﻿1
00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:11,929
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪

2
00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,806
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

3
00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:15,599
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪

4
00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:18,602
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪

5
00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,604
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

6
00:00:20,730 --> 00:00:22,023
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪

7
00:00:22,148 --> 00:00:25,401
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

8
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:28,904
Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm!

9
00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:33,200
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪

10
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:37,246
[Bell rings]

11
00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:39,206
Okay.
Good, children, good.

12
00:00:39,331 --> 00:00:41,125
Remember to feel the clay.

13
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:42,793
Be one with the clay.

14
00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:43,919
Nice.
Uh-huh.

15
00:00:44,045 --> 00:00:46,797
[ Laughter ]

16
00:00:46,922 --> 00:00:48,758
Put more clay on the balls.

17
00:00:48,883 --> 00:00:51,302
Boys!
What is that?

18
00:00:51,427 --> 00:00:52,636
A reindeer?

19
00:00:52,762 --> 00:00:53,763
You know, I've had it!

20
00:00:53,888 --> 00:00:56,390
You four boys never take
art class seriously!

21
00:00:56,515 --> 00:00:57,391
What a crime.

22
00:00:57,516 --> 00:00:59,101
[Laughter]

23
00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:00,436
You think art is not important?

24
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,855
Well, art's just kind of...
for gaywads.

25
00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:04,106
I love art class!

26
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:05,107
See?

27
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:06,942
Do you think this is funny?!

28
00:01:07,068 --> 00:01:10,029
Do you think this is funny,
huh?!

29
00:01:10,154 --> 00:01:12,031
[ Snorting ]

30
00:01:12,156 --> 00:01:13,449
[ Laughter ]

31
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,451
Well, you four can
just spend your afternoon

32
00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:17,620
after school here,
making new pottery!

33
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:19,497
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

34
00:01:19,622 --> 00:01:20,664
You can't do that.

35
00:01:20,790 --> 00:01:22,416
I certainly can.
I'm your teacher.

36
00:01:22,541 --> 00:01:25,127
You're an <i>art</i> teacher.
- Make it two hours.

37
00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,754
[ Music continues ]

38
00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:28,756
Mrs. Dreible thinks
she's so cool.

39
00:01:28,881 --> 00:01:30,341
How dare she talk to us
like that?

40
00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:31,383
Mrph rmhmhm rm.

41
00:01:31,509 --> 00:01:33,302
We can't let her get away
with this.

42
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,721
I think tonight we need to do
something drastic.

43
00:01:35,846 --> 00:01:36,680
Like what?

44
00:01:36,806 --> 00:01:38,599
Like find out
where Mrs. Dreible lives

45
00:01:38,724 --> 00:01:42,728
and go over there and...
T.P. her house.

46
00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:45,064
Mrph!
- T.P. her house?

47
00:01:45,189 --> 00:01:47,191
Toilet paper.
Cover her house in toilet paper.

48
00:01:47,316 --> 00:01:48,275
Oh.

49
00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,027
What's the matter, Kyle?
You chicken?

50
00:01:50,152 --> 00:01:52,488
[ Imitates chicken clucking ]

51
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:53,405
[ Grunts ]

52
00:01:53,531 --> 00:01:55,533
Quiet, boys.
This isn't playtime.

53
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:56,909
You're being punished.

54
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:59,954
Fine. But we'll have the last
laugh tonight, art whore.

55
00:02:00,079 --> 00:02:02,498
Yeah.
Payback time, you ugly skank.

56
00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:08,546
[ Muzak playing ]

57
00:02:08,671 --> 00:02:11,173
You think that's enough?
- Should be fine.

58
00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:12,758
Don't you guys think
this is a little suspicious?

59
00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:14,510
We should buy something else
so it doesn't look obvious.

60
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:15,219
Okay.

61
00:02:15,344 --> 00:02:18,180
Here we go --
pack of chewing gum.

62
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:20,057
Hello, boys.
Find everything you need?

63
00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,225
Yep.
All set.

64
00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:23,519
Okay. Let's see here.
Toilet paper.

65
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,771
Toilet paper.
And toilet paper.

66
00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:28,440
Toilet paper.
Toilet paper.

67
00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:30,234
So, what are you kids up to
tonight?

68
00:02:30,359 --> 00:02:32,862
Oh, we're just gonna watch some
TV, maybe play a board game.

69
00:02:32,987 --> 00:02:34,405
Nice, relaxing night at home,
huh?

70
00:02:34,530 --> 00:02:36,198
Toilet paper.
Toilet paper.

71
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:37,408
And toilet paper.

72
00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:39,201
H-Hey.

73
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:41,412
Now, you kids be careful
with this chewing gum.

74
00:02:41,537 --> 00:02:43,038
Don't go sticking it
under tables.

75
00:02:43,164 --> 00:02:43,914
Okay.

76
00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:45,457
Okay.
Toilet paper.

77
00:02:45,583 --> 00:02:48,043
Toilet paper.
Toilet paper.

78
00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:50,462
You know, son, I remember you
coming in last week

79
00:02:50,588 --> 00:02:52,006
and buying this much
toilet paper.

80
00:02:52,131 --> 00:02:53,424
Oh, yeah.
That -- That's right.

81
00:02:53,549 --> 00:02:55,551
Toilet paper.
Toilet paper.

82
00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,344
You T.P.'d a house
last week, Cartman?

83
00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:59,138
No. Last Thursday night
was fajitas night.

84
00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:01,140
Oh.
Ugh.

85
00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:03,642
[ Suspenseful music plays ]

86
00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,061
[ Insects chirping ]

87
00:03:06,187 --> 00:03:07,354
Is this the right house?

88
00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:09,148
It's the right address.
Wait. Look there.

89
00:03:09,273 --> 00:03:11,734
There's Mrs. Dreible.
This is the place.

90
00:03:13,277 --> 00:03:14,945
Oh, wait, wait.
There's kids inside.

91
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:15,946
So?

92
00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:17,865
So I'm not T.P.'ing a house
with kids inside it.

93
00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:19,200
Kyle, we all agreed to do this.

94
00:03:19,325 --> 00:03:20,993
We didn't say nothing
about no kids, man.

95
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:22,286
Kyle, you're being an asshole.

96
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:24,788
Now let's do this thing
and get out of here.

97
00:03:24,914 --> 00:03:26,957
Here's what I think of your
art class, you Goddamn bitch!

98
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,876
Mrph. Mrph rhrmprhm.

99
00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:31,629
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

100
00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:52,107
[ Music continues ]

101
00:03:52,775 --> 00:03:54,902
Come on!
Let's go!

102
00:03:56,028 --> 00:03:57,363
What have we done?

103
00:03:57,488 --> 00:03:59,114
Let's go, Kyle!

104
00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:06,372
[ Breathing heavily ]

105
00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:09,333
We're -- We're in trouble.
We're in so much trouble.

106
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:11,460
Aw, man, that was so awesome!

107
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:12,628
How can you say that?

108
00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:14,004
Did you see what we did
to their house?

109
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,714
It'll take them days
to clean that up.

110
00:04:15,839 --> 00:04:16,423
Who cares?

111
00:04:16,548 --> 00:04:18,801
Well, you don't, because you're
an uncaring asshole, Cartman.

112
00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:20,761
Me?

113
00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:23,514
There's toilet paper
on your hands, too, Kyle.

114
00:04:23,639 --> 00:04:25,599
[ Dramatic music plays ]
Cartman's right, Kyle.

115
00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:27,559
We're all in this together.

116
00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:30,854
[ Harp plays ]
No.

117
00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:32,147
No.

118
00:04:32,273 --> 00:04:34,191
No!

119
00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:36,443
[ Screams ]

120
00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,112
Honey, what is it?

121
00:04:38,237 --> 00:04:40,698
Oh, Jesus, no!
Our house!

122
00:04:40,823 --> 00:04:43,659
Mommy. Mommy.
- Mommy. Mommy.

123
00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:47,162
Why? Why?

124
00:04:47,288 --> 00:04:50,207
Aah. Oh, God. Oh, God.

125
00:04:52,126 --> 00:04:53,502
[ Indistinct conversations ]

126
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,713
Hey, did you guys hear
what happened last night?

127
00:04:55,838 --> 00:04:58,007
Mrs. Dreible's house
got covered with toilet paper.

128
00:04:58,132 --> 00:05:00,551
Yeah. They say it's gonna take
three weeks to get it all down.

129
00:05:00,676 --> 00:05:03,387
Yeah. Well, old Mrs. Dreible
probably had it coming to her.

130
00:05:03,512 --> 00:05:04,430
I don't know.

131
00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,974
I don't think anybody deserves
that kind of brutality.

132
00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:09,184
Well, I understand the people
who did it weren't caught,

133
00:05:09,310 --> 00:05:11,103
so looks like nobody
will ever know the geniuses

134
00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:12,604
who masterminded
that perfect crime.

135
00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:14,023
[ Bell rings ]

136
00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:16,442
Okay, children,
let's take our seats.

137
00:05:16,567 --> 00:05:18,068
Oh, uh, Stan, Kyle,
Eric, and Kenny,

138
00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:20,029
the counselor wants to see you
in his office, now.

139
00:05:20,154 --> 00:05:20,988
Damn.

140
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:22,072
Oh, God.

141
00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:24,616
How the hell did they find out

142
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:26,076
it was us that T.P.'d
that house?

143
00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:28,037
Will you relax, Kyle?
They've got nothing on us.

144
00:05:28,162 --> 00:05:30,122
As long as we all stick
to our story, we'll be fine.

145
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:32,458
We'd better go over our story
again so we don't screw it up.

146
00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:34,168
Okay, last night, all four of us

147
00:05:34,293 --> 00:05:36,253
were at the bowling alley
until about 7:30,

148
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,713
at which time we noticed
Ally Sheedy,

149
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:38,964
the goth chick
from "The Breakfast Club,"

150
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:39,965
was in the lane next to us,

151
00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:41,175
and we asked her
for her autograph,

152
00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,010
but she didn't have a pen,
so we followed her to her car,

153
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:44,636
but on the way, we were accosted
by five Scientologists

154
00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:46,055
who wanted to give us all
personality tests,

155
00:05:46,180 --> 00:05:47,931
which were administered at the
Scientology center in Denver

156
00:05:48,057 --> 00:05:48,766
until 10:45, at which time

157
00:05:48,891 --> 00:05:50,142
we accidentally boarded
the wrong bus home

158
00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:52,227
and ended up in Rancho de Fritas
Rojos, south of Castle Rock,

159
00:05:52,353 --> 00:05:53,604
and finally got a ride home
with a man

160
00:05:53,729 --> 00:05:55,606
who was missing his left index
finger, named Gary Bushwell,

161
00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:58,359
arriving home at 11:46.

162
00:05:58,484 --> 00:06:01,070
I'm confused. Did Ally Sheedy
take the personality test?

163
00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:01,945
Yes, dude.

164
00:06:02,071 --> 00:06:03,364
Kyle, it's very simple --

165
00:06:03,489 --> 00:06:04,698
We followed Ally Sheedy
out to her car,

166
00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:06,450
but on the way, we were accosted
by five Scientologists

167
00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:07,910
who wanted to give us all
personality tests,

168
00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:09,787
which were administered at the
Scientology center in Denver

169
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:10,621
until 10:45, at which time

170
00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:12,039
we accidentally boarded
the wrong bus home

171
00:06:12,164 --> 00:06:13,957
and ended up in Rancho de Fritas
Rojos, south of Castle Rock,

172
00:06:14,083 --> 00:06:15,250
and finally got a ride home
with a man

173
00:06:15,376 --> 00:06:17,127
who was missing his left index
finger, named Gary Bushwell,

174
00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:18,837
arriving home at 11:46 --
You got it?

175
00:06:18,962 --> 00:06:21,632
Uh, I-I --
- Oh, for Christ's sake!

176
00:06:21,757 --> 00:06:23,217
Kyle, just let Cartman
do all the talking, okay?

177
00:06:23,342 --> 00:06:24,593
He's better at being in trouble
than anybody.

178
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,594
Thank you, Stan.

179
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,513
Shh, shh.
Here they come. Here they come.

180
00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:29,723
And so I said,
"That's a terrific joke, Wendy.

181
00:06:29,848 --> 00:06:31,016
Tell us another one."

182
00:06:31,141 --> 00:06:33,602
Oh, hello, Mr. Mackey.
Are you ready to see us now?

183
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,313
We're gonna talk to you
one at a time, boys, m'kay?

184
00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:38,649
Kenny, will you step
into my office, please?

185
00:06:38,774 --> 00:06:39,400
Mrh?

186
00:06:39,525 --> 00:06:41,819
Come on, Kenny.
Let's go, m'kay?

187
00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:46,031
Touché, Mr. Mackey, touché.

188
00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:47,491
Why are they doing us
one at a time?

189
00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:49,076
They want to see
if we mix the story up

190
00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:50,953
and see if somebody
will rat out the other three

191
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:51,912
for a better deal.

192
00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:53,080
I can get a better deal?

193
00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:55,249
Kyle, so help me God, if you
Jew us out on this one,

194
00:06:55,374 --> 00:06:56,458
I will fucking kill you.

195
00:06:58,043 --> 00:07:00,337
There we go. That should be
about the last of it.

196
00:07:00,462 --> 00:07:02,423
[ Humming ]

197
00:07:05,092 --> 00:07:08,011
Ex-- Excuse me.
Uh, w-what are you doing?

198
00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:10,264
Crime scene investigation.

199
00:07:10,389 --> 00:07:12,307
There are several footprints
in the snow --

200
00:07:12,433 --> 00:07:13,976
perhaps more than one
perpetrator?

201
00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:16,937
Uh, look, we really don't want
to make a big deal out of this.

202
00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:18,439
Is that the toilet paper there?

203
00:07:18,564 --> 00:07:20,524
I'll need to take those bags
as evidence.

204
00:07:20,649 --> 00:07:22,359
Look, it's just not
that big a deal.

205
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:25,487
I mean, I toilet-papered houses
myself when I was a kid.

206
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:28,866
You? So where were you
last night at around 9:00?

207
00:07:28,991 --> 00:07:30,117
I was here.

208
00:07:30,242 --> 00:07:32,202
Aha!
Got you!

209
00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:34,872
Officer, why would I T.P.
my own house?

210
00:07:34,997 --> 00:07:36,248
Insurance?

211
00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:37,791
It wasn't me, okay?

212
00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:40,252
Now, if you don't mind, I want
to get my yard back to normal.

213
00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:41,503
Now, you listen to me.

214
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:42,754
Whoever T.P.'d your house

215
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,465
is still out there
roaming the streets.

216
00:07:44,590 --> 00:07:46,467
It's only a matter of time
before another house

217
00:07:46,592 --> 00:07:48,469
and another family
is victimized!

218
00:07:48,594 --> 00:07:50,929
I have to stop that
from happening.

219
00:07:51,054 --> 00:07:53,724
You really have nothing better
to do, do you?

220
00:07:53,849 --> 00:07:56,435
No, I do not.

221
00:07:58,270 --> 00:07:59,229
No.

222
00:07:59,354 --> 00:08:02,524
No. No.

223
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,443
Aah.

224
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:06,945
Oh, Jesus, no. Our house.

225
00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,281
Mommy! Mommy!
- Mommy! Mommy!

226
00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:14,036
Why? Why? Why?
[ Sobbing ]

227
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,371
[ Dramatic music plays ]

228
00:08:17,414 --> 00:08:18,707
Oh, God.
Oh, God.

229
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,627
I have to tell the truth.
Mom!

230
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:23,670
[ Breathing heavily ]

231
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:26,381
Hello, Kyle.
Going somewhere?

232
00:08:27,799 --> 00:08:30,594
I was -- I was just going
to get a drink of water.

233
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,222
No need.
I have one for you right here.

234
00:08:34,223 --> 00:08:37,017
Oh. Okay.
Thanks.

235
00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:38,894
Is there anything else
I can get for you?

236
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,438
No. I'll just be going
back to bed now.

237
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:44,066
You do that.
Good night, Kyle.

238
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:50,864
Josh Meyers T.P.'d over
600 houses in less than a year.

239
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:52,115
He's a real monster.

240
00:08:52,241 --> 00:08:53,951
I just need to talk to someone

241
00:08:54,076 --> 00:08:56,495
who knows
how toilet-paperers think.

242
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:57,621
Just remember --

243
00:08:57,746 --> 00:09:01,291
He'd toilet-paper you in
a second if he had the chance.

244
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:04,169
He's the last cell on your left.

245
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:06,380
[ Door closes, latch clicks ]

246
00:09:06,505 --> 00:09:09,132
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

247
00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:17,891
Hello, Josh.
My name is Officer Barbrady.

248
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:19,810
I'm with the South Park police.

249
00:09:19,935 --> 00:09:22,062
[ British accent ] That's a
terrible cologne you're wearing, Officer.

250
00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:24,565
You should try something
more...casual.

251
00:09:24,690 --> 00:09:28,110
I was hoping you could help me
solve a toilet-papering case.

252
00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:29,278
And why would I do that?

253
00:09:29,403 --> 00:09:31,446
Because I'm such a charming
fella?

254
00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:34,908
Uh, please. I need your help.
What would you want in return?

255
00:09:36,159 --> 00:09:37,911
Due to the harsh nature
of my crimes,

256
00:09:38,036 --> 00:09:40,414
they don't allow me to have
toilet paper in my cell.

257
00:09:40,539 --> 00:09:42,583
You can imagine how bothersome
that becomes.

258
00:09:42,708 --> 00:09:45,419
You know I can't give you
toilet paper, Josh.

259
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:48,422
No, but it was worth a try,
wasn't it?

260
00:09:48,547 --> 00:09:49,756
Tell me something, Officer --

261
00:09:49,881 --> 00:09:51,550
Why is it that you police
such a small town?

262
00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:52,968
You must have had
larger inspirations.

263
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,596
What happened
to those big-city dreams?

264
00:09:55,721 --> 00:09:57,472
Well, that's kind of personal.

265
00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:58,932
Quid pro quo, Officer.

266
00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:00,559
Tell me what I want to know,

267
00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:04,438
and I'll help you catch whoever
toilet-papered that house.

268
00:10:05,814 --> 00:10:07,941
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

269
00:10:08,066 --> 00:10:09,693
Look, kid,
I have very little time

270
00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,987
to catch whoever toilet-papered
that house.

271
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,363
Tell me what you know.

272
00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:14,990
Are those the crime-scene
photos?

273
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:16,116
Let me see them.

274
00:10:20,329 --> 00:10:22,372
Yes.
Yes.

275
00:10:22,497 --> 00:10:24,333
Not bad work.
Not bad at all.

276
00:10:24,458 --> 00:10:25,959
These toilet-paperers
are professionals --

277
00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:27,252
at least one of them is.

278
00:10:27,377 --> 00:10:29,504
So you think there was more
than one. Why?

279
00:10:29,630 --> 00:10:30,839
Tell me something first.

280
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:33,258
When you went to the academy, you had
something to prove, you wanted

281
00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:35,135
to protect and serve, but mostly you just wanted
to protect yourself.

282
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:37,846
Who were you protecting yourself
from, Officer Barbrady?

283
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:38,680
All right!
All right!

284
00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:40,641
My Uncle Charles used to hit me
with a belt!

285
00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:42,225
[ Sobs ]

286
00:10:42,351 --> 00:10:43,268
Thank you.

287
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:45,187
Your toilet-paperers
are most like males

288
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:47,230
between the ages of 8 and 10
and probably virgins.

289
00:10:47,356 --> 00:10:48,774
Parents notice
that much toilet paper missing,

290
00:10:48,899 --> 00:10:50,233
so they would've bought it
themselves.

291
00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:51,902
Find out where the toilet paper
came from,

292
00:10:52,027 --> 00:10:53,570
and you just might catch
your man.

293
00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:55,280
[ Bell rings ]

294
00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:58,909
Stan, Kenny, can I talk
to you guys for a second?

295
00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:00,952
I think we have the counselor
and principal fooled,

296
00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:02,663
but we need to talk about Kyle.

297
00:11:02,788 --> 00:11:04,414
- What about him?
- Come on. You know.

298
00:11:04,539 --> 00:11:05,791
He's losing it.
He's gonna crack.

299
00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:06,792
Mrph rmhmhm rm.

300
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:08,877
Kyle can't take the heat.
He's gonna sing like a canary.

301
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:10,587
Then we're all gonna take
the fall for what we did.

302
00:11:10,712 --> 00:11:12,172
Hey, fellas!

303
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:13,590
Butters.

304
00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:16,468
[ Sniffs ]

305
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,470
[ Clears throat ]

306
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:22,557
[ Indistinct conversations,
lockers closing ]

307
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:24,476
Look, all it takes
is for one of us to crack,

308
00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:26,144
and we all know
who the weakest link is.

309
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:27,145
So what should we do?

310
00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:30,148
We have no choice.
We have to kill Kyle.

311
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:32,526
Dude, we're not killing Kyle!
- Mrph!

312
00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:35,070
Why not?
- Kyle's not gonna say anything.

313
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,905
He almost spilled the beans
in the counselor's office.

314
00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,281
He can't even keep
the story straight.

315
00:11:38,407 --> 00:11:39,783
I'm telling you guys, he's weak.

316
00:11:39,908 --> 00:11:42,119
He's weak, and he'll be
the end of all of us.

317
00:11:42,244 --> 00:11:43,995
[ Dramatic music plays ]

318
00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:46,081
You wanted to see me,
Officer Barbrady?

319
00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:47,708
Yes.
Thanks for coming, Mr. Bell.

320
00:11:47,833 --> 00:11:49,292
A house was T.P.'d
in South Park,

321
00:11:49,418 --> 00:11:51,753
and I need to see if you can
identify the toilet paper

322
00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:53,213
I recovered from the scene.

323
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:56,091
I'm sorry I have to do this.

324
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,218
[ Both gasp, cough ]

325
00:11:58,343 --> 00:11:59,428
Oh, my God.

326
00:11:59,553 --> 00:12:02,055
Is this toilet paper
from your store?

327
00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:05,100
It's...difficult to tell.
It's so decayed.

328
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:06,435
I...wait a minute.
Yes.

329
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,645
Yes, I recognize
the floral pattern now.

330
00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,313
Positive I.D.
on the toilet paper.

331
00:12:10,439 --> 00:12:12,399
Who would do this
to toilet paper? Who?

332
00:12:12,524 --> 00:12:14,526
Mr. Bell, do you remember
anyone suspicious

333
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,570
buying toilet paper
in the last few days?

334
00:12:16,695 --> 00:12:17,821
Suspicious like how?

335
00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:21,450
Well, like someone who was black
or Mexican or Middle-Eastern.

336
00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:24,536
No, the only Mexican guy I recall
bought toaster tarts and chips.

337
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,581
And we don't allow Middle-
Eastern people in the store.

338
00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:29,332
Oh my God.

339
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:32,169
[ Insects chirping ]

340
00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:33,712
What's this all about, Cartman?

341
00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:35,672
I just wanted to see
how you're doing, Kyle.

342
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:37,174
Why don't we go out
for a little boat ride?

343
00:12:37,299 --> 00:12:38,008
A boat ride?

344
00:12:38,133 --> 00:12:40,177
I just thought we should find
a private place to talk.

345
00:12:40,302 --> 00:12:41,511
Well, okay.

346
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:44,181
Could you help me put this block
and chain in the boat?

347
00:12:50,771 --> 00:12:52,481
Okay.
Let's go.

348
00:12:53,482 --> 00:12:56,985
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

349
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,491
So, how are things, Kyle?

350
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:03,533
Terrible.

351
00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:05,911
Every time I close my eyes,
I see the house we T.P.'d.

352
00:13:06,036 --> 00:13:07,370
I see the tears
of our art teacher

353
00:13:07,496 --> 00:13:09,122
and hear the screams
of her daughters.

354
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:11,666
And you feel like
you have to confess.

355
00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:12,876
I don't know what to do.

356
00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:15,212
Part of me feels
like I have to end it all now,

357
00:13:15,337 --> 00:13:17,464
tell people what happened.

358
00:13:17,589 --> 00:13:20,717
You know, I never noticed how
beautiful this pond was before.

359
00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:22,010
So calm.

360
00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,720
The world can be like that --

361
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:28,016
so calm on the outside,
as if nothing bad ever happens.

362
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,142
[ Thunk ]

363
00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:30,227
Ow.

364
00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:31,978
What the hell are you doing,
Cartman?

365
00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:32,979
I'm killing you,

366
00:13:33,104 --> 00:13:34,481
but unfortunately I could only
afford a Wiffle bat,

367
00:13:34,606 --> 00:13:35,482
so it's gonna take a while.

368
00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:36,817
[ Thunk ]
Cartman!

369
00:13:36,942 --> 00:13:38,318
Don't fight it, Kyle.
It will only take longer.

370
00:13:38,443 --> 00:13:39,903
Just slip
into sweet unconsciousness.

371
00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:41,112
[ Thunk ]

372
00:13:41,238 --> 00:13:42,739
You want to kill me?
Fine!

373
00:13:42,864 --> 00:13:45,408
I can't live like this anymore!
Go ahead!

374
00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:46,868
Do it.

375
00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:49,955
[ Thunk ]

376
00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:56,795
Won't be long now, Kyle.

377
00:13:57,796 --> 00:13:59,923
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

378
00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,092
Josh, I need more help.

379
00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:04,719
The answer is right in front
of you, but you can't see it.

380
00:14:04,845 --> 00:14:05,887
How do you mean?

381
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:08,765
Tell me. The toilet paper --
Was it quilted?

382
00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:09,683
Yes.

383
00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:12,435
Single-sheet?
- No, two-ply.

384
00:14:12,561 --> 00:14:14,479
What?
What does that tell you?

385
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:18,149
Why does one toilet-paper
a house, Officer?

386
00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:19,985
To get revenge.

387
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:21,820
No. That is incidental.

388
00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:24,573
Your toilet-paperers wanted to
transform the teacher's house,

389
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:26,700
thus transforming
her entire occupation.

390
00:14:26,825 --> 00:14:27,826
What do you mean?

391
00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:30,245
Your uncle who hit you with
a belt -- Was he a large man?

392
00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:31,955
I don't have time for this, kid.

393
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:33,874
Did he stink like beer
when he came home from work

394
00:14:33,999 --> 00:14:36,167
all tired from playing
down at the pool house?

395
00:14:36,293 --> 00:14:36,918
All right!
All right!

396
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,170
My dad dressed me up like
a little girl on poker nights

397
00:14:39,296 --> 00:14:41,464
and made me sit
on all my uncles' laps!

398
00:14:41,590 --> 00:14:44,301
[ Sobs ]

399
00:14:44,926 --> 00:14:45,802
Whoa.

400
00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:47,721
Uh, oh--thank you.

401
00:14:47,846 --> 00:14:49,639
Your toilet-paperers
are most likely students

402
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:50,682
in the art teacher's class,

403
00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:52,183
students who aren't
very good at art.

404
00:14:52,309 --> 00:14:54,978
Oh. Of course.
One of her students!

405
00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:57,606
Fly along now, Officer Barbrady.
You've got some arrests to make.

406
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,357
Fly, fly, fly.
Fly, fly, fly.

407
00:15:02,277 --> 00:15:05,488
Josh, were you doing the silly
voice for the policeman again?

408
00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:06,573
[ Normal voice ]
No, sir.

409
00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:08,033
[ Thunk ]

410
00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,368
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

411
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:16,833
Cartman, what are you doing?
- I'm getting rid of our problem.

412
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:18,627
Kyle will be dead
in a matter of hours.

413
00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:20,211
[ Thunk ]

414
00:15:20,337 --> 00:15:21,504
You don't have
to kill Kyle, dude.

415
00:15:21,630 --> 00:15:23,840
The police made an arrest,
and the person confessed!

416
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,425
They did?
- They did?

417
00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:27,802
They say they got the guy that
did it at the police station.

418
00:15:27,928 --> 00:15:30,096
Who confessed?
That doesn't make any sense.

419
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:32,349
But can I still kill Kyle?

420
00:15:33,642 --> 00:15:36,645
[ Dramatic music plays ]

421
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:38,897
Hello, boys.
How are you?

422
00:15:39,022 --> 00:15:40,315
We heard that you have
the person

423
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,566
who T.P.'d
the art teacher's house.

424
00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:43,693
Is that true?
- It sure is.

425
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:46,446
Uh, could we see them --
him -- her?

426
00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:47,948
Right over here.

427
00:15:48,073 --> 00:15:50,784
Yeah, we interrogated
the suspect for over 40 hours,

428
00:15:50,909 --> 00:15:52,661
and he finally cracked.

429
00:15:52,786 --> 00:15:54,162
Hey, fellas!

430
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:55,246
Butters?

431
00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:57,332
Yep.
I'm in jail.

432
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:58,667
You confessed?

433
00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:01,294
Uh-huh. Uh, they said I T.P.'d
the art teacher's house.

434
00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:04,005
I don't seem to remember it, but
they're pretty sure it was me.

435
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,383
I just can't get my behavior
under control.

436
00:16:06,508 --> 00:16:08,593
His parents are
on their way down now.

437
00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:11,096
Yeah. And, boy,
are they gonna let me have it.

438
00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:13,098
Just wait till my father
gets here.

439
00:16:13,223 --> 00:16:15,266
You guys,
we can't let him do this.

440
00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:17,352
What are you talking about?
This is a gift from God.

441
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:18,853
An early Easter present
all wrapped up

442
00:16:18,979 --> 00:16:21,147
with a pretty ribbon
from Jesus Christ himself.

443
00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:22,983
I'm just a little asshole
is what I am.

444
00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:23,942
When God made me,

445
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:25,694
He must have not been paying
very close attention,

446
00:16:25,819 --> 00:16:28,196
'cause I turned out wrong --
just plain wrong.

447
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:30,365
Officer Barbrady,
Butters didn't T.P. that house.

448
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:31,366
Why do you say that?

449
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,326
Because it was --
- Wiffle ball, anyone?

450
00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:35,537
Anyone care for a nice game
of Wiffle ball?

451
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:37,664
You know, it's not my parents
I'm worried about.

452
00:16:37,789 --> 00:16:39,082
It's my girlfriend, Carrie.

453
00:16:39,207 --> 00:16:40,208
Well, she lives in Michigan.

454
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,584
But when she finds out
about this,

455
00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:43,670
whoo, smokies,
is she gonna be sore.

456
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:45,213
She might even break up with me.

457
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,756
And it would serve me right,
too.

458
00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:48,633
All right, boys.
Visiting time is over.

459
00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:50,176
Thanks for stopping by.

460
00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:52,804
[ Birds chirping ]

461
00:16:52,929 --> 00:16:55,306
You see, you guys?
It all worked itself out.

462
00:16:55,432 --> 00:16:57,767
Ta-dow. Ta-dow.
How do you like me now?

463
00:16:57,892 --> 00:16:59,394
Feel a little silly now, Kyle?

464
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:00,979
Ta-dow.
How do you like me now?

465
00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:02,564
I still feel bad, Cartman.

466
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:05,191
What?
How -- How can you feel bad?

467
00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:06,985
Somebody else is gonna pay
for our crime.

468
00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:09,571
Yeah.
That makes it even worse.

469
00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,114
Buh...

470
00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:14,200
Uh, K-Kyle, you don't seem
to understand.

471
00:17:14,325 --> 00:17:16,453
W-We're not gonna get punished
for this, ever.

472
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:18,038
I know.

473
00:17:18,747 --> 00:17:21,624
S--
So then how can you feel bad?

474
00:17:21,750 --> 00:17:23,001
He feels guilty for doing it

475
00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:25,670
and for letting someone else pay
for it.

476
00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:27,213
But he's not gonna get
in trouble.

477
00:17:27,338 --> 00:17:28,840
It doesn't matter
if you get in trouble or not.

478
00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:30,050
You can still feel bad.

479
00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:32,093
I think you're right, Kyle.
Maybe we should confess.

480
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:33,219
Mrph.
Rm mrprhm.

481
00:17:33,344 --> 00:17:35,680
What?
D-- You guys.

482
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,348
There's nothing
to feel bad about.

483
00:17:37,474 --> 00:17:38,600
We're off scot-free!

484
00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:41,144
We feel bad for other people.

485
00:17:42,479 --> 00:17:44,856
For o-- For --

486
00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:46,691
[ Grunts ]
Ow.

487
00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:50,653
I-Is it that you think
you might get in trouble <i>later?</i>

488
00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:52,781
Tomorrow in school, we'll tell
the art teacher it was us

489
00:17:52,906 --> 00:17:53,907
and let her decide what to do.

490
00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:55,867
And, Cartman, if you have any
thread of a conscience at all,

491
00:17:55,992 --> 00:17:56,868
you'll do the same.

492
00:17:56,993 --> 00:17:59,037
[ Stammers, sighs ]

493
00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:02,207
Freakin' weirdos, man.

494
00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:05,210
Well, well, well.
I had to see it to believe it.

495
00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:06,377
Hi, Dad.

496
00:18:06,503 --> 00:18:08,254
Don't you "Hi, Dad" me.

497
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:12,050
Look at you, standing
behind prison bars -- again!

498
00:18:12,175 --> 00:18:12,967
Yeah.

499
00:18:13,093 --> 00:18:14,928
What fibs have you been telling
this policeman, Butters?

500
00:18:15,053 --> 00:18:17,597
You know damn well you didn't
toilet-paper that house.

501
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:18,264
Huh?

502
00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:20,266
Butters was with us all night,
Officer Barbrady.

503
00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:21,518
Butters, what have we told you

504
00:18:21,643 --> 00:18:23,436
about confessing to crimes
you didn't commit?

505
00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:24,479
We have had it, mister!

506
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:26,272
Well, they kept accusing me
for hours,

507
00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:28,441
and then he shot me up
with sodium pentothal.

508
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:29,984
And that's your excuse?

509
00:18:30,110 --> 00:18:31,569
Well, looks like
I made a mistake.

510
00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:33,530
I guess I better let you out
now.

511
00:18:33,655 --> 00:18:36,199
Just wait till we get you home,
you little fibber!

512
00:18:36,324 --> 00:18:38,785
Officer, can I stay in jail,
please?

513
00:18:39,744 --> 00:18:41,538
Come on, you guys!
Hurry!

514
00:18:41,663 --> 00:18:42,705
What is it, Cartman?

515
00:18:42,831 --> 00:18:45,083
It's over this way.
Come on!

516
00:18:45,208 --> 00:18:47,961
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

517
00:18:51,422 --> 00:18:53,466
So, how are things, guys?

518
00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:55,802
Cartman, we're confessing
tomorrow, and that's final.

519
00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:57,595
I'm afraid
I can't let that happen.

520
00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:59,264
You can't kill all three of us,
Cartman.

521
00:18:59,389 --> 00:19:00,557
Can't I?

522
00:19:00,682 --> 00:19:02,684
[ Thunk ]

523
00:19:07,564 --> 00:19:08,857
Excuse me, everyone.

524
00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:11,401
I have someone with me
who can tell us all

525
00:19:11,526 --> 00:19:13,611
who toilet-papered
the art teacher's house!

526
00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:15,238
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

527
00:19:15,363 --> 00:19:16,948
Josh insisted he be able

528
00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:19,701
to tell you the names of
the toilet-paperers in person.

529
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,452
Uh, that's nice,
Officer Barbrady,

530
00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:23,955
but we actually don't need --
- Hold it!

531
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,291
Principal Victoria, Mr. Mackey,
Mrs. Dreible,

532
00:19:26,416 --> 00:19:28,293
we have something we need
to tell you.

533
00:19:28,418 --> 00:19:31,045
All right. Will you people stop
barging into my office, please?

534
00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:32,255
What's the matter,
Principal Victoria?

535
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:33,256
Was your mother abusive?

536
00:19:33,381 --> 00:19:34,716
Did she spank your thighs
with cold cuts

537
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,426
and stick umbrellas up your ass?

538
00:19:36,551 --> 00:19:37,635
Get him out of here.

539
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:40,346
Uh, Policeman Brown, will you
take Josh outside, please?

540
00:19:40,471 --> 00:19:42,557
Ooh. Policeman Brown.
Never quite made officer.

541
00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:44,100
Why is that, Policeman Brown?

542
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:46,019
We have to confess
that we were the ones that --

543
00:19:46,144 --> 00:19:47,562
It's too late, boys, m'kay?

544
00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:49,355
We already know everything.

545
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,983
You -- You do?
How?

546
00:19:52,108 --> 00:19:53,651
[ Down-tempo music plays ]

547
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:54,861
Hi, guys.

548
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:55,820
Cartman?

549
00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:57,739
I told them everything, guys.
It's over.

550
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,908
Luckily for us, one of you
had enough of a conscience

551
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:00,909
to come forward.

552
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,785
My consciousness
just caught up with me.

553
00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:03,786
That's not fair!

554
00:20:03,912 --> 00:20:05,622
You all get two weeks
of detention,

555
00:20:05,747 --> 00:20:08,082
except for Eric, who gets
one week for being brave.

556
00:20:08,208 --> 00:20:10,627
B-But he's lying!
He doesn't have a conscience!

557
00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:12,670
Well, I guess my work here
is done.

558
00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:16,174
After all this,
I'm gonna need a long vacation.

559
00:20:16,299 --> 00:20:17,926
This was supposed to be
<i>my</i> story,

560
00:20:18,051 --> 00:20:19,928
<i>my</i> coming to terms
with a guilty conscience.

561
00:20:20,053 --> 00:20:21,512
This isn't fair!

562
00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:23,514
Okay, Josh.
Time to go back to the --

563
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,433
- [ Dramatic music plays ]
- Oh, no!

564
00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:28,353
H-He was too fast for me.
He ran out the door!

565
00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:30,939
Well, couldn't you have gone
after him?

566
00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:33,149
Well, I-I'm covered in toilet
paper.

567
00:20:33,274 --> 00:20:34,943
I'd look silly.

568
00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:36,819
[ Bell rings ]

569
00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:38,404
Welcome to detention.

570
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:40,323
You will be here until 5:00,

571
00:20:40,448 --> 00:20:43,576
so make good study use
of your time, m'kay?

572
00:20:43,701 --> 00:20:44,786
Oof.
Two weeks of this.

573
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:47,121
Yeah. But I have to say
I feel a lot better now.

574
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,289
I know what you mean, Kyle.

575
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:50,500
I realize now that even though
you might not get caught

576
00:20:50,625 --> 00:20:52,710
doing something bad,
you can still get caught later.

577
00:20:52,835 --> 00:20:53,544
Oh, Jesus.

578
00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:55,922
I didn't feel bad before,
but now I just feel terrible.

579
00:20:56,047 --> 00:20:58,299
You just feel bad for yourself
that you're in detention.

580
00:20:58,424 --> 00:20:59,133
Right.

581
00:20:59,259 --> 00:21:00,718
I guess I learned today
that sometimes you --

582
00:21:00,843 --> 00:21:02,345
Oh, stop it, Cartman.
You didn't learn anything.

583
00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:04,847
Not a goddamn thing.

584
00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:06,266
Hmm.

585
00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:09,560
[ Telephone rings ]

586
00:21:09,686 --> 00:21:11,312
Police station.

587
00:21:11,437 --> 00:21:12,981
Hello, Officer Barbrady.

588
00:21:13,106 --> 00:21:15,358
Josh?
Josh, where are you?

589
00:21:15,483 --> 00:21:16,985
I'm afraid that giving away
my location

590
00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:18,653
might be harmful to my freedom,
Officer.

591
00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:19,696
I just wanted to thank you

592
00:21:19,821 --> 00:21:21,364
for helping me get out
of that dingy cell.

593
00:21:21,489 --> 00:21:23,408
Josh, you have to go back
to juvenile hall.

594
00:21:23,533 --> 00:21:25,159
You only have
a three-week sentence.

595
00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:26,286
Sorry, Officer.
Got to run.

596
00:21:26,411 --> 00:21:27,704
There's something
I've been meaning to do

597
00:21:27,829 --> 00:21:28,705
for quite some time.

598
00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:29,539
Ciao.

599
00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:32,083
[ Suspenseful music plays ]

