1
00:00:02,795 --> 00:00:03,921
Yeah? You wanted to see me?

2
00:00:04,005 --> 00:00:07,508
Yes, Oscar, come on in.
Close the door if you would.

3
00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:10,011
Thank you. Thanks so
much for talking to me.

4
00:00:10,094 --> 00:00:11,095
Yeah, sure.

5
00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:13,514
I'm going in
for a procedure today.

6
00:00:13,598 --> 00:00:15,516
Is everything okay? Yeah.

7
00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:17,810
It's routine. I'm just
a little bit scared.

8
00:00:17,894 --> 00:00:20,563
I'm sure everything
will be fine.

9
00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:23,149
What's the procedure,
if you don't mind my asking?

10
00:00:23,232 --> 00:00:24,817
It is a colonoscopy.

11
00:00:25,276 --> 00:00:26,444
Okay.

12
00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:30,489
In your experience,
what should I be expecting

13
00:00:30,573 --> 00:00:34,827
in terms of sensation
or emotions?

14
00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:47,131
Is there anything I can do to
make it more pleasurable for me,

15
00:00:47,215 --> 00:00:48,966
or for Dr. Chaudry?

16
00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:52,053
Oh, my god!

17
00:00:52,136 --> 00:00:54,347
My main concern,
should I have a safe word?

18
00:00:54,472 --> 00:00:55,681
Yeah.

19
00:01:17,453 --> 00:01:18,847
So, Michael, you think
you can give me a rundown

20
00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:20,498
on the buffalo
clients by Monday?

21
00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:22,541
Absolutely. You know what?
I'll do you one better.

22
00:01:22,625 --> 00:01:24,126
Sunday. Sunday night.

23
00:01:24,210 --> 00:01:25,711
Okay. I will get it Monday.

24
00:01:25,795 --> 00:01:27,463
Hold on, big guy.

25
00:01:27,546 --> 00:01:30,108
I'm going to put it in the mail
Sunday night, you'll get it Wednesday.

26
00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:32,009
Okay. Jim, you want to
hit the conference room?

27
00:01:32,093 --> 00:01:33,094
Sure.

28
00:01:33,177 --> 00:01:34,178
Hey, good luck.

29
00:01:34,387 --> 00:01:36,597
Oh, right, this thing.
I remember now.

30
00:01:36,681 --> 00:01:37,824
What's this about?

31
00:01:37,848 --> 00:01:39,488
This is just me and
David, if that's okay.

32
00:01:39,517 --> 00:01:41,119
It's okay with me. He's
going to want me in there.

33
00:01:41,143 --> 00:01:43,521
No. It's okay,
Michael. We got it.

34
00:01:43,688 --> 00:01:45,106
Really? Yeah.

35
00:01:45,189 --> 00:01:47,358
All right. Do you mind
if I sit this out?

36
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:51,279
I have so much work to do, I feel
like I'm going to blow my brains out.

37
00:01:52,488 --> 00:01:54,115
Okay. You got it.

38
00:02:00,496 --> 00:02:03,874
Am I worried that Jim and David
are having a meeting without me?

39
00:02:03,958 --> 00:02:07,670
No. Because we are
the three amigos.

40
00:02:08,421 --> 00:02:09,588
And once in a while,

41
00:02:09,672 --> 00:02:13,092
one of the amigos will
go off to the bathroom,

42
00:02:13,175 --> 00:02:16,012
while the other two
have a secret meeting.

43
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:24,020
Hey, let me escort
you to your desk.

44
00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:27,523
Okay. It's just three or
four steps, but thank you.

45
00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:29,817
Thank you. You and
Jim are close, huh?

46
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:33,070
Yeah. I think the pregnancy
really brought us together.

47
00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:36,073
Hey, what do you think he
and David are talking about?

48
00:02:36,157 --> 00:02:37,283
What do you...

49
00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:38,659
Um, I don't know.

50
00:02:38,743 --> 00:02:40,995
Michael: Well, you said
good luck to Jim as he walked in.

51
00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:44,749
Did I? Doesn't sound like
me. Not very superstitious.

52
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:52,548
If you're lying to
me right now, Pam,

53
00:02:52,631 --> 00:02:54,675
your baby is gonna
come out a liar.

54
00:02:56,469 --> 00:03:00,014
That's how it works. They inherit
things through the breast milk.

55
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,933
Please don't talk
about my breast milk.

56
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:05,394
I just don't want
you to lie to me.

57
00:03:05,728 --> 00:03:08,647
I don't want you to ever lie
to me. Have I ever lied to you?

58
00:03:08,731 --> 00:03:09,731
Yeah.

59
00:03:09,774 --> 00:03:11,359
I just don't want you to.

60
00:03:11,442 --> 00:03:13,194
Darryl: I was rushing
to fill an order.

61
00:03:13,277 --> 00:03:16,697
I put the ladder up to grab a box
of three hole from the top shelf,

62
00:03:16,781 --> 00:03:19,367
next thing I know, I'm on the
ground, ladder's on top of me.

63
00:03:19,450 --> 00:03:20,761
And that's how you
broke your ankle?

64
00:03:20,785 --> 00:03:21,911
Yes.

65
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:23,954
Hmm. Interesting.

66
00:03:24,038 --> 00:03:28,084
How did the ladder end up
on top of you if you fell off of it?

67
00:03:28,167 --> 00:03:30,461
This doesn't concern you, man.
You need to walk away.

68
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,797
Oh, really? I'm sorry. I
thought this was a free country.

69
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,965
I didn't know we were
in communist Sweden.

70
00:03:35,049 --> 00:03:36,151
If we were living in Sweden,

71
00:03:36,175 --> 00:03:37,235
I wouldn't have
to worry about this

72
00:03:37,259 --> 00:03:39,178
because we'd have
universal healthcare.

73
00:03:39,929 --> 00:03:40,930
That's not... okay.

74
00:03:41,013 --> 00:03:42,306
Be quiet. I'm talking about...

75
00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:43,641
Hmm...

76
00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,184
I will send this
off to corporate.

77
00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:47,061
Make sure you hold on
to your medical bills.

78
00:03:47,144 --> 00:03:48,312
Feelbefier

79
00:03:48,396 --> 00:03:50,648
thanks, t-man. Later.

80
00:03:52,650 --> 00:03:55,236
Solong, danyl feelbefier

81
00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:56,904
he's lying.

82
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,239
He has a doctor's note.

83
00:03:58,364 --> 00:04:02,410
From who? Dr. J? You
really need to investigate this.

84
00:04:02,493 --> 00:04:04,412
People don't just
fall off of ladders.

85
00:04:04,495 --> 00:04:05,871
Guy on my street
fell off a ladder

86
00:04:05,955 --> 00:04:07,540
painting his house.
It was on the news.

87
00:04:07,623 --> 00:04:10,418
Since when have you known
Darryl to rush to do anything

88
00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,920
other than to come up here
for birthday cake?

89
00:04:13,003 --> 00:04:15,172
"Y'all having birthday cake?"

90
00:04:15,297 --> 00:04:16,650
That's not a very
good Darryl. Please!

91
00:04:16,674 --> 00:04:20,553
And how many foremen
do you know that pull boxes?

92
00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:23,639
It just doesn't add up.

93
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:29,311
Toby: Well, we did a little
investigation, and Dwight had a good point.

94
00:04:29,395 --> 00:04:33,149
The ladder didn't reach the top
shelf. I don't know if! Believe it,

95
00:04:33,232 --> 00:04:36,193
but I am a fan of the
hardboiled detective novel.

96
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:38,612
"I'll punch you into mush, see?"

97
00:04:39,572 --> 00:04:43,492
Uh-huh. Well, if he doesn't like it,
you can tell that s.O.B that he is fired.

98
00:04:43,576 --> 00:04:47,872
Sorry, I'm going into a meeting
right now. I will. I love you, too. Bye.

99
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:48,956
Who was that?

100
00:04:49,039 --> 00:04:50,791
Sorry about that. What'd I miss?

101
00:04:50,875 --> 00:04:53,353
Michael, we would like to continue
the rest of this meeting in private,

102
00:04:53,377 --> 00:04:54,396
please, if you don't mind.

103
00:04:54,420 --> 00:04:55,713
I do not mind.

104
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,632
Yes, I do. No, I don't.
Yes, I do. No, I don't mind.

105
00:04:58,716 --> 00:05:01,093
Catch you guys on the
flippity-flop. Oh, this...

106
00:05:01,177 --> 00:05:02,928
Call waiting. Yeah?

107
00:05:03,012 --> 00:05:05,212
Uh-huh. Well, you tell the
mayor he just lost six votes.

108
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:09,143
They've been in there a while.

109
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:11,061
Yeah. Cawtbegood

110
00:05:12,855 --> 00:05:14,231
think they're talking about me?

111
00:05:14,857 --> 00:05:17,318
No, I think they're
talking about me.

112
00:05:17,401 --> 00:05:20,696
Yeah. That makes way more
sense. Okay. Thanks, boss.

113
00:05:21,530 --> 00:05:23,550
Michael: What is Jim telling
him? That I can't handle this job?

114
00:05:23,574 --> 00:05:25,701
That's bull crap.
That is bull crap.

115
00:05:26,702 --> 00:05:29,497
Although it has been
chaotic lately.

116
00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:31,665
Corporate shut down
the buffalo branch,

117
00:05:31,749 --> 00:05:35,002
which left us to absorb
all of their clients.

118
00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:39,006
I will tell you, there has
been work every day.

119
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,217
Had to come in on a Saturday

120
00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:45,387
to retrieve... I left
my cell phone here.

121
00:05:46,931 --> 00:05:48,516
Hey, Kelly.

122
00:05:48,599 --> 00:05:50,935
So jealous of your boobs.

123
00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:52,978
Thank you.

124
00:05:53,062 --> 00:05:55,397
Um, listen, I just
wanted to confirm

125
00:05:55,481 --> 00:05:57,566
that you're not
coming to the wedding,

126
00:05:57,650 --> 00:06:01,070
which is totally understandable,
and more than fine.

127
00:06:01,153 --> 00:06:02,321
Is Ryan going?

128
00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:04,323
I don't know,
he hasn't rsvped yet.

129
00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:06,825
We invited everyone in
the office to our wedding,

130
00:06:06,909 --> 00:06:08,452
even though we
realized most people

131
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:11,789
wouldn't be able to make
the drive to Niagara Falls.

132
00:06:12,164 --> 00:06:15,334
Which is why
we're having it in Niagara Falls.

133
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:17,920
Then Michael told everyone

134
00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:21,465
they could have Friday
and Monday off if they came.

135
00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:25,386
So now, people have to decide if
they want to come to our wedding

136
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:27,471
or have to work.

137
00:06:27,555 --> 00:06:29,640
Here's the deal.
I really want to go.

138
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,517
But I'm not gonna go
if Ryan doesn't go,

139
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,686
because it's kind of
a waste of time.

140
00:06:33,769 --> 00:06:34,895
That came out wrong.

141
00:06:34,979 --> 00:06:36,665
It would be awesome if
you could try to get him to go

142
00:06:36,689 --> 00:06:39,984
because I'd really like
to be there to support Jim.

143
00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:46,490
What can I do for you, hoss?

144
00:06:46,991 --> 00:06:48,242
How are your sales doing?

145
00:06:48,325 --> 00:06:50,202
How are my sales doing?

146
00:06:50,828 --> 00:06:52,037
Busted.

147
00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:55,624
You know, my numbers
are down a little bit.

148
00:06:55,708 --> 00:06:57,876
And it's 'cause of the economy.

149
00:06:59,003 --> 00:07:01,797
You're not buying it.
You're good.

150
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,882
Okay, the truth is

151
00:07:03,966 --> 00:07:06,844
I have been having trouble
focusing lately. I'm in this weird,

152
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:11,765
flirty, nebulous thing
with this cousin of mine.

153
00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:14,310
And it's a total mind f'er.

154
00:07:14,393 --> 00:07:16,103
Again with the cousin.

155
00:07:16,186 --> 00:07:17,813
Oh, I'm sorry, Phyllis.

156
00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:19,732
You explain this email. Okay?

157
00:07:19,815 --> 00:07:24,194
"Hey, Andy, let's go visit grandma
and then get drunk together. Ha, ha."

158
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:27,740
Shh. I'm just trying to figure out
what's going on in that room, okay?

159
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:29,617
Michael: Wallace had to show up

160
00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:33,537
on the one four-month period
that I'm completely ovennhelmed.

161
00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:38,667
You know when they say,
"it's so crazy it just might work?"

162
00:07:39,251 --> 00:07:42,921
Well, I don't believe that. I
say go for the airtight plan.

163
00:07:43,005 --> 00:07:44,798
And that is why I am having Andy

164
00:07:44,882 --> 00:07:46,425
wheel me into
the conference room

165
00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:48,427
inside a makeshift cheese cart.

166
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:52,890
It is just elegant.

167
00:07:56,268 --> 00:07:57,645
Michael: Be my eyes. You got it.

168
00:07:57,728 --> 00:07:59,563
What have we here? Oh!

169
00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:00,648
Stanley: Hello.

170
00:08:00,731 --> 00:08:02,042
Just backing up
and turning around.

171
00:08:02,066 --> 00:08:03,126
Hey, we're gonna do this...

172
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:05,235
It's not for you.

173
00:08:08,864 --> 00:08:12,326
I took the Liberty of preparing
for you a cheese platter,

174
00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:16,497
which I will place here on the
eastern wall of the conference room.

175
00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:17,665
Cheese platter?

176
00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:22,252
From the Wisconsin region,
a nice, firm cheddar.

177
00:08:23,087 --> 00:08:26,924
Also from the great state of
Wisconsin, an aged parmesan.

178
00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:30,177
Here you will find
a cheddar-style spread,

179
00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:34,348
which has reacted nicely
with the air to form a light rind,

180
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:37,017
which I think you'll find both
challenging and delicious.

181
00:08:37,101 --> 00:08:39,019
At that point, I would
recommend you take

182
00:08:39,103 --> 00:08:42,147
a quick trip south of the border
to the great state of Illinois,

183
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:45,192
where you will find this
fine blue cheese dressing.

184
00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:46,944
If I may be so bold,

185
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,822
it's a lot of fun
to let the goldfish

186
00:08:49,905 --> 00:08:52,658
take a little swim
in the blue cheese.

187
00:08:55,786 --> 00:08:59,039
All right, well, I should
go. Thanks for this.

188
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:00,892
You've given me
a lot to think about.

189
00:09:00,916 --> 00:09:02,977
Please promise me you won't
do anything until we speak.

190
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,461
No, I won't.

191
00:09:05,629 --> 00:09:07,107
All right. Hey,
thanks for taking the time.

192
00:09:07,131 --> 00:09:09,758
Yeah. Appreciate it.
Thank you, Jim.

193
00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:17,224
Erin, is Michael around?

194
00:09:17,307 --> 00:09:19,393
I think he's around here.

195
00:09:20,769 --> 00:09:22,020
Is that...

196
00:09:22,104 --> 00:09:23,230
Hey, hey, hey.

197
00:09:23,313 --> 00:09:25,273
You must have walked right
past me. How you doing?

198
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:26,793
Yeah. Could we talk in
your office for a sec?

199
00:09:26,817 --> 00:09:28,736
Yes, definitely.

200
00:09:28,819 --> 00:09:30,028
Okay.

201
00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:42,291
Toby: It sounds like a emd p40.

202
00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:44,835
Nah. That's a ge.

203
00:09:45,461 --> 00:09:46,962
The p40 is much higher-pitched.

204
00:09:47,045 --> 00:09:48,464
You're into trains?

205
00:09:48,547 --> 00:09:50,132
Have been my whole life. Wow!

206
00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:52,760
I'm rebuilding a
turn-of-the-century steam engine

207
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:54,386
in my slaughterhouse.

208
00:09:54,470 --> 00:09:56,388
That's so cool. Yeah.

209
00:09:56,472 --> 00:09:58,098
Wow! I'd love to
take a look at that.

210
00:09:58,182 --> 00:09:59,826
Yeah. It's just a
run-of-the-mill slaughterhouse,

211
00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:00,850
but sure, anytime.

212
00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:03,228
Well, you know,
because of the trains.

213
00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:05,147
Wait, someone's coming.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

214
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,608
It's Darryl! Get down!
He's not using crutches!

215
00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,276
Get the camera. Start taping.

216
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:10,402
Drive!

217
00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:12,321
Worker's comp, my ass!

218
00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:14,031
I can't believe this.

219
00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:15,282
Hey, you ass!

220
00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:16,366
Toby!

221
00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:19,203
Toby: You gonna eat all
that dog food yourself?

222
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:22,414
No, no!

223
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:24,917
Oh, man! You okay?

224
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,043
Just drive.

225
00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:32,633
Hey. Hey, Ryan.

226
00:10:32,716 --> 00:10:35,636
So, I just wanted to confirm that
you're not coming to my wedding.

227
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:37,805
Yeah, I might stop by.

228
00:10:37,888 --> 00:10:39,890
It costs about $75 per person.

229
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:43,477
Okay. I once had a glass
of cognac that cost $77, so...

230
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:46,563
Can you just tell me now
if you're coming or not?

231
00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:49,817
Yes. I'm coming to your wedding.

232
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:51,819
Okay. Ryan Howard, yes.

233
00:10:51,902 --> 00:10:53,487
Probably yes.

234
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,239
Kelly kapoor, yes.

235
00:10:55,739 --> 00:10:58,742
Are you sure you're okay
with these new responsibilities?

236
00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:00,035
Look who you're talking to.

237
00:11:00,118 --> 00:11:03,831
Just trying to figure out the best
way to utilize everyone's talents.

238
00:11:03,914 --> 00:11:05,999
Well, I would say
that my greatest talent

239
00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:09,461
is being the best
man, woman or child

240
00:11:09,545 --> 00:11:11,171
to have ever run
this branch. Ever.

241
00:11:11,255 --> 00:11:12,256
And what about Jim?

242
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:13,841
You think Jim is
someone who is ready

243
00:11:13,924 --> 00:11:16,635
to move into
a management position?

244
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,350
Permission to speak
on the record.

245
00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:24,726
Please do.

246
00:11:24,810 --> 00:11:27,813
Jim is like big bird.

247
00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:32,234
He is tall and yellow
and very nice.

248
00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:34,736
But would I put him
in charge? No.

249
00:11:35,279 --> 00:11:39,700
I don't think so. He... big bird
doesn't make the tough decisions.

250
00:11:40,576 --> 00:11:44,621
If I was going to put someone in
charge, I would put Bert in charge.

251
00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:46,641
Or I would put one of the
real grownups in charge,

252
00:11:46,665 --> 00:11:47,708
like Maria.

253
00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,084
Or Gordon, maybe.

254
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:50,335
I thought you liked Jim.

255
00:11:50,419 --> 00:11:52,671
Very much.
Jim is my best friend.

256
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:55,507
But here's his
performance report.

257
00:11:57,551 --> 00:11:58,927
Right here.

258
00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:01,805
Now, this was written by Toby,

259
00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:05,267
who we all know is
extremely reliable.

260
00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:09,563
"Constant office distraction. Spends
way too much time at reception.

261
00:12:09,646 --> 00:12:12,900
"Antagonizes other salesmen.
Not at all what he thinks he is."

262
00:12:12,983 --> 00:12:16,111
It's not very well written.
But you get the gist.

263
00:12:16,194 --> 00:12:19,573
Is there anybody else you think
could run the day-to-day of the branch?

264
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,783
I could just continue
to run it myself, that's...

265
00:12:21,867 --> 00:12:25,662
Jim had an interesting idea to
help you with this extra workload.

266
00:12:25,746 --> 00:12:27,748
And it involved
you being promoted

267
00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:30,208
to oversee all northeast sales.

268
00:12:30,292 --> 00:12:33,378
And then Jim would be
promoted to your position.

269
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,132
This was Jim's idea?

270
00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:38,216
Mmm-hmm.

271
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:40,677
Wow!

272
00:12:43,221 --> 00:12:49,186
Well, I'd have to talk to my
mother and my guy at h&r block.

273
00:12:52,147 --> 00:12:53,987
Okay. But, well, see,
here's the thing, though.

274
00:12:54,024 --> 00:12:55,567
The plan doesn't work

275
00:12:55,651 --> 00:12:58,320
unless we have someone
to replace you. I was hoping...

276
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:02,658
Plus, we have to worry about
Jim. He has another job offer.

277
00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,952
We may have to replace him.

278
00:13:05,035 --> 00:13:08,830
I didn't tell Michael because
I thought he'd try to help.

279
00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:14,002
Example, he handed out jell-o shots at
the 23rd mile of the steamtown marathon.

280
00:13:17,089 --> 00:13:19,299
Jim, can you walk me down
to my car for a second?

281
00:13:19,383 --> 00:13:20,550
Sure.

282
00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:45,575
I can't help but feel
partially responsible.

283
00:13:54,084 --> 00:13:58,797
Little pick-me-up. Those
are the best. Sugar rush.

284
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,341
When you were in the office
earlier talking to Wallace,

285
00:14:01,425 --> 00:14:03,552
did I come up at all?

286
00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:07,681
Well, we did talk about
how handsome you are.

287
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:09,158
Why don't we head into
your office and talk?

288
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:12,811
Michael: Okay. What
did we... god! We said...

289
00:14:13,603 --> 00:14:16,523
I know there were
certain things we said.

290
00:14:16,982 --> 00:14:18,702
Michael, look.
I'll just be honest with you.

291
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:21,611
Earlier today, I spoke with
Wallace about a promotion.

292
00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:23,297
And I actually think
that talk went really well.

293
00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:24,364
Mmm-hmm.

294
00:14:24,448 --> 00:14:25,768
And then,
after he spoke with you,

295
00:14:25,824 --> 00:14:28,368
for some reason, it felt
like things had changed.

296
00:14:28,452 --> 00:14:30,829
Hmm. That's weird. That's weird.

297
00:14:31,913 --> 00:14:33,540
Kind of weirding me out.

298
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:36,376
Did you know that Lincoln's
secretary was named Kennedy?

299
00:14:36,460 --> 00:14:38,795
Michael, did you say anything?

300
00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:41,798
Tell you what,
when you leave this office,

301
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:44,009
I'm going to call Wallace
and I'm going to tell him

302
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:45,844
that you should
get that promotion.

303
00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:47,012
Really? Yes.

304
00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:48,472
You will? Yes.

305
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:50,057
Wanna do it right now?

306
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:51,141
Yes.

307
00:14:52,309 --> 00:14:54,978
I tried to keep
Michael in the dark.

308
00:14:56,646 --> 00:15:00,734
I should have known that he can
do just as much damage in the dark.

309
00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,235
I need to see your pupils.

310
00:15:02,319 --> 00:15:03,737
I have to see if
they're dilating...

311
00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:05,530
Stanley: Toby! Dwight!

312
00:15:06,490 --> 00:15:07,741
Is that them?

313
00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:08,992
Definitely.

314
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:13,080
You come to my house,
bust up my trash cans,

315
00:15:13,163 --> 00:15:16,041
call my baby sister an ass
And told her to eat dog food?

316
00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:17,793
We thought that she was you.

317
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:20,087
Why would you think
a lady is me?

318
00:15:23,799 --> 00:15:28,303
Are you serious? Because
you look exactly alike.

319
00:15:28,386 --> 00:15:29,655
Am I the only one?
Toby: That's too far...

320
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,515
Are you getting this? I mean...

321
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:32,599
I don't see it.

322
00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:34,434
Here's what I'm gonna do.

323
00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:37,979
I'm calling corporate and I'm filing
a complaint against both of you.

324
00:15:38,063 --> 00:15:39,272
Oh, dahw.

325
00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:40,524
Come on, Gwyneth.

326
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:42,901
Sad.

327
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:45,946
This is David.

328
00:15:46,780 --> 00:15:48,782
Hey, David, this is Michael...

329
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:51,618
Michael Scott here. Yeah.

330
00:15:51,701 --> 00:15:53,954
Just wanted to talk to
you about Jim Halpert.

331
00:15:54,037 --> 00:15:58,083
I understand that he did
not receive that promotion,

332
00:15:58,166 --> 00:16:00,127
and I wanted to see
what I could do

333
00:16:00,210 --> 00:16:02,587
to nudge you in
the right direction.

334
00:16:03,213 --> 00:16:05,799
So, what, you're changing
your mind about Jim?

335
00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:10,470
Absolutely not!
Like I said before,

336
00:16:10,554 --> 00:16:14,057
Jim is fantastic
and he deserves this job.

337
00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:17,310
Michael, it seems like
you're cutting in and out.

338
00:16:17,394 --> 00:16:20,355
This is not what
you said earlier.

339
00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:22,065
What... here's the thing.

340
00:16:23,233 --> 00:16:24,651
Jim is the best
man for this job.

341
00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:26,054
I think you should
give it to him.

342
00:16:26,111 --> 00:16:28,363
Well, it doesn't change what
you showed me in Jim's file.

343
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:29,823
What? Well...

344
00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:33,326
That was an anomaly.

345
00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:39,666
That file had been falsified.
Toby Flenderson is doing drugs.

346
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:42,189
Michael, lreally don't know
what's going on down there, but...

347
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:44,337
Oh, damn it!

348
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,966
I am getting pulled over for
talking on my cell. Damn it!

349
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:56,183
Hey, Darryl, look,
we're here to apologize.

350
00:16:56,266 --> 00:16:57,475
We're cool. Dwight: Wait.

351
00:16:57,559 --> 00:16:59,769
They're using the lift as
their own personal elevator.

352
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,438
Stanley: What?
He broke his ankle

353
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:03,607
climbing over the railing,
then he lied about it

354
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:06,443
because it was a misuse
of company equipment.

355
00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:08,028
Case closed.

356
00:17:08,111 --> 00:17:09,529
Stupidest thing I ever heard.

357
00:17:09,613 --> 00:17:13,450
Really? Then why is there
new wood only on one railing?

358
00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:17,370
Let's just check
the security tapes, Toby.

359
00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:21,249
Well, you know, I don't think
there's any reason to check them,

360
00:17:21,333 --> 00:17:24,544
butlsuppose if we
wanted to be really certain.

361
00:17:24,628 --> 00:17:26,880
All right. Yeah.
Fine, so whatever.

362
00:17:26,963 --> 00:17:27,963
Yes!

363
00:17:28,006 --> 00:17:29,216
Toby: You really did it.

364
00:17:29,299 --> 00:17:33,011
Now, I would like to file an
official complaint to corporate

365
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:36,473
because Darryl lied
on an official form.

366
00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:39,100
And I'm telling them you guys
sexually harassed my sister.

367
00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:42,437
No judge is gonna believe that.

368
00:17:44,898 --> 00:17:46,191
Okay.

369
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:49,194
Look, we could all file
complaints against each other

370
00:17:49,277 --> 00:17:52,030
and just drown in a sea
of papennork, but,

371
00:17:52,113 --> 00:17:55,325
you know, we'll just
move on with our lives.

372
00:17:56,576 --> 00:18:01,456
So, Dwight and Darryl came to an
agreement that they would both file

373
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:03,083
complaints with corporate,

374
00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,794
and now I get to do
all this papennork.

375
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,797
We worked it out.

376
00:18:11,675 --> 00:18:14,803
Hey, hey, Jim. It would make
me feel really good right now

377
00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:18,265
if you would just punch me
in the face, all right? Just do it.

378
00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:19,808
How many times have I asked you

379
00:18:19,891 --> 00:18:21,351
to put me up for
a branch managerjob?

380
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,396
I never recommended you
because I didn't want to lose you.

381
00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:26,106
And I didn't want to lose Pam.

382
00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:27,774
Now I don't want
to lose the baby.

383
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,734
So, instead, you screwed me?

384
00:18:29,818 --> 00:18:31,861
That's what she said. No.

385
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,030
David Wallace is calling.

386
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:35,299
We're kind of in the
middle of something here.

387
00:18:35,323 --> 00:18:36,342
Should I tell him
you'll call back?

388
00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:39,577
Yeah. No. I'll tell him myself.

389
00:18:40,036 --> 00:18:41,538
Let's both.

390
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:46,751
Hello?

391
00:18:46,835 --> 00:18:48,044
David: Hey, Michael. Yes.

392
00:18:48,128 --> 00:18:49,296
You got Jim there with you?

393
00:18:49,379 --> 00:18:50,797
No, it's just us.

394
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:53,758
Actually, can you call Jim in?
I want him on this. Please.

395
00:18:53,842 --> 00:18:56,428
Oh! Well, here he is right now.

396
00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:58,930
Come in.

397
00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:06,479
Hi, David.

398
00:19:06,563 --> 00:19:09,399
Hey, guys. So, I spoke to Alan.

399
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:12,944
We had kind of an unconventional
idea, which I think is pretty cool.

400
00:19:13,028 --> 00:19:15,572
But it only works if
everyone's on board.

401
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:18,325
Well, just as long as it means
Jim becomes a manager.

402
00:19:18,408 --> 00:19:21,661
We were thinking of having two
branch managers in Scranton.

403
00:19:21,745 --> 00:19:24,164
Both of you guys
working as co-managers.

404
00:19:24,247 --> 00:19:25,623
Jim would handle the day-to-day,

405
00:19:25,707 --> 00:19:29,044
and Michael, you would focus
on clients and big picture stuff.

406
00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:30,337
Wow! That sounds pretty cool.

407
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:31,671
I like that!

408
00:19:31,755 --> 00:19:33,506
So, manager and co-manager.

409
00:19:33,590 --> 00:19:35,675
Co-manager and co-manager.

410
00:19:35,759 --> 00:19:37,260
See, there are a lot
of moving pieces

411
00:19:37,344 --> 00:19:39,679
and this is the only way
I can sell it upstairs.

412
00:19:39,763 --> 00:19:41,574
Well, that might be a
little confusing for people

413
00:19:41,598 --> 00:19:43,767
because they know me as manager.

414
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:47,771
All right, hey, Michael, can
you pick up for one second?

415
00:19:48,438 --> 00:19:51,191
Okay, look, I'm not going
to force you into anything.

416
00:19:51,274 --> 00:19:53,443
If you're willing
to lose Jim, fine.

417
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,613
You just say so. We'll
find another solution. Okay?

418
00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,616
Is that what you want to do?

419
00:20:06,164 --> 00:20:07,850
Okay, people, listen up!
Michael: Okay, everybody.

420
00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:09,834
Both: I have an
announcement to make.

421
00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:11,199
Fraud was committed in... whoa!

422
00:20:11,252 --> 00:20:12,271
Do you have an announcement?

423
00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:13,671
I was making it.

424
00:20:13,755 --> 00:20:16,549
Everybody, David
Wallace and I have talked,

425
00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:20,637
and we have decided to promote
Jim to the position of co-manager.

426
00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:22,472
Co-manager of what?

427
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,391
Of your butt!

428
00:20:25,058 --> 00:20:28,978
And your butt, and your butt, and
your butt. All of Scranton branch butts.

429
00:20:29,062 --> 00:20:30,563
What's happening
to you, Michael?

430
00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:31,773
What's happening to me?

431
00:20:31,856 --> 00:20:34,275
I am also being
promoted to co-manager.

432
00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:36,736
We will be co-managers together.

433
00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:40,824
Jim Halpert, welcome.

434
00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:42,283
Thank you.

435
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:53,837
Niagara Falls in October?
Hells yeah!

436
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:57,340
Do you think that you could
send in your rsvp card?

437
00:20:57,424 --> 00:20:58,842
No. I'll just
tell you now. Easier.

438
00:20:58,925 --> 00:21:01,261
Well, you have to
choose a food option,

439
00:21:01,344 --> 00:21:03,805
and there's information in there
about directions and lodging.

440
00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:06,766
I'll just have whatever's
fanciest, unless there's ribs,

441
00:21:06,850 --> 00:21:09,495
and I'll just get all the other
information the day of. I'll text you.

442
00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:12,522
You are going to text me
the morning of my wedding

443
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:14,125
to ask for directions...
Mmm-hmm. Right.

444
00:21:14,149 --> 00:21:16,443
And you will eat
whatever is fanciest?

445
00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:17,861
Unless there's ribs.

446
00:21:19,195 --> 00:21:20,238
Rude.

447
00:21:20,321 --> 00:21:22,198
Mmm-hmm. So rude, right?

448
00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:25,577
Oh, my gosh. I have been
chasing people down all day.

449
00:21:25,660 --> 00:21:26,660
It's incredible.

450
00:21:26,703 --> 00:21:28,371
Pam, my bag was there.

