493 one donor, certified, on record. 446 00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:34,869 I see, very interesting. 447 00:16:34,995 --> 00:16:36,371 [ Pops ] 448 00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:39,332 - What are you doing? - Let's take a look here. 449 00:16:41,251 --> 00:16:43,128 Seems like quality stuff you got here, Frances. 450 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,005 Yeah, good texture, nice consistency. 451 00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:46,506 Sea men must be alive and healthy in there. 452 00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:49,134 I'll take five. - Five? Vials? 453 00:16:49,259 --> 00:16:51,511 No, gallons. - We don't have that much here. 454 00:16:51,636 --> 00:16:54,514 Damn it! Give me all you got then! 455 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:57,600 Aah! 456 00:16:57,726 --> 00:16:59,060 [ Panting ] Aaah! 457 00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:00,687 No! No! 458 00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:03,481 "Simpsons" did it! "Simpsons" did it! 459 00:17:08,403 --> 00:17:09,988 Aah! 460 00:17:11,489 --> 00:17:14,242 Hey, let me on! Let me on! 461 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:16,536 Sit down and shut up! 462 00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:18,371 Aah! 463 00:17:18,496 --> 00:17:21,291 Butters, have you seen Mr. Hat? 464 00:17:21,416 --> 00:17:23,334 Hello, there, children! 465 00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:26,963 Aah! Nooo! 466 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:29,924 What the hell's wrong with him? 467 00:17:32,469 --> 00:17:33,428 Look, the Sea-People have evolved 468 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:34,846 to an Egyptian-like culture! 469 00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:36,848 Soon they'll discover frozen foods! Aah! 470 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,308 That should be enough water, Kyle. 471 00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:39,768 You got the new Sea-People packets, Tweek? 472 00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:41,269 Aah! - Well, drop 'em in! 473 00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,772 And I've got the sea men. 474 00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:45,607 Wow, that's a lot of sea men you got there, Cartman. 475 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:47,400 Yeah, I bought all that I could at this bank, 476 00:17:47,525 --> 00:17:49,319 and then I got the rest from this guy, Ralph, in an alley. 477 00:17:49,444 --> 00:17:51,237 That's cool. - Yeah, and the sweet thing is, 478 00:17:51,362 --> 00:17:53,573 the stupid asshole didn't even charge me money for it! 479 00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:55,825 He just made me close my eyes and suck it out of a hose. 480 00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:58,661 Heh! There we go. 481 00:17:58,787 --> 00:18:01,498 Okay, now let's put the SeaCiety in its new home. 482 00:18:01,623 --> 00:18:03,917 [ Sea-People screaming ] 483 00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:08,088 Nothing to do now but wait. 484 00:18:09,964 --> 00:18:11,549 Close your eyes and suck it out of a hose? 485 00:18:11,674 --> 00:18:12,801 Uh-huh, suck it out of a hose, yeah. 486 00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:13,760 Huh. - Huh. 487 00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:25,647 Oh, my God! 488 00:18:25,772 --> 00:18:27,148 Their tiny underwater civilization 489 00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:29,734 has advanced hundreds of years! 490 00:18:29,859 --> 00:18:33,696 Look! There's a library and a temple and a... 491 00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:38,868 Oh...they think I'm God. 492 00:18:38,993 --> 00:18:40,078 Yes! 493 00:18:40,203 --> 00:18:42,455 I am god of the Sea-People! 494 00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:43,873 You hear that?! 495 00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:47,544 I am god of the Sea-People! 496 00:18:47,669 --> 00:18:51,047 I am master of their great sunken empire! 497 00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:54,175 Mom! I'm god of the Sea-People! 498 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:57,428 That's nice, poopie. 499 00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:02,851 And in other South Park news, 500 00:19:02,976 --> 00:19:05,436 elementary schoolteacher Ms. Choksondik's autopsy 501 00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:07,021 has shown that the semen in her stomach 502 00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:09,274 belonged to school counselor Mr. Mackey. 503 00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:10,692 However, the semen apparently 504 00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:12,443 did not contribute to the death, 505 00:19:12,569 --> 00:19:14,779 and so Mr. Mackey's identity is to remain anonymous. 506 00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:16,114 Hey, Butters! - Hey, Butters! 507 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:17,949 Aah! - Hey, what are you doing, man? 508 00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:19,325 Cartman said he has something really cool to show everybody. 509 00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:20,910 You got to come. - Cartman? 510 00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:23,204 Ha ha! 511 00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,543 Behold! You all see my tiny minions 512 00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:30,003 groveling at my likeness! 513 00:19:30,128 --> 00:19:32,213 I am Eric Cartman, God. 514 00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:33,840 Hey! We paid for the Sea-People, too. 515 00:19:33,965 --> 00:19:35,675 How come they're not making statues of us? 516 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:38,469 Be ye not jealous, Jew. I am creator of all things, yea. 517 00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:40,096 That is very impressive, Eric. 518 00:19:40,221 --> 00:19:42,265 What do you intend to do with your underwater society? 519 00:19:42,390 --> 00:19:43,892 I'm gonna send a message to my people 520 00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:45,685 and tell them to develop a great machine 521 00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:47,353 that will shrink me down to their size 522 00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:49,189 so I can live amongst them forever! 523 00:19:49,314 --> 00:19:51,357 Aha! Aha-hah! 524 00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:52,567 A-hah-hah-hah-hah! 525 00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:55,653 What the hell is wrong with you, Butters? 526 00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:58,156 They did that on "The Simpsons"! Ha! 527 00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,909 "Treehouse of Horror," episode 4F02, "The Genesis Tub"! 528 00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:03,411 Lisa loses a tooth, and the bacteria on it 529 00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:05,121 starts to grow and makes a little society, 530 00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:07,081 and they build a statue of her, thinking she's God! 531 00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:08,958 Ha! Ha-ha-ha! 532 00:20:10,835 --> 00:20:12,545 So? - Yeah, so? 533 00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:14,547 Dude, "The Simpsons" has done everything already. Who cares? 534 00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:16,341 Yeah, dude. They've been on the air for like 13 years. 535 00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:17,634 Of course they've done everything. 536 00:20:17,759 --> 00:20:18,927 Every idea has been done, Butters, 537 00:20:19,052 --> 00:20:20,345 even before "The Simpsons." 538 00:20:20,470 --> 00:20:22,764 Yeah -- In fact, that episode was a rip-off 539 00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,599 of a "Twilight Zone" episode. 540 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,727 Really? So I shouldn't care if I come up with an idea 541 00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,187 and "The Simpsons" already did it. 542 00:20:29,312 --> 00:20:32,607 It...doesn't matter. 543 00:20:34,317 --> 00:20:35,735 Everything is back to normal! 544 00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:37,362 I think -- I think I can go back 545 00:20:37,487 --> 00:20:39,239 to trying to destroy the world again! 546 00:20:39,364 --> 00:20:41,366 Good for you! - Yeah, that's great, Butters. 547 00:20:41,491 --> 00:20:42,408 Now get the hell out of my room. 548 00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:43,993 I feel like a spring chicken! 549 00:20:44,118 --> 00:20:45,745 I'm ready to wreak havoc once again! 550 00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:47,538 Hey, look, everybody! 551 00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,666 The other side of the aquarium is building another statue! 552 00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:54,796 Hey, it's Tweek! 553 00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:56,589 Me?! Oh, man! I don't want to be a god! 554 00:20:56,714 --> 00:20:59,217 That is way too much pressure! - That is bull crap! 555 00:20:59,342 --> 00:21:01,427 You better stop worshiping him, Sea-People! 556 00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:02,971 [ Explosions ] 557 00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:04,264 What's going on now? 558 00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:05,890 The Sea-People from Cartman's side 559 00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:07,725 are suicide-bombing the buildings on Tweek's side! 560 00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:08,726 Aah! 561 00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:09,978 Yeah! Go! 562 00:21:11,187 --> 00:21:12,230 Now what's happening?! 563 00:21:12,355 --> 00:21:13,648 The Sea-People on Tweek's side 564 00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:14,941 just suicide-bombed the Cartman statue! 565 00:21:15,066 --> 00:21:16,234 Oh, God damn it! 566 00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:19,862 [ Whooshing ] 567 00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:23,116 [ Sea-People screaming ] 568 00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:27,745 Oh, no! Oh, the humanity! 569 00:21:27,870 --> 00:21:30,206 Well, it was a nice project while it lasted, boys. 570 00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:31,582 Yeah, but I guess this proves 571 00:21:31,708 --> 00:21:33,209 that war is the natural order of life. 572 00:21:33,334 --> 00:21:35,753 Why can't societies just live in peace?