1 00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:16,016 This morning, the phone guy comes in 2 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:19,478 and he shows Michael that our phones have a pa function. 3 00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:21,730 And then he just left. 4 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:24,066 Michael on pa: This is your captain speaking. 5 00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:27,736 The office will be flying at an altitude of two stories. 6 00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,696 Look out your left-hand window 7 00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:31,949 and you will see Vance refrigeration. 8 00:00:33,492 --> 00:00:37,579 I am the ghost of salesmen past. 9 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:40,207 Do not come near me. 10 00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:48,799 Yes, Michael Scott for Dr. Johnson, please. 11 00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:52,219 Hello, doctor. I was just following up about my mole again. 12 00:00:52,928 --> 00:00:56,557 Now, I was looking online about sebaceous zits. 13 00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:59,142 I have not been squeezing it. 14 00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:00,936 Could I stick it with a pin? 15 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:04,731 Toby Flenderson to the principal's office. 16 00:01:04,815 --> 00:01:08,068 Your mother called and it appears that you wet the bed again, 17 00:01:08,151 --> 00:01:11,822 so you have to get home to wash your sheets because they're yellow 18 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,949 and they're wet with your urine. 19 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,620 And, at 6'6", 20 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:24,418 from the university of north Carolina, Jim Halpert! 21 00:01:24,501 --> 00:01:25,919 That's pretty funny. 22 00:01:26,003 --> 00:01:29,506 Hey, you know what? Did I drop my... what the heck? 23 00:01:30,173 --> 00:01:32,217 Is that... you find it? 24 00:01:32,301 --> 00:01:34,678 I didn't. I'll look somewhere else. 25 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:36,430 All right. All right. 26 00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:39,224 Would you like fries with that? 27 00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:41,226 Please drive around. 28 00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:14,384 Hello? 29 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:17,804 Good morning. Good morning. 30 00:02:17,888 --> 00:02:19,264 You ready? 31 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:26,146 And we're off. Like a herd of turtles. 32 00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:33,987 Well, Pam and I have eloped. 33 00:02:34,071 --> 00:02:36,782 Actually, we just robbed a bank 34 00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:38,325 and we are on the I am. 35 00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:42,579 No, seriously, I am on a lecture circuit. 36 00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:46,333 Apparently, Scranton has the best sales of any regional branch, 37 00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:50,212 so David Wallace has asked me to go to all the branches 38 00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:54,049 except nashua. Still a little bit raw there. 39 00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:56,176 Um... but I am going to these branches 40 00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:59,471 and I am telling them my secret recipe for success, 41 00:02:59,554 --> 00:03:04,726 my 11 business herbs and spices in a sales batter. 42 00:03:06,269 --> 00:03:09,898 Oh, that. Well, that is Pam. 43 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:13,902 Pam is coming along as my assistant and my driver so I can focus. 44 00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:16,029 And I like to pack heavy. 45 00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:17,364 He brought a sled. 46 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:19,199 No, that is a toboggan. 47 00:03:19,282 --> 00:03:21,402 You never know when you're going to find a snowy hill. 48 00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:24,830 Every magician has a hot assistant 49 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:26,832 and every rock star has a roadie 50 00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:29,334 and Pam is my hot roadie. 51 00:03:29,793 --> 00:03:31,920 Yeah, I love being on the road, 52 00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:33,296 but I especially love 53 00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:34,548 the time and a half pay, 54 00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:36,633 24 hours a day for three days. 55 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:39,386 'Cause I have a mortgage now. Got to bring home the bucks. 56 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,055 No, don't say "bucks." It's not ladylike. 57 00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:48,270 Here we go. Okay, so what we do is we drive all day 58 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,189 and we stay in hotels together at night. Separate rooms. 59 00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,376 Well, that goes without saying. I'm gonna say it anyway. 60 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:56,570 Hey, look at what you're wearing again, Pam. 61 00:03:57,279 --> 00:03:59,865 Have you ever seen a magician's assistant? Thats_. 62 00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:03,285 This is a new cardigan. Kind of blech. 63 00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,871 Maybe you could tie it around your waist 64 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:07,515 or lose the shirt underneath or something. 65 00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:09,666 No? All right. No. 66 00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:15,380 Hi, Kelly. Screw you. 67 00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:19,593 Excuse me. That is no way to address a superior. 68 00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:21,720 Oh, yeah? Screw you, too. 69 00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:25,640 Whoa. What was that all about? 70 00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:27,601 You forgot her birthday. 71 00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,561 It was yesterday. 72 00:04:33,231 --> 00:04:34,441 Go ahead. Go ahead. 73 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:35,525 You do it. 74 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,110 Okay. I insist. 75 00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:40,405 Basically, after Phyllis blackmailed Angela, 76 00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:41,841 Michael asked them both to step down 77 00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:44,051 from the party planning committee because there was too much drama. 78 00:04:44,075 --> 00:04:46,077 What he said was... Just... easy. 79 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:49,623 There was a problem with having one head of the party planning committee. 80 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:53,668 She becomes too powerful, so he appointed two heads. 81 00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:55,188 Party planning? I am a paper salesman. 82 00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:56,355 This is literally the stupidest thing 83 00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,219 I've ever done in my life. This is humiliating. 84 00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:00,926 That's on my side. 85 00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:04,179 So this is fun. 86 00:05:04,554 --> 00:05:07,098 My birthday was yesterday, and everybody forgot. 87 00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:10,101 I got really dressed up and excited and no one said a word. 88 00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:11,978 There wasn't even a party. 89 00:05:12,062 --> 00:05:15,732 I think sometimes people are really mean to the hot, popular girl. 90 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:17,234 Can I turn on the radio? 91 00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:19,861 No, I need silence or Sam kinison to prepare. 92 00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:22,673 But then you fall asleep and there's nothing for me to do. 93 00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:24,950 Then listen to your iPod, Pam. That's dangerous. 94 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:27,953 Well, then... hey, you know what? Let's just talk. 95 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:30,330 That's okay. I can... I'm fine. 96 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,582 I'll just play a song in my head. 97 00:05:36,878 --> 00:05:38,922 You nervous about seeing Karen again? 98 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,258 Since she was the other woman? 99 00:05:41,925 --> 00:05:43,677 Actually, you were the other woman, so... 100 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:46,096 No, that was a long time ago. 101 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:48,181 Is that why you're wearing makeup today? 102 00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:51,393 No, I'm not even wearing that much. 103 00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:54,104 I hate the idea that someone out there hates me. 104 00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:57,482 I even hate thinking that al-qaeda hates me. 105 00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:59,734 I think if they got to know me, 106 00:05:59,818 --> 00:06:01,444 they wouldn't hate me. 107 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:04,781 But Karen knows me and she still hates me, so... 108 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,867 Oh, this is a nice office. 109 00:06:06,950 --> 00:06:10,787 You don't have to lie. Through here. 110 00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:13,540 Andy: Um, Phyllis? 111 00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:16,626 Who's that? 112 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,795 She's out of your league, Andy. 113 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:23,008 For your information, I've been with lots of beautiful women. 114 00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:24,801 Sexually? 115 00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:27,304 This conversation is over. 116 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,055 I am single now. 117 00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:34,185 What we have here is the ultimate smackdown between the nard-dog 118 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:38,523 and crippling despair, loneliness and depression. 119 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,652 I intend to win. 120 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,155 We just wanted to say we are very sorry. 121 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,424 Screw you guys. You're dead to me. 122 00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:47,949 If you say screw you one more time... 123 00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:50,052 Yeah, screw you, beet farmer, I didn't forget your birthday. 124 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,745 I would never do that! Hey! Hey! 125 00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:52,913 Guys, guys, guys. 126 00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:55,415 We just want to make it up to you. What can we do? 127 00:06:56,166 --> 00:07:00,045 I guess my only wish would be that nothing so terrible would ever happen 128 00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:01,254 to anyone else ever again. 129 00:07:01,338 --> 00:07:03,465 Okay. Oh, god 130 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:06,235 in a way, it's good that it happened to me because at least I can bear it. 131 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,595 What kind of cake do you want, imbecile? 132 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:09,679 Ice cream. 133 00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:15,977 Okay, point at the dunder Mifflin. 134 00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:27,530 Hello, Rolando, how are you? Hi. 135 00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:30,492 Rolando, I'd like you to meet Pam. 136 00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:32,118 She is our receptionist. 137 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,453 You know what? Maybe 138 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,164 you guys could go out on a little friend date sometime. 139 00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:40,210 You're late. Everyone's waiting in the conference room. 140 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,295 Karen will be right here to take you over. Okay. 141 00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:45,548 Don't be nervous. Just picture her naked. 142 00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:46,674 Stop it. 143 00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:47,902 That's what I do. Steal my trick. 144 00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:49,427 Please cut it out. Karen: Hey 145 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:51,554 hi, guys. 146 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,682 Oh, my god. 147 00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:56,893 Is that Jim's? 148 00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,019 Pam: Michael! What? 149 00:07:58,103 --> 00:07:59,145 Of course not. Okay. 150 00:07:59,354 --> 00:08:02,399 Wow. Oh, man. My head just exploded. 151 00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:06,486 Whoo! Thank god for everybody, right? 152 00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:11,741 Wow, you're huge! That's incredible. 153 00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:15,370 I... god, sorry, sorry. My head is... I'm just... 154 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:19,124 I'm trying to figure out the last time that you and Jim had sex, and... 155 00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:21,769 Let's just get this over with, shall we? Michael: Okay. Mmm-hmm. 156 00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:23,420 Ten? Ten months? 157 00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:32,595 Are you kidding? 158 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,222 Well, I'm not done yet. 159 00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:37,684 Dwight, this fits in the palm of my hand. 160 00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:39,728 You haven't blown them up enough. 161 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:42,522 Why have you chosen brown and gray balloons? 162 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:44,065 They match the carpet. 163 00:08:44,149 --> 00:08:45,567 What is that? 164 00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:47,027 "It is your birthday," penod. 165 00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:48,319 It's a statement of fact. 166 00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:50,030 Noteven an exclamation point? 167 00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:51,406 This is more professional. 168 00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,491 It's not like she discovered a cure for cancer. 169 00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:56,077 I can't believe how bad this looks. 170 00:08:57,078 --> 00:08:58,705 Are you trying to hurt my feelings? 171 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,148 Because, if so, you are succeeding. 172 00:09:00,999 --> 00:09:04,127 Fortunately, my feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man's. 173 00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:05,252 Okay, good then. 174 00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,731 Have you collected the money from everyone? 175 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:08,548 I am working on it. How much do you have? 176 00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:13,928 That's how much you and I contributed! Damn it, Jim! 177 00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:15,346 I said I was working on it. 178 00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:20,185 Trying to see what cds she's got. 179 00:09:21,102 --> 00:09:23,688 It's good to know the deets about the girl you're wooing. 180 00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,732 Uh... ah-ha! 181 00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:28,151 Feist! Yes! 182 00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,247 Michael: No! 183 00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:44,292 Oh, my god. 184 00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:49,839 Oh, no. That is so awful. That is the worst news. 185 00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,592 I have to go. I have to do a presentation. 186 00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:54,385 I'll talk to you... 187 00:09:54,844 --> 00:09:57,472 This is going to be hard for me to speak today, 188 00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:00,433 because I just learned that my father has died. 189 00:10:01,893 --> 00:10:04,020 No, he didn't. He is alive. 190 00:10:04,479 --> 00:10:07,232 And this isn't even a cell phone. This is a calculator, 191 00:10:07,398 --> 00:10:10,693 but you bought it and now you can't return it. 192 00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:13,780 Or can you? No, you can't. 193 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:17,283 Yes, Karen? Do you need to go pump? 194 00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:20,304 Not gonna have to do that until after I have the baby. 195 00:10:20,328 --> 00:10:22,914 No, I am wondering what are you talking about? 196 00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:27,460 I am talking about how you all need to sell an experience. 197 00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:30,797 Like I sold you on the idea that my father had died. 198 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,674 But now we think you're a liar. 199 00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:36,219 Would a liar bring mini mounds bars? 200 00:10:38,429 --> 00:10:39,931 I am a theatrical person. 201 00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:42,326 Growing up I always thought I would become an actor 202 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:47,105 because I have these memorization tricks that I use. 203 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:52,610 For instance, I learned the pledge ofallegiance 204 00:10:52,694 --> 00:10:55,238 by setting it to the tune of old MacDonald. 205 00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:03,705 Lpledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America 206 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:06,708 and to the republic for which it stands 207 00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:09,002 one nation under god 208 00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,838 with a woof-woof here and a woof-woof there 209 00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:14,674 here a woof, there a woof everywhere a woof-woof 210 00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:17,385 you get it. 211 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:20,930 I don't know you. But I need to know you in order to sell to you. 212 00:11:21,556 --> 00:11:24,036 That is why I've asked you to go around and tell me your names. 213 00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:26,019 I have an amazing mnemonic device 214 00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:29,606 by which I have now memorized all of your names. 215 00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:35,987 Shirty, mole, lazy eye, Mexico, baldy, 216 00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:38,114 sugar boobs, black woman. 217 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:41,659 I have taken a unique part of who you are 218 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:45,705 and I have used that to memorize your name. 219 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:49,626 Baldy, your head is bald, it is hairless, 220 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:54,464 it is shiny, it is reflective, like a mirror. 221 00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,382 "," m your name is Mark. 222 00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:59,093 Yes. Got it. It works! 223 00:11:59,177 --> 00:12:01,387 Uh, it's very insulting. 224 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:02,680 But it works. 225 00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,892 I would like you all to give this a shot. What do you say? 226 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:08,603 But we already know each other's names. 227 00:12:08,686 --> 00:12:11,022 Well, then it will be easier for you. 228 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:13,316 But I still think it's worthwhile to give it a try. 229 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,735 Okay, all right, everyone. Meeting's over. 230 00:12:15,818 --> 00:12:16,945 But I still have more. 231 00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:19,322 Can I please see you in my office, please? 232 00:12:20,031 --> 00:12:23,368 She is pregnant. She is knocked up. "," k Karen. 233 00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:24,702 Pam, let's go. 234 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,083 I can't accept these prices, Stanley. 235 00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:31,334 They just cut our budget. 236 00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:33,169 Brought you guys some coffees. 237 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:35,296 Stanley, I know you have adult-onset diabetes, 238 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:38,508 so I put splenda in yours. 239 00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,843 Let's see, how many did I put in there? 240 00:12:41,386 --> 00:12:45,682 One, two, three, four splendas in your coffee, Stanley 241 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:49,560 none in yours, Julia, because I don't know how you take it 242 00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:51,271 but if you'd rather... 243 00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:53,606 Four splenda? Are you crazy? 244 00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:55,108 No, I actually only put in two, 245 00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:57,944 but that's not how the song goes. 246 00:12:58,027 --> 00:12:59,445 Are you out of your damn mind? 247 00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:01,739 Are you out of your damn mind? 248 00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:04,701 You bring an angel like that into this office 249 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:07,161 and you don't even set me up with her. 250 00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:10,206 We're not friends. I didn't think about it. 251 00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:13,543 We are friends. Stanley, we're friends. 252 00:13:14,252 --> 00:13:15,878 And you let me down. 253 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,549 You really like her, huh? 254 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:22,885 Yeah, I really like her with all my heart. 255 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:28,558 Give me two clients for her. 256 00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:32,395 I grab this, and I turn it on and I say, 257 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,982 "prepare yourself for the utica chain store massacre." 258 00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:38,651 No, that is incredibly dangerous. 259 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,320 No, don't worry, the chain is off. 260 00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:41,487 No, it's not. 261 00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:44,198 You know, I think I'm just going to distill all of this 262 00:13:44,282 --> 00:13:46,159 and send it in an e-mail to my team. 263 00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:49,579 E-mail's not scary. This is an opportunity. Don't blow it. 264 00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:51,414 So, when are you due? 265 00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:53,499 Uh, in about a month. 266 00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:56,544 Wow, that is wonderful. Congratulations. 267 00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:59,422 Thank you. It just all happened so fast. 268 00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:01,674 It's really amazing. Congraunafions, Karen. Thanks. 269 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:05,428 So is there a guy or a person 270 00:14:06,304 --> 00:14:11,267 or a sperm machine that did this to you or... 271 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:14,312 Yes, Michael. My husband impregnated me. 272 00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:15,521 Great. 273 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,440 His name is Dan. 274 00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:21,235 This is us. We're so dorky. That's cute. 275 00:14:21,319 --> 00:14:22,695 Yes, thank you. 276 00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:26,366 He's a dermatologist. We met at a bar. Can you believe that? 277 00:14:27,617 --> 00:14:29,160 What is happening there? 278 00:14:29,243 --> 00:14:31,746 Oh, yeah, don't even... that's really dorky. 279 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:33,164 It's really sweet. 280 00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:34,582 No, it's really dorky. 281 00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:37,001 You were right the first time. 282 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:39,796 So how are things in Scranton? How's Jim? 283 00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:42,298 They're good. Jim's good. 284 00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,635 We're engaged. 285 00:14:48,137 --> 00:14:50,390 That's so great. That's great. 286 00:14:50,473 --> 00:14:51,933 Thank you. 287 00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:53,285 Oh, my god. I'm so happy for you. 288 00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,477 Oh, wow. Thank you. 289 00:14:55,603 --> 00:14:59,232 Old hatreds dissolve into new friendships. 290 00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:01,984 This is really a wonderful moment. 291 00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:08,908 I have to take care of a couple of things, 292 00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:11,244 so Andy will be taking over things here. 293 00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:14,163 You are in good hands and give my best to your mother. 294 00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:19,877 So, Julia, um, let's see. 295 00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:25,925 With regards to billing, should we send bills 296 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:28,594 to you or to your boyfriend's house, or... 297 00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:30,763 No, it can go straight to our business address. 298 00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:33,850 Oh, okay. All right. That makes sense. 299 00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:36,853 How does your boyfriend deal with your phenomenal success? 300 00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:40,398 Is he just, like, totally threatened by you, or... 301 00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:43,401 Actually, I don't have a boyfriend. 302 00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:48,156 Really? Is that... Wow, that's so weird. 303 00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:50,867 Guys, stop everything. 304 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,578 I'm about to ask out this girl and I'm completely panicking. 305 00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:55,079 Oh, my desk is over... 306 00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:57,331 This gal, she's really into you? 307 00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:59,125 Yeah. Yeah, I mean, 308 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:01,085 I've seen her like three times today 309 00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:03,129 and we love all the same music 310 00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:05,923 and whenever I walk into a room she totally looks up. 311 00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:10,052 All right, say no more. This is how I got squeaky fromme. 312 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:14,515 No small talk. Just show her who's the boss. 313 00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:16,100 Just go right in and kiss her. 314 00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:17,852 Okay, it sounds risky. 315 00:16:17,935 --> 00:16:20,480 Have I ever steered you wrong, Jim? 316 00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:22,440 Wait, what? 317 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:25,151 I would give that lecture a solid b-plus. 318 00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:29,030 Although, for the record, Karen, wow, kind of mean. 319 00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:30,239 I like her. 320 00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:33,618 Really? No, honestly. Tell me what you really think. 321 00:16:34,035 --> 00:16:36,913 I'm serious. I'm really glad I came. 322 00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:40,583 Because, um... 323 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:46,964 Becauselilnever wonder ever again if I did something wrong, 324 00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:50,218 and now I have closure. 325 00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:51,928 She's happy, 326 00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:54,430 and, I don't know, it feels good. 327 00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,019 Thanks for walking me out. 328 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:03,022 Oh, my pleasure. Yeah, there's all kinds of weirdoes out here, so... 329 00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:04,732 You must be freezing. 330 00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:07,276 I am about to die. 331 00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:09,862 Will you wait here while I go get my jacket? 332 00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:11,864 No, it's okay. This is my car. 333 00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:13,491 Okay. Okay. 334 00:17:13,616 --> 00:17:15,701 Well, listen, 335 00:17:15,785 --> 00:17:19,539 you're a new client and as one of my new clients 336 00:17:19,914 --> 00:17:22,041 you will always be taken care of 337 00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:25,044 and that is the nard-dog guarantee. 338 00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:27,004 What's a nard-dog? 339 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,881 This is the nard-dog. 340 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:31,717 Whoa! What the hell? 341 00:17:33,844 --> 00:17:36,138 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 342 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,308 I thought we had this energy 343 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,395 and I'm a mess and I just had my heart broken 344 00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:44,981 and you came in today and you're so pretty. 345 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:46,291 You're, like, incredibly pretty. 346 00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:49,277 I just got out of a relationship, too. It's really hard. 347 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,612 Yeah, right? Wow. 348 00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:53,739 Do you want to talk about it? 349 00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:55,543 Go to a mall or something, just walk around? 350 00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:56,742 No, I don't think so. 351 00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:59,745 Sure, yeah, you're right. It's too soon. 352 00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:02,540 Definitely too soon for me, 353 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:05,042 so I'm glad we got that out of the way. 354 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:07,396 I'm going to be in touch with you in three months. 355 00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:09,589 I'm going to call you about that order. 356 00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:11,674 And maybe about that mail walk. 357 00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:12,967 Okay. 358 00:18:13,843 --> 00:18:14,844 Take care, Julia. 359 00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,012 Thank you. 360 00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,728 Sorry I tried to kiss... 361 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,858 We lost the account. 362 00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:35,698 Damn it! 363 00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:39,535 Dwight schrute. Jim: How old is Kelly? 364 00:18:39,744 --> 00:18:40,745 Who is this? 365 00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,330 It's mose. Who do you think it is? 366 00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:44,915 Mose doesn't know how to use a phone, so joke's on you. 367 00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:47,352 Look, I'm at the supermarket and they only have numbered candles. 368 00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:48,461 How old is she? 369 00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:50,755 Twenty-four. Thirty-seven. 370 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:53,191 Do you think I'm calling you for your best approximation? 371 00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:54,216 I'll call you back. 372 00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:06,020 I have here Kelly kapoor's personal and confidential file. 373 00:19:06,187 --> 00:19:07,396 Allow me to share. 374 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:12,526 "Kelly kapoor spent April 1995 to December 1996 375 00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:14,862 "at berks county youth center." 376 00:19:15,738 --> 00:19:16,739 Juvie. 377 00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:22,870 "According to past employers, it in no way affects herjob..." Blah, blah, blah. 378 00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:26,415 Are you asleep? 379 00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,920 Just thinking about what you said. 380 00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:34,507 About Karen, about closure. 381 00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:39,595 You remember Holly? She used to work for hr. 382 00:19:41,389 --> 00:19:42,431 No, remind me. 383 00:19:42,765 --> 00:19:44,225 Blonde hair, 384 00:19:44,975 --> 00:19:46,769 nice boobs. 385 00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:48,521 Not too big, not too small. 386 00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:52,024 Perfect boobs. Of course I remember Holly. 387 00:19:52,566 --> 00:19:54,151 She was the love of my life. 388 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:59,699 What you and Jim have times a hundred. Just... she... 389 00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:03,786 She just left and I didn't... 390 00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:05,371 I never got closure. 391 00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:07,456 You know? I never got closure with her. 392 00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:10,751 I haven't talked to her since. I haven't seen her since. 393 00:20:10,835 --> 00:20:14,338 And I feel like I need to go to nashua and get closure. 394 00:20:14,422 --> 00:20:15,923 Ifeelhke ineedthat 395 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,221 okay. Let's go. 396 00:20:23,681 --> 00:20:26,976 Oh, just blow off the lecture at Rochester? 397 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:31,647 Yeah. Screw them, let's do this. 398 00:20:38,195 --> 00:20:39,363 Okay. 399 00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:46,287 I am collecting $3 from everybody for Kelly's party. 400 00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:47,580 I'd like to contribute. 401 00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,039 Oh, great. 402 00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:53,419 Here you go.