1 00:00:03,921 --> 00:00:06,298 Dunder Mifflin. This is Rolando. 2 00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:09,259 Oh, yes. She's been expecting your call. 3 00:00:12,304 --> 00:00:13,680 Karen: Yeah? 4 00:00:13,764 --> 00:00:16,058 Karen? He's on line 1. 5 00:00:16,141 --> 00:00:18,018 Thanks, ro. 6 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:21,897 Hey. We finally connected. How's Scranton? 7 00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:24,942 Karen: I am the regional manager of dunder Mifflin, utica branch. 8 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,111 Turns out it's a pretty easy gig when your boss isn't an idiot 9 00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,697 and your boyfriend's not in love with somebody else. 10 00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:33,575 Look, all I'm saying is it would be a great opportunity 11 00:00:33,659 --> 00:00:37,746 and we'd love to have you come aboard. 80 think about it, okay? 12 00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:41,208 Okay. Bye. 13 00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:45,879 Look, for the record, a certain Scranton salesman approached me, okay? 14 00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:47,297 Michael: This is perfect. 15 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:48,483 Dwight: He looks like your twin. 16 00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:51,760 This is a dummy, a la Ferris Bueller's day off. 17 00:00:51,843 --> 00:00:54,513 We have tied a string to the wrist, which goes to the door. 18 00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:56,932 When somebody opens the door, the hand goes down, 19 00:00:58,100 --> 00:01:01,478 Hits the remote, turns on the tape recorder, which is me snoring. 20 00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:05,357 Now, nobody knows whether I am here or whether I am gone. 21 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:08,652 I'll know. But you will not tell anyone. 22 00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:10,880 I won't need to because we'll be together playing hooky. 23 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:11,905 Well... yeah! 24 00:01:11,989 --> 00:01:14,950 Sometimes. Most of the time I will be with Ryan. Or Darryl. 25 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,243 Yes. 26 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,328 Oh, good, good. Stanley. First victim. 27 00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:19,788 This is what I want you to do. 28 00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:22,124 Go out, come back in. We're gonna hide. 29 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,018 I want you to tell me if this looks like me, okay? 30 00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,794 I don't understand why sleeping atyourdesk 31 00:01:25,877 --> 00:01:27,021 is better than you not being here. 32 00:01:27,045 --> 00:01:29,006 Just go out and come back in. 33 00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:34,011 I got an offer from utica for more money. And I'm going to take it. 34 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:35,262 What? 35 00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,716 Hi, everyone, can I have your attention, please? 36 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:18,305 I just thought you all should know that Stanley Hudson is planning on leaving us 37 00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:20,599 because our old friend, Karen from utica, 38 00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:23,393 is going to give him more money to work there. 39 00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:26,313 Dmhght10kay no. No, no, no! 40 00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:29,149 No! You completely misinterpreted my tone! 41 00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:31,443 This is a horrible thing. 42 00:02:31,526 --> 00:02:36,406 Clearly, Karen is trying to get back at us because Jim dumped her. 43 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,884 Oh, I don't think that's what's happening. 44 00:02:37,908 --> 00:02:40,452 Okay, well, smarty pants, then why? 45 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:43,997 Why is she trying to take Stanley from us? 46 00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:45,791 I think it's because of my sales record. 47 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:48,960 That could not possibly be it. 48 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:53,006 You cannot take the hilarious black guy from the office. 49 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:56,468 Stanley is part of what makes this branch so extraordinary. 50 00:02:56,551 --> 00:03:01,473 The bluesy wisdom, the sassy remarks, the crossword puzzles, 51 00:03:01,556 --> 00:03:05,102 the smile, those big, watery, red eyes. 52 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:07,521 I don't know how George Bush did it when Colin Powell left. 53 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:11,233 And if utica thinks that they are going to poach Stanley, 54 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:12,734 they have another thing coming. 55 00:03:19,241 --> 00:03:21,159 How can I get you to stay? Money. 56 00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:24,413 Yeah. We all want money. 57 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,833 But there is none in the budget. So, 58 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:29,292 tell me why you're really leaving. 59 00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,752 Money. 60 00:03:31,086 --> 00:03:32,921 Mo' money, mo' problems, Stanley. 61 00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:37,259 You of all people should know that. Let me ask you this, if I were... 62 00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:38,844 Money. Okay. 63 00:03:40,595 --> 00:03:42,806 Oscar, did you bring it? 64 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,811 To be edwardian. His best work. 65 00:03:48,145 --> 00:03:50,564 Okay. Well, I have the tablecloth. Don't forget the flatware. 66 00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:51,773 Sure thing, Pam. Can't wait. 67 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:56,027 Oscar, Toby and I are founding members of the finer things club. 68 00:03:56,278 --> 00:03:59,990 We meet once a month to discuss books and art, celebrate culture 69 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,783 in a very civilized way. 70 00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:07,247 Sometimes the debate can get heated, but we 're always respectful. 71 00:04:07,706 --> 00:04:11,376 There is no paper, no plastic and no work talk allowed. 72 00:04:13,462 --> 00:04:15,130 It's very exclusive. 73 00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:16,923 Besides having sex with men, 74 00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:20,552 I would say the finer things club is the gayest thing about me. 75 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,432 So tell me again why I can't be a part of your club? 76 00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:26,835 Because some people think that you 77 00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:30,103 monopolize the conversation by trying to be funny. 78 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,773 Oscar? Some people. 79 00:04:32,856 --> 00:04:33,940 Karen: Hello? 80 00:04:34,024 --> 00:04:35,817 Filippellers! How are they hanging? 81 00:04:35,901 --> 00:04:37,944 Michael. Michael. To the left? To the right? 82 00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:40,906 Listen, I'm... okay, enough small talk. Go ahead. 83 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:41,990 You called me. 84 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:43,909 Yes. Listen. 85 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,454 You cannot tear Stanley from his family like this. 86 00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:49,956 I'm pretty sure his family is coming with him. 87 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,249 No, his work family. 88 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:55,462 Look, this is very hard for me, but I am going to give you my best man. 89 00:04:55,545 --> 00:04:56,963 You may have Toby. 90 00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:58,715 Toby's not a salesperson. 91 00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:03,512 You can train him. He's very, very smart and funny and charming. 92 00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:08,934 You know, I can't do it. Toby is the worst. 93 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:14,272 That was a bluff. Listen, if you are going to poach one of my guys, 94 00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:15,899 I am going to poach one of yours. 95 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:18,151 Ooh. Goodbye, Michael. 96 00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:19,486 Okay. Goodbye. 97 00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:21,321 Wait! Wait! Karen! 98 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:24,950 Could you transfer me to one of your salespeople, please? Your best one. 99 00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:31,706 I have Ben nugent on the line. He is the top salesman in utica. 100 00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:33,792 Hi, Ben. Michael Scott. Hi, Michael. 101 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:36,169 I am going to cut right to the chase here. 102 00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:39,965 Do you like magic? Because I am a genie in a bottle 103 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:42,509 and I am going to Grant you three wishes, 104 00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:47,264 to move to Scranton, to have a great job and to be my best friend. 105 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,724 Aren't you the guy that hit the woman with your car? 106 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,644 Get out. 107 00:05:52,978 --> 00:05:58,692 Yeah. I also saved her life, but I guess that's not as grabby. 108 00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:01,903 Everyone says Scranton branch is worse than Camden. 109 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,614 Didn't everyone from stamford quit like immediately? 110 00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:07,075 No, ifired them and you're next. 111 00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:12,247 So, what do you say? 112 00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:13,540 Seriously? 113 00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:17,419 Michael: What is that guy talking about? Scranton is not lame. 114 00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:21,840 Scranton is the cool, fun branch. We're like animal house. 115 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:27,888 Found him! Jim! We're getting crapped on. 116 00:06:27,971 --> 00:06:30,891 Word is our branch sucks and we have to do something about it. 117 00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,869 So what are you going to do? What are we going to do? 118 00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:35,729 We are going to make a monster sale is what we're going to do. 119 00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,647 Corcoran dropped staples. Did they? 120 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:41,484 Yes, they did. Oh, yes they did and we are going to murder it. 121 00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:46,489 You, me, Dwight are going to jump in my pt cruiser, we are going to crush this sale. 122 00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:49,993 We are going to prove... What the hell is that music? 123 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,912 It's Vivaldi. For finer things. 124 00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:54,164 That's the problem. That's the problem. 125 00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:58,627 We need rock n' roll, Pam. Rock n' roll. All right? 126 00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:02,297 Oh, my god. 127 00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,968 That's why people are leaving. 128 00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:11,806 I have no words. 129 00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:26,237 We just passed the exit for corcoran. 130 00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:28,823 What? What? We did? 131 00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:32,786 Surprise! Yeah! 132 00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:34,913 Look at his face! Look at his face! 133 00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,057 What are we doing? Egg dripping. 134 00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:37,123 Michael: So psyched. 135 00:07:37,207 --> 00:07:39,084 What are doing, Dwight? What are we doing? 136 00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:42,128 Oh, well, gee, Jim, I don't know. I guess there's no sales call today. 137 00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:46,508 We are going on a panty raid to utica is what we're doing. 138 00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:48,385 We're going to utica? Uh-huh! 139 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:53,223 I'm not going to utica right now. Yes, you are. Oh, buckle up, Jim. 140 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,266 We are going to make Karen wish 141 00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:57,310 that she had never been dumped by you. 142 00:07:57,811 --> 00:08:02,315 Utica! Utica! Utica! Utica! Utica! Utica! 143 00:08:03,441 --> 00:08:04,776 Utica. Utica. 144 00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:07,070 Yow! In yourface! 145 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:11,616 I can't believe you guys. I'm not going to go further piss off my ex-girlfriend. 146 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,427 Are you calling Karen? No, I'm not calling Karen. 147 00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:16,246 He's lying. Yeah. Get it. 148 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,498 What are you doing? Stop it! Dwight! 149 00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:21,459 Are you kidding me? 150 00:08:21,543 --> 00:08:23,628 No communication with the outside world, Jim. 151 00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:26,214 Had to be done. It had to be done. 152 00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:28,174 Well, that kind of sucks 153 00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:31,428 because it had all the photos of my brother's new baby on it. 154 00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:37,100 Oh, that is too bad. Shoot 155 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:49,821 Okay. Hey, Dwight, he found it. 156 00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:51,799 You know what? I'm just going to call a cab from here. 157 00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:54,576 All right. You're going to miss the best prank ever. 158 00:08:54,784 --> 00:09:00,165 All right. Wait, what are you planning on doing? 159 00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:03,330 Do you really want to know? 160 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,377 Oh, god. 161 00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,880 Follow me. Come here. Here's what we brought. 162 00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:09,215 We brought uniforms from the warehouse. 163 00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:10,800 I brought silly string. 164 00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:13,803 Dwight brought gasoline and chunks of rubber to make stink bombs. 165 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,514 Or real bombs. No, no. Not real bombs. 166 00:09:16,598 --> 00:09:18,433 Yeah, come on. It will be so bad ass. 167 00:09:18,516 --> 00:09:21,311 Oh, maybe. I don't know. I don't know. 168 00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:23,688 No. No. It could be bad ass. It will. 169 00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:26,024 Yeah, it will. No, absolutely we're not doing this. 170 00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:29,527 Come on. I already filled the bottles with the gas. It's going to be so bad ass. 171 00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:32,989 Are you kidding me? We've been driving around with this in the trunk the whole time? 172 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:35,700 Michael: Teach her to offer Stanley more money. 173 00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:42,874 So, the deal was Dwight doesn't blow anything up and I wear a costume. 174 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,628 And a mustache. 175 00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:52,133 So, why did you and Karen break up? 176 00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:53,927 Was it the sex? What? 177 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,321 I can't imagine the sex being bad. 178 00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:56,989 I mean, her body is awesome. Okay, you know what? 179 00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,808 Why don't we play that alphabet game that you were talking about? 180 00:09:59,891 --> 00:10:03,686 Okay, I will start. A. 181 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:07,065 A, my name is Alan and my wife's name is Alice 182 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:11,236 we live in Alaska and we sell... 183 00:10:11,319 --> 00:10:13,988 Damn it. What can we sell? 184 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,258 Doesn't matter. I'm trying to think of what we can sell. 185 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:18,201 It doesn't matter. 186 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:24,165 What is that? That sound. The air conditioning leaking or something? 187 00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,584 That doesn't make sense. Couldn't be. 188 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:28,128 What is that? 189 00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,924 Dwight, are you peeing? 190 00:10:33,007 --> 00:10:34,607 I'm peeing in this empty can. Oh, my god! 191 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,636 Oh, come on, man. That is disgusting, Dwight! 192 00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:38,989 You said we couldn't make any more stops. I really had to go. 193 00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:40,282 Michael, watch the road! Oh, god! 194 00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:41,891 Hey, you're making me spray! Oh, my god! 195 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:45,019 I'm going to kill you, man! Michael, Michael, pull over! 196 00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:46,521 Thatisjust so disgusting! Pull over. 197 00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,314 I think I cut my penis on the lid. 198 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:53,194 Can you imagine a life where all you have to do is summer in the Italian countryside? 199 00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:58,366 I know, right? I just want to go and look at art and swim in the adriatic. 200 00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:02,370 And spend time with George Emerson. That's what I would do. 201 00:11:02,579 --> 00:11:04,598 I mean, he's the best male protagonist we've read, right? 202 00:11:04,622 --> 00:11:08,793 Totally. I mean, come on. Such a free spirit. What are you doing? 203 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:12,463 Just came to discuss my favorite e.M. Forster novel 204 00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:18,094 Pam, these finger sandwiches look finger-licking delicious, Pam. 205 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:21,055 I'm sorry, Andy, but this is a closed club. 206 00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:29,230 The finer things club is the most exclusive club in this office. 207 00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:31,608 Naturally, it's where I need to be. 208 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:35,987 The party planning committee is my backup and Kevin's band is my safety. 209 00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:37,155 Fine. 210 00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:42,160 I'iljust... 211 00:11:42,243 --> 00:11:47,665 Sit here in the common area and read my book, 212 00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:50,084 which just happens to be the very same book you're reading. 213 00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:53,046 All right, just know you're not in the finer things club. 214 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,215 Why can't I be in the club? 215 00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,385 I can't believe we're here. I can't believe this is happening. 216 00:11:59,510 --> 00:12:00,845 Dwight: Believe it. 217 00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:02,347 Afro wig? Do you want the afro wig? 218 00:12:02,430 --> 00:12:04,349 No. Michael, I'm not leaving the car. 219 00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:06,476 Yeah. Oh, god. All right, Dwight? 220 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,359 Here's how it's going to go down. You and I... 221 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:10,647 Guy's going by. Shh. 222 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:14,317 You and I are going to sneak inside, pretend that we are warehouse workers. 223 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,903 Then we will silly string the bejesus out of the place. 224 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:20,573 And if we have to defend ourselves, I will stab the security guard in the eye 225 00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:23,952 with a jumbo chalk. No. No, you won't do that. Nope. 226 00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:26,412 Then I'll grind up thejumbo chalk and blow it in his eyes. 227 00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:29,123 Dwight, nothing with the eyes. Please? 228 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,085 Okay, Jim. 229 00:12:33,044 --> 00:12:35,922 Oh, my god, that's her. That's her. Go. Go. Go. Go.Go.Go.Go.Go. 230 00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,466 Dwight: Move. Move. Move. Move. Move. Michael: Shut up. 231 00:12:38,549 --> 00:12:40,189 This is the dumbest thing we've ever done. 232 00:12:50,270 --> 00:12:52,563 Pam: I think it's interesting how forster uses Italy 233 00:12:52,647 --> 00:12:55,858 to represent sexuality and passion 234 00:12:55,942 --> 00:13:00,488 and that also brought up themes of, you know, fate and coincidence 235 00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:02,991 and Lucy's torn between these two things. 236 00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:05,243 She's torn between passion and convention. 237 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:06,703 Kevin: Damn it. 238 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,080 It just... 239 00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:14,711 To be making the case for passion 240 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,796 in edwardian times I thought was... 241 00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,589 Yes! Got it. 242 00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:22,510 Damn it. 243 00:13:24,345 --> 00:13:29,183 Made him sort of ahead of his time as a writer. Very brave choice, I thought, also. 244 00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:34,063 And George's youthfulness, his freedom 245 00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:38,985 Evokesfeehngs_. 246 00:13:42,905 --> 00:13:44,365 What are you microwaving? 247 00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:45,700 Popcorn. 248 00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:48,202 Why don't you use the microwave in the kitchen, Phyllis? 249 00:13:48,286 --> 00:13:51,497 Someone needs to clean it. It smells like popcorn. 250 00:13:58,379 --> 00:14:00,590 So, Stanley, are you really out of here? 251 00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:02,550 Yeah. Looks that way. 252 00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:06,721 I'm going to miss you, man. 253 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:12,101 You've been like an uncle to me. Like a kind old uncle Remus. 254 00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:15,146 I want to stay intouch. 255 00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:21,503 Michael on radio: We are in the stairwell. 256 00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:23,446 Dwight: We 're climbing some stairs. 257 00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:27,676 I am breathing heavily. Okay, you know what? 258 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:30,578 You really don't need to be updating me as much as you're updating me. 259 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:33,901 Michael: There's a guy. There's a guy. Dwight: There's a security guard coming by. 260 00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,585 Hello. We're warehouse workers. Would you like more proof? 261 00:14:38,503 --> 00:14:39,504 Guard: Okay. 262 00:14:39,587 --> 00:14:41,589 Michael: Oh, my god. That was very close. 263 00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:43,233 Dwight: I can see the security guard's eyes. 264 00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:45,510 No.no.dontdo anything to them. 265 00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:47,637 I have to do something to his eyes. 266 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,515 The eyes are the groin of the head. 267 00:14:51,307 --> 00:14:55,144 All right, great Scott, if you found that choking hazard poster, just head on home. 268 00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:59,774 Michael: We've got something far better, their crown Jewel. Their industrial copier. 269 00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:01,984 Isn't that thing huge? 270 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:07,365 It's enormous, but it's got wheels. We 're wheeling it down the hall into the stairwell. 271 00:15:07,865 --> 00:15:10,493 Get the car ready, keep the engine running. 272 00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:13,246 No. That is a terrible idea. Don't do this. 273 00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:16,683 Michael: My hip bone! 274 00:15:16,707 --> 00:15:21,629 We 're wedged between the copier and the railing! I'm stuck. Oh, my left hip! 275 00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:23,982 Dwight: Leave us, Jim! Leave us. Save yourself help us. No! 276 00:15:24,006 --> 00:15:26,259 Don't leave us. Help us. We need help, Jim! 277 00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:29,512 Okay, first of all, stop using my name. And second of all... 278 00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:30,763 Michael: You got to move out! 279 00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:33,391 Damn it, guys. Would you just move over a little bit? 280 00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:34,952 Dwight: I'm losing control of my bladder! 281 00:15:34,976 --> 00:15:37,687 Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Karen's back. 282 00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:41,232 Dwight: Is that Karen? Michael: Take her to a motel. Make love to her, Jim. 283 00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:43,109 No. I'm not doing that. 284 00:15:43,192 --> 00:15:44,819 Just say you want to get back together. 285 00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,320 No. I'm not doing that. 286 00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:49,949 It doesn't have to mean anything. Just do it for Stanley. 287 00:15:50,575 --> 00:15:54,328 Come on, Jim. Just climb on top of her and think about Stanley. Oh, god. 288 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,583 Jim, if this is it for me, promise me something. 289 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,712 Jim? Host the dundies. 290 00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:06,466 Hey, Karen. 291 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:09,969 What are you doing here? 292 00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:11,929 First of all, hi. 293 00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:13,556 What are you doing here? 294 00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:14,849 You good? 295 00:16:16,559 --> 00:16:18,436 I'm just checking on the other branches. 296 00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:21,230 Michael wants me to do that from time to time. So... 297 00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:24,567 Michael: Do not tell Karen about the industrial copier. 298 00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:26,819 Copy that. 299 00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:31,949 I cried for weeks over that guy, so yeah, seeing him climb out of a pt cruiser 300 00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:35,369 in a ladies' warehouse uniform felt pretty good. 301 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:40,082 Let me ask you, did you accomplish what you wanted? 302 00:16:40,249 --> 00:16:43,920 Listen, lady, you can expect these kind of repercussions 303 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,297 as long as you keep trying to poach our people. 304 00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:47,965 I'm taking Stanley. 305 00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:50,927 Then we will burn utica to the ground. 306 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:52,011 Dwight. 307 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,309 Granted, maybe this was not the best idea, 308 00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:02,188 but at least we care enough about our employees 309 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:04,941 that we are willing to fight for them. 310 00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:09,237 And if you so much as harm a hair on Stanley's head, 311 00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:13,574 we will burn utica to the ground. 312 00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:23,417 Jim, hang on a second? Yes. 313 00:17:26,504 --> 00:17:29,966 So you're still doing this kind of stuff, huh? 314 00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,301 Yeah. Trying to quit, though. 315 00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:36,180 If you wanted to see me, you could have just called me like an adult. 316 00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:38,808 Oh, no, I didn't want to see you. 317 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:42,103 Not that I'm not happy to be seeing you right now. 318 00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:45,565 I'm just saying ultimately I was here for the copier. Equal 319 00:17:45,648 --> 00:17:48,484 I'd say it was equal. So, good to see you. 320 00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:53,906 I mean, it's just that, you know, 321 00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:57,952 Pam and I are still dating so... and I just mean that 322 00:17:58,828 --> 00:18:02,707 things are going really well so I didn't want to see you. 323 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:09,213 Oh, things are going really well? Are they? They are? That's great. That's so great. 324 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:11,799 I want to hear more about how happy you are with Pam. 325 00:18:11,882 --> 00:18:15,553 Can you tell me more about that? Thank you so much for coming to utica 326 00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:19,599 and breaking my copier and telling me how well things are going in your relationship. 327 00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:20,933 Really. Thank you. 328 00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:27,565 All right. You are welcome. I am going to go because of traffic. 329 00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:29,650 Traffic. Yeah. Oh, definitely. So... 330 00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:33,279 Go... go because of traffic. Definitely. Beat the traffic. 331 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,823 I will. 332 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,832 We tried and we failed. 333 00:18:47,335 --> 00:18:51,422 Stanley, you may go. 334 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:58,471 Here is a box for your things. 335 00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:05,394 But I doubt that that box will be able to contain all the memories that 336 00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,355 you have of this place. 337 00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:13,069 Fly away, sweet little bird. Fly away and be free. 338 00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:15,905 Pam. 339 00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:20,284 I'm going to need some help writing a want ad. 340 00:19:23,704 --> 00:19:28,709 Wanted. Middle-aged black man with sass. 341 00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:31,921 Big butt. Bigger heart. 342 00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:34,715 I can't do this. 343 00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:37,718 Michael, a word? 344 00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:40,096 Of course. 345 00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:46,018 I changed my mind. I want to keep this job. 346 00:19:47,061 --> 00:19:48,354 Really? 347 00:19:48,437 --> 00:19:52,483 I wasn't really planning on leaving. All I wanted was a raise. 348 00:19:52,566 --> 00:19:58,239 How on earth did Michael call my bluff? Is he some sort of secret genius? 349 00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:02,451 Sometimes I say crazy things. 350 00:20:07,289 --> 00:20:08,374 Hey. 351 00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:11,377 I'm so sorry. Rolando told me everything. 352 00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:14,755 How humiliating. 353 00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:19,176 Would it help you to return to another age, 354 00:20:19,260 --> 00:20:23,597 a time of refinement and civility? 355 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,977 Are you inviting me to the finer things club? 356 00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:29,937 Oh, oh, come on! 357 00:20:32,857 --> 00:20:35,177 Angela's ashes. Top of the morning to it. 358 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:38,195 Frankie's prose is finer than a pot of gold, say I. 359 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:43,033 Okay. Did you get it out of your system? 360 00:20:43,117 --> 00:20:47,538 Yup. No, I mean I really liked it. I thought it was a fun read. 361 00:20:47,872 --> 00:20:48,914 Mmnpmnm. Fun? 362 00:20:48,998 --> 00:20:50,249 Yeah. Really? 363 00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:54,170 What was fun about it for you? Was it the death of the twins? 364 00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:58,549 No, that wasn't fun. 365 00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:00,342 Did you even read it? 366 00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:01,844 Of course I read it. 367 00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:03,095 Oscar: How does it end? 368 00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,930 Who was the main character? 369 00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:10,269 Angela. Nope. The ashes.