1
00:00:01,085 --> 00:00:03,796
What about this one?
It's kind of badass, right?

2
00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:08,426
It just seems kind of crazy in
a way I might need right now.

3
00:00:08,593 --> 00:00:13,264
I don't know.
Oh, that's not yours.

4
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,933
Jim: Stanleyjust
drank oj out of my mug

5
00:00:16,017 --> 00:00:19,604
and didn't seem to realize
that it wasn't his hot coffee.

6
00:00:19,687 --> 00:00:21,981
So, the question
has to be asked,

7
00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:25,234
is there no limit to
what he won't notice?

8
00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:27,945
What's a seven-letter
word for purse?

9
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:30,281
Satchel.

10
00:00:30,448 --> 00:00:32,200
No. Starts with an "h."

11
00:00:32,283 --> 00:00:33,534
Handbag!

12
00:00:35,119 --> 00:00:36,120
Hmm, thank you.

13
00:00:38,623 --> 00:00:39,624
Shh.

14
00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:52,345
All right, everybody.
Take a seat.

15
00:00:52,637 --> 00:00:55,681
As you may have heard, our
branch on the planet Jupiter

16
00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,142
is up 8,000% in sales.

17
00:00:58,476 --> 00:00:59,727
(All cheering)

18
00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:06,359
Hold up. That clock
is slow. It is 5:00.

19
00:01:07,109 --> 00:01:08,694
I will see you all tomorrow.

20
00:01:08,778 --> 00:01:10,154
Bye, Stanley, love you.

21
00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:15,243
So long, Stanley.

22
00:01:15,326 --> 00:01:16,744
Night, everybody.

23
00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,563
So, what kind of
statement are you making

24
00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:45,940
with that costume, Kevin?

25
00:01:46,023 --> 00:01:48,442
Well, the statement
that I am making, Oscar,

26
00:01:48,526 --> 00:01:50,861
is I kind of look
like Michael Moore.

27
00:01:51,028 --> 00:01:52,363
(Telephone ringing)

28
00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:54,073
Dunder Mifflin, this is Erin.

29
00:01:54,198 --> 00:01:56,826
Happy Halloween.
How can I haunt you today?

30
00:01:56,993 --> 00:01:59,353
A lot of people are really
getting into Halloween this year.

31
00:01:59,412 --> 00:02:00,931
(In high pitched voice)
Six seconds, macgruber.

32
00:02:00,955 --> 00:02:02,832
Pam's got a lot of
fun stuff planned...

33
00:02:03,666 --> 00:02:04,977
(In high pitched voice)
Two seconds, macgruber.

34
00:02:05,001 --> 00:02:08,170
Including a costume contest
and bobbing for apples

35
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,630
and a ouija board.

36
00:02:09,714 --> 00:02:12,049
Oh! Boom! Oh! Explosion!

37
00:02:12,216 --> 00:02:13,759
Macgruber!

38
00:02:14,552 --> 00:02:17,179
People are really into the
costume contest this year.

39
00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:20,360
Might have something to do with
the prize. Maybe you've heard of it?

40
00:02:20,391 --> 00:02:23,185
The 2011 Scranton-wilkes-barre
coupon book,

41
00:02:23,269 --> 00:02:26,689
worth over $15,000 in savings.

42
00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:30,234
Stop. Too late.

43
00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:33,863
If I was the real Scranton strangler,
you'd be so strangled by now.

44
00:02:34,030 --> 00:02:36,741
And if you're out there,
strangler, you will getcaught

45
00:02:36,824 --> 00:02:38,367
by me.

46
00:02:38,576 --> 00:02:40,304
Sounds like someone's
really trying to convince us

47
00:02:40,328 --> 00:02:41,829
that he's not
the Scranton strangler.

48
00:02:41,912 --> 00:02:43,706
To my chickens,
I'm the Scranton strangler.

49
00:02:45,291 --> 00:02:47,251
Dwight: Oh-ho.
That's very funny.

50
00:02:48,002 --> 00:02:50,522
Looks like someone decided to
dress up as old Dwight schrute's mom.

51
00:02:50,546 --> 00:02:52,298
What? You're only
one-third as beautiful

52
00:02:52,381 --> 00:02:53,632
and about half her height.

53
00:02:54,133 --> 00:02:56,510
I am supposed to be olive oyl.
And it makes more sense

54
00:02:56,594 --> 00:02:58,679
when I'm standing
next to popeye,

55
00:02:58,763 --> 00:03:01,265
but Jim doesn't
wanna put his costume on.

56
00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:02,725
I am popeye.

57
00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,478
I've never really
been a costume guy.

58
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,406
Even when I was a kid, it just
felt like something I was too old for.

59
00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,861
And then this morning, Pam
hands me this little number.

60
00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:20,618
In case you can't read my,
my, my poker face, (laughs)

61
00:03:20,743 --> 00:03:22,661
We will be reviewing
our sales policies.

62
00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:27,291
I have 10 seconds to explain
them or this whole place blows up.

63
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:28,876
Macgruber!

64
00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:30,878
Lame.

65
00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:33,130
Why don't witches wear panties?

66
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,340
Oh, here we go.

67
00:03:34,632 --> 00:03:36,384
Because they need
to grip the broom.

68
00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:37,635
(Laughing)

69
00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:42,473
Oh! Who likes to water-ski
on lake eerie? No, wait.

70
00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:43,950
Where does Dracula
like to water-ski?

71
00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:45,101
Lake eerie.

72
00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:47,144
When our warehouse workers
make deliveries,

73
00:03:47,228 --> 00:03:50,272
they're gonna be encouraged
to offer clients extra products.

74
00:03:50,481 --> 00:03:52,334
And then they will split
those commissions with sales.

75
00:03:52,358 --> 00:03:54,902
Wait, so drivers are gonna be
able to sell paper on the road?

76
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:55,986
That is correct.

77
00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:58,155
Has anyone started
calling you Gabe-wad yet?

78
00:03:58,489 --> 00:03:59,490
Not here, no.

79
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:00,658
Gabe-wad.

80
00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,160
Gabe: Okay, guys.
Fun is fun, but...

81
00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:06,705
Blackula.

82
00:04:06,789 --> 00:04:07,873
Dracula.

83
00:04:07,957 --> 00:04:10,668
Oh, so, and I almost forgot,

84
00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,253
you'll find this hilarious.

85
00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:16,507
Apparently corporate
is going to have drivers

86
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:19,093
sell paper on their routes now.

87
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:22,054
That's, hke, exacfly sort
of the idea that you had.

88
00:04:22,346 --> 00:04:26,016
Yes, I do remember saying
something like that to you.

89
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:27,685
Yeah.

90
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:29,770
I'm sorry.

91
00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,480
I blew this.

92
00:04:31,689 --> 00:04:33,250
You should have gotten
credit for that, man.

93
00:04:33,274 --> 00:04:34,626
I'm just glad
we're gonna try it out.

94
00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:35,776
Really? We're good?

95
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:36,944
We're cool.

96
00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:38,362
Okay.

97
00:04:38,529 --> 00:04:40,156
Okay. What's that in your shirt?

98
00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:45,411
That's a ream of paper.
I thought you might hit me.

99
00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:49,748
Darryl philbin is the
greatest guy in the world.

100
00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:51,292
And you know what I'd like?

101
00:04:51,375 --> 00:04:55,671
I would like to have all
the racists brought together,

102
00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:58,466
and take Darryl philbin
out to lunch,

103
00:04:58,549 --> 00:05:00,217
just to see what
they're missing.

104
00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:01,736
It's a great stick, right?

105
00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:02,803
Ryan: It's really good.

106
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,450
A classic. I feel like you might
win the whole thing with that.

107
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,558
Thanks. Oscar: Everyone realizes

108
00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:10,811
this coupon book is not
actually worth $15,000, right?

109
00:05:10,895 --> 00:05:13,647
You'd have to spend $200,000
on crap you don't even need

110
00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,649
to get $15,000
worth of benefits.

111
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,128
I'm not the only one who
sees this, right? Ryan: No.

112
00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:19,153
Well, sure. No.

113
00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:21,280
I get that. I get that.

114
00:05:21,530 --> 00:05:22,948
Uh, excuse me, everyone?

115
00:05:23,032 --> 00:05:26,327
I wanna invite you all to the
Halloween party I'm having at my bar.

116
00:05:26,619 --> 00:05:27,870
You own a bar?

117
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,997
Public school, at exit 11.

118
00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:34,293
That's a great name.
You're hilarious.

119
00:05:35,294 --> 00:05:36,295
A plus!

120
00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,756
So, you're all on the list.

121
00:05:38,881 --> 00:05:41,884
Hey, man, can I get a
plus five? It's all guys.

122
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:44,637
Hey, what's the crowd like,
Danny? Our age?

123
00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:45,763
Okay.

124
00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:49,808
I don't think that she
would leave Jim for Danny.

125
00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:51,936
I don't know.
They're both handsome.

126
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:56,148
Pam is gonna choose whoever has
a scent most like that of her father.

127
00:05:56,232 --> 00:05:57,918
Does anyone remember
what her dad smelled like?

128
00:05:57,942 --> 00:05:59,026
I think he...

129
00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,589
Hey, hey, gang, quiet.
Here she comes.

130
00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:05,074
Did you hear about that Danny
guy? Heard he used to date Pam.

131
00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:07,868
So, four years ago, when I
was in stamford, Connecticut,

132
00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:11,580
and dating someone else, Pam
went on two dates with Danny,

133
00:06:11,664 --> 00:06:14,041
which was obviously the
greatest love story ever told,

134
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:16,186
given how much people are
walking on eggshells around us.

135
00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:18,379
We were basically Romeo
and Juliet. That's right.

136
00:06:18,462 --> 00:06:20,398
Except where Juliet
doesn't have that great a time

137
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,508
and Romeo doesn't
call back after two dates.

138
00:06:22,591 --> 00:06:23,634
Yikes.

139
00:06:23,759 --> 00:06:26,428
But I've learned to love again.

140
00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:28,472
He's a cartoon sailor, oh! No.

141
00:06:28,556 --> 00:06:30,808
And he looks so
handsome in his uniform. No.

142
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:32,171
Please! No, I'm not gonna... no.

143
00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:34,687
Tuna! Tuna!

144
00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,439
If you want us to
skip this party...

145
00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:38,606
I don't care.

146
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:41,485
Kevin: I am never gonna
forget what Danny did to Pam.

147
00:06:41,694 --> 00:06:43,320
I forget nothing.

148
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,048
I'm like an elephant
in that way.

149
00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,073
You know what else?

150
00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:49,118
This sucks for Jim, right?

151
00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:50,786
But it also sucks for us

152
00:06:50,869 --> 00:06:53,539
because we don't get invited
to a ton of Halloween parties.

153
00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:56,250
Yeah. And like,
everyone's gonna be there.

154
00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:57,960
Stanley,

155
00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,044
Phyllis,

156
00:06:59,128 --> 00:07:00,296
Angela,

157
00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,672
Darryl...

158
00:07:01,797 --> 00:07:03,841
Creed's a maybe. Creed's going?

159
00:07:06,594 --> 00:07:10,264
Madge from the warehouse
just made her first sale.

160
00:07:10,347 --> 00:07:13,767
Madge! We should have
been doing this a long time ago.

161
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:21,275
Erin? Would you
please do me a solid,

162
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:24,528
and get Darryl philbin
on the speakerphone?

163
00:07:25,029 --> 00:07:26,113
(Phone dialing)

164
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:27,281
(Phone ringing)

165
00:07:28,866 --> 00:07:29,908
Hello?

166
00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:31,619
Hi, Darryl,
come out here, please.

167
00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:33,704
I'm good.

168
00:07:33,996 --> 00:07:35,372
You need to stop being so shy,

169
00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:38,292
come out here and embrace
who you really are, superstar.

170
00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:39,627
This is embarrassing, Michael.

171
00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:40,794
Michael: Yeah, I bet it is.

172
00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:42,796
You're gonna do
your job well here,

173
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,673
you gotta get used
to being embarrassed.

174
00:07:44,757 --> 00:07:46,050
Well, let me put my shoes on.

175
00:07:46,842 --> 00:07:48,052
(Dial tone)

176
00:07:49,595 --> 00:07:51,096
Hit the speakerphone button.

177
00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,849
The speakerphone button.

178
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,559
Same button as you hit before.

179
00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:57,662
Samem automated
voice: Yburcaflcannot“

180
00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:58,687
or sit on it.

181
00:07:58,896 --> 00:08:02,733
This whole delivery slash sales
idea, you know whose that was?

182
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:03,942
That was Darryl philbin's.

183
00:08:04,193 --> 00:08:08,030
He thought of that way before
the corporate fatsuits.

184
00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:10,199
So, what happened?
I got in the way.

185
00:08:10,282 --> 00:08:12,201
I said, "no,"

186
00:08:12,284 --> 00:08:14,370
and it just stopped.

187
00:08:14,453 --> 00:08:17,498
But then, corporate
comes up with this idea.

188
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:21,168
But you know what? They
need to know that it was yours.

189
00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,920
And I don't care
if I take a bullet.

190
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,338
We are going to call them,

191
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:26,621
we are gonna put them on
speakerphone right now, oh. Oh.

192
00:08:26,757 --> 00:08:29,426
And we are going to
straighten this out.

193
00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:32,096
Screw corporate! They
probably stole the idea anyway.

194
00:08:32,262 --> 00:08:33,681
Michael: Mmm-hmm.

195
00:08:33,806 --> 00:08:34,949
Corporate stole nothing. Okay?

196
00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,517
Darryl brought this idea to me.

197
00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:39,103
And then I told them,
giving Darryl full credit. So,

198
00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:41,105
no need to "screw corporate."

199
00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:43,941
Everyone, let's give Darryl a
round of applause as planned.

200
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:50,948
I'm a little peeved
at Darryl right now.

201
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,616
He went to Gabe
behind your back!

202
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:55,285
No, he didn't go behind my
back. He went over my head.

203
00:08:55,369 --> 00:08:57,788
He went over your head
to go behind your back.

204
00:08:58,497 --> 00:09:00,040
What is taking
someone from behind?

205
00:09:00,124 --> 00:09:01,375
No. Shh. Michael, listen.

206
00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:03,978
This cannot stand. You can't have
workers going straight to corporate.

207
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,212
It makes your job superfluous.

208
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,630
It was a good idea, though.

209
00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:10,551
Yeah, here's another good
idea, corporate chain of command.

210
00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:15,013
We need to
strangle Darryl's idea.

211
00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:17,099
Hey hey, Danny

212
00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:20,436
I'm really sorry, but we can't
come to your party tonight.

213
00:09:20,519 --> 00:09:22,747
I was looking forward to
throwing some darts with you guys.

214
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:23,873
You were? Okay, well then...

215
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:27,401
I mean, maybe we could
do it like, next Halloween?

216
00:09:27,609 --> 00:09:28,689
For sure. We're just, like,

217
00:09:28,861 --> 00:09:30,279
totally caught in
the middle here.

218
00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:31,488
What are you talking about?

219
00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,575
Well, Jim and Pam
basically begged us not to go.

220
00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:36,493
Jim and Pam really
don't want you to go?

221
00:09:36,952 --> 00:09:39,997
They're really upset about
the whole Danny situation.

222
00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:41,248
I'll talk to 'em.

223
00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:44,835
Yeah, but do you know what? Don't
tell them that we said anything to you.

224
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:46,712
Okay.

225
00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:48,172
Okay? Or you're dead.

226
00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,256
Okay.

227
00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:50,340
Okay.

228
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:55,262
(Gasps) Kelly! Great costume.

229
00:09:56,221 --> 00:10:00,058
Kelly! You cannot change
costumes in the middle of the day!

230
00:10:00,184 --> 00:10:01,268
Pam, she's out.

231
00:10:01,894 --> 00:10:05,147
If I'm out, I'm gonna sue this
entire company for discrimination.

232
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,775
Guys, you're arguing over
a one-in-sixteen chance,

233
00:10:07,900 --> 00:10:10,402
over a prize worth $40.

234
00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:12,070
Fifteen thousand bucks, Oscar.

235
00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,530
Yeah, shut it, Oscar. Pam?

236
00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:15,282
This is an amazing prize.

237
00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:17,367
I mean, I don't even wanna
give Pam a compliment,

238
00:10:17,451 --> 00:10:20,954
'cause she's so, ugh...
But she did a good job.

239
00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:22,278
I really want that coupon book.

240
00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:24,792
Garbage magnet. Garbage magnet.

241
00:10:24,875 --> 00:10:27,044
God! Magnets are
interesting enough,

242
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:30,172
you don't need to tart
'em up with some design.

243
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:33,425
I can't believe this
doesn't make you mad.

244
00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:34,990
What the hell are
they talking about?

245
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:39,139
Hmm. Kevin and Gabe? Probably
about the extremes of the human physique.

246
00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:40,974
Do you think Kevin
is going over my head?

247
00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:44,645
I don't... oh, my god. Okay.
All right, all right, all right.

248
00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:47,564
You know what?
That's inappropriate, Kevin.

249
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:48,690
I am your boss.

250
00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:51,151
And if you have something
to say, it goes through me,

251
00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:52,569
and then I take it to Gabe.

252
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:54,363
Chain of command.
Do you understand?

253
00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,198
I am so sorry. Oh, you're sorry?

254
00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:58,043
I just thought... what
did you just thought?

255
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,327
Well, Gabe asked me
if there were

256
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:03,080
any really cool lady gaga moves

257
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:04,665
that he could do
for the catwalk.

258
00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:06,917
And so, then I told...

259
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,377
All right.

260
00:11:08,460 --> 00:11:10,587
I told him that there
was this one cool move

261
00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:12,923
where she powers down
like a robot.

262
00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:14,007
Okay.

263
00:11:14,091 --> 00:11:15,884
Okay? But I'm so sorry that...

264
00:11:15,968 --> 00:11:17,237
All right.
I didn't tell you first.

265
00:11:17,261 --> 00:11:19,346
Well, don't let it happen again.

266
00:11:19,429 --> 00:11:22,015
You think that I would
let this happen again?

267
00:11:22,099 --> 00:11:23,767
No way, Jose!

268
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:28,939
(Bleep) You, Gabe.

269
00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:32,818
(Laughing) Can you
imagine? It's just crazy.

270
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:33,944
Jim: That is crazy.

271
00:11:34,236 --> 00:11:36,339
We would never care if Andy
or Kevin went to your party.

272
00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,448
Look, I'm just glad
we can laugh about it,

273
00:11:38,574 --> 00:11:41,034
because I was a little nervous
about coming to work here,

274
00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:42,536
with, you know, our history.

275
00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:45,064
Oh, my gosh. Everyone keeps
blowing that out of proportion.

276
00:11:45,122 --> 00:11:47,165
It's not even a history.
Exactly.

277
00:11:47,291 --> 00:11:49,960
It's not like you guys had
some long relationship, right?

278
00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:51,896
Big painful breakup
I don't know about?

279
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,005
(Laughs) No!

280
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:54,548
Two or three dates. It was two.

281
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:56,300
Was it two?
I thought it was three.

282
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:59,094
No, we had plans for a third,

283
00:11:59,177 --> 00:12:01,680
but then, I don't know, you
never called me back. So...

284
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:03,265
Oh! You can't handle the truth!

285
00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:04,391
(Laughing)

286
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,310
Well, that does not
sound like me.

287
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:08,812
Yeah. It was, though.
That's what happened.

288
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,632
Well, great, I just wanted to
make sure things weren't weird.

289
00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:15,861
Uh-uh.

290
00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:20,991
Okay. This whole
going over my head gate

291
00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:22,534
is making people act weird.

292
00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:23,994
Chain of command is crumbling.

293
00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:26,239
Do you know what just
happened? I just made Kevin cry.

294
00:12:26,580 --> 00:12:29,750
And Gabe looks like lady gaga.
That's not Halloween.

295
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,170
Halloween should be a day
in which we honor monsters

296
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,504
and not be mad at each other.

297
00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:36,340
I'm not mad. Are you mad?

298
00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:38,926
You went over my head,
and then you lied to my face.

299
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:41,428
So, my head and my face
have taken a beating.

300
00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:44,306
Well, I'm sorry if it
seems that way to you.

301
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:45,474
Okay, that might help.

302
00:12:45,557 --> 00:12:47,684
If you said "I'm sorry"
in front of everybody...

303
00:12:47,851 --> 00:12:48,936
Mike... in front of me.

304
00:12:49,019 --> 00:12:52,147
You made a bad call
and I fixed it.

305
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,941
So, I'm not apologizing.

306
00:12:54,066 --> 00:12:55,734
So, that's it?

307
00:12:56,193 --> 00:12:57,527
That's it. Is it?

308
00:12:57,903 --> 00:12:58,987
Yes.

309
00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:03,533
Sookie!

310
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:05,077
(Growling)

311
00:13:06,328 --> 00:13:08,038
Bill Compton from true blood.

312
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:11,333
How many freaking vampires am I
supposed to care about these days?

313
00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:13,628
Well, I guess you could say
I'm still in costume.

314
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:16,380
I'm a rational "consumer."

315
00:13:17,047 --> 00:13:18,340
Oh. Oh, yeah. So, it's...

316
00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:22,594
This stupid coupon booklet.

317
00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:25,343
Have you seen my costume?
I'm a rational "consumer."

318
00:13:25,389 --> 00:13:27,849
Yeah, I heard you say it to
Phyllis. That's a good line.

319
00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:30,477
Okay, everybody.
After you walk the runway,

320
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:33,021
everyone has to vote for
who gets the coupon book.

321
00:13:33,105 --> 00:13:34,481
And you can't vote for yourself.

322
00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:36,984
Pam, can you vote
for other people?

323
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:40,070
Hey, I gotta get in on this.
Hey, it's cool, man.

324
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,240
I work in the warehouse.
I'm cool!

325
00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:45,200
I'm hip and I'm jive!

326
00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:47,619
But I don't care aboutnobody!

327
00:13:47,911 --> 00:13:49,287
Do you know who I am?

328
00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:52,290
Happy Halloween, jerk!

329
00:13:53,375 --> 00:13:54,710
Still don't know who I am?

330
00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,461
I'll give you a hint.

331
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:58,588
I go over other people's heads.

332
00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:00,048
Michael, this is a bad idea.

333
00:14:00,132 --> 00:14:01,341
What's a bad idea?

334
00:14:01,591 --> 00:14:04,428
Dressing up as somebody. I mean,
when has that ever worked for you?

335
00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:05,595
Neveh

336
00:14:06,430 --> 00:14:09,224
okay, you know what, fine.
I'm not Darryl.

337
00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:11,143
And thank god I'm not Darryl.

338
00:14:11,309 --> 00:14:13,437
Could you have for once
just let us enjoy a party,

339
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,272
instead of making it
about all your issues?

340
00:14:17,441 --> 00:14:18,817
(Upbeat music playing)

341
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:20,902
(Cheering and clapping)

342
00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:22,779
(Growling)

343
00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:25,574
(Yells)

344
00:14:25,741 --> 00:14:26,742
That's a warrior!

345
00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:36,793
I present to you
the rational "consumer,"

346
00:14:37,294 --> 00:14:38,295
as it were.

347
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:48,096
Todd: Slow, nice
and slow, honey.

348
00:14:48,180 --> 00:14:49,389
Pam: Angela as a nurse.

349
00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:51,194
Dont_.no, slow it down.
Creed: There it is.

350
00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:52,493
Angela: I don't like your tone.

351
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:55,479
Look, they were sold out of
all the other costumes, okay?

352
00:14:57,314 --> 00:14:59,316
I think we all live
in the real world here.

353
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,903
Let's not pretend to be unaware
of what sells in this office.

354
00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,130
Phyllis: What should we ask?

355
00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,739
Hey, can I play?

356
00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:09,451
Why don't you ask if
Darryl is a bad friend

357
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,827
who backstabs
people in the back?

358
00:15:11,328 --> 00:15:14,208
We have one question to ask the
spirit world and you want us to ask that?

359
00:15:14,831 --> 00:15:15,999
He says no.

360
00:15:16,083 --> 00:15:17,834
Uh, Darryl moved it.
You moved it.

361
00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:20,807
Hey, Dwight, you saw
Darryl move it, right?

362
00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:25,550
Let's just say I saw exactly what
the two of you wanted me to see.

363
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,677
I know how to sit on a fence.

364
00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:30,347
Hell, I can even
sleep on a fence.

365
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:33,683
The trick is to do it face down
with the post in your mouth.

366
00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:36,144
If you had one word you
would use to describe Darryl,

367
00:15:36,228 --> 00:15:37,687
what would that word be?

368
00:15:39,481 --> 00:15:40,524
Erin: A...

369
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,616
H... no!

370
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,077
Uh. E...

371
00:15:53,829 --> 00:15:54,913
An asset.

372
00:15:55,205 --> 00:15:56,373
(Screams)

373
00:15:58,583 --> 00:15:59,584
That's enough.

374
00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:05,753
I don't think it's gonna
work out the way you think.

375
00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,384
I don't think you get it.

376
00:16:10,387 --> 00:16:11,888
Hey. Hey.

377
00:16:11,972 --> 00:16:13,098
This is some party, huh?

378
00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,433
When you work hard,
you play hard around here.

379
00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:16,560
Evenifyou don't work hard.

380
00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:17,769
(Laughs)

381
00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:20,730
Oh, here's something.

382
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:24,776
Why didn't you
ever call Pam back?

383
00:16:25,068 --> 00:16:26,069
Senous?

384
00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:30,073
Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying that
everybody has to fall in love or anything.

385
00:16:30,198 --> 00:16:31,425
I'm just saying,
but... to, you know,

386
00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:32,868
to not even call her back is...

387
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,495
You know what it was? I
think she gave me her number,

388
00:16:35,579 --> 00:16:37,622
but then, her fours
look like eights and...

389
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:38,707
Could be.

390
00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:42,169
But you also called her the second
time, so you had the number right.

391
00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:43,253
Todd: Halpert,

392
00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:45,797
you looking for
someone to bang your wife?

393
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,257
Okay. No.

394
00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:49,759
You want to know?

395
00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:51,178
(Exhales)

396
00:16:51,428 --> 00:16:53,447
I didn't call her back because
she spent the whole date

397
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:54,598
talking about you.

398
00:16:55,265 --> 00:16:57,934
She was obviously
in love with you.

399
00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:01,688
Fifty-seven, fifty-eight...

400
00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:03,398
Wait, wait.
She hasn't moved in a while.

401
00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:04,983
Erin!

402
00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:08,028
Two! I got two!
I ate two whole apples!

403
00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:09,404
(Erin laughs)

404
00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:15,118
I'd remember talking
about Jim. That wasn't it.

405
00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,662
Just tell her the real reason.

406
00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:20,141
Do you honestly wanna know
why I didn't call her back

407
00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,541
on a date over four years ago?

408
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:22,876
Hey, she had a nice time.

409
00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:23,959
It seems rude. Well...

410
00:17:24,002 --> 00:17:25,629
I did. Yeah, and it's
one of those things

411
00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,297
that's just gonna
keep gnawing at me.

412
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:30,634
Like, gnaw, gnaw... "Why? Why
didn't he? I have no idea why."

413
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,428
Okay, honestly,
I didn't call you back

414
00:17:33,511 --> 00:17:35,722
because I just thought
you seemed a little

415
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:36,848
dorky.

416
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,436
Hey, man_. Thank you!

417
00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:44,147
Thank you. I got it.

418
00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:45,774
Now I know.

419
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:49,152
You thought I was a
little dorky. You know?

420
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:56,493
(Gibbers) Okay. Well, excuse me.

421
00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:01,248
In the future, you need to get
Michael's approval on anything

422
00:18:01,331 --> 00:18:03,041
before coming to me. Thank you.

423
00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:05,001
You're gonna miss out
on some good ideas.

424
00:18:05,293 --> 00:18:07,837
Okay, well, obviously if it's
a really, really good idea,

425
00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:09,047
then my door is open.

426
00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:11,675
If they're good ideas,
I'm not gonna say, "no."

427
00:18:11,841 --> 00:18:12,902
You said, "no" to this one.

428
00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,345
That's... okay, I make
one mistake in 15 years

429
00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:16,972
and you drag me over the coals.

430
00:18:17,097 --> 00:18:18,199
After everything I did for you?

431
00:18:18,223 --> 00:18:19,263
What have you done for me?

432
00:18:19,516 --> 00:18:21,351
Oh, well... what
have you done for me?

433
00:18:21,476 --> 00:18:23,395
Ed truck hired me.

434
00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:24,896
Jo promoted me.

435
00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:28,358
Gabe listened to me. All you've
ever done was say, "no" to me.

436
00:18:31,069 --> 00:18:33,113
I have ambition,

437
00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:35,115
and you kept me at
the same level for years.

438
00:18:36,199 --> 00:18:37,534
Dropping bombs, right?

439
00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:39,119
(Blowing)

440
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:40,680
This really make
you think, Michael?

441
00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:43,248
Stop it. Stop. Stop.
We're thinking.

442
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,792
We're thinking about it.
Gabe: Yeah.

443
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:48,271
You don't have to point to the
fact that we're thinking about it.

444
00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:49,879
Stop it. Just let us think.

445
00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:55,051
Okay, next time you
have a really great idea,

446
00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:57,095
we will put it in a hat,

447
00:18:57,887 --> 00:19:00,640
and then we will have Erin pick it
out of the hat and let her decide.

448
00:19:00,724 --> 00:19:02,204
I don't understand
the point of a hat.

449
00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:04,287
You're right,
we don't need a hat.

450
00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:06,021
I am not budging
on the hat issue.

451
00:19:06,104 --> 00:19:08,648
Okay, we're gonna
table the hat question.

452
00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:10,150
The best ideas are
gonna come to me.

453
00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:12,569
I make the final
decision, penod.

454
00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:16,948
Okay, we both reserve the right to
go to Jo if we disagree with Gabe.

455
00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:18,992
Okay. Darryl: Fair enough.

456
00:19:19,242 --> 00:19:22,078
Why don't we simplify this?
Darryl brings it to Michael,

457
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:24,831
Michael brings it to me,
no one calls Jo.

458
00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:28,376
Unless you and I
decide we wanna talk to Jo,

459
00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:29,544
then we'll give her a call.

460
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,171
Cool.

461
00:19:31,254 --> 00:19:33,173
Hey, sorry I left.

462
00:19:33,256 --> 00:19:35,425
I'm sorry I was a jerk.

463
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,511
Michael: Friends fight.

464
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:40,805
Friends fight.

465
00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:42,015
What's up, man?

466
00:19:42,557 --> 00:19:43,909
Sometimes it seems
like it was better

467
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,213
down in the warehouse, you know?

468
00:19:45,268 --> 00:19:47,020
When I was
a freshman in college,

469
00:19:47,103 --> 00:19:49,105
I worked at
the student newspaper,

470
00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:51,316
the Cornell daily sun.
This was at Cornell.

471
00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:54,694
I had to write an op-ed column
every day, "Bernard's regards."

472
00:19:55,236 --> 00:19:56,571
This was your freshman year?

473
00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:59,991
I started to ask myself,
do I have big plans here?

474
00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:02,952
I didn't wanna become
editor of that paper, so

475
00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:05,580
igotup and walked right
out of Walter Bernard hall,

476
00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:07,791
and that's actually when I heard

477
00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:09,959
eight male voices

478
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:11,336
singing,

479
00:20:12,087 --> 00:20:14,005
unencumbered by instruments.

480
00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:15,924
I was hooked.

481
00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:20,095
So, is becoming
ceo of this company

482
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:23,681
your a cappella group?

483
00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:27,435
Come on. We're going to
Danny's bar, public school.

484
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:29,312
No, I got some work to do.

485
00:20:29,771 --> 00:20:31,981
I do have big plans
at this company.

486
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:34,401
Erin: She... it
was fantastic. Yeah.

487
00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:35,985
It was like a little gentle...

488
00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:39,964
Jim: To be honest, I still can't
believe he didn't call her back.

489
00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:43,952
Who doesn't call
a dork like that back?

490
00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:47,997
Oh! Wow!

491
00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:49,416
Spinach in a can!

492
00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:50,834
Power from spinach!

493
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:51,960
Ag, ag, ag, ag, ag, ag!

494
00:20:52,043 --> 00:20:53,253
Oh, my hero!

495
00:20:58,216 --> 00:21:01,010
Pam: Okay, everyone, I've
tallied the votes, and the winner

496
00:21:01,511 --> 00:21:03,721
of the costume
celebration spectacular

497
00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,807
and the Scranton-wilkes-barre
coupon book,

498
00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:07,058
Oscar Martinez.

499
00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:09,519
Phyllis: Who?

500
00:21:12,856 --> 00:21:14,274
If I have to vote for someone,

501
00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,526
I don't want it to be
someone who can beat me.

502
00:21:17,569 --> 00:21:20,321
Shake things up.
I'm a nader guy.

503
00:21:21,197 --> 00:21:25,160
Best Edward James olmos
costume I've ever seen.

504
00:21:26,202 --> 00:21:27,871
Like, freaky good.

