1 00:00:02,169 --> 00:00:04,463 So, I'm happy to be here. 2 00:00:05,214 --> 00:00:07,299 It's very nice to see all of you. 3 00:00:07,633 --> 00:00:08,717 You're all looking well. 4 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,261 Today is a "women in the workplace" thing. 5 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:14,890 Jan's coming in from corporate to talk to all the women about... 6 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,227 I don't really know what. 7 00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:21,897 But Michael's not allowed in. She said that about five times. 8 00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:25,526 Women today, though we have the same options as men, 9 00:00:25,609 --> 00:00:28,862 we often face a very different set of obstacles 10 00:00:28,946 --> 00:00:30,781 In getting there. So... 11 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,133 Hey, what's going on? Michael... 12 00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:34,302 Yeah, you know what? I thought we agreed you wouldn't be here. 13 00:00:34,326 --> 00:00:37,412 I thought about it. I just have a few things I want to say. 14 00:00:37,496 --> 00:00:39,873 What are you doing? Just hear me out. 15 00:00:39,957 --> 00:00:42,167 What is more important than quality? 16 00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:43,502 Equality. 17 00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:48,298 Now, studies show that today's woman, the ally mcbeal woman, as I call her, 18 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:49,508 is at a crossroads. 19 00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:51,718 Michael... and... no, just... 20 00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:53,512 You have come a long way, baby. 21 00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:56,181 But I just want to keep it within reason. Jan: Michael. 22 00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:58,826 They did this up in Albany... you are not allowed in this session, okay? 23 00:00:58,850 --> 00:00:59,970 And they ended up turning 24 00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:02,247 the break room into a lactation room, which is disgusting. 25 00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:03,915 Now you're really not allowed in this session. 26 00:01:03,939 --> 00:01:06,400 Well, I'm their boss. I am your boss. 27 00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,925 Anybody want any coffee or anything? We're fine, Michael. 28 00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:15,325 We just need you to leave, please. 29 00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:17,035 Michael: Women in the workplace. 30 00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:21,081 Yeah. Translation, I have been banned from my own conference room 31 00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,208 so that jan can talk in secret to all the girls. 32 00:01:23,292 --> 00:01:25,669 Whoa, sorry. Women of the workplace. 33 00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,004 About what? I don't know. 34 00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:28,880 Clothes. Me. 35 00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:33,552 Ladies, I am so, so sorry. 36 00:01:34,011 --> 00:01:37,097 Can we start again? We were on such a roll. 37 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:38,265 I really apologize... jan? 38 00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:39,891 For that. Yes, Pam? 39 00:01:40,058 --> 00:01:42,352 Michael's still at the door. Michael! 40 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:16,345 Jan: So, one obstacle 41 00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:19,723 is how assertiveness is perceived differently in men and women. 42 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:23,101 Men who are assertive tend to be admired. They're called... 43 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:25,145 Anyone? 44 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,397 That's a terrible idea. 45 00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:28,899 Jim: What is? 46 00:02:29,024 --> 00:02:30,859 Them in there all together. 47 00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:34,529 They stay in there too long, they're gonna get on the same cycle. 48 00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:37,032 Wreak havoc on our plumbing. 49 00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:40,994 Everyone? Guys? Circle up, please. 50 00:02:41,953 --> 00:02:43,705 Come on over. Bring your chairs. 51 00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:45,624 Toby? Come on over. 52 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:48,835 You're a guy, too. Sort of. 53 00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:50,962 Michael: Let's do this! 54 00:02:51,213 --> 00:02:55,467 Well, first of all, I just want to warm up a little bit. Let's just clap. 55 00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,260 Let's just clap. Ready? 56 00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,681 Yeah! Yeah! That's what I'm talking about! 57 00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:02,844 Okay, I don't know what you're doing here, Michael... 58 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:04,893 Just having a little "guys in the workplace" thing. 59 00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:09,064 But it's very disruptive. Why can't boys play with dolls? 60 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,317 Why does society 61 00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:14,653 force us to use urinals, 62 00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:16,214 when sitting down is far more comfortable? 63 00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:17,882 Can you please do this somewhere else, Michael? 64 00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:19,950 We have nowhere else, jan. 65 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:22,411 This... we could do it in the warehouse. 66 00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:24,180 Dwight. Excellent idea. Go to the warehouse. 67 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:26,957 Okay, fine. Actually, perfect. Perfect. 68 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:31,294 You know what? There is another side to this place, gentlemen. 69 00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:35,173 And I know we all love our cushyjobs and our fun, exciting office, 70 00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:37,342 but do you realize that underneath us, 71 00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:38,760 there's another world? 72 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:40,262 The warehouse world. 73 00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:44,808 A world that is teeming with sweat and dirt and life. 74 00:03:46,101 --> 00:03:47,269 Life. 75 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,396 The bowels of the office. 76 00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:53,442 Michael: These guys are down there, they are real men, doing real men's work. 77 00:03:53,525 --> 00:03:56,695 We are going to learn how a warehouse works. 78 00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:01,575 I think this is gonna work out great. 79 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:05,454 Because managing the warehouse is a very important part of my job, 80 00:04:05,537 --> 00:04:07,706 and I haven't been there in months. 81 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,399 Remember on lost when they met the others? 82 00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:38,862 I am so sorry about that. 83 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:42,949 So, where were we? Pam, are you okay taking notes, then? 84 00:04:43,492 --> 00:04:44,618 Please? Yeah. 85 00:04:44,701 --> 00:04:46,077 Thank you very much. 86 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,829 So, let's meet the warehouse! 87 00:04:47,913 --> 00:04:49,706 Let's get some shots. 88 00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:52,125 Pan around there. 89 00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:55,629 This is Darryl. One of our warehouse staff. 90 00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:58,173 Darryl, what is your biggest fear? 91 00:04:58,256 --> 00:05:00,258 My biggest fear is that someone will distract us 92 00:05:00,342 --> 00:05:02,612 from getting all the shipments out on time. You know what? 93 00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:06,348 Darryl is actually the foreman here, and not Roy, which is cool. 94 00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:08,391 There's Roy, riding the big rig. 95 00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:12,270 So, Roy is actually going to be marrying Pam sometime this summer. 96 00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,815 And she's our receptionist. 97 00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,733 Sort of a "Brangelina" thing. 98 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,905 "Brangelina" is the Brad Pitt and Angelina. I don't understand. 99 00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:25,742 Roy... Roy and Pam. Wsa"ramfi it's a "ram" thing. 100 00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:28,495 I bet Roy heard about you liking Pam. 101 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,748 I bet he'll try to beat you up. 102 00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:34,042 Thanks for the heads up, kev. 103 00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:36,211 I got your back, if he does. 104 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,258 But try to stay out of it. 105 00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:44,737 Just in case there's somebody down here who shouldn't be. 106 00:05:44,761 --> 00:05:46,972 A little good will hunting situation. 107 00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,557 All right. Troops. 108 00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:52,018 This is an important day, a big day. 109 00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:55,605 Now, you may look around 110 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,482 and see two groups here. 111 00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,860 White collar, blue collar. 112 00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:02,654 But I don't see it that way. And you know why not? 113 00:06:03,238 --> 00:06:04,990 Because I am collar-blind. 114 00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:11,162 Why don't we go around the table and all say something that we know we're good at? 115 00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:13,832 I will start. I am good at public speaking. 116 00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,668 Hi. I'm Meredith, and I'm an... 117 00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:18,837 Good at supplier relations. 118 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,297 Jan: Great! Phyllis? 119 00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,340 I'm good at computer stuff. 120 00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:25,260 E-mails, spreadsheets. All that. 121 00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:26,428 Really? 122 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:28,001 I don't know. I thought that... 123 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,472 Jan: No. Okay. Stop. 124 00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:30,867 Phyllis: You know, I've seen some of your spreadsheets, 125 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:33,035 and I almost always... really? I thought they were pretty... 126 00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:36,062 I don't know how I fit in with these women 127 00:06:36,146 --> 00:06:38,064 here, or with jan. 128 00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,693 I mean, we get along great. Fine. 129 00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:46,531 I guess the person I have the most in common with is... 130 00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:50,076 Jim Halpert! 131 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,662 Hey, I, you know, 132 00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:56,541 heard there's a rumor going around about you used to have a crush on Pam and... 133 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,251 Oh, no, no. No, nojtscool 134 00:06:58,335 --> 00:06:59,878 'cause I know you're a good guy, 135 00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:02,213 and I know that that crush ended a long time ago. 136 00:07:02,297 --> 00:07:04,758 So, you know, we're cool. All right? 137 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,510 Yeah. No, yeah. Definitely. 138 00:07:07,594 --> 00:07:10,055 You know, it's great with me. 'Cause that way... 139 00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:12,366 I'm glad she has a friend at work she can get through the day with. 140 00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:14,392 And then she's not all "bap, bap, bap, bapfl oh. 141 00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:16,871 You know, when she gets home. Yeah. I like talking to her, too. 142 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:20,607 So, we're cool, right? Yes. Yeah. 143 00:07:20,982 --> 00:07:23,360 Yup. Cool, man. Good. All right. Sweet. 144 00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:33,745 Hey, Mike, look. How about we go upstairs, too? 145 00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:36,081 You know, learn how an office works. Oh, well. 146 00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:38,500 We can both switch places for the day. Okay. Yeah. 147 00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:41,044 You know what? I don't... You... your... 148 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,504 My job sucks compared to this. 149 00:07:42,587 --> 00:07:44,065 I don't think you'd like it up there. An experience... 150 00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:46,299 Guys! Want to start unloading the truck? 151 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,011 Okay. Let's go. 152 00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:51,680 Step up. 153 00:07:51,763 --> 00:07:53,139 Check this out. 154 00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:54,933 Look at that. Look at that. 155 00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:58,561 Hello, how are... okay. 156 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,567 That's great. That is good stuff. 157 00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:08,530 In five years, I'd like to be five years sober. 158 00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,740 That is an excellent goal. 159 00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,325 Four and a half. 160 00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:13,702 I'll tell you one thing. 161 00:08:13,785 --> 00:08:17,622 I am not gonna be one of those women schlepping her kids around in a minivan. 162 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:18,790 Jan: Great. 163 00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:22,127 I want an SUV with three rows of seats. 164 00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:23,437 Woman: That would be great. 165 00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:24,462 I'll be honest. 166 00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:27,841 One of the goals of these women's seminars is to feel out if there's any standouts, 167 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:30,844 women who could be a valuable addition to our corporate life. 168 00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:38,560 Michael wants us to bond, so we need topics for conversation. 169 00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:39,644 Ponies. 170 00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:41,813 How about rainbows? 171 00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:44,774 Flowers. No! 172 00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:46,502 That's dangerous, Mike. Come on, get down off the lift. 173 00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:48,004 Hey, you're gonna hurt yourself. Mike! 174 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,238 Stand clear. Mike, get off of the lift. Please! 175 00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:52,198 Come on, now. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. 176 00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:54,367 Look, would you... look_. 177 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,768 We'll get somebody to clean that up. 178 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:05,170 We're the ones that gotta clean that up! 179 00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:06,921 Damn it, Michael! 180 00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:09,507 Michael: We have to have this thing serviced. 181 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,886 So, guys' gripe session. 182 00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,304 Here we are. 183 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:18,099 Now, we definitely live in different worlds, 184 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,435 but we have a lot in common. 185 00:09:20,769 --> 00:09:23,772 We even like the same girls, some of us. 186 00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:27,233 And that's gonna happen. You know, we're guys, so... 187 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,444 Hey, do you want me to go? 188 00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,781 No, why would I? You can... 189 00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:35,200 I'll go... stay, or... 190 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,745 And a big walk-in closet. 191 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:41,539 Oh, that's part of my dream, too. Kelly: Oh, me, too. 192 00:09:41,664 --> 00:09:43,166 Great. Great. 193 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:46,669 And, Pam? What about you? What is your dream? 194 00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:51,549 Well, I always dreamed of a house with a terrace upstairs. 195 00:09:51,883 --> 00:09:55,261 Plant flowers on it, stuff like that. Since I was a girl. 196 00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,307 More seriously, though, 197 00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:01,267 a husband that I love. 198 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:02,602 Roy. 199 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,563 And I love to draw. 200 00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:09,484 And I did a little in college, and I'd still love to do something 201 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,848 where I could work with art or graphic design in some way. 202 00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:13,363 She's real good. Thanks. 203 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:17,325 You know, the company is offering a design training program in New York. 204 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:19,119 Well, I have a job right now. 205 00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:22,163 So, I can't really take time off. Well, it's only on weekends. 206 00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:24,207 And then a few weeks in New York, 207 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:27,001 but I'm sure that I could ask corporate to help you out. 208 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:29,146 Well, it's just that the weekends aren't good because... 209 00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:32,215 There are always a million reasons not to do something. 210 00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,846 Let's start with the warehouse. 211 00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:40,348 What bothers you as guys? You know? 212 00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:41,933 My priority is safety. 213 00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:43,017 Okay. 214 00:10:43,101 --> 00:10:46,122 So it really bothers me when somebody comes in here, speeding around on the lift, 215 00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:48,290 playing with it like a toy. It kind of gets under my skin. 216 00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:49,899 Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 217 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:51,734 Don't shush me. 218 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,611 No, that was just... That bothers me, too. 219 00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:55,738 I was breathing. Pam shushes me. It drives me crazy. 220 00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:57,782 I hate shushing. You know, that's the thing. 221 00:10:57,866 --> 00:11:02,078 What... okay. What is our beef, as human men? 222 00:11:02,245 --> 00:11:04,956 You know, that's a good question, Hasselhoff. 223 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,294 Okay. All right. Lonny: What bugs us? 224 00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,588 Good. Guys ragging on each other. 225 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:14,507 That's what guys do, and we love it. 226 00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:18,052 All right. Let's talk about clothing. 227 00:11:18,887 --> 00:11:21,806 I'm excited about today. I love girl talk. 228 00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:25,602 Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. 229 00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:29,165 All right, you can use your clothing to send a message about your ambitions 230 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:32,692 by wearing clothes that reflect what you aspire to be. 231 00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:34,819 I'm not gaining anything from this seminar. 232 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,821 I'm a professional woman, 233 00:11:36,905 --> 00:11:38,323 the head of accounting. 234 00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:40,950 I'm in the healthiest relationship of my life. 235 00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:44,204 I just think it's insulting that jan thinks we need this. 236 00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:47,874 And apparently, judging from her outfit, 237 00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:50,168 jan aspires to be a whore. 238 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:54,505 I hate it when girls insist on taking them out to new restaurants 239 00:11:54,589 --> 00:11:55,715 every weekend night, 240 00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:58,426 and then they're like, "when are we gonna go on a date-date?" 241 00:11:58,509 --> 00:12:00,762 I hate that, too! I hate that, too! 242 00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:02,639 That sucks so hard. It totally sucks! 243 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:05,242 Yeah, and then they make you drive them to church the next morning. 244 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,643 Like, gas ain't free. 245 00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:10,980 Yeah, on our salaries, man. What do they expect? 246 00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:12,958 You know, "take us out every weekend," you know what I mean? 247 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:14,543 Michael: I feel you, man. We're not millionaires. 248 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:17,278 Ifeelyou. No, youdont youdontfeelus 249 00:12:17,362 --> 00:12:19,530 how can you? You know what? Not literally. 250 00:12:19,614 --> 00:12:20,657 You say we're the same, 251 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,909 but we get compensated very differently. Yes. 252 00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:25,954 We work the same hours as you, and you just said we work a lot harder. 253 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:28,915 You do. So... But we get paid a lot less. 254 00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:30,124 Word. 255 00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:32,210 Like, next to no benefits. Michael: I know. 256 00:12:32,293 --> 00:12:34,003 God, what is that? Exactly. 257 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:35,713 It blows. It blows, man! 258 00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:38,383 You know, this would not happen if we had a union. 259 00:12:38,466 --> 00:12:39,884 That's what I'm talking about. 260 00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:42,220 Absolutely, that's what we need to do. You're right. 261 00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:44,472 See, that's what I've been saying, man. 262 00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:45,723 We need to do this, finally. 263 00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:47,183 You know what, is that necessary? 264 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,936 'Cause you already, sort of, have a union of guys. 265 00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:52,772 It's more than necessary, Mike. We need this. 266 00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:53,898 Roy? Yeah? 267 00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,876 Do you still have that card from the dockworkers' union? 268 00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:57,735 Dockworkers? In my truck. 269 00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,904 Come on, man. Yeah. 270 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:02,591 Michael: You know what? I think our problem is the chicks. 271 00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,367 The problem is the chicks. Union! Yeah! 272 00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,536 And you gotta blame them. 273 00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:10,415 Are you with us, Mike? Yeah... 274 00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:13,167 Welcome to the warehouse. 275 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:17,672 Michael! Michael! Michael! Michael! 276 00:13:19,007 --> 00:13:22,552 Another issue is inequality of pay between men and women. 277 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,572 I'm sure that all of you have dealt with that before. 278 00:13:25,596 --> 00:13:28,141 This is important. Ladies, take a breather. 279 00:13:28,766 --> 00:13:30,393 Jan, I 280 00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,478 wanted... 281 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:34,814 Can I help you? 282 00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:40,820 I wanted to say that the guys downstairs are thinking about forming a union, 283 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:42,464 and they have some good points. What? A union? 284 00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:43,674 Don't get hysterical. I'm not. 285 00:13:43,698 --> 00:13:46,576 Part of my job is knowing how to talk to women. 286 00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:49,287 Let's be rational here. 287 00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:51,724 What are the pros? What are the cons? 288 00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:54,751 The cons are that everyone will lose their job, Michael. Everyone. 289 00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:56,753 Office, warehouse... 290 00:13:57,253 --> 00:14:00,965 What do you think the pros are here? 291 00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:04,385 Don't talk to me that way, please. Just... 292 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,387 They're gonna want to hear this from you. 293 00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:08,032 You got yourself into this, Michael, so... 294 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:10,659 We're bonding down there... you get yourself out of it. That's too bad. 295 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:13,329 I just don't want to have to tell them something they're not gonna want to hear. 296 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,205 Now who's getting hysterical? Okay. Come on, jan. 297 00:14:15,229 --> 00:14:17,732 After all we've been through... Michael, Michael... 298 00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:20,193 We have a history. We have a history between us. 299 00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:22,403 Michael. Don't say another word. 300 00:14:22,487 --> 00:14:24,572 Get yourself downstairs. 301 00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:27,950 I'm just saying that we have something. Okay. Whatever. 302 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:32,121 You know what? 303 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:35,500 We could get this done a lot quicker if we formed a type of assembly line. 304 00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:39,170 This here is a "run out the clock" situation. 305 00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:41,339 Just like upstairs. 306 00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:44,175 Sports metaphors are one of the ways 307 00:14:44,258 --> 00:14:46,195 women feel left out of the language of the office. 308 00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:50,181 Now, I know this might sound silly, but many women ask to go over it, so, 309 00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,599 "fumble" means... 310 00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:52,725 Mistake. Slip. 311 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:53,810 Right. 312 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:57,355 "Par for the course" is a golfterm. It means "right on track." 313 00:14:57,814 --> 00:15:00,441 "Below par" means "worse." 314 00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,087 Wait. That should mean better. That doesn't make sense. 315 00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:04,654 What about "second base"? 316 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:08,199 Like, if Michael said he got to second base with you, 317 00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:10,952 does that mean you, like, closed a deal? Excuse me? 318 00:15:11,035 --> 00:15:12,912 I mean, that's a baseball term, right? 319 00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:16,791 I don't know what Michael was talking about. I don't know. 320 00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,877 Kelly: Like, you went to chili's, and he got to second base with you. 321 00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:21,045 Excuse me. 322 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:23,131 Kelly, I don't know what Michael was talking about. 323 00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,067 He just told everybody, and I just want to know if that's... 324 00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:27,135 Hey. Hey. 325 00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:28,803 How's it going down there? 326 00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:32,640 It's a complete... well, actually, it's exactly what you'd expect, so... 327 00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:34,267 How are the girls? Good. 328 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:36,978 We watched a video about our changing bodies. 329 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:38,604 Did you really? No. 330 00:15:38,688 --> 00:15:40,898 Almost. 331 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:44,318 But, hey, something kind of cool, 332 00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:48,197 there's this internship in graphic design that jan was telling us about. 333 00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:50,616 She made it sound, like, really great. 334 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:54,328 Nice! Well, what's it all about? I think you should do it. 335 00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:57,999 That's great! It's really cool. 336 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:01,794 Cold front coming into the warehouse! 337 00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:05,298 Better put on your ski boots! 338 00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:13,139 Happy new year, Darryl. 339 00:16:13,431 --> 00:16:14,682 Hey, Darryl. 340 00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:17,977 You ever done this? 341 00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,814 Are you married? 342 00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:23,357 I'm divorced. 343 00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:24,775 That must have been hard. 344 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:25,902 It was, yes. 345 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,488 You were probably feeling really depressed and sad, 346 00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:30,990 and that's why you did that thing with Michael. 347 00:16:31,073 --> 00:16:34,073 I think you should all spend a little more time thinking about your careers, 348 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:35,578 and less time on personal stuff. 349 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:38,247 I think we're all okay with the balance we've struck. 350 00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,771 Angela: At least you don't have kids. 351 00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,667 You have no kids, right? Thank god. 352 00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:44,712 Okay. Let's take five. I think we could all use five. 353 00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:49,383 How can someone so beautiful be so sad? 354 00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:55,097 Did you take care of the situation? 355 00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:58,684 Yeah. Yeah. Yes. I have... 356 00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:01,437 Excuserne.excuserne. ._essenfiahy, yes, ihavetaken_. 357 00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:04,398 I'm told that there has been some interest in forming a union, 358 00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:06,108 and that Michael supported it. 359 00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,735 Obviously, he's not a friend of yours, 360 00:17:07,818 --> 00:17:10,363 because he didn't tell you the facts. So, let me. 361 00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:13,199 If there is even a whiff of unionizing in this branch, 362 00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:16,077 I can guarantee you the branch will be shut down like that. 363 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,288 They unionized in pittsfield, and we all know what happened in pittsfield. 364 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:23,000 It will cost each of you a fortune in legal fees and union dues, 365 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:25,670 and that will be nothing compared to the cost of losing yourjobs. 366 00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:29,465 So I would think long and hard before sacrificing your savings and your futures 367 00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:31,467 just to send a message. 368 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:35,346 If you have any further questions, you can direct them to... 369 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,432 To Michael. 370 00:17:41,352 --> 00:17:45,648 Pam: Dreams are just that. They're dreams. They help get you through the day. 371 00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:48,776 Like the thing about the terrace. It's nice, 372 00:17:48,859 --> 00:17:50,987 but, I don't know, 373 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:53,573 itwasjust something I read in this book when I was 12. 374 00:17:53,656 --> 00:17:57,451 The girl in the book has a terrace outside of her bedroom, 375 00:17:57,535 --> 00:17:59,870 and she planted flowers on it, 376 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:02,164 and I just loved that. 377 00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:04,333 It just always kind of stuck with me. 378 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,085 So, you're not doing it. 379 00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:09,672 How did you know? 380 00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:11,424 Why not? 381 00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:14,010 It's just, like... No big reason. 382 00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,679 Just a bunch oflnflereasons. Come on. 383 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:21,058 Roy's right. There's no guarantee it's gonna lead to anything, anyway. 384 00:18:21,142 --> 00:18:22,518 Roy said that? 385 00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:26,397 What? You have something you want to say? 386 00:18:27,815 --> 00:18:30,860 You gotta take a chance on something, sometime, Pam. 387 00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:34,405 I mean, do you want to be a receptionist here, always? 388 00:18:34,488 --> 00:18:37,658 Oh, excuse me, I'm fine with my choices. 389 00:18:38,492 --> 00:18:39,619 You are? 390 00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:41,495 Yeah. 391 00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:43,706 It's impractical. 392 00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:47,168 I'm not gonna try to get a house like that. 393 00:18:47,585 --> 00:18:50,254 They don't even make houses like that in Scranton. 394 00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:52,256 So, I'm never gonna... 395 00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:01,349 I'm just gonna put this over there. 396 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,269 This is not a good idea, right here. 397 00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:09,732 Easy does it. Okay. 398 00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:18,741 Pizza. Great equalizer. 399 00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:22,495 Rich people love pizza. Poor people love pizza. 400 00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:25,373 White people love pizza. Black people love pizza. 401 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,958 Do black people like pizza? 402 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,054 Hey. 403 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,349 Look, guys, I'm sorry. 404 00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:47,186 Sometimes jan can be such a bitch. 405 00:19:47,645 --> 00:19:49,355 Yeah. Yeah. 406 00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:51,440 Hey, watch it. Watch it. 407 00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:52,942 We have a relationship. 408 00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:54,735 Thank you to our hosts. 409 00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,278 Darryl: Hey, Michael! 410 00:19:56,821 --> 00:19:58,197 This ain't over. 411 00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:07,998 Excehent 412 00:20:08,082 --> 00:20:11,252 is it good to be back? Yeah. I mean, I love the guy stuff, 413 00:20:11,335 --> 00:20:14,004 but to run an office, you need men and women. 414 00:20:14,088 --> 00:20:15,297 You know why? 415 00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:18,759 Because you need to have that crazy sexual tension 416 00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,636 to keep things interesting. 417 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,399 Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. 418 00:20:35,401 --> 00:20:36,819 Hold, please. 419 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:45,494 Snow angels. Snow angels.