1
00:00:02,872 --> 00:00:04,529
There was water everywhere.
2
00:00:04,530 --> 00:00:05,897
It was such a mess.
3
00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:07,918
That stinks. How long are you
out of the apartment?
4
00:00:07,919 --> 00:00:08,919
About five weeks.
5
00:00:08,987 --> 00:00:10,231
Ugh! Did you lose
anything valuable?
6
00:00:10,255 --> 00:00:11,722
Well, the pipe was
over my closet,
7
00:00:11,790 --> 00:00:13,190
so all my
clothes are gone.
8
00:00:13,258 --> 00:00:15,693
Oh, so nothing. Great.
9
00:00:16,464 --> 00:00:18,169
Do they know why
the pipe burst?
10
00:00:18,235 --> 00:00:19,435
They didn't say.
11
00:00:19,503 --> 00:00:20,937
Buildings
that have a combination
12
00:00:21,004 --> 00:00:22,205
of copper and galvanized steel
13
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:24,936
are susceptible to
pinholes and corrosion
14
00:00:25,036 --> 00:00:27,371
caused by the mobility
of ions in the water.
15
00:00:31,267 --> 00:00:34,136
Can't have your head shoved
in a toilet as much as I did
16
00:00:34,137 --> 00:00:37,940
and not pick up a few things
about plumbing.
17
00:00:38,008 --> 00:00:41,210
Well, if you need a place to
crash, you can stay with us.
18
00:00:41,278 --> 00:00:42,745
- Really?
- Of course.
19
00:00:42,813 --> 00:00:45,681
You can stay in Leonard's room,
and we'll stay at my place.
20
00:00:45,749 --> 00:00:47,349
You're sure
that's not an inconvenience?
21
00:00:47,417 --> 00:00:48,684
No, not at all.
22
00:00:48,752 --> 00:00:50,052
And we live with Sheldon,
23
00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:52,421
so the word "inconvenience"
has really lost all meaning.
24
00:00:53,857 --> 00:00:57,393
So, technically, I'd be
moving in with my boyfriend?
25
00:00:57,461 --> 00:00:58,928
I guess so.
26
00:00:58,995 --> 00:01:01,444
I'd finally get to live
alone with my husband.
27
00:01:01,921 --> 00:01:04,083
Oh, my, this is
a big step.
28
00:01:04,084 --> 00:01:04,831
Mm-hmm.
29
00:01:04,832 --> 00:01:06,833
For two of us, it's in
the right direction.
30
00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:15,874
Why are you all smiling
like crazy people?
31
00:01:15,942 --> 00:01:19,378
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
32
00:01:19,445 --> 00:01:22,781
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
33
00:01:22,849 --> 00:01:24,349
♪ The Earth began to cool
34
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:26,897
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
35
00:01:26,953 --> 00:01:29,588
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
36
00:01:29,656 --> 00:01:32,224
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
37
00:01:32,292 --> 00:01:34,192
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
38
00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:34,684
♪ Bang! ♪
39
00:01:34,685 --> 00:01:38,685
♪ The Big Bang Theory 10x04 ♪
The Cohabitation Experimentation
Original
40
00:01:38,686 --> 00:01:44,986
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
41
00:01:45,088 --> 00:01:47,256
Cohabitation
with my girlfriend?
42
00:01:47,324 --> 00:01:49,057
That's a great deal
to process.
43
00:01:49,081 --> 00:01:49,525
Mm.
44
00:01:49,526 --> 00:01:50,860
It's only for five weeks.
45
00:01:50,927 --> 00:01:52,862
Yeah, and we'll be
right across the hall.
46
00:01:52,929 --> 00:01:54,130
What do you think?
47
00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:55,631
I don't know.
48
00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:59,135
What if living together
kills the romance?
49
00:02:00,737 --> 00:02:03,472
Okay, you guys had sex
one whole time.
50
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,841
Nothing can put out
a fire like that.
51
00:02:05,909 --> 00:02:08,077
Yeah, but what happens
52
00:02:08,145 --> 00:02:10,246
when we each get a peek
behind the curtain?
53
00:02:10,313 --> 00:02:13,082
I mean, she's never even
seen me unshaven.
54
00:02:13,150 --> 00:02:14,950
You just shaved yesterday.
55
00:02:15,018 --> 00:02:16,452
You're good for three months.
56
00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:19,121
Sheldon, I understand
your apprehension,
57
00:02:19,189 --> 00:02:21,290
but let me appeal
to the scientist in you.
58
00:02:21,358 --> 00:02:23,359
Given the five-week end date,
59
00:02:23,427 --> 00:02:26,395
isn't it the perfect opportunity
to consider this an experiment
60
00:02:26,463 --> 00:02:28,431
and collect data
on our compatibility?
61
00:02:28,498 --> 00:02:31,734
Don't try luring me in
with sexy talk.
62
00:02:31,802 --> 00:02:33,202
LEONARD:
Okay.
63
00:02:33,270 --> 00:02:34,703
Star Trek: The Original Series.
64
00:02:34,771 --> 00:02:36,372
The Enterprise was
on a five-year mission
65
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:37,573
to explore new worlds.
66
00:02:37,641 --> 00:02:38,741
Think of this
as your
67
00:02:38,809 --> 00:02:41,110
personal five-week mission
to do the same.
68
00:02:41,178 --> 00:02:45,448
If you want to lure me in with
sexy talk, that's how you do it.
69
00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:49,118
Don't be proud of that.
70
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,121
So, is that a yes?
71
00:02:52,189 --> 00:02:53,456
Not yet. I...
72
00:02:53,523 --> 00:02:56,559
How will I learn if
I'm comfortable living with Amy
73
00:02:56,626 --> 00:02:58,794
or just comfortable because
I'm in my own apartment?
74
00:02:58,862 --> 00:03:01,197
Now, if this experiment
is going to be valid,
75
00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:03,065
I suggest a neutral environment.
76
00:03:03,133 --> 00:03:04,400
Well, where would you go?
77
00:03:04,468 --> 00:03:05,768
Well, ideally, an enclosed,
78
00:03:05,836 --> 00:03:09,738
self-sustaining biodome
in New Mexico.
79
00:03:09,806 --> 00:03:14,143
Where we would eat crops
fertilized with our own waste.
80
00:03:14,211 --> 00:03:17,379
And you were worried
about the romance.
81
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:18,914
PENNY:
Wait.
82
00:03:18,982 --> 00:03:21,917
Why don't you guys stay across
the hall, and we will live here?
83
00:03:21,985 --> 00:03:23,652
Interesting.
84
00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:26,121
If my official residence
were across the hall,
85
00:03:26,189 --> 00:03:30,359
I wonder if I'd need to knock
every time I came over here.
86
00:03:30,427 --> 00:03:32,027
That's a good question.
87
00:03:32,095 --> 00:03:34,163
Maybe just don't come over.
88
00:03:36,399 --> 00:03:39,235
Historically, I don't
do well with change.
89
00:03:39,302 --> 00:03:40,536
Okay, it won't
be that bad.
90
00:03:40,604 --> 00:03:42,114
We wouldn't even sit in
your spot while you're gone.
91
00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:43,706
You're darn right, you wouldn't.
92
00:03:43,773 --> 00:03:46,108
No matter where I am,
this will always be my spot.
93
00:03:46,176 --> 00:03:47,243
Like an embassy
94
00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:48,511
in a foreign country,
95
00:03:48,578 --> 00:03:51,647
this seat is the sovereign
soil of my bottom.
96
00:03:51,715 --> 00:03:54,717
Just nod and smile.
He's almost gone.
97
00:03:56,386 --> 00:03:58,821
Sheldon, what do you think?
98
00:03:58,889 --> 00:04:01,390
(sighs)
99
00:04:01,458 --> 00:04:02,992
Very well. I'm on board.
100
00:04:03,059 --> 00:04:04,426
- Seriously?
- Yes.
101
00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:05,861
I accept this
five-week mission
102
00:04:05,929 --> 00:04:07,997
to share a living space
with my girlfriend.
103
00:04:08,064 --> 00:04:09,465
Oh. This is so exciting.
104
00:04:09,533 --> 00:04:11,700
Well, now, don't be surprised
if, like Star Trek,
105
00:04:11,768 --> 00:04:14,603
it's canceled in three.
106
00:04:15,772 --> 00:04:19,441
I have to say, I am happy
with your ob-gyn.
107
00:04:20,777 --> 00:04:23,879
Cool. 'Cause she says
you're doing a great job as
108
00:04:23,947 --> 00:04:27,016
"weird friend who doesn't have
to be at every appointment."
109
00:04:27,083 --> 00:04:29,518
I'm the son of a gynecologist.
I could be helpful.
110
00:04:29,586 --> 00:04:30,819
BERNADETTE:
It would help
111
00:04:30,887 --> 00:04:34,623
if you stopped telling me
I have a textbook cervix.
112
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,693
The polite response is,
"Thank you for noticing."
113
00:04:40,931 --> 00:04:43,132
Let me see the sonogram again.
114
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:44,466
(laughs)
115
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:47,536
Oh, yeah, that's a good-looking
baby for a little gray blob.
116
00:04:47,604 --> 00:04:50,272
Yeah, we could
name him Blobert.
117
00:04:50,340 --> 00:04:51,941
What if it's a girl?
118
00:04:52,008 --> 00:04:53,742
Bloberta.
119
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:56,478
Or Blobbi with an "I."
120
00:04:56,546 --> 00:05:00,115
Are we being silly
not finding out the sex?
121
00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:02,618
Yeah, I was just
thinking the same thing.
122
00:05:02,686 --> 00:05:04,553
If you want,
you can find out right now.
123
00:05:04,621 --> 00:05:05,955
- Mm.
- Hmm.
124
00:05:06,022 --> 00:05:08,062
The doctor's gone for the
day, so it doesn't matter.
125
00:05:08,091 --> 00:05:09,224
Well, somebody else knows
126
00:05:09,292 --> 00:05:10,993
because they saw it
in the folder.
127
00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:13,028
You looked in
our folder?!
128
00:05:13,096 --> 00:05:14,163
It was an accident.
129
00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,231
The doctor left
the folder out on her desk.
130
00:05:16,299 --> 00:05:19,435
It's not my fault
I opened it and looked.
131
00:05:19,502 --> 00:05:23,138
So you know the sex
of our baby, and we don't?!
132
00:05:23,206 --> 00:05:26,141
Flip a coin.
You got a fifty-fifty shot.
133
00:05:26,209 --> 00:05:28,143
It's unbelievable.
134
00:05:28,211 --> 00:05:29,478
- God, Raj.
- What?
135
00:05:29,546 --> 00:05:30,980
This is not a problem, okay?
136
00:05:31,047 --> 00:05:33,182
If you don't want to know,
I don't have to tell you.
137
00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:35,217
We don't want you to know!
138
00:05:35,285 --> 00:05:37,753
Okay, well, that's a problem.
139
00:05:40,457 --> 00:05:43,692
You know, I'm very proud of you
for trying to live with Amy.
140
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:44,927
- Oh. Thank you.
- Mm.
141
00:05:44,995 --> 00:05:47,062
Of course, the ideal way
to conduct this experiment
142
00:05:47,130 --> 00:05:50,532
would be with four pairs of
identical Sheldons and Amys.
143
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:53,235
One pair that was neither
dating nor living together.
144
00:05:53,303 --> 00:05:55,437
One pair that was dating
but not living together.
145
00:05:55,505 --> 00:05:57,149
One pair that was living
together but not dating.
146
00:05:57,173 --> 00:05:58,293
And then, of
course, one pair
147
00:05:58,341 --> 00:06:00,242
that was living
together and dating.
148
00:06:00,310 --> 00:06:01,644
Although, with
that many Sheldons,
149
00:06:01,711 --> 00:06:04,279
it'd be such a party,
we'd never get anything done.
150
00:06:04,347 --> 00:06:06,682
That was a cute story.
151
00:06:06,750 --> 00:06:08,550
So, um...
152
00:06:10,186 --> 00:06:11,487
What did you want to ask me?
153
00:06:11,554 --> 00:06:14,723
Well, you've lived with your
significant other for some time.
154
00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,759
I would like this
experiment to go well.
155
00:06:16,826 --> 00:06:19,495
Are there any insights
you can share?
156
00:06:19,562 --> 00:06:22,965
Mm. Well, the biggie is,
if she has an insane roommate,
157
00:06:23,033 --> 00:06:24,833
kick him out
as soon as possible.
158
00:06:24,901 --> 00:06:27,803
You know, Leonard
and I were very happy
159
00:06:27,871 --> 00:06:29,605
before you came along.
160
00:06:31,207 --> 00:06:33,042
You've been roommates
with Sheldon forever.
161
00:06:33,109 --> 00:06:35,177
Do you have any advice?
162
00:06:35,245 --> 00:06:37,379
I'm trying to think of an answer
163
00:06:37,447 --> 00:06:39,615
that won't stop you
from doing this.
164
00:06:41,084 --> 00:06:42,384
I know it sounds
like a cliché,
165
00:06:42,452 --> 00:06:43,619
but compromise is key.
166
00:06:43,687 --> 00:06:45,421
Never leave a belt
on the floor.
167
00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:48,323
At night, they
look like snakes.
168
00:06:48,391 --> 00:06:50,893
Do little things, like bring her
a cup of coffee in bed.
169
00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:52,394
Keep M&M'S in your pocket
170
00:06:52,462 --> 00:06:54,463
in case you have to
wait in a long line.
171
00:06:55,732 --> 00:06:57,566
You're gonna be seeing
each other a lot,
172
00:06:57,634 --> 00:06:59,702
so respect each other's
personal space.
173
00:06:59,769 --> 00:07:04,373
He startles easily, so,
please, no flash photography.
174
00:07:07,243 --> 00:07:10,879
How many pairs of underwear
did you pack for the move?
175
00:07:10,947 --> 00:07:13,282
I don't know. I didn't count.
176
00:07:13,349 --> 00:07:16,785
You truly are the Goofus
to my Gallant.
177
00:07:18,254 --> 00:07:20,222
That's me. Listen,
178
00:07:20,290 --> 00:07:24,593
you and I are gonna
be sharing a bed.
179
00:07:24,661 --> 00:07:27,896
You know, this is uncharted
territory for both of us.
180
00:07:27,964 --> 00:07:29,264
How are you feeling about that?
181
00:07:29,332 --> 00:07:32,735
Oh, excited, concerned,
182
00:07:32,802 --> 00:07:33,802
a little scared.
183
00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:35,070
All the same emotions
184
00:07:35,138 --> 00:07:37,306
I feel
in line at Space Mountain.
185
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:42,077
Well, if you're nervous
about the sleeping arrangements,
186
00:07:42,145 --> 00:07:43,812
maybe we should talk about it.
187
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,814
Okay.
188
00:07:48,585 --> 00:07:50,586
Talk.
189
00:07:50,653 --> 00:07:53,956
Well, I imagine
one of your concerns
190
00:07:54,023 --> 00:07:55,758
might be coital
expectations.
191
00:07:55,825 --> 00:07:58,660
Wow, no foreplay or anything,
just right to it.
192
00:08:00,029 --> 00:08:01,764
Look, I know
this experiment
193
00:08:01,831 --> 00:08:04,166
is a big step outside
of your comfort zone.
194
00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:07,636
So why don't we take being
physical off the table
195
00:08:07,704 --> 00:08:09,338
and maybe later on,
196
00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:12,307
once we're more settled in,
we can revisit it.
197
00:08:12,375 --> 00:08:15,144
You're really okay with that?
198
00:08:15,211 --> 00:08:16,779
I've never lived
with someone, either.
199
00:08:16,846 --> 00:08:18,614
This is a lot for me, too.
200
00:08:18,681 --> 00:08:20,082
(sighs)
201
00:08:20,150 --> 00:08:21,350
This is such a relief.
202
00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:23,919
Honestly, if it didn't
get you all worked up,
203
00:08:23,987 --> 00:08:26,655
I'd kiss you right now.
204
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:28,590
Good call.
205
00:08:28,658 --> 00:08:30,425
Seeing your
Teen Titans underwear
206
00:08:30,493 --> 00:08:32,761
really got my
motor running.
207
00:08:32,829 --> 00:08:35,731
I know. They probably shouldn't
sell those to children.
208
00:08:39,402 --> 00:08:40,869
Well, here's your key.
209
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:42,237
Thank you.
210
00:08:42,305 --> 00:08:43,872
Enjoy having the place
to yourselves.
211
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:47,576
You enjoy your mission to boldly
go where no man has gone before.
212
00:08:50,013 --> 00:08:51,513
It's Penny's bedroom.
213
00:08:51,581 --> 00:08:53,448
Plenty of men have gone before.
214
00:08:56,519 --> 00:08:59,955
Now, now, there's no need
to make this emotional.
215
00:09:00,023 --> 00:09:02,858
Shall we?
216
00:09:02,926 --> 00:09:04,993
I guess this is it.
217
00:09:05,061 --> 00:09:05,861
You guys have fun.
218
00:09:05,929 --> 00:09:08,363
You, too.
219
00:09:09,232 --> 00:09:11,300
Oh, don't forget.
220
00:09:11,367 --> 00:09:13,802
Tuesday the air filters
need to be changed.
221
00:09:13,870 --> 00:09:15,537
Yeah, you wrote it on my hand.
222
00:09:15,605 --> 00:09:16,705
Oh.
223
00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:18,207
(chuckles softly)
224
00:09:18,274 --> 00:09:19,575
Oh, and every other day,
225
00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:22,010
check the water level
on the avocado pit.
226
00:09:22,078 --> 00:09:23,245
I'm on it.
227
00:09:23,313 --> 00:09:26,248
15 years from now, we'll
make guacamole together.
228
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:28,317
Leonard, please, let me go.
229
00:09:33,690 --> 00:09:35,624
Come on, Sheldon.
230
00:09:35,692 --> 00:09:37,326
Oh. Bye.
231
00:09:37,393 --> 00:09:39,628
- Good night.
- Good night.
232
00:09:43,566 --> 00:09:45,100
Well, that's it.
233
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:47,936
For the next five weeks, we are
officially living together.
234
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,439
I guess the experiment begins.
235
00:09:50,506 --> 00:09:51,773
PENNY (whoops):
We did it!
236
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,742
LEONARD:
Yeah!
237
00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,041
Which side of the bed
would you prefer?
238
00:10:05,109 --> 00:10:06,710
Doesn't matter to me.
Your choice.
239
00:10:06,777 --> 00:10:09,713
No, no, we're living together
now-- everything's equal.
240
00:10:09,780 --> 00:10:12,148
You know? I know that I have
a tendency to be controlling,
241
00:10:12,216 --> 00:10:13,617
so I would rather
you choose.
242
00:10:13,684 --> 00:10:15,229
Well, Sheldon,
I really appreciate that,
243
00:10:15,253 --> 00:10:17,587
but these things mean more
to you than they do to me,
244
00:10:17,655 --> 00:10:18,889
so whatever you want.
245
00:10:18,956 --> 00:10:20,400
Well, clearly,
it's not whatever I want,
246
00:10:20,424 --> 00:10:22,926
because what I want is for you
to make this decision,
247
00:10:22,994 --> 00:10:24,661
and you refuse to do that.
248
00:10:24,729 --> 00:10:26,062
Well, I'm not refusing.
249
00:10:26,130 --> 00:10:27,898
I'm just trying
to be considerate.
250
00:10:27,965 --> 00:10:29,799
Like when you
let me get those shoes
251
00:10:29,867 --> 00:10:31,201
with the wheels on the bottom,
252
00:10:31,269 --> 00:10:32,946
and then watched me roll
right into traffic?
253
00:10:32,970 --> 00:10:34,298
Sheldon, will you please
just pick a side?
254
00:10:34,322 --> 00:10:35,390
Fine.
255
00:10:40,545 --> 00:10:41,845
(sighs)
256
00:10:41,913 --> 00:10:44,214
Okay. Now, on this side,
257
00:10:44,282 --> 00:10:48,118
I am closer to the exit
in case of emergency.
258
00:10:48,185 --> 00:10:50,287
Great. That's your side.
259
00:10:50,354 --> 00:10:54,457
No, but I'm also closer to
the entrance in case of attack.
260
00:10:54,525 --> 00:10:57,093
Okay, I'll take that side.
261
00:10:57,161 --> 00:10:58,839
Ah, then again, what are
the odds of someone attacking me?
262
00:10:58,863 --> 00:11:00,330
Rising rapidly.
263
00:11:03,234 --> 00:11:06,903
Now, this side offers me
proximity to the bathroom,
264
00:11:06,971 --> 00:11:09,005
but I am closer to the window
265
00:11:09,073 --> 00:11:11,641
where perverts
can watch me sleep.
266
00:11:11,709 --> 00:11:13,610
Okay.
267
00:11:13,678 --> 00:11:16,279
What if we do this?
268
00:11:18,783 --> 00:11:19,783
I suppose that works.
269
00:11:19,850 --> 00:11:20,951
Great.
270
00:11:24,689 --> 00:11:26,189
Although now I'm kind of worried
271
00:11:26,257 --> 00:11:28,124
someone's hiding
behind those drapes.
272
00:11:31,896 --> 00:11:33,663
This is ridiculous.
273
00:11:33,731 --> 00:11:36,967
The doctor knows what the baby
is, the ultrasound tech knows,
274
00:11:37,034 --> 00:11:38,435
Raj knows,
275
00:11:38,502 --> 00:11:42,138
his Grey's Anatomy online
fan group probably knows.
276
00:11:43,341 --> 00:11:45,075
Is it weird we don't?
277
00:11:45,142 --> 00:11:46,443
I don't know.
278
00:11:46,510 --> 00:11:49,145
Maybe the surprise
will make it more fun.
279
00:11:49,213 --> 00:11:50,814
Like magic tricks.
280
00:11:50,881 --> 00:11:52,616
Remember how disappointed
you were
281
00:11:52,683 --> 00:11:55,251
when I explained
the never-ending hanky?
282
00:11:55,319 --> 00:11:57,487
I was disappointed to see
the man I was engaged to
283
00:11:57,555 --> 00:12:00,624
pulling rainbow scarves
out of his fly.
284
00:12:02,126 --> 00:12:05,328
But how delightful
was it when I pulled out
285
00:12:05,396 --> 00:12:07,897
a bouquet
at the end of those scarves?
286
00:12:07,965 --> 00:12:10,233
It'll be the same thing
287
00:12:10,301 --> 00:12:14,104
when the doctor pulls
a beautiful surprise out of you.
288
00:12:15,373 --> 00:12:18,575
Everyone said I could do better.
289
00:12:18,643 --> 00:12:21,745
But you didn't listen,
and presto change-o,
290
00:12:21,812 --> 00:12:24,114
my baby's inside you. Ta-da!
291
00:12:27,118 --> 00:12:28,985
(brushing teeth)
292
00:12:30,755 --> 00:12:32,522
(Amy hawks, spits)
293
00:12:34,425 --> 00:12:36,092
AMY:
Ugh. What is that?
294
00:12:39,797 --> 00:12:41,398
(door opens)
295
00:12:45,269 --> 00:12:46,503
Why'd you switch sides?
296
00:12:46,570 --> 00:12:48,672
Be grateful
I'm still in the room.
297
00:12:55,579 --> 00:12:56,913
Comfy?
298
00:12:56,981 --> 00:12:58,882
Oh, I'm just happy
I don't know
299
00:12:58,949 --> 00:13:01,351
what this memory
foam remembers.
300
00:13:01,419 --> 00:13:02,786
Sheldon?
301
00:13:02,853 --> 00:13:05,321
I know we took coitus
off the table,
302
00:13:05,389 --> 00:13:08,591
but I was wondering how you feel
about other forms of intimacy,
303
00:13:08,659 --> 00:13:09,926
such as snuggling.
304
00:13:09,994 --> 00:13:11,661
Well, it's funny
you should ask,
305
00:13:11,729 --> 00:13:14,164
because I was wondering
how you'd feel
306
00:13:14,231 --> 00:13:17,967
about separating the two
of us with a pillow wall.
307
00:13:19,403 --> 00:13:22,672
Sheldon, I've made more than
enough accommodations for you.
308
00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:24,774
We're both grown adults--
309
00:13:24,842 --> 00:13:26,362
we've been far more
intimate than this.
310
00:13:26,410 --> 00:13:28,144
If you don't want
to snuggle, fine--
311
00:13:28,212 --> 00:13:29,913
but we're not building
a pillow wall.
312
00:13:29,980 --> 00:13:31,181
Okay, well, I am sorry.
313
00:13:31,248 --> 00:13:33,316
I'm just worried that my
sensitivity to temperature
314
00:13:33,384 --> 00:13:35,385
could make this
a rough night.
315
00:13:35,453 --> 00:13:37,587
And no offense, but your
bottom radiates enough heat,
316
00:13:37,655 --> 00:13:39,956
I'm surprised there aren't
iguanas lying on it.
317
00:13:44,528 --> 00:13:46,663
That's it. It's
Sheldon's bedtime.
318
00:13:46,731 --> 00:13:48,198
He is in for the night.
319
00:13:48,265 --> 00:13:51,735
Wow. I cannot believe we are
alone in our own apartment.
320
00:13:51,802 --> 00:13:53,069
(chuckles):
It's weird.
321
00:13:53,137 --> 00:13:54,297
This must be how parents feel
322
00:13:54,338 --> 00:13:57,574
when their kid goes off
to college.
323
00:13:57,641 --> 00:14:01,678
Unless they feel sad--
then it's different.
324
00:14:01,746 --> 00:14:02,879
So, what do you want to do?
325
00:14:02,947 --> 00:14:06,616
I know exactly what
we are gonna do.
326
00:14:06,684 --> 00:14:07,817
Really? You're a genius,
327
00:14:07,885 --> 00:14:10,320
and that's the first thing
you come up with?
328
00:14:11,422 --> 00:14:13,156
Hey, Sheldon's
not here,
329
00:14:13,224 --> 00:14:15,225
so we are going
to put on music
330
00:14:15,292 --> 00:14:17,494
and dance in
our underwear.
331
00:14:18,763 --> 00:14:21,598
Ugh. Can we just have sex?
332
00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:24,267
Oh, don't worry.
333
00:14:24,335 --> 00:14:27,270
Once you see my sweet moves,
sex is inevitable.
334
00:14:29,406 --> 00:14:31,341
(intro to "You Never Can Tell"
playing)
335
00:14:31,408 --> 00:14:33,376
♪ It was a teenage wedding
336
00:14:33,444 --> 00:14:35,612
♪ And the old folks
wished them well ♪
337
00:14:38,215 --> 00:14:39,415
♪ You could see that Pierre
338
00:14:39,483 --> 00:14:43,553
♪ Did truly love
the mademoiselle ♪
339
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:45,755
♪ And now
the young monsieur... ♪
340
00:14:45,823 --> 00:14:47,624
Inevitable, you say?
341
00:14:47,691 --> 00:14:49,325
♪
342
00:14:49,393 --> 00:14:51,594
I'll just let my hips
do the talkin'.
343
00:14:51,662 --> 00:14:54,063
♪ It goes to show
you never can tell... ♪
344
00:14:57,334 --> 00:15:00,069
Screw it. I'm calling
and finding out.
345
00:15:00,137 --> 00:15:01,471
Good. Call him.
346
00:15:05,943 --> 00:15:07,263
Wait, I'm not sure
I want to know.
347
00:15:07,311 --> 00:15:08,878
But you just said
you wanted to know.
348
00:15:08,946 --> 00:15:11,181
Well, now I don't know
if I want to know!
349
00:15:11,982 --> 00:15:13,416
Hello?
350
00:15:13,484 --> 00:15:14,884
Call you back.
351
00:15:16,420 --> 00:15:17,987
No, Dr. Feynman.
352
00:15:18,055 --> 00:15:21,191
If I solve it for you,
you'll never learn.
353
00:15:24,228 --> 00:15:26,229
♪ Tootsee Roll
354
00:15:26,297 --> 00:15:28,431
♪ Tootsee
Roll ♪
355
00:15:28,499 --> 00:15:32,235
♪ Tootsee Roll,
Tootsee Roll... ♪
356
00:15:32,303 --> 00:15:34,337
Wow! Where did you
learn these moves?
357
00:15:34,405 --> 00:15:36,873
The world may have forgotten
about Dance Dance Revolution,
358
00:15:36,941 --> 00:15:38,408
but not this smooth criminal.
359
00:15:38,475 --> 00:15:40,109
♪ To the left, to the left
360
00:15:40,177 --> 00:15:42,378
♪ To the right, to the right,
to the front. ♪
361
00:15:42,446 --> 00:15:44,681
Okay, you're positive
you want to know?
362
00:15:44,748 --> 00:15:47,016
- Yes.
- Okay. Here we go.
363
00:15:47,084 --> 00:15:48,651
It's ringing.
364
00:15:48,719 --> 00:15:50,486
(ringtone playing)
365
00:15:52,056 --> 00:15:53,623
Hello?
366
00:15:53,691 --> 00:15:56,326
- Wait.
- Wrong number.
367
00:15:59,763 --> 00:16:01,931
(moans)
368
00:16:04,702 --> 00:16:06,569
(moans)
369
00:16:10,241 --> 00:16:12,041
(moans)
370
00:16:14,912 --> 00:16:17,280
(moans)
371
00:16:19,350 --> 00:16:21,017
(moans)
372
00:16:28,726 --> 00:16:30,293
(moans)
373
00:16:31,395 --> 00:16:32,862
(inhales)
374
00:16:34,498 --> 00:16:37,767
I told you
not to do the worm.
375
00:16:37,835 --> 00:16:40,503
(holding breath):
You were right.
376
00:16:41,805 --> 00:16:43,573
(ringtone playing)
377
00:16:44,909 --> 00:16:46,109
Hello.
378
00:16:46,176 --> 00:16:49,212
BERNADETTE: I changed my mind!
Hang up! Hang up!
379
00:16:57,755 --> 00:16:59,055
Oh.
380
00:17:05,496 --> 00:17:06,596
Oh.
381
00:17:10,935 --> 00:17:12,468
Oh, gee-- oh!
382
00:17:16,941 --> 00:17:18,741
What are you doing down there?
383
00:17:18,809 --> 00:17:19,809
Hang on.
384
00:17:19,877 --> 00:17:20,944
Who are you calling?
385
00:17:21,011 --> 00:17:22,178
(click)
(screams)
386
00:17:34,451 --> 00:17:36,085
I'm so sore.
I don't think
387
00:17:36,153 --> 00:17:38,221
I slept two minutes last night.
388
00:17:43,994 --> 00:17:45,995
Yeah, get it, girl.
389
00:17:47,064 --> 00:17:49,899
It's not what you think.
390
00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:51,934
I feel like
I pulled something.
391
00:17:52,002 --> 00:17:54,103
Why didn't you tell me to stop?
392
00:17:55,305 --> 00:17:57,740
Even more not
what you think.
393
00:17:58,675 --> 00:18:00,510
I don't know
if I can make it
394
00:18:00,577 --> 00:18:02,345
through five weeks
living with him.
395
00:18:02,413 --> 00:18:04,628
If you ever need a break,
the owner of the train store
396
00:18:04,629 --> 00:18:06,308
will let you leave him there
while you get a coffee.
397
00:18:06,332 --> 00:18:07,793
Yeah.
398
00:18:08,852 --> 00:18:10,153
Good morning.
399
00:18:10,220 --> 00:18:12,321
See? I didn't knock,
but it's fine.
400
00:18:12,389 --> 00:18:15,291
I didn't knock, but it's fine.
I didn't knock, but it's fine.
401
00:18:15,359 --> 00:18:17,960
So, how is everyone?
402
00:18:18,028 --> 00:18:20,229
Miserable and exhausted.
403
00:18:20,297 --> 00:18:21,831
Really? I slept great.
404
00:18:21,899 --> 00:18:24,934
Well, I didn't,
and it's your fault.
405
00:18:25,002 --> 00:18:27,837
How? You had the whole floor
to yourself.
406
00:18:30,107 --> 00:18:33,476
(sighs) Sheldon, maybe living together
is a bad idea.
407
00:18:33,544 --> 00:18:36,112
Well... Yeah, but what kind
of scientists would we be,
408
00:18:36,180 --> 00:18:39,282
drawing a conclusion
after only 12 hours of data?
409
00:18:39,349 --> 00:18:42,718
The kind who almost put a pillow
over your face last night.
410
00:18:44,354 --> 00:18:45,655
Wow.
411
00:18:45,722 --> 00:18:47,623
I anticipated
we'd have problems,
412
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:51,227
but I never thought your
scientific rigor would be one of them.
413
00:18:51,295 --> 00:18:54,797
I'm sorry, are you questioning
my integrity as a scientist?
414
00:18:54,865 --> 00:18:57,834
If the lab room
disposable shoe cover fits.
415
00:18:59,002 --> 00:19:00,670
Was that a science diss?
416
00:19:00,737 --> 00:19:01,904
- Yeah.
- Was it a good one?
417
00:19:01,972 --> 00:19:03,673
- Eh.
- Ah.
418
00:19:03,740 --> 00:19:05,274
What would a
theoretical physicist
419
00:19:05,342 --> 00:19:07,143
understand about an
experiment anyway?
420
00:19:07,211 --> 00:19:09,091
I mean, you wouldn't know
a confounding variable
421
00:19:09,146 --> 00:19:12,281
if two of them hit you in
the face at the same time!
422
00:19:13,851 --> 00:19:15,384
And you don't even
get that joke,
423
00:19:15,452 --> 00:19:18,688
'cause you don't even work
with confounding variables!
424
00:19:19,556 --> 00:19:21,190
How dare you?
425
00:19:21,258 --> 00:19:23,392
Oh, you heard me.
Your experimental bona fides
426
00:19:23,460 --> 00:19:24,694
are laughable.
427
00:19:24,761 --> 00:19:27,430
Whoa, whoa! Now you're
making fun of my bona fides?
428
00:19:27,498 --> 00:19:30,233
Can't make fun of something
that's a null set.
429
00:19:31,368 --> 00:19:32,869
PENNY:
I feel like
430
00:19:32,936 --> 00:19:34,337
I should say "damn."
- Do it.
431
00:19:34,404 --> 00:19:36,038
Damn!
432
00:19:36,106 --> 00:19:39,339
Well, if you are so protective
of the scientific method,
433
00:19:39,340 --> 00:19:41,066
perhaps we should use
the next five weeks
434
00:19:41,090 --> 00:19:42,912
to finish what we started.
435
00:19:42,913 --> 00:19:44,914
Well, for science, maybe I will!
436
00:19:44,982 --> 00:19:46,482
For science, maybe you should!
437
00:19:46,550 --> 00:19:47,250
- Fine!
- Fine!
438
00:19:47,317 --> 00:19:48,851
- Good.
- Great.
439
00:19:48,919 --> 00:19:50,987
Do you want to go to our place
and make out?
440
00:19:51,054 --> 00:19:52,855
Does Stephen Hawking roll
through the quad?
441
00:19:59,963 --> 00:20:02,665
The new neighbors
are weird.
442
00:20:03,778 --> 00:20:10,578
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man